Chapter 5

Completing Business Messages

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 Learning Outcomes

 Evaluating drafts

 Improving readability

 Improving clarity and conciseness

 Using software tools for revision

 Using principles of design for readability

 Proofreading

 Distributing your message

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 Tips for Success

“Revision can be daunting, but it doesn’t have to be: it’s simply

reading your own work with a critical eye, and it’s necessary if
you want to write well. The art of writing is really the art of
revision.”
— Leo Babauta,
Author and blogger

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Evaluating Content, Organization, Tone
Content
- Accurate, relevant, complete

Organization
- Logical and convincing order
- Important ideas get space, emphasis
- Unnecessary repetition
- Logical grouping of details

Tone
- Balance between casual and formal: professional

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 Editing the Work of Others

 Focus on making the piece more effective, not more like

something you would have written

 Understand the writer’s intent before suggesting changes

- Purpose
- Target audience
- Information needs of audience

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Editing the Work of Others (cont’d)

Evaluate for the following:

√ Organization
√ “You” attitude
√ Correct tone for audience
√ Readability
√ Clarity
√ Design for intended message

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 Revising to Improve Readability

 Vary your sentence length

 Use shorter paragraphs

 Replace discussion with lists and bullet points

 Add effective headings and subheadings

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 Clarity
 Break up long sentences
 Rewrite hedging sentence
 Impose parallelism
 Correct dangling modifiers
 Reword long noun sequences
 Clarify sentence structure
 Clarify awkward references
 Moderate excessive enthusiasm

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 Editing for Conciseness

 Delete unnecessary words and phrases

 Replace long words and phrases

 Eliminate redundancies

 Recast “It is/There are” sentences

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 Using Technology to Revise

 Revision tracking and commenting

 Spell checker: Use it, but it’s not a substitute for your
own review

 Grammar checker: Has limited ability to identify mistakes

 Thesaurus: Not all suggestions are appropriate for your

situation

 Style checker: Can suggest word alternatives and

promote consistency

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 Designing for Readability

 Consistency  White space

 Balance  Margins and justification
 Restraint  Typefaces
 Detail  Type styles and size

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Designing Multimedia Documents

 Creative and technical skills

 Tools

 Time and cost

 Content

 Message structure

 Compatibility

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 Producing Messages

 Templates, themes, style sheets

 Page setup
 Column formatting
 Paragraph formatting
 Numbered and bulleted lists
 Tables
 Images, text boxes, objects

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 Proofreading Your Message

 Make multiple passes

 Use perceptual tricks
 Focus on high-priority items
 Distance yourself
 Be focused and vigilant
 Take your time
 Ensure nothing is missing and nothing extraneous is
included

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Distributing Your Message

• Cost
• Convenience
Distribution
• Time Method
• Security and
Privacy

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 Key Ideas from This Chapter

 When editing another writer, your job is to help

her/him succeed
 When editing for clarity, ensure every sentence conveys
your intended message
 Focus on how words and sentence contribute to effective,
coherent communication
 You are responsible for the final document
 You don’t need special training to create effective
documents
 You should become familiar with your basic formatting

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