John Makransky, Lama Surya Das, Philip Osgood - Awakening Through Love - Unveiling Your Deepest Goodness-Wisdom Publications (2007)

Makransky, John (Author). Awakening Through Love : Unveiling Your Deepest Goodness.
Boston, MA, USA: Wisdom Publications, 2007. p (1).

http://site.ebrary.com/lib/nyulibrary/Doc?id=10407924&ppg=1
More praise Jor
AWAKEN IN G THROUGH LOVE
" YOll ' re in good hands w ith John; he has discovered how
[0 love hi s way all th e way to enlightemnem ."
- Lama Surya Das, auth or of
Awakcllillg thc Buddha With ill
" Written fi·om the hea rt, A wakcl/ing Th rollgfl Lwc is bound
[0 affect the hearts of all w ho read it. .. Practical, profound,
Jnd deeply movin g."
- Jose Ignacio Cabez6n , X IVth Dalai Lama Professo r of
T ibetJn Buddhism, UC Sama Barbara
" AllIakcllitlg ~nlro llgh L lVC presents a message of co mpas-

sio nate w isdom that is grea tly needed in coday's world. In
this book Dr. John Makransky offers readers of all f.1 iths
and persuasions a profound guide to experience the deep
and limitless love that has inspired and awak ened Buddhist
practitioners thro ugho ut the ages. Being both a learn ed
scholar and an experi enced practitio ner, Dr. Makransky is
w ell positio ned to presem the deep meanin g of th e
Buddhist teachin g to a co ntemporalY audi ence. This book

is an impo rtam contribution to th e modern und erstandin g
of Buddhism that will serve as an inspiratio n and a fri end
for anyone w ho wishes to experience rhe great qualities of
love, co mpassion , and Wisdom that we all possess as o ur

innermost being. "
-Cho kyi Nyima R inpoche, co-autho r of
Boston, MA, USA: Wisdom Publications, 2007. p i.
Medicille alld Compassioll

"Joh n Makransky communicates a deep sense of Tibetan wisdom
in an emin ently accessible and engaging styk. The book itself per-
fomls an ac t of attention, awareness, meditation , and th erapy.
R eading becomes a transformative event. The writing is deft,
compassionate, and highly compelling."
- Ri chard Keamey, C harl es B. Seelig Professor of
Philosoph y at Boston Coll ege
"Awakell illg Throllgh LOlJe is that fafC combi nation offi ne Buddhist
scholarship and deep meditative understa nding. J ohn M akransky
has don e us all a great service."
- :Joseph Goldstein, au th or of
Glle Dharma and A Heart Full of Peace
Boston, MA, USA: Wisdom Publications, 2007. p ii.
Boston, MA, USA: Wisdom Publications, 2007. p iii.
W ISDOM PUBLICATIONS •
L O VE
John Makransky
Edited by Philip Osgood

Foreword by Lama Surya Das
BOSTON
THROUGH
Unveiling Your Deepest Goodness

AWAKENING
Wisdom Public:niollS
199 Elm Street
Somerville MA 02144 USA
www.wisdolllpubs.org
o 2007 John Makransky

All rights reserved.
No pari of this book may be reproduced ill allY form or by ~ny means, d ectroni c
or mechanica l, including photography, recording, or by any illform~tion storage
and retrieval system or technologies now known or late r developed, without
permissio n ill writing from the publisher.
Library of COII.i!rm CIIIII/ogillg-ill-PllbIiCiltioll Dlltll

Makransky,John J.
Awakening through love : unveiling your deepest goodness I John Makransky ;
fore\vo rd by Lama Surya Das ; edited by Philip O sgood.
p.cm.
Includes bibliographical refeTences and index,
ISDN 0-86171-537-3 (pbk.: alk. paper)
I. Spiritual lifc-lluddhism. 2. Love-Religious aspects-Iluddhism. 3.
Compassion- R eligious aspects-Uuddhism. 4. Uuddhism- DoctrinC'S . L D:ls,
Surya. lI . Osgood, Philip. II I. Titie.
DQ4302.M35 2007
294.3'5677-dc22
20070 14697
II 10 09 08 07
5 4 3 2
Cover design by Emily Mahon. Interior design by Tony Luick . Set in Ikmbo 11.5
ptl 16 pc Cove'!' photograph by Michael Turck I Gctty [ lll ag~·s .
Wisdom Publications' books are printed on acid- free paper and meet the gu idelin es
for perm~nen ce and durability of the Production Guidelines for Book Longevity of
the Council on Library R esources.
Printed in the U nited States of America

Boston, MA, USA: Wisdom Publications, 2007. p iv.
oft This book produced with enviromm:ntal mindfulness. We have elected to

\\':IS
\1 print this ritle 011 SO% pew recycled paper. As J result, We have Sowed [he fol -
lowing resources: 36 (rees, 25 million IlTUs of energy, 3, 134 Ibs. of greenhouse gases,
13,009 b"311ons of water, and 1.671 lbs. of solid waste. For more information, please
visit ou r website. www.wisdompubs.org
Con tents
Foreword by Lama Surya Das VII
Acknowl edgments Xl
Introducti on: Unleashing the Powe r of Love
I. R eceiving Love: Key to Life, Key [0 th e Spiritual Path 15

Meditatioll: Receivillg the Healillg, Tralliforlllillg
~-if~- ~
2. Lcuing Be: Rel axi ng into Natural Wisdom 33
tWeditatioll : Lettillg Be ill N awrot Awareness 51
3. Lcning It Out: Unleashing Love's Power 69
tWeditatioll: Extelldillg ti,e L we Hie Receive 80
4. Loving Beyon d Boundaries 9S
Meditatioll: Self- TrallsceI1dillg Love 98
5. Pure Perceptio n and Profound Equanimity 131
lWcdilatioll: Awoken/lIg PHre Perceptioll 13 7
6. Compassion as a Liberating Power [57

Medilflfioll: Realiz illg Wise COlllpassioll 165
Meditatioll: Takillg Diffiwlties illto Compass/oil 190
7. Living Life An ew and Embodying D eep Goodness 20 1
Epilogue 239
~~ m
Boston, MA, USA: Wisdom Publications, 2007. p v.
Index 253
Abollt the Author 263
Audio Recordings of Guided Meditations 265
Abollt Dzogchen Center 265
Foreword
O H N MAKRANSKY IS A MENSCH. You 're in good hands wi th
J Lama John. And I should know that, having obse rved him
closely over th e last dozen years. H e is m y DhannJ heir in the 11011-
sec tJ.rian lin eage of OUf D zogchen master N yoshul Khen R.inp oc he.
Every true teacher wishes to have students and prorcgt's with the
pmcntiai to surpass him or her. As my protege, J ohn is such a per-
so n, o ne who has di scove red how to love his way all rh e way to
enli ghtenment. Wheth er he achieved this more from (he three
decades he spen t lea rning from Tibetan lamas in Nepal, Indi a, and
Am erica, or fro m his long w ork as a professor and Buddhist sch olar-
practiti o ner, o r from hi s life as a family m an, it is hard to say.
Und oubtedl y his bea utiful £lll1ily-rwo so ns and wi fe, Barbara-
are impli cated in m aking him the beloved teacher, esteem ed col-
league, and good spiritual friend he is on two co ntin ents , in both th e
East and West.

In 1978, shortly after finishing servi ce in th e Peace Corps, John
m et his fi rst Tibetan Buddhist teachers, Gelug-lin eage lamas closely
affiliated with Hi s H oliness the Dalai Lama. H e spent fiftee n years
immersed in th e study and practi ce of Tibeta n Gelug teachin gs of

love, compassion, and transcendent w isdom under their guidance.
Th en Nyoshu l Kh en Rinpoch e, Kh enpo SOl1am T ob b'Yal, and I
Boston, MA, USA: Wisdom Publications, 2007. p vii.
introduced him to the Dzogchen teac hin gs of th e Nyi ngma lin eage,
and Nyosh ul Khen Rinpoche indi ca ted [Q me that Jo hn would play
a significa nt role in our teachmgs and tran smission. After furth er years
VIII ."¥- Awakel/i/lg Throllg" Love
of spiritual practice, we all saw the practices oflove and co mpassion

rea11y come alive in John through the Dzogchen view of innate
wisdom-practices th at take natural expression in th e meditations
transmitted here.
After N yoshul Khen R..inpoche's demise in 1999,John and I trav-
eled together on pilgrimage to Nepal and Bhutan . Upon meeting
John at the Kagyu-Nyingma monastery near Kathnundll , its learned
a.bbot, myoid friend Chokyi Nyima Rinpoch e, see med immedi-
ately to recognize John's sterling qualities as a sc holar-practitioner
and asked him to teach annually at his monastery within Kathmandu
University's new Center for Buddhist Studies. John is now senio r
f.1ClIlry advi so r to the Ce nter and has been instrum ental in it becom-
ing partnered with Boston College, where J ohn is a professor of
Buddhism and compa rative theology.
John has been teaching the love, compassion, and awa reness prac-
tices in thi s book for years at our Dzogchcn Ce nter retreats. We are
reminded throu gh these practices and his example that love is not
found oll tside of ourselves; love is found through loving. Drawing
from his immersion in the mind-training teachin gs of compassion
and the Dzogc hen teachings of innate wisdom- using plain, prac-
ti cal instru ction- he helps readers un cover the unity oflove and
wisdom in the very nature of th eir minds. T hen he shows us how
to actualize th ose qual ities in each asp ec t of our lives-in f.ll11i ly,
community, work, service, and social action.
AsJohn always emphasizes, the key ro Buddhadharma is practice;
this book is based upon his own li fe of praccice, his very pragmatic
path of awake ni ng through love. Here he offers us the words of his

own teachers and tells many stories past and prese nt of those awak-
Boston, MA, USA: Wisdom Publications, 2007. p viii.
ened through this path. He speaks about th e power of unconditional

love to transform ourselves and thus transform the world. As Buddha
said of his own teachin gs: Don't take my word for it, find out for
yourself, tcst it out. John has follo wed this wisdom .
FarelllQ((1 ::J IX
Many readers w ho are not Buddhist wiU find th ese no nsectarian

practices accessible and applicable to theif fundamen tal beli efs and
concerns. John urges all people of fait h to explore how their own
spirirual paths may be informed and empowered by the practices of
love, compassion, and self-transcending wisdom transmitted here.
As he tcac hes, and as th e peace master Shantideva says in his classic
Wa y (if II,e Bodftisflllva: selfi shness is th e rea l demon, egotism is the
true enemy, and joy co mes naturally from lo vin g and carin g for oth-
ers. W e need eac h oth er to become enlightened, as His Holiness
the Dalai Lama often says, because we need to develo p deep com-
passion in order to fulfill the journey of awakening. Here in th ese
practical, use ful teac hin gs by a co ntemporary lama, we find the
modern means to fulfill that promise.
Lama Surya Das

D zogchen Ce nter, Austin, T exas
O ctober 2006
Boston, MA, USA: Wisdom Publications, 2007. p ix.
Acknowledgments
AM GRATEFUL TO MY SPIRI TUAL TEA C HERS and mentors for

l
their profound guidance and continual blessing: Nyoshul
Khen R.inpoche, Lama Surya Das, C hok yi Nyinu Rinpochc , !-I.H.
Drukchen Rinpoche, H .H . th e Dalai LamJ, Kh cnpo Sonam Tob-
gyal Rinpoche, T 1I1kll Thondllp Rinpoche, Geshe Lhllndllb Sopa,
Lama Thubtc n Yeshe, Lama Zopa Itinpoche, Geshe NgawJng
Dhargyey, Geshe Thubrcn T serin g, Ges hc LobsJ ng Namgyal.
Charles Geno ud , Lama Yeshe G yanuso, Tsc nzhab Serkong Rin-
poche, Ges he So nam Rinchen , Cyume Kh ensur Rinpoc he, and
Father Michael Himes of Boston College.
I thank my fri end and editor, Philip O sgood, for helpin g me
deve lo p this manuscrip t from Dharma teachings I' ve prese nted at
Dzogc hcn Ce nter meditation retreats th e past few yea rs. It was
because of Philip's de ep knowledge of the crea ti ve writin g process
:lI1d tireless co mmitment to th e spirit of enlightenment th:J. t the book

co uld emerge in this form. To wo rk with him W:J.S to receive a
remarka ble tutorial on good writing from a brilliant writi ng coac h.
Obviously, any infelicity of expression that remains is my own.
I thank Illy Dharma partner Juli e Forsyth e for her unf.,iling gen-
erosity and wisdom throughout this project. and my spiritual friends
Brendan Kenn edy, Lama C hoying Palmo, Roger Walsh, and J ane
Boston, MA, USA: Wisdom Publications, 2007. p xi.
Burdick for their insightful inp ut in ini tial writin g. Thank you Ana
Hristi c for yo ur wise assistan ce in early drafts , and Bob Morrison,
Le:J. h Weiss, Jane Moss, Andna Whited, and Sheila Moir for your
X" ::i Aw{/kening Through Low
wonderful contrib utio ns. Tha nk you, Paul C rafts, for yo ur selfless
support. I am also grateful to my editor at Wisdom Publi ca tions,
Da vid Kittelstrom. for his perceptive input and as.~ i s [al1 ce.
I det/icate this book to /IIy !/life, Barbara, alld chilt/rell , j Ollat!wlI alld
111)'
David, alld to rhe cOlI/passiollate spirifllai (.0"1I/1l1111ry of J)zogcliCII Cemer.

YOIl helped evoke rhe practices alld creative processes beliil/{I 'his work. So I
qffer tltis book to ),011, alId throllgh ),011 to all others, lIlitlt love,
Boston, MA, USA: Wisdom Publications, 2007. p xii.
Introduction:
Unleashing the Power of Love
VERYTHI NG THAT I S MOST I M PORTANT to human bein gs is

E dependent upon love. Powerful and enduring love,
grounded in wi sdom , is th e panacea to cure th e ills of this worl d,
starting w ith O llf own . W e all have this curative power of goodness
within us; all we need are the means to unveil it. This book provides
those mea ns.
Strong, imparriall ove is indispensab le for everyth ing that man crs
most to us. We seek safety and well-being for o urselves, o ur [1I11i-
li es, o ur communities. But what is it that makes us feel tru ly safe
and well? What makes intimate relatio nsh ips and family life il1m a
no urishing, life-affirm in g enclave rath er th an a pl ace of unfulfill ed
ex pectations and recriminations? What makes children sense they
are b'Towing up in a wanll, w elco ming hom e and community, rath er
than a c<lll o lis place of in difference? What makes o ur world feel
blessed; a place w here we feel free co ex plore o ur li ves together,

crea tivel y and joyfull y? Enduring lo ve is required co make all such
things possible.
Every human ac t is an ex pressio n of a basic mo ti va tio n- a force
of intent and wi ll. In any mom ent that our mo tivati o n is narrowed
by brittle self-concern, we are incapable of being fully present or
avai lable fo r o th ers. In contrast, in those mom en ts w hen we are
Boston, MA, USA: Wisdom Publications, 2007. p 1.
mo ti va ted by a ge nui ne, impartial care for others-a stro ng love that
actually wishes those around us to be well and happ y-we are
vividly present and attenti ve; we become a genuin e help and pon
2 .' ¥ Aw{/kellillg Through Low
of safety. This may sound simple, bue it is not simplistic. It is an

inesca pable human truth. Those w ho learn to embody thi s truth
have a joyful and fulfilling life; those who do not find th emselves
cau ght in co ntinual struggle.
Tlus book is for those who want to realize th eir capacity oflove to
th e ful\ <.."St, to apply its vivlfyin g and protecti ve energy to every p:m
of th eir li ves and wo rld . The meditations here ca n help YOll to unveil
your deepest goodness-a capacity of enduring love and wisdom that
you may not have rea lized you already own, a power to benefit oth -
ers all arOlmd yo u. This capability is not given to just a few people at
the w him of fa te-a select few to be admired fro111 af.tr. Every oJ/e if
'his imler capacity. Its power can be revealed through specific
liS lUI S
practices available to anyone wi th a stron g interest; it is just a matter

of taking th em up with dilIgence. Thousands before us ha ve entered
into these practices and experienced their life-transfonning results.
So w hat is love? And how can a grea ter force of love, gro unded
in wisdom, help li S to achie ve everythin g tha t we most care about?
If we all have sllch a capacity oflove and wisdom , how ca n we bring
it ou t and m ake it real in our lives? In thi s introduc ti on, we wi ll
begi n to address these qu estions. The following chapters th en pro-
vide specifi c means to awa ken our potential of wise, enduring love
for the sa ke of all.
Buddhist Methods to Unleash Love's Power

Man y of th e world's religious and cultural traditi ons affirm the ce n-
tral impo f[ance of love and compassion. Yet l:1u ddhism see ms dis-
tinctive in providing exceptiona11y clear and specific methods to
bring out OUf human capacity for endurin g love, co mpassion, and
th e self- transce nd ing wisdom th at informs rh em . The esse nti als of

th ese methods ca n be learned by anyone, 110 matter their religious
affiliation.
[//trot/llctiol! .,,¥- 3
Unconditional love and co mpass io n, supported by sympathetic

joy and equanimi ty, are among the essential qualities that the
Buddha taught his fo ll owers to culti vate. Buddhist texts refer to
th ese four powerful states of mind as the bOlmdless artillfdes. uwe here
is the powerfu l and enduring wish for beings to be deeply well and
happy :lI1d to possess the inmost ca uses of such happin ess. Compas-
sioll is th e endurin g wish for beings to be free from sufferin g and its
inmost causes. S)'l11patheticjo)' isjoy in th e happiness of bein gs and
in th e means to th eir happiness. Eqllallil11ity is th e deep wisdom
beyo nd self-centeredness through which the three prior attitudes
become impartial, all- inclusive, and steadfast. Buddhist traditions
teach specific ways for people to cultivate th ese potent attitudes and
to apply their power for the benefit of many others.
In texts that focus on the teaching of bllddlw "ature, th e Buddha
declared th at all th e qualities of hi s enlightenment- includin g the
capacities for such enduring love, co mpassion, and wisdom-abide
within the very essence of beings' minds. Our fundamental nature is
that of the buddhas. But this ilmate goodness is thickly obsc ured by
habits of thou ght that reduce others to mere objects of self-ce ntered
need. Buddhist traditions teac h specific ways to cut through those
obscurin g pattern s to un veil our natural goodn ess and to rediscover
ourselves and all others as intrinsically holy.
In Tibetan Buddhi sm, one cultivates th e four boundless attitudes

to empow er th e emergence of what is called th e spirit of el1ligflren-
I// ('I/t, or bodhi[hifta in Sanskrit- the resolve to completel y reali ze
one's hidden goodn ess in order to meet the deepest needs of beings.
The spirit of e nlightenment is the power of love, compassio n, and

impartial wisdom stirring within the individual, impelling her to the
full est reali za ti on of her best potential for the sa ke of all .
When th is profo und resolve takes hold of a pe rso n's heart and
mind, it makes him or her into a bodhisattva, one whose life is
directed to spiritual awakening on behalf of th e wo rld . For th e
bodhisattva, w ise love and compassion become so endu ring a

motive power that her daily actions bring tremendou s good into
th e li ves of th ose around her. As the Dalai Lama frequently teaches,
the challenge of our time is to learn how to take " universal respon-
sibility." That is w hat the bodhisattva p<lth of enli ghtenment actu-
all y means-taki ng the responsibility to rediscover your life as your
link CO all oth ers, to awa ken th e tremendous goodn ess hidd en within
you, and to act from there.
Love Is rhe M orive Force for Genuine H elp

Love is th e power to commun e with someone's fun da melHal good-
ness while wishing that person deep well- being and happiness. Any
tim e we la ck that genu ine wish oflove, we lack th e moti vati on to
be a significa nt help to oth ers. Love is th e motive powe r of help.
We ache at th e violence, pain , and hun ger in our world, and inside
us is a will to help . But " help" o nly helps if it is an active expres-
sio n of love. O the rwise our attemp ts to help, limited by narrow
self-conce rn , become rigid and too easily discouraged .
We may wa nt to protect o ur dear ones, but who will protec t
th em from us at th ose times when we worry just about ourselves
and <lre not listenin g to them? The violence in the world that we
hear abou t in th e daily news and so decry- is it only caused by those

"oth ers"? H ave n't we all contributed to th e coarsening atmosphere
of intolerance and distmst w henever we've lacked a loving response
and indulged our most self-ce ntered tendencies? How can we mak e
the world safer if we ourselves are not a stable port of safety? Ca n we

be honest about this?
Stron g love that wi lls the well-being and happiness of persons is
esse nti al to accomplish everyth ing we most va lu e for o urselves and

others. Yct this simple truch is hardly discussed in modern cul cure,
virtuall y ullm emion ed in newspapers and magazines. T hi s is
because conte mpo rary, sec ular societies ha ve little knowledge of

how to unleas h an enduri ng power oflo ve. Not knowing how to
do it, modern societies assume it ca n' t be done. So they look to
experts for helping strategies while ignoring th e role of mo ti va tio n
behind an y attem pt to help- as if only techniqu es mattered , not a
gellilille will to help .
Parents kn ow it is love that nourishes their children. " Parenti ng
strategies" are means to enact that love effectively. Bue the sa me
principle applies everywhere else: helping strategies on ly help w hen
they effectively carry o ut a genuine wish of care, ofl ove- th e wish
for som eone's we ll- bein g and happin ess. Ot herw ise, so-call ed
" helpin g strategies" don't help. H ave you noticed?
After college, I entered the U.S. Peace Corps in the Philippines
and worked in a tu berculosis program serving nJral villages. Patients
in this program needed to take their medici ne each day for a yea r.
If they stopped , their tuberculosis often return ed in more virulent
form . Unfortunately, monsoon rains delu ged th e region fo r seve ral
mo nths each year, and th e floods made it difficult for village patients
to travel mi les to th e nea rest clinic. Success required th e health
workers to carry the medicin e to the villages during the ra iny sea-
son , at grea t perso nal hard<;hip.
Local gove rnm ent and international agencies invested many
reso urces into th e tuberculosis program , and many health workers

w ere remarkabl y dedicated. But overall, th e wi ll to ge t th e medicine
to village patie nts durin g flood season was not stro ng eno ugh to get
the medi cine o ut reliably. Lacking that, the hum an tendencies
toward narrow self-co ncern , apathy, and prejudice aga inst th e ru ral
poor rendered communities helpless to deal w ith the problem effec-
ti vely. Therej ust was not enough endu rin g love, care, and compas-
sio n to make th e program work.

This experie nce panly motivated my explo ratio n of Buddhist prac-
tice in Asia after my Peace Corps service. It appeared to me that real
6 .' ¥ Aw{/kellillg T hrough Low
solutions to individual and communal suffcring required more than

material reso urces and techniques. OUf methods for achieving social
well- bein g may be sophistica ted but in themselves arc quite li mited
in effectiveness- wars, gross social inequiti es, and self-serving politi-
cal battles continue to pervade our daily headlines. The problem is
that th e basic subst.'lnce of social well -being isn't strategy or technol-
ogy- it is love, the will in our hearts for othcrs aro und us to have
happin ess and contentment. If that is abst: nt, no pol icy, no politi cal
party, no aOllY, and no technology wiDprotect us. Withou t an endur-
ing motivation of genuine ca re for persons, the COllm l 0n good sim-
pl y will not hold togeth er, no matter ho w clever th e plan o r how
advan ced the tec hn ology. When a stron g motive force of genuin e
care is prescnt , and when that motive force is enacted through wise
plans and m ethods, great benefit does come. We see this in th e effec-
ti ve work of exe mplary providers of service and aid here and abroad.
Love Empowers Social Service

and Overcomes Burnout
At meditation workshops, I meet many people invo lved in social
servi ce-teac hers, th erapists, social work ers , doctors, nurses, and
acti vists. Many say th ey have lost their energy for se rvice and have
beco mc burnt out. Th ey ask w hat can be don e to help th cm go on.

Wh en any of us wa nts to help, we need to ask ourselves: What is th e
motive for ce, the will be hind the helping? H ow powerfu l is that
intenti on and how lon g lasting? Is it just the weak commitm ent of
a fra il ego? If o tlr motivation for servin g others is tied to a stron g

desire for specific o utcomes or for praise, o ur potential is limited.
Because we can never completel y control th e results of o ur efforts ,
we may become easily frustra ted and di sheartened.

On the o th er hand , in any moment tha t a person's moti ve is the
simple, strong care fo r all involved, at least for that mo ment there is
no burnout, no discourage ment- love in aeeion is sufficient. If one

plan doesn't w ork, another can be sought; no narrow expectations
limit the freedom of lo ve to try anew. Such a way of being is its
own rewa rd , for it expresses our inmost nature of fundam ental
goodness. Have you known such a person in your life, someone
who embodi ed in her service to others a genuin e regard and affec-
ti o n for each one, inspiring them to rea li ze their best potential,
w hate ver th e result of the moment? It is the clarity and power of
ge nuin e ca re, a stron g, stable love wish ing others we ll , that makes
enduring service poss ible.
Indeed, chose who learn to embody an indomit:tble love become
vi rtually unsroppable in th eir activity for others, because th e Ill otive
fo rce of th eir action is unaffected by shof{-tenn o utcomes-people
such as Martin Lmher Kin g, the Dalai Lama, Aun g San Suu Kyi of
Burma, Thich Nhat Hanh , Nelson Mandela, Gandhi , and Mother
Teresa. Some admire such figures from af.1r and think , " H ow spe-
cial they are; I could never be like that. " But according to th e
Buddha, the powe r of active love in such people is a natural capac-
iry that we all share.
Without Enduring Love, Relationships Don't Work

The crucial importance of enduring lov e is obvious for family life.

It brings a power of goodness and joy into our f.1mili cs, so children
feel truly at home with us, fearless to explore w ho and w hat they
are. It mak es our relationships with spo use, partner, and fri end pro-
fou ndly safe, based upon deep mutual appreciatio n, reve re nce. and
joy, instead of the brittle reactivity of mere self- protectiveness. It is
th e nurturin g power of genull1 e love that protects and empowers
all intimate relatio nships. But it is equally important for our lives at
work. It is love, the operative wish for eac h person to ha ve happi-
ness, that mak es o ur workpla ce into a zone of genuin e care and
protection for coworkers, clienes, and custom ers, rath er th an an

arena of unspoken jealousies and recriminations. Lo ve protects lIS
from our own wors t tendencies to reduce others to mere objects of

mom entary need o r wam, triggering hostility and co mpetition
whenever our expectations are not met.
We can talk about "f.,mliy values" as mu ch as we wish, but th e
quality of our presence to partner, children, neighbors. coll eagues,
students, and clients depends CIl(ireiy o n the strength of our funda-
mcntal care fo r th em. In si mple terms: how strong is th e qua li ty of
o ur love for those with w hom we share our lives, how enduring
our wish for their happi ness? Whatever th e strategies for a success-
fu l li fe promulgated in self-help books, and no matter how hard
someone may thump a holy book to declare a particular belief as
th e answer to all life's problems, non e of th ose approaches works if
th e basic motive of gen uin e love, of actua l care for persons, is not
prescnt.
No Real Solution to Violence Without

Impartial Love and Wisdom
Someone mi ght obj ect-isn ' t loving everyone un conditionally
woefu lly unrea listic; being blind to how thin gs wo rk in the rea l
world? According to th e Buddhist teachin gs we wi ll ex plore in this

book , no su ch "real world" stands on its own, out there, apart from
w hat we are all making of it. We make our world with each inten-
tion, each action, each thought we have of others, and each reaction
to o ur own th o ught of th em. Strong love and w isdom are w hat

reveal the reality of self and others, so we call generate the kind of
world that we really want.
In my own city ofBostOl1 th ere was a news srory in volvin g ajeal-

ous man who took revenge upon a fonne r girlfriend by murdering
her child ren . A fri end of 111111e teaches in a school for youths from
poor inner-city neighborhoods. Several ofilis students, deeply upse t

at th e news, told him that they personally knew th e murdered chil-
dren. Then, one by one, th ese students recounted th eir own stori es
of friends and rela tives who had been murdered, often by rival gangs
w ho attacked o thers with little or no provocation. The students told
him: " This is t he world. This is how it is."
W hen indi viduals and gro ups do not experi ence bein g loved-
w hen whole communities lose hope that anyone cares-fea r and
violence are often seized upon as see min g protectors in the for m of
ga ngs, mobs, and co mmunal hostility. The only apparem protec-
ti on is to be 011 the strongest, most violen t side. Indeed, when vio-
lent tend encies beco me so om nipresent that they co mp letely
suppress love and compassion, their projections of fear and hatred
appear simply to be the world-as these stud ents declared.
T he anitudes of prejudice, hatred, and violence are so radically
cut off" from th e realities of persons--so los t in projections of fea r
and malice-that they present the appeara nce of bcillg objectively
w hat persons are, w hat the world is. C urrent perpetrators of vio-
lence here and abroad often perceive th emselves as th e histori cal
victim s w ho fi nally get "justice" through violence. Meanwhile their
own victims fc'lOtasize so meday b ecoming th e perpetrators so as to
inflict th eir reve nge in th e na me of''justice.'' Hatred and prejudice
dri ve a never-e ndin g cycle of self-righteous reve nge in the name of

th e good.
Fundamentally co ntrary to that dynamic an: the all-inclusive atti-
tudes of impartial love, compassion, and wisdom, w hi ch are attuned
to the actllal reali ti es of persons beyond such projection s. T hese atti-

tudes sense and respond to persons accurately, as th ey really are, in
th e co nditions shared by us all: layers of hum an suffering and fear
[hat hide treme ndolls inner capacities for gene rosity and fundamen-
tal goodness. Unconditio nal love and wisdom embodied in a per-
son's life are th e mos t powerful forces fo r remakin g th e world we
10 .<:/ AUlllkcllillg Th rough Love
experie nce toge ther and for holding open the door for othe rs to
learn si milarly. )
The Aims and Audience of This Book

The purpose of this book is to provide fresh access to Buddhist prac-
ti ces of love, compassion, and wisdom for aI/yo/Ie w ho wishes to
explore th em. The freshn ess of this approach comes from th e main
t1.l.dition I speak from- the Dzogchen tradition of Tibetan Buddhism.
Dzogc/im is Tibetan for "natural great perfection," meaning th at our
fi.ll1damelltal bein g is already pure, perfect, and tranquil ) primordiall y
good, the very nature of the buddhas. Our intrinsic puri ty, however,
is obscured b y narrow self-clinging thought patterns that have become
so habitual thar we misrake these th oughts for our very bein g.
The path to embodyin g un conditional love and wisdom is not
some overw helmin gly difficult stru ggl e to make o urselves into
so methin g ali en ro our nature. Quite th e o pposite. Unconditional
love and wisdom dawn as we come home to what we most deeply
are. O ur deepesr wish is already impartial love; our deepest kn ow-
ing already intuitive wisdom beyond self-clingin g. W e just need to
lea rn to relax ou r grip on ourselves enou gh to allow those ca paci-
ties to awaken wirh in us and shin e forth.
Efficient means of awakenin g have bee n passed down by great

masters of Buddhist tradition , adapted to th e hearts and minds of
the peo ple in di verse cultures throu ghout history. Such means are
provided in the guided meditations of this book. My intention is to
present th em in a form that is readily accessible to our contempo-

rary culture.
Th is book is aimed at two audi ences: (I) people, no matter th eir
religiou s affiliation, w ho seek fresh access to the hea rt of spirituality

and clea r, co ncrete ways to realize the power of love and co mpas-
sion; (2) people long practi ced in Buddhist tradi tions, w ho seek to
Illtrodllrtioll ~ I I
reco nnect with th e simplicity of practi ce in a fresh way, to revital-

ize and deepen their co ntinuing life in the Dharma .
While these techniqu es are transmitted from the Buddhist tradi-
tion, reade rs o f other £,iths are invited to take up the meditation
practices and e ngage them through th eir own spiri[Ual understand-
ings. Feel free to explore how your 6ith nuy be infon11cd and deep-
ened by practices of love, compassion, and self- transcending wisdom
transmitted here from Buddhism. For example, in th e meditation of
chapter I on receivin g the wish oflove, while I envision th e Buddha
at th e center of a field of beings who radiate their wish of love, a
C hri stian mi ght envi sion C hrist, a Hindu might envision Kri shna,
a J ew or Muslim simpl y th e radiant power of God's love.
Replicating the Transformative Effect

of an Anci ent Tradition
The co nte nt o f this book is not merel y of my own makin g. It is
th oro ughl y dependent upon my teac hers w ho transmitted these
practices and 011 those sfildents w ho have co mc to me over the years
to leam them.
Most of m y teachers have been Tibetan s, and th e guided medi-
tations in thi s book translate my experi ence of Tibe tan Buddhist
practi ces. But this translation does not seek just to reproduce the lit-
eral context of their anc ient tradition. Rath er, it seeks to replicate
the effect of their words on me over several decades of practice.
Thcse practices have woven themselves into a heart and mind pat-
terned by my life as an Amencan, f0fl11 ed by th e symbols, myths,

and perspectives of my culture. These teac hers instigated in me a
learn ing process that revealed some of my di stin cti ve ly Western
chann els of receptivity co Buddhist tru ths. And anythin g th at my

own stude ncs ha ve found helpful in my tcaching has furth er
infoml ed and sharpened this leaming process.
12 .<:/ A u/IIkellillg Th rough Love
For exa m ple. th e traditional door of enrry into the pa th of th e

buddhas is to take rtJ//ge in the liberati ng qualities and po wers of
enli ghtellmem . This means to rely compl etely upon th e powers of
unconditi onal love, compassion, and wisdom that are full y reali zed
in th e buddhas, evo ked by the practices they transmitted (Dharma),
and embodied in mature spintllal communi ty (san gha). In T ibetan
practi ce, such refuge is furt her empowered throu gh th e profound
practi ce of Ill/ jOII , merging one's mind with the enli ghtened mind of
one's spiritual teachers, beyond separation of self and other.
Tibetans engage such profound prac tices of lInion first by ritually
receiving th e blessin gs of the buddhas from stylized Indo-Tibetan
arrays of ho ly beings. These " blessings" are actually th e liberating
powers ofl ove, compassion, and wisdom-capacities anyo ne ca n
lea rn to open to. But th e symboli c depictions that Tibeta ns use for
openin g to such powers may not fun ctio n to the sa me depth fo r
Westerners. at least not initially. O ver time, th e prac ti ces ta ught by
my Tibeta n teachers helped me to recall and receive the love and
compassion that I had sensed in caring people and mentors through-
out my entire life as a W esterner. I began to realize that th e " bless-
ings" of enlightenment had pervaded my world all along, embodi ed
in countless wise and lovi ng gestures. This made such blessings real
to me, strengthening Illy capacity to receive th em deeply from my
Buddhist lineage teac hers as well, thu s repli cati ng a key effect
achi eved by Tibetans throu gh th eir symboli c fo rms.
In the cbapters that follow, we will explore how the prac ti ce of
receiving th e radiant wish oflove from loving people and spiritual
mentors, and merging into oneness with th em in th at radia nce, pro-

vides a way for co ntemporary people of all backgrounds to access
th ese powerful Tibetan practices of refuge and uni on. In this way,
by usin g chan nels of receptivity natu ral to us, we lea m to let o ur

inmost goodn ess co mmune with the inmost goodn ess of all w ho
have loved tis. Then, throu gh th e power of sti ch communion, we
Illtrodllrtioll ~ 13
are brought to rest in th e limitless, radiant ground of such goodness:

the deep wisdo m of pure awareness beyond self- grasping. Through
such practi ce, we begin to sense each aspect oflife and every being
as holy.
In 1978, sho rtly after I had finished my service in th e Peace Corps,
I met my first Tibetan Buddhist teac hers, LIma Thubten Yeshe and
Lama Zopa R.i npoche, w ho connectcd mc with othcr tcachers c10sc
to His Holiness th e Dalai Lama, including Geshe Ngawang D har-
gyey and Geshe Lhundub Sopa. I spent fifteen years immersed in th e
study and practice of Tibetan teachings of love, co mpass ion, and
wisdom under their guidan ce, inspired especi:lil y by th e ancient
Kadam and Gelug maste rs of Tibet. T hen I Inet Lama Surya Das,
Nyoshul Khen Rinpoche, and Khenpo Sonam Tobgyal , w ho intro-
du ced m e to th e teachin gs of Dzogch en from th eir reve red
Nyingma lineage. After further years of practice und er their guid-
ance and inspiration, the teachin gs of love and co mpassion came
newly ali ve for me in li ght of the Dzogchcn view of innate wisdom ,
taking expression in the meditations tran smitted in this book. In
rece nt years, my understanding of the unity of compassion and pri-
mordi al awareness has been further informed by til e profound tea ch-
in g and bless in g of C hokyi Nyima Rinpoch e and His Holiness
Drukchcll R..inpoche.
Wh en Lama Surya Das asked me to help gu ide practi ces at med-

itation retreats, I found that, like him , th e most effective way was
not only to qu ote my teachers' words, which 1 cherish, but also to
speak from the effec t of their words on my practice and life-my
own expe ri ence of th eir teachings, however limi ted. The sa me

approa ch has shaped the co ntent of this book. My hope is that this
process of translati on may assist you to tap into your ow n innate
reserves oflo ve and wisdom.

1. Receiving Love:
Key to Life, Key to the Spiritual Path
Love Pervades Our Existence
M y roo t spiritual tcacher, N yoshul Kh enpo, has said that a mo ment

of enlig htenm e nt is a mom ent when we reali ze " th e blessin gs ch at
are always po uring forth. " We are, by nature, endowed with qual-
itics of absolu te good ness-purest love, compassion, w isdo m , and
tranquillity. Those radia nc qualiti es are intrinsic to o ur being. Th ey
are some of the "blessi ngs" to whi ch Khenpo rcfcrs .2 A mom ent o f
enligh ten ment is the mo m ent that we newly notice such " blessin gs"
as havin g bee n all arou nd liS, and w ithin us, from th e beginning.
Wh enever we JfC ready to noti ce, we ca n sense th eif healing, lib-
era ting energy pourin g forth right here, right now.
One slI ch radiant quality is un conditional love; th e kind of love
that do esn 't care w hat someone has th ought o r don e but simply
wishes him decp weli-being and joy. It's like the un co nditio nal and
unreserved love that a wi se, devoted parent has for her child. That
capacity of lo ve is within each of us and has been acti ve aU aro und
us, pervading our world from the moment we we re born.
The clai m th at love pervades this worl d may not sO llnd rea l to
you but not beca use it isn' t true. Rath er, many of us haven't learned
to pay much attenti on to countless moments ofl ove, kindn ess, and
ca re th at surround us eac h day: a child at the store reac hin g for her
moth er's hand , an elderly stranger at th e park who smiles upo n a
16 .<:/ A u/IIkellillg Th rough Love
yo ung f.1 Illily. ;l grocery clerk or wa itress who beams at you w ith
ki ndness as she hands you the change.
The " blessings th at are always pouring forth " include th e per-
vas ive powe r of love that ha s permea ted our li ves, pec ki ng at us
through the eyes of many persons all along. Think, for exa mpl e,
of so meo ne w hom you adored to be ncar wh en yo u we re a child .
A parent or gra ndparen t. a special aunt or uncle, a f.1mily fri end or
teacher-someone it felt wo nderful to be with . Why did yo u like
so mll ch to be near th at person? Probably beca use th ey radiated a
wish ofl ovc [a yo u, the simple wish for yo ur well- being and hap-
pin ess, throu gh th e qu ality of their prese nce, th eir words, th eir
play wit h yo u, or simply through th eir smilin g eyes w he n yo u
ca me nea r. Try to rem ember someone like that from yo ur child-
hood ri ght now. Hold th at person in yo ur mind for a moment.
R ecall how it fe lt to be near him or her. That's w hat it is li ke to
receive th e love that just wishes for yo ur happiness. W e like to be
near people like that because we have a deep need to receive thei r
un spoken love, th eir wis h for our happin ess, to drink up its life-
givin g goodn ess.
Rediscovering the Love in Your World

That radiant blessin g oflove has been coming to us from th e start, not
jllSt fr0111 a few people close to us, but also from man y not perso n-
ally known to LI S or forgotten. So many have offe red themselves to
us qui etly, unnoticed, and unremark ed upon , sll ch as th ose w ho
served in Ollr sc hool parent- teacher groups, w ho coached SpOTtS for

us as small children, who taught us music and clap ped w hen we
pla yed, who watched over us wi th kindn ess and care w herever we
ran and played. Countless such adults offe red th emselves each day
from a simple. lo vi ng concern for the children of those towns,
including you and mc. Then th cre arc all the adults w ho pm lovin g
ca re into their work fo r us, as o ur teachers, doctors, nurses, social
workers, craftsmen, bakers, librarians, waitresses. Ye t we may never
have noticed the extent of such care and consideration . No one actu-
ally verba li zes: "Our of lovi ng concern for all the children in this
neighb orhood, in cluding YOll ,1 am helping to build this play-
groun d," or " 1 am now send1l1g you th e wish ofl ove; that's w hy yo u
like to be near me." And th e child doesn't thi nk, " I am now receiv-
ing th e w ish o fl ove." We overl ook it o r just take it fo r granted. So
we may never become conscious of how mu ch lovin g care is in o ur
world and how pervasive it has been all alon g.
Then 3S we grow older, we learn to pay attentio n to thin gs that
society conside rs more rea l and signifi cant th an the lovi ng care o f aU
those people. According to the social disco urse aro und LIS, it see ms
much mo re im po rtant to identify those who m we should hate, fea r,
or compete w ith for affi rnlation, power, and wealth . Meanwhile.
televisio n news and magazin es focus our communal attention each
day on the horrible thi ngs that some people have done to others, as
if that is all that happened througho ut the entire world that day.
Mu ch of o ur discourse is spent propping up this negative worJd-
view: "Oh, yes, I know w hat you mea n, my rdatives are horrible
too." " I can' t swnd cha t poli tical leader either. " "Can yo u believe
how stupid th ose people are?" As adults our attenti o n ha s become
so foc used o n th e unlo vin g aspects of o ur li fe and wo rld , we e3sily

ove rl oo k the love embodi ed in countless small dail y gestures of
kindness. We've lea rned to ignore that and to shut it Ollt.
We have become so smug in our cultural cyni cisms th at we do n't
notice how th e full er rea lity of everyone we talk abou t has ro uti nely
escaped o ur notice. Even the peo ple we generally look down upon
have had at least moments of integrity and kindness. Even in homes
th at we took to be unloving, th ere were some f.1ltering ges tures or

ki nd ness and suppo rt or social service wo rkers Jnd schoolteachers
stnl ggling to m ake the li ves of children and fa m ili es better.
18 .<:/ A u/IIkellillg Through Love
Th e truth is that very few of us wo uld ha ve survived o ur child-

hood had it not been for countless, now mostly forgotte n, acts of
loving kindn ess extended to us.
In additi o n, there are people in the world and throughout history
who ha ve benefited many persons beyond dl eir personal life, people
whose way of bein g embodIes su ch powerful concern for others and
for th e world that th ey epitomize our grea test human poeenrial, such
as Shak yamuni Buddha and Jesus, St. Francis, Martin Luther King,
Ga ndhi , Moeh er Teresa, and th e Dalai Lama. Such pote nt spiritual
beings h ave radiated their love to all of us without di scrimination.
But within modem, sec ular worldviews, many of us have forgoeten
how to ac knowledge and to receive the liberatin g power of such
love. Instead , we've learned to ignore it.
Our society provides no cu rri culum or sc hoolin g on how to
no ti ce so much love or to rec ognize the m any people w ho ha ve
transmitted its life-gi ving power. Most of us have n ' t bee n tau ght
that to receive love deeply and transmit it w holeh ea rtedl y is a real
human possibiliry, that it can be learned , and that to do so is the key
co o ur dee pest well - bein g, our spiritual life, and ou r capa ciry to
bring more goodness into this world.
So, as aduit'l, we need to become newly aware of the love that has
in fused o ur life all along, to turn our attention to it afresh with th e
eyes ofa child. To do so is to become conscious o f the tremendous

capa city oflov e th at eve n now permeates our being- to open to it,
heal in its life-giving energy, and participate in its power to renew
our world . We ca n awaken to the deepest goodness in o urselves and
others. We can learn to recog111ze and com111Ul1e with " the bl essings
that have always been pouring forth. "
The first step is to learn to pay new attention to wh at has been
igno red.
Reawaken to Love First by Noticing It
At the Comer Store

A poem by Aliso n Lutcrman
It was J new o ld man behind th e CQunter ,

skinn y, brown and eager.
H e gree ted me like a lo ng lost daughter,
:.'IS if we both cam e fro m the same worl d,
so meplace wa rm er and more gracious than this cold city.
I was thi rsty an d alo ne. Sick at hea rt , grief-soil ed

and his t:1ce lit lip as if I were his prodi gal daughter
returnin g,
coming hack co th e freezer bins in fro nt of the registe r
w hic h were still and always filled
w ith the sam e old Cable Car ice-c ream sandw iches and
cheap froze n greens.
Back to the kno bs of beef and packages of hotdogs,
th ese t:1 l1liliar shel ves strung w ith potato chips and corn chips,
stacked- up beer boxes and immorralJim Beam .
I lumbered to the case and bought my precious boctied wate r

and he return ed my change, beaming
as if I we re th e bright new buds on the just-bu rs tin g- o pen
cherry trees,
as if I we re everything bea utiful struggling to grow,
and he was blessing me as he handed me m y dime
over the dirty COLI mer and the plasti c [Ub of red Ij corice
w hips.
20 .<:/ AUlllkcllillg Through Love
This old man who didn't speak English

beamed out love to me in the iron week after my mother's
death
so that w hen I emerged from his score
my whol e cockeyed life-

what a bea utiful f.1ilure!-
glowed gold like a sunset after rain.
Frustrated city dogs were yelping in their ya rds,

mad with passion behind their chain - li nked fences,
and in the driveway of a peelin g-paint ho use
a woman and a girl dan ced to contagious reggae.
Praise AUah!Jah! The Buddha! Kwa n Yin,

Jesus, Mary and evcn jealous old J ehova h!
For eyes, hands

of th e divin e, everywhere. J
What is remarkabl e about this poem is not that th e old man

extended sll ch love. Many people are extendin g such love, th e sim-
ple wish for another's happiness- and have bee n since the day we
were born . What is remarkable CO me is that the poet, Alison Luter-
man, was w illing to lIotice it. Even durin g the " iron week" afte r her
Illocher's death, she noticed th e love that a little stran ge r radiated to
her fr0111 be hind a store counter. It was natural to think o r the clerk
as a foreigner, someone w ho didn't even speak th e same language.
But moved by hi s simpl e love, which asked nothin g in return , Ali-
so n foun d herself participating in a more subtl e level of co mmu ni-

cation with him, a silent lan gua ge of grace and blessing, " ... as if we
both came from ... so meplace warmer and more gracious th an this
cold city."
Even more remarkable th an her willingn ess to noti ce such love
was her wiUin gness to receive it. The simple act of accepting this
stra nger's wish for her happiness empowered her to experience the
worl d in a completely diffe rent way. To accept that wish of love
evoked a natural awe toward her own "cock-eyed" life, wh ich now
"glowed gold like a sunset after rain." T o accept that wish of love
brought out her ca pacity to appreciate and revere all that was arrayed
around her: the yelpi ng dogs, the paint- peeling house, the moth er
:lI1d daughter dan cin g, and the reggae music.
To receive such a si mp le wish o flove qui etly opens our minds to
an innate wisdom that recognizes the essential goodness of being, the
ilHrinsic goodness of expe ri ence itself, the joy of bein g alive. It
brin gs Oll t the natura l wisdom that was hidden in our minds-a
purer vision that knows the beings and thi ngs all around us to be
utterly holy, as if they were aU messengers of the Buddha, of God.
That is why Alison's poem ends with sllch appreciation, gratitude,
and reverence for "eyes, hands ohhe divin e, everywhere."
To receive love in th is way is to become co nscious of a fresh,
holy world that was somehow obscured by o ur tired, socially co n-
stru cted worl ds of self-ce ntered worry and cyni cism . Wh en some-
o ne awake ns in a moment of receptivity, as Aliso n d id, to the

"blessi ngs that are always pou ring forth, " th e fres h, sacred wo rl d
that was long ignored suddenly un veils itself It is sdf- revealed as
one's true home.
Discover the Benefactors in Your Life

We di scover love's transformative and liberaring power first by

receiving love more fully, then by offeri ng it more incl usively, and
finall y by beco min g a reflex of it from th e ground of our bein g.

