THE SKELETON WOMAN

BY

PRASHANT PRAKASH

KALKI KOECHLIN
Characters:

A: A young woman

B: A young man, her husband

The stage is divided in two areas. They are lit

separately. Downstage, a desk and chair. A bin next to

the desk. On the desk is a toy goose and papers scattered

about messily. Crumpled sheets of paper are lying about

on the floor. Through the play, B keeps crumpling up more

pieces of paper and A keeps picking them up and putting

them in the bin.

Upstage is unlit to begin with.

In darkness. B’s voice.

A lonely fisherman cast out his hook. It drifted down in

the water till it caught, of all places, in the ribs of a

skeleton. He thought to himself – ‘Oh, now I’ve got a big

one! Now I really have one!’ But when he pulled her above

the surface of the water, he saw her lank white bones and

eerie sockets staring straight into him, and he screamed

in fear. He began rowing madly towards the shore. The

skeleton followed him. He reached the shore and looked

behind him. She was still there. He jumped out of his

boat and ran and ran. Finally he reached his house and

dove inside, thinking – ‘Safe at last.’

But when he turned around, she was right there.

2
He never realized that the whole time, she was tangled in

his line.

And then something happened to the man. Seeing her bones

jumbled up in a hopeless mess, he took pity on her. He

began untangling her bones from the line and setting them

right, until they were all in the order a human’s should

be.

Finally, exhausted, he went to sleep.

And she woke up.

Lights up downstage.

B is sitting at the desk, writing.

A enters, walks across stage in front of the desk and

exits.

She reenters in a new pair of shoes, walks across and

exits. She repeats this a number of times until finally

she is pacing back and forth noisily in a pair of high

heels.

B suddenly rolls up the paper he has been writing on and

hits her with it.

A: I’m hungry.

B: Me too.

A: Let’s order some pizza and beers and watch a movie.

B: Okay.

A: You’re getting fat.

B: So are you.

A: So let’s go out dancing instead.

3
B: Okay.

A: Should I wear the black or the red?

B: The red.

A: I think I’ll wear the black. You should shave.

B: Okay.

A: What’s the matter with you?

B: Nothing.

A: You seem bored.

B: I am.

A: So let’s do something!

B: Okay.

A: I’m sick of you.

B: Me too.

A: I’m going out. Don’t call me.

B: Okay.

A leaves.

B: Do you like fish? I, ah I love fish. Steamed, grilled,

baked, fried, smoked, raw... You name it. I love fish. I

used to be a fisherman. I caught all sorts of fish in my

time, a real rainbow collection, red snappers, grey

sharks, trout, salmon, tuna, sardines, octopus. I could

spend days at a stretch out at sea all alone waiting for

that perfect catch.

Never quite got it though. I was always going a little

bit hungry when the day was done.

A has returned, with letters.

4
A: Oh for God’s sake…

B: I thought you’d left.

A: What are you doing?

B: I thought you were leaving.

A: I am leaving.

Do you want to come?

B: No, I’m busy.

A reaches the desk and slams down the mail.

A: Fine.

B starts going through it and tears open an envelope.

B: I’d sent off another story to these people. They’ve

replied!

He reads it.

A: Well?

B passes the letter to her. She reads it and bursts out

laughing.

A: (Reading) “While we do appreciate your unfailing

enthusiasm and your steadfast perseverance, please” –

there’s another please in brackets – “stop sending us

half-written stories.”

She bursts out laughing.

Did you forget to write ‘to be continued’?

Well, you know, if you need help, you just need to ask.

She walks out, laughing helplessly.

B: You’re going to help me write?

5
He looks around at his writing. Picks up a sheet of

paper.

B: Goose at sea.

He picks up the toy goose on his desk and moves it back

and forth.

See, there’s this goose. Who lives in a pond. In a park.

She’s been there as long as she can remember. And she has

a good life. There are always people around, and she gets

fed quite well by them. Her pond is clean. She’s happy.

But one day, they were cleaning out her pond, draining it

out, and they forgot to take her out first.

He drops the goose into the bin.

She was swept away before she knew what was happening,

and the next thing…

He picks up the bin and shakes out the contents.

She found herself out at sea.

Pause.

Now consider this fat goose. She’s never been alone until

now, she’s never been out of her peaceful little pond.

She’s never ever known what it is to be free.

And the sea… is really vast.

He resumes playing with the goose.

It’s late evening now, and night is beginning to fall.

She’s panicking. She sees some caves a little distance

away and she swims towards them, thinking it might be

safer there than out in the open. So she finds a cave,

6
and she’s scared, and she’s cold, and she’s hungry… But

it is way past her bedtime. And she begins to fall

asleep.

