LipreTTo VOCAL Book ‘A Musical Comedy (Based on che novel “71/2 Cents” by Richard Bissell) Music and Lysies by Richard Adler and Jerry Ross Book by George Abbott and Richard Bissell ey Music THEATRE INTERNATIONAY NOTICE: DO NOT DEFACE! + Should you find it necessary to mark cues of cutsuse,soft black pencil only NOT FOR SALE + This book is rented for the period specified in you contrace. It remains the property of: MUSIC THEATRE INTERNATIONAL 421 West 54th Street New York, NY 10019 i Qh) 541-4684 Ss www.mtishoivs.com a - eyES RAEAT ae OVE ECZAN Ta BAOUOUKS A Musical Comedy (Based on the novel “7 Y2 Cents” by Richard Bissell) Music, and Lyrics by Richard Adler and Jerry Ross Book by George Abbott and Richard Bissell NOTICE: DO NOT DEFACE! + Should you find it necessary to mark cues or cuts, use a soft black lead pencil only. NOT FOR SALE * This book is rented for the period specified in your contract. It remains the property of Muste THearrE INTERNATIONAL 421 West 54th Street New York NY 10019 (212) 541-8656 Music THEATRE INTERNATIONAL Text copyright © 1954 by George Abbott and Richard Bissell. Renewed. Lyrics copyright © 1952, Copyright renewed 1980 by Richard Adler Music and J&J Ross Co. All Rights ReservedIn accordance with the terms and conditions specified in your perfor- mance license, all music, lyrics and dialogue contained herein are the property of the Authors and are fully protected by copyright You are not permitted to make any changes to the music, lyrics or dialogue of the Play, including the interpolation of new material and/or the exclusion of existing material, Any changes shall consti- tute a wilful infringement of said copyright and will subject you to all the criminal penalties and civil liabilities under the United States Copyright Act. This book may not be duplicated and must be returned at the conclu- sion of your production. This Play is the property of its Authors Remember, you have rented these materials and been granted a performance license. You may not duplicate any portion of these materials, disseminate them in any way, in whole or in part, including electronic or digital transmission and posting on the Internet, or use them for performances other than those specified in your license agreement. 421 West 54th Street New York NY 10019 (212) 541-8656 Music THEATRE INTERNATIONAL Music THEATRE INTERNATIONALed CHARACTERS (As they appear) HINES PREZ JOE HASLER GLADYS SID SOROKIN MABEL FIRST HELPER SECOND HELPER CHARLIE BABE WILLIAMS MAE BRENDA POOSIE SALESMAN, POP WORKER Dancers and Singers The action takes place in a small town in the Middle West. The present. (1954)yacere ced NUMBERS Acti Overture 1 1. The Pajarna Game ~ Opening ol 2. Racing With The Clock ae 3. A New Town Is A Blue Town... ae iB 4, Racing With The Clock — Reprise F eer Eek 5. Vm Not At All it LOVE w.soeenn oe : 20 6. tim Nof At Atl in Love - Scene Change. wr eee 28) 7. I'll Never Be Jealous Again. i pret aeeet ein 76, 8. Hey There. Pies neal eee eae 37 Or Her Is (Versed nr nace ereseee aca 41 9a, Her Is (Chorus) sess: ‘ . A 42 9b, Her Is (Dance) 43 9e. Sleep Tite 44 10. Once-a-Year Day (and Polka).. : Le 53 10a. Once-a-Year Day Crossover cote , 55 11. Her Is~ Reprise. tle 12, Small Talk... Rive tear: rts ree 62 12a, Not At All In Love Incidental... noe ite 70 13, There Once Was A Man (I Love You More) : Peal 14, Factory Music... 76 14a, Slow Down .. 77 14b, Factory Music. 78 15, Finale Act 1 (Hey There)... 79 Act 2 16, Enttr’ Act... ‘ preter et aaa eee o) 16a. Opening Act 2... . aa 80 17, Steam Heat eh RARE. 8d 17a, Small Talk Incidental 39 18, Hey There ~ Reprise 1 18a. Factory Music 92 19. Think of the Time I Save ... Berni Dh 20. Hernando’s Hideaway 109 20a. Hernando’s Hideaway Dance m0 20b, Hernando’s Hideaway Incidental . 114 21. I'l Never Be Jealous Again Ballet (Part 1) 119 21a, I'll Never Be Jealous Again Ballet (Part 2) 119 22, Hey There Incidental 122 23, Seven-and-a-Half Cent: 129 23a, Rush Music... 136 24. There Once Was a Man (I Love You More) Reprise A 137 25. The Pajama Game Closing 4 fiend? 25a. Seven-and-a-Half Cents Reprise. 141 <=ONGS BY CHARACTER siD 3. A New Town Is a Blue Town 8, Hey There... 10. Once-a-Year Day. 12, Small Talk 13, There Once Was A Man (I Love You More) 24. There Once Was a Man (1 Love You More) Reprise... 25, The Pajama Game Closing 250, Seven-and-a-Half Reprise BABE 5. I’m Not At All In Love ... 10, Once-a-Year Day. 12. Small Talk 13. There Once Was A Man (I Love You More) 18. Hey There ~ Reprise 23. Seven-and-a-Half Cents 24, There Once Was a Man (1 Love You More) Reprise 25, The Pajama Game Closing... 25a, Seven-and-a-Half Reprise HINES 1. The Pajama Game Opening 7. I'll Never Be Jealous Again 19. Think of the Time I Save ... 25. The Pajama Game Closing 25a, Seven-and-a-Half Reprise GLADYS 9. Her Is (Verse) 9a, Her Is (Chorus) 9b, Her Is (Dance) .. 17, Steam Heat... 20, Hernando’s Hidemoay ... 25. The Pajama Game Closing 25a, Seven-and-a-Half Reprise 71 cg 139 141 137 139 141 28 194 139 oD 41 a2 ol 81 109 139 141 PREZ 9, Her Is (Verse) 9a, Her Is (Chorus). 9b. Her Is (Dance) Il. Her Is — Reprise. 23, Seven-and-a-Half Cents . 25. The Pajama Game Closing. 25a, Seven-and-a-Half Reprise MABEL, 7. I'll Never Be Jealous Again 25, The Pajama Game Closing. 25a, Seven-and-a-Half Reprise MAE 11. Her Is—Reprise. 25, The Pajama Game Closing. 25a, Seven-and-a-Half Reprise... HORUS 2. Racing With The Clock 4, Racing With The Clock — Reprise er 5. I'm Not At All In Love 9c. Sleep Tite 10. Once-a-Year Day. 10a. Once-a-Year Day Crossover. 14a, Slow Down.... 17. Steam Heat 19. Think of the Time I Save .. 20a, Hernando’s Hideaway Dance 23. Seven-and-a-Half Cents 25. The Pajama Game Closing. 25a, Seven-and-a-Half Reprise 41 42 oo 57 129 139 141 28 139) 141 57 20139 141 abel 129 139 141LOTE: ‘The knives are not actually thrown; Hines only pretends to throw them. They actually pop out from behind the board as they are released by the operator who stands behind. ‘The board is 3-sided, like a screen. The operator stands behind and releases each knife as Hines pretends to throw. There should be a hole for the operator to peep through to watch Hines. There should also be a hole for each knife to be thrown. Behind each knife is a carriage with a slot in which the knife rests and which carries the knife when released. The knife point is embedded in a wooden block which stops the knife from going all the way out the hole. The knife is held back by a lever and is mounted on a spring. When the lever is pulled by the operator, the spring causes the kknife to travel along the carriage and out the hole. This happens so quickly, due to the action of the spring, that the knife appears to have been thrown.THe Pajama Game ACT 14 Scene 1 (HINES enters from R. dancing to musical vamp. Crosses to LC and then to C) ee eee eee Gi HINES This is a very serious drama, It’s kind of a problem play. It’s about Capital and Labor, I wouldn't bother to make such a point of all this except later an if you happen to ... (Cr s RC) see a lot of naked women being chased through the woods, I don’t want you to get the wrong impression. (Crosses C) This play is full of symboli Cedar Rapids, Iowa. . I work in the Sleep Tite Pajama Factory in (HE dances — struts... then sings:) (Crosses RO) THE PAJAMA GAME IS THE GAME I’M IN AND I'M PROUD TO BE (Crosses C) IN THE PAJAMA GAME, [LOVE IT I CAN HARDLY WAIT TO WAKE, (RC) AND GET TO WORK AT EIGHT. NOTHING'S QUITE THE SAME AS THE PAJAMA GAME, I'm an executive. (Crosses L) I'ma Time Study man.= THe PAJAMA Game (HINES) (Crosses C) I can tell you per second exactly how many stitches go into a pair of pajamas. can time anything. You'll see when we get down to the factory. (Crosses far R) (Takes out watch) All right. Let her go! (HINES taps rhythin with his foot) (Traveler opens on THE SHOP) Scene 2 (THE SHOP Double row of sewing machines LC. Window seat R. HINES Crosses to USC at end of sewing machines. HE looks at his watch) (HINES) Allright, girls. Hurry up! (Crosses DO)s T've got my stop watch on you, Now watch for the symbolism. (HE looks off L) Look out. Here comes the President of the Union. Boy, he's sharp. (Crosses DL) He knows what's going on around here. (PREZ enters from DL, crosses’s to RC, speaks to ALVAREZ at machine) PREZ Hey, I lost my lunch bucket. Anybody see my lunch bucket? HINES I told you he was sharp. (PREZ crosses to window seat R, where TWO GIRLS are standing by the window, HE goes up behind them and tickles MARTIN. MARTIN giggles) PREZ Her is the cutest one. (Crosses DR) HINES (To audience) He's relaxing, but there's another side to his character.1 Tne PAJAMA GAME (JOE, « factory worker, enters DR and crosses to PREZ) JOE How about it Prez? PREZ (To JOE) I we don’t get a seven-and-a-half cent raise by the first of the month, we strike! JOE You said it! PREZ ‘You said it! (ALL GIRLS nod agreement. JOE and PREZ exit DR) HINES (Crossing back fo R) See how ideas keep creeping through? That takes the sting off the sexy parts. Oh, look out. Here comes my boss, Mr. Hasler. (HE looks off UR) There's capital for you. Capital with a capital C. He's a great economist (HASLER has entered from UR, crosses to ALVAREZ at machine. Picks up scrap of ‘material from cable, hands it to her, saying:) HASLER Waste, waste, wastel!! (ALVAREZ dissolves into tears. HASLER crosses DLC ~ RODRIGUEZ enters DL HASLER shouts at him) Turn off those damn lights! (RODRIGUEZ runs off DL. HASLER crosses DC) Do you think J. P. Morgan got rich leaving lights burning all over Wall Street? (Turns US) Where's my secretary? Gladys! (GLADYS enters from UR. Crosses’s to DC) GLADYS Yes, Mr. Hasler? HINES (Crosses back to Gladys) Love her. I love her.‘ Tne PajaMa GAME HASLER here’s the new superintendent? GLADYS ecan't find him. (Looks off L) sre’s Mabel ... she'll know. (MABEL enters from DL. Crosses’s to HASLER) ASLER (To MABEL) here's Sorokin? MABEL e’s around the plant somewhere, Mr. Hasler, First there was a leak in the water wer, then he went down to the boiler room. HASLER all, go find him. MABEL *s, Mr. Hasler, (MABEL exits UR) HASLER (Starts off DL) ladys. Take a letter. GLADYS (Follows, writing) os sir HASLER (Crossing L. ALL GIRLS listen) vard of Directors: Employees’ demand for seven and a half cents raise absolutely necessary, (ALL GIRLS react) ines! HINES 2s sir! HASLER eep things goin’ (Exits with GLADYS)THE Pajama Game a HINES Okay, chief. (Crosses to SC by the machines and takes out his stop watch, HE taps the rhythm) Hurry up, girls. Can't waste time! (Crosses DC) I've got my stop watch on you. (Crosses L) Hurry up! Hurry up! (Exits L) GIRLS 1 GIRLS 2 HURRY UP, HURRY UP. CAN'T WASTE TIME, CAN'T WASTE TIME, ITS ALOSING RAC WHEN YOU'RE RACING WITH THE, RACING WITH THE, RACING WITH THE CLOCK RACING WITH THE CLOCK (HINES enters rom DL and crosses to DR and exits saying:) HINES Hurry up, girls. Seconds are ticking. Seconds are ticking. Hurry up.iS Tue Payama Game GIRLS 1 GIRLS 2 HURRY UP, HURRY UP, CAN'T WASTE TIME, HURRY UP, HURRY UP. CAN'T WASTE TIME, WHEN YOU'RE RACING WITH THE CLOCK, CAN'T WASTE TIME, WHEN YOU'RE RACING WITH THE CLOCK, CAN'T WASTE TIME, AND THE SECOND HAND DOESN'T UNDERSTAND, CAN'T WASTE TIME, ‘THAT YOUR BACK MAY BREAK AND CAN'T WASTE TIME. YOUR FINGERS ACHE, AND YOUR CONSTITUTION ISN'T AND YOUR CONSTITUTION ISN'T MADE OF ROCK. MADE OF ROCK. CAN'T WASTE TIME, IT'S A LOSING RACE WHEN YOU'RE RACING WITH THE, CAN'T WASTE TIME. RACING WITH THE, RACING WITH THE CLOCK. 1ST MALE (Cros 2s L to C, sings to SARA, gives her pajamas) WHEN WILL OLD MAN HASLER BREAK DOWN AND COME UP WITH OUR SEVEN-AND-A-HALF CENT RAISE? (Exits DR) 2ND MALE (Crosses UR to C, sings to AUGIE, examines patterns) HOW IN HELL CAN I BUY ME ASWELL NEW SECOND HAND CAR ON THAT SALARY HE PAYS? 1ST GIRL: (Puts pajamas in PETE'S box) WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE NEW SUPERINTENDENT? 2ND GIRL (Spoken) HE'S CUTE, 3RD GIRL (Spoken) HE’LL NEVER LAST. (Throws pajamas to CARMEN, who fitrozs therm to RITA); 5 : : : ecu ba Ue iii cal btili if THE PAJAMA GAME RITA (Sings) HE'S KIND OF FRESH FOR A NEW SUPERINTENDENT, BRENDA (Spoken) ILIKE A MAN WITH SPUNK. VIRGINIA YOU LIKE A MAN PERIOD. (ALL GIRLS laugh) (HINES enters from UR, crosses DC to exit DR) HINES All right, girls. Cut out the laughing. Tempus fugit. Tempus fugit. (HINES exits DR) GIRLS (imitating him) Waste — waste — wastel!! HINES (Sticking his head back DR) Hurry up. (HE exits DR) GIRLS 1 GIRLS 2 HURRY UP, HURRY UP. i HURRY UP. CAN'T WASTE TIME, CAN'T WASTE TIME, CAN'T WASTE TIME, HURRY UP, HURRY UP. CAN'T WASTE TIME, HURRY UP. CAN'T WASTE TIME, CAN'T WASTE TIME. AND YOUR CONSTITUTION ISN'T MADE OF ROCK. AND YOUR CONSTITUTION ISN'T MADE OF ROCK. MEN WHEN YOU'RE RACING WITH THE CLOCK, WHEN YOU'RE RACING WITH THE CLOCK. AND THE SECOND HAND DOESN'T UNDERSTAND, THAT YOUR BACK MAY BREAK AND YOUR FINGERS ACHE, AND YOUR CONSTITUTION ISN’T MADE OF ROCK.ie THE PAJAMA GAME (GIRLS 1) (GIRLS 2) (MEN) IT'S ALOSING RACE HURRY UP, CAN'T WASTE TIME, WHEN YOU'RE RACING WITH THE, HURRY UP. CAN'T WASTE TIME. RACING WITH THE, RACING WITH THE CLOCK ALL CAN'T WASTE TIME. RAG-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING, RAC-ING WITH THE CLOCK, (GONGS are heard at close of number following applause, THE CROWD breaks up as they go to lunch ad libbing) MARA Lunch! Hey, Mary, you going to the cafeteria? MARY Vl meet you there. MARA Swell (THE GIRLS exit Land R) (SID enters from UL with CHARLEY, followed by the TWO HELPERS. SID and CHARLEY cross to first DS machine. The TWO HELPERS cross to stage DRC) 1 sID We can fix this while they’re at lunch. No, no, it’s number 9. (Kneels at #9 machine) CHARLEY Here you are. (Hands SID plie sID Thanks. FIRST HELPER (Kneeling at tool box RC with SECOND HELPER) This new super won't last. A Chicago guy.Tue Pajama Game ‘neem enema ei Anatht hia Ne stein acii SECOND HELPER He don’t belong in this town. FIRST HELPER The whole second floor was broke down and they couldn't find him ... he was fixing a boiler and then he yells at me. I don’t stand for that, (SID rises, gives pliers back to CHARLEY and piece of cable) ‘There's plenty of other places I can work. I don’t have to take that crap off nobody. sID (To FIRST HELPER) Give me a screw driver. FIRST HELPER (Slowly gets tool) ‘You know what they're paying at the packing plant, Ninety-three up. That ain't hay neither. (MABEL enters from UR) sID Screw driver! (HELPER rises, throws tool to SID, and kneels again. MABEL crosses to Sid) MABEL Oh, Mr. Sorokin. sID Yes, Mabel? MABEL Mr, Hasler’s gone to the shipping room. He wants you right away. sID T've got to finish this. I can’t ... MABEL Yes, I know. (Crosses L of SID) Mr. Hasler’s kind of difficult sometimes. (Stops LC) You're the third superintendent we've had this year. sID And I'm the last one you'll have this year, Mabel, cause I want this job.10 ~ The Pajama Game FIRST HELPER (To SECOND HELPER ~ sotto voce) Oh, you don't say, (Crossing far L) MABEL Now you're talking, boy. SID (To HELPER) Bring me a switch, MABEL (Stops) 111 tell him you're awful busy. SID Thanks, (MABEL exits DL) FIRST HELPER (To SECOND HELPER) And let me tell you something else. They're paying eighty-four up at the casket company, sID (Crossing down to FIRST HELPER, who rises also. SECOND HELPER rises, crosses US to steps) My gosh, you'd bea sensation up at the casket company. Maybe you could get a job 9s a tester and just lie around in coffins all day long, Now hurry it up. FIRST HELPER Tm hurrying, sID Well, hurry faster, (SID pushes him. THE FIRST HELPER spravols on floor DR) FIRST HELPER (On floor) Hey, you can’t do that to me.iii seiipecs ceases tannins ont Us Aaa ae td THe Pajama Game 11 sID (Finding switch in tool box) ‘The hell I can't. I just did. (HE crosses back up to CHARLEY and specks to hr) Got the screws? (Kneels at machine) FIRST HELPER (Rises) Well, I'll fix you. (HE crosses to R of SID. SECOND HELPER crosses D to tool box) I'm getting the Grievance Committee. sID (From under machine) Go get them. It'll give you something to do. FIRST HELPER I don’t have to take that crap off nobody. sID (Rising from machine and facing him. FIRST HELPER steps back) Go away ... boy ... you bother me. FIRST HELPER Tl show you (Crosses DL holding arm) on my weak arm too. (HELPER exits DL) CHARLEY That Grievance Committee can start quite a rhubarb, sID