That is one way to describe th e path to enlightenment. To enter
into this process, we need to identify benefactors w ho have been
emissa ries of love in our lives. "Benefactor" here means someone
who has se nt us the wish of love, the simple wish for us to be weIJ
and happy, like th e store clerk in th e poem. Once we start to notice
such bein gs, we find , actually, that th ere have bee n man y that have
radiated such love to us, but we had mostly ove rl ooked or forgot-
te n th em .
A bencL1ctor is so meon e YOll perceive as suc h in yo ur own expe-
ri ence; not just someone you assllme you should pick as benef.1ctor.
Yo ur benef.1c tors may be li ving or not. It makes no difference-th e
power oflove transcends how we think of time.
Exercise: Ll(Irlli/~ to Recognize Bmifactors

(t's important to be mindful that bcncf.1ctors need not be inf.1lli-
ble or perfec t people. Just allow yourself to beco me newly awa re
of momcnts when so m eone's unrese rved love ca mc to yo u-
through a kind word, a gcsrure, a smil e, or a comfo rtin g prese nce .
It co uld be someo ne well known to you or a seeming stranger like
th e store cl erk.
Try to recall someone like that from your childh ood right now.
Envision his or her smilin g presence before yo u. Recall how good

it felt to be near that person. That is what it is like to receive love.
Hold that person in mind for a little while, co nul1 uning with him
or her in th e simple goodness of their wish of love for you, th eir
wish for YO llr happiness and joy. Take a few minutes just to relax
and recei ve that wish from him or her. Hight now.
When yo u feel ready, try now to think of a fe w oth er persons you

adored to be near as a child. An uncle or aunt, perh aps? A sc hool-
teac her that yo u loved to be with? A fri end of your parents w hom
you looked forwa rd to seeing? When I began to do tlus exe rcise, my
seco nd grade teac her suddenl y appeared in my mind 's eye-Mrs.
Kirchn er, w ho m I liked so mu ch that I accidentaBy call ed her
" mom" at school. So that is why I liked to be near her, I reali zed.
She wasn' t just teac hin g; she was expressin g her love fo r her stu -
dents th rough her teachin g. Another tim e, two close fri ends of my
parents cam e suddenl y to mind- T ed and Yvonn e, with th eir smil-
in g [lces radiatin g kindn ess to me as a small chi ld. Then th ere was
my lIncle M orton , who expressed his love with silly jokes and by
snitchin g so me of m y french fries when I wasn't looking-w hil e
nukin g sure I wo uld catch him in th e act.
W hen you have thought of a few such benefactors in your life,
imagi ne th em before you one by one or all together. Mentally hold
th e smiling faces of those benefactors before you; th en relax and j us t
accept th e simple goodn ess of th eir wish fo r your well-being and
happiness, th eir wish oflo ve for you. T ake time for th is right now,
accepting, receiving, and enjoying the power of their wish. There
is nothin g more imporLl l1t to do.
If you do this exe rcise repeatedly over tim e, you will progressively
recogni ze more benefactors not only from your earl y life but from
oth er periods as we ll , ri ght up to the prese nt. Even now th ere are
perso ns YO ll have probably overlooked who make a wish for yo ur
happiness, but yo u hadn 't reali zed how important and life-givin g it
was to pay atte ntion to them .

As practice progresses, you may find yourself widening your range
of benef.lctors by spontaneously recalling instances when you were
th e reci pient o f unconditional love, even from peo ple th at you long
charac terized as unloving! One mediL1tor, who had a partic ularly
difficult relati onship wi th his mother over th e years, to ld me how he
found himself recallin g a scene fro m his ea rl y childhood duri ng a

medita tion session on love. H e had been in a fever, foggy with delir-
ium , w hen hi s mocher came to sooth e him by placing her hand on
his stomach-a gent1 e, healing tou ch . Even after all these years, the
me mory of that sim ple, loving gesture suddenly reawakened. Aga in,
we are not lookin g for inf.1 JJibl e persons; j ust moments when gen-
uin e, un reserved care cam e throu gh.
Feel free to include your pet as a benef:1ctor. Pets ofte n take such
j oy in our happiness that it's natural to include th em amo ng o ur
benefactors .
1m por tonce of Spiri tua! Benefacto rs

Besides benef.1Ctors recalled from your personal life, it is im po rtant
to learn to recogni ze a seco nd kind of benefactor w hen it makes
sense to yo u-deeply spiritual persons in yo ur worl d, past or pres-
en t, w ho function as spi ritual benefac tors for you. T hese are persons
that YOlI feel embody great goodness, a force of love and compas-
sion that extends to all with out partiality, inclu din g yourse lf. These
may be people in your li fe w hose fundamental good ness and way of
bein g profoundl y influenced you. If yo u have a mentor or teacher
who inspires your spi ri tual practice, he or she wo uld be in clud ed
here. Yo u co uld also include th e teachers of yo ur own spiritual

teacher. Persons most profoundl y holy to you, such as Shakyamuni
Buddha or J esus, would Ll11 into this ca tegory. Try to identify ones
YO Il fee l to be sLlch sacred bein gs, true to yo ur own maturing se nse
of that, withou t tryi ng merely to confonn to oth ers' assu mptions.

Yo u pro bably have not had personal acq uaintance with all yo ur
spi ri tual benefactors. Some may be people w ho inspi re yo u fro m
af.1[, w heth er still li vi ng or not- holy bein gs, prophets, and spi ritu al
activists suc h as the Dalai Lama, T eresa o f Avila, Martin Luther
Ki ng, Mother Teresa , Marti n Bu be r, R amakri shn a, St. Francis,
Rumi , Th ich Nlut Hanh, Dorothy Day, R amana Maharshi. Such
bein gs ma y trul y inspire or guide you as yo u read th eir writings,
hea r th eir scories, or gaze upon a picture of them and feel th eir
goodness co nti ng throu gh. Indeed, you can keep a picture of such
a person near yo u for that purpose. One meditacor I know keeps a
picture of Mr. l1..ogers, the f:1.therly tel evision personality and min-
ister w ho help ed genera tions of Am erican children feel at home in
this wo rld.
Beca use suc h spiritually weighty bein gs have co mmun ed so
deeply with the ve ry source of love and compassion, the ve ry
ground of goo dness, we share in that ground w hen we open CO th eir
wish of love, th ei r wish fo r the fullest well- being and happiness of
ourselves and all others. It blesses our life. This is pa rt of the reason
that images of the Buddha, th e Dalai Lama, and oth er revered spir-
itual teachers arc so important to Tibetan Buddhists-s uch fi gures
are sources of spiritual energy and inspiration for those who regu-
larly commun e with them in th eir love and compassion fo r all.
Try CO bring to mind one or 1110re spiritual benefactors now,
whether personally known to you or admired from a distan ce, and
imagi ne their sntiJing presence before you. Relax and ge ntly open
to receive their wish for your deep well-being and ha ppiness, th eir
wis h of love th at radiates to you and many ochers. Co mmun e with
them in that way for a little while, and enjoy.
Entering into th e Practice of Love

Now YOll are ready fo r the meditation below. It can be done in daily
practice for about twe nty minutes per session. Pause after eac h
demarcated subsecti on, to give yourself time to dwell on th e instru c-
tion at hand. Wh en first begi nning, if you find it helpful , reread the
instru ction of o ne subsection a few times before medi tating on it for
a little while. Then move on to th e next subsection and do simila rly.
26 .<:/ A Ulllkcllillg Through Love
Wh en yo u have repeated th e meditatio n a number of tim es, you

will need to look at the written instmctions mu ch less. If you would
like a C D fo r oral transmission of the meditations in this boo k, please
consult the ordering information at the end of the book.
M edirarion: R.eceiving rhe H ealing,

Transforming Power of Love
Part 1: ReceiviIIg Love
Sit in a relaxed way with back comfortably straight, on cush-

ion or c hair, eyes open, gazing sli ghtly downwa rd. Having
identifi ed both kinds of benefactors, ones from ordinary life
and spiritual benefactors from near or far, bring one or more
of eac h type to mind and imagine th eir smiling faces before
you. Envision th em sending you th e wish ofl ove, th e wish
for your deepes t well-being, ha ppiness, and joy.
Sensing these wonderful people before yo u, gently o pen
to th eir wish oflove. Imagine thei r wish as a gentl e radiance,
like a soft shower of healing rays. Bathe your whole body
and mind In that tender radi ance, all th e way down to your
toes and fin gertips. Bask in the loving energy of that wish.
Trust it. You don't have to trust every aspect of::111 benct:l c-
tors, just th e wish of love that they radi ate, th e simple wi sh
for yo ur well- bein g and happiness.
R eceive the gentle, heali ng energy of that radiance. As other

th oughts or feelings arise, let th em be enveloped in this lov-
ing luminosity. N o matter w ho you think you are, w hat you

th ink yo u deserve, all such though ts are irreleva nt now-
just accept the benefactors ' wish of love for your dee pest
happin ess. Trustin g this wish more than any limi tin g
th o ughts of you rself, recei ve it into your whole being.
Let yo urself rely upon this love, the goodness it comes
from , and the goodness it mee ts in your heart. To rely upon
elus love m ore than on yo ur own defe nsive reacti ons is to
find profo und refu ge.
Be at ease, open, and accepting, like a puppy lyi ng in th e

morning sun , passively soakin g up its rays. Absorb the soft,
healin g energy of love into every cell of your body! every
corner of your mind. Bathe in this, heal in (his, rest in this.
After a little whi le, join you r benefactors in th cir wish for
you. Whil e recei vin g the radiance of th eir lovc, mentally
repeat th e wish for yourself, using words like these: " May
this onc have deepest well-bein g, happiness, and joy." Affirm
the wo rds repeatedly in your nund. Try to mean them as
you say them, j ust as your benefacto rs mean them for you.
Like everyon e else in this world, you most deeply need and
desclv c happiness and weU- being. R epeat th e wish fo r your-
selfw hi lc accepting your benefactors' love even more deeply

in to body and mind, com munin g with them through its
radiance.
Pari 2: Lel/illg Go alld Mffgillg illio

Oueness with the Radiallce
Finally, let go into utter oneness with the radiance, dro p-

ping th e visuali za tion of benefacto rs, and rel easin g any
an empt to hold on [0 any frame of reference. Deeply let be
into tha t ge ntle, luminous w hole ness beyo nd separation of

self and others. E njoy just being thus fo r a little while, at ease,
at rest, complete.
Good work! Yo u have completed tht: meditation .
We H ave to Rece ive H elp if We Want to Offer H elp

Why Pay So MlIch AltmliolJ 10 Myself?
Most participants (meet at retreats and workshops catch on qui ckly
to th e pro fundit y of thi s practi ce of receivin g un conditi onal love .
Th ere is mu ch more to it than meets th e eye! Indeed . it eases us
experi entially into what it means actually to enter the spiritual pa th.
It does so by helping us to become newly co nscious of our hidden
capacities o f uncond itional love and wisdom (buddh a nature). and
to begin to rely on those capacities rather than on ego-centered
habits of m ind. T hat is th e beginning of auth entic refuge in the
intri nsic goodness of bein g. w hi ch presages entry into the path of
a bodh isattva, a holy one, the path to become a spi ritu al protec ror
of th is wo rld.
Some people have a sli ghtly defensive reacti on w hen fi rst intro-
du ced to co nscious receivin g oflove: " ( am not comfortable purring
so mu ch attention upon myself. I wa nt to turn my atte ntion to help-

ing others, not to myself. " Such a reac ti on is comm on here in the
W est, si nce many of us learn ed from childh ood that to be a good
perso n is to think fi rst of others. Dharm a teac hin gs fro m Buddhism
are also frequently misin terpreted to mean th at the well-be ing of

others is of a diffe rent order than the well-bei ng of oneself. But that
represents a t:1ilure to understand th e deeper implica ti ons of COI1-
ce rn for oth ers.

If we want to be truly helpful co others, ou r help must express an
auth entic care chat acnlally wishes others well. O th erwise, whe n th e
chi ps are down , o ur attempts at " helping" become brittle and self-
serving. If we want reall y to help others, we need a strong, endur-
ing attitude of lovin g care. But w here does such an attitude come
from ? Does it happen simply by tuming your attentio n away from
you rself to others? Aren't others a lot like yourselfin needing, wa nt-
in g, and deservin g such loving ca re? ff you don ' t think you o ught
to receive such love, do you really th ink that o thers o ught to receive
it? After all, th ey're just like you.
In order to give loving care in a stable, end urin g way, we have to
be able to receive loving care in a stable, enduring way. Wh y?
Beca use givin g and receivi ng are of o ne piece, and because "self "
and "oth er" are not so different fr0111 one ano th er. There is a say-
ing: " You can't give what yo u don't have." People w ho refuse to
receive love find that they have little to give.
The Ability to Receive Love Becomes the Ability to Cive Love

Indeed, one reason we have difficulty findin g th e enduring love we
need to help others is that others often bother us. Many others just
don ' t seem so good to us! On the streets, in th e tussle oflife, we are
o n o ur guard aga inst strangers to a greater o r lesst:r extent. But this
is related to our brittle sense of self What bothers us about o th ers,
w ha t w e di slike o r fear in th em , arc aspects of o urselves th at th ey
mirro r back at us, aspects we dislike seein g. Until we mak e deep

peace w ith sti ch aspects of ou rselves, un wanted aspec ts w e don ' t
wa nt to see, by learning to receive a love that to uches in past them
to th e in trinsic goodn ess of our being, we ca n't o pen to the intrin-
sic goodness of o th ers that also lies hidden fr0111 a lIT view.
We need to receive lo ve frol11 those who have sent it to us just as
we are, with all our flaws, in o rder to relax into th e deeper good-
ness w ithin LIS t hat always deserves sll ch love and ro heal th ere. Then
we ca n afTe r a love in turn that embraces others w ith similar fla ws,
that tou ches in on their intrinsic worth , mirrors th ei r goodness back
at them, and doesn' t give up on them no matter what. Perhaps you

ca n recaU someo ne w ho mirrored your own inner goodness back at
you w hen you felt most low. Wasn't that a profound help? That is
w hat we are lea ming to become-so meone w ho has received love
so fuU y that she ca n offer love to o thers unconditi onaUy. Therefore,
in th e practi ces that follow, our ability to receive love will evoke an
abili ty CO give love marc endurin gly and inclusively th an we may
have tho ug ht possible.
Many people, ove r many centuri es, have take n up a practice like
this and have already included us in it-spiritual benefacto rs who
fi rst learn ed to receive the enduring w ish of love fro111 o th ers before
them and th en radi ated th at wish to us all . Buddhas, bodhisa ttvas,
holy beings, spiritual teachers-many have blessed us with that radi-
ant wish even before we had heard of th em . From th em, we ca n
learn CO recognize th is, ack nowl edge it, receive it, pa rticipate in it,
and pass it o n. Then our benef.1ccors, by blessi ng us w ith th eir love
and compass ion, will continue to bless many others throu gh us.
Establi shing a Dai ly Practice

Try to do this practice of receiving and mergi ng w ith th e radiant
w ish of love each day for at least twenty minutes at a tim e. First thing
in th e mo rning is a fresh time for it. When first startin g thi s practice,
so me peo ple te ll me they ca n't recall any bene[,crors. That's no t
uncomm on , sin ce we may never have bee n told to identify them.
R emember, a benef.1ctor is not an infallible person- j ust so meo ne,
at some time, w ho w ished for you to be deeply ha ppy, we ll. joyful.

Man y near or f.1f have wished that, but we probably hadn't feam ed
ro notice. These days I pick man y kind adults from my early child-
hood, seve ral teachers and key mentors fro m school and summ er
camp, and many others throu gho ut my life, but it required some
excavating. In the beginning I didn ' t have th ese people in min d. I
didn 't eve n remember most of them. O vcr tim c th e practi ce it'iclf
began to unco ver man y w ho had quietly held me in their wish of
love. These are just examples; yo u will need to find the actual per-
SOIlS w ho embody that wish for you.
It is also important to make prominent wi thin your array of bene-

f.lctOrs th e spiritual fi gures that most powerfull y inspire you, such as
th e Buddha or a ce ntral spiritual being of yo ur own tradi tio n .
Within th e ce nter of the field of benefactors, yo u would place that
weighty spiritual figure, surrounded by yo ur own spiritual mentors
or teache rs, around whom are all your other benefactors. In my own
dJil y practice, the radiant figure of the Buddha is at the center, sur-
round ed by my spiritual teachers and th eir lineages, around w hom
are the other be nefactors I recall from this life. At the heart of each
is the radiant image of the Buddha, whi ch reminds me of th e source
of goodn ess in each of th em th at commun es with my own. Jf yo l!
are a C hristian, it wo uld be natu ral to envi sion C hrist at th e center;
if a H indu, the n Krishna, Shi va, or Mahadevi. If you are a J ew or a
Muslim, you might simply consider God to be the source of your
benc£, ctors' radiant love and co mpassio n.
D espite all that's been said, some people still find it difficu lt in th e
beginning to accept love for th emselves just as th ey arc. If that is
tru e for you, yo u might try envisioning yourself as yo u wcre w hcn
yo u were a ch.ild and receive th e radiant wish of love in that way.

See if th at helps you to get started in this profound prac ti ce.
I wo uld reco mm end that you practice the meditation ofth.is chap-
ter daily for some weeks befo re focusing much on th e medi tations of
the followin g chapters. The effect of such practi ce unfolds in its own
time. It ca n't be hurried. I envisage a typical reader reading throu gh
this whole book for coment but then rereading this chaptcr and doi ng
a daily practice of its meditation for several weeks. Then you ca n

reread the next chapter and do its meditati on daily for several weeks
or months, and so on. In this way, thc practice can unfold in irs own
J2 .<:/ A Ulllkcllillg Through Love
tim e, natul.\Uy and effectively. You can explore how it works best
for you.
Fami li ariz ing and Progressing

As you become t:lm iliar with th e meditation of receivin g love, sev-
eral things unfold. Fi rs t, more and more bcncf.'1Ctors occur to yo u-
so many people you had forgotten come crowdin g in up on you!
Au nts, un cles, cousins, grade school teachers, a co unselo r at camp ,
a special co ach, a smiling stranger who wave d YO ll ahead in line ,
persons who qui etly mentored and influenced you in positi ve ways
that YO li had never consciously acknowledged. Indeed, over ti me,
this simple practice ca n reintroduce you to your whole life! Many
people w ho we re esse ntial to you r th riving, long lost to yo ur con-
scio us mind, are rediscovered throu gh this practice. They become
a po tent influence in your life once again , as if yo u we re joyfull y
reunited with a host oflong-Iost fri ends and mentors.
Thro ugh daily practice, the meditation of receiving love softens
rh e hard edges of reactivity to self and other, th e hard edges of our
life. It hel ps us to acknowledge and rely upon th e deep goodn ess
within and beyond us-to take refu ge in th e power of ge nuin e love
and co mpassion, to sense it as a real and ever- present refu ge wh en-
eve r we recall it. By learning through thi s meditati on ho w pro-

found ly we can let be into th e simple receiving of love, we also
strengthen the skill of letting be into th e natu ral ease of deep inner
knowin g and peace, th e wisdom beyond self- grasping w hose prac-
tice is intro duced in th e next chapter.

2. Letting Be:
Relaxing Into Natural Wisdom
Reading T ips (or This Chapter

This chapter introduces the perspec tive of th e Dzogc hcn tra diti on
ofTibct, drawing upon qu otes frol11 a few of its twcnri eth -century
masters. Some readers will find this material treme ndo usly fresh and
bcaucifu l. O th ers;H fi rst may find it daunting. The Dzogchen view
is vast and all-encompassing. It is impossible to unders tand merely
by thin king hard abo ut it. Indeed, much of the language is intended
to pull liS beyo nd the narrow confines of o ur usual thi nking process.
Often the words have an aesth etic fun ction akin to profo und, evoca-
ti ve poe try that can transport us beyo nd o ur accusto med ways of
seeing. Please read th e chapter in that spirit, letting it engage not
onl y yo ur thinkin g mind hut you r aesth eti c appreciation , intuition,
and hea rt. As you first enter into th e meditation below, don't worry
if yo u've full y understood th e material that precedes it. Rath er, let
th e meditation instructions ge ntl y evoke your intuiti ve capaci ty to
relax deepl y and to enjoy th e essential good ness of yo ur bei ng
beyo nd self-clingi ng.
Th e Innate Pure Nature o( Mind

Th e fundamental natu re of mind is sheer lucidity, free and

unfettered by co ncepts slich as subject and object; a profo und
luminosity free from partiality and fi.x ation, a free-flowin g
co mpas.s io nate expressio n of indefinabl e, li mitless emptiness,

un obsc ured by thinking. Tho ught is bo ndage; the inuneasur-
able o penness of empty awareness is freedom . Compassion
fo r th ose bou nd within their own illusory constru cts, m.ind-
forged manacles, and self- imposed limitations, spontaneously,
un o bstru ctedly, and inex haustibly springs fOfth .
Nyos hul Khen R.inp oc h e~
What N yoshul Kh enpo calls " th e fundamental nature of mind" is

o ur fundam ental, innate awareness. This pure aware ne ss is th e
ground of all experi ence: all our thoughts, feelings, and perceptio ns.
As such, it is natura lly all- inclusive and w ide open. OUf dualisti c
thinking process te nds to limit our attention to a very narrow sense
of self (as "subj ect") that seems to stand compl etely apart fro m O[h-
ers (as "obj ect"). Yet our fundamental, pure awa reness, even as it
gives ri se to suc h dualistic thou ghts, is a vast expanse of knowing
that transcends all such limitations, " unfettered by co ncepts."
Nothing within our fundamental awareness is substantial or gras-
pable in any way. Awareness per se has no colo r, no shape, no cen-
ter or bOll ndary, and nothing co ncrete to be found in it.
Fundamental awareness is thus "a profound lumin osity" that is nO[
o nly cogni za nt but a " limirless emptin ess," mea nin g th at it is to taBy
insubstantial and unobstructed by anything. For this reason, o ur basic

awareness is also described as "primordially pure," for th ere has never
been anythin g in it substantial enough to stain o r obstruct it. O ur
aware ness therefore has the potential to co me co self- recognition as
a vast expanse of infinite openness and cogniza nce, like a bo undless

sky pervaded by sunlight.
In Sllm, D zogc hen masters explain th at Ollr innate, basic awa re-
ness, w hi ch is also ca ll ed I/atllre of mil/d, has two esse nti al aspec ts: (T)
it is cognizant, knowin g, aware, and (2) it is totally open, for it is
empty of any substantial entity. The cognizan ce and openn ess are
Leltillg Be ~ 35
infinite, undivided, and intrinsically free of any co nstriction or fix-

ation on a "self" reacting against an " other. "
Im porL'ln tl y, as Nyoshul Kh enpo implies, the cogniza nt, knowi ng
aspect of our aware ness possesses powerful energies. When our atten-
tion is limited [0 self-concemed thoughts and reactions, those ener-
gies take shape in deluded, self-cente red emotions like fear,
possessive ness, and hatred, leading to hannful actions dut throw us
repeatedly into suffering. Dzogchen practice cuts th e root of such suf-
fering, by letting our innate awareness come to vivid recogniti on of
its infinite, emp ty nature, which lacks any substantial self Then all
:lspects of experi ence are recognized as the expression of that sam e
pure awareness, like sunrays recognized by th e sun as irs own radian ce.
Through that profound recogni tion , thoughts that had pre viously
f0n11ed into chains of self-centered thinkin g and emotion are spon-
taneously released within their own ground of empty knowingness,
like ocean waves self-releasing into their own watery bed. Then the
energies that had fueled deluded emotions are freed to manifest instead
as boundless energies of love, compassion, and liberating power,
directed to all beings who remain caught in ego-centered thou ght,
fear. and reaction. So Khenpo concludes: " Thought is bondage; the
immeasurable openness of empty awareness is freedom. Compassion
for those bo und within th eir own illusory constructs ... and self-
imposed limitations, spontaneously, unobstru ctedly, and inexhaustibly

SprinbFS forth. "
Kh enpo's tradition is called "Dzogchen," /latl/ral great peifectioll,
because when our innate, pure awareness co mes to self-recognition,
all aspects of experience are simultaneo usly recogni zed as esse ntially
pu re and perfect from the beginning. Through that recognition, the
innate capaciti es and energies of a buddha, previously hidden in our
minds, are freed CO manifest spontaneously. Because such capacities

abide in th e very nature of our minds, even now, they arc said to
comprise our bllddha lIatlfre.
T o sum up , the practice of D zogchcn aUows the fundam ental

nature of o ne's luind, the boundless expanse of pu re awa reness and
openn ess, to attain stable self- recogn itio n. That is enli ghte nm em :
the enduring recognition of all experience as th e radiam expression
of primordiaUy pure awareness. This reali zat ion cuts thro ugh the
self-imposed limitations of one's mind to unl eash tremendous li ber-
ating powers o f love, co mpassion, joy, and creati vity from th e
gro und of one's being, which can inspire and uplift man y o th ers. It
is also th e fo undatio n of a wi se equanimity that se nses all o thers as
essentially undi vided from one's self, making one's love and com-
passion un co nditio nal, all-inclusive, and inex haustibl e.
Inherent in this great emptiness-this openn ess and lumi-

nosity, th e {rue nature of one's mind, th e innate Great Per-
fection-a re inconceivable qu aliti es, all of the enlightened
qualiti es of the Buddhas of all directio ns .... These transcen-
den tal qualities are inherentl y present.. .and accessible even
today.
Nyos hu l Khen Rinpo c h e~
If stich enligh tened qualities are already give n in the very nattlre of our
being, w hy do n't we notice th em so mu ch of th c timc? What hides
our tremendo us innate capacity of goodness eve n from o ursel ves?
S,ms,r,: T he Struggle of Self-Grasping

19norallC! Hides Gllr i nnate Nature

Mistakenly perceiving th e .. .innate wakefuln ess of primor-
dial awareness for a fi xed self or soul-our OWI1 egoic, indi-
vidu al e>.::is tence-we en m esh and bind o urselves time after

time, ti m e witho ut end. Ignorance is the sole ca use o f wan-
deri ng in sa msara. Buddhas know and understand w hat
Leltillg Be ~ 37
ordin ary se nti ent bei ngs ignore , misund erstand and over-
loo k: the tru e original nature of one and all. That is the sale
distin cti on between Buddhas and ordi nary beings.
N yoshul Khen Rinpoche 6
As NyoshuJ Kh enpo declares, habits of thought work below the

surL.1Ce of conscious awareness, hidin g our innate na ture from us.
Each moment th ere is a subconscious movement of anxiety with in
our minds-a subtl e graspin g th at see ks to fill th e totall y insubstan-
tial and open nature of experience with a co nstricted, substantial,
:lI1d isolated se nse of self. Moment by mom ent our thoughts close
ofT th e natural aU-incl usive ness of awareness to crea te and grasp on
to a narrow, concrete, and un changing sense of self, seeking in that
way to feel 5..'lfe and protected from d1e vast, in tangible mystery of
experience as it really is. That patterning of thought is what Buddhist
masters call igllorl1l1ce. beca use while trying to create a se nse o f safccy,
it just co nstru cts a del uded world of anxiety and sufferin g arou nd
oncself-a world offear and struggle, called salllsara.
This Buddhist view of " th e Ll11" from our pure, originalnarure
differs from th e biblical view, for it is not perceived as hav ing hap-
pened once and for all in some mythi cal beginnin g. Rath er, this
"£, Uing <lway" is constantly reoccurring here and now, as our sub-
co nscious fear of the open ness of expe ri ence struggles each mom ent
to crea te and grasp on to the appearance of a narrow, un changin g
self-- a self bo und up wi thin a small wo rld of sdf-ce ntered con-
cern. Our ongoi ng stream of experie nce is patterned by mome n-
ta ry thoughts inw an organized perso nali ty {hat can ce r{ain ly be

referred to as " I" or " me," but there is no unchanging, substantial,
isolated self {Q be found there of {he sort our minds keep workin g
fO establish .
The mere th ouglu of self, of " J," is sufficient to orga nize our expe-
rience and personality so we can fun cti on successfull y at hom e or
work. " ) am Dr. Jones and 1 am here to examine you r X-rays." T hat
is helpful to kno w. The problem is that our minds superimpose a fur-
ther beliefi n a self that stands apart fr0111 thought. We commo nly say,
" I am thinking .. . ," implying that there is someone separate fr0l11 the
thinking who does the thinking. But upon investigatio n, the Buddha
taught, no such thin ker, separate from thou ght, can be fo und. The
" thinker" is th e product of the thinki ng, not th e other way aro und.
We have difficulty facing the si mpl e tru th that our se nse of self is
nude LIp each mom ent by changing thoughts, because OLlr minds are
so acc ustom ed to the mistaken belief in th e self as unchanging
think er and b"Tasp so tightly to th at belief. Yct upon investiga tion ,
the truth becomes obvious. If you encounter someone you hate ,
yo u suddenly seem to become a hateful "self" in that instant, don 't
you? If you encounter someone you adore, you seem to become an
ado rin g "seJf" in that moment. The sense of self changes so radically
and so quickJy because it is created by thou ght within each mo men-
tary co ntext. The continuity of thought and memo ry gives us the
impression that th e " thinker" hasn 't changed; wh en actually, the
strea m of th o ught that makes th e " thinker," th e se nse of self, has
been changing contin ually.
Try snappin g your fingers rapidly. Though ts of self are like th e
fi nger SI1J.ps, w hich occur rapidly and in co ntinu ity. Blltjll st as there
is no un cha ngin g snap behind all the momentary snaps, likewise

th ere is no unchangin g self, no think er, behind all the thoughts of
sel( Yet, over th e co urse of our li ves, thoughts flow frOI11 our fun -
dam cntal, innate awareness in whatever patterns of self-centered
cot1ce m o ur minds have grown accustomed to . And our minds grasp

tightly to this ego-centered orientation, seeking sa fety there. But
instcad of providin g auth enti c safety, that orientation o nly leads to
recurrent fea r and sufferin g.

Leltillg Be ~ 39
Life BeCOllles tbe Struggle to Support tbe Fal" S"''' of Self

Throu gh such pattern s of self-grasping, li fe beco mes an ongoing
stru ggle, beca use eac h situation feels like it must be interpreted to
establi sh an un changi ng, co ncrete self that does n' t ac tually exist!
Within th e subsequent flow of self- absorbed thought , other beings
are redu ced to narrow o bjects of self- interest, as if th ere were noth-
ing mo re to th em . Eac h encounter and each other being is inter-
preted to make thi s merely fabricated sense of self fee l more rea l,
mo re substanti al. Wh en others seem to prop up thi s fragil e sense of
self, we like th em. Wh en others seem to undcrcut it, thus makin g
it feel less real, wc di slike or hate them , sin ce th e act of hati ng makes
the self feel real. And th ose w ho seem irreleva nt to Ollr sense of self,
such as strangers on the street, appear to have no value at all . So we
don' t ca re about them .
Bein gs are not merely th e narrow , di sto rted identi ties th at Oll r
ego-centered minds label onto each , as if this one were rea lly just a
"stran ger," no thing mo re; as if that o ne were reall y just "annoyin g,"
nothi ng more. Simply put, thro ugh the lens of self-grasping, we
co nstantly mistake o ur own redu ctive th oughts of everyo ne fo r th e
ac tu al people. We mistake o ur restricted and partial tho ughts of self
and other for th e fullness of self and other. Identi fyi ng w ith those
redu ctive th ou ghts, w e cling tightly to th e world th at th ey creatc,
Ull:l ware that it is a mental creatio n.

This mi stake is hard fo r us to notice, beca use it is not o nl y an
individual but also a social constm ction in whi ch we are aU C0111-
plicit. "SaUy said that! Isn't she stupid?" "Isn't Jim aje rk?" " Bob's a
rea l team playe r. Don ' t you agree?" Our conve rsa tion s make it
seem , in the moment , as if each person is merely the redu cti ve label
that he o r she has been called. Nothing more. And that helps us to
co nstru ct narrow group iden tities that preven t us frol11 feeling empa-
th y and compassio n for th ose outside our ow n group.
By continuall y mi sta kin g o ur limited th o ughts of beings for th eir
full rea li ty, we hide fcom o urselves th c tre mc ndo us capacity of

good ness that d wells in the very nature of th eir minds. We are like
an as tro naut in space w ho has th e oppo rtun ity to gaze upon the vast
mystery of the universe but instead keeps looking at himself in the
mi rror, obsessi ng abo ut the shape of his nose! Th e wo rld and its
inhabitants are a vast, deep mystery. But instead of sensin g the
beauty, mystery, and holiness of each bein g, o ur minds red uce all o f
them in th o ught to narrow objects of suffocatin g self- co ncern. As
o th ers react similarly to us, we socially reinfo rce th e habi t ofmistak-
ing o ur distorted thou ghts of each other fo r th e fullness and mys tery
of eac h other. This is part of th e class ical mea nin g of the: Buddhist
term JWfII /{J (ac tion), th e in grained habit of re-actin g to a lIT own nar-
row tho ughts of everyo ne so as to make o ur tho ught- made sense of
selffeel rea l.
As we cI ing to th ose w ho reinforce o ur sense of self, hate those
who undercut it, and simply do n' t care abo ut th e o thers, we con-
tribute unconsciously in little and big ways to all our social proble ms.
Wi tho ut conscio us awareness, our reac tio ns to others feed disco rd
and violence in o ur £1nUli es and co nunun itics and a ge nera l spirit of
mu tual distru st. O ur behaviors fuel manifo ld addictions, grasping
o n to whatcve r substan ce or di strac ti o n seems to pacify tro ublin g
th o ughts o f self and oth er for a little whil e. As a social dynami c,
many indi viduals, each seeking to establish and reify their o wn se nse
of self, com c toge th er in large groups and nati o ns to consum e f.1r
more reso u rces than th ey need and to seek econo mic and political
do mi na nce ove r ot her gro ups. Thus, indi vidual pattc rn s of self-
cel1 teredn ess, hatred, fear, and apa thy translate sociall y into eco-
nomic oppression, massive environmental damage, and rec urrent
war. Th is is the suffering of samsara in its modern fo ml . Indi vidual
and social life ca ught in the delusio n of self-grasping becomes end-

less struggle, mutual distrust, fear, and confli ct. 7
Leltillg Be ~ 4 '
The Purpose of Spiritual Practice

So it is self-centered confusion that hides the great, innate capaci-
ties of goodness that abide in the natu re of our minds, in our buddha
nature. In this light, the pu rpose of spiritual practice becomcs clear.
We practi ce to become recepti ve to th e tremendous capacity of wis-
dom and love that is hidden in our being, to let th e practice bring
these qualitics o ut with such force that they start to release us frol11
the ego-ce ntered ca uses of suffering in our minds, free in g us fin ally
to become what we had most deeply intended-a real benefactor for
this world. The goal of the path is to rediscove r our original nature
of pure awa reness prior to the momentary co nfu sio ns of self-cling-
ing and to bring o ut its abiding qualities: the wise eq uanimity thac
se nses o th ers as undi vided from self, love and compa ssion for all in
that li ght, deep inner peace, joy, and th e crea ti ve, liberating powe r
to benefit many others.
A wonde rfu l scene in the movie H arry Potter alld the Chamber of
Seaets illustra tes Ollr situati on. In a duel with another yo ung w izard ,
a snake is hurled at Harry Potter. The snake, baring its fa ngs, hisses
menacingly at the children. Suddenly H arry makes strange hiss ing
sounds that th e snake seems to understand , causi ng him to rerreaL
H any thinks he spo ke English, teiling th e snake not to harm any-
o ne. But H arry 's friends later inform him , to his surprise, that he
was actu all y spea kin g in snake lan guage, "parse! tongu e," a language
no rmall y incomp rehensible to humans. H arry is stunned! "How ((JII
I speak a lallguage I didll't blOW I could speak?" he asks.
Si milarly, th e " language" o f love and w isdofn, deep down, is a

language th at we already know. We each have a hidden ca pacity to
speak an intuitive language that communi cates w ith o th ers' hean s
and min ds below the " radar" or selr-co ncern ed thin ki ng. Und er
the right conditio ns, we find access to it, as Aliso n Luterman did in
her corn er store. T he spiritual practices in thi s book ca n trigger o ur
42 .<:/ AUlllkcllillg Th rough Love
ab ili ty to speak a language of th e hea n th at we didn't kn ow we

kn ew. Li ke the clerk in the corner store, tht:y can help us awa ken
to a goodness we didn't know we had, to recogni ze it in oth ers, and
to evoke it from them .
But j ust understa ndin g this intellectually is not eno ugh . Some-
one can hear Buddhist teach111 gs such as th ese, be inspired by th em ,
believe th em , and think that by identi fyi ng with this new se t of
beliefs he has beco me a spiritual person. That would be a mi stake.
When I wa s a teenager, I loved to listen to Bob Dyla n. One of my
favorite songs had this verse:
I do n' t want to f..1ke yo u out,

take or shake or forsake you out.
I ain't lookin for you to feel like me,
see like m e, or be like me.
All I really \Va nna do
is ba by be frien ds with you.
The song expresses an un co nditional acceptance of persons with-

out tryin g to ge t them to conform to yo ur ow n needs. This was
appealin g to me as a teenager, in a world of peer pressure and social
judgm ent. Because I identified strongly with th e song's wo rds as I
sa ng it, I believed th at I was actually practicing their mea nin g. But

to identify yourself with a belief in un conditional acceptance for all
perso ns is quite different from embodying such an attitud e in yo ur
responses to all of th em. Ironically, I see in retrospec t, r looked
down o n all so rts of people and groups simply beca use th ey did not
show suffic ient appreciation for Bob D ylan and hi s so ngs!
These da ys, we tend to think that merely to believe strongly in th e
good constitutes beillg good, especiall y w ith rega rd to religious and

cthi calmattcrs. That mistake gives us an unrealistic sense of alIT own
group as th e good ones, th e ones w ho share our belief in th e good
Leltillg Be ~ 43
(and therefo re , like liS, are good) as opposed to th e others. In this

way we un co nsciously disrespect and endanger others (a nd ulti-
mately oursel ves) in the name of the good.
For authentic spiritual progress, something has to interfere with
all such pan erns of self-ce ntered dece ptio n, undercut thcm so dec i-
sively th at o ur innate capa city for self- tra nsce ndin g, all - inclusive
love call ac tu all y manifest-an actual power of goodn ess, not j ust a
belig in goodn ess. Th at requires effec tive meth ods of practicc that
are no t just forms of individual and social identifi cati o n with self-
protec tive beliefS.
NOllcoflceptual and COllceptual Practices

In Slim, great powers of goodness are hidden in us, but o ur habits of
thought o bstruct and hide them from us. What arc we to do? Stop
thin kin g? That wo n't work. Even i f we could become that qu ies-
cen t and stop tho ughts for quitc somc time, there would still remain
in o ur minds the subtl e tendcnci es to fixate on experience and grasp
o n to dualism. Such tenden cies are not overcome just by stopping
th o ughts for a time.
We ha ve to learn to let our innate pure awareness co me to self-
recogniti o n, to th oroughly sense its own empty, cognizant, and lim-
itless nature and to stabilize in that recogniti on. T hen the energies
of our self-ce ntered thou ghts and emotions ca n be frecd to take

expression as en lightened Jnitudes and activities of compassion. T hat
is the path to e nli ghtenm ent. But how is it to unfold?
T wo kinds of practi ce empower this process-no nco nccptual and
co nceptual N()I /C()1/ceptllalmeditation is an intuitive knowing that is

not delimited by conceptual panem s of tho ught- innate pure aware-
ness itself is what does the knowing. COllceplllal practices employ spe-
cial fonlls of th o ught, image, and attitude to harmo ni ze us wi th the

mind's infin ite nature by evoking its innate enlightened qualities-
qualities such as boundless love, compassion, tranqu illity, joy, and
equanimity. As the nature of mind is realized, those qualities are

embodied in ways that communicate enlightenment to others.
N Oll conceptual Practice

There is no thou ght tha t is something o th er th an voidn ess;
if yo u recognize the void nature of thoughts at the very
mo ment th ey ari se, they w ill di ssolve. Atta chm ent and
hatred w ill never be able to disturb the mind. Del uded emo-
tions w ill collapse by themselves. No nega ti ve actions will be
accumu lated, so no suffering wi ll follow.
Dil go Kh yentsc Rinp oc h e~
Innate wakefuln ess, nonconceptual wisdom , nondu al pri-

mo rdi al awareness-Buddha mind-is suddenly unshea th ed
th e mo m ent dualistic mind dissolves.
Nyoshul Khen J'linpoche 9
In non conceptual meditation, w e just test in th e no ncol1cep tu al

nature of mind- the vast expanse of cognizance and openness that
is beyond all conceptual and ego-centered frames of reference. Ini-
tially, w e nccd to learn how to "get out of th e way"-how to let
our ordinary, dualisti c patterns of thinking and grasping on to " self"

and "oth er" rela x so mu ch that th ey begi n to £111 apart by them-
selves. All ex periences of subject and object are traced back to th e
no ndual clarity of their fundamental nature. Like ocea n waves set-
tlin g back into th eir own watery esse nce, all though ts and patterns
of experien ce are permitted to settle into th eir own cognizant,
empty nature, wh ere th ey are recogni ze d as spo ntan eous ex pres-
sions of primo rd ially pure awareness (Tibetan: rig pa).

In Dzogchen tradi tion, sti ch nonco nceprual medi tatio n is also
called Cllftil1g throllgh (Tibetan: rrekcbo). This does not mean chat we
Leltillg Be ~ 45
try to cut off thou ghts. R ather, we learn to relax all tcndencies to fix-
ate on or grasp at subj ects and objects of tho ught. To "cut through"
in this sense is to let everything be just as it is. We can learn to let be
so profoundly that grasping on to dualism simply collapses by itself
In that moment, chains of self-clinging tho ught and emotion are cut
and innate pure awareness is " un sheath ed"-freed from conceptual
fixation. Th at non conceptual awa reness recognizes all thoughts, feel-
ings, and perceptions nakedly as its own radiant expressio ns, like the
sun recogni zin g its rays. Instead of formin g ego-centered th o ught
chains, thOllght'i self-release naturally within that recognition, as pat-
terns oflumin ous emptin ess, like patterns drawn on wa ter.
Noncon ce ptualmeditation is also call ed ultimate practice, because
it reveals the ultimate nature of mind as an infinite expanse of cog-
ni zance and all-penetrating open ness. The non co nceptual aware-
ness that man ifests th rough such practice is also called tran scendental
w isdom (Sanskrit: p'qillapammita), because it transcends all concep-
tu al, dualisti c, and ego-centered frames of reference. It liberates the
mind from all sti ch fixations and grasping tendencies. When th e
word Illisdom is used throu ghout thi s book, it refers to such nonCO ll-
ceptua! awaren ess or to ways of knowing that evoke and express it.
Conceptual Practi ces

... mind-training, loving-kindn ess, prayers, exc hangi ng one-
self and o th ers, and so forth- th ese practices may seem con-
ceptual and relati ve, but they actuall y in clude the absolute
tru th that is the very nature ofDzogchen: vast openn ess, big
mind, purity, freedom, and non-graspin g.
Nyoshul Kh en Rinpoc he 'u
It is easy to talk about " relaxing all tcndc ncies of graspin g" so as
to awa kcn to infini[e, non co nceptual awareness and its boundl ess
excellent qualities. Bm o ur habit is to hold on [0 ourselves co nti n-

ually within a process of self-centered thought. How can we lea rn
to surrender ourselves so profoundly? How can we learn to trust the
mysterious reality that lies beyo nd the narrow confi nes of ego
enough to release o urselves into it?
Tibctan traditions are well aware of this problem . Somehow th e
concep tu al mind of th o ught and imaginati on, our min ds as we now
expcrience them, have to be enlisted in th e process of awake nin g.
Co nceptual thought mllst be used as a bridge to 110l1co nceptual w is-
dom, as a suppo rt for it rather than as an obs tacle. For ce nturi es,
Ti beta n masters such as Nyoshul Kh cnpo h:l.VC taught conceptual
practices (mi nd training) that use th o ugh t and image to help people
rcIax their g rip on themselves, relinquish their fear of the myste ry ,
and hannoni ze themselves with th e infinite nature of th eir minds.
Receptive Devotioll alld the Bolllldles, Exttlldillg of Leve

Two kinds of conce ptual practice are especially effecti ve to help
carry the m in d past its limitatio ns. The fi rst is culti va tio n of a strong
devotion and receptivity to the qualities of enli ghtenm enc. The sec-
ond is the exte nding oflove and compassion to innumerable beings.
R everent devotion to the qualities of en lightenment strength ens
our receptivity to rh em and empowcrs o ur will to bc offered up to
them and to th eir ultimate gro und- the infinite, undi vided natu re of
mind. To ex tend love boundlessly to bein gs helps liS sense all beings
as undivided from ourselves in the infinite, undi vided nature of mind.
Such co nce ptual practices are also called ,elative prac ti ces, beca use
while they are not in themselves th e infinite nature of mind, they

help o ur fi n ite, thinking minds open to that nature. importantly,
reverent devotion and impartial lo ve don't just prepare the ego-
ce ntered mind to rea lize its infinite nature. W hen that nature is real-
ized, lov in g co mpassion and reverence become natural ways to
express and embody it for others, so that th ey may recogn ize th eir
Leltillg Be ~ 47
ow n enli ghte ned po te ntial. Such enligluened co mmunication

occ urs in co untless ways, even very subtle ones.
For examp le , my teac her Nyoshul Khcnpo was revered boch as
an enlightened master and a leamed scholar of Dzogc hen tra diti on.
For years he su ffered fro m an illness that prevented him from speak-
ing. And w hen he did recover his ability to spea k, his voice remai ned
very hoarse and barely audibl e. But the power of his rea li zation was
so great that he became renowned for his ability to communicate th e
power of enli ghten ment to others, mysteriously, wi th out spea king.
T welve yt'ars ago Lama Surya Das invited Kh enpo to give a teach-
ing in Cambridge, Massachusetts, at Harvard University. Hundreds
of people, inc1uding sc holars, students, and we ll- kn own Buddhist
teachers from through out New England flooded the room and
spilled Oll t into halls nearby, anxious to hea r the words of such a
renow ned master. But after Kh enpo was formall y in troduced and
th e audience was wa iting with baited breath for hi s words, he didn't
speak! He folded hi s hands in a reverent gesture of homage to all the
enlighte ned on es. Then he just sat there silently before them, relaxed
and unmoving . Yet over the next ten minutes of silence th e natural
ease, tranqu illi ty, and reverence that his body expressed, and the gen-
tle power of his co mpassionate presence, qui etly uplifted th e minds
of the audienc e. Then he gave a shorr calk, barely above a w hisper,
that was trJnslated by Lama Surya Da5.

Kh cnpo passed away years ago. Yet even today, just to recall his
body sitting w ith slI ch ease pulls me out of my ordinary fram e of
mind into peace and gratitude. The qualities of nJtural great peace,
love, co mpassion, receptivity, and reverence that Khenpo had prac-

ti ced througho ut his life had beco me so natural to him, so sponta-
neo us, that his very being communi cated them to oth ers. He
exempl ifi ed th e libe rating power of such practices firsr to harmonize

the mind with its bo undless nature, then to embody its vast quali-
ties in the most direct and simple ways.
Relative practices that extend love and compassion all-inclusively

are developed throu ghout the rest of this book. I will say something
further herc about the devotional practice of revercm recepti vity,
w ith reference to Tibetan tradition.
Tibeta n Buddhists ge nerally begin their meditation s by recallin g
spiritual benet:1Ctors who embody for th em th e enlightcn ed qu al-
ities of the infinite, non col1ceptual nature of mind. The ir reve r-
ence and receptivity to th e qualities of these be nef.1cto rs becomes
so strong tlut th ey lea rn to trust th e mysteriou s, in finite gro und of
those qua li ti es: the vast expans e of openn ess and cognizan ce
beyo nd self-clinging. Through th e power of such recepti vity and
trust, they are enabl ed to rel ease th eir egos in to th e infinite nature
of mind itself
Tibetans do th is by envlsionin g their spiritual benef.1ctors- th eir
lamas and buddhas and bodhisattvas-as a radiant fi eld o f refu ge
before them . Then th ey receive the lumino us blessings and energies
of th eir benef.1ctors' enduring love, compassio n, liberating w isdom ,
and spiritual powe r into their whole being. The warm, radiant
energy of th ose qualiti es helps th em to relax th eir ego-ccnrered ness,
to m el t away th eir self- protectiveness, and to sense the radiant
ground of those qualities as absolute goodn ess. Pulled beyond th em-
selves in this gentl e way, th ey merge joyfully into o nencss w ith th cir
benef.1ctors within that ground, whi ch is th e infinite, non conceptual

nature of mind beyond separation (buddha mind, dharlllakaya). In
this way, a conceptual practice of devotion to the good ness of spir-
itual benef.1cto rs, and to th e infinite gro und of that goodn ess. pro-
vides th e m ost effective entry into nonconceptual meditati o n. II

We have already begun to practice in a similar way. We arc lcam-
ing to receive the radiant love of our benefactors (including spiritual
bcnef.1 ctors) so full y that it helps melt away o ur fro zen egos, release
us from o ur self-protective stance, and let us merge with o ur bene-
f.1ctOrs in th e lumi nous ground ofthcir un conditio nallovc-innate
Leltillg Be ~ 49
pure awareness. To receive th e blessing and e nergy of th eir love

into every part of our being carries us gently beyo nd o urselves into
the spirit of trust and openness that can begin CO release us inco the
infinite, nonconcepmal nature of mind. T o discover our benet:1c-
cors, th en , is to di scover our own auchenti c field of reverent devo-
tion and refuge. For th e love that flows from th em gives us access
to th e gro und of their lo ve-buddha nature, pure awa reness
endow ed with enli ghtened qualities, the ultimate so urce of protec-
tion for all .
Introducing the Meditation of Natural Awareness

Surrenderillg COlltrol to the Wt'sdom oj Natural Awarwess
The mai n prac ti ce of this cha pter is nonco ncep tual meditation.
Instead of attem ptin g to assert control over our experi ence so as to
come to know it better, we do j ust the opposite-we give up the
attempt to control anythin g and let our innate pu re awareness do the
know in g. This is done by relying upon the natural power of body,
breath , and mind to enable all aspects of experie nce to calm, se ttle,
and clarify by themselves. The senses are left wide open, the awa re-
ness unrestri cted . Then th e thinkin g mechani sm th at fixates nar-
rowly 011 "self" and " other" can no longer sus tai n itself, permittin g
the nature of mind, infinite innate pu re awareness, to reveal itself.

As this innate awa reness recognizes th e empty, radiant nature of all
experiences, aU thoughts and emotions naturally self-release like rip-
ples on water, and th e natural great peace of enli ghte nm ent dawns.
No nconceptualmeditation is a practice of deep receptivity and pro-

found allowing-letting a11 be just as it is.
Reverml Devolioll He/ps Ihe Milld Surrellder 10 l IS Pure Nalllre

But fo r most of us it is /l ot easy to let be so full y into nOilconceptual
reality! It is the receivin g oflove, a conceptual practice of reve rence,
receptivity, and devotion, which evokes eno ugh trust in th e basic

good ness of rea li ty that we can take refuge in that reality and relax
into its mys tery. So we start th e follo w in g meditati on by receiving
love deeply from o ur benefactors and by mcrgin g into o neness w ith
them in the luminous, insubstantial ground of that love beyond se p-
aration . Th en we can relax more subtl e tendencies of holdin g o n to
ourselves by surrendering to the natural powers of o ur body, breath,
:md mind. As we thus lea rn , Jjttle by litde, to let th e mind relax into
its own basic co nditio n prior to conceptualiza tion , it can begin to
reveal its inmost nature.
Ka rmic Merit alld the importance oj D edicatioll

The spiritual power of all such practices of reverenr devo tion, love,
and w isdom pulls us beyond ourselves, so that th e qu ali ti es of our
buddha na ture can increasingly manifest. Buddhists call that spiritual
power kanni c merit (Sanskric: pl/Ilya), mea ning a force fo r weU-being
and goodness generated by powerfillly good intentions and actions-
a force that can lift us toward full enlightemn ent: the complete ac tu-
aliza ti o n of o ur buddha nature. To attain full cnli ghtenm ent is to
become a treme ndous power of goodness for the wo rld , inspiring
many others to reali ze their similar potential. The kam1i c merit from
virtuou s practi ces also strengthens our inner capacity for happiness and
joy. But we don't want to waste such spiritual power by fritterin g it

awa y in tri vial, self-ce ntered ways. So we conclude every practi ce of
love, devotion, and wisdom by dedicating its merit, its spiritual power,
to our complete reali zation of enlightenment for th e s3ke of all beings.
The meditati o n below thus has three parts: (I) receivin g th e w ish
of love and mergi ng with our field of refuge, (2) letting the natural
power of body, breath, and mind furth er release us into natural
awa reness, and (3) dedicating the karmi c merit-the spiritual power
of the meditation- to full enlightenm ent for the sake of all. All three
parts can be compl eted in thirty to forty minutes. Be sure to allow
Leltillg Be ~ 51
a short pa use at each demarcation, [0 give you time to explore and

relax into eac h phase of the instruction .
M editation: Letting Be in Natural Awareness

Part l: Rif"ge-Receivillg the Blessillg of Ullcollditiollal Love
Sit in a rel axed way with back straight, on cushi on or chair,

eyes open , softly gazin g sli ghtly dow nwa rd. R.ecall you r
benefactors-ones rememb ered from your personal life and
revered spiritu al bein gs who extend their love to all. Envi-
sion th ei r smiling faces before yo u. R.ecall th em as se nding
you the wish ofl ove and remember its simple meaning: the
unconditional wish for you [0 have decpest well-being, hap-
pincss, and j oy.
Imagin e their wish as a gencle radiance, like a soft showe r
of hea ling rays. Bathe your w hol e body and mind in that
tender energy, all the way down to your toes and fingertips.
Bask in it.
Trusting this wish oflove more than limiting thoughts of
yourself, receive it into yo ur whole being. Absorb th e healin g
radiance and energy oflove into every cell ofyour body, eve!),
corn er of yo ur mind. Bathe in th is; heal in this; rest in thi s.
After :1 little w hil e, join yo ur benefactors in th eir wish for

YOll. Wh ile receiving th e radi :1l1 ce of thei r love, men tally
repeat thei r wish wi th refe rence to yourself: "May this one

have deepest well- being, happiness, and joy." Affinn th e wish
repeatedly for yoursel f w hile :1ccepting your bene£1crors' love

even more deeply inco body and mind, communin g with
th em through its radia nce.
Finally, drop th e visuali zation and just relax into oneness

with that loving luminosity, releasing all frames of reference.
D eeply let be into that ge ntle, luminous w holeness beyond
separati on of self and oth ers. Enjoy just being-at C:lse, :H
rest, co mplete.
Part 2: Letting Be ill Natural Awareness
Notice w here you still feel any grasping wi thin th e body-

in the back, nec k, hips, or anus, perhaps. Wh ereve r you feel
sll ch grasping, let that gently release itself Relaxed and
calmly al ert, allow all bodily sensations to come and go as
th ey will, permitting everything to se ttle natllTall y in its own
way. Let go of any sense of comroL Just surrender to th e nat-
lI ral power of the body, letting it embody you . Feel th e gen-
de shift fro m controlling to allowing, from holding on to the
body, to just being embodi ed. Enjoy bod ily awareness in th at
way for a little w hile.
N ow notice any graspin g on to the breathing process any-

wh ere-in th e abdome n, chest, or throat. Let that rel ax,
allowing the breath to come under its own natural power,
brea thin g you. Sense th e gentle shift frol11 co ntrolling th e
breath to allowi ng it, frol11 holdin g on to th e breath to just

bein g breathed. Feel the breath all th e way in, all rhe way
o ut, as it brea th es you.
After a little w hil e, nmice any grasping within the mind to

th e thinkin g mec hani sm , identifi cation with chains of
Leltillg Be ~ 53
thou ght abo ut self and other, grasping on to th em as fram es

of reference. Let that feeling of holding o n rel ease itself, so
as CO unwind de ep inside. W ithout ide ntifyin g with
thoughts ofthe past or th e future, withom co nceptuali zi ng
th e prese nt, j ust let all thoughts and sensations arise and dis-
solve und er th eir ow n power, in their own way. e m th e
" kite strin g" on th oughts and let them fl y freely eve n as
rh ey :lri se .
In thi s way, let the mind unfurl naturally, of itself, and [.111
totally open-at ease, unrestricted, free of any foc us or
directcdn ess, three hundred sixty degrees all - perv:lsivc, wide
o pen. R aise th e gaze of your eyes to look ge ntly ahe:ld, tak-
ing in all at once, [Otally expansive. Let all bejust as it is, in
complete o pen ness and accep tance.
Sense th e open ness of awa reness, infinite and without ce n-

ter, in w h ich all phe nomena self- arise and self- di ssolve,
beyond clinging, beyond thin ki ng, beyond refe rence
poi nt-bo undless openn ess and cogni za nce, all-pervasive
like the sky. Let this vast expanse of fundament:ll awareness
se nse <'Ill th<'lt appears as its own radiant express ion, like th e
sky se nsin g its own rainbows. R est as that sky-like nature of

mind- all phenomena pennitted to self-arise and self- release
within th e infinite expanse of openness aware.
Part 3: Dedicatillg the Spiritual Power jor All
Feel th e power of this practice to pull you, even momentar-

ily, beyond self-grasping patterns of th ought and reaction,

to open yo u toward the tranquilli ty, freedom, and goodn ess
of yo ur inmost being. Prayerfu lly dedicate all such spi ritu al
powe r to the deepest well-being and libcracion of all bein gs,

eac h like yo u in needing and wa nting such joy and freedom.
Good work! Have a resr.
Calm Abiding and Liberating Insight

As 3 practitioner does this meciitacion over the course of many days
and months and beco mes more adept 3t lettin g 311 be in complete
openn ess, th e mind can increasingly se ttl e, calm, an d self-cla rify
imo 3 sP3clous state of profound, natural tranquillity. When this
st3ge is rea ched , th e meditation is call ed callll abiding (Sa nskrit:
sllal1latlla). There is stillness, peace, and quiet power in this state of
mind, wi th a wond erful feeling of whol eness. Self-centered emo-
ti ons, worries, and anxieti es settle o ut , and one feels spacious, joy-
ful , and blessed. T hinkin g may s[QP emircly for a w hile. And one
may experience a basic li ghtness of bein g, a sense of vast openness
and blissful energy.
But this is not yet recogni tio n of th e mind 's l1o nco nceptu31
nature. For w hile calml y abiding in this way, th e mind continu es
subconsciously to conceptualize a subj ec t and an o bject, someone
(subject) who is p3yin g attention to her state of mind (objec t). And
as lo ng as that co nceptual duali sm is maint3in ed, 3 subtle fixation

and gr3sping accom panies it, a form of holdin g on , w hich o bsc ures
the infinite natu re of mind. Beca use of that, w hen not forma lly
mcdit3tin g. all the provocation s of o ne 's li fe co ntinue to tri gge r
deluded, self-ce ntered thoughts and reac tio ns. T he very root of
one's delusions- the conceptual tendency to grasp o n to self and on
to du alism- has not yet been cut by th e actu al recogniti on of th e
ungraspable, empty nature of mind.

As the practice conti nues to deepen, one's ego oric nration can fi.u -
[her relax and release itself, which allows more subtle, subconscious
Leltillg Be ~ 55
forms of conce ptuali za tion and clinging to relax thcmselvcs and sclf-
dissolve. Experiences of subject and object are traced back to the
nondual clarity of th eir essential nature. Like waves se ttl ing into th eir
own watery essence, all parrerns of experience, as they arise, se ttl e
naturall y into th eir own cogniza nt nature, w here th ey are recog-
ni zed as spontaneo us expressions of radiant emptin ess. The primor-
di al, infinite ex panse o f openness and awa reness, beyo nd all
co nce ptuali za ti on, begins to disclose itself At thi s point calm abid-
in g is deep enin g into an actual recognition of the mind 's infinite
nature. That re cognition is called liberatilIg it/sight (Sa nskric:
vipas/iydluT). It is th e dawning of non conceptual awareness, transcen-
dental wisdo m .
At this stage, energies of mind that had fueled deluded emorions
start to be freed to manifest as qualities of in nate, pure awareness:
boundl ess ly inclusive love, compassion, and joy, deep tranqui lli ty,
and oth er libera tin g powers. Ego-centered reactions that had inhib-
ited such quali ties begin to release their grip. Instead of forming
tho ught chains, arising thou ghts self- liberate naturally as pa tterns of
luminous emptiness like ripples on wa ter. At thi s poi nt in practi ce,
one learns to recognize the fundamental nature of mind, an d to abide
within it, morc one n and more full y. One becomes increasin gly
accustomed to that way of being. Tlus pernuts th e innatc enli ghtcncd
qualities of fundam ental awareness increasingly to mani fcst.
Sharp Inquiries that Help Bring Out Liberating Insight

The above description of progress might give th e impression th at the

transition fro m calm abiding (slwl1Iatlw) to liberating insight
(vipashyalla) occurs by itself And that is possible for someone who
has acclImulated tremendous karmi c merit in the past. But to help

this transition, most practition ers necd also to rel y on incisive ways
of invcstiga tin g experi ence; sharp modes of inqui ry, wh ich hav e
been passed down to lIS by lineage masters. At the pro pcr ti mc in

our med itatio n practice such inquiries can brea k down the subcon-
scious fixa ti ons that obstruct liberatin g insight, help ing to release th e
mi nd fro m calm abiding into insighc. And even w hcn libcrating
in sight dawns , old co nce ptual habits tend to resurrect themselves in
subtl e fomlS of fi xa tion and clin gin g, like ice f0T111in g over water.
Then th e same modes of inquiry arc used to revivify the insight o r,
as Lama Surya D as likes to say, " to break apart the ice of subtl e co n-
ceptualiza ti o n and let th e waters of awareness fl ow freel y."
Inq uily is a fo rm of qu estioning, w hich is a conceptual form of
practi ce. But it uses concepts in a special way, to break do wn con-
ceptua l fi xa ti o ns and turn attention to th e natu re of mind beyond
conceptuali za tion.
Sometim es such an inquiry is laun ched in a spo nt.1 neous encounter
betwee n master and student. The lama may pose a qu estio n that sud-
dCIlJ y tu rns the student's J[[cmion in to her experi ence, brea king
apa rt co nceptual fra mes that she had unco nsciously assum ed.
For example, before I had children, I stayed fo r a period ofrimc
w ith o ne of my T ibetan teachers, Gen Lobsang Na mgyal. O ne day,
I fo und him starin g with fascinatio n at a dia gram of an atom in a
book that someone had given him. T he diagram showed how th e
ato m was co mp osed of subatomic palticlcs, th cmselves fo rm ed fro m
fi elds of energy. H e bec ko ned me to come ove r.

" Is thi s what yo u call an 'atom '?" H e as ked, pointing to th e
illustratio n .
" Yes," I said.
" But then," he said, gesturing towa rd the fields of energy depicted
in the diagram, " show me; w here is it?"
I stared at him, dumbfo unded.
"TIlere IS' no atom," he di d '''AtOI11 ,..

ec are. ISJust a name, a concept."
Suddenly, it fel t as if my mind and its narrow grip 0 11 the world

just coll apsed . There is nothin g th at could be pointed to as an atom
Leltillg Be ~ 57
111th e diagra m- just fields of energy upon w hich a labe l "atom "
could be put. Yet our minds habitually grasp to the things we expe-
rien ce, like "atolll," as if th ey stand on th eir own, apart fr0111 such
labeli ng. Geshe Lobsang looked knowingly at me, pointed to a
couch, and said: " R es t a w hile."
I rested on the couch for the next few hours in a state of deep
tranquilli ty, ease, and spaciousness. From that blissful state of aware-
ness, co nceptua l frames of reference kept attempting to erect them-
selves, as if to provide something to grasp or hold on [0. But even
as th ey arose, they just collapsed back into a state of nonconcep tu-
::tlity and [Otal open ness. Geshe Lobsa ng's inqui ry into th e "atom "
had pro voked a glimpse of recogni ti on.
Y cars ::tfter the incident with Geshe Lobsang, on a cold win ter
day, my five-yea r-old son J onathan and I we re spendin g time
togethe r in the yard. Jona th an picked up a thin sheet of ice that had
f0n11Cd 011 the gro ulld an d s~1re d at it with £.1 sciI13tiol1. T hen he
raised it above his head with grea t flourish and dropped it o n the
hard gro und w here, to his delight, it broke into many pieces. Sud-
denly, like in the mom ent afte r Geshe Lobsang's question, my en tire
fra m e of reference collapsed into nonco nceptual ope nness. After
some time, Daddy ambled back to the house [0 rest awhi le!
As we practice over months and years, th rough th e blessin gs of
our spiritual be nefac tors and the incisive modes of inquiry that they
impart, the persons and thin gs all aro und us begin [0 manifest as
messe ngers of wisdom. The world starts to reveal itself as our ulti-
mate teach er and benefactor.
Ove r th e ce nturi es in Tibet, various methods of sharp inquiry

have been passed down from masters to stu dents in a systematic way.
A few that I have found helpful are presented below. They are part
of the Dzogchen fou ndati onal practi ce to help di stingui sh the dif-
fe rence between the narrowly ego- ce ntered min d and the in fi nite
nature of mind . You can approach these inquiries as yo ur ow n fresh
encounter w ith th e wisdom of Tibetan masters who have tra nsmit-

ted them through the centuries to us.
Inquiring into the Arising and

Di ssolvin g of Phenomena
In o rd er to conquer th e high ground of th e un crea ted nature
of mind, we must go to the so urce and recogni ze th e origin
of o ur thou ghts.
Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoc he 12
We ca n make ... productive inquiries, such as, w hen a th o ught

arises, noticing: "That's a thought. Where does it arise
fr om.' . . . W Ilcrc d·d
1 ·It go.'"
Nyos hul Khen Rinpoche D
After you have practiced for many days th e three-part meditation

prese nted earlier in this chapter of receivin g lo ve, letting be in nat-
ural awa reness, and dedi ca tion , you can add th e followin g furth er
instru cti o n to yo ur practice.
At th e end of th e main part of the meditarion ,j ust before th e ded-
ication, your mind is res tin g in toral openn ess. Ri ght th en, as you
are meditatin g, let th e fo ll owi ng qu estion s direc t yo ur atte nti o n

sharply into th e nature of your experi ence.
Many phenomena appear- thoughts, feelings, perceptions. From
w here do th ey arise? Let thoughts arise now-{rolll where are th ey
arising? Eac h thought presents the appearance o f a subj ect and an

objec t, a self (thinker) and an other (something tho ught about). Frolll
where do th ose t"oll~/ITS
arise, those impressioHs of self aJ/d other? Sift
through experi ence gu ided by that qu esti o n. Do n' t j ust think abol/t
th e question. Rather, as if you were in a sandbox sifting through the
S<111d with your fingers to feel how it is, sift throllS" presem experi ence
Leltillg Be ~ S9
to se nse w hether any source for the thou ghts ca n be found. Let the
investigation penetrate your mind.
After so me time, pose this furth er question: Where are phenomena

dissolving-all th ese t h ought~, feel in gs, perceptions? Let thoughts
occur- is there allY place that they go whell Ihey disappear? Where do
the th oughts, all those impress ions of self and other, di ssolve with in
experi ence? Sift throllgh experi ence to se nse if any destination can
be found. Exp lore this for a short whil e, lettin g the in vestiga tion
penetrate your mind.
If you sho uld feel so mething hap pen-a kind of shift in co nscious-
ness, a se nse of coming to a stop, of being stru ck dum b, of a crack
or a gap in the heart of yo ur world, relax deeply into thar. Plumb
th at gap between thou ghts; trace th e radiance of ex periences to their
emp ty, infinite gro und. Release thus into ce nterless openness and
cogniza nce, releasing all frames of reference. Relax and let all be
j ust as it is-a1J pheno mena allowed to self-a rise and self- release
wi thin th e sky-like expanse of openn ess aware. Just rest like th at for
a little w hil e.
That wo uld complete the main part of the meditation. Then dedi-
cate th e liberatin g power of th e practice toward yo ur complete
enlightenment for the sa ke of all bein gs.

Such a sharp inquiry inco experie nce helps penetrate subco n-
sciolls habi ts o f grasping to "self " and "oth er" as if they we re
self-ex istent thin gs standing apart from cognitio n and designa-

ti o n. Inquirin g like this inco the arising and dissolving o f ex pe-
ri ences can ex pose and momentarily ilHerrupc Ollr sub conscio us
assum pti o n th at we confro nt a w o rld th at stands apart fro m o ur

experience of it.
Ac tuall y, th e o nly self and world we experi ence are the pattern s
of tho ught, perceptio n, and feeling w hose essential nature is ra diant
emptiness. And, more than we had no ticed , all those beings that we
had reacted to in fear, aversion, and clingi ng had been mistaken all
along fo r o ur own limited thou ghts of th cm . Patient practice of this
medi tatio n ove r mo nth s and years, with guidan ce fi'om those who
have deep experi ence of it, can in creasin gly brin g o ut th e innate
capacities of o ur mind 's nature: an all-encompassin g awa reness
w hose love and compassion are naturally all- in cl usive and unre-
stricted by th oughts of partiality.
This inquiry into the source and destination of experiences is o ne
important way Tibetan teac hers have hel ped their students to under-
cut their subco nscio us fixati ons. 1~ If that line of inqui ry doesn' t evoke
a fresh curi osity to investi ga te your experience, try o ne o f the other
lines of inquiry presented below. C hoose the i.nquiry that first captures
your interest, and ex plo re it in the meditati o n over many days. In
time, this ca n help you further appreciate the ocher lin es of inquiry,
which can then be explored in daily practice fo r ma ny more days,
deepening your experience of th e meditatio n of natu ra l awareness.
Alternative Lines of Inquiry

At the end of the main part of th e meditatio n, just before the ded-
icatio n. yo ur mi nd is restin g in total o penn ess and spaciousness.
R ight then. as yo u are meditatin g, let the fo ll owing q uestions di rec t

your attentio n sharply in to the natu re of your experience.
Who?
ftVI,Ois ex peri encing? Is there someone sepa rate fro m th e experi-
ences-separate fro m rh e thoughts, feelings, se nsatio ns? Or is yo ur
Leltillg Be ~ 6 1
sc nse of self o nly a patterning of experie nce itself, just a momen-

tary impression made by the flo w of thoughts? Who or what is expe-
riel/ci/lg? Turn attention direc tly toward the experi encer and relax
di rectly into it. If the se nse of "self" and " other" coUapses
mo mentarily, plumb that gap. Let go completely th ere, relinquish-
ing all fram es of reference, and let be for a li ttl e w hil e in utter
ope nn ess.
Shape, Center, alld BOI'lldary

With eyes open, many shapes appear. But docs the awareness that
is experiencin g th em have any shape? Does your JWJren css have
any boundary? Any divisions? Is there a " me" at the ce nter of aware-
ness, sepa rated from all the rest? Or is that impression of a " me" j ust
a pattern of thou ght? Does awaren ess pcr se ac maUy ha ve a shape,
or a bOllndary, or a center? Explore such questions. leering th e inves-
ti ga tion penetrate you thoroughly.
Color
With eyes ope n, I11Jny colo rs JppeJr. But docs the :l\va reness that
ex periences aU those colors have any color? Or is awa reness like a
clear crystal, penninin g colors to come through it whil e havin g no
color itself?
Location
With eyes open, many things appear to be located here and there.
But does th c aware ness that experi ences those things itself hJve a
location? Is yo ur awareness outside of you? Inside of yo u? But aren' t

"outside" and " inside" concepts that appea r within awareness?
Where is this awareness in which th oughts of " inside" and "outside"
appear? Does awareness even '/ave a location ? Exp lore this dee ply for
a while, lettin g the in vestigation penetratc you th oro ughly.
For each such inqui ry, don ' t j ust think abOI/l the question . Rath er,
let the qu estion direct your attention into your present experi ence
CO sense how it is, like sifting through sand w ith your fingers. The
point is not to ruminate over the qu estion or to think up so me cor-
rect an swe r. The point is to permit something fresh to happen , a
spontaneou s openin g to occur, a m o mentary short-circuitin g of
acc ustomed chains of tho ught and grasping.
If yo u should feel so mething happen-a kind of shift in con-
scio usness, a sense of coming to a stop, of bein g stru ck dumb , of a
crack or a gap in the heart of your world, relax deeply into that.
Plumb that gap betwee n thoughts; trace the radiance of experiences
to th eir emp ty ground.
Release thus into ce nterless openn ess and cognizance, relinquish-
ing all frames of reference. Relax and let all be as it is-all phenom -
ena allowed to self-arise, self-release within the sky-like expa nse of
openness aware. Just res t like that for a li ttle w hile.
After you've explored one of th e inquiries above and foll owed it<;
cmirc instru ction , you have completed the main part of the medita-
tion . You can th en dedicate the liberatin g power of the prac ti ce to
enli ghtenment for all.
Daily Practice and Typical Difficulties

What to Do abolft Distrat/ilfg Chailfs of Tholfght
Our habit of mind is to think continually about thi s and that. When
we fi rs t enter into meditation, the energy of this habit makes our
minds wander down pathways of thought and emo tion , one
thought tri gge ring the next in a chain . For all our meditations, th e
teachin g on this is clea r. Wh en you notice you arc distracted in thi s
way, gc ncly bring your attention back to th e meditation instructio n
Leltillg Be ~ 63
at hand . Fo r example. when receiving love, if you beco me di stracted

into chains of tho ught, as soon as you notice that happeni ng, j ust
bring your atte ntio n back to th e meditation instructio n of receiving
love. L'u er, w hen restin g in total openness, if you find yourselflost
in chains of th o ught, thinking about this and that, return to th e
instnt cti on of cuctin g th e " kite stnng" on th oughts. Simpl y return
to th e meditatio n instru ction at hand. 15
Tho ughts are th e radiant expression of our mind's clea r, quies-
ce nt , and infinitely spacio us nature. They ari se from that nature and
dissolve into it. Ourjob is not to struggle with them or to try to stop
th em} buc merel y to allow them the freedom to self- di ssolve inco
their own radiant, emp ty ground , like ocean waves dissolvi ng back
into their own wateriness.
The Receptivity 0/ Reverent Devotion

D eepms Trust ill the Nature oj Milld
Initially, as no ted, it is difIicuJt to relax and let be nearly as full y as
instructed. W e don ' t trust th e mystery beyond self eno ugh to fu lly
relax into it. The mo re deeply we learn to receive th e un conditi o nal
love that accepts us just as we are, the more we ca n trust and let be
into just w hat is, to relax into an intuiti ve knowin g beyond anxieties
of self-co nce rn. For thi s reaso n, I stron gly reco mm end beco min g
profi cient in th e devotional practice of receivin g love as presented

in chJp ter I be fore focusing more primarily o n the letting be prac-
ti ce of thi s chapter. R eceive the love of bene[.,c tors fo r at least
twe nty or thirty minutes eac h morning, and recall it seve ral times
during yo ur day for many days. This w ill prepJre the mind to trust
and relax into the meditation of this chapter.
Alo ng th e same li nes, some meditators initially feel anxiety w hen
introduced to the sharp inquiries above, a fear to loo k in to experi-

ence in such a penetra tin g way, sensing that it may undercut some-
thing that th ey don ' t feel ready to let go of (one's narrow se nse of
self grasped as separate from one's world). If yo u feel such fear, aga in,
deepen yo ur experi ence of receiving love in dail y practice. The
more we allow o urselves to receive such love, strengthening our
trust in irs so urce, the more we can allow such inquiries to direc t our
attemi on toward its source: the insubstantial nature of mind.
Then wh en you feel prepared and recepti ve, you ca n begi n th e
natural awareness meditation of this chapter. Do it daily for at least
several weeks, including one or more of the inquiries, before shift-
in g to th e m editation of th e next chapter. Of course, yo u can read
on through the bookl But typically we read fas ter than we progress
in m editation. So do eac h chapter's meditation dai ly for seve ral
weeks or months, shifting to th e next cha pter's meditati on only as
yo u ft.'ei ready to do so.
The Need for the Karmic Power

of Love and Compassion
What we normally call the mind is th e delu ded mind, a tur-
bulent vortex of thou ghts whipped up by atta chment, ange r
and ignorance. This mind, unlike enlightened awa reness, is
always bein g carri ed away by one delusion after another.
Oil go Khyenrse lZ.inpoche !6
H..eal progress toward calm abiding and insight ca n unfold throu gh

the meditation instmction and inquiries of this chapter. But progress
means that the practice shows us more of our minds. Progress mea ns
that we become far more conscio us of entrenched habits of self-

centered thinking, grasping, and emoting. As we thus see more of
oursel ves, we may initially feel discouraged , thinking we are
un iq uel y deluded! But th ere is no reason for di sco uragemenc We

are no different from those before us who awakened to th e freedom
in the nature of th eir minds.
Leltillg Be ~ 65
Before their enli ghtenm ent, eve n th e grea t Buddhist ma sters

we re deluded like the rcst of us, otherwise th ey wou ldn 't under-
stand so we ll what we are going through~ Instead of gettin g di s-
couraged as we see more of ourselves, we should rath er recogni ze
a differe nt implication. W e need something to empowe r th e mind
to furth er relinqui sh its deep-seated grasping. Often , our minds just
don' t have eno ugh spi ritual power to lift us so fully beyo nd our-
selves. This is why great prac tition ers of the past have spent tim e
" acc umu lating karmi c merit" by doin g a va ri ety of intensive,
repeated practices of devotion and extendin g love. Such prac tices
purifi ed th e obsc urations of th eir minds and evo ked th e spiritual
power fro m the nature o f their minds (karmi c merit) to carry them
past entrenched habits of clinging. The practi ces o f ex tendin g
boundless love and compassion that unfold in th e following chap-
ters help CO meet th is criti cal need. Buddhist traditions of Tibet and
In dia ha ve considered such cultivations trem endo usly powe rful
sources of karmi c m erit.
As at th e end of the rainy seaso n, the sun , ri sing in to th e clear

and cloudl ess sky, banishes all the dark spaces and glows and
shin es and blazes forth: ... so, a monks, non e of th e means
empl oyed (Q acquire karmi c merit has a sixtee nth part of th e
value of love.
Shakya mun i Buddh a ' 7
Also, to culti vate boundless lo ve and compassion doesn' t just har-

mo ni ze th e mind with its infin ite nature. W hen th e nature of mind

is recogni zed, boundless love and co mpassion become the natural
way to express it. Therefore, wisdom and love are integrated within
each meditatio n of th is book, so eac h may increasingly inform and

empowe r th e other. In this way, the spiritual path can unfold with
a I"isf sense of ease and naruralness and a lovillg se nse of commitm ent
to aU- th e so rt of qualities that Nyoshul Kh cnpo embo di ed in his

simple presence.
Nonconce prual Practice Supports All Other

Qualities on the Path
Wh en o nc rea li zes [this] natural state, th e tru e na turc of aU
bein gs, th ere is naturally a wellin g up of in co nceivabl e spo n-
tan eo us compassion, loving-kindn ess, co nsid erati o n and
empathy, beca use one realizes th ere is no self separate from
others .. .. Everywh ere that suffering and delusion arise, com-
passio n ari ses to release and alleviate bein gs sufferin g fro m
that d el usio n. That is the spontaneous o utflow of th e gen-
ui ne rea li zati o n of the tm e nature.
Nyoshul Kh en R inpoc hc 1"
In Slim , we have struggled so long-reacti ng to so much o f o ur

experience o f self and world through self- graspin g an xiety and ave r-
sio n . W e have identifi ed w ith those thought pattern s so mu ch that
they j ust appear to be w hat wc all arc. And we may never notice,
until it is po inted o ut and m ade vivid in non conceptualm cditation ,
th e extent to w hich w e were reactin g to our own t:. . brica ti o ns of
self and o th ers all alon g. Through non con ceptual meditati o n, w e
start CO sense th e vast nature of goodness th at had been hidden by
o ur ego-clinging. And we sense that this is equall y tru e for all th e
ochers around us. T oge th er we have been lost from o ur tru e nature
and toge th er have suffered fo r it. Fro m thi s recogniti o n fl ows

tremendo us lovi ng compassion fo r all beings eq ually.
Some T ibetan Buddhist teachers do not give specific, han ds-on
instructi o n fo r noncon ceptual wisdo m practice un til th eir students

have done a grea t many preliminary p racti ces of devo tio n, love. and
mental purification . This is so studen ts ca ll firs t develop th e spiri tual
Leltillg Be ~ 67
power (merit) that is needed to engage nonco nceptual wisdom. Such

an approach works well for some students, but for oth ers it ca n make
th e path seem like an endless proliferation of conceptual practices,
reducing "cnlighrcJUllent" in their minds to a distant, see.mingly unat-
tainable goa l. Then some of them become discouraged and give up.
O th er teachers give instm cti on in nonconceptual wisdom prac-
ti ce ea rly on, so that all oth er practices of love and reve rence ca n
fl ow more naturally from that practice, as in Kh enpo's qu ote above.
Love, compassion, and devotion unfold more easily w hen th ey are
informed by nonconceptual wisdom. And when informed eve n a
little by such wisdom , th ey unleas h far more spiritual power for th e
path. For thi s reason, following my own root teachers, I have intro-
duced nonconceptual prac tice here early on.
Further Guidance for Buddhists and Non-Buddhists

The prac ti ces of thi s chapter are deceptively simple yet quite pro-
found. With good guidance and mu ch practice, over tim e they ca n
ac cually Icad to th e heart of enlightenment, th e no ndual rcali zati on
of emptin ess and co mpassion, buddha mind, dharmakaya.
Non co nceprual awareness ca n only communicJ te itself through
thos e w ho abide in such awaren ess, accomplished ma sters such as
those refe rred to in this book. So, if th e practices of thi s chapte r

igni te yo ur imcrest to plumb thcm to th eir depth , you wi ll need to
seek out a tcac her w ho has deep knowledge of them , attained from
lon g practice w ith his or her ow n teachers. Such Buddhist teachers
tran smit a di versi ty of practices to strengthen conce ntratio n, cut

thro ugh subco nscious pa tterns of clinging, bring out capacities of
compassion and devmion , and point th e student to th e mind 's infi -
nite nat ure. Such teac hers can help indi vidua l stude nts, in their
uniqu eness, draw upon the vast resources of Buddhist traditions so
JS to progress in th e most effective ways.
Whe n you read spiritual books or meet spiritual teache rs who

speak deeply to your own life, find o ut with whom they trained and
how th ey train ed, and you can start to discern yo ur own connec-
ti o ns to th e practice traditions that call to yo U .I ~
Non -Buddhist meditators among yo u arc in vited to explore the
practi ces in this book to see how th ey empower your own process
of spiritual learning. Let your experience of each meditation in this
book point yo u to passages in your sacred texts to discove r w hat
th ey may furth er revea l. Let meditation experience shin e new li ght
lipan the central tenets, practices, and ethics of your own traditio n
and upo n all f.1cets of your life.
God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and

God abides in him.
First Letter ofJohn 4: 16.
3. Letting It Out:
Unleashing Love's Power
Your Own Fulfillment Comes Through Love for Others

As th e great eighth-ce ntu ry Buddhist master Shantid cva wro te:
All w ho find happiness in chis world have done so by wish-

ing for the happiness of many o thers. All w ho find unhappi-
ness in this world have done so by aim in gj ust for th ei f ow n
happiness. 20
At fi rst glance, th is state ment may see m surprising. Ie co ntradicts the

assum ption, so prevalent in modern society, dut if we foclIsed our
~\Ctenti on on the happin ess of o thers we would sac rifice our own.
Shamidcva cla ims that to foclIs on others' happin ess is th e cause of
O Ut ow n ! But if he's ri ght, how could society have gareen it so
wro ng?
As earli er m ention ed, o ur stream of th ought has been working [0
create an impress ion of an isolated "self," set apart from aU others,
whi ch appears real, substantial, and th ereby seemin gly safe. Although
we have all believed such th oughts of "self" as so methin g isolated

fro m and over against ochers, those thoughts were always mistaken.
We have never existed in tha t way. Therefore, we can never
become happy or fulfi ll ed by pre tendin g to exist in that way.

Rath er, we always existed in much deeper relationship to all others,
w ho in thei r innate na[lJre of goodn ess and their self-ce ntered habits
of th ought are like alternative versions of ourselves. Tlw( is th e real-

ity of our existence.
As our spirimal prac ti ce increasin gly shows us o ur underlyin g
connection to all others , we begin to realize th at our practi ce, and
indeed our life, was never meant just for ourselves. Its pu rpose aU
along has bee n to awaken to our full est potential fo r th e sa ke of all.
And we learn , gra tefully, to take up that responsibili ty.
Getting Real: The BHddha~ Tea{hing of Ka rma

It is our inner nature , buddha nature, that recognizes the reality of
our conn ecti on to alL It al so possesses a vast capacity of o penn ess,
love, and com passio n that mirrors this reality. W hen we are gen-
uinely loving, kind, respectful , and generous to others, we express
th at in nate na[l1re and th ereby evoke our ow n potenti al for well-
bein g and happiness. By doing so, we also evoke others' potenti al fo r
kindness and well-being. W hen we try to fin d happiness thro ugh
selfish actio ns th at are possessive, callous, or hateful o f others, we
fall away from our innate nature of loving openness and thereby
create causes for stru ggle, suffering, and anguish in our minds. By
doi ng so, w e also evoke others' tendencic:s toward self-cente redness
an d hatred. This is th e Buddha's teaching of b mla: O ur wise, lov-
in g actions of mind and body empower our inner potential to be
well and happy and tri gge r others' po te ntial fo r goo dn ess. O ur
deluded, se lfish actions of mind and body do th e o pposite.
Karma-Prior Acrions Affect Present Experience

D;st;llguishi/~ the lllllt'r CQlIses oj Ollr Feelillgs

1r011l th, Exu",al Triggers
Modern societies promote th e idea th at to acqui re nice thin gs and

pleasant co m pa nions is w hat brings happiness. Ad ve rtise m ents
reinforce that impress ion: the ri ght drin ks, the right ca r, the right
Lmillg It Ollt ~ 7'
companions are the ticket to a happy life. Believing that, some peo-
ple devote their lives almost entirely to the acquisition of such things
and to the endeavor to protect and keep th em. What th e advertise-
ments don 't show is how unhappy, even desperate, such people tend
to become ove r th e course of their lives.
As th e Buddha caught, happin ess comes from actuali zin g our
inner nature ofl ove, compass ion, and wisdom. Unhappin ess co mes
from self- centered thought and action chat ali e nate us frol11 that
nature. People and thin gs ca n trigger feelings of happi ness in us, but
they arc not the velY source of those feelings. They can trigger feel-
in gs of unhappin ess in us, but they are not the very source of those
feelin gs. It is critically important to understand that di stin ction for
us to further access Shantideva's meaning.
Pay ing Attention to the Karmic Structure oj Experience

Whcn someo ne says or do es something that upsets us, we com-
monly say: " H e hurt me." Implicit in such a statem ent is th e
assum pti on that th e other person pllt the feeling of " hurt" in to LIS,
th e mcntal pain that we feel , which is why we get angry about it.
But could that ass umption be w rong?
For example, Susan gets angry with her co-worker Jim and snarls
at him , " The presentation you just gave is stupid. " Jim fe els hu rt
and angry in return. H e tells others, "What Susan said really hurt
me," as if her action had inserted his hurt, hi s mental pain , into hil11 .
He fc;:e1s justified hating her for that and expects others to sy mpa-
thize. The ass umption that Susan hurt him is sociall y reinforced
through gossip: "Susan hurtJlIll. I don'tb lam c him for hating her. "
But did Susan actually insert Jim 's hurt into him, as the gossip
implies? No. Then w here did Jim 's hurt come from?
Jim 's interpretation of Susan 's action tri ggered his feelin g ofme n-
tal pain. Somethin g in Jim 's mind unders tood that actions like
SU5<1n'S often intend haml. That mental recognition helped elicit his
feeling of pain. According to the Buddha's reachin g of karmi c

action and res ult, like th e rcs t of us, Jim has done actio ns intendin g
haml. In this case, he has don e actions analogous to what Susan did
toward him. Bur in th e moment of Susan 's criticism, he does n' t
remember his ow n past actions. When Susa n critici zes him, th en
jim 's subconscious mind knows wha t it mc:ms to inccnd harm by
such words, since he meant to harm oth ers with words similarl y in
the past. So his mind takes the words personally and feels th e hurt
it is predisposed to fee l. That unhappy feeling is th e result ofJim 's
own karma, his own past harmful action, and the imprints it placed
on hi s mind. The " hurt" comes from lIIi,hill his mind. Susan 's actio n
is j ust th e ex temal conditio n that helped to tri gge r it.
T ry this thought experiment. R emember a time when someone
said somethin g negative to you and you felt hurt, becoming an gry.
Take a moment to recall that vividly now. Doesn't it see m as though
th ey pill the feelin g of hurt into you by their words, so you became
angry? But th e other's action didn't actuall y put that mental feeling
into yo u, did it? Somehow, your understanding of their action
evok edfrolll witllill YOIl what your own mind was prepared to feel.
Our ow n past negative actions prepare our minds to interpret oth-
ers' actions in a personal way that makes us feci hurt.
T he sam e principle applies in the opposite situation . If so meone
hasn't done a specific kind of negativt: action , they tend not to tak e
it personall y wh en others do it, and so th ey don 't have feelings of
hurt welling up inside. Beryl, my wife's mother, is a deeply lo ving
person. I' ve noticed that if someone acts in a way that would gener-
ally be co nsidered rude, she tends not to be upset by it. For exam -
ple, if a man callously pushes ahead of her in line at a cafeteria, instead
of getting angry , Beryl might wonder if the man is o kay. " Perhaps
he has low blood sugar and needs to get food quickly," she mi ght say.
rf someone else sugges ts that he's simpl y rude , Beryl will express
compassion for him , perhaps saying, " H ow diffi cult it mu st be to go
Lm illg It Ollt ~ 73
through life in such a msh. " In Buddhist terms, because she has not
been rude to others, Beryl has no inner experience of what it's like
to callously push ochers aside. So she tends not to take others' rude
actions perso nally enough to feel the hurt and anger that many of us
would feel in a similar situation (though pres umably, as a human
bein g, she would feel hurt by other typ es of negative action). In addi-
tio n, her love and compassion fo r whomever she meets are strong.
Since love and compassion are inner causes of joy, she tends to be
joyful in ge neral , even in situations that others find diffi cul t.
So, in the prior example, Susan's criti cism was not rhe very source
ofJim 's feeling of hurt. R ather, hi s inner tendency to feci person-
all y hurt was triggered by her criti cism. Like Jim, we don ' t notice th at
our pain comes from within, as the fruition of our own harmful pas t
action s that we don' t presently recall. In such situations, it appears
as if the oth er person is th e sole sou rce of our " hurt," our mental
pain, not merely th e external tri gger of it. So it feels natural to reac t
self- ri ghteously with anger in return . But this furth er reinforces th e
tendency for us to feel hurt in th e future when others ac t with anger
toward us; th e n we react once again with an ger, on and o n. T hu s
the karmic pattern gets etched deeper and deeper in endless mutual
reaction.
Furthermore , in th e moment of Susan 's re mark , Jim saw her as
hateful , whi ch is another reason he beca me angry. That's becaus e he

is f..Lmi liar with the loo k of hate from tim es in the past w hen he
hated others. Susan se rved as a mirror for Jim's own hateful face. By
reactin g to he r with anger and hatred, he wa s reacting to part of
himself
In tlus way, we evoke th e worst from each other even while
blaming eac h ocher as th e sole calise of the problem . As we ration-
alize o ur hatred in discussions with others , it arrains social sa nction,

making th e false constructi on of hurt and hate seem real: "Susan
hUf[Jim . I don 't blame him for hating her. "
Given this karmic analysis, is J im thcn [0 bc blamed for his angry

reaction to Susan? Tha t is not the point at all. Jim, Susan, and all of
the rest of us are kannically condi tioned in the ways d<.."Scribed. Since
befo re we ca n remember, we've been misrcac tin g to others as if
they were the very source of our feelings, without recognizing how
aUf feelings afe con nected to our own past actions. Who st:mds out-
side of thi s problem , in a position to blam e others for it? All are
GllIght in thi s problem, and all have contri buted to it. T o know that
is to have cOlI/passioll for all, not to seek someo ne [0 blame for it. As
several of my students at Boston College have poimed out , Jesus
expressed thi s kind of dynamic beautifully:
Do not judge, so that yo u may not be judged. For with the

judgme nt yo u mak e you will be judged, and the meas ure
you give will be th e meas ure you get. Why do you see the
speck in yo ur neighbor's eye, but do not notice th e log in
your own eye??!
Ethllic Prejudice alld Hatred

Ethnic prej udice and hatred are further elaborations of this karmic
stru cture. People learn to experience others, all grouped togeth er,
as tri gge rs for their own mental pain. By passin g on th e stori es of a
hateful and violent past, those who belong to one gro up learn to
associate pain with any sight or thou ght of the other group. All the
w hile, th ey consider the other group as the very so urc e of their
pain-as thorou ghly evil-but with no awareness of th e role of their
own past actions in all th ey experi ence. So it feels natural , as a group,

to hate a w hole other group as intrinsically evil and to react to them
accordin gly. In doing so, they evoke th e sa me kind of response in
return, perpetuating an endless cycle of mutual hate and violence.

