areComp

COMPETENCE DEVELOPMENT FOR CARERS

AND EDUCATORS OF CHILDREN IN FOSTER
CARE IN THE CONTEXT OF TRANSITION FROM
INSTITUTIONAL TO COMMUNITY BASED CARE

Training
material
FOR CARERS, EDUCATORS
AND FOSTER PARENTS
 CO NTENT S

UNIT I. – Behavioral problems and disorders . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5

I.1. The most frequent behavioral problems and disorders
among children in the child protection system. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 7
I.2. Dealing with children’s/adolescents’ behavioral problems, disciplining. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18
I. 3. Conflict and conflict resolution techniques . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25
HANDOUTS to UNIT I.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28

UNIT II. – Prevention and intervention of burnout . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 35

Introduction. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36
II. 1. Stress in everyday life. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 38
II. 2. Stress in the workplace. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50
II.3. Stress management. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 63

UNIT III. – Cooperation and communication with the biological family. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 77

III.1. The child’s attachment to the biological family. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 79
III.2. The perspective of the biological parents. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 87
III.3. Promoting a good relationship between the child and the biological family. . . . . . . . . 95

UNIT IV – Trauma and crisis in the life of children in foster care . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3

IV.1. Introduction trauma-pedagogy . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 103
IV. 2. Creating a saver environment. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 108
IV. 3. Ways of relieving traumatical memories . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 110

UNIT V. – Learning difficulties and learning motivation . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 117

V. 1. Learning Difficulties / Disabilities / Disorders . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 120
V. 2. Helping a child with a learning disorder. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 124
V. 3. Learning motivation . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 132
HANDOUTS to UNIT V.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 140

Project with agreement no. 2014-1-RO01-KA204-002757

This document ref lects the views only of the authors, and the Education, Audiovisual and Culture Executive
Agency and the European Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the infor-
mation contained therein.
 UNIT I.
Behavioral
problems
and disorders

ƒƒ THE MOST FREQUENT BEHAVIORAL PROBLEMS

AND DISORDERS AMONG CHILDREN IN THE
CHILD PROTECTION SYSTEM
ƒƒ DEALING WITH CHILDREN’S/ ADOLESCENTS’
BEHAVIORAL PROBLEMS, DISCIPLINING
ƒƒ DEALING WITH AGGRESSION, CONFLICT
RESOLUTION TECHNIQUES

Source: pixab ay.com

U N IT I . BEHAVIOR AL PROBLEMS AND DISORDERS

LEARNING Participants will acquire knowledge about the most frequent behavioral problems and dis- I.1.
OUTCOMES orders among children in the child protection system. They will gain better understanding
so they can recognize the reasons for the behavior. They will learn efficient techniques The most frequent behavioral problems and
for disciplining and resolving conflicts, and they will become able to know where to seek disorders among children in the child protection
help if necessary.
system
COMPETENCIES conflict resolution
TARGETED analyzing and solving problems
thinking and acting creatively
being able to make compromises
verbal and non-verbal communication LEARNING Participants get to know the most frequent behavioral problems and behavioral
building good relationship with children OUTCOMES disorders among children and adolescents in the child protection system. They will
recognizing the needs of others be able to make difference between behavioral problems and behavioral disorders
methods for disciplining effectively with clinical significance. Participants will be able to identify those cases, when pro-
fessional help is needed.
TIME FRAME 8 teaching hours
CONTENT ƒƒ Problems about fitting in among new people, traumas
METHODS/ exchange of experience, short theoretical lectures, role-playing exercises, small group DESCRIPTION
ƒƒ Behavioral problems in adolescence /alcohol, drugs/
ACTIVITIES assignments
PROPOSED ƒƒ Behavioral disorders, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, pathologies

ƒƒ Conflict in the family resulting from the child’s behavior

MATERIALS/ textbook, video material, handout, flipchart
MEDIA NEEDED ƒƒ Defense mechanisms

TARGET GROUP educators, carers, foster parents TIME FRAME 2 teaching hours

METHODS/ Short theoretical lectures, small-group assignments, exchange of experience, dis-

ACTIVITIES cussions, hypothetical situations, role-playing exercises.
PROPOSED

RESOURCES handout, flipchart, projector, computer

NEEDED

NUMBER OF 15 participants
PARTICIPANTS

The care and education of children entered into the child protection system is a highly specialized area
of pedagogy. Effective work requires the presence and constant development of various special skills. This
chapter focuses on the conduct-related issues and most common behavioral disorders that may arise in
the case of children taken into institutional care. Throughout the chapter we will provide an overview of
the issues of conduct arising from special life situations, the most common psychiatric issues, and behav-
ioral issues during adolescence among children in the child protection system. We will also deal with the
possible conflicts these behavioral issues may cause within the foster family or children’s home.

6 7
U N IT I .  |  BEHAVIOR AL PROBLEMS AND DISORDERS
To what extent can something be considered normal?
Based on international research it can generally be said that psychiatric vulnerability and the develop-
ment of any such disorder affects 6 to 25 percent of pre-adolescent and adolescent children (depending
on their age and gender). Among children of schooling age, 7-8 percent can be diagnosed with some sort
of mental development disorder. In clinical terms, the behavior and symptoms of children are compared
to the assumed ’normality’ of their gender and age group. A significant deviation from this normality is
one of the main criteria of such a diagnosis.
In case of the majority of adult psychiatric patients, certain symptoms of their illness had been causing
significant issues in their day-to-day lives even before they reached the age of 18. It is therefore imper-
ative that children and adolescents exhibiting psychiatric symptoms receive appropriate care in a timely
manner in order to prevent their symptoms from becoming embedded and later developing into a more
serious psychiatric disease.
It is strictly the job of psychiatrists and clinical psychologists to determine whether the behavior of
a child should still be considered normal, or as a symptom of a mental disorder. If there are difficulties
arising in the conduct of a child, it is advised to consult with a psychological expert (the psychologist of the
foster parent network, children’s home, school, or that of the educational advisor). The expert is able to
help better understand the child’s behavior, and to evaluate the need for an examination, possible hospi-
talization or medicinal therapy, as well as long term psychotherapy. They can also provide valuable advice
regarding the possible correction of the child’s behavior.
Unique characteristics in the case of children taken into the
child protection system
So far we can see that mental disorders are prevalent even among children raised by their biological fam-
ilies. Those taken into the guardianship of the child protection system are exposed to a number of harmful
influencing factors and suffer trauma during the period before their admittance into institutional care. These
factors make them even more susceptible to developing one or more of several psychiatric disorders. Howev-
er we must also consider that separation from the family is a great trauma for every child and can cause pain
that manifests itself in the form of behavioral issues without the presence of any sort of mental disorder.
Harmful factors in the lives of children in institutional care
EXERCISE 1.
Ask the participants to form small groups and collect the most common behavior-influencing fac-
tors experienced by children and adolescents under institutional guardianship. Ideas should be noted
in the form of keywords on the available flipchart. Also draw their attention to the fact that these
factors can arise during the period before and after birth, as well as during the start of institutional
guardianship and over the course of a temporary guardianship.
Make sure to outline the below factors throughout the discussion:
Harmful influencing factors before birth:
–– prenatal harmful period, inappropriate lifestyle of the mother (smoking, alcohol or drug abuse,
unhealthy diet)
8 9
The most frequent behavioral problems and disorders among children in the child protection system
–– unwanted pregnancy, possibly even kept secret à lack of care, has an effect on the mental-physical
development of the child, as well as the development of the nervous system responsible for behavior
Harmful influencing factors after birth:
1. Neglect: physical/mental/emotional
Physical neglect: above the direct harmful effect, it causes significant tension and a sense of uncertainty
Mental neglect: many things are not learned by the child, in which case their shortcomings are not a
result of a mental disability, but of the lack of socialization
Emotional neglect: leads to bonding issues, where the child can’t or won’t form bonds or show feelings
of love or, conversely, forms overly tight bonds with everyone
Consequences of neglect: in case of a loose personality structure education the child does not
receive appropriate points of reference to adhere to, and is not familiarized with the boundaries along
which he can navigate; the probability of engaging in criminality increases; the child has no example show-
ing him to care for other people, as the child himself was not cared for
2. Physical abuse, aggression: causes anxiety, frustration, and often counter-aggression; abused chil-
dren are highly irritable, don’t respond well to frustration
3. Inconsequent parental behavior (e.g. due to drugs or alcohol): at times they provide everything,
while at times they are irritable and impatient. This spawns feelings of total uncertainty in the child, which
often is the cause of acting out.
4. Showing a misshapen model: the child will grow accustomed to the environment present within the
family, and will later consider it as normal behavior
The trauma of being taken into care:
–– Separation from home: Considered a loss, even if the home environment was inadequate and the
child was not treated properly. The child is disappointed in their parents, starts blaming him/herself,
and feels uncertain as to exactly what lies ahead. Everything will change around them, bringing new
rules which are not yet familiar.
The trauma of institutional care:
–– Uniformization: The child is constantly together with others, making proper personality develop-
ment more difficult. This may lead to seeking attention by means of deviant behavior.
–– Stressors: Strictness, enclosure, discipline, order à these result in a constant need to conform,
which is mentally challenging, may cause sudden outbursts
–– Rivalry: children develop a hierarchy, in which keeping their status often requires struggling
–– Stigma: “I am an institutional”. Thoughts behind this: “it must be because I behaved badly” à if I am
bad to begin with, and was thrown away, I will continue to behave in this way. This identity is picked
up by the child.
–– They only live in the present, often detaching themselves from the past because of the painful
memories and refuse to think of their families. As the future is uncertain, they can’t anticipate what
awaits them and are left without a visible outlook on life or any firm roots.
U N IT I .  |  BEHAVIOR AL PROBLEMS AND DISORDERS
Extraction from the biological family is a serious experience of loss
The 5 stages of coping with pain (grief)
– Shock, awe, evasion, rejection: reluctance is often present in the child at this stage. They try to stop
the loss from happening, or deny it even happened. Smaller children cry frequently during this stage.
They refuse to face domestic issues, and cry to have someone take them back home.
– Haggling: Children often experience strong feelings of guilt and believe the painful loss can be avoid-
ed by means of some sort of deal or compromise. They often think: “I was bad, that is why they took me
away from mom and dad. E.g.: perhaps it was because I was fighting a lot with my brother”
– Expression of anger: Furious, hostile behavior. At this time they fail do acknowledge that the loss has
in fact occurred and cannot be undone. It is much easier for children to hate their foster parents than
their real parents. In this stage it is important to help them express their anger and to treat it properly.
Exhibiting behavior destructive towards themselves and others is also common in this stage.
– Depression: anger is still present, but begins to fold inwards rather than outwards
– Compassion and the successful treatment of pain.
When coping with pain people go through all five stages, but may stay in one stage for a considerable
amount of time (possibly for years) or even lapse back into a lower stage. The order of the five stages of
coping with loss is not strictly applicable in case of all individuals.
Integration issues
Those suffering from integration, learning, and behavioral difficulties are children who significantly
underperform compared to their age based on the opinion of the committee of experts. They face
issues with human connections and relationships, as well as shortcomings in learning, behavior control,
integration into communities and an overall much more difficult personality development. However, they
are not considered to be children in need of special care. Integration and behavioral symptoms can be
grouped into two categories: 1. Introverted, more depressive forms of behavior. 2. Hostile, aggressive
behavior, violent conduct, disobedience, banter and attack. This chapter will focus on the latter group of
symptoms.
Behavioral difficulties can stem from biological factors, the harmful influence of a social environment,
or a combination of both. In order to solve the issues we must find the underlying causes and apply cor-
rectional education (correction of mistakes) to successfully modify these difficulties.
EXERCISE 2.
A child’s behavior has been showing serious issues since his separation from his family. He is dis-
obedient and refuses to abide by any rules. He also has trouble integrating into the group. He uses
foul language, often abuses his peers, and is generally aggressive towards adults and fellow children
alike. At times he has outbursts of rage for no apparent reason and even damages surrounding ob-
jects in doing so. Let’s think: what could be the root cause of the child’s behavior? How could we
assist in his integration?
Background of the child’s behavior:
–– freshly admitted to institutional care: the child feels pressured by the burden of experiences in his
past life
–– experience of loss and grief due to separation from family (most children don’t want to leave their
10
The most frequent behavioral problems and disorders among children in the child protection system
families even despite the inadequate treatment): anger, hostile behavior
–– does not feel safe in the new life situation à feels powerless, angry, and afraid
–– problematic stress management: aggression is projected onto foster parents and other children
–– can’t find his place in the new life situation / group hierarchical organization
–– it might be the case that certain behavioral patterns have been taught at home that helped cope with
abandonment and violence, however these patterns are unacceptable and destructive to society
–– the child’s integration becomes more difficult if the expectations, habits, and norms present in the
group are very different from those the child had been used to before
–– previous example: tension and conflict was handled by means of aggression
What should be done to help the child’s integration?
–– bonds have a highly important role in the development of behavioral symptoms and their manage-
ment in the future
–– let the child feel that they and their feelings are accepted unconditionally
–– even the negative ones, which can be channeled e.g. arts, sports, a named pillow, stress ball
–– do not ban negative emotions, but rather educate to express them in an appropriate and accept-
able manner
–– define logical, clearly understandable rules appropriate for the child’s age
–– approach them with patience: accept the fact that it takes time for the child to integrate into the
new environment and to understand the new rules and habits that come with it
–– strive to uncover and understand the ulterior motive behind the child’s behavior
–– recognize the time to ask for help
–– keep in mind that the chronological, emotional, social, and sexual age of abused and neglected
children may vary
–– in case of anger, always look for the underlying emotional trauma
The child’s inherent norms and habits
EXERCISE 3.
The behavior of a child freshly admitted to the group/family heavily deviates from the norm. He
often steals from his foster parents/educators and other children, and has no respect for others’
property. If he wants something, he will obtain it even through means of violence. His conflicts are
usually resolved by resorting to physical aggression. His foster parents/educators/carers are aware
that his parents have a criminal record. Let’s think: what could be the underlying cause of the child’s
deviant behavior? How could we help the child abandon these behavioral patterns?
What could be the cause of this behavior?
–– the set of values accepted within his biological family deviate from the norms accepted by society:
it can happen that families whose members have experienced incarceration adhere to a different
set of values (e.g. attitude towards stealing) à in such cases the child has difficulty understanding
why their behavior is wrong, since they used to receive praise by their biological family for actions
which are now frowned upon
–– lack of norms and reference points: if the child used to live in an inconsequent environment with
constantly changing expectations à he has not developed a reference point which can be used to
determine the correctness of his actions
11
U N IT I .  |  BEHAVIOR AL PROBLEMS AND DISORDERS
–– he was neglected and did not have an adult model: Example: if one of the parents suffered from
substance abuse: the parent’s behavior is unpredictable, always dependent on their current mood
and state of mind, confusion between what deserves praise and punishment à the child is there-
fore unable to learn a strict set of values
How can we help the child in the correction of this behavior?
–– do not condemn the child because of the incorrect habits and behavioral patterns he is used to, as
these are often the result of a rigorous path he has had to endure in his life
–– instead create a safe, positive ambience and entice him to learn the new set of habits and values
–– do not threaten or punish him, as this spawns resistance and undermines the bond with the child
–– approach him with unconditional acceptance, which should not depend on his actions
–– children are mostly used to the fact that adherence to rules is always relative, and judged on an ad-
hoc basis (it rarely happens that actual consequences are incurred)
–– it is therefore imperative that foster parents and child supervisors take their own part in adhering
to and enacting the rules of the group/family
–– the quality of the treatment provided for the child and their family by the professional may not be
influenced by the parents’/guardians’ willingness to cooperate, nor their lifestyle, social-economic
status, ethnic origins, or behavior
–– sometimes the child’s behavior and conduct make acceptance and cooperation difficult on behalf
of the professional à it is therefore important to gain the deepest possible knowledge and under-
standing of the life history of the child, making it easier to appropriately respond to inadequate
reactions
–– as these children react sensitively to unpredictability, it is important for foster parents/guardians/
child supervisors to harmonize their behavior with their verbal and metacommunication
Conflicts arising from the child’s behavior within
the foster family
EXERCISE 4. Imaginary game
Imagine that you disembark from a plane and are left on an island surrounded by the ocean. The
country, culture, and language are all completely unknown to you. Your survival depends on the
people living there, but you are not familiar with the laws of the island. What are the feelings you
would experience in this situation?
When a child is placed into a new family, everything is new, unfamiliar, unknown, and therefore utterly
frightening. It is similar to the experience of travelling abroad without language knowledge, and therefore
not understanding what is happening around us, and not knowing the expectations of other people as we
do not understand each other’s language.
EXERCISE 5.
Imagine that a new foster child arrives into your family. You were able to establish a really
good relationship with the child right at the very beginning. In the weeks after his arrival, he
acts as the “perfect child”. However, over time you begin to notice he is becoming more and
more disobedient. He does not respond to your requests (“You are not my mother! You can’t tell
12
The most frequent behavioral problems and disorders among children in the child protection system
me what to do!”), and exhibits aggressive behavior. He damages his toys on purpose and throws
a tantrum whenever his wishes are not fulfilled. Despite your best efforts to treat the child with
love and discuss the incorrectness of his conduct, there is no noticeable change in his behavior.
Furthermore, over the past couple of days you noticed that some money has gone missing from
your wallet.
Your other family members are becoming increasingly impatient regarding the child’s behavior,
and this has also become a regular source of conflict between you and your significant other.
What are the thoughts that would come to your mind in such a situation?
What could have caused this shift in the child’s behavior?
How would you handle the situation?
PAGE
During the discussion use Assistance 1 found in the handout. 28
EXERCISE 6.
List the different types of typical behavioral changes that can be observed upon a child’s entry
into a foster family/children’s home group. Let’s discuss what might be the cause of these changes.
1. constant overeating: on one hand it is a consequence of starvation, but it also carries a mental signal:
to gather as much love and attention as possible
2. hiding objects (often seen as stealing): lack of a developed understanding of the “mine-yours” con-
cept, and also seen as a material manifestation of love
3. regression: exhibiting behavior inconsistent with his age, e.g. sucking on their finger, bedwetting.
Mental signal: a craving for the pleasant act of simply doing nothing as a child, since he is unable to
cope with the new expectations
4. seeking attention: tantrums, aggression, stealing, lying. Foster parents can be frightened by such
behavior, however these can eventually be eliminated with the help of patience and consequent
guidance.
Behavioral disorders, pathologies
In certain cases the behavioral issues exhibited by a child are not caused by an integration disorder
(which is eliminated as a result of adequately loving, careful, patient and consequent education), but rath-
er some sort of mental disorder. As mentioned previously, a significant deviation from normality in the
child’s behavior, emotions, way of thinking or mental abilities is present in these cases. Determining the
degree of deviation, and whether the issue will solve itself over time, or there is a need for professional
help in the form of diagnosis and treatment is a difficult task. A team of professionals can offer great help
in answering this question in cooperation with foster parents, carers and educators. However, if the
visible change in behavior is long lasting or permanent, the involvement of an adequate expert is highly
recommended.
What exactly is a psychic disorder?
 all four of the below characteristics are present at the same time to some degree in relation to
the symptoms
 behavior: deviant, dysfunctional, dangerous to oneself and others, causes distress
13
U N IT I .  |  BEHAVIOR AL PROBLEMS AND DISORDERS
EXERCISE 7.
Give examples of each of the four characteristics and let’s discuss what they mean exactly.
–– Deviant behavior: behavior disregarding socially acceptable norms, values, e.g. stealing
–– Dysfunctional: makes it hard for the person and those directly surrounding them to live a normal
life or cope with everyday situations e.g. the child refuses to stay calm and still at school, keeps leav-
ing their place during classes, cannot keep up with the pace of the class, loses focus, and therefore
performs badly in school
–– Dangerous to oneself and others: e.g. behaves aggressively, often gets into fights with others
–– Causes distress: Despite the fact that the child is bothered even by their own behavior, they are
unable to act differently. e.g. child has no intention of harming others, yet still reacts with outbursts
of aggression if something is not to their liking
Experts weigh all of these factors and utilize a commonly accepted diagnostic system when defining
the diagnosis of a particular child. It is nearly impossible to generally speak about the treatment of children
suffering from psychiatric issues, as it is not only the specific nature of their issues, but also their individual
differences that warrant a custom treatment for each individual (especially if the issue has been untreat-
ed and present for a longer period of time). Due to length constraints we are unable to deeply analyze
every single type of behavioral disorder that can occur in children. However, we will now cover the most
common pathologies that can only be treated with the help of a qualified expert.
1. Dissocial symptoms:
These are symptoms caused by frustration, conflicts, various harmful influences, and incorrect edu-
cational methods. It is important to stress that while the appearance of any of the symptoms requires
additional care, they are not a clear indication of the child’s behavior becoming antisocial over time.
They can be altered by changing the environmental influences and applying appropriate psychotherapy.
The common factor among them is rebellion against social norms, and they are caused by some sort
of psychosocial trauma. They occur quite frequently in the case of institutionally cared children.
A. Aggression: the aim of the behavior is to purposefully inflict damage or pain. It can be traced back
to the period between 1.5-3.5 years of age, when the small child reacts to frustration with aggression. If
the parent always fulfilled the wishes of the demanding child, he will take this as a sign of reassurance and
continue using this method to get what he wants in the future. However, it is also fairly common in the
case of children whose parents often punished them with the withdrawal of love.
Short-tempered behavior or outbursts of anger are usually caused by some unpleasant phys-
ical-mental situation, over which the child has no control (hunger, tiredness, latent disease, men-
struation, fear, sadness). It can also be an educational error: unfair reproach, mocking, punishment,
excessive strictness, blocking the child’s will, or physical abuse.
B. Constant lying: It is important to distinguish this from so-called “fantasy-lying” which is present
during kindergarten years (and sometimes even afterwards). It usually stems from an emotional disruption.
Lying is the intentional alteration of reality, with the aim of purposeful deception. It is not consid-
ered lying unless conscious and aimed to deceive.
Bühler groups lies into 3 categories
1. Antisocial lies, which are aimed at intentionally damaging someone for personal gain
14
The most frequent behavioral problems and disorders among children in the child protection system
2. Asocial lies, which are aimed at gaining an advantage without damaging others
3. Social lies, which are committed out of courtesy, tact, or in the interest of someone else
We do not acknowledge the act of lying before 5-6 years of age, as the child is yet unable to
distinguish between the objective and the subjective. The child uses fantasy to explain incompre-
hensible situations.
Lying in childhood can be caused by a fear of punishment, physical abuse, or a craving for
forbidden pleasures. During puberty, it can be caused by feelings of uncertainty, being ashamed
of feelings towards the other gender, exaggeration, self-consciousness, or showing off. In case of
young adults it can be explained by reasons similar to those of adults. Incorrect education, exces-
sive strictness, or the presence of an inappropriate role model can also encourage lying.
Compulsive lying requires the help of a qualified professional.
C. Stealing: if the aim of the action is not to seek material gains, it is often done in order to obtain
love. In case of small children, stealing is manifested by taking smaller objects in order to fulfill of an infan-
tile craving for pleasure. This can easily be restored with an adequate educational process. Older children
seek to fill in an emotional gap when stealing objects or money.
D. Wandering: During adolescence a lighter form of this behavior is completely acceptable and should
be perceived as a search for adventure or wanting to become more independent. In case of younger
children it should be seen as a sort of defense mechanism, during which the child wishes to escape from
emotional conflicts caused by negative life events.
E. Arson is also a possible behavioral issue. We are aware of children’s “love of fire”. Youngsters do
it out of carelessness, and occasionally vengeance, while psychopaths and mentally disabled children light
things on fire out of passion.
2. Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder:
This is one of the most common behavioral disorders during childhood, which occurs much more
frequently among boys. It is a complex combination of symptoms involving attention, movement, and
impulsiveness. General characteristics include quick temper, inattentiveness, and hyperactivity. A constant
need for disjointed movement (which even the children themselves don’t understand). Their actions lack
any form of order, organization, or sense of danger. They are quick to grab anything, their hands and feet
move constantly, they talk constantly, and come across as annoying to most people. This sort of disorder
usually stems from an issue within the nervous system.
This behavioral pattern is an obstacle of making academic progress and the development of friendly
relationships.
Assistance 1.
–– Advice for those raising hyperactive children
–– The issue can also manifest without hyperactivity in the form of an attention disorder. This will be
PAGE
further elaborated when discussing the topic of learning disorders. 28
Assistance 2.
–– If the child’s conduct is “bad”
–– What are the behavioral patterns that require the help of a qualified expert?
15
U N IT I .  |  BEHAVIOR AL PROBLEMS AND DISORDERS The most frequent behavioral problems and disorders among children in the child protection system

Behavioral issues during adolescence –– involving the individual in their preferred activities in order to alleviate their craving towards drugs
–– holding drug prevention workshops as a preventive measure
Opposition, disagreement with adults
Turning against adults is a natural occurrence in all children at a certain age or developmental stage, Pregnancy
and in certain situations. This is especially true during adolescence, where it is an important component It might happen that during the time spent at the children’s home or just after arrival the adolescent
of personality development and the process of becoming an adult. Opposition provides an opportunity informs us that she missed her last period, or failed to use protection during sexual intercourse. As a first
for an individual to test their limits and competencies during conflicts with their environment. To a certain step we should determine whether this is in fact caused by pregnancy or some sort of gynecological issue.
degree it is therefore a stage of personality development. However, above this degree it is considered an If we have ascertained the fact of pregnancy, we must inform the individual of the options available to her:
obstacle (Popper, 1988). As stipulated by the criteria of the International Statistical Classification of Dis- the interruption of pregnancy, or keeping the child (nurse, psychologist). As the interruption of pregnancy
eases and Related Health Problems, it is only opposition that consists of permanently hostile, negativistic, requires parental consent, the parents must be informed about her decision. If the parent rejects their
attacking, and conflict-seeking behavior inappropriate for the child’s age that can be considered as truly child’s decision and does not consent to the abortion, it is possible to request a temporary custodian from
problematic. the child support authority if the child is over 14 years of age. It is the fundamental right of the child to
Possible causes: make decisions about their own life, even including pregnancy.
– During ages 2-4 and puberty it is a natural developmental process, a sign of becoming independent
– inadequate education: excessive pampering, excessive strictness, inconsequential environment
– other harmful environmental influences: bad role model, bad family life, an imperfection of the
parents due to which the child is unable to respect them (abuse, alcohol), divorced or divorcing
parents turn children against each other
– an innate propensity (bad adaptive capabilities)
– disease, chronic state (encephalopathic personality disorder, psychopathy)
– frequent punishment, too little praise
– setting unstable expectations towards the child
– a complete environmental change (different habits, ambience, norms)
– monotonous and very little impulses and experiences (living on a farm, in a closed community)

Escaping and wandering

Escaping and wandering off can have several meanings, and should be considered in conjunction with
other symptoms. It can just as well be a sign of a personality development disorder, as a normal reaction
to unbearably difficult living conditions. While it provides the child with a feeling of freedom, it has several
negative consequences. Children who escape from home remove themselves completely from adult
supervision, often join gangs and become accustomed to their deviant behavior. Wandering is considered
compulsive if it happens suddenly, without thought, due to an irresistible craving, and the child has diffi-
culty remembering what happened. Avoiding school is a consequence of escaping and wandering. The
primary action varies in case of every individual.

Drug abuse:
EXERCISE 8.
A youngster with serious drug issues is placed in the group. Think about the adequate course of
action in such a case.
–– finding the appropriate medical treatment for possible withdrawal symptoms
–– finding out the causes and nature of the addiction
–– promoting participation in a rehabilitation program
–– providing an accepting and supportive environment

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U N IT I .  |  BEHAVIOR AL PROBLEMS AND DISORDERS Dealing with children’s/adolescents’ behavioral problems, disciplining

I.2. a certain degree of discipline, which can be difficult to attain. The child’s integration into the family or an
institutional community (kindergarten, school, foster home) often occurs through conflicts. A supportive
Dealing with children’s/adolescents’ behavioral environment providing emotional security is essential to the child’s personality development, and also acts
as a catalyst in the development of disciplined behavior.
problems, disciplining
Types of undisciplined behavior
Aggression (verbal and physical)
Violation of ethical norms (stealing, cheating, lying, etc.)
LEARNING Participants will learn to recognize and interpret the underlying motivations behind
OUTCOMES the child’s behavior. They will be able to distinguish between disciplining and punish- Challenging the authority (power?) of the foster parent
ment while learning effective disciplining methods. They will learn how to present Disturbing family events (talking, wandering about, throwing objects, etc.)
ideas clearly and to the point and how to act consistently. They will learn about „switching off” (dreaming, fooling around, other activities, etc.)
the importance and role of unconditional acceptance, emotional support, and the
As we saw in subunit 1. trauma endured due to disadvantaged or multiply disadvantaged circumstances
objective evaluation of a situation. They will learn about the importance of being
can lead to mental disorders and a slower pace of development. Through individual education and care,
able to process past experiences, and how that can promote positive self-image.
the characteristics and behavior developed during the process of socialization can be altered, improved,
and further developed. Change can be achieved through the active and positive participation of the child’s
CONTENT –– Recognizing the reasons and motivation for a certain behavior (examples)
environment. It is the job of the foster parent to prepare the child for the acceptance of norms within
DESCRIPTION –– Differences between disciplining and punishment
society and the family, making the treatment of behavioral issues one of their most important concerns.
–– Effective disciplining techniques and methods
Through their work, foster parents provide a form of compensation by filling in certain gaps caused
–– On becoming a qualified foster parent/educator/carer, establishing a therapeu-
by different shortcomings. They also have a correctional role when helping cope with developmental gaps
tic environment
and errors. The combination of the two activities forms a very complex process.

