ENT Factor Wiener Joe McElderry on music and makeovers WHY AMERICA’S GAY TEENS NEED TO KNOW LIFE GETS BETTEREXCLUSIVE X Factor winner Joe McEl ‘on music an UGLY BETTY VANESSA AND MICHAEL URIEONLIFE Somes ae ie Ss y Why buy Digital magazines? v Dynamic Content. State-of-the-art page turning technology, with page sliding and quick find functionality. v Value For Money. Cheaper to buy than the printed version in the shops. v Fast Delivery. No need to sean the shops and shelves to see where the newsagents have put your favourite magazine this month! v Socially responsible. No carbon, no trees, no fuels or chemicals were used in the creation of this digital magazineGT magazine is now available for iPad & iPhone Gay Times can be downloaded to your device easily as a subscription, single issues or back issues. For more details visit GAytiMES.CO.UK and click on GT iPad or search for Gay Times on the App Store. WW MagazineCloner msTHE GT FACTOR 87 ‘ ~s Ai First Features C © style a 12 itty atthe front 80 Sweetie, darling? 7 Eegontiale Q Ben Cohen Topless, Growl Another ex-Mods employee, Handme my leather ¢ DL FS 16 vanessa Williams Michael Urie, pops by GT Towers 88 London Fashion Week netamesti imeoe Lots andes of ver pleasant Siitrick orks Wo say hello tothe Ohmpics Clothes. (Andan interview) Lf sporting chap 42 Belesor Slotere 5 sereen 46 Joe WeEWdery Neighbours (nt tray interview. Whatever The Irepressibles. We're not 0 World AIDS Day worthy Sixnomal otng 4s ~ one proving that you never can DWC Sis Bachan has a right old gossip with GT How one man was cursed with dry cumming Travel 59 RGete Better 112 Canada What exactly f gong on with ‘Shout you se a bea our teenage gay brothers across screams head off n Vaushal” the pond? 116 Bruseette The pace to go for he best chips Regulars 21 Seott ts Hes abusy chap. Wiha website 20 Manhunt The pes of onine dating re aly wanted to wite "Penelope Pitstop" there) oo Fit Wank yourse heat. Speaking cof which, topless Gavin Henson Last 104Mr Sock A sock that answers yout problems {68Gay hall of fame Absolutely Fabulous, we salute (and stil quote) you yoContess Yean.Oh Yeah. Yeah. Do you want to break Up? ml ayes 0 uka BOLD... UNIQUE... FASHIONABLE... GLAMOROUS LIKE YOU ol MUR ce) eeINBOX ‘As World AIDS Day approaches, I've been wracking my brains for something new to write about HIV. While there is “news” ‘and developments every day, there is no dramatic breakthrough to report, no new message to trumpet. Of course, that makes it more important that we discuss the virus, that we think about it and that ‘each one of us commits ourselves to being part of the fight against it. In the 80s we all hoped for a silver bullet, a complete cure. We now realise that fight- Ing the virus in the human body is mas- sively complex and tackling the prejudice, stigma, confusion and misunderstanding that fuels It in soclety Is no more simple ‘What we do all know ~ you, me and the real ‘experts —is that each one of us can be HIV's ‘worst enemy or best friend, In this issue we preview GMFA's new campaign which asks all of us to make a few basic commitments; to test regularly to stay informed, to refute prejudice and stereotyping and to protect ‘ourselves. It's an approach that could make ‘a dramatic difference to fighting the spread of the virus. ‘Also in this issue we asked some positive ‘and negative guys to flash us some flesh and talk about HIV in thelr lives. Working with THT we wanted to highlight that positive people could lead otherwise healthy, full lives and that you couldn't tell someone’s status just by looking at them. Itwas no surprise that the issues they ralse In our short interviews are closely reflected in the GMFA strategy. We hope that their comments get us all talking and thinking In this month leading up to WAD ‘on 1 December. also hope you enjoy the rest of this December issue, from our interview with the charming and sexy Shayne Ward to our ‘workout which will help you get biceps just like his and all the rest. m Teery Gee has surgins pop degree mart tran simaditely 04 by Sexand pon thetact he asthe and 595 DvDeolctonct a immarealy.” Wl bvousy! EDITOR Scott aeyan a ceurery boy wh eevee igh eared Demag tate Onn scorT Sigs Ronen Eee LEE NAAT mpg) sytimes co.ukSubscribe and never miss Get 13 issues for only Only £3 a copy Delivery is free and discreet and your copy will arrive before it’s in the shops To subscribe visit www.gaytimes.co.uk/subscribe and quote GT387, call our subscriptions hotline on 0844 856 0637 or simply fill in the form below [1 YES | would tke to: .omecr cee DIRECT mpg)“ ° Cq BEES SOAR Con to So ao ec ae ee oa Lc ree ee ca LaOut inside Ive just read the article in Novem- bar's iesue, trom Simon Eddisbury’s book about being gay in prison, ‘Some wil say that the article dos not convey the atmosphere of prison, butitis an extract of a much larger book, which | am eure gives @ fuller picture. Gays do have to tread carefully inmost prisons, but! can ‘say that here in Whatton a pro-2c- tive attitude against homopho- bia is underway. Ive run a group called Real Voices” for gay or bisexual inmates which is well supported and at tended ('m not saying that Just because I'm the secretary) and we try to meet twice a month wher staffing levels allow. There ae sila tow problems now and again though, mostly rom the ‘group we call“plastic gangsters" in prison. The prison population is a ‘rose section of males in society, and Its my opinion that most, I not all men, have abi-cuious sce to them, | idnt become active unt | was in my 40s and was amazed at the number of men who use tolls, ‘woods, carparks ete for sexual ‘contact. By far the majority are what would be termed normal men, heterosexual and often married, but who need intmacy wth other men, ‘The same applies prison, andin | any gtoup of men, such asthe armed forces. You would be surprised, (or | then again maybe you wouldnt) at the number of men in prison who hide their sexuality and amongst them ‘are some who are the most openly verbally homophobic, that's usually a {good clue asto theirtrueteslings. | WW Taylor, Nottinghamshire ero f the month ecr We didn’t realise Inthe November issue of GT! believe have spotted a typo inthe Heather Small article, One of Heath- ers answers reads "What people don release is that for my entre career Ive had dentures” Surely it should have read "What people don't realise is that for my entire career, I've had dentures: Heather Small then clearly points cut that's