Now in a little while, the moon rises. And with it, the

tide. The tide fills up the cave, and carries her back

out again. Half asleep, our goose is in a daze. She

doesn’t know if what’s happening is real, or if she’s

dreaming. There are all these shapes and shadows drifting

around her, swimming far beneath her…

A enters. She begins clearing up the papers and putting

them back in the bin.

A: I’m too good for you.

B: Maybe.

A: Maybe? I cook, I clean, I go out to work, I pay all

the bills, I look after myself, I look after you, and

what do you do?

B: What do I do?

A: You sit on your bum all day eating and drinking and

messing up the house.

B: And writing.

A: And writing. Sure. Writing your strange, unfinished

stories, unfinished poems, unfinished shopping lists…

Maybe you should try writing a story about trying to

write your stories, that way you might actually have

something to write about.

B: You’re so pleasant sometimes.

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A: I am, and you just don’t know it, and one day you’re

going to miss me.

A walks out.

B: Well, there were good times. My fishing days.

I had some happy memories of my fishing days.

He walks out downstage.

I would row out farther then any of the other fishermen.

He appears in dim lighting upstage, pushing out a boat.

Blue nets spread out all around it.

Where the horizon would be nothing but vast blue. And all

I would hear was the wind and the waves lapping against

my boat, and that steady comforting sound of reeling my

nets in…

He reclines in the boat.

A enters downstage.

A: Aaaahhh!

B: What happened?

A: I’m hungry.

B: There’s some fish left from yesterday’s catch.

A: No, no, no! I’m sick of fish. It’s always fish, fish

soup, fish pie, fish fry, fish fish fish. I don’t want to

see, smell, or eat another fish in my life.

Pause.

B: Did you get that job?

A: Yeah. I start next week.

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B: That’s good, that's good. You know, at least until I

start selling my stories…

A: We can pay the rent.

She exits.

From his boat, B throws out a fishing net.

A walks in from outside with heels and bag.

B: How was work?

A: Yeah, good, everyone’s really friendly there. Super

friendly…

B: That’s good. And do you have to dress like that?

A: Like what?

B: Can you breathe in that thing?

A: Well there’s no dress code, but everyone dresses

smart.

B: Ah, smart! Is that what they call it?

A: Very funny. Not everyone is comfortable wearing

scruffy clothes that get washed once a week. If it

weren’t for me, you’d have a whole farm growing on that

sweater of yours.

She takes a sip of B’s coffee, which is sitting on his

desk.

A: (Spitting it out) Yuck!

B: Oh yeah, I couldn’t figure out the machine. And

there’s no instant coffee left.

A: We’ve had that machine for six months!

9
B: I know, but you’ve always made the fancy filter

coffee. And, I mean, I have to give it to you, that thing

is complicated. I couldn’t figure out where to put the

water, or the coffee or the paper.

A: You are hopeless.

She exits.

B is dozing off in his boat. From underneath, a skeleton

hand appears and starts tickling his foot.

A reenters.

A: Why don’t you get up and clean the house?

B: I’m writing.

A: You’ve been writing all day.

B: I know.

A: Do some work.

B: This is my work.

She just didn’t know what to do… Her little brain simply

did not possess the capacity to…

A: You spend your days cooking up ridiculous ideas that

never materialize. You call that a profession?

B: But in truth, how can you blame her?

A: Are you listening to me?

B: It was all just simply beyond her range of

comprehension…

A: I’m trying to talk to you!

B: She was just… A silly goose! Haha hahaha!

A: I’m pregnant!

10
B: No you’re not.

A: Alright I’m not, but I want some attention.

Do you love me?

B: Yes.

A: Well don’t get too enthusiastic about it.

B: Do you want me to jump up and sing a song about it?

A: No, forget it.

What are you writing?

B: I’ll show you when it’s finished.

A: Hmm.

A walks out.

Blackout.

Lights up on A and B in the boat.

A: Those were bad times, those were terrible times. Your

fishing days, your fishing days, you’re always going on

about your fishing days. That soppy story of how you were

out at sea and getting hungry, well yes I’m sure you’ll

have people weeping at that. But let me tell you that

while you were out at sea, I was the one drying the fish,

cooking the fish, pickling the fish and selling the

goddamn fish. I hate fish, I hate the smell, I hate the

taste, I hate the word, I hate it, I hate fish!

B pushes A out of the boat. After a moment, he looks

around for her. She has not resurfaced.

B: Hey! Hey!

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He pulls in his fishing net frantically. He finds a

skeleton hand in it. Fadeout.