The whole town’s a rhubarb. CHARLEY You'll get used to it, sip Thope so. We've got to have a larger switch and we'll need a fuse. CHARLEY Til go down to the storehouse. (HE exits DL)12 = THe Pajama Game sID (To SECOND HELPER) Give him a hand (HELPER starts out L slowly ~ as HE passes SID:) Movel! (HELPER rushes off DL) (SID turns US = slaps fuse on table, Crosses R to window) sID ANEW TOWN, IS A BLUE TOWN, (Looking out windows) “WHO DO YOU KNOW” AND “SHOW ME WHAT YOU CAN DO” TOWN. THERE'S NO RED CARPET AT YOUR FFET (Crosses C) IF YOU'RE NOT TOUGH THEY'LL TRY TO BEAT YOU DOWN, (Stepping RC) IN A NEW BLUE TOWN (Sits in chair C) THE OLD TOWN, 17'S NOT LIKE THE OLD TOWN YOU DON'T TAKE LONG TO FIND THAT YOU'RE IN A COLD TOWN. BUT YOU KNOW YOU CAN LICK IT DIDN'T BUY A ROUND TRIP TICKET TO THIS (Rises ~ crosses C — hands in pockets — cross DSC) COLD, COLD NEW BLUE TOWN WELL NOBODY ASKED ME TO COME HERE, AND NOBODY ASKED ME TO STAY MADE UP MY OWN MIND AND I KNOW THAT I'LL FIND MY OWN WAY. (Crosses LC — hands out of pockets) SINCE THAT FIRST DAY WHEN I SAID “HI” TOWN,THE Pasama Game ss 13 s Sarat ‘rataeaseunmn guano ieee ee ic cates Herat cmon meson tc (SID) (Steps C) THEY'VE DAMNED WELL TRIED TO MAKE ME SAY “GOODBYE TOWN.” BUT I WON'T LEAVE UNTIL I MAKE IT MY TOWN THEY'LL SEE. (Put screw driver in box) THIS ONE-HORSE, TWO-BIT HICK OF A NEW TOWN, AIN'T GONNA LICK ME. (HINES enters from DL followed by HASLER and GLADYS) HINES Mr. Hasler’s looking for you! (Crosses to behiind fool box) HASLER (Crosses to SID) Did you get lost? sID Thad to fix the number nine machine. HASLER expected you in the shipping room. (HASLER crosses US to machines. GLADYS crosses to SID and pats his arm) GLADYS Don't pay any attention to him, Sid. SID Thanks. (SID crosses to #9 machine and kneels. GLADYS crosses R past HINES, HINES grabs her R arm) HINES When did you get so familiar with him ... Sid, what does that mean? GLADYS It doesn’t mean anything, I just like to be friendly. HINES Friendly? You're always flirting. GLADYS Qoooooh!!! (SHE exits DR)as THE PayaMa Game HINES (Follows) Dancing on the green! Juke boxes! (HE exits DR) HASLER (Crosses D to SID, SID rises) After this, when I send for you I'll expect you. That's the way we run things around here, (HASLER exits UR. SID follows a step, then crosses DC) sID SINCE THAT FIRST DAY WHEN I SAID “HI TOWN,” (Crosses DC) THEY'VE DAMNED WELL TRIED TO MAKE ME SAY “GOODBYE TOWN.” BUT I WON'T LEAVE UNTIL I MAKE IT MY TOWN, ‘THEY'LL SEE. ‘THIS ONE-HORSE TWO-BIT HICK OF A NEW TOWN, AIN'T GONNA LICK ME, (After number SID turns US, kneels at machine. CHARLEY and MABEL enter from DL. CHARLEY crosses to machine, R of SID, MABEL crosses to SID‘s left) MABEL Mr. Sorokin! I told you to be careful. When I heard about your beating up that boy sID (Looking up) I didn't beat him up. MABEL He's dangling his arm like it was hurt terrible. sID Let him take it up with the committee CHARLEY He's doing that, don’t worry. Here comes Babe Williams. sID Tl be delighted to talk to him. (MABEL crosses R ~ watches. FIRST HELPER enters from DL followed by BABE, BRENDA, MAE, and SECOND HELPER. THEY all cross to C)THE PajAMA Game en ee Ca AM deat RAR De a aN SL a FIRST HELPER All right, Mister. Here’s the Grievance Committee. SID (Rises — crosses DC. Sees that the committee consists of BABE) Oh, is this the Committee? BABE ‘That's right, Mr. Sorokin. This is the committee. sID (Turning to CHARLEY) Charley, this Grievance Committee is different BABE Never mind the snow job. SID (Turns to her) Ym sorry. Alll right ... Look, I shoved the kid. What's the next move? BABE He says you hit him, sID No, Ijust... (Starts to illustrate, right hand in pushing position toward BABE, stops short) ‘Look, Miss Wilson ... I've got a quite a few problem on my ... MAE Her name is Miss Williams. BABE What's the difference? sID Oh, I'm sorry Miss Williams. BABE It doesn’t matter. MAE Well, he ought to know the Committee's right name. BABE Take it easy, Look, Mr. Sorokin, [have quite a few problem of my own right now. This helper says you socked him.16 - Tue PAJAMA GAME sID He does? FIRST HELPER Yes, Ido. sID Let's say I shoved him. It sounds more refined. (HINES enters UR, crosses to SID) HINES Mr. Sorokin, Mr. Hasler wants to see you in his office right away SID (Turns to him) Tell him to ... Tell him okay. HINES This is a crisis, The tops are fifteen minutes behind the bottoms. (HINES crosses DR to MABEL) sID (To BABE) Let's be practical. This is a lot of damned nonsense. BABE We don’t happen to think so, Mr. Sorokin. You're not supposed to strike an employee. We have rules about that. sID I know, For both sides, I hope. Listen, Miss Williams, 'l spread it on the table. This young man needs vocational guidance. BABE You think so? SID He wants to be a Bank President. [ don’t believe he's happy as a factory helper MAE I don’t see what all this has to do with it. BABE (fo MAB) Forget itTHE PAJAMA Game (BABE) (Crosses to FIRST HELPER) ‘Well, it seems you haven't made a very good impression on our new superintendent. FIRST HELPER He ain’t got no right to push me around, Especially on my weak arm. (SOUND: GONG GONG GONG. THE WORKERS begin entering R ard L. BABE crosses R to SID) sID Look, Miss Williams. I've got to get this factory going. Can’t we take this up later? BABE Of course we can, Mr. Sorokin. That's in the rule book too, (SID crosses U to machine #9. BABE crosses L to HELPER and marches lim RC. ‘To HELPER:) Go tell the nurse to check your arm ... then send me a report. (SECOND HELPER picks up box of tools — carries them off L) FIRST HELPER (Crosses to R) Can‘t shove me around. It was broke once already. (Exits R. BABE starts back C. CHARLEY picks up tools, exits 1) sID (Stepping DS) Thanks for your cooperation, Miss Williams, BABE I's all in the rule book. sID I must read that rule book sometime. BABE You certainly should. (SHE erosses to L as if to go — SID’5 next spreech stops her) sID All [have to say is that you're the cutest Grievance Committee I ever had to deal with. (HE exits UR with MABEL. BABE exits DL. GONG: 9 times. THE GIRLS resume their work) oeea THE PAJAMA Game HINES (Crosses C) All right, girls, Hurry up. I've got my stop watch on you. (Stands by #9 machine) Fane GIRLS (Singing) WHEN YOU'RE RACING WITH THE CLOCK, WHEN YOU'RE RACING WITH THE CLOCK AND THE SECOND HAND DOESN'T UNDERSTAND, (HINES starts tapping increased tempo) THAT YOUR BACK MAY BREAK AND YOUR FINGERS ACHE AND YOUR CONSTITUTION ISN’T MADE OF ROCK. (Repeat) IT'S A LOSING RACE WHEN YOU'RE RACING WITH THE, RACING WITH THE, RACING WITH THE CLOCK. (ELEVATOR DROPS, comes in, lights change) Scene 3 (THE HALLWAY ELEVATOR DROP. As lights come up on scene, PREZ and JOE enter from DL) PREZ (Crossing to LC) You elected me president, you've got to have confidence in me. JOE (AtLO) But I only said PREZ (Stops) Look, this is no time to be talking about no ultimatums and no strikes. JOE Yes, but that seven-and-a-half centsTHE Pajama Game 19 PREZ Wait a minute ... there ain’t no question but we're going to get that seven-and-a-half cents raise, other companies are paying it and we're entitled to it, but we got to be smart, Wait till old Hasler’s got so many orders in, he can’t afford to shut the factory down. Then we got him. JOE You bet. (PREZ taps JOE playfully — crosses DR. COLLEEN, ANN, VIRGINIA, MAE, POOPSIE, and BABE enter DR, cross to C. DORIS, MARY and CHARLENE enter SL, cross to ELEVATOR) MAE Well, I wouldn’t want no super to try and shove me around. POOPSIE Hi a, Prez. (BRENDA, SANDRA and SARA enter SR) PREZ (Crosses to BABE) Hello. Say Babe, what about that kid that got hit? What'd the super have to say for himself? (MARA, CARMEN and LYNDA enter SR with cart) BABE ‘That's one for the birds, Prez. That kid hasn't even got a bruise on his arm. He's a faker, PREZ You think so, huh, Babe? BABE Sure, he’s a phony. If that guy Sorokin ever really hit him held break him in two. PREZ Okay. (PREZ crosses below BABE antd exits DR) POOPSIE (sc) Mr. Sorokin is s-0-0-0-0 strong ... SARA He's so wonderful20 - THe Pajama Game BABE (Looking from one to the other) What's this? POOPSIE (Steps to BABE RC) The new Super. I think he’s simply woo-woo, don’t you? BABE I didn’t notice. POOPSIE I noticed. MARA I thought Babe was noticin’ too. BRENDA Yeah ... she lit up. BABE You girls are getting BRENDA Love comes at last to Babe Williams. BABE (Crossing R) Oh, get off it! Thardly looked at the man. I’m the Grievance Committee, Love ~ are you nuts? Ler Cee ee (iets POOPSIE Some people can’t tell when it hits them... (GIRLS ~ gossiping) BABE Bah! (From far R, in front of truck — sings:) ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS SAY “HELLO” TO A MAN, AND THEY'VE GOT YOU WHISPERING IN HIS EAR ALL YOU GOTTA DO 1S BE POLITE WITH HIM, AND THEY'VE GOT YOU SPENDING THE NIGHT WITH HIM,THE PAJAMA Game 21 (BABE) IF THERE'S A GUY YOU MERELY HAVE A BEER WITH, THEY'VE GOT YOU SETTING THE WEDDING DATE. IT SEEMS THEY'VE JUST GOT TO HAVE SOME DIRT (GIRLS turn to listen to Babe) TO BEND YOUR EAR WITH SO BEFORE YOU START, I HEREWITH STATE: (Leans on truck) I’M NOT AT ALLIN LOVE, NOT AT ALL IN LOVE, NOT NOT A BIT, NOT A MITE. (Sits om truck RC) THOUGH I'LL ADMIT HE'S QUITE A HUNK OF GUY, BUT HE'S NOT MY CUP OF TEA, NOT MY CUP OF TEA, NOT HE. NOT AN OUNCE, NOT A PINCH, HE'S JUST AN INCH TOO SURE OF HIMSELF FOR ME. (BABE tums back on GIRLS, puts feet up on truck) BRENDA WELL, OF COURSE YOU'VE NOTICED HIS MANLY PHYSIQUE AND THAT LOOK IN HIS EYES. SAY I'M SURE HE CAN CUT MOST ANY MAN DOWN T0 SIZE VIRGINIA HE MUST BE AS FIERCE AS A TIGER WHEN HE'S MAD. POOPSIE AND I'LL BET HE CRIES LIKE A LITTLE BOY WHEN HE'S SAD. BABE (Crosses to DL) BUT I'M NOT AT ALL IN LOVE, NOT AT ALL IN LOVE, NOT I. NOT A STRAW, NOT A HAIR, I DON'T CARE IF HE'S AS STRONG AS A LION, (Back to C) OR IF HE HAS THE REST OF YOU SIGHIN’ YOU MAY BE SOLD, (Crosses back fo DRC) BUT THIS GIRL AIN'T BUYIN’ (Crosses to truck — sits om it)THE Pajama Game (BABE) 1M NOT AT ALLIN LOVE. (Sits, CARMEN wheels her towards C) GIRLS SHE'S NOT AT ALL IN LOVE, NOT AT ALL IN LOVE, OH No! BABE NOT A PIN, NOT A CRUMB, GIRLS MUST BE THE SUMMER HEAT THAT GIVES HER THAT GLOw, (Wheeling her LC) ‘CAUSE SHE'S NOT AT ALL IN LOVE, NOT AT ALL IN LOVE, SHE CRIES. BABE NOT A SNIP, NOT A BITE, GIRLS MUST BE THE LIGHT FROM ‘THE CEILING SHINING HERE IN HER EYES. (ANN mimics debonair man with mustache) HE'S YOUNG AND HANDSOME AND SMART AND WE CAN'T GET OVER ay, (Jabs MAE playfilly — MAE squeals) BABE BUT THIS LADY'S HEART HE DOESN'T AFFECT 4 BIT. GIRLS (Wheeling her far R) IT’S EASY TO SEE THAT HER DAFFY GRIN IS THE GRIN SHE ALWAYS WEARS, AND SHE'S BREATHLESS BECAUSE SHE RAN UP A FLIGHT OF STAIRS (Elevator door opens ~ THEY push BABE in cart across to L ) ONE VOICE Obviously! THREE VOICES Naturally!THE Pajama GAME ES ALL VOICES Certainly! (Bump) sID Excuse me. BABE ‘Scuse me. (BABE falls off cart into SID's arms as HE comes out of elecator, followed by CHARLEY who exits DL) SID (Crosses to R of her) I'm sorry, (HE crosses from L to R past the line of GIRLS who all stare, and exits DR) BRENDA Obviously! POOPSIE Naturally! VIRGINIA Certainly! ALL VOICES Ha! GIRLS SHE'S NOT AT ALL IN LOVE, NOT AT ALL IN LOVE, NOT SHE. BABE NO, I'M NOT. GIRLS NOT A DOT. BABE NOT A TOUCH. GIRLS NO, NOT MUCH. BABE WHEN I FALLIN LOVE THERE'LL BE NO DOUBT ABOUT IT, ‘CAUSE YOU WILL KNOW FROM THE WAY THAT I SHOUT IT:22> THE Pajama Game GIRLS (Quietly, Lean forward — hands on knees) (Spoken) YOU'RE SHOUTING! BABE (Quietly) I HAVEN'T FALLEN GIRLS SHE HASN'T FALLEN, BABE (Stamps foot) I'M NOT AT ALL IN LOVE GIRLS S$ NOT AT ALL IN LOVE. ma (Some GIRLS wheel BABE, sitting in cart, of L. OTHERS exit off R) (DIMOUT DROP FLIES) Scene 4 (THE OFFICE There are too desks and two entrances. MABEL sits at her SL. de GLADYS enters typing. L carrying a big ledger) GLADYS (Crosses to R desk) Got those figures for Mr. Hasler? MABEL (Still typing) They're in the file. GLADYS (Crosses C) Where's your boss?Tne PajAMA Game 25 MABEL On the first floor. A couple of the girls had a fight. (The Phone rings. GLADYS sees there is no further conversation and goes out UL. MABEL answers phone) (MABEL) Superintendent's office — yes, Sid — Dolores Paradiso, that's her name. She's supposed to be very elegant. She can sew a button ona fly like she was pouring tea for the Queen of England. (KNOCK on door) Come! (POOPSIE enters R. Crosses LC) Oh, yes, she can pull hair all right! (Hangs up. Turns to POOPSIE) Them girls spoiled a piece of goods. When Mr. Hasler finds that out, there'll be blood all over the place. POOPsIE Wanta buy a ticket for the picnic? MABEL (Gets purse from desk drawer) Might as well get it over with. POOPSIE One dollar. And all the beer you can guzzle. i: MABEL, (Busy emptying purse on desk to,fied a dollar) No beer for me. It gives me the heartburn something awful. (HINES enters R) HINES Me too. MABEL You! (HINES crosses DI. of MABEL's desk) POOPSIE You gonna do your knife throwing act this year, Mr. Hines? HINES suppose so,THE Pajama Game (GLADYS enters L, crosses to desk R with ledger and note) (HINES) There always seems to be a demand for it, POOPSIE Was you honest on the real stage? GLADYS That's where I first met him, Pi ‘Sopsie. He was throwing knives at a woman at the Majestic Theatre. (Puts ledger down on desk) Poopsig Is Mr. Hasler in his office? GLADYS No, (Crosses to R of desk) MABEL (Handing money) Here, One hard eared dollar, and [hope the ham ain’t as sal the last union picnic. L was dried up for a week after POOPSIE ty as it was at the for Thanks, (Exits R. GLADYS has put note on SID's desk HINES watches it suspiciously, HE becomes tense) HINES (Crosses to LC from far L) What're you going — leaving him a note? Huh? (GLADYS gives him a dirty took) Carrying on with Sorokin, huh? GLADYS dh, Vernon! (Turns her head acoay from him) HINES Saw you leave that note on his desk. I'm not blind. (MABEL turns and listens) hat's why you wore that low neck dress to work today.THe PAJAMA GAME — 27 GLADYS (Tums to him, SHE has on a very modest dress) You make me scream, Vernon — you just make me scream. HINES (Crossing to desk) Allright, then, what's in it? I dare you to tell me what's in it, GLADYS (Grabs note and hands it to him) Read it, then go cut your throat. HINES (Takes note. Reads) “Okay payroll seven thousand five hundred and two dollars and one cent.” GLADYS That means I love you in the Morse code. a MABEL Ain‘t you ashamed of yourself, Heinzie? (HINES hangs head) GLADYS (Crossing to door L) Now that we got that all settled, (Turns at door L) do you think you could trust me as far as the ladies’ room? HINES (Crosses to chair L of desk R, sits) I'll never be jealous again, Mabel — never. GLADYS (Comes back suddenly) Maybe Il give you cause some day. (Exits) MABEL (She rises. Turns chair DS for number. Crosses’s to ULC to window — looks out) Oh, Heinzie, Heinzie.ai = THE Pajama Game MABEL (Crosses DS — speaks:) That's the stuff, Heinzie, You're practically cured! HINES (Puts arm around her) THERE WILL BE NO MORE NIGHTMARES TO SLEEP THROUGH, NO MORE KEYHOLES 10 PEEP THROUGH, MABEL NO MORE BUSHES TO CREEP THROUGH! HINES (Steps R) THAT'S MY PLAN. MABEL (From his L — standing Cs) WELL NOW THAT YOU'RE A NEW MAN— PICTURE THIS: (HINES crosses back RC fo MABEL) YOU GO INTO YOUR SWEETIE'S APARTMENT, YOU BORROWED THE KEYS, HINES THERE I AM, 1GO TO My SWEETIE’S APARTMI ENT, 1 BORROWED THE KEYS, MABEL THERE SHE IS, SHE'S GIVING A SAILOR A VERY AFFECTIONATE SQUEEZE. HINES THERE SHE IS, SHE'S GIVING A SAILOR A VERY AFFECTIONATE SQUEEZE MABEL THEN, TO BOOT, SHE TELLS YOU SHE WAS IN THE ARMS OF HER COUSIN WHO'S BACK FROM OVERSEAS. HINES Her cousin! Back from overseas? Do you expect me to believe that? MABEL (Steps away — fooks at him sternly points ~ speaks) Heinzie!THE Pajama GAME HINES I WOULD TRUST HER, I WOULD TRUST HER. BY GEORGE, I SWEAR I WOULD TRUST HER NO I'LL NEVER BE JEALOUS, I'LL NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER BE JEALOUS AGAIN. (THEY go into soft shoe dance. HE whirls her and seats her at desk L, end of dance, then exits UR) (HASLER aud SID enter. SID crosses to his desk, looks at paper) HASLER (Crossing to MABEL at desk L) What right has the Union to run their Coca-Cola machine with our electricity? (Crosses C) It’s just as Fulton Lewis, Jr. said last night. (Breaks off