Scambaiting 2015 2d Ed

Scambaiting for the Insane
Second Edition
By
Will Laquelle
© 2015 Will Laquelle. All rights reserved.
ISBN 978-1-312-02490-8
2
The Joys of Scambaiting
CHAPTER 1
Origins of my scambaiting
What is the difference between a hobby and simply wasting time?

I’m not sure where the line is, but I’m confident that “scambaiting”
falls far on the “wasting time” side. I like to write things that I
think are funny. Unfortunately, I’m far too lazy to put together a
novel, or even for that matter finish a short story. Rather than
come up with my own ideas, I prefer to let circumstances suggest
the idea to me, and let me respond to it.
There is no better source for ideas than spam. There’s a lot of
crazy stuff out there, and responding to it—well—it’s sort of like
playing chess with your dog. You can come off as very clever, but
your dog never knows just how thoroughly you beat him at chess.
Scammers are much like my dog, or like my dog would be if he
were on drugs that impaired his judgment and reasoning power.
True, there are some good scammers out there. By “good” I mean
people who can really set up a mark and steal quite a bit of money.
I am far too moral lazy to emulate those scammers. It is also true
that there are many very bad scammers out there. I had no idea just
how dumb some of these scammers could be until I started playing
with them.
In the olden days of yore, scammers had to be creative and talented.
There is a long and honored tradition of confidence men who
specialized in conning people out of their money. Now those
confidence men and women are still out there, but technology has
changed things. Con jobs are mass produced overseas and
imported, and the quality has suffered.
My particular timewasting actually started before the Internet. I
used to tease telemarketers. I would tell callers from photography
studios that I was a vampire, or really ugly. I would feign foreign
3
accents and pretend to misunderstand what they were trying to sell
and tell them long rambling stories about the old country.
Sometimes, if I was in the mood, I didn’t think of it as an
annoyance; I thought of it as free phone sex. I tried to recruit them
into my Amway circle. It was an enjoyable hobby, it saved some
anonymous other person from being solicited, and I only almost
got myself arrested once. I was sitting around on a Saturday
afternoon and someone from a credit card company called to offer
me a credit card. Yes, my credit rating was once that good. I
monkeyed with her for a few minutes, then I confessed:
“Look, I’m sorry,” I said. “I’m not him.”
“What?”
“The guy you called,” I continued, “I’m not him. I’m just here
robbing the house.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m a burglar. And look, you do need to give the guy a credit card.
He’s got nothing. He’s got an eight-track player from the Disco
era. I went through his drawers. I found forty-seven cents and
holey socks and underwear. This TV, it’s at least twenty years old,
not even worth carrying out of the house.”
She asks, “You’re robbing the house?”
“You’re catching on,” I explained.
“And you answered the phone?” she asked.
“Yes. I was hoping you were Roger. Roger’s supposed to pick me
up. I don’t know where the hell he is. Could you call him for me?”
She hung up. “Uh-oh,” I thought, “She’s calling the cops.” I had
overestimated the ethical standards of telemarketers. She obviously
didn’t call anyone. No cops came. In the mind of some
telemarketer, I guess her customer came up short forty-seven cents
and an eight-track player.
Another time I got a call from someone hawking magazines. My
sister-in-law was here. She understood and appreciated my hobby
of wasting telemarketers’ time. As I continued to explore the terms
of this wonderful deal for magazines, she was audibly anxious trying
to get my attention. “The contractions are coming faster,” she said.
4
The baby was coming. Her water broke. And I kept asking about
the wonderful deal the caller was offering me on magazines.
“Hold up honey,” I said, “This lady says we can subscribe to ten
magazines for a very low price—for a year!”
She got more and more desperate, and I continued to put her off
and inquire as to the prices and magazines available. Finally even
the telemarketer took pity and said, “You need to get that lady to
the hospital.”
“Okay,” I grudgingly said, “But call me back.”
So I applied the same principles to ridiculous spam from all over
the world.
So responding to scammers wasn’t my first experience in wasting
peoples’ time. Now, the telemarketing technology has improved.
Telemarketers start with a recording. You can’t waste a recording’s
time, and you can’t confuse a recording.
For about ten years I never seriously tried to get a response out of
scammers. I would write responses that were so silly and
implausible that there would not be a chance that even the dumbest
scammer could take me seriously. The responses were mostly
springboards for me to write silly emails.
With the advent of technology, economies of scale have automated
the more traditional scams and the availability of cheap labor has
forced these operations overseas. Quality, as you might imagine,
has plummeted.
Dr. Motaung
Dr. Motaung is a typical scammer. Below is Dr. Motaung’s

solicitation followed by my response.
In a message dated 2/22/2004 2:02:36 PM Pacific Standard Time,

drmotaung@... writes:
22/02/2004
5
Dear Friend,
I write to seek your cooperation as my foreign partner and your

assistance to enable us to own properties and invest in the stable
economy of your country. I apologize if this mail does not suit your
personal or business ethics.
My names are1 Dr. Andrew Motaung. We are making this venture

proposal to you in strict confidence. As senior civil servants in the
South Africa Government, the South African civil service laws
(Code of Conduct bureau) forbid us to own a foreign account. The
money we have in our possession is an overdue payment bill
totaling Twenty Six Million, Four Hundred and Twenty Six
Thousand US Dollars (US$26,426,000.00) which we want to
transfer abroad with the assistance and co-operation of a
company/or an individual to receive the said funds, via a reliable
Bank Account.
If you will like to assist us as a partner, then indicate your interest

after which we shall both discuss on the modalities. All other
information to facilitate the remittance of the funds will be revealed
to you in due course. For your assistance, you shall receive 30%
amounting to US$7,927,800.00 of the US$26.426Million, 60%
amounting to US$15,855,600 for us and 10% amounting to
US$2,642,600 will be used to settle taxation and other
miscellaneous expenses in the course of transferring the funds to
your account.
Please indicate your direct telephone and direct fax number when
replying this business proposal preferably through my alternative
address: anddmotaung@.... I will call you when necessary. If you are
1 This becomes important. You should also know that the “my names are”
structure is common among scammers for some reason. I’ve seen it dozens of
times.
6
not interested, please also indicate so that it will enable me to
contact other foreign partner with recommendations to carry out
this deal.
A swift acknowledgment on the receipt of this mail will be

appreciated.
Thank you and God bless you.
Best regards,
Dr. Andrew Motaung
I, I mean we, respond:
Dear Dr. Motaung and Dr. Motaung:
My names are Will and Melvin. I am sorry, but we cannot help you.
The unpaid bill you have is, unfortunately, Melvin's Mastercard bill.
He ran it up while trying to assist a foreign civil servant in South
Africa collect a debt. As you might imagine, we're upset. He's going
to have to write a check in a few days or they're going to add a forty
dollar late charge. This is the second time we've been cheated on
one of these multimillion dollar fund transfers from Africa and the
Middle East. When two of fourteen deals go sour, that's an
indication we should be real careful before we respond to these
emails. The last time we got cheated we had to send our private
mercenary army to "negotiate" for us. Now on this diamond deal
we're many millions of dollars in the hole and all we have to show
for it is six or seven semi truckloads of diamonds.
I am so tired of this I told Melvin just to tell them they can have the
damn diamonds if they would just send the twenty six and a half
million bucks back. I told Will he's crazy, because the diamonds are
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easily worth ten times that amount. I told Melvin of course I'm
crazy, you imbecile, we're schizophrenic! I told Will maybe we're
schizophrenic, but we shouldn't be so damn schizophrenic that
we'd sell two or three hundred million dollars’ worth of diamonds
for twenty six and a half million bucks.
I told Melvin this is probably some kind of scam, just like the
diamond deal. Sure, we've made multi-million dollar profits on
twelve fund transfer deals, but this is starting to get annoying. I
kicked Will right square in the balls, which is not easy when you're
really a schizophrenic in one body. Try kicking yourself in the nuts
sometime.
So we compromised, which is not as easy as you would think it

would be for a couple of guys who are really just one schizophrenic.
If you'll send us one hundred million dollars ($100,000,000.00) you
can have the diamonds. Sorry, no checks, Melvin wants it in nickles,
dimes, and quarters.
So we, Will and Melvin, ask you to please respond promptly.
Will Melvin
Dr. Motaung wasn’t interested in dealing with us further.
Chibuzo
I enjoy getting into text conversations with scammers and

promoters of dirty websites from time to time. I know I’m
probably just wasting a spambot’s time, but every once in a while it
becomes obvious I’m wasting a real person’s time, as in my
exchange with Chibuzo.
8
The exchange with Chibuzo started out as a response to an
advance-fee fraud scam. An advance fee fraud scam is any scam in
which the scammer tries to entice the victim to forward some
money to the scammer in hopes of a huge reward later. These
scams existed long before the Internet.
The Chibuzo incident began as a response I did entirely for fun. I

did not expect Chibuzo to take me seriously. I had underestimated
the intelligence of this particular Internet scammer. As you can see
from my original response to his letter, I wrote this response for my
friends, not with any intent of actually catching a scammer.
Dear Chibuzo:
My responses are as follows. I'll write in all caps so you can keep it
straight who wrote what.
chibuzo njamar wrote:
FROM MR CHIBUZO NJAMA

TEL NO ++2289247919
LOME-TOGO.WEST AFRICA
ATTENTION:DEAR LAQUELLE,
I am contacting you believing you are a honest and trustworthy

person.
YOU HAVE NO BASIS FOR SUCH A BELIEF. IN FACT, I
WAS IN CHARGE OF DIRTY TRICKS FOR THE NIXON
ADMINISTRATION.
I believe you will not betray the confidence I have in you to have
contacted you even though we've not met before.
9
WE MET IN A BAR IN ANGOLA ONCE WHEN I WAS
MOONLIGHTING AS AN ARMS MERCHANT, CHIBUZO.
DON'T YOU REMEMBER? WELL, YOU WERE RATHER
SMASHED, WEREN'T YOU? ANYWAY, YOU SHOULD
KNOW THAT I'LL BETRAY YOUR CONFIDENCE JUST
LIKE I DID LAST TIME WHEN I TURNED YOU IN TO THE
KGB. WASN'T THAT FUN?
Besides,I only got your address through the internet.

THAT IS IMPOSSIBLE SINCE I DO NOT HAVE AN
INTERNET ADDRESS. I DIED BEFORE THE INTERNET
WAS INVENTED.
I am MR CHIBUZO NJAMA. Pam Head of Banking Operations,

Western Banking Operations,Union togolaise Bank of lome-togo
U.T.B . There is a dormant account which has not been operational
for over a decade now.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I HAVE SEVERAL EMAILS FROM
OTHER PEOPLE WHO HAVE ALREADY TOLD ME THAT
THEY ARE HEAD OF WESTERN BANKING OPERATIONS,
UNION TOGOLAISE BANK OF LOME-TOGO U.T.B
The account has a net balance ofUS$28.9 million (TWENTY

EIGHT MILLION NINE HUNDRED DOLLARS)The owner of
this account was Engr. Laquelle B.
MY GREAT UNCLE BARNEY LEFT ABOUT 28 MILLION
DOLLARS IN TOGO LAST TIME HE WAS THERE, WHICH
WAS ABOUT TEN YEARS AGO. ANDREAS aBRITON IS
WRONG. UNCLE BARNEY ISN'T DECEASED. HE'S JUST
A SOUND SLEEPER.
Andreas, aBriton and manager of Petro-Technical Support Services.