Lights up downstage. B is at his desk, writing furiously.

The skeleton hand is lying on the desk.

A comes in dripping wet and stands behind him. He does

not turn around.

A: How’s the story going?

B: You wouldn’t believe me.

A: That’s good. I hope you finish it.

What happens to her?

No reply.

What happens to the goose?

Does she live or die?

B: The goose? The goose… Uh, I don’t know… she’s

confused…

A: Maybe she’s seasick.

B: I don’t know, I don’t know. Anyway, I’m –

A and B: Not writing the goose story any more.

A: Right.

A: What are you writing now?

No reply.

What are you writing?

Water is spreading at B’s feet. He climbs up on the

chair. A does not notice it.

B: Aah!

A: What’s wrong? What are you doing?

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The water recedes and disappears. B sits.

A: You’re lost! You’re lost!

Why don’t you stick to the goose story?

B: Because I’m writing another story.

A: But why don’t you finish your stories?

B turns and notices her for the first time.

B: You’re wet.

A: Is it another story about the sea?

He dries her.

B: I’ll finish it.

Pause.

Did you see that?

A: What?

Blackout.

Lights up on A and B in the boat upstage. A is

disentangling herself from his net.

B: This thing, this thing…

A: A thing.

B: Yes this thing, with no eyeballs.

A: No eyeballs?

B: But, how should I describe it, the sockets were

looking straight at me, into me, and right through me.

A: Right through you.

B: And it had no flesh either, no blood, no veins.

A: No flesh no blood no veins.

B: It was just a living, moving, breathing, wailing…

13
A: A living, moving, breathing, wailing what?

B: Skeleton.

A: Skeleton? Skeleton?!

B: You don’t believe me.

A: No I don’t believe you.

B: No one will believe me.

A: You’re right. No one will believe you.

A jumps into the water and disappears.

B: Well listen to my story anyway!

A: But it’s not finished, is it?

B: This isn’t one of those stories.

A: It’s not about the sea?

B: It’s real!

A: What’s it about?

B: It happened when I was fishing.

A: Right…

B: Will you please just listen?

A: Sure, tell away.

Lights up downstage. A enters, sorting and folding

clothes.

B: So this creature, this skeleton thing, shaped like a

woman too, she just bounced out of my nets, over my head

and dove back into the sea quicker than I could move… I

think I must have just sat there for a good hour.

A: I’m sure you did. And did you catch any fish?

B proudly displays a skeleton hand.

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B: Look. Look!

She turns towards him.

A: Aaah!

B: Just look at it!

A: Yes, I’m looking… I’m looking and I can see some

bones… You brought home some bones… Well that’s funny,

because I was just thinking how lovely it would be to

have some roasted bones for dinner today!

B: It’s a hand, it was her hand…

A: This has to be the most ridiculous, depraved thing

you’ve done in your life! You can’t just go around

digging up people’s graves, for god’s sake! I mean, isn’t

it illegal?

B: You don’t believe me.

A: No, I don’t believe you.

B: No one will believe me.

A: No one will believe you.

B: I’m telling you the truth.

Pause.

A: Alright. Fine. Why?

B: What?

A: Why did this skeleton woman give you a hand?

B: She just left it in my net, I don’t know…

A: So what are you going to do now?

B: I don’t know.

A: Well then, you have another unfinished story.

15
She goes back to the clothes.

B: It’s not one of those stories.

A: (Caustic) It’s not? Well in that case, I really think

you should return her hand.

I mean, she must be having a tough time. A living

skeleton out at sea with only one hand. You should go

look for her, you know. In fact, she’s probably waiting

for you.

B starts getting his boat ready.

B: I’m going to go look for her…

I might be late… I think there’s some leftover fish in

the freezer…

A: I don’t want any fish… There’s too much fish… I’m sick

of…

B: She’ll help me finish it…

Crossfade upstage. B is in silhouette.

A: Who? Skeleton woman? Don’t you think she has enough

fish?

A is left alone.

Upstage, B throws out his net.

A: You live in your own head, don’t you?

I don’t suppose it would mean anything to you that I feel

alone most of the time with you.

I wanted to go for a swim, I was wondering if you wanted

to come?

How’s your story going?

16
What do you want for dinner tonight?

I could really use a holiday. Maybe we could go to the

mountains.

I sorted out your writing desk.

Can we please go out?

Do you want some pizza?

How’s your story going?

The rent’s gone up.

Come on, come to bed. You look really tired.

I bought a new dress today. Want to see it?

I’ve had a rough day.

I thought we could get the house painted. Blue?