TIME FRAME 3 teaching hours

METHODS/ short theoretic lectures, exchange of experience, role-playing exercises, small
ACTIVITIIES group assignments
PROPOSED
RESOURCES handout, flipchart
NEEDED
NUMBER OF 15 participants
PARTICIPANTS
Dealing with children and adolescents in the child protection system requires a high degree of empa-
thy, social sensitivity, and openness, problem solving skills, and loving care.
During the care of children it is mainly their biological needs that are being fulfilled through a positive
attitude. However, education means much more than this. In addition to providing the fundamental ex-
istential needs (shelter, nutrition, clothing), an environment for proper physical, mental, and social devel-
opment must also be present. Apart from an appropriate attitude on behalf of the parent/educator and
a healthy, impulse-rich environment, this also requires a harmonic environment full of positive emotions,
which is a result of educational methods and tools aimed at reaching clearly thought out, planned, and de-
fined goals. Predictability, balanced circumstances, and the controlled functioning of the family are all pre-
requisites for the manifestation and development of the child’s abilities. Providing these factors requires
EXERCISE 1.
Let’s define what disciplining means to each of the participants. Give some examples of what you
do when disciplining someone. In light of the answers provided, let’s think about the below theoret-
ical overview.
According to the Pedagogical Encyclopedia, discipline is defined as “the adherence to the rules neces-
sary for peaceful coexistence and cooperation within society, which are the products of moral habits or
simply a prior agreement”. Therefore undisciplined behavior means the violation of norms, and overall
inappropriate behavior. It is these sorts of behaviors that we wish to change through disciplining. As it
acts as a preventive measure to inadequate behavior, the scope of its content is narrower than that of
education. However, the tools applied are very similar, and have the primary purpose of teaching the child
to learn the appropriate norms, values, and behavioral patterns resulting in self-discipline.
Disciplining does not equal punishment. Punishment is a tool for disciplining, which should be given
a lot of thought and utilized only when absolutely necessary. Prohibition and punishment only further
aggravate the child and spawn feelings of resentment. Instead of the preferred behavior becoming em-
bedded into the behavioral inventory, it causes an opposite behavioral pattern. It also undermines the
relationship between the child and their guardian, as well as credibility, and provides a basis for a feeling
of hostility.
In order for the educational efforts to be successful, a positive connection is required between the
child and the educator/ foster parent. Getting to know the child greatly aids this process. To be able to
efficiently react to the child’s behavior, we must know what was the motivation behind it, and what they
wanted to achieve with the behavior. If you are familiar with the child’s system of needs, you will capable

18 19
 U N IT I .  |  BEHAVIOR AL PROBLEMS AND DISORDERS
of being more empathetic and applying tools and methods that are appropriate for the child’s custom
needs. It also enables you to motivate and reward the child, which helps foster a good relationship and a
strong bond, eventually resulting in changed behavior.
What are the needs of a child?
The system of needs can be grouped into three categories:
– biogenic
– bpsychogenic
– bsociogenic
PAGE (Optional) You can find the Assistance according to this topic in the Handout (Assistance 1.). By using
30 the assistance, think about the fulfillment of these certain needs in the point of motivation or disciplining.
Based on our experience, it is the self-image and self-assessment of institutionally cared children that is
the most vulnerable. This is directly connected to their losses and unfulfilled needs. In order to achieve a
positive change in their attitude, integration, adaptation, and problem solving skills we must unravel their
experiences and their system of needs.
As a foster parent/educator, the evaluation of the child’s behavior is an almost continuous task. The
adequate selection and application of appropriate feedback techniques is therefore imperative when
maintaining the guardian’s influence over the child. It is also essential for the child to feel that the guardian
stands firmly behind them despite the hardships and conflict situations. This is of utmost importance,
and must span throughout all of the child’s experiences. The feeling of unconditional acceptance forms a
fundamental and inseverable bond in case of blood relatives. In case of foster children it can go hand in
hand with a feeling of uncertainty that can be brought to the surface by an unexpected conflict situation.
Although conflicts must always be dealt with, a sense of basic acceptance must also be provided.
Life comes with changes. These can damage our established habits and traditions, and can force us to
change our norms and expectations, which can cause conflicts. Successful integration requires behavior
that promotes adaptation. However, a guardian must learn to determine how this can be best achieved.
The establishment of habits and changing inappropriate behavior is a gradual process requiring practice
and consequent feedback.
EXERCISE 2.
Group work. Ask the participants to rely on their own experience to share examples of conflict
situations with children. The instructor should select the most adequate examples to be elaborated
and analyzed. After selection, discuss how these conflict situations should be handled.
Below is an auxiliary template, which can be used to guide the conversation.
Discussing the following methods based on personal experience:
– physical contact: teaching children while they sit on your lap, or gently caressing them with your
arms
– non-abusive communication
– focuses only on inappropriate behavior, doesn’t evaluate the child’s personality as a whole
– tries to promote the appropriate behavioral pattern out of the child’s behavioral inventory
– uses positive wording, builds on the child’s abilities
20
Dealing with children’s/adolescents’ behavioral problems, disciplining
– reasoning, unraveling cause-and-effect
– open and honest communication both verbally and non-verbally, avoiding communicational obsta-
cles, asking open-ended questions
– understanding attention, broadcasting messages about self-image
– express yourself clearly, don’t say what they can’t, but rather what they can do
– raise their interest
– keeping limits, respecting the personal space of the child
– experiencing consequences
To strengthen the child’s self-assessment it is necessary to express your positive impressions about
them. Although critical, it is not enough to simply communicate these. They must also be felt, believed,
and therefore credibly represented. It is useful to know and accept that neither is the child, and nor are
we considered infallible.
What should we not expect when disciplining?
Immediate results
Conflict-free coexistence
Complete honesty
Reactions favored by everyone
Disciplined behavior can be achieved by raising the child’s interest and gaining their attention rather
than sanctioning them.
Through social teaching, it is our task as a foster parent to solidify and deconstruct certain forms of
activity. As a result of this process, the child’s personality will develop their hierarchy of habits, which can
be reached by means of interaction.
Another form of social learning is model learning, which is based on mimicking and provides children
with examples on how to lead their lives.
A third method of social learning is learning based on the interpretation of experiences and the cog-
nitive processing of information. This helps children develop their own systems of norms through the
interiorization of the restructured versions of previously experienced norms.
EXERCISE 3.
Provide examples of all three of the above categories.
In order to be efficient as a guardian or foster parent, our work must be entirely conscious. The below
list provides assistance in rethinking and modifying our own opportunities and those of our surroundings.
(The instructor should now distribute the handouts to the participants)
The following psychological needs are of great importance in case of children extracted from their
biological families:
EXERCISE 4.
Participants should form groups of 3 and discuss why the following factors are of fundamental im-
portance in education (Every group should analyze two factors). As a reminder, participants receive
a handout containing the elaborated factors at the end of the exercise (Assistance 4.)
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 U N IT I .  |  BEHAVIOR AL PROBLEMS AND DISORDERS Dealing with children’s/adolescents’ behavioral problems, disciplining

Regularity disciplining education, this will be achieved with a sense of dissatisfaction. In case of non-disciplining ed-
PAGE
30 Gradation ucation the parent will be unable to reach disciplined behavior despite the warmth and understanding
ambience provided. This will result in a lack of independence and therefore self-control.
Consistency
The appropriate educational method within the family:
Guardian behavior Order, establishment of clear limits, applying confidence and kindness, parental leadership, involving
The example the child in the establishment of rules to a degree adequate for their age and abilities, cooperation, choice
Disciplining of behavior is the child’s responsibility (freedom)
Educating to be independent Incorrect goals causing inappropriate behavior in children:
The child chooses to behave badly in the hope of receiving a sought-after recognition.
Physical training and sports
Types (by ascending order of severity):
Games and entertainment 1. Seeking attention
Educating to be self-disciplined 2. Power struggles
3. Vengeance
4. Passive resistance
Changing behavior requires the following steps:
Planning and execution of shaping behavior
Requires precise planning:
EXERCISE 5.
– which behaviors we want to change Recall problematic situations from your experience that are in line with the above-mentioned
PAGE
– clearly define what is the adequate behavior categorization. Think about the feelings that were spawned by these situations. How did you cope 30
– evaluate all of the negative influencing factors (unclear rules, friendly relationships, etc.) with them? (Assistance 5.)
Execution plan: the time, reason, and exact type of reinforcement

Characteristics of disciplining
Until the children learn to do it themselves, we define the limits within the family or foster home when
disciplining.
Children are responsible for their own behavior, as it was their decision to act in a specific way.
The child must be aware of the applicable rules within the family or home, as well as the consequences
of breaking them. Consequences should be defined in advance, and should be in line with the severity of
the committed actions. We should also discuss them with the child and check whether they understood
or not.
Good behavior always has its rewards, while bad behavior always has negative consequences. This
must be represented consistently.
Suffering the consequences is not punishment. It is always the child’s choice to act in a particular way,
and they must bear the responsibility of its consequences!
Types of education
– Authoritarian education, where the guardian educates based on their position of power, using forc-
ing methods, and expecting unconditional obedience
– Permissive education, where the guardian expects nothing, and does not wish to shape the child in
any way
– Democratic education
Confident and disciplining parental behavior combined with an accepting attitude that promotes inde-
pendence will result in a self-disciplined, satisfied, independent, and responsible child. In case of a strictly
What do we feel?
Seeking attention -frustration
Power struggles – feeling of losing control
Vengeance – we feel hurt
Passive resistance –feeling powerless
What should we do?
Talk to the child – confront them with their own objectives
In case of attention seeking we shouldn’t react when being provoked. We should praise the expected
behavior. If provoking is impossible to not notice, issue a warning to the child.
Power struggles must be avoided!! The whole family or group must be involved when handling the
issue. It can help if we provide responsibility to the child struggling for power.
Vengeance is the hardest to deal with, as it is rejected by family members and peers. The child be-
comes hostile, disregards the consequences (considers them just another reason for revenge), is in need
of understanding and acceptance. Family members and the whole group should be involved in order to
integrate the child into their community.
In case of passive resistance the child wants us to believe that they are hopeless. Excessive expecta-
tions, ambitions, or competition could be the underlying cause. This must be unraveled, and you should
never give up! Even the smallest effort needs to be recognized! (“So far, so good!”).
It is critical to listen to the child when disciplining. Let’s not forget that the parent disciplines the child
even by just being present, and their behavior and attitude towards the world will be copied by the child.

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U N IT I .   BEHAVIOR AL PROBLEMS AND DISORDERS

Children often exhibit symptoms of the issues and distress of their parents in their behavior. It is there- I. 3.
fore extremely important for the foster parent/educator to consciously participate in the disciplining
process. It is only by understanding and correctly assessing the processes that we can aid the child in their
integration, and the process of becoming an adult.
Conflict and conflict resolution techniques
There should be at least one person around the child with whom they can speak honestly, open up
about their feelings, and form a confidential relationship.

LEARNING By improving the level of self– knowledge, participants become able to react more
OUTCOMES consciously and professionally. They will be able to act and react on the basis of
self-reflection. Participants learn adequate techniques of conflict management, and
they will be able to help children finding their strengths.
Participants will be able to identify those cases, when professional help is needed.

CONTENT –– Reasons of and dealing with aggressive behavior

DESCRIPTION –– Types of conflicts
–– Effective methods for conflict resolution
–– Win-win situations
–– Non-aggressive communication
–– Meaning of disciplining
–– Setting age-compatible rules
–– Good and bad expectations
–– Recognizing emotions in ourselves evoked by the child’s feelings and behavior

TIME FRAME 3 teaching hours

ACTIVITIES short theoretic lectures, exchange of experience, small-group assignments

PROPOSED

MATERIALS/ handout, flipchart

MEDIA NEEDED

NUMBER OF 15 participants
PARTICIPANTS

The word “conflict” comes from the Latin word “confilgere”, which means “armed battle”. Today it is
used not only to define conflicts on battlegrounds, but during everyday life as well.

Conflict can be destructive or constructive towards personality. In case of destructive conflicts, the
parties of the conflict have such a deep disagreement that it results in the further degradation of their
relationship rather than its harmonization.
It is therefore paramount to treat conflicts correctly and consciously in child education as well as all
other areas of life, which is not an easy task.

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U N IT I .  |  BEHAVIOR AL PROBLEMS AND DISORDERS Conflict and conflict resolution techniques

Stages of the conflict process The process of conflict resolution in child education
1. Root cause situation
2. Recognizing conflict What is the method of conflict resolution that avoids defeat? The solution has to be acceptable for both
3. Establishing the adequate method of conflict management parties. A child feels more motivated to execute a decision, which was made with their contribution, especially
4. Actual behavior during the conflict if it is built upon their own idea. Especially in the beginning, this method requires lots of time, but in the long
5. Consequences run control will become unnecessary along with questioning. The six steps of the method are the following:
1. Unravel and define the conflict (we need to win over the child in this stage, let’s clearly state that
we are looking for a solution).
How an individual behaves in a conflict situation depends 2. Brainstorming for a solution (the more the better, but be cautious to not consider any idea a bad
on several factors one at this stage).
3. Considering all recommendations (the parent should have a clear stance as well).
– the general characteristics of their personality (self-esteem, attitude, etc.); 4. Deciding in favor of the best, mutually acceptable recommendation (don’t make the decision final,
– their current emotional state; just “give it a try”)
– the ambience in which the conflict manifests itself (accepting, tolerant, or judgmental, etc.); 5. Practical execution (agreement in specific practical questions, timelines)
– characteristics of the situation (public or private, expected or unexpected); 6. Follow-up evaluation (are both parties satisfied, is there a need for modification)
– the nature of the relationship between those involved in the conflict (superficial or intensive, hostile As trust is key, no form of punishment may be put into perspective. Of course, there are situations where
or friendly, etc.); there is no time to discuss, and an immediate decision must be made (e.g. in case of an emergency or illness).
– the quality of the intentions and motivation of the conflicting partner (supportive or harmful)

How can we behave in case of a conflict? EXERCISE 2.:

aggressively – with violence, aggravation, bitterness The parent arrives home from work tired in the evening. The house is a complete mess, and the
assertively – seeking cooperation, requires self-validation and self-recognition child has not studied or completed any homework. Despite this, he is about to leave to meet with
submissively – acting evasively his friends. Participants should form small groups and create a plan based on the above-mentioned
aggressive: ex cathedra declaration, retaliation stages of conflict resolution.
restrictive: organize, control, demand, restriction
inertial: powerless, weak, just lets things happen Conflict resolution (in order to reach negotiations)
indifferent: emotionally unconcerned, seeking equality, stays out of the situation 1. Confronting conflicting viewpoints
cooperative: understanding, handles the situation well 2. Commonly defining the conflict (What is the problem? Gordon: Whose is the problem?)
3. Exhibiting emotional state
Conflict resolution techniques: 4. Exhibiting the will to cooperate/Mediation-contract
1. Evasion 5. Putting ourselves in the other’s shoes
2. Force: winner-loser game 6. Reaching an agreement
3. Adaptation: submissive, subservient Phases of problem solving
4. Seeking compromise 1. Orientation phase: Unraveling the background of the issue, conditions of finding a solution, planning
5. Problem solving: confronting further steps
2. Diagnostic phase: defining and analyzing the issue
3. Action plan
EXERCISE 1.: 4. Action phase: execution
The participants should imagine the following scenario: Your 16 year old adolescent daughter falls 5. Evaluation phase
in love and decides to spend the night with her significant other, who she met just a few days ago.
You believe this is too early and want to keep it from happening. This leads to a serious quarrel, in
which your daughter threatens to escape from home if you do not give her permission. Discuss how
EXERCISE3:
you would react in this situation using the conflict resolution techniques outlined above. In the remaining time, ask the participants to share their most definitive experiences in relation
to the subject. Analyze the experiences in light of what they have learned so far with the help of
the trainer.

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U N IT I .  BEHAVIOR AL PROBLEMS AND DISORDERS

HANDOUTS to UNIT I. and it takes time for him to be able to trust the parent to such an extent that he is capable of actually
loving them.
–– Neglected children have quite a few shortcomings. In order to compensate for these, it is some-
times necessary to treat them as if they were a bit younger than they actually are. When fulfilling
Handouts to I.1. their needs, do not focus on the fact that another child of similar age would be able to cope with-
out any issue.
Behavioral problems and disorders. –– If the foster parent is disappointed by the child’s behavior, it may very easily spawn the feeling that the
The most frequent behavioral problems and child was unable to live up to expectations. If the child experiences this frequently (especially if it is
coupled with the withdrawal of love) he will start exhibiting reactions that further fuel this dissatisfac-
disorders among children in the child protection tion as a defense mechanism.
system Assistance 2.
Advice for those raising hyperactive children:
–– do not immediately punish the child
Assistance 1. –– if the child is punished for things outside of his control, his need for constant movement is blocked,
Assistance for foster parents: which can result in the appearance of severe behavioral issues in the future as the child develops a
Thoughts often occurring in foster parents sense of guilt, followed by unrest and rage
–– Why is the child stealing from me? I have been raising him for months so he can see that I pro- –– instead let him channel his need for movement through different activities (playing outside, sports)
vide him with everything… (In this case we should think through all previous mental trauma –– only familiarize him with a few rules at a time, further expanding them gradually
suffered by the child as well as the set of norms and values present in his previous family and –– a hyperactive child feels safe if the adult has a strict, yet understanding and constant presence
be patient.) –– it is very important for a hyperactive child to be able to reach easily attainable goals quickly, followed
–– I provide him with everything yet he is still disobedient/aggressive and causes damage on purpose… by direct positive feedback, and a steady progression towards the positive goals set out by himself
(Anger towards foster parents can have several different root causes. It is often the case that negative which express freedom of movement and the cohesion of the community
feelings towards the child’s real parents are projected onto the foster parents, as they are currently –– reward good behavior and the fulfillment of agreements (expression of love)
in the parental role. In such cases foster parents need to realize that in reality these emotions are not –– never apply physical intimidation
addressed towards them.)

Changes in the child’s behavior after placement in the new family: Assistance 3. – the child’s behavior
1. Reluctance to make new connections on behalf of the child can be observed in the period directly If the child’s conduct is “bad”, it might be worth thinking:
following placement. –– Is this behavior comfortable for the child?
2. This is followed by a period when the child wants to fulfill all expectations. –– What could be his goal with this behavior?
3. The challenge: This period is about finding limits. The child seeks reassurance as to whether he is really –– Is it detrimental or dangerous to him or others?
loved, accepted, and can surely stay in the family. He will seek to find out what he is and isn’t allowed –– Is there a need for an immediate change or can we provide time for the transition?
to do, and exactly where the limits are. He wants to find out if he is loved even if he does something –– What is the child’s background?
wrong. This is the opposite of the previous stage in the sense that the child behaves worse than he ac-
tually does, while all the time observing the foster parent. What lies in the background is that his own What are the behavioral patterns that require the help of a qualified expert?
parents have once disappointed him, and it would be much too painful to relive such an experience –– severe introversion
with the foster parents. –– inadequate or inappropriate behavior (laughing, crying, tantrums without any reason)
4. Stabilization: If the foster parent shows empathy, patience, and love towards the child, his behavior will –– lack of normal relationships with children of the same age, lack of interest in children of the same age
eventually stabilize. However this takes time, meaning as long as 1.5-2 years in certain cases. –– lack of responsiveness towards other people
–– lack of a healthy sense of fear, or presence of abnormal fears
Advice: –– hearing or seeing non-existent things
–– As the foster parent treats the child with uttermost love and kindness from the very beginning, it is –– communicative competence fails to develop, or ceases after development
completely natural to feel that they should be rewarded with a reciprocal feeling of love. However, –– non-communicative speaking
this requires patience. The foster child has supposedly gone through many different types of trauma

28 29
U N IT I .  BEHAVIOR AL PROBLEMS AND DISORDERS
Handout to I.2.
Dealing with children’s/adolescents’ behavioral
problems, disciplining
Assistance 1. (Optional)
The system of needs
1. Biogenic needs are innate, and are universally applicable to all individuals (need for nutrition, need for
movement, need for rest, the need to play, the need for diversity, the need for mental activity, the need for
accomplishment)
 As these are needs of fundamental importance, their withdrawal results in a degree of frustration that can
permanently damage the relationship. Therefore they cannot be used as a form of punishment. The need to
play and the need for diversity are exceptions, which can result in a positive behavioral change when limited.
Biogenic needs are often used as a form of motivation (e.g. Sweets and fruits as rewarding and encouraging
 ones can permanently damage it. When performing tasks, subjective feelings and experiences are more defin-
tools, or improving a monotonous activity by implementing some sort of movement or diverse task. However,
overloading such needs can result in tensions with a detrimental effect.)
2. Psychogenic needs, which are important for purposes of motivation: intellectual needs (the need for
intellectual activity, the need for new information and knowledge, the need for construction); aesthetical needs
(the need for experiences and creation, the need for the reproduction of aesthetical phenomena); the need
for diversity; the need for spectacle; the need for freedom; the need for order and collection; the need for
accomplishment; the need for material gain; the need for professional activity; the need to fantasize; the need
for sensation; the need for fun and entertainment; the need for inside tension.
These needs can be used effectively for motivation. The need for intellectual activity draws attention to the importance
 valuable.
of actively involving the child when solving problems in order to obtain new knowledge. Knowing the need for diversity
is valuable when managing work or tasks. The need for collection is useful in case of tasks requiring data collection
(e.g. life history books), while the need for inside tension acts as encouragement in sport activities and the creation of
competitive scenarios.
3. Sociogenic needs are not innate, but develop as a result of environmental and pedagogical influences. The
most important factors of establishing relationships are: habits, life path models, system of convictions
The more developed the individual’s personality, the firmer the habits, and the more sensitive they are to
their frustration. As an established habit is hard to get rid of, demanding its suspension or elimination will not
yield results.
Life path models appear in adequate forms of activity. The individual has a strong bond with certain forms
of activity, and considers them an important element of their life. If for example they are a successful athlete
or musician, and tailor their lifestyle, daily agenda, and the quality of their activities to suit this profile. The treat-
ment of a life path model requires great empathy, compromise, and problem solving skills. We must find a way
for the child to be able to practice their rightful endeavors and thoughts about leading their life.
As they are the most deeply embedded, endeavors to modify their convictions can cause the greatest
feeling of resentment within the child. The system of convictions, which is the group of ideological convictions,
is of the highest order, and contributes to important, life changing decisions. Once this system has developed,
30
its manifestation and protection has a significant role in defining the child’s behavior. Turning against these
convictions can be a source of disagreement, which can undermine the relationship. The foster family needs
to satisfy the ideological expectations of the child and their biological family, which can result in a collision of
norms. Therefore, handling such situations requires a high degree of tolerance, empathy, and resourcefulness.
It is advised to avoid such disagreements right at the beginning, or solve them from a professional viewpoint,
which also results in broadening knowledge.
During the formation of connections, the individual’s convictions about their own self are also definitive.
Every person develops a self-image, which is always positive in case of a healthy personality. Receiving a negative
evaluation of one’s whole personality spawns great frustration, which can be detrimental to their self-image.
This can also have an undermining effect on human connections. It is therefore inappropriate to come to a neg-
ative conclusion about the child’s personality based on a single behavioral pattern. When building a relationship,
it is much more effective to focus on the positive, and grasp a positive element of the child’s self-image.
The self-image develops based on the individual’s appearance and their achieved results. Although we are
aware of our shortcomings, it is the dominance of our advantageous physical appearance that defines our
self-image, which is overall positive.
Positive remarks regarding physical appearance can strengthen the relationship, while ironic and negative
itive, which can result in overvaluation. It is only after a certain period of time that the objective becomes just
as important. Therefore the evaluation of problematic behavior requires great tact and valid reasoning. Oth-
erwise the child will assume viciousness, a deliberate degradation, and an overall inclination towards negativity.
In terms of motivation, the most important sociogenic needs are:
The need for altruism, the need for fairness, the need for patronage (helping the one in need), the need
for pleasure, the need for companionship, the need for exchange of opinions, the need for cooperation, the
need for friendship, the need to control others, the need for protection, the need for love, the need for com-
mon entertainment with others, the need to stand out, the need for prestige, the need to be in the center of
attention, the need for adherence to social norms, the need to preserve personal dignity, the need to become
In order to motivate the child for a certain activity the needs that are important to them must be fulfilled,
or the opportunity of fulfilling them must be provided. Motivation has the opposite effect of frustration,
as it enables the fulfillment of individual needs instead of blocking them, and implements the need into the
process of performing the given task. It therefore becomes attractive to the child and enables it to have a
positive developmental effect. The child will lose motivation if their need for accomplishment, need for new
information, and need for mental activity is violated. For instance, this can occur if they experience constant
failure at school.
Assistance 2.
What should we not expect when disciplining?
–– Immediate results
–– Conflict-free coexistence
–– Complete honesty
–– Reactions favored by everyone
–– Disciplined behavior can be achieved by raising the child’s interest and gaining their attention rather than
sanctioning them.
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U N IT I .  BEHAVIOR AL PROBLEMS AND DISORDERS

Assistance 3. pendence, especially when catering to their every wish. Punishment can come in the form of withdrawing
pleasure, games, fun, food, or love (cold behavior and communication), shaming (standing in the corner,
The cornerstones of conscious education kneeling, mocking), frightening (threatening, or locking into a dark room or cellar), and many forms of phys-
1. The presence of a developed, reasoned set of educational goals, and human image. What are the results ical abuse (by hand, wooden spoon, belt, or stick). Any form of physical threatening is wrong, as it frightens
I want to achieve? What kind of adult do I want my child to become? and shames the child. It can make the child timid, stubborn, reserved, and sad, or even vengeful.
2. A wide inventory of activities, availability of adequate professional help / Providing an elaborate, diverse 7. Educating to be independent. We can promote the child’s development by giving them tasks appro-
ground to foster connections with adults and peers. This prevents destructive activities done out of priate for their age, making them accustomed to being more independent. We can also help by aiding
boredom. them in becoming an adult, and providing the degree of freedom adequate for their age, while acting as
3. The importance of involvement and integration into family activities a safety net beside them. Additionally, by letting them make mistakes and discover the reasons behind
4. Activities encouraging cooperation, constant communication, evaluative interactions and common deci- them, and how to avoid them in the future.
sions. 8. Physical training and sports. Apart from contributing to their physical development by strengthening
5. Providing opportunities to make decisions, during which they can experience consequences, and the them, it also teaches them to be disciplined and persistent. It also strengthens their will and self-esteem.
importance of opinions. Don’t just let things happen to the child, but make them an active participant of It activates passive children, calms unrestful ones, and provides a means of channeling anger for the
the processes. more aggressive ones.
6. Establishment of a communication framework within the family/group, which allows the discussion and 9. Games and entertainment. Apart from giving pleasure, it also educates effectively. It develops both fine
analysis of direct or indirect experiences. and greater movements, memory, and logic. Engaging in such positive experiences together strengthens
7. The role of the guardian and their expectations. Primarily cooperative-communicative behavior. the bond between the child and the guardian. Games can also provide an opportunity for learning new
8. By recognizing educational situations, providing affirmative/rejective feedback, and through proper in- knowledge, the importance and application of rules, and coping with the fact that (for instance in the
teraction, the guardian/foster parent can influence the development of the child’s personality, system case of board games) you can’t always win. The child can therefore learn how to deal with and accept
of norms, behavior, and inventory of habits. This is fundamental, as it prevents unconcerned, conflict failure. Role playing games provide an opportunity to develop appropriate behavior.
avoiding guardian behavior. 10. Educating to be self-disciplined. It starts at a very early age, when the child has to give up or defer the
fulfillment of a certain wish based on the request of the parent. The goal is to enable them to moderate
their actions and emotions for the benefit of a community and put their individual emotions, wishes, and
Assistance 4. interests aside when they become adults.
The important factors of education
1. Regularity. Adherence to a daily agenda appropriate for the child’s age provides a predictable environ-
ment, which prevents unrest, peevish behavior, as well as eating and sleeping difficulties.
Assistance 5.
2. Gradation. Children can only adapt gradually to changes. Disciplining the child – Fundamentals of encouragement (handout)
3. Consistency. The child can only learn to adapt if the education is consistent, clearly defining what is ac- –– Be positive! –– Promote independence!
cepted and what is not. Lack of this creates uncertainty. Of course, consistency does not equal an overly –– Encourage the child not to be perfect, but to take –– Believe in the child’s abilities!
strict attitude. In some exceptional cases (in case of illness, tiredness, unrest, pains, or during puberty) it a step ahead! –– Help the child break down obstacles!
is required to adapt to the situation. –– Value the effort! (not the performance) –– Express your joy/pride towards their
4. Guardian behavior. The behavior of the guardian should be calm, balanced, honest, and harmonious. –– Concentrate on the strengths! performance!
Calm, in the sense that they should not be irritated or impatient with or around children, and should not –– Teach children to learn from their mistakes! –– Be optimistic and enthusiastic!
expose them to quarrels or shouting. Balanced, in the sense that the way of treating the child should not
be sudden, or changing without reason. Honest, in the sense that the child should not catch them lying
or breaking a promise, as this spawns feelings of distrust, suspicion, and makes the child more introvert-
What shouldn’t we do?
ed. Harmonious, in the sense that the family should not have a tense ambience exuding excitement, but –– Don’t make children compete or compare –– What stands in the way of discipline?
one that acts with understanding, love, and unselfishness towards each other. them to each other! –– Negative expectations. Excessive expectations
5. The example. It is the most effective educational tool for children. At first they are influenced by the –– Don’t suggest that the child could be much better! cause distress.
family environment (primarily the mother, father, foster parent), and later by the professionals at the –– No „buts”! –– Thinking that our expectations will hurt the child.
institution. An inappropriate example can cause behavioral disorders. –– Do not scold the child! –– Being afraid to seek the help of a qualified pro-
6. Disciplining. Disciplining must be gradual and individual. Its tools range from practicing, to rewarding/pun- –– Don’t ask them to promise things! fessional. The sooner help is received, the more
ishment, and mental persuasion. Rewards can be expressions of love and pleasure, hugs, sweets, games, –– Don’t point out the child’s flaws/mistakes! effective it can be.
or other gifts, allowing entertainment, praise. Excessive pampering of the child can undermine their inde- –– Don’t threaten! –– Lack of flexibility.

32 33
 UNIT II.
Prevention
and
intervention
of burnout

ƒƒ STRESS IN EVERYDAY LIFE

ƒƒ STRESS AT WORKPLACE
ƒƒ STRESS MANAGEMENT

Source: pixab ay.com

U N IT II  |  PRE VENTION AN D INTERVENTION OF B U RNOUT Stress in everyday life

Introduction
LEARNING OUT- After this workshop you will be able to:
COMES
 Understand what stress is (differences between eustress and distress;
acute, chronic stress)
 Find out sources of stress (in everyday life, at work)
 Recognize effects of stress on our thoughts, feelings, and behaviour
 Recognizing how stressed out we are
 Recognizing the symptoms of stress and what stressing us out
 Recognize consequences of stress on health
 Understand and recognize signs of burn-out syndrome
 Recognize how you respond to specific work stressors
 Recognize your own coping strategies with stress; effective and less
effective coping strategies
The subject of stress has become a common topic of conversation. We often hear friends,
coo-workers, and family members talk about the problems they have in managing the stresses of
everyday living. We say we feel burned out, stressed out, overwhelmed, angry, irritable, depressed,
anxious, and on the verge of losing it.
Stress is our body’s way of responding to any kind of demand. It can be caused by both good and
bad experiences. When people feel stressed by something going on around them, their bodies react
by releasing chemicals into the blood. These chemicals give people more energy and strength, which
can be a good thing if their stress is caused by a floating and they need to get out of that situation
quickly. But this can also be a bad thing, if their stress is in response to something emotional and
there is no outlet for this extra energy and strength.
To successfully relieve stress it’s important to understand it’s not the things on the outside that
do us harm; it’s how we handle these situations. Emotions, or feelings, have a powerful impact on
the human body. Emotions like frustration, insecurity and depressing feelings can be very harm-
ful to us. Positive emotions like appreciation, care, and love promote health, performance and
well-being.
Stress is all around us and affects us all – but it isn’t the same for everyone, and each of us
handles it differently. One person’s challenging pressure is someone else’s debilitating stress. Tech-
niques that work well for one person might not be so effective for someone else. There is no
single ‘right answer’, so this workshop will help you to build your own personal toolbox of stress
management skills.

 Cope with stress effectively and to use appropriate stress reduction

techniques

COMPETENCIES Self– reflection, realizing borders of competency, being able to recognize source of
TARGETED stress, stress management, time management, handling frustration, evaluate success,
recognizing coping strategies, resolving cognitive distortions, assertive way of thinking
and behaving, stress reduction techniques

TIME FRAME 6 teaching hours

ACTIVITIES Lectures (theoretical learning), self-evaluation, experiential learning and exercises

Dealing with stress is skill, and skill can’t be thought without experiential learning.
So, this workshop will provide a lot of exercises – filling the questionnaires out,
roll playing, discussing and sharing your experiences with you colleagues, using
relaxation techniques, etc.

MATERIALS/ Laptop, Flip chart, paper, crayons, pencil, audio equipment (speakerphone),
MEDIA NEEDED confectionary snacks (or nuts)

TARGET GROUP Educator/carers/foster parents

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U N IT II  |  PRE VENTION AN D INTERVENTION OF B U RNOUT Stress in everyday life

II. 1. Check off the things that you find stressful below.

Stress in everyday life STRESSOR X STRESSOR X

Work/job finance Mental health

Relationship with Relationship with

OBJECTIVES/ ƒƒ Participants will be able to recognize their own source of stress in
friends family
LEARNING everyday life
OUTCOMES
ƒƒ Participants will learn how stress can influence health Childcare Career direction

ƒƒ Participants will be aware of first signs of stress overwhelming them and Relationship with Physical health
find out if they are stress-resilient partner

CONTENT ƒƒ What is stress (differences between eustress and distress; acute, chronic Work balance Living situation
DESCRIPTION stress)
Life balance Public speaking
ƒƒ Sources of stress
Attitudes and thoughts Being organized
ƒƒ Effects of stress on our thoughts, feelings, and behaviour
Housework Time (lack of)
ƒƒ Recognizing how stressed out we are

ƒƒ Recognizing the symptoms of stress and what stresses us out Relationship with Interview for a job
colleagues
ƒƒ Consequences of stress on health

TIME FRAME 2 hrs What else stresses you out?

