CLE 1210 Session 6

Achieving Cohesion

Task 1
Read the following paragraphs and find out all the “Reference Reminder Language” (i.e. the
language that helps the reader know clearly which idea comes from a source).

Excerpted from Paragraph B (on Development)

Patel (2006) states that “[to] assume that every child is at the same developmental level at seven,
nine, fourteen and sixteen [is to] defy all that is known about child development” (p.45). The author
conducted an investigation on the linguistic skills of 2,000 school children at different ages and
examined the relationship between age and cognitive development. He proposes the idea of
“personalized learning”, which is to help children learn at their own pace and handle tests better
when the time is appropriate (Patel, 2006, p.65). In his discussion of the drawbacks of standardized
testing, Patel concludes that because many candidates are not ready for imposed mass testing on
the same day and at the same time, noticeable personal pressures are created.

Paragraph D (on Washback Effects)

Opponents of standardized testing criticize these tests for establishing a regime in which the tests
and the accountability attached to them become ‘high stakes’ and produce ‘washback’ effects on
teaching. ‘Washback’ effects refer to the impact that tests have on the process of teaching and
learning. Teachers are pressurized by the three ‘Ps’, principals, parents and peers, to ensure that the
required number of their students achieve benchmark levels. Standardized tests supposedly reflect
what a student should be able to do in key areas at the four ‘key’ ages. Because of these factors,
teachers are forced to teach to the content of the tests. This determines the input and the output of
lessons which means the actual learning needs of the students are determined by the outside
testing authorities. Ironically, these tests largely test what matters least, facts rather than opinion.
Davidson’s (1999) research in this area provided sufficient data to indicate that some of the richest,
most meaningful and stimulating curriculum units are disappearing from schools. She argues that
“rigorous interdisciplinary projects are not being pursued because time has to be given to input for
the tests, which produces negative consequences on learning” (p.69). It is also observed that the
real curriculum and its subjects, for example, critical thinking and areas in art education, which
provide strategies and skills for the whole person, are sidelined by the tests (Davidson, 1999).
Opponents of standardized testing, therefore, contend that the supposed benchmarks are often
constructed solely to satisfy the education authorities. Evidence is also cited by opponents that the
benchmarks established by these organizations are closer to ‘imagined’ or ‘idealistic’ levels rather
than what students can do or need to do in the real world at the various ages (Baker et.al, 2004)
Task 2
Highlight the transition words in the following two texts. Note the differences in how the writer
does the transition between ideas.

Text A
While some secondary school graduates prefer working and earning soon, it seems more beneficial
for students to continue their studies at university. Firstly, academic qualifications are required in
many professions. Moreover, it is impossible to become a doctor, teacher or lawyer without having
the relevant degree. Furthermore, graduating from a university gives people more choices when it
comes to choosing a job. Consequently, most employers will be more impressed by a candidate who
has a degree than they would be by one who only has secondary school qualifications because it shows
a certain level of intelligence and education, as well as the commitment and self-discipline that is
needed in order to study a degree course for four or five years. Apart from that, university graduates
also tend to earn higher salaries than those with fewer qualifications.
(136 words)

Adapted from http://www.makkarielts.com/education-essays/126-education-essay-should-young-people-go-for-

university-education-or-work-as-car-mechanics-or-builders.html

Text B: Paragraph B (on Development)

1
Another major argument against these tests is that they focus on specific areas and ignore the
broader development of the child. 2One of the major aims of education and teachers is to develop all
aspects of the child. However, children develop, grow and acquire knowledge at different rates and
at different ages. 3Patel (2006) states that “[to] assume that every child is at the same developmental
level at seven, nine, fourteen and sixteen [is to] defy all that is known about child development” (p.45).
The author conducted an investigation on the linguistic skills of 2,000 school children at different ages
and examined the relationship between age and cognitive development. He proposes the idea of
“personalized learning”, which is to help children learn at their own pace and handle tests better when
the time is appropriate (Patel, 2006, p.65). In his discussion of the drawbacks of standardized testing,
Patel concludes that because many candidates are not ready for imposed mass testing on the same
day and at the same time, noticeable personal pressures are created.
Task 3
Read the following two versions of the same text. Underline all the subjects. Identify which version
follows the ‘known-new principle’.

Version A
The option to start work immediately after graduating from secondary school is appealing for
several reasons. Many young people want to start earning money as soon as possible. To become
independent and be able to afford one’s own living or start a family would be possible. In terms
of their career, progress would be made more quickly when young people decide to find work
rather than continue their studies. There would be the chance to gain real experience and learn
practical skills related to their chosen profession. Promotions and a successful career may be
resulted.

Version B
The option to start work immediately after graduating from secondary school is appealing for
several reasons. Many young people want to start earning money as soon as possible. In this way,
they can become independent and they will be able to afford their living or start a family. In terms
of their career, young people who decide to find work rather than continue their studies may
progress more quickly. They will have the chance to gain real experience and learn practical skills
related to their chosen profession. This may lead to promotions and a successful career.