Lmillg It Ollt ~ 75
Positive Karma
The Budd ha also taught about the opposite karmi c dynamic. W hen
othe rs arc kind and loving. their actions can tri gger our happiness.
For exa mple, Bonnie listens with loving attentio n and concern to
R ob . Later R ob thinks, "Bonnie makes me so happy," as if Bonn ie
were the very source of hi s happiness. But if Rob didn 't ha ve the
inn er capacity to be happy at that mom ent, ifhe were sufferin g from
seve re depress ion for exa mple, nothing Bonn ie s3 id would have
mad e hil11 happy. Her kind action triggered th e happy feeling that
Itob's mind was prepared to feel.
Rob had done si milar kind actions for others in th e past, actions
motiva ted by hi s wish for th e other's well- bein g. Beca use those
actions expressed his innate nature of lo ve and co mpassion, they
strengthened his inner capacity to be well and h3PPY. Bonnie's kind-
ness helped trigger that capacity in Rob's mind, so he felt happy. In
addition, through her lovi ng attention, Bonni e mirrored Rob's own
goodness back at him, including his own prio r ex periences of being
kind to others. So w hen Rob felt her kindn ess, he co uld recognize
it and naturall y respo nd with appreciation and love. In thi s way,
others can also evo ke the best from us. n
The Da/lger oj Possessiveness

In light of th e human tendency to grasp on to thin gs, let's take this

exampl e furth er in our imagination . Rob is not 3ware of th e
Buddha's teaching of karma, so he thinks that Bonni e is the very
sOllrce of his happiness, not just the !r({!ger for it. This means he believes
his happi ness depends en tirely on her presence. So he begins insist-

ing she stay aro und him and pay exclusive attention to him. R o b
c311s th 3t his " love" for Bonnie, but it isjust possessiveness. C lin ging
ro her in that way, of course, tends to drive her away. When Bon-
nj e tries to avoid R ob, her actions trigger feelin gs of mcnt.:ll pain in
him . Again misL1king Bonme's actions as th e lIlai" calise of his own
feelings, Rob starts to hate Bonnie for " hurting" him an d berates
her. As she then avoids him even mo re, he feels more " hurt" by her
action and verbal abuse escalates into physical abuse.
All too often, as television news repo rts, possessiveness mistaken
for love turns into hatred, abuse, and violence. And becau se the
newscaster merely reports th e final , violent actions without theif
ca usa l hi story, many of us feact to such news w ith ullmiti gated dis-
gust for the abuser.
In thi s way, we hid e from o Ufselves th e fact that we have all bee n
implicated in the underlying problem. E very time we mistook oth-
ers for th e vel)' so urces of our happiness Of unh ap piness, and mis-
reacted to th em w ith possessiveness o r anger thro ugh th at delusion,
we have contributed to a world in which greed, hatred, and violence
are dai ly news.
As soon as we think that other persons are th e givers of o ur men-
tal pain , we are alread y caught in anger and hatred, no matter how
much we consider ourselves to be ni ce people. As soon as we think
th at others are the very givers of ou r mental happiness. we are
already cau ght in possessiveness, and are o n o ur way to violence of
thought or word, if not of body .
Sha/"ideva~ Ftl11dalllelltal Message

In sum, as Shantideva taught, happin ess and well-bein g flow from

our innate nature of loving compass ion and wisdom , thro ugh
actions of kindness, generosity, patience, respect, care , and consid-
eratio n for o th ers. Until we recognize this f.1ct, we Gm ' t find mu ch
happiness.
T o see k happiness from a self-centered point of view just creates
mo re ca uses for suffering, because we keep misuking ochers as [he
mai n ca use of o ur pleasan[ and unpleasa nt feeli ngs radler [han [he
mere [riggers for th em. Mistaking them in [his way, we ca n' t avoid
misreac[ing to [hem in possessive o r angry ways, thu s eliciting their
Lettitlg [ t 0111 ~ 77
equally deluded reactions, umil it feels as if w e are caught in an

endless s tru ggle. ~
T o experience the wo rld in this way is CO be caught in samsara.

T o be freed fro m samsara is to be freed fro m the self-ce ntered point
of view, the fu ndamental delusion, at the heart of the problem . T o
be freed from del usion is to awa ken to our tru e nature-buddh a
nature, th e grou nd of deep peace. T o be liberated into th at gro und
is to unl eash vast powers oflo ve and compassio n for all others w ho
are caught in th e same fundamental delusion.
Indeed, in o ur present condition, eac h instant that we fall Ollt of
love in conn ec ti on to all , we are already ill at ease in o ur minds,
because we' ve f..1 11en from o ur na tu re of all- inclusive o pe nness in
w hich dt·cp peace is fo und. W e simply can' t be well and joyful in
any sta ble way unti l we awaken to w hat w e really are, o ur tru e
nature, w here co ncem for self and other is undivided. T hat is Shan-
tideva's most fun da mencal poin t.
Th e Human Need to Realize Our Intimate Connectio n

to All Others
Nyoshul Kh en R inpoc he explains:

IThe
. great Tibetan masterl Milarepa sa ng, "When I am al o ne,
.
medi tatin g in th e mo untains, all th e Buddhas past, present,

and fu ture are wi th me. [M y own teac her] g uru Marpa is
always with l11e . All beings are here." W e are not practicing
for o ursel ves alo ne, since everybody is involved and included
in the grea t scope of o ur prayers and meditatio ns ... . The nat-
ural o utfl o w of so- call ed "solitary meditati on or prayer" is
spoln aneous benefi t fo r o th ers; it's li ke the rays of th e sun,

rays which sponca neollsly reach ou t. T his good heart, pure
heart, va st and open mind , is call ed in Tibetan scm karpo,
w hite mind. It means pure, vast and open heart. This is innate
bod hichitta. It is not so mething fo reign to u s. :!~
The path to enlightenment uncovers our hidde n relati o nship to

all o thers, revealing o ur " innate bodhichitta," o ur innate capacity
for all - inclusive care. W e are depend ent upo n innum erable beings
fo r all that we are and all that we will become th rough spiritual prac-
tice. All others are like ou rselves in th eir causes of sufferin g, th eir
w ish to be happy, and th eir potential for enli ghtenm ent. U ltimately,
all are undivided from us in th e nature of mind. As {he path reveals
o ur profoun d relati o n to all o the rs, it also reveals o ur co nn ectio n to
spiritual teac hers w ho preceded us in this awake nin g and have held
the way o pen fo r lIS . Because such vast rela tedness is give n in the
ve ry gro und of o ur being, o ur most basic need is to reali ze and
embody it in love and compassio n.
In o th er words , our deep human need is to ana in th e inner free-
dom that let~ LI S receive love in the very depth of our bei ng and to
exte nd love to all o thers in the very depth of their bei ng. Indeed,
that is part of w hat learning to become "enl ightened" means.
Acco rdin g to Buddhist traditions of T ibet and East Asia, the path
to enli ghtenm ent is not a qu est tha t issues in a solitary achi evemcm .
It is an intuiti ve awakenin g to one's implicit relatio n to all others.
This is expressed in th e doctri ne and iconography of buddhahood in

those cul tures. Complete enli ghtenm ent manifests not just as a fig-
ure in pri vate repose but as a lumino us embodimc:nt of all- pervasive
love, co mpassion, joy, and liberatin g ac ti vity, w ho spo ntaneo usly
comt11 unes th ro ugh those radian t q ualities with a vast array o f bod hi-
sattvas (be ings ma tu re in the path to enlighten ment). Fro m that
array, the luminous, li bera tin g powers of th ose qu ali ties extend to
beings in every directio n.2s

T his image of enlightenment as a holy rcalm of radiant, liberat-
ing ac tivity , blessing, and commu nio n is not a distant metaphysical
Lmillg It Ollt ~ 79
abstractio n. It communi cates the message that to awaken to our

ilUllost nature and freedom is to open our hearts and minds to all
others in loving compassion. Our capacity of universal love (buddha
nature), th e spiritual path that evokes its liberating power (bodhi-
sattva path), and th e ultimate realization of that path (buddhahood)
are of one pi ece.
Cooperating with the Primordial Power of Good

Within Us
Th ese understandings inform our practice. Meditati o ns of wisdom
and love are not for the purpose of remakin g isolated, inherently
sinful persons into something different. Rather, such meditati ons
uncover the ("l ct that w e are closely con nected [0 all others and that
o ur inherent nature, th e very essence of our minds, is always primor-
diall y good prior to self-centered thou ghts of "good" and "evil. "
A tremendous force oflo ve and w isdom has been hidd en within
us, obstru cted by momentary (but almost continuous) chains of ego-
clinging thoug ht and emotion. Energies oflovc and pure awaren ess
have been di storted by those tendencies into ou r self-centered,
delud ed emocions. Practices of wisdom and love from Buddhist tra-
dition s cut throu gh self- cenreredn ess and purify emotiol1al energies
into enlightened powers of insight and love that can inspire man y
others. W e tak e up ou r responsibility to self and others first by tak-
ing real meas ures to awaken that enlightened potential, as in the
meditatio n that follows.
As we ente r into th e meditation below, it is critical to remembe r

that we are not stru ggling to become something we are not. We are
learning cooperate with what we always were. W e enter into the
[0
meditation in that spirit-followin g the instruction s carefull y so as

to cooperate w ith the tremendous force of good within us that has
been waiting to emerge.
The medit.1 tio n below will extend the wish ofl ove firs t to dea r
ones, th en very widely. It repeats the basic content of prior medita-
ti ons and th en builds further upon th em. This se rv(.~ to deepen our
grounding in each pa rr of the practice as it continues to unfold. The
med ita tion has fo ur parts that can be done in abo ut thirty to forty
minutcs in da ily practice. Be sure to pa use aftcr e:lch demarc:lted sec-
ti on, to give yourscl ftim c to dwell on the instru ction :It hand.
M editation: Extending the Love We Receive

Part l : Rifuge-Receivilrg the Blessillg oj Ullcollditional Love
Sit in a relaxed way with back straight, eyes gently gazing

sli ghtly downward. R ecall you r bene6 ctors-those remel11-
bered frol11 your perso nal life and reve red spiritual beings
who exte nd th eir love to all. En vision their smiling f.1ces
before you. R ecall th em as sending you th e wish oflove, the
wish for your deepes t well- being, happin ess, and joy.
Imagine th eir wish as a soft, radia nt shower of healin g
blessin g. Bathe your whole body and mind in that radia nce,
all th e way down to your fi ngertips and toes. Receive its gen-
tle, healin g energy. Trusting this wish oflove more than lim-
iting tho ughts of you rself, receive it deepl y into your being.
Abso rb th e healin g radi ance of th eir wish for your happi-
ness into every cell of your body, every corner of yo ur mind.
Bath e in this; heal in thi s; rest in thi s.
After a little w hi le, j oin your benefactors in th eir wish for

you. W hile receivi ng their wish, mentall y repeat it fo r your-

self, " May this one havc dcepest well- bein g, happiness, and
joy." Affirm th e words repea tedly w hile accepting yo ur
Lmillg It Ollt ~ 81
benet:'lctors' love eve n more deeply into yo ur body and

mind, communin g with them through its radiance.
After a little w hile, drop the vislializ.,ltion and just relax into
oneness with th:H lovin g luminosity, releasin g all frames of
reference. Deeply let be into that ge ntle, luminous whol e-
ness beyo nd separation of self and others. Enjoy just bei ng-
at ease, at rest, compl ete.
Part 2: uttilrg Be ill Natural AwarfllfSS
Notice w here YO ll still feel any grasping in the body. Let that
gen tly release itself R elaxed and calmly alert, allow aUbod-
ily se nsa tions to settle naturally in th ei r own way. Let go of
any sense of control. Ju st surrender to the natural powe r o f
th e body, lettin g it embody you . Enjoy bodil y awa reness in
that way for a little while.
Now notice any grasping on to th e brea thin g process. Let it

rela x, all owing the breath to come under its own power.
Sense th e ge ntle shift from holding on to the breath to just

bein g brea th ed. Feel th e breath all th e way in , all th e way
Oll t, breathing you.
Notice any grasping within th e Inind on to the thinking

mechanism , identi fyin g wlth chains of th ought, grasping on
to them as frames of reference. Let that feeling of holding

on rel ease itself, so as to unwind deep inside. Let all the
th oughts and se nsatio ns si mply arise and dissolve under their
own po w er, in the ir own way. C ut th e " kite strin g" o n

tho ughts to let them fly freely, even as they arise.
In th is way, let th e mind unfurinaturall y, ofitsclf, and fall
totally o pen-at ease, unres tricted, free of any foc us or
directedness, three-hundred-sixty degrees all- pervasive, w ide
open. R aise th e gaze of your eyes to loo k gentl y ahead, tak-
in g all in at o nce, totally expansive. Let all be just as it is, in
complete openn ess and acceptance .
Se nse th e openn ess of awareness, infinite and with o ut ce nter,

in w hi ch all thou ghts and sensa tions self-arise and self- dis-
solvt."-be yo nd thinking, beyond reference point- bo und-
less o pe nn ess and translu cent awareness, pervasive like th e
sky. Let thi s vast expanse of fund amental awareness se nse all
that appears as its own radiant expression, like th e sky sens-
in g i t~ o w n ra inbows. R est as that sky-li ke na ture of mind-
all pheno mena permitted to self-a ri se and self- release within
th e infinite expanse of openness aware.
Part 3: Ex/eliding the Love w,; Receive

Let the soft energy of this fundamental awareness manifest by

envisio nin g your benefactors , now behind you and just
above . Open to their wish for you to ha ve dee pest well-
bein g, happiness, and joy. Accept the healin g rad iance of
th eir love into every part of your body and mind.

Whil e continuing to receive their radiant w ish, also jo in yo ur

beneL1ctors in th eir w ish for YOll , repea ting it for yourself,
" May this o ne have deepest well-bein g, happin ess, Jndj oy."
Lmillg It Ollt ~ 83
After a little w hile, think of someone very dear to you , for

w hom it feels natural to extend the wish ofl ove, such as a
close fri end , relati ve, or pet. Envision that being in front of
you . Wh ile co ntinuin g to receive your benef..1 ctors ' radiant
love from behind, now also let th e radiance come throu gh
yo u to th e dear one before you. As you do so, since rel y
affirm th e wish of love in your mind for that perso n: " May
this One have deepes t we ll- being, happiness, and j oy."
R epeatedly make that wish as the radiance comes through
you, bathin g him or her in its healing energy.
En vision before you a few more beings that are dear to yo u,

letting YO UT bcnc(1ctors ' radiance come through you to them.
R epeatedly affi ml the wish of love fo r th em in YO UT mind:
" May they have deepest well-bein g, happiness, and joy."
Envision 1110re bein gs that are dear to you in wi denin g cir-

cles at yo ur own pace, letting the radian ce come throu gh
yo u to th em wh ile repeating the wish. No matter how you

have thou ght differentl y of individuals, extend th e wish to
them all equally. TrllSt this wish more than any such limit-
in g thoughts. R epeating th e wish , let its radi ance illu min e
them all, from the depth of yo ur heart into the full depth of
thei r bein g: " May they have deepest well- being and joy.
through and through. "
As you continue to receive your benefac tors' w ish of love

fro m be hind, let its radiance come thro ugh in a mu ch vaster
way. Think that it extends to every bein g in all directions at
o nce: each l1l1man, animal, insect, worm, and all o th er sen-
ti ent beings wherever they may be. Sense yo ur heart as like
th e sun , radiatin g th e energy of thi s wi sh in all directions at
o nce, bo undl essly, infinitely. R epeatin g th e w ish, illumine
every b ein g w ith its healing energy: "May each being have
deepest well - bein g, happiness, and joy, every single one."
Finall y, drop the visualization and just rel ax into o neness

w ith that lo ving, insubstantial luminosity. Release all frames
of refere nce into boundless openn ess and transluce nt aware-
ness, pervas ive like the sky, beyond any tho ught of separa-
tio n. R est thus, at ease, wide open, co mplete.
Part 4: Dedicatillg the Spiritilai Powcr jo r All
Feel th e po wer of this practice to pull you beyond self-

bl'fasping pattern s of sufferin g and to open you toward th e
tranquillity, freedom , and goodn ess of your inmost bei ng.
Prayerfully dedi cate all such spiritual power to the deepest

well - bein g and liberation of all beings, each li ke you in need-
ing and wanting such joy and freedom.
Good w ork! Have a break.

Tips on Starting to Extend Love to Others

When you bega n to extend love, you were asked to think offi rst one,
th en a few beings that are dear to you , for whom it feels natural to
Lmillg It Ollt ~ 85
mak e the wish oflove. Be careful at this point to avoid inauthen-

tic choices. Don't foc us here on people you think yo u are sllpposed
to consider dear. Bring to mind those for whom it feels natural to
wish th eir happiness.
It is traditio nall y advised, when starting CO ex tend love, /tot to
focus first on people from w hom YOll expect lot'" of attention , appre-
ciation, and so fo rth in return. Otherwise your wish for thei r hap-
piness tends to get mi xed wi th your desire fo r th em to fu lfi ll yo ur
expectati ons. That is a form of possessiveness, not th e simple wish
of love th at we are lea rning to evoke. You can include such people
bter in your meditation, whe n you have more expericnce with th e
practice; not in the begi nnin g.
W hen yo u are identifying dear ones, if any of yo ur ben(.'faccors
come nJtllrall y co mind, you ca n envision them in boch places-in
th e fi eld of be nefaccors behind YO ll and in th e fi eld of dear ones
before YO ll . That is fin e.
The Thoroughness of the Love W e Cultivate

Notice how tllOroll,{!h is the wish of lo ve in this practice. W hen
receivin g love, we accept it into every part of our body and mind,
all the way dow n to our toes and fin gertips. Wh en extendin g it CO
others, we wish th em total well-being, radiatin g the wish into th eir

w hole bein g, top to bottom . Indeed, we may ncver have con-
sciously received or extended love in such a thoro ughgo ing way.
Much of th e power of th e practice comes from that thoroughness.
T o wish fo r th e compl ete we ll- being of oth ers is [Q spea k to thei r

inmost nature-the perfection, tranq uillity, and joy in th e very
nature of theic minds th at is pnor to all delusions arising frolll ego-
grasping. Their complete well-being call only be full y realized whe n

they become freed from delusion and grasping. Thus, ultim ately,
th e love we extend to oth ers wlshes th em a depth of peJce and j oy
that o nly beco mes acmalized as th ey th emsel ves awaken to th eir

own innate , enlightened potential. At its ultimate level of meanin g,
th en, o ur wish ofl ove is a wish for their fullest enl ightenm ent.
At the sam e time, in tllis practice, we also wish each being every
other kind of ge nuin e relief and happiness, no matter how small: a
cool breeze on a hot day, food wh en hun gry, healin g w hen sick,
consolati on w hen sad. In thi s way, our wish of love also motivates
specific acti ons to meet concrete needs. It prompts us to serve oth-
ers in manifold ways: to comfort someone in despair, to share our
resources with someone in need, to be present to som eone w ho
needs us.
This thoro ugh wish of love, w hi ch wills eve ry layer of well- being
for every person , is w hat very great spiritual bene t:'lc tors, such as
Shakyamun i Buddha, Shantideva, th e Dalai Lama, and Nyos hu l
Kh enpo have made for all b e in gs~in cl udin g eac h of us. Because
th ey have d one thi s and have practiced and taught from such an all-
inclusive and powe rful attitude, we find ou rsel ves with the chance
to do likewise. W e can join them in the same potent wish for all and
lea m increasingly to embody it, " tcanlin g up" with th em in enlight-
ened ac tivity for this world.
The spiritual power of other very great holy fi gures appears to
fUll cti on similarly. Jeslls, for example, inspires wi se C hristians to
pa rticipate in his active love and se rvice to the world, not on ly to

wors hip him . C hri stians ca n practice thi s meditation of love as a
mea ns to empower the if li ves as Christians. In th e meditation they
ca n envisio n C hrist as thei r fundamental benefactor :md co nsider
th c spiritual power unleas hed by the practice as th e powe r of God's

love, pulling th em beyond themselves w hile inco rpora ti ng th em
into God's lovin g activity and servi ce to th e world . Analogously,
J ews, Muslims. Hindus, and others can explore how th e medi tation
ofl ove may inform and empower th eir spi ritual lives in service to
others.
Lmillg It Ollt ~ 87
The only tm ejoy on earth is to escape from the prison of our

own false self, and enter by lo ve into union with the life who
dwells and sin gs within the essence of every creature and in
th e core of OUT own souls.
Thomas M erto n 2f'
May I be a li ght for those in need of light. May I be a bed

for those in need of rest. May I be a serva nt for those in need
of service, for all embodied beings.
Shantideva 27
The Vastness of the Love We Cultivate

Bes ides its thoroughness, notice how vast the scope oflove becomes
in th e final step of th e meditation , literall y extendin g to all bein gs.
Part o f the power of the practice comes from that vast scope, so vas t
it is beyond the comprehension of self~centered thought. It ope ns us
way up, stretching the mind past its narrow , e go~c entered fram es of
reference. Such boundless love helps harmonize us with the infinite,
s ky~li ke scope of the mind 's nature, the vast expanse of opelmess and
cognizan ce. It supports our practi ce of wisdom, by helpin g us rel ease
our fram es of reference and let be into what li es beyo nd th Clll. 2M
The Path of Elilightmlllmt ls the Openillg of the Milld
This innate buddha~natur e-th e fundamental enli ghtened

mind with in eac h of us-is like th e sky, w hich is un f..1 ilingly

vas t, pure, and unchanging. Wi thin this profound nature, the
quali ties of buddhahood arc like the rays of li ght that come
frol11 th e sun .... The difference between the impure mind

and the pure mind, the deluded mind and th e enli ghtened
mind, is mainly a difference of narrowness and openness. In
o ur present deluded sL1te, our mind is extremely narrow. For

example , we li ve [as in alo ne and rarely, if ever, consider the
infinity of sentient beings .... Conversely, the enlightened
Buddha is o ne w ho considers the infini ty of se nti ent
beings . . .. Thus the entire path- from an ordinary being to
buddha hood-is th e wadual opening of mind.
Nyoshul Khen 1l...inpoc hc 2<l
T he path of enli ghtenm ent releases th e mind frolll its constricted

self-grasping to the infinite openness of its basic nature, which is
pervaded by awareness and co mpassion like th e open sky is per-
vaded by th e rays of the sun. The path to enli ghtenment invo lves a
fundamental reo rientation, from identifying ourselves with the nar-
row, self-ce ntered, and shifting thoughts of th e mom ent to th e all-
inclusive, abid ing nature of enl ightened wisdom and love. This path
is th e opening of the mind to the vast expanse that in cl udes all phe-
nomena without discrimination and to the vast love that incl udes aU
beings without disc rimination.
Throu gh th e non conceptuai practice of wi sdom , ofletti ng all be
in th e sky-like nature of mind, we realize that w e are not isolated
from eac h other; we are not se t apart fro111 others within th e undi -
vided, cogni za nt grou nd of being. As this intu iti ve wi sdom dawns,
there is a profound se nse of whole ness, of o neness with ou r world

and its inhabitants, a natural intimacy with them all . All thought of
a brittle self, holding itself apart from the others, starts to collapse
into basic unity with the empty, cogni za nt ground of all .
Complementing th at nonconceptual w isdom practi ce, the co n-

ceptual practice boundlessly extending love enacts our implicit co n-
nection to all other beings, expressin g o ur solidarity w ith th em
through the will and energy that wis hes th em dee pest well-being
and happiness. Unbounded love prepares th e mind for unbounded
wisdom and ex presses th e dawning of that wisdom .
Lmillg It Ollt ~ 89
One of my most inspiring and profound teachers is C hokyi Nyima

Rinpoche, a lea rn ed abbot, lama, and Buddhist leader w ho li ves in
Nepal. Kinpoche is slight of build and short in seature. Yet, mysteri-
ollsly, when YOll meet him, there is something incredibly vast abollt
him. He is responsible for the ed ucation and support of hundreds of
monks and nuns and revered as spiritual guide to th ous:mds of other
Asians and Western ers. He has established a pioneerin g university
ce nter to explo re new ways to train students in an cient and modern
forms of Buddhist studies. He has initiated service projects in support
of Asian women and children. He has introduced new ways to apply
Buddhist practices to modem needs and has inspired many inno vators
w ho now lead th e way in bringing methods of th e East to th e West.
While physically small, he seems like a huge person in the vastness of
his presence, his perspective, his energy, and his sense of responsibiJ-
ity for th e world. When we train in the boundlessly vast scope oflove
and wisdom through meditation, it helps us apprecia te and under-
stand a person of sll ch vastness. Such practi ce inspires us not only to
admire o ur spiritual benefactors but to begin to emulate them.
The Very Life of Life

Nyoshul Kh enpo fiJnher discusses th e relationship between wisdom
and love in our practi ce:
If self- clinging and clinging to the reality of things remains

stro ng, how can th ere be any genuine Dzogchen, w hi ch is
th e tru e natural state of freedom , openness, and primordial

perfection? lfyo l! do bodhichitta practices [such as] loving-
kindn ess ... th ese practices may seem conceptual and rela-
rive , but they ac tuall y include the absolute tTll[h th at is [he

very nature of D zogc hen: vast openness, big mind, purity,
freedom , and no n-grasping.J()
The more we learn to let go of o urselves into th e sky- like nature

of pure awareness, the mo re its qualiti es ofl ove and compassion can
naturall y unfold. The more such enli ghtened qualities are pennitted
to unfold all- inclusively and unconditionally, the more we ca n let
go of o urselves into the all- inclusive, unconditio ned w isdom of the
mind 's na ture. Thus, Nyoshul Khenpo declares, tran scend ental wis-
dom and love are mutuall y empowering on th e path to enli ghten-
ment. Indeed. they Jre ultimately inse parable.
Th e meditation section s of this chap ter proceed in th at spirit and
in that o rder. We rest in natural awareness, a nonconceptual prac-
tice. Then we let th e intrin sic energy of that awa reness express itself
in the con ceptual practices of receiving and extendin g love. By
extending love in stages until it reaches all beings, its radiant energy
helps mel t away ordinal)' fram es of reference, penninin g us finall y
to release them and relax into non co nceptual abiding: " R.est thus,
at ease, compl ete." Finally, we dedicate th e kamlic meri t to full est
enli ghtenment for all beings.
When I was thirteen , my school required a course in religious
studies. Mr. Harri son , a teacher new to th e school, was assigned to
teac h it. And si nce I loathed religious study, I was prepared not to
likc hil11. But the first moment I saw him , I kncw thi s ye ar w ith
him wou ld be unu sual. Wh en he smil ed at hi s stud em s, he
appeared to mea n it- as if he we re actuall y delighted and ho nored

to be in our adol escent prese nce. H e taught reli gious and spiritual
them es in co nn ec tion wi th world evems, pro minentl y the Vi et-
nam wa r at a tim e w he n it w as little question ed and the civi l rights
move ment w hen it was viewed w ith hostil ity by man y America ns.
H e also ta ught a "sex ed ucation " component at a time w hen sex
was seldom di sc ussed with children. These were th e most " danger-
o us" areas o fformal study that I had ever encountered. But so me-
how, Mr. H arri son took us into profou nd lea rnin g w ithin every
subj ect. Part of it was hiS w illingness to qu esti on, with care and
Lmillg It Ollt ~ 9 '
kindn ess, into almost anything. BU[ it was hi s ca re and co mpas-

sio n for all th e people we studi ed, and hi s o bvious affection for
each studcnc, th at em powered us to join him in such co urageo us
inquiries. It felt as if he had more reverence and carc for each of
us than wc had for o urselves, naturally evoking my reve rence in
response-reverence for him , for my classmates, and for myself.
His class was grace filled.
At that point in my life, I thou ght that the people I adm ired for
th eir spontaneo us co mpassion, such as Mr. Harrison, were almost
a different species. Perhaps th ey were born with th at capacity, I
thought , but I could neve r be like that. Later in life, as I ex plored
the prac ti ces that my Buddhist teachers taught, it began to dawll on
me that w hat] had admired in others had been a facet of my own
nature all along, a facet that I hadn' t known how to bring au[. For
so meone like me to be given an effective way to bring o ut such
hidden ca pac ities seemed mira culous. It's like being shown the way
into th e very life of life, the very heart of your heart. To realize
that this is w hat your spiritual benefac tors and teachers arc open-
heartedly offe rin g to you , despite all your suspicions and worries,
is to feel tremend ous gratitude.
The reade r ma y read on through the book. But I reco mm end
that you practice th e meditation above daily for several weeks before
shifting to the meditation in the next chapter as yo ur main focus of

practIce.
"W hat About My Special Loved Ones?"

A question is often asked at trus point: " Isn' t there something unique
about my love for my family, my intimate fi-iends, or my pets? What
is that uniqu eness? Would it be lost within a practi ce like this, that
finall y exte nds love to all bei ngs equally?"
To clearly define the word love helps clarify th e answe r to this
qu estion. Love here means th e simple wish for someone to have

weU- being, happiness, and joy.
Our famili es, intimate friends , and pets are ve ry special recipients
for our love. Beca use of our uniquely close connection to them in
this life, they most powerfully evoke our capacity for openness, love,
and compassion . They help bring out our otherwi se hidd en pow-
ers of prese nce and care from the depth of our hearts. Importantly,
our fami ly members and close friends arc also the ones who most
vividl y reveal to us how much our possessiveness is mixed with our
love for them.
For examp le, before we have a specific practi ce oflove and wisdom
(li ke the meditations of these chapters), we may regularly wish mem-
bers of our f.1lnily happiness, bur that wish is often adulterated by our
desire for th em to behave in ways that meet our own desires and
expec tations. Without a specific spiritual practi ce, we may have no
clear means to distinguish that possessiveness, that self-centered atL1ch-
me nt, from the auth entic wish oflove. When we ha ve a daily prac-
tice of love and wisdom , over time, it helps us distinguish that
difference more clearly.
By and large, we tend not to notice how often we confuse our
desire to possess or control others-i n th e nam e of their well-
bein g- for ge nuin e love. A mother may long for her daughter to
have simila r interes ts, to take a particular career directi o n, or to

develop th e sam e kind of sexual identity, and so forth. But auth en-
tic love for a child is an enduring wish for her happiness no matter
how thlt may best unfold for her- whether that way fulfi lls th e par-
ent's own perceived needs or not. As the wisdom from daily prac-
ti ce increasingly distinguishes that differc: nce, it empowe rs our
auth entic love in t:l mily Ijfe while disempowerin g our possessiveness
and the pro blems it causes.

Learning to extend the wish oflove CO all bein gs fu rther informs
this process. By openin g the mind way past its prior parameters of
Lm illg It Ollt ~ 93
self-conce rn , such practi ce shows us the poss ibili ty of extendi ng

authentic love without having to possess or con trol its recipients.
As we become f.1miliar with this practice oflo ve and wisdom over
time , famil y life and fri end ships are positively tra nsform ed. T he
power to transform our lives is enhanced by participating in medita-
tion retreats and work shops with others long experi enced in such
practi ces. The n, as th e natural outflow of prac ti ce, f..1m ily life and
friendshi ps can begin to tran sform into another ki nd of " retreat."
From breakt1 st to bedtim e, each mom ent of interactio n can be taken
into o ur learning to be more present, lovin g, unconditional, to actu-
:lil y be th ere for partners , children, or friends :lS th ey describe th eir
workday, tell you th eir concern s, share a silly joke, or show you th eir
homework. To be more present to family or friends, more deeply lis-
tenin g at such mom ents, brings th em j oy, which brings joy to you
for learn ing better to be the person YO ll had intended to be.
However, our family and close fri ends are certainly not different
from o thers in the ir most basic condition: the ir mind's nature of
cogniza nce and emptiness, their innate goodness, their self- centered
tendencies of thou ght and reaction, th eir deep need for love. They
became dear to us through special bonds ofthis life and by our con-
sequ ent vision of goodness in them. But our practi ce also reveals
our hidd en bonds to all others, all of w hom also hold th e promise
of th eir innate good ness.

So, indeed our family, close fri ends, and pets remain th e special
emissa ri es of lo ve for us in this life-the ones who most intimately
evoke and support our learni ng of auth entic love and wisdom. And
as we learn to extend love to all o th ers in meditatio n, it doesn ' t

endanger the uniqueness of our love for f.1nlll y and friends. It puri-
fi es and revi vifies i[, even as it increasin gly reveals all th e others as
our wider " f..1mily."

4. Loving Beyond Boundaries
Love Must Be Boundless to Express Wh at W e Are
M,y , II bein gs be h, ppy. M,y they live in " Cety ,nd joy .. . . A,
" mo th er watches over her child, willin g to risk her own life
to protect her o nly child, so with a boundless heart ... cherish
all living beings, suffusing the w hole wo rld w ith unobstructed
lovin g kin d ness .... During aU your wa kin g ho urs, may YO LI
remai n mindful ohhis h eart and trus way ofli ving that is the
best in the world .
Shakyamuni Buddhal '
In o tl r prev io us m editation, we began to extend love in a vast way,

litel.l.ll y to all bein gs. This is in evitable, because ulti mately th e exten-
sio n of bo un dless love is a natural expression of wh at we truly arc.
W e are all intercolln ected. Our innate goodn ess can o nl y manifest in
dependence 0 11 many o ther beings-those that send LI S love, those
that evoke ou r love, and those that provoke o ur ego reactio ns (which
shows us mo re of o urselves so we can grow w iser). In 3ddition, other
perso ns 3re essentially o ther versio ns o f ourselves. O ur fund311lenral

condition is th e sam e: buddha nature, pure awa reness, narrowed into
ego-centered emotions and sufferings. As practice progressively
un covers o ur d eep connection to all others, th erefore, it feels increas-

in gly natural (Q wish th em all the sam e well-being we would w ish
fo r o urselves.
O ur love must ultimately extend to all beings fo r ano th er reason

as well : o ur innate capaci ties of w isdom and love are actually that
vast. W hen we let be deeply into natural awareness, th e vast scope
of o ur innate w isdo m can reveal itself as the bo und less exp:lIlse of
openness awa re. Then as o ur w ish ofl ove ex tends itself w idely to
others, it unl eas hes a correspondingly bo undless cap:lcity of love
previously h idden in o ur minds. To reali ze th e freedo m and j oy o f
comin g ho m e to wh at we truly are, w e must let o ur vast po tenti al
of love and wi sdom emerge. That is th e path to enl ightenm ent- th e
uncove rin g of our inmos t being.
Sensing the Fundamental Goodness of All

When we rece ive the wish oflo ve, the wish for o ur happiness, we
are instru cted to trust that w ish more than any limiti ng th o ughts of
o urselves. Wh en we ex tend th e sa me w ish to o th ers, we lea rn to
trust it mo re than o ur limiting thoughts of them . As in the Buddha's
qu o te above, the quali ty of this love is like th at of a devoted mo th er
fo r her child. N o matter what the child thinks, does, or is drive n to
do, th e mo th er senses the child's fundamcntal good ness and reflecl<;
that goodness back at him.
Similarl y, we are learning to wish oth ers well-being and happiness
un co nditi onally and to sense th eir underl ying goodn ess, no matter
who th ey think th ey are or what th ey think they are doin g. This tak es
us beyond our usual limitations, to extend th e wish of love more
inclusively and enduringly than we nl.l y have previo usly tho ught pos-
sible. T o extend love ultimately to a1.1 bein gs gives us a glimpse into
th e vast cap:lcity ofl ove that was hidden in o ur bei ng all alo ng.
Progressillgfrom a Glimpse of Ol/r Pottlltial to AlII/alizatioll of It

During peri ods of q ui et meditation, we may get the impressio n that

Sti ch a gl impse means we have reached a st:lblc realiz.1tio n of bo und-
less, ullconditi onallo ve. But it is just a glimpse in to o ur poteurial, not
Louitlg Bcyotld BO/llI(larics ~ 97
ye t a stable reali zation of such love. This becomes obvious in our

daily li ves when we notice how often- in our thoughts, emotions,
and actions-we continu e to react to others in less than lovin g ways.
It has bee n o ur habit to pay L1f more attention to our own self-
concerned thollghts about other pcrsons than to th e pnsolls them-
sel ves (as in th e b st chapter's exampl es of Susan and Jim, Bonni e
and Rob). The previous meditation starts to evoke o ur potential to
love beings beyo nd our ego- centered thoughts about them. But we
need to go furth er. Our practice also needs (Q show us how ou r
own thoughts have obstructed our potential for love, so we ca n cut
through th eir obstruction and more fully release our potentia l.
We wi ll use th e meditation introduced in thi s chapte r (Q co n-
sciously extend our wish of love to beings w ho have 1101 been dear
to us-s trangers and those we dislike or hate. The ego is not used
to doing that, so it typically reacts against it. In this way, our thought
of others as merely "strangers," "enemies," or " my friends" becomes
vividly displayed . W e ca n actually see how our belief in those redu c-
ti ve labels has limited o ur potential for love and wisdom. Once that
is seen, we can lea rn how to cut throu gh those pattern s of th o ught
and belief so as to let the will and encrgy of our love flow f.l r more
freely and enduringly.
In th e meditation th at follows, we are instructed to extend th e
wish oflove past our usual ego boundaries-first to strangers, then

to those we dislike. "Strangers" here refers to beinb1S we don 't per-
so nally know, whom we neither love nor hate since we don't think
we know them enough to carc. Notice how man y strangers th ere
are-billions of humans of the past and prese nt, billio ns of animals

and insects. In co mparison, the number of beings we consider our
" fri ends" is minuscul e.
"Those we di slike" are all beings toward whom we feel aversion,

hatred, or fcar, no matter how mild o r strong thi s aversion Illay be.
For th e purpose of thi s meditation, it is important to look beyon d
o ur o bvio us adversaries to th e vast maj o rity of " disliked o nes"

toward w hom we feel a subtl e or subconscio us ave rsion. For
exampl e, think of someone you m ay not consciously hate but
w hom you wi sh to avoid when you see him comi ng. That cou nts
as someon e yo u dislike for thi s practice. Or think of th e ave rsion
or fear th at ma y ari se in your mind wh en you encounter a person
ofa ra ce or ethni c group that's had tensions w ith your OWI1 , COI11-
ing down th e stree t in yo ur direction on a dark night. Or think of

a po litical figure or group that you and yo ur fri ends routinely den-
igrate as "obviously" immoral or stupid. These are exa mpl es of
beings we di slike-eve n just a li ttl e or just for a mome ntin our
typ ical day.
The following meditation can be done in about forty minutes as
daily practice. Pause for a little wh ile after eac h demarcated section
to dwell o n th e meditation instru ction.
M editation: Self-Transcending Love

Part I: Rej"ge-Receiving the Blessing of Unconditional Love
Sit in a relaxed way. R ecall your benefa ctors and envision

their smilin g ("Ic es before you. Recall them as se ndin g you
the wish of love, the wish for yo u CO have dee pest w ell-
being, happin ess, and JOY.
Bathe in the healing ene rgy of that wish, accepting it in to
eve!), part of your body and mind. To tru st thi s wish oflove,
th e goodn ess it comes from , and th e good ness it mee ts in

your heart-to trust it more than limiting thoughts of your-
self-- is to find real refuge. R eceive its heal ing radian ce deep
into your being, from head to toe.

Louitlg Bcyotld BO/llI(larics ~ 99
After a little w hile, join your benefactors in their wish for

you. R epeat the wish fo r yourself while accepting their ra di-
ant love even more dee ply into mind and body: " May this
one have d eepest we ll- bein g, h3ppin ess, and joy." Com-
mun e with them throu gh th at radian ce.
Afrer some time, drop th e visualization and just relax in[O

oneness with that lovin g luminosity, rel easin g all fram es of
reference. Deepl y let be into that gen tl e, lum inous w hole-
ness beyond se paration of self and orhers. Enjoy JUSt being-
at ease, at res t, co mpl ete.
Part 2: T..tttiltg Be ill Natural Awartlltss
Notice an y graspin g in th e body. Let that gend y release itself.

Let all bodily sensations settle naturally in thei r own way.
Surrend er to the natural power of the body, feeli ng it
embody you .
Let th e breath come under its own power. Feel the brea th all
the way in , all th e way out, breathing YO ll.
After a little whil e, noti ce any grasp ing to the thinking

mechanism , any clinging to thought chai ns as fram es of ref-
erence. Let th at mental grasping release itself, and just per-

mit th ough ts and sensa tions to arise and di ssolve under their
own power. In thi s way let the mind unfurl and L111 totally
100 ~ Awakellillg Tllrollgll Love
ope n-at ease, unrestricted, free of focus, all-pervasive, wi th

the gaze of yo ur eyes gentle and totally expansive. Let all be
j ust as it is in compl ete openn ess and acceptance.
Sense the openn ess of :J.wareness, infinite and without center,

in which thoughts and sensations self-arise and self- dissolve-
beyond thinkin g, beyond reference point- boundless open-
ness and translu cent awareness, pervasive like th e sky. Let this
vast expanse sense all that arises as its own radiant expression.
R est as that sky- like nature of mind-all phenomena permit-
ted to self-arise and self- release within th e infinite expanse of
openness a ware.
Part J: Ex tmding Love Past Accustomed Boundaries
After some time, recall your bene(1 ctors and o pen to th ei r

wish for you to have deepest well-bein g, happin ess, and joy.
Envision them thjs time behind you and j ust above. Accept
th e healing radi ance of their love into every part of your body
and mind. Join th em in th ei r wish for yo u, repea tin g it for
yourself, "May this one have deepest well- bein g, happi ness,
and joy."
After a little whil e, envision before yo u a few bein gs who

are especially dear to yo u. While receivin g your benefactors'

radiant wish from behind, let the radiance come through you
to those dear ones before you, and mak e the wish of love
for th em : " May they have deepest well- bein g, happin ess,
and joy." Affirn1 cha t wish repeacedly w hile lettin g the radi-
ance co me through you, baching th em in its healin g energy.
uwillg Beyolld Boulldaries ."¥- 10 1
At yo ur own pace, increase the number of dear ones you

envisio n before you in widening circles, ex tendi ng the radi-
ant wish of love to them all equally. Trust that wish more
than any limiting thoughts of them.
Envision now also before you a strange r, so meo ne yo u have

seen or heard of but don't really know. Let th e radi ance
come through you to that person w hil e mentally repea tin g
the wish ofl ove for him or her: "May this one have deepest
happiness, we ll- bein g, and joy." Trust this wish more than
your th ought of th e person as "stranger." As you repeat th e
wish, bathe the perso n with its radiance through and
throu gh.
Envision more strangers. Let the radiance come through yo u

CO th em while repeating the wish. Extend the wish CO them
equa lly, tru stin g it more than th e thou ght of th em as
"strangers." Just like you, these beings need and want deep
well- being and happiness. Bathe th em with th e radian ce of
love, throu gh and throu gh. To trust this wish oflovc morc
than yo ur ow n limi tin g thoughts of self and others is to find

rea l refuge .
Envision now someone w hom YO ll have disliked a little. Let

the radiance come through you to that person w hile repea t-
ing th e wish of love fo r h1l11 or her. Try tntsting that wis h

more than your thou ght of the person as di sli kable. Just like
yo u, this person needs and wants well-bein g and happiness
but is ofce n ca ught, like yo u, in self-centered reactio ns.
R epea ting the w ish, bathe the person w ith its rad iance
through and through.
Tty extending the w ish to o thers w ho m YO ll have disliked,

feared, or hated. No matter who they thi nk they are or how
you have thought of th em , ex tend th e wish to them , trust-
in g it mo re than those limiting tho ughts. Uath e them w ith its
radiance thro ugh and through.
Contilluin g to receive your benefactors' radiant love fro m

be hin d, now let its radiance co me thro ugh yo u in a mu ch
vaste r way. Think that it extends to eve ry being in every
direc tio n. Sense your heart as like th e sun , rad iatin g th e
powe r of this w ish in all directio ns at o nce, bo un dlessly.
R cpeating the wish, bathe every bei ng in its cnergy: "May
every bein g have dee pest happiness, we ll- being, and j o y,
every single o ne."
Fin all y, dro p the visuali zation and just rela x in to o neness
w ith th at lo vin g, insubstantial luminosity. Release all frames
of refere nce into bo undl ess openn ess and transluce nt awa re-
ness, pe rvasive like th e sky, beyond any th o ught of separa -
tioll. Rest thus, at ease, wide open, compiNe.
Part 4: Dedicatillg the Spiritual Power for All

Feel the powe r of thi s pract ice to pull you beyo nd self-
graspin g pattern s of suffe ring and to open yo u toward th e
tranq uilli ty. freedom , and goodness of yo ur inmost bein g.
PrayerfuIJ y dedicate all sli ch spiritual power to the deepest
uwillg Beyolld Boulldaries ."¥- 103
we U-being and liberation of all beings, each like you in need-

ing and wan tin g such joy and freedom.
Good work! Have a break.
Becoming Consciolls of Our Map of Samsara

This meditation ca n become a profoundly liberating practice. But at
first, most of us have diffi culty setting aside our cus[Qmary reactions
[Q strangers and enemies-o r even different levels of dear ones-so
:is to wi sh them all happin ess equall y. It feels fin e to make that wish
for a few beloved ones but not for aU th e oth ers. That's beca use th is
medit:ltion shows lIS the subconscious structure of thought that had
inhibited our potential for love.
A Mistak", [lIIpr",ioll of Self

The practice of wisdom shines light on how our structure of thought
inhibits this potential. R ecall the wisdom-oriented inquiries of chap-
ter 2. As w e inquire into rhe arising and dissolving of experi ences
and into the shape, location, and subj ect of awareness, 110 substan-
ti al entity within experience can be found . All th at is found is cog-
nizant emptin ess, {Otal openness beyo nd conceptualizing-like th e
empty sky pervaded by sunlight, beyond divi sion.