How’s your story going?

Ok come on, I want to take you out today.

That shirt looks so good on you.

Could you give me a hand with this please?

Let’s play scrabble.

I bought you a book. To write in.

This place is a mess.

I’m going out, ok? I might be late.

I love you.

The sink’s clogged!

I’ll see you later.

You can spend the whole day looking at a ladybird or a

pile of sticks on the ground and say it’s beautiful. Yes,

I’m sure it is. But if no one’s paid the electricity

17
bill, and it’s dark, we can’t see your goddamn beautiful

sticks, can we?

Blackout downstage.

B ties the skeleton hand to a line and tosses it into the

sea.

Blackout. Splash.

Lights up downstage. B is passed out at his desk. A

storms in, slams the door and dumps her bag on B’s desk.

B: Good day?

A: (Monotone) Yes, I managed to write a concept that

everybody at work loved and the clients are taking us out

for dinner tonight.

B: Well why do you look so upset about it?

She clears up papers.

A: I don’t know, it’s been a rough day.

B: Because?

A: Because, just, I can’t explain it, lots of silly

little things get to me.

Anyway, it’s good to see you.

B: Wait.

He deftly reaches into his desk, pulls out two glasses

and a bottle of wine and pours it out.

A: Wow! You can certainly be organized when you want to.

Pause.

I’ve got to go out for dinner tonight.

B: Yeah, you said.

18
A: Yes.

A is waiting, staring at B.

B: So?

A: Well, can you come?

B: Huh?

A: I would really like it if you came with me for dinner.

B: Oh, I don’t know…

A: It’s just that it’s boring and I don’t want to go, but

I have to go because it’s kind of my project, and well,

it would make it much more bearable if you were there.

B: Come on, I don’t fit in there.

A: I know, but…

B: That last party you took me to, god…

A: I know, I know…

B: They were just so stupid.

Oh wow, you’re a writer? That’s so… dark.

A giggles.

Is ah, is that a vintage coat?

So, like, where do you guys party?

Yeah, yeah, I’m into literature, John Grisham, you know,

and I like the guy who wrote…

A: (Nods) Jurassic Park.

B: The book is so much better than the film, isn’t it?

A: Ok, yeah I know but…

B: You’re a writer? Me too, me too. Who do you write for?

Oh… Ok. Arty types.

19
A: Come on.

B: And I just cannot take your boss seriously.

A: I promise, we’ll leave after an hour.

B: I mean, he looks like a duck!

A: Please?

B: Quack.

A: Please?

B: Quack.

A: Please?

Pause.

B: I really don’t want to.

A: Please?

B: Come on, you know I’m getting somewhere with this

story.

A: So you’ve been telling me.

B: What, now you don’t believe me? You don’t really

believe I can do this do you?

A: No, it’s just… I’ve heard it before, that’s all.

B: No, why should you believe me? I mean I’ve never

achieved anything, right?

A: No, that’s not what I meant. Look, how did we get to

talking about you? I want you to listen to me. I really

really need you to come out with me tonight.

B: No, sorry, I’m not coming.

A: Why?

B: I told you I’m not good with your people.

20
A: They are not ‘my people’. You know, I’m not excited

about this either, which is why I want you to be there.

B goes back to his writing.

A: Will you please just step out of your little world for

one day, please?

B: Look, will you please just stop talking so much? I am

not going to your dinner and that’s it.

A: Oh okay. That’s it, is it? That’s how much effort you

are willing to put in this relationship.

B: What does dinner plans have to do with this

relationship?

A: Everything!

B: Really, like what?

A: Like you just spending time with me.

B: Oh yes, going out with strangers and making small talk

is unmistakably spending quality time with the person you

love.

A: Well actually, yes, doing things that don’t always

suit you, doing things even when you don’t want to do

them simply because they mean something to the other

person, is…

B: Is?

A: It’s… look I read your stories, all your stories,

unfinished, mixed up, thrown out, all of them.

B: If you’re forcing yourself to do something you don’t

want to, please don’t.

21
A: No, I just mean…

B: You just mean what?

A: I just mean I would like you to take an interest in my

life, and realize that I have to endure shitty little

problems too, that I have to struggle and work hard, and

I don’t always know why I do it, but I do it, and I could

do with the occasional encouragement.

Pause.

B: What do you want me to do? Ask you about your daily

traumas? Your boss having an affair? Your colleague’s cat

dying?

A: You’re egocentric, condescending and so pretentious.

B: Ooo, big words, did you learn them at your new job?

A: What is it that bothers you so much about my work?

That I am successful? Or that I am happy? Or that you are

neither?