(TEACHING
1.
HOURS)
2.
METHODS/ Short presentation (lecture), self-evaluations using questionnaire, experiential 3.
ACTIVITIES learning
PROPOSED 4.

RESOURCES Laptop (presentation), Flip chart papers, papers, crayons, pencil

NEEDED LECTURE:
NUMBER OF Up to 15 Power point presentation (15 minutes) – Introduction to
PARTICIPANTS
stress
Practical work: We generally use the word “stress” when we feel that everything becomes too much to handle
Before we start with introduction to stress, let’s find out what you find stressful and we will discuss – we are overloaded and wonder whether we can cope with the pressures placed upon us. Anything
about that later. that poses a challenge or a threat to our well-being is a stressor. Some stressors are motivating and
(Note: distribute this check list to the participants, ask them to fill in in 5 minutes) are good for us(eustress) – without any stress our lives would be boring and probably feel pointless.

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U N IT II  |  PRE VENTION AN D INTERVENTION OF B U RNOUT Stress in everyday life

However, when stress undermines both our mental and physical health, it can have negative conse- The United States National Institute of Occupational Safety and Health has declared stress a hazard

quences (distress). of the workplace;
If we estimate that our skills are more than enough to deal with a situation, it is not seen as stressful In the workplace, stress may be related to lost hours due to illness, reduced productivity, and claims

to us. On the other hand, if we conclude that the required resources needed to effectively deal with a for worker’s compensation benefits.
situation are beyond what we have available, we say that that the situation is stressful.
What usually happens to our body when we feel stressed? We can’t sleep well, our blood pressure Physical feelings are experienced when our body reacts to stress, fear or anxiety. These symptoms are
rises, breathing becomes more rapid, our digestive system slows down, our heart rate rises, immune often referred to as the ‘fight or flight’ response. This reaction quickly and helpfully prepares the body
system is weakened, and muscles become tense. for action. It prepares us to either protect against or escape danger.
It is interesting to note that some positive and pleasant situations may still be perceived as stressful. ƒƒ Making our heart beat faster – to supply more blood to our muscles.
These symptoms may arise in response to a positive situation (wedding) as well as a negative one (di- ƒƒ Producing more sweat – to cool us down.
vorce).Our bodies react to the strong stressors in the same way. ƒƒ Tensing our muscles – getting them ready for action.
Some of the effects of stress may be reflected in our thoughts and feelings, as well as in our behaviour. ƒƒ Taking deeper and quicker breaths – to supply oxygen to our muscles.
ƒƒ Shutting down body functions that aren’t needed at the time e.g. digestion.
ƒƒ Racing thoughts – quickly narrowing the available options to make a quick response.
EFFECTS ON THOUGHTS, FEELINGS AND EFFECTS ON BEHAVIOUR
COGNITION
In the past such a reaction would have offered us some protection. Preparing us to react quickly in
case of predators, and aiding survival as we hunted and gathered food. These days we do not depend so
ƒƒ Anger ƒƒ Eating too much
much upon running or fighting as we negotiate difficult circumstances. The symptoms described above
ƒƒ Anxiety ƒƒ Eating too little
are therefore less helpful. Threats like money problems, difficulties at work, unhelpful staff or rude col-
ƒƒ Burnout ƒƒ Food cravings
leagues do not require such an extreme physical reaction. These symptoms are not dangerous in them-
ƒƒ Depression ƒƒ Sudden angry outbursts
selves. In many ways it is a useful response, but at the wrong time. We need not fear the fight or flight
ƒƒ Feelings of insecurity ƒƒ Drug abuse
reaction. It is our body’s healthy protection system. Understanding this can help us to manage the physical
ƒƒ Forgetfulness ƒƒ Alcohol abuse
symptoms. There is no need to worry about them or feel that we need to respond or react. We can just
ƒƒ Irritability ƒƒ Higher tobacco consumption
allow them to pass, as they will do quite quickly.
ƒƒ Problems concentrating ƒƒ Social withdrawal
Stress can be acute or chronic. Acutestress is sudden, short term, threatening event and situation
ƒƒ Restlessness ƒƒ Frequent crying
(public speaking, robbery, lost train, delayed flight, being late, etc). On the other hand, chronic stress
ƒƒ Sadness ƒƒ Relationship problems
is ongoing environmental demand (marital conflicts, conflicts with co-workers, delayed payment, work
ƒƒ Fatigue ƒƒ …
stress, etc.).
ƒƒ Deceased productivity
ƒƒ concentration problems
PRACTICAL WORK (20 minutes)
In order to cope with a stressful situation, it is important to know the cause of tension. What are the Prepare questionnaires for each participant
causes of stress? Of course, the triggers of stress for each individual will vary. However, the most com-
mon causes of stress are: bereavement, family problems, financial matters, Illness, lack of time, moving, CAUSES OF STRESS
relationships (conflicts), academic exam results, noisy neighbours, etc. What causes your stress? List the things that you have found stressful over the past few weeks:
Individual responses to these situations vary. However, if we look at the column «Effects on be-

haviour» (spreadsheet), we will notice that human behaviour under stress is most often associated with
negative outcomes.
Here are some important facts about stress:

43% of adults have experienced adverse health effects from stress;

People with high stress are twice as likely to develop colds as those with low stress;

75-90% of visits to a physician’s office are for stress-related conditions and complaints;


Stress has been linked to the six leading causes of death: heart disease, cancer, lung ailments, acci-

dents, cirrhosis of the liver, and suicide;

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U N IT II  |  PRE VENTION AN D INTERVENTION OF B U RNOUT Stress in everyday life

What about chronic stresses? List the biggest causes of stress for you over the past year or more: Thinking Styles: Stress can make some people feel anxious and down. This can impact how we think
about ourselves and other people. We are more likely to think negatively about a situation. It is also com-

mon to feel that we are unable to cope. You might think that what is being demanded of you outweighs
your ability to manage.The way we think has a direct relationship to how we feel and how we behave.
Thinking style affects how stressed we get in any situation.
One of the thinking styles is optimistic/pessimistic. Negative thoughts lead to negative outcomes and,

in turn, can propel a crisis into a drama. People who viewed the world more optimistically had half the
risk of coronary heart disease than their more pessimistic counterparts. A rigid, inflexible thinking style
can make a person more vulnerable to stress. It has been found that when we feel stressed this alters our

thinking; when we suffer acute, short-term stress the fight/flight response helps us think more quickly and
more clearly, but long-term, chronic stress can undermine our ability to think clearly and interferes with
our problem solving ability especially when we are trying to deal with complex, psychological stressors.
We become more pessimistic, more negative and more vulnerable to negative thinking about ourselves,
What is bothering you the most today? our abilities, other people and the world in general; this vicious cycle can maintain and exacerbate any
stress, and hinder our ability to cope with and deal with the stress we are under.

Most of us sometimes use words like “disastrous”, “devastated”, “ruined”, “impossible”, to describe
either the way we feel or situations we’re involved in. Using this language leads to another way of thinking,
called catastrophizing. Sometimes, when we’re unhappy or stressed, there’s a tendency to magnify the
negative aspects and discount the positive. It’s possible to get trapped in this mode of thought and it can

be difficult to move forward. We may not always be able to change the situations but we can make ad-
justments to the ways we perceive them simply by making a more conscious effort to modify the language
we use. We’ll experience less stress and see more options for solutions.

Over-generalization is one way of thinking. In this cognitive distortion, we come to a general con-
clusion based on a single incident or a single piece of evidence. If something bad happens only once, we
expect it to happen over and over again. A person may see a single, unpleasant event as part of a nev-
er-ending pattern of defeat.
(Note: Ask participants to share their answers with others. Write down their answers on flip chart paper and Filtering means thata person takes the negative details and magnify them while filtering out all posi-
proceed to discuss them. Emphasise the differences between stressful events and situations among participants.) tive aspects of a situation. For instance, a person may pick out a single, unpleasant detail and dwell on it
exclusively so that their vision of reality becomes darkened or distorted.
In polarized thinking (or “Black and White” thinking) things are either “black-or-white.” We have
LECTURE (20 MINUTES) to be perfect or we’re a failure — there is no middle ground. We place people or situations in “either/
or” categories, with no shades of grey. If our performance falls short of perfect, we see ourselves as a
What causes stress? total failure.
Life Events: Particular life events can cause people significant problems with stress. Difficulties that Jumping to Conclusions means that we have tendency to “know” what people feel and why they act
were previously manageable might also become much more challenging to cope with. the way they do without individuals saying so. For example, a person may anticipate that things will turn
For example: out badly, and will feel convinced that their prediction is already an established fact.
ƒƒ Being unemployed or losing a job Personalization is a distortion where a person believes that everything others do or say is some kind
ƒƒ Divorce or family turmoil of direct, personal reaction to the person. A person engaging in personalization may also see themselves
ƒƒ Death of a relative or close friend as the cause of some unhealthy external event that they were not responsible for. For example, “We
ƒƒ Health problems were late to the meeting and caused the presenter to delay his presentation. If I had only pushed my hus-
ƒƒ Getting married band to leave on time, this wouldn’t have happened.”
ƒƒ Having a baby Fallacy of Fairness. People feel resentful because they think they know what is fair, but other people
ƒƒ Starting a new job won’t agree with us. People who go through life applying a measuring ruler against every situation judg-
ƒƒ Financial difficulties (e.g. debt) ing its “fairness” will often feel badly and negative because of it. Because life isn’t “fair” — things will not
ƒƒ Neighbourhood problems (e.g. noise) always work out in our favour, even when we think they should.

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U N IT II  |  PRE VENTION AN D INTERVENTION OF B U RNOUT Stress in everyday life

Blaming, as a way of thinking means that we hold other people responsible for our pain, or take the In the last month, how often have you:
other track and blame ourselves for every problem. For example, “Stop making me feel bad about my-
self!” Nobody can “make” us feel any particular way — only we have control over our own emotions and 1. Been upset because of something that
emotional reactions. happened unexpectedly? 0 1 2 3 4
Shoulds – peoplehave a list of firm rules about how others and we should behave. People who break
2. Felt that you were unable to control the
the rules make us angry, and we feel guilty when we violate these rules. A person may often believe they
important things in your life? 0 1 2 3 4
are trying to motivate themselves with shoulds and shouldnt’s. For example, “I really should exercise. I
shouldn’t be so lazy.” Musts and oughts are also offenders. The emotional consequence is guilt. When a 3. Felt nervous and under pressure?
person directs should statements toward others, they often feel anger, frustration and resentment. 0 1 2 3 4
Global labelling – peoplegeneralize one or two qualities into a negative global judgment. For example, 4. Felt unsure about your ability to handle
they may say, “I’m a loser” in a situation where they failed at a specific task. Labelling is a form of stereo- your personal problems? 0 1 2 3 4
typing and it is well known how clunky and inaccurate that can be (for example: ‘all rich people are . . .’ ‘all 5. Felt that things weren’t going your way?
drug users are . . .’). 0 1 2 3 4
As we become more stressed the tendency is for our thinking to become more negative. This acts
6. Found that you could not cope with all
like a trigger for pulling up negative memories as well as making negative associations about the people
the things that you had to do? 0 1 2 3 4
we associate and work with. Yet the way we interpret situations is absolutely key as to whether we feel
sufficiently empowered or incapable of dealing with them. 7. Been unable to control irritations in
Behavioural Explanations: People may find that they have developed strategies to avoid or escape your life? 0 1 2 3 4
situations in which they feel stressed. Such a pattern of behaviour may not be realistic or sustainable as a 8. Felt that you weren’t on top of things?
solution. In fact, this can make things worse. 0 1 2 3 4
Biological Reasons: There may be some traits that biologically predispose individuals to experience 9. Been angered because of things that
more stress than others. For example, a high concentration of the stress hormone ‘cortisol’. Over a pe- were outside of your control? 0 1 2 3 4
riod of time this can weaken your immune system.
10. Felt difficulties were piling up so high
In reality it is likely that a combination of all these factors influence someone’s stress.
that you could not overcome them? 0 1 2 3 4

Count the number that you circled and check your results.
PRACTICAL WORK (50 MINUTES)
Prepare test for each participant Interpreting the score:
Let’s find out how much stress you perceived, what is your thinking style, where in body do you fell SCORE YOUR STRESS LEVEL
stress and are you resistant to stress.
0 to 10 Below average You seem to be handling life’s stressors well at the moment
Perceives Stress Scale (PSS)
(10 minutes) 11 to 14 Average Your life is far from stress-free so now is the time to learn
how to reduce your stress to healthier levels.
Instruction:
The questions in this scale ask you about your feelings and thoughts during THE LAST MONTH. In each case, 15 to 18 Medium-High Stress is already affecting your mood, productivity, and
you will be asked to indicate your response by circling the number which representing HOW OFTEN you felt or relationships.
thought a certain way. The best approach is to answer fairly quickly. That is, don’t try to count up the number of 19 + High You’re experiencing high levels of stress. The higher your
times you felt a particular way, but rather indicate the alternative that seems like a reasonable estimate. score, the more damage stress is doing to your mind, body,
0 – Never and behaviour.
1 – Almost never Discuss the score of every participant. Ask them what kind of coping strategies they use to reduce it, what influence it
2 – Sometimes has on their everyday life.
3 – Fairly often
4 – Very often

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U N IT II  |  PRE VENTION AN D INTERVENTION OF B U RNOUT
The body’s stress responses
(5 minutes)
When we perceive a threat, our nervous sys-
tem responds by releasing a flood of stress hor-
mones, including adrenaline and cortisol. These
hormones rouse the body for emergency action:
heart pounds faster, muscles tighten, blood pres-
sure rises, breath quickens, and our senses be-
come sharper. These physical changes increase our
strength and stamina, speed your reaction time,
and enhance your focus—preparing you to either
fight or flight from the danger at hand.
Mark on the body where you feel sensation while
you are under the stress. Discuss about similarity and
differences on bodily sensations.
46
Stress in everyday life
Understanding your problem
(10 minutes)
You are stuck in a traffic jam on the way to an important meeting that can directly affect your
chances of clinching a major contract.  You love your job and you really don’t want to lose it.  
Which of the following sounds more like you?
“This is awful…I’m really stupid…why didn’t I leave more time?  They will think I am so unprofessional – I’ve
really screwed up.  Come on get a move on there’s plenty of space to get through there….”
OR
“This isn’t exactly the best thing that could have happened.  However, getting upset is not going to make the
traffic move any faster.  It’s better for me to stay calm and arrive in a fit state for what I have to do.”
Shortly discuss in pairs about this different situations and share with group. What are out-
comes of your behaviour (depends on your common behaviour – regarding this situations mentioned
above). Discuss some other choices of situations.
Many people who are stressed avoid people, places or situations that they associate with stress. Avoid-
ing problems rather than facing them can make things worse. For example, not replying to communica-
tions from friends.
Stress may build up due to factors that are out-of– your control. On the other hand, you might have
developed a habit of taking of working too much. You may not feel confident saying ‘no’ when you are
asked to take on new projects. There may be things that we can do to manage situations and prevent the
stress from getting worse.
When looking more closely at what stops us overcoming stress, it becomes clear that our behaviour,
thoughts, feelings and physical sensations all interact and combine to keep our stress going.
Let’s make overall approach to your stress after we learnt what influences stress has on your life.
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U N IT II  |  PRE VENTION AN D INTERVENTION OF B U RNOUT
Fill in something of your own experience. You may begin to understand your difficulties better. Partic-
ularly what patterns may exist and how things interact.
(Note: take 20 minutes for this exercise).
SITUATION:
FEELINGS:
THOUGHTS: PHYSICAL SYMPTOMS:
BEHAVIOURS:
Discuss in small groups about your stressful situation, what thoughts you have/had, what kind of physical symp-
toms you have/had, mark them into drawn man (previous exercise) and what influences it had on your behaviour
(describe you behaviour pattern in that specific stressful situation). ƒƒ Headaches – stress is considered one of the most common triggers for tensionheadaches and
LECTURE (10 minutes)
Stress and your health
We’ve all felt stress. Sometimes stress can be a positive force, motivating us to perform well at job
interview. But often — like when we’re stuck in traffic — it’s a negative force. If we experience stress
over a prolonged period of time, it could become chronic — unless we take action. Even short-lived,
minor stress can have an impact. We might get a stomach-ache before we have to give a presentation,
for example. More major acute stress can have an even bigger impact. Multiple studies have shown that
sudden emotional stresses — especially anger — can trigger heart attacks, arrhythmias and even sudden
death. Although this happens mostly to people who already have heart disease, some people don’t know
they have a problem until acute stress causes a heart attack or something worse.
48
Stress in everyday life
When stress starts interfering with our ability to live a normal life for an extended period, it becomes
even more dangerous. The longer the stress lasts, the worse it is for both our mind and body. We might
feel fatigued, unable to concentrate or irritable for no good reason. Stress can make existing problems
worse. One study showed that about half the participants saw improvements in chronic headaches af-
ter learning how to stop the stress-producing habit of “catastrophizing,” or constantly thinking negative
thoughts about their pain. Chronic stress may also cause disease, either because of changes in our body
or the overeating, smoking and other bad habits people use to cope with stress. Job strain — high de-
mands coupled with low decision-making latitude — is associated with increased risk of coronary disease.
Other forms of chronic stress, such as depression and low levels of social support, have also been impli-
cated in increased cardiovascular risk. And once we’re sick, stress can also make it harder to recover and
increase risks of bad outcomes.
Stress suppresses the immune system, that’s way is so easily catch a cold while we are under long
existing pressure.
These are some health problems related to stress:
ƒƒ Heart disease – stress candirectly increase heart rate and blood flow, and causes the release
of cholesterol and triglycerides into the blood stream. It’s also possible that stress is related to
other problems -– an increased likelihood of smoking or obesity that indirectly increase the
heart risks.
ƒƒ Asthma – many studies have shown that stress can worsen asthma. Some evidence suggests that
a parent’s chronic stress might even increase the risk of developing asthma in their children. One
study looked at how parental stress affected the asthma rates of young children who were also
exposed to air pollution or whose mothers smoked during pregnancy. Children with stressed
out parents had a substantially higher risk of developing asthma.
ƒƒ Obesity – excess fat in the belly seems to pose greater health risks than fat on the legs or hips
and unfortunately, that’s just where people with high stress seem to store it. Stress causes
higher levels of the hormone cortisol, which increases the amount of fat that’s deposited in the
abdomen.
ƒƒ Diabetes – stress can worsen diabetes in two ways. First, it increases the likelihood of bad be-
haviours, such as unhealthy eating and excessive drinking. Second, stress raises the glucose levels
of people with type 2 diabetes directly.
migraines as well.
ƒƒ Depression and anxiety – chronic stress is connected with higher rates of depression and anx-
iety. One survey found that people who had stress related to their jobs -– like demanding work
had an 80% higher risk of developing depression within a few years than people with lower
stress.
ƒƒ Gastrointestinal problems – stress doesn’t cause ulcers. But, it can make them worse. On the
other hand, stress is a common factor in many other GI conditions, such as chronic heartburn
and irritable bowel syndrome.
ƒƒ Accelerated ageing. There’s evidence that stress can affect how we age. One study compared
the DNA of mothers who were under high stress (they were caring for a chronically ill child)with
women who were not. Researchers found that a particular region of the chromosomes showed
the effects of accelerated aging. Stress seemed to accelerate ageing byabout 9 to 17 additional
years.
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U N IT II  |  PRE VENTION AN D INTERVENTION OF B U RNOUT Stress at workplace

II. 2. What is work-related stress?

ƒƒ Work-related stress is the response people may have when presented with work demands and pres-

Stress in the workplace sures that are not matched to their knowledge and abilities and which challenge their ability to cope.
ƒƒ Stress occurs in a wide range of work circumstances but is often made worse when employees feel
they have little support from superiors and colleagues, as well as little control over work processes.
ƒƒ There is often confusion between pressure or challenge and stress and sometimes it is used to
excuse bad management practice.
OBJECTIVES/ ƒƒ Participants will be able to recognize source of stress at work Pressure in the workplace is unavoidable due to the demands of the contemporary work envi-
LEARNING ronment. Pressure perceived as acceptable by an individual, may even keep workers alert, motivated,
OUTCOMES ƒƒ Participants will gain the knowledge of burn-out syndrome able to work and learn, depending on the available resources and personal characteristics. However,
when that pressure becomes excessive or otherwise unmanageable it leads to stress. Stress can
ƒƒ Participants will be able to recognize signs of burn-out syndrome
damage an employees’ health and business performance.
Work-related stress can be caused by poor work organisation (the way we design jobs and work
ƒƒ Participants will be able to recognize how they respond to specific
systems, and the way we manage them), by poor work design (for example, lack of control over
work stressors
work processes), poor management, unsatisfactory working conditions, and lack of support from
colleagues and supervisors.
CONTENT ƒƒ Types of stress at workplace Research findings show that the most stressful type of work is that which values excessive de-
DESCRIPTION
mands and pressures that are not matched to workers’ knowledge and abilities, where there is little
ƒƒ What is burnout syndrome
opportunity to exercise any choice or control, and where there is little support from others.
ƒƒ Mental and physical signs of burnout syndrome Employees are less likely to experience work-related stress when – demands and pressures of
work are matched to their knowledge and abilities – control can be exercised over their work and
ƒƒ Consequences of burn-out syndrome on health the way they do it – support is received from supervisors and colleagues – participation in decisions
that concern their jobs is provided.
TIME FRAME 2 hrs
(TEACHING HOURS) Stress-related hazards at work
METHODS/ACTIVITIES Short presentation (lecture), self-evaluations using questionnaire, Stress related hazards at work can be divided into work content and work context.
PROPOSED experiential learning Work contents includes:
ƒƒ job content (monotony, under-stimulation, meaningless of tasks, lack of variety, etc.)
RESOURCES NEEDED Laptop (presentation), Flip chart papers, papers, crayons, pencil ƒƒ work load and work pace (too much or too little to do, work under time pressure, etc.)
ƒƒ working hours (strict or inflexible, long and unsocial, unpredictable, poorly designed shift systems)
NUMBER OF Up to 15 ƒƒ participation and control (lack of participation in decision-making, lack of control over work pro-
PARTICIPANTS cesses, pace, hours, methods, and the work environment)
Work context includes:
ƒƒ career development, status and pay (job insecurity, lack of promotion opportunities, under– or
over-promotion, work of ‘low social value’, piece rate payment schemes, unclear or unfair perfor-
LECTURE (10 minutes) mance evaluation systems, being over– or under-skilled for a job)
ƒƒ role in the organization (unclear role, conflicting roles)
Introduction to stress at work ƒƒ Interpersonal relationships (inadequate, inconsiderate or unsupportive supervision, poor relation-
It is found that we spend approximately 60% of our waking productive lives at work. A healthy job, ships with colleagues, bullying-mobbing/harassment and violence, isolated or solitary work, etc.)
less stressful job, is likely to be one where the pressures on employees are appropriate in relation to ƒƒ organizational culture (poor communication, poor leadership, lack of behavioural rule, lack of clarity
their abilities and resources, to the amount of control they have over their work, and to the support they about organizational objectives, structures and strategies)
receive from theirs superiors. ƒƒ work-life balance (conflicting demands of work and home, lack of support for domestic problems
at work, lack of support for work problems at home, lack of organizational rules and policies to
support work-life balance)

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U N IT II  |  PRE VENTION AN D INTERVENTION OF B U RNOUT Stress at workplace

Some scientific evidences: ƒƒ Impaired performance and productivity

ƒƒ Great decision-making power reduces rates of absences and staff turnover ƒƒ Increasing unsafe working practices and accident rates
ƒƒ Decision-making power increases level of performance, job satisfaction and reduces financial losses ƒƒ Increasing complaints from clients and customers
ƒƒ Lack of decision-making latitude and recognition increases the risk of cardio-vascular diseases ƒƒ Adversely affecting staff recruitment
ƒƒ A clearly defined role decreases absenteeism and lateness ƒƒ Increasing liability to legal claims and actions by stressed workers
ƒƒ Low workplace support increases the rate of absence ƒƒ Damaging the organization’s image both among its workers and externally
ƒƒ High support at work decreases the intentions to quit job
ƒƒ Abusive supervision is associated with an increase in absenteeism
ƒƒ High presence of interpersonal conflicts within a work team is associated with a reduction in per-
PRACTICAL WORK (45 minutes)
formance Prepare questionnaires for each participant
ƒƒ The manager-subordinate relationship is the most commonly reported cause of stress
ƒƒ Manager behaviour can have a significant impact on health outcomes of subordinates During this activity you can identify how you see your job – satisfying or potentially great source of
stress and you can find out are you trapped in work dominated lives.
The effects of work related stress
JOB STRESS SCALE (10 minutes)
These effect can be divided into: Instructions: Complete the scale by ticking those items which apply to you.
ƒƒ Effects on individual
ƒƒ Effect on organization
1. I find that on the whole my work is varied and interesting.

The effects of work stress on individuals 2. My department/office is adequately staffed.

Stress affects different people in different ways. The experience of work stress can cause unusual and 3. If changes in work methods or equipment are under consideration I am always consulted.
dysfunctional behaviour at work and contribute to poor physical and mental health. In extreme cases, long-
4. Generally my work load is not too heavy.
term stress or traumatic events at work may lead to psychological problems and be conductive to psychi-
atric disorders resulting in absence from work and preventing the worker from being able to work again. 5. We have a recognized procedure to follow if I have a complaint.
When under stress, people find it difficult to maintain a healthy work-life balance.
6. Generally my working conditions are good with few difficulties over noise, heat levels or vibrations.
When affected by work stress people may:
ƒƒ become increasingly distressed and irritable 7. I understand and agree with my job description.
ƒƒ become unable to relax or concentrate 8. Any good work that I do is recognized by my employer.
ƒƒ have difficulty thinking logically and making decisions
9. I am properly rewarded for the work that I do.
ƒƒ enjoy their work less and feel less committed to it
ƒƒ feel tired, depressed and anxious 10. Most of the time I have a clear understanding of what is expected of me in my work.
ƒƒ have difficulty sleeping
11. I have found that I have opportunities to go on learning in my job.
ƒƒ experience serious physical problems, such as heart disease, disorders of the digestive system,
increases in blood pressure, headaches, musculo-skeletal disorders (such as lower back pain and 12. I have been trained adequately for the work that I do.
upper limb disorders) 13. I find that I can generally complete the work in the time allocated.
14. I do not find that there is too much pressure to get my work done.
The effects of work stress on organizations
If key staff or a large number of workers are affected, work stress may challenge the healthiness and 15. I am rarely asked to make decisions above and beyond the level of my responsibility.
performance of their organization.
16. I am satisfied with the amount of responsibility that goes with my job.
Unhealthy organizations do not get the best from their workers and this may affect not only their
performance in the increasingly competitive market but eventually even their survival. 17. I feel that my job makes good use of my skills and competencies.
Work stress is thought to affect organizations by: 18. I am not asked to do things in my job that are beyond my level of competence.
ƒƒ Increasing absenteeism
19. I feel that I have enough control over the decisions that are made in my job.
ƒƒ Decreasing commitment to work
ƒƒ Increasing staff turn-over 20. I find that I have sufficient support for my ideas about how to do things in my job.

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U N IT II  |  PRE VENTION AN D INTERVENTION OF B U RNOUT Stress at workplace

SCORING 8. Do you contact your colleagues outside

 Count the number of ticks. working hours to discuss work? 0 1 2 3 4
9. Are you impatient with your spouse,
16+ – Your job is satisfying and gives you an opportunity for expression and achievement partner or family because you are 0 1 2 3 4
10 to 15 – There are many things in your job that could be improved. A continuous lack of distracted by work?
opportunity and blocking may be sources of stress that could lead to frustration and substantial 10. Are you annoyed by domestic activities
dissatisfaction with your job. (example: having to take children to 0 1 2 3 4
≤10 – Your job is potentially a great source of stress. You need to urgently consider changing school) which take you away from work?
yourself or your job. 11. Do you find you are only just recovering
from the working week by Sunday? 0 1 2 3 4
(Note: ask participants to share their results with group and discuss about findings – ask participants to give 12. Do you find it difficult to relax during
some explanations of their results – 25 minutes) the first few days of a holiday? 0 1 2 3 4
13. Are you eager to go back to work after
Stress audit – are you trapped in work dominated lives a holiday? 0 1 2 3 4

and suffering from stress (15 minutes) 14. When travelling to and from work do
you fail to remember the journey because 0 1 2 3 4
Instructions: Circle one number for every item. you are absorbed in your work?
0 – Never 15. Do you find you discuss work in the
1 – Rarely most social situations (example– dinner 0 1 2 3 4
parties)?
2 – Sometimes
16. Is physical exercise the activity of last
3 – Frequently
resort? 0 1 2 3 4

1. Do you find it difficult to relax and go to 17. Do you find that you are really not listening
sleep at night because you are thinking 0 1 2 3 4 to people but thinking about what you 0 1 2 3 4
about work? need to do next in your job?

2. Do you wake up early in the morning 18. Do you feel that you are constantly
thinking about what has to be done during 0 1 2 3 4 under pressure and in a rush? 0 1 2 3 4
the day? 19. Do you get impatient with work
3. Are you one of the last to leave colleagues who do not take work as 0 1 2 3 4
the office? 0 1 2 3 4 seriously as you?

