My Life’s Philosophies

My life used to be bland and kind of just grey. Everyday kind of just blurred together,

there was nothing to look forward to or to be excited about. I had no plan for my future, besides

the one that was told to me, but then one night, I couldn’t go to sleep so I just stayed up thinking

about life. I realized that life isn’t really about having the road paved for you, but having zero

roads paved at all. It’s about discovering and exploring everything that interests you. Life is a

gift, and living it in a way that doesn’t make you happy is not living. So one of the things I want

to do in life is to make others realize this and also to just see the world, and I mean truly see it.

Life is too short to waste on things that don’t interest you and I wish people would figure that out

sooner.

My sort of call to adventure you could say was when I finally figured out that YOU are

the main character of your OWN story. Nothing is pre-written, it is all up to you for what you

want your story to be. In the end, your story should leave you feeling the best about what

happened in it. I realized this earlier than most people I feel like. I wish this type of thing was

taught in schools and not just something you have to figure out on your own. But in order to

really just embrace this, I had to let go of some of my responsibilities. I used to feel as if I had a

responsibility to make others happy, to make my mom happy. I realized that that isn’t what life is

about. It should be about making yourself happy, being selfish sometimes is required in life.

Knowing when to be selfless is the hard part. Now, I am not saying to be completely selfish and

only think of yourself, but to know when to put yourself first instead of others. To know when to

put your needs first. That is what is Important.

 I didn’t do this all alone though. I had help. My brother was probably the biggest one for

me. We both had our paths carved out for us by our mom when we were little. She had a career

path ready for us without really asking if it’s what we wanted to do. But, it wasn't her fault, she

was trying to give us the safest route, that's just what all mothers do. So, no, I do not blame her

for this, but what my brother and I told her is that life cannot be a risk-free path already carved

for us. To us, that just wasn’t living. She accepted this and let us carve out our own path. When I

stopped making the choice of making others happy and making choices that made me happy is

when I knew I couldn’t go back to how it was before. Getting out of my comfort zone was the

biggest challenge I had, It truly tested me because it’s human nature to not like change, and to

stay comfortable. I feel like friends and foes in this story isn’t really fair to say. My mom wanted

the best for us and that isn’t an enemy but it sure didn’t help what my brother and I were trying

to accomplish.

The big battle of this journey, if you will, was probably the conversation I had with my

mom about life and what I wanted to do. I wanted to have just a civil calm discussion and try to

argue as little as possible. When we finally had this discussion I would say it went pretty well,

she didn’t agree with everything I said about how life should be something that should make you

happy and shouldn’t be about materialistic things. But, in the end, she let me decide what I want

to do with my life. Which I would say is a huge step and I hope to engage in that discussion

helped her as much as it helped me. After the discussion, I felt a huge weight off my shoulders

knowing that I could do what I wanted without being criticized for it.

When I started to go through the motions of life again I felt more excited, every day truly

felt new and exciting. In the end, I feel like I lost a bit of a relationship with my mom, but I think

it was for the best. This experience truly did change my life and I hope others figure this out and
realize that talking problems out is the best way as long as both sides are open minded about it

and willing to really discuss the problem out. Life really is an untold story, the future isn’t

known by anyone and it is all up to you to make it something worth living in for YOU or the

people you care about.