suddenly. Turns to SID) Do you listen to Fulton Lewis, Jr, Sorokin? sID Well, I'm rather flexible in the matter. HASLER (Crosses to SID’s desk) Say, has he got their number — keen mind — one of the greatest thinkers in the country today. Should listen to him every night. It ought to be in every executive's contract (Bangs book. HE sees GLADYS’ book) What's this? (Picks up book) ‘This book shouldn’t be left lying around. (GLADYS enters, patting her hairdo, HASLER screams) Gladys! GLADYS (Stopping petrified ix doorway) Yes? HASLER Where have you been? - 31a2 - THE Pajama Game GLADYS Teen to the ladies’. Isn’t that all right? HASLER But this book — GLADYS Oh, Mr. Hasler, you scared the life out of me. Look. (Hand at throat — clutching key) Tve got the key around my neck. It’s all right HASLER (Crnsses L to her. Pounding out his words) Tdon’t want it left lying around, Is that clear? (Hands book to GLADYS) GLADYS Yes, Mr. Hasler. (SHE takes the book in a flushed Initiation and goes) HASLER (Crosses C — speaks to SID) Tf I can’t trust Gladys, who can I trust? SID (Steadily) I wouldn't know. HASLER What was my book doing here anyhow? (Seized with a sudden desire to find out, HE bolts the room folowing GLADYS) MABEL, (Turns at desk) Say Sid, who is this Fulton Lewis, Jr. he's always talking about? SID (Sitting) He plays third base for the Chicago White Sox. The old man's gota bad case of bookitis, hasn’t he? MABEL Oh yes.THE Pasama Game sID (Opening a desk drawer — looks for something) T wonder if he's got a skeleton locked in there. Say, Mabel ... tell me something, (Star What kind of a girl is this Babe Williams? writing busily) MABEL (Turns in chair to face SID) Babe? She's peppy. Full of spunk, sID (Working on papers) Is she married? MABEL (Leaning on chair) No, not quite. sID What do you mean not quite? MABEL (Getting confidential) Well, she was close once. She was engaged to the Johnson boy. Then one time at a football game she pushed him off the end of the bleachers and gave him a concussion. That broke the engagement. (HASLER enters from L. Crosses to C) sID (Nods) Outdoor girl. HASLER (Crosses C) Gladys is crying, She's hysterical (HE itnitates her sobs — to MABEL) Gump... (To SID) Gump... (Helples I don’t know. a34 - Tue Pajama Game MABEL She brought the ledger up here to enter the cost totals, Mr. Hasler HASLER Well, why in hell couldn’t somebody say so? (Exits L) My Gosh (SID picks up phone, MABEL is back at her work) sip (In phone) Give me ladies pants. Is this you, Prez? Sorokin speaking, Say, whatever happened to that complaint the Helper I'm supposed to have socked?... I'd like to get it settled. Would you send the (MABEL listens) .. grievance committee up to my office — no, right away, thanks. (Hangs up) MABEL (Turning to SID) Theard you had an eye for her. SID You hear things easy around this place. First thing you know they’ll be talking about us. MABEL Don't think it hasn't been mentioned. (MABEL turns back to her work) sID (Flipping key on dictaphone) Memo, cutting foreman. Too many rejects. (PHONE rings) On rayon crepe numbers (KNOCK on door) Come in, (BABE enters) MABEL. Hello!THE PAJAMA Game — 35 sID Have a seat. BABE Thank you (BABE closes door, crosses to chair L of desk, moves it LC and sits) sID (Into dictaphone) Look into it and report back (HE cuts off machine and starts writing) MABEL (nto PHONE) ‘Yes, Mr. Hasler! I will be right there. (Hangs up. Pause ~ Rises with jacket and notebook) Gladys is still crying and he wants me to take a couple of letters. (Crosses to door — looks back wisely at BABE and SID. Exit up L) sip (Stops writing on her exit) T wanted to talk to you about that assault and battery case. BABE Well, we thought we would just forget about that, Mr. Sorokin, sID ‘Yes? BABE Yeah. We all knew that injured arm was a lot of nonsense. To tell you the truth, we've had trouble with him before. sID Tcan believe that. If you only knew what I had to go through to get him to kick across with a screwdriver. I'd have been justified if | had socked him. BABE Well we won't go into that. But anyhow we have it down in our books as a slight nudge. (SHE rises. HE does likewise) { sID (Steps to her) Personally, I think a little physical punishment is good for people once in a while,ee THE Pajama Game BABE Oh, you do? Captain Bligh!! sID No — not exactly. Sit down for a second will you, Miss Williams. I want to talk to you. (BABE sits and so does HE) How about a date? BABE What? sID How about going out to dinner some night? BABE Wall, I don't know: sID Maybe check up on some of the local hot spots? BABE Thanks. But I don’t think so. (SHE rises — Cro: es f0 back of chair and leans on it) sID (Turns front) What is this strange power I have over women? BABE It really wouldn't work, not at all sID Looks like I struck out that time. BABE It's nothing personal. (SID rises — steps to her intimately) BABE But you see you're the Superintendent and I’m the Grievance Committee (Crosses = exits R)THE Pajama Game Sa (SID looks after her. After her exit SID sits at desk and flips on dictaphone) sID Memo: Time Keeper. Be sure all girls fill out time cards properly and check — Memo: to Sid Sorokin HEY THERE! YOU WITH THE STARS IN YOUR EYES, LOVE NEVER MADE A FOOL OF YOU YOU USED TO BE TOO WISE! HEY THERE! YOU ON THAT HIGH FLYIN’ CLOUD, THOUGH SHE WON'T THROW A CRUMB TO YOU, YOU THINK SOMEDAY SHE'LL COME TO YOU BETTER FORGET HER, (Looks off R at door) HER WITH HER NOSE IN THE AIR. SHE HAS YOU DANCIN’ ON A STRING, BREAK IT AND SHE WON'T CARE! i WILL YOU TAKE THIS ADVICE I HAND YOU LIKE A BROTHER? OR ARE YOU NOT SEEING THINGS TOO CLEAR, ARE YOU JUST TOO FAR GONE TO HEAR, ISIT ALL GOING IN ONE EAR, AND OUT THE OTHER? (HE flips the switch on the dictaphone, the machine has been left on and HE hears the sound of his oton voice coming back) MACHINE HEY THERE! YOU WITH THE STARS IN YOUR EYES, sID (Looking at machine) WHO, ME? MACHINE LOVE NEVER MADE A FOOL OF YOU, | | sID | (Sitting back) | NOT UNTIL NOW.38 - THe Pajama Game MACHINE, YOU USED TO BE TOO WISE. sID (Rises — Crosses to UR to window) YEAH, I WAS ONCE. MACHINE HEY THERE! SID (Looking back ~ then looking out window) THEAR YOU. MACHINE YOU ON THAT HIGH FLYIN’ CLOUD, (SID turns to MACHINE) THOUGH SHE WON'T THROW A CRUMB TO YOU, sID DON’T RUB ITIN. MACHINE YOU THINK SOMEDAY SHE'LL COME TO YOU. sID (Crosses to desk — picks up paper) AH, SHUT UP. MACHINE BETTER FORGET HER, sID (Looks off L. dreamily. Sings:) FORGET HER. (Drops paper — crosses to chair C) MACHINE HER WITH HER NOSE IN THE AIR sID HER WITH HER NOSE IN THE AIR! 3s8es to L of desk)| | THe PAJAMA Game MACHINE SHE HAS YOU DANCIN’ ON A STRING, sID A PUPPET ON A STRING! MACHINE BREAK IT AND SHE WON'T CARE. sID (Leaning over chair C) SHE WON'T CARE FOR ME! (SID crosses back fo desk) MACHINE WILL YOU. BOTH TAKE THIS ADVICE I HAND YOU LIKE A BROTHER? (SID flips off MACHINE) sID OR AM I NOT SEEING THINGS TOO CLEAR? (Flips MACHINE on) MACHINE ARE YOU TOO MUCH IN LOVE TO HEAR? (SID sits at desk. Shuts machine off) sID IS IT ALL GOING IN ONE EAR AND OUT THE OTHER? (DIMOUT BLACKDROP AND PICNIC SCRIM IN) Scene 5 (THE PICNIC CROSSOVER The lights come up revealing a wooded path. PEOPLE carrying PICNIC PROPS are crossing from L to R, going to a picnic. A group of BOYS enters first and crosses to R) ANDERSON (In baseball uniform with back to audience so they can see the Sleep Tite sign on his back, shouts to BOYS off L) Hey wait a minute ... Hey Eddie eoo- THE PAJAMA Game (GENARRO joins them and exits DR. ROCHE in bathing suit crosses from L to R. THE SALESMAN, MAX, enters from DL with BRENDA) MAX love these picnics ... 1 always come back from the road for them. Say, on this last trip I sold a lot ... (BORIS and WALLACE cross from L to R) of Sleep-Tite Pajamas. Believe me. BRENDA. You did, eh? MAX I knocked them for a loop in Massillon, Chillicothe, Van Wert, Napoleon, Finest season I ever had (SALESMAN and BRENDA exit DR. MAE enters from DL with MARA. CHARLENE follows with DILLON. ALL cross R) MAE Well, Il have to make an announcement about the mixup. It seems there ain't going to be enough baked beans to go around MARA Oh, Mae. MAE But there's plenty of potato salad ... So them that don't care for beans can go heavy on the potato salad and vice versa (WOODBURN and CARROLL carry a beer keg from I. to R. ALVAREZ follows with script. PREZ enters from DL carrying suitcase) PREZ (Crossing to C) Where's Heinzie, Gladys? (PREZ sets suitense down) GLADYS (Enters L, crosses to Prez) He couldn't keep up with me. PREZ Boy they gotta be good to keep up with you, and this is the day I say Let yourself go, huh?THE Pajama Game 41 GLADYS ‘You want to go some place? PREZ Aw, you know what I mean. (Turns away ~ upends suitcase) Say that's a mighty nifty outfit you got on. (Sits on suitcase) 1 go for that GLADYS Idon’t know. I brought a dress along too. Heinzie says this is too revealing PREZ (Rises) Itain’t too nothing. You tell Heinzie to go roll a hoop down Main Street. (GLADYS crosses below PREZ to RC) You have class, honey. You're beautiful. (HE puts his arms around her) GLADYS I know I'm beautiful. Probably the most beautiful girl north of Keokuk, lowa But you got a wife, Prez. (Pushes his hands acony, Turns to PREZ) PREZ Aw, forget that. Her and me is total strangers ... Listen, Baby. (Ve Gladys) PREZ I WOULDN'T NEVER TELL THIS TO NOBODY ELSE BUT YOU, TO NOBODY ELSE BUT YOU 1 WOULDN'T NEVER TELL THIS, WHAT I MEAN TO SAY IS, YOU'RE DIFFRENT FROM THE REST, BABY, YOU'RE THE BEST. (GLADYS turns avoay from him) AND I WOULDN'T NEVER TELL THIS: TO NOBODY ELSE (Arms around her) BUT YOU!42 - THE PAJAMA Game GLADYS (Spoken) AW, GO ON! (Throws his hands off. Sings) HAHA HA! PREZ (Puts arms around her) HAHA Hal GLADYS HAHA HAI (Puts his hands away ~ positively — PREZ puts arms around her again) PREZ HAHA HA! (GLADYS pushes his hands off angrily) #9a — Her Is ( Game) HER IS A KINDA DOLL WHAT DRIVES A FELLA BATS, ISN'T HER? GLADYS HER IS! (Turns away R, back to him) PREZ HER HAS A KINDA SHAPE THAT REALLY IS THE CATS, HASN'T HER? (Puts his arms around her) GLADYS HER HA (Throws his hands off — Crosses to L) PREZ (Crosses to R of her — crossing LC) MY WIFE, SHE AIN'T UNDERSTANDIN’ SHE AIN'T LIKE HER IS! THIS HERE AIN'T NO LINE I’M HANDIN OR | SHOULD DROP DEAD RIGHT WHERE I’M STANDIN'!!Tur Pajama Game — 43 (PREZ jumps L nervously. GLADYS crosses to R below Prez. HE puts hands on her hips) (PREZ) HER IS A SNAPPY DRESSER WHAT IS DRESSED TO KILL, ISN'T HER? | GLADYS (Stops) HER IS! PREZ HER IS THE ONLY DOLL, FROM WHICH I GET A THRILL, ISN’T HER? i (Stepping far R — hands on her hips) | GLADYS HER IS! (Crosses to L of him — HE takes her hand ~ SHE pulls other way) PREZ HER IS RUNNIN’ AWAY BUT HER SURE CAN BET, HIM IS GONNA GET HER YET. | | (Pulls her to him hand-over-hand by her R arm) YM GONNA GET HER YET! #9b — Her Is (Dance) Caer (Pulls her around — embraces her — bending way over her) GLADYS: HAHA HA! PREZ HAHAHA! (DANCE ~ then repeat. GLADYS swings kerchief from side to side across her reat) PREZ HER IS A SNAPPY DRESSER WHAT IS DRESSED TO KILL, ISN'T HER? GLADYS HER IS!4a - Tne Pajama Game PREZ HER IS THE ONLY DOLL FROM WHICH I GET A THRILL, ISN'T HER? GLADYS HER IS! PREZ HER IS RUNNIN’ (Picks up bog) AWAY BUT HER SURE CAN BET, HIM IS GONNA GET HER YET, (Stepping OR. SHE nods “yes” to him) I'M GONNA GET HER YET! (SHE shakes her head “no” to audience End of number on exit) (DIMOUT — DROP FLY) Scene 6 (THE PICNIC As the lights come up we discover the factory EMPLOYEES at their annual picnic ~ they are singing the company song:) aS Cr FACTORY EMPLOYEES SLEEP TITE, SLEEP TITE, SLEEP TITE, WE PLEDGE OUR HEARTS’ DEVOTION TO THEE, TO THEE. OH, SLEEP TITE, SLEEP TITE, BEST IN THE LAND, WITH YOUR REINFORCED BUTTONS, AND STRETCH-PROOF WAISTBAND. PREZ (Stepping up on table) An’ now we're going to hear from another speaker. And at this time it gives me great pleasure to introduce to you at this time somebody, and he don’t actually need no introduction on account of we all know him and it’s always a pleasure to have him with our midst, and it gives me great pleasure to introduce to you our boss, Mr. Myron Hasler. Okay Mr. Hasler,4 a THe Pajama Game - 45 (Clapping and whistling — HASLER rises. PREZ gets off table, HASLER takes his place) HASLER (Motions with hands) Thank you, I'm proud to be with you. We're all members of a great industry. ‘To that industry we owe our lives and our daily bread. In return, we must recognize the stern obligations placed upon us in these terrible times of economic upheaval and governmental chaos, I can never remember a time when competition was so ruthless, dealers so cantankerous, costs outrageous, and profit margins sunk so low. My good friends, pajamas are at the crossroads; whether we go on to greater triumphs lies in you; whether your company can weather the storm of rising costs isa grave question, I thank you. (Scattered applause. HASLER off table) i PREZ (Gets on table) ‘Thanks, Mr. Hasler. 'm sure we all enjoyed hearing from you. And certainly nice to have you with us. Now, first thing after we leave the festive board there will be a knife-throwing exhibition by Professor Vernon Hines. (CROWD laughs and cheers) HINES (Rises and bows — HE is on table R) And I never miss. —~ (HE drinks — sits) PREZ The baseball game will start at 1:30 sharp, between the finishing room and ladies’ pants. This is a grudge contest and it ought to be good. Now, who wants to be my partner in the three-legged race? That's all. (HE jumps off table. BABE crosses D in front of table L, SID crosses around table R and gradually works LC toward BABE. CHARLEY crosses USC from knife board. MAX crosses around table R and USC near Charley, BRENDA crosses DSC from behind knife board. PREZ crosses DSC and meets BRENDA. MAE crosses DRC for picture pose. HINES goes USR and gets knife table, MABEL sits on bench USR. HASLER exits UL. CROWD breaks up)46 - Tur Pajama Game SANDRA Me for the baseball. (Rises, exits DR) CARMEN Twant to be in the three-legged race CHARLENE You can't win if you don’t practice. POOPSIE (Rings bell — Crosses DSR — exits) Hear ye, hear ye, this way for the knife-throwing (GROUP forms RC for picture taking) PREZ (To BRENDA, SC) Hello Gorgeous, how about another beer? BRENDA Allright. PREZ (Pulling L) This way. BRENDA (Pointing R) But the refreshment stand is PREZ No, no, it’s out this way. (Takes her out L) POOPSIE (Enters from DR, crosses LSC, ringing bell) Hear ye, hear ye. This way for the knife-throwing, (As PREZ and BRENDA exit, SID crosses LC to BABE) sID Well, if it isn’t Miss Grievance Committee, BABE Oh, hello,| : | | THE PAJAMA Game sID (BOTH cross DS) Thave a grievance, there is a new fellow here named Sid Sorokin, been knocking himself out trying to be a dandy fellow but he can’t make a score. (Picture GROUP forms new pose DSR — HUTCHINSON crosses DR to take picture from new angle) MAE (Squatting in front of picture group). Say, Eddie, I want an enlargement of this. BABE (Crosses D to foots SL) You tell him Miss Williams is a very cold-hard-boiled doll and he wouldn't like her at all if he got to know her. (BOY chases GIRL from UL to DR and kisses her DR) sID (Turns to watch BOY and GIRL) T'll tell him but he’s an awful problem — stubborn as hell. (TWO COUPLES in 3-legged race cross from UL to R) BRENDA (Running in DL, disheveled) No. I don’t. Some people have no sense at all, darn fool BABE What happened to you? BRENDA (Straightening clothes) Stay out in the open, honey, don’t get down in them woods. (Crosses USC. POOPSIE crosses DL and back to UR ringing bell. GLADYS enters DR crosses UR and sits at table. SID crosses DL, BABE DR) MAX Now, hurry, hurry. Make way for The Old Professor! HINES (Crosses DL with table and knives) Wait until I place my knives. azulaaa THe Pajama Game MAX Hurry, hurry, hurry, for a riot of thrills, Introducing Professor Vernon Hines, Master of the Flying Blades CROWD Hurray. (PREZ runs on from UL — stands on table L. OTHERS run on to watch from R and L) MAX in his sensational demonstration of iron nerve and skill exactly as performed in his professional appearances before the crowned heads of Missouri and Kansas, CROWD Hurray, (Applause) MAX Are you ready, Professor? HINES (Crosses to MAX) Tam ready, Say, is the trained nurse in attendance? MAX The trained nurse is here, HINES The