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ORIGINAL ARTICLES: INFERTILITY

Adversities of being infertile: the


experience of Jordanian women
Salwa Obeisat, R.N., D.N.Sc., Muntaha K. Gharaibeh, R.N., Ph.D., Arwa Oweis, R.N., D.N.Sc.,
and Huda Gharaibeh, R.N., Ph.D.
Faculty of Nursing, Jordan University of Science and Technology, Irbid, Jordan

Objective: To describe and interpret the experiences of and adversities faced by infertile Jordanian women as described from their own
perspectives.
Design: A qualitative descriptive design.
Setting: The women were interviewed at a nonprofit women's organization in the north of Jordan. The organization focuses on em-
powerment and health issues.
Patient(s): This study included a purposive sample of 25 infertile Jordanian women who were unsuccessfully trying to conceive for
a minimum of 1 year, and who were receiving treatment for infertility.
Intervention(s): Face-to-face, in-depth, semistructured interviews were conducted, audiotaped, and transcribed using thematic
analysis.
Main Outcome Measure(s): Outcomes were measured using thematic analysis of the interview transcripts.
Result(s): Four key adversity themes emerged from the data: the adversity of incomplete being, the social adversity of being infertile,
the adversity of another wife, and the adversity of changes in the marital relationship.
Conclusion(s): Jordanian women are seriously affected by infertility and experience personal, social, and marital adversities, which
affect their well-being. These adversities need to be conceptualized within a framework that
can be used to empower and counsel infertile women in all aspects of life. (Fertil SterilÒ Use your smartphone
2012;98:444–9. Ó2012 by American Society for Reproductive Medicine.) to scan this QR code
Key Words: Infertility, adversities, Jordanian women, experience and connect to the
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I
nfertility is a worldwide health enced to a large degree by religion and licly disclosed; and 3) more attention is
problem that profoundly impacts the social norms concerning marriage, given to ‘‘high’’ fertility in the non-
the lives of both men and women. divorce, and family organization (1). Western world, which fails to regard
Globally, 10%–15% of couples of Although several studies have been infertility as a significant priority (5, 6).
childbearing age experience infertility conducted on reproduction and certain Infertility interferes with all aspects
(1, 2). According to the World Health aspects of infertility, it continues to be of a couple's relationship and presents
Organization, about 80 million people overlooked as a public health issue, a major life challenge to those who
in the world live with infertility (3). In especially in developing countries (5). desire children (2). It impacts the health
many cultures around the globe, the Several reasons for this have been and well-being of individuals, couples,
inability to conceive and the resulting identified: 1) infertility is most often and society as a whole. The burden of
childlessness are often highly stigma- considered a private individual medical infertility includes psychological, so-
tizing, leading to profound social condition; 2) reproductive failure, espe- cial, and physical consequences, such
suffering for infertile couples (4).The cially male failure, is a taboo subject as anxiety, depression, helplessness,
perceptions of childlessness are influ- disguised in stigma and often not pub- marital intimidation, abandonment,
economic hardship, social stigma,
social isolation, and physical violence
Received January 1, 2012; revised April 3, 2012; accepted April 24, 2012; published online May 26, (2, 5, 7–9). Although consequences of
2012.
S.O. has nothing to disclose. M.K.G. has nothing to disclose. A.O. has nothing to disclose. H.G. has
infertility vary in nature and severity
nothing to disclose. between developing and developed
Supported by Al Al-Bayt University, Mafrak, Jordan. countries, people in developing coun-
Reprint requests: Salwa Obeisat, R.N., D.N.Sc., Faculty of Nursing, Jordan University of Science and
Technology, P. O. Box 3030, Irbid, Jordan (E-mail: smobeisat@just.edu.jo). tries are more severely affected by the
devastations of infertility due to its
Fertility and Sterility® Vol. 98, No. 2, August 2012 0015-0282/$36.00
Copyright ©2012 American Society for Reproductive Medicine, Published by Elsevier Inc.
higher prevalence and the pater-
doi:10.1016/j.fertnstert.2012.04.036 nalistic social norms (5, 7).

