CLARITY IN

BUSINESS WRITING
GUIDE
Author: Mary Cullen, President
of Instructional Solutions
Mary Cullen has helped
thousands of professionals
master the critical skill of
business writing.

Her clients include Boeing,

DuPont, FedEx, Liberty
Mutual, and USAA.
Customized online and
onsite business writing
courses and coaching
enable employees to
convey complex ideas in
writing with clarity and
precision and impact.

Mary’s blog, Business

Writing Info, is trusted for
expert business writing
advice by 10,000 visitors
each month.
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 Table of Contents

The Power of Verbs............................... 3

Unsmother Verbs.................................. 4

Avoid Verb + Modifiers........................10

The Power of Short Words..................12

Clarity Exercises....................................16

About Instructional Solutions..............22

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Business Writing
Clarity Guide

The Power of Verbs

Verbs are the backbone of sentences. Honing

strong verbs is the single best strategy for
clear writing.

Focusing on strong verbs also naturally resolves

many other syntax problems, especially passive
voice used incorrectly and clause sequencing
errors.
 

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 Clarity Tip #1
Unsmother Verbs
What is a Smothered Verb?
• Smothered verbs are action words that are
buried in a group of other words.

• Eliminating the other words creates a clearer,

more forceful sentence.

• Smothering phrases often begin with a form of

be, give, have, make or take.

• The noun in the phrase often ends with -ion or

-ment.

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 Smothered Verb
Examples
• Be in agreement
• Give consideration to
• Have a suspicion
• Make an adjustment
• Extend an invitation
• Hold a discussion
• Make a decision

Look for the real verb in

these phrases.
Can you find it?

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 Unsmothered Verb
Examples
• Be in agreement = Agree
• Give consideration to = Consider
• Have a suspicion = Suspect
• Make an adjustment = Adjust
• Extend an invitation = Invite
• Hold a discussion = Discuss
• Make a decision = Decide

Use the real verb! Cut the

smothering fluff words.

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 Unsmothered Verb
Exercise
I am in possession of your report, and my team
held a discussion and gave much consideration to
your budget recommendations.

After much deliberation, I will give instructions to

my assistant to make an adjustment to your
account. You will see the increase in your budget’s
total account on the intranet by Friday, when you
can make a comparison between the two budget
figures. (64 words).

Try this:
Move clause by clause, and
unsmother every verb.
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 Unsmothered Verb
Exercise
I am in possession of your report, and my team
held a discussion and gave much consideration to
your budget recommendations.

After much deliberation, I will give instructions to

my assistant to make an adjustment to your
account. You will see the increase in your budget’s
total account on the intranet by Friday, when you
can make a comparison between the two budget
figures. (64 words).

Did you find all the

smothered verbs? Now find
the core verb.
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 Result: 26.6% Word
Reduction!
I have your report, and my team discussed and
considered your budget recommendations.

After much deliberation, I instructed my assistant

to adjust your account. You will see the increase in
your budget’s total account on the intranet by
Friday, when you can compare the two budget
figures. (47 words)

On average, unsmothering
verbs reduces bloat by 25%.
This is a powerful clarity
technique.
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 Clarity Tip #2:
Avoid Verb + Modifier
Construction
Choose powerful verbs that connote meaning,
which don't need a second modifying word to
do their job.

A verb that cannot stand on its own is wimpy.

For instance:

• "The attendant shouted loudly.”

• "The attendant shouted," is a perfect sentence.

The adverb "loudly" is inferred and extraneous.

• To emphasize the shouting, if necessary,

choose a more precise verb: “The attendant
screeched.”
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Avoid Verb + Modifier

Remember: A verb that cannot stand on its

own is wimpy. Choose a single strong,
evocative verb instead of a verb + modifier.

• "The executive ran quickly into the

boardroom.”

• "Ran quickly" is wasteful word choice. Pick a

better verb. "The executive sprinted into the
boardroom," is concise, visual, and lively.

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 Clarity Tip #3:
The Power of
Short Words
Many business writers feel they convey their
intelligence more by dropping long words, when
short words actually work better rhetorically.

Long words don’t make you sound intelligent

unless used very judiciously. In the wrong
situation they’ll have the opposite effect, making
you sound pretentious and even unsure.