Task 4
Identify the reference of each pronoun underlined in Parts 1, 2, 3, and 4. What do they refer to?

Paragraph D (on Washback Effects)

Opponents of standardized testing criticize these tests for establishing a regime in which the tests
and the accountability attached to them become ‘high stakes’ and produce ‘washback’ effects on
teaching. ‘Washback’ effects refer to the impact that tests have on the process of teaching and
learning. Teachers are pressurized by the three ‘Ps’, principals, parents and peers, to ensure that the
required number of their students achieve benchmark levels. Standardized tests supposedly reflect
what a student should be able to do in key areas at the four ‘key’ ages. Because of 1these factors,
teachers are forced to teach to the content of the tests. 2This determines the input and the output
of lessons which means the actual learning needs of the students are determined by the outside
testing authorities. Ironically, these tests largely test what matters least, facts rather than opinion.
Davidson’s (1999) research in 3this area provided sufficient data to indicate that some of the richest,
most meaningful and stimulating curriculum units are disappearing from schools. She argues that
“rigorous interdisciplinary projects are not being pursued because time has to be given to input for
the tests, which produces negative consequences on learning” (p.69). It is also observed that the
real curriculum and its subjects, for example, critical thinking and areas in art education, which
provide strategies and skills for the whole person, are sidelined by the tests (Davidson, 1999).
Opponents of standardized testing, therefore, contend that the supposed benchmarks are often
constructed solely to satisfy the education authorities. Evidence is also cited by opponents that the
benchmarks established by 4these organizations are closer to ‘imagined’ or ‘idealistic’ levels rather
than what students can do or need to do in the real world at the various ages (Baker et.al, 2004)
Task 5
You can achieve the ‘known-new principle’ by:
(a) Using a pronoun to refer to something in the earlier sentence
(b) Repeating a word from the earlier sentence
(c) Using words related in meaning to the earlier sentence (i.e. synonyms)
(d) Using words that echo an entire idea from the earlier sentence (i.e. summary words)
(e) Using passive voice

Match the following examples with the above strategies:

Strategy

i. Students build empathy when they know their peers’ stories. These ___________
stories strengthen student voice, and student voice is a key part of
engagement.
ii. Some candidates, for example those with disabilities or medical ___________
conditions, are allowed adjustments to their exams. These can include
extra time, a reader or scribe, coloured exam papers or a sign-
language interpreter.
iii. In recent years, the number of students applying to Ph.D. programs ___________
has increased steadily, while the number of places available has
remained constant. This situation has resulted in intense competition
for admission.
iv. After 1997, the government introduced a policy to require schools to ___________
use Chinese as the medium of instruction. The implementation of the
policy was triggered by the changing political background at that time.
v. Pupils in schools must learn English and poetry offers a creative outlet ___________
for a subject that would otherwise be repetitive and boring. Poetry
also introduces the reader to new concepts which hold the learner’s
interest and improve vocabulary and spelling.
vi. At the university, education major students learn a lot of concepts ___________
about how to teach. However, the theories they have learnt cannot
always be applied in the classroom in reality.
vii. The new contract delighted the teachers. Nevertheless, it infuriated ___________
the superintendent of schools, the principals, and all the assistant
administrators.
viii. Children are learning all the time about things they are passionate ___________
about. They are not waiting for teachers to teach them.
ix. The new curriculum is characterized with an increased emphasis on ___________
patriotism. This feature is one reason for the controversy of this newly
proposed education reform.
x. People have begun to question the value of national education in ___________
school curriculum. This skepticism has been both harmful and
beneficial.
Task 6
Rewrite the following sentences to improve the flow by paying attention to the order of old and
new information and the change of focus between sentences.

Text 1
Original:

The hotel is famous. It is one of the most well-known in the country. The latest international
dancing competition was held at the hotel. A lot of money was spent to advertise the event
because the hotel wanted to gain international reputation. However, not many people attended
the event.

Your Revised Version:

Text 2
Original:

English language instructors know that students need to understand the difference between
formal and informal language. Students cannot usually understand such differences quickly.

Your Revised Version:

Text 3
Original:

Homework is a vital and valuable part of education. There are only a few hours in each school
day. Children have a lot to learn. There is not enough time to cover all the subjects. Setting
homework extends study beyond school hours. A wider and deeper education can occur. It also
makes the best use of teachers. Students could do their work at home. Teachers can spend lesson
time teaching rather than just supervising individual work. Education is about pushing boundaries.
Learning should not stop at the entrance to the classroom. Students should take skills learnt in
the classroom and apply them at home. Homework allows this to happen. Students are
encouraged to go above and beyond what they do in school. Reading is the best example.
Students learn how to read at school. In order to become a better reader, they need to practice
at home. Parents can give them help and students can learn at their own pace.

Your Revised Version: