“Her façade: Not your work for evaluation”

“Kitni saanwli hai” (She’s so dark)

“Kesay daaney hein” (God! Your pimples)
“Moti Moti” (fat fat)
“Sookhi, khati nahi ho?” ( You’re so thin, don’t you ever eat?)
These words slip- out of the tongues of judgmental “aunties” and who not?

In the society I breathe in today, if a fat girl is not told she’s fat people suffocate onto their own held back words.

Chants like these, exist as a mayhem of unnecessary and un-processed words- quite sadly, the
only music that’s “Hilal enough” for our ears. Time after time, history repeats itself; after nine
months a piece of an art child first cries eerily in this shallow air (ironically enough the child
cries) the Picasso and Leonardo a.k.a the “parents” hold the child close into their gentle
embrace and promise their soul for protecting the child from all the ill-fated happenings to
come. Soon as the painting: child is shown to the world it is as if a painting is exhibited open for
criticisms. What follows is- “Yar bohat barra sar hai iska banayein ge shape de kar”; “pyaray
features nahi iskay”; “Bilkul phupi par gaya/gayi hai” etc etc. And soon as we grow up these
judgements experience a metamorphosis and become harsher, taking away the “V-card” of our
confidence that our mother tried so hard engraving into our personalities whilst she left us on
our own for a fraction of time with her hearts clenched to doubts and confusion.
According to a public survey: “67% of the females today feel comfortable “IN THEIR SKIN”
only when they have makeup on”. And unfortunately, I myself lack the confidence of facing an
outsider without a blob of BB crème to conceal my “MISTAKES” aka acne scars, because well
fortuitously enough it’s better to escape the desi remedy talks with my friends and family,
which I've quite frankly-memorized by heart till date. It throbs my heart when a girl too tall for
the society has a bad posture due to constant judging or a girl too short constantly wears
platforms and heels and well, spends most of her night rubbing them to ease the soreness. “Yar
tumhari Khali se shaadi kardein ge” is a very common joke to crack amongst my friends to
acknowledge a tall height.
The question that embosses upon the- oh, how they say “Us larki ki tarha choti” mentality of
our facially censorious society is why can’t we be the we are? *drum rolls*… Because we let
others decide how we want to look, we ourselves give permission to others to “edit” our
existence as a whole. I married the words of someone I read online “Don’t let people feel
comfortable with criticizing you” and since then, I don’t at the very least think of the fights I
could've fought “back then” in the argument. Aunty said we’re too tan? Tell her in your pov it’s
a gorgeous bronze tint eh; It shouldn’t be you buying Fair and Lovely off the “beauty” shelves of
D.Watson and literally mercury poisoning yourself to death. Flaunt these scars, be proud of
your forehead the size of Texas, legs as thin as chopsticks. The real Pablo Picasso behind our
abstracted facades made us this way for a reason.
Next time you look at yourself in the mirror- kiss yourself for once, rather than cringing at your
appearance be happy for the two eyes the Omnipotent gave you from which you can see this
notorious face of yours. To all the girls fighting for their at brink low self-esteem, for their “once
upon a time” confidence please accept yourself the way you are; If change is intended it should
merely be only for your own happiness' sake and not for some “Hamza’s sake (just saying).
““The most terrifying thing is to accept oneself completely.”
― C.G. Jung
Go sip some dew and do this terrifying thing, because believe you me, it’ll make you happy to
your heart’s content.