Zach Jones

Writing 2

Tym Chajdas

November 26, 2019

The Death of an Empty Man

There is nothing the man who hasn’t lived fears more than the certainty of death. -ZJ

Room 838 was a living coffin. In it lay two men simply existing with no hope for

anything besides death. It was only through a window in the corner of the room could these men

marked for death see the world they once lived in.

Their ages were written on their bodies. Their wrinkled faces resembled the cracked

concrete leading into the iron factory they worked as younger men. Their hands were calloused

and scarred marking their laborious profession. Their knees, now too weak to support their

weight, lay stiff having not moved since they were placed in death’s waiting room. Deleted: this room of death.

For three months, Henry had been lying next to John in room 838 of the Buhzen Hospice Deleted: laying

Care Center as they waited for death to call their number. Henry had pancreatic cancer and after

a year of chemotherapy had accepted the certainty of his place and had his family place him in

hospice care to wait. John was a heavy smoker and was dying of lung cancer. For two and a half

years John spent every dime he had gone to the best doctors across China, none of which were

able to stop deaths certainty. Once his pockets were empty the state was gracious enough to

sentence him to die in room 838 of a hospice center.

Their relationship as they sat waiting for death was one fueled by pity and jealousy.

Henry lived a long happy life of seventy-three years. At twenty-one he married a woman he truly

loved and lived each day for her. He took a job that worked him to the bone at the local iron

1
factory, but nothing mattered when he would return home to see the face on his loving wife. Deleted: and

Henry always described their love the eternal burning of two colliding stars. Together they had

four children, all of whom married loving spouses and moved into better houses than they were

raised in. After forty years of working at the iron factory Henry was able to retire and lived out

the next nine years loving his wife with the same passion he had when they were twenty.

With his wife, four children, and twelve grandchildren there was not a lonely moment in

Henry’s life until his wife died. As a seventy-year-old widower, Henry turned to his lifelong Deleted: seventy year old

Christian faith to renew his purpose. Henry became an active member of his church and found

great joy in becoming an altar server for communion.

Now laying in room 838 at peace with his death, Henry took great pity in the empty man

lying next to him. Henry could see the sadness and fear in his eyes as death drew ever closer. Deleted: laying

John lived a lonely life devoid of meaningful experience. At thirty-two he married a woman he

could not love and had a child he could care less about. Like Sisyphus pushing a boulder up a

hill, John’s life fell in a never ending cycle of labor at the iron factory. Every day when he Deleted: Everyday

returned home he would lament the life he was given and the roommate he was supposed to love.

At night when he laid in a loveless bed he would light a cigarette and imagine a life where he

was a writer or maybe an artist or a folk musician. Yes, he would be a folk musician like the

great Bob Dylan. He would sing lovely ballads that would make him famous all across China

and he would be on stage with a harmonica and a guitar and he would be called the voice of his

generation.

These fantasies that he had no courage to chase made him feel all the more hollow and

cowardly. At forty John’s wife gave up on living her loveless life and died. John felt no remorse Deleted: the

or sadness after her death, only anger as he would now have to look after his son. John gave as

2
little attention to his son as possible. As the years went by John would not even acknowledge his

son and spent all his time when he was not working sitting on his porch smoking and hating

himself. At fourteen John’s son left his father and moved to Hangzhou to get a job in a shoe

factory. It took John almost a month to realize his house was empty and when he did he smiled.

“Little bastard finally left,” John laughed through a puff of cigarette smoke.

As he laid in room 838 fearing his inevitable death, John was filled with jealousy.

Something about Henry’s content with death made John fume with anger. Had John not been so Deleted: full of jealousy for Henry.

weak, he would have gone outside to grab a stone to beat Henry to death with. John turned to his Deleted: John

right and saw Henry smiling as he read the Bible.

“Why do you look so goddamn happy about dying,” John threw aggressively at Henry.

Henry carefully marked his place in John Chapter 3, placed his Bible on the nightstand to

his left, looked Henry in the eyes, and said gently, “There’s nothing for me to fear. I’ve lived my Deleted: placed his Bible carefully on the nightstand on his
left, looked John directly in his eyes, and said gently
life. I’ve accomplished everything God sent for me to accomplish. I’ve lived a long happy life, I

found a loving wife, I had four children that all found spouses, and my family with thrive for

years to come. I know that it is my time to die. My father always told me it was rare for someone

to live older than seventy. Here I am seventy-three can you believe it. God made us mortal for a

reason, there’s no reason to push against his plan. He has given life meaning”

“You really think some invisible man in the sky gave this fucked up world meaning. I

knew you were a jolly fool, but I didn’t know you were a fucking idiot. Nothing here matters, it’s Deleted: its

all some sick fucking joke. There is nothing here but emptiness. No joy. No happiness. No love.