a joke, ls the speting ‘error ajoke also or a poor job by your proof reader? Maurice Patrick Crossley, Aberdeenshire Editor repios: We are sorry for the error We're wanted Can | just say, you guys never {all to impress when itcomes to ‘making sure | get my pretty boy fix. Those Wanted boys ae FIT. It anyone wants to pass my details onto Nathan I could most definitely ‘make space for him in my if (even it's just for one night). And | promise not to post any pictures on Twitter tke that git a! Peter, via email X marks the spat Is Jos McElderry being sabo- taged? Last Saturday night onthe Ewitter GayTimestiag: Just HetttkerUK: Ara Golden Gaytine: ‘Shere ie xy ana ‘On gaytimes.co.uk forums... resargaraver ‘stocking BEC arte 93) menare unable of HV ana ype expesance at staal ison tbe dso550 Anonymous: have Maypoitstertho agente eee fromtanighest thateven noun rected group, bat re. you thoughts? done out omer disses hasnatieg Anonymeue Sragntandgay Isatowedto gine up people Petal roa soyearcs equality sytimes co.uka.) comedy gold vl get closer hmvcomX Factor something happened lings" that rose my venom, i wich set the alam bls fn Watsons ace, we secher | my head concerning Joe. Two row protaim gay babiesfhiron aise were glen songs to perom es ho ults new accoe which werein dre compet sory who pleases mummy and fen with Joes new single forthe daddy nis perfect mannerisms, number one spe and betheongs _leatiness and abitytobe "ine | Were ahead cfhininthechrts at macuistely behaved ever dnner the pot of common. a tocande Locate” irae simply nenplcable. What She eels his egument nthe tte ne chances hettwo songs tc that now prensa ovng chosento be perfomed ould be uncondtonally and toaly open head ofoeinthechar? The and accepting. remining ‘heme frthe week was music Shane na similar letter the very heroes. Duck Soupand Bun fat is empty. fabulously mane Ners, |sk you. the bgger pont need behaviours totaly even by wasnt so seis f would be very condtionl and nen-aaing | laughable. parenting that wi lad to avery Tet nore are altel sutsinthe depressed cha ie oro Ans business who have young gay Dectan Hayden, via emai | sted eevee ts nee ass onthe books tat hey wl oncnscrte ct pbc rot want folowing Joe's example. bin(eeepage 166) year ast spend Joe has to fail sothat they can turn Wouldntit be just peachy f, inthe cout na most of Chistes aroundtothem and say"you cont very las episode ofthe TV seis, craotaitme Saar -want to end up like Joe McEiderry. ‘Merlin, that handsome hunk Prince finbow on But TE Haskin 0 you? Ana Pendragon, hte i eeoae. Anne, via email ‘throne, announces to all the people James C That's quite a or Camatt that ne wit mayen : otoepcunze nen Chnstnas Eve? Andthat hs bnieto | cot cei Ceaeeeal Anaricleinthe Sle magazine __bewilbenone ther han his pretty Sent peer Cte Sunday Ties (17 Oe) manera rin. Wey we, | fern twit Meyer ‘dew meto eral you. itis Shane weal beleveinfarytales dont we? ee ea Wisonsarileon-itieGayDar Michel Russel, Winchestor mt Sahevtete, gt? het oy x ‘The Editor, GT, Spectrum House, Unit M, 32-34 Gordon House Rd, London, NWS 1LP. 020 7424 7401 edit@gaytimes.co.uk gaylimes.co.uk/interact tacebook.com/gaytimes. ‘witter.com/gaytimesmag Crea tuk eis te tune be Dornan Rep’ runbet ane osingrum casa neh, b8 (900 wards ot es) and cater wl be edi fr lng, Namal adie an be wit upon reve. Next month’s issue: Out 1 December The Naked Issue ee eee ee eer een Eee Coton ee ere net areas 10 sytimes co.ukar iis a MISSED AN ISSUE?st what you want welcoming you, whether it be at the start, of a magazine or (preferably) at home ~ Ben Cohen in not very many clothes. Well now you can, every day. Not that we're being stalkerieh or anything, he's done one of those calen- dare where In some months hopefully the warmer ones — he's letting his ur ly nthe wind, ‘And i you want to meet the man Inthe flesh hell be signing the calendar in the London Prowier store (prowler.co.uk) on 20 November at pm, at ‘aytines.co ukWe either overlooked The Kixx in our boyband round-up a few issues ago or they're SO NOW that we're practically lining up to a future cover. Or at least trying to get them naked. They're four 19-year-olds from Reading - Dave, Robbie, David and Jack to be precise - and the chances are you’ve maybe not seen them “in action” yet given that they've just finished a tour of, err, schools. Still, if it’s good enough for screaming adolescent girls... Ever wantoto tak one of Sipping gt renes ot Sewcinae » ‘Whetever you make the ~ oc tetlcan ‘them on God, week days are rubbish. What are you supposed to do when the X Factor isn't on? I don't know about you, but I'm whipping iy hair back and forth. Who do you think you are, Willow Smith? You're not exactly first inline for the Wil-Smith's-daughter-lookalike- contest. Or passing for a gil who is nine years old, Even if you make that dog years, *Starts whipping hair* La la la! Fine, if you're not going to listen to me, Il just sit here and entertain myself with a Muppet mash up on YouTube... “slows down whipping™ Didn't they do lewd things with Katy Perry? If they havent it’s only @ matter of time. As is a shouty out of tune cover by the gurning Cher Lloyd on X Factor. Oh my god, we're another five minutes closer to the next Live Final. Where's my weave? sayties.coukice to meat you NFIRST secr She’s been the voice of Belle from Beauty and the Beast since the beginning and now she paints for Disney — but how much of a princess is Paige O’Hara? Dieney princesses follow thelr hearts and not thelr heads, gving up their voice to get a man, ell ing their sou tothe dvi to save aman, and Belle fling for an tlghtfoot monster. Do you tnd to follow your head or your heart Inte? Oh, that's a hard one. | tend to follow my heart, just Because I'm ‘a sole whan it comes to my family ‘and my friends —to the point where ‘my husband Michael isthe opposite and he says "Ok, Paige, you can't ive up your whole ie to take care of your family 5/5 ses ustke Bale SHRIEK It you had to choose between the muscled, good-looking and primeval Gaston or the Beast who ‘would you choose? Oh, the Beast! He's so charming and wonderful ang has a beautiful soul You only know that now. (Laughs) | ‘mean Gaston maybe for a nigh 5/5 Tats what we want hes Do you ever catch yourself singing around the house and Ifo are they from Beauty and the Beast? Of course. Absolutely Beauty and the Beast not so much Human Again sometimes. | sing a lot of Judy because Im worklng on ‘a musical based on the life of Judy Gatland right now. i's been in the process fortwo years and i's actu ally petty dan good. 