4. Do you take work home in

the evenings? 0 1 2 3 4 20. Do you need to have your achievements
and successes recognized by others? 0 1 2 3 4
5. Do you take work home at the Count the number that you circled and check your results.
weekends? 0 1 2 3 4
6. Do you miss lunch during the
working week? 0 1 2 3 4
7. Do you give your home telephone number
to work related contacts? 0 1 2 3 4

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U N IT II  |  PRE VENTION AN D INTERVENTION OF B U RNOUT
Interpreting the score:
0-25 Excellent. You have a high degree of self-esteem and identity and have a healthy control over
your work life.
25-40 Fair. Your life is moderately work dominated but be careful. Look at the questions to which you
have answered frequently. Do you have an impatient personality? Is work spilling into your home life?
Modify your behaviour accordingly.
40-50 Poor. You have a work-dominated life and are displaying behaviour which can damage your
relationships outside of your job. Be more assertive and control the time boundaries between home
and work. Maintain a proper diet and recuperate with regular exercise. Break the circle of stress
before it causes more serious problems.
(Note: ask your participants to share their results, discuss about their score, ask them to find items
they circled with higher number and ask them to find what they can do to change it, ask participant to
give each other some solutions – type of activity, group work, 15 minutes)
(Note: Work in a small groups (up to three), discuss possible solutions to this situation. Share your
answers and solutions with the group – 20 minutes for this exercise).
You came to the work very nervous and tired, because you had very difficult night (you had a quarrel with
your husband/wife). Today, you have to finish your assignment and deliver it to your boss. It is very important for
you to finish it on time, you promotion depends on it. But, you just have received a phone call, and you are told to
deliver your work in two hours to you superior (he must prepare himself for a meeting with the executive director).
At the same time you have a meeting with your clients, who are waiting for you very nervously (you made this
appointment one month ago).
ƒƒ How much this situations is stressful for you? (from 1 – not at all; to 5 – very stressful)
ƒƒ What thoughts do you have?
ƒƒ How will you solve this situation?
LECTURE (10 minutes)
Burnout syndrome
Burnout is a work-specific syndrome, and it is becoming a more common result as the modern work-
place changes. Being both economically and psychologically exhausting, the increasingly hostile and de-
manding environments in which employees work is being studied as a cause. More frequently economic
values are being placed ahead of human values. The phenomenon is more likely when a mismatch is pres-
ent between the nature of the job and the person doing the job. A common indication of this mismatch
is work overload. It involves doing too much with too few resources, going beyond person limits.
While the typical causes of burnout result directly from work, such as the feeling of no control over
one’s work, lack of recognition for good work, and unclear and overly demanding expectations, the phe-
nomenon may be supplemented by lifestyle and personality outside of the workplace. For instance, lack
of sleep and close/personal relationships, high expectations from too many people, working to the point
of not allowing time for relaxation and socializing, and pessimistic tendencies all will aid in creating the
feeling of burnout if the work environment is already overly pressing.
56
Stress at workplace
Although burnout may sound a lot like stress, it is important to realize that they are not one and the
same. While stress is characterized by over-engagement, burnout is characterized by dis-engagement.
Stress ultimately produces urgency and hyperactivity, whereas burnout produces helplessness or hope-
lessness. And although stress may cause loss of energy and anxiety disorders, burnout often involves loss
of motivation, ideals, and hope.
Some psychologist divided burnout process into 12 phases: which are not necessarily followed se-
quentially:
1. The Compulsion to Prove Oneself
Often found at the beginning is excessive ambition. This is one’s desire to prove themselves while at
the workplace. This desire turns into determination and compulsion.
2. Working Harder
Because they have to prove themselves to others or try to fit in an organization that does not suit
them, people establish high personal expectations. In order to meet these expectations, they tend to fo-
cus only on work while they take on more work than they usually would. It may happen that they become
obsessed with doing everything themselves. This will show that they are irreplaceable since they are able
to do so much work without enlisting in the help of others.
3. Neglecting Their Needs
Since they have devoted everything to work, they now have no time and energy for anything else.
Friends and family, eating, and sleeping start to become seen as unnecessary or unimportant, as they
reduce the time and energy that can be spent on work.
4. Displacement of Conflicts
Now, the person has become aware that what they are doing is not right, but they are unable to see
the source of the problem. This could lead to a crisis in themselves and become threatening. This is when
the first physical symptoms are expressed.
5. Revision of Values
In this stage, people isolate themselves from others, they avoid conflicts, and fall into a state of denial
towards their basic physical needs while their perceptions change. They also change their value system.
The work consumes all energy they have left, leaving no energy and time for friends and hobbies. Their
new value system is their job and they start to be emotionally blunt.
6. Denial of Emerging Problems
Person begins to become intolerant. They do not like being social, and if they were to have social con-
tact, it would be merely unbearable for them. Outsiders tend to see more aggression and sarcasm. It is
not uncommon for them to blame their increasing problems on time pressure and all the work that they
have to do, instead of on the ways that they have changed, themselves.
7. Withdrawal
Social contact is now at a minimum, soon turning into isolation. Alcohol or drugs may be sought out
for a release since they are obsessively working “by the book”. They often have feelings of being without
hope or direction.
8. Obvious Behavioural Changes
Co-workers, family, friends, and other people that are in their immediate social circles cannot over-
look the behavioural changes of this person.
9. Depersonalization
Losing contact with themselves, it’s possible that they no longer see themselves or others as valuable.
The person also loses track of their personal needs. Their view of life narrows to only seeing in the pres-
ent time, while their life turns to a series of mechanical functions.
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U N IT II  |  PRE VENTION AN D INTERVENTION OF B U RNOUT Stress at workplace

10. Inner Emptiness 1. I feel little enthusiasm for doing my job

People feel empty inside and to overcome this, they might look for activity such as overeating, sex, 0 1 2 3 4
alcohol, or drugs. These activities are often exaggerated.
2. I feel tired even with adequate sleep
11. Depression
0 1 2 3 4
Burnout may include depression. In that case, the person is exhausted, hopeless, indifferent, and be-
lieves that there is nothing for them in the future. To them, there is no meaning of life. Typical depression 3. I feel frustrated in carrying out my
symptoms arise. responsibilities at work 0 1 2 3 4
12. Burnout Syndrome 4. I am moody, irritable, or impatient over small
They collapse physically and emotionally and should seek immediate medical attention. In extreme inconveniences 0 1 2 3 4
cases, usually only when depression is involved, suicidal ideation may occur, with it being viewed as an 5. I want to withdraw from the constant
escape from their situation. Only a few people will actually commit suicide. demands on my time and energy 0 1 2 3 4
The classic symptoms of job burnout include pessimism, increased dissatisfaction, absenteeism and
6. I feel negative, futile, or depressed about
inefficiency at work. Every job includes some built-in difficulties that the worker is paid to adjust to the
my job 0 1 2 3 4
job. Job difficulties alone do not cause burnout, but worker’s lack of control over his/her job situation that
leads to uncertainty, frustration, reduce motivation and eventually burnout. 7. My decision-making ability seems less
Even minor factors beyond your control can have a stressful impact. Consider the many unexpected inter- than usual 0 1 2 3 4
ruption in everyday work: special meetings, phone calls, people dropping in, equipment breakdown, and so on. 8. I think I am not as efficient as I should be
Job stress management is effective in increasing our sense of control in the work setting, and increased 0 1 2 3 4
feelings of control can improve job-related symptoms of guilt, irritability, depression, anxiety, and low self-es- 9. The quality of my work is less than it
teem. Job stress management can also reduce job related psychosomatic symptoms such as, insomnia, ulcer, should be 0 1 2 3 4
headaches, eating disorders and so on.
10. I feel physically, emotionally, or spiritually
depleted 0 1 2 3 4
PRACTICAL WORK (55 MINUTES) 11. My resistance to illness is lowered
Prepare questionnaires for each participant 0 1 2 3 4
12. My interest in sex is lowered
During this activity you can find outhow you respond to specific work stressors, recognize your own 0 1 2 3 4
coping strategies with stress; effective and less effective coping strategies, understand and recognize signs
13. I am eating more or less; drinking more
of burnout syndrome.
coffee, tea, or sodas; smoking more cigarettes; or 0 1 2 3 4
using more alcohol or drugs than usual in order
SOME POSSIBLE STEPS TOWARD MANAGING JOB STRESS to cope with my job
14. I am feeling emotionally callous about the
1. Identify your symptoms of job stress (10 minutes)
problems and needs of others 0 1 2 3 4
Instructions: Rate each of the following items on terms of how often the symptom as true for you
during the last three months: 15. My communication with my boss, co-
(Note: ask participants to share their results, and briefly discuss them) workers, friends, or family seems strained 0 1 2 3 4
0 – Never 16. I’m forgetful
1 – Occasionally 0 1 2 3 4
2 – Somewhat often
17. I’m having difficulty concentrating
3 – Frequently
0 1 2 3 4
4 – Almost always
18. I am easily bored
0 1 2 3 4

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19. I feel a sense of dissatisfaction, of something Environment (for example: Lack of privacy,
wrong or missing 0 1 2 3 4 hazardous environment…) 0 1 2 3 4
20. When I ask myself why I get up and go to Value conflict
work, the only answer that occurs is “my pay 0 1 2 3 4 0 1 2 3 4
check”
Find areas you rated as frequently or almost always – this is your source of job stress. Ask participants
to share their answers and discuss them – find similarities or differences between participant’s answers).
Count the number that you circled and check your results.
If you scored: 3. Identify how you respond to job stress(10 minutes)
0 – 25 – you are probably coping adequately with the stress of your job (Note: take 10 minutes for this exercise and briefly discuss the answers)
26 – 40 – you are suffering from job stress and would be wise to take preventive action
JOB STRESS YOUR FEELINGS YOUR THOUGHTS YOUR BEHAVIOUR
41 – 55 – you need to take preventive action to avoid job burnout
56 – 80 – you are burning out and must develop a comprehensive job stress management plan

2. Identify the sources of job stress (10 minutes)

Instructions: Rate your experience in your job during the past year, using the following 5-point scale.
(Note: take 10 minutes for this exercise)
0 – Never
1 – Occasionally
2 – Somewhat often
3 – Frequently Briefly discuss answers.
4 – Almost always (Note: take 10 minutes for this exercise)

Lack of control Set your goals

0 1 2 3 4 Goals must be:
 Specific
Information gap
 Observable
0 1 2 3 4
 Achievable within in certain time frame
Cause and effect (for example: No relationship  Broken down into small intermediate steps
between how I perform and how I am rated; 0 1 2 3 4  Compatible with long-terms goals
don’t know what my supervisors thinks of my  Written down in self-contract form
performance, and so)  Re-evaluated in specific intervals
Conflict  Rewarded when achieved
0 1 2 3 4
Alienation Ask participants to make self-contract (ask them to use real problem – job stress situation and to try
0 1 2 3 4 to solve it with self-contract)
Blocked career
(your name), agree to:
0 1 2 3 4
Overload 1.
0 1 2 3 4

Under load
0 1 2 3 4

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U N IT II PRE VENTION AN D INTERVENTION OF B U RNOUT

2. II.3.

Stress management
3.


OBJECTIVES/ ƒƒ Participant will be able to recognize their own coping
LEARNING OUTCOMES strategies with stress
ƒƒ Participant will learn of effective and less effective coping
strategies
ƒƒ Participant will learn how to cope with stress effectively
I will monitor my progress every (put length of time)
ƒƒ Participant will learn how to use stress reduction techniques
I will reward myself with COMPETENCIES TARGETED Recognizing coping strategies, resolving cognitive distortions,
assertive way of thinking and behaving, stress reduction techniques
(Note: take 10 minutes for this exercise) CONTENT DESCRIPTION ƒƒ Coping with stress – problem oriented coping, emotional
oriented coping and avoidance
ƒƒ Effective and less effective coping strategies with stress
Change your way of thinking (15 minutes) ƒƒ Resolving cognitive distortions as a source of stress
ƒƒ Time management
Ask participants to take one stressful job situation. Ask them to give an answers to these questions: ƒƒ Assertive way of thinking and behaving
ƒƒ What is the worst that could happened? ƒƒ Stress reduction techniques:
ƒƒ How that would affect their life? A) body awareness
ƒƒ Would they be able to cope with that outcome (situation) B) breathing and visualization
ƒƒ What could be positive aspect of that outcome? C) progressive relaxation
(Note: take 15 minutes for this exercise) D) thought stopping technique
E) mindfulness technique
TIME FRAME (TEACHING 2 hrs
HOURS)
METHODS/ACTIVITIES Short presentation (lecture), self-evaluations using questionnaire,
PROPOSED experiential learning
RESOURCES NEEDED Laptop (presentation), Flip chart papers, papers, crayons, pencil,
candies (or nuts), audio equipment (speakerphone)
NUMBER OF PARTICIPANTS Up to 15

This whole block will be conceptualized as a practical work, with short explanation of every ex-
ercise. It won’t be specified separately what lecture is or what practical work is. Only the name of
every exercise will be provided.

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Personal/individual strategies for managing stress
Stress is specific to each individual. What one person might find stressful is not necessarily stressful
for another. In addition, several people in the same stressful situation may respond quite differently. The
individual is important in stress management. Therefore, individuals need to recognize and analyse for
themselves the signs and causes of stress at work or in everyday life. Understanding one’s own personal
sense of stress is a necessary part of the process that will enable coping mechanisms to develop.
Let‘s start with stress management!
Firstly, we are going to find out how you cope with stressful situations: what are your coping skills
and habits.
(Note: take 25 minutes for this exercise)
How do you usually handle stress? List your usual coping habits.
How effective are the coping behaviours you have used in the past? Do they reduce or eliminate the
stress? Give a short explanation.
Which of the coping techniques did you use in the past but are no longer using? Why?
(Note: Ask participants to share their answers, discuss them, and give them some explanation of answers they
previously gave. Give them feedback about good and less good coping strategies.)
64
Stress management
Changing Situations (20 minutes)
Choose one of your stress causes. How can this situation be changed or improved?
For example:  
Relationship stress – assertive communication training, setting boundaries, resolving conflict  
Over-commitment – setting boundaries, saying no, eliminating some things from your schedule  
Grief and loss – seeking support, journaling, finding enjoyable activities to fill your day 
Stressful situation:
How can this situation be changed or improved? Give some explanation. How will you gain your aim?
(Note: ask participants to share their answers; ask participants to make groups of three, let every group
choose one stressful situation and to give some useful solutions for them; ask every group to share their solution)
Explain to participants (5 minutes)
It is important to use a variety of coping strategies to manage stress that inevitably will occur. By reg-
ularly practicing coping strategies, you can stop stress from building up and prevent stress overload. Not
all stressful situations are within our control, and not every situation can be changed. Effective, healthy
coping skills can allow you to get through difficult times.
Generally, there are three approach to manage your stress:
1. Manage stressors, for example:
POTENTIAL STRESSOR MODIFIED STRESSOR
A crowded commute Leaving home earlier or later
Constant lateness Learning time-management skills
A cluttered home Becoming better organized
High credit-card bills Spending less
Missed deadline Starting projects sooner
2. Changing your thoughts
3. Manage your stress responses (relaxing your body and quiet your mind)
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Manage your stress responses (40 minutes)
Now, we will show you how to relax your body and calm your mind.
Give a short explanation: When we hear the word relaxation, we tend to think of activities that take
our minds off the stresses in our lives: watching TV, reading a good book, listening a music, taking a nap
— anything that might take us out of our world of worry, fear, and concern. But learning to relax means
acquiring specific relaxation skills that can help you to reduce bodily tension in a direct and systematic way.
These approaches focus more directly on releasing muscle tension.
Our mind and body are far more interconnected than we might think. Separating the two isn’t easy.
When our mind tells us “you’re worried” or “you’re feeling anxious” or “you’re afraid,” our body hears
this, as well. In turn, our body can become anxious and fearful. Our emotional distress (in our mind) is
converted to physical distress (in our body). So, if we’re worried, our body may become tense and we
may start breathing faster. This process can also work the other way around. If our body is stressed, our
mind can interpret those physical states as stress, and we can become agitated or worried. That’s why
relaxing our body reduces not only bodily tension but also mental distress.
The following is a short list of some of the effects tension has on our body:
• Neck pain
• Headaches
• Stomach cramps
• Lower-back pain
• Teeth grinding
• Sore shoulders
• Muscle spasms
• Tremors or twitches
• …
• Scan your body and do your breath awareness
One of the ways to recognize bodily tension is to use this simple one-minute scanning exercise. Find a
place where you can sit or lie down comfortably and be undisturbed for a moment or two Scan your body
for any muscle tension. Start with the top of your head and work your way down to your toes. Ask yourself:
- Am I furrowing my brow?
- Am I knitting my eyebrows?
- Am I clenching my jaw?
- Am I pursing my lips?
- Am I hunching my shoulders?
- Am I feeling tension in my arms?
- Am I feeling tightness in my thigh and calf muscles?
- Am I curling my toes?
- Do I notice any discomfort anywhere else in my body?
• After this quick exercise, let’s raise awareness of our breathing.
Close your eyes, put one hand on your abdomen, and other hand on your chest.
Don’t try to change your breathing; just notice how you are breathing – which hand is rising the most
when you inhale (hand on you abdomen or hand on your chest?)
If your abdomen is raising more, you are breathing from your diaphragm; if your chest is moving more
than your abdomen, then you are breathing from your chest. The trick is to switch that – to breath from
your abdomen, not form your chest.
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Try that once again – try to breath from the abdomen, not from the chest.
• Here is one of the simplest ways to teaching yourself to stress-effective breathing.
1. Either lying or sitting comfortably, put one hand on your belly and the other hand on your chest
2. Inhale through your nose, making sure that the hand on your belly rises and the hand on your chest
moves hardly at all.
3. As you inhale slowly, count silently to three.
4. As you exhale through your parted lips slowly, count silently to four, feeling the hand on your belly
falling gently.
Pause slightly before your next breath.
Continue to breathe like this until you feel completely relaxed.
• „Belly-button balloon” breathing
1. Imagine that a small balloon — about the size of a grapefruit — is replacing your stomach, just
under your belly button.
2. As you inhale through your nose, imagine that you’re actually inhaling through your belly button,
inflating this once-empty balloon. This balloon is small, so don’t overinflate it. As the balloon gets larger,
notice how your belly rises.
3. Exhale slowly through your nose or mouth, again imagining that the air is leaving through your belly
button. Your balloon is now slowly and easily returning to its deflated state.
4. Pause slightly before the next breath in and then repeat, gently and smoothly inflating your balloon
to a comfortable size. Repeat this exercise, as often as you can, whenever you can.
• Emergency breathing
Breathing properly is no big deal when you’re lying on your bed. But what’s your breathing like when
you’re caught in gridlock, when you’re facing down a deadline?
You’re now in crisis mode. You need another form of breathing.
1. Inhale slowly through your nostrils, taking in a very deep diaphragmatic breath, filling your lungs and
filling your cheeks.
2. Hold breath for about six seconds.
3. Exhale slowly through your slightly parted lips, releasing all the air in your lungs. Pause at the end of
this exhalation.
Now take a few “normal” breaths.
Repeat Steps 1 through 3 two or three times and then return to what you were doing. This form of
deep breathing should put you in a more relaxed state.
• Progressive relaxation
Begin progressive relaxation by tensing a specific muscle or group of muscles (arms, legs, shoulders,
and so on). Hold that tension for about ten seconds and then let it go, replacing that tension with some-
thing much more pleasant — relaxation. By the time you tense and relax most of your major muscle
groups, you feel relaxed, and much less stressed.
1. Lie down or sit, as comfortably as you can, and close your eyes. Find a quiet place that gives you
some privacy.
2. Tense the muscles of a particular body part. To practice, start by tensing your right hand and arm.
3. Hold the tension in the body part for about seven seconds.
4. Let go of the tension quickly, letting the muscles go limp.
Notice the difference in the way your hand and arm feel. Notice the difference between the sensa-
tions of tension and those of relaxation.
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5. Repeat Steps 1 through 4, using the same muscle group.
6. Move to another muscle group.
Simply repeat Steps 1 through 4, substituting a different muscle group each time. Continue with your
left hand and arm and then work your way through the major muscle groups.
Imagine that you’re preparing yourself for a punch to the stomach. Hold that tension. And relax,
letting go of the tension. After you finish this sequence, let your body sink into an even deeper state of
relaxation. Let go more and more. Mentally go over the sensations you’re feeling in your arms, face, neck,
shoulders, back, stomach, and legs. Feel your body becoming more relaxed. Savour the feeling.
• Autogenic training
Give a short explanation: This method attempts to regulate your autonomic nervous functions and
more specifically your parasympathetic nervous system (your heart rate, blood pressure, and breathing,
among others) rather than relaxing your muscles. With autogenic training, you use your mind to regulate
your body’s internal stress levels. Autogenic training relies on the power of suggestion to induce physi-
ological changes. These suggestions are mental images that your subconscious picks up and transmits to
your body. Just thinking about certain changes in your body produces those kinds of changes. As a result,
you experience deep feelings of relaxation.
Here’s what you do:
1. Get comfy. You can sit or lie down, but make sure your body is well supported and as comfortable
as possible. Try to breathe slowly and smoothly.
2. Concentrate passively. For this approach to be effective, you need to adopt a receptive, casual attitude
of passive concentration. You want to be alert, not falling asleep but not asking your mind to work too hard.
You can’t force yourself to relax. Just let it happen. Be aware of your body and your mind, but don’t actively
analyse everything or worry about how you’re doing. Should a distracting thought come your way, notice it
and then let it go. If the relaxation doesn’t come at first, don’t worry. It comes with more practice.
3. Allow various body parts to begin feeling warm and heavy. Although autogenic training utilizes many
suggestions and images, the two most effective images are warmth and heaviness. Start by focusing on your
right arm. Now slowly and softly say to yourself: I am calm . . . I am at peace . . . My right arm is warm . . . and
heavy . . . My right arm is warm . . . and heavy . . . My right arm is warm . . . and heavy . . . I can feel the warmth
and heaviness flowing into my right arm. . . I can feel my right arm becoming warmer . . . and heavier . . . I can
feel my right arm becoming warmer . . . and heavier . . . I can feel my right arm becoming warmer . . . and
heavier . . . I am at peace . . . I am calm . . . I am at peace . . . I am calm.
Take the time to become aware of the feelings in your arm and hand. Notice that your arm is be-
coming warmer and heavier. Don’t rush this process. Enjoy the changes your body is now beginning to
experience.
4. After you complete the phrases, remain silent and calm for about 30 seconds, letting the relaxation deep-
en; then focus on your left arm. Repeat the same phrases again, this time substituting left arm for right arm.
5. Move to other parts of your body. Focus on other areas, repeating the same phrases but substitut-
ing other parts of your body. Here is the complete sequence: right arm, left arm, both arms, right leg, left
leg, both legs, neck and shoulders, chest and abdomen, and finally your entire body.
• Quieting Your Mind
Give a short explanations: Your mind is constantly working. Sometimes it races, sometimes it slows,
but it rarely stops. Even when you’re sleeping, the wheels are turning. You may be worrying about work,
your relationships, your finances, or simply how you’re going to juggle the hundred and one things on your
plate. Whatever the source of your worry or distress, you clearly aren’t going to relax until you stop — or
at least slow — this mental mayhem.
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Simply saying to yourself, “I will absolutely not think about this stuff anymore!” rarely works. Suppress-
ing unwanted thoughts by willing them away is tough to do. Remember when a friend challenged you:
“Don’t think about pink elephants”? Barely are the words out of your friend’s mouth when a herd of
pinkish elephants fills your mind. The harder you try to will yourself not to think of something, the more
likely it is that you in fact will think of that something.
Sometimes an unwanted thought or worry grabs you and won’t let go. Maybe you’re trying to fall
asleep, and the thoughts racing around in your head make sleeping impossible.
Technique called thought stopping can be useful. It’s an effective way of keeping repetitive worries and
upsets temporarily out of your mind, and it’s also effective in weakening those thoughts, making it less likely
that they’ll return. Concentrating on two things at the same time is hard. So if your mind is flooded with dis-
tressing thoughts, change course. Find something else, a “wanted” thought you actually enjoy thinking about.
Let’s practice:
1. Write down your unwanted thoughts. On a piece of paper, write down three or four thoughts that
repeatedly trigger distress. It could be an upsetting memory, a future fear or an imagined anxiety.
2. Think of some pleasant replacement thoughts. Write down three or four pleasant, happy thoughts
you may have, such as taking a great vacation, achieving a long-term goal — any pleasant experience, past
or future. Keep these pleasant thoughts in your memory so you can easily bring them into consciousness.
3. Focus on an unwanted thought. Find a place where you’ll be undisturbed.
Sitting or lying comfortably, take some deep breaths and relax your body as much as you can. Close your
eyes and select one of your unwanted thoughts. (Don’t choose your most distressing thought at the beginning).
Get into your distressing thought using all your senses — what it looks like, feels like, and so on. Hold
onto that unwanted thought for a bit.
4. Yell “stop!” Now (and this may sound a bit strange) yell out the word “stop.” At the same time,
picture a red-and-white hexagonal stop sign. Make your sign large and vivid.
5. Replace that thought. Replace that unwanted thought with one of your pleasant thoughts. Mentally
shift your attention to that positive image and feeling. Immerse yourself in this replacement thought,
strengthening it with visual images, sounds, and maybe even smells and tastes.
6. Repeat this process. Do this again with the same unwanted thought. Then try it with another un-
wanted thought. If your pleasant replacement thought loses some of its potency, use one of your others.
After you get better at this, stop yelling “stop” and only yell the word in your head. You’re now ready to
put this into practice in real life.
The image of the sign and the vocal or silent “stop” will disrupt your thought sequence and temporari-
ly put the unwanted thought out of your mind. Be warned, however: It probably will return, and you may
have to repeat this sequence again. And again.
• Imagination
One of the best ways to calm your mind and stop those unwanted, persistent worries is to use your
imagination. If you can replace that stress-producing thought or image with one that is relaxing, chances
are you’ll feel much better.
1. Find a place where you won’t be disturbed for a few minutes and get comfortable, either sitting in
a chair or lying down.
2. Think of an image — a place, a scene, or a memory — that relaxes you. Use all of your senses to bring
that imagined scene to life. Ask yourself: What do I see? What can I hear? What can I smell? What can I feel?
3. Let yourself become completely immersed in your image, allowing it to relax you completely.
Try taking one of these mental vacations:
Imagine that you’re on the beach. The weather is perfect. Lying on the cool sand, you feel the warm
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breeze caress your body. You hear the lapping of the ocean waves on the shore and the birds chirping
in the palms. You’re slowly sipping your favourite drink. You feel wonderful. You’re relaxed. Your mind is
totally at peace.
Meditation
Prepare yourself for meditation
1. Find a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed for a while. No telephone, no mobile phone, no
TV — nothing.
2. Find a comfortable sitting position.
3. Focus on a sound, word, sensation, image, object, or thought.
4. Maintain your focus and adopt a passive, accepting attitude. When you’re focusing in meditation,
intrusive thoughts or images may enter your mind and distract you. When those thoughts occur, no-
tice them, accept the fact that they’re there, and then let them go: No getting upset, no annoyance, no
self-rebuke. Try not to get hung up on the timing. Meditate for about fifteen or twenty minutes. If you
find you’re becoming uncomfortable, you can stop and try it again another time. Remember, this is a
non-pressured exercise. After you have everything in place, you’re ready to begin meditating.
Meditative breathing
Breath-counting meditation is one of the most basic and commonly used forms of meditation.
1. Sit comfortably. You can position yourself on the floor or in a chair. Keep your back straight and
your head up. Dress comfortably, as well — no tight shoes, belt, necktie, underpants, bra, or anything
else that constricts you.
2. Close your eyes and scan for tension. Scan your body for any tension by using the one-minute body-
scan technique you did before, and then let go of any tension that you find.
3. Begin to breathe in a relaxed way. Relax by taking some abdominal breaths (breathing using your
diaphragm). Breathe slowly and deeply through your nose. To help you breathe in a relaxing manner,
imagine a small balloon just under your belly button. As you inhale through your nostrils, imagine that
balloon gently inflating; as you exhale through your nostrils, imagine the balloon slowly deflating.
4. Focus on your breathing. Your breathing now becomes the object of your focus. When you in-
hale, count this breath as “one.” The next time you inhale is two, and so forth until you reach ten. Then
you start again at one. Count silently to yourself, and if you lose count, simply start back at one. If you
lose count, don’t worry — the number is merely something to focus on. There’s no right or wrong
number here.
5. If you find a distracting thought or image intruding, let it go and return to your count.
• Now, we are going to out some mantra. Mantra usually needs to be personal. It will help you to be
more focused. A mantra is a sound or word that you repeat; it can help you focus your mind and avoid
distractions. After you select your mantra do this:
1. Sit quietly, either in a chair or on the floor. Eliminate any distractions. Close your eyes and relax as
much as you can.
2. Start with some deep breathing and try to clear your mind of the day’s hassle and worry. Remem-
ber not to breathe with your chest alone. Breathe until you notice that you feel much more relaxed.
3. Do a body scan to see where any residual tension may be hiding
4. Focus on your breathing and begin to repeat your mantra to yourself, either repeating it silently or
chanting it softly. As you say your mantra, see the word in your head. Repeat your mantra over and over.
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Find a timing and rhythm that is comfortable for you. As before, if you find your concentration slipping,
simply become aware of that fact and gently guide your mind back to your mantra.
Do this exercise for about 20 minutes or so and try to squeeze in as many meditative sessions as you
can in your week.
Mindfulness
Give a short explanation: The origins of mindfulness can be traced back to Hindu and Buddhist writ-
ings. The word itself is a translation of the ancient East Indian word sati, meaning “awareness,” and Buddha
considered it to be an important factor on the path to enlightenment. The concept of awareness remains
an important part of our understanding of how a mindful approach to life can help us manage our stress.
Mindfulness is about being fully aware in the present moment. Being mindful means attending to your
immediate experience; detaching from your thoughts and feelings; viewing them with a sense of openness,
curiosity, and compassion; and accepting them without judgment. Mastering mindfulness means training
yourself to sustain your focus on whatever becomes the object of your attention. Mindfulness means be-
ing in the moment, being in the present, being aware. Rather than looking at your world with judgmental
constructs, such as good-bad, right-wrong, like-dislike, and so on, you can begin looking at your world
more openly and with more acceptance. Much of your stress comes from a lack of awareness. Your mind
is constantly processing thoughts, feelings, sensations, and behaviours that have happened in the past or
may happen in the future. You can easily get overwhelmed by all the activity and become a prisoner of
your worries, fears, angers, and upsets. While much of this processing is conscious, much of your thinking
and feeling is automatic. If you can step back and gain more awareness of what your mind is doing, you can
cope with your stress more effectively. Mindfulness is a valuable way of doing just that.
For now, here’s a simple exercise that will take only a moment or two and will give you a sense of what
mindfulness is like.
1. Stop whatever else you’re doing, take a deep breath, and try to become more relaxed.
2. Now, take a book in both of your hands (or some other object). Try to become aware of the book
as if it’s the first time you’ve ever seen a book. Become curious, wanting to know more about this thing
called a book. Holding it in your hands, gently focus all of your attention on the book.
3. Focus on the weight of the book in your hands. Does it feel light or heavy?
4. Notice the texture of the paper by rubbing your fingers over a page. Does it feel totally smooth, or
can you feel some roughness?
5. Without reading the text, pay attention to the print — the types of fonts used, the size of the print,
and the word patterns.
6. Look at the cover of the book and notice the different colours and designs. Notice the way light is
reflected on the cover. Now feel the cover of the book. Running your fingers over the cover, notice its
glossy smoothness.
There was no analysis, no over-thinking, just observation. Your awareness was focused; you were in
the moment. This ability allows you to detach from your world of automatic thinking, feeling, and be-
having. This detachment puts you in an accepting, non-judgmental frame of mind, where you choose to
simply be. You can use this frame of mind as a base for exploring better ways of coping with your stress.
• For this exercise we need a candies, or nuts, or fruit, or some other food that is available.
This exercise is a simple way to demonstrate what it means to become more mindful in daily life. This
takes only about five minutes. It involves eating a piece of food mindfully.
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Mindfully Eating a Raisin/Nuts It is clear to see how this kind of thinking might bring your mood and confidence levels down.
As you do this practice, put aside all distractions, turn off the phone, and focus direct, clear awareness Do you ever think in any of the ways outlined above? Fill in your examples below (You might find it
on each aspect and each moment of the experience. difficult to identify an unhelpful thought. Try thinking about a time when you felt particularly stressed.
Place a few raisins in your hand. Imagine that you have just come to Earth from a distant planet without Consider what was running through your mind at that time):
such food. Now, with this food in hand, you can begin to explore it with all of your senses. Focus on one
of the objects as if you’ve never seen anything like it before. Focus on seeing this object. Scan it, exploring
every part of it, as if you’ve never seen such a thing before. Turn it around with your fingers and notice
what colour it is. Notice the folds and where the surface reflects light or becomes darker. Next, explore
the texture, feeling any softness, hardness, coarseness, or smoothness. While you’re doing this, if thoughts
arise such as “Why am I doing this weird exercise?” “How will this ever help me?” or “I hate these ob-
jects,” then just see if you can acknowledge these thoughts, let them be, and then bring your awareness
back to the object. Take the object beneath your nose and carefully notice the smell of it. Bring the object
to one ear, squeeze it, roll it around, and hear if there is any sound coming from it. Begin to slowly take
the object to your mouth, noticing how the arm knows exactly where to go and perhaps becoming aware
of your mouth watering. Gently place the object in your mouth, on your tongue, without biting it. Simply
explore the sensations of this object in your mouth. When you’re ready, intentionally bite down on the Remember the participant what kind of unhelpful thoughts are (Lecture in Block One).
object, maybe noticing how it automatically goes to one side of the mouth versus the other. Also notice Then ask them to write down some of their unhelpful thoughts and to categorized them (for example:
the tastes it releases. Slowly chew this object. Be aware of the saliva in your mouth and how the object Over-generalising, catastrophizing, black and white thinking…)
changes in consistency as you chew. When you feel ready to swallow, consciously notice the intention
to swallow, then see if you can notice the sensations of swallowing the raisin, sensing it moving down to UNHELPFUL THOUGHTS CATEGORY
your throat on its way to your stomach. Take a moment to congratulate yourself for taking this time to I’m a loser Labelling
experience mindful eating.
Ask yourself:What did you notice with the raisin (or whatever food) in terms of sight, touch,
sound, smell, and taste? Was anything surprising? Did any thoughts or memories pop up while
doing this practice? Take a few moments to write down your reflections. Share your experience
with other participants.