But, as Buddhist masters have ta ught, our self- clinging minds are
intoleran t of that boundless nature. A subconscious move ment of
anxiety and mcntal grasping tries to fi ll the insubstantial ope nn ess of
experience with a narrow, concrete sense of self. In that way, our

minds try to feel protected from the vast mystery of experience as it
is. Our chains of th ought work hard to interpret each situation so as

{O make our narrow, evanescent, thought-constructed sense of self
fcellike a co ncre[e, substantial, and invioia[c thin g. Thou gh[ appro-
priately pattern s our experi ence into an organi zed perso nality
through labels like " I" and " me," but th ere is no unchangi ng, sub-
stantial self to be found there of the sort that our minds keep work-
ing to eSL1blish . Our meditations increasin gly reveal rhis simple truth.
Mistaken ll11prcssiol1s oj Others

That ego m echanism is also what makes it so chall engl ng to love
others just as they arc and to extend love to th em all . For, as the
mind creates such a narrow and mistak en se nse of self, it creates cor-
respondin gly narrow ;md mistak en impressions of all the others.
Those w ho make our sense of self feel substantial, real, and good
at an y particular moment trigger feelings of happin ess in us. They are
grasped as dea r and exclusively dese rvin g of love: " my friends."
Those w ho seem to underclIt our ego-construct of self trigge r feel-
ings of mem al pain in us. They are grasped as in herently di slikable,
dese rvin g not lo ve but o nly anger and hatred. Billio ns of other
bein gs. human and an imal, w hich don' t seem to affec t o ur ego-
co nstruct o f self at the mo ment, are dismissed as "strangers" that
don' t matter enough to love or hate or eve n to warrant our notice.
Del"ded Elll otiolls alld the Cycle of Karlllic Reactioll

From such narrow misperce ptions of self and othcrs fl ow a ho st of
self-ce ntcred emotions (Sa nskrit: I.desha, T ibe tan: /lyon /IIOII}?):
attachm ent to o th ers as th e ve ry source of our happiness, hatred of

others as th e very source of our mental pain , jealousy of others'
success, prejudice, partiality, arrogance, and greed. As o ur strate-
gies to possess o ur fri ends and repel our enemi es £:1 il to sec ure us
any depe ndab le hap piness or sense of safery, we also sink into
despair, loneli ness, and dep ression. From thi s strea m of deluded
emotion flow hamlful acti ons of body, speec h, and th o ught (haml-
fu l karma) th at trigger others' feelings of hurt, evoki ng theiT neg-
ative respon ses in return , thus perpe tu ating th e sufferin g cycle of
mutual reactio n.
Because o ur ego- centered thoughts redu ce oche rs to such frag-

mented images of them, we tend to treat them in precisely the ways
we don 't wa m to be treated-with call o usness, disrespect, self-
righteo us anger, and partiality. Ironically, even as we react to o th -
ers in such negative ways, our minds tend to ascribe all such
nega tivity to th em , not to o urselves.
Fo r exa mple, do you remember the last time yo u beca me angry
when somco nc showed you disrespect, havi ng viewed you as merel y
dislikable? Or do yo u remember th e last tim e someo ne painfully
igno red YO ll , having dismissed you as merely a stranger? At that
mom ent} did yo u remember th e many times in th e past that yo u
had similarly showed di srespec t or ignored others, trigge ring th ei r
feelings of hurt? Probably not.
In order for us to be w ho we think we are, it feels as though the
o th ers must only be w ho w e think they arc. To commit to our nar-
row tho ught o f o urselves conmuts us to our narrow tho ughts o f
those aroun d us, rath er than to the actual persons beyo nd those
tho ughts. If a stranger cuts in line ahead of me, 1 view him instantly
as co mpl etely co ntempti ble. Perhaps he was tho ughtl ess at th at
mome nt, driven (like me) by his own self-concerned worries. Or
perhaps he had an emergency and was desperate to get hom e
qui ckly. But my mind, in that moment, co mmits to hi s compl ete
co ntemptibili ty in orde r to commit to myself as completely right-

eOlls-as if I had never cut in fro nt of others. Actually, over my life-
time I've cut in fro nt of others many times or wa nted to. That's
w hy it annoys me so much when others do it to me.
We react against the self-cen teredn ess th at we see 111 o th ers

because it nurrors the self-centeredness in us that o ur own nunds
have repressed and forgotten . As lon g as we co ntin ue to react to

o th ers as mi rro rs of ollr own hidd en negati vities, our reac ti ons
re Oeet their worst traits back at th em in turn. And their negative
response again evokes the worst from us.
The Map of Salllsara Is Both Illdividually

alld SO(ially Fabrirated
Others do n ' t experience th emselves as o ur ego- centered th o ughts
perceive th em , bur we react to them as if they did , as if they really
were only the sum total of w hat we think they are at the mo ment.
As if, in a mom ent of anger, your spouse or child were rea ll y just
someone who dese lVe5 rage and blame, not th e sacred objec t of yo ur
ca re. Or as if th e unknown perso n passin g you o n th e street were
really just a "stranger," nothing more-not a parent, sibling, or child
beloved by o thers, not a fully dimensioned being w ith all the hopes,
fears, and struggles of living and dying in this world. O ur momen -
tary thou gllt says, He's j ust a strange r, and in that mo mem we
believe that's all he is, don' t we?
If I put down thi s piece of writing, walk o utside, and enco unter
people on t he street, so me are ca tegori zed the mo ment I see th em,
preretl ectively, as " my frie nds" (who deserve love), some as " dislik-
able" or "enemies" (w ho deserve no lo ve), and the vast majority
not perso nally known to me as "strangers" (who have no value; w ho
matter no m a rc than a block of wood). Scc if thi s is not also tru e for
you. Our ego-cen tered thoughts red uce people in the mo ment of
enco unter to narrow, inacc urate labels, to cari ca tures, befo re we
even havc tim e to refl ect more consciously upon th em. This hid es
from us th e fu ll er, mu ch more myste rious rea li ty of eac h person ,

affecting how we react to everyone.
Indeed, in essence, that' s w hat "harmful karma" mea ns. It refers
to our men tal and ph ysical reaa iolls to th e self-ce ntered world of
"stran gers, enemies, an d excl usive fri ends" th at o ur own minds

make of everyone aro und us.
The natu re of all persons, like your own nature, is cogniza nce and
openness, e ndowed w ith innate capaciti es of goodn ess and wisdom,
but pattemed (like yourself) in to self- clin gi ng chai ns of thought and
reaction. All persons, like yourself, need and fundamentally deserve
enduring reve rence, love, and care as they undergo th e struggles,

joys, and desperations of living and dying cogether in thi s world.
No one is merely w hat our narrow, self-centered th oughts make of
him or her-merely a "stranger," merely " unlikable," merely " my
friend, " merely contem ptible, merely impressive or unimpressive,
merely stupid or smJrt. Everyone is /1//lch more th an that. And wh en
we hea r thi s teac hin g from the Buddha , deep down we know it.
W e recogni ze thi s truth.
The Map oj _Dualistic Discrimination Shuts D own

Our Capacity j()r Love alld Compassion
Bob r Rinpoc he has this to say:
The fundamental dysfuncrioning of our mind tak es the form

of a separation betwee n I and other. We falsel y grasp at an
" I" on whi ch anachmenr grafts itself at th e sa me tim e as we
conceive of an "other" that is the basis of aversion. This
duality preve nts the free and spontaneous express ion oflove
and compassio n and holds them in a potential state.l1
By discriminating among those whom we think dese rv e love

(" my fricnds") and dlOse whom we think do not ("strangc rs" and
"enemies"), our minds shut ofT ou r capacity for impartial love and
co mp3ssion . Such discriminations hide th e essential S3meness of self
and others- their innate capacity of goodness, th eir need for love.
It is th at underlying sameness to wh ich love and co mpassion natu-
rally respond. If we don ' t sense it, our minds narrowly restrict the
focus of our love just to ourselves and the very few who seem to
support our sense of self at th e moment.

Therefore, we don ' t think to respo nd to everyone on a daily basis
as if each dese rved endurin g reverence and love. After all , our ego-
centered th oughts tell us, all around me are strangers and potential
enemi es, who obvio usly deserve apathy o r ave rsio n. As people
aro und us react similarly, una ware they are reacting to their own
narrow thoughts of others, we together construct a world wh ere
calJ ous ness, distmst, and ill will seem normal. Q ur daily headlines
scream out th e resul ts-domestic abuse, road rage, virulent prej u-
dice, and :-.dd icti ons to alco hol , dru gs, gambl ing, or whatever di s-
tractio n helps people forget their troubled th o ughts of self and others
for a little w hil e.
T hi s exe mplifi es what th e Buddha call ed sall/sam- th e narrow-
ing oflife's richness, essential goodness, and mystery into a mentally
constructed cage of individual and social sufferin g.
Q ur preconscio us discrimi nation of a few bein gs that deserve love
from the vast maj ority that do not is the map of this suffering, sam-
san c world . All of us are caught up in o ur own similarl y deluded
maps w itho ut recogn itio n of the fact. It is extremely bard to see Ollr
sa lllsaric maps fo r wllat tlley are, f.1brications of deluded, self-ce ntered
th ought and emotion , since th ey are not just indi vi dual but also
social constructs, viewed as real by social consensus. When every-
o ne around me believes that only a few people deserve love w hile
most deserve just to be ignored, disliked, or feared, I become accus-
to med to reacting similarly. And as I trea t o th ers callo usly in that
way, I receive th e feedback that reinforces my im pressio n of th em ,
react accordin gly, and th ereby conditio n others aro und me to the
same delud ed vi ew. This is why most of us find it hard to beli eve we
co uld ever reali ze un conditional, all-inclusive love as a rea l human
possi bili ty. Th is is why our initial attempt to extend love be yond our
f.1 mili ar boundaries, to seeming strangers and enemies, is not so easy.

W hat to do? We are consta ntly in a struggle with o urselves and
others mediated by o ur own false, limited though ts of each other.

And we are so acc usto med to this falsity that we do n't eve n recog-
ni ze it Illost of th e tim e. H ow could we eve r find o ur way out of
such a problem ?
The Humall Capacity to TraflS(wd the Samsaric Map

But human beings are not j ust robots. We do have the potential to
conn ect at a more fundamental level and to ignore our patterned,
redu ctive j udgm ents of each other. H ere are two tru e stories, ini -
tiall y published as letters written to a literary journal, which illustrate
thi s possibility. In th e first, a boy exposes th e arbitrary na ture of soci-
ety's labels for people by not acknowledging those labels:
My twelve -year- old so n Alex was born with Dow n syn-

drome, an un fortunate name for his condition, for if there 's
one thing my son is not, it's down. He begins eac h day by
rushing into ou r bedroom and joyfu ll y holl ering, "Good
morning!" He greets his teachers wi th the same excitement
and neve r f.1ils ro give them a hug. In fact, he hu gs just about
everyo ne he meets, seeming to sense whi ch peo ple are mos t
in need of one . ...
I am an o utcast in th e D ow n-sy ndrome co mmunity
because I do not aggressively discourage Alex's hugging. H e
w ill fall prey to a child mol ester, I am told. He must learn to
behave like regu lar child ren, they say.
But he's lIot a regu lar child. And ch ild mol estcrs don' t
seem to have any trouble preying on regu lar child ren. Why
should 1 deny him one of th e greatest pleasures in his li fe?

Th e best thing he ha s to give the worl d is his boundless,
unprejudiced affecti on .
O ne afremoon, my two boys and I were walking down -
town. A yo ung man was com1l1g toward us 011 the sidewalk.

He was covered in tattoos and projected a fierce attitud e to
match. I went to pull my children out of his path , but Alex got
ahead of me. I watched in horror as my SOil bellowed , " Hi!"
and wrapped his anns arou nd the young man 's legs. I waited
for the 111an to push him away, or perhaps even strike hi111.
I 10 ~ Awakellillg Tllrollgll Love
But th e man, not mu ch more than a boy himself, instead

gave Alex a gentl e pat on the head. His attitude softened,
and he qui etly replied, " Hi." W ith a sweet, sad smil e, he
moved to the edge ohhe sidewalk so we co uld pass.))
Al ex's moth er acknowledges her son's gift- hi s ability to affiml

th e fundamental goodness of people by lovin g them impartially . To
love so inclusivel y is to suggest that the labels th:tt govern society's
reactions to people, l:tbels like "stranger," arc merely co nve ntional
and therefore ca n be dispensed wi th.
Alex 's mom and the "fierce" young man , like the res t of us,
bega n CO react through fragm ented concepts of each oth er. Bur sud-
denly Alex enacted w h:tt it's like to re spond to others as cssenti:tlly
good, beyo nd all reductive labels. With a hu g, he momcmarily lib-
erated everyone from th eir usual reactions, th eir suspicions and fears
of each other.
Alex's spont,m eollS affection for the young man as anoth er human
being, fundamentally good, naturally evoked the young man's kind
response. Suddenly th e truth seemed so obvious- what we all want
is respect and love. And when som eone exte nds th ose to us with-
out judgme nt, he evokes our respect and lo ve. Alex's "disability"
apparcntly gave him the super-ability to transcend th c limitations of
est:tblished social prejudice-co love and evoke love beyo nd cus-

tomary boundari es.
In the second story, a veteran nurse named Lucy becomes co n-
scious of her limiting assumptions, and the hum:tn reality beyond
th em, in a movin g way:

I th o ugh t I was havi ng a pretty good da y at work. I kn ew

w hat to do for my patients, and th ey seemed appreciati ve.
My hair was behaving. I wasn't ea ting too mu ch chocolate,
and I was treatin g everyone with kindness-everyone except
uwillg Beyolld Boulldaries ."¥- I I I
th e new nurse. She just rubbed me the wrong way, w ith her
sad, insecure smile. She was a little too eager, coo needy.
That eve ning I overheard the new nurse talking about her
stru ggle to become pregnant. She'd finally had a child at th e
age of thirty- nine, she told the listener, but the linle girl had
needed heaT[ surgery , an d th ey'd lost her to an infection. By
th at time, premature menopause had ended th e nurse's hope
for :moth er child.
Sh eepish ly, asked th e new nurse w hac her baby's
name was.
Her face lit up with a mother's love. " Reb ecca . She
wo uld be five next month! " She pulled out a phocograph of
a bea utiful, bright-eyed little girl. M y hea rt ached with
shame, sadn ess, and awe. " Thank you," I said. What I meam
was: thank you for teac hing me how mu ch I have co learn. ).!
Lucy, th e ve teran nu rse, ni cely sunullarizes how "self" and "other"

arc mutually fabricated in thought. Her thinking fabricated a narrow
self with cO lltrol over its world, a world of friends (appreciati ve
patients) and a potential enemy (the new nurse). When Lu cy over-
hears her nemesis tell her story, she sudd enly awak ens to th e nill er
human reality of the perso n. lnsranrly, Lucy's self- protective world
comes cr3shi ng down, and she feels only he3rt-wrenching empath y

for the new nurse. Then she feels asham ed for h3vin g so th oroughly
mistaken her narrow thou ghts of the person for the person. And she
feel s awe, for now she sees what the new nurse is-a sacred bein g
w ho transce nds all such narrow labels. Lucy's final response is grati-
tude to her for having revealed the ever-prese nt holiness of persons
rh3t lies beyo nd all th e prejudice and parti3lity of th e world 's labels.
Awe and gratitude are responses to th e revelation of th e real. T hey
arc signs that someone is starting to awaken to their hi ghest pote n-
tial That is what happened to Lu cy.
But such transfonnative encoumers arc rare, unpredicL.1ble. And

the fuller implication of such a revelation, th e potential for us to wa ke
up completely, is nm accomplished by j ust a random encoumer. The
purpose of a meditation practice is to enter into an awakenin g process
with imention, regularity, and cOllllllitlllen[. Our medit.1tion prac-
ti ce ca n be revisited every day to help awaken us more full y over
time. As the new nurse did for Lu cy, the meditation shows us our
sam sari c map- our reduction of others to ego- ce ntered labels for
th em. And like Lucy's encounter with th e new nu rse, th e meditation
libera tes our potential for awe-our potential to recognize the essen-
tial dignity, th e holin ess, of self and others beyo nd such labels.
Learning to Transcend Our Samsaric Map Through

Wisdom and Love
R ecognize others as being li vin g Buddhas, gods or god-
desses-ali splendid and divine in their own right .... Hono r
th ei r enli ghtened Buddha-nature, their innate divinity. See
th em in a new li ght, beyond personal distinctions, prefer-
ences and discriminations.
Wh en we first enter into th e meditation above , 3.t so me point we

find ourselves holding back from extendin g love-to a str3.nger or
to an enem y, perhaps. This hesitancy or resistance is what makes lIS
conscio us of th e boundari es of our sam sa ri c m3.p. As our un der-
st3. nding deepens, we le3.rn to recogni ze [hat map, how it fun ctions
and how mll ch ham1 our adheren ce to it has done. All of ti S,
together, have h3.bitually mistaken Ollr own self-centered th oughts

of bei ngs for the fu llness of them. And so we have all respo nded
with callousness and disregard , contribu tin g to the world 's prob-
lems, often in ways of whIc h we are not even COnsCiOlIS.
When we practice this meditation many times, we lea rn to rec-

ognize our narrow concepts of others for what they are: partial and
inaccurate labels. W e ca n lea rn to ignore such labels and co respond
more wisely to th e persons beyond memo That liberates o ur poten-
tial for impartial love.
Within th e second part of th e meditation , as we rest in th e wis-
dom of natural awareness, ou r minds relax their grip o n the self-
ce ntered th ink ing that weaves the samsa ric map of "strangers,"
"enemi es," an d exclusive "friends." Then, as we extend th e wish for
others' happiness in widening circles, the radiant power of impar-
tial love can methodically burn through that deluded map, liberat-
in g o ur potentia l.
All beings are rhe same as ourselves in three basic ways: ( I) They
all want CO be w ell, happy, and free of sufferin g. (2) They are aU lost
in self-centered reacti ons to their own narrow th o ughts o f self and
others. (3) They aU possess an innate capacity o f goodness that has
been obscured by the self-centered reac tions. .l{,
When we se nse th e underl ying sa meness of self and others in

th ose three wa ys, our narural response is love. Wh en w e don 't sense
th e sameness through prej udi ces and discriminations, we are lost
from love. Even thugs have moments of hon esty or affection , if on ly
to smil e at th eir chi ld or pct a dog. In the three ways noted, they are
the sa me as th e rest of us, but because they don't re cognize their

sa meness with all others, th ey don't usually act upon it.
As the radiant power of all- inclusive love burns through our sa m-
saric map, it touch es in on th e sameness of beings in their innate
goodness, self-clinging ways of thinking, and need for love. Becatlse

stich an attitude transcends the world's partialities w hile expressing
a deeper kn owing of beings, it is fa r more powerful and tfanSfOml J-

tive for all in vo lved than self-concerned f0n11s of affection .
Leamillg to Recognize My Own Personal Map

One of my most profo und spiritual teac hers. Lama Surya Das, is
remark abl y skillful at helping others catch on to the m ysterio us
reality that lies beyond their samsaric maps. He has practi ced under
th e tutela ge of some of the most reve red Tibetan tea chers of the
twenti eth ce ntury and is th e Ameri c l.n lin eage heir of Nyoshul
Kh enpo. w ith w hom he trained in multiple three-year meditation
retreats.
I first m et Lama Surya after I had already practi ced und er th e
guidance of many Tibetan lamas and had become an established aca-
demi c scholar of Buddhism. Though not conscious of it, I te nded
to look dow n on others w ho were not as lea rn ed in th e Buddha's
tcaching, the Dharma , or who didn ' t practice it in precisely the way
I did. I maintai ned a vivid mental map of who should be counted
as a worthy person and who should not, based on how similar th ey
were to me. Such disc riminations were all th e more fin11 beca use
th ey were rationali zed by my seeming kn owledge of th e Dharma. I
was not conscious of how much I mistook my own self-ce ntered
thou ght<; of others for the persons, even in th e name of the Buddha's
teaching!
I admired many Tibetan teachers but was cyni cal abollt Western-
ers who were identified as Dharma teachers. But th en I met Lama
SUiya Das at a short retreat in which his own transmission and teac h-
ing of D zogchen were so potent for me that I couldn ' t deny th eir
power. Afte r I met Nyoshul Khenpo, it became clear to me why this
was so. Lama Surya was one ofKh enpo's closest heart disciples in th e
rran smission of hi s profound Dzogc hen lineage.

O ver the next several years, I joined Lama Surya in many medi-
ration retreats, and my practice progressed, although I still retained

disc rimin atory attiwdes toward others. One day, to my surprise,
Lama Surya Das stopped talking to me! W hen he saw me comin g,
he wouldn' t acknowledge or even look at me but would effusi vely
u willg Beyolld Boulldaries ."¥- I 15
attend to anyo ne else in the room. He refused to parti cipate in my

impure vision of o thers, my viewing of th em " from above" as a
Buddhist sc ho lar-prac titi oner. Eve n though I was deepl y insulted
and humili ated by his action, some part of me knew J should co n-
tinu e to show up , not just rlln away to other Dharma and academic
se ttin gs w here my ego would be stroked in its accustomed ways.
Alth o ugh a ngry with Lama Surya, I return ed to medi ta ti on
retrea ts with him . My conscious mind was enraged th at he wo uldn 't
spea k to me, but below th e turbulence, my mind felt empowered
and blessed by his mode of abiding in pure presence and impartial
care for persons. J spent months wres tlin g with this co nundrum ,
Wh y wo n' t he pay attenti on to me th e way all Illy oth er lamas and
Dhamla colleagues have done?
O ne day on retrea t, just after a profound meditati on session with
Lama Surya, so mething dawned on me. During th e qu estio n and
answer session , I raised my hand: " Please tell me if this is tru c. A
teac her o f Dzogc hen is no t mainly communi ca ting with the stu -
dent's lIIi /ld (ego). R ather, he is cOl1ununicating with the //(lf ure of
th e stud ent 's mind, hi s buddha natu re." Before I'd said th e last
word , Lama Surya had already stru ck the go ng, signaling affi rma-
tion . It felt as th ough I were suddenly released from a grea t we ight
that had been crea ted by my own mind! Lama Surya wo uld not
coo perate with my ego's map of self and others. H e would onl y
affirm my dee per capac ity to know and care for them beyond such
self-centered ness. Buddha nature had become hi s boss, and to work
with him, it would have to become min e as well .
T hose w ho em body an all- incl usive, w ise love that doesn' t

believe in all th e worl d's sa msaric maps are profo undly liberating
fi gures for chis wo rld. Their very presence signals to che res t of us
th at ou r narrow labels are not che fin al defi niti on of anyo ne, includ-
ing ourselves- that all have a tremendous innace potential and wo r-
thiness. Such benef.,ctors are the ones w ho change this world instead
of merely promul ga tin g irs prejudices. This is the mysterious power

of figures sllch as Martin Lu ther King, Gandhi, Dietri ch Bonhoef-
fer, the Dalai Lama, and Lam a Surya Das.
Please take a brea k now for a little while. When you feel refreshed
enough to do the meditation above again, please redo it with the
fo ll owi ng fLInh er instructions.
M editatio n Tips to Unleash Self-Transcending Love

Recogl1izil1g YOllr OW1l Salllsaric Map
Foll ow th e meditation instructions aga in , and this tim e, as YO LI begin
to exte nd tile wish of love to others, notice when YO LI find YO llfself
holding back or resisting.
Perhaps yo u hold back from someo ne dear, who ap pears a bit less
dear than o thers. O r perhaps yo u hol d back frol11 a strange r; or
someone yo u have disliked . The moment you feel un able to wish
any person deepest happiness, pay atten ti on. No tice that what you
arc pulling back from is not the actual person bu t j us( yo ur narrow
th ought of him, as if the thought of him II/ere his fu U reali ty. R ecall
the story of the new nu rse. Consider how the full er reality of the
person- th e fullness of his life, his death, his inmost pocemial- rran -
sce nds your narrow label for him.
As you ex tend love just to the edge where you find yourself start-
ing to withh old it from someone, seize that moment to look vividl y
at yo ur own sa msa ri c map of others. See if YO li ca n discover how it
swings into ac ti on and holds yo u in bondage. For exa mple, th e
thou ght may co me, " But she's just a j erk (for so methin g she did), I
ca n't wish her hap piness." But is that really all she is? W hen pressed
to loo k, doesn't it seem absurd to believe that another human being,

in all her depth, is only a "jerk ," as if she were nothin g more than
a piece of trash? And is that really all you are-someone who men-
tall y reduces others to crash and completely believes such thoughts?
u willg Beyolld Boulldaries ."¥- 1 17
As your m o m e nt~ of w ithholding love show this to yo u, recogni ze

the mistaken view as the mistake that it is. R ecognize how we have
all been mistaking the fullness of persons for the reductive labels that
o ur own mjn ds have put on them!
Lean;lIg ;11 Past the Labels al1d Commu ning Heart to Heart
With this recogni tion in mind, those moments w hen YO ll find your-
self holdin g bac k from so meone can become th e doorway to trans-
formati ve insights and awakenin gs. Instead of beli evin g yo ur narrow
thought of the person, /Call ii, past that thol/ght to th e mysterious full-
ness and depth of th e person beyond it. As you lean in past th e
th o ught, let th e radia nt w ish for that perso n's well- bein g co me
through yo u . In this way, explore th e possibili ty of commun ing
with eac h such perso n hea rt to hea rt , ilU110st goodness to inmost
goodn ess. below th e "radar" of customary, ego-cente red think ing.
Learn to trust th e wish of love more than your redu ctive tho ughts
of others. Learn to tru st it more than others' th oughts of themsel ves.
Lea rn to trust it more than limiting thoughts of yourself-as some-
one w ho doesn' t have so much love to give. In this way, let your-
self commune wi th oth ers through that radiance.
This is a pro found and precious practi ce, passed dow n to us by
ge neratio ns of Buddhist masters . Only such un conditi onal and
endurin g lo ve ca n mak e us safe from the unbeli evabl e thi cket of

del uded th ought, reac ti on, and sufferi ng in wh ich we have all been
participating.
Progressing in D aily Practice

The meditati on of this chapter has the powe r to bring ou[ our
inmost powers oflove and to remake ou r experi ence oCtile w hole
wo rld in its li ght. But fo r that to happen we have to pro ceed
mcchodi cally, at our ow n pace, in daily practice ove r time.
Exp lore t he meditation at your own rate of progress. Eac h day, do

j ust as mu c h exte nding oflo ve as you fc:el th e in ner power to do.
Fi rst let the radiam wish oflove extend to a few beloved o nes. You
can foc lis o n th em for several days of practi ce. Then as the will and
energy of love strengthens , let it extend to a w ider ci rcle of dear
o nes and th en to wider cIrcles gr.J.dually over more days. W hen th e
will and energy of love feels powerful enough , let it ex tend to a
str:l.Il ge r, th en to mo re strangers; to a di sliked o ne, th en to more,
;]l1d so o n over furth er days of practice. In this W3Y, over wee ks and
months, move stage by stage from fri ends, to strangers, co disliked
3nd hated o nes at yo ur own pace.
At eac h such stage, w henever you find yo urself unable to extend
love w hol eh eartedly to someone or some gro up , recognize that yo u
are reacting to your own Itmjting tho ught of self and o th er (not to
th e fullness of them). Then lea n in past the thought and commune
heart to heart, using th e power of the w ish of un conditional love.
If it feels too difficult to lean in past yo ur tho ught that way, return
to the prior stage of the medita ti on. COlllilllle tile practice at tfle prior
stage IIlltil til e wish <'!flove is so strollg that it carries YOll 11l0re /latl/rally ill to
the /lext stage. For exa mple, if you find it diffi cult to extend love to
stran gers, return to the prior stagc--extcnding love just to dear oncs.
When th e will and energy oflove grows stro ng enou gh to c;]rry you
past yo ur foc us O il dea r ones, let it start natura lly to ex tend itself to
strangers.
Whatever sta ge of extending love you reach. always brillg ,IIat part
of tft e meditatioll to its COl/dllSiol1 by tllil/ki/lg ,hat ,lte radiaJlt wish of love
ex/ellds literally to all beillgs. Then after some time, dissolve into o ne-
ness w ith that insubstantial radiance. Complete the practice by ded-
ica ti ng its spi ri tu al power to fullest enli ghtenment fo r all .

Thro ugho ut the practice, if you feel yo ur mind beco me ti red
while ex tendi ng love, you can stop for a little while, rest th e mind,
and restart at th e point w here you left off.
Application in Daily Life

The power of love and wisdom grows stronger in LIS over many
momhs of such medjtation. As this happens, don 't make a big show
ou t of being loving! You are learning [0 bring out a more stable and
endurin g attitude of love than yo u've had befo re. T o begin to
embody this quali ty in life, let it express itself first in little ways, very
naturally.
Scart by being present within this loving attitude to yo ur partn er,
children, close friends, and others you meet regularly in your daily
life. Let th e ongoin g wish oflove help you be more full y an entive,
to listen more deeply. Let it help you treat those near you with more
reverence, kindness, and patience, more ge nerosity. in small ways.
Let it do th e S.lI11e in your relations hips wi th neighbors, co-workers,
and stra ngers throughout your day.
Allow th e powe r of love and wisdom to boost you r energy and
broaden yo ur perspective in work and life, but avoid becoming
over-excited by the spiritual power that arises from meditation and
maki ng a big show of your " love" in gra ndi ose ges tures. This just
indica tes a need for perso nal attention rather than auth enti c co n-
cern for the happiness and well-being of others.
As we explore th e integration of thi s practice in ou r dai ly life, we
see why dai ly m editation is critical to the process. Wh en we do th e

meditation of love and wisdom each morni ng, we can draw upon
it during the rest of the day by simply recalling it: Oh yes, the wish
for their happiness. That's th e way to be with others. What a reli ef
it is to remember that.
H ow Wisdo m and Love Empower Each Other

As we progress with OUT practice, we learn how every part of the
meditati on informs th e whole. The wisdom of lettin g be allows
I 20 ~ All'a/.:ellillg Tllrollgll Love
thou ghts, feelin gs, and sensations to self-release w ithin the expanse
of o pen awa reness, thu s internlpting the chains of ego-ce ntered
th o ught th at weave o ur samsaric map. As we learn to rest in funda-
mental awa reness, appearances of "stran ge rs," "encrn ies," and
"friends" ca n be recognized as ephemeral displays of thought. W is-
dom thu s un dercuts th e samsaric map that has inhibited o ur abili ty
to receive o r offer love.
R eceivin g love helps ease us into th e w isdom of letting be. In
additio n, the un conditional love we receive fr0111 benef':1ctors se nses
and responds to our inner worth beyo nd anyone's sa msaric map.
And th ;). t triggers o ur ability to otTer;). lo ve to oth ers that senses their
inner worth and reverences it in th em , no matte r w hat.
In sum, w isdom interrupts our map o f " friends," " strangers,"
"enemi es," cuttin g throu gh its fabricatio n. Love senses th e most
fundam ental goodn ess in beings that was always prior to Stich f.1b ri-
catio n. Wisdom strips away the self-centered co ncep tu alizatio n that
preve n t~ us from lovi ng impartially. Lo ve reso nates wi th the under-
lying goodness of all beings, below the " radar" of self-ce ntered con-
cepts of thc m.
Practice the meditation repeatedly in this spirit over weeks and
mo nths. Let th e receiving oflove ease yo u into th e wisdom of nat-
ural aware ness. Surrender there to sky-like ope nn ess awa re, beyo nd
all reference points of self-centered thinkin g. T hen let the energy of

that awareness manifest in th e vision of your benef:1ctors' radiant
love-receivin g it and extending it to othe rs. Let your benefa ctors'
intrinsic goodness commun e w ith your own . Let your intrinsic
goodness co mm une wit h that in o th ers, fin ally extend ing to all.
When yo u feel yourself pull back from anyo ne by mistaki ng yo ur
[ho ught for th e person, lean in past the thought to resonate heart to
hea rt, below the radar of your thinki ng mind.
As we Illedita[e in thi s way repeatedly over many 1110l1ths, we
learn to let wisdom release us into more love and love into more
wisdom. Ultimately, we discover that unconditional, bound1ess love

is the very radiance of our deepest wisdom- rigpa, the uncondi-
tioned , boundless nature of mind. This is the path of th e bodhi-
sattvas, holy beings w ho ha ve become spiritual bcne£'lcto rs to th e
world , radiating and embodying love [0 all unco nditionally , even to
th ose who have don e th em harm. This is what th e Buddha taught.
This is w hat o ur world desperately needs. And this is w hat we can
beco me.
The Will to Be Free and the

Power of ALlthentic ReFLlge
The Buddha identified two powers of mind neccssary to realize the
inner freedom and joy of enlightenment. They arc a stron g lIIilI to be
free (a lso called rellllllciatioll) and strong refllge. The lIIil1 to befree is the
profound wish to be freed from the causes of suffering in our minds.
In this co ntext, it is the wish to be free from bondage to the map that
discriminates th e few who dese rve love (" my friends") from th e
many w ho do not (all those "strangers" and "encmi es"). It is th e
willingness to rello/Illec such di scriminations.
Through meditation, as we become co nscious of our OW11 map
and of how mu ch all beings suffer from beli cf in sll ch maps, a new
sense of:twareness :tnd co nviction emerges. W e begi n to shift fro m

believing in th e map to wanting to be free of its power. Even :ts
limiting thoughts of others still arise in our minds, we :tre willing
now to di sbelieve and renou nce them. When the meditatio n tells us
not [Q tru st suc h limiting thou ghts but to lean in past th em, it is the
lIIilI to befree in us that says, Yes!
The power of refuge is the power of relying on th e very nature of

mind and its qualiti es, rath er than on th e ego-ce ntered reac tions of
th e mind. It is the power of relying on love, compassion, and wis-
dom , on th e prac[ices that bnng au[ those enlightened qualiti es, and
on th e community of practitioners who are mature in those qualities.

T he bllddllas are those w ho have full y awa kened to the nature of
mind (buddha nature) and to its enlightened qualities. So they have
profound knowledge of ways that others ca n awaken similarly. The
Dharma includes the nature of mind with its qualities and all the prac-
ti ces that bring out th ose qualiti es. Auth enti c sal/gila are peop le
mature in sti ch qualiti es from practice. From th eir own lo ng experi-
ence of the spiritual path, they are able to inspire, encourage, and
mentor ochers w ho enter into it. Th ose w ith ex tremely profound
realization of wisdom an d love serve as spiritual bcncf.Ktors of the
highest caliber, such as the teachers referred to throughout th is boo k.
As OllT m editation practice brings o ut rh e power of th is all-
incl usive loving wish, we increasingly sense the {ruth and righmess
of w hat is happeni ng. no matter how o utlandish it may have seemed
at first. The meditatio n thus natu rally takes us into refuge, wit h th e
instru ction "to trust this w ish oflove more than your own limiting
thoughts of self and o thers." To tm st and rely full y upon q ualities of
enligh{cnment- impartial love, compassion, and wisdom- to take
refu ge in those q ualities rather than self-centered thought<; in the
very moment such thoughts arise, that is authenti c spiritual refu ge.
To do that at any mom ent of the meditation is to step onto the path
of enlighten ment in that moment.
Thus rejilge and tllc will to befrcc emerge togeth er and emp owe r
eac h other. As we practice thi s m ed itatio n over tim e, we lea rn
in creasingly to distrust and reno un ce the partial ities of our self-
clingi ng thoughts by strengthening o ur reli ance o n th e impa rti al
love and wisdom that emerge from th e mind 's nature. Each tim e
we rely more on th e unconditional wish oflove for beings than on
limiting th o ughts of th em we are find ing refuge in our inmost

nature-budd ha nature-a nd manifesti ng it. Each sll ch mo ment of
practi ce takes us fart her o n the path by actualiz ing w hat enli ghten-
ment really is-enduring love and w isdom beyond self-clinging.
The Will to Be Free Supports ElIlpathy alld COlllpassioll

As we distrust and release our own deluded map of others through
practi ce, we also se nse more acutely what dri ves oth ers' apathy, iU-
will, and possessive ness, how others have bee n trapped in reaction
co their own deluded maps with no more conscious awareness than
we have had. From such understandi ng comes empathy for them
rather th an ri gid self-righteo usness. In this way, th e growing ren Uil -
ci:1 tion of our ow n sufferin g pa tterns becomes comp:1ssion for oth-
ers trapp ed in similar pattern s. And with this comes more freedom
co know and love persons in their dep th and fulln ess, rath er th an
remaining bound co habits of thought th at preve nt us from kn ow-
in g or loving anyone deep ly.
Refuge Becollles a lOlle 0/ Protectioll for All

The ca tego ri es of "friend ," "enemy," and "stranger" are also
exposed as being quite arbitra ry and changeable. They can shift in a
fl ash beca use o ur Ininds construct and reorder these ca tego ri es in
dependence upon the mom en tary ways that others :1ffect our se nse
of self. Wh en your child, partner, or friend says or does so mething
that di spleases or challenges yo u, your mind ca n shuttl e them so
qui ckl y into th e "enemy" category that yo u don't eve n rea li ze it's
happenin g. Yo u find yourself reacting angrily before yo u kn ow ir.
How l1l:1n y tim es has this happened to each of us? Is thi s how we
in tend ed CO be present to our tlmilies and fri ends?
In co ntrast, th e meditation practice provi des li S refuge in a mu ch
more stable :lIld endurin g reality. T he unconditional wish ofl ove is
not :1ffected by changing events, by w hat anyone does, not eve n by

o ur own shifting tho ughts of others. The practice directs us to trust
that wish more th an o ur limiting thoughts. As we learn that we can

return to this w ish of love anytime and rely on it full y, its protec-
tive, healin g power blesses our life so deeply, it is as if o ur loved
ones are encircled in a zone of peace and protecti on.
We are all ca ught in the same basic dynamic: acting eac h moment
as if man y others didn't deserve endu ring reverence and love.
R ec urrent indi vidua l clashes and commun al confli cts are the
inevitable resul t. To find refuge in our pote ntial for unwavering,
impartial love is to find a stable refuge for all perso ns, to bless them
in its li ght as sacred bein gs worthy oflove. It is to exrend refllge ro th e
man y-to e ncircl e all in a zo ne of healin g and procec tion . W e can
se nse thi s emergin g within th e meditati on and we ca n lea rn to ca rry
its protec ti ve power into every part of o ur worl d. This will be fur-
th er disc ussed in chapter 7.
My fri end Ellen sent m e thi s note w hil e tra ve lin g in Japan:
" Whil e we had bee n to J apan before, we ha d neve r visited
Hiroshima. This time we did. There is a lovely peace park and a
very well-presented muse um at w hat was gro und zero, [the site
w here the atom ic bomb landed]. As we walked through the park
and muse um , yo ur teachings were vividly th ere with me. It was so
very clear that the road of 'fri ends , enemies, and stran gers' leads
direcdy to Hi ros hima (and Baghdad, Darfur, the World Trade Cen-
rer ... ). In spirit, you were with me at that lovely and tragic place.
With lo ve and gra titude, Ellen."
As love an d wisdom empower each other in thi s practi ce, we are
drawn natufally toward th e place of absolute safety that is OUf
inmos t, un conditi oned nature. The deepest rt:fuge of all is fou nd in

th e nature of our minds, the un changin g essence of cogni zance and
emptin ess, dharlllakaya. This is the unconditioned clea r light of pri-
mordial, pure awareness that is beyo nd change and beyo nd dyin g.
Love empowers the mind to release its grip on dua lism and na rrow
self-co ncern , to relax into the unchanging wisdom of the deathless
nature of mind, buddha nature, nirvana. J1

Many spiritual benefactors, women and Inen on this path, have
radiated the ir un conditional love and compassion to us. Through
practices th ey passed down to us, we, too, can become aware of the
liberating power oflove, to receive it deeply and to exte nd it w hole-

heartedly. But how long did it take /I S to ca tch on CO tlus? H ow lost
have we been from th e po tential for love that we didn ' t know we
had? Like o urselves, don 't all others deserve the same patience and
respec t that o ur benef.lctors ha ve shown us? Don' t all the others
deserve trom us the same willingness to ex tend love CO th em , no mat-
ter how lo ng it may take for th em to noti ce o r receive it? Impartial,
un conditiona l love is its own reward, because it fulfills our profound
human need [Q unveil our deepest goodness for th e sake of all.
H ow Can I Extend Love to Someone

Who Has Hurt M e?
O ne stud ent asked me: " Wh en extending love, I recall a perso n
w ho said malicious things to me and to my fa mily. H e really hUTt
me. I ca n' t make a sin ce re w ish for his happin ess."
R ecall th e previollS chapter's discussio n of karma . We commonly
say, " H e hurt me by what he said. " But his wo rds didn't insert the
feelin g of hurt into lIS. If o ur mi nds didn ' t seize hi s words as hurt-
ful , we wou ldn't feel such mental pain from mere words nor would
we hold grudges for so lon g.
The problem is that we are all in th e habit of misidentifyin g Q[h-
ers' actions as the very source of our feelings of hurt or joy, so we

respo nd with hatred or possessiveness. But feelings of hurt and joy
occ ur wi/h ill our minds, as th e outflow of inner predisposi tions con-
ditio ned by our own past actions. Selfish actions th:l t a person has
done in th e past prepare hi s I11J11d to feel hurt, ill at ease, al ienated

from its innate nature of openness and well- being. Meditations and
actions of love, compassion, and wisdom that a person has don e in

th e past attun e his mind to its in nate nature, preparing him to feel
at ease, joyful, and well .
Wh en others say pleasant or unpl easant things to us, our minds
th en feel w hat they were prepared to feel by o ur own past ac tio ns.
Others' words are j ust the triggers for o ur current feelings. Even if
someone harshly criticizes us, if we didn 't have the self-concern , rh e
inner predi sposition to feel personally hurr by the words, th en we
would n't feel hurt. R emember th e example in the last chapter of my
wife's mother, w ho showed sincere comp:l.ssion for others despite
th eir rude beha vior to her.
The purpose of such karmic analysis is //O t [Q pinpoint blame. It has
nothing CO do with blame. It's to understand better w here evelyone
is coming from-why people do so many hurtful things to each other.
O ften, those we find difficult to love are th e ones w ho have don e
hurtful thin gs CO us. But anyone who is hurtful h:l.s :l.lsofelt hurt m:l.ny
times. He attributes his own feelings of hurt to other people, includ-
ing us, so he angrily seeks to hurt us in return . Then we mi stake hi s
angry words as th e very source of our mental hurt and hate him in
return , continuin g the cycle. This is the web of del usion and karmic
reacti on that everyone is ca ught in.
T o be shown and to understand the ca uses for so mu ch harm is
to be give n a precious opportunity-the chan ce, th ro ugh practice,
to be freed from bondage to this suffering cycle of reactio n, to learn
how CO res po nd instead from the inner freedom o f wisdom and
im partial love. With th e opportunity to realize such inner freedom
co mes th e responsibility to do so, for th e sak e of all .

O ne day a young Brahmin priest ca me to see th e Buddha . He
was ex tremely upset beca use his older brother had become a mem-
ber of the Buddha's asceti c community, th ereby ab:lI1don in g his
f.1t11ily's social caste. Feeling threa tened and angry, th e yo un g Bra h-

mi n di sparaged the Buddha at length in blistering terms. The
Buddha listened qui etl y and th en responded with a question, " If a

perso n brin gs a man a gi ft and the man refuses to accept it, to w hom
does th e gift belong?" The angry man replied, "The gift wo uld
belong to th e one w ho had brought it. " " In th e same way," the
Buddha explained, " I refuse to accept your an gry words. They

belong to the one w ho brought them."311
The Buddha's response was not a put-down. It was an act of com-
passion. T he w hole world is ca ught in the same delusory cycle: all
beings mistake others as the very so urce of theif mental hurts, seek
angri ly to hurt th em in retum , evoke similar responses ITom th e oth-
ers, and suffer endlessly for it. The Buddha's wise reply is an invita-
tion to brea k free of the delusion and to join him in ex tendin g
compass ion to all who remain ca ught in it.
Nevertheless, our capacity to extend love and co mpassion
unfolds at its own pace. We can't rush that natural unfoldin g and
mu stn ' t see k CO do so. In meditation , wh enever it feels too diffi cult
to extend love to someone who has triggered hurt in us, recall the
instru ction to recum to th e previous stage of the meditation , until
th e will and e nergy of love become stron g enough to carry yo u
beyond the prior obs tacle. If we proceed at our own pace, combin-
ing th e practices of wisdom and love as instfucted, impartial love
will increasingly blossom.
Wh en so meone becomes more highly trained, it is tau ght, th e
power of her wisdom and love becomes so strong that it over-
whelms inner o bstacles even as they arise. If such a bodhisa ttva, out
of habit, gives rise to a reductive, negative thou glu of so meone, th e
::trisin g of th e thought correspondingly triggers her co mpassion for

all who continue to believe such thoughts and sutTer for it. And if
she is co nfront ed by an adversary who is overcome by hatred for
her, it triggers her compassion, as if so meone dear to her were ove r-
come by mental illness. That is w here th ese practices lead.

What Abollt Very Evil People?

I am also asked, "What about very evil people, such as Hider, Stalin,
Pol Pot, Bin Ll.den, who have inrentionall y des troyed the li ves of so
many human bein gs? If we extend un co nditional love to th em, are

we not th en exonerating them from responsibility for their actions?
Shouldn' t we confrom grea t evil?"
First, we need ro investigate, Wllat is the evil? And how does it
become great evil? Evil ones are those most conunitted to reducin g
others ro th eir own self-ce ntered thoughts ofthem . Inste:-.d oflearn-
in g ro rely upon th eir innate capacities for lo ve and w isdo m , evi l
o nes put co mpl ete trust in th eir own redu ctive th oughts and the
deluded emotions that flow from such thou ghts. This le:-.ds to
extreme expressions of absolutistic self-ri ghteousness, megalomania,
virulent hatred and prejudice, th e ideologi c3 l reduction of who le
peop les ro w o rthl ess ness, and massive violence.
Those w ho point to Hitler as reason not to culti vate all-inclusive
love, insisting that people who are that evil should never be included
in such a w ish, do Hitler honor by im itation. T o believe that some
people do not deserve :-. wish oflove, that they are ollly to be hated,
is the belief that Hitler embra ced and took to its extreme. W e do not
confront so meone by joining him. Too ofte n one person's mindless
hatred evokes our hatred in response, our own inner evil. And ra th er
than acknowledge the fact that we are succumbing to the very evi l
we oppose, we indul ge the self-deception by insistin g that th e evil
in us is th e way to co nfront evil.
The Seed of Evil ill This World alld the Seed of Good
Hatred is never dispelled by hatred in this wo rl d. Ie is on ly

dispell ed by love. That IS th e eternal bw.