excitement may prove to be too great a strain on some of our fair spectators, (MARY whois standing on picnic table URC pretends to swoon in WOODBURN's arms) MARY Ooooh! HINES (With knives in hand prepares to make a throw) Ladies and gents, your kind attention. Here we go. One — two — three .. (HE throws a knife... CLUNK) CROWD Hurrah, Bravo (Applause. POOPSIE crosses to front of Target. SHE points to where SHE wants HINES to throw the next knife. BRENDA pulls her atoay) HINES Get back! Here we go. Fin — 2wei — dreiTHE PAJAMA Gamer (HINES) (Throws second knife ... CLUNK. CHEERS and APPLAUSE) Now if some daring young lady in the audience will consent to stand against the board, I will show you the act as it should be played. (ALL — General ad libs) BRENDA. No, Heinzie we all want to live. MABEL It's too dangerous. CROWD Not me. I gota date. My mother loves me ... (etc. etc,) GLADYS (To HINES) Don't make a damned fool of yourself, Vernon. BRENDA You do it, Mae ... You're so thin he can't miss ... (Grabs MAE — MORDEA pushes her off bench. HINES follows, jabbing with a knife) MAE Heinzie, Heinzie! (Breaks away — sits on bench) HINES (Crosses DL) Eleven years in the public eye and never drew a drop of blood. PAT (From DL) Hey Heinzie, I'l do it... 1 do itt! sip (From DL, taking hold of PAT) Hey, hey. Don't get foolish, BABE Tl doit (SHE steps in front of the board and puts apple on her head) MABEL (Rises) Don't be silly, Babe! Sg50 - THE Pajama GAME CROWD (Ad lib) x : Oh, no Babe. etc. etc. * BABE Can you knock the apple off my head, Heinzie? (Ad libs — William Tell overture) PREZ That's the spirit, Babe ... you show ‘em, kid! (General ad bibs) MABEL (Steps DC) I don’t think she should. GLADYS No. she shouldn't. HINES Hold still! And you won't get hurt! One — two — three. (HE throws knife ... CLUINK. Screams from CROWD. BABE ducks. The apple rolls to C. SHE runs to get it but SID gets'it first. THEY struggle with it. OTHERS cross D to HINES, protesting) BRENDA Heinzie! You're making us all so nervous! HINES Making you nervous? How the hell do you think I feel? (PROTESTERS cross U silently) BABE Where's my apple? Fl rat (Covered by laughter) I think that’s enough! i BABE Give it to me. (SHE gets the apple from SID and goes back to target. SID Crosses DR) a POOPSIE She's shaking ... My God she’s shaking! (BRENDA's and MAE'S following speeches plus general ad libs)THE Pajama GAME BRENDA You'd better not, Babe! MAE Something awful is going to happen! sID (Crosses U to BABE) Come on now! Don’t be a damned fool! BABE Keep out of this! Go on shoot, Professor! HINES (Stamping foot angrily ~ facing around — back to audience) All right, everybody. Hold still! (Io BABE) . Now just relax! One — two ~ three... (Throws knife. CLUNK. ALL scream and freeze) MABEL Is it over? OoooHH!!! (SHE collapses in a dead faint SC. Falls on EVANS) sID (HE pulls BABE C and breaks up the crowd) Now cut that out. Get these tables out of there. (Grabs HINES by shoulder DL) God damn it, break it uptt! (THE CROWD breaks up and exits clearing tables, targets, card tables, chairs, stools, etc. as they go) HINES It’s an insult. My skill has never been questioned before. sID Oh, go drown yourself. (Crosses LIC to MABEL) SANDRA (Enters from DR, crosses to C) Hey, kids. Guess what? Mr, Hasler’s playing first base, and he's so funny. (Crosses R, exits)52 - Tue Pajama Game BRENDA (To BABE) Hasler? First base? Holy smoke. Let's go. 2 (BABE shakes head. BRENDA exits DR) HINES (To GLADYS who has crossed DL to him) [tell you, I’m not jealous, GLADYS I didn’t say you were jealous, I said you were drunk. HINES Well, you can’t have everything, (HE exits following GLADYS DL with his knife table. There is a general ad lib as remainder of CROWD disperses off the stage. PREZ crosses to MAE, who is LC) PREZ (Stops DS from behind tree L) Where are you going, Mae? MAE No place special. (PREZ nods head OL ~ Pulls her OL by arm. THEY exit leaving SID DR. and BABE RC) sID (Crossing to BABE) My, but you're an impetuous girl BABE 1 get along all right. sID That defiant policy of yours is going to get you into trouble some day, Catherine Williams. BABE Well, it's been working out all right so far. SID Listen, I've got a new policy in mind. For both you and me BABE Oh?THe Pajama Game sID Let's quit fighting. BABE What fight? sip Come here, Catherine. (SID takes BABE’s hand and leads her to DR) BABE Where are we going? sID Babe and Sid are going for a walk together. The new policy. (HE backs her up against a tree. THEY Gee, baby ... you're terrific (HE takes her hand) BABE (Facing him — holding his US hand patting his DS shoulder) You're not so bad yourself. (SID and BABE — crossing C) Cri mea) Eee cae sID ‘THIS IS MY ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY. FELT THE MORNING SUN AND KNEW THAT ‘THIS WAS MY ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY, ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY. EVEN GOT A KISS FROM YOU, (Turns BABE around) I FEEL LIKE HOPPING UP AND DOWN (Lifts her up, SHE s her feet in the air) LIKE A KANGAROO, JUMPIN’ FENCES, CLIMBIN’ TRE! WHAT PLEASES ME IS WHAT I'LL DO, ‘CAUSE (SID twirls BABE)54 = THE Pajama Game ALL THIS IS OUR ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY. EVERYONE'S ENTITLED TO BE WILD, BE A CHILD, BE A GOOF, RAISE THE ROOF ONCE A YEAR! (SID and BABE polka) ‘THIS IS OUR ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY. ONCE-A-YEAR WE'RE JUMPIN’ FENCES, THIS IS OUR ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY. (DANCER crosses RC — SID holds her feet SHE walks on hands — BABE watches — edges R after them) ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY, ONCE A YEAR WE LOSE OUR SENSES. BABE (Crossing RC) LOOK AT CHARLEY UP A TREE KISSIN’ KATIE'S EAR CHARLEY’S WIFE IS MAD AS HELL! ALL AH WELL, IT HAPPENS ONCE A YEAR. (SID and BABE exit SR) AND THIS IS THAT ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY, ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY. (THREE DANCERS do leap frog from R to LC) EVERYONE'S ENTITLED TO BE WILD, BE A CHILD, BE A GOOF, RAISE THE ROOF ONCE A YEAR! POOPSIE LOOK AT PAPA HALTERBUSH NINETY-TWO TODAY. RUNNING OFF WITH SADIE LEE, ALL HE'S HEADIN’ FOR THAT PILE OF HAY “CAUSE THIS IS HIS ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY, ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY.THe Payama Game bs | | | | 1 | | | | | (ALL) EVERYONE'S ENTITLED TO BE WILD, BE A CHILD, BE A GOOF, RAISE THE ROOF— ONCE A YEAR! (DANCE — at end BLACKOUT — Picnic scrim and black drop come in) Scene 7 (THE PICNIC CROSSOVER It is twilight. MAX carrying water toy, MABEL carrying her hat, and CHARLEY with beer bottle enter slowly from DR and cross to L) MAX (Stopping SC) Sounds gruesome me. (Starts L again) MABEL (Following Max) ‘That ain’t the worst of it. (CHARLEY has stopped RC) Come on, Charley ... If I can make it you can. Well, anyway he was Elsie Bartlett's, second cousin. (Stops LC. MAX also stops) He fell into the concrete mixer when they were building the new bridge. CHARLEY (Stopping again) My God. MABEL ‘They never did find the body so they poured the conerete and held the funeral on top of the second pier on the Illinois side #10a — Once-a-Year Day Crossover (Tenor, Chorus) ONE TENOR CHORUS HM, ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY, HM, ONCE-A-YEAR-DAY. HM, EVERYONE'S ENTITLED TO BE WILD, HM, BE A CHILD, BE A GOOF, RAISE THE ROOF. HM.56 - The PAjAMA Game (ALL exit slowly DL. FORD and MARTIN, carrying a water toy, enter DR and cross 1. followed by MATTHEW carrying O'CONNOR pic-a-back. ALL sing slow version of Once-A-Year- Day. ADAMO and DILLON follow them and then DEL and LEROY carrying EVANS between them. EVANS sings “Be a goof” ~ tips bottle over — drinks. They ALL cross to Land exit. PREZ and MAE enter from DR, cross to RC. PREZ leads her by the hand) MAE (Stopping) What I like about picnics ... they bring people together PREZ They sure do, MAE T never thought you was aware I was alive until today. PREZ How could I miss you? (MAE turns R coyty) You're the kind that stands out in a crowd, You know what I mean? You've got what it takes. You know something else that's a mighty elegant outfit you got on. MAE Oh, it’s just casual (Crosses to L. PREZ tres fo embrace her. SHE pushes him azvay, sending him hurlling to the ground, then crosses C straightening her blouse) Listen, Prez... what would your wife say? PREZ (Picking himself up) Don’t worry about that. (Crosses to her) Her and me hardly talk to each other any more. MAE You don't? PREZ Certainly not. MAE You know what? Something I like about you (SHE punches him in the stonaach with her elbow)ssh THe PAJAMA GAME PREZ Ugh! MAE You got such a swell brain PREZ (Gulping) So have you. MAE You're a snappy dresser too. PREZ ‘Oh, get around. MAE I go for that. PREZ I go for you. MAE Ha ha ha, PREZ Haha ha, Ee Oaen cages PREZ HER IS A KINDA DOLL. WHAT DRIVES A FELLA BATS, ISN'T HER? MAE (Hands on hips) HER IS. PREZ (Indicates her figure) HER HAS THE KINDA SHAPE THAT REALLY IS THE CATS, HASN'T HER? Gzevoo)- 58 - THE PAjAMA Game MAE (Hands back of head) HER HAS, PREZ I'VE SEEN WHAT GIRLS EAST TO THE WEST HAVE, NONE HAVE WHAT HER HAS. (Jabs her R hip with finger) YES, | HAVE SEEN WHAT THE BEST HAVE, BUT YOU HAVE TWICE AS MUCH AS THE REST HAVE. (SHE dances imitating GLADYS, R to L) HER IS A SNAPPY DRESSER WHAT IS DRESSED TO KILL, ISN'T HER? MAE HERIS. PREZ HER IS THE ONLY DOLL FROM WHICH GET A THRILL, (MAE turns sexily) ISN'T HER? MAE HER 1s (THEY start dancing off 1. to end of N R) PREZ HER IS RUNNING AWAY BUT HER SURE CAN BET HIM IS GONNA GET HER YET I'M GONNA GET HER YET. (SHE yanks HIM off into the wings) (DIMouT) Scene 8 (THE KITCHEN OF BABE’S HOUSE There is a table and to chairs DR, refrigerator UL, stove UR, morris chair LC, entrances L and US)Tue Payama Game 59 — (As scene opens SID and POP are discovered sitting at table DR. SID is drinking coffee) POP When you first come here after that picnic last week, she says to me ... don’t be a pest ... don’t talk too damned much. (HE laughs) But it might be worse if I didn’t talk at all, eh, Sid? sID You're right. POP Talways say a railroad man can’t be too much of a damned pest — cause he ain’t home enough. x sID (Laughs politely) You go out on your run tonight, don’t you? POP Yes ... off to Milwaukee, doggone it! (Taking PETRIFIED BAT out of his pocket) Say, ... (BABE enters Land stands in doorway) .. here's something you don’t see every day. (Leans over table) sID agree. What is it? por A petrified bat. (BABE slams door loudly — crosses to LC) BABE Now, Pop, Sid is not interested in petrified bats. POP (HE rises — crosses to C) Well, what the hell dear ... I didn’t say he was, BABE (Pointing at him) I know you,ee THE PAJAMA Game POP (HE crosses below morris chair towards bedroom) ‘The tyranny of women. BABE (Chiding) Too bad. POP Well , I'd better get my things. ~ (Consults watch) Old number fifteen waits for no man, (POP exits into bedroom. BABE crosses to chair L of table and kneels on it) BABE Pop belt your ears off? sID He's a great guy ... [like him, (HE rises ... goes to her and tries to kiss her) But I like you better. BABE (Pulls away — steps DC — face front) No, no, no. Wait till Pop goes out. (SID sets kitchen chair for a number to follow) Are you hungry? (SHE crosses to icebox UL) SID (Follows her and kisses her neck end of speech) Not exactly hungry. Not the way you mean anyway. BABE Oh you. (HE tries to kiss her again. SHE pushes iim any and hands hiv a bottle of ber) Here, have a beer sID Thanks. (SHE crosses to stove UR with loaf of bread. HE is above morris chair LC)THE Pajama Game 61 (POP enters from bedroom. HE has his stamp album with him. HE Crosses to LC) POP Say, Sid. You like stamps? BABE Pop! PoP Well, even if he don’t, this is something that should be interesting to anybody. (Hands album fo SID. crosses to UC, gets his lunch pail from sink, then crosses to BABE) ‘Two sets of Mint Columbians. Plate blocks on every issue since 1919, sID Well, thanks POP (Kisses BABE and crosses to door C) Goodbye, Katie BABE Goodbye. POP Come around any time, Sid. (As POP opens door, TRAIN WHISTLE is heard, fading shortly) sID Td like to. (POP exits, SID takes off coat puts it on back of chair. HE crosses down to morris chair with albu, and sits) Well now we can settle down for a nice long evening with the stamp album, (HE looks at album) Say, he has got a full set of Mint Columbians. BABE (SHE crosses back of SID‘ chair and puts her hands on his shoulders) Sure he has. That's why I work at Sleep Tite. (SHE rests her head on his) sip He's a nice guy, Babe —62 - THe Pajama Game BABE You're a good boy, Sid. He likes you too. sID (Kisses her hand) I feel good, Babe. I feel like home. (HE kisses her hand again) BABE I wonder if we've got any Onions. sID Onions? BABE (Crosses to icebox) I'm gonna make a Western, Want one? sID That's my baby, boys: She wants a Western. (Closes album and puts it on table BABE crosses to stove with egg dish) No, honey, I do not want a Western. (Rises and crosses to L end of kitchen table) Food is not uppermost in my thoughts at the moment. BABE (Crosses down to R end of kitchen table) Guess you'll want some coffee too. sID No ... it'll keep me awake, Now cut it out (HE crosses around above table to her) eee BABE What's the matter, lover? sID 1 DON’T WANNA TALK SMALL TALK (At back of table) NOW THAT I'M ALONE WITH YOU.THe Pajama Gamer (SHE fixes his tie) (SID) I DON’T WANNA TALK SMALL TALK (Leaning over chair and reaches for her) WE'VE GOT BIGGER THINGS TO DO. (SHE crosses below table. Slowly. Sits on table edge) LET'S NOT TALK OF THE WEATHER, OR THE FASHIONS FOR THE FALL. (HE crosses around table to LC, Slowly to her L) WHY DON'T YOU STOP ALL THIS SMALL TALK? sID (Arms around her waist) I'VE GOT SOMETHING BETTER FOR YOUR LIPS TO DO, AND THAT TAKES NO TALK AT ALL, (Leans to kiss) BABE 1 GOTTA BUY ME A DRESSY DRESS, ‘THE ONE THAT I HAVE IS SUCH A MESS! SID SMALL TALK! (Walks away C and returns) BABE (Sits up from table and stops hin) WHO WILL YOU VOTE FOR NEXT ELECTION? (Points over his shoulder) HOW DO YOU LIKE THE STAMP COLLECTION? sID SMALL TALK! (BABE sits on table and SID leans on it) READ IN A BOOK THE OTHER DAY, THAT HALIBUT SPAWN IN EARLY MAY, AND HORSES WHINNY AND DONKEYS BRAY, AND FURTHERMORE, THE PYGMY TRIBES IN AFRICA MAY HAVE A WAR. 63 -Tue Pajama Game BABE No? SID Yes! (BABE turns, picks up paper) SID 1 DON'T. (HE follows her around table) .: WANNA TALK SMALL TALK, BABE (Crossing C) WHAT DO YOU THINK THEY CHARGE FOR HAM NOW? (Opens paper half) sID NOW THAT I'M ALONE WITH YOU. BABE (Crossing LC) GOT SO A BUCK AIN'T WORTH A DAMN NOW. (Opens paper full) sID 1 DON'T WANNA TALK SMALL TALK. BABE READ WHERE THE WINTERS ARE GETTING MILDER. sID WE'VE GOT BIGGER THINGS TO DO, (HE closes int, tries to hold her) BABE (Holds paper up) AND THAT THE TEEN-AGE KIDS ARE WILDER sID LETS NOT TALK OF THE WEATHER,.... (Takes paper away from her)Tae Pajama Game BABE ONE OF THESE DAYS I'LL PAINT THE KITCHEN, ... (SHE crosses UC) sID OR THE FASHIONS FOR THE FALL (HE puts paper on table and crosses to her R) BABE (Crosses RC — points R ~ SID puts arms around her waist) GET POP TO PUT A NEW LIGHT SWITCH IN. sID (Turns to her and backs her to table) WHY DON'T YOU STOP ALL THIS SMALL TALK? BABE LIKE 1 WAS SAYIN’ SID I'VE GOT SOMETHING BETTER... BABE WHAT | MEAN IS... sID FOR YOUR LIPS. ~ BABE IWAS ONLY, sID TO DO. (Iucet. THEY kiss on this phrase) BABE (After kiss) I think I'll make that Western, -sID (Following) ‘Oh, Babe, have a heart! Eien66 Tne Pajama Game BABE (Looking in drawer) Every darned apron in the wash. (Crosses DC) sID (Following) ‘That's your great worry in life, eh? BABE I don't want to get grease spots on this dress. | paid twenty bucks for it sID Take it off. (HE starts to embrace her) You're among friends. BABE Look out, I'm cooking. : SID You sure are. (THEY kiss, BOTH sit in chair L of table. BABE rises and woalks DC may from hima) BABE Nell, I might as well be practical. (Takes off belt, crosses US back of table. Takes off dress and hands it to him) Nould you hang it up for me please? (SID starts across SL with dress in hand and looks at ler. BABE crosses to cabinet R, rolls belt and puts on top, SHE puts plates on the table) sID tee, I ove to see a girl wandering around the house in her slip. (Crosses far L and gets hanger) Iwas an Oriental potentate I'd have the girls in the harem parading around in ips instead of those damn pants. (Fumbling with her dress and the hanger) ow the hell do you hang this thing up? BABE (Putting cup and saucer on table) -ep trying, Lover.