On investigation I discovered that the account owner is deceased.
He died over Ten years ago. I also discovered that neither his
company nor anybody was named a beneficiary of the fund.
10
HE DID ACTUALLY NAME A BENEFICIARY. HE ASKED
ME TO TAKE CARE OF THE MONEY IF HE DIED. I
TOLD HIM TO FORGET IT. HE LEFT ME STUCK WITH
FIFTEEN MILLION DOLLARS WORTH OF DIAMONDS IN
SOUTH AFRICA ONCE, AND IT WAS A BIG PAIN IN THE
ASS TO GET RID OF IT.
If the money is not claimed and the bank discovers this lapse, the
money would be forfeited to the Federal Government but the
directors, in thier greedy fashion would siphon it to their individual
account.
I THINK YOUR ATTITUDE IS VERY UNFAIR. TOGOLESE
BANKERS AND PUBLIC SERVANTS WORK HARD FOR
PITIFULLY INADEQUATE SALARIES. IT'S ONLY RIGHT
THAT THEY SIPHON OFF MONEY THAT NOBODY'S
USING AND THAT'S JUST TAKING UP SPACE AND
GATHERING DUST IN THE CORNER OF THE BANK
VAULT.
All I want you to do is to collaborate with me by standing in as the

beneficiary because the Management is ready to approve the
remittance of the money to any foreigner who has correct
information of this account. Beside I would use my position to
facilitate prompt remittance of the fund. Send to me immediately
your bank information of any bank of your choice where you want
the money to be transferred.
PLEASE DON'T TRANSFER IT TO A BANK. PLEASE JUST
MAIL IT TO UNCLE BARNEY
UNCLE BARNEY LAQUELLE
9110 SOUTH FORNICATION AVENUE
BUGGERALL, ARKANSAS 72204
You may open a new account if you so wish.
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If for any reason you think you're incapable of this transaction, you
may recommend anybody whose integrity is not in doubt.
SORRY, I DON'T KNOW ANYONE WHOSE INTEGRITY IS
NOT IN DOUBT.
I shall however provide you with directives on what to do as we

proceed.
Contact me on my private telephone numbers above or through my

email address with information about your full contact addresses
including personal telephone & fax numbers and Bank information
immediately if you are interested.
Also, I need little information about yourself and what you do for
living as well as a strong assurance that you can guarantee the safety
of the money when it gets into your account .
AND I NEED A LITTLE INFORMATION FROM YOU AS
WELL. WHERE THE HELL IS TOGO? WHAT'S YOUR
TELEPHONE NUMBER? WHAT'S YOUR SOCIAL
SECURITY NUMBER? DO YOU PLAY A MUSICAL
INSTRUMENT? ARE YOU ANY GOOD? WAS IT YOUR
GRANDMOTHER WHO APPEARED AS A PLAYBOY
CENTERFOLD IN 1956? IF NOT DO YOU HAVE A NAKED
PICTURE OF HER FROM 1956 SO WE CAN MAKE SURE IT
WASN'T HER? WHAT IS YOUR BANK ACCOUNT
NUMBER, BANK, PERSONAL IDENTIFICATION NUMBER,
AND SECRET HANDSHAKE? WHICH DO YOU PREFER:
GINGER OR MARY ANN? JEANNIE OR SAMANTHA?
MORTICIA OR LILY? IS SODOMY REALLY AS MUCH FUN
AS IT'S CRACKED UP TO BE? BE SPECIFIC PLEASE.
At the conclusion of this business, I shall travel to your country for

sharing. I have mapped out 25% of the total amount for you for
assisting me, 5% to take care of all expenses from both party and
the remaining for me.
12
IF YOU COME HERE, DON'T DRINK THE WATER.
I look forward for prompt reply from you.
SORRY, YOUR EMAIL ACCOUNT HAS ALREADY BEEN

CUT OFF AS YOU ARE A SPAMMER.2
Warmest Regards.
CHIBUZO NJAMA.
Chibuzo’s email illustrates some of the tricks used by

advance-fee fraud scammers. One trick is to pretend to seek a
partner in some sort of a crime. That way, when the victim figures
out that he’s been tricked, he can’t go to the authorities. He would
only implicate himself.
The scammer sends out hundreds of thousands, perhaps

millions, of emails in the hopes of finding someone foolish enough
to fall for this scam. Most of the emails will never be seen.
Spamcatchers usually catch them and delete them. Of the few that
get through, only a handful of them will reach someone gullible
enough to bite.
My responses tend to be completely implausible. That

should be a clue to the scammer that he doesn’t have a good victim
on the hook, and that he should therefore devote his efforts
elsewhere.
One would think that my response to this guy would be

clear enough that he would know that I was not a likely victim and
2It’s not uncommon for spammers’ email addresses to be cut off. Fortunately
for the scambaiter industry, email addresses are easy to come by. In this case, it
was a wild guess that the scammer’s email address would be cut off. In this case, I
was wrong.
13
move on. I was wrong. A few days later a message appeared in the
instant messenger box from Chibuzo. I was intrigued.
chibuzom_2004exm2 (2:56:39 PM): hello

chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:04:33 PM): hello
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:05:00 PM): are u there?
WillLaquelle (3:18:28 PM): I am now.
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:43:50 PM): oh sorry i missed too
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:44:07 PM): how are u?
WillLaquelle (3:44:24 PM): Now I'm here
WillLaquelle (3:44:28 PM): What's going on?
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:45:39 PM): i wish to chat with u and late u
know whom i am
WillLaquelle (3:46:32 PM): Chat away, my good man!
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:46:59 PM): i got the mail u send to me but
i cant rely understand a little bite
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:47:24 PM): please late know ur stand
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:47:43 PM): i hope u got my mail?
WillLaquelle (3:48:17 PM): I did get your first mail. Is there
another.
WillLaquelle (3:48:20 PM): ?
WillLaquelle (3:48:32 PM): Sorry, I often forget to use question
marks?
WillLaquelle (3:49:03 PM): And then I get oversensitive and
overuse them!
WillLaquelle (3:49:23 PM): I love punctuation. How do you feel
about it?
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:50:07 PM): about ur mail?
WillLaquelle (3:50:31 PM): About my mail? What's the question?
WillLaquelle (3:51:33 PM): I did not get a second mail.
WillLaquelle (3:51:39 PM): Only a first one.
14
WillLaquelle (3:51:52 PM): To which I responded. Did you get my
response?
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:52:03 PM): please u have told that u will
betray me
WillLaquelle (3:52:13 PM): I will. I'm horribly unreliable.
WillLaquelle (3:52:18 PM): Don't you remember?
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:53:04 PM): yes i got your mail and i can see
that u cant help me out?
WillLaquelle (3:53:09 PM): You are Chibuzo Njama, aren't you.
WillLaquelle (3:53:11 PM): /
WillLaquelle (3:53:12 PM): ?
WillLaquelle (3:53:24 PM): About 50 (now)?
WillLaquelle (3:53:36 PM): six foot 8, 125 pounds?
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:53:40 PM): yes is me
WillLaquelle (3:53:42 PM): small scar under left eye?
WillLaquelle (3:53:54 PM): huge earring in right ear?
WillLaquelle (3:54:10 PM): Used to be an arms merchant in Angola
in the late 60's and early 70's?
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:54:19 PM): can u carry up this transaction
with me?
WillLaquelle (3:54:25 PM): Kidnapped by the KGB?
WillLaquelle (3:54:39 PM): Escaped from Moscow during the Boris
Yeltsin revolution?
WillLaquelle (3:54:51 PM): Walked across the polar ice cap to
Canada?
WillLaquelle (3:54:56 PM): That's you, isn't it?
WillLaquelle (3:55:01 PM): How many could there be?
WillLaquelle (3:56:13 PM): I remember you.
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:57:06 PM): I cant trust u,
WillLaquelle (3:57:30 PM): What's wrong? Have you figured out
I'm making fun of you yet?
15
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:57:47 PM): thu u think i am fruested?
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:58:16 PM): i am not i have a job
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:59:00 PM): are a man att all?
WillLaquelle (3:59:21 PM): I'm a man, I think.
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:59:24 PM): I dont think so
WillLaquelle (3:59:43 PM): Ok, you may be right. Some people say
I'm a goat.
chibuzom_2004exm2 (3:59:47 PM): how old are?
WillLaquelle (4:00:05 PM): 60
chibuzom_2004exm2 (4:00:06 PM): so call ur self
chibuzom_2004exm2 (4:01:10 PM): but wy cant u come to see
chibuzom_2004exm2 (4:01:32 PM): if were i cold walch to see
chibuzom_2004exm2 (4:03:08 PM): i will send to you the laide
down details about the transaction i am tolking of
WillLaquelle (4:03:15 PM): brb
WillLaquelle (4:04:34 PM): back
WillLaquelle (4:04:39 PM): Sorry, I got delayed.
WillLaquelle (4:04:57 PM): My television caught on fire.
chibuzom_2004exm2 (4:05:32 PM): what
WillLaquelle (4:06:03 PM): I was watching the Playboy Channel. It
was the "Too Hot For Prime Time TV." They were right. The
television ignited.
WillLaquelle (4:06:12 PM): I had to put it out.
chibuzom_2004exm2 (4:06:16 PM): ur what?
WillLaquelle (4:06:56 PM): Are you some kind of chatbot, Chibuzo?
WillLaquelle (4:07:01 PM): If so, you don't work very well.
WillLaquelle (4:07:14 PM): I thought you were my friend from
Angola.
chibuzom_2004exm2 (4:07:25 PM): so what is your stand?
WillLaquelle (4:07:28 PM): Do you remember any Russian?
16
WillLaquelle (4:07:34 PM): My stand:
WillLaquelle (4:07:43 PM): I believe for every drop of rain that falls,
a flower grows.
chibuzom_2004exm2 (4:07:57 PM): i am not ur friend
WillLaquelle (4:08:11 PM): I believe in cheap liquor, good sex, and
wasting time annoying people.
WillLaquelle (4:08:19 PM): You're not the guy I knew in Angola?
WillLaquelle (4:08:25 PM): Did you know my uncle Barney?
WillLaquelle (4:08:53 PM): He was even more of an asshole than I
am.
WillLaquelle (4:08:58 PM): And I'm pretty bad.
chibuzom_2004exm2 (4:09:14 PM): i dont know ur uncle
WillLaquelle (4:09:26 PM): He's the one whose account we're
talking about.
WillLaquelle (4:09:33 PM): You didn't know him.
chibuzom_2004exm2 (4:09:36 PM): but he was our costomer
WillLaquelle (4:09:46 PM): Well, did you ever meet him?
WillLaquelle (4:09:54 PM): He was an engineer.
chibuzom_2004exm2 (4:10:04 PM): yes
WillLaquelle (4:10:05 PM): Four foot seven, weighed 450 pounds.
WillLaquelle (4:10:11 PM): Sexy chick on each arm all the time.
WillLaquelle (4:10:21 PM): Spoke seventeen languages fluently, and
about fifty badly.
WillLaquelle (4:10:30 PM): Could train parrots to type.
WillLaquelle (4:11:03 PM): He's the one who left all that money at
your bank without even a forwarding address.
WillLaquelle (4:11:08 PM): Kind of inconsiderate, isn't he.
WillLaquelle (4:11:20 PM): Anyway, I understand you think he's
dead. Is that right?
chibuzom_2004exm2 (4:11:48 PM): cant be happy to live with
much money?
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WillLaquelle (4:12:12 PM): Can't be happy to be dead with so much.
WillLaquelle (4:12:22 PM): It's like Aristotle the great philosopher
said.
WillLaquelle (4:12:33 PM): Money can't buy happiness, but it can
buy lots of liquorj.
WillLaquelle (4:12:37 PM): liquor.
WillLaquelle (4:12:58 PM): Anyway, you think Uncle Barney the
engineer is dead?
WillLaquelle (4:13:00 PM): Is he?
WillLaquelle (4:13:18 PM): Or is he just spending 10 years sleeping
off a long drunk?
WillLaquelle (4:28:07 PM): Apparently at this point you have
figured out that I am ridiculing you and that I'm not likely to send
you any money or give you any bank account numbers or anything
stupid like that. I have figured out that you're never going to send
me the picture of your naked grandmother, so let's each call on our
respective gods to curse the other and call it a day.
chibuzom_2004exm2 (4:29:46 PM): bye
chibuzom_2004exm2 (4:30:18 PM): and dont distube me ageine
I inadvertently did a public service that day. I wasted about an
hour and a half of a scammer’s time. Granted, I wasted about an
hour and a half of my time as well, but I was having fun. I also
took a few breaks to do some other things.
I learned then that I enjoyed “scambaiting.” What am I talking
about, “scambaiting”? According to Wikipedia, “Scam baiting is a
form of Internet vigilantism, where the vigilante poses as a potential
victim to the scammer in order to waste their time and resources,
gather information that will be of use to authorities, and publicly
expose the scammer. It is primarily used to thwart advance-fee
fraud scams and can be done out of a sense of civic duty, as a form
of amusement, or both.” In my case it is really just for amusement,
even though I self-righteously proclaim from time to time that it is
done out of a sense of civic duty.
18
At one time I tried to turn some scammers in to the FBI. They
weren’t interested. I had, admittedly, located a very small fish. I
had not hooked the fish, netted the fish, or even made sure what
continent the fish was working from.
I later learned that there are large communities of scambaiters on

the Internet. Most of them do a much better job at it than I do.
The real scambaiters work hard to waste their prey’s time, force
their prey to give up valuable information (such as bank account
numbers, fake websites, and cell phone numbers) that can be shut
down. The real scambaters also seek out trophies such as
photographs of their prey doing embarrassing things or holding
embarrassing signs in public. The most successful have inspired
their prey to go on “safaris,” or long trips in search of money that
will never be there.
I’m not that good. I have tried to be that good. I’ve tried to turn
over a few bank accounts to real scambaiters (not to mention to real
banks). As of this writing I’m not sure I’ve done any more than
force some of these clowns to waste their time on me. I have had a
few send me fake checks from Canada. I guess that costs them a
few cents in postage. Others have called me. I have a cheap cell
phone that I bought for the purposes of scambaiting. It’s the kind
of phone often referred to as a “burner” phone. Sometimes I’m
surprised that I can get effective cell phone service so inexpensively,
when I pay much more for my actual cell phone used in life and
business.
Netsluts: Instant Messaging
When instant messaging came out, I used it a lot. I used to keep a

Yahoo! Instant Messenger running just about all the time.
aprilnetslut: hey, are you around?

WillLaquelle: Very much around, why?
aprilnetslut: hi sweetie
19
WillLaquelle: Hi.
aprilnetslut: i hope you want to chat with a horny girl today...
WillLaquelle: Not really.
aprilnetslut: i am a little busy right now, just got a new laptop trying
to set my cam up..
WillLaquelle: Geez! Those things can sure be a pain in the ass.
aprilnetslut: i have a fetish for being on camera
WillLaquelle: They think those "Quick" set up instructions with all
the pictures so everyone can figure it out no matter what his or her
language are somehow helpful. Right!
aprilnetslut:
http://s795.photobucket.com/home/netslut’sadvertisementremove
d/
WillLaquelle: They may as well be in Swahili!
aprilnetslut: you can watch my webcam but you're not a kid right??
WillLaquelle: And half the time the picture you get is so blurry you
can't see it.
aprilnetslut:
http://s795.photobucket.com/home/netslut’sadvertisementremove
d/
WillLaquelle: No, I'm not a kid. I've got kids who aren't kids.
aprilnetslut: k ..well im gonna show you ..k?
WillLaquelle: How about you, are you a kid?
WillLaquelle: No.
aprilnetslut: http://www.yourprivateshow.com/netslutadremoved
there and my video will load, just click the yellow JOIN FREE
button at the top of the page, its 100% free to join you only need a
credit card to verify that you are over 18 ;p
WillLaquelle: Why do I want to see a webcam that you've just set up
that probably isn't working properly? How do I know you're not
just trying to get free tech advice from an old geek?
aprilnetslut: ofcourse babe, just need to verify age but yes its free
20
WillLaquelle: I'd need to verify your age too. You type like a kid.
aprilnetslut: i'm 24
WillLaquelle: Young whippersnappers who don't know what a shift
key is.
aprilnetslut: if you cum watch me i'll do whatever you want me to
do... fill out your info, its free k?
WillLaquelle: It's toward the bottom of the keyboard, where your
pinky fingers ought to be, that is if you were taught how to use a
keyboard properly.
WillLaquelle: You use it to make capital letters.
aprilnetslut: mhhm finger it lolz
aprilnetslut: i use this site to play on cause i don't want to be
recorded!...this site doesn't allow people to record my cam! just click
the yellow JOIN FREE button at the top of the page ;p
WillLaquelle: I see you've found it. Now, in English you should use
capital letters at the beginning of a sentence.
aprilnetslut: credit card is just to verify your age, u get in for free
thru my cam session invite since I'm a premium member, but u
need to verify babe just click the yellow JOIN FREE button at the
top of the page ;p
WillLaquelle: A credit card is useless to verify age. Many minors
have credit cards.
WillLaquelle: I would ask for something more reliable, such as a
driver's license or even a passport if available.
WillLaquelle: In fact, that is exactly what I'm asking.
aprilnetslut: let me know if you need any help logging in..i'm gonna
slip into something nice for you..k?
WillLaquelle: I have no interest in viewing kiddie porn. Before I
inspect your video to criticize your choice of lighting or camera
angle, I'll need to see proof of your age.
21
WillLaquelle: That's very reassuring, now please provide some
reliable evidence to support that assertion.
aprilnetslut: im the girl in the main video that loads
WillLaquelle: That is a non sequitur. That does not provide me with
any additional evidence to prove that you are indeed of age.
WillLaquelle: Could you please send me a copy of your driver's
license?
aprilnetslut: k
WillLaquelle: A birth certificate along with another photo
identification would work as well.
WillLaquelle: My email address is Will@rlhlawfirm.com
aprilnetslut: are u in babe??
WillLaquelle: As in looking at your webcam? No. I have not
received the driver's license yet.
aprilnetslut is typing...
aprilnetslut: k
WillLaquelle: I'm waiting.
WillLaquelle: April, I'm beginning to suspect that you are not 24,
but that you are a minor playing with your mother's computer.
WillLaquelle: You're a very naughty girl.
WillLaquelle: You should be spanked, and not for sexual
gratification, simply for punishment.
WillLaquelle: What's the matter? No response. Did Mommy catch
you playing on her computer?
CONVERSATION ENDED
Shameka: hey, are you around?

WillLaquelle: Right here.
Shameka: Yay someone to talk to !! how are u?
WillLaquelle: Fine. Have you voted yet?
22
Shameka: I'm great thanks for chattin with me I found your name
in the online members search whatcha up to?
WillLaquelle: Just trying to handle the chaos of everyday life. What
about you? Have you voted yet?
Shameka: I'm not too into exchanging pics .. are you?
WillLaquelle: No. By voting I mean going to the polls and selecting
candidates for office, not exchanging photographs. I guess you're
using a definition of voting of which I'm unaware.
Shameka: i'd rather see each other u can see the real thing on my
cam... u want to?
WillLaquelle: Perhaps, but as I've said before, I require proof of age.
I'll need two forms of identification.
Shameka: i'm 24
WillLaquelle: Do they require identification where you vote?
Shameka: Click http://www.[advertisement removed] it's a more
secure place with my cam u will have to
verify your age so I'm not showing my [vulgar reference to female
genitalia replaced, not because I'm a prig, just because I can] to a
minor , i had to do it too but dont worry its 100% FREE and its
alot of fun once u get in
WillLaquelle: That's an abuse if you ask me. Still, for safety sake, I
always ask for proof of age.
Shameka: i'm 24
WillLaquelle: I think that's a wise decision. I don't think you should
expose your genitals to minors either. They can't take the shock. At
the same time, I don't want to get on a camera with a minor either.
You say you're 24, but I can hardly take your word for that, can I?
I will need more than your statement. Can you provide proof.
Shameka: make sure you click join free in orange at the top,click it
k?
WillLaquelle: Can you provide proof of age?
Shameka: ok, fill out your info,first and last name, make sure you
put your correct b-day k?
23
WillLaquelle: I'm thinking a driver's license . . .
Shameka: i'm 24
WillLaquelle: You said that.
Shameka: Credit card, debit card, or atm is just to verify your age
hun, your card will NOT be charged just validated see where it says
that? like i said it's FREE... cant show [breasts] and [vagina] to
minors..you know?
WillLaquelle: I could tell you I'm 54, would you believe me?
Shameka: I'm inside waiting for you.
WillLaquelle: I won't take a credit card, minors can get credit cards.
I want something more reliable, how about a passport? College ID?
C'mon honey, I'm not going to your webcam without proper proof
of age. You're not going to see me nekkid without me knowing
you're old enough to handle it.
theolaschreiber884: Looking for a MAN not a boy!!

