Megan Humphrey

English Comp 1

22, April 2019

Childhood Discouragement

When growing up my mother was a single parents too three young children. She worked

two jobs to support me and my siblings, my grandma practically raised us from birth to about 5

years of age. During this time my grandma raised me and my siblings and taught us a lot of the

fundamentals of life. We saw my mother before she left for work and right before bedtime at

night. My grandma would take us to and from school fix our meals and even take us to parks

and on long walks. As a result of my mother being a single parents two three she never got the

chance to care about our school work.

I remember being in third grade, every week we had to do a times test. I struggled with

comprehension and memorization growing up because of this is I struggled a lot through school

because my mom wasn’t always available to help me. One week I got such a lower score than

my peers on the weekly times tests. I was so devastated and felt like I wasn't smart enough.

When I had this thought, it make me determined to get a high score on the following weeks test.

So I decided to study, I took so much of my playing time and devoted it to studying my times

tables. I had the help from my grandma and often times my aunt. We would study at the dinner

table, on our way to school in the morning and even in the bath.

The following week approached and it was time to take my test. I jumped out of bed ran

to get my study cards to have my grandma help me study while eating breakfast and on the way

to school. My grandma kissed me on my cheek and said to me “you got this sweetie, I know you
can do it!” and in this moment I knew I could do it, I knew I was more intelligent than I thought. I

took a deep breathe, walked into the halls of Cookson Elementary with my head held high and

confidence in myself that I could get a good grade. As walked into the bright colorful classroom

where the desks were in rows I placed my backpack on my hook with and sat down at my

assigned seat.. I was then ready, ready to take my test with confidence. It felt that I had to wait

forever for my results.

The next day came and I got my paper back and received a 95% on the test. I was

ecstatic I came home so happy running and jumping with a huge smile on my face. I couldn’t

wait for my mom to come home and see my results. So I waited and waited for her to walk

through the doors. As soon as she did I ran and grabbed my paper out of my backpack and

showed her my score. My mother replied with “ good job sweetie keep it up.” but her facial

expressions seemed like she didn’t look like she cared. This was devastating to me I worked so

hard to get that A and it seemed like my mom didn’t seem to be happy for me. This was the

moment in my life where I began to think school didn’t mean anything. I went through school

and did the bare minimum in my class, I didn’t put as much effort into my work as I wish I did.

When getting to high school everyone always told me that these were the classes that

mattered. I needed good grades in highschool to get into the good school to further my

education. I never really believed it so I then again, breezed through school. Except for my

junior year English class I failed. I failed because I didn’t ask questions like I needed, I didn’t

spend the time I needed outside of class on work. The big paper that we did for the last half of

the year I procrastinated on, I didn’t complete it with a lot of effort put into it.

Senior year came and it was supposed to the easiest for me not because I can breeze

by but because I had all the credits I needed to graduate so I didn’t have to take many classes. I

did have to keep in mind that i had to take me senior classes on top of an online class i had to
take for failing my junior english. Senior year was the year I met someone who only bettered my

life. His name was Ryan, he was such an intelligent and smart man that stood with me by it all.

We started dating the summer of 2017 and became to know each other very well. Fall of 2017

came and I choose to take classes at Sinclair Community College. Ryan was a senior in at Troy

High School at the time of my first year at college. I took general education classes that came

before the classes I needed to take for my major.

My first semester I made the mistake of taking all four classes online except for one. For

me this wasn't the best way to start my college career and resulted in me failing all but one of

my classes. When Ryan found out I failed my first semester of college he sat down with me and

told me I needed to care about my school work if I wanted to better my life. He told me he cared

about my school work, it wasn’t until then when someone was sturn with me that I began to

change my attitude towards school. I started my second semester at Sinclair and took all but

one of my classes on the Dayton Campus. I focused on my school work and did my best. I still

struggled every day I struggled with the motivation in doing the work I struggled with the

comprehension side of the school work. School was still a struggle for me. Ryan was the only

person who showed how much he cared about how I did in my classes and was there to help

me even when he had his own classes to complete. Because Ryan cared I begun to get

motivation to do my work and get a good grades so someone could be proud of me.

Next semester came and I took classes again. With Ryan by my side helping me

through it all, I began to strive to do better. I developed a want to learn and a want to get good

grades. I started to care about the amount of effort and work I turned into my professors. I

begun to bring home A’s and B’s, and have pride in the grades I brought home. Ryan would ask

me what my grades looked like throughout the school year and when the semester came to an

end he would ask me what my grades looked like. It was such a good feeling to know that
someone cared, and I could do it. Since my childhood I have noticed that I struggled with self

confidence in my academic work. Which resulted in my low academic performance. All

throughout grade school I never believed in myself.

I never thought that I could do so well in school. Now, I know that I can do it I can

perform anything that I put my mind to. Looking back from where I was in second grade to

where I am not in my academic career makes me feel proud about myself. Nothing is impossible

anyone can do anything they want, they just have to have the drive and determination to want to

succeed. Not everything's comes easy to people, somethings we have to work for, put in the

effort to get the results we want. I have come a long way in my education career. Anyone who

doesnt think they can do it or doesn't believe in themselves, I suggest you find that one person

who pushes you to be the very best you can be.

Above is a picture of Ryan and I in Panama City Beach in 2017. We were walking down the pier

in the evening.