| i THe Pajama Game (SID hangs it up and puts kis own cont with it) sID Sport coat ... this is Miss Williams! dress. You two kids get acquainted. (BABE is standing by the fable looking at him. SID suddenly changes his mood) Babe, I love you. (BABE sits. SID goes and kneels beside the chair with his arms around her) Darling. BABE Sid. There's something I got to talk about. sID What? BABE (Holds hiv closer) I think you're wonderful and I love you. But we're in for a lot of trouble. sID No. baby, why should we be? BABE There's something going to come between us, (Rises, crosses to LC) SID Who? BABE Not any who. Seven-and-a-half cents. sID Oh that (Rise, crosses to her) BABE (SHE turns to him) That contract, Lover ... that's important. Maybe we ought to face that before .. sID (Tries to kiss her) Don't talk nonsense. 67 =68 - THE Pajama GAME BABE (Pulls away. From above chair L) Sid, you mustn’t treat me like a baby. SID T'm not, darling, BABE (Intensely) You've got to listen. I don’t know why the Union's so important to me ... but it is I guess you got to be on a team. And that’s why no matter what's with us ... I'm going to be fighting for my side and fighting hard sID All right, (Pause) How do you feel about me, Babe? BABE Hove you terribly. sID (Kneels on morris chair and takes both her tainds) If we both feel that way about each other, isn’t that enough? BABE You don’t know me. SID Babe, I love you BABE (Looks into his eyes) All right. I can take it if you can. (SHE sings, crossing to him, LC) BABE 1 DON’T WANNA TALK SMALL TALK. (SHE embraces him) sID V'VE GOT SOMETHING BETTER FOR YOUR LIPS TO DO, AND THAT TAKES NO TALK AT ALL.THE Pajama Game (THEY kiss and sit in chair) (DIMouT UNIT MOVES US — ELEVATOR DROP IN) Scene 9 (THE RAILWAY As the lights come in, POOPSIE, PREZ, MAE, SECOND HELPER and BRENDA enter {from DL and cross to C) PREZ Mr. Hasler called. 1 spoke to him personally. He says he wants to see us tomorrow in his office at noon. POOPSIE Does that mean we've won? MAE We've won. We've won. We've won. (MAE jumps up and docwon and then squeezes SECOND HELPER, nearly breaking hin in two. SHE releases him and HE crosses DR doubled ever) Oh. I'm sorry. PREZ Take it easy, Mae. Mr. Hasler just wants to talk to us, (Crosses R) BRENDA Shouldn't we wait for Babe? POOPSIE (Crosses L) What for? You know who she's going out with ... Mr. Somebody Special BRENDA Babe's all right, POOPSIE I didn’t say she wasn't, but she sure is busy these days. MAE Well, I don’t think a girl should get too emotional over the management BRENDA Babe can take care of herself. MAE The trouble is when you start falling for a guy, (Looks at PREZ and then back to POOPSIE, and sees BABE enter) how do you know how far you're going to fall? 69 ~70 - Tne Pasama Game (BABE has entered from DR) wre tere fea (lua) BRENDA Hello, Babe. we're talkin’ about you BABE Why not? BRENDA Are you coming? BABE No. I've, gat a date BRENDA. Have fun. BABE Iwill. (THEY all exit DR leaving BABE alone on the stage. BABE crosses to R, turns L and says!) Here am. (SID enters from DL and crosses to her at C) Hil sID (Embraces her) Hil Did I keep you waiting? BABE That makes it much nicer when you get here. sID I've got one more thing to do! Do you mind another five minutes? BABE I don’t mind anything. I love you. sID Hove you more. (Pause. HE puts his arm around her. THEY cross to R) Babe, (Stops, HE turns her) are you happy?THe PasaMa Game BABE I don’t even touch the ground sip It's good, isn’t it? BABE So good I can hardly believe it, Tell me sID Again? (Backing away from her) BABE Tell me, sID Hove you. BABE Tell me. sID Tove you more than all the heroes in all the history books in the world. BABE Tell me. sID What a woman. I'll tell you. LZR ECLA Cn (Sid, Babe) (HE signals for her to come to him, SHE does so and sits on his R knee. THEY sing) sID THERE ONCE WAS A MAN, WHO LOVED A WOMAN, SHE WAS THE ONE HE SLEW A DRAGON FOR! THEY SAY THAT NOBODY EVER LOVED AS MUCH AS HE-EE. BUT ME-EE, (HE kisses her) I LOVE YOU MORE. BABE Tell me! 71THe Pajama Game (Follow sID AND THERE ONCE WAS A MAN, WHO LOVED A WOMAN, SHE WAS THE ONE HE GAVE HIS KINGDOM FOR. THEY SAY THAT NOBODY EVER LOVED AS MUCH AS HE-EE. BUT ME-EE, (HE kisses her) I LOVE YOU MORE, MY LOVE IS A GIANT, FIERCE AND DEFIANT BUT HOW CAN 1 PROVE IT TO YOU? AIN'T GOT NO KINGDOM OR DRAGON ‘TO BACK UP MY BRAGGIN’, HOW CAN I SHOW WHATI WOULD DO? ONLY KNOW THERE ONCE WAS A MAN, WHO LOVED A WOMAN, SHE WAS THE ONE HE ATE THE APPLE FOR, THEY SAY THAT NOBODY EVER LOVED AS MUCH AS HE-EE. BUT ME-EE, 1 LOVE YOU MORE. BABE THERE ONCE WAS A WOMAN, WHO LOVED A MAN, HE WAS THE ONE THAT SHE TOOK POISON FOR. THEY SAY THAT NOBODY EVER LOVED AS MUCH AS SHE-EE. BUT ME-EE, I LOVE YOU MORE, AND THERE ONCE WAS A WOMAN, WHO LOVED A MAN, HE WAS THE ONE SHE SWAM THE CHANNEL FOR. THEY SAY THAT NOBODY EVER LOVED AS MUCH AS SHE-EE. BUT ME-EE, I LOVE YOU MORE MY LOVE'S METEORIG, IT’S MERELY HISTORIC, A WHIRLWIND, A CYCLONE ON WHEELS. IT ROCKS MUH WHOLE SOLAR PLEXUS, IT'S BIGGER THAN TEXAS. [JUST CAN'T TELL YOU HOW IT FEELS. TONLY KNOW THERE ONCE WAS A WOMAN, WHO LOVED A MAN, LOVED HIM ENOUGH TO CAUSE THE TROJAN WAR, ‘THEY SAY THAT NOBODY EVER LOVED AS MUCH AS SHE-EE. BUT ME-EE, | LOVE YOU MORE, MORE, MORE, MORE!BEB Rai rane Gara sID Re SnAnALANGM Annan re cre ree BABE re) DOEEHIEND Toy ge erence SID OSEAN ANINIDNG Oy ge erect en BABE MOR ETIIAN A CODETERT G ura enetttpe oe BABE MORE, MORE, MORE, MoRE, MORE, MORE. MORE, THERE ONCE WAS A MAN, ‘THERE ONCE Was A WOMAN, WHO LOVED A WOMAN. WHO LOVED A MAN. SHE WAS THE ONE HE SLEW THE DRAGON FOR! EE ASTRON SHE TOOK POISON FOR! THEY SAY THAT NOBODY EVER LOVED AS MUCH AS SHE-EE, BUT MELE, LOVE YOU MORE. THEY SAY THAT NOBODY EVER LOVED, AS MUCH AS HE-EE, BUT ME-EE, LOVE YOU MORE, (SHE jumps into his arms and is carvieg off DL) (DIMOUT DROPOUT) Scene 10 (THE SHOP As the scene opens we see BRENDA MABEL enters from DR and sees thy ‘machines UL) and POOPSIE UR listenin, 1g at the entrance. OM. SHE crosses to C. FOUR GIRLS are aboveTe Tur Pajama Game MABEL (Crossing to DC) Well PoorsiE D to er, BRENDA follows) ‘The committee is in there talking to Mr. Hasler right now MABEL I'm steering clear of there. I'll go get my lunch. BRENDA. We et already, (POOPSTE and BRENDA exit DL, MABEL crosses to L and meets By from DU BE who enters MABEL Well, Babe BABE Howdy, Mabel = MABEL Thear you and Sid make a lovely couple on the dance floor. (PREZ, JOE, and MAE enter from UR. MABEL exits DL, THEY o) PREZ Sure thing, MAE Ttold you we wouldn't get no place. JOE Looks like another run around, Prez, (HE crosses k of Prez to L) (Turning to He's fighter, he says. (HE turns to BABE) What a line. MAE You should have heard him, Babe, SLADYS enters from UR and crosses to RC)i aia tincnin THE PAJAMA Game GLADYS Wait a minute please, Mr. Hasler wants-to speak to you again, (THE FOUR GIRLS UL exit UL) MAE More soft soap. PREZ (Pushes MAE behind him) Now, Mae, quiet down, (HASLER enters from UR, crosses to UC) HASLER Tjust want to add one thought. Let’s not adjourn with any hard feelings. We want to Preserve that fine Sleep Tite spirit PREZ That's easy to say, Mr. Hasler, but we're not getting any place. MAE We're goin’ backwards, HASLER (Crosses DC) Tdidn’t say “no.” I said “not now.” PREZ Look, Mr: Hasler this thing's been draggin’ on for months. The help are getting very jumpy. Their patience is about wore out, HASLER Twant to be fair but PREZ {im going to tell you the plain truth, We know the company is doin’ one hell of a business. We don’t have no education maybe but we got eyes and ears MAE Everybody in the industry has had a seven-and-a-half cent raise. HASLER As said T want to be fair. That's always been my policy. S0 I don't give youa yes, but I don’t give you a no. I say we've got to examine it .. and I've got to talk to the board and that's the way we're going to leave it (HASLER exits UR, followed by GLADYS) 75Paro THE Pajama Game MAE (Crosses to PREZ) What now, Prez? PREZ (Pause) Slow down! MAE Atta boy. This is it (GONG) There's the bell (GIRLS start entering from UL and DR. BRENDA enters from DL. They all go to their machines. MAE crossing L to BABE) This is what we've been waiting for. JOE We got to get started some place PREZ him) (To BRENDA as SHE pa Slow down. (HE crosses to BABE) You're in charge of this room, Babe. Go to it (PREZ starts out L) Slow down! (PREZ exits DL. THEY alll pass the word from one to the other as they resume their places at the machines. After the GIRLS are set, BABE crosses to third machine and tells GIRL that SHE will take her place. THE GIRL rises and runs off DR. BABE sits) ) (During this introductory music the GIRLS go about their business very slowly and Iaboriously. HINES enters from UR, HE crosses to C, HE pulls a stop watch from his pocket, beats a faster tempo with his foot and says:) (MUSIC begi HINES Something's very wrong here. (HINES crosses to POOPSIE)THE Pajama Game - 77 (HINES) What's the matter? POOPSIE I guess I'm just overworked or something, Mr. Hines. Ever since lunch I just can’t seem to get the hang of it, (SHE reaches lackadaisically for thread. HINES pushes her arm to speed up motion) HINES Well I think I get the hang of it and I'm going to sce the superintendent on what's going on around here. #14a — Slow Down (Girls) (HINES exits UR, GIRLS enter DR and UR and DL) GIRLS 1 GIRLS 2 GIRLS 3 HURRY UP, HURRY UP, HURRY UP, CAN'T WASTE TIME, : HURRY UP. CAN'T WASTE TIME, WHEN YOU'RE RACING HURRY UP, CAN'T WASTE TIME, WITH THE CLOCK, WHEN YOU'RE RACING HURRY UP, CAN'T WASTE TIME, WITH THE CLOCK. AND THE SECOND HAND HURRY UP, AND THE SECOND HAND DOESN'T UNDERSTAND, HURRY UP, DOESN'T UNDERSTAND, ALL THAT YOUR BACK MAY BREAK AND YOUR FINGERS ACHE, (SID enters with HINES from UR. They cross to UC) AND YOUR CONSTITUTION ISN'T MADE OF ROCK. (GIRLS stop suddenly) SID All right girls. Just a minute, Now listen to me. This is a nice little show you're putting on here but I don’t like it (HE crosses to L) My job is to turn out goods and that’s what we're gonna do. You have a contract — I didn’t make it but it's there.= FO = THE Pajama Game (SID) (Crosses R) I want a day’s work for a day's pay. I can still hire and fire around here, you know. Now let's go! EET ea ee OT (SID turns to.a BOY entering DR slowly, and the BOY moves faster. SID looks UL, DR, — cach time the work speeds up. As HE does this, BABE rises from her chair, makes up her mind and then sits down again, kicking her foot into the machinery as SHE does so, thereby causing a BREAKDOWN of entire line. A loud SOUND of grinding gears is heard. THE GIRLS all scream and jump away. SID turns. BABE is now standing) HINES Somebody jammed the line. sID Who did that? BABE Idid. sID (Pause) You're fired. BABE Lam? sip Yes. BABE That's fine, First vacation I've had in three years, I need one, (SHE turns to girls DL) —So long girls (Exits DL) sID (To BOY who is DL) Get Charley. We'll be operating again in fifteen minutes. Now clear out tll I call you back.ig ssi hia anime einai THE Pajama Game - 79 rigesuor es {ALL exit Land R. SID with switch) ses to broken machine. CHARLEY enters from UL. CHARLEY I've got a fuse and a switch, (HE or 880s to SC. The machine SID is working al suddenly EXPLODES) Boy! Look out, Didja get burnt? (SID has jumped back from machine, HE is LC) sID Yeah. (SID looks off in the direction zohich BABE has gone) Twice. CHARLI T'll fix it (CHARLEY crosses to machine and begins u Looks off L and sings:) king on it. SID crosses to DC. sID BETTER FORGET HER, HER WITH HER NOSE IN THE AIR. SHE HAS YOU DANCING ON A STRING, BREAK IT AND SHE WON'T CARE. WILL YOU TAKE THIS ADVICE I HAND YOU LIKE A BROTHER, OR ARE YOU NOT SEEING THINGS TOO CLEAR? ARE YOU TOO MUCH IN LOVE TO HEAR, IS IT ALL GOING IN ONE EAR AND OUT THE OTHER? CURTAIN- THe Pajama Game ACT 2 ia (Orchestra) ER te ef) | Scene 1 (EAGLE HALL, curtain opens, PREZ enters from R) PREZ (Crosses C) is is just going to be a short meeting because the Boiler Makers Local is got the I spoke for at 8 o'clock. So, them that wants to get over to the tri-Stage Meet will ve plenty of time. (Hands in pockets) rat's going on down to the plant you all know as good as 1. (Hands out of pockets) d any members of the type I run into from time to time who say “What good is union, why should I pay my dues?” Why they could get a mighty good object son from where would they be now in this here battle for the seven-and-a-half ts that they wouldn't get if it wasn’t for the union — “Pounds fist into hand) what sure as hell going to get it. Puts hands up to stop applause) leave us all remember that our union should be first and foremost in our minds, t only to our loved ones and the tiny tots and kiddies. Crosses R) w before we break up we are going to have a little entertainment and I hope you going to show a special courtesy tonight because a couple of the cutting room ss has got up an act with Gladys Hotchkiss who's from the front office. And if 3e good folk is good enough to come down here and do this act for us why the styou can do is not to sneak out the back way, like last time. The little number y worked up is something that’s right on the nose because it’s about getting hot 4 fellow union members that's what we're doing .. Motions banner flat U) setting hot.THE Pajama Game aa (Exits DR) (EAGLE HALL FLAT FLIES OUT) (GLADYS, HUTCHINSON and GENARRO are standing SC) = Steam Heat Cree TRIO (Hats out from chest and back again on end of “Steam") YEAH! 1GoT (large ag) *(The clang is produced in the vocal S-STEAM HEAT, chorus like a “cluck,” the tongue 1GOT hitting the roof of the mou (Clang clang) S-S-STEAM HEAT, Icor (Clang clang) ‘S-S-STEAM HEAT, BUT I NEED YOUR LOVE TO KEEP AWAY THE COLD. (Hats on heads — both hands holding — elbows out. Raise hats) 1GOT (Clang clang) S-S-STEAM HEAT, (Hats back on head and go L) 1cor (Clang clang) S-S-STEAM HEAT Icor (Clang clang) S-S-STEAM HEAT, BUT I CAN'T GET WARM WITHOUT YOUR HAND TO HOLD! (R arm high with hat — moving sideway: THE RADIATOR’S HISSIN’ STILL I NEED YOUR KISSIN’ ‘TO KEEP ME FROM FREEZIN’ EACH NIGHT!82 - The Pajama Game (Boom ba — extra knee clap — R hand on hat, L down) 1GOT A HOT WATER BOTTLE, BUT NOTHING I GOP'LL TAKE THE PLACE OF YOU, (RL step back, embrace self) HOLDING ME TIGHT. (Hat on head) 1GOT (Clang clang) S.S-STEAM HEAT, (Arm swings front and back) 1Gor (Clang clang) $-S.STEAM HEAT, 1GoT (Clang clang) S-S-STEAM HEAT, BUT I NEED YOUR LOVE TO KEEP AWAY THE COLD. (Hats on chest) (To Interlude — DANCE) (Instrumental) (Fiat trick #1) (Loose jointed step from L to R) TWO BOYS (Shoulders up and down turned in feet) THEY TOLD ME TO SHOVEL MORE COAL IN THE BOILER, THEY TOLD ME TO SHOVEL MORE COAL IN THE BOILER, THEY TOLD ME TO SHOVEL MORE COAL IN THE BOILER. (AIL on knees, arms front arsd back) GLADYS (On knees — DS = RC) BUT THAT DON'T DO NO Goob. (ALL crossing on knees far L) (Continue arm movement)sl ainsi Tur Pajama Game TWO BOYS THEY TOLD ME TO POUR SOME MORE OIL IN THE BURNER, (Walk on knees F) THEY TOLD ME TO POUR SOME MORE OIL IN THE BURNER, (Crossing on knees to L) THEY TOLD ME TO POUR SOME MORE OIL IN THE BURNER GLADYS BUT THAT DON’T DO NO Goop. (ALL get up RL, RL and go down again ~ Clap section for ALL) BOYS COAL IN THE BOILER— GLADYS NO Goop. BOYS OIL IN THE BURNER— GLADYS NO GOOD. ALL COLD NO. HOT— YES SSS. YES, YES, YES, COME ON UNION GET HOT. (More clap section and four steps going to SR on 2nd four orchestra joins — Dance ~ Drum section — Dance) ALL BOINK BOINK, BOINK BOINK BOINK BOINK BOYS 1 NEED YOUR LOVE TO KEEP AWAY THE COLD, NEED YOUR LOVE TO KEEP AWAY THE COLD, 5SSS. YEAH! (End of number, PREZ, joins them for bow. As THEY all exit DR - DIMOUT — DROPOUT) - 83- 64 - THE Pajama Game Scene 2 (THE KITCHEN. PREZ hias removed coat and thrown it over Morris chair. GROUP sitting around table. BABE goes to icebox and brings a bottle of beer. After she is seated, PREZ rises. MAE is drinking PREZ Listen, Mae, pay attention to the meeting and quit guzzling all this free beer. MAE Tain’t guzzling, I'm just being sociable. PREZ Well, this ain’t a sociable, this is an official meeting. BABE Mae's got to keep her strength up, PREZ We can’t just sit around here and do nothing, we got to make plans, Hasler ain't going to give in easy. BRENDA ‘We got the slow-down .. PREZ I mean other things, more like for instance, like why, a suggestion here from Jake Fondermeyer. He says when he was working at the Ironclad Overall Company and they was having trouble, why they spit tobacco juice in the back hip pockets of the overalls, MAE (Rises) I draw the line at chewing tobacco. PREZ I wasn’t suggesting that. (MAE sits) BRENDA, How about if the packers put the size large bottoms with the size small tops, and like that? JOE Sure PREZ Now that’s what I mean. That's constructive, ia: | ' THE PAJAMA Game (Phane rings — BABE rises, crosses to plione DR) (PREZ) That's clear thinking. BABE Hello ~ oh — sure. Sure I recognize your voice. MAE (Continuing the conversation so that they won't seem to be listening) But that wouldn't take effect soon enough. BRENDA ‘Well, I suppose not, BABE (in phone) Yes, Tam. PREZ (Crossing far L) Let's be practical. MAE (Tierns bottle upside down — empty. Rises) Oh, I'm going to break down and have another beer, (Crosses to icebox and gets beer) BABE (In phone) No, I can’t talk now, I've been away three days. MAE (Crosses back fo table) We got to put the screws on them right now, not later. (Sits) BABE (in phone) Look, Ihave several people here, It wouldn't do any good, anyhow. So goodbye, T'msorry. (SHE hangs up)aoe THE PAJAMA Game PREZ (From icebox — steps C) Babe, they've been saying (Turns to the other abruptly) Look, I don’t want to get Babe into trouble but BABE Go ahead. What trouble can you get me into? I'm fired already. (Sits) MAE Well the union ought to do something about that, too. PREZ Ifshe hadn't stood right up and said she did it, we could have. But if somebody up and admits they been bustin’ up the company property (Crosses R, leans into them at table) Listen, here’s a confidence just inside the committee. Some of the buttons ain't been sewed on too good. Wait until the salesmen come screaming back to Hasler. (POP enters UC) POP Hello. PREZ Mr. Williams. PoP Big meeting, hey. (To BABE) Hiya, honey. BABE Hiya, Pop. pop (Crossing 1) Don’t let me interrupt. BABE How was your trip? POP Dirty — got another hot box. On the siding for twenty-five minutes (Exit door L)THE PAJAMA Game PREZ Well, that's about it anyhow. (THEY all rise, PREZ crosses L. Gets coat from Morris chair) MAE Sure. (MAE gets handbag from end table — crosses to PREZ. Panttomimes conversation) JOE (Puts coat on from back of chair — crosses to BABE and BRENDA UR) And let's all be thinking about now ways to jam things up. BRENDA (Gets handbag, crosses UR to BABE) Much obliged for the beer. BABE (Crossing UR) That's all right. MAE What do you mean you got to go home. PREZ Listen Mae, my wife will be raising hell. MAE Too bad you didn’t think about that before. (Starts out) PREZ (Grabbing her arm) Look Mae, I'll take you home. MAE (Wrenches free) Don't bother! (SHE crosses to door and opens it) PREZ But Mae, there's prowlers out at this hour of the night. LEP- 88 = THe Payama Game MAE (Framed in open door) Single ones, I hope! (SHE exits followed by PREZ) BRENDA Come on, Joe. (THEY exit) POP (Enters from L. crosses to $C) Say, I stopped in down at the corner tavern for a beer just now and guess who Ian into. BABE (Crosses SC) Old man Hasler and Rita Hayworth? POP No, Sid. BABE Sid? What's he up to? (Crosses R) POP The way I got it, he just been phoning you or something of that kind. What happened between you? BABE (Crosses D, R of table) Never mind, Pop. pop That's what [ told Sid. I told him forget it and come on up. BABE (Turns to POP) Oh, Pop, you're too fresh. por That boy don’t feel good about something BABE Neither do 1illite THE PAJAMA Game (KNOCK on door ~ BABE crosses UR) ft eee ec (Orchestra) (Opens door, crosses to L) Come on in, Sid (SID in doorways stands and looks at them) BABE (With veiled sarcasm) Yes, do come in. (SID enters and closes door) POP Make yourself to home. (Crosses DL, exit) SID Have you really been away? BABE (Crosses D to LC) Sure. I went to Chicago to visit the Lincoln Park Zoo. sID (Crosses DC) Just because we're on different sides, is that any reason for you and me to get all balled up? BABE Looks like it, doesn’t it? sID Not to me it doesn’t. (Reaches for her. SHE pulls away, crosses behind Morris chair) What kind of a queen are you anyway? BABE (From beliind Morris Chair) Haven't you heard? I'm the sweetheart of Local 343 Associated Garment Workers of North America. My gosh, Sid, I warned you, I told you. You know? You know all about how I felt.90 — THe Pajama Game (BABE) (Step far L) Thappen to think there are certain things a person has to stand for in this life (SHE crosses below chair DL. Her back to hin) But I guess you forgot all about that. SID (Crosses near her) 1 forgot nothing, They pay me to run the factory. BABE (Turns to him) So run the factory. You stick to your side and I'll stick to mine. (Turns away again) sID (Step to her) Listen, Miss Williams. I love you. Comy ain’t it? Did you hear me? BABE (Nods) Yes sID (Steps back) Babe, can’t you see my side of it? I can’t fail at this. I was a cutting room foreman when I bluffed my way into this job andl I'm going to fight to stay here. And now. that I've got you in my plans — (HE tries to take her in his arms) I'm fighting even harder. BABE (Shakes his hands off) Watch those hands, tycoon. (POP enters from L with stamp album, SID cr BABE crosses ULC) isses to table R, sits chair L. PoP (Crossing R) Well, here we are,THE Pajama Game BABE (In front of window L) What you got there, Pops, your stamp album? POP (Stops) Now don’t get excited. If Sid doesn’t want to look at it, why he don’t have to. (Crosses to table R) No law against my looking at it, is there? (Clears table for album) BABE But Sid likes stamps. He told me so. Don’t you Sid? sID (Looking right at her) Yeah. I was looking at it the other night. POP (Puts album on table) Sure! There's universal appeal in stamps. I knew you'd be interested BABE Sid's very interested, Pop ... but me ... I’m just plain bushed. So, you don't mind if I slide off to bed? (Crosses to door L) PoP Run along, honey. Good night, dear sID Good night. Sleep well, BABE Thanks. (Hand on door knob ~ exits L) Por (Sits at chair R of table) Sid, suppose we start with the Pan American issue. 9192 - THE PajAMa GAME sID I guess that's as good a place to start off as any. (LIGHTS DIM DOWN. BABE appears at bedroom panel — steps DSL, Sing.:) BABE (Crosses DS) HEY THERE! YOU WITH THE STARS IN YOUR EYES, LOVE NEVER MADE A FOOL OF YOU YOU USED TO BE TOO WISE! HEY THERE! YOU ON THAT HIGH FLYIN’ CLOUD, THOUGH YOU'VE BEEN ACTING COLD TO HIM, YOU KNOW YOUR HEART IS SOLD TO HIM. (Looking R fowards kitchen) GET ON THE BALL, GIRL, JUST TAKE IT ALL IN YOUR STRIDE, DON’T LET HIM MAKE YOU FALL APART, YOU'VE ALWAYS HAD SUCH PRIDE WON'T YOU TAKE THIS ADVICE I HAND YOU LIKE A BROTHER? OR ARE YOU NOT SEEING THINGS TOO CLEAR? ARE YOU TOO MUCH IN LOVE? (Breaks down — cries — covers face with hands) (DIMOUT UNIT MOVES US. ELEVATOR DROP IN) Scene 3 (THE HALLWAY ANN, LINDA, CHARLENE enter L. CARMEN enter: SANDRA, DORIS follow) fast from R. PT ee ae ee ) ANN Hey Sarah, are you crazy? Slow down CARMEN Nobody's looking,THE Pajama Game ANN Here comes Mr. Hines. CARMEN Oh, excuse me (SHE suddenly goes into slow motion walk. HINES comes in and looks at the girls who are walking slowly) HINES Thate women, that’s what I do. Especially young flibberty gibbets. (GIRLS toss heads) Girls! Girls! (GIRLS stop walking, HINES paces L to R and back) You are a disgrace to my training, (From C) You are hurting my feelings (HE puts his arm over his eyes and the GIRLS rush to him in sympathy, THEY surround him) ANN Oh. Mr. Hines, we didn’t mean to hurt your feelings SANDRA Oh, I'm sorry. CARMEN It’s nothing personal, Mr. Hines. HINES Tt cuts, it cuts. I have a notion to throw away my stopwatch and give up. (Girls: Ad libs) Oh, no please don't do that. Oh, no, Heinzie! ANN We'd let you train us all over again. MAX (Enters DL) Where's Mr. Hasler? HINES thought you were in Peoria. 9394 - THE Pajama Game MAX (Crossing in front of SR) Task for Mr. Hasler and I get Peoria. Don't tell me you're part of this slowdown, Never mind, 1'll find him, HINES (Crossing R) Did you hear that? DORIS He seemed awfully upset. HINES (Crossing C) To accuse me of a slowdown — CARMEN Oh not you. HINES Me! Me! A man who has lived his life by the clock. CARMEN We're sorry, Mr. Hines. CHARLENE We'll be good! ALL GIRLS (Nod) Sure. UR ae ere HINES (Crossing from CR — strolling) I'M A TIME STUDY MAN, (GIRLS cross arms and step RL, 2nd pos 2) AND A TIME STUDY MAN CAN’T WASTE TIME. (Shakes head “no") FOR A TIME STUDY MAN TO WASTE TIME IS A CRIMETHE Pajama Game i (RLR. GIRLS turn around — shift weight, start Land R, GIRLS have hands behind them) HINES $0 I'M RULED BY THE TICK TICK TOCK. AND I LIVE MY LIFE BY THE CLOCK! LIVE. (Stop R) MY LIFE BY THE TICK TICK TOCK. (Three tiny knee bends) OF THE CLOCK, (GIRLS move into position. HINES sits on seat made of SANDRA and CARMEN backsides) WHEN 1GO TO SLEEP 1 DON’T UNDRESS. (Leans in on “undress”) OH YES, I SLEEP IN ALL MY CLOTHES I MUST CONFESS, (Back) YOU SAY A STRANGE WAY TO BEHAVE (GIRLS shake heads “Yes") WELL J WILL ADMIT THAT THE SUIT GETS MUSSED, AND IT GATHERS LINT AND IT PICKS UP DUST, BUT THINK OF THE TIME 1 SAVE! GIRLS THINK. (GIRLS fingers) OP THE TIME HE SAVES! (MUSIC. HINES does step turning to face GIRLS and around again to audience. GIRLS ob heads. HINES dances three 8's times 5. GIRLS on knees — 1-2 GIRLS ge! on knees — bow heads as HE passes. Shift into knee position again on 5. HE sits on bed) HINES THE ALARM CLOCK RINGS CHARLENE BRRRR! (HINES puts alarm off — pats head of GIRL) 9596 = Tne Payama Game HINES ITS6AM, AND THEN RIGHT THERE IN BED I SHAVE, (Leans in. Takes ANNE's arm, uses as razor strap) THAT'S WHAT I SAID. (Leans out) WHILE I AM STILLIN BED I SHAVE, (Nods “yes”) AND THE LATHER DRIPS AND THE BED GETS WET, AND, OH, WHAT A LOUSY (Gets up) SHAVE GET BUT THINK OF THE TIME I SAVE! (Fat) GIRLS (Fingers) ‘THINK OF THE TIME HE SAVES! (On knees ~ GIRLS up — 8 wait toes in ~ HINES and GIRLS dance — HINES goes back C and dances) GIRLS TICK TOCK, TICK TOCK, TEMPUS FUGIT. (GIRLS SR use R shoulder, GIRLS SL use L shoulder) TICK TOCK, TICK TOCK, TIME GOES BY. (Watch) HINES HOW I LOVE TO SIT AND WATCH THE SECONDS MULTIPLY. (Goes forward. Goes behind GIRLS C. GIRLS take positions feet apart, small steps) AT BREAKFAST TIME 1GRAB A BOWL. AND IN THE BOWL I DROP AN Et AND ADD SOME JUICE. (Leaning) A POOR EXCUSE FOR WHAT I CRAVE.THE Pajama Game (HINES) (Nods “yes") AND THEN I ADD SOME OATMEAL TOO — (Pause) AND IT COMES OUT TASTING JUST LIKE GLUE, BUT THINK OF THE TIME | SAVE! (Hat) GIRLS (SL use L finger. SR use R finger) THINK OF THE TIME HE SAVES! (GIRLS wait 4 fast counts or two slow ones. Drop hand sharply douwn. Go backwards 4 times 8 in 2nd position alternating foot) (HINES goes back Cand dances ~ Small Chaplin step L — up — slide on R — 2 steps — repeat — GIRLS) GIRLS TICK TOCK, TICK TOCK, TEMPUS FUGIT. TICK TOCK, TICK TOCK, TIME GOES BY. (Small Chaplin-like step on RL. lifted, faces front — repeat 4 times — Stop — lean in = SL backs to and close togetter. SR front to and same) HINES I'LL BE SITTING COUNTING SECONDS TILL THE DAY I DIE. (HINES comes forward) AND WHEN I DO, (GIRLS ~ bent over go to formation 4 group — 2 at ends) THAVE A PLAN. BEFORE I'M DEAD I'LL DIG MY GRAVE, (end girls SR and SL make grave) THAT'S WHAT I SAID. BEFORE I’M DEAD I'LL DIG MY GRAVE. (INES lies on grave) HINES "CUZ WHEN ST. PETER CALLS MY NAME, I KNOW I'LL GET THERE JUST THE SAME. BUT THINK OF THE TIME I'LL SAVE! (Hat) a =io THE PAJAMA GAME GIRLS THINK OF THE TIME. HE'LL SAVE! (GIRLS up and finger on “THINK") (GIRLS exit — Chaplin-like step large — face direction that they go. On R — L up. Exit 1. LYNDA, 2. ANN, 3. DORIS. (HINES tags on to CARMEN). 4, CHARLENE, 5. SANDRA, 6. CARMEN) (DIM OUT DROP OUT) Scene 4 (THE OFFICE Lights come up revealing MABEL seated at her desk L, reading her newspaper and SID at itis desk on the telephone. MABEL facing DS at desk) MABEL (Reading) “Teen Age Girl Confesses.” sID (In phone) Ican’t help it. It's the slowdown, MABEL “Teen Age Boy Attacks School Teacher.” Teh. Teh. Teh. sID They'll get the pajamas somewhere else if we don’t make deliveries, Well, that’s not my department. MABEL “Teen Age Sex Orgies Revealed.” Isn't that terrible? sID Yeah, they sure have more fun nowadays than when I was a kid (HASLER enters R, crosses to C) MABEL (Rises) Good morning, Mr. Hasler.THE Pajama Game HASLER (Crosses to MABEL) A slowdown like this proves what I've said for years, Nobody is interested in work MABEL That's right! (Turns to desk — turns chair in) HASLER (Crosses C) The whole country is on the skids. (SID rises) Here I am right now with employees openly defiant to top management. SID Look, Mr. Hasler. Maybe if we offered a compromise. (MABEL picks up papers) HASLER (Step to desk) Not until there's ice in hell three feet thick. (Hits desk) Tm a fighter, Sorokin. (HE assumes Jolin L. Sullivan pose) sID We've got hundreds of orders to get out . MABEL (Rises, gets a letter, crosses to HASLER) ‘That's right Mr. Hasler. Here’s a letter from Marx and Klein over to Fort Wayne, Indiana HASLER Marx and Klein? (Crosses DL) Damn chain outfit, Damned communists! Want another price cut I suppose. MABEL, (Crosses to him) Wells, they say unless we take care of this shipment go —100 Tue Pajama Game HASLER Now, Mabel, don’t stand there and try to tell me about Marx and Klein — dealing with them for twenty years, 've been MABEL, But Mr. Hasler, they say (Enter MAX R) MAX (Crosses to C) T've been looking for you, Mr. Hasler. HASLER Why aren't you out on the territory? What are you doing here? MAX Because of what happened in Peoria. HINES (Enters, distracted. Stands in door UR) ‘The elevator’s stuck. MAX Hey! You, Hines, what size are you? HINES Size? Me? What is this? (Crosses to C) The elevator is stuck. MAX You look like a medium. I need you. (MAX crosses to desk, opens box) HASLER (Crosses LC) What on earth is going on around here? MAX (Al desk, takes out suit of pajamas) Take your pants off. HINES (From C to MAX) Tl do no such thing,Tue Pajama Game MAX Mr. Hasler, this is life and death to the Sleep Tite organization. I want him to model these pajamas, HASLER Hines, take your pants off. HINES Okay, Chief. (HE starts to take off pants Me, honest? (Pulls them up again) MAX Come on, come on. MABEL Oh what a day. (Throws up hands — sits at her desk — covers face) HINES Yma very busy man. I'm a Time Study Man, not a model MAX This is all for Sleep Tite, Mister. HASLER Hines ... put those pajamas on. HINES Okay, Chiet. (HINES takes off his trousers and puts ther on chair UC) HASLER Hurry it up. (Crosses L) Let's get it over with, whatever it is. MAX (Opens pajama pants) Now Mr. Hasler I want you to get the picture (Gives pastts to HINES who puts them on) Iwas showing this to Charley Robertson of the Robertson Brothers. Now Tain’t one of your type salesmen that believes in half measures, Whenever [have a sample room I do just what we got Heinzie doing. I model the pants myself. 