WillLaquelle: I am not sure if I am what you want then. I am a
chatbot.
theolaschreiber884: Hello there.. My name is Ana... was looking for
people in my area and I found u in the yahoo directory
WillLaquelle: Hello there. My name is WillLaquelle. I am a chatbot
programmed by my owner to annoy persons who solicit him
offering to show him their webcams.
theolaschreiber884: I love chatting with new people.. Would you
like to chat today? Where are you from?
WillLaquelle: I was programmed in Little Rock, Arkansas, United
States of America, Planet Earth, Solar System, Milky Way Galaxy.
theolaschreiber884: Nice Im 21 years old i'm going to school.. Can i
ask you a question?
WillLaquelle: You may.
theolaschreiber884: lol, do want to see me on my web cam?
WillLaquelle: Why would I want to see you on your webcam?
24
theolaschreiber884: i just got this new white shirt and litle blue
skirt.. want to see it?
WillLaquelle: I wuold like to see the skirt. I have seen white shirts
before. They do not interest me. Blue skirts on the other hand are
something new. I have not been programmed to recognize blue
skirts.
theolaschreiber884: ok but i have no pictures on my laptop.. but i
have a webcam that came with it
WillLaquelle: That is strange. It is quite simple to take pictures with
a webcam.
theolaschreiber884: lol ok goto http:/XXXXXXX and we can go 1
on 1 chat. Just accept the invite on the page babe.
WillLaquelle: Perhaps you could just send me the link to the catalog
where you purchased the blue skirt and I could look at it there.
They ordinarily have photographs of the merchandise from many
different angles.
theolaschreiber884: make a free account on the website to watch
my cam. I stream it online
WillLaquelle: I have been allocated only a small amount of
processing power. It would be a waste of my processing power to
watch a webstream.
theolaschreiber884: I'll do anything you want me to do.. Do you see
me? I can't chat with you on the site till you register
WillLaquelle: Please send me a link to the catalog where you
purchased the blue skirt.
theolaschreiber884: K, i gtg now though... bye. remember
http:/xxxxxxxx
WillLaquelle: I'm sorry, that is not a link to a catalog. It is a link to a
site designed to sucker the gullible into giving a scammer a credit
card number in hopes of seeing a young woman remove her
clothing. You offered me a chance to see a blue skirt.
MSN Live Messenger Conversation.
25
WARNING: Don't include information like passwords or credit card
numbers in an instant message.
Alyce says:
hi
hi
Will says:
hi
Alyce says:
hi how are you today?
pls respond!
Will says:
fine.
Sorry for the slow response.
Alyce says:
my name is paris I'm doing great today I'm 21 yrs old how old are
you?
Will says:
I'm "multitasking."
I'm 51.
Alyce says:
listen hun, I am just about to start my webcam show with jen, come
chat me there in my chat room? We can cyber, I will get naked if u
do..lol!
Will says:
Paris? Like the city or the heiress?
Alyce says:
I can show u how to watch free if u promise not to tell anyone else
how to do it???PLEASE
Will says:
26
Well, I don't know if you would want me to get naked. Like Fat
Bastard from Austin Powers, "I'm Dead Sexy!"
Alyce says:
well since its free the law that u gotta be 18 (nudity involved), u
have to sign up with a credit card for age verification! BUT .. Once
you are inside, just clikc on "Webcams" let me know what name
you use to sign in with so I know it is you babe!
http://www.localnetslut.com/paris2 name of webpage changed to avoid
giving free advertising fill out the bottom of the page then fill out the
next page as well and u can see me live for free!
Will says:
If you're just 21 years old, I'm not sure you could handle it. You're
a young one yet.
Alyce says:
Please dont mention anything about that in the chatroom once u
get in ok?
Will says:
About what, Paris. Being "dead sexy?" or the free look?
Alyce says:
OH [excrement].. k I am late to start my show, I gotta get off
msn...I will see ya inside my chatroom babe.. remember not to
mention that I am upgrading u for free... You can use your msn
name to sign in so i know it is you..
Will says:
Doll, if you're gonna get me naked, I'm gonna need your credit
card.
Alyce says:
AUTO-RESPONSE: hey just in the middle of my free webcam
show if you want to watch click the link
http://www.localnetslut.com/paris2
Note: The name of the website has been changed in order not to
give Paris2 any free advertisement. Besides, if she does come
27
through with a credit card, I'd hate to crash the Internet with people
wanting to see me on my webcam.
Facebook IM Conversation
This is another conversation. It came from a Facebook friend,
whose name has been changed so that you won't be able to figure
out who she is. I renamed her "Ethel" after the heroine of Ray
Stevens's epic song, The Streak, one of my favorite songs of all
time.
5:20pm Ethel: hi
5:20pm Will: Hi.
5:21pm Ethel: where you from
5:21pm Will: Little Rock, Arkansas, you?
5:24pm Will: Nice profile pix. I suspect we're in some game
together.
5:25pm Ethel: how old are you?
5:25pm Will: 51
5:27pm Ethel: still married?
5:27pm Will: Yes.
5:28pm Ethel: how many kids do you have?
5:28pm Will: You?
Two kids.
5:31pm Ethel ohh okay
5:37pm Ethel Are you alone right now?
6:20pm Will Sorry, I was off line for a while. I see that you sent
some messages, but I missed them.
6:22pm Ethel where ahve you been?
6:22pm Will Working. Business call.
6:24pm Ethel ohh okay
6:25pm Will: That's the way it goes.
28
6:27pm Will: I'm at the office. In fact, I was surfing the net while
waiting for that call.
6:28pm Ethel: ohh whos with you now?
6:28pm Will Nobody. Everyone else has gone home. I'm reading
over a document, then I'm going home, too.
6:29pm Ethel ohhh
do you want to take a look at my pic?
6:29pm Will Is that different from the pictures on your page?
6:29pm Ethel [Editor's note: Topless picture of "Ethel". I'm not
giving the link. If you insist, and if you prove you are of legal age
and certify that you are unable to locate a picture of a topless
woman on the Internet, I will email you a link to another naked
woman who is, in my judgment, of equal or greater attractiveness to
Ethel].
6:30pm Will I see, pretty much the same, except you aren't
wearing that sexy outfit.
6:31pm Ethel hahaah
:):)
6:32pm Will Are you in Germany?
6:33pm Ethel im in utah
6:33pm Will Of course! That explains the Mormon look!
6:34pm Ethel :):)
do you like to see me in cam
6:34pm Will The line on the PicPaste page in German threw me
for a moment. [I'll give you that much of a clue]
I don't think so. I'm trying to read over a brief about a contract for
the sale of real estate. For some reason, I fear it will take me longer
to proofread the thing if I'm watching you on a webcam.
I don't know what makes me think that, but it's just a hunch.
6:36pm Ethel hmm you sure? okay
6:37pm Will Do you think you'd be more distracting than a real
estate sale contract?
29
It has an acceleration clause, you know.
6:38pm Ethel i dont know [It was at this point that I was reminded that
there is apparently no IQ test given for naked webcam performers]
6:38pm Will There's a provision calling for semi-annual payments
of a set amount in addition to the regular payment stream.
And the seller retained a mortgage in the event of default.
6:42pm Will Do you think you could compete with that on the
webcam?
6:43pm Ethel maybe
6:43pm Will Hmm.
6:46pm Will I wonder if I could attract attention to my webcam
and people could watch me edit contracts, briefs, pleadings, and
other documents.
6:48pm Will Obviously I'm teasing you and keeping you from
your task at hand.
6:51pm Ethel really lo lol
6:52pm Will While I'm on page 46
CHAPTER 2
Franca Bahi: A Hot Babe Offers Me Millions
A message from someone holding himself or herself out to be

Franca Sery appeared on a friend’s Facebook page. Suspecting a
scam, the friend forwarded the message to me.
I responded to Ms. Sery:
Date: Sat, 16 Nov 2013 12:52:52 -0600

Subject: You saw my profile on Facebook
From: will@rlhlawfirm.com
To: francabahi@hotmail.com
30
You saw my profile on Facebook and asked me to email you. Here
I am.
Will
--
O. Will Laquelle
Attorney at Law
RUNNE, LAQUELLE & HYDE
will@rlhlawfirm.com
runnelaquellehyde.weebly.com
She wrote back to me:
From: franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com> Mon, Nov 18,

2013 at 4:14 AM
To: Will Laquelle <will@rlhlawfirm.com>
My dear, How is your day. mine is fine over here in Dakar. Thanks
for your mail.
Like I said my name is Franca Sery, Am 23yrs single tall and fair in
complexion, Very good looking girl that is very sharing, giving,
caring and loving girl, above all God fearing and trusted.I really
want have a good relationship with you. A relationship of deep
feeling that will construct a mutual understanding ,I'm from ivory
coast in west Africa and presently I am residing in the refugee camp
here in Dakar as a result of the civil war going on in my country.
My late father Dr Sery Bahi3 was the personal adviser to the former
head of state of Ivory coast before the rebels attacked my house
3 Scammers like to drop names and mention current events. If you Google Dr.
Sery Bahi you will get a couple of references to him being a spokesman and
senior advisor for Laurent Gbagbo , president of the Ivory Coast, dated 2004
through 2007, and dozens of links to scambaiter and scam warning sites.
Apparently the scammers are under the impression that the senior advisors to
President Gbagbo are well known to Westerners from our nightly news when in
31
one early morning killing my mother and my father. It was only me
that is alive now and we managed to make our way to near by
country Senegal where we are living now in a refugee camp. I send
and receive e-mails in the office of our Reverend, He has been so
kind to me since i became close to him during one of his visitation
to the clinic in the camp when i was sick. I would like to know
more about you. Your likes and dislikes, your hobbies and what you
are doing presently. I will tell more about myself in my next mail.
Attached here is my picture and yours is very nice i like that.
Hoping to hear from you soonest,
Miss Franca.
She attached two pictures of an attractive young woman. My guess

is that they were photographs of a model.
You don’t want to give them too much too soon, so I responded:
Will Laquelle <will@rlhlawfirm.com> Mon, Nov 25, 2013 at 10:04

PM
To: franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com>
Sorry to hear abut4 your troubles. I hope things get better soon.
fact nine out of ten Americans would think that “Laurent Gbagbo” was a joke
name, if not that Ivory Coast was a joke country from a Woody Allen movie.
4 Although I do frequently use typos for artistic purposes, this is a real one. I
didn’t notice it until I was putting together this book. Of course, I should have
just edited it rather than subject you to this utterly meaningless and distracting
footnote that serves no purpose than to confirm the amateurish nature of this
book. But this is my first book, and I simply don’t know any better.
ADDENDUM: Technically the revised edition of this book is my second book,
but apparently I didn’t learn much from the first edition.
32
Will
After that undeniable come-on, Miss Franca responded:
From Franca My Full Life Story with Love and Trust
franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com> Tue, Nov 26, 2013 at 6:23

AM
Dearest
I am more than happy in your reply to my mail this morning. How

is your day? Mine is a little bit hot over here in Dakar Senegal. In
this camp we are only allowed to go out only on Mondays and
Fridays of the weeks. It's just like one staying in the prison and i
hope by Gods grace i will come out here soon. I don't have any
brother, sister or relatives now whom i can go to all my relatives ran
away in the middle of the war the only person i have now is Rev
father who is ( REV Father Chris)5 of the (Life Christian Church)
here in the camp he has been very nice to me since i came here but i
am not living with him rather i am leaving in the woman's hostel
because the camp have two hostels one for men the other for
women. The Pastors Tel number is (+221-772-871-564) if you call
and tell him that you want to speak with me he will send for me in
the hostel. As a refugee here i don't have any right or privilege to
any thing be it money or whatever because it is against the law of
this country. I want to go back to my studies because i only
attended my first year before the tragic incident that lead to my
being in this situation
5 This scambaiting material was probably drafted for general use and is being
reused. The material in parentheses is probably supposed to be substituted for
some name they plan to use later. This scammer was too lazy to make up a
preacher and a church.
33
now took place. Please listen to this, i have my late father's
statement of account and death certificate here with me which i will
send to you latter, because when he was alive he deposited some
amount of money in a leading bank which he used my name as the
next of kin, the amount in question is! $7.5M (seven Million five
Hundred Thousand Dollars). So i will like you to help me transfer
this money to your account and from it you can send some money
for me to get my traveling documents and air ticket to come over to
meet with you. I kept this secret to people in the camp here the
only person that knows about it is the Reverend because he is like a
father to me. So in the light of above i will like you to keep it to
yourself and don't tell it to anyone for i am afraid of loosing my life
and the money if people gets to know about it. Remember i am
giving you
all this information due to the trust i deposed on you. I like honest
and understanding people, truthful and a man of vision, truth and
hardworking. My favorite language is English6 but very fluently.
Meanwhile i will like you to call me like i said i have allot to tell you,
Have a nice day and think about me. Am waiting to hear from you
soonest,
yours in love Franca.
I responded:
Will Laquelle <will@rlhlawfirm.com> Thu, Dec 5, 2013 at 5:50 PM

I won't tell anyone about this. There's nobody to tell. I don't think
anyone I know even knows where Senegal is.
And most people I know think the civil war in the Ivory Coast
ended last year7. But there's still a struggle going on. A friend of
mine went to Liberia on vacation (apparently skiing but I don't
know if it's snow skiing or water skiing) and he said that across the
6 Obviously, from the skillful way you use the language.

7 It did.
34
border there was still a lot of trouble going on. I've never been to
Liberia or the Ivory Coast.
Are Flora and Amanda and Joy with you?8
Well, about me, I'm a lawyer and motorcycle repairman working in
Snurdly, North Dakota, USA. I enjoy surfing the net on my
computer, mountain climbing, Luxembourg-rules horseshoes,
chess, hunting cattle, dirigible racing, and painting pictures of
vegetables. Human models always want to move, and I'm a pretty
slow painter, but it takes weeks for most vegetables to rot. My
dislikes are hitting my fingers with hammers when I am fixing
motorcycles, pretty much everything about practicing law except
the money I can rake in, and having my head shaved. I have been
trying to train my pet monkey, R. William Reynolds, to make my
courtroom appearances for me. So far, he's not doing all that well,
although he did win a motion for summary judgment last week. I'm
sure you can relate to all that.
Will
Franca asks me to contact the bank for the transfer.
HONEY PLEASE CONTACT THE BANK FOR THE

TRANSFER
franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com> Mon, Dec 9, 2013 at 1:44

