English First Language

More narrative writing

What the story about?
A police officer going to investigate a crime warehouse with their partner
Who’s the narrator?
First person
How’ll the story begin?
The officer walks to the warehouse with their partner during night
How will it end?
Backup is called and the warehouse is shut down with everyone arrested, but they find out it was
one a series of warehouses, and they have a huge trafficking network.
Writing 400ish words:
I’m walking down a long, dark en creepy street, not even rats want to live here. It doesn’t surprise
me a drug trafficking warehouse is operating here. While walking here I could only hear the mystic
sounds of the night, but as we get closer a subtle noise becomes louder, until the suspected
warehouse is in sight. I see people openly shipping meats and other everyday groceries.
I tell my partner to slow down. She looks scared but and wants out. I quickly calm her and say
backup will be here with the click of a single button. ‘We should go closer and try to take a few of
them out and take their clothes to blend in. My contact is never wrong, when it comes to scouting
out creepy stuff’, I tell my partner.
We swiftly grab two people to the side and knock them out. Luckily their clothes fit. We carry their
wagon to a suspicious van, that sounds like an ice cream freezer but without the nice smell of ice
cream. The guy waiting for our arrival was mad. He was shouting a lot threatening to beat us. I give
my partner the look and we apologise profusely while giving puppy eyes. The guy gives us a weird
look but writes it off. We of course use the excuse that we’re new.
Making our way into the warehouse to investigate was no too hard. It was as easy as taking the
smelly wagon into the warehouse signalling you’re going to get more goods for the vans and lorries.
My partner gently gives me an elbow to my stomach nodding towards a storage room. There were a
lot of white square packages stacked neatly everywhere. The room was like a fridge, you could only
smell cold. As soon as we walked in there the door closed with a loud thud. Another door down this
fridge opened people were coming. A person giving off a nasty aura was coming toward us.
He sees us and knows we’re not supposed to be here and flies over and tackles us away from the
hall and behind a mountain of bags. I fight back with a solid punch to the stomach, and his
sunglasses comes off. He says ‘what are you doing? You hit the backup button and got here as fast
as possible.’ He then starts explaining how this is just one of a large network of underground
trafficking of all sorts of illegal stuff. He had infiltrated them for a couple weeks now. He gives me
a plan to take this warehouse out without him getting his cover blown.
There’s a huge stack of explosives and arms in the centre of the base. He gives me this shiny id and
tells me to go over there and say I found an intruder and is taking something to get rid of him as fast
as possible and then light everything and get out.