'm hoping | ccan bing something special tot. It's for Broadway; t's called Judy ‘The Musical. | grew up idolising her, and ve done tributes to her in my act for years Do you believe in true love and “happily ever after”? Yes, Id. Lrealy do. We have our troubles ‘and our fights, but Ive been wth Michael now for 22 years. | ad a horrible marriage before Michael and that made me pretty cyni calfor a while, but wth Michast | wasn looking. | was ata friend's partment and we were singing cover a piano to Kurt Weill~ One “Touch of Venus and ironically i was my ex husband that hired him [Wichael. So, that was the best thing my ex husband ever di. 5/5 Teal tepgy hock up and acoupict ‘wipes atthe x Love Het Have you ever wished upon a star as an adult? | did when I was Ite, when | loved the movie Pinoc ‘’hio. I would dream of being inthe theatre, and why not? It you could wish upen a star now, what would you wish for? Do you sill do thar? Maybe | shoul ‘get back to that. You know what, | do need to get back to that 115 vouras wistingona’ Your father hae decided to Invent something and name it fter you, ‘what would you wish for it to be? (Pause) | can’t think of anything that would help world peace. My biggest agony is what's going on wth the warn Afghanistan and poverty and homelessness. | just wish there was some magic cure, 3/5 wore talng princoseos not boauty agearts Page What can a princess never be without? Her lipstick (aughs). Dar ling, she's gotta have her make-up, 45 Aimost is actunly apne wih a You've invited us to be your guest ata lavish dinner party, what ‘would you (or a talking candle stick) serve? | couldn't serve the {ood that | te. ma vegetarian and | eat very strange food. Id serve wat I'd think you would tke: multiple ‘courses of diferent meate, vageta- bles and sweets, and fantastic wine. But would defintely have a sido dish of my whole-wheat pasta 3/5 st pve uth boty uly {alkoy te end ot ne evening anyway. 30/40 \We dort actuaty care what she scored, we gotto TOUCH Bale Hom Beatty ar ‘he Beast Arem. whichis ot row a8 8 Diamond Eaton cn Disney Oeule Psy sytimes co.uk121doc.o.uk Getting treatment has never been so convenient At 12Adoc, there's no need to wait weeks for an appointment, or worry about the embarrassment of talking to your dactor face-to-face about personal health issues. (Our online doctors can diagnose your condition and prescribe genuine branded medication in complete confidence. Our pharmacy dispatches medication via overnight delivery so that you can start your treatment as soon as possible. We even offer same-day delivery within the M25 circular. 121doc offers treatments for: Impotence Obesity Genital herpes ‘Smoking cessation Male pattern baldness Premature ejaculation To treat a sensitive health problem or to find out more about 121doc's treatments, please log on to www.421doc.co.uk or call our Patient Services Team on 020 7186 0092. 121doc private healthcare ontneIt's fate ona Friday ight. Im lying on my bed surrounded by pages ofthis very edltion of GT when the phone rings, i's Wilhelmina Slater trom rival publication Mode, Exceptit's obviously not Wil. helena, given that | have to reluc- tantly agree that she's afctional character from Usly Betty (We Will Not Forget, but rather the actress behind our inspiration, Vanessa Wiliams. And hey, how many other ‘gays getto reply to that creariest cof questions “what did you do last right” with "you know. the usual, chatted to Vanessa Wiliams” loan deny that we hounded her - we even got Michael Urie to forward what was basically an ‘email declaring our love to her. ‘What can we say? We learned all our tactics from Mode, And here we are — she's on her way to Memphis to film the US version of ‘Who Do You Think You Are, taking ‘break from the show she's just Joined, our other favourite gay-but- ot-actually-gay show Desperate Housewives. She's playing Renee Perry, former college frend of Lynette Scavo. And we've heard she's abit ofa vixen. "You could say she’s Wilhelmina te," Vanessa chuckles. “She's not {85 devious, not as fashion forward and certainly not as diabolical. But she tries to bring her New York style to Wisteria Lane and she gets Imo abit of rouble, but i's not at a level | was used to on Ugly Betty, It's allon a very suburban level” she laughs again, ‘She thinks for a moment when asked it Renee is as fun to play as the Meade's arch-nemesis, W's completly diferent. Wihelmi na was such a joy, The cast was Incredible, my surroundings were Impeccable, my wardrobe was be- yond creative and up-to-date, having Pat Fields atthe helm. | was realy working in an alternate universe With that character. This is as much ‘a dose of realty as | could possibly get, even though Renee is someone who has money and doesn't realy, saytines.couk Work hard at much of anything,” she chuckles once mare, “I's completely aitferent and 'm enjoying myself on Wisteria Lane” | ask if shes stil surprised at Ugly Batty being cancelled "Oh yeah, we all are. But the Person that made that decision is. no longer at the network so just was an unfortunate time for us as fa show. | know that we were not ready, we had many stories to tll | knew we ware nat clase ta the fond by any means. That was a decision that we're al still scratch- ing our heads over, We miss each ‘other terribly, we talk to each other allthe time. We text each other, Michael [Ure] and I, Beck [New- ton] we were at her baby shower @ couple of weeks ago, she's due in 1 couple of weeks.” ‘She stats listing allthe cast and it {quickly becomes apparent that the network didn’ ust fnish an incred- ible show, they broke up a family The cast, tturns out, didn't even get to keep any mementos “No, the tragedy" she groans. “The network wouldn't lt us take anything, wardrobe or furniture, Which was really kind of heat: breaking because there were ‘a couple of leone pleces that | wanted for my house, especially ‘rom Wilhelmina’ fice and apart ment, which I couldn't get because the network wanted to sell them. | don't even know i they made mon- ey back. Leaving witha really bad taste after we were cancelled and we couldn't. We were wiling to pay for the things that we wanted 1 purchase and we were told no, so that was. ot great. We realy felt badly about that” Bt don't let that rule out the chances ofthe cast reuniting “Ive head nothing,” she admits We'd all ove o dot in a