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In most areas of the world, women's well-being appears to whether she or her husband were responsible for the problem,
be more seriously affected by infertility than that of men (10). and who were receiving treatment for infertility. Only women
In developing countries, including Jordan, the role or status of under treatment were selected due to the cultural sensitivity
women is defined by their reproductive capacity, and having of this issue—women could not be approached unless they
children is a woman's only chance to improve her status in so- were seeking treatment.
ciety and within the family (8). Conversely, infertility creates The participant's average age was 31.8 years (range,
significant social repercussions for women, including 19–40 years). The average length of marriage was 10.5 years
unstable marriages, domestic violence, stigmatization, and os- (range, 2–20 years). About 39% of participants had a college
tracism (6, 11–13). or university education, whereas 60.9% had a high school ed-
Jordan is predominantly Muslim with a population of ucation or less. Most of the participants were unemployed
6 million, and a population growth rate of 2.3%. The total (58.3%). The majority of couples (73.9%) had waited 1 year
fertility rate in Jordan is considered high despite a decline or more after marriage to start fertility investigations,
from 7.3% in 1975 to 3.8% in 2009 (14). In recent years, infer- whereas 26.1% started medical investigations within less
tility has become an obvious reproductive health problem en- than 1 year. Fertility investigation in the interviewed sample
countered by many Jordanian couples. All infertility treatment was initiated by women in 65% of cases, by both partners in
technologies are available in Jordan. Assisted reproductive 25% of cases, and by men only in 10% of the cases. Seventy-
technologies (ART) are acceptable, allowed, and encouraged six percent of the participants had medical insurance; of
by Islam, especially because adoption is not an acceptable so- those, only 10% had insurance that covered infertility
lution (15). Islam has guiding principles for the use of ART—it treatments. The responsibility for infertility was ascribed to
should be practiced only by married couples, within the con- the woman (54.2%), the man (25%), both partners (16.7%),
text of a valid marriage, and performed by a competent medical or unknown (4.2%).
team. The use of donor sperm, egg, and embryo is not accept-
able and, in fact, condemned by Islamic law (15–17). Despite
the availability of these treatments and their advanced Procedure
technologies, infertile couples in Jordan bear the financial All women were first identified with the help of the nonprofit
burden of treatment as only infertility investigations and organization director who served as liaison between the
tests are covered by the health insurance system. women and the researchers. The women were then contacted
There are few statistics regarding the infertility rate in by the researchers and asked to voluntarily participate in the
Jordan. However, available statistics are limited to the num- study. Before the interview, each woman was briefed on the
ber of successful IVF trials and are reported for different infer- purpose of the study and was asked to consent to the study.
tility treatment centers. In addition, studies about infertility All interviews were conducted face-to-face in a quiet private
among Jordanian women and its psychological implications room at the women's nonprofit organization using in-depth,
are lacking. Therefore, in this study, we aim to describe and semistructured interviews. Participants were asked to respond
interpret the experiences of Jordanian women with regard to the main question—‘‘Tell me how you feel about being
to infertility from their own perspectives as the first step to unable to conceive naturally and about being infertile’’—
understanding their suffering. Findings of this study are of and other probing questions. Women were encouraged to
great relevance and importance for all health professionals talk and to express their feelings, perceptions, and thoughts
in practice settings and in the community and are important of their experience. A pilot study was conducted on four
for establishing strategies to counsel and support infertile women to assist the researchers with the data collection pro-
couples coping with these problems. cedure and to determine how to address the research question
and clarify details.
All interviews were conducted in Arabic. Each interview
MATERIALS AND METHODS was tape recorded and lasted between 30 and 45 minutes.
Design Data collection lasted for about 15 months (April 2006–July
A qualitative descriptive approach was used with semistruc- 2007). The length of the interview varied according to the
tured, in-depth interviews to describe the adversities faced stage of saturation and the emergence of new themes. Signif-
by infertile women. This approach permitted Jordanian icant themes were well established and validated by their
women to verbalize their own feelings and experiences and repetitive nature.
to provide the subjective data necessary for understanding
the context of their experience.
Ethical Considerations
The study was approved by the Ethical Committee of the
Participants Faculty of Research Studies at Jordan University of Science
A purposive sample of 25 infertile Jordanian women was used and Technology and the Ethical Committee of the Research
to accurately describe their experiences. Participants were and Graduate Studies Faculty at Al Al-Bayt University (the
recruited from a nonprofit organization in the north of Jordan funding institution). All women consented in writing to
that focuses on women's empowerment and health issues. participation and to allow the researchers to make follow-
Inclusion criteria were: women who had been trying unsuc- up contact to confirm the components and interpretation of
cessfully to conceive for a minimum of 1 year regardless of data analysis.