Challenging unhelpful thoughts (30 minutes)

Give a short explanation: The way that we think about things has an impact on our stress How to challenge unhelpful thoughts
levels. Many of these thoughts occur outside of our control, and can be negative or unhelpful. It is
therefore important to remember that they are just thoughts, without any real basis, and are not Give a short explanation: Once you have recognised an unhelpful thought the next stage is to chal-
necessarily facts. Even though we may believe a lot of our unhelpful thoughts when we are feeling lenge it. To do this, you can ask yourself a serious of questions.
stressed, it is good to remember that they should be questioned as they are often based on wrong See the example below:
assumptions. Situation: Deadline approaching for piece of work.
You might have unhelpful thoughts about all kinds of things. Here are some examples: How you feel: Overwhelmed, irritable, on edge, worried, angry. Unhelpful thought: I should have start-
About Yourself / Your Actions and Thoughts: ed this work sooner. I’ll never finish it in time!
–– I’m not able to cope Now you can challenge your unhelpful thoughts by asking these questions.
–– I’m weak because I can’t manage Is there any evidence that contradicts this thought?
–– I can’t do anything more –– I’ve always done a good job at my work before.
–– I don’t feel like I have any control –– I’ve met deadlines on time in the past.
About the Future: Can you identify any of the patterns of unhelpful thinking described earlier?
–– I don’t see an end to this - Catastrophizing.
–– I’m destined to fail - Should thinking.
–– What if I lose my job?

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What would you say to a friend who had this thought in a similar situation?
You still have time, just plan how to use your time best and get your head down.
What are the costs and benefits of thinking in this way?
Costs: I am likely to distract myself from getting the work done. It makes me anxious before I even
start the work. It puts me under even more pressure.
Benefits: I can’t think of any.
How will you feel about this in 6 months?
–– I’ll probably look back and laugh about how silly I was being.
Is there another way of looking at this situation?
–– I’ve always met deadlines in the past so I should be OK. I can only try my best. If I miss the deadline
then I can just turn in the work as soon as it is finished.
Once you have asked yourself these questions, you should read through your answers. Try to come
up with a more balanced or rational view.
For example:
I have met deadlines in the past and I am good at working quickly. I have plenty of time if I carefully
plan what I need to achieve.
Try to apply these questions to the unhelpful thoughts that you notice. It can help to improve your
mood and reduce your stress levels. You can use this technique to test your thoughts are realistic and
balanced.
Now, ask participants to do this exercise. After that, ask them to work in pairs, to discuss their an-
swers, to help each other to solve some problems that may come up.
UNHELPFUL THOUGHT
CHALLENGES
1. Is there any evidence that contradicts this thought?
2. Can you identify any patterns of unhelpful thoughts?
3. What would you say to a friend who had this thought in the same situation?
4. What are the costs and benefits of thinking in this way?
a. Cost:
b. Benefits:
5. How will you feel about this in 6 months?
6. Is there another way of looking at this situation?
BALANCED THOUGHT
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Stress management
And, for the end of this workshop, let’s do practice Happiness
(couple of minutes)
(for this practice, you will need paper and pen)
Sit comfortably and feel your own heaviness. Exhale tension and direct your thoughts toward a happy
moment of life. Look around and focus on happy moment and people who brought you a happiness and
joy. Remember the joyful feelings. Imagine yourself as you looked then, as you are whenever you are
happy and full of joy. Pay attention to the words that coming, open your eyes and write them...
Put a piece of paper on which you wrote down the words in your pocket, bag ... and whenever you
feel sad, read those words, it will give you the energy to explore all possible ways to solve a problem that
you have.
Print this and give to your participant:
It is good to be remembered:
 Improve time management skills by organizing your day, creating a balanced schedule, not overcom-
mitting yourself, leaving home earlier in the morning and planning regular breaks. Reduce meeting
time – set time limits, plan an agenda and stick to it. You will feel less overwhelmed.
Improve task management by prioritizing tasks, breaking projects into small steps, delegating re-

sponsibility and being willing to compromise.
Improve emotional intelligence -the ability to manage and use your emotions in positive and con-

structive ways. Communicate with others in ways that draw people to you, overcome differences,
repair wounded feelings and defuse tension and stress.
Break bad habits, negative thoughts and behaviour, which add to your stress at work: resist perfec-

tionism; clean up your act; flip your negative thinking and do not try to control the uncontrollable,
particularly the behaviour of other people.
Identify things that are working well, celebrate successes and meet challenges with humour. Laugh

often!
Keep things in perspective. Find ways to balance work and family life. Take care of yourself– eat

healthy, keep fit and sleep enough.
Speak to your manager or someone else you feel comfortable talking to in your organization if

you are feeling stressed at work. In some situations, simply sharing your thoughts and feelings with
someone you trust can help reduce stress. If it is work-related, your line manager has a duty to
take reasonable steps to try to resolve the problem.
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 UNIT III.
Cooperation
and
communication
with the
biological family

ƒƒ THE CHILD’S ATTACHMENT TO THE

BIOLOGICAL FAMILY – THE IMPORTANCE OF
THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN THE CHILD AND
HIS/HER BIOLOGICAL FAMILY
ƒƒ THE PERSPECTIVE OF THE BIOLOGICAL PARENTS
ƒƒ PROMOTING A GOOD RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN
THE CHILD AND THE BIOLOGICAL FAMILY

Source: pixab ay.com

U N IT III . COOPER ATION AN D COM M U N IC ATION WITH THE B IOLOGIC AL FAM ILY

LEARNING By successfully completing this module, participants will understand and accept III.1.
OUTCOMES the importance of the relationship between the child and the biological family. The
participants will become able to understand and adequately handle the behavior of The child’s attachment to the biological family
the parents and the children during and after visitations. Participants will learn how to
encourage positive identity and personality development in the child. The importance of the relationship between the child and
COMPETENCIES effective communication; building relationships; cooperation; verbal and non-verbal his/her biological family
TARGETED messages; conflict resolution methods; empathy; accepting cultural differences;
equal treatment; developing tolerance; developing assertiveness; accepting individual
differences; ability to examine situations from different perspectives, realizing similarities
between each other LEARNING Participants will be able to accept the child’s relationship with the biological parents
TIME FRAME 8 hours OUTCOMES and other relatives.
Participants will understand the importance of this relationship, they will be able to
ACTIVITIES discussions, exchange of experience, role-playing exercises
recognize its effect on personality development.
PROPOSED
Participants will be able to get an insight into loyalty conflicts experienced by the
MATERIALS/ textbook, video materials, flipchart, projector
child resulting from opposing expectations toward him or her.
MEDIA NEEDED
CONTENT –– Legal and psychological reasons for visitation and regulation
TARGET GROUP Educators, carers, foster parents
DESCRIPTION –– The importance of attachment toward biological relatives, its effects on
positive personality development and identity development
Children living under care are separated from their biological family only physically, but not emotionally. –– Risks of loyalty conflicts and opposing expectations toward the child
Even if they are treated much better and experience more suitable circumstances than in their bio- –– The effects of the quality of visitations on the child’s self-confidence, chances
logical family, a special emotional bond exsists between the children and their biological parents, which of returning to the biological family, and chances for adoption
can be hurt, but never breaks. Even if they have been living out of their family, it is extremely important TIME FRAME 2 teaching hours
for them to have a good relationship with their biological family, because the lack of this risks their mental METHODS/ short theoretical lectures, role-playing exercises, exchange of experience,
health. It is important for every child to familiarize themselves with their past, as this is essential to the ACTIVITIES discussions
child’s identity, emotional security and healthy development.
For this reason this whole unit deals with cooperation and communication with the biological family.
MATERIALS/ handout, flipchart table
MEDIA NEEDED
The first subunit emphasises the importance of maintaining contact with the biological parents. The
second subunit examines the issue from the point of the biological parents. It highlights the possible diffi- NUMBER OF 15 participants
culities in building and maintaining good relationship. PARTICIPANTS
The third subunit deals with the process of maintaining contact from the very beginning up until
handling emotional reactions arising. It discovers how children and their parents can be helped in the Before elaborating the first topic of this chapter, we must provide a brief overview of the psycholog-
formaton and maintenance of a substantial quality relationship. ical effects of early attachment.

What do we call early attachment?

To put it in simple terms, early attachment is a strong emotional bond that connects the year-old baby
with its mother, sometimes referred to as an “invisible umbilical cord”. It develops at the age of 1-1.5 years.
A year-old child already has a great thirst to discover the outside world. However, it is also afraid of
the several novelties and seeks the security provided by the nearness of the mother. These two opposite
pulling forces – detachment and nearness – spawn tension that manifests itself especially in unfamiliar
surroundings. This provides the basis of the method developed for observing attachment behavior, based
on which children can be categorized into four attachment groups:
– one securely attached group; and
– three unsurely attached (evasive, resistant, and so-called disorganized) groups

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Children belonging to each of the different groups choose different solutions to environmental chal-
lenges. However, we cannot say that children belonging to one group attach “better”, “worse”, “more
strongly”, or “more weakly” compared to others.
A secure attachment provides the best basis for a child to develop a balanced, brave, and open atti-
tude towards the outside world, all the while knowing that in case of any issue his mother will immediately
provide relief, safety, and consolation.
However, the majority of children living under the care of the child protection system can be grouped
into one of the following three types of attachment.
What are unsurely attached children like?
Evasive attachment forms when the mother retreats from fulfilling the needs of the baby, and lets it
handle its unrest and negative emotions by itself. These babies receive less tender physical contact and
consolation, making them learn to obscure their emotions rather quickly.
Resistant attachment is common among children of mothers who are less consistent in the treatment
of their child, sometimes reacting sensitively, while on other occasions being slow to react. These babies
therefore seek the parent’s attention, provide strong signals even in case of light stress, and have a hard
time calming down in the presence of the mother.
Children with a disorganized attachment are unable to adapt to the way their mother treats them,
neither by obscuring their emotions, nor by amplifying their cries, making it the least optimal type of at-
tachment. They find it more difficult to cope with stress or unfamiliar situations than those belonging to
other groups. Several studies have found that early-disorganized attachment is not beneficial to the future
emotional and social development of the child.
Is it possible that attachment doesn’t develop at all?
It is very rare for a baby to not have at least an early attachment relationship. An attachment always
develops if there is a regular connection between the baby and someone who is caring for them, be it
the mother, father, grandparent, or foster parent.
Early attachment between the mother and the baby mainly has an effect on certain aspects of social and
emotional development, such as friendships, strong peer relationships, and romantic relationships during adoles-
cence. Evasive children are prone to becoming aggressive, while resistant children tend to become introverted in
a community setting. A secure attachment only provides a foundation for social relationships, but does not uncon-
ditionally define them.
It is evident to every child protection expert that the main goal of institutional care is to guide the child
back home through education. This is only possible if the relationship with the biological parents is not
severed by the fact that the child is being raised outside the family.
The legal justification and regulation of maintaining contact
The United Nations New York Treaty governing children’s rights stipulates that participating states
must respect the right of children separated from one or both of their parents to maintain a personal
relationship and direct contact with both of their parents, except if this goes against the primary interests
of the child.
It is within the capacity of the child support authority to make decisions regarding the child’s right to
maintain contact with the eligible parent, grandparent, adult sibling, or the sibling of either of the parents
in the event that parents and grandparents have passed away, are unable or unwilling to make contact.
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The child’s attachment to the biological family
The moderation and re-moderation of the degree of contact can also be requested by children with
limited capacity. The educator of a child cared for by the child protection system can allow the child to
maintain personal contact with people other than those legally eligible. In case of a dispute between the
educator and the child, the authority will decide on the matter of maintaining contact.
The child support authority can restrict, suspend, or withdraw the right to maintain contact of those
eligible in case they maintain contact in a way that is against regulations, or misuse it in a way that harms
the child, thereby endangering their development. The authority can also temporarily restrict the means
of maintaining contact with relatives in case of children under educational supervision.
The importance of blood relations and attachments with regard to the child’s healthy personality
development and the formation of their identity
In Hungary in the past (until the year of 1997 when the new Child Protection Law came into force)
parents were not encouraged to keep contact with their children living in foster families. They were told
that their children got used to the foster families, live in peace and harmony and should not be bothered.
Parents gave it up and have lost contact with their children.
Many children were being raised without knowing their parents, without any memory about their
past and their roots. Everything seemed to be all right, these children seemed to be happy, balanced and
restful.
However, when they have reached the age of adolescence, they started to look for their parents, be-
cause they could not find their identity without knowing their roots. In this process they often experience
trauma, shock, disappointment and lots of them could not cope with all this new information.
EXERCISE 1
The following case illustrates this problem:
An 18 year old girl, Kati has been raised by a foster mother since the age of 2. Their parents have led
a criminal life, spent lots of time in prison. They wrote letters several times to their daughter, but she did
not want to answer, so they have never met. Kati did not want to know anything about her biological
family, she felt and said several times that now she belongs to the foster family. She had a very good
relationship with her foster mother.
One afternoon when Kati arrived home from school, a women and a young boy was waiting for her
in front of their house. Kati’s mother and brother came to meet her…
Work in small groups:
–– Discuss what Kati could have been felt when she first saw her family.
–– Guess how the story continued…
Kati was shocked, frightened and excited at the same time. She started talking to her mother and
brother. So many questions she had! After a while, they went walking to a park. Kati went home late in
this evening. The second day she met again her mother, spent together the all afternoon. On the third
day Kati did not go to school. On the fourth day she did not go home, spent the night with her family.
–– Discuss how her foster mother could have react
–– Discuss the reasons why Kati insisted on to her biological family
–– Guess how the story continued
Her foster mother was shocked and disappointed. Despite her feelings she was able to show tolerance,
patience and empathy in this situation. She did not force Kati to choose between her “two mothers”. Af-
ter three weeks Kati disappointed in her biological parents and did not want to meet them again and her
relationship with her foster mother returned to normal. It took month for Kati to recover from the sock.
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EXERCISE 2:
Discuss together with the participants the importance of maintaining contact in the case of foster children!
–– Continuity and emotional security are two important and fundamental needs of children
–– „The basis of mental health is the healthy development of a self-image and self-awareness. The
development of self-awareness requires continuity between the past and “myself”. If the child has
to forget their past, it puts their mental health in jeopardy.” (Alíz Hermann)
CONTINUITY SELF-IDENTITY
ƒƒ Safety ƒƒ Being familiar with blood relatives
ƒƒ Feeling of belonging somewhere, ƒƒ Being familiar with past relationships attachment
ƒƒ Family-like lifestyle ƒƒ Being familiar with the correlation between
(preparation for family life) past and present
ƒƒ The experience of loving relationships ƒƒ Appropriate relationships with people from
ƒƒ Learning the capability of showing love the past
The regularity of maintaining contact has an effect on the child’s personality development and impacts
the child-parent relationship, thereby defining the chances and success of guiding the child back home
through education.
The dangers of loyalty conflicts, and the issue of dual education
A loyalty conflict occurs when the child has to choose between their biological and foster families.
Conflicts between the foster family and the biological family are a common issue when maintaining
contact, and can have the appearance of a confrontation in the form of tearing up old emotional wounds,
and making unrealistic promises regarding the future. This is a clear result of the rivalry situation be-
tween the biological and foster parents who are given unequal conditions. This does not help the child
cope with the loyalty conflict, or the feeling of dual origin. The child experiences that maintaining a good
relationship with one of them means withdrawal from the other, as well as offending them. This spawns
a feeling of guilt, which can be felt throughout all of these connections. They might even think that they
are responsible for their separation from the family (“maybe they took me/abandoned me because of
my wrongdoings”).
The love of both the biological and foster parents is essential for the child’s healthy development. It is
very difficult for them to feel that the two parties are mad at each other. The only thing that causes even
more damage is when biological and foster parents ask the child to choose sides in a particular issue.
The following exercise helps participants to experience the nature of loyalty-conflicts:
EXERCISE 3:
Imagine that a ship is sinking. Lots of passangers are in danger, but there is only one place left in
the lifeboat. Discuss in pairs who would you save among the following passangers?
– a two-year old girl
– a little boy having serious illness
– a famous doctor
– a mother, having six children
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The child’s attachment to the biological family
Now discuss what you have felt while making this decision.
The extended presence of a loyalty conflict can have several negative effects:
–– it undermines the child’s sense of security
–– the child is unwilling and afraid to trust neither their biological nor their foster parents
–– anxiety
–– behavioral issues
–– guilt, self-blame, damage to self-identity
–– identity disorder, damaged self-esteem
Ask the participants to give examples based on their own experience of situations where the
educational principles of the biological parents greatly differed from their own.
In what specific situations was this manifested?
How did the child react to these situations?
How did the foster parent/educator handle the conflict?
–– doesn’t know whose rules to adhere to, gets confused by conflicting information
–– perceives as if there were no rules at all
–– comes with an intense feeling of uncertainty
–– fears that if he adheres to one’s principles, the other will be hurt/insulted
–– dual education à leads to behavioral disorders
 Don’t raise the child against their biological parents!!!
 Don’t discuss conflicts with the biological parents in front of the child.
 Respect the behavior of the biological parents within certain limits during occasions of contact
(e.g. if we believe that the child can only have sweets after eating the hot meal, but the biological
parent gives lots of sweets to the child before eating).
What difficulties may arise in the foster parent – parent relationship?
It is not a question of professional or human adequacy that the educators/foster parents, and other
child protection experts need to consciously strive for the acceptance of the biological parents. We
would like to highlight three factors, which unconsciously skewer the parents’ perception and result in a
negative attitude.
1) Parents living on the edge of society represent values, which are not only far away from, but also
oppose the set of values present in qualified professionals (mostly belonging to the middle class).
The collision of values is the cause of a number of interpersonal conflicts, as our set of values de-
fines our identity. Any attack against it affects us emotionally, and easily spawns feelings of rejection
and resentment.
2) Individuals whose children are taken into institutional care have failed as parents: the family, which is
supposed to provide security and protection has itself become the primary source of danger. Aside
from abusive parents, those who are neglecting, addicted, and lead a deviant lifestyle – providing
a bad example for their children – can also spark feelings of indignation, blame, and rage in social
workers (“people like this don’t even deserve to be called a mother”)
3) Even if requested by the parents themselves, the separation of the child from the family spawns
intense feelings of anger in the parents. These feelings are commonly projected onto those working
in the child protection system as well as onto foster parents/educators. It is a natural consequence
in such cases for the biological parents to face the foster parents with distrust and hostility, drawing
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attention to their mistakes and questioning their expertise and good faith. This hostile attitude
suffered by the foster parents/educators is often embedded within them and can taint their rela-
tionship in the long run.
To summarize: Until the child protection system accepts only the children of families living on the edge
of society (regardless of whether it is a result of their own actions), it will be unable to fulfill its agenda!
The effects of the quality of visitation on the child’s self-esteem, adoption, and guid-
ing them back home through education
What are the factors that can make visitation more difficult?
ƒƒ If the parent-child relationship or the behavior of the parent was not adequate even before separa-
tion, bonds with the family can withstand only minimal strain, making it easy for the parent to “lag
behind” or start treating visits as just a formality.
ƒƒ Parents who are immature and unable to take responsibility are usually unwilling to make efforts to
better themselves, or to have their child brought back home to them. Especially after a year or two
they get used to the more comfortable situation.
ƒƒ As the parents are preoccupied with their own unsolvable problems and existential issues, they are
unable to tend to the needs of their children (i.e. to provide safety, express their love, keep their
promises).
Therefore in most cases there is a need for the active participation of professional care in order to
involve the parents and strengthen the maintained connections.
The restoration of the relationship between the child and the parent (either living, deceased, or un-
known), and the emotional acceptance of the parent are critical to the child’s personality development.
The feeling of belonging somewhere, and knowledge about one’s roots act as a safeguard to hold on to,
while accepting and respecting one’s ancestors and origin are a prerequisite of our own acceptance and
the development of a healthy self-esteem. Despite the best intentions of foster parents and educators,
a child who despises and rejects his mother or father will most certainly be unable to trust himself or
anyone else.
Maintaining contact with the biological parents is important not only because of future reintegration,
but because of its definitive role in the development of the child’s identity, making it the child’s fundamen-
tal interest.
Even despite the refusal of the child, it is the educator/foster parent who has a direct effect on the
child’s daily life, which is especially true in the case of foster families. This also has an effect on the child’s
relationship with their parents, even if not obvious at first.
Let’s think about how the foster parent and family, or those working at the children’s home can
aid the child’s connections with their blood relatives and therefore provide the basis for the success
of maintaining contact.
Reaffirmation of the parent’s parental role
The educator or foster parent regularly informs the biological parents of the child’s develop-
mental progress, and encourages them to help the child, thereby enabling them to understand his
situation. The parents have a right to know about important events in the life of the child, as well as
their development. Cooperation is only possible if there is no rivalry between the educator/foster
parent and the biological parent (who is the better parent, who has a stronger bond with the child).
The educator or foster parent must acknowledge the biological parents as parents, despite the fact
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The child’s attachment to the biological family
that they are the ones currently taking care of the child, and the parents’ right to custody has been
officially suspended. They must be acknowledged as parents even if they themselves or their cir-
cumstances are currently unsuitable/dangerous, and they have therefore failed as mother and father.
Whatever their past or present actions, it is the biological parents who gave birth to the child and
cared for him in their first few days/weeks/years. Therefore the child will always consider them his
real parents.
Accepting the idealized parent image
The educator or foster parent helps the child familiarize himself with his own life history. A com-
mon defense mechanism against the unbearable pain caused by trauma and losses among children
separated from their families is to “touch up” reality, idealize the past as well as their parents. They
cling to this fantasy until they become strong enough to face reality. The outside viewer only sees
that the child is living in a dream world, believes the parents’ unrealistic promises again and again,
refuses to accept the facts, etc. He therefore tries to enlighten the child in their own interest, as they
may feel that they are fighting for the child’s love with an unbeatable phantom (“It’s best if the child
knows what sort of people his parents really are!”).
Therefore getting to know one’s life history does not mean confrontation with the past/reality.
As everyone, the child also has the right to recall his own experiences (even with gaps and biases) in
the way he can best handle them. The best we can do to help is to have an honest interest and to
help them cope with reality with our acceptance.
Conveying the importance of parents to the child
The educator or foster parent encourages the child to maintain contact with their biological
family and relatives. Naturally, aggressive persuasion won’t lead to any results, and may seem like
empty preaching (especially if the educator deeply resents the parent). It can also spark feelings of
anger and the lack of being understood. The negative counterpart of an excessively positive parent
image is also present in the child, and is activated in case of every new disappointment. When the
child signals this, the educator usually tells him to stay quiet (“you can’t say things like that about
your mother”), further fueling his sense of guilt, against which he will inevitably apply some sort of
defense. Due to the ambivalent attitude of the child, educators (as well as professionals) can only
stress the importance of parents indirectly through their behavior.
Nowadays, every person working in the field of child protection acknowledges the importance of
keeping contact with biological parents. It is commonly accepted that it is important for every child
to familiarize themselves with their past, as this is essential to the child’s identity, emotional security,
and overall healthy development. Until now, the paradigm that trauma should be categorized into
two types was only present in theoretical pieces of work. However, it has now become part of the
commonly accepted professional framework of knowledge. The two types are absence and loss.
It is becoming more and more widely acknowledged that while absence leaves an empty space in
the child’s life, which can only be explored, loss can be coped with and processed with the help of
appropriate methods. If the child is missing information related to his biological parents, he will use
his fantasy to portray an idealized image of them. This can be either positive or negative, but we do
know that it is extreme by nature. The biological parent can be an ugly witch or a beautiful princess
in the mind of the child. One thing is for sure, that these fantasies spawn anxiety, as they lack any sort
of realistic basis. Unlike absence, loss can be processed and made part of the child’s life history. Al-
though loss always carries a negative interpretation, it can be integrated into the process of identity
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development. This is because a loss is specific, definable, realistic, and can be seen as a logical story III.2.
with the eyes of the child. In practice, this means that it is the best interest of the child to get to know
reality despite its controversial nature (i.e. get to know his biological parents).
In the real world, the acceptance of maintaining contact is not so straightforward. Children, par-
The perspective of the biological parents
ents, and foster parents alike face great difficulty even in the case of properly working relationships.
In addition to their own preparation, every foster parent/educator “brings” their own life history
and current mental state into these situations. This is an unavoidable fact, just as it is evident that you
can never fully prepare yourself for an emergency or trauma. Just think about the fact that we face LEARNING Participants will become able to accept, cooperate with, and work together
several losses during our lives, and still react with grief after each and every one. OUTCOMES with the biological family.
This is why it might occur that those foster parents who in theory support maintaining contact They will be able to recognize how different meanings can be attached to
with biological parents experience their appearance as a trauma at worst, or a shock at best (the the same messages.
apparent stress situation and crisis should be considered a natural human reaction). Participants will be able to recognize and consider the point of view of the
biological parents.
They will learn to ask for professional help if necessary.
CONTENT Assertive communication, building relationships
DESCRIPTION Possibilities for involving parents into tasks, building motivation
Ways of supporting the biological parents
Handling aggressive communication
Possibilities of professional help
TIME FRAME 3 teaching hours
METHODS/ short theoretical lectures, discussions, exchange of experience, case study,
ACTIVITIES small-group assignments
MATERIALS/ handout, flipchart table
MEDIA NEEDED
NUMBER OF 15 participants
PARTICIPANTS

In the previous section it has become clear why maintaining cotact with the biological parents
is extremely important to children. We will now take a look at this from the parents’ perspective.
We will discuss what difficulties can occur when communicating with the biological parents, what
are their causes, and how they can be prevented or minimized.
The act of separating the child from the family is a great trauma and loss in itself for the parents,
which is often further worsened by the circumstances and causes of separation.

EXERCISE 1.
Based on their professional experience, participants should collect the reasons
that can lead to a child being separated from their biological family.
Biological parents are full of negative emotions when their child is taken away from the family,
even if they were the ones who requested it because of their temporary inability to care for the
child. In such cases they lose control, are unable to influence their own fate, and unknown people
make decisions about their children. They often don’t have the opportunity to change their mind and

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take the child home, as the official procedures have to take place, and only afterwards can a decision
be made. They suffered a great loss, which they probably yet to have been able to digest, and will
have a negative effect on their whole lives, as well as their self-esteem.
The following exercise serves the deeper understanding and acceptance of their psychic state:
EXERCISE 2.
After forming small groups, the participants should discuss what parents might think and feel
just after having their child taken away from them. Give names to the children and define their
age as well! It is important that they put themselves in the perspective of the biological parents,
and say their thoughts in first person singular form.
A) The father left the family because of a quarrel, and the mother went out to get tinder in the
evening and didn’t want to take the children with her, so she left them at home. The neighbors called
the police, who took the children to the nearest temporary children’s home.
B) When escaping from an abusive father, the mother had nowhere to take the kids, so she re-
quested their temporary placement.
C) A little boy was admitted to the hospital, where the doctors determined that he is under-
nourished. The parents are not allowed to take him home, and he will be taken directly to foster
parents.
The below sentences may help summarize the group assignment (collect similar ones)
– rage, anger: „You can’t do this to us! You can’t tear a family apart! Give me back my child!” „The
neighbor’s children are starving all day and they are not the ones you are taking away.”
– uncertainty: „What will happen now, how and when will I get my child back?”
– confusion: „it’s my child after all, I should be able to decide what happens to him, or don’t I have
a say in it anymore? Why don’t they ask for my opinion? Everyone is so smart about what they need
to do, and I am left out of everything.”
– loss of self-confidence: „I have failed as a parent”.
– depression: „It doesn’t matter, it’s not like I can do anything.” „There is no need for me here
anymore.”
– feeling powerless, frustrated: „I can’t take my own child home, I don’t know what to do”
– defencelessness: „Unknown officers make decisions about our fate who don’t even know me
or my child.”
– guilt: „I was uanble to protect/care for my child.” „How could I let things go this far?”
– desperation: „Now this is really a big problem!”
– loss, grief
– shame, failure „Everyone can see that I have failed.”
– relief: „My child is finally safe, I don’t have to worry about him anymore.”
– hope: „Maybe once I can get him back.”
Filled with all these negative emotions, the parents arrive to the visitation session. They are very
happy to finally see their child! However, they find it difficult to accept the fact that the time, place,
and length of the session are all fixed. They don’t understand the reason for all of these restric-
tions, and feel that the system fears that they will harm their own child. It would only be natural to
them if they could see their child whenever they want and take him anywhere they want, as they
have been raising him until now. The situation is worsened by the fact that this is the first time they
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The perspective of the biological parents
meet the „enemy”, or in other words the first person onto whom they can project their feelings of
despair and rage (it is not always the case that they come into direct contact with decision makers).
Therefore the first visitation sessions are usually full of tension, which often manifests in the form
of aggression.
It should be considered that aggression – although difficult to handle – signals that the parent is
still fighting for their child. Those who calmly acknowledge the loss of their child have usually already
let go of their child previously.
EXERCISE 3.
The groups should further elaborate their stories and discuss the behavior and reactions
they can expect from the parents during the first visitation session!
If they have examples from personal experience, they can share them with the group and
apply them to the exercise.
Note down the desperate, negative, and hostile thoughts and sentences of the parents and
share with the broader group.
e.g.
– shouting, quarreling, verbal aggression
– suspicion (“Is the child being cared for properly? He looks so thin!”), interrogating the child
– jealousy (they will “love my child away”)
In case of children placed into foster families, attacks during visitation sessions can be even more
severe as the parent is pitted against a single person/family, and not an entire institution. It is also
easier to compare themselves to the foster parents (they are more successful in everything), and
jealousy is also more prevalent than when dealing with an impersonal institution. Parents fear that
after physical separation, they will lose their child emotionally as well. They nervously watch and
observe every little step and movement of the foster parents to find out how they are treating
the child. They are also uncertain as to how their child relates to them, whether he is mad at them,
misses them, or even still loves them.
We will now talk about what we can do in order to go from the tense visitation sessions filled
with negative emotions to a well-oiled, appropriate relationship between the child and the biological
parents. Whether we can achieve this or not is essential to the child’s mental health.
How can we calm the parents, eliminate their suspicion, and gain their trust? What can the
professionals caring for the child do to achieve this?
EXERCISE 4.
Collect the following while working in small groups and compare suggestions:
Establishing a partnership
As the parent has defnitely made a big mistake in the past, and those currently caring for their
child play a valuable role in society, the parents easily slip into a submissive role. We should definitely
avoid this!
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U N IT III .  |  COOPER ATION AN D COM M U N IC ATION WITH THE B IOLOGIC AL FAM ILY
EXERCISE 4.
Collect the following while working in small groups and compare suggestions:
– Let’s accept the parents! Talk to them, understand why they got into such a difficult situation,
don’t judge them!
– Show acceptance through metacommunication as well! (gestures)
– Ask for their opinion regarding as many things as possible regarding the child, even if it’s just a
minor issue. Accept that they know their own child better than anyone.
– Provide intimacy during visitation sessions, trust them! Don’t show distrust by unnecessarily
wishing to control the situation.
– Concentrate on positive things (e.g. highlight how much their child missed them, how he was
eagerly awaiting the session, and how often he mentioned them). This will reassure them in their
parental role.
– Highlight the child’s positive traits! (He’s a very smart boy! He dresses up very quickly, and is so
independent!) Don’t hide issues (e.g. he has trouble falling asleep at night)
– Feel free to ask for advice! (e.g. What can I do to make him fall asleep more easily How did he
sleep at home?)
– Let them care for the child at least during the sessions (feeding, getting dressed, using the bath-
room, changing diapers, etc.)
Efforts to establish a partnership can also improve the relationship between the child and the
parents, and aleviate tension in case of properly functioning visitation.
Nonverbal communication
When applying the above, we should always make sure that our metacommunication is in line
with our verbal communication. This is imperative, as nonverbal communication carries greater
importance than spoken words when communicating. Therefore if the two are not in sync, it is the
spoken word that we will not believe! Our metacommunication reveals our true emotions.
Communication has two subcategories: verbal (the use of words) and nonverbal (gestures, artic-
ulation, etc.). Metalanguage is used to a much greater degree (65-70%) than verbal signals.
EXERCISE 5.
Together with the participants, let’s collect the elements of nonverbal communication. Orga-
nize and complement the collected elements, in order to provide an overview of the following:
Facial expression: According to Ekman, seven emotions can be reflected on the face: joy, sur-
prise, fear, sadness, anger, disgust, and interest. The critical lines and points of the face are used to
express these amotions. These are the eyes, and the line of the eyebrows and the mouth.
Eye contact: Eye contact as a communicational channel can also be observed among certain
animals. Through eye contact we can determine whether we are within the perceptional space of
the other creature. It provides an image of what the other is perceiving, what they are noticing, and
therefore provides control over the situation. The direction and content of eye contact always car-
ries a signal. Communication through eye contact is mostly uncoscious.
Vocal communication: These are so-called paralinguistic factors (i.e. reaching beyond language),
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The perspective of the biological parents
for example tone of voice, cadence, intonation, and accent. The voice allows us to determine the
gender, age, character, and nature of the other person, as well as the dialect utilized.
Communicating with movement: The four communication channels involving movement are:
gestures, posture, proxemics, and kinetics.
Gestures are considered the movements of the head, hands, and arms. These bodyparts are
usually in motion during direct communication. Such movements carry a meaning, with some being
conscious, and others unconscious. Gestures have a control function, with the ability to continue,
speed up, interrupt, or explain communication. Gestures convey a number of disturbing signals, for
example the sign of tension. Symbols are often reflected in gestures (e.g. a woman playing with her
ring is having difficulties in her marriage).
Posture: Conveys a stance, opinion, or subjective evaluation. A definitive posture is advisable in
certain social situations and roles. During interactional situations we unwantingly mimic the other
person’s posture.
Proxemics
Zone distances:
1. Intimate zone: 15-45 cm. Only those who stand close emotionally can penetrate this zone.
These are parents, close friends, spouses. There is also an interior zone, called the strictly
intimate zone, which is anything closer than 15 cm, and can only be reached through direct
physical contact.
2. Personal zone: 46 cm – 1.2 m: We stand at this distance from others during cocktail parties,
formal and social gatherings, and meetings.
3. Social zone: 1.2 m – 3.6 m: We stand at this distance from strangers, or anyone we don’t know
well enough.
4. Public zone: 3.6 m – : This is the appropriate distance when talking to a broad audience.
Kinetics
Kinetics encompasses the expressions of the face muscles, along with gestures, postures, and oth-
er fine manifestations. The interpretation of kinetic motions is uncoscious and spontaneous during
everyday life.
EXERCISE 6.
Role play
Every participant should show a gesture without words, and the group should guess what they
are conveying.
– Say the following sentences in different tones, and discuss what they convey:
“Come here!” kindly/as an order
“I am very happy” honestly/stolidly
“What are you doing?” inquisitively/interrogatively
– Try to present situations where verbal and nonverbal communication are out of sync (e.g.”Come
here kids!” with interlocked arms). Ask the participants to give further examples.
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U N IT III .  |  COOPER ATION AN D COM M U N IC ATION WITH THE B IOLOGIC AL FAM ILY The perspective of the biological parents