second, in ‘heartbeat. But I've heard nothing and they destroyed everything They ripped athe sets down, hich again was heartbreaking, | dont even know whether i's being stored anywhere, We had a great FIRST time while it lasted for four years. ‘She laughs when | ell her that, ridiculously, the show defines alot cof what we do, | ask what her most ridiculous moment on the show was. “Have you gotten tothe water fight vith Wihelmina and Claire yet? “That was the most ridiculous thing, being able to have a catfight in the water ft was the most un day that wa had together. twas hilarious, that’s insane” ‘Speaking of insane ~two off.the- ‘sale gay moments crop up during ‘our chat, Fitstly ~ she's appear Ing as a judge on season three ot FuPaul's Drag Race. “Iwas great, | got a chance to ‘mest all the contestants and see them prepare. And then, oh my god I've gat to say the two contestants ‘end up doing their ypsych-off to one cf my songs, so that was lovely, it was great” Secondly, she's just finished a Broadway run of Sondheim on Sond- heim, which, when she reveals she might gett perform in London, elicits ‘an audible gasp trom yours truly. “heard that they're actually about to star the same production that we {id over In London so | was tying to get over there fr atleast a six to eight week stint but | don't know whether they're going to hire Brits ori theyl allow us to come in of ‘ot. Butt can do that inbetween the hiatus on Housewives Id love to ‘come over tothe West End and do Sondheim, that'd be great.” ‘The GT campaign to get Vanessa to the West End starts now. With all this chat of how increaible Ualy Betty was (UK viewers will see the final episode air on 22 December) | askifit was strange being the new hhousewite on Wisteria Lane. “Well! actually end up getting into ‘a catfight with Eva Longoria in one of ‘our episodes coming up..” AMAZING. Vanessa laughs hard, “Exactly. So {quess I'm carrying on the theme! Desperate Hounewivs and Ualy Betty eon (Channel 4 Sundayshappened to nearly everything rightcatches up PST] and Kelly Rowland By the time you read this, | wil have tlown to Uganda for a BBC documentary 'm filming about how ‘gay people are persecuted there. At thetime of wring, |have never been 0 soared in my ite. It's easy to take for granted the liberty and freedom we have in this country, Yes, the fight for complete ‘equality must continue, but if we look around we can see just how far the gay movement has come. Here gay clubs exist, same-sex partners can have envi partner- Ships and have children, laws are being changed and challenged to protect gay people and uphold their equal rights, there are support ‘groups for gay youths, gay people in the media, ay pride marches. How lucky we are. In Uganda, not only ist legal to be gay. gay people can be killed fort. I we were the victim of homophobia here we could go tothe police. To do the same there you would end up in prison Eatler today | interviewed a man ssyimes 00k called John, he was driven out of Uganda and sought refuge in Por ‘smouth, His face was printed on the front of a newspaper, much inthe ‘same way a paedophile or murderer ‘would land on tabloid front pages here. He was named and shamed for being gay. He then became the viet of hate crimes, abuse, vio- lence, his family rejected him and, should he ever eetuin, he will most Cofinitaly be killed He advised ma, as a young white ‘gay man, not to go there, as matter of ite or death, He said the ‘natives wil balieve | am trying to “inflict the disease of homosexual ity on thom It makes you realise just how lucky we ave and how we must ‘continue touse our voices to fight for our brothers and sisters all over the world whe do not have the freedom we have. I've never really Involved myself in the gay rights movement before, but | think now ivetime | dia Wow, the last month has been jampacked with celebs ‘coming onto my Radio 1 show. My favourite has been Rihanna. When she enters the room you know immediately that you are Inthe presence of a worldwide megastar. She looks flawless, her features are so stiking she's lke a cartoon, particulary with hher new bright red hai (Wilma Flinstone, anyone?) She's great tolinterview, gives a great insight into that jet set, uber-glar, pop star testyle we all dream of. For ‘example, she told me about how Katy Perrys her best friend and, COLUMN for her ben night, a gang of them went o Vagas to partay. Who wouldn't want a night out in Vegas with those two? | also attended a playback party for her new album, Loud. Ive been to many ofthese before, but never cone where the arts is actually there, She was sat on a stage, ‘observing everybody in the room for their reactions ta each song. It's quite an awkward environment Imagine listening to one of your fa- ‘vourte artists, while theyre wateh- ing you listening. The new aloum is ‘maga. Listen out fora track called California King, t's @ power-pop ballad that is simply stunning and a career best sofa Tinie Tempah popped in. ma big fan, his aloum is biliant, Don't Gismiss this one as just another hit RnB wannabe, There are many ‘around but this guy is the real deal Out ofall of his contemporaries, he's the only one to have had a number one single AND album, and don't gee it asa fluke, He's a really rice guy to, fun tobe around. Kelly Rowland has been on my show again too. Bless her, she had ‘cold so came in with a snotty rose. But she's a survivor (ike the song says), she satin the studio pling tissues from one box and then aisposing oft into another bor, No tall of snot rags for Kelly, Despite this intricate tissue dispos- al arrangement, he's very down to earth and doesn't take herself too seriously, Could have done without her tickling me almost to death, but then she topped itoff by caling me “funny guy’. Hopetully, she meant itinagood way.FIRST We lke a challenge. So when Absolut told us to "make the present exceptional We asked “how?” Why, with their Absolut Limited Eeltion vodka of course, That bettie you've so frequently had a firm grip on has been ext into ‘8 work of art. This won't atop you trom partaking in the contents, obviously ~ artis to be enjoyed, no? mt Charitable feet Flashy socks often walk the fine line between style statement and foot faux pas. Fortunately, this collaboration between Giles Deacon and Happy Socks pulls them off, offering the sock obsessive a week's worth of wonder wear. Aminimum of 25% of sales will go to the Elton John Aids Foundation - the price tag isn’t exactly ‘stocking filler level, but the seven pairs come as a box set, and only 1,000 sets have been produced. = —a E apy Sec zor sytimes co.ukCalm down, calm down, Just pre- tend you're trading bananas.” ‘This one wasn't so much a WTF experience as a "What the fuck am I going to do?" experience, And while there may have been no physical danger involved in the undertaking of tis piece, it stil made me feel thoroughly nauseous (a i traction) In a sight change of pace | moseyed ‘on over to London's shiny Canary Wharf to ty out @ day in the feof @ Cty boy. Omit“a day in the ita of” from that sentence and Is have been lot happier, but hey, who am Ito look a git horse in the mouth “The experience came courtesy of Amplify Trading, a proprietary trading company that offers courses for people looking o get into trading 15a career. The company is based in an ultra-modern, eerily beautful building (you know the score, lots of metalic surfaces, giant flowers and floor to celing windows overlook ing water) in the capital’ financial district. | must say before I forget from the head hanchos right down tothe students, everybody | was in troduced to displayed a very human \warmtn ~ no frozen-faced robots or Michael Douglas in the 80s, money hungry, hyper-masculine types Sorry to disappoint. Anyway. | doubt itll come as a surprise to learn that 8 ahumble GT journalist | wasnt necessary well equipped to take on the challenge in question. | mean, thus far this job has bestowed on ime specialist knowledge on every ‘subject from Brent Corrigan’ naked body (he's quite short in the flesh you know) tothe gripping 80s drama TTenko, but when it comes to the world of trade, nada, But | assumed that was a given. | assumed I's be. ‘what's the word... mellycoddled canapés perhaps? Personalised business cards? Some tree money? | gasped in horror on leaming | was going to have to engage my brainto get through the day. We were given some sold training from the company’s co-founder Wiliam de Lucy, but every word he utered went in one ear and out ofthe other ‘on account of the fact that he was rather handsome and !m easily distracted, Betore knewit | was be- ing half dragged into a room full ot massive computers with sprawting, inexplicable graphs on them, to be: gin trading with the other students, | tiled to console myself withthe fee ‘sandwiches (stil no canapés), and made about three trips to the coffee machine before | even sat down in ‘an attempt to banish a esting I've nat had sinee | took my GCSEs. ‘You 208 kind of missed the memo that the whole thing was merely ‘simulation (du), Yes, that's right, have a good laugh at my expense why don’ you? I wae indeed under the deluded impression that | was ttading REAL ol, REAL money. Or, in my case, bananas. Ten minutes in, when I sawthe ook of calm on de Leys face ater already lost 10 ‘grand, | kind oftwigged it wasnt real, though that humilation only made me sicker And besides, eventuelly ‘Something clicked and | started to gett. Minute by minute, the sickness fell away to be replaced by something equally unheathy: ‘obsession. I became frantically ‘obsessed with the idea of clawing myself back into profit, of timing the buying and selling of my il (or bananas) just 50, in ight ofits ever fiuctuating value, as instructed to me by graphs and a chat room populated by other trading students ‘om all over the werld. Throughout the day, there was a lt of talk of how emotional an experience trad ing is, at which | snorted at first, but it true, So much so, many traders work closely with psychologists to maintain @ healthy frame of mind as itis such an intense protession. As much as 'é recommend the Ampliy “Trading courses to anyone looking to make themselves employable ‘enough to eam a tidy salary in the Cty, the process of losing and then ‘earning back £30,000 in one a noon proved a litle too stressful for rol. 'm sticking tothe day ob. saytines.coukAlso this month we'e giving away £200 worth of cloth- ing from indie clothing brane Aettex. You could soon find yourself sporting a sexy Aertex outfit perhaps a modaish polo te2 ora classic check shit, ail very This Is Englana '6. Just shave all your hair off for guaranteed results [ertex i known for its qualty and style and so wil the lucky winner of this months competition, who willno doubt become the eye candy allthe boys ae after. To be in with @ chance of winning, log onto gaytimes.co.uk. Closing date 20 December. ssyimes 00k FIRST We've teamed up with one of the UK's most luxurious hotels to offer one reader an exclu- sive winter weekend getaway ~a two night stay for two ina sea-facing, double or twin bed- ded room at Jersey's famous Radisson Blu Waterfront Ho- tel, plus breakfast and dinner on both days at the Waterfront Brasserie, as well as a free facial at the hotel's spa. Join- Ing forces with Radisson Blu Is leading low cost airline bmiba- by, who will provide two return flights to the island from either ‘Manchester or East Midlands Airport. Visit radissonblu.com/ hotel-jersey or bmibaby.com for more details. Date of stay and flights subject to avail- ability. Terms and conditions apply, travel must be taken by 31 March 2011. To be in for a chance of winning, log onto gaytimes.co.uk. Closing date 20 December. baby,auch ie) HIS GORGEOUS tetera PTT ay (ors CARL HESTER SHOWS US THE GLAMOUROUS WORLD OF DRESSAGEPt a having repre pies in the equestrian preparations for London As Hester the period beams of his ‘beaut old mil hous and an where he stan« “This is wher the leer C, They go around the arena, Cis Centre line. The letters have been used for hun Jor, nobody Ca informs v don't k e not quite au fait with the éressage routine and ever the (ont, Carl taks us through it. “The horse has thr aces, a walk, trot and a canter. I originated from ould turn quickly, spin to and didnt get stabbed to death by the been d s, dressage, much lke ice skating, is performed to popular music, appealing tothe mas His new fly on the wall TV show captures the wh with four weeks of Having not seen it neue of what to expect, though there atone about his lations. “There was reference toi (my sexuality in ita all” Cart of two years. exciting contimation of a“Sticly’ st with Kate Price, while we look fr cing hi ‘omfort of our own.COLUMN Tits) Se eee) SMUT 02 Oct Oh Gaydar, why do you attract such normal welL-adusted people? Everytime | go on there think, "Wow, gay people are co ‘warm, s0 supportive, with such @ ‘concern forthe health and well: ing of those around them” Clearly "nave never thought this. Mostly ust thin, “Delete your protle {you mental tit, ust Because you met the love of your life on here ‘seven years ago, don’ think thet will EVER HAPPEN AGAIN.” And then, five hours later, Ilog off. And ‘comfort at But today was special. Even by Gaydar's standards, | was tap ping away this afternoon, feeling ‘vaguely upbeat, chatting tothe ‘odd person, when a chat request ‘came up. He looked pretty hot, although without a face — but then who needs a head? So overrated and 50 accepted the invitation ‘and we stated taking, Wed only ‘exchanged a few lines when he ‘asked i do bareback. Now, there have been occasions where | send mcr people messages about thistling them to learn some self-respect. But today, I thought, why bother? 