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Bringing the biggest celebrity news right to you! As soon as WE know YOU know!!

The EPIC Love Triangle!

BREAKING NEWS: Kelly Clarkson
and…The Skipper???
I know what you’re thinking…”Isn’t The Skipper old enough
to be Kelly’s father?” and the answer is YES! Kelly Clarkson
was seen canoodling with none other than The
Skipper! After the live recording of The Voice,
the two were seen exiting the back door hand
in hand. Sources say the two got close during
a cruise Kelly was on. The Skipper was the
captain and according to sources, The Skipper
showed Kelly special treatment and took a big
liking to her right away. Kelly was allegedly
spotted leaving The Skipper’s captain’s
quarters before dawn most mornings and would most times be wearing his
captain’s hat and even his blue collared shirt. Despite the vast age difference between
the two, they seem to be inseparable and can’t get enough of each other. But trouble
may be on the horizon for the new couple; The Skipper’s first mate, Gilligan, went on
record to say Kelly and he are in love and are getting married. We did not see that one
coming! More details to come

By: Maria Roush


Snow White's’ new dwarves?
Last Thursday
afternoon Snow White
was seen in New
York’s Central Park
having a picnic….with
who you ask? Kili, Fili,
Ori, Dori, Nori, Bofur
and Balin from Thorin
Oakenshield’s
company! Has Snow
White moved on from her 7 adorable
dwarves to rugged, handsome ones? As
we all know, after the company of Thorin
Oakenshield managed to defeat Smaug
and claim back their home, Erebor, the
company has been sighted more and
more! With no dragons to defeat, the
company will have more free time. Snow
White had been living with her 7
dwarves until last September when she
moved into her own apartment stating
“the dwarves and I keep in touch
everyday FaceTiming. I just needed
some space and wanted to venture out
and make new friends.” Could Snow
White be growing up and looking for
more than friends? We asked for a
statement from the 7 original dwarves
back home and only Grumpy and Happy
spoke. Happy was more than content
with the decision of Snow White saying
he only wished the best for her and
knows the bond formed with them will
always be strong.
Grumpy on the other
hand...let’s just say he
was the opposite of
happy and said some
not so nice words. No
comment from the
company of Thorin
Oakenshield just yet.
By: Gabriela Antunez
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Dinosaurs at the Kardashians!!
Breaking new this Friday night!
Dinosaurs from Jurassic Park have been
released into the real world. The
Jenner’s are having a major break
down as a triceratops was seen eating
their newly
planted palm
trees. Kim
Kardashian
has told
everyone she
has seen a
pterodactyl
flying over
California. The government is advising
everyone to stay inside and ration your
food and water until the situation can
be controlled. We do not advise calling
animal control as they are not trained
for this type of situation at the moment
and will most likely not show up at all.
Some safety tips we can give out is DO
NOT attempt take selfies
with the dinosaurs, DO NOT
try and ride the dinosaurs,
DO NOT name the
dinosaurs…You are not
keeping them as a new pet. And
Finally…DO NOT feed the herbivores
your broccoli from dinner or they will
want to stay and they do not fit in your
bed. I should know, there is one in the
newsroom sleeping behind the camera.
Stay safe indoors everyone!
By: Jacquelyn Rankins