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ORIGINAL ARTICLE: INFERTILITY

All women were assured of anonymity and confidential- a mother and I cannot. I want children who can say
ity and that they had the right to withdraw from the study at mom, I want to raise them up and fulfill all their needs,
any time. Women were also informed that there were no risks I want to feel useful and create a family.’’
in participating in the study.
‘‘To be a mother is the most important thing that any
Transcribing, Translation, and Data Analysis woman wishes; childlessness is the biggest problem in
my life. We must create a family and have children,
The researcher's recorded interviews were transcribed and my husband wanted children, and all of his brothers
translated into English to minimize loss of data, and then have children but he does not have at least a child.’’
back-translated. Although the researchers tried to present
factual data during translation, they were also concerned Women worry and feel anxious around their menstrual
with the richness of the personal and cultural aspects of the time. The presence of menstrual blood is a constant re-
participant's experience. Data were analyzed using a thematic minder of their inability to become pregnant and a complete
content analysis (18). During data analysis and to ensure being.
consistency, all researchers met regularly during 4 months
‘‘How can I forget? Every month, when I get my period,
to discuss and validate each of the steps of the analysis pro-
I feel like screaming. I stay in my room crying when I do
cess. First, data for each of the women were read several times
not demonstrate the physical and symbolic signs and
and their feelings, attitudes, and thoughts about infertility
changes of pregnancy.’’
were identified and carefully listed by all researchers indepen-
dently. The second step of analysis focused on the researcher's Women who failed to conceive because of their husband's
explanations for the stated feelings and thoughts provided by infertility had similar feelings and live with a dilemma. They
the women in which the meaning of these categories were hide the truth about their husband's infertility because they
analyzed and integrated into a theme. In the third step, re- do not want their husbands to be judged as an incomplete
searchers reached a consensus on the final categories (identi- being.
fied themes). These categories were defined with labels with
similar semantic content and a label that appropriately ‘‘I never told my family that my husband is infertile
represented the meaning of each category was attached to it. because this affects his masculinity and social status.
My husband can't adapt to this situation, he will have
the feeling of incompleteness, and people look at
Trustworthiness infertile men as weak incomplete persons.’’
The trustworthiness of the findings was maintained using
credibility, conformability, and transferability. Credibility
was ensured using the member checking approach: the re- ‘‘My husband is the one who is infertile, he suffers the
searcher returned the transcripts to five participants to verify shame and humiliation of being incapable. Men cannot
that the data and the interpretation of the findings reflected accept this while women can accept it and hide the
the women's experience with infertility. Conformability was suffering.’’
ensured through the process of ‘‘bracketing,’’ whereby all Women expressed their feelings that they are socially
previous knowledge, beliefs, and common understandings stigmatized and labeled as being useless and having no pur-
about a given phenomenon are set aside. Transferability pose in life and used metaphors for infertility.
was established through ‘‘thick description,’’ in which detailed
descriptions of data with a rich mix of participant's quota- ‘‘People describe the infertile woman as a tree without
tions were considered. crops, which must be cut off from its roots.’’

RESULTS Social Adversity of Being Infertile


The study revealed four themes of adversities: the adversity of The social adversities of being infertile reflect the women's
incomplete being, the social adversity of being infertile, the struggle with constant pressure and interference by their
adversity of another wife, and the adversity of changes in social system. The pressure to conceive is mainly from the
the marital relationship. husband's family and is directed toward the wife.
‘‘Wherever I go, my husband's family and friends ask
Adversity of Incomplete Being me questions such as: ‘Are you expecting anything
The theme of adversity of incomplete being reflects the feeling soon? When you will make us happy?’ The pressure is
of women as failures to conceive, become a complete being, on me, nobody asks my husband. I hate going out;
and realize the family they always dreamt of. Women believe they make me miserable.’’
that the purpose of marriage is to build a family and to be-
come mothers to satisfy their natural instincts and existence.
‘‘When people at work ask me how long we've been
‘‘Getting married means creating a family and having married, I always answer that I have been married
children, everyone likes to have children and each only for one year rather than four to avoid their
woman after marriage keeps looking forward to be questions.’’