101102 ~ THE Pajama Game (By this time HINES is modeling the pajamas, HE lies on floor in various sleeping positions) HASLER Beautiful styling, What more do you want? (HINES rises, UC) (MAX steps SC) MAX Now wait ... here [am in Peoria and I'm modeling the pants. Mr. Robertson and his two buyers are very impressed with the line and ready to buy. Get the picture? HASLER Go on, go on. Thope there's some point to all this. MAX (Step to desk — pounds box) Hines, now take a deep breath, stick out your stomach, HINES This is truly ridiculous. MAX Everybody bear in mind I got these pajamas out of stock, right out of the box. Go on, Hines, breathe in. HASLER (Crosses to HINES) He said to breathe, Breathe. Let's get it over, (HINES takes a powerful breath. The pants fall) My God! (Crosses L) HINES Oh, I'm sorry. (HE starts to recover the pants) MAX No, leave ‘em lay, (GLADYS enters UL — sees HINES ~ screants and turns fo MABEL for protection) GLADYS What are you doing, Vernon? Playing games?THe Pajama Game MABEL (Rises, turns to GLADYS) Mr. Hines, really! sID (Crosses C) Let me see those. (HE grabs the pajamas, crosses back to desk, SR) MAX They're all like that. Every one, Boxes and boxes of them. HASLER What's the idea? Who did this? SID (Examining pants) Somebody's got quite a sense of humor. HASLER (Crosses R to desk) What the hell are you talking about? sID ‘Two threads in every waistband button. HASLER What? sID They're not sewed on. Only two threads. Somebody's being very cute HASLER (Takes pajaina pants, looks) Cute! Sabotage. Open rebellion! HINES (Crosses to HASLER — GLADYS cr ses to chair UC, gets HINES’ trousers) On the other hand, it might be just coincidence. HASLER Oh, put your pants on. (HINES crosses US) 103104 — THE PAJAMA GAME GLADYS (Gives trousers to hin backwards, Aside to Irim) What did you do, Vernon? HINES (Putting pants on backwards) I didn’t do anything, sID (In the phone) Gimme the stock room. MAX (Crosses to MABEL and turns) Il be the laughing stock of the pajama game. (HINES zips where there is no zipper. Takes pants off, puts them on correctly. GLADYS grabs to help. HINES pushes her hand away. Turns back to audience) MABEL You never finished your story. What did this Robertson do when your pants fell down? MAX He laughed. No sense of humor. HINES (To GLADYS, who has tried to help him — in the laughter of audience) Keep your hands off me sID (In phone) Hold the orders till we've checked the stock. I'l be right down. (To MAX) ‘Come on, Max. (HINES is having trouble with zipper — still has back to audience as HE tugs at it. MAX exits followed by SID SR) HASLER (Crosses to Mabel SL, as he passes HINES, GLADYS again grabs HINES’ pants to help) ‘They think they can lick Myron Hasler with this sort of trickery they got another guess coming. I'ma fighter. Damn Communists.THe Pajama Game a (HASLER) (To HINES) Hines! Get dressed, you idiot. I want a time report on each individual worker. (HINES turns to HASLER — has caught L cuff in zipper ~ HASLER fumes — GLADYS makes last grab — HINES crosses to door R helpless — hits wall frustratedly — walks into clothes rack ~ exits, HASLER follows, then sits at desk R, helplessly) MABEL, (Gets letter, $ to Haster) Now, Mr. Hasler, in this letter from Marx and. Klein, they say HASLER Don't bother me with letters from Marx and Klein or anybody else. MABEL Well HASLER Especially Marx and Klein, those damn pirates, (MABEL shrugs, crosses back to desk, sits. HASLER, to GLADYS) Gladys, don’t forget I've got a meeting of the Board of Directors tomorrow. (Head in hands) GLADYS (Crosses to him) Yes sir. The books are all ready except — HASLER Two threads, that’s what I got to tell them. Two threads. sID (Enters R. Crosses in front of GLADYS and HASLER to DL) We've got to recall an awful lot of orders HASLER (Rising) How many? sID They're gonna let us know. HASLER Gladys, give me your entry (GLADYS gives him ledger) 105106 ~ THE Pajama GAME SID Clear out for a while will you Mabel? MABEL (Picking up her belongings, rises and crosses to door saying:) Oh sure, Ill get something to sete my stomach, (SHE exits) HASLER (Writes notation, gives it to GLADYS along with ledger) Have it ready for the meeting tomorrow, that’s all. (GLADYS exits R. HASLER starts to crosses UR) SID Mr. Hasler. HASLER (Stops) Yeah? sID I'd like to make a pitch. HASLER Pitch? All right. Pitch ahead. sID (Crossing slowly to HASLER) Before we get started let me make my position clear. (Crossing R) I'm for the company first, last, and always, But labor problems have got to end up in one way ... compromise, HASLER (Turns to him) Sorokin, you've been around here long enough to learn something (Turns 1) But you seem a little slow. I'm a fighter. (HE demonstrates John L. Sullivan style) Keep your dukes up, boy. (Throws door open)THE Pajama Game sID Yes, but ... HASLER (Turns to SID) Don't waste your breath on me. Keep your dukes up. (HE exits, As HE is saying his last tine, GLADYS enters from R with ledger) GLADYS Dukes up? What does that mean? SID (Crosses DS of desk R) Mr, Hasler wants me to take boxing lessons. GLADYS (Crosses DC) You certainly are a character. sID (Sits on desk, turns to her.) And I'd like to get some information from you too. GLADYS What kind? SID Double entry. GLADYS Well, you're not going to get any information, so there. sID Come here. I'ma desperate man and I hate to ask a cute kid like you to do me a favor but .. GLADYS (Sits beside him at his desk) Sid dear, you wouldn't have me violate a trust would you? SID Tsure would, If it would help to unsnarl things around here. GLADYS Why is that so important? 107 —108 — THe Payama Game sID (Leans over her) Because my future depends upon the titanic struggle for pajama survival GLADYS (Laughs) You're a scream. sID And I just feel that if I knew a little more about the bookkeeping of this .. (Motions to ledger SHE carries) GLADYS (Quickly crosses C) Oh no, not that. sID Oh, I wouldn't ask you to show it to me. Just leave it around. GLADYS No. Besides it’s locked anyhow. sID T know a sexy dame who'd lend me the key. GLADYS (Crosses to hirn) Oh, you think so? sID Wells, it would be fun trying to persuade her. GLADYS (Sits on side of desk) Well, it might be fun to be persuaded — only you'd be awfully sore when you didn’t getit. sID Oh, no Gladys, I'm grown up. GLADYS Quit kidding me. (Looks into his eyes. Gets up suddenly) Well, I got to go. (SHE crosses to door UL)THE Pajama Game = 109 = sID No, wait GLADYS (Stops. Turns challengingly) What? SID (Rises, crosses C) Let's go out tonight. GLADYS (Crosses to him) Well, [hope you're not serious about that key. sID I don't feel like being serious about anything, You're busy, huh? GLADYS (Crosses around him) No, and I sure would like to, but — (Puts ledger on his desk) Oh, gee. Where will you take me? SID Any place you say. GLADYS T know a wonderful joint! (Motions him to come to her) (DIM our TRAVELER CLOSES DROP IN) Scene 5 (THE SWATCH TRAVELER) LG ee GLADYS I KNOW A DARK SECLUDED PLACE, (Front C, gives R hand) APLACE WHERE NO ONE KNOWS YOUR FACE,To THe Pajama GAME (GLADYS) (L hand. Embrace) AGLASS OF WINE, (Looks out ~ squirts) A FAST EMBRAC (GLADYS embraces SID) IT’S CALLED HERNANDO'S HIDEAWAY! O-LAY! (GLADYS takes Spanish arm position, then recovers. Crosses with SID to C) ALL YOU SEE ARE SILHOUETTES, (L hand out — pulls her with R) AND ALL YOU HEAR ARE CASTANETS. (Throws her arms high) AND NO ONE CARES HOW LATE IT GETS, NOT AT HERNANDO’S HIDEAWAY! O-LAY! (They dance down C) AT THE GOLDEN FINGERBOWL OR ANY PLACE YOU GO— (Dance L) YOU WILL MEET YOUR UNCLE MAX AND EV’RYONE YOU KNOW. (SID goes backwards — then GLADYS follows, facing hisn) BUT IF YOU ARE SITTING CLOSE AND MAKING LOVE TO ME, YOU MAY TAKE MY HEART, YOU MAY TAKE MY SOUL, BUT NOT MY KEY! (TRAVELER opens — Reveals BLACK DROP) JUST KNOCK THREE TIMES AND WHISPER LOW— (GLADYS pushes SID off SL) THAT YOU AND I WERE SENT BY JOE, THEN STRIKE A MATCH AND YOU WILL KNOW, YOU'RE IN HERNANDO’S HIDEAWAY! O-LAY!! (GLADYS pulls key out — SID reaches for it - GLADYS takes key from SID and puts it down dress and pats chest. THEY exit L. PETE’s entrance ~ MIDGET ~ couple of drunks — 3 couples)Tut Pajama Game Hideawy Dance BOB, JIM, DALE (Of L) Joe sent us, (DROP LIGHTS UP — DROP OUT IN DARK) Scene 6 (HERNANDO’S HIDEAWAY Scene is in dark. NOTE: In directions when “Match” is indicated, the performer strikes a large match) GIRL Ooo0oh — (Laugh ~ Slap) Fresh! 1ST BOY Who's that? 2ND BOY (Match) Poopsie — Poopsie — Poopsie! (Into booth L, match before last “Poopsie”) 3RD BOY Hey, buddy, dis ain’t Poopsie! 1ST GIRL (Match — L to C) I KNOW, A DARK SECLUDED PLACE, 2ND GIRL (Match ~ R to C) APLACE WHERE NO ONE KNOWS YOUR FACE, 3RD GIRL (Match — R to C) A GLASS OF WINE, A FAST EMBRACE. ALL THREE IT’S CALLED HERNANDO’S HIDEAWAY — O-LAY! (Blow out matches)eee THe Pajama Game (THREE KNOCKS — SID and GLADYS enter in dark ~ Sit C) VOICES Joe sent us! ALL Sch ssssh! 2ND BOY (Match) Poopsie, Poopsie. (Crosses L to R) 1ST GIRL (Lights match, sings) AT THE GOLDEN FINGER BOWL OR ANY PLACE YOU GO- (MUSIC — BOY slides forward on stomach with match) 1ST BOY (Match ~ sings:) YOU WILL MEET YOUR UNCLE MAX AND EVERYONE YOU KNOW. (MUSIC — BOY lights match from on top of juke box) 2ND BOY (Maich — sings: BUT IF YOU GO TO THE SPOT THAT I AM THINKING OF, 1ST GIRL YOU WILL BE FREE (Lights match) 2ND BOY TO GAZE AT ME, (Lights match) ALL AND TALK OF— (Light matches) LOVE! (ALL come forward slowly in long line across front, matches are all lit)THE PAJAMA Game (ALL) JUST KNOCK THREE TIMES AND WHISPER LOW, THAT YOU AND I WERE SENT BY JOE, THEN STRIKE A MATCH AND YOU WILL KNOW (Blow out matches. LIGHTS UP) YOU'RE IN HERNANDO’S HIDEAWAY. (Lean on L foot front, L hand at mouth) Ovayit (Slow movement with L arm L) (MUSIC — BOOM — ALL in Spanish poses. MUSIC — run into boots, some exit, etc. SID and GLADYS are revealed at table SC) GLADYS I want to ask you a personal question, Sid. Do you like Scotch? sID No. Gladys, I don’t like Scotch. GLADYS Neither do I. Scotch has a very peculiar taste (WAITER enters from L with tray, crosses to table C) sID Kind of a scotch-like taste? GLADYS Yeah, that’s it. Count me out (To WAITER) Is that gin? WAITER Yes, Ma'm GLADYS (Gulps it down — makes an ugly face) You're right. (GUESTS step DR from booths and tables and mill around, WAITER exits R) You know I can't figure you out, Sid. I guess when you first came here, you caught on that I thought you were cute, but you never gave me a tumble till tonight, sID Ttold you what I was up to didn’t I? 113— 414 - THE PAJAMA Game GLADYS 1 forget. Tell me again. sID T'm gonna get you fried and get that key away from you GLADYS (Singing — to far end of room) You'll never get my key. You'll never get my key (JUKE BOX starts to play) Pelee Pie SID Shhhh. They'll hear you — GLADYS You think I'm terrible, don’t you? (BABE and PREZ enter DR. BABE Crosses UR) GIRL Hey! I thought you was at the bowling alley. PREZ (Crosses SRC) ‘We was. GIRL Who won? PREZ (Turn R) Babe wanted to come here. BABE (Crossing DR) I gotta give a message to somebody. (PEOPLE block her vision — and SHE doesn''t see SID) PREZ ‘We was gonna get thrown out anyways. Heinzie came in drunk and started raising aruckus, (Crosses R, sits)THE PAJAMA Game ANOTHER GIRL Did you bowl good, Babe? BABE No. this wasn’t my night. (Crosses L, sees SID and GLADYS) GLADYS Come on, let’s dance, (Gets up from table — crosses near $ID, holds arms out invitingly) GIRL Babe, — you're coming to the Union Rally aren’t you? (SID rises, sees BABE's back, sits suddenly) BABE (Crosses R) ‘Well sure — what do you think? GLADYS What's the matter, Sid? sip I don't feel so good GLADYS You're sick, you mean? sID Not sick — just kind of depressed, GLADYS Oh look — don’t be repressed. (Takes key from around her neck) Wait a minute — look what I'm giving you. There it is — (Waves key in front of him) — See? (Crosses L, sits) Take it. sID This is a lousy trick, Gladys. GLADYS Ti just lend it to you. But don't tell anybody, and you gotta give it back in the morning. 115ier THE Pajama Game (BABE crosses to their table) sID Thanks a halluva lot GLADYS Now you gonna cheer up, Sid (Leans toward him. Sees BABE) Hi, Babe. sID (Rises) Yes, hello, GLADYS Sid and I are just old friends. sip Won't you join us? BABE No, thank you. Gladys! I just came to tell you that Heinzie’s out for blood. GLADYS Oh, Heinzie! BABE He came over to the bowling alley looking for you, He knows you're out with Sid and he's got a knife. sID The damn fool GLADYS He's ahways got a knife. He's living in the past. That's not healthy, do you think so, Sid? BABE Look, I didn’t come here to be funny, and I don’t come here because I'm craving, your company or wanting to join your party or anything like that. I came here to tell you he's dangerous. GLADYS He talks dangerous, but he isn’t. I think I'll take a nap. (SHE pruts her head on the table. BABE turns, crosses to exit) sID Babe, please — (Tries to stop her steps R — sees PREZ)Tue Pajama Game aes GLADYS (Lifts head) ‘Oh, dear, a fallen woman — that's what ] am , [ost my key. (Puts head back on table) sID (Crosses back to C) Y'm gonna get Prez to take you home. Is that all right? GLADYS (Looks up) If Mr. Hasler ever finds out sID He won't find out. GLADYS I can't face myself. I better take another nap. (Drops head again) SID (Crosses to PREZ taking money out of his pocket) Prez, (PREZ rises) — pay up for me and take Gladys home, will ya? PREZ Gladys? (Crosses C) Oh, sure, sure, Sid. Glad to. SID Y've got some important bookkeeping to do. (Exiting R) PREZ (To GLADYS) Her is the cutest one GLADYS (Raises head) I remember you (Drops head)age THE Pajama Gane PREZ 5, you know it? Her is the cutest, MAE (Pops up from booth behind them — sticks head through lattice) No, him is the cutest. (PREZ rises) MAE You cornfed Romeo! I know what goes with you all right, all right! (SHE starts after PREZ, who crosses R) You snake in the grass. It doesn't matter to you if you break a person's heart I'll claw your eyes out. (Chases him out R) GLADYS (Applauds) Encore encore (Puts head back on table; HINES enters from UL, drunk, crosses to L of GLADYS, stamps feet three times, drops knife) ‘Oh, T see you. You don’t need to drop anything. (WAITER strikes chair R) HINES (Picks up knife) You abandoned woman — you hussy. GLADYS (Rises, crosses DC) After the way you behaved. (WAITER strikes table to R) Taking your pants off in Mr. Hasler, office (HINES puts his arm around her shoulders. SHE pushes hisn atony) Don't touch me! Prez will see me home.THE PAjAMA Game - 119 - (GLADYS) (Crosses to R, staggering, and stops) And I'm glad I neyer married you! (Exits R) Let e ML ae Te La ee) eres) eyo) HINES Prez, Sid, Tom, Dick, Harry — (MUSIC. HINES staggers back U to chair C, falls into it) Tcan see what marriage with Gladys would be like (HIDEAWAY set divides, opening full stage to reveal BEDROOM) Scene 7 (BEDROOM HINES sits brooding on chair C, GLADYS enters DR dressed in a cheesy bathrobe, with curlers in Her hair. Ske isa terrible sight, HINES pantomimes husband going to work, leaving her to scrub floor. After HE exits, SHE is galvanized into action. There is a signal from a moosehead that @ man is appronching. SHE takes off her robe and curlers, puts on a glamorous negligee and awaits the arrival of a debonair FRENCHMAN in striped pants. This is HINES again. THEY dance around, making Soolish love. The moosehead lights up again, and SHE stuffs the FRENCHMAN into her wardrobe closet SHE goes back and lies down on the bed. WRESTLER (kind of a Gorgeous George, also HINES) enters. THEY wrestle, Moosehead lights up, and SHE stuffs him into wardrobe also. SHE dons her frumpy bathrobe and curlers, starts to scrub floor. Her husband (HINES) arrives, goes to closet. FRENCHMAN takes his hat and case from him. HINES does a doubletake, wrenches open wardrobe door, and MEN comie plummeting out. Dance around Gladys, pick her up — move SR) DROP COMES IN ADYS does “strip in front of it. HINES appears — then MABEL dressed in angel's costume and throws arms around him.) HINES IT WOULD TRUST HER, I WOULD TRUST HER, BY GEORGE I SWEAR I WOULDf= Tur PAJAMA Game (HE breaks down and cries on Mabel’s shoulder. BOYS carry GLADYS ODL. HINES {follows with over-sized knife. MABEL, as angel, runs behind. BLACKOUT) Scene 8 (THE OFFICE SID sitting at desk R with GLADYS’ ledger. CHARLEY enters from R) CHARLEY (fn door) Sid. sID "Morning, Charley. CHARLEY (Crosses to behind SID) There's a committee from the union downstairs waiting to see you. sID Yeah, I sent for them CHARLEY (Steps to L of him — looks aver his shoulder) You been here all night? (Crosses to door L) sID ‘That's no joke Charley, [have (Closes ledger. Picks up telephone) Vd like to speak to Mr. Hasler, please. (To CHARLEY) And what's mote I think I've got something, (At door L) CHARLEY Take it easy, boy. (HE exits L) ai sID (in phone) Mr. Hasler,THE PAJAMA Game - 121 (SID) (Rises) — Could you come down to the office right away? (KNOCK) Come in, (In phone) It’s pretty important. Thanks. (Door opens and PREZ, JOE and BABE enter R) Come on in, please. (PREZ steps to desk, JOE, US of him, BABE last, closes door, DS) Sorry to have to drag you out so early but I knew you were having a union rally and T wanted to talk to you first. PREZ That's okay, Sid. sID