EXERCISE 7. Nonverbal signs:

– sharp, strong voice
What is it that negatively influences the situation and should definitely be avoided when com- – fast speaking
municating with parents? Form groups to come up with “destructive” sentences! – belittling facial expression
– Don’t evaluate – firmly closed jaw
– Don’t judge Neither aggressive, nor passive communication can be applied in the case of biological parents,
– Don’t criticize as the former spawns aggression, and the latter might inhibit us in representing the child’s interests.
– Don’t educate (even with the best intentions)
– Don’t get into a quarrel I-messages:
Proper communication can aid the establishment of a good relationship An assertive person expresses their wants, needs, opinions, feelings, and convictions in first
Assertive communication: person singular. Gordon calls this way of expression an I-message, thereby highlighting the import-
The effective fulfillment of our interests, where we also consider the interests and viewpoint ant role of composition in case of a conflict...”We can better understand this fact by imagining the
of the other person. A kind of behavior where the individual is capable of protecting themselves following scenario: The husband and wife are spending the evening with some company. The wife
and guarding their self-limits in the given emotional conflict, while respecting the needs of the oth- conspicuously starts being very talkative with an old friend, and even dances with him, which dis-
er party involved. The individual is capable of reacting, guarding self-limits with empathy, without pleases the husband. If the husband tells the wife ”This is revolting! You can’t behave like this!”, it will
expressing anger, while remaining confident. Through assertive (self-validating) communication, the most likely result in a quarrel. However, if he says something like ”I am quite irritated that you are
individual can speak according to their own interests, stand up for their rights and interests without spending so much time with Geza. I feel like I’m being avoided.” (I-message), the wife will be more
anxiety, and fulfill them while considering the interests of others. likely to change her behavior.
The two modes of communication conflicting assertiveness are passiveness and aggressiveness. Examples of I-messages:
During pasive ocmmunication the speaker:– wants to avoid hurting the other person “I am angry” instead of “You annoy me!”
– seeks the approval and consent of others at all cost “I agree” instead of “You are right”
– is inhibitive, secluded “I often feel that...” instead of “Because you always...”
– is a “martyr” The point is to talk from my own perspective and put my own emotions into words instead of
– feels unhappy, damaged, tense for instance criticizing others or the outside world.
Examples of passive communication:
– Excuse me for wasting your valuable time, but...
– It’s just my opinion...
EXERCISE 8.
Nonverbal signs: Write the following sentences on small pieces of paper. Have every participant pull one from
– silent, hesitant voice the stack and discuss whether it is an I-message or a you-message, find its counterpart, and
– little eye contact think of what the possible answers to it might be.
– shoulders slanted forwards, defensively interlocked arms You are shameless! I am frustrated when you behave like this!
All you can do is criticize and mock! I would like your acceptance and appreciation
During aggressive communication the speaker: You keep lying all the time! I am unable to trust you!
– doesn’t consider the goals and interests of others You always have to interrupt me, don’t you? It feels bad when I am interrupted.
– aims to defeat and suppress others You just can’t be trusted! I find it unpleasant that you told this to someone else.
– feels that their violent nature is justified, even at the expense of others You didn’t take out the trash I feel bad for being late because of this.
– reaches their goals at the expense of others just to drive me crazy?
– embarrasses, belittles others
– is rampant, and unpredictably angry Steps of assertive conflict resolution:
1. factually define the problem (what is the real problem) (e.g. in case of visitation: they have been
Examples of aggressive communication: late several times in the last few weeks)
– „Go, or else…” 2. express our feelings regarding the problem (I-messages), instead of judging the other person
– „That’s stupid!” (This offends me as we really were in a hurry to get here on time.)
– „Do you honestly believe that!?” 3. communicate our needs in order to find a solution (It would be good if you could also arrive
on time on the next occasion.)

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Principles of assertive communication: III.3.

Don’t aim to win, but to resolve the issue.
Offer a compromise.
Strive to make it a win-win situation
Promoting a good relationship between the child
Ask, instead of trying to read their mind! and the biological family
Let go of your anger!
Face the conflict with flexibility and empathy!

EXERCISE 9. LEARNING Participants will recognize the importance of visitation and the preparation
OUTCOMES toward that. They need to be perceptive whether intervention is needed in a
Have the participants form small groups and discuss how they would handle the following certain situation. Participants need to understand the emotions of the parents,
situations assertively: they need to be able to handle them and help the parents in advancing their
A) During the visitation session, the parent has been stuffing the child with five pieces of cake. competencies as parents. During visitations it is important to facilitate that the
B) In an excited state, the child runs about, and in doing so knocks over, kicks, and breaks several child and the parents spend quality time together. Participants will be able to
objects. Instead of disciplining the child, the parent further encourages this behavior. set an example for the parents with their behavior regarding care, education,
C) During the session the child is reluctant to go to the parent. The parent takes this quite badly, communication, disciplining, and emotional support.
and tries to force the child to come closer, and tries to give them a kiss by influencing their con-
CONTENT –– Helping the child (and parent) prepare for the visitations, supporting the
science in order to break them.
DESCRIPTION child in recognizing and handling emotions arising after these occasions
–– Responsibilities regarding visitations: content, facilitating quality time
together, reinforcing parental competencies, communication with parents,
perspective of parents
–– Effectively handling possible difficulties (aggressive behavior, irregular
appearance of parents)
TIME FRAME 3 teaching hours
METHODS/ short theoretical lectures, exchange of experience, small-group assignments, role-
ACTIVITIES playing exercises
MATERIALS/ handout, flipchart
MEDIA NEEDED
NUMBER OF 15 participants
PARTICIPANTS

So far we have covered why maintaining contact is of exceptional importance to children. By analyzing
the perspective of the biological parents, we also gained an understanding of why we can expect negative
reactions and difficulties. Finally, we learned to cope with these difficulties with the help of acceptance,
assertive communication, and striving to form a partnership.
In this section we will elaborate the process of maintaining contact, from the very beginning up until
the digestion of emotions arising after the visitation session. The aim is to discover how we can aid chil-
dren and their parents in the formation and maintenance of a substantial, quality relationship.
Technical conditions of visitation
Visitation can take place in different locations, each having their advantages and drawbacks.

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U N IT III .  |  COOPER ATION AN D COM M U N IC ATION WITH THE B IOLOGIC AL FAM ILY Promoting a good relationship between the child and the biological family

EXERCISE
Ask the participants to form small groups, collect some of the possible locations of visitation based on
their own experience, and define their advantages and disadvantages.
A) Visitation at the child’s care location
B) Visitation at the institution, in a “common facility”
C) Visitation at the home of the parent
Visitation at the child’s care location:
Advantages:
– the parent can get a glimpse of the child’s life, environment, and how he is cared for
– the child’s toys, favorite objects are available, he can show his newest possessions, they can play
together, livening up the relationship
–– – the parent can rest assured that their child is properly cared for
–– – the parent remains an active part of the child’s life
Disadvantages:
– as the parent gains lots of information about the child’s life and circumstances, these can be a source
of conflict (e.g. if the child got into a fight with another child just before the parent’s arrival, and they insist
on dispensing justice)
– respecting boundaries can be an issue in case of foster families (e.g. the parent refuses to leave on
time, they invite them for lunch, then dinner, but their presence becomes a burden and generates tension,
which will snap sooner or later)
– lack of professional help in case of disagreement or conflict
As this is an emotionally challenging situation for children, it is not advised to let them meet with the
parents without preparation. This is especially important during the beginnings, when we need to familiarize
the child with the process of visitation, and make them accept the fact that after the session the parent will
leave, and he will stay at the care location (understanding this can be difficult for smaller children).
Executing the visitation session
The sensitive balance of the “appropriate degree” of participation:
To what extent should we be present and interfere during the session?
EXERCISE
Ask the participants to imagine how they would feel as a parent if
A) Apart from greeting them, the people caring for their child do not say a single word to them?
B) Someone would sit there the whole time, commenting on every single sentence, and constantly
interfering?
– Children’s homes often leave the parent and the child alone by themselves, keeping the parent from
finding out information about their child. They might feel that they are not important to the institution.
– Foster parents often fall into the opposite extremity, and tend to overly control the visitation,
which spawns revulsion in the parent, since it shows a complete lack of trust. It is most likely that the
foster parents do this in order to protect the child, and keep them from hearing sentences that might
agitate or confuse them. However, these sentences will be heard anyway, as they are important. Ex-
cessive control and presence unnecessarily damages the relationship between the parents and foster
parents.

Visitation at the institution

Advantages:
–– a guarded and controlled environment, where professional help is readily available
Disadvantages:
–– an artificial environment, often completely lacking any sense of intimacy
–– the parent and the child feel intimidated in the unknown ”official” environment
–– parents often lack the skills to treat their children properly and play with them in such situations
–– the relationship becomes empty, and overly formal
EXERCISE
Ask the participants to form small groups and collect possible practical applications that can be
used during visitation sessions.
Involving the parents in the daily life of the child
ƒƒ Celebrating special occasions with the participation of the parent, giving them a certain role, for
instance in preparation, execution, being part of the audience (e.g. if the children have prepared
some sort of performance), or being a team member (e.g. during sport competitions)

Visitation at the home of the parent: Educators and foster parents regularly consult with the biological parents
Advantages: ƒƒ Initiating the formation of a partnership founded upon trust
– maintains a strong, close relationship ƒƒ Immediately getting in touch after the child’s arrival in order to discuss the principles (aims,
– the parent has the opportunity to practice their parental role in its entirety boundaries) of cooperation (not referring to regulations)
– it is this form of visitation that results in the lowest degree of emotional detachment from the parent ƒƒ Showing an empathetic attitude, accepting the parents’ difficulties (e.g. if they have trouble
Disadvantages: expressing themselves, often excuse themselves, or question the foster parents’ expertise)
– It is often difficult for all parties to cope with ”dual education”. The accepted norms and behavior at ƒƒ Focusing on strengths, finding reinforceable behaviors (not amplifying shortcomings, reproach)
home differ from those at the care location, which can confuse the child. ƒƒ Involving the parent in the problem solving process in case of any trouble with the child, as the issues
and interests are common, making cooperation possible (not through the collision of values, or
Preparing for visitation blaming each other)
Regardless of the location of visitation, it is very important to emotionally prepare the child as ƒƒ Helping in the conscious planning of visitation (e.g. recommending activities that are interesting to
well as the parent for the visitation session. the child, providing educational advice)

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ƒƒ Openness towards the parent’s issues and feelings about the child (don’t say that this should be
someone else’s job)
Stressing the importance of the parents
ƒƒ Discussions about important family events (including trauma, if needed by the child), people,
habits, locations, personal belongings, and their collection and visualization (e.g. creating a family
tree, photo album, life path map)
ƒƒ Keeping track of the special dates of family members, greeting them, making presents
ƒƒ Inquiring about the time and quality of visitation (not interrogation, judgment), highlighting
affirmative movements
ƒƒ Accepting the extreme and ambivalent feelings towards the parent (idealized parent image,
hostile anger, craving to be reunited)
ƒƒ It is important to stress that we are communicating about the parents even when we are not
explicitly talking about them with the child.
ƒƒ The child considers it a message related to their own parents if we
ƒƒ talk with others about the parents,
ƒƒ talk about the parents of other children,
ƒƒ talk about anyone who resembles the parents (e.g. roma, alcoholic, homeless, poor, convicted, etc.)
Our emotional approach is mainly communicated through nonverbal channels, without conscious
control in most cases. Using our facial expression, gestures, intonation, etc. we constantly convey signals
on what we think about the other person. This means that before learning the different methods and
communication techniques, we must develop our personal approach towards the parents, and those
living in the broader environment of the child.
Playful activities with the children
EXERCISE
Marika has been living with foster parents for seven years, where she feels comfortable, and has in-
tegrated successfullly. Her mother is homeless, with little chance of finding a way out of her issues, and is
therefore unable to look after her. She visits her every week, when they meet in the visitation facility of
the child support authority. The mother always brings a little present for her daughter, usually chocolate
or other sweets. The sessions are usually very silent. The mother doesn’t ask many questions, and the
little girl has become more reserved and quiet in the past few weeks.
Ask the participants to form three groups and discuss what could be the cause of this silence.
A) What could the little girl feel in this situation? Why is she being quiet?
B) What could the mother feel? Why is she being quiet?
C) What could the foster parent feel?
Jointly discuss how the foster parent could help, and what the outcome would be if nobody inter-
vened.
It is important for the foster parents and educators to accept the fact that although visitation sessions
are emotionally challenging for children, they contribute to their healthy personality development in the
long run. It is therefore the job of qualified professionals to consider the long term effects in order to aid
children and their parents through hardships in the present.
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Promoting a good relationship between the child and the biological family
EXERCISE
Ask the participants to think about how they can help the child to process the events occuring during
visitation sessions after they have ended.
E.g. conversation (only if initiated by the child)
Tension relieving games involving movement (playing tag, wrestling, etc.)
Effective management of inhibiting circumstances (hostile parental behavior, irregular appearance of
the parent)
SMALL GROUP EXERCISE.
Divide the participants into three groups and ask them to elaborate the below three situations. Re-
mind them to consider the previously learned conflict resolution techniques, as well as the material cov-
ered in this chapter.
A) parents are hostile towards the educators/foster parents during visitation
B) the parents visit on an irregular basis, often not showing up without any prior notice, while the child
was expecting to meet them
C) the child’s parents never visit, while most of the other children in the group or foster family are
visited regularly
What could the child feel?
How would you help them cope with this situation?
Children who are never visited by anyone are in the most difficult situation. This is where we should
mention so-called “five-minute visits”. The lack of sought-after visits, as well as having only short visits
deepens the feeling of uncertainty, vulnerability, and abandonment within the child. This spawns increased
tension and anxiety, which makes it hard for them to be part of a group or foster family, as it is mainly
manifested through behavior.
In such cases it is our job to reach out to the parents and uncover the reasons behind their absence
from visitation, as well as to motivate and involve them by strengthening their competencies. The with-
drawal of the parent is often caused by the sense that they have failed in their parental role because
their social circumstances inhibit them from being able to raise their child. This generates tension within
them (during every single visit), as the foster family/institution is able to provide their child better living
conditions and opportunities (which they are unable to provide). It is therefore important to stress that
although the institution/foster family can provide the necessary material requirements for proper care,
they are unable to substitute the role of the biological parent. We must draw their attention to the op-
portunities in this situation that are available exclusively to them as parents.
In case of a lack of parental visitation, we should cooperate with the child support authority and
members of the family.
EXERCISE
In the remaining time, ask the participants to share their most definitive experiences in relation to the
subject. Analyze and discuss the experiences in light of what they have learned so far with the help of the
trainer.
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 UNIT IV.
Trauma and
crisis in the life
of children in
foster care

ƒƒ INTRODUCTION TO TRAUMAPEDAGOGY
ƒƒ CREATING A SAVER ENVIRONMENT
ƒƒ WAYS OF RELIEVING TRAUMATICAL MEMORIES
ƒƒ FRAME CONDITIONS FOR AN OUTER SAVER
PLACE
ƒƒ TRAUMPEDAGOGIC NEGOTIATION
ƒƒ SKILL-TRAINING FOR STRESS TOLERANCE
ƒƒ POSTTRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER
ƒƒ IMPACT OF TRAUMATICAL EXPERIENCES

Source: pixab ay.com

U N IT IV.  |  TR AU MA AN D CRI S I S IN THE LIFE OF CHILDREN IN FOSTER C ARE Introduction to traumapedagogy

LEARNING Make a case; hypothesis/thesis IV.1.

OUTCOMES Minimizing symptoms through creating an outer saver environment
Traumpedagogic negotiation Introduction trauma-pedagogy
Using of new working material and methods
to adopt an attitude of traumapedagogic
Better handling of strain factors
Traumaspecific anamnesis and diagnostic
LEARNING Traumpedagogic negotiation
COMPETENCIES Implementation of fundamental methods of traumapedagy. OUTCOMES Adopting the attitude of traumapedagogy
TARGETED Understanding destructive behavior of kids and youngsters.
CONTENT –– Introduction to traumpedagogy
Transfer theoretical knowledge to everyday life.
DESCRIPTION –– Ways of reliving traumatical memories
Producing frame conditions to release children by developing new alternative
action strategies and life concepts. TIME FRAME 4 teaching hours
Recognizing trauma factors. ACTIVITIES Theoretical basic information/knowledge and methods in the foreground:
Understanding of destructive behavior of kids and young people. PROPOSED practical using of methods in everyday life; role play.
Transfering theoretical knowledge to everyday life. RESOURCES Course Book, handout, flip chart, treatment plans.
Producing frame conditions to release children by developing new alternative action NEEDED
strategies and life concepts.
NUMBER OF 15 participants
TIME FRAME 12teaching hours PARTICIPANTS
METHODS/ Theoretical basic information/knowledge and methods in the foreground: practical using
ACTIVITIES of methods in everyday life; role play, physical exercises. Especially in the area of residential child and youth welfare, there are persons with behaviour patterns,
PROPOSED such as provocations, angry outbursts, risky or self-destructive acts, violence towards others, themselves
MATERIALS/ Course Book, handout. and objects, dropout from school, truancy, etc.
MEDIA NEEDED When we regard the traumatised young people and children as injured people rather than perpetra-
tors and troublemakers, educators should be empathic and try to understand them. This workshop deals
TARGET GROUP Educators/carers/foster parents.
with various aspects of attitudes and tries to offer the theoretical background.

Many adolescents with traumatic life experiences live in youth welfare institutions and foster care.
Out-of-home care in traditional services often fail with particularly traumatised children and adolescents;
however, the continuity of relationship is decisive for a further prognosis. With regard to the employees,
it is particularly important to ensure job satisfaction and an awareness of the workforce for their own
emotional responses to protect them against traumatic re-enactments. Children and adolescents with
complex traumas have specific pedagogical needs; chronically traumatised children, however, often suffer
from specific symptoms because they were not able to learn basic skills in their biological families. These
skills should be promoted in milieu-therapeutic services. Working with heavily traumatised children is
very stressful, and both staff as well as therapists need particularly intensive support. Trauma-peda-
gogical concepts strengthen the self-efficacy of group employees and facilitate common case definition.
Trauma-pedagogical elements help all children who are in out-of-home care. It’s about trauma-sensitive
attitudes rather than new technologies.
Trauma defined
Trauma is not a fixed unit which is always the same; therefore, we prefer a concept of trauma that
includes process orientation and dynamics.
ƒƒ It is caused by situations or events of extreme or prolonged and usually exceptional stress
ƒƒ that exceed the person’s coping strategies and, therefore,
ƒƒ result in ongoing and profound changes of the experience of oneself and the world
ƒƒ and cause permanent changes in thinking, feeling and acting.
Posttraumatic stress disorders, for example, often go hand-in-hand with depression, addiction, bor-
derline-type impulsive personality disorders, other anxiety disorders, and chronic pain. Careful and com-
petent diagnostics is important for both educational as well as therapeutic work.
Trauma-specific symptoms:
ICD 10 and DSM mainly mention the following symptoms:
ƒƒ Loss of control, such as repeated reliving the trauma in intrusive memories and flashbacks; can
lead to repeated behaviour as if the trauma was happening ‘right now’.

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ƒƒ Avoiding thoughts, feelings, activities, and situations that might evoke memories of the trauma.
ƒƒ State of vegetative hyperarousal with increased alertness and enhanced startle reactions
(hypervigilance).
ƒƒ Suicidal thoughts.
ƒƒ Self-injury, self-destructive behaviour.
ƒƒ Apathy, indifference to other people.
ƒƒ Aggression/withdrawal, conduct disorder.
ƒƒ Excessive thirst for affection and dependent behaviour.
ƒƒ Increased bonding behaviour.
Typical dynamics
Some pathologies, such as anxiety or intrusion, are immediate consequences of trauma. In order to
cope better, people develop additional trauma compensation strategies such as avoiding something that
has been experienced as being dangerous or strong sensation seeking to prevent intrusion (switching on
the TV, music or bright light when trying to sleep). Rather than defending themselves, children tend to
freeze in stress situations, which will often result in bullying. Without these trauma-specific considerations
indirect or direct consequences of trauma might not be recognized as such but wrongly attributed to the
character of a boy or girl.
Changes in physiology or neurology
From an evolutionary perspective, the body reactions to stress are very old. What are trauma-related
physical reactions?
Fight-flight system: Very quickly, it puts the body into readiness to act. We are awake, alert, tense, and
most ready to respond, ready to fight and flee. If a situation cannot be resolved by fighting the binding
system comes into action. We take a humble attitude, tremble or demonstrate our helplessness. If we
then receive help the bonding experience is strengthened.
If neither fight nor flight or binding appeal work, we freeze.
It is mainly the brain stem, the limbic system and the prefrontal cortex that are involved in the fight or
flight symptoms. Evolutionary, the brainstem is the oldest part of the brain; we share it with most animals.
It controls the vital body systems such as breathing, blood circulation, heart rate, and blood pressure. The
limbic system is located in the midbrain and contains the hippocampus and the amygdala. It is a vital factor
in controlling the autonomic nervous system. This is where a lot of information from various brain and
body regions come together and influence each other.
The amygdala links events with emotions. By overstimulation the trigger threshold for a stimulus that
is classified as dangerous falls; this often leads to a generalisation of several smaller stimuli.
In the fight-flight response the body is largely on autopilot; the consciousness has only possibilities to
intervene in automatic reactions. Related experience: I can help myself.
The binding system sets in when neither fighting nor fleeing is possible: Oxytocin plays an important
part in this process. If it is secreted the fight-flight response is inhibited. Also, the parasympathetic nervous
system is activated. Related experience: I am being helped.
The freezing system is activated if the person cannot eliminate danger through fight/flight or binding.
The limbic system plays an important role in such a case; a strong activation of the parasympathetic ner-
vous system is causing a shutdown. All this happens arbitrarily, through higher-level thought processes.
104
Introduction to traumapedagogy
Related experience: I am extradited.
With traumatised people, the Broca’s region is less active. There may be a connection here with the
difficulty to verbalise trauma-specific content. In situations of complex trauma one of the three systems
might remain permanently activated. Or components from all three systems may alternate. The brain
and, thus, all the bodily reactions are then in constant alert.
If, therefore, boys and girls show a significantly higher degree of arousal and it takes them longer to
calm down they cannot be expected to control themselves. Clearing and conversations that are not
directly linked with de-escalation are meaningful only after sufficient reassurance. Following a traumatic
situation, the body shows repeated or constant vegetative hyperarousal and/or freeze reactions.
Values and attitudes in trauma pedagogy
„Above all, pedagogy is a question of attitudes rather than methodology.”
Appreciation starts off with recognising the things that are. In addition, it is important to focus on
what may be rather than on what you think there should be.
Many traumatised children and young people have lost their self-esteem.
When working with this target group, it might help to bear in mind that at any moment every person
shows the best possible behaviour. If behavioural changes are desired we need to change internal and
external conditions in such a way that, in the future, the person will have more options to choose from
and more useful decision-making criteria.
Authority can be seen as a position that is awarded to us by the boys and girls; it causes them to use
the employees as their role models in their thinking and acting. It is important to be aware of your own
strength and power and to use them for your clients’ benefit. That will give children and young people
the opportunity to grow into their own strengths.
However, recognising the positive intention does not mean to sugar-coat something.
Example – working with parents: Again and again, a mother leaves her toddler on her own during the
night because she goes out with her girlfriends. The positive intention is to do something good for herself
and to feel joy. If we take this as a seriously positive intention and support the mother we, together with
her, can develop ways of how to reconcile her desire for joy with her responsibility for her child.
The focus on resources is well established, yet little lived. For every behavioural pattern that means
to ask for the resources a person should have in order to be able to demonstrate a certain behaviour.
Three questions: What can you do well? What do you like about yourself? What are you proud of?
EXERCISE
Focus on resources and positive intention
ƒƒ Think of some particularly difficult children or young people.
ƒƒ Choose one that was especially difficult.
ƒƒ Think of a specific behaviour pattern of this child or young person.
ƒƒ After you have decided on a certain behaviour pattern ask yourself the following questions and
take your time to find the answers:
ƒƒ What resources must the child/young person have to behave in exactly this way?
ƒƒ What might the positive intention beyond this behaviour pattern be?
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Security and safety
Security is a necessary condition for acting in the trauma-pedagogical field. Children and young people
can feel safe when they
ƒƒ are in an external safe place in which they are not threatened by any dangers;
ƒƒ are with people who protect them and ward off dangers;
ƒƒ find security in themselves, trust themselves and are quite sure to be able to master all the
challenges and hazardous situations;
ƒƒ hide all external dangers and oppressive internal images and are able to go to a safe internal place.
External safe place
Traumatised children and young people often experience the world as a dangerous place. The exter-
nal safe place is a counter model in order to experience safety and security and a life without dangers.
This requires a framework in which their needs can be met. This includes:
ƒƒ a framework in which their physical, psychological and social basic needs are well met;
ƒƒ providing as many resilience factors as possible and reducing risk factors;
ƒƒ people by whom they feel being loved and who provide security and comfort;
ƒƒ living conditions that provide comfort and joy of life;
ƒƒ external and internal transparency, controllability and predictability, which, among other things,
requires flexible-stable structures and opportunities for participation;
ƒƒ a pedagogical environment that is protective, supplying, energizing, and stimulating so that
confidence in yourself and your own abilities and a feeling of your own value can be relearned.
Whether a location provides external security depends on the employees’ training and readiness but
also on the premises and the equipment. They should express and support the intention of the setting.
This includes:
ƒƒ integrity of buildings, furniture and equipment and a cosy interior design;
ƒƒ no delay when broken furniture needs to be repaired or replaced;
ƒƒ exterior doors with locking and ringing possibilities to prevent unwanted persons from entering;
ƒƒ separate rooms for children and young people that can be experienced as a safe environment
with the possibility to lock them from the inside (only educators have access from the outside);
ƒƒ possibilities to move around in the house and in the surrounding area (garden);
ƒƒ careful consideration about what potentially dangerous objects are accessible under what kind of
circumstances.
Clear structures and processes support the provision of security. A realistic and lived general con-
cept with embedded specific offers/services is very important. Conditions for admission and discharge,
attending school, educational understanding, crisis intervention, and therapeutic aids must be established.
Routines and rituals provide security about how daily and weekly processes and everyday and special
situations are handled; how special events are appreciated and what festivities are celebrated in what
way. For the best possible participation, it is essential to clarify what structures are firmly defined, what
is negotiable, where boys and girls can decide for themselves, and whether rules are ‘should-, must– or
can-rules’.
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Introduction to traumapedagogy
Personal safe place
By continually experiencing safe, stable, reliable, and loving relationships affiliation can be developed
and positively experienced; old relationship issues can be overcome and replaced by new ones.
For relationship building, this means:
ƒƒ The relations are secure, long-term, reliable, appreciative, and sympathetic. Frequent change of
staff and a change of the care place need to be avoided.
ƒƒ Proximity is offered but not claimed; relationship offers are transparent and supportive and
respect the personal boundaries of the children and young people.
ƒƒ Relationship offers are geared to the needs of the children/young people and consider the
employees.
ƒƒ It should be noted that adults/educators are always in a position of power. In order for them
to have a healing effect it is necessary that they are aware of their own power with regard to
themselves and their roles; they need to make it transparent and use it for the benefit of all those
involved in the process.
ƒƒ The employees are confident in handling dynamics such as transference-countertransference,
personal entanglements, their clients’ ambivalences, relationship traps, and manipulations; they
receive supervsion/coaching.
ƒƒ Any kind of violence in the form of assaults, threats, salacious remarks, depreciation, humiliation,
or exclusion is not tolerated.
Children/young people in a state of strong regression, partly, experience their soft toys as personal
safe places; live animals can also take this place. Accordingly, these relationships should be appreciated.
Professional proximity is a fundamental attitude and a tool to establish oneself as a personal safe place.
Educators need to be present as an entity.
Inner safe place
Many traumatised people experience flashbacks and intrusions. Creating a safe inner place can help to
protect themselves. With regard to dynamics, it makes no difference whether this place is interpreted as
a spiritual or an inner mental reality.
Key terms: Early childhood trauma, bonding, perpetrator, symptoms
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 U N IT IV.  |  TR AU MA AN D CRI S I S IN THE LIFE OF CHILDREN IN FOSTER C ARE Creating a saver environment

IV. 2.  The children and teenagers learn to listen to other people’s physical cues (e. g. being pulled by the
hand). In addition, they learn to trust the other person, and they, playfully, get in physical contact with
Creating a saver environment another person.