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‘‘Even though my husband is the infertile one, his Women were concerned about the sustainability of their
friends and brothers told him that he can marry another marriage and weighed their available options. They found
woman and God will give him children.’’ that suggesting marriage to a second wife could be the best
solution.
In most cases, women were badly treated by their
husband's families, usually by the mothers-in-law and ‘‘To keep my husband and gain his trust, I will ask him
sisters-in-law, who insist that the husband should seek treat- to marry another wife, so I can sustain my marriage and
ment and even interfere with the couple's infertility treatment gain the respect of the society and enjoy his children.
decisions. His family will respect me too and I will not be consid-
ered a selfish person.’’
‘‘Each time I have my menstruation, my mother-in-law
stops talking to me; she keeps track of my menstrual
cycle. My sister-in-law keeps telling my husband that
he must get married to another woman with no need Adversity of Changes in the Marital Relationship
to wait for treatment results.’’ Infertile women reported changes in the seriousness of their
marital relationship. The changes were seen in two aspects:
the sexual relationship and the couple's future plans.
‘‘My mother-in-law keeps asking, ‘What are you wait-
ing for? Get treatment soon. I want to see your children ‘‘My husband is the one who is infertile. He does not like
before I die.’ For me, this is hard, since I am the infertile to express his feelings, he hides them and shows no
one.’’ interest in sex. He says: ‘There is no need for making
love’.’’
The continued pressure forced many couples to avoid
talking and expressing their feelings regarding infertility These statements create more stress for the women and
and its treatment. make them feel that they should ignore their sexual needs.
‘‘We did IVF three times without telling any of our ‘‘There is no sexual relationship between us. Why
families, because they keep asking about the results, should we have sex, we cannot have babies anyway.’’
this irritates me and puts more pressure on us.’’
Women also reported changes in their plans for the fu-
ture. As a couple, they stopped planning for the future and
the women expressed feelings of disappointment at being
Adversity of Another Wife unable to follow through with their previous plans and in
Women expressed their feelings that the husband taking some instances, cancelled them.
another wife is inevitable or foreseeable as a solution for their
infertility problem. ‘‘When we got married, our dreams and plans were to
have children, build a big house with a room for each
‘‘My husband's family pushes him to marry another child, save money for their education; it is a problem
woman as soon as possible. I am not happy and I am now. Who will use the money and the inheritance we
sure that this day will come, and my husband will marry leave behind?’’
another woman to have a child who will carry his name
and extend his family.’’
‘‘We were living in my husband's family's house, we
Women are also encouraged by their own families to sug- then built a big house. Five years have passed and
gest a second wife. no children yet. If we had been told that we would
not have a chance to have a baby, we may have stayed
‘‘My brothers are convinced that I should support my
in the same house, and used the money for other
husband to marry another wife to avoid divorce.
things.’’
Divorce is not acceptable in our society, if I agree to
the marriage I can stay with my husband and I do not
have to go back to my family.’’
DISCUSSION
The women considered polygamy the husband's right and This study contributes to the body of knowledge on the
a solution to the financial burden of infertility treatment. adversities of being infertile from the cultural perspective of
Jordanian Muslim women. Although these adversities were
‘‘We will try all available treatments; if we fail to have
separately reported, they are interrelated and reflect a mixture
a baby, I will ask him to marry another woman, because
of the women's interpretations of their reactions, interactions,
it's his right to have children and if I do not suggest
and responses to their infertility problems.
a second wife, his mother and sisters will do so.’’
The perception of being incomplete starts when a woman
is unable to conceive naturally and begins infertility treat-
‘‘My husband told me: ‘Shall we waste our money on ment. Women's experiences and feelings about being infertile
IVF? Can I instead save the money to marry another were evident in their reports of failing to create a family, have
woman and have children?’ I think this is more useful.’’ a purpose in life, demonstrate the symbolic changes of