Nothing. It’s all some grand illusion,” John replied forcefully.

“If you believe that you will die a sad death.”

“Like there’s such thing as a happy death. No death can be happy. It’s fucking death.”

3
 “Yes, dear John, there are happy deaths. When I die, I will be filled with love and joy.” Deleted: Yes
Deleted: I will die a happy death filled with love and joy.”
“I can’t wait to see you die, just so I can see how fucking happy you are then.”

Henry annoyed with his roommate picked up his Bible, flipped to Matthew Chapter 14, Deleted:

and continued reading. John looked up at the moldy ceiling and thought about what Henry had

said. Henry’s experiences with life made John realize how empty he was. There was not one

memory he could recall where he was truly happy. He had no meaningful experiences, no

meaningful relationships, and found no one to love him. He had not done anything with his life

besides scorn what he was given. John then began to think about the terrible life he lived.

He wondered where his son was. He wondered if he was married. He hoped he was

married. He hoped his son was able to find happiness. He remembered his wife. He remembered Deleted: He remembered his wife.

the night they were married and how eager she was to love when they returned home and how he

turned his cold shoulder to light a cigarette and how he ignored his naked bride all night. He Deleted:
Deleted: for the whole night
thought of how big of an asshole he was. He thought about how nice it would be to start his life

over again, knowing what he knew now. He knew exactly what he would do now. He knew he

would buy a guitar and harmonica and follow the footsteps of Bob Dylan. He would find true Deleted:
Deleted: become the Bob Dylan of China
love, true happiness and would be content with his death like Henry was.

As these thoughts swirled through his head John began to cry. He cried for the life he

lived, and he cried for the life he could have lived. John cried because he was alone, and no one Deleted: lived
Deleted: alone
would care when he was dead. He would just be another gravestone in the cemetery without

flowers. John felt the walls of room 838 closing in on him. He could no longer escape.

For two days John and Henry sat in solitude, not a sound in the room other than John’s

occasional frightful tears. Each night Henry would close his eyes and would hope that when he

4
opened them he would see the face of his loving wife. John could not close his eyes. He feared

death now more than ever. He could not accept the fact that he was going to die.

That night Henry closed his eyes and with a smile spread across his face died peacefully.

The nurses came in and wheeled his bed out of room 838. John became filled with fear, sorrow,

envy, and anger when he saw the content spread across Henry’s dead face.

One of the nurses bent over John’s bedside and said, “I’m sorry that Henry died. Is there

anything I can get for you?”

“Just get me a cigarette,” John replied.

“Sir, you can’t smoke you have lung cancer.”

“Just get me a fucking cigarette. I’ve been trapped in this room for fucking months. I just Deleted: of death

want a goddamn cigarette. What the fuck do you care if I die. You would give two shits if I died.

You’ll probably be fucking happy when I die.”

The nurse pulled a half empty pack of cigarettes and a matchbox out of her pocket, tossed

them to John with pity and left John to die alone. John lit up a cigarette took a puff and forgot for Deleted: be

a fleeting moment that he was bound for death.

John wallowed in his misery for another week in room 838. He had smoked all but one of

the cigarettes the nurse had given him. Though he knew he would die, he could not accept his Deleted: Thought

reality. His mind still fluttered with the possibilities of what his life could have been. He wished

he could have been Bob Dylan. If only he could start over. If only he was not such a coward. If

only he could have gone out and lived how he wanted to live.

As the light of dawn spread across the impermanent concrete buildings of Shanghai seen

faintly through the window of room 838, a black crow landed on the windowsill. This was it.

5
Death had finally come to take what was left of this empty man. John with his hands trembling Deleted:
Deleted: to reap what had been sown
lit a cigarette and prayed to a god he never knew for a little more time.

6
 Reflection on The Death of an Empty Man

Death has long been something that I have intensely feared and struggled to come to

terms with. The uncertainty of what happens after one closes their eyes for the final time causes

me tremendous anxiety every time I think about my own death. Recently, I have been exploring

the concept of death and finding meaning in a seemingly meaningless world through the readings Deleted: finite life

of existential philosophers such as Jean-Paul Sartre, Martin Heidegger, and Albert Camus. When

I was presented with this writing prompt, I immediately began searching for academic articles

that would allow me to explore human nature in regard to life and death. I quickly found an Deleted: in regards to

article written by sociologist Mui Hing June Mak, titled Accepting The Timing Of One’s Death:

An Experience Of Chinese Hospice Patients, that peaked my interest. In the article Mak presents

her findings, based upon interviews with thirty-three patients at a hospice care center, on what

can help patients dying of terminal illness accept their death and what contributes to what is

viewed as a good death. Mak notes living a meaningful life, fulfillment of social obligations,

religions, and connectedness as being key factors in people being able to accept their deaths.