Shakyamuni Buddha
A ragi ng fire ca n start wi th a small spark , something we l11:-'y eas-

ily ove rlook. Similarly, grea[ evil stares widl :-' tin y spark in th e mind,
e:-.sily overlooked. The very instant that all yolle, a/I)'wllere, decides
that oth ers do not dese rve love, in that instant, th e seed of evil has
been born in this world. When that seed is well nurtured by people
and societies, it evolves into the greatest acts of ex treme hatred and
violence. As w ith H itler, all tlu s is done in the name of the good,
since the perpetrators place absolute trust in their own demonizing
th o ughts of ochers, justi fyin g their self-crc:J.ted sam sa ri c maps.
In the case of genocide, for example, tyrants eq uate the good wi th
their ideological reduction of milli ons of people to co mplete worth-
lessness, as "enemi es" and "strangers" to th e extreme. T hi s expresses
the will to identify others completely with that red ucti ve map, wi th
110 willingness to know the fullness of the peniOI1S beyond th e labels,
no will in gness to acknowledge that th ey are fund:ltnentall y the same

as oneself.
To decide that th ere are some w ho do nor deserve love is the
very seed of such evil. If nothing confronts that seed of evil , if noth-
ing radi cally c hall enges it, it can grow to colossal proportions o f
destructi veness w hile always clainung to represent the good.
In contrast, the very instant aIlYOI/C, all),lIIi1erc, makes a genuin e
wish oflove for all bein gs-no matter who those beings think they
are or w hat they think they are doing- in that instant th e very seed
of good is born in this world and the very source of evil has been
decisively co nfronted. The choice is ours.
Confronting Evil with Radical Goodness

The practices of this book are intended to co nfront eviL The
emphasis o n m editation th us fa r does not imply that th e power for
good it unl eashes sho uld not be applied to th e co ncrete needs of the
world. But we do have [0 practice such meditations repeatedly and
consistently over tim e to pemlit their effective power to manifest.

Specific applica tions wi ll be discussed furt her in th e fo ll owi ng chap-
ters, when we focus on ways to bring the power oflo ve and wisdom
into fami ly life, communi ty, work, service, and social action.
To speak to the ques tio n at hand, people w ho do evil are cer-

tainly to be confro nted in concrete ways, and it is the strength of
unconditional love and wisdom that ca n empower us to act deci-
sively beyond the limitations of brittle self-clingin g. Notice the pre-
cision of the wish oflove that we are culti vating, its depth, and rigo r.
It is th e wish for each person to have deepest well- being, Th rol/gh
and ,'"ollg", thoro ughly beyond all self-ce ntered delusions and
boncbge to hatred. T o wish that for a terrorist is to tota lly undermin e
hi s reacti ons to hi s own del ud ed map o f th e wo rld- to wi ll th e
destruction of the very roots of his des tm ctive ness. There is noth-
ing that haters detest more th an someone who targets th eir w hole
ratio nale for hating.
W hoeve r has committed himself to th e most evil patterns of
action mu st be preven ted from further han11ing. That requires force-
ful confrontation; o ne that holds the person responsible fo r his actions.
But that mea ns we are holdin g him responsible to hi s in nate capac-
ity to do other th an evil- hi s capacity to do good. If those who do
grave harm we re viewed as elltirely evil by natu re, possessin g 110
capac ity of goodness to justify a wish for th ei r inmost well- being,
then we co uld not hold th em responsible for their acti ons. After all ,
if they arc ollly evil, evil is all that they call possibly do .
Time and aga in , th e greatest human evils have arisen from deeply
co nfu sed th ought and emotion , from the un willingness to ackn owl-
edge th e underl yin g sameness of self and others and th e capac ity of
good in the m . Hitler, Stalin, Pol Pot, Bin Laden-that has bee n
their path . I f we wa nt to confront th em at [he root of th eir evil, we
wi ll have to fo ll ow a decisively different path, a path that evokes a

tremendous powe r of goodness to confro nt the root of ev il in all
O llr minds.
5. Pure Perception
and Profound Equanimity
If yo ll are pure within, all will be pure witho ut,

So have pu re vision regarding all things, m y heart- friends!
Nyoshul Kht:!l1 l~inp oc he .l<)
Seeing Past Our Delusions

The movie A Bem lfif"/ Milld chronicles th e tru c sto ry ofJohn N ash.
th e mathemati cal geni us who succumbed to par.moid schi zophrenia
and desce nded in to a delusory world of perceivin g and reacting to
no nex istent people.
After many years spent recovering from his iUness, Professor Nash
is visi ted at Prince ton by a represent;1tive from the Nobel Prize COI11 -
mittee, who infon11S him th at he has been nomin ated for th e prize
for his ea rly work on ga me th eory.
In J poignant scene, Nash realizes the investigator has been pur-

posel y scm to ascenain ifh e is sane enough to receive the Nobel Pri ze
in public. " Would I embarrass you? The answer is poss ibly. V Oll see,
I a/ll crazy," Nash says to th e in vestigator, w ho takes in this admiss io n.
" I stili see thin gs that are not here. I just choose no t CO acknowledge
them." At that moment, the investigator realizes that Nash has fo und
a remarkable ground of sanity after his long stmggle with his delusions.
Nash 's response is instru ctive for us. H e knows he is mentally ill,
tha t nonex iste nt people continue to appear to him. But h e has
learn ed to ignore su ch e11 se appearan ces, no matter how vividly they
132 ~ All'a/.:ellillgTllrollglJ Love
appear, by relying instead upon what is mo re real and mo re trust-

worthy: the love of his £-l.Inily and friends.
We are in an analogous situation. Most of tIS are not sc hi zo-
phrenic, of course. But like Nash, w e arc hau nted by a delud ed
visio n of others without realizing that it is just the distorted creatio n
of our OWI1 minds. For example, we te nd to view most bein gs
aro und us as nothing more than "strangers," unawa re that "stranger"
is merely th e product of our own th o ught . But like Jo hn Nas h, we
ca n learn , indeed are lea rning, to shift ou r attenti o n away frol11 that
deluded vis io n so as to con nect w ith th e fuller reality of the people
all around LIS through the power of love.
In the last chapter, we we re given th e secret of deep sanity, a
sec ret like John Nash 's. We dOIl't have to believe OIlY 011'11 lIarrow, redl/c-
rille thol/ghts of people. Even when our own thoughts tell us: "Thi s is
j ust a strange r," or "This person is j ust a j erk ," we Call ignore the
th o ught, lea n in past it, and connect with the fuller reality of the
perso n, heart to heart. We can drop out of the fickle, changeable
field of disc riminatory judgments, individual and social, which deny
th e fu llness and holin ess of each being.
Isn' t it exhausting to spend so much timcj udging everyone? W hy
not tak e a mu ch-n eeded vacation from th at sy ndro me? W hy not
connect with others in a more dependable way-by relyin g upo n
the endurin g and impartial wisdom of lo ve?

This is not an attempt to put on "rose-colored" glasses that hid e
the tfilth of others. It isj ust the opposite. We are learni ng to take off
the Coke bottle-like glasses that have obscured th e sacred truth that
eac h perso n is see n accurately ollly through eyes of w isdom and love,
th e eyes of the Buddha in li S, the eyes of God. Such pure vision is
no t some ideal from on hi gh. It is Ollr own inmost vision.

Pure Perception and Profoulld Eqllallimity ."¥- 133
Pure Perception ~
Pure perceptio n ... is to recognize th e buddha-nature in all

sencient bei ngs and CO see primordial purity and perfectio n in
all phenom ena. Eve ry sencien[ being is end owed w ith the
essence of buddhJhood, Just as [sesa me] oil pervJd es every
sesa me seed. Ignorance is simply to be unaware of th is
buddha- nature, like a poo r man wh o does not kn ow that
th ere is a po t of gold buried beneath hi s hove l. T he jo urn ey
to enlighte nm ent is thu s a rediscovery of this forgo tten
nature, like seein g th e ever- brilliant sun agai n as th e clouds
that have been hidin g it are blown away.
Dilgo Khye mse Rinp oc h e~'
As Khye ncsc I:t.in poche says, to perceive purely is to recognize

both the prim o rdial purity of phenomena and the b uddha nature
wi thin all se nti ent bei ngs. In meditation practice, as we lea rn to
rel inqu ish o ur ego- centered and dualistic frames of refe rence into
th e wisdom of natu ral awa reness, we sense the essen tial purity and
perfection of phenomena within the infinite, open, and un cha ngi ng
nature of mind- all th o ughcs , feelings, and sensatio ns recogni zed as
man ifes t:lti o ns of primo rdial awareness, like rays oflight recogni zed
by th e sun as its o wn express ion. This wisdom is the ul timate aspect

of pllre perception.
As the meditation furt her unfolds, we let the ene rgy of that vast
awareness manifest in the pu re vision oflove: fi rst by recallin g o ur
benefacco rs and rece ivi ng th eir un conditio ll:ll love and th ell by
extending that love to all others . Through impartial, all- in clusive
love, we sense th e intrinsic goodness of beings that is prio r to every-

one's self-cen tered tho ughts and reactio ns. Imparti al love knows and
reverences the intrinsic sacredness of beings, [heir inner dign ity, [heir
buddha nature. Th is love is the relati ve aspect of pure percepti o n.
The impure perceptioJl of ego understands others fro m th e head,

thin king, T his is the good one; that one is a j erk; that one doesn't
man er. Suc h impure perception pretends to a kind of o mni science,
as if such !inu red thoughts capcured the w hole tru th of others. Pure
perceptioJl, in contrast, is a power of knowing from beyond our egos.
It se nses ochers intu itively th rough the wisdom and love that valu es
each o ne as holy mystery, beyond the grasp of self-ce ntered, redu c-
tive thoughts.
For this reason, as we begi n to awaken to such pure perceptio n in
meditatio n practi ce, it dawns on us that we hadn't kn own others
nearly as well as we had previously thought, even those nearest to us!
l:1 eca use now, ra th er th an knowing them just rhrough our f.l l11iliar
thoughts of them , we are starting to sense th em fro m a deeper place.
Wh o is doing this pure perceiving? It is o ur inn er capacity of wis-
dom and lo ve that does th e perceivi ng; o ur buddha na ture, not our
brittle, self-concern ed egos. Only our inmost good ness can sense so
directly the esse ntial purity and goodn ess of others. We let o ur
buddha nature, o ur primordial capacity of w isdom and love know
oth ers in th eif buddha nature, their intrinsic worthin ess and holi ness.
We learn to "see" bei ngs from the depth of o ur heart, rath er than
thro ugh ego-graspi ng consciolIsness.
Pure Perceptioll Is all Active Power alld atl Offering to the World
The teml pll re perccptioll can be deceptive because we mi ght think
that it denotes a merely passive kind of observing. But it is really an
acti ve powe r of knowing. Through th e mediutio n, po tent energies
of knowing and loving that had been hi dden in our minds are
unl eashed. Indeed, it begins to dawn o n us that, as we extend love,
we are no t just /jIisitillg fo r others to have well- bei ng and joy, we are
acrually cOII/IIIII//i//g with the primo rdial well- being that already abides
in the natu re of their minds. Our buddha nature is (o mmllllicatillg with
rh eirs, below {he radar of self-centered understandi ng.
T here is mo re. Pure perceptio n not only perceives and commu-

ni ca tes with others' inmost goodness and well-being but also evokes
it by calling it forth from th em . We can see now how this process
manifests in OLlr meditation practice: w hen we receive th e wise love
of our bene£1c to rs, our own enlightened potential of love, reve r-
ence, and j oy is evoked and brought forth . In th e same way, wh en
we exte nd thi s powerful love to oth ers, it helps awa ken th e ir
enlighte ned pote ntial.
In the summ er of 198 1, w hile I was J PhD stude nt in Buddhist
Studi es at the Uni versity of Wisconsin , my teac her Ges he So pa
in vited H .H. t he Dalai Lama to M adi son to give rhe transmission
of Kalachakra, a special Buddhist empowe rm en t. It was th e first
time such a teaching was to be offered in rhe West. My wife Bar-
bara and I were put in charge of finding housing for all w ho wanted
to come, in cl uding many T ibetans and high- rankin g lamas travel-
ing frol11 Europe and throughout North America. T he U ni ve rsity
kindl y provided som e low- cos t college donns to help house th e
participants, and it turned out that we had to use every available
space for accommodations.
We ended up ha vin g to ass ign a renown ed lama named N ec hung
Rinpoche to a dorm room that was rather dark and dingy frol11 ge n-
erations of usc. Nechung Itinpoche was the eype of spi ritual tC;lc her
w ho just naturall y ex uded warmth and kindn ess, and Barbara and I
loved to be ncar him . After the Dalai Lama's teac hings were COI11-
pleted, we went to see him in his small room to say goodbye. He
welcomed us as if we we re honored dign itaries. Barbara and I were
aghast at th e stai ned and scarred walls and apologized for rh e shabby
acco mmodatio n, bur Rinpoche just looked at us wide-eyed, as if
he had 110 idea w hat we were talking about. " This place is a pure
realm ," he declared, hi s face filled wi rh gra tirude and joy. Barbara
and I exc hanged a qu izzical look, rhinkin g, He actually means it!
That din gy place wa s heaven fo r him, and {h e people all around
were divine bei ngs in his eyes. In spite of our initial bewilderment,
his pure view became infectious. Suddenly, we to o felt totall y
blessed to be right there, as if it truly were a holy realm, and we,
with him, were pure and holy beings.
Rinpoch e's pure perception was not merely a pass ive knowin g
but an acti ve and evoca ti ve presence of lo ve that mirrored the
puri ty he saw in people back at th em , helping th em sense their own
sacredn ess. During th e course of our li ves, don 't we ofte n feel like
we are inhabitin g a shabby place surrou nd ed by "strangers"? That
is w hy it is so liberating to be in the prese nce of a spiritual bene-
fa ctor who simply doesn' t believe in suc h limiting ego-constructs
of th e world. Wh en someone abid es in a purer vision , th eir pres-
enCt' signals to us that our reductive labels are false, that all those
around us are hol y, prec IOus bein gs, eve ry si ngle one. For anyo ne
to abide in such vision is to make a trem endo us offe rin g to this
world, fo r it holds the door open for many others to also co me to
recognition of th eir true selves.
This is why benefactors such as Mr. Harrison, Nyoshul Khenpo ,
C ho kyi Nyima i:t.inpoche, Lama Surya Das, N echung Rinpoche,
and others have made such an impression o n me, affecting th e
co urse of m y life. This is w hy Alison Luterman 's store clerk had
such a powerful effect on her. Indeed, this is what draws us to pro-
found spiritual benefactors: th e liberating power of th eir pure visio n

indicatcs that enlightenment is real, that human bcin bl'S call discove r
and lea rn to embody th e pure, enlightened visio n o f nirvana, right
here and now, in this dingy, sa msaric world.
By understanding that the meditation oflove and w isdo m can lead

us from impure vision toward pure vision, we learn to cooperate
with it and to experi ence it more deeply. We can increasin gly let th e
meditation undercut Ollr Impure perception of othe rs as merely
"stranger" or " dislikable." We can lean in past such concepts by the
power of wi se love, as if leaning into others' hearts to sense th eir
inner digni ty. As the meditation strips away our adherence to such
reductive labels, it increasingly awakens the dormant po wer of
un co nditional love and intuiti ve knowing w ithin us, our buddha
nature.
In th e m editation of the previolls chapter, we join ed our spiritual
bellef.1ctors in th ei T lIIisl! for beings to be well. In the m editation that
follows, we begin explicitly to join th em in th eir pllre perceptio/t of
beings as primordially good. We learn, like th em , to perce ive, CO I11-
mun e with , and evoke the esse ntial goodness of bein gs. W e learn to
cooperate with this pure perception of the heart that senses others
in their deep wonhiness, even as we continue to learn, lik e J o hn
Nash , to ignore th e impure perception of rhe h ead that redu ces
them to cari ca tures.
Please pause for a little whil e after each demarcated secti on, to
dwell 0 11 the m editation instru ction at hand.
Meditation: Awakening Pure Perception

Part I: Receiving the Blessing oj Unconditional Love
Sit in a relax ed way. R ecall your benefactors, including

deeply spiritual figures sllc h as enlightened beings, your sp ir-
itual teach ers, and their teac hers. Envision their smilin g f.1c es
before you as th ey se nd you the w ish oflove, rh e wish for
you to have deepest weB- being, happiness, and joy.
Bathe in the hea ling energy of th eir wish. Receive its gen -
tl e radian ce into every part of your body and mind , frol11

h ead to toe.
After a litde while, join your benef.1cto rs 111 their wish,

repeatin g it for yourself whil e receiving th e radiant blessing
of thei r love even more deeply: "May this one have deepest
weU-bei ng, happiness, joy."
Mter some time, d rop the visuali zatio n and relax into one-
ness with th at loving radiance, dropping all frames of refer-
ence. J ust let be into that gen tl e, lumin o us w hole ness,
beyond separation of self and others.
Part 2: Letting Be in Natural Aware11£SS
Notice any grasping in the body. Let that gen tly release itself.
Let all bodily sensations se ttle naturally in their own way.
Surrender to the nanIral power of th e body, feelin g it
embody yo u.
Let the breath come under its own natural power. Feel it all
the way in , all th e way our, breathing yo u.
After a linle wh ile, notice any grasping o n to th e thinkin g

mechanism in your mind. Let th at rel ease itself, permitting

thoughts and sensa tions to arise and dissolve under their own
power. Thus let the mind unfurl and fall to tally open-at
ease, unrestric ted, free of focus , all-pervasive, w ith the gaze
of yo ur eyes expa nsive. Let all be just as it is in co mpl ete

openness and acceptance.
Se nse the open ness of awaren ess, boundless and w itho ut

ce nte r, in wh ich tho ugh ts and sensations self-a ri se and
self-dissolve-beyo nd thinking, beyo nd reference point,

infinite openness and tra nslucent awa reness, pervasive like
th e sky. Let this vast expanse sense all th at arises as its own
radia nt expression. R est as that sky-like nature of mind-all
phenomena permitted to self-arise and self- relea se within the
vast expanse of open ness aware.
Part 3. Lmillg Pure Perceptioll Ullfold

After some time, recall yo ur benefac tors, including spiricuai
figures and enli ghtened bein gs. Envision th em thi s tim e
behind you and just above. They are sendin g you the wish
of love, the wish for YO ll to have deepest wc ll- bt.' in g and
happiness. Accep t the healing radiance of th eir love into
every part of your body and mind.
Now envision before you several beings that are dear to you.
Wh ile receivin g yo ur benefactors' radia nt wish frO I11 behind,
le t the rad iance co me through YO ll to the beloved ones
before YOll . W hile doin g so, make th e wish oflove for them
repeatedly: " May th ey have deepest well- bein g, happiness,
and joy," bathin g their bodi es and minds with its loving
energy.
If you find YO ll are holding back from any bein gs as less
dea r th:lIl o th ers, noti ce how yo u arc encounterin g yo ur
own limitin g thought of them, 110t the fulln ess ofth el11. Lean
in past that though t to COllU11Une more fu lly with them
th ro ugh th e rad iant wish of love-heart to heart , inmost

goodness to in most goodn ess. Irradiate them all equall y
while repeati ng that wish .
N ow along w ith th e dear ones, envisio n seve ra l stra nge rs

befo re you. Letting th e radiance from your benef..1ctors come
throu gh you to them, repeat th e wish of love for all in front
of you , bathing th em with its loving energy. If yo u find
yourself holding back from any as mere "strangers," notice
how you are encounterin g your ow n limiting th ought of
th em as "stl.lnger," not th eir full ness. Trusting the wish of
love mo re than th e th ought "stranger, " lea n in past th e
th o ught to commun e more fu lly with th em through th e
radiant wish of love, heart to heart. Illumine all th e beings
before yo u equally w hil e repeatin g th e wish.
Togethe r with the others in front ofyoll, now also envision

seve ral persons for whom you have felt dislike, avers ion, or
hatred. Letting th e ra di ance come through, repea t th e wish
ofl ove for aU in fro nt of you, bathin g them with it~ lovi ng
energy. lfyo u find yourself holding back from those yo u've
di sliked, noti ce how you are encoun teri ng your own
thou ght of th em as dislikable, not their fullness. Trustin g the
wi sh oflove more than thou ghts of di slike, lean in past such
thoughts to co mmun e wi th them through th e radiant wish
of love, heart to heart. Irradiate all equall y whi le repeatin g

the wish .
Now imagille that tile lllminolls field of benifactors behilld YO II

merges completely illto YOllr !teart. Sense the loving energy radi-
atin g from your heart as one with all your benet:1crors and
o ne wit h all enli ghtened bein gs and yo ur spiritual teachers.
Le t your heart, unified with those benef..1ctors, radiate
boundless ly to sentient beings like th e sun , in ;'Ill di recti ons
at once. R..epeating th e wish of love, bathe all bein gs in it~

energy while commu ning heart to heart with them: " May
eac h being have deepest happiness, well -being, and joy." Let
th e e nergy of that wish overwhelm any remaining inhibi-
tions you may have, radiating out spontaneously and alJ -
inclusively, as if a buddha in yo ur hC:l rt were radiating
through yo ur mind and body to all bein gs at oncc.
ACreI' some time, drop the visualization and just let go into
oneness with that lovin g, insubstantial radi:lnce. Rel e:lse all
fr:lt11 es of reference into boundless openn ess and translu cent
aWart.'ness, pervasive like the sky, beyond any thought ofsep-
aratiol1. l'tes t thus, at ease, complete.
Part 4, Dedicatillg the Liberatillg Power for All
Feel th e p ower of this practice to pull yo u beyond self-

grasping patterns of suffering and to open yo u toward th e
tranquillity, freedom, and good ness of your inmost being.
Pr:lyerfu ll y dedicate all such spiritual power to th e deepest
well- being :lnd liberation of all beings, each like YOLl in need-
in g and wantin g such joy and freedot11.
The Buddha Within Does the Perceiving

Mergillg with the Pllre Pemptioll of Ollr Spiritllal Beliefactors

At the final stage of the meditation, the field ofbenefactofS merges
into oneness wi th our own heart. ~2 We experie nce th e power of

love in our heart:ls one with th eirs. W e ca n thereby di scover th:l t
th e hea rt of lo ve within our benefa ctors is ultimately one with our
own, and that our heart, like th eirs, is also linked to th e h e art~ of
many o th ers. Indeed, w e are discoverin g that o ur inmost hea rt, like
theirs, is the hea rt of a buddha.
As such practice matures, it feels as if a buddh a of imparci allove
and wisdom lo ng buried in us were starting to wa ke up and act right
through o ur mind and body. It is as if a buddha w ithin , long inhib-
ited, were now fin ally allowed to unl eash its kn owledge and li ber-
atin g energy-to radiate its vast enli ghtened w ill fo r th e welf..1 re o f
bein gs and to communicate w ith th eir basic goodn ess. At this stage
of prac ti ce, we are no t just wishillg for o thers' well- bein g, we are
starrin g to COllllllllll e w ith and evoke th e very so urce of their well-
bein g, th eir o wn inmost potential of love and w isdom .
Such pure perceptio n (Tibetan dag nang) is not so methin g we
arrive at just by thinking abo ut th ese ideas o r abo ut the meditati o n
instru cti o ns. It emerges naturally from th e gro und o f o ur bein g
thro ugh lo ng, regular practice of the mcditati o n. As practice brin gs
o ut the inn ate power of pu re perceptio n and loving energy, it
begins to flow beyo nd sessions of medi tatio n into our o rdinary day,
ge ntly info rming o ur life, our w ork, and o ur relatio nships. In this
subtl e process, we are not j ust se nsin g bcin gs aro und us through
o ur eyes an d ears but through our heart. There is a so[t, natural res-
o nan ce of kn owing and lo vin g that intuits the in trinsic goodn ess
and purity of perso ns below th e fabricati o ns of all o ur red ucti ve
minds. This is how Nec hung Rinpoche w as prese nt CO Barbara and

me. This is ho w an yone w ho takes up thi s practi ce can learn to be
prese nt to o th ers.
T o put it another way, in th e moment of unconditi o nal love it is
not th e ego-cen tered self th at is view ing but the powe r o f love
view ing thro ugh yo u. In that mo ment you are surrendering "your
own " poim of view to th e buddha's-as if you were a window fo r

th e buddha's un conditional love to shin e thro ugh yo u. Such love
feels as ifi t co mes fro m beyond o ursel ves whi le also, pa radoxically,
fro m most deeply w ith1l1 . This pure perceptio n , buddha VISIO n ,
comes through us as we, like j ohn Nash, lca rn to ignore the delu-
sion of "enemies" and "strangers" that had closed it out.
RUOgl1 izillg a Correspolldillg Truth ill Other Traditiolls

The practice wc are learnin g gives us the experiential knowledge to
recogni ze sacred truth w hen we he3f it, whatever its sourcc. Fo r
example, one of my Catholi c colleagues at Boston Coll ege, Father
Mi chacl Himes, describes an analogous viewpoint for beco min g a
wi ndow for God's love by embodying un co nditi onal love for oth -
ers. He writes, " The whole last supp er disco urse in j ohn 's gospel
(chapters 13- [7) is a magn ificent reflection on love and co mmunion.
And , astonishin gly, not once does j esus ever tell his discip les to love
God, although wc arc repeatedly told to love one another. For God
is not the objec t of love; in a se nse, God is not eve n the subject of
love .... God is the doing, the loving." God is the power of unco n-
ditional love that comes through persons, willing deepest good for all.
R elated to this, Fr. Himes notes, come teachings from jesus that
have shocked many people, such as: " You have heard it said that
yo u shall love yo ur neighbor and hate yo ur enemy. But I tell yo u
that you mllst love yo ur enemi es and pray for those w ho persecllte
yo u." Wh en some ask him why, J esus replies, " ... you mu st do so
to be children of your Father in heaven who makes the sun shin e on
the wicked as well as th e good ... " As Fr. Himes notes, " Th ere are
no bounds [0 God's love, so do not put any bounds to yours." To
be receptive to God II/calIS to become transparent to the ac tive, all-
inclusi ve, and ull conditionallove that is God. H
Sacred Texr, Image, and Pracrice Illumin e Each Orher

O ur meditati o n practices have been transm itted dow n [Q LIS from an

ancient past and can thus provide a window im o understanding the
inner meanings of ancient scriptures and iconographies. An ancie nt
Buddhist text called the Tarlwgatagarblw SlUm (Buddha Na fll re Scrip-

fIIrc) is renowned for revea ling through images what is intuited in
meditati on. At th e begi nnin g of the sc riptu re, Buddha Shakya-
mu lti enters a m edita tive co ncentration and ge nerate s a luminous
vision that is witnessed by a hu ge ga thering of beings. In the vision,
an infinite array of lotus flo wers appears, ri ses up , and fill s th e
whole sky, emanating colorful rays of li ght in all direc ti ons. Hid-
den within eac h flo we r is a radiant , sea ted buddha form, com-
pletely still. Suddenly th e lo tus flowers open and w ilt away,
revealing the iuminollS buddhas. Each of th e infinite buddhas radi-
ates li ght in all directions, tran spo rting the assembly of witnesses
with ecs tasy and wo nder.
Shakyamllni Buddha then explains the meaning of this startling
visionary image co the astonished throng. Someone with extraordi-
nary perception, he says, is able to pe rceive th e prese nce of the
splendid, unmoving buddha forms concealed within th e lotus flow-
ers, eve n w hi le they remain hidden from the ordinary perceptio n of
other beings. But w hen the lotuses open and wither away, then all
beings are able ro see th e lumi nous buddha fo rms and come to rec-
ognize that they had been present all alo ng.
Similarl y, Buddha Shakyamuni, with hi s pure perception, sees
throu gh th e deluded discriminati ons of se nti ent beings into th eir
untainted, already-abiding buddha nature. He senses directly that all

bein gs " have a tathagatagarb ha [buddha nature] t hat is eternall y
unsullied and that is replete with virtues no different from my own ."
From this awakened pe rspective, he teaches the way for beings to
cur through thei r delusions, so that th ey wi th er away like the lotuses

in the vision, and thus all may realize the innate buddha ness hidden
within their minds and bod i es.~~

Because our tradition is hi storically conn ected to such scriptures,
we can see how text and practice infonll each other. In our medi-
ration we are discoverin g th e innate buddha that has bee n hidden
w ithin o ur minds and bodies all along, a great capacity of un co ndi-

tio nallove and pure awa reness that disce rns and reso nates w ith the
correspo nd ing ca pacity that is hidden w ithin all othcrs. This is th e
dawn in g of pu re perceptio n . Ou r meditatio n is not just some des-
perate atte mpt to try to see o th er beings as goo d. It actually mts
th rollgh th e obscuratio ns of th e di scrimin:ttin g min d th at had hi dde n
th eir intrin sic worth and di gni ty, so we can commune with th em o n
th at level.
C hapte r 3 men ti o ned that many exampl es of Asian litera ture and
ico nograph y image the attainment of enlight enm ent in terms of
" pure buddha realms." In such literature, buddhahood , full est
enlightenm ent, is no t depicted as an isolated accomplishm ent th at
stands apart fro m beings. R ather, fully enlightened awareness man-
ifests in a lumino us budd ha fo ml that radi:a es its qu alities of love,
compassio n, and li beratin g power to a vast circle of bod hi sa ttv3s and
through them to innumerable other bei ngs.
Such a budd ha fo rm comes to be designated in Sa nskrit t ext~ as
sall/b/lOga -kaya. Sam ca n mean "compl ete" o r " toge ther w ith, com-
mun al. " Bhoga means "enj oyment," and kaya mea ns " body." T o
refer to budd h .. hood as sa /ll bhoJ:a~ ka )'a , then, is to imply that the COII/-
plete rea li zation of enli ghtenmcnt is exp eri enced COHIll/III/ oily,
embodied in jo)'ol/s co mmuni o n w ith many o th ers thro ugh th e w ise
love that wills deepest freedom for all. T o be full y enli ghtened is to
have fu ll y un leas hed th e liberating power of such enli ghtened qual-
ities, so that th ey spo ntaneously bless and evoke the correspo ndin g
goodn ess do rmant in th e hea rts of many o ther b e in gs.~ s
T his imagery infor ms o ur understandi ng of pure percep tio n, fo r

w ith increasing practice experience we sense that we are participat-
ing in a purer dim ensio n of rea lity previo usly unnoticed, to res-
o nate w ith the dee per tru th an d dignity of bein gs below th e radar
of di scrim inatory minds. In creasingly, th rough practice, this mun-
dane, everyday wo rld is rediscovered as a " buddha realm," a pure
dim ension of radiant co mmunion, each being sensed in reve rence
and love as hol y mystery. -ll· And when we encoun ter others w ho
inhabit th e world in this way-our mentors, teachers, benefactors-
they help evoke our own capacity to do so as well .
Mirroring the Purity of Beings,

Relaxing into the Purity of Things
To Riff"t Others' Goodness is to Call it Foeth fro m Them
Pure perception, then, doesn't just view others in their basic good-
ness; it reflec ts their goodness back at th em , helping th em become
newly co nscious of it. Pure perception doesn' t just perceive others;
it blesses them. It isn't just pass ive but quietly acti ve, triggering
openings fo r oth ers. Just to abide within such an attitude of uncon-
ditional love is deeply heal ing and beneficial for all other beings.
This is w hy the simple process of reca Uin g our benef.1ctors is so
transformative for us. By doing so , we experience again how they
blessed us through the un conditional way they viewed us, how they
evok ed our best self before we were even conscious that th ey were
doing so . Our most important benef.1ctors didn ' t bdieve th e limited
ways we thought of ourselves. They saw through us to o ur under-
lyin g goodn ess, helping it to awaken.
Back in the [980s, Barbara and I lived fo r about a yea r in India,

near a learned and saintly Tibetan sc holar nam ed Geshe Tubten
Tsering who taught at the Institute of Tibeta n Studies in Sarnath.
Under hi s tutelage, I studied texts on the nature of full enlighten-
ment, buddhahood. Geshe T sering lived in an im pove rished hut,

with few belongings except his sacred texts. Each morning he made
offerin gs of milk tea to th e enlightened beings, w hi ch t.1t little mi ce

happily slurped up over the course of th e day. He was in so much
demand by studencs from the Tibetan Institute that they crammed
into his hovel throughout the whole day, yet somehow he made
ti me for them ;tIl. W hoever entered his little hut fel t welcomcd, 5.1fc,
reverenced, and blessed, as if they were encering a sacred world.
W hile studying and engagi ng in philosophical debates with him ,
he trea ted me with such gentle respec t and love that, w hcn I rcluc-
tantly left at end of th e day, I fel t like a di ffe rent perso n. Something
was awa kened in me by hi s presence, a deep desire to be lik e him
an d a recogn irlon that so mehow, mysteriously, I could . It made me
feel grate ful to be ali ve. In retrospect, I reali ze, he taught me about
buddha hood no t just in th e way I expec ted , through inteUectual
studies, but also through the enlightened qualities he imparted from
hi s w hole man ner of being. He was a remarkabl e teac her, w hose
effecti veness fl owed fro m his unwaverin g and un co ndi tional love
for all whom he served.
UI1(Ollditiollal Love 15 the Most Effective Motivation for Service

Such lovc is by f.1 f the most effec tive mQ[ive force for se rvice to
others. Wi th out it, our activity for others is severely limited. W hen
th e primary m otivatio n fo r service is ego-o ri e nted, we tend to
qu ic kly burn o ut fro m self-ce ntered fru stratio n, becomi ng di sap-
pointed w hen things don't work out as expected, or people don't
exp ress cnough gratitude or thanks. Wh en th e purer perception of
un conditional lovc emerges from Ollr meditati on into our workday,
it co mes from beyo nd o ur egos and is focused on oth ers' di gnity

and well- bcin g beyo nd our self-centcredn ess. Through it, we begi n
to sense others as differe nt versions of ou rselves and ca n serve them
fro m th at perspecti ve.
T hro ugh regular prac tice we ca n lea rn , li ke Ges he T se rin g, to

recall the wise love fco m our meditations and to draw on it as we
work with people th roughout o ur day. We don' t have to get co ntrol

over all circ umsta nces or receive lots of recognition fo r our acti ons.
It is sufficicnt simply to serve many others whom wc are now in clud-
ing in the widening scope of our love. Th en, regardl ess of th e
response or th e results, we realize that we don't have to become bumt

out , frustra ted, or angry. This way of being and actin g is L1r more
effective and helpful than a lot of self-concerned " helpin g" activity
that lacks such boundless motivation. Integra ti on of our practi ce inro
our li ves will be further discussed in chapters 6 and 7.
Pllrr Peraptioll as Love alld Wisdom

Evokes the Same ;/1 Others
As love and wisdom inform each other throu gh the distin ct sections
of our meditation, the pure perception they bring out is not just a
love for beings in th eir intri nsic worthiness. It is also a penetrating
wisdolll th at senses th e perfectio n of every aspect of experience in its soft,
radiant, and insubstantial nature, beyond the reductive thinking of
self-centered mind. This is w hy Dilgo Khyentse flinpoc he, in th e
previo us quote, defin ed pure perception in thi s twofold way: " Pu re
perception ... is CO recognize the buddha-natu re in aU se nti ent bein gs
al/d to see primordial pllrity alld peifectioll ill all pilel/Olliella."
Wh en othcrs look upon us with cyes oflove and wisdom , they
help evo ke our own potential for those qualiti es. Th eir un co ndi-
tional /olJe wishes us happiness and well- beingjllst as we are. This
un co nditi onal acceptan ce then empowers o/lr minds to accept our-
sclves just as we are, freeing us from th e stru ggle o f cryin g to cre-
ate a self th at would feel more acceptable. Wh en o ur self-grasp in g

th ereby rela xes, o ur minds can begin to let go of our fam iliar
frames of reference into a deeper wisdom that se nses th e essential
purity o f eac h aspec t of expe ri e nce as a mani festatio n of pure
awareness.
The power of one person's pure perception to evoke the co rre-
sponding love and wisdom in others, eve n in th e most unlikel y,

mundane situati ons, is beautifully illustrated in a song called " No
Mirrors in M y Nana 's House," composed by Ysaye Barnwell of che
African-America n a cappella group, Sweet Honey in the R oc k. The
so ng is th e recollection of a young gi rlleamin g through her grand-

mother, w ho is clearly her bene£1.ctor, to perceive herself and her
world in a fresh, new light:
There were no mirrors in my Nana's house ...

And th e beauty th:)[ I saw in everythin g,
The beauty in evel)'thing
Was in her eyes.
It was the wise love in her grandmother's eyes that served as her
onl y mirror, w here she saw refl ec ted only her own deep goodn ess
and bea uty:
So I neve r knew that my skin was too black,

I never knew that my nose was too flat,
I never knew that my clothes didn't fit,
And I never kn ew there were things that I'd missed .
And the beauty in everything
Was in her eyes.
The grandm other's house stood in a poor part of [Own in seem ingly
oppressive surroundings. Yet through th e deep co mfort th e girl felt
in that lovin g home, she found herself relaxin g into th e intrinsic

purity and bea uty of all th in gs, beyond worldly labels:
I was intrigued by th e cracks in the walls,

T he dust in the sun looked like snow that wo uld fa ll ,

The noise in the hallway was music to me,
The trash and the mbbish wo uld cushion my feet,

And th e beauty in evel)'thm g
Was in her eyes.
The gra ndmoth er's pure perception as love and wisdom evoked th e
sa me capacity within her granddaughter. By accepting and partici-
patin g in her grandmother's love, th e girl could relax into the fun-
dam ental goodn ess of her experience, her ilUlate wisdom, eve n under
what others wou ld co nsider difficult c irc umsta n ces. ~7 In this way,
pure perception as love and wisdom tends to evo ke th e correspon-
din g pote ntial in others.
The Eguanimity of Wisdom

Grounds the Eguanimity of Love
Previollsly we explored how w isdom and love are emphasized in
different parts of the meditation practice and how they empo wer
eac h o ther. But they don ' t just alternate with one another; they also
cO l1 ta in eac h other. In the heart of th e meditati o n, th e w isdo m of
letting be reveals the nature of experi ence as an infinite expanse of
openness and awa ren ess, all-inclusive, undi vided, and beyond lim-
itation. In t he next part of the meditation, then , the energy of that
fundamental awareness manifests naturally as a loving will th at is all-
in clusive and undivided, wishing th e deep happin ess of bei ngs
beyond limitation. In this way, boundless love is uncovered as a nat-
ural reflex of boundless w isdom itself
Ultimate Equallimity oj Wisdom

Wisdom also reveals the empty, cognizant nature of all experi ence
to be unconditioned and unchanging. For exa mpl e, ocean waves
arise, mani fest, an d dissolve, taking va riou s forms depe ndin g on

changing wea th er conditions. But the essen tial wa teriness of all
th ose waves is never affected by those tran sitory co nditi o ns. Simi-
larl y, th e co ntents of experience Au ctuate in dependence upon
chan ging ci rCUl11st.1 nces, but the essential nature of all those expe-
ri ences never changes. It is always empty cogni za nce. All choughts,
feelin gs, and se nsations are just ephemeral patte rn s of insubstantial

aware ness, like ripples on wate r.
Deepest equani mi ty lies in the re cognition of th e essenti al same-
ness of aU expe ri ences. In the meditation we arc learning to simply
let be in nacural awaren ess. This helps us to recognize and then to
abide in the essence of experi ences, th eir empty cogni zance, rath er
th an reaccing CO the shiftin g contents of experi ences.
Someone may praise yo u or denigrate you. The co ntent of those
two ex peri ences is quite different. Praise may make YO ll feel great;
criticism may make YO ll feel angry. But th e essence of both expe-
ri ences, insubstantial awaren ess, is just th e same. To recognize this
essential sameness is to experience a ve ry deep equ:lI1imi ty.
A small child at the beach may at firs t be afraid of ocean waves, feel-
ing happy about little ones and te nified of big o nes. But with practi ce,
the child ca n become intimate with th e essellfial lIa/llre of all suc h
waves, theiT intrinsic wateri ness. She ca n Ieam to lean into waves, floa t
o n them, dive beneath them , or simply rcst in their essential wa teri -
ness and thereby enjoy them all. Similarly, through the wisdom ofiec-
ting be, we learn that w e don't have to react to th e shifting contenrs
of o ur experi ences but can " lean into" their unchangi ng essence of
knowing emptiness. We can Icc be and find rest directly in that essence.
Such tranquillity, at ease in th e un changin g esse nce of ex peri -
ences, unaffec ted by changing circumstances, is the ulti mate equa-

nimity ch at accompani es th e wisdom in our prac ti ce. Sin ce such
equ animi ty knows directl y the tranq uilli ty of the mind' s natu re,
ullm cdi accd by tho ught, we call it ultimate equanimity.
Relative Kinds oj Equanimity withill Unconditional Love

The ultim ate equanimity of wisdom gro und s two other types of
equanim ity that operate wi th in th e w ish oflove. We could ca ll them
relative types o f equanimity, since [hey are mediated by th o ught-
th e tho ught of love.
The first type is th e impartiality and i"cllIsiVeIle5S of boundless love

that includes all beings eq ually in its wish, with no preference for one
over ochers. The second type of equanimity operative in such love is
freedo m frolll expeaatiolls, from atL.1 chmem to circumstances or our-
comes. Our egos ma y become discouraged w hen we wish so meo ne
who is ill to become well but his condition only worsens over time.
Or Ollr wish for an alcoholic friend to improve hi s li fe ma y turn into
anger when he refuses to improve himself But the unconditional wish
of love co mes from beyond our egos and is not affected by such cir-
cumstances. It wills the well-being of persons no matter what occurs.
The sun do esn 't get discouraged when there are cloud<;; it just keeps
radiatin g regardless. Similarly, ul1conditiol1Jllovej ust keeps radiating
to all, no matter what anyone may think, say, do, or not do.
These two aspects of relative equanimity can be seen as the radi-
ance of ultimate equanimity. Ultimate eq uanimi ty knows that all
beings are the sa me in their essential nature of empty cogni za nce.
Therefore the love that radiates from such wisdom is ill/partial and
a/f-illcllfsille--viewing all beings as the same in their essential good-
ness and need for love. Ultimate equanimity al so knows the
un changing essential nature that underlies the transitory manifesta-
tion of ex pe ri ences. So the love that radiates frol11 such wisdom does
so ul1waverin gly,free if expectations, unaffected by shiftin g circul1l -
st:l.I1 ces or un expected outcomes. Such love is ill/parti(/I, ali-iI/elusive,

3nd free of expectariolls, beca use it is grounded in th e wisdom that
knows the all- inclusive and unconditioned nature of mind. ~~
Wh en so meo ne realizes and embodies such profound eq uani m-
ity, it makes others feel deeply grounded {Q be in his or her presence.