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pregnancy, and achieve the goal of marriage in experiencing their options were limited, forcing them to agree either to
a maternal role. Even if the husband is the one who is infertile, another wife or to a divorce.
Jordanian women still endure this feeling on behalf of their Allowing husbands to marry a second wife to have chil-
husbands. These findings are consistent with other studies dren is parallel to the concept of adoption in non-Muslim
(19–22). Callister (23) raised the issue of gender differences countries. Adoption, as perceived in other societies, is forbid-
in responding to infertility and concluded that women den in Islam. The alternative term for adoption in Islam is
experience more infertility-related concerns such as self- kafala, which comes from a word that means ‘‘to feed’’ and
blame, self esteem, and social avoidance than their male is governed by certain rules. The most important rules are
partners. Furthermore, if the male partner is infertile, the that the adopted child should retain his or her own biological
woman often becomes depressed because she bears his suffer- family name, cannot inherit from his or her adoptive parents,
ing of being infertile and effects of his personality and social and members of the adoptive family are not considered blood
behaviors (24). relatives and are therefore not ‘‘muhrim’’ to him/her. ‘‘Muh-
In the Arab and Muslim cultures, a family is not complete rim’’ refers to a specific legal relationship that regulates mar-
without children, because children are considered a symbol of riage and other aspects of life (25, 27). As a result of the strict
continuity of the generations and support the tribal society, in Islamic rules on adoption and the stigma associated with
which larger families are more recognized and hold greater divorce, women are left with only one choice, which is that
social status and influence in the country (20, 22). The of a second wife. Women preferred to stay with their
reasons for having children, according to Jordanian women, husband to avoid the social stigma of divorce and its
are to fulfill one's destined role as a woman, create consequences of financial insecurity, lack of family support,
a family, maintain family lineage, establish future economic and absence of societal respect (27).
and emotional security, and to provide a safeguard against The women in this study reported a change in the marital
divorce (20). Dyer et al. (25), in a qualitative study of South relationship as a result of infertility. They reported a change
African Muslim women, report that having a child was the in their intimate marital relationship because there was no
only wish for these women and they considered having apparent purpose in having sex, as it would not lead to con-
children the primary function of being a woman. In their ception. The change in the relationship was also evident in the
study, one Muslim woman said, ‘‘I cannot be anybody in couple's lack of interest in planning their future together and
the world if I cannot bear children’’ (25, p. 1665). even in the cancellation of future plans. These findings are
It is evident from the findings of the study that infertile consistent with literature indicating that infertile couples
couples who remain childless are subject to social pressures are faced with the fact that their conscious and unconscious
from their families and society. The women felt that the life-plan may be at risk (9, 29). Exposure of the marital
family's and society's interference intensifies the adversities relationship to negative changes could be related to the
of infertility. Women are the ones blamed for infertility. As couple's psychological pressures as a result of their inability
a result, women preferred to be isolated to avoid hearing to have children in a culture that highly values children and
painful comments from family and friends. Being infertile is considers raising children an obligation and the supreme
a stigma for which women bear the sole blame. Unfortunately, goal of marriage (27, 30, 31).
all infertility investigations are done on the women first, which In Islam, sexuality is considered part of a person's identity
places women under many social, psychological, and marital as a human being. For Muslims, based on an understanding of
pressures (20, 22, 25). These findings support the findings of the Qur'an (the Muslim holy book) and the Hadith (sayings of
Khalaf and Callister (20) who report that infertile Muslim the Prophet Mohamed), sexual relations are confined to mar-
women are subjected to social pressure to get pregnant as riage between a wife and husband. Within this context, the
soon as the first month of marriage. Similar findings are role of a healthy sexual relationship is extremely important.
reported by Fido and Zahid (26) that childlessness subjects Beyond childbearing, sexual relations assume a prominent
women to social stigmatization and places them at risk for role in the overall well-being of the marriage. Both the
serious social and emotional consequences. Qur'an and the Hadith allude to the nature of sexual relations
The most important adversity that emerged in this study, as means of attaining mutual satisfaction, closeness, and
and one that is not common in Western culture, is the adver- compassion between a wife and husband (32).
sity of the husband marrying another woman—polygamy. In conclusion, infertility is a traumatic life event for
Polygamy is supported by the culture and the Islamic religion Jordanian women that touches every part of their lives and
as an option for solving the infertility problem (27). The is embraced by the societal rules that they are forced to follow.
women participating in this study indicated that allowing The adversities described by Jordanian women provide an
their husbands to have a second wife could be the only solu- insight into how social and cultural meaning of parenthood
tion for overcoming the social adversities of being infertile. influences their experience. These adversities need to be con-
They reported that they were willing to endure the sociocul- ceptualized within a framework that can be used to empower
tural and economic consequences of this solution (27). Infer- and counsel infertile women on how to deal and cope with the
tile women have a persistent feeling that their marriage will personal, social, and cultural aspects of their experience. It is
end in divorce if they do not accept the idea of a second crucial for all health care professionals to understand and
wife. These findings support previous studies (13, 21–28) interpret the adversities of infertility, so that they are able
that report women's fears of being divorced and/or to design and implement conductive and supportive programs
abandoned by their husbands. As a result, women felt that for the care of infertile women. Additional evidence-based

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