With this being understood, I sat on the information for a night in order to digest the findings and

try to establish a deeper overall meaning. I came to the conclusion that Mak was stressing how

important it is to live one’s life to the fullest. Deleted: The conclusion I came to was that Mak was
stressing the overall importance of living one’s life to its
fullest. …
After I understood what Mak’s article was truly about, I knew that I wanted to translate it

into the genre of a short story. Short stories have long been my favorite genre of writing and I

greatly admire the short stories of Ernest Hemingway and John Steinbeck. In order to begin

translating Mak’s article into my own short story I first had to consider the audience, purpose,

and genre conventions of short stories. What I found is that short stories can appeal to an

incredibly wide audience. Literary critics and novice readers alike can enjoy short stories

7
because of their condensed and straight forward nature. While the audience of a short story vary Deleted: short

widely, they all expect the same thing: to be entertained. This requires the writer to make stylistic

choices that hold the interest of the reader. Secondary to entertainment, writers often seek to

comment on some particular aspect of society or problem they see. Famously, The Gift of the

Magi by O. Henry commented on poverty and what it means to be wealthy, while holding

readers interest through the telling of the lengths a young couple will go to express their love.

Writers can go in many different directions as they seek to keep their audience entertained and

also interject their own commentary. This artistic freedom makes specific genre conventions

extremely difficult to pin down. The only conventions of short stories that I could see across the Deleted: Because of this it is difficult to pin down specific
genre conventions that are applied to all short stories.
spectrum are narrative style, characters, and of course short length. Outside of these, writers have Deleted: pin down
Deleted: is
complete freedom to tell their stories as they wish. Deleted: the
Deleted: the need for
The audience, purpose, and genre conventions of short stories contrast starkly with those

of academic articles such as Mak’s article. Academic articles are geared towards others within

academia or those who are highly educated and are not widely accessible to the average person.

They are written to inform and educate about a given topic and are under no obligation to Deleted: about

entertain the reader. This results in the genre conventions of academic articles are extremely Deleted:
Deleted: Because of this,
formal. Academic articles have highly technical language, use evidence to support their writers’ Deleted: writers

claims, and have formal paragraph structure.

These inherent differences between short stories and academic articles presented me with

many challenges in translating Mak’s article. I had to find a way to convey the academic

information Mak provided in an entertaining narrative form. I knew it would be impossible to

convey all of the information Mak gave in an entertaining way, so I decided to narrow down the

article into only what I viewed as essential information and what I needed to include in order for Deleted: that I had to use in my short story in

8
the translation to keep the essence of the article. I then had to decide what the plot of my stories Deleted:
Deleted: its essence.
would be. I thought that it would be fitting of Mak’s article to tell the story of two men dying in

hospice care, one dying a good death and one dying a bad death. Through these characters I

hoped to show the reader aspects of what constitutes a good death and how a person can become

more accepting of their deaths. Henry, the character experiencing a good death, is accepting of

his death because he lived a meaningful life, fulfilled his social obligations, had religion, and was

connected through his family. John, the character struggling to come to terms with death, acts as

a foil to Henry and lacks all factors that Mak states help one to accept their death. John lived an

empty life, did not have any meaningful experience, was not religious, and had a connection to

the world as a whole. It is not until his interactions with Henry does he realize how he failed at

life and he began to imagine what he could have done different. The character of John I

specifically used in order to make clear the message about living life to its fullest that I got from

Mak’s article.

While adding more detail from Mak’s article to my short story would have helped the

reader understand how Mak came to her conclusions, the purpose and conventions of a short Deleted: While I would have loved to include more
information from Mak’s article outside of her main points
story restricted me. I had to make my short story interesting and I had to give my story logical Deleted:

narrative flow, both of which I likely would not have been able to do had I included more Deleted: make my story flow narratively
Deleted:
information from Mak’s article. However, I did try and sprinkle in some of the other details in Deleted: would would have been harmed had I included
more information from Mak’s article
minor ways. For example, in Henry’s dialogue with John he mentions his father said people

rarely live to be older than fifty. This directly comes from Mak’s article as she explains what is

viewed as a proper age to die. I also made the setting of my story consistent with Mak’s article

and had it take place in a hospice care center.