My teacher Geshe Sopa is renow ned for hi s calm perseverance
against secm.ingly insunnountable obstacles. He fi rst came {Q Amer-

ica as a refugee who could barely speak English, although he had
been fa mous in Tibet as a great lama scholar. Over the years he rose
[0 become one of th e most respec ted professors of Buddhist Swdies
in the United States. When he invited H.H . the Dalai Lama to come
to Wisconsin to offer transmissions and teachings new to the West,
many of us couldn 't believe w hat he had taken o n. An incredible
number of preparations had to be made in a very short tim e. Geshe
Sopa cook the responsibility to mortgage a new home with the nec -
essary land for th e event, to quickly constru ct a new templ e, and
provide hOllsin g for thousa nds of people. Many obstacles and prob-
lems cam e up, but he remained un fazed as he qui etl y, consta ntl y
persevered.
Eight years ago Ges he Sopa came to teach in Bosto n. He stayed
in our home and just his simple presence made a profound impres-
sion 0 11 Illy olde r so n J onathan, who was the n six years old. T o th is
day, whenever Barbara and I talk about any Tibetan, Jonathan asks
if we are talkin g about Geshe Sopa. Geshe Sopa was so deepl y
gro unded in wise, lovin g equan imity, th at Jonathan 's memory, eight
years later, is still pulled coward him like memal gravity.
Pure Perception in the "Real World "

Some people ask: " Pure perception that views all as worthy ofl ove
may sound ni ce, but what abou t the real world , where we need co
identify th e people we should hate and fea r becau se th ey mea n us
harm? What am I to tell my you ng daughter- that she's supposed

CO love everyo ne withollt di scrimination ? In th e real world, th at will
. 1la1'111 ' sway. "
put 1ler 111
This qu estio n co ncerns reality and getting in touch with what is
really real. What medita tion reveals to us is intended to help us do

just that. The love that emerges from meditation sho uld not be silly
or na'ive but wise, th at is, fully in touch wi th w ho and w hat people

rea lly are. To be more present to oth ers is not j ust to se nse their
innate dignity but also their various intentions, many of whi ch, as
we've discussed, are t:lr from pure.
By beco ming mo re co nscious thro ugh meditatio n of o ur own

harmfu l sta tes of mind and how they work, we can lea rn to abide in
an attitude of care w hen we co nfron t another person caught in
harmful states of mind. Ou r responses, even to harmful people, are
f.1 r more effecti ve when they express an endurin g ca re fo r persons
th an w hen they just embody th e brittleness of o ur self-centered anx-
ieti es . Indeed, many health professionals, social service providers,
th erapi sts, and poli ce officers have borne witn ess to thi s.
O ne tim e Barbara and I were eatin g in a restaurant in Madi so n,
Wisconsin , w hen a hu ge, drunken man in th e restaurant beca me
belligerent and refused to leave . T wo police offi cers were ca ll ed to
the sce ne. Expecti ng th em to forcefull y co nfro nt and constrain the
large man, I was amazed to watch th em calmly approach him w ith
genu ine co ncern . They spo ke qui etly w ith him for a wh ile abo ut
w hat it was th at he really needed, th en acco mpani ed him o utside in
a mann er o f quiet digni ty. Those police officers met the d runken
man no t w ith th e brittle ego oflegal autho rity but with w ise care fo r
the person they encountered. That attitude made all the di ffe rence
in th ei r effecti ve ness.
The mea ning of th ese meditations clarifies w hen their power
fl ows into o ur li ves over th e course of dail y prac ti ce. The first qu es-
ti o n is no t w hat to tell our children aboJ/t these practi ces but w hat
quality of }JYCSCIICC we embody for our children and o th ers. T o w hat

ex tent are w e a source of patient, un conditional ca re for th ose who
peop le Ollr daily lives? The power of w ise love and equanimi ty that
flows fro m o ur practice w ill info rm every enco unter in subtl e ways,
w heth er we are w ith pleasa nt persons o r diffi cult o nes. As we se nse

tllis, we see how mu ch o ur experience of others has bee n mediated
by our th ou ghts and acti ons all along, and that the sa me pan em is
true for all th e o th ers around us.
Given th at, whi ch is a bener visio n of th e real- the visio n th at
discriminates some persons as worth y of love and many o th ers as
not o r the pure visio n clu t views each bei ng as worthy oflove, how-
eve r lost so me may be in the dark places of their minds? W hich
visio n lets us know mo re of the fulln ess and depth of persons, more
of w hat they reall y are? W hich puts us in better to uch w ith th e real-
ity, thus helpin g us respond to o thers in ways we do n't regre t later?
W hi ch thereby helps us lead a more successful life?
We coul d spec ulate abo ut such questions endl essly, bu t it is more
illumin:l tin g to take up a spiritual prac ti ce th at actu:111y cla ri fies th e
answers by helpin g LI S to live th em. (fth e meditati o ns in thi s boo k
fac ilitate thac, co nsider taking th em up in ea rnest. If they do not,
th en consider findin g a practi ce th at does. N othin g is mo re impo r-
tan t than the fun da mental intent behi nd th e origi nal questi on-how
best to ge t in to uch with realiry and thereby help o ur children and
o th ers do similarly.
6. Com pass ion as a
Liberating Power
HABKAR RTNPOC H E, A DZOGCHEN MASTER ofehe nin etee nch

S century. sa id this to a disciple who declared that he had
realized th e empty nature of phenomena:
Now I have some heart- advice [Q give to you: a sky needs a

SUIl ,a m o th er needs a child , a bird needs two wings. Like-
w ise emptin ess alone is not eno ugh. YOll n eed to ha ve grea t
compassio n for all beings w ho have nO[ realized this empti-
ness-e nemi es, friends, and stran gers. You ne ed to ha ve
compassio n that makes no distinctions between good and
bad. You mu st understand that compassion ari ses thro ugh
m editatio n , not simply from waiting, thinking th at it m ay
come forth by itself from emptiness. ~9
Comp3ssio n is a fOfm a fl ove. Co m passion empathizes with bein gs

in thei r sufferin g while wishing them deep freedo m from it.
To beco me enlightened as the Buddha did is to unify wisdom with
comp3ssion. For wh en the wisdom of empti ness d1w ns, it reveals the
sllbd e C311ses o f suffering in the mind- one's tend ency to grasp on to

self and to all aspens of experience , as if they were substantial enti-
ti es r3ther than empty, transient pattem s of cogni zan ce. And this
dawning wisdom also reveals the sufferin g that all other bein gs, sub-
ject to the sa me grasping tendencies, are undergoing. Sensing in that
way how self and o thers are similar in both th e cau ses of suffering and
the potential for freedom, it becomes natural [0 empathize with them

and wish for their freedom from misery as if it were one's own. in
this way, wisdom empowers compassion for all other beings.
The reverse is also true-boundl ess compassion empowers wis-
dom. For as the boundless quality of compassion emerges- a CO I11-
passion that empath etically reaches Oll t to all other beings in thi s
way- it empowers one's mind to release its narrow fram ework of
ego- ce nte re dn ess for the infinite wisdom beyo nd it, the limitless
exp:lI1se of openness and cogn izance. Thus, Shabkar Rinpo che
declares, a prac titioner who begins to realize the wisdom of cmpti-
ness leam s how to integrate it with boundless compassion in order
[0 rea lize the fulles t potential of enlightenment.
The Significance of Compassion

Buddhists throughout Asia express the signjficance of compassion
through stories, many of which center on Shakyall1 un i Buddha and
his di sciples. One such story co nce rns a remarkabl e woman who
entered the Buddha's spiritual community after discoverin g tremen-
dous co mpassion and wisdom through her own suffering.
Kisa Gotami was a poor village woman who longed desperately
fo r a child of her own. When she finally gave birth to a baby boy,
she was ove~oyed. But while still a toddler, the child became ill and
quickly di ed. Gotami was completely overcome with brrief. Unab le
to accept what had happened, she placed her child's body on her
hip, as if he we re still alive, and wandered from ho use to hOllse
through he r vi llage, despe rately pleading: " Please, give m e medi-

cinc for my son1" At first astonished by her behavior, some villagers
beg.tn mocking her, askin g, "What medicine ca n th ere possibl y be

for the dead , Gotami?"
Finally, an old man took pity on Gotami and told her that there
was a great sage with trem endous, unmatched powers call ed [he
Compassioll as a Libermillg POUler ."¥- I S9
Buddha, w ho was [Caching near their village. "You should go and ask
him," he said. Filled with hope and exci tement, still carrying her
son's dead body, she rushed otT to w here th e Buddha was teaching.
Breathless, she fell before the Buddha and beseeched him, " Please,
blessed one, give me medi cine for my son!" R ecognizin g Cotami's
spirirual potential , the Buddha said, " You did well, Gota mi, to come
here for such medi cine. But first, go back to the vi llage and visit
eve ry house the re. At each house wh ere nobody grieves for the
dead , fetc h mustard seeds. Then return to me with those seeds."
Thinking the Buddha planned to use th e mu stard seeds to co njure
:l cure for her son, Got:l1l1i excitedly returned to th e village. At th e
fi rst hOllse she said, "The Buddha told me to ge t mustard seeds fro l11
every home where no one grieves for the dead. Please give me mus-
tard seeds for my son's medicin e." But th e householder replied,
" Al a<;, Gmami, we gri eve for our li ttl e daughter who di ed last year."
Gotami went to the next house, " Please tell me no one here grieves
for the dead so that I may gather mustard seeds." The man there S<1id,
" Alas, Gmami, we grieve over our dear so n w ho died a few months
ago." At the next house she was told, " Alas, Go tami, we grieve for
our beloved parents."
And so her fruitless search cominu ed until it stru ck her: everyone
in th e village, indeed every living being, und ergoes intense gri eflike
her ow n! In that moment her self-co nce rn ed sorrow transform ed

in to empath y for th e grief that all bein gs experi ence, and her wish
to be free of her personal suffe ring transformed into the wish for all
to be frce. She felt in tense compassion for all bein gs that, j ust like
her. suffer by grasping on to th ings that th ey mu sr inevi tabl y lose. It

dawned on her, " This is w hat the Buddha, in his compassion for all
of us, has seen! " She was now ready to commend her son's body to
th e fun eral pyre and go back to th e Buddha with her new insight.
Upon her reru m the Buddha smi led at her and asked, " Gotami.
have YOll brought me mustard seeds?" "Oh blessed one, I am done
wi th mustard seeds," she replied. ''Just give me refuge." The Buddha

welcomed Gotanu into his conununity of nuns, w here the force of
her compassion fo r all who grasp on to transient things empowered
her to progress rapidly on the libera ting path of insigh t into imper-
manence and sufferin g. 50
Gotam i's story illustrates th e progressive development of co m-
passion . At first, Gotami was self- absorbed in her personal grief and
suffering to th e brink of madn ess . But the practice she received from
th e Buddha revealed her own experi ence as th e doorway to empa -
thy for others. For Gotami to realize th e liberating power of her
own suffe rin g, she had fi rst to expe ri ence it in its full intensity, th en
to recognize in Iter sufferin g w hat so many others we re si mi larl y
und ergoing. "This is what the Buddha has seen!" she exclaimed, for
she had begu n to share in th e Buddha's vision of universal co mpas-
sio l1 . Such co mpassion-knowing bein gs in their C0l11111011 root of
sufferi ng and thcir co mmon pmcntiaJ for freedom from it- naturally
wills freedom equally for them all.
Accordin g co tradition, Gotanu was an exceptional disciple w ho
quickly beca me a leader in the ea rly Buddhist co mmu l1ity. ~l It takes
most of lIS a bit lon ger to reaLze such all-inclusive, wise co mpa ssion,
but we all have th e same potential to do so.
Wh at Is Essential for the

Developm ent of Compassion
H is Holiness the Dalai Lama says two thin gs are essential for such
profou nd and impartial compassion to arise: (I) strong empathy for

beings by sensin g each to be as dear as one's fam ily and (2) deep
insight into the nature of th e sufferin g that all are und e rgoi n g. ~2
Strollg Empathy jor Beillgs that Senses Each as Dear

O n the first point, th e dea rness of beings reveals itself to us through
Compassioll as a Libermillg POUler ."¥- 16 1
ou r practices of th e prior chapters. Such meditatio ns help us se nse

beings throu gh the heart of love (pure perce ptio n) instead of
through th e egocentric judgmen ts of the head (impure perception).
We perceive othcrs' dcarness by attending to theif essential good-
ness, theif holiness beyo nd feduction to anyone's limited labels for
th em . This perception is furth er empowered by refl ectin g on the
kindn ess of b ein gs; how every aspec t of yo ur well- bein g has
depended upo n many others, beyond w hat yo u had noticed. All of
your food , clothing, shelter, possessions, your abilities to read, write,
speak, and reason were all received or lea rned in uner dependence
upon others. Such reflec tion on the implicit kindn ess of ot hers can
become extremely extensive, finally encompassin g all other bein gs
as o ur ultimate field ofbenefacrors. 53
Illsight illto the Nat"" of S"ffering

The Dalai Lam a's second point concerns the need for insight in to
th e nature of suffe ring in order to gene rate auth entic co mpass ion.
The Buddha explained three levels of suffe ring: ohvious suffering,
th e suffering of transicnce, and the suffering of ego-co nditioning. As
we inquire into the levels of suffering, they become progressively
more subtle. O bl/iolls sl!lTerillj? includes th e intense pains and mi seri es
of life th ;'!t normall y COIll C to mind when th e word "sufferin g" is
in voked: seve re illness, violent inju ry, the suffelin gs of dying, dis-
abling grief, an d so forth . Societies tend to think of co mpass ion for
others only when th eir suffering is of this obvious kind. W e tend not
to view others with co mpassion as they expe rience moments o f hap-
pi ness duri ng pleasa nt circumstances. But clin gi ng to such temporal

happ iness is an example of w hat the Buddha identified as (he second
level of sufferin g: th e misery Inherent in relying 011 changeable cir-

cumstan ces for one's happin ess and well- bei ng .
.. AU acc umulations e nd in dispersion; aU risings in L111ings; all
meetil1 b'S in partings; and aU life in death ," said th e Buddha. Within
th e usual stance of self- grasping, the very thj ngs that we clin g to fo r
our happiness-such as wealth, loved o nes, pleasurable possessio ns ,
and personal power-all tra nsfon11 into conditio ns of suffe ring as
we lose them rhro ugholit life and approach o ur dea th. Altho ugh
such thi ngs ca n trigge r transient feelings of happiness. they are no t
i l~ source. The slIffe n"/Ig of rrallsimce is th e fu tile au empt to hold o n
to passin g thin gs as if th ey were th e IIery source o f o ur happiness and
well-bein g, w hen dee p down we know we w ill lose every o ne of
th em . The actual source of well- bein g is th e love, co mpassio n, and
w isdo m that are always availabl e within th e nature of o ur minds.
The ephem eral pleasures of transient sufferin g co me and go with
changin g circumstances. But throu gh spiritual practi ce love, com-
passion, and wisdo m can become enduring po wers that ca n be relied
upon in all circum stances.
The suffe ring of transience takes express io n in til e daily turmoil
of painful feelin gs and emO[ions as we try to fin d security by hold-
in g o n to things, circumst.1.nces. and people--daily anxieties ove r
o bligatio ns. deadlines, and security, fears over how o thers perceive
lIS, oscillating fee lings of inadequa cy, guilt , lo neli ness, lo ngi ng,
annoyance. discouragement, sel f~c e nt e re d pride. and despai r.
The third level of suffering, th e slif]"erillg of ego-amdifiollillg, is th e
basis of th e o th er two levels and the most subtl e. It is th e sufferin g
inh erent in th e mind's constant struggle to establi sh a substantial,

fi xed self that doesn't really exist. It ari ses in th e mo m ent-by-
mo ment crea ti o n of an isolated sense of self that interprets everyone
and everythi ng aro und it as part of its struggle to make itself feel real
and sec ure" Th is level of suffering is th e continual subco nscious anx-

iety that fuels all o ur self-centered reacti o ns.
U ltimate safety and peace are fo und o nly within o ur pri mo rdial
nature, w hen we are at rest in th e un conditi o ned esse nce of o ur
mind, the lumino us empty nature that is intrinsicall y tranq uil. Each
mo ment th at we do n' t reco gn ize that un changi ng nature-a nd
Compassioll as a Libermillg POUler ."¥- 163
identify instead with th e shifting reactions of sclf-centeredness-we

are oppressed by feelings oflonging, anxiety, and fear. It is like being
tossed about by ocean waves instead of restin g un perturbed like the
ocean in its bed, at ease in the unchanging wateriness of all the wavcs.
W e are painfully tossed by our conditioned reactions to experiences,
instead of resting :tt ease in th e un conditioned essence of the expe-
ri ences. As we begin to recognj ze the mind 's innate, tranqu il nature
in meditation, we become co nscious of this third level of sufferin g.
For th en we are able to sense by co ntrast how even an instant of ego-
grasping, by obscuring such inner peacefulness, is a fonl1 of sufferin g.
It is because th e Buddha had insight into all three of th ese levels
of sufferin g th at he had equa l compassion for all bein gs. No t just for
those who are undergoing intense, obvious sufferin g right now but
for all bein gs, even those w ho seemingly enj oy passing moments of
happi ness and for those who ignoran tly see k happi ness by hurting
others. He understood how all are caught in la yers of sufferin g and
ego-conditioning beyo nd w hat they see. Therefore the eyes of the
Buddha see them automatically wi th compassion.
W hen someone becomes enlightened, it is said, just to see a se n-
tient being is to have spontaneous compassion arise from the dep th
of awareness that disce rns the layers of sufferin g operatin g in eac h
being. T he meditati on below helps us gain insi ght into th ose three
h::vels of sufferi ng so our own visio n of beings may be brought closer

to th e Buddha' s.
Becoming Conscious oj Ollr OWl! SI1/erillg

as Doorway to Compassiolljor Others

The Dalai L1111a reconul1ends a clear progression in the culti vation
of compassion:
One thing specific to the contemplation of sufferin g is that

it te nds to be more powerful and effective if we focus on o ur
own suffe rin g and th en extend tha t recogni tion to th e suf-

fe ring of others ... S~
D zogc hen Po nlo p R.inpoche reiterates that progression fro m self ro

other:
Co mp assion mus t start by se nsing our own sufferin g. If it

does no t, th en seein g the sufferin g of others will be merely
co n ce ptual . ~s
T o co nn ect w ith w hat others are going through we have to become

vividly and newly aware o f w hat we ourselves are go in g thro ugh, in
all the layers of our being. If we don't have awareness of o ur own
laye rs of stru ggle and fear and suffering, we ca n't es tablish a clear
co nn ectio n to w hat others are experi encing. To trul y empa th ize
with others, we mu st be able to sense from within the layers of suf-
fe ring that all share. Not j ust in terms of w hat we are currently feel-
ing bu t also on more subtle levels: our personal struggles to hold on
[0 w hat is dear, to maintai n security, to avoid loss and death .
We saw this progression of self-awareness in Kisa Go tamj's story.

It was th e 6nal ackno wledgment of her own grief that transform ed
into compass ion for all others. But Gotami was not so self-aware
when her qu est began. Similarly, man y aspects of our own sufferin g
are hidd en from our vi ew. There are layers of an xiety, pain , and
grief that are suppressed and lost from our co nscio us awa reness
because of ou r ave rsion to such feelings. W e do n' t all ow oursel ves
to beco me conscious of them unless we have a way to do so th at

feels profo un dly safe and healing. Until we have such a way to
become conscious of our suppressed, painful feelings, we can' t sense

th e correspo nding layers of pain in others so as to generate co mpas-
sion for them .
Ltaming to Cradle Our SI1if'rillg with Compassion

We all tend to view our sufferings in a very narrow personal way,
believin g that our experience is unconn ected from th e sufferin g of
all other beings, as if no one else has ever suffered like this before.
By assigning Gotami the " mustard seed" quest, the Buddha helped
her find a safe way co explore her persOlul sufferin g as her con nec-
tion to that of others. Analogously, our practi ce of receiving love
gives us a safe way to become further co nscious of our own suffer-
in g as a basis for co mpass ion. In th e medi[;l{ion below, we are
instructed CO receive loving compassion into eac h aspect of our suf-
fering. T o cradl e eac h layer in such healing energy gives ou r minds
perm ission CO become conscious of furth er, more subtl e layers. As
we sense the si milarity of self and others in such layers, it beco mes
na[Ural co ex tend loving compassIOn to th em as well. Through this
prac tice. we lea rn to se nse the underlyi ng traces of anxiety and grief
that shadow beings even during thei r moments of pleasure, and to
hold them in the co mpa ssion that wills their deep freedom. As
occurred for Gmami, eventually it ca n dawn on us, This is what the
Buddha, in his compass ion for all, has seen!
M editation: Realizing Wise Compassion

Part 1: Receiving the Radiallt BleSSing oj Compassioll
Sit in a relaxed way. Recall your benefactors, including

inspiring spiritual figures such as the Buddha. Envision th em
above yo u and just behind. They are se nding yo u love in th e

form of co mpassion , the radiant wish for YOll to have deep-
est freedom from suffering. Bath e in th e lovi ng energy of

rhat wish . R eceive its healin g wamlth inro every layer of
yo ur sufferin g, gradually step by step.
R eceive the genrle radiance of compassion into phys ical
pains, Ic ttin g all such areas of tension relax under its healing
warmth .
Bring [0 mind dail y anxieties abo ut how you are go ing [0
survive or meet all obligations. Sense what it's like for so me-
o ne to und ergo such anxieties, then receive the heali ng
energy o f co mpassion into those feelings.
Expe ri ence yo ur worries over finances, empl oy ment,
sec urity, or health. Sense what it's lik e for som eo ne to
und ergo such anxieti es, and receive th e ge ntl e radi ance of
compassio n into them.
Experie nce your fears over what others think of yo u and
receive co mpassio n into those visce ral feelin gs.
In a similar way, step by step, receive your benefactors '
radi ant compassion into:
feelin gs of self-do ubt or inadequacy;

feeli ngs of sadness or guilt;
feelings of loneliness or loss;
feeli ngs of anger or betrayal;
feelings of despair o r hopelessness;
feelin gs of addiction;
your longin gs or sense of incompleteness.
Sense what it's like fo r someone to undergo such feelings, th en

cradle each one in the soft, healing energy of co mpassion.
Bring to mind your fears of severe illness, injury, pain, or
dea th , and receive co mpassion into th ose anxieti es. Bring [0

mind fears yo u have fo r your loved ones and pets in their
vulnerability and mo rtali ty, and receive co mpass io n into

those feelings.
R eceive th e ge ntle radiance of co mpassion into yo ur

ilUllost patterns of grasping to self, of trying to hold on to
anythin g at all .
Finally, relinquish the visllaliL1tion and tOL111y surrender to
loving compassion by merging into oneness with the radi-
ance and rel easin g all fram es of reference. Experience lumi-
nous wholeness, beyond separation of self and others, deeply
lettin g all b e.
Part 2: Letting Be in Natural Awareness
Let all bodil y se nsa tion s settl e natura ll y in th eir own way.
Surrender to the natural power of the body and feel it
embody you. Let the breath come under its own natural
power, brea thing you. R.elease all grasping on to tho ughts of
past, present, or future, permi n ing thoughts and sensations
to arise and dissol ve under their own power. Thus let th e
mind fall totally open-at ease, unrestricted, free of foc us,
all- pervasive, wi th the gaze of your eyes totally expansive.
Let aU be j ust as it is in complete openness and acceptance.
Sens e th e openne ss of awareness, boundless and without

center, in whi ch thoughts and sensa tions self- arise and self-
dissol ve- beyo nd thinking, beyond reference poines, infi-
ni te o pen ness and tran slu ce nt awareness, pervasive like th e
sky. Let th.is vas t expanse sense all that arises as its own radi-
ant expression. R est as that sky-like nature of mind-all phe-
nomena all owed to self- ari se and self- rel ease within th e
infinite expanse of openn ess awarc.
Part 3: Extwdillg Radiallt Compassioll
Afcer some time, recall your benefactors, including deeply

spiriUlal figures. Envision them behind you and just above,
sending you love in the fonn of compassion, th e radiant wish
for you to have deepest fTeedom from suffering. Bathe in the
compassionate energy of that wish. Iteccive its heali ng radi-
an ce like a ge ntl e shower into every part of your mind and
body, from head to toe. Join your benefactors in th eir wish for
yo u: " M ay this one have deepest freedo m from suffe rin g."
Mentall y repeat that wish for yo urself as you receive th e heal-
ing energy even more deeply into your body and mind .
Now envisio n several beings that arc dear to you in front.

While receivin g yo ur benefactors' radiant wish from behind,
let th e ra diance co me throu gh you to the belo ved ones
before yo u, sensi ng th eir layers of sufferin g as si mil ar to your
OWIl. R epea t the wish of compassion in your mind w hile
radiatin g its healing energy to those in fro nt ofyoll: " Ma y

th ey have deepes t freedom from sufferin g." Gradua ll y, at
yo ur own pace, extend that radiant wish to marc dea r ones
in front , illumining th eir bodies and minds with its compas-

sionate energy.
Now, e nvision several strangers in front along with th e dea r

ones, se nsing them as similar to you in their layers of suffer-
ing. Let th e radiance from your benefa ctors come through

yo u to th em w hile repea ting th e wish of compassio n for
them in your mind: " May they have deepest freedom from
sufferin g." Trust this wish more than yo ur thou ght of th em
as "stran ge rs" whil e illumining th em with its compass ionate

energy. At your ow n pace, extend that radiant wish si milarly
to m ore strangers in front, bathin g them completely in its
compa ssionate energy.
Now, along with th e dea r ones and stran gers, envision sev-
eral people you have di sliked, hated, or wanted to avoid.
Sense them as similar to you in th eir layers of suffering and
their wish to be free of it. Let the radiance come through
you to th e m while repeating th e wis h of co mpass ion fo r
them: " May they have deepest freedom from sufferin g."
Trust this wish more than your thought of them as dislikable,
illumining them with its compassionate encrgy. At your own
pace, exte nd th e wish simjlarly to more and more peo ple
you have disliked, hated , or wamed to avoid.
Now i //lag i lie t"at th e 111111;11 0115 field of beliefactors be" illd YOIf
lI1 er,{!es (ompletely illfO ),ollr heart. Sense the compassionate
energy radiatin g from yo ur heart as one with all yo ur bene-
f.1ctOrs and one with all enlightened beings and your spiritual
teachers. Let your heart, un ified with all those benef.:1ctors,

radiace boundlessly to sentient beings like th e sun , in all
direc tions at once. R epeating the wish of compass ion, bathe
all bein gs w ith its energy whi le comm uning hea rt to heart
with th em : "May eac h being have deepest freedom frol11 suf-

fering. " Le t the energy of that wish overwhelm any remain-
ing inhibitions yo u may have, radiating out spontaneously

and all- inclusi vely, as if a buddha in your heart we re radiat-
ing through you to all bein gs a[ once, evokin g [hei r deepes[
freedom in th e nature of their minds.
After so me time, drop the visualization and j ust let go into

one ness w ith that compassionate, insubstantial radiance.
R elease all fram es of reference into boundless openn ess and
translu cent awareness, pervasive like th e sky-beyo nd any
thought of separation. Rest thus, at ease, co mple[C.
Part 4: Dedicatillg the Liberatillg Power jor All
Feel th e power of this practice to pull you beyond sel f-

gras ping patterns of suffering and to open YO ll toward th e
deep tranquillity and goodness of your inmost being. Prayer-
fu lly dedicate all such spiritual power to th e deepest well-
being and liberation of all beings, each like yo u in needing
and wanti ng such joy and freedom.
Tips for Progressing in the Meditation

of Compassio n and Wisdom
Focus First 011 Reuivillg Compassion and 1.£ltillg Be ill Natural Awarl.'lItss
To receive th e compassion of spiritual bene£:1cto rs, including
enli gh[Cned bein gs, is profoundly healin g for o ur minds. Bm it is
also mu ch morc. Ir Icts our basic goodness co nU11uni catc w ith thcirs ,
and thus to awaken. To merge w ith benef.1c tors and sense th eir
compassio nate energy as ou r own is to discover th eir budd ha nature
as undivided from our own and to begin to unl eash its spontaneo us
energies. Finally, to di sso lve into o neness with that empty radian ce,
beyond reference points, is to join o ur spiritual benef.1crors in the

infinite gro und of compassion and wisdom they have realized, the
nature of mind. In th is way, by receiving our benet:1crors' blessing

we are lea rnin g, like th em , to unleash th e li berating power of
enli ghtenment from the ground of our bein g.
Explore thi s compassion and w isdom mediration at your OW11 rate
of progress. R emember that your field of bcncfactors incl ud es

enlightened beings, whose wish of compassion is co ntinuous,
un conditi onal. and all-inclusive. You are always included in th eir
wish. no maH er whar. During the initial wee ks of daily practice,
focus on th e first two parts of the meditation as follows: first take
tim e to receil/e th e li ght of yo ur benefa ctors' compassion b'Tadu ally
into all laye rs of your suffering, then merge into oneness wi th that
radian ce, and relax into natural awaren ess beyond reference points,
the seco nd part of th e meditation.
Some people say they are afrai d to pay so mu ch attention to
their own sutTering. But that's because th ey are focusin g o n th e
sufferi ng alone , di vo rced from the compassion. For many o f us,
before ente ring into this meditation , to becom e conscio us of our
suffering implied feeling isolated from o th ers in o ur persona l pain ;
to feel terribl y alone. But that is l/Ot how thi s medita tio n takes us
into our suffering. In this meditation (lie leam how to experiellce 511f-
ferillg while cra dl;1I,R it ;11 the ligh t of cOIII]1a55;0I1. This trallsforms th e
expe rience. because the compassionate e nergy we rec eive is so
deeply heal ing.
Therefore, it is important to focu s on receifJill,R the healin g rays of
compassion into eac h layer of your suffering and anxi ety. Don't just
focus 011 YOllr feelings of distress alone, as if unrelated to that receiv-
ing. The ene rgy of compassion helps heal parts of ourselves we had
not previously acknowl edged, so we can become newly conscious
of them.
There is no need to rush th e process. We are enabl ed to beco me
more conscious offee bn gs of pain, fear, and despair as we se nse the

safe, heali ng power of the unconditional can: in w hich they are held.
Let eac h sllch feeling come to rest in the gentle, healing wa mlth of
lovin g co mpa ssion from your benefactors. By grad uall y sensing
more layers of suffering in that way, you are sensing similar layers in
others, whi ch empowers empathy for th em .
By receivin g co mpassio n into eac h aspect of o ur sufferin g as

instructed, we becom e increasingly aware of all th ree levels of suf-
fe rin g that we re ex plained abo ve. These are the obvious sufferilll!.S of
body and mind, the sl!lferillgs of tfllIISiCIICC, whi ch includc fears ,
lo ngings, and rese ntments evoked by clinging to transient things
for our happiness, and th e Sl~fferil1g of ego-col1ditiollillg, whic h is the
mi se ry inherent in grasping on to a narrow self and its fram es of
reference. To beco me conscious of those three levels of sufferin g
ma kes us aware of similar levels in oth ers, empowerin g o ur co m-
pass io n for th em.
In each such session, receive the healing energy of co mpassion
inw all th e layers of your suffering for ten or twe nty minutes, then
release into oneness with that radiance, and relax into the wisdom
of natliral awareness, th e second part of the meditati o n. T hen, after
some tim e, just dedi cate the liberating powe r of th e prac tice.
When Ready, Extend Compassion ProgresSively

After a few weeks focusing in that way on th e fi rst two parts of the
medi tatio n, you can add the third part of the meditation and begin
extendin g the w ish of compassion as instruc ted. When yo u have
truly famili arized yourse lf with your own layers of sufferin g, it
becomcs absolmeiy natural to empathize with others in their simi-
lar la yers of difficulty and to exte nd co mpassio n to th em. Fo r sev-

eral wee ks, radiate compassion in each session to dear ones in
w idenin g c ircles, th en merge with your benef.1ctors, radiate to all
beings, and dedicate the liberating power. After a few more weeks,
w hen co mpassion for many dea r o nes feels stro ng, YO LI can extend
it in each session also to strangers in w idening circles, then merge
with yo ur benet:1ctors, radiate to all beings, and dedica te. After sev-
eralmo re weeks, w hen compassion for many stra ngers feels strong,
extend compassion in each session also to disliked o nes before merg-
in g with be net:1 ctors, radiatin g to all, and dedica tin g.
Whm Familiar w ith Compassion) Alternate It with Meditatioll 011 Love

After yo u have become f.l nooar with the meditation of compass ion,
you can altemate it with the meditation of love from chapter 5-
mornin g meditation on the one, evening meditation on th e other.
Or you can practice the love meditation daily for a month, then
practice th e compassion meditation for a 111onth. By altern atin g in
this way, eac h practice continues to inform and empowe r the other.
Love, compassion, and wisdom grow increasin gly deep and strong,
graduall y affectin g your life, relationships, and work in th e world .
Discovering Kisa Gotami's Story as Our Own

Over time, th ro ugh such practice, we discove r Kisa Cmami's story
as similar to o ur own. How this intuitive understanding ca n arise is
beautifu lly illustrated in a letter written to a literary j ournal by a
yo un g mo th er descri bing a day in the hospi tal with her child,
R obert, who is gravely ill wi th leukemia.
" { awaken," she says, "as a nurse en ters my fo ur-year-old son's
hospital room to check his tubin g and vital signs.... Afte r fourteen
days in the hospital, I have somehow pu t aside the disbelief that this
is happenin g to my child." The un certain outco me of R obert's
treatment rivets th e mother's attenrion on each fresh moment with
her so n, as th ey play together with pu zzles, sit togeth er in th e hos-

pital tuli p garden, joke, color pictures, listen to musi c. Later, as
R o bert naps, she wa nders dow n to the cafeteria w hile prayin g
silentl y: " I have learned to pray in my head w hile walkin g. I don't
blame Go d fo r having let Robert get leuk emia, but I do believe

God can decide how much longer R obert will live, and this is the
focus of my prayer. At the start of the walk, I wan t R obert to li ve

to be an old man. If not that, I at least wa nt to see him grow up , ge t
married, and have children. I want to see w hat he will look like as
a teenager. I've had four years with him; I Wan[ four more. I want
at least o ne mo re year-one more Christmas, o ne mo re birthday. I

wa nt to bri ng h im ho me one more tim e, away fro m nu rses and
spinal taps and IV tubes. By th e time I fin ish prayin g, the hall has
become very narrow. Then the tho ught co mes to me: At least we
have fwd (!tis day. This day oflaughing and playi ng and mu sic and
sunshi ne 0 11 tu lips. If Rob ert di ed tom o rrow, I would be abl e to
remember every minute of thi s day fo r the rest of my life and take
pleasure in it. Some children are kill ed by cars, and their moth ers
never get to say goo dbye. Some infan ts di e sudd enly and th eir
mo thers never scc thcm grow and laugh. Somc mothers arc too busy
or burdened to spend an entire day with th eir child, just playing. I
reali ze that I a111 o ne of th e lucky ones.".'.6
H er silent prayer began in desperati o n, clinging to rhe visio n of
th e life w ith her son she had assumed she w ould have. But as her
prayer progressed, her hea rtbrea k transfo rm ed in to gratitude and
empathy-gra titude fo r every moment of life now perceived as
sacred and e mpath y for all mo thers w ho must lose thei r children .
The medi tatio n of compassion and w isdo m enters us upo n a sim-
ila r journ ey of awakening. Throu gh progressive practi ce, we dis-
cover that o ur suffe ring is not just a personal problem . It need no t
isolate us fr0111 o th ers into narrow confines of personal pain . W e
ca n rediscover th e meanin g of our own sufferin g as a profo und con-
nectio n to countless others and to the dignity and sacredn ess of all
our lives.
Compass ion Must Be Grounded in Wisdom

to Be a Liberating Fotce
The Dalai Lama no tes:
As we recogni ze that the basis of misery is mistaken percep-

{io n, this mistaken grasping at a no nexistent self, we sec that
sufferin g ca n be eliminated .... Knowing that people's suf-

fering is avoidable, that it is surmountable, our sympathy for
th eir inability to extrica te themselves leads to a more pow-
erful compassion. Otherwise, thou gh our co mpassion may
be strong, it is likely to have a quality of hopelessness, eve n
."
despalr.
Compassion w ishes beings to be free from thei r sufferin g. If we

don't rea ll y beli eve th at th ey can be free-that deep freedom , sec u-
rity, well- bein g, and joy is a real human possibili ty- our co mpassion
tends to lapse into despair. Then it is not a libera tin g force for any-
one. Co mpassion beco mes a libera tin g force w hen we kllow the
freedom that it wishes for beings to be real.
This is w hy practices of wisdom were introduced ea rly in this
book. It is the wisdom of natural awareness that knows sllch freedom
to be real. Even as begin ners, our wisdom is empowered as each part
of the meditation helps li S leam to release our self-grasping and come
to rest in the natural opennes of awareness beyond reference points.
There we ca n sense th e possibility of a freedom beyond personal suf-
fering, a dimension of deep safety, nirvanic peace, previollsly hid-
den by ego-centered thou ghts.
It is as thou gh we had been reacting to fri ghtening projec ti ons on
l movie sc ree n . But w hen we turn our anention blck toward th e

movie proj ector, we see th e tranquil source of the projection s: th e
empty radiance that Ollr own minds had solidified into frig htening
fOfms.
Simil arly, through the meditation, we lea rn to recognize th e

peaceful esse nce of ou r shifting thoughts and sensations, their
un chan gin g nature of empty cogni za nce. When we sense such

peace in the radiant essence of awa reness, we also se nse how
ephemeral are the ego- centered panerns of thought that had dri ve n
our personal sufferin g. All such pattern s are empty of substan ce and,
w hen recogni zed as such, need not bind our minds. Amazed, we
se nse that a deep, inner freedom from personal suffering;s possible.
We call realize th e kind of freedom th at the Buddha spo ke of and
so ca n others around us. Then our compassio n, our wish for their
freedom, is imbued with real co nfide nce and power. Such CO I11-
passion doesn't just share the sorrow of bei ngs in th eir sufferin g. It
is also a resolute will an d liberating energy that co mmun es with
others at the level of their deepest freedolll. And it is joy at partic-
ipatin g in th eir freedom now.
Three Levels of Compassioll

According to Indian and T ibetan Buddhist maste rs, as insight into
the nature of suffering deepens in practice, three levels of compas-
sio n progress ively emerge on the path of en.li ghtenl11cnt.
They are: ( I) co mpassion that views the obvious suffering of
bei ngs, (2) co mpassion that se nses beings in their impem1anence,
and (3) compassion tha t knows th e nature of mind. T he first level is
compassion that empathizes with beings in their obvious sufferings ,
willing thcm to be freed from sti ch intense misery. The second level
is compassion th at senses how they Stiffer by grasping on to tran-
sient thin gs for an ep hem eral self, will in g th em to be freed from
sti ch grasping. T he thi rd level is compassio n that recognizes th e infi -
nite , un changin g natu re of mind and unders tands th e suffe rin g

inh erent in the lack of such recognition. At thi s third level, when a
practi ti oner rests in that unconditioned nature of mind beyond the
turmoil of self- graspi ng, a spontaneous will and energy of compas-
sion radia tes to all w ho have not yet fo und such safety in dl e nature
of their minds. This is nonconceptual compassion, a natural refl ex
of deep wisdom. SII

The following quoces beau tifully express this third level, in which
compassion and wisdom are spontaneously united.
As Nyoshul Kh enpo explained:
W he n you realize the true nature of thjn gs, how ca n you

no t have incredible spontaneous compassio n for all those
w ho don't reali ze it? .. Everywhere th at suffering and delu-
sio n ari se, com passion arises fO release and allev iate beings
suffering from th at delu sion . That is the spo nta neo us out-
fl ow of th e genuin e rea lization of th e true n:lturc. S9
And as Dilgo Kh ye ntse Rinpoche taught:
The so urce of all phenomena of samsara and nirvana

Is th e nature of mind-vo id, lumjnous,
All -e ncompassing, vast as the sky.
Whe n in that state of skylike vastness,

R elax in to its openness; stay in that very openness,
M erge w ith that skylike state:
Natura lly, it w ill beco me more and more relaxed-
Wonderflll!
If you becom e accomplished

In this method of integratin g min d with view,
Your rea li zatio n w ill natu rally become vase.
Andjust as th e sun shin es freel y throughout space,

Your compassio n ca nnot fail to sh ine on all unrea lized
beings. 60
Nyoshul Kh enpo and Kh yen tse R..inpoch e were two of the mos t
revered Buddhist masters of the twentieth century. But th e w ise
compassio n they realized is avaIlable to us all , if we proceed with

diligence at our own rate of progress.
Wise Compassion as a Liberating Power in the World
As compassion deepens through its three levels, it becomes a real

liberating power for the world. This is so in seve ral ways.
On th e relati ve level, sllch compassion is th e stron g wish fo r
bein gs to be freed from sufferin g; the wish that kn ows th eir poten-
ti al for such freedom to be real, whateve r anyo ne ma y think of
themselves or others. To be prese nt to others wi thin that attitude is
to hold th em in th e comforting energy of compassio n, helpi ng to
ease their troubled minds. It is to listen deeply and to respond to the
basic dignity of bein gs that worl dly gossip doesn' t ackn owledge.
Co mpassio n that kn ows beings in all levels of th eir suffering
motivates service for them on all levels of the ir need. Such service
is no t easily d isco uraged at disa ppointing temporal OLHco mes,
beca use it holds others in th eir deepest potential offreedom , w hich
is always prese nt. In th e course o f such service, compassion also
opens one's own mind to furth er qualities of awakenin g that ben-
efit others by inspiration and example: joy in the meaningfulness of
human life, reve rence for each person, patience with self and oth-
ers, gratitude, enthusiasti c perseverance, and stability of mind in
loving compassion.
O n the ulti mate level, to abide in th e very gro un d of co mpas-
sion , the sky-like nature of mind, is to commu ne with others in

thei r prim ordial freedom , beyond du alism , beyond customary
thinki ng, subliminally evoking their potential to awaken similarly.
It is to resona te with their inmost nature of freedol11, blessing them
to co me to thei r own recogn ition of it. It is to touch th em in their

hearts. Indeed, this is what our spiritual benef.1c to rs, enli ghtened
bein gs, have been doing fo r LIS, long before we noticed. T heir awak-
ened budd ha nature has communed with O llT own, blessi ng it to
awak en sim.ilarl y- to actuali ze itself in co mpassionate energy and
service to others.
COlllpassioll COllfirlll' the Digllity of Beillg' While COllfroll tillg Their

Haruiflll lllldmcies
Some people think of themsel ves as compassionate because th ey
aJways try to s..1Y and do what confinns others in their self-S.c1tisf.1ction.
But that is not co mpassion. It is just an attempt to get along with
everyo ne. Others feel th ey should not have compassion for every-
one becau se political opponents and perpetrato rs of injusti ce shou ld
be co nfronted, justifyi ng hatred for their opponents as the necessary
motivation for confronting them.
Wise co mpassion reverences the inner worth of every single
person. But it also sees into the layers of their suffering, including
th e suffe rin g they crea te for th emselves and others thro ugh ego-
ce ntered thought and action. Wise compassion confirms the intrin-
sic di gnity of perso ns even w hen it confronts th e harmful ways that
they think and ac t. Such compassion challenges people in th eir ego-
ce nte redness while upholding their fundamental goodn ess.
Some of our most profou nd benef.1.c tors are those w ho are wiLl-
ing, o ut of compassion , to become objects of our anger in order to
chall enge us to be better people. They do so because th ey see in us
both the positive and negative aspects that we ha ve not ye t acknowl-
edged. And th ey have the courage of compassion to confront our
harmful tendencies, so OUf positive potential call emerge.
Bankei , a se ventee nth-century Japan ese Zen master, was

renown ed for his compassion toward the masses. O ne day a grollp
of beggars who suffered from leprosy came to him for refll ge.
Banke i admitted th em into his community, washin g and shavin g
th eir heads with his own hands. One of Bankei's devo ut di sci-
ples, upse t to see his master put himself at risk by placi ng his hands
o n th e lepers, ran to Bankei WIth J basi n of wa ter and o ffered to

wash hi s hands. Bankei , fixi ng his disciple in J steel y gaze, refu sed
the wa ter and said, " Your di sgust for them is filthi er than their
sores."61
It wou ld be wrong to think Bankei had co mpassio n fo r the lep-

ers but not for his disci ple. Differing circumstances called forth dif-
f~rent expressions of th e same compassion. Bank ~ i 's kindm."'Ss [Oward
th e lepers co nfirmed their worth, despite society's revulsion for
them. And by confronting his discipJt:'s rev ulsion for the lepers,
Bankei pointed him to a better object for his revulsion- th e self-
clinging rea ctivity of his own mind. H e exposed his di sciple [0 his
own sa msa ri c map of others, so he could learn [0 ign o re it and man-
ifest hi s own potentia l for all- inclusive compassio n.
In thi s way, wise compassion confirms the inner worth of beings
even when it confronts their harnlful patterns of self-centeredness.
It co nfirms what should be confirmed and co nfro nts what sho uld be
confronted, without ignoring one for the o ther.
Compassioll alld Social Servia

Such compassio n greatly empowers any work we may do in social
service or activism. It keeps our mind on realities that transcend o ur
own self-cen teredness, so our best intentions can be reali zed instead
of bei ng overwhelmed by our emotional reactions to t:,llible people
and disappointing outcomes.
People who work in social service or acti vism come [0 retrea ts
and workshops where I teac h th ese meditations. T hey ask how to
avoid burnout in th eir work. Many feel emotionally ex hausted and

embittered by diffi culties with clients and co-work ers, disappoint-
ing results, or obstacles from vested interests. To w hatever degree
ego- centered ness is mixed in[O o ur moti vatio n to help others, I tell
them, we identify with the ego's reactions to all such diffi culti es and
become exhausted and bitter. It is our own self-centered reactions
that burn us out. We are not co nscious of the subtl eties of o ur self-
ce ntered ness because they are hidden and cOll ched wi thin Ollr desire
to be a big help to others. Within such a mixed mo ti vatio n, we
don ' t just wish for others' well-being; we also want Sll ccess in ollr
way of helping th em , and we wane gratitu de from others to co nfi rm

o ur image as th eir good helper. When such expec tat ions are no t
met, we becom e cy nical or bitter and get tired of the work.
The meditati ons of these chapters undercm th e subconscious ways
we clin g to identi fyi ng o urselves as "helpers," by evoki ng a more
endurin g ca re for persons that transcends sll ch self-ce mcred con-
cern . The powe r of unconditional ca re helps ca rry lIS beyo nd the
limitations of th e ego that reac ts with fru strati on and impati ence
w hen f.1ced w ith temporary f.1ilure, se tback, or lack of appreciati on.
Many who have practiced th ese meditations with me in rece nt
years say th at th e practi ce has empowered th eir se rvi ce to oth ers
beyond measu re, reinforci ng and strength enin g th eir basic in te n-
tion to serve. Kathy directs an urban soup kitchen for homeless peo-
ple, serves hund reds of people from th e streets of Boston, and has
tra ined dozens of peopJe in service to thcm . Terry does chaplai ncy
work in a maximum security prison with inmates w hose li ves arc
de fin ed by the violent abuse th ey have given and received . Jaymati,
a psychotherapist, has counseled clients overco me by self- hatred and
self- inflicted wounds. C had, a social worker, has co unseled inncr-
city kids from violent, g<lI1g-infested neighborhoods. Ana has ta ught
in a school for emorionally disturbed children who have never expe-
ri enced a supp orti ve family life. Julie tcac hes coUege stud ents with
severe learning disabilities, many of whom feel like co mpl ete f.1ilures
in th eir li ves.
All th ese ca re providers know how hard and ex hau stin g such
work becomes if the caregive r is immersed in his or her personal reac-
tions to pro blems and di ffic ult behaviors of cliel1[S or co-wo rkers. So
each has lea rn ed increasin gly to rely upon the powe r of wisdom ,
un conditional love, and compassion th at flows fro m dai ly medita-

ri on . This gives th em a powe r of endurin g co nn ec ti o n [Q their
clients and co- wo rkers, no matter ho w little appreciatio n they
receive or w hat may occur in a parti cular day. Th ey have learn ed
how to hold their clients in the vision of th eir positive potenti al,
co nfinning their essential goodness, eve n w hen co nfronting th eir
clients' hanllful behaviors or limiting th oughts of th emselves and
others.
As daily meditation brings out the power of wisdom , loving COI11-
passion , and equanimity from beyond o ur egos, we can lea rn to
recall and draw upon it throughout o ur day, ex tendin g compassion
to o th ers no matter w hat they think or do, w hether or not our ow n
temporal goa ls are accomplished. To reca ll th e meditati on during
ollr workday helps keep us focused on our fundamental care fo r per-
sons, instead of ex haustin g our energy in th e tiring reactions of our
egos. In thi s way, little by little, th e wisdom and energy of compas-
sio n, beyond emotional exhaustion, empowers all ollr work.
Compassioll alld Social Activism

Social activism brings lip further issues. Agents of social change cam-
paign (or and aga inst social policies, w hi ch brings them into dis-
agreement with those w ho ca mpai gn for the other side. Man y
aSSum e that [0 take a stand against political opponen ts requires us to
hate and vilify them, which is w hy mu ch public disco urse q uickJy
becomes so vic io us and polarized. But detes ting one's opponents
o nly inhibits social consensus, leaving us emo ti o nally ex hausted and
sick inside (rom ollr own anger. H ate, eve n w hen promulgated in
th e nam e of th e publi c good, alienates us from Ollr better selves and
from ot hers, often driving away the very people that we seek to
attra ct to our cause.
Ie is mo re effec tive to cultivate the love and co mpassion that

senses others as like oneself, both in their essential goodness and in
rheir self-centered tend enCIes. By maintainin g humility in th at

knowledge we ca n co nfiml the di gnity of Ollr oppo nents as equal
to our ow n , eve n w hen we confront theif positions on importan[
Issues.
My wife, Barbara, models this sort of atti cude for me. A few years
ago a bitter political issue di vided our tow n. Many citizens believed
that th e town sc hools were in desperate need of money to rebuild
dilapidated buildings. To do this , they argued, local taxes had to be
raised . Many others strongly disagreed, argu in g that ra isin g taxes
wou ld harm those on limited incomes and set a bad precedent for
future budge tary problems. Th e iss ue headed for a vote. Barbara
j oined:1 mo ve ment to get out the yes vote for rai sin g taxes. Elec-
tion day :1rrived, an d Barbara stood holding:1 " Yes!" sign at a spot
in the ce nter of town. Nearby was an oldcr man , well known in the
town , who m she hadn ' t previously met. The m:1n h:1d w ritten sev-
er:1l strongly worded letters to town newspapers criti cizin g th e pro-
posal to raise taxes. He stood next to her holding a sign th:1t read,
"No!" They shared that comer for hours.
Barbara and the ge ntl eman commiserated with each other ove r
th e ri gors of political ca mpaigning in chiUy weath er. They ente r-
tai ned eac h other with conversation throughout th e day. O ccasion-
ally, someone drove by and shouted a rude comm en t abou t either
th e " Yes!" or " No!" people, provoking Barbara and her neighbor
to discuss the importa nce of respect. Each enj oyed discovering and
co mmunin g with th e other's humani ty that day, even as each
rcmained firm in opposing the other's political stand. Such mutu al
res pec t, on a il e co rner in the center of taWil, helped an chor th e

political process in w hich the whole town was participating.
But w hat if you are working on behalf of victims of inj ustice and
abuse ? "Surely," ma ny have argued, " hatred for those who harm
others is a good mo ti vatio n for opposing them ." Wait a minute.