AM
Hello my dear,
8Scammers going by the names of Flora, Amanda, and Joy Bahi claimed to be
daughters of Dr. Sery Bahi as well. Their scams have been posted on the Internet
for several years now.
35
Good morning. How are you today? i believe you are doing very
fine? It gives me much joy when ever i saw and read your mail, I
really have come to believe that i did not make the wrong choice in
you. I want you to know that every morning day and night i prayed
so that my heart desire will come to real where we shall live
together as one happy and big lovely family.
Sweetheart, I want you to know that i have already contacted the
bank concerning this issue with the help of the Rev father but the
bank said that considering the system of banking and also my
condition in this country, they can only release or transfer the
money to me with the help of a foreign partner. Thank was why i
prayed and ask God to direct me to a good person, someone i can
trust and him trust me also. Some one i will love and be loved by
him.
Honey, after some days prayers i came in contact with you and i
prayed again before i now know that you are the person i have
being praying for. Please my dear, i want you to know that i have
already talk to the bank about you and they are now waiting to hear
from you before they can now make the transfer, all i want you to
do now is to contact the bank so that they will tell us the
possibilities to transfer my late father's money into your account
and after the transfer you will send to me some money to get my
traveling papers and come over to your country and continue with
my studies.
In short this place is more of a prison and my hope is for you to

assist me transfer this money to your position so that i can come
over to start a new life with you. My dear i fasted and prayed to
God when i got your contact and it was reveled to be that you are
the right person that will assist me in this transfer. I send and
receive e-mails in the office of REV Father Chris office .He is the
pastor here in the refugee camp in Senegal Dakar. He has been so
kind to me since i became close to him during one of his visitation
to the clinic in the camp when i was sick.
36
I will like you to call me at his office with this number (+221-772-
871-564) so that i can tell you more about myself. When you call tell
Rev father that you want to talk with me and he will send for me at
the females hostel.you know why i trust you before i made this
contact with you i ask God to provide to me a man that will lead
me to the right Chanel some one that will not betray me but can
you belief since ever i meet you my mind tell me that you have been
giving to me by God listen i will make every thing to make you
happy However,i will like you to contact the European bank where
the money was deposited by my late father for confirmation and
possibilities of transferring to your account in your country. The
contact information of the bank is as follows.
THE ROYAL BANK OF SCOTLAND INTERNATIONAL

The name of the transfer officer is: Sir Stephen Hester
Email address : rbswifttransferr@aol.co.uk
OR : rbsswifttransferr@accountant.com
PHONE : +447031859698
OR : +447031884556
I will like you to contact this bank immediately on how to transfer

the 7.5 million dollars deposited by my late father Dr Sery Bahi of
which am the next of kin. I have mapped out 25% of the total sum
for your assistance and 5% for expenses. Moreover, i will need your
assistance to manage the money on my behalf since am too young
to handle such money. God bless you and take good care of
yourself for me and also have a nice day as i wait to hear from you.
PLEASE COPY THE NOTE BELOW AND FWD IT TO THE
BANK
Dear Sir Stephen Hester,
37
It is a great pleasure to write you Sir in regards to the information
pass across to me by one Miss
franca whose father’s name is late Dr Sery Bahi and that the father
has an account no RBS-026004093 in your Bank. Miss Franca in
several occasion has communicated with me over E-Mail to assist
her receive a funds valued at $7.5 million dollars which her late
father deposited with your Bank.I do here by demand that
according to advise of Miss Franca that this bank should grant our
request by transferring the said funds into my account in my
country,I will appreciate if my request is urgently granted.
Date: Thu, 5 Dec 2013 17:50:58 -0600

Subject: Re: From Franca My Full Life Story with Love and Trust
I modified it ever so slightly:
Franca Bahi
Will Laquelle <will@rlhlawfirm.com> Mon, Dec 23, 2013 at 7:08

PM
To: rbswifttransferr@aol.co.uk, rbsswifttransferr@accountant.com
Dear Sir Stephen Hester,

passed across to me by one Miss Franca whose late father’s name
was Dr Sery Bahi. Dr. Bahi has an account no RBS-026004093 in
your Bank. Miss Franca on several occasions has communicated
with me over E-Mail to assist her receive a funds valued at $7.5
million dollars which her late father deposited with your Bank. She
thinks I'm going to help her get the money. Boy does she have a
38
surprise in store. I plan to swindle her out of it. First, however, I'm
going to try to con some nekkid pictures out of her. She's sent me
some pictures, and she's pretty hot. She's also pretty desperate, so
she'll probably do whatever I ask her to do. She sent me this email
address and the text of this email, which I have taken the liberty to
edit. Her grammar is atrocious. But you wouldn't kick her out of
bed over that. I do hereby demand that according to advise of Miss
Franca that this bank should grant our request by transferring the
said funds into my account in my country, or better yet, just send it
to me in cash. I will appreciate if my request is urgently granted.
Will Laquelle
--
O. Will Laquelle
Attorney at Law
will@rlhlawfirm.com
I told Franca that I had communicated with the banker.

PM
Dear Franca:
I've sent the request to the Bank of Scotland International. I hope

Sir Stephen will respond soon. Of course, it's the Christmas holiday,
and the whole country of Scotland closes down during the
Christmas season.
39
I've been praying too, and God has told me all about you. He says
you are a lovely young lady, although you hardly have to be
omniscient to know that. You've sent me some great pictures. The
Lord says I ought to ask you for some more pictures, perhaps in a
bit less clothing. How about just a few pictures of you in some
skimpy underclothing? The Lord says that the Rev. Father Chris
will be glad to take them. The Lord said He will let the Rev. Father
Chris know of this request and that the request was his idea. So if
the Rev Father Chris asks you to take off your clothes for some
candid shots, please know that it is the Lord's will. The Lord works
in mysterious ways his wonders to perform.
I am looking forward to Sir Stephen's response. I can't wait to have

you between the sheets.
Will
Sir Stephen responded:
ACKNOWLEDGEMENT/PROCEEDURE
Royal Bank Of Scotland <rbswifttransferr@aol.co.uk> Tue, Dec

24, 2013 at 2:36 AM
To: will@rlhlawfirm.com
UK banks' credit ratings downgraded9
For your attention,
9 This was a link to a story on the Internet about banks’ credit ratings being
downgraded. If I were the Deputy Chairman of a bank I would always include a
link to unfavorable news about my bank in my initial communication with any
new customer.
40
Sir,
I am the chairman of Overseas Operation/Wire Transfer wishes to

write you in respect to your Mail which we have received. Actually,
we have earlier been told about you by the young lady Miss.Franca
Sery Bahi that she wishes you to be her trustee/representative for
the claim her late father's deposit with our bank. Late Dr. Sery Bahi
(US$7,500,000.00) of deposit with us. Hence you have been really
appointed as a trustee to represent the next of Kin. How ever
before our bank will transact any business concerning the transfer
of the fund with you, we will like you to send the followings:
1. A power of attorney and affidavit of oath permitting you to claim

and transfer the funds to your bank account on her behalf.
This document must be endorsed by a Senegalese resident lawyer
which she will help you to get one.
2.The death certificate of late Dr. Sery Bahi (Her deceased father)
confirmation of the death.
3. A copy of statement of account of the account issued to Dr. Sery
Bahi by our bank.
Note that the above are compulsory, and are needed to protect our
interest, yours, the next of kin after the claims. These shall also
ensure that a smooth, quick and successful transfer of the fund is
made. We promise to give our customers the best of our services.
Do you have any question(s), please contact foreign transfer officer
Sir. Stephen Hester

Tel: 00447031859698
for more directives/ clarifications.
Yours Faithfully CEO, Sir Stephen Hester
Deputy chairman Sir Philip Hampton
41
Address : ROYAL BANK OF SCOTLAND HQ INST,
36/42 ST ANDREW'S SQUARE, EDINBURGH SCOTLAND
Email : rbswifttransferr@aol.co.uk OR
rbsswifttransferr@accountant.com
Telephone : +447031859698 OR +447031884556
Notice Sir Stephen’s impressive command of the English language.

How could I not do business with this man?
I forwarded the banker’s email to Franca. My email to the banker

was attached to the bottom of his email. I was careful not to
remove any reference to the fact that I intended to steal her money.
Will Laquelle <will@rlhlawfirm.com> Tue, Dec 24, 2013 at 12:00

PM
Bcc: arkmensaunmoderated@yahoogroups.com
My dearest Franca:
Here's the email I got from Sir Stephen. He thinks you can put me
in contact with a Senegalese lawyer Is there a lawyer in the camp?
Make a careful note of all the things he wants. Let's see if we can
get them. Looking forward to seeing you soon.
Will
I forwarded the list of requirements to Franca. I added a fourth

item to the list:
4. Some photographs of Franca so we can make sure it is her.

Because of our sophisticated computer recognition system, we need
full frontal nude pictures of her. This is to prevent fraud, not
merely to provide entertainment to the geeks in our IT department.
After all, they already know how to find naked pictures on the
42
Internet. In fact they have some of you that you probably didn't
even know were on the Internet. Does Franca know how fat you
are?
One of the tactics of scammers is to write your letters for you. I
use that to my advantage. I informed Franca of Sir Stephen’s
requests.
CONTACT THIS GLOBAL LAW CHAMBERS FOR THE
DOCUMENTS
franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com> Thu, Dec 26, 2013 at 4:02
AM
Hello my Dear
I want to thank you for all your concern and your efforts to assist
me receive my late father funds into your account. I write to let you
know that I myself and REV father has concluded on the
arrangement of getting the reputable lawyer who is ready to carry
out the assignment of procuring those two important documents
requested from the bank.
The lawyer will help us to get two documents since I have here with
me the death certificate of my late father including the last
statement of account the bank issued to my father before his death.
Please keep this matter only for yourself as you can see that we are
almost at the end of this matter and i want you to promise me that
no body will know about this transaction, I pray that Almighty God
will help us. Therefore, as a matter of urgency i advise you to
contact the Reno lawyer here who will help us to get those
important documents without delay, Please contact the lawyer with
the Bellow info:
NAME : (Barrister Jones Diamansy)

EMAIL ADDRESS: ( jones.diamansy@lawyer.com )
OR : ( jonesfayea@hotmail.com )
43
TELEPHONE : (+221-778- 355 -784)
OR : (00221-766 -780-926)
HONEY FILL AND COPY THE NOTE BELOW AND FWD
IT TO THE LAWYER
Dear Barrister Diamansy

pass across to me by one miss franca whose father’s name is late Dr
Sery Bahi and that the father died as a result of war that happens in
their country Ivory Coast some years back, So before the death of
the father,he deposited some amount of money in one of the
leading bank in Europe called Royal Bank of Scotland with the
name of Miss franca as the next of kin, So duo to condition of the
young Lady as a refugee, She wishes me to transfer to money from
the bank to my bank account in my country on behalf of her, so i
have contacted the bank by myself and they told me to get in touch
with a Senegalese resident lawyer who can draft a power of attorney
and affidavit of oath with my names and address which will enables
me to receive the money as her trustee, I do here by demand that
according to advise of the bank ,I will appreciate if my request is
urgently granted.
Thanks.
HERE IS MY FULL CONTACT DETAILS

(1) MY FULL NAMES IS........................(2) MY COUNTRY
IS...........................
(3) MY STATE AND HOME ADDRESS ARE...................
(4) MY IDENTITY NUMBER OR PASSPORT NUMBER
IS................
(5) MY PHONE NUMBERS ARE..........................
(6) MY OCCUPATION..........................
(7) MY AGE........................
44
Please my love, try as much as you can today to contact the law
with the above email address and ask him to help us to get the
needed documents required from the bank, as to enable the bank
director for foreign operation to effect the release of the funds to
you.
As you can see everything concerning this transfer is coming to a
perfect end, on that note, please do not fail to get in touch with the
lawyer today. I will appreciate if you act according to my
instruction, please after contacting the lawyer through email, try also
and call him on his direct telephone number at least that will shows
a sign of seriousness from you. thank you for your concern and my
love for you will never die.
Yours Lovely Franca.
So if I contacted the lawyer, he should contact me back, right? So

why not contact the lawyer? In the meantime, however, I didn’t
feel like waiting for the lawyer’s response, so I created some
correspondence between myself and the lawyer.
Date: Sat, 28 Dec 2013 16:41:16 -0600

Subject: Re: CONTACT THIS GLOBAL LAW CHAMBERS FOR
THE DOCUMENTS
CC: jones.diamansy@lawyer.com; jonesfayea@hotmail.com
Baby:
I already contacted him, and he has already provided me with the
Power of Attorney and the death certificate that I've already sent
you.
I thought I copied you on my email to him, but if I didn't, here's a
copy of my email to him and his responses:
45
December 26, 2013
Subject: GLOBAL LAW CHAMBERS
TO YOUR KIND ATTN