B: What bothers me is you buzzing in my ear, two inches

away, like some kind of mutated giant bee every time you

walk through that door, I think this ear is starting to

go a bit deaf... Yes, it definitely hurts more than the

other one…

A walks away while he’s still talking, grabs a coat and

walks out.

A: I’ll see you later.

B tries to concentrate on his writing but can’t. Finally,

he grabs a tie, puts on his coat and follows her out.

22
Blackout.

Recorded sounds of dinner conversation.

Lights up on the desk. There is a goose is in a plate,

with cutlery laid out. B approaches, looking very

nervous.

A: (Voice) Will you stop doing that please?

For God’s sake, everyone’s staring at you!

Look, I know you don’t like it. But just eat it, please!

Listen, I need you to do this for me. I really need you.

B: I can’t!

A: Just this one time. It would really mean a lot to me.

Come on, it’s not so hard!

Don’t let me down like this.

Do you want some mayonnaise?

Excuse me! Excuse me!

B taps the goose with his knife desperately.

B: Go!

A: Yes, can we have some mayonnaise please? And some salt

and pepper?

Thank you.

Do you have to make such a fuss about everything?

You are being absolutely ridiculous.

Look, everyone else can do it. Why can’t you?

I know how you feel, ok. But you have to.

Please, please, please.

Finish it, ok. Finish it.

23
Finish it, finish it, just finish it, please. I really

want you to finish it. You have to finish it.

I want to see it finished.

B slices the goose in two.

Fadeout.

Sea sounds.

Lights up on B in his boat, writing.

B: There was once a woman who was thrown into the sea…

Here the fish ate away her flesh… and plucked out her

eyes…

Until she was nothing but a skeleton.

Uhh…

Hmm…

He reels the skeleton hand in. It dangles from the end of

his line.

Skeleton woman. Skeleton woman!

There’s no meat in your story!

He begins laughing hysterically, which soon turns to

anguish. He breaks the hand off the line, crumples up his

paper in it and sadly puts it in the sea.

Lights crossfade to downstage.

A enters with a box. She takes out a recipe book and cake

ingredients from the box. She breaks four eggs into a

bowl and starts to beat them vigorously.

B walks in.

B: What are you doing?

24
A: Making chocolate cake.

B: At three in the morning?

A: Yes, at three in the morning.

B: Why?

A: Because I’m hungry.

B: Did you not have enough to eat?

A: I’m hungry again.

B: Well, I think there’s some left over –

She glares at him.

B: Pasta… in the fridge…

A: I don’t feel like pasta, I feel like chocolate cake.

B: All right. But why aren’t you making it in the

kitchen?

A: Because the kitchen’s too small… And I don’t know but

I think it’s the hunger, it’s making me all dizzy, so at

your desk I can at least sit down and do it.

How’s the story going?

B: It’s going.

I think your eggs are done.

A: No, no, you have to beat them for ages, the longer you

beat them, the fluffier the cake.

B: And you want a fluffy cake?

A: Yes.

B: Is something wrong?

A: I told you I’m hungry.

B: You told me, yes. Is anything else wrong?

25
A: (Still beating vigorously) No.

B: I really think your eggs are beaten.

A: It says here the more you beat your eggs, the fluffier

the cake.

B: You said that already.

A: Yes.

She looks at the recipe book.

Baking powder.

She rummages in her box.

There is no baking powder.

B: No baking powder? Well, can you make your cake without

baking powder?

She sits down with her head in her hands.

A: I don’t know, can you? Can you? I don’t know!

B: Did something happen?

A: No.

B: What happened?

A: Nothing.

B: Tell me what happened.

A: It’s not a big deal, it doesn’t matter now.

B: Come on tell me, maybe I can help.

A: No you can’t.

B: What happened!

A: I quit.

B: Your job?

A: Yes, and don’t ask me why.

26
B: But…

I mean, you said you liked working there.

A: Yeah, well I lied.

B: Why?

A: I said don’t ask why!

Look there’s no sensible, logical reason behind it. I

just couldn’t breathe in there.

Everyone at work is so… so perfect. And they all look the

same, and they’re all obsessed with sparkly expensive

things. And low fat salads. And they walk around with

these smiles that look like they’ve been painted on. And

when they talk to me, they don’t look at me, they look

straight through me, straight through, like I’m

invisible.

B: I don’t think you need it.

A: What?

B: The baking powder.

A: How do you know?

B: I’ve made cake before without baking powder, if you

beat your eggs long enough, you don’t need baking powder.

A: Ok.

B: Ok.