80 simply replied, "No, not for ‘me’ How Zen of me, thought. Be cause you know, you get what you put out there, Emit non-judgemen: tal vibes and the world won't judge you. That theory is, after today, officially nonsense. His reply? (And | stress, lam about to quote pre- cisely — verbatim — what he said) ‘$0, not only are you fucking uly, you're also fucking boring, Whaaaaaat? | stared atthe screen for afew moments, absor- ing the words in front of me and then started composing my reply ‘Oh you think Im ugly, do you? You ‘must be a supermodel given that you don't even have your face on your profile, And '™m so ugly that you want to put your cack up me ‘without a condom? Really? So, bareback sex, for you, is some kind of revenge on the facially aficted? I think not, But, you know, Itake your point about me being boring, ‘What could be more interesting than AIDS? Endangering your lite {and that ofthe person you're with 's, afterall ke, SO FUN. How ‘exciting! Look, were HIV-positive ‘now! Such an adrenaline rush having to take medication for the rest of our lives! The buzz! Oh and the side effects! The diarrhoea! ‘The mental heath problems! And ‘nothing quite compares, does it to sitting your family down and telling them you have a ifetheatening il ‘ese Iiterally cant wait. Youte so right, anyone who doesn't want that ‘must be the dullest person EVER! But didnt send any of that, Given that this person is actually dangerous | thought that perhaps sarcasm isnt the best tactic. Wouldn't, for example, tell someone waving a gun around in public: You're s0000 orginal. No one's fever done that betore” No. Instead, | came out o the chat box and sent him amessage saying: "There is nothing uglier than having bare- back sex. You are putting yourselt atrisk as wall as those around you, Please stop it" I then calmly went round to his house and stabbed him repeatedly. n my head) 06 Oct You'd think that after the ‘other day, I would have had my quota of numbskuls for the month, Apparently not. I went on a date tonight, which I had genuine high hopes for. A couple of days ago ‘weld had exceptionally good sex, the kind where you thnk, “I want to poke you every day forthe rest of mmylife” And when, ater sex, the kids on his estate stated banging ‘on the door, shouting, and one of them said “faggot I thought, “Wel, ifm going tobe homophobically murdered atleast when the police discover my body i wil be covered beautifully in semen So felt ike Weld shared a moment together, ‘coming through stronger as aunt. But that was before tonight's dinner Over the main course, the ‘subject of children came up. Out of nowhere he saidI don’ think gay people should be allowed to have children” My head exploded, But managed o ply: “Um, why?" To wich he sald, “Because then the children might grow up thinking being gay is normal." As | began to Pick the pieces of train and flesh up from the plate infront of me, he added casually, "And in any case, ‘gay people never have serious relationships anyway.” | don't think Ihave ever looked at someone with such dlsgust. We argued for awhile, I managed nat to shout, “insemalised homophobia’ repeatedly uni he ran tothe near ‘est therapist Instead, we finished the meal, and as | said goodbye he replied, "Vd realy like to see you again” | smiled, walked away and thought, “really like to meet ‘someone who dosen't hate himset, who has managed to transcend the ugliness of the world around us, who can evolve with me as a ‘couple inte something amazing beautiful, and magical But who, ‘above all, has a big cock. i sytimes co.ukBook your place online at www.gmfa.org.uk/national or call 020 7738 3712 (Lines slaty anne Saturday 06.11.2010 Saturday 13.11.2010 Saturday 20.11.2010, City ‘genes [tity ‘gency City ‘Age Birmingham THT Midlands & HGL Brighton THT South Leeds Yorkshire MESMAG London uF Bristol TAT West Manchester USF Plyouth Eddystone Tst Leoester Trade Newcastle MESNAG NE Liverpool Armistead Project Notingam Hol Sheffield cay Southampton HS (cons etna pestip th 7 _ < @ mesmac (=:Michael Urie, the actor behind Marc St James (a minion in Ugly Betty’s Meade Publishing empire) dropped by our own real life gay publishing house. He liked what he saw. And smelt. What's the best cure for a broken heart? Hmmm... Finding another person to love, | suppose... Time ‘The only cure fora broken heart is time. That's my answer IH you could be anywhere right now where would you be? Gay Times! | would be at Gay Times, doing this. imerview. Reeceeally? OF course. Drawing from the jar... whispers} orn bed Do you get chatted up alot? Yeah. | guess s0, Im also asked for crections Alot, have one of those faces, I itimportant to have beautiful things around you? Yes, | believe it Is, And lalso believe that colours In your homes and offices — ke you guys have this lovely orange and blue looks at our face] You dont ike it? Err. [think colours are really im: Pprtant, ike to have bright colours scr ‘around, | think it's stimulating, ‘What's your colour scheme at home? Wel, mines, | ve in the comer ofthe building s0 | have lots of win dows, which is really great. | think win dows are important too. The walls are brown, but have a green celling and ‘giant yellow surlower painted on my wal tat my dad did n New York have lots of windows and micrrs, which Is good because irefects the ight, IW you could have sex with yourself, would you? Yeah, | actually had @ ‘ream that | had sex with mysel one time, Itwas lke. Iwas awesome, Hot. Would you film it? Yeah but | ‘wouldnt show itto myselt Burial or cremation? Tough one. ‘That isa tough one. | think cremation. ‘What if you got it wrong? What it we do come back, and I need my body later? No, what if