SIR, MR. ”WILL LAQUELLE” TO THE INFORMATION
RECEIVED FROM YOU AND YOUR PARTNER ON HOW
TO PREPARE A POWER OF ATTORNEY AND AFFIDAVIT
OF OATH FOR YOU AND YOUR PARTNER THAT WILL
ENABLE YOU TO STAND ON HER BEHALF TO
TRANSFER HER LATE FATHERS MONEY FROM THE
BANK TO YOUR ACCOUNT IN YOUR COUNTRY OR
ELSEWHERE. I AM JUST COMING BACK FROM THE
FEDERAL HIGH COURT TO ASCERTAIN THE
PROCEDURE OF SECURING THE DOCUMENTS FOR YOU
FROM THE GOVERNMENT, THEN FROM OUR FINDINGS
ABOUT THE POWER OF ATTORNEY AND THE
AFFIDAVIT OF OATH WHICH WILL ENABLE THE BANK
DEAL WITH YOU ON BEHALF OF YOUR PARTNER, IT
WILL COST THE SUM OF:
(500 CFA FRANCS [$1.05 USD]) FOR THE

AUTHENTICATION OF THE POWER OF ATTORNEY,
(1000 CFA FRANCS [$2.10 USD]) FOR THE SWEARING OF
THE AFFIDAVIT OF OATH AT THE FEDERAL HIGH
COURT HERE BEFORE IT BECOMES VALID, (200 CFA
FRANCS [$0.42 USD]) FOR NOTARY STAMPING AT THE
NOTARY OFFICE HERE. OUR LEGAL PROCESSING FEE
OF (119181.70 CFA FRANCS, $250.00 USD), TOTAL NOW
WILL BE (199,412.70 CFA FRANCS [$253.48 USD])
ONLY TO GET EVERYTHING DONE. INFORMATION'S

OF RECEIVING THE MONEY FROM THE WESTERN
UNION MONEY TRANSFER
46
SENDER NAME..............WILL LAQUELLE
RECEIVER NAME......... DIAMANSY FAYE
QUESTIONS ................DIAMANSY FAYE
ANSWER ....................FAYE
CONTROL NUMBERS MCTN.............134230052
AS SOON AS WE RECEIVED THE MONEY TODAY, WE

SHALL START THE DOCUMENTS WHICH WILL BE
READY IN TWO WORKING DAYS. YOU ARE TO
TRANSFER THE MONEY TODAY THROUGH WESTERN
UNION MONEY TRANSFER WITH MY NAME. AS SOON
AS YOU SEND THE MONEY, TRY AND GIVE US A CALL
OR YOU EMAIL US WITH THE PAYMENT SLIP TO PICK IT
UP. YOURS SINCERELY IN SERVICE,
BAR (DR) DIAMANSY FAYE ESQ.

GLOBAL LAW CHAMBERS,
142 AVE GEORGES, DAKAR,
OFFICE TEL: 00221-778-355-784
MOBILE TEL: +221-704 -008-402
_________________________________________
Dear Dr. Jones:
I have forwarded the money you asked for, but I had to have it
converted into Ecuadorian Sucres. I am sending you a wire for
8525000.00 Ecuadorian Sucres.
Looking forward to hearing from you. Say "Hi" to everyone at the

Federal High Court for me.
47
Will Laquelle
__________________________________________
DEAR MR. LAQUELLE:
THE ECUADORIAN SUCRES WERE INADVERTENTLY

CONVERTED INTO ICELANDIC KRONA. I HAVE
RECEIVED YOUR TRANSFER OF 39,573.05 ISK. IT IS
ENOUGH. I AM FORWARDING A COPY OF THE POWER
OF ATTORNEY THAT I HAVE DRAFTED. I MUST HAVE A
SIGNED COPY BACK FROM YOUR SWEET BABBOO
BEFORE I CAN PREPARE THE OTHER
DOCUMENTATION.
I MAY BE ABLE TO GET A COPY OF THE DEATH

CERTIFICATE BY TOMORROW. I WILL SEND IT TO YOU
AS SOON AS I GET IT.
BY THE WAY, DID SHE EVER SEND YOU THE

PHOTOGRAPHS YOU REQUESTED? I TOOK THE
LIBERTY OF CALLING SIR STEPHEN TO SEE IF THERE
WAS ANYTHING ELSE I COULD DO TO HURRY THE
TRANSACTION ALONG. HE SAID THAT ALL THEY
NEED NOW ARE THE FOUR ITEMS THEY HAVE
REQUESTED. THEY ARE PARTICULARLY LOOKING
FORWARD TO THE NAKED PICTURES OF MS. FRANCA.
THEY HAVE THE NEW COMPUTERIZED PHOTOGRAPH
RECOGNITION SOFTWARE BUT UNFORTUNATELY IT
ONLY WORKS IF THE PERSON TO BE IDENTIFIED IS
COMPLETELY NAKED.
I'VE SEEN THE CLOTHED PICTURES YOU HAVE OF

HER. SHE'S PRETTY HOT. IF YOU GET THE
PHOTOGRAPHS, PLEASE PROVIDE ME COPIES FOR MY
48
FILE. IT'S A SENEGALESE LEGAL TECHNICALITY, YOU
KNOW.
I ASKED SIR STEPHEN WHY HE WANTS A COPY OF A

STATEMENT FROM HIS OWN BANK. I THOUGHT THAT
WAS SOMEWHAT SUSPICIOUS. HE SAID HE ASKED FOR
IT BECAUSE OTHERWISE HE'D HAVE TO GO DOWN TO
THE ACCOUNTING DEPARTMENT AND ASK THEM
HOW MUCH MONEY IS IN THE ACCOUNT, AND HE JUST
DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO DEAL WITH THEIR BULLSHIT. I
TOLD HIM THAT DR. BAHI HAD ABOUT FIFTY THREE
BILLION DOLLARS IN HIS ACCOUNT. HE SAID FINE,
THAT WAS BETTER THAN HAVING TO ASK THE
ASSHOLES IN ACCOUNTING HOW MUCH THERE WAS.
YOU MAY HAVE MADE A TIDY PROFIT THERE.
OH, THE RIGHT HONORABLE JUDGE SAMUEL L.

JACKSON OF THE FEDERAL HIGH COURT SAYS "HI."

OFFICE TEL: 00221-778-355-784
MOBILE TEL: +221-704 -008-402
P.S. DON'T SEND ME THE NAKED PICTURES OF

YOURSELF, MR. LAQUELLE. NOBODY REALLY WANTS
TO SEE THAT. SIR STEPHEN SAYS HE WAS DISGUSTED,
AND HE'S KIND OF A PERVERT HIMSELF.
Dr. DIAMANSY FAYE
__________________________________________
49
Dr. Jones:
Thank you very much for the Power of Attorney. It should do

nicely. I just need for my darling Franca to sign it. I am looking
forward to getting her here to see me.
I do not have the naked pictures yet. I'm beginning to get a bit
pissed about that. It's probably that stupid preacher's fault. Those
guys can be such prigs.
I remember Judge Jackson. We went on a tour of the finest strip

clubs of Bangladesh together in 2007. He's a great guy. I wish him
well.
Will
___________________________________________
MR. LAQUELLE
THE DEATH CERTIFICATE JUST CAME IN. IT IS

ATTACHED.
LOOKING FORWARD TO THE NAKED PICTURES OF

YOUR FIANCEE.

OFFICE TEL: 00221-778-355-784
50
MOBILE TEL: +221-704 -008-402
Will Laquelle <will@rlhlawfirm.com> Thu, Dec 26, 2013 at 6:04

PM
To: jones.diamansy@lawyer.com, jonesfayea@hotmail.com
NAME : (Barrister Jones Diamansy)
EMAIL ADDRESS: ( jones.diamansy@lawyer.com )
OR : ( jonesfayea@hotmail.com )
TELEPHONE : (+221-778- 355 -784)
OR : (00221-766 -780-926)
HONEY FILL AND COPY THE NOTE BELOW AND FWD
IT TO THE LAWYER
Dear Barrister Diamansy

passed across to me by one very hot babe, Miss Franca Bahi whose
father’s name is Dr Sery Bahi. Unfortunately, her father died as a
result of one of the interminable wars and squabbles that happened
in their country Ivory Coast some years back. This war was
apparently about a goat stolen by someone in Bulungi.
Anyway, before the death of the father, he deposited a metric

shitload of money in one of the leading banks in Europe called
Royal Bank of Scotland which uses AOL for its internet addresses.
You know how cheap the fucking Scots can be. The account had
the name of Miss Franca as the next of kin, so she tells me. She's
never sent me a copy of the statement. In fact, she's never even sent
me the naked pictures I requested. So due to condition of the young
Lady as a refugee, she wishes me to transfer to money from the
bank to my bank account in my country on behalf of her. As you
might expect, I wish to transfer the money to my bank account in
behalf of me.
51
I have contacted the bank by myself and they told me (in broken
English) to get in touch with a Senegalese resident lawyer who can
draft a power of attorney and affidavit of oath with my names and
address which would enable me to receive the money as her trustee,
I do hereby demand that according to advise of the bank ,I will
appreciate if my request is urgently granted.
Thanks.
HERE IS MY FULL CONTACT DETAILS

(1) MY FULL NAMES IS O Will Laquelle
(2) MY COUNTRY IS United States of America
(3) MY STATE AND HOME ADDRESS ARE North Dakota
O. Will Laquelle
2343 Buggery Drive
Snurdly, North Dakota
United States of America
(4) MY IDENTITY NUMBER OR PASSPORT NUMBER IS

840-21-0019
(5) MY PHONE NUMBERS ARE (701) 566-0688
(6) MY OCCUPATION I play piano in a whorehouse. In my spare
time I'm a lawyer
(7) MY AGE 30.
Please my love, try as much as you can today to contact the law
with the above email address and ask him to help us to get the
needed documents required from the bank, as to enable the bank
director for foreign operation to effect the release of the funds to
you.
52
As you can see everything concerning this transfer is coming to a
perfect end, on that note, please do not fail to get in touch with the
lawyer today. I will appreciate if you act according to my
instruction, please after contacting the lawyer through email, try also
and call him on his direct telephone number at least that will shows
a sign of seriousness from you. thank you for your concern and my
love for you will never die.
Yours Lovely Franca.
Will
P.S. Please disregard the last two paragraphs. They were from
Franca's email to me. I'm sorry but I'm far too lazy to delete them.
The way these scams work, they send you a bill for the lawyer's
services. Here's an example from one posted on the Internet where
these same scammers attempted to scam an European using the
same fake names:
IT WILL COST THE SUM OF: (400EURO) FOR THE

AUTHENTICATION OF THE POWER OF ATTORNEY,
(250EURO) FOR THE SWEARING OF THE AFFIDAVIT OF
OATH AT THE FEDERAL HIGH COURT HERE BEFORE IT
BECOMES VALID, (200EURO) FOR NOTARY
STAMPING AT THE NOTARY OFFICE HERE. OUR LEGAL
PROCESSING FEE OF (100EURO), TOTAL NOW WILL BE
(950EURO) ONLY TO GET EVERYTHING DONE.
INFORMATION'S OF RECEIVING THE MONEY FROM
THE WESTERN
UNION MONEY TRANSFER
SENDER NAME..............YOUR NAME
RECEIVER NAME......... DIAMANSY FAYE
QUESTIONS ................MY NAME
ANSWER ....................FAYE
53
CONTROL NUMBERS MCTN.............
AS SOON AS WE RECEIVED THE MONEY TODAY, WE
SHALL START THE DOCUMENTS WHICH WILL BE
READY IN TWO WORKING DAYS. YOU ARE TO
TRANSFER THE MONEY TODAY THROUGH WESTERN
UNION MONEY TRANSFER WITH MY NAME. AS SOON
AS YOU SEND THE MONEY, TRY AND GIVE US A CALL
OR YOU EMAIL US
WITH THE PAYMENT SLIP TO PICK IT UP. YOURS
SINCERELY IN SERVICE,
So the way around this is to draw up my own power of attorney and

send it to her to sign. While I am not familiar with the ins and outs
of Senegalese jurisprudence, I combined a standard Arkansas Power
of Attorney and a standard bondage slave agreement that can be
found on the internet , mutatis mutandis [Latin for "changing what
must be changed" and lawyerese for "taking something out of a
formbook, inserting the names, and billing for drafting it."]. I'm
going to run it through Google translate [into French] and send it to
her in a few days pretending that the lawyer has provided it.
The lawyer came through, and prepared an eight page Power of