She starts to measure out flour and B has the sieve ready

just as she’s about to look for it. She looks for the

mixing spoon. He has it ready in his other hand. B starts

beating the eggs.

27
B: So what are you going to do now?

A: I don’t know…

I need some time to figure it out.

Blackout.

Lights up.

A is lying on the floor with her feet up on the desk,

reading.

B walks in, goes to his desk.

B: Aaaahh!

A: What happened?

B: Where’s my stuff? It’s all gone! She must have taken

it away…

A: What?

B: The skeleton woman. She was here!

A: What are you going on about?

B: Look. My writing. It was all there. I’d kept it right

there. And now it’s gone.

A: Oh! Yeah, I sorted your desk out.

B: Oh…

Ok.

Thanks…

Where is everything?

A: In the drawer on the right.

B takes out different stacks of papers.

B: Labels!

A: Yeah, I hope it helps.

28
B: (Reading) Unfinished stories… incomplete novels… very

short poems…

Thanks. This is… very motivating.

Where’s the one I was writing?

A: Drawer on the left.

B opens it, removes the skeleton hand with the paper

crumpled in it.

B: Where did I… Where did you find this?

A: What?

B: This. Where was it?

A: That. That was lying on the floor. I wanted to throw

it away but I picked it up and put it in your drawer.

Only because I love you.

B: Oh…

Ok.

Thanks.

A: And if you’re looking for the pens, they’re in the

middle drawer.

He opens it, removes a pen. Sees another stack, pulls it

out.

B: Ah, there’s one more.

(Reading) ‘Assorted musings’.

A: I was going to call it ‘random ideas’, but I thought

this was more dignified.

B: Thanks.

29
Assorted musings. Kind of has a nice ring to it,

actually.

A: You’re welcome.

B looks at his writing. Looks at her.

Pause.

B: So, um… You’re going to be spending a lot more time

here at home then, aren’t you?

No reply. B nods and turns back to his writing. Tries to

write but can’t.

He sees A’s foot in front of him and tickles it.

A: (Irritated) Mmmhh.

B: What are you reading?

No reply.

Is that ‘The Old Man and the Sea’?!

No way!

Which part are you at?

A: He’s just killed the fish.

B: Oh my god. And he sees it’s too big to fit in his

boat, so he ties it to the side. Aahh!

A: Shhh!

B: Alright, alright, I won’t tell you. Just read it.

Fadeout. Lights up. B is still at his desk, trying hard

to write. A is on the other side. The book is by her side

and she is playing with the skeleton hand.

B: Did you finish it?

A nods.

30
B: How about that, huh? Damn sharks. The biggest fish

anyone has ever seen, and by the time he gets back home,

there’s nothing left except the skeleton and a bit of the

head.

And it’s crazy, because the whole time you’re thinking

it’s all about the merits of hard work, and perseverance,

and defying the odds, and it’s all going to pay off in

the end.

And then you come to realize that it’s something like

that, but it’s a little different.

A looks up.

A: Endurance.

The lights flicker and go out.

B: What the hell? Did you not pay the electricity bill?

Damn it.

He lights a match. The lights come back.

A: Ah.

B: Good timing.

He blows out the match. Goes back to his writing.

A: Can I ask you something? Don’t get mad.

B: Ok.

A: Come sit here.

B goes to her. She puts his head in her lap.

A: It’s about your last story. The goose story.

B: Oh.

A: So what happens to her? What does she do?

31
B: I don’t know. I’m stuck with that one.

But I’m writing a new one that’s going pretty well,

actually. This skeleton woman thing is the one I’m…

A: I know. But hold on a second. Just off the top of your

head. What do you think could happen next?

B: Hmm…

Well I guess she swims and she swims… in the ocean…

A: Right.

B: And she sees tons of things that she’s never seen

before.

A: Beautiful sunsets.

B: Strange creatures.

A: Things she never knew existed.

B: Things beyond her wildest dreams. And she keeps

swimming…

A: And she comes across an old, abandoned boat.

B: And she picks up a bit of seaweed and promptly hangs

herself.

Pause.

A: That’s pathetic.

B: I know, it’s really sad. But I can’t help it. It’s all

just too much for her.

A: Typical. She’s just like you. She has no ambition.

B: It’s not like I have no ambition.

A: Really? What is your ambition?

B: To be happy.

32
A: How?

B: Huh. Yeah, if I knew that…

Well, you know…

Then… I’d…

What’s your ambition?

A: To be successful.

B: Well, we can’t all have the same ambitions.

A: No, I want to be happy too. But I need to be

successful to be happy.

Does the word purpose mean anything to you?