you weren’t actually dead and you're being cremated. That would be tertble. Did you see the A-Team? Theres this bit where Liam Neeson takes something that makes t seem lke he's dead, and then they stat to cremate him and he wakes up, lke Romeo and Julist, and he's ike "Uh! Gotta get out of here {Dips hand injar, picks of dity sweet) Ew, what is that? ‘That's Heather Small’ fault, don’t worry about it. Why is the sky blue? Isnt ita reflection of the water? No, technically the sky isn't always blue. Sometimes it's grey, sometimes it's just white, So the answer i. Because God has a colour scheme, Do you believe in sayties.couk“| actually had a God? mumbles eer ae) poop, but the natural ‘comically] Not sex with Tcl one baby smell. The smell especialy, ‘What's the best ‘tthe skin, that smell time. It was like... it RAbeeaiellenseing ‘smell in the world? was awesome” ‘Tube clip you've seen Honesty, this isnt the best smell, but the bathroom here smelis = ally nee. couldn’ believe it, \was like “oh how nice’ You're the only person who has ever sald that. Someone must've sven ita quick spritz before you Went in. On realy, did someone take ‘big douche before | went in? But was, like “Oh how nice!” Did it give you an Englieh accent?! [ropey mockney] "How lovely, What @ lovely smel. The best smell ~ babies smell prety good. Photow ‘Again, we've got to question your "es ites anewer there... Wel, not when hey saytines.couk this year? Marcel the shell with shoes on. Jenny Slate and her boyfriend, s0 amazing. She was on this HB0 show called Bored To Death ‘and | goto meet her at a New York Jets football game. I's iterally this tiny litle creature that's @ shell with shoes and eyes and the most ador- able itle voloe and... youve gt to watch it. I's s0 good, Has fame gone to your head? No, but there have been times when Ive gotten used to certain things... and then when it suddenly isn that way, there's this split second where Im “don't you know who lam?" Itdoesn't INTERVIEW, last, because most people don't know who | am. So, I'm not realy that fa ‘mous. mm way move famous here than in the United States, When was the last time you wore ‘someone else's clothes? Well, this shirt is someone else's. He gave it tome technically, & friend who gave me some clothes. And | wear Mare St James’ clothes alt. ‘Amazing. Did you get to sneak lots ‘of them off set? You know, some: times you borrow things and then shows get cancelled and you don't return them We'll take that as a yes then. What did you dream last night? | was actually ust trying to remember the ‘ream | had last night. | can't remem ber It wasn't the dream where | had ‘sex with myself I mean really we just fooled around, me and me,INTERNE W.INTERVIEW He’s the hottest X Factor export ever, and now he’s back album anew anew body and a new beard. Meet GT’s current Obsession, the absolutely stunning Shayne Ward “Get on your knees, Turn around so your back’ to me ‘Shayne Ward. Uttered this, To me. Yes he, oh perfect faced one, of X Factor winning fame. I's true, have iton tape. ‘And thanktully he didnt croon it at ime in is falsetto voice, (As much as Hove his falsetto voice) Oh na. He sid it with the gruff, serious tone his raw length of beard suggests, While Iying on his back, FACT. OK, fun over. A this point I must set the record straight | have not been seduced by Britain's answer to Justin Timberlake, except maybe in my imagination. The lish bom singer's in {act straight (duh) and has been with his long-term gitriend since betore winning the country’s biggest talent show back in 2005. Although the truth behind his and my flirting isnt wholly disappointing absolutely staggered a the sight of his lean, taut new body, | requested something of a personal training session with the handsome Mancu- nian, And to my ecstatic glee he was more than happy o oblige. That sald It's les personal training, more him working out as | watch intently (is back muscles are Immense) walle cccasionally offering myself up as @ prop. He bench-presses my entire 10 stone self as I make coy itl “woah” noises. i's true, | have it on tape. That's why he was lying on his back land demanded | drop to my knees, in case you were wondering. *Lfeel the best I've ever fe,” he tes ‘me warmly ang excitedly." enjoyed the taining betore but | was doing a g lu go to dance. But eet) D the back ed % a Tee tee rey Rone) deere Rete = Butit’s not the reason = you ‘ge A up” 4 M sayties.couk a llHe’s the pop star you want to take home to meet your parents and he’s only gone and made one of the best albums of the year. Darren Scott gets a bit motherly with X Factor winner Joe McElderry. “Typical, You wait months for an X Factor fty and then two come along ‘at once. Though that wouldn't be the word last year's winner Joe McElderry ‘would use to describe himea. In fac, he wouldn't describe himset at all Before we chat Im already aware that he's nt THAT kindof person. While he talks 10 to the dozen about his music and his X Factor experi- ‘ences =to the point of getting tongue- tied — he's clearly not gotten even remotely big-headed since becoming the sixth winner of Simon Cowell's Juggernaut singing contest. In fact the 19-year-old Is endear- ingly humble and ever so polite it just makes you want to hug him, That, from an interviewer that recoils at the thought of being tactile, is quite a statement, But his oy is adorably infectious, you cant help but be pleased for him, ‘The theme song forthe last scraps of ‘summer was undoubtedly his, with his top 10 single Ambitions taking Joe in ‘anew direction which he grabs with both hands on his debut album It's an album that wil surprise you. Wide Awake, which he worked ‘on wth producers Ray Hedges, Dallas Austin and John Shanks (google them, there's afar few big names they've worked with) has shades of Scissor Sister, Mika, ‘scr Pot Shop Boys and George Michael in there, Colour me shocked, as find myset excitedly teling Joe just how bri ‘Typically, he seems to not believe ime, "Do you lke it?" he checks, betore thanking me. Itell him t's @ pleasant surprise and he laughs. "Hopefully for everyone! You ~and possibly |~might have thought there'd be a collection of ballads headed our way, Not so, An album of upiting pop you say? | ask Joe ithe expected to be going down that particular path Nota all Im glad that we dia something lke that, | wanted to come out witha single and album and kind of ike, make ita bit ofa surprise. | wanted to do something that people