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Sandra Carrillo

Professor Ditch

English 115

December 09, 2019

Final Reflection

Throughout the years of writing from what started off as sentences to larger assignments

like essays there has always been room for change. As the expectations of professors are

gradually changing as the years go by, students are then learning from their past mistakes to

better their writing. Each essay has a set of requirements that are meant to be reached through

our developed power of critical thinking. The effort that I have put into my assignments resulted

in the improvement of my writing. Thus, my change was possible because of my ability to

connect back to the thesis, syntax, and diction. In addition to learning from my own mistakes I

visit the Learning Resource Center which gives me a second helping hand with advice to

improve skills necessary for university level learning.

Project Space was one of my first huge assignment, bringing on pressure for a well done

essay. Although I did not reach all of the criteria after revising I noticed my supportive evidence

writing did not properly connect back to the thesis. The goal is to remind the reader of what you

are talking about with the intention of persuading them. In the unrevised version of ​Two

Different Spaces ​as incorrectly stated, “Allowing the space for growth through your well-being

and having the ability to change your perspective”, ended without a relation to space in the

thesis. The thesis mentions how each author is able to use either internal or external space to gain

happiness. Thus the unrevised quote of my concluding sentence ended vaguely without relation
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to the main point of the essay. The revised essay of ​Two Different Spaces ​correctly states “

Through internal space you are given room for growth through your own well being and the

ability to change perspective on a negative situation to a more positive outcome.” The supporting

evidence must be made to back up the thesis in which it proves a point towards the end of the

sentence to support, defend, or explain the statement. Without the full circle ending the sentence

is left unfinished or vague, after revisions my essay is more clear and well structured. Through

which I was able to recognize the mistake and revise the unclear aspects of each concluding

sentences that ended without proper connection.

There are moments when writing on a topic was very self explanatory as well as

moments where it takes a little more effort but through each assignment something new is

learned. Syntax and Diction have always been an aspect of writing that I have always lacked.

The words in my head tend to sound better than what my hands are typing down. Learning from

my past mistakes I gained a trick which helps me improve my writing, reading each paragraph

out loud leading to a verbal way to catch any grammatical mistakes. Attending a one on on LRC

meeting also helps me get a different look on my essay than my own, which helped me greatly

for more advanced peer view of my essay. The unrevised version of the Project Text essay ​The

Positive Outlook ​incorrectly states ​“​ Learning from his father, eagerness to know more, he

comes upon an opportunity, a casting in a play that allows him to shine the light of politics of the

past into the present to make a difference, step by step.” The statement leaves the reader to notice

the incorrect use of commas as well as information. After rereading out loud or double checking

each requirement I am given a better idea of the direction I want to persuade. In addition, in the

revised essay of ​The Positive Outlook a​ s restated “ Learning from a book did not compare to the
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knowledge that his father knows, eagerness to know more, he comes upon an opportunity, a

casting in a play that allows him to shine a light on the politics of the past into the present to

make a difference step by step.” Proper diction and syntax change the over all clarification of the

sentences, allowing for a smooth transition from one sentence to the other. In conclusion,

through the constant lack of improper syntax and diction I was able to gain tips to change that

situation, in which learning from my mistakes I was able to grow as a writer.

As the years go by I continue to grow and learn from my writing, understanding where I

went wrong and bring it to my understanding on how to fix it.. Just as I began the semester with

unsatisfactory writing in which I wanted to expand from leaving the class with satisfactory work

with a chance of a higher expansion. In order to reach all of my essay requirements I have to

look at the essay piece by piece rather than an overview not only focusing on thesis restatement,

syntax, and Diction but as well as the perspective of the reader. Persuading the reader to your

essay instead of confusing them by writing. All the aspects of an essay whether grammar or

commas play a huge part in an essay, after acknowledging the mistakes I was able to improve

and reconstruct my unsatisfactory essays to Satisfactory ones.

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Works Cited

Carrillo, Sandra A. ​Unrevised:Two Different Spaces.​ 2 Oct. 2019. California State University of

Northridge, Northridge.

Carrillo, Sandra A. ​Unrevised: The Positive Outlook​. 4 Nov. 2019. California State University of

Northridge, Northridge

Carrillo, Sandra A. ​Revised: Two Different Spaces.​ 9 Dec. 2019. California State University of

Northridge, Northridge.

Carrillo, Sandra A. ​Revised: The Positive Outlook​. 9 Dec. 2019. California State University of

Northridge, Northridge.