B: It’s a small whale with teeth and a rounded snout.

Pause.

B: You didn’t say porpoise.

A: No.

You need to find a purpose to your stories, to your

characters.

I mean look at your goose, what is she doing?

B: It’s not her fault. She can’t understand it. She can’t

understand the sea. I don’t understand the sea!

A: No, you don't understand the sea but you still go out

there. You still spend hours fishing.

B: Yeah.

A: Why?

B: Because I want to catch something.

A: That's your purpose, isn't it?

33
B: I guess. That's what keeps me going, but it doesn't

keep me happy.

A: That's because you don’t know what you want! Figure

that out. And then maybe the goose has a chance.

Blackout.

Lights fade in dimly. A is asleep in front of the desk,

crumpled up in a heap. There is a plate of fish by her

side. She wakes up slowly and disentangles herself. She

is moving in a strange, inhuman manner. She notices the

fish and begins to devour it ravenously. Suddenly, the

lights change and she catches herself kneeling in front

of an empty plate. She gets up normally and looks around,

wondering what just happened. Finally she takes the plate

and goes in.

Fadeout.

Lights up downstage. B is sitting on his desk. He turns

and notices the goose with the skeleton hand in its

mouth.

B: Aah!

You’re still alive…

About the dinner thing… I’m sorry… I don’t know what came

over me.

I couldn’t help it.

Oh… you forgive me. Ok, thanks.

So, it’s great to see you and all. But I was kind of

looking for someone else.

34
What do you mean it’s all a big mistake?

Look, if you see her, could you please tell her I’m here?

And… (He snatches the hand from the goose) I have her

hand.

I am going to finish it!

Look, I just don’t have the time right now.

You and I is just too complicated.

What do I want?

He clutches the skeleton hand.

I want this.

You want to go back to the pond?

What do you mean you want to go back to the pond?

Did she give you that idea?

He laughs at her.

You know what your problem is? You have no ambition!

Oh come on! What do you mean you have no purpose? You’re

free!

He picks up the goose.

What more can you ask for?

Fly!

He throws the goose. She falls a few feet away.

Shit.

He gets up and begins to walk towards the goose.

Sea sounds fade in as the lights fade out. An overhead

projection begins. B notices large shadows drifting

across the whole stage.

35
After wandering around aimlessly in the sea for years,

the goose had lost all sense of space, and all track of

time. Everything around her was so beautiful, but so

bizarre that it was completely meaningless to her. She

liked the clouds that were there in the day, because they

looked a little like her, but much fluffier and well fed.

And she swam on day and night. And so it continued, for

nobody knows how long.

The goose lived a lonely and frightened life. She knew no

one out at sea and all around her there were always these

dark shadows moving.

The shadows form monstrous shapes.

She saw a lot of strange and terrifying creatures, but

these shadows scared her even more, because out of them,

her imagination would create the most terrible monsters

that would come and devour her.

The projection stops.

But one day, the goose looked around and there were no

black shapes. She looked up, and there were no clouds

either, just a clear blue sky. And then she saw something

white glinting below her in the water. Something fragile,

with five protruding tentacles. It seemed to be calling

to her. Around it there were other pieces, all parts of a

skeleton. It was in a hopeless mess, but there was

something so familiar about it. And the goose suddenly

36
realized she wasn’t scared. In fact, she had a strange

feeling that the skeleton was as lost as her.

Fairy lights fade in very slowly over the stage and the

audience.

When night fell, the stars filled up the sky and the

water and surrounded her completely. She thought there

were millions of pearls in the water, and searched for

the oysters that held them, because she was hungry and

she loved oysters. Especially with wine. But there was no

wine. And then she realized there were no oysters either.

And the pearls were really the reflections of the stars

that hung all around her. And everything else was

blackness.

And then, the goose had a great idea.

She took one last look all around her. And she realized

that she had everything she could possibly want out of

life.

The fairy lights begin to fade out slowly.

Almost everything. All she needed was to be happy. And so

our goose, not lonely anymore, and not scared, let

herself go and drifted down in the water towards her new

companion.

Blackout.

And she never came back up for air.

Bright lights come up downstage. An envelope falls from

the flies. B opens it and reads.

37
B: I won? I won!

Thank you!

He stands up on the desk.

This is the happiest moment of my life!

Yes, it’s called goose at sea.

Thank you.

A skeleton hand drops a few feet from the flies.

Yes?

Reporter’s Voice: How does it feel?

B: Great. Yeah. I’ve just been plugging away at it for a

really long time. And it’s been hard work. I mean, I

haven’t been out of my house for I don’t know how long.