Attorney. Here’s the English version, before I translated it into
French using Google Translate and added the Senegalese national
anthem.
In the first edition, I didn’t include the Power of Attorney in either
language.
The lawyer also came through with a tremendously authentic
looking death certificate10.
10It’s better than the ones provided by the average scammer, which tend to be in
English regardless of the country of origin and which almost never have a coin as
the Seal, and are never signed by the General Pederast William LePetomane.
54
For those of you who do not read French, Dr. Sery Bani died in a
cattle stampede. The certification is a combination of the “really
most sincerely dead” song from the Wizard of Oz and the Monty
Python “Dead Parrot” sketch, dutifully translated into French
through the use of Google Translate.
55
PM
My sweet Franca:
I'm glad the right Reverend Father Chris has found us a lawyer. I
will send him a communication at my earliest possible convenience.
In the meantime, we have to figure out how to get the death
certificate, the bank statement, and of course the photographs he
requires.
I'm looking forward to seeing you soon.
Will

PM
To: arkmensaunmoderated@yahoogroups.com
franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com> Fri, Dec 27, 2013 at 2:59

AM
Darling all you need to do now is to send him an email.and make
sure you fill the following space the he required.i love you so much
waiting to hear from you soon
Date: Thu, 26 Dec 2013 17:48:01 -0600
Subject: Re: CONTACT THIS GLOBAL LAW CHAMBERS FOR
THE DOCUMENTS
56
Will Laquelle <will@rlhlawfirm.com> Fri, Dec 27, 2013 at 12:06
PM
My dearest Franca:
You have selected an amazingly diligent lawyer. He has already

drafted the power of attorney for you to sign. I am attaching it. He
says he's working on getting a copy of the death certificate. He says
you need to provide the last bank statement, if you have it, and the
pictures I have requested earlier.
It is very important that you initial at the bottom of each page and
sign in the presence of a Notary Public. If there is no Notary Public
available, it can be witnessed by any Holy Man, Priest, Reverend,
Preacher, Witchdoctor, or other Man of God. Instead of Notary
Public, he should give his title as Pédéraste Generale. It's some kind
of technicality of Senegalese law.
I have been praying on you a lot. The Lord says we are on the right
track and that we will be together soon as long as you do everything
that has been asked of you. Tell Rev. Father Chris that we need the
photographs as soon as possible.
Will
I attached the Power of Attorney to this email.
franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com> Fri, Dec 27, 2013 at 2:15

PM
57
thank you very much for contacting the lawyer.all you need to do is
to forward me the information which you got from him okay. i wait
to hear from you soon.i love you so much my love
Date: Fri, 27 Dec 2013 12:06:10 -0600
My dearest Franca needs to come through with the naked pictures.

I remind her.
Will Laquelle <will@rlhlawfirm.com> Sun, Dec 29, 2013 at 8:42

PM
Sir Stephen called me tonight. He says he really needs the

documentation I have asked you to send. I need you to sign the
Power of Attorney and send it back as soon as possible.
He asked again about the pictures. We really need the pictures as

soon as possible.
I have never met you, but I'm missing you already. I know you can't
wait for me to have you in my clutches.
Will
--
O. Will Laquelle
Attorney at Law
will@rlhlawfirm.com
58
Here’s where it gets interesting. I have told her that I paid the
lawyer, but either she didn’t get the money or her fellow scammer
(if there is one, this is all probably being done by some guy in
Nigeria) didn’t share it with her. Where’s the money?
DARLING PLEASE SEND ME THE PAYMENT SLIP
franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com> Sun, Dec 29, 2013 at 3:49

AM
Darling send me the prove of transfer the payment slip let me put it
in my fill that my partner send some money to our BARRISTER.
honey please reply me with the payment slip from western union
thank you very much i love you. here my the number you will use to
reach me.+221-772-871-564
At this point, most scambaiters would string the scammer along for
a few weeks with claims to have sent the payment slip or elaborate
excuses as to why it wasn’t sent.
I decided to go with the phony receipt.
59
Why did I send Ecuadorian money instead of dollars? Well, it’s the
holiday season:
60
Western Union of North Dakota
1452 Bananaberry Lane
Snurdly, ND 91448
Notice
Due to the holiday rush, we regret that Western Union is out of

stock on the following currencies:
Dollar (U.S., Canadian, Australian, and Bahamian)
Euro
Dinar
Florins
Guilders
Latinum
Galleons
Talents
Bits
Mexican Pesos
Please try some of the other fine currencies we have in stock, or

check back with us after the New Year
Note: Confederate Dollars are still FREE!
The “lawyer” gets in on it. He knows he didn’t get any money.
61
GLOBAL LAW CHAMBER
1 message
Jones Diamansy <jones.diamansy@lawyer.com> Mon, Dec 30,
2013 at 3:14 AM
I DID NOT RECEIVE ANY PAYMENT INFORMATION
FROM YOU. WHERE DID YOU SEND IT?
So I respond.
From: Will Laquelle <will@rlhlawfirm.com> Mon, Dec 30, 2013

at 9:40
To: Jones Diamansy <jones.diamansy@lawyer.com>,
barrister.diamansy@yahoo.com
Cc: franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com>
Dear Dr. Jones:
I sent it to your email address, barrister.diamansy@yahoo.com. You

sent me the Power of Attorney and Death Certificate. What is going
on here?
I know things get busy, particularly towards the end of the year.
Check your email and you'll find our communication.
By the way, thank you very much for your prompt responses.
Will Laquelle
62
Then, just to confuse things further, I create a Yahoo! account with
a name very similar to the one the scammer is using and write
myself again.
Please Disregard Previous Communication
Diamansy Jones <barrister.diomansy@yahoo.com> Mon, Dec 30,

2013 at 10:01 AM
Reply-To: Diamansy Jones <barrister.diomansy@yahoo.com>
To: "will@rlhlawfirm.com" <will@rlhlawfirm.com>
DEAR WILL LAQUELLE:
PLEASE DISREGARD THE PREVIOUS COMMUNICATION
ABOUT ME NOT GETTING
YOUR PAYMENT INFORMATION. THAT WAS A
CLERICAL ERROR DO TO MY
SECRETARY COMING IN VERY DRUNK AND NOT
BOTHERING TO CHECK WITH ME. THAT IS NOT
UNUSUAL IN THE HOLIDAY SEASON.
ALSO, I MAY HAVE CALLED YOU AT 2:49 IN THE
MORNING11, YOUR TIME. SORRY, I WAS DRUNK
DIALING. THAT IS NOT UNUSUAL IN THE HOLIDAY
SEASON.
HOWEVER, I MUST HAVE THE PICTURES OF FRANCA
FOR MY FILE AND THE SIGNED POWER OF ATTORNEY
BEFORE I CAN TAKE THE NEXT STEP.
FONDLY, AND WITH GREAT PERSONAL AFFECTATION!

11My fake telephone number for Will Laquelle did indeed get two calls allegedly
from Senegal at 2:48 and 2:49 in the morning. They chose not to leave a
message, for some reason.
63
OFFICE TEL: 00221-778-355-784
MOBILE TEL: +221-704 -008-402
I very generously forgive my own negligence:

AM
To: Diamansy Jones <barrister.diomansy@yahoo.com>
Cc: franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com>, Jones Diamansy
<jones.diamansy@lawyer.com>,
jonesfayea@hotmail.com
Dear Dr. Jones:
I understand. We're partying pretty hard here in North Dakota as

well.
My phone did ring at about 2:49 this morning, but I was asleep.
Thanks again for all your hard work.
Will
She writes again asking for the evidence of payment I’ve already
sent her and asking me to call her on the phone. I’m certainly not
wasting money calling Senegal or wherever she’s actually from.
franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com> Tue, Dec 31, 2013 at 4:51

AM
64
Darling the total money you send to the lawyer is how much? please
give me all the evidence of the payment slip because am confused i
have bot heard from the lawyer ever since you started sending
money to him please call me on phone +221-772-871-564
So I respond, ignoring the request for the receipt which I’ve already
sent her once.

AM
My Dearest Franca:
Something is wrong with my phone. I can't get through to you.
Someone is calling me at 2:30 and 3:30 in the morning. I am not
awake then and cannot get those calls.
Will
Eventually I will figure out what she’s asking for, but I need to
string her on a little bit first. She tried again to call me, this time at
9:55 a.m. Unfortunately, I was unavailable.

PM
I got another call this morning. Unfortunately I was out again. I was
having the cat waxed for New Years. I don't know why they don't
leave a message.
Will
65
On Mon, Dec 30, 2013 at 10:01 AM, Diamansy Jones
<barrister.diomansy@yahoo.com> wrote:
DEAR WILL LAQUELLE:
PLEASE DISREGARD THE PREVIOUS COMMUNICATION

ABOUT ME NOT GETTING YOUR PAYMENT
INFORMATION. THAT WAS A CLERICAL ERROR DO TO
MY SECRETARY COMING IN VERY DRUNK AND NOT
BOTHERING TO CHECK WITH ME. THAT IS NOT
UNUSUAL IN THE HOLIDAY SEASON.
ALSO, I MAY HAVE CALLED YOU AT 2:49 IN THE

MORNING, YOUR TIME. SORRY, I WAS DRUNK
DIALING. THAT IS NOT UNUSUAL IN THE HOLIDAY
SEASON.
HOWEVER, I MUST HAVE THE PICTURES OF FRANCA

FOR MY FILE AND THE SIGNED POWER OF ATTORNEY
BEFORE I CAN TAKE THE NEXT STEP.
FONDLY, AND WITH GREAT PERSONAL AFFECTATION!

OFFICE TEL: 00221-778-355-784
MOBILE TEL: +221-704 -008-402
That triggered a response. I got this email from Franca:
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com>
Date: Tue, Dec 31, 2013 at 4:51 AM
Subject: DARLING REPLY ME
66
Darling the total money you send to the lawyer is how much?
please give me all the evidence of the payment slip because am
confused i have bot heard from the lawyer ever since you started
sending money to him please call me on phone +221-772-871-
564
My next question was where to go from here. I wasn’t going to

make a long distance call to wherever the hell she was, although I
didn’t mind pretending that I had. I started thinking through
strategies. I think my next move should be to send myself a receipt
from Diomansy Jones (not Diamansy Faye) from my
new barrister.diomansy@yahoo.com address. I figure $500 ought to be
enough. Then the next day I could "find" this message from Franca.
I'll forward it to Diomansy Jones.
Then after the weekend Diomansy will write Franca, telling her that he
knows who she is, that the dumbass whom she sought to scam screwed
up the email address and got his address instead, that he proceeded to
scam this particularly dumb target, that there's more money to be had,
that if she follows his advice he'll cut her in on it, or at least give her a
finder's fee, but if she doesn't do everything he says, he'll blow the
whistle.
Then I can have a lovely scammer fight between a real fake and a fake
fake.
Here’s how that worked out.
I wrote Franca:
From: Will Laquelle <will@rlhlawfirm.com>
Date: Thu, Jan 2, 2014 at 8:55 PM
Subject: Re: DARLING REPLY ME
My Dearest Franca:
67
I am disappointed that I did not get your email before paying the
lawyer's second bill. He told me he had tried to call you, but he
couldn't get you. He says he has talked to Sir Stephen.
It is costing us more since you have not signed the Power of

Attorney or provided the pictures he requested. I hope he calls
you soon.
I will forward you his email.
Love Forever,
Will
On the to-do list:

 Mock up a receipt
(Notice the picture of Lenin in the corner).
68
 Get a response from Dr. Jones:
From: Diamansy Jones <barrister.diomansy@yahoo.com>
Subject: Estate of Bahi
To: "will@rlhlawfirm.com" <will@rlhlawfirm.com>
DEAR MR. LAQUELLE:
ATTACHED IS A RECEIPT FOR PAYMENTS MADE.
I AM SORRY THAT THIS HAS PROVEN TO BE MORE

COMPLICATED THAN WE ORIGINALLY EXPECTED.
UNFORTUNATELY, THAT IS OFTEN THE CASE IN
MATTERS OF THIS NATURE.
I HAVE TRIED TO CALL YOUR FIANCEE BUT FOR SOME

REASON THE NUMBER IS NOT WORKING. THAT IS NOT
UNUSUAL IN OUR COUNTRY. THE TELEPHONE
SERVICE IS NOT AS FINE AS IT WAS WHEN I WAS A
STUDENT AT NEW HAMPSHIRE PACIFIC UNIVERSITY IN
THE UNITED STATES.
I APPRECIATE YOUR PROMPT PAYMENT OF MY BILLS.
DR. JONES, ESQ.