They’re also less likely to be understood and more

awkward to read.

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 Clarity Tip #3:
The Power of
Short Words
I've always loved Hemingway's response when
Faulkner criticized him for his limited word choice: 

Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions

come from big words? He thinks I don’t know the
ten-dollar words. I know them all right. But there
are older and simpler and better words, and
those are the ones I use.

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 The Power of
Short Words
Richard Lederer sings the praises of the short
word to enhance clarity in his book, The Miracle of
Language:

Here is a sound rule: Use small, old words where

you can. If a long word says just what you want
to say, do not fear to use it. But know that our
tongue is rich in crisp, brisk, swift, short words.
Make them the spine and the heart of what you
speak and write. Short words are like fast friends.
They will not let you down.

Notice that Lederer’s clear and confident

recommendation is constructed entirely with
single-syllable words.

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Choose Short Words
Can be improved:

It has never been a good writing practice to

use big words indiscriminately.

Better:

It has never been a good writing practice to

use big words needlessly. ("Needlessly" is
shorter and simpler than "indiscriminately.")

Best:

It has never been a good writing practice to

bloat with big words. (More powerful verb
"bloat" instead of vague verb "use" eliminates
the need for modifying adverb "needlessly.")

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 Exercises:
How to Hone Clarity
in Your Own
Business Writing

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 How to Hone Clarity
Blaise Pascal beautifully expressed the value
and challenge of clear writing:

“I’m sorry for the length of this letter. I did not

have time to make it shorter.”

It takes skill and focus to write with clarity. It’s

much easier to bloat writing with unnecessary
words than to write with precision.

Thankfully, there is an exercise to hone clarity in

your writing. And, it only takes 10 minutes, 3 times
a week. After 3 weeks of this exercise, you will
have developed the habit of writing clearly.

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Week 1 Exercises
2-3 times this week:

Print out 2-3 emails you wrote last week.

Comb every sentence and clause and circle
every verb.

1. Unsmother any verbs that are

smothered.

2. Change any verb + modifier

constructions (Denah slowly walked to
the meeting.)

Remove any wimpy verbs (walked) that

need a modifier (slowly) to convey
meaning. Substitute a single strong
verb that evokes correct meaning
(Denah strolled to the meeting.)

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 Week 2 Exercises
2-3 times this week repeat the exercise:

The goal is to make crisp verbs your habit.

This takes practice:

• Print out 2-3 emails you wrote this week.

• Unsmother your verbs and choose a

single evocative verb, instead of a generic
verb that needs a modifier. (Most likely,
there will be fewer instances, since your
awareness is heightened.)

Tip: Are you having trouble finding

smothered verbs in your documents? Use
your word processor’s find function and
search for be, give, have, make, or take. If
these words are near a verb, the verb is
likely smothered.

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 Week 3 Exercises
2-3 times this week repeat the exercise:

Continue this verb honing exercise, 2-3

times each week, for just 10 minutes each
session, until clarity is crisp in your business
writing.

There is no shortcut here. Honing verbs by

following this practice will always bring
beautiful clarity to your writing, but it does
take a few weeks of focus as you retrain
your habit.

As business writers, we read so much

bloated writing that it can sound correct to
our ears. It isn’t. Stay with this exercise,
week by week, and your business writing
will become clear, lively, and interesting.

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 With focused
exercise, your
clarity will now
shine!

Ready to master
business writing?
!!

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 About
Instructional Solutions
Our company is based on a core belief: clear
business writing is a huge competitive
advantage. It is the currency that convey’s a
company’s products and knowledge, and the
primary connection to customers.

Business writing brings great value to those

who are good at it. Our goal is to help our
clients be the best at it.

For 15 years, we’ve helped hundreds of top

corporations and thousands of individuals
harness business writing to communicate
strategic value and essential information to
clients and colleagues.

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How We Improve
Business Writing

1. Online business writing

courses for individuals and
groups

2. Onsite business writing

courses for groups

3. Executive business writing

coaching for individuals

Creatively customized to match

client needs.

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 Contact Us
We’re Here to Help

Site: www.instructionalsolutions.com

Email: info@instructionalsolutions.com

Phone: (609) 683-8100

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