I’ve just been sitting at my desk and writing and

writing. And there have been very hard times. But somehow

I always knew, I had this feeling that it would

eventually pay off. And I’m really glad that my work is

finally being understood, and appreciated. And that feels

really good.

Turns back to the hand.

I’m sorry, what was the question?

Another hand drops, a little closer to him.

RV: Is it true that you used to be a fisherman?

B: Yes. Yes, I used to be a fisherman. For many years.

That was an extremely rewarding period of my life. Just

being out there all alone, just you and the sea, it’s

amazing how much you can learn.

38
RV: What made you give it up?

B: (Smiles) I got lonely.

Another hand.

RV: What are your stories about?

B: Well, my writing mostly draws from my fishing days, so

my stories are mostly about the sea. But they’re really

about… life. I mean, these characters are really

grappling with the fundamental questions. About freedom,

and survival, and happiness. And things like that. What

it means to be alive.

Another hand.

RV: Would you say that your writing is more of an escape

from reality? Or a reflection of reality?

B: Well, um, I… I don’t know. I mean, it’s probably a

reflection – but sometimes an escape too. Both I guess…

I’m really not sure.

Another hand.

RV: What would you say to the view that you could never

finish your stories because you simply could not cope

with the death of your wife?

B: Next question please.

Pause.

Another hand.

RV: Are you working on anything at the moment?

B: Yes! There’s a new story. Coming up. And this is… the

one. I don’t want to sound cocky or anything, but it’s

39
going very well. And I’m very proud of it. It’s got

echoes of Hemingway.

It’s called ‘the skeleton woman’.

Lights coming up on A in the boat.

RV: Is it about her?

B: About who?

A: How was your interview?

B: Oh yeah, really good.

RV: Your wife.

B: My wife? Yes, yes, it is about my wife.

A: They wrote an article about it.

B: Really?

He notices water beginning to spread around his desk.

Oh wow!

A: (Reading)

“Fresh Catch.”

RV: Would you smile for the camera please?

He does so. Continuous camera flashes.

A: “After a series of unfinished and failed stories, our

very own Hemingway has finally come up with a success

story.”

B: Hemingway? They wrote that?

A: Yes. There’s more.

“Ironically titled ‘Goose at Sea’, the story is his first

in two years to have been completed and published.”

RV: When did the accident happen?

40
B: Uhh…

A: “There had been rumours that the local fisherman

turned writer lost his talent along with his sanity as he

spent most of his time indoors speaking to no one…

RV: How did she die?

A: Since the loss of his wife when she drowned two years

ago.”

B: (Looking at the water) Oh my god!

RV: Sir, how did she die?

B: I’m sorry, could you excuse me for a minute?

A: What were you thinking?

B: Oh the press, you know how they are, always

exaggerating everything.

A: Exaggerating? It says I’m dead!

B: Don’t believe everything you read in the papers.

A: That’s sick, you’re sick.

B: Watch out!

A: What?

B: Sharks!

A: You’re not funny.

B: I’m not joking.

RV: Are you happy?

A: Why do I put up with you?

B: (Looking at the water) Uh, I’m not sure.

RV: You’re not sure if you’re happy?

A: Can’t you take anything seriously?

41
B: I think you should start taking those sharks more

seriously, they’re getting closer.

A: Well, they can’t really hurt me. I mean they’re not

real, are they?

RV: Are your stories based on real events?

B: (To A) Of course they are!

A: As real as your goose, your boat and your dead women?

RV: So you admit your wife is dead?

B: No, I wasn’t talking to you.

A: Well, who are you talking to, then?

B: Will you just get up here? You’re getting wet.

RV: But sir, the fact is she drowned.

B: No.

A: I’m already wet.

B: No.

RV: Is everything ok?

B: No.

A: Will you get down?

B: No.

RV: Sir, do you want some water?

B: No! Will you all just stop!

A: Stop what? Stop existing?

RV: Sir, look here. Over here please!

B: No. No! Just go away and leave me alone!

Everything is still.

Pause.

42
The skeleton hands begin to ascend.

B: No wait, I’m sorry…

He looks down. The water around the desk is receding. He

starts to get down. He notices the boat and the water

moving into the wing. He sighs.

A is standing motionless upstage.

B: No boat.

He picks up the goose and puts it in the bin.

No goose.

Just you and me.

A suddenly collapses in a heap.

B rushes to her.

Get up. Get up!

Please. You have to get up. What am I supposed to do?

There’s nothing else!

The lights flicker and begin to fade.

B looks up.

He gets up slowly and begins to walk out.

Blackout.

Door slams.

43