Our Favorite Doctors Did WHAT??
Over the weekend
patrons of the Sip N' Slip
got to witness what some
may consider the brawl of
the century. Doctors;
John Carter, Abby
Lockhart, and Doug Ross
were quietly enjoying some food and drinks
after a long shift at County General Hospital in
Chicago, IL. To the shock of everyone in the Sip
N' Slip, in walked three doctors from Grey
Sloan Memorial in Seattle over 2,000 miles
away. "You could feel the tension in the bar
grow thick" said Rita Levi, a patron at the Sip
N' Slip Saturday night. Alek Karev, Meredith
Grey, and Owen Hunt walked in and went
directly up to the table where the ER doctors
were sitting. An argument ensued between the
two groups which grew louder and louder. Eye
witness account tell us the argument was
about which hospital and which set of doctors
were obviously the better of the two. This
continued on for several minutes only growing
louder and more heated. The whole ordeal
came to a head when Alex Karev, known by
many for his hot temper, picked up a pool stick
and to everyone's surprise challenged John
Carter to a game of pool! He shouted "Winner
takes all" the bartender, Sam Malone told us.
The two groups of doctors headed to the pool
tables and started to play. Eyewitness
accounts tell us that they continued to play for
hours and hours, taking turns between the six
of them. "I think after an hour they all forget
what they were even
fighting about", Leslie
Knope told our reporter.
When asked what
happened all six doctors
declined to comment on
the event. Stay tuned!
By: Amanda Burnside
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ARE THE AVENGERS BREAKING UP??
We recently spotted
Billionaire Tony stark
fighting Thanos solo.
The battle took place
in Time Square
Tuesday night and
took several hours
ending with Thanos
teleporting to another dimension. No
casualties were reported, but millions of
dollars in structural damage resulted. After
seeing Iron Man fight solo, we can only
speculate that the Avengers have broken up.
This comes with the recent events of Thor’s
alcoholic relapse. There are several reports
that the God of Thunder has checked into a
New York Alcoholic Rehabilitation Center. He
has struggled with his alcoholic issues since the
death of his nemesis brother, Loki. When
asked about his relapse, Thor denied the
report claiming that he can control his liquor.
Also, we must not forget the recent reports of
the incredible Hulk’s battle with depression.
Earlier last month, we had a chance to asked
Bruce Banner about why he hadn’t
transformed in over a year and he stated, “I’m
finding my happy place”. With Iron Man being
the only healthy avenger, will he be able to
save us from Thanos? With rumors that Iron
Man has enlisted the help of other lesser
named heroes, like Spider-man and Ant-man,
it doesn’t raise the people’s confidence. But
there is hope on the horizon with President
Donald Trump’s recent visit to Wakanda going
well. We can only hope for a U.S and Wakanda
alliance. The Alliance would allow the Black
Panther to join our side against Thanos. We
need peace in the world and with the help of a
committed group of avengers, there’s hope of
accomplishing that.
By: Adan Vences.
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Madd Family Meanwhile, in Beverly Hills…

….and then there You’ll never

was light! The newest believe who just
celebrity couple was moved to Beverly
spotted in Brentwood, CA Hills! It looks like
leaving the house of Jay Mister Rogers
Pritchett and Gloria has a new
Delgado of The Modern neighborhood.
Family. Who is this Just next door to
delicious mixture of the Kardashians,
light/dark and crazy/fun he’s ready to
you might ask? None other than make Hollywood a kinder place. This
Wednesday Addams and Manny reporter witnessed Mister Rogers
Delgado. You would have to be living going over to offer Kylie some cookies
under a rock to not know who these – look out Jordyn! Looks like Kylie has
two are. Wednesday is the child of the a new BFF… and this one won’t sleep
unique, yet loving and supportive with her sister’s husband. After all, that
Gomez and Morticia Addams and wouldn’t be very neighborly. The
Manny with his chaotic extended Kardashians were even seen sporting
family of Jay, Mitchell, Cameron, Alex, some hand-knitted cardigans courtesy
Luke, Lily, Haley and Claire from the of Mister Roger's mother. Could
Modern Family. When TMZ reporters cardigans be
asked Morticia if they come out during the next
the day now and how she felt about her industry the
mini me blossoming out and possibly Kardashian
having a Gomez of her own in her in women
the near future, she responded with, dominate?
“Sic Gorgiamus Allos Subjectatos Only time
Nunc” (We Gladly Feast On Those Who will tell.
Would Subdue Us) as she laughed
Keeping you updated on all the latest,
walking to her hearse. I don’t know
about all of you but I am all in trying to Ashley Huston
see what is brewing. More details to
come!

By
Ambershay
Nezey