 Have Dr. Jones contact my beloved
Diamansy Jones
Jan 2, 2014
"FRANCA,"
I KNOW WHO YOU ARE. I KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON.

YOU ARE TRYING TO SCAM THIS FOOL OUT OF HIS
MONEY. HE HAS MONEY AND IS WILLING TO SPEND
69
IT. THE ONLY REASON YOU DO NOT HAVE SOME OF IT
RIGHT NOW IS THAT YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT THE
HELL YOU'RE DOING. YOU SHOULD LEAVE THIS
BUSINESS TO THOSE WHO KNOW IT. DON'T FUCK THIS
UP!
IT IS TRUE THAT YOU FOUND THIS SUCKER IN THE

FIRST PLACE, BUT HE MISTYPED THE LAWYER'S EMAIL
AND GOT ME. I HAVE BEEN STRINGING HIM ALONG
EVER SINCE. HE SEND ME $500 JUST A FEW DAYS AGO.
I PLAN TO GET MORE, AND IF YOU RUIN THIS FOR ME I
WILL MAKE LIFE VERY MISERABLE FOR YOU.
BE WARNED, HE IS VERY STUPID AND THINKS HE IS

VERY MUCH IN LOVE WITH YOU. SOMEHOW HE
MANAGED TO SEND ME ICELANDIC KRONA INSTEAD
OF DOLLARS. DO NOT WORRY, THEY CONVERT. THE
SECOND TIME HE MANAGED TO ACTUALLY SEND
DOLLARS. I WAS VERY IMPRESSED, BUT IT TOOK ME
TWO PHONE CALLS AND FIFTEEN EMAILS TO TELL HIM
HOW TO SEND IT RIGHT.
IF YOU DO THIS RIGHT YOU COULD GET QUITE A BIT

FROM HIM. I HAVE BEEN MAKING MONEY IN THIS
MANNER FOR QUITE SOME TIME, AND I COULD GIVE
YOU A FEW TIPS.
YOUR ENGLISH IS ATROCIOUS. THAT MEANS "VERY

BAD." IT IS OKAY WHEN YOU SEND MESSAGES AS A
POOR SEXY GIRL IN A REFUGEE CAMP. NOBODY
WOULD EXPECT YOUR ENGLISH TO BE GOOD.
BUT WHEN YOU SENT AN EMAIL SUPPOSEDLY FROM A

BANKER FROM THE UK AND IT LOOKED LIKE IT HAD
BEEN WRITTEN BY SOMEONE WHOSE FIFTH
70
LANGUAGE IS ENGLISH THAT WOULD WARN ALL BUT
THE STUPIDEST OF VICTIMS. FORTUNATELY FOR YOU,
YOU SEEM TO HAVE FOUND ONE OF THE STUPIDEST
OF VICTIMS.
TO DO THIS RIGHT, YOU MUST APPEAR TO COMPLY

WITH HIS REQUESTS.
SIGN THE STUPID POWER OF ATTORNEY HE SENT YOU

(I WROTE IT--IT IS OKAY, BUT IT WOULDN'T MATTER
WHAT IT SAID BECAUSE--UNLIKE ME--HE COULD
NEVER FIND YOU).
FIND SOME NAKED LADY PICTURES ON THE INTERNET

OF SOMEONE WHO LOOKS SORT OF LIKE THE
PICTURES YOU SENT AND SEND THEM TO HIM. THAT
IS UNLESS YOU ARE TOO FUCKING STUPID TO FIND
NAKED LADY PICTURES ON THE INTERNET. I'LL
SUPPLY SOME FOR A SMALL FEE.
TELL THIS IDIOT THAT YOU HAVE TALKED TO ME AND

ALL IS WELL. WE WILL COME UP WITH A GOOD
REASON FOR HIM TO SEND CASH TO YOU, BUT WE ARE
GOING TO HAVE TO WORK AT IT.
YOU GIVE MUGU A BAD NAME WITH YOUR

AMATEURISH SCAM. LEAVE IT TO SOMEONE WHO
KNOWS WHAT HE IS DOING.
DR. JONES
At this point the plot has to change. Lawyers aren’t
ordinarily known for being gullible or stupid, but Will was going
to have to get dumb. Fortunately for me, the scammers didn’t
recognize the change.
71
Then, of course, I have to get back in touch with Franca:
From: Will Laquelle <will@rlhlawfirm.com>
Subject: Re: Darling call me on phone i really like to speak with
you.because am confused +221-772-871-564
Baby:
I was really confused, too, but Dr. Jones explained it all to me.
He has been in contact with Sir Stephen. There are some legal
technicalities that we have to deal with.
I'm glad you found Dr. Jones to be our lawyer. He is very
conscientious and helpful. He's expensive, but all good lawyers
are.
Here's the way we have to do it.
1. You sign the Power of Attorney that he has prepared for us. It
is binding under Senegalese law. It's in French and everything.
You still have it, don't you?
2. I provide the Power of Attorney signed to you back to Dr.
Jones. He will then prepare some other documents. This
includes an Affidavit of Oath, a Mandate of Autopederasty, a Writ
of Testatum Fiere Facias Habeas Corpus Anwatta Corpus, and
a Diktikkle. He can have all of those documents ready and get
them certified by the High Court, but he needs the Power of
Attorney first, and he'll probably have a bunch of other
documents for you to sign. He filled out a Demande de marge de
crédit for me to sign and provide to a bank there in Senegal.
3. You provide the photographs Sir Stephen asked for. The
requirements were in his email to us. "Some photographs of
Franca so we can make sure it is her. Because of our
sophisticated computer recognition system, we need full frontal
nude pictures of her. This is to prevent fraud." It's kind of like
those passport photos with all the ticky requirements. Dr. Jones
72
will place a copy in his file, and will forward a copy to Sir
Stephen.
4. We already have the death certificate. I've sent it to you.
5. Dr. Jones would like a copy of the bank statement if you have
one. If not, he thinks Sir Stephen will waive the requirement.
We might have to give him a "gratuity" to get that done.
6. Then we have to get you out of Senegal to the United States.
Dr. Jones says he can start the process for a K-1 visa for you.
That's a fiancee visa, so you'll have to marry me. One of those
little legal technicalities. Dr. Jones gets visas for people. Those
can be expensive, but he can file them for us there in Senegal.
He also has a friend who has an airplane who can bring you here
once the Visa comes through. The price of the ticket is even less
than on Priceline (you know, the one with Captain Kirk and
Penny on the commercials).
Oh, I got a new phone, but it still doesn't have a plus sign on it.
There is a new number, too. Dr. Jones has tried to explain to me
how to make calls to your country, but somehow they never go
through. He calls me a lot, though.
I love you, and I can't wait to go through the entire The Joy of
Sex with you, particularly pages 37 through 39.
Will
Through January 9, 2014
CHAPTER 3
Will Laquelle: Attorney at Law
73
Meanwhile, if you are interested in the further adventures of Will
Laquelle—Scambaiter, check out our webpage,
http://runnelaquellehyde.weebly.com and www.bananaberry-
phlogiston.com. Much of the material in this book has already
appeared on those pages. In this book , the names have been
changed to protect the innocent. In this case the “innocent” is Will
Laquelle’s secret identity.
Frankly, it shouldn’t be terribly difficult to figure out Will Laquelle’s

secret identity, but I’m not terribly worried about anyone doing it.
So thank you for reading this short volume. I hope you have
enjoyed it at least half as much as I enjoyed writing it. Although
being realistic, I’m pretty sure you didn’t enjoy it quite that much.
74

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Scambaiting 2015 2d Ed

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Scambaiting for the Insane

What is the difference between a hobby and simply wasting time?

Dr. Motaung is a typical scammer. Below is Dr. Motaung’s

In a message dated 2/22/2004 2:02:36 PM Pacific Standard Time,

I write to seek your cooperation as my foreign partner and your

My names are1 Dr. Andrew Motaung. We are making this venture

If you will like to assist us as a partner, then indicate your interest

A swift acknowledgment on the receipt of this mail will be

Thank you and God bless you.

I, I mean we, respond:

Dear Dr. Motaung and Dr. Motaung:

So we compromised, which is not as easy as you would think it

So we, Will and Melvin, ask you to please respond promptly.

Dr. Motaung wasn’t interested in dealing with us further.

I enjoy getting into text conversations with scammers and

The Chibuzo incident began as a response I did entirely for fun. I

chibuzo njamar wrote:

FROM MR CHIBUZO NJAMA

I am contacting you believing you are a honest and trustworthy

Besides,I only got your address through the internet.

I am MR CHIBUZO NJAMA. Pam Head of Banking Operations,

The account has a net balance ofUS$28.9 million (TWENTY

Andreas, aBriton and manager of Petro-Technical Support Services.

All I want you to do is to collaborate with me by standing in as the

You may open a new account if you so wish.

I shall however provide you with directives on what to do as we

Contact me on my private telephone numbers above or through my

At the conclusion of this business, I shall travel to your country for

SORRY, YOUR EMAIL ACCOUNT HAS ALREADY BEEN

Chibuzo’s email illustrates some of the tricks used by

The scammer sends out hundreds of thousands, perhaps

My responses tend to be completely implausible. That

One would think that my response to this guy would be

chibuzom_2004exm2 (2:56:39 PM): hello

I later learned that there are large communities of scambaiters on

When instant messaging came out, I used it a lot. I used to keep a

aprilnetslut: hey, are you around?

Shameka: hey, are you around?

theolaschreiber884: Looking for a MAN not a boy!!

MSN Live Messenger Conversation.

A message from someone holding himself or herself out to be

I responded to Ms. Sery:

Date: Sat, 16 Nov 2013 12:52:52 -0600

She wrote back to me:

From: franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com> Mon, Nov 18,

Hoping to hear from you soonest,

She attached two pictures of an attractive young woman. My guess

Will Laquelle <will@rlhlawfirm.com> Mon, Nov 25, 2013 at 10:04

From Franca My Full Life Story with Love and Trust

franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com> Tue, Nov 26, 2013 at 6:23

I am more than happy in your reply to my mail this morning. How

Will Laquelle <will@rlhlawfirm.com> Thu, Dec 5, 2013 at 5:50 PM

6 Obviously, from the skillful way you use the language.

Franca asks me to contact the bank for the transfer.

HONEY PLEASE CONTACT THE BANK FOR THE

franca bahi <francabahi@hotmail.com> Mon, Dec 9, 2013 at 1:44

In short this place is more of a prison and my hope is for you to

THE ROYAL BANK OF SCOTLAND INTERNATIONAL

I will like you to contact this bank immediately on how to transfer

Dear Sir Stephen Hester,

Date: Thu, 5 Dec 2013 17:50:58 -0600

I modified it ever so slightly:

Will Laquelle <will@rlhlawfirm.com> Mon, Dec 23, 2013 at 7:08

Dear Sir Stephen Hester,