ƒƒ Sculptures (Participants run/dance to the music across the room. When the music is stopped all
remain in the position they have just had – they ‘fossilise’ and become sculptures.)
 This exercise also aims at training physical awareness. In addition, it serves as a body control exercise.
LEARNING Minimizing symptoms through creating an outer saver environment
OUTCOMES Traumpedagogic negotiation ƒƒ Near – distant (Facing each other, the children and young people stand in two rows; the
Better handling of strain factors pairs stand about three to four metres apart and maintain eye contact. On command, all
children and young people in the one row start to move slowly towards the other row. The
CONTENT –– Frame conditions for an outer saver place
respective opposite person is advised to say ‘STOP’ as soon as he/she realises that it would be
DESCRIPTION –– Traumpedagogic negotiation
uncomfortable for him/her to have the other person coming even closer. Then all participants can
–– Skill-training for stress tolerance
look around and have a look at the others as well. Then the participants are asked to move one
TIME FRAME 4 teaching hours step further; the standing participants are asked to particularly pay attention to how it feels when
METHODS/ACTIVITIES Theoretical basic information/knowledge and methods in the foreground: someone crosses your own limit. Then the pairs change roles.)
PROPOSED practical using of methods in everyday life; role play, physical exercises.  This exercise supports children and young people in understanding that each person needs
PowerPoint presentation and discussion with exercises. some space around them; others should not enter this space should without permission. With
RESOURCES NEEDED Course Book, handout, flip chart, yoga materials, handbook, practical the help of this exercise, the children and young people can develop a sense of how close you
exercises (cloths, chairs, music) can come to another person without harassing him/her.

NUMBER OF 15 participants
ƒƒ Weather massage (In a circle, the participants sit on the floor and everyone has a back sitting
PARTICIPANTS
in front of him/her. The group leader speaks: It’s a rainy day today. Single raindrops are falling from
the sky. Then the rain is getting stronger ...! Each weather condition is transferred into a specific
Description of the specific objectives:
movement on the back of the other person.)
1. Develop a trauma-pedagogical understanding, communication and feedback processes, staff devel-
opment, equipment in the institutions Single raindrops – one finger at a time is pressing gently onto the back
2. Mindfulness Exercises Rain getting stronger – drumming with all fingers
Downpour – clapping onto the back with your palms
Materials/resources needed: Lightning – tracing with fingers
Thunder – drumming with fists
Description of the activity: Hail – gently wiping
PAGE
XX See PowerPoint in the Handouts section (Trauma-pedagogical standards in residential child and youth Sun is rising – drawing circle with rays
services) Sun is drying – stroking the back
Sun is warming – placing hands on the back
Body exercises/ mindfulness
ƒƒ Tensing/relaxing (Everybody sits down on a chair and tense their muscles. Then they loosen their Key terms: Tension, proximity, distance
muscles and relax. The exercise can also be done while lying down.)
 Inspired by Jacobson’s progressive muscle relaxation, this exercise aims at giving children and young
people a sense of how tense they might often be in everyday life and of how relaxing it is to simply
relax. Furthermore, it aims at training physical awareness.
ƒƒ Guiding the blind (The children and young people form groups of two; one person per pair
is blindfolded. The sighted person guides the other person across the room. Speaking is not
allowed. Afterwards, the people change roles.)

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U N IT IV.  |  TR AU MA AN D CRI S I S IN THE LIFE OF CHILDREN IN FOSTER C ARE Ways of relieving traumatical memories

IV. 3. better you will manage to develop a common model of understanding. This process also involves working out,
fundamentally and again and again, whether the child/young person requests something from you and what
Ways of relieving traumatical memories that might be.

Stabilisation
In order to successfully move from the experience of being a victim to independently acting it is neces-
sary for them to get back on their feet and to learn to control their body reactions, feelings and behaviour
LEARNING Make a case; hypothesis/thesis patterns. That includes about all the contents offered in trainings for self-experience, self-efficacy, social skills,
OUTCOMES Traumpedagogy negotiation problem solving skills, conflict management, self-care, and creativity. They need to be promoted in both ev-
Using of new working material and methods eryday life as well as through specific pedagogical interventions. Goals should be developed with the children
Trauma-specific anamnesis and diagnostic and young people that are really important to them.
Recognizing trauma factors
Transfer theoretical knowledge to everyday life Physical stabilisation
Producing frame conditions to release children by developing new alternative Especially with traumatised children and young people who have experienced violations of boundaries
action strategies and life concepts and physical abuse, working on physicality and contact is a key issue. Many of them experience their bodies
CONTENT –– Posttraumatic stress disorder primarily as a source of suffering; others fear any kind of physical proximity. Some of them consciously neglect
DESCRIPTION –– Impact of traumatical experiences or deface their bodies.
TIME FRAME 4 teaching hours Since physicality affects so many personal, educational, therapeutic, and legal aspects it is necessary to
agree on a common pathway in the team/institution. Staff members need to be sensitised and to profes-
METHODS/ Theoretical basic information/knowledge and methods in the foreground:
sionally deal with values and ethics. Since the perception of physical boundaries is often shifted due to the
ACTIVITIES practical using of methods in everyday life; role play, physical exercises.
traumatic experience it is necessary to assess appropriate steps in each individual case. Some possibilities of
PROPOSED
integrating physicality in everyday life: shaking hands, giving a high five, barefoot path, dance choreographies,
RESOURCES Course Book, handout, social network card, genogram. artistry, cooking and baking, splashing about in the sand, and activity trails.
NEEDED
NUMBER OF 15 participants Stabilisation and control of emotions
PARTICIPANTS For their emotional stability, children and young people need to be supported in perceiving, naming,
allowing, and enduring emotions. It might help to organise everyday life in a way that leaves room for
Many trauma disorders help to survive in dangerous situations. Increased alertness, for example, lets you feelings and the expression of feelings. This requires facilities that allow for both retreat as well as com-
detect threats faster, an increased adrenaline level allows for quicker responses etc. Traumatised girls and munity experience and physically acting out of feelings. Anger and anxiety are a part of life and must not
boys can only abandon these behaviour patterns when they experience themselves as permanently secure. be suppressed for the sake of a peaceful group. It must be possible to cry in front of others, to scream
Until then, a way of dealing with these behaviour patterns needs to be found. Their individual experiences into your pillow or to channel your feelings through loud music or arts. Focussing on the body awareness
should be seriously considered and experience and behaviour should be regarded as expressions of human in connection with feelings can be a good starting point in relaxed exercises if you want to learn how to
life-saving skills; their meaningfulness within the traumas-stamped reality needs to be appreciated. perceive and distinguish feelings. That works on your own and in groups. First, however, the children/
Depending on how much the daily life is marked by the traumatic experience, it will be important to act young people should learn how to safely anchor themselves in the here and now in order to be able to
in a trauma-pedagogic way or to choose other focuses. get back there.
Core subjects of trauma-pedagogic acting emerge and are always intertwined.
Both interventions in which you provide security and let yourself being experienced as a safe personal
place as well as the children experiencing a secured basic care are important for building the relationship.
EXERCISE
ƒƒ Remember a situation when you were angry.
Since all children/young people have ties with their parents it is important to appreciate those relationships
ƒƒ Where in your body can you feel the anger most clearly?
and to create them in a positive way.
ƒƒ How does it feel (rather warm or cool; hard/soft; heavy/light; narrow/wide; movable/stable; moving
It needs to be noted that, so far, traumatised children/young people have been discharged or felt to be
around in your body/at one point)?
intolerable when their relationship dynamics overburdened the staff’s capacities.
ƒƒ Now move away from the memory and bring your attention back.
In this kind of work, the idea is to develop a common understanding. Through observation, factual knowl-
edge and conversation we need to find out how a child/young person is experiencing herself/himself and her/ This is followed by a detailed discussion. Then, the same is done with a positive feeling. The last round
his world. The better you know their realities the better you will be able to understand them yourself and the should always be a positive feeling.

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U N IT IV.  |  TR AU MA AN D CRI S I S IN THE LIFE OF CHILDREN IN FOSTER C ARE
Preventing loss of control/ averting impending loss of control
There are special trauma-specific methods of violence prevention. Lang (2013) recommends learning
to clearly perceive the impetus to fight (including everything that indicates arousal, tension, loud speech),
flight (including sitting directly by the door or at the edge of a chair, agitation) and freezing (stiffness and ri-
gidity in posture, movement, view; shallow breathing). The next step is for the educators to address what
they are perceiving and to ask about what is causing the fear and how this can be changed. In addition,
special offers should be made to deflect impulses: focussing on fight, that would be anything that gives vent
to arousal or simulates battle (screaming, running out of the house etc.) and ways to musically express
feelings; focussing on escape, that would be creating possibilities for retreat; for freezing, for shaking it off.
Also, the group’s knowledge should always be used.
Loss of control does not usually happen within seconds; it can be noticed ahead of time.
Whatever interrupts the path between the trigger and the loss of control, and is ethically justifiable,
can be used as a separator. You need to have the heart and be creative and do crazy things in such cases.
Examples that facilitate finding separators:
ƒƒ Stimuli that ask for attention: loud noises, strong smells, loud utterance of the name, lying down on
a subwoofer, biting a hot chili pepper...
ƒƒ Stimuli that bind the attention: counting down from 254 in steps of 17, reciting a poem/the lyrics of
a song, listing European capitals, clapping games...
ƒƒ Activities that keep you in the here and now: counting all green objects in the room, listing three
things each that you can hear, see, smell, taste, and feel right now; putting a rubber band around
your wrist and snapping it.
ƒƒ Emergency case with various techniques, treasure chests and lucky boxes as a supplement.
Safeguarding
It is necessary to ensure the employees’ safety and that of the children and young people in situations
of loss of control. This includes the interior design, staff training and contingency plans. The employees’
competences must include technical expertise, alternative ways of action and techniques for self-control;
that way they will be able to provide professional support rather than reacting out of anger, fear and
shock.
Implications for treatment
In the treatment of traumatised children and young people, one is often facing a painful dilemma in
deciding whether to leave them in the care of individuals or institutions that are the source of their inju-
ries and threats; or whether to confront them with loss and pain of separation by removing the children
from their familiar environment and from the people to whom they are closely bonded and who would
likely cause substantial further damage.
Creating safety and competence
Children with complex traumas need to be encouraged in drawing their attention to activities that (1)
do not recall trauma-related triggers and (2) provide them with a sense of pleasure and mastery. Safety,
predictability and ‘fun’ are essential for the developing the ability to observe what is going on, to embed
it into a larger context and to initiate physiological and motor-based self-regulation. First of all, these
children need to be supported in reacting differently than using their habitual fight/curse/solidification
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Ways of relieving traumatical memories
reactions. Only if the children develop the ability to focus on fun activities without disorganising they will
have the chance to develop the ability to play with other children, to participate in simple group activities
and to deal with complex tasks.
Dealing with traumatic re-enactment
Following multiple traumas, traumas can be found in many areas of the child’s behavioural repertoire.
This manifests itself in various ways: for example, in anxious, aggressive and sexual acting out, in avoidance
and in uncontrolled reactions. As long as this tendency, the repetition of the trauma, is not recognised
the response of the environment will likely be a repetition of the original traumatic, abusive but familiar
relationships. Since these children are prone to see all new things, including rules and other protective
interventions, as a form of punishment they tend to perceive their teachers and therapists, who try to
create safety, as perpetrators.
Observing the body: Integration and control
Dominating something is, primarily, a physical experience: the feeling to pay attention to something,
to be relaxed and able to undertake focused efforts to achieve targets set by yourself. These children
experience trauma-related over-excitation and numbness on a very deep somatic level. Their over-ex-
citation becomes obvious in their inability to rest and in their high degree of irritability. Children with
‘frozen’ reaction patterns must be supported in re-raising their curiosity and exploring their environment.
They avoid getting involved in activities, since each task might turn into an unexpected traumatic trigger.
Neutral ‘fun’ tasks and physical games can provide them with the knowledge because it feels good to be
relaxed and to have a sense of physical mastery. With frightened children, the therapeutic work focusses
on helping them in finding out that they repeat their past experiences and in finding coping strategies
that would enable new connections between their experiences, emotions and physical reactions. Un-
fortunately, medication far too often take the function to help children in their search for the necessary
competences in dealing with and mastering their unpleasant physical sensations. In order to be able to
‘process’ their traumatic experiences, these children must, first and foremost, have a safe place to be able
to ‘look into’ their traumas without repeating them and letting them come true again.
EXERCISE
The following questions can be helpful for the daily work:
ƒƒ What makes a place a safe place for a person?
ƒƒ When I was a child/teenager/adult, when did I feel fear and what did I need to feel safe?
ƒƒ How can I support the girls and boys in presenting to me, in an understandable way, what frightens
them or gives them security?
ƒƒ How can I actually use the findings in my work?
Key terms: Safety, handling, treatment
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HANDOUTS to UNIT IV.

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 UNIT V.
Learning
difficulties
and learning
motivation

ƒƒ LEARNING DIFFICULTIES
ƒƒ HELPING A CHILD WITH LEARNING
DIFFICULTIES
ƒƒ LEARNING MOTIVATION

Source: pixab ay.com

U N IT V. LE ARN ING DIFFICU LTIES AN D LE ARN ING MOTIVATION

LEARNING Participants will understand what learning difficulties are, and familiarize with the Presentation of the unit:
OUTCOMES most common types of learning difficulties or disabilities: dyslexia, dysgraphia,
and dyscalculia, ADD. The learning-unit is divided into three parts: In the first part we will learn about the most com-
mon types of learning disabilities, in the second part our preoccupation will be to present some
Participants will be able to recognize the signs and symptoms of learning accessible ways to help kids with learning difficulties and disabilities and in the third section we will
difficulties. deal with the topic of learning motivation. Time allocated for the unit: six hours, 2 hours for each
section.
Participants will develop skills to help the kids who are struggling with
learning difficulties.
Learning outcomes: Participants will familiarize with the most common types of learning difficul-
Participants will be able to recognize the reasons behind the lack of ties or disabilities: dyslexia, dysgraphia, dyscalculia, ADD, will be able to recognize the symptoms of
learning motivation in children. these disorders. Participants will be able to help in specific areas that function poorly in the learning
process, will be able to plan and implement life-related learning sessions for the child. Participants
Participants will understand how extrinsic and intrinsic motivation works and the
will understand and identify specific components of motivation, will be able to recognize the rea-
connection between age and the type of motivation that works better.
sons behind the lack of learning motivation in children. Participants will understand how extrinsic
Participants will be able to plan and use systematically both types of motivation and intrinsic motivation works, will be able to make intervention plans to re-motivate children to
with the kids. learn, adapting techniques to the age and needs of the children.
COMPETENCIES mediating information, learning techniques, integrating learning contents with real– life
Competencies targeted: teaching skills, mediating information, integrating learning contents with
TARGETED teaching, planning, motivational skills, self-reflection, increasing the feeling of self-
real– life teaching, planning, motivational skills, self-reflection, increasing the feeling of self-compe-
competence, developing an encouraging attitude, recognizing the personal limits in
tence, handling negative believes and emotions,developing an encouraging attitude, cooperation
helping with learning disorders, cooperation with specialist
with educational therapists.
TIME FRAME 6 teaching hours
METHODS/ short theoretical discussions, presentation, experiential learning, role-plays, exercises
ACTIVITIES
MATERIALS/ course book, flip chart, paper and crayons, laptop
MEDIA NEEDED
TARGET GROUP Educators/carers/foster parents

Learning. Begins in the womb, and is accompanying our lives so naturally that we are not even aware of
it. Through imitation, practice, planned and unplanned activities, daily experiences, encounters, we learn.
There is however a short period in our lives when the learning process is directed, intentional, organized,
and unfortunately not so natural and smooth: it is called School. Sometimes in the process of learning we
meet obstacles, have difficulties and in some cases confront learning disabilities. These are special cases
that need special attention and professional help to be able to go on.
Other times the obstacles of learning are not caused by disabilities, nor the lack of intelligence or
will, but because we are not motivated to learn. The fire that once burned and urged from the inside to
discover the world and ourselves, that fire is out. Negative thoughts, believes, feelings are quenching the
learning motivation, leaving us feeling helpless, without confidence, hopeless.
In this unit we approach the topic of learning difficulties, disorders and learning motivation, with the
desire to bring understanding to this issues, and promoting the best ways to deal with the problems that
we face in the learning process.

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U N IT V.  |  LE ARN ING DIFFICU LTIES AN D LE ARN ING MOTIVATION
V. 1.
Learning Difficulties / Disabilities / Disorders
LEARNING Participants will familiarize with the most common types of learning difficulties
OUTCOMES or disabilities: dyslexia, dysgraphia, dyscalculia, ADD.
Participants will understand the reasons that hide behind learning difficulties.
Participants will be able to recognize the signs and symptoms of learning difficulties.
CONTENT What are learning difficulties, categories (dyslexia, dysgraphia, dyscalculia,
DESCRIPTION dyspraxia, attention disorders, memory disorders)
Signs of learning difficulties (in speaking, reading, writing, thinking)
back to the basics: body-image, eye-hand coordination, main thinking processes,
self-correcting
TIME FRAME 2 hrs
(TEACHING HOURS)
METHODS/ACTIVITIES Presentation, practice, experiential learning, self-evaluation
PROPOSED
RESOURCES NEEDED Worksheets, flip chart papers, crayons, didactic tools
NR. OF PARTICIPANTS Up to 15
Learning disorders are an umbrella term for a wide variety of learning problems. We use different
terms to accentuate the severity of the problem: the term ‘learning difficulties’ shows a temporal, not se-
vere learning problem caused usually by an external factor, such as missing from school for a period, while
`learning disabilities` and ‘learning disorders’ are more severe learning problems that affect more than one
area, causing school-failure. In this subunit we will present the most common types of learning disorders,
the specific areas which are affected and the signs that help to recognize a deficitary functioning.
Key terms: learning development, dyslexia, dysgraphia, dyscalculia, dyspraxia, attention disorders, visual
memory, auditorial memory, fine and gross motor skills, body-image.
Learning disorders are an umbrella term for a wide variety of learning problems. We use different
terms to accentuate the severity of the problem: the term ‘learning difficulties’ shows a temporal, not
severe learning problem caused usually by an external factor, such as missing from school for a period,
while `learning disabilities` and ‘learning disorders’ are more severe learning problems that affect more
than one area, causing school-failure.
Behind this disabilities / disorders usually are multiple causes, some may be neurological deficits, others are
specific developmental problems, or deficiencies of different areas, and they may vary from one child to an-
other. However, we would like to accentuate that the problems or deficiencies children may have in different
areas making learning difficult for them, are not ‘disabilities’ in the negative sense that they must live with it for a
life and we cannot do anything but accept it. The word ‘disorder’, ‘dis-order’ describes accurately the problem
of those with learning difficulties: there is a different order/arrangement in the mind of these children which
makes them see, hear and understand (receive and process information) differently than the rest of us.
120
Learning difficulties
So a learning disorder is not a problem with intelligence, learning disorders can occur in children with
normal and high intellectual function. Actually, when there is a discrepancy between potential and actual
levels of school performance as predicted by the child`s intellectual abilities, we must think of a specific
learning disorder that causes it. Nor is it a problem of lack of motivation, even if as a result of repeated failure
in school the children can lose their motivation to learn.
The most common types of learning disabilities involve problems with reading, writing, math, diffi-
culties in concentration or attention, and are called dyslexia, dysgraphia, dyscalculia.
Dyslexia – learning disabilities in reading
A reading disability can affect any part of the reading process, including
ƒƒ difficulty with accurate or fluent word recognition, or both,
ƒƒ word decoding,
ƒƒ reading rate,
ƒƒ prosody (oral reading with expression),
ƒƒ reading comprehension.
At a basic level, a child with reading disability finds it difficult to make a relationship between sounds,
letters and words. Common indicators of problems at this basic level include difficulty to break up words
into their component sounds, syllables, and difficulty with matching letter combinations to specific sounds.
How does it look like a reading disability? It may differ from child to child, but very often in spite of know-
ing the specific sounds and letters, while reading, children confuse the similar ones, or they may change
the order of letters, they read slowly, make frequent reading errors, try to guess the words reading only
the beginning of it, etc.
They fear oral reading, their oral reading is monotone, lacking any expression, they do not make paus-
es, don`t stop at the end of phrases, don`t use their tone to express a question or any emotions.
They put so much effort in recognizing the words, that their attention is totally absorbed at this level,
which may lead to the next level of reading problems, the comprehension problems.
The comprehension problem is the inability to grasp the meaning of words, phrases, and paragraphs.
Even when the child reads fluently may appear comprehension problems: they don`t know what they
have read about, don`t remember basic things from it, cannot answer questions based on their lecture,
cannot collect basic information from the text read.
Signs of reading difficulty include problems with:
ƒƒ breaking up words into their component sounds, syllables
ƒƒ letter and word recognition
ƒƒ reading speed and fluency
ƒƒ general vocabulary skills
Dysgraphia – learning disabilities in writing
A writing disability may, or may not connect to a reading disability. Typically, dysgraphia affects writing
skills, which fall below those expected, based on the child’s age, intelligence and education. It is recognized
by a combination of:
ƒƒ grammatical and punctuation errors
ƒƒ multiple spelling errors
ƒƒ poor paragraph organization
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U N IT V.  |  LE ARN ING DIFFICU LTIES AN D LE ARN ING MOTIVATION
ƒƒ excessively poor penmanship
ƒƒ difficulty in tasks that require composition of written text
Dysgraphia can involve the physical act of writing, or the mental activity of comprehending and synthe-
sizing information. Basic writing disorder refers to physical difficulty forming words and letters. Expressive
writing disability indicates a struggle to organize thoughts on paper. Symptoms of it include problems with:
ƒƒ neatness and consistency of writing
ƒƒ accurately copying letters and words
ƒƒ spelling consistency
ƒƒ writing organization and coherence
How does it look like the writing of someone with dysgraphia? Words misspelled, missing letters, missing punc-
tuation, missing accents. The size of letters is not uniform, handwriting and typing is mixed, sometimes letters
are unrecognizable, words or sentences follow one after the other without using marks, just like a river of
words. Sometimes they copy texts accurately, but when it comes to write after dictation or to compose a
text, their writing is full of the above mentioned errors. They also may not use capital letters for names or
at the beginning of new sentences. Their phrases may lack coherence, the reader cannot get the hang of it.
Dyscalculia – learning disabilities in math
Dyscalculics are often referred as having a poor “number sense”. Dyscalculia seems to be a brain-
based condition, some possible causes of it are: genetics, brain development and environment, but it is
not clear yet how much the brain differences are shaped by the different causes.
It involves difficulties learning math concepts such as:
ƒƒ Quantity, quantity relations (same, more, less)
ƒƒ place value
ƒƒ time
ƒƒ difficulty organizing numbers
ƒƒ difficulty understanding how problems are organized on the page
ƒƒ difficulty using operation signs
Math learning problems range from mild to severe and manifest themselves in a variety of ways. Most
common are difficulties with efficient recall of basic arithmetic facts and reliability in written computa-
tion. Many children experience difficulty bridging informal math knowledge to formal school math. A less
common math disability derives from significant visual-spatial-motor disorganization.
Learning disabilities in math vary greatly depending on the child`s other strengths and weaknesses. A
child`s ability to do math can be affected differently by a language learning disability, or a visual disorder or
a difficulty with sequencing, memory or organization.
Signs of a learning difficulty in math: A child with a math–based learning disorder may struggle with
memorization and organization of numbers (increasing, decreasing order), operation signs, and number
“facts” (like 5+5=10 or 5x5=25). Children with math learning disorders might also have trouble with
counting principles (such as counting by 2s or counting by 5s) or have difficulty telling time. They might
use their fingers in upper grades too for operations over 10. Some of them may know the general rules
but cannot apply them, or they cannot understand/ resolve math problems formulated in words, cannot
translate them into mathematical language. The reverse may also be true, that they cannot apply math
concepts to everyday life, including money matters such as estimating the total cost, making exact change,
figuring out a tip, have problems with measuring things. They usually have difficulties understanding infor-
mation shown on graphs or charts. Their sense of locality is poor, being afraid of getting lost.
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Learning difficulties
ADD/ADHD – attention disorder and hyperactivity
Although Attention Disorder is not a learning disorder, most of the time it generates learning difficul-
ties. According to a 2002 data, 32-40 % of those with ADHD repeat school-year or abandon school, and
only 5-10 % of them gets to study in universities. The reason is obvious: their problems with concentra-
tion, attention, to follow instructions, their inability to sit still and be quiet for a long time make it harder to
fit in the classroom and study. But that doesn`t mean that kids with ADD/ADHD can`t succeed at school.
It means they need special attention and help from professionals, teachers and parents/carers to succeed.
There is not easy to tell if a child has attention problems or is just “childish”. Kid`s who can`t sit still,
who never seem to listen, who don`t follow instructions or who blurt out inappropriate comments may
have ADD/ADHD, but are sometimes labeled as troublemakers or undisciplined. Inattention, hyperactiv-
ity and impulsivity are the three territories that demand special observation in their case. There are kids
who have an attention disorder without being hyperactive, and they may not get so much attention and
unfortunately neither get help.
On the other hand, several symptoms of ADHD are similar to other mental health problems, like
anxiety, depression, personality disorder, so only authorized mental health professionals can diagnose
ADHD. Keeping this in mind, we enumerate some of the signs and symptoms of ADHD as listed in the
DSM-5, (The American Psychiatric Association`s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, Fifth edition). Please
observe that there must be at least six of the signs enumerated symptoms present, and they must have
been present for at least 6 months. Also ADHD symptoms must be noticed before the age of 7.
Signs of inattention:
1. Often fails to give close attention to details or makes careless mistakes in schoolwork, or with other
activities
2. Often has trouble holding attention on tasks or play activities.
3. Often does not seem to listen when spoken to directly.
4. Often does not follow through on instructions and fails to finish schoolwork, chores.
5. Often has trouble organizing tasks and activities.
6. Often avoids, dislikes, or is reluctant to do tasks that require mental effort over a long period of
time (such as schoolwork or homework).
7. Often loses things necessary for tasks and activities (e.g. school materials, pencils, books, tools, wal-
lets, keys, paperwork, eyeglasses, mobile telephones).
8. Is often easily distracted
9. Is often forgetful in daily activities.
Signs of hyperactivity and impulsivity:
1. Often fidgets with or taps hands or feet, or squirms in seat.
2. Often leaves seat in situations when remaining seated is expected.
3. Often runs about or climbs in situations where it is not appropriate (
4. Often unable to play or take part in leisure activities quietly.
5. Is often “on the go” acting as if “driven by a motor”.
6. Often talks excessively.
7. Often blurts out an answer before a question has been completed.
8. Often has trouble waiting his/her turn.
9. Often interrupts or intrudes on others (e.g., butts into conversations or games)
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V. 2. We presented in detail what are the learning disabilities/disorders, what are the signs of it, and we also
have learned that behind these problems is the different arrangement of the brain. The brain of the chil-
Helping a child with a learning disorder dren with learning disabilities are wired differently, they see, hear and understand differently than the rest
of us. Researches demonstrated that due to the brain`s neuroplasticity, through learning and experiences
we can make new connections in the brain and rewire it.
This means that by specific activities, in time, we can progressively fill up the holes and help the chil-
dren gradually improve their school performance and reach their true potential.
LEARNING Participants will know how to help in the learning process. Areas where we can work:
OUTCOMES Participants will recognize the specific area where the child needs support and help. 1. Body image
Participants will be able to plan and implement life-related learning sessions for 2. Space orientation
the child. 3. Sounds, letters and spelling
CONTENT Improving body-image and directions 4. Writing, Reading and Comprehension
DESCRIPTION Improving reading and writing skills 5. Numbers, Quantity, relations, and Time
Improving memory: visual, auditory 6. Mental operations: comparing, analyzing, organizing
Improving attention 7. Memory
Improving in maths 8. Attention
Mediating the information to the child
Common mistakes while learning with children General rules for practicing with the child:
TIME FRAME 2 teaching hours ƒƒ Plan to practice regularly with the child, developing not only one area, but as many as possible.
ACTIVITIES Presentation, practice, experiential learning, self-evaluation ƒƒ The time frame depends on the ability of the child, but you can plan about 1 hour.
ƒƒ Children can focus if they are active during the activities and their interest is kept awake. This can
RESOURCES Worksheets, flip chart papers, crayons, didactic tools
be achieved only if you do a type of activity for a couple of minutes (5-10) and then change, doing
NEEDED
something else. Do not push a child if you see the signs of weariness, but try to keep his interest
NR. OF Up to 15 and attention.
PARTICIPANTS ƒƒ Practice weekly or twice a week in the same time, same hour, (for example every Monday and
Wednesday , between 11-12 a.m. or between 4-5 p.m. Choose the time according to the child`s
Helping a child with learning disorders requires special training and is absolutely necessary for carers schedule, when not very tired.)
to cooperate with professionals. This subunit proposes to present some techniques that help in the spe- ƒƒ Plan the activities so that after a job when the child was sitting at the desk, next he will have to
cific areas where developmental problems are not so severe. Presents ways to fill in the holes, connecting move or change the place, position.
learning experiences with real-life, creating new wires in the brain. ƒƒ Let the child work alone, but sit next to or in front of the child. You can help if you see he/she is
Key terms: body-image, space orientation, reading skills, writing skills, comprehension, motor skills, just `gambling`. Guide the process with questions, `preparing` by it the next step/ move.
attention, problem solving
Body image and Space Orientation
Helping a child with a learning disability or learning disorder is not an easy task, and requires special
training. Don`t try to do it alone. If you think something is wrong, you see the child struggling with school, Almost every child who struggles with a learning disability has a poor sense of body image and space
don`t wait, time will not help. The best you can do is to communicate with the teachers, they probably orientation. They need to experience their body and the image of it to make connections between words
also noticed it. It`s also important to have the child evaluated and tested by a qualified professional. Usually and positions, so that their brain can finally be able to “see” (imagine) the movements without moving,
there is a psychologist in the school who is able to test and diagnose learning disabilities, or you may seek decode pictures, fitting pieces together.
a child psychiatrist or a speech therapist. Beside creating situations to experience their body and movement (do they know the name of all the
When you have a diagnose, there is another key-word to helping the child: cooperation. Cooperation parts of the body, like chin, jowl, ankle, heel, scruff...?) we can use pictures, different posters and specially
with the therapist who is working with him, cooperation with teachers, and you may like to get to know designed puzzles to train their brain see what they should see and understand.
other families who also struggle with learning disorders. Their experiences, advice can help a lot and is
always good to know that you are not alone with your problem.
And there is more to do, if you want to help. Lots of systematic work, but not that difficult. It can be
fun and creative, if you put heart in it.