weren't going to be ‘expecting and tresh and fun, Keep- Ing itas ask really, keeps things interesting,” he explains “I sald tothe label | want songs that | could go crazy with, you know lke, on stage I can have dancers, | ean da dance routines that | can get the crowd going. | wanted to do those type of songs, And they totally agreed so we went for it, and \we went to town with itand hope: fully pay of * He gracefully accepts comparisons to ther acts as a “huge compliment” ‘and points out that there's a George Michael sample on the album too, I's Fal Late Starter! want to discuss, vith the line "youll be kissing my ass Joe McElderty! What wil the fans think of his potty mouth! He bursts out laughing, "Well Im hardly swearing! I's not a swear word, 1m sure theyll get overt” he laughs again. "i's just abit of fun, that’s what | wanted todo, i's fun song.” From potty mouth to pouting mouth he got abit of modeling work under his belt inthe last year too. How does he feel about the makeover? “I haven't had a makeover!” he says incredulously. "Ive just kind of changed my har stye! | think people think that I've been put inthis machine and i's gone 'you will ook Ike tis. We did tis hairstyle on a 1 the album i, photoshoot, and | really kad itso | decided to keep itso that’s basically alltha’s happened” ‘Ah Joe, | suggest withthe tone ofa ‘gay Yoda — that's the press for you, declaring a makeover, comeback (Or inthe case of Joe, his first gay ‘experiences, “The night before our interview he id signing at G-A-Y bar in London (end then went out partying with The ‘Saturdays, as you do, hence some- thing of a hangover) and the press ‘were quick to say it was the fist ime hed been to a gay club, Or was that vet more rubbish? oe sighs, “No that's rubbish, I got ‘asked that the other day, Some- times | wonder wy | even do these interviews because everything | say is just reverted to another anwer ‘They asked us if Id been to one and | ‘sald yes I'd been to one but 'd never been to G-A-Y before. And then that ‘obviously go translated to ‘ve never been to one before | ask if that means he's been to Powerhouse in Neweastle, having had ‘some hazy nights out there myselt "Did you lke it? It's an experience...” he laughs. joke that I'm not one for Clube.“ preter ahouse party." he shrugs. So we can say's nonsense that he hasn't been to gay bars be- fore? “Yeah” ‘Does being famous mean he can really go out at all? t's a it more busier, going out, bit more crazier but yeah | can sil go ‘out. I dont lock myself away every nigh," he laughs, By the time you read this chan are you'l have seen Joe launch ‘album at the London elub (ang star rite of passage) Heaven itupon myseltto offer a bt friendly boy-to-boy advice ‘star to pop star, telling him t back rom the stage as Tom) IMeFly once told me “they pr ‘grab your balls" when you there, Joe roars with laughter ‘vows to remember. Sothen. The gay stuf Its2 that, unless you've been living ‘aock, youll already know. ShorINTERVIEW |INTERVIEW version: someone hacked his Twitter ‘account and announced that he was ay, He later said that this was what ‘macle him relies it was time to come fut, which he id in tabloi Whispers abound that it was oe himself thet posted the tweet he laughs of as “something | wouldn' do" Obviously im going to ask about coming out, but i's well known i's something he's said allhe has to say about. Let's face i, the boy wants people to like his music, yet ll ‘anyone asks him about is coming out ‘Ancther angle then —has he noticed his gay fanbase growing? “Etm.. I don’ know, | just found that everybody was really supportive you know I didnt ever think ‘oh god this fanbase ie growing naw’ you know? | just found everyone really ‘supportive, which | am realy, really appreciative about she then ready forthe attention it bring from magazines euch as ourselves? “Etm,.. dont know well see” In fact, did he even read gay magazines before? Yes, Im fishing to see it he's read GT. “Not relly mean um... You know... i's ust (stumbles) I didnt 90 ‘allright okay | came out now Imm going to start reading gay maga- zines" he laughs. “twas jst, you know, I'd ead itt found i iterest- ing but just havent really had the change to read one yet” ‘can tell he's slightly uneasy — he's not to know that being aware of how hes I'm not going to ask about boys. Hey, why would you trust a Journalist? Instead | consider how he copes with that line of question Ing given that people expect the personal lives ofthe famous to be public property. “Itgets annoying but |just con- centrate on the music and I try not to talk about my private ite ‘cos, you know, that is my privat fe. At the end ofthe day what | dois me job, andif I don't have a private ite then it’s pointless doing it, do you know what | mean? *S0 I don't talk about anything private, and when I get asked ‘these questions | just go ‘oh he trails off then laughs. *'s rather people speculated than me talking about everything, you know what | mean “If people want to make com- ments from me being private then that's fir enough but I rather that than have all my private ite splashed all over everywhere You know, Ican easly... tl spoke about everything then | could ‘easly spend my whole Iie in the ‘media spotlight, and I don't want todothat you know, | want to be able to go back to my friends and family, and just have @ party, and talk about things that | wouldnt necessarily tak about in the press, you know what mean?” ‘And why shouldn't you? | reply, sue- dnly protective again “Hove it, don't get us wrong | ove it, ‘ut Ido love my private lite as wel, Final | can‘ help but mention that ‘ur cover star, Shayne Ward, de- scribed Joe as lovely. Would he agree? “I dont really kind of tink about -myset ike that so I'm not going to answer that one!" he laughs. Sohe couldn't describe himsel then? “I couldn't describe mysett! You can describe myself. As long as it's nice’ | blurt out that m just going to use lovely again then, “That's fine!” he beams as | pluck Lup the courage to pass on something ‘alse Shayne said. That he would French kiss Joe. “He would what? Really? Oh well ‘ell him that | said thank you" Haugh and note that this quite a polite reaction “What would you like me to say?" he ‘asks cheeky before shouting in mock horror.“OH MY... GAWD! and then bursting out laughing ‘Ooh the scamp's played me at my ‘own game. | Joke that | wouldnt mind | Shayne Ward said that to me, Joe laughs again.“ send ‘im your way then!” a sayties.couk