9
 In the course of writing my short story, I frequently considered Ernest Hemingway’s Deleted: Something I thought about
Deleted: while writing my story is
iceberg theory. The iceberg theory is a style of writing where details are intentionally hidden, not

stated directly, or not elaborated upon. I found this theory to be helpful in my translation and

allowed me to feel comfortable not stating Mak’s information directly in my story. I instead

stylistically intertwined the information with the characters to indirectly give my readers the

information from Mak’s article. I also utilized this theory to develop the complexity of the

characters. Through my description of how John could not love his wife and how I later

described their wedding night, I was trying to get the reader to see John as a gay man. John being

gay adds another dimension to his character and helps to explain why he has such scorn for the Deleted: to the reader

life he was given.

Through the course of writing this translation, the most profound challenge I faced was

finding ways to accurately use the information Mak gave about Chinese culture. I found it Deleted: The most challenging part of the translation of
Mak’s article for me was using the information she gave
about Chines culture in my story. I found
extremely difficult to understand and write on Chinese culture as I have never experienced it
Deleted: right

firsthand. I was able to integrate Mak’s detail on how finding marriage for one’s children is an

important social obligation in China through the character of Henry. All of Henry’s children are

married and that leads him to conclude that he has accomplished all that he was supposed to. Deleted: he wants to accomplish

Outside of this I sprinkled in a few references to China and its geography. I will be the first to

admit, however, that this story is not an adequate representation of what Chinese culture

involves. I would have felt significantly more comfortable using the valley of California or Ohio

as the backdrop for my story, but I felt that I had an obligation to stay true to Mak’s article and

use China.

One liberty I did take with Mak’s article was the Anglo-Saxon names of the two main

characters. Mak did not provide any names of the people she interviewed, so I was left with the

10
responsibility of naming the characters. I contemplated using traditional Chinese names, but I

ultimately landed on Henry and John because I wanted to connect the characters to other literary

and cultural figures. I took Henry’s name from Fredric Henry, the main character of

Hemingway’s novel A Farewell to Arms. While Fredric Henry was not the basis for the character Formatted: Font: Italic

of Henry in my story, I feel the characters are related in their acceptance of death and shared

experience of their wife’s dying before they do. I named the character struggling with accepting

death John because of the inspiration I took from Father John Misty’s song Ballad of a Dying

Man. The song centers around a man who spent his whole life critiquing other people’s opinions

only to realize as he approaches death that nothing he did really mattered. I used this song as the

model for the revelation that John had in my story when he realizes how he lived a meaningless

life. To pay tribute to this I took the name John from Father John Misty.

Through my translation of Mak’s article I have come to a better understanding of how

genre dictates how information is conveyed. The genre of academic articles conveys information

in a much different way than short stories do, even if the information is the same. I also realized

how much freedom there is to write in a specific genre. When writing my short story, I was Deleted: story

amazed with how many stylistic and artistic choices I was free to make. Genre did not restrict me

to a specific format of storytelling. I could go in any direction I wanted to and that allowed me to Deleted: strict

write the story that I wanted to write. My ultimate hope in writing this story, consistent with

what I took from Mak’s article, is that the reader is inspired to live the life that they want to life

and not waste it as John did in my story. Life is too precious to waste.

1. Is there anything you don’t understand in the translation?

Formatted: List Paragraph, Numbered + Level: 1 +
2. From the reflection did you understand my process? Numbering Style: 1, 2, 3, … + Start at: 1 + Alignment: Left
+ Aligned at: 0.5" + Indent at: 0.75"
Deleted: not to enjoy and live to its fullest.
Formatted: Font: (Default) Times New Roman, 12 pt
Formatted: Font: (Default) Times New Roman, 12 pt

11
 Works Cited

Mak, Mui Hing June. “Accepting the Timing of One's Death: An Experience of Chinese Hospice

Patients - Mui Hing June Mak, 2002.” SAGE Journals,

http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.2190/WVJQ-96WD-5DJJ-F5CU. Formatted: Font: (Default) Times New Roman, 12 pt

The Gift of the Magi. Paw Prints, 2009.

“What Lies Beneath: The Iceberg Theory of Writing.” Poynter, 25 Nov. 2014,

https://www.poynter.org/reporting-editing/2005/what-lies-beneath-the-iceberg-theory-of- Field Code Changed

writing/.

Hemingway, Ernest. A Farewell to Arms. Grosset & Dunlap, by Arrangement with Charles

Scribners Sons, 1931.

Father John Misty, “Ballad of the Dying Man.” Pure Comedy. 2017 Formatted: Line spacing: Double

12