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ACTIVITY: PUZZLE SERIES
Time frame: between 5–10 minutes
Type of activity: individual (the child works alone, following the instructions of the helper)
Materials needed: puzzle (Subunit 2, material nr1)
The activity develops: left/right orientation, body image, attention, planning skills, verbalization
Description of the activity: The puzzle series contains a number of 7-8 different puzzles, which have
to be used in numerical order, because their difficulty is increasing progressively, and the abilities forming
are built one on the other.
Begin with the first puzzle, tell the child what is in the picture and that his job is to fit the pieces to-
gether. Let him work alone, but sit next to the child and help if you see he/she is just `gambling`. Guide
the process with questions like: how would you start, which piece should come first? What is next in the
body? Do you think the hand is in the right side now? And so on...
If he can do the puzzle correctly by himself, give full marks for it, and that`s it for that day with puzzles.
Next time you take the next puzzle from the series. If he cannot resolve the assembling by himself, give
him help, and the next time you will do the same puzzle, same way, until he is able do complete it alone.
Be careful to play with it for no longer then 6-8 minutes. The order of the puzzle series is:
ƒƒ Picture (or drawing) of a child, front view
ƒƒ Picture of a child from profile
ƒƒ Picture of a child moving (running)
ƒƒ Picture of animals (chicken, dog, cow, horse, etc)
ƒƒ Picture of a hand with nails
ƒƒ Puzzles cut in different (unexpected) shapes
ACTIVITY: SPACE ORIENTATION
Time frame: 5–10 minutes
Type of activity: individual (the child works alone, following the instructions of the helper)
Materials needed: toys, shapes, colored pencils, etc.
The activity develops: space orientation, and attention, seriality, following instructions, memory, gross
and fine motor skills
Description of the activity: There are no special rules to this one. You give the instructions, and the child
has to follow them. You can choose from indications like:
ƒƒ Put the toy / draw a star ... (on, under, behind, near, to the left, to the right, in, above, under etc)
ƒƒ Bring me back the toys in the same order as you have received them. First the ... (attention: use at
the beginning 2– 3 toys, and increase the number when you see the child is ready to face a more
difficult challenge)
ƒƒ Move 2 steps forward and then turn to the right....
ƒƒ Bring me the big yellow book from the upper shelf ....
ƒƒ Arrange the table, where do you put the fork, on which side of the plate?
ƒƒ Writing different shapes, letters, while telling the direction you go. Ex: writing a B they say: up,
round, round, up, round etc. Or the sleepy 8: left, right, left, right.
ƒƒ Where do i see the ....?
ƒƒ Practice the points of the compass while traveling, beginning with the position of different
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Helping a child with a learning disorder
important locations for him like playground, school, ice cream shop, using as a point of reference
his own house.
ƒƒ Draw maps: about the house, the way from home to school or other tracks. Make surprise-maps!
Hide a little surprise (or a task) and give him a map to find it. Challenge him to make one by
himself and give it to you to find the goal.
Extra tip: Play and develop space orientation with everything, everywhere! You can adapt the instruc-
tions while you are on the street, or when shopping, anywhere.
Sounds, letters and spelling
If a child has problems with writing or reading, usually they have problems, lacuna on more basic lev-
els– like matching the sounds with letters, differentiating sounds, spelling and therefore before working
with the pencil, work with the child`s ears!
ACTIVITY: DEVELOPING SOUND-LETTER AWARENESS
Time frame: 3-5 minutes
Type of activity: individual (the child works alone, following the instructions of the helper)
Materials needed: -
The activity develops: attention, working memory, sound differentiating, sound-letter awareness
Description of the activity: Prepare a list of words, or letters you will work with. If you know the most
frequent errors a child makes (take a look in his/her notes) that`s a good starting point. You can concen-
trate on those while practicing, and make sure to work only with one or two of them a day. It is important
to let the child to find the errors and correct himself, do not tell him at once what did he say wrong, only
that the answer is not correct. Help him out only when he cannot think of the error. You can choose
from different types of activities, like:
ƒƒ Finding rhymes to words
ƒƒ Word spelling. Begin with easy ones and then longer, more difficult words. Practice with about
6-8 words, and then do something else.
ƒƒ Differentiate the sounds. For example: If the child is mixing up B and P, you can ask : Do you
hear the B or P in the word: policemen, bird, bump, dumb, etc ? Where do you hear it? (at the
beginning, in the middle, at the end of the word)
ƒƒ Long and short sounds. In Hungarian for example, there are lots of `long sounds` which are
written with a double letter, like ll, or pp, mm, ssz, or specific pairs of sounds – a short and a long
one of the same sound, for example o-ó, ö-ő. To practice these you can ask: Which sound do you
hear as long in this word: pillanat? or tűz?
ƒƒ Playing with letters, syllables. (scrabble for example, or the letters from the registration plate of
cars finding words, names with them)
ƒƒ Words that have a meaning if spelling from the back
ƒƒ Words that have meaning if you leave the first/last letter
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ACTIVITY: IMPROVING THE WRITING SKILLS OF A CHILD
Time frame: 10–15 minutes
Type of activity: individual (the child works alone, following the instructions of the helper)
Materials needed: textbook, exercise-book, pencil.
The activity develops: writing skills, attention, auditory memory.
Description of the activity: After working with the child`s ears, you can try to dictate a little too. Use
short texts, and interesting ones, that match with their interest, and age. You may use stories about ani-
mals, children in different situations, humorous stories that relate to their everyday lives and also others
that are unknown to them. For the beginning, 2-3 lines is enough and as they progress you can reach 8-10
lines. Don`t make practicing too long. Less is more, if you persevere.
Again, let the child correct himself. In the first round, ask the child to read to himself what he wrote,
and correct himself if he finds anything to correct. Next, handle out the text you used and ask him to
check himself out and correct what is needed. The child may use a different color. If you are practicing in
the same exercise-book, or collect and keep the sheets of paper the child writes on, then you can follow
up the progress and the child will become more self confident about his own knowledge. He will also get
used to check on himself and his work.
Activities to improve the reading and comprehension skills of a child
Begin with short texts written with big– size letters, /cartoons, / illustrated books.
Tips that could work:
ƒƒ Read aloud together, in his rhythm. Help him out with the longer/difficult words.
ƒƒ If the child reads the words first to himself than says them aloud, stop him/her and ask to read
aloud even if he is reading slowly. Reading the words two times takes it longer! Instead of that
technique, teach him to read by syllables. Practice with him aloud.
ƒƒ Choose just a few paragraphs to read.
ƒƒ Ask questions about the paragraph, like: `why did he say that?`, what would you do in his place?`
etc. Make the reading personal, involve his imagination and emotions.
ƒƒ Stir the child`s curiosity. Don`t tell him the background of the story or discussion he is reading
about in the chosen paragraph, and make him guess, than the child can find out if it was right.
ƒƒ After reading a part of the story, ask him to guess how it will continue, then you can read it to him.
AUDITORY MEMORY GAMES AND ACTIVITIES THAT ALSO
IMPROVE ATTENTION
Time frame: up to 5–6 minutes
Type of activity: in pairs (the child is following the instructions of the helper)
Materials needed: –
The activity develops: auditory and working memory, attention.
List of Letters and Numbers
The child has to repeat a series of numbers or letters or both. It is important to begin with a list of
3, then 4, 5 (and so on) numbers. You say it first, then the child repeats it. Then you say the next group.
For example:
1– 5– 6 8 9 6 1 E C V I M B O T R 3DT1
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Helping a child with a learning disorder
2– 4– 8 1 4 7 6 A R T E S A G E I X MK58
7– 6– 4 3 5 7 4 l K P O HEION F7R2
Practice should not last more than 3-5 minutes so the child will not get bored or overwhelmed. Work
at a time only with numbers or letters and only when he is used with this type of practicing mix the letters
and numbers.
On a second level you can use decimals: 12, 54, 89 / 33, 65, 17 / and so on, increasing the number of
elements on your list.
Learn poems, short texts „by heart”.
Help the child learn the text sentence – by– sentence. If he knows the first sentence, you tell him the
second. He repeats the second sentence, if he was correct, go on, let him repeat the first and second
sentence together. If he is making errors, don`t correct him directly, instead you may say: “listen again
carefully:” and repeat him the sentence. This way he has to pay attention to what he said wrong or missed
out, and correct himself. Go like this through the end of the text.
When practicing with texts, choose carefully the paragraphs or poems. Begin with only 3-4 sentences,
or even less, depending on the age of the child.
Extra Tip: To involve the long term memory too, you can re-learn the text next day / next week, but
complicating it a bit. You can add new words to the sentences, or you may add a new sentence to the text.
Example: Walking on the street at night can be very dangerous. Especially if you wear dark clothes. Car driv-
ers can`t see you very well. It is clever to wear a reflective jacket. (In the light of the car, you will shine like a star.)
Arrange words in alphabetical order
A good and interesting activity is when the child has to arrange in alphabetical order the words.
Choose words from the same theme, like: blue, yellow, red, pink (colors); run, stand, jump, turn (move-
ment), desk, chair, bed, shelf (furniture); orange, grape, melon, cherries (fruits).
Playing with numbers
Description of the activity: Tell the child a serial of numbers (depending on age, capacity) and ask him
to put them in increasing/decreasing order.
You can also ask the child to repeat the numbers, following a direction.
Example: Listen to the numbers: 9– 5– 1– 3 . Now repeat them except the first! (5-1-3) (second, /last,/
third). First say the list of numbers, and after that the rules. This way the child will have to pay attention
all the way, keeping in mind the numbers and the rule, and handle the numbers in his working memory.
If you see that he cannot memorize 4 numbers, try with 3, and then step up with 4, 5.
Activities that improve Visual memory
Memory game cards
Use a set of Memory Game cards. Cards with bright, clear pictures are the easiest ones to start with. 
For the beginning, choose 6-8 pairs of cards, or even less, adapted to the ability of the child.
Memory game with objects (you can play with colors or wood/plastic numbers too)
You will need a plain tray, a variety of household objects and/or small toys, and a cloth to cover the
items. Or, children love to play games where they have to close their eyes. You may ask the child to close
eyes until you say. Make sure your child knows the names of all the objects or toys you will use.
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U N IT V.  |  LE ARN ING DIFFICU LTIES AN D LE ARN ING MOTIVATION
These are the basic steps for playing this game:  adapt the game according to the age and ability of the
child by altering the number of objects shown and/or the time given to look at them!
Without the child seeing, place a few items (begin with 3 pieces, if that is much, begin with 2) on the
tray, and cover them up.
Remove the cover and let the child take a look at the tray for a few seconds (5-10 seconds). Try to dis-
courage the child from saying the names of the objects out loud, as this can trigger an auditory memory
response instead of visual memory.
Cover the tray again and ask the child to name the objects that were on the tray.
Variations of the game:
Instead of asking your child to name the objects seen, secretly take away one object, uncover the tray
and ask your child to tell you what object was removed.
That is harder when the objects on the tray have been rearranged as well! (you can do all this under
cover of the cloth, or ask the child to close eyes!)
You may also play turns, when the child is hiding objects and you have to guess. In this case, you may
intentionally make errors, and let the child correct you, or you can teach him to pay attention because you
may intentionally make mistakes and you want the child to catch you whenever it happens.
ACTIVITIES WITH TOYS THAT INVOLVE MEMORY AND
SPACE ORIENTATION
To improve a child`s visual memory and orientation, while developing his thinking too, you can use toys
that the child loves like Lego for example, or wood cubes, wood tetris, and anything you have at home.
To assemble a house, a ship, a car or anything from legos using the guidebook is excellent in developing
the child`s space orientation. Let the child do the work, and try to help him only by putting questions to
make him think about the best way to do it, to begin with and so on. If he cannot do it by himself, then
show him while explaining what are you doing, then pick apart the legos and make him do it again by
himself.
Using wood/plastic coloured cubes or balls to make patterns
There are lots of toys that can be used to develop not only creativity but visual memory and orienta-
tion. We only need to adapt them to our need. If there is a toy that uses patterns, we can work with it to
develop memory by letting the child do the pattern while looking at the paragon, and asking him to speak
out loud what is he doing, or telling the directions. (Ex. I will start with the centre of the picture and use
a green cube. To the left and to the right I will need 2-2 yellow cubes). If he speaks out loud, you know
how he thinks and may help him or teach him to make a plan.
The next step/level is to remake the model `by heart`. Let him “memorize” the paragon, then turn
down the picture of it and the child can try to do the pattern again. When he is finished, he can verify
himself and correct himself if needed.
Tips for Toys you can use:
Wood Tetris: Wood Tangram:
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Helping a child with a learning disorder
Geometrical forms on Cork Wood beads (visual memory,
gross and fine motor skills)
Cards with patterns like above can be made for all types of toys. They will improve logical thinking,
visual memory, planning skills.
Best practice:
NILD Educational Therapy is a therapy that focuses to strengthen the underlying causes of learning
difficulties. It was developed in the US, and for some years it is present in Europe too.
NILD interventions can be one-on-one or small group. Each session includes a variety of techniques
designed to address students’ specific areas of difficulty and to improve their overall ability to think, rea-
son, and process information. Techniques emphasize basic skill areas such as reading, writing, spelling,
and math, as well as applying reasoning skills within each area. Students are taught by highly trained NILD
Educational Therapists who utilize a unique methodology.
Further information about this therapy you can find at: www.nild.org, www.nild.hu.
Mental operations: comparing, analyzing, organizing
These operations are the basis of all mathematical thinking. Kids with dyscalculia know only theoretically
what they mean, but not in practice, or they cannot transfer the knowledge from paper to everyday life
or the reverse. Think of ways the child can understand what it means: equal, the same, compare,organize.
First let the child play and organize, then write down in mathematical terms what he did.
You can use toys, buttons, beans, numbers and objects or geometrical shapes of different size. Prac-
tice until he understands quantity, and uses correctly the mathematical terms and signs.
The Ten Commandments Of Learning With a Child: (avoiding the common mistakes)
1. Make the learning interesting. Practice does not have to be boring.
2. Make a bridge between what you teach/learn and everyday experience. Use as many sensory ways
as possible while `learning`.
3. Learn while you play. Play, while you learn.
4. Less is more. Stop the practicing before it becomes dragging, but practice regularly.
5. Don`t assume that the child knows. Instead ask questions, ask him to explain what does a word/
expression mean and you will find out if the child really knows.
6. Don`t give immediate explanation if the child does not know/understand something. Mediate infor-
mation. Ask questions, let him find the answer.
7. If you ask a question, wait for the answer, don`t hurry the child. (Count till 10 :-))
8. Let the child verify and correct himself.
9. Fear will never help the learning process. Teach the child it is `ok` to make mistakes. We can always
correct them and learn from them. In fact, mistakes are the best teachers!
10. Help him until he is self– confident. Let him know you think that he can, he is able.
+1. Celebrate every little step forward! It matters!
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U N IT V.  |  LE ARN ING DIFFICU LTIES AN D LE ARN ING MOTIVATION Learning motivation

V. 3. ACTIVITY: BEAN/ COIN HUNTING

Learning motivation Goal: warming up, introducing the theme of the subunit.
Time frame: 10-12 minutes
Type of activity: small group, up to 4-6 people who play, the rest of the group is watching. At the end,
there is a debriefing time that takes a few minutes.
Materials needed: a bag of beans or/and coins, table.
LEARNING Participants will understand and recognize the components of motivation, Description of the activity: Ask for 4-6 volunteers who will take a sit around the table. The rest of the
OUTCOMES will be able to recognize the reasons behind the lack of learning motivation in group is watching in silence. Empty the beans or coins from the bag on the table, and ask the participants/
children. Participants will understand how extrinsic and intrinsic motivation players to take for themselves as much as they want. Keep the beans on the table in front of each player.
works and the connection between age and the type of motivation that There will be two rounds. In the first round, everyone will take a turn ,and take to himself from a player
works better. Participants will be able to plan and use systematically both he chooses, as many beans as he wants. On the second round, each player will have its turn and give to
types of motivation with the kids. another player as many beans as he likes.
CONTENT Amotivation. Why? Feelings and bad experiences At the end of the second turn, ask the players to talk about their thoughts and feelings during the
DESCRIPTION Extrinsic motivation game. The observers too, may share their thoughts and observations. Topics to talk about: Why did you
Intrinsic motivation volunteered to the activity? (motivation) how did it feel to take away from someone? And to give? How
Discovering the world of the child did you choose to whom to give or from who will you take away?
Goal-setting: challenge, progressiveness, effort
TIME FRAME 2 hrs Motivation
(TEACHING
HOURS) Motivation, simply put, is the desire to do something. It is an internal state or condition (sometimes
described as a need, desire, or want) that serves to activate or energize behavior and give it direction.
METHODS/ Presentation, practice, experiential learning, brainstorming, self-evaluation
When it comes to learning and school achievement, motivation plays a role as important as cognitive
ACTIVITIES
abilities, because it fuels all the learning process. It responds to questions like: Why and what do people
PROPOSED
learn? How much energy do they invest in it? When and why do they give up learning? Do they give up
RESOURCES Worksheets, flip chart papers, crayons, didactic tools on learning really, or on something else?
NEEDED
Motivation is a complex concept, many motives work together and shape the behavior of a person,
NR. OF Up to 15 and these motives change in time. They are like the pieces of a puzzle that fit together and shape the
PARTICIPANTS behavior. During the last decades, studies on motivation emphasized different topics, like the need for
achievement and success-or failure oriented thinking, extrinsic/intrinsic motivation, goal-oriented behav-
This subunit is divided in two parts. In the first part we will get a theoretical approach to learning ior, social motivation, to arrive in our days to a more inclusive approach.
motivation. We will learn about the basic motives that shape our behavior and in the second part we will Specialist argue that there is not so important which kind of motivation fuels the activity, as long as the
take a more personal and practical view, to see what factors lead to losing motivation and how can we person is actually motivated to do the work. People are different, and situations and circumstances also
motivate children to learn. differ, and it is very possible that a technique is not working for everyone. A combination of motives like
Learning outcomes: Content description: Learning motivation, components. Lack of learning moti- intrinsic motivation, concrete goal setting, external reward like positive feedback, self-esteem together
vation: negative thoughts, feelings and bad experiences. Extrinsic and intrinsic motivation, Discovering the may lead to success. There are not good and bad, but working and not working ways to motivate.
world of the child as the key to motivation. Helping tips and ideas. Components of Learning Motivation
Time frame: 2 hours Research data shows that learning motivation`s level is the highest in the elementary school and shows
Materials needed: bag of beans or coins, papers and colored pencils a decreasing tendency beginning somewhere in the 3rd -6th grade and continues in high school too. This is
Key terms: learning motivation, self-esteem, extrinsic motivation, intrinsic motivation, goal-setting, true for average students and also true for children with learning disabilities, with the only difference that
social motivation. they are more motivated than their average classmates! Surprised? Probably, because we would presume
they are less motivated. Studies also revealed that adult`s (teacher`s) perception of how motivated the
children are, differs from what the kids themselves report.
Still, there is a decreasing tendency in children`s learning motivation as school-years go by and it is
important to find out why, and what is adults`s (teachers, parents) responsibility in the process.

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U N IT V.  |  LE ARN ING DIFFICU LTIES AN D LE ARN ING MOTIVATION
There are different theoretical approaches to the subject of motivation. In this presentation we will
introduce the model of László Tóth, because it has a particular relevance for school learning.
László Tóth distinguishes three groups of motives:
1. the need for self-esteem (the person`s preoccupation to maintain and increase self confidence),
2. curiosity (which comes from the thirst for knowledge and understanding, and stays at the basis of
every activity of research and discovery), and
3. social motives (the need to have emotionally satisfying relationships).
1. Self-esteem as learning motivation
The level of our learning achievement is greatly influenced by what we believe about ourselves, how con-
fident we are. The sense of being capable to accomplish something is the result of our past experiences, as a
result of the feedback we received from the people important to us and how much could we reach the level
of our own expectations as well as the expectations of others (parents, peers, teachers, carers). Throughout
school, the result of our work is labeled as good or bad, we receive accomplishments, grades, and sometimes
those labels lead to feelings like being accepted or rejected. No wonder school and learning motivation starts
to decrease already in the primary school years. So in this first group of motives, anxiety and the need for
achievement appear as the main motives that shape our learning motivation.
Students are not motivated in the face of failure. They give different reasons for their success or fail-
ure in various school subjects and these reasons are consistent with their self-concept of ability in that
domain. Positive feelings and thoughts /beliefs related to a specific task or subject ( `i am good at this`)
decreases the level of anxiety. Children who view poor performance as the result of low ability expect
failure to occur again and again, experience negative thoughts and feelings (`I am the only one with seven
mistakes. The teacher will not like me because I am a dumb kid.`) Once these unfavorable motivational
beliefs have become part of a student`s theory of self, they will be activated again and again, creating
doubt and anxiety.
2. Curiosity as learning motivation
All children are characterized by curiosity, an eagerness to explore, discover the environment. Discov-
ering, knowing, understanding, stepping forward, gives a sense of independence, a sense of competence
and the joy of discovering, learning. (`I love learning about dinosaurs because they were so huge animals`
`I couldn`t whistle when I was four yrs old, but now I now` , `I wa).
Not all the children have the same level of curiosity, just like not every child is prone to anxiety, but
they all want to discover their environment. The problems appear when the subjects they learn seem to
be unimportant, not related to their life, seem weird and difficult to grasp, or they lose the thread. (`why
do I have to learn poems, what does it help me?`, or ` I will never ever in my life use these equations and
formulas` `Why do I need to know where is Guatemala?`.)
Curiosity in other order of ideas is called an intrinsic motivation – when the reward of the learning
effort is the knowledge himself.
3. Social motives as learning motivation
The third group of motives includes the motives of social acceptance, the need of the person to be
recognized, accepted, valued, loved by his social environment. He wants to feel good in school, in class
with his peers, to be appreciated, accepted, to feel important and needed. In lower grades children learn
in order to achieve the attention of the teacher, and the satisfaction of parents. The recognition of peers
is not so important in early ages, they learn to make parents happy, to be appreciated by the teacher. (`my
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Learning motivation
parents will be very upset with this mark`, `the teacher said my work was perfect and that I am a clever
girl` `The teacher scolded only me but I was not the only one doing it` ).
Later gaining a social position in the peer-group becomes more important and the student is putting the
recognition of peers before the approval of the teacher. (`I want to be in a small group with X or Y). If good
grades or knowledge is a way to recognition between schoolmates, kids will put effort, trying to gain it.
It is a recent discovering of the research work that when it comes to learning, kids – adolescents too–
say that the relationship with parents influences more their learning motivation then any other relation-
ship. If the parents show interest for school, learning, grades, that is a clear and important message to
their kids. Yes, the learn because of their parents ...
Opposite, if they feel unaccepted or rejected, if they do not feel appreciated by teachers, if they have
emotional problems (family conflicts, conflict with teachers, bully,etc.) the last thing they will care for will
be studying and grades. They will hate school because they will not have friends there for example.
Intrinsic and extrinsic motivation
The distinction between intrinsic and extrinsic motivation is made based on the type of reward the per-
son gets. Intrinsic motivation refers to behavior that is driven by internal rewards, in contrast with extrinsic
motivation, which involves engaging in a behavior in order to earn external rewards or avoid punishment. For
example, if an activity is done because the child hopes to receive sweets or praise or good grades, that is an
external reward, and thus had an extrinsic motivation. If a child finishes his chores to avoid punishment, that is
an extrinsic motivation too. But if a person is engaged in the activity for the joy of it, for example reads a book
because he is interested in the topic, that is an intrinsic motivation, because the reward is internal.
Educational specialist and adults in general argued for stirring the intrinsic motivation, saying that it is more
powerful and its results last longer than those of extrinsic motivation. Which is true, but in many cases there
is not such a motivation present yet and extrinsic motivation helps out in these situations. It is also possible
that along the way extrinsic motivation makes place to intrinsic, or that intrinsic motivation for some reason
disappears and only extrinsic motivation fuels the behavior. It is also proven by research that offering external
rewards for an already internally rewarding activity can actually make the activity less intrinsically rewarding.
If we think about motivations in a hierarchical order, then the goal is to be intrinsically motivated, as
the graphics suggest :
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U N IT V.  |  LE ARN ING DIFFICU LTIES AN D LE ARN ING MOTIVATION Learning motivation

„My writing is not nice.”

„I work hard but I don`t get 10.”
„Why do I always get scolded, while the teacher never says anything to other students?”
„Nobody wants to play with me in school.”
„The Chemistry class is boring. I don`t understand a word of what the teacher explains.”
„I study for class, but I forget everything when the teacher asks me to speak in front of the class.” or “I
get nervous and can`t find my words.” „I am afraid the others will tease me, or laugh at me if I am saying
something wrong.”
„I cannot keep the rhythm when the teacher is dictating.”
„The teacher said that with my grades I will never become a doctor.”
„ I always have a lot of mistakes on my tests.”
…And so on, the list may continue forever.

Extra tip of activity: make a list with the “explanations” the children in your care give, for their lack of
motivation and identify the motives behind it.
But if we think about our own experience, things are not black and white. We may be more or less Important is to analyze what we know. Does the child have a problem...
motivated in different stages of the process/activity, depending on several causes. So instead of weighing ƒƒ with the teacher
or comparing the motives, in our preoccupation to motivate the children in our care we should opt for ƒƒ with his classmates
the one that fits best the situation, child, us, the degree of involvement needed and so on. ƒƒ boring topics
ƒƒ with understanding the material
ƒƒ is he not sure about his intellectual abilities (what motivational beliefs are behind them?)
ACTIVITY: PERSONAL FLASHBACK ƒƒ does he have problems with a specific object/area
Goal: understanding and recognizing our own intrinsic/ extrinsic motivations . ƒƒ does he have problems with time management
Time frame: 10-12 minutes ƒƒ does he need professional help because he has a specific learning disorder?
Type of activity: individual, the second part in the big group. ƒƒ What do we need to provide and how?
Materials needed: - ƒƒ emotional support, comfort
Description of the activity: Take time to invoke a personal memory from the time you were in school ƒƒ success
and lost your learning motivation towards an object. Try to identify what learning motives were affected ƒƒ help to understand a difficult subject
and why? If you would like, you can share with the others the story, telling shortly what happened. ƒƒ learning techniques
ƒƒ exercise
Discovering the (inner and outer) World Of the Child. ƒƒ positive feedback, encouragement
The key to motivate a child is the child himself. We have seen before, that children are naturally moti- ƒƒ help in resolving personal conflicts, misunderstandings
vated to learn – but not anything that comes or is imposed to them,– they want to discover their world, ƒƒ rules, boundaries
with their senses, in a safe and emotionally positive atmosphere. ƒƒ higher expectations
How can we assure that children in our care will be and will stay motivated? ƒƒ goals; concrete, achievable goals
We have to focus on the motives that drive their behavior: ƒƒ role models
– the need for self-esteem
– their curiosity Using incentives, extrinsic motivation to motivate kids to learn (or motivate them do their chores)
– their need for emotionally satisfying relationships: safe, accepting, loving social environment.
If children lose their motivation or a change appears in their attitude towards school, we must find the
problem he is struggling with. There is always a hint to the child`s problem in his lamenting. They may say:
„I am not good in ..... (math)”
„I don`t like English, because I don`t like the English teacher.”
„I don`t want to go to school. The lady is not talking nice to us. She yelled to another kid in the class and I was
very afraid.”

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ACTIVITY: SUBSTITUTE THE P(PUNISHMENT, PREACHING) More helping ideas to motivate the child learning:
WITH AN R (REWARD) P/R
– arrange a pleasant learning corner/place where you can put soft blankets or pillows, books. Make it
Goal: Help the participants plan a comprehensible, age-adjusted set of expectations and a concrete inviting to cuddle there and be lost in reading for ex.
system of rewards. – put a clock on the wall (not a digital one) and discuss about the time limits and rules. (ex. If he starts
Time frame: 15-20 minutes studying, he cannot stand up and go to drink water or do something else for a half an our)– help
Type of activity: brainstorming, small groups. him stay focused.
Materials needed: papers, crayons. – use a special `grandma effect`: make a plan about what will the child do after studying. Make it to be
Description of the activity: appealing, to look forward to it and so that the child will want to finish his homework quick. (After
The 3 P: Preaching, Pressure, Punishment rarely works with kids. A much shorter way to get them do you finish your homework, I will read you a story / we will play with puppets/ eat a pudding/ make
what they have to, is to negotiate the rewards they are happy with. If we invite them to be our partners a surprise for someone)
in the planning process and let them have their word, while the adult has the final word, they are more – help with setting concrete goals. At the beginning of every school-year, the children decide to learn
motivated to “work”. The kids need independence and boundaries, and it is wise to keep that in mind. better or improve their grades, but that decision fades at the arrival of the first bad grade. Instead
So negotiate with the child. What do you expect him to do every day? Make a list of it, then choose 5-6 of general goals, help him make it concrete!
items that you really think as important. If the child is small (preschooler), the list should contain 2-3 items,
in the 2nd -4th grade about 4-5 items, and teens up to 7 (less is ok, but no more than 7 items). For example, Dan wants to improve his grades in the new semester. Great! You can help him achieve it
by making it concrete. Take a look together to the objects he is studying this semester, and what grades
JOB TO DO MONDAY TUESDAY WEDNESDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY SATURDAY does he have. Where can he improve? How much? A goal would be to improve his grades in Geography,
History and Modern Languages.
Wash your teeth √ √ √ √ √ √
Start homework √ √ √ √
LAST YEAR`S GRADES OBJECT NEW GOAL
at 4
7 Geography 8/9
Practicing the √ √
piano 8 History 9

Put away the toys 8 English 9

before dinner
Make calculuses, how will modify his average grade if he succeeds, and during the semester adjust
Than make together with the child a long „Reward-list” with the things the kids like, collect, etc. It may the plan to new circumstances. (a bad grade? Calculate what grade does he need to correct it and still
contain items like: achieve his goal. What has to be done for that? Who can help him? Name someone. How can he get
ƒƒ extra 10/20 minutes playing on the computer a better grade? Learning a poem? Making an extra project?) Encourage the child when he looses hope
ƒƒ stickers with little ones or would give up.
ƒƒ sweets It is important to set realistic achievable goals. Small steps need to be made in order to make sure he
ƒƒ money will have success and grow in self confidence.
ƒƒ playing together a social game
ƒƒ going to a movie Change his motivational beliefs.
ƒƒ going in a trip As we have seen previously, behind the fear of failure there is a negative belief, about the child`s poor
ƒƒ extra free time ability, or bad luck, about the relation between work and success. Make an effort to discover what are the
ƒƒ preparing a pudding in the kitchen together child`s hidden motivational beliefs and discuss about them. Bring in discussion positive role/models, exam-
ƒƒ going to a friend or inviting a friend etc ples from your or an acquaintance`s experience, arguments. Create learning situations where the child
You may put on the list items related or not to learning, as you would like, and depending the period can experience succeed. Maybe the child needs to improve his learning techniques in order to change the
(in vacation you may ask the kid other things to do). Make the list for a week, and at the end of the week belief that he cannot learn effectively.
you can discuss the results and pay the reward. -Positive Attitude! Teenagers especially, but small kids too are very sensible to critical remarks. Re-
Discuss with the child how many times can he miss items a week (3/week are o.k. , at 4 he receives for marks like “are you kidding me, or you really don`t understand?”, “how can you be so slow?”, “I am strug-
ex. less money, or a smaller reward) gling with you since kindergarten. Will you please finally pick up yourself?” make so much damage in the
child`s self-esteem. Don`t aggravate the situation with negative remarks or feelings.

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HANDOUTS to UNIT V.

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