I think I've got hold of some facts that may clean up this mess, PREZ ‘Well, it better be quick. Bither we get the seven-and-2-half cents or we strike. JOE You're damned right. sID What I want to askis, will you, keep your rally going till I get there and talk to you? PREZ What about? sID About solving this damned thing, BABE There ought to be a time limit. sID All right, you're going to have a parade. JOE We sure are. sID That'll give me time. Ill be at the rally,pone THE Pajama Game PREZ That's fair enough. (THEY start out) sID Oh, Miss Williams, can I speak to you? PREZ We'll wait for you downstairs, Babe, (Motions JOE out of door R ~ follows. BABE looks at SID, crosses DS of desk) #22 — Hey There Incidental i SID (Meeting her) 1 know explanations are lousy. BABE (Starting to go) Oh, no Sid I SID (Grabs her, puts her in chair L of desk) Babe, please! You've got to let me explain. BABE I don’t want an explanation. It's humiliating. (Rises ~ crosses R) sID But you mustn’t think BABE I don’t think anything. I don’t care. (Turns to him) Sid, if i's about you and Gladys, it’s none of my business. s1p But it is your business, BABE (Crosses DR) Oh the hell with that. I'm talking about something bigger.ous THe Pajama Game (SID) (Rushes ~ Crosses to door) Heinzie, you damn fool! (Looks at GLADYS) Whey! GLADYS Itold you I heard something. sID (Crosses back to GLADYS) You heard something all right. Well, I'm glad he's got that out of his system. GLADYS (Rises) How do we know that he has? How do we know — sID (Goes to her) Now, Gladys, cut it out. (Takes her by shoulders) W's going to be all right. Now you — (CLUNK. Another knife flies through the air and sticks in the desk near SID. GLADYS screams and ducks. SID jumps) GLADYS (Crouching by desk SL) You've got to stop him. sID Vl fix that baby. (Picks up a window opener for a club and stalks toward door R. HASLER enters opposite side) HASLER (Crosses to desk R) Thope this call turns out to be important (HASLER is arrested by SID’s attitude with club) What's going on here? (Sees knife in wall) Now look! Look! That's not nice. I don’t like this,THe Pajama GAME (HASLER) (Turns to SID) This is company property, Sorokin. SID (Crosses back to C) Vd better explain, Mr, Hasler, HASLER I think somebody better GLADYS (Screanting) Look out! (CLUNK. Another knife just misses HASLER) HASLER What the hell! (GLADYS jumps half behind file cabinet — Crouches low. SID crosses back C, back to wall, HASLER ducks behind chair at desk L) ‘They're trying to murder me! sID (Exits R) Til stop that. (HE dashes out after HINES) HASLER (Hiding beltind chair) Call Senator Hickenlooper. GLADYS Yes, Sir! (Reaches for phone on desk L) HASLER It's plot to murder me! They've imported gangsters from Chicago! The old Al Capone gang, GLADYS (Holding phone) I don’t think so, Mr. Hasler. ~ 4125 -=P = THe Pajama GAME HASLER Don’t argue with me! Didn't you see those knives! That's the work of foreigners! (OFFSTAGE MUSIC: “Seven-and--half Cents" — one-and-a-half choruses — fade out) Fi GLADYS But, Mr. Hasler. HASLER (Pounding chair) It's Chicago gangsters! GLADYS Mr. Hasler, it's — HASLER (Hears singing) They're marching, What's that? GLADYS No, it’s the Union Rally. They're going to have a parade. (SID comes in leading HINES by the arm. HE carries a broken window opener in the other hand. HINES has a bruise on his forehead. HE holds handkerchief to it) HASLER (Crosses C) Hines, where have you been? On the job, man. The place is full of gangsters. They're out to get me. sID (Lets HINES go — HINES crosses L, glares at GLADYS) ‘They're not after you, Mr. Hasler. They're after me. HASLER (Crosses to SID's desk) Talk, talk, Why doesn’t someone do something? (HE grabs the telephone. In phone) Get me the police. sID (Crosses to R of HASLER. Taking the phone away from him and hanging up — puts window pole om desk) You don’t want to arrest Hines, do you?THE Pajama Game se es HASLER Hines? sID He was trying to kill me HASLER He was? (Turns to HINES) Hines, suppose you'd succeeded, and me right in the middle of labor troubles. Suppose you'd hit him. HINES Tcould have hit him if wanted to. I was just trying to scare him. (Hangs his head, ashamed) HASLER (To SID) Is this what you called me about, to come here and risk my life? sID No! HASLER (Looks at HINES and GLADYS) I don’t want to be involved in these personal matters, sID Tealled you because there’s going to be a strike this morning unless you listen to me. HASLER [told you that I'm a fighter. SID Soam I HASLER What? SID Gladys, have his head patched up GLADYS (Crosses to HINES, takes his arm. Holding the door) Allright, Vernon.i28 THE Pajama Game HINES (Pulling away) Take your hands off me ~ I'ma fighter, [ am! GLADYS Come on, Tiger! (GLADYS and HINES go out L — HASLER looks after them) sID Mr: Hasler, I'm going before the Board of Directors. HASLER (Turning) You are what? sID If can't solve this any other way. HASLER Solve what? (Crosses LC) Sometimes I think ... sID (Picks up ledger) I’ve been up all night with your ledger: HASLER (Turns) What did you say? sID J apologize. I know you didn’t hire me as a safe-cracker, but I had to get some facts. T've been through your books. HASLER (Crosses to desk R) You mean to say that you ... ? sID ‘That seven-and-a-half cents was added to the cost six months ago. HASLER Tcan put you in jail, that’s what I can do. Put you in jail!THE Pajama Gamer tes sID No, you can’t (Puts book down) But you can give that raise, if you don’t, I'l go before the board and tell them the situation and tell them how many orders have been cancelled. HASLER Not one damn order — SID (Crosses to HASLER) Read your mail. There’s a dozen cancellations. Mabel’s tried all day yesterday to tell you about Marx and Klein. (HASLER turns front) And if this operation folds up I fold with it, And I don’t want to, so do me a favor. {SID pushes chair under HASLER) Sit down and talk to me. (BLACKOUT. TRAVELER CLOSES BLACK DROP IN) Scene 9 (SWATCH TRAVELER BRENDA and FOUR OTHERS discovered on stage, during dinlogue, stage gradually fills) Pe eee cmon Gea TomuLnetia BRENDA Sure, Hasler was in Sorokin's office when we marched by the factory. Now he'll know we mean business. FIRST GIRL Here comes Prez. (PREZ enters DR tearing a blue ribbon. Crosses LC) BRENDA (Crosses to Prez) Hey, why ain’t you in the parade, Prez? (MAE has entered DL)Tue Pajama Game PREZ don’t want to get out of breath before making my speech. FIRST BOY his will wake them up. PREZ (Turns to MAE) imy ribbon straight? MAE don’t know, ask your wife. BRENDA (Crosses between PREZ and MAE) ‘e’re sure to win ain’t we, Prez? (BABE enters DL) PREZ ‘hat kind of question is that? Sure we are. (POOPSIE enters) tbe will tell you BABE (Crosses LC) te answer is yes ~ that's the answer to everything today. What is it? BRENDA ast asked are we going to win the strike BABE (Crosses C) te we're going to win and that aint all. PREZ 2e and me was up half the night figuring things out. I got it all written down on paper. BRENDA tat do you mean., Prez? PREZ 1 FIGURED IT OUT, 1 FIGURED IT OUT, WITH A PENCIL AND A PAD I FIGURED IT OUT Waves pencil in R hand, pad in L)THE PAJAMA GAME 131 (PREZ) SEVEN AND A HALF CENTS DOESN'T BUY A HELLUVA LOT. SEVEN AND A HALF CENTS DOESN'T MEAN A THING. BUT GIVE IT TO ME EV'RY HOUR, FORTY HOURS EV’RY WEEK, AND THAT'S ENOUGH FOR ME TO BE LIVIN’ LIKE A KING, I FIGURED IT OUT. (Begins to cross L to R) ALL HE FIGURED IT OUT. PREZ 1 FIGURED IT OUT. (Goes L to R) ALL HE FIGURED IT OUT, PREZ WITH A PENCIL AND A PAD I FIGURED IT OUT. ONLY FIVE YEARS FROM TODAY, ONLY FIVE YEARS FROM TODAY, TCAN SEE IT ALL BEFORE ME. ONLY FIVE YEARS FROM TODAY. (Spoken) Only five years — (BABE next to PREZ. PREZ starts slowly down to knees — figures on floor. ALL gather around and lean over him) That's two hundred and sixty weeks ... times forty hours every week and roughly two and a quarter hours overtime at time and a half for overtime ... Comes to exactly — (ALL look at PREZ) Eight hundred and fifty-two dollars and seventy-four cents, (Lifts head) ALL Hooray! (Break away — bodies up and arms shoot out)132 = THe PAJAMA GaMe PREZ THAT'S ENOUGH FOR ME TO GET AN AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINE, (Reclining on floor face SR) A YEAR'S SUPPLY OF GASOLINE, CARPETING FOR THE LIVING ROOM. i 3 GIRLS ‘A VACUUM INSTEAD OF THE BLASTED BROOM PREZ NOT TO MENTION A FORTY INCH TELEVISION SET. (Rises up half way) ALL SO- ALTHOUGH. (March, change places. BABE, PREZ, SARA link arms and skip to SL) SEVEN-AND-A-HALF CENTS DOESN'T BUY A HELLUVA LOT. SEVEN-AND-A-HALF CENTS DOESN'T MEAN A THING. BUT GIVE IT TO ME EV'RY HOUR, FORTY HOURS EV’RY WEEK, AND THAT'S ENOUGH FOR ME TO BE LIVIN’ LIKE A KING. BABE I FIGURED IT OUT ALL SHE FIGURED IT OUT. (ALL point to BABE) SHE FIGURED IT OUT. (Pointing with one arm) BABE I FIGURED IT OUT, WITH A PENCIL AND A PAD I FIGURED IT OUT. ONLY TEN YEARS FROM TODAY, ONLY TEN YEARS FROM TODAY, I CAN SEE IT CLEAR AS DAYLIGHT, ONLY TEN YEARS FROM TODAY, (Spenks) Ten years... now, let’s see.THE Pajama Game (BABE) (Picks up PETE, leans on his back and figures) That's five hundred and twenty weeks— times forty hours every week and roughly wo and a quarter... Comes to exactly one thousand seven hundred and five dollars and forty-eight cents. ALL Hooray! (BABE is lifted by 3 BOYS) BABE THAT'S ENOUGH FOR ME TO BUY ATRIP TO FRANCE ACROSS THE SEAS, A MOTORBOAT AND WATER SKIS, MAYBE EVEN A FOREIGN CAR. 3 MEN A CHARGE ACCOUNT AT THE CORNER BAR. BABE NOT TO MENTION A SCRABBLE BOARD WITH LETTERS MADE OF GOLD. (THEY put BABE down) ALL (GROUP 1) ALL (GROUP 2) SO— ALTHOUGH... (March, change places) WE FIGURED IT OUT. SEVEN-AND-A-HALF CENTS WE FIGURED IT OUT. DOESN'T BUY A HELLUVA LOT. WE FIGURED IT OUT. SEVEN-AND-A-HALF CENTS WE FIGURED IT OUT DOESN'T MEAN A THING. I FIGURE THAT BUT GIVE IT TO ME EV’RY HOUR, GIVE IT TO ME EWRY HOUR, ALL FORTY HOURS EV’RY WEEK, AND THAT'S ENOUGH FOR ME TO BE LIVIN’ LIKE A KING. PREZ WE FIGURED IT OUT, ALL THEY FIGURED IT OUT. (On 1 knee, point 1 arm) csost THE Pajama Game (ALL) THEY FIGURED IT OUT (ALL up, point 1 arm) PREZ & BABE WE FIGURED IT OUT (Meet arid shake hands in C and go out again — SHER — HEL) PREZ & BABE (+ALL) WITH A PENCIL AND A PAD WE FIGURED IT OUT. BABE ONLY TWENTY YEARS FROM TODAY — ALL DOOOAH! (Lea R) PREZ ONLY TWENTY YEARS FROM TODAY — ALL DOOOAH! BABE I CAN SEE IT LIKE A VISION. ALL HM, é ONLY TWENTY YEARS FROM TODAY. 00, 00, 00, 00. PREZ Twenty years, Now, let's see, That's one thousand — (HE is lifted by BOYS) And forty weeks... fs BABE Times forty hours ev'ry week... (Lifted by boys) PREZ And roughly two and a quarter hours overtime at BABE Time and a half for overtime..THE PAJAMA Game 135 — PREZ Comes to exactly. BABE Three thousand four hundred and eleven dollars... (Face front, both hands on head) PREZ And ninety-six cents, (Face front — bot! hands on read) ALL (On knees) Wow! (BABE and PREZ fall — sideways back and are cought by BOYS) PREZ THAT'S ENOUGH FOR ME TO BE ASULTAN IN A TA] MAHAL. IN EV'RY ROOM A DIFFERENT DOLL. BABE Y'LL HAVE MYSELF A BUYIN’ SPREE, TLL BUY A PAJAMA FACTORY. THEN I COULD END UP HAVIN’ OLD MAN HASLER WORK FOR ME. ALL SO ALTHOUGH... SEVEN-AND-A-HALF CENTS DOESN'T BUY A HELLUVA LOT. SEVEN-AND-A-HALF CENTS DOESN'T MEAN ATHING, BUT GIVE IT TO ME EVRY HOUR, FORTY HOURS, EV’RY WEEK, AND THAT'S ENOUGH FOR ME TO BE... (On 1 knee = arms low open. BOYS bend knees and slowly up, use arms as GIRLS pulsate arms — higher and higher into pose on specific count) : LIVIN’ LIKE A KING! (BABE lifted on 5 to 2 BOYS, BOYS catch GIRLS, om too open arms — diagonally inside arm — SR—L high, SL—R high. PREZ on floor at BABE's fet, L arm high)136 — THe Pajama Game (SID enters from L, makes way D LC, HINES sneaks on behind him and lies unseen behind chorus) SID Prez. PREZ Yeah? SID We can settle this strike, PREZ Well, how? SID Sleep Tite can offer you a compromise PREZ What? sID Mr. Hasler will give you the seven-and-a-half cents if you give up your claims for retroactive pay. MAE We ain't giving up nothing. (BABE crosses DC) PREZ Now wait... Sid ... I don’t know. BABE Well, I do. Let's get it over. We've won, ALL We've won! We've won! JOE (Runs in R) Hasler’s talking. He's at the rally CROWD Hooray! PREZ Come on. eee ee (or| THE Pajama Game Aer an (THE CROWD rushes out R, trampling HINES. SID and BABE look at each other and then SID wordlessly passes her to DR) HINES (Rises) told you this show was full of symbolism. BABE (Turning) Sid (Runs after him) Icould kiss you, you've been wonderful (SHE puts her arms around his neck) sID (Taking them away) I don’t want to be kissed for settling a strike (Smiles at her) OF course, if it’s anything personal — Ec ccc aaee Gia BABE Oh, very personal. (THEY kiss) HINES Embarrassing I call it. (Sits in foots) BABE Tove you. sID (Backing La step) Tell me. BABE Hove you SID Tell me.ae Tove you. Tell me more. What a man, I'll tell you, (Sin; Tue Pajama Game BABE BABE BABE MORE THAN A LION LOVES HER CUB, MORE THAN A LIMEY LOVES HIS PUB, BABE MORE THAN A FLOUNDER LOVES HIS FIN, MORE THAN A GUZZLER LOVES HIS GIN. sID MORE, MORE, MORE, MORE. ‘THERE ONCE WAS A MAN, WHO LOVED A WOMAN. SHE WAS THE ONE HE SLEW THE DRAGON FOR! THEY SAY THAT NOBODY EVER LOVED AS MUCH AS HE-EE, BUT ME-EE, 1 LOVE YOU MORE. BUT ME-EE, I LOVE YOU MORE. (HE lifts her and carries her off DR) BABE MORE, MORE, MORE. THERE ONCE WAS A WOMAN, WHO LOVED A MAN. HE WAS THE ONE THAT SHE TOOK POISON FOR! THEY SAY THAT NOBODY EVER LOVED AS MUCH AS SHE. BUT ME-EE, I LOVE YOU MORE. BUT ME-EI | LOVE YOU MORE.THE Pajama Game ees coes (HINES ri and crosses DR, looking after them. Then cr HINES They'll never last. ese ame 'C rea (HINES) And now we'll take you to one of the town’s most exclusive clubs where a party is being given jointly by Mr. Hasler and the union. We were told to dress for the occasion. (HE dances off R) (CURTAIN OPENS ON HIDEAWAY SET) Scene 10 (HERNANDO'S HIDEAWAY As curtain opens, KIDS are dancing jazzed version of “Hernando’s Hideaway,” MAX crosses to C from L at end of dance) MAX Attention! Step back more ... Quiet! Quiet! HASLER : (Crossing to C from R) Now, Max, MAX Yes, M.H. HASLER I just want to say one word MAX Okay, M. H. (Crosses L, CROWD sits) HASLER (To audience) Follow Sleep Titers, this demonstration of harmony in our factory hits something deep inside of me and I know this party of yours is going to be a great success because it stems from a genuine Sleep Tite spirit of solidarity. (Crosses $R, GIRL kisses HASLER)Paes Tue Pajama GAME CROWD Hurray! (MAX crosses to C) MAX Well, we sure all say “Okay” to that, MH (Crosses L) So on with our little tribute to Sleep Tite Pajamas. And — now on with the Sleep Tite Fashion parade. Wear Sleep Tite at all social functions. (MUSIC has come in softly — Panel Curtain opens revealing MABEL clad in pajamas. SHE poses then dances — 4 slow steps, 4 fast steps, in circle DC. SHE says on cue:) MABEL DRESSES ARE FINE, BUT SLEEP TITE'S DIVINE! (Crosses to UR, sees HASLER and acls embarrassed, joins group R) MAX (Crossing to LO) Sleep Tite has everything ... grace, style and comfort. BRENDA (Appearing in opening, crosses to L) I'M GRACE PREZ (Appearing in opening, crosses to R) TM STYLE. MAE (Appearing in opening, crosses to L) I'M COMFORT. MAX (Crosses R) Wear Sleep Tite for happy family life. (Curtain opens revealing GLADYS and HINES in opening. THEY dance down C and \ on cue HINES says:) HINES NOW I TRUST HER NIGHT AND DAY, THAT'S TRUE LOVE THE SLEEP TITE WAY.THE Pajama Game - 141 ~ (TWO BOYS enter DR, cross to RC. GLADYS tries to go to them but HINES pulls her back with chain) MAX (Crosses to L) And another point, Sleep Tite is economical. (Curtain open revealing SID in pajama bottoms and BABE in pajama tops. THEY cross DC) sID LOTS OF FUN. BABE TWO CAN SLEEP AS CHEAP AS ONE (Crosses USC) MARRIED LIFE SID, BABE, & ALL PRINCIPALS THE PAJAMA GAME IS THE GAME WE'RE IN, AND WE'RE PROUD TO BE IN THE PAJAMA GAME, WE LOVE IT, WE CAN HARDLY WAIT TO WAKE, AND GET TO WORK AT EIGHT. NOTHING'S QUITE THE SAME AS THE PAJAMA GAME, CURTAIN On second curtain, during bows ALL sing: Eee ee Ce SEVEN AND A HALF CENTS DOESN'T BUY A HELLUVA LOT SEVEN AND A HALF CENTS DOESN'T MEAN A THING. BUT GIVE IT TO ME EV’RY HOUR, FORTY HOURS EV’RY WEEK, AND THATS ENOUGH FOR ME TO BE LIVIN’ LIKE A KING. END OF ACT 2