My racialized identity originates as Mexican. As a whole, I am Mexican American.

My

identity is made up of American and Mexican values. I would like to believe mostly Mexican,

but the reality is I did not grow up in Mexico. In fact, I’ve only gone to my parent’s home state

once. It feels as if my identity is completely different than my Caucasian peers since my origins

are those of another culture. Nonetheless, that is not the case because I do not know what it is

like from personal experience to live like my ancestors did in Mexico. My racialized identity

resembles those of most Caucasian people because I was born in the United States and have

learned American values. Despite these similarities, having Mexican origins makes life very

different than those of Caucasian identities. My people, those who identify with the Mexican

American culture, are treated as less, especially in schooling experiences.

In school, being Mexican American, did not significantly alter my academic life. I felt

supported by my educators and participated in a program that introduces access to college for

first generation students. This program is called Educational Talent Search (ETS) at CSU, Chico.

This program, which is primarily made up of Latinos, demonstrates how much more we are

likely to be left behind in school. I imagine what applying to college would be like as a high

school student if it weren’t for this program. The sole existence of this program is proof that

minorities are not supported as much as their Caucasian counterparts, who possess a higher

likelihood that have parents who attended college.

Being part of ETS influenced me to think of the community I am part of and the

problems we may face due to our racial identity, particularly in the educational system. Most of

us are not exposed to the resources needed to apply to college because many of our parents were

deprived of an education when coming to the United States. It is hard to ignore a scenario where

a Mexican American student is attempting to apply to college and their only resource is to ask
their parents for help, who may not even be literate in English. ETS’s mission is to guide

students, whose reality is similar to this scenario, from middle school through high school

graduation to successfully fulfill the requirements to attend and graduate from college. It is their

priority to accept first-generation students for this reason. ETS also goes beyond and is a

resource once these students attend college.

Through the years, my experiences as a Mexican American were not always positive. In

middle and high school, most of my peers were Caucasian. I come from a small farming town

east of Chico. The town is primarily White. I grew up with a lot of White friends and often felt

ashamed for being different. I tried to like “White” things such as listening to the same music,

dressing in expensive jeans and boots, following the trends they set, and much more. It was not

until I attended Upward Bound for the summers, starting my junior year, at UC, Berkeley. This

program consisted primarily of minorities, with only a few White students. During my summers

here, I learned about my identity as a minority and the issues that came along with it. I felt as if I

belonged. I remember feeling so comfortable in my skin and felt proud to be Latina. I remember

I even felt lucky that I brought something different to “American” society. Experiences like these

caused a state of constant flux in my identity. I am also certain it will continue fluctuating as I

begin my career as an educator. I feel lucky to be a resource that my prospective students may

use if they may need it. Minorites that become educators are opening a gateway for students, like

I once was, to feel the sense of belonging sooner than I did, which will hopefully expand skills

and knowledge earlier than it did for me.

As a teacher, being influenced by my life as a Mexican American student, I will have the

tools and resources for students who are minorities to prevail in a system that may not fully

support them. That may be whether they are in a system where they are not seen as worthy or are
in a system where the struggles of minority students are not prioritized. The system I am

repeatedly mentioning is that in which is primarily made up of White educators or educators who

are not familiar with communities they serve. Christopher Emdin (2016) discusses this particular

issue in our education system. Most of the teachers in our schools are White folk, which does not

accurately represent the students and communities they serve. A misconception many of these

teachers have is they feel the need to help “under-served” communities. The communities may

be under-served, but not in the same manner. These communities have their own assets. They are

often not properly given the necessary resources to maximize them. Emdin (2016) suggests the

approach in which teachers come to educate the youth in urban and rural schools should be one

that attempts to build deeper connections with students. The dangers are not doing so continue to

keep students disengaged with a teacher who is not making an effort to become familiar with

their students, which Emdin compares to the goals of the Carlisle School in 1879. The goal of the

Carlisle School was to “save” Native American children by transforming them to conform to the

ways of the White folk. Educators at this school felt sorry for these children for behaving

different than the White culture. As aforementioned, similar ideologies occur today which shall

be diminished by educators who recognize the importance of accepting their students and the

culture that is within each one.

There are very often more disadvantages than there are advantages of being Mexican

American in school. In my experience, my people are likely seen as not as intelligent by teachers

who teach in my community. It is the White kids who go on to fancy colleges and obtain

incredibly high grade-point averages. My senior year in high school, my dream college was UC

Berkeley. I remember giving up on my hopes to get an acceptance letter after knowing the White

student with a 4.5 GPA did not get accepted. Thinking back to that time as a senior, owning my
identity and using my voice to let myself be heard by these colleges would have likely earned me

a spot as a student at UC Berkeley.

When thinking about my identity, I don’t think it is just being Mexican that is a

factor in my schooling experience. Being a woman, who is also Latina, brings a whole new

subset of influences. As a woman, society likely doesn’t think I am very intelligent on top of also

being brown. My gender makes me feel strong and independent, as well as intelligent, which are

all integrated in most mindsets of Latina women. My gender definitely impacts my identity as a

Mexican American, I feel proud to be both. Latina women are oppressed by sexism in our

culture. In my opinion, I believe that is what makes us mentally strong, as we are often

challenging these ideals in society. In more modern times, more Latinas are challenging societal

norms more than ever before. We are making strides in how we are valued in Latino culture.

This sense of strength I feel from being aligned with women like myself resulted from my racial

identity.
 References

Emdin, C., & EBSCOhost. (2016). For white folks who teach in the hood-- and the rest of

y'all too: Reality pedagogy and urban education (Simmons College/Beacon Press race,

education, and democracy series book). Boston, Massachusetts: Beacon Press.