R ecall how the map of " friend," "stranger," and "enemy" has held
everyone in bondage. People who oppress or abuse oth ers conceive

of rh em merely as "strangers" w ho don ' r marrer or as "enelll_ies" to
be hated as nothing but evil. So th ey often justify their abuse as a
social good. For us , in tllm , to conceive of the abusers as "enemi es"
who are not fully human, deserving only of hatred and abuse, rein-
forces the fundamental error that they arc caught in . We don't want
[Q wind up joining them in the name of opposin g th em.
The practi ces of wisdom, unconditional love, and compassion
give us a way out of this viciolls cycle. Our meditations help LI S rec-
ognize how mu ch we share with abusers, in OUf thoughts if not our
physical actions, and also to recognize the potential for good that is
within all persons. Knowing w hat is real, th e essential sa meness of
sel f and oth ers, co mpassio n can respond realistically by co nfronting
the evil in persons and confirming the potential for good in them.
Self- righteous hatred, because it is out of [Quch with reality in its
deluded projections of others, is powerless to do anythin g but evoke
furrher evil from them. That's because self-righteous hatred itself is
part of th e dynamic of evil-a self-centered reaction [Q one's own
redu ctive thought of others.
Oppressed people suffer from abuse. Those who abuse th em suf-
fer from fear in their fruitless, deluded attempt to ac hi eve secure
well-bei ng through actions that harm many others. When compas-
sion moti va tes social action, it holds both th e "oppressed" and the
"oppressor" in its care, seeking freedom fo r both from actions that
hold both in bondage ro suffering.
T he Ca tholi c acti vist Thomas Merton expressed thi s principle
well , using the th eological language of his tradition:
The saints are what they arc, not because their san ctity mak es
them admirable to others, but because th e gift of sainthood
mak es it poss ible fo r them to admire everybody else. It gives

them a clarity of compassion that ca n find good in th e most
terrible criminals. It delivers them from {he burden ofj udg-

ing oth ers, condemning other men. It teaches them to bring
the good out of others by compassion, mercy and pardon. A
man becomes a saint not by conviction th:lt he is better than
sinners but by the realization that he is one of th em, and that

all together need the mercy ofCod.(ol
To wa ke lip to our enlightened potential is [0 relinquish th e bur-

den of mistakin g others for Ollr reductive judgments of them, since
we kn ow how much suffering has followed from that mi sL1 ke. Then
we recogn ize how all others have mad e the sam e mista ke and have
suffered for it. To know that is to know that all deselve co mpassion,
and that aUf own self- righteousness wasjust a delusion . Then strong
action against injustice can be taken for thc sake of aU.
Letting Meditation and

Daily Life Inform Each Other
Responding to tbe World witb New Eyes of Compassion
As we practice this meditation of compassion and natural wisdom
eac h day, it affects our perception of the wo rld . These days, as I
wr ite, th ousands of people in th e world arc overco me by ra ge,
swea rin g themselves ro th e painful death of th eir encmi es. Dozens
of Iraqis are m aimed and killed each day by sui cide bombers w ho
think sti ch slau ghter is th eir path to heaven. Millions in th e Sudan
have been heartlessly uprooted from their villages by brtltal attacks,
hundreds of th ousa nds dying from violen ce, hun ge r, and di sease.
Millions of laborers, including child ren, work sti ch long hours on
farms and in f.1ctories for so little pay that they barely survive. Fam-
ilies all over the world are overwhelmed by the need to su pport rel-
ati ves with debilitating diseases. Every day in [J1 e United States
families are ripped apart by addiction and abuse. C hildren from
impoverished homes throu ghout the worl d are forced into prosti-
tution and slave labor. Billions suffer from mental illness, including
severe depressio n. Each day, millions of animals undergo unspea k-
able sufferin g as they are mistreated or butchered for food.
Some of li S turn away from th e daily news beca use we feel so

helpless in the f.lce of so much misery. But if we do so, it feels as if
we arc hidin g from the realities of our world and th erefo re ulti-
mately fro m ourselves as parr ofthat world.
Wh en we do dail y meditation on compass ion and wi sdom ,
instead of cxperi encin g th e daily news as enemy, it can bc received
as the mea ns to inform and deepen ou r co mpassion . In a sess ion of
mornin g m editation, we wish beings to becomc free ofthcir suffer-
in gs. Then throughout the day, when we see or hea r of th e te rrible
difficulties that o thers are undergoing, we can take that knowledge
into our practice on the spot, wishing them freedom from thei r suf-
fering, fro 111 every outer circumstance and inner laye r of it. We ca n
do this when we encounter the tragedies reported in the morning
paper and th e evening news. And we ca n do it when ever w e come
upon an yone in o ur life that is suffering or grieving.
In this way, rath er than hiding from the world, we lea rn increas-
ingly to open our eyes and hearts to it. Then when we sit do wn to
meditate the next morning, the sufferin gs we saw the previous day
inform th e wish of compassion that we exte nd .
Classical Indian and Tibetan texts instruct practiti oners to elicit
co mpassio n for beings by imagining th e horrors th ey undergo in
sufferin g realms of rebirth as taught in Asia n Buddhist cos molo gies:
thc tortures of hell realms, the painful hunger of wa ndering spirits,

th e fearful lives of an ima Is. We can draw in a similar way upon the
viscerally brutal images of war, starvation, abuse, and oppress ion that
we see on television, in newspapers and movi es. Instead of turning
away from the horrors of the contemporary wo rld in helpl essness,

we accept them into our meditation to inform and em power our
co mpassion: "May th ey have deep freedom from suffering."

In this way, the suffering aro und us informs OUf meditation, and
th e compassio n from meditation helps us respond to th e sufferin g
arollnd LI S. Wh en we hear of others' sufferin g or see it, we don 't
have to feel helpless. W e ca n make the wish for th eir deep freedom
fro m it and let the energy of that wish moti va te us to ameliorate
w hatever suffering we ca n. Sufferi ng that cann ot presently be
assuaged need not become an eXCllse to [Urn our heads away. W e
can hold suffering beings in the energy of compassion, wining their
deep freedom from it, keepin g th em in our min d, never forgettin g
th em until th ey are freed.
TheJoy 0/ WIse C01llpassion and Love

Such practice need not make us depressed and glum- just the oppo-
site. It gives us a way to open to the realities arou nd us, instead of
hiding fro m them . It helps us awa ken to more of our ow n hum an-
ity, in solidarity with others all around us, and to be there for oth-
ers in the way wc had intended. There is tremendou s j oy in ge ni ng
real in such ways.
W e are learni ng to be a compassionate presence for others that is
gro unded both in the realities oftheir sufferin g and in their pote n-
ti al for freedom . And we are learning to ac t from there. As we wish
bein gs freedom from all th e levels of th ei r sufferin g, we are also
learning to uphold their deepest capacity for freedom in the nature
of mind . And there is great joy in that as wel l.
In addition, as love and compassion strength en in prac ti ce, sy m-
patheti c joy for many others also emerges. We feel joy automati call y
w hen we sec o th ers experi encing happin ess in their lives, for it is th e
fulfillment o f o ur wish ofl ove and compassion for th em . Th rough
daily practi ce, we increasin gly experience the j oy of co mpassion that
sustai ns others in th eir poten tial for freedom and th e j oy o flove th at

shares in their happiness.
This is w hy it is helpful for aspiring practitioners to meet spiritual

benefactors w ho don 't just talk abou t wise compassion but embody
it. Such people have treme ndolls joy in their lives, which is part of
what inspires o thers to practice SImilarly. T he spiritual teachers quoted
in this book rea Uy are joyful to be with, not because they've hidden
themselves from the terrible realities of others, bu t because they
uphold oth ers' pmemial for goodness and fTeedom , no matter w hat.
Taking Difficu lties into Compassion and Wisdom

Whal Abolll I},e Diffindl Si/ilalions I},al COll/illll' 10 O((lIe ill Daily Life>
The practi ces oflove, co mpassion, and wisdom transfOnTl every part
of our lives. The wisdom of natural awareness disentangl es th e lay-
ers of our perso nal suffe ring, even our subtle tendenci es to grasp
pai nfull y 011 to ourselves and on to duali sm . Love and compassion
increasin gly manifest as such wisdom unleashes th eir boun dless ener-
gies. When we experience such qualities in morning meditation and
recall th em during our day, it lessens our self-centered reactions to
people and eve nts, fo r in lo ve and co mpassion we reso natc with
others heart to heart, below th e radar of self-ccn tered suspicion, pos-
sessiveness, and anger.
The path of enlightenment, however, is not jus{ easy and smooth.
The practices th emselves rea lly challe nge us. They co nfro nt o ur
sense of self and they refute the world we thought we had known .
We had defin ed our self, in large part, through our redu ctive labels
of others and by our emoti onal reactions to those labels. Prac ti ces of
wisdom and love redefin e others as worthy of love no matte r w hat

and one's self:ls someone who can love all un conditi ona ll y. Such
pure perception, at first, seems like a hu ge lea p. It is not easy to
learn, like Joh n Nash, to ignore our self-ce ntered delusions and rel y
instead on t he power of loving compassion and wisdom th at tran-

scends them .
Meanwhile, w henever we arc not in meditation or do no t expe-

ri ence irs self-transcending power, our ego-ce ntered reactions occur
in th e usual ways. From long habit, th e same situati ons that ha ve
tri ggered feelin gs of hurt and painful emotion conti nu e to do so.
In deed, upse tting thoughts and emotions ca n sccm magnifi ed as the

peacefulness of meditation, by co ntrast, makes us more conscious
of their disturbing qualities.
If we perscvere with daily practice, the powcr of wisdom and
loving co mpassion strengthens. Over time. it becomes increasingly
prese nt in our life. 8m in th e meantim e, w hat are we CO do with
our accllscomed, ego -centered reactions to diffic ulti es-a ll the
hurtful feelings and painful emotions that continue CO come up dur-
in g our day?
The meditation of compassion speaks directly CO thi s prob lem.
Instead of inte rpreting feelings of difficulty in ways that intensify
our self-ce nteredn ess. the practice of compassion reframes them as
our connec tion to others. Every painful feelin g we have is an exa m-
ple of what man y others feel. To experience them in empath y wit h
oth ers lets LIS take them in to th e path of enlightenm ent.
Takillg D!fjiCII[ties ililo Compassioll 011 the Spot
Bodhi citta lth e mind of enlightenmentJ arises in th e person-

ality of ordinary beings w ho are completely atta ched to sal11-
sara. The reason? Such bein gs constantly grasp at a "self" and
thu s experience intense feelings of sufferin g. From th e depth
of that perso nal suffering, co mpassion is born for other se n-

ti ent beings. This process IS th e extraordinary cause for
becoming a Buddha.
Zhechen Gyaltsab Rinpoc he(u
All feelings of hurt. difficulty. and frustration can be taken directly

into compassio n and the path of enli ghtenment. To do so, we need

CO recall th e perspective of wise compassio n from our meditati on
practice and apply that perspective to difficult feelin gs as we ex pe-
rience th em dllrin g the day and over th e course of our life. T aking
diffi culties into compass ion "on the spoc" allows o ur ow n problems
and sufferings to become a direc t link to others, awa kening our
enli ghtened potencial for empathy, unconditional care, and wisdom.
At first, practi ce rhe following steps by yourself, w hile becoming
used to th e process. After you are ('l.Illiliar with th e practice, you
will be able to apply it in almost any situation o r enviro nm ent, "on
th e spoc," whenever a difficulty emerges. The important thing to
remember is that yo u must begin from a place of actuall y expe ri enc-
in g so me fo rm of difficu lty. You must be in to uch w ith a spec ifi c
manifestation of discomfort, troublin g emotion , o r physical pain.
That shouldn 't be much of a problem; if we really look, th ere 's
almost always something bothering us!
T ake the time now to get in touch wi th an arca of discomfort,
howe ver small it might be. If you have to "manufacture" a diffi-
cul ty, recall a rece nc feeling of diffi culty , such as durin g an unsa ti s-
f.1Ctory conve rs.1tion, a ph ysical ailment, an un comforL1ble emotion,
or expen ence of anger, disa ppointment, frustration , lo neliness,
depression.
Meditation: Taking Difficulties into Compassion

Step I: Allow yo urself to feel and experience the full depth

of the discomfort and suffering occurring in your mind and
yo ur body, every laye r of it. Feel w hat it's like for someone
to undergo thi s experience.
Step 2: While feeling this difficulty, come to the recogni-

tio n: " This is what so many experience. 711is very feeling."

As if you are sensing wha t o th ers fee l. As if yo ur persona)
di scomfort gives you the opportunity to kn ow directly what
coundess others experience.
Compassioll as a Libermillg POUler ."¥- ' 9 '
Step 3: R ecaUing yo ur benef.1c tors above and behind you,

receive the healing radia nce of their compassion into your
feelings of sufferin g. Then let that radian ce come throu gh
YO ll perva sively to all others who experien ce similar suffer-
ings. Commun e with them through the wish and energy of

compassion: " May th ey have deepest freedom from suffer-
ing." En vision that the w hole uni verse of bein gs is bath ed in
the ge ntl e, radiant bless ing of compass ion, evo king their
deepest freedom in the nature of th eir minds.
Step 4: Envision that all beings, becoming deepl y frcc of suf-

fe rin g, experie nce great joy. Take joy in th eir joy, as if it
were yo ur own.
Step 5: After somc timc, drop the visuali za ti on and rel ax into
o neness w ith th e all-pervasive radiance of co mpassion.
rel easing all frames of refe rence into boundless openness and
cognizance. the infinite expanse of the nature of mind.
INote: if you are " on the spot" at work or dri ving, you need
[Q mal11ta111 your fram es of refe rence, so simpl y omit this
last step.]
Th c circumstan ces of sufferin g differ for individua ls, but th e under-

lying fedings of misery are common to us all. Through thi s practice,
our own fcelings of difficulty pull us into vivid recogn itio n of what
so many others feel.

Witho ut such a practice, we tend to take Ollf sufferings person-
all y in ways that isolate us. We gene rate mu ch nega tive kanna by
clinging to our mi se ri es, blamin g oth ers for th em, or wallowi ng in
self-pity. But this o n-the-spot practi ce, whi ch roHows naturally
from th e meditati on of compassion , does th e reverse. It reveals o ur
suffer ing as undi vided from others and th eirs from us. It ge nera tes
tremendous karmic merit for the enli ghtenment pa th by harnessing
our ow n suffering to open our minds in compassion CO ochers. And
that helps brea k o pen our narrow grip on scif, to let the in finite radi-
ance of compassio n express the w isdom of tile mind 's infinite nature.
Let's go through a r.t th er common exampl e: Suppose a co-work er
criticizes YO ll in from of oth er people, igniting feelin gs of hurt and
rage in you . Without the practi ce of co mpass ion, thi s wou ld be the
occasio n for anger to reity your sense of self in hatred for th e co-
worker. But through the steps above, the same emo ti ons become
the path of enlightenment.
Apply th e steps above. After th e in cident , w hen YO Li have a
moment CO yourself, drop the focus of attentio n o n th e pe rso n who
triggered yo ur anger. Focus instead on th efeelillg of hurt and anger.
Feel w hat it's like for someone to undergo th at, experie ncing th e
layers of physical sensation and emotions li ke fru stra ti o n, despair,
resentment, rage, w hatever comes up fo r you. Then come to the
recognitio n : "This is w hat so many experience. 'nlis very feeling."
T hrough your own hurt and anger, sense directl y what so many
others undergo.
R ecall your beneL1ccors and receive th eir compa ssionate energy
into your painful feelings and emotio ns. Let th :lt radiance co me
through YOll to all th e others who experience similar sufferin gs, co m-

munin g with th em in the wish and energy of compassion, evoking
their deepest capacity for freedom. Imagi ne that all o th ers who feel
these feel ings become released from their self- graspi ng patterns of
anger and hu rt and experience the j oy of such freedom. Takejoy in

their joy. Finally, if you are not in tile midst of other activities, release
through that radiance into the wisdom beyo nd self-reference.

Thro ugh such steps, rather than intensifyin g self-ce nteredness,
feelin gs of anger and despair are tra nsmuted in to energi es of com-
passion that bless the world.
Compassioll as a Libermillg POUler ."¥- ' 93
And w hen yo u practice like this throu gh om th e day, it informs

yo ur medi tation sessions. The meditation instru ctio n to rec eive
compassion imo fee lin gs of hurt and anger wi ll not be abstract. You
ca n recall th e hurt and anger you felt at your workplace th e previ -
o us day and take that vividl y into your next mo rnin g meditatio n
session . Those are th e layers of mental sufferin g th:lt are to be bathed
in th e rad iance of comp:lssion .
Wh en you become familiar with the co mpassio n meditation,
YO li can t:lk e your benef.lctors wherever YO LI go. There is no rea-
so n to recall th em on ly durin g formal meditati o n sessio ns. You
ca n recall yo ur benefac tors above your head and behin d yo u
eve rywh e re yo u go, radiating th e powe r of lovin g compassion,
cradling the painful fee lings that come up in your da y w ithin the
energy of their compassio n, and illumining all other bein gs in the
sam e radian ce. In thi s way, the experie nces of yo ur day inform
yo ur medi tation sessions, and yo ur m ed itati o n sessio ns empowe r
the rest o f yo ur day.
Diff;wtt Emot;olls alld People as a enlcial Part of the Path

We can do th e on-the-spot practice w hen any difficult emotions
occur. The instruction is th e sa me for every disturbin g emo ti o n:
loneliness, longi ng, ra ge, confusion, fea r, grief, guilt , j e<llomy, feel-
in gs of inadequa cy, self-hatred, ego- centered pride, and all the rest.
By takin g painfu l emotions into the path in this way we are Ilot
seeking to avo id them in th e name of spirituality. Usuall y w hen we

ex perience di sturbin g emotions, we either want to suppress and fo r-
ge t them as soo n as possible or to act them o ut an d ratio nalize any

harm that o ur actions may cause. The steps above pro vide a third
alternative, neither suppressing nor enactin g o ur painful emotions.

R.ecall th e instru ction to take the tim e to feel your emo ti o ns, no t to
dismiss th em , and 110[ just to act them out. Throu gh this practi ce.
we become m o re intimate wi th o ur emotions, but instead of being
driven by th em into deluded actions, th eir energies are transformed

in to energies of compassio n.
So we are noc tryin g to get o ur diffi cult emo tions to go away.
Instead, we recogni ze their deeper mea nin g as o ur co nn ec ti o n ro
o th ers. In thi s way, rath er than distracting LI S fro m th e path of
enli ghtenm ent, o ur emotions becom e a cru cial part of th at path .
Iro ni cally, th en, th e people and circllmstan ces th:}[ trigger Ollf dif-
fi cult fcelings provide criti cal support fOf o ur spiritu3.i p3.th. Since we
tend to suppress sufferin g feelings fr0111 coming [Q conscio us awa re-
ness, unless o th er people trigger our diffi cult emo ti o ns , we ca n't sec
th e p3.inful tendencies that we share with all oth ers. We wouldn 't
kn ow th e bas is in o ur o w n experi ence fo r empath y w ith others.
Whot've r triggers such emotio ns reveals the mental suffering that
co nn ects us to all ochers. Indeed , o ne sign ofprOb'TeSs o n the path is
gra ti tud c no t j ust to those who send us love but also to th ose w ho
make difficulti es fOf us. Bo th are equally cru cial fo r o ur ow n spiri-
tll al awa kenin g.
Taking D!ffiruft Feelings into Karmic

Pu r!ficatioll and Compassion
The selfs claims of importance are th e 1110tor drivin g salllsara

and th e rea l enemy of awakening to 3. hC3.lthi cr way of

bein g .... Wh enever we experience haml o r sutTerin g, we can
trace it to its source in our [own] th o ughts and actio ns, and
Icarn to be independent of the patterns that h3.ve bo un d us.
Tarthang T ulku 6--i

[A] benefi t of havin g problems is that YOll can lise th em to

puri fy negative ka rma. Th ink: " All my pro blems co me o nly
from m y negative karm3.."
Lama Zopa llinpocheM
As explained in chapter 3, all our feelin gs of unhappin ess and hap-

pi ness are the ou tflow of our own karma. They are triggered by cir-
cumstan ces around us, but the source of such feelin gs is in our own
mind. Feelin gs of unhappiness are th e fruiti o n of our own past
harmful thoughts and actions that were motivated by narrow self-
centeredncss, h:ared, posseSSIveness, and so forth. Feelings of hap-
pi ncss arc the fruiti on of our ow n past positive thou ghts and actions
that were motivated by love, co mpassion, openn ess, and wisdo m .
Other perso ns and situations trigger feelin gs in us, but they do not
inject them into us. To unders tand th e teac hing of karma is CO know
th e differcnce between the inner cause of our feelin gs (our own past
thoughts and ac ti ons) and w hat tri ggers th em (extern al conditions
and persons) without confusing the two.
If wc do not understand kanna, w hen someone's acti on triggers
a feel in g of hurt in us, we mistake him as th e very so urce of ou r
feeling and hate him for it. Then we may retal iate in anger, w hich
triggers hi s feeling of hurt and evokes a host iJ e response, w hich
reignites our feelings of hurt and resentment, and the cycle of harm-
ful karma and suffe ring goes a ll .
Something similar occ urs w hen we wa nt things to go well for us
but th ey don' t. If we work on a project and it (1i1s, o ur expecta-
ti ons are das hed, precipitatin g feelings of hurt. Mistakin g th e situa-
tion as the very so urce of our unhappy feeling rather than the tri gger
of it, we may loo k for someone to be th e object of our blamc and
bitterness, or we may wallow in self- pity. Again, the cycle of suffe r-
in g karma is co ntinu ed.
But w hen we know the meanm g of karma, we ca n engage feel-

ings of hurt and unhappiness in a completely different way, by using
th em to purify our negative kamla and to cut [he suffering cycle of

kannic reac tio n. When we feel hurt, no ntarrer w ho or w hat trig-
gered it, we call accept tllejeelillg itself as tllefrllifioll of Ollr 01/111 past
actiollS. By taking responsibility and acceptin g our unpleasant feelings
in thi s way, we don ' t reinforce our ego-ce ncered te ndencies for
harmful reaction. Harmful karma from o ur past is burned up as it
comes to fruition in our present feelin gs. And sin ce there is no
defensive reac tion ro those feelings, just deep acceptance of them ,
the cycle of karma is severed. In this way, our feelings of misery,
rather than reinforcing hamlful tendencies ofkamlic reactio n, purify
our minds of those tendencies.
Indeed, this gives us another reaso n to feel gratitude to those who
activate painful feelings in us. W hen we kn ow how to take such
feelin gs into the prac tice, we realize that the people who give lIS
troub le arc helping us to progress on the path. They assist us in burn-
ing away th e suffering results of ou r negati ve karma and in purify-
ing o ur minds of its tendencies.
Suc h kanllic purifi cation is contextualized by o ur practice of
co mpassio n . Lik e ourselves, all other bei ngs experi ence unh appi-
ness as th e o utflow of th eir own hannful kamla and have reacted to
it with further harmful ac tions that only ge nerate more sufferin g for
th em. Know ing tlus, we ca n accept OlIf difficult feelings as an exam-
ple of what all others are undergoi ng, ge neratin g co mpassion for
them . Thus, by accepti ng our own painful feelings, we not only
purify our mind but generate tremendous karmic merit in compas-
sion for others.
Buddh ist ma sters, drawing upon th e teaching of rebirth, have

expbined that such practice purifies eo ns of nega tive karma from
our past ljves. Whateve r cosmological beliefs yo u may have , YO ll
ca n feel the power of this practice to purify your mind of its

entrenched tendencies of self-centered rea ction and to generate pos-

itive energy in co mpass ion for others. As wt: experience this spiri-
tual power, the difficult ClrCUlllstances that previously el icited o nly

our ange r or self-pity begin to evoke joy, for we are learning how
to experience such circumstan ces in ways that fu lfill th e deeper pur-
pose oflife. M
Compassioll as a Libermillg POUler ."¥- ' 97
Takillg S"iferillg Direlliy ill/o Wisdom

When th e nOl1 concept ual wisdom of nawral awareness becom es
strong enough through famil iari ty in meditati on, to recall th at wis-
dom becomes th e most direc t way to take diffi cult experi ences into
the path.
Since nothin g, ultim ate ly, has any existcncc w hatsoever, if

yo u loo k at the acwal nature of th e disturbing emoti ons or
sufferin g, you will see that th ey arc non - arisin g even fro m
the fi rs t.
Z hechen Gyal tsab l~i npo c h e67
W hen something disturbs you, and yo u are caught in the cum10il of

difficult emotio ns, recall how you suffer by identifying with the self-
clinging content of yo ur thoughts and emotions instead of recogni z-
ing th eir narure. Having remembered this, let yourself co me in to
recognition of the very essence of th e thoughts and emotions. R est
directly in the abiding nature of th e experience, cognizant empti-
ness, wh ich is already free of sufferin g. R est direc tly in th e infinite,
luminous openness of all experience- beyo nd change, beyond
grasping, beyond all reference points of personal sufferin g.
If thi s perspective does n't feel poss ible yet, it mean s that th e
stre ngth of noncol1ceptual wisdom from meditat ion has not yet
developed enough to be called upon so directly in ordinary life. But
if yo u are f..1nllliar wi th the sharp inquiries of chapter 2 that support
wisdom , yo u can draw upon th em in the moment of difficult emo-
tio n. As Khye ntse l'ti npoche explains:

... in that \Vhi ch is temled deluded, there is nothin g impure,

nothin g to rid ourselves of. Nei ther is th ere somethin g else,
pure and undel uded, whi ch we should try to adopt. For,
indeed, wh en illusion dissolves, un deluded \Visdom is simply
prese nt, where it always has been . .. if we subject th e deluded

mind to analysis, and reach the conclu sio n that it is free from
birth, cessa tion and abiding existence, we w ill discover, th en
and there, a wisdom w hich is und el uded.
Dilgo Khyemse llinpoche 1oll
W hen yo u experi ence thoughts of anger, for example. recall that

you suffer by clingin g to the self-centered co ntent of yo ur th o ughts;
from no t recogni zi ng their nature. T hen recall o ne o f th e sharp
inq uiries you know from practice and bring it vividly CO mind. Use
the inquiry you've found most effec ti ve to short circuit the ego-
centered mi nd, to undercut th e grip on "self" an d "oth er," to per-
mit yo ur points of reference to collapse into ungraspablc emp tiness
and cognizance, th e sky- like nature of mind.
Fo r exa mpl e, ask yourself: " From w here do th ese th o ughts and
feelin gs arise?" Letti ng [hat qu estion guide yo ur attenti o n, tra ce th e
rad iance of thoughts and feelings to th ei[ empty, luminous ground.
O r ask: "Where are these thoughts dissolving?" o r "Where are they
loca ted?" o r "Who is experi encin g?" If you have begun to experi-
ence the power of such inquiries in formal meditation sessions, yo u
can invoke them in th e mom ent of sufferin g. so sufferi ng itself
beco mes th e stimulus to direct you toward the w isdom to be di scov-
ered in th e very nature of your ex peri ence.I ""

In these ways, painful feelings and emoti o ns becomc alli cs for our
practice. They show us w hen we arc lost in th e hallucinatio ns of
self-centeredn ess instead of abiding in tbe nature of mind that rec-
ogn izes th em as hallu ci nations. They remind us to return to refuge

in {he Dharma, by taking our sufferin gs into compassio n , into
brlllic purification, o r into recogn ition of th e empty, radiant nature

of all experience.
Compassioll as 0 Libermillg POUler ."¥- 199
Where there is hallucination, there is the truth, by recogni z-

ing it as hallu cination. Where there is suffering, there is peace
and bliss, by lettin g go and experiencing it for numberl ess
suffering bein gs.
Lama Zopa lUnpoche70
Great Compassion
Great compassion (lI1ohakanllla) is a Buddhist term for th e full est
form of compassion. It wills the freedom of all beingsfrolll (II/ three
levels of sutTerin g whil e sensing each one as dear. And it assumes
responsibility to help them achi eve such freedom, knowing it to be
possible. Such universal compassion is a purified perception and will
that communes with and evokes th e dee pest good of each bein g
witho ut exceptio n. while taking all personal difficulties into the path
of enli ghtenment for th eir sake. 71
Shabkar Rinpoc he expresses the qualities of such compassion in
furth er advice to his student, following upon the quote at the begi n-
nJn g of this chapter:
The sam e number of years you spent meditatin g on empti-

ness, yo u should now spend meditatin g day and ni ght on
co mpassion- a compassion a hundred tim es stronger than

that of a moth er for a child burnt in a fire , an unb ea rabl y
intense compassion that arises w hen thinking abo ut the suf-
fering of se nti ent beings.
Once such co mpassio n is born, you must practice until YOlI

come to think , with fi erce energy, "Until enli ghtenment, I

shall do w hatever is possib le to benefit all bei ngs, not omit-
ting a sin gle one-no matter what evil actions th ey commit,
an d now matter what difficulti es I must endure. " 72
200 ~
Awakellillg Tllrollgll Love
practi ce into the fu l1 dep th of compassion and w isdom.

May this ex horLo1tio n echo w ithin us , motivating us to take o ur
7. Living Life Anew
and Embodying Deep Goodness
Summing Up Out' Situation

Th e introduction argued that authemic love, gro und ed in deep wis-
dom , is the basis of Oll T safety and well- bein g Jn d th e esse ntial moti -
va ti on to truly benefit others. In addition, I argued that the ability
to embody slI ch love is nor given to just a few- anyone can real ize
th e life-transforming power of love and co mpass io n by enterin g
full y eno ugh into the requisite practices------such as the medi tatio ns
presented in chapters J throu gh 6.
As I also noted in the introduction, children thrive with ul1co ndi-
ri onal love. They only feel at home in th e world when they receive
the love that up holds their essential goodness, no matter how crazy
th eir young In .inds may be at tim es. But none of liS oucgrows that
need. W e alf need to know that someone perceives the fi.ll1damen-
tal goodness of ou r bein g and holds us in that pure visio n. eve n when
w e are most lost in the dark places of our minds. Wh en held safe in
the love of o ur benef.1ctors, our own capacity to love ca n manifest
and be ex tended similarly to others, holding th em safe in its pure
vision. Thro ug h the meditations of prior chapte rs, we've lea m ed to

experience love and compassion as boundless qualities innate to us-
healing, liberating powers that can be drawn u pon at any tim e.

As we've seen, however, o ur egos draw back fr0111 th e boundless
qualities of o ur fundamenta l aware ness by co njurin g a rigid . nar-
row , and substantial sense of self. D ependin g on w heth er people
co nfi rm o r disconfirm that limited self-co ncept, the ego catego-

rizes them as wo rthy or unworthy to be lo ved . In di vid uall y and
sociall y condi tioned in this way , o ur minds routinel y hide the pro-
fo und wo rth and dignity of self and others, preve ntin g us fro m
respo ndi ng to each w ith care and reverence. Witho ut a clear prac-
ti ce of imp artial lo ve and w isdom to cut thro ugh that basic error,
we react to o ur labels for others rather than to actual perso ns, and
we do n' t eve n notice th e difference. People everywhere are caught
in th is dan gero us error, th e cause of mu ch harm and a great deal of
sufferin g.
As I write thi s, th e recent news is that dozens of people abducted
in Inq were found tortured to death and beheaded. Elsew here in th e
Middle East, rockets were fi red into crowds, di smemberin g men,
women , and child ren . A retali atory ai rstrik e maimed an d ki lled
many mo rc. Ea ch side, view in g th emsel ves as th e victims, self-
righteo usly called for revenge in th e name of j ustice. A husband and
f.1ther in my city inflic ted so mu ch abuse o n hi s mi ddle- aged w ife
th at she bro ugh t herself and her children to a shel ter. An angry
yo un g lo ne r, shu nned by his peers, tricd to ki llm:lI1Y stra nge rs at a
local bar. T w o yo ung parents, moment.1fily enraged by their ini1nt's
endless crying, shook her into a coma. A gang yo uth fired his gun
at a rival ac ross th e stree t, killing a three-yea r- old girl.
At the nlO lllent of th eir action s, th ese perpetrators paid attenti o n

j ust to th ci[ own self- ce ntered th oughts of th e o nes th ey so ught to
harm , not t o the ir full humanity. In the years prior to the f.1teful
Ill o ment of these perpetrators' ac ti ons, o th ers had don e li kewi se to
them: reacting to red uctive thoughts of them rather than to their

fu ll hu mani ty. After the perpetrators' ho rrific actio ns, many who
heard the n ews paid attentio n on ly to th eir thought of the perpetra-

to rs as subhu man, calling fo r violent revenge in the name of "jus-
tice," with little attenti o n to th e specifics of th eir li ves o r to the
potenti al for good in eve n sll ch flawed hum an bei nb'"S'
Lil/ing Life Anew and Embodying Deep Coodlless ."¥- 203
Note th e extraordinary posi ti on o ur mcditati ons have put us in .

The med itati o ns of love, compassion, and wisdom thoro ughly
un dercut the indi vidual and social mechanisms dri vin g such hanll-
fu l actions and reactions. They reveal all persons as worthy of love
and ourselves as people who (all love them un co nd it ionall y and
impartia ll y. Th ese practices draw us into a purer way ofp erceivin g
th at upholds th e fu ndamental goodness and potenti al o f (II/ persons,
howeve r fla wed, w hil e empowerin g us to chall enge th eir harmful
tend encies.
Wh en anyon e, anywh ere , learns to abide in such loving wisdom,
th ey generace a zone of refu ge and protection th at encircles all th ose
around th em . They become a force to remake this wo rld in to a
place o f deep mutual reve rence and appreciation. To lea rn to
embody such wise lo ve, and to ac t from th ere for the sa ke of all, is
th e grea test gift we can gi ve to o ur famili es, co mmuni ties. and
world. T o abide in such love also ge nerates tremend o us karmi c
power fo r progress in spi ritual awakening and for ex periencing our
lives w ith increasin g j oy.
At dle begi nnin g of our practice the shift of consciousness from
ego-centered ness to slI ch pure perception ma y seem li ke a hu ge
leap. But as we persevere with practice over tim e, wisdom and lov-
in g compass ion beco me increasingly present in us, affec tin g every-
thin g. For th e process to unfold fully, we must est3.blish 3. regular

meditati on practi ce and leam to apply its power in every part of our
li ves. W e also need th e support of spiritual friends and teachers
mature in th e enli ghtened qualities that we see k to reali ze.
Establishing a D aily Practice

For love. co mpassio n. and wisdom to beco me strong. YO ll need a

dai ly meditation th at evokes those qualitics. A session of meditatio n
each morning esrablishes yo ur frame of mind for the rest of th e day.
Wh en you are f.1 nliliar with th e meditatio ns of chap ters 5 and 6,

a1cernate them to bring out the qualities of eac h. For exa mpl e, you
could do the medi tatio n of love and wisdom dai ly fo r a mo nth ,
compassio n and wisdom daily the next mo mh , and so o n. Or YOll
could do both meditations each day, o ne in the monli ng, the o th er

in the evenin g.
If YOll don't meditate eac h day- in th e mo rnin g if possible-you
won't have anything to integrate into the rest of th e day. But if yo u
rest in natura l wisdom and hold others in un co ndi tiona l care durin g
a morning session, yo u can return to that perspective throughout
the da y. Loving compassion and wisdom ca n th en fl ow natura ll y
into yo ur relations hips and interaction s, infusin g th em w ith grace
and ease.
R emember, the rigid sense of self that obstnl ces o ur potential to
love is no thin g mo re than a chain of shiftin g th o ughts. So if you
think , " I ca n' t change, I'm not a loving person," remember that
th ose tho ughts are nothing more than a mo mentary fabrication,
containi ng no real claim to truth. Such a thin veil of ego-ce ntered
thinkin g in the head is all that obscures o ur po tential for co mmunin g
with others from the hea rt. By recalling the perspecti ve of morning
meditation at other tim es of th e day, we can resonate with others at
hea rt level -below th e reactiviry of everyone's egos-and cxtend
the healin g energy of love and compassio n to whomever we meet.
R.ecalling the Perspective of Morning Meditation

throughout the Day
Rua/lillg Natllral Wisdom throllghollt the Day

In th e last step of every meditation session, YOll merge with the radi-
ance o f love or compassion and relax into th e abiding nature of
mind, the sky-l ike expanse of openness and awareness be yo nd ref-
ercnce poines. In this w ay, meditation each mo rning L.u' n iliarizes you
w ith the natural wisdom of resting in simplicity, beyo nd grasp ing o n

to self or any sense of separateness. During the day, yo u ca n recall
thi s wisdom whe n with others and relax w ithin natural awareness
wherever YOll are, just as in morning meditation . To do so is to
become more full y present to others, not lost in self-concerned wor-
ri es, not clingi ng to yourself as separate from them . T o abide like
th at w hil e wi th others is to enjoy them in th eir very being and to
listen deeply, w hi ch also brin gs th em mu ch happin ess.
W hen yo u are ou tside in th e natural w o rld , gazin g upon a wide-
open vista o r sitting by the sea, let that vast panorama pull your mind
beyond its narrow posture of self-clingin g into the vast expanse of
natural awa reness. Let th e limitless spaciousness of th e sky awaken
your limitless " inner sky" of cognizance and openness. In this way,
you ca n allow the infinite spacio usness of the outer world to help
pull you ge ntly into recognition of th e infinite nature of mind.7l
Recalling Lov, alld COlllpassioll throllghollt th, Day

In mo rnin g meditation you also exte nd th e w ish and energy oflove
and compassion to many beings in widening circles as the expressio n
of wisdom. At that time, be sure to specifi cally direc t the ra dia nt
wish of love and compassion to all th e people YOll plan to see later
in th e day and to aU the places yo u will go : your ho me, workpla ce,
the stree ts yo u will travel, the places yo u wi ll visit, and so fo rth .

Th en as you see and meet people in those places througho ut th e
da y, let th e conta ct pu ll YO ll back, o n the spot, into the perspecti ve
and energy of YOLlr meditation sessio n. Morning medication revealed
your worl d as a holy rea lm-all others sensed as sac red. As yo u see
them aro un d YO li in the day, commun e agai n w ith the jmrinsic
goodn ess of their being beyond reducti ve labels, making it natural

to respo nd to eac h with reverence and care.
Key R>illts Jor 11Itegratillg Practice illfo Your Life

Throughout the day, at times when there's no need to plan or inter-
act, j ust be present in the wisdom of natural awareness- attentive,
joyfully at ease in whatever you do , at rest in the ab idin g nature of
experie nce that is w ide o pen, fresh, mysteri o us, and undi vided. Let
each part of yo ur day flow from that undi vi ded openn ess, witham
pull ing bac k into a small, defended sense of self When yo u need
acti vely to plan or to interact with people. let th e n:ttural open ness
:ll1d responsiveness of that innate w isdom tak e express ion in
thoughts and accions oflove and compassio n. In these simple ways,
wisdom and love continue to infon1l your life fro111 mornin g to
night, grad u:lll y transfon1ling your mind and body into the emis-
sary of those enlightened qualities.
Integrating M editation into Each Part of Your Day
We need not think that we work, ha ve ajob and family, and

th erefore ca nnot be true Dharma practition ers ... th e esse nce
ofDharl11a is th e precious bodhichitta rthe spirit of enlight-
enm ent], which can be cultivated in Jny ci rcumstan ces and
durin g any :lctiviry . ... W e can all practi ce th e D harma in
mind, w hile bein g engaged in any foml of activity with body

and speec h.
Nyoshul Khen Rinpoc h e7~
If you learn to integrate th e spirit of w isdom and love into many

little mo ments, day by day, it transfonns yo ur life and blesses those
around YOll . Reca ll the Splnt of mornin g meditati o n at meals, o n a

walk, when watch ing television or reading th e paper, w hen playing
games, whe n visitin g with others, and so forth. When there is no
need to talk, simply rest in natural awareness. When interacting w ith
others, radiate the love and compassion of that awareness to all, as

in the foHowing examples.
At th, Breakfast Tabl,

If your partner or children joi n YOll at breakf.1st, co mmun e with
them in the radian ce of love recalled frol11 momin g meditation , as
yo u help them w ith their meals and chat at th e table. If YO ll read the
morning newspaper, make the deep wish of compass ion for those
YOll read abollt who are sufferi ng; take j oy in those w ho benefi t oth-
ers. When YO ll hug your children, partner, or pet before leaving for
work , let th e hug seal them with the blessing of love and co mpas-
sion still vivid from morning meditation.
COllllllwillg to Work
Whil e commuting to work, recall yo ur benefactors above yo ur head
or in yo ur hea rt, and let the w ish and radian ce of love rain down
upon al.l the commuters and passersby around you. When ca ught in
a traffi c jam, noti ce your feelings offrustration , look at th e multitude
of drivers around yo u undergoing si milar misery, receive the radi -
ance of compassion, and let its healing energy extend to them all.
In terpret red stoplights as a signal to rest for th3t brief interlude in
113tural awareness and love. When feelings of anxiety arise becau se
of C3rs and trucks that whiz nearby or from anti cipation of a diffi-
cult day ahead, proceed with co mpassion for the dri vers and pedes-
tri~lIls all around YO ll who experience similar an.xicties.
Arrivillg at Yollr Workplace

R ecall how your workplace was blessed by the radiance oflove and
compassion during your mornmg meditation and acnlally encounter

that blessin g as you arrive there---sensing th e enVir0 I1111 el1[ as a radi-
ant holy realm. As YO ll gree[ co-workers, students , or clients, co n-
tinu e the spirit of meditation. Recognize th em as sacred bei ngs and
commu nc w ith th e goodness of th eir bein g, no matter w ho they

think th ey are or how you had thought of them before taking up this
practI ce.
Many people, w hen with others, think they need to talk co ntin-
ually to feel connected. But by extending the spirit of meditation
into our day, we intuit our conn ection to others just by communin g
with and taki ngjoy in them, whe th er any co nversation happens or
not. Notice how those around you respond to such simple com-
muni o n, eve n w hen it is wordl ess.
At JM,rk
Start yo ur workday before you go to work; take tim e during morn -
ing meditation to receive plenty of loving compassion from bene-
[,c tors beforc resti ng in natu ral awareness and then radiating its wish
and ene rgy to clients, patients, students, o r o th ers yo u w ill serve
thro ughout your workda y. Then, as you acmally mee t those peo-
ple, resume and inhabit that very practice: H old them in the vision
and energy of reverence and love. Mirror thei[ funda mental good-
ness bac k at them, evoking th eir best pote nti al.
If you are a school teacher, for example, during morning medi ta-
tion , envision yourself receiving the radi ance ofl ovi ng compa ssion
and letting it rad iate throu gh yo u [0 all your students. Then merge
w ith that radiance and rest in natural awa reness. Throughou t yo ur

day , periodi ca ll y return to this practice and inh ab it it. The moment
yo u step into the classroom , begin communing with yo ur stu dents
heart-to-hea rt in pure perceptio n, radiatin g un co nditional care
below th e radar of self-co ncerned j ud gments-th eirs or yo urs. Let

your wish for your students' deep well-being help evoke their imlate
abilities fo r discernment, compassio n, and j oy. Sense th em thro ugh

th e w isdo m that recogn izes the undivided nature of mind.
One of my D harma students, T erry , appli es these prin ciples
whil e mentorin g and coun seling priso ners. These m en, often lost
in hateful tho ughts of themselves and angry th oughts about others,

are not used to being viewed through the pure perception of T erry's
prac ti ce, w hi ch senses th eir potential for good w hile holding them
responsible for th eir lives. T o be viewed in that way has been life
transfonnin g for many of them .
If you arc a social acti vist, take your interacti ons with supporters
an d opponents as chances to strengthen such pure perception and
impartial care. T o uph old everyon e's esse nti al goodn ess and pote n-
tial is to imply th at th e political habit of redu cin g o pponents to noth -
in g more than "strangers" and " enemies" is a seri ous mista ke. To
abide in such pure perception provides both an importaJ1[ social
chall enge and a protection for everyone around you.
If you feel tense, fr ustrated, or tired at work, take a break, eve n if
it is on ly brief. R ecall your benefactors above yo ur head or in your
heart and ba th e the te nsions of mind and body in the healing radi-
ance of their loving co mpassion. Then merge into oneness wi th that
luminosity and rest in na tu ral awareness fo r however long you have.
Let sll ch love and wisdom refresh and make you more fully present
to w hateve r you do next.
As you strategize and perform tasks, periodically recall your bene-
f.1Ctors above your head or in your heart and let th eir radi ant com-
passion extend to many others right throu gh th e acti vities of yo ur
body and mind.

Wh en you attend a meetin g, drop to heart level and commun e
with other participants in reverence and radiant compassion . Wh en
you spea k at th e meeti ng, speak from that place. Notice how such
speech affeccs others. Contrast that to the effect o n th em w hen you

find yo urself speaking fro m a more self-centered perspecti ve.
Notice, over tim e, how allY selfishness in your actions toward

oth ers te nds to evoke a self-ce ntered reac ti on from th em . Notice
w hen you ab ide in wise love and compassion, eve n for a moment,
how it tends to evo ke the in ner sanity of oth ers.
It's important frequencly to recall that you are no t just a giver of

love bu t also a receiver of it. So receive it ofte n fro m yo ur benefac-
tors over the course of your day. As you merge dail y with them in
th e lumin osity of love and release into natural awa reness, love's
so urce is revealed aga in and again as the un co nditioned natu re of
mi nd, w herei n YO ll an d oth ers have never been di vided .
Wh", Yo" Feel Upset

Wh en you feel downh earted at work , discoura ged by di ffic ulti es and
disa ppo intments, o r angry with a co-worker o r client , remember
how human such feelin gs are. First have co mpassion fo r yourse lf.
R eca ll yo ur benefacto rs' radi ant w ish of com passio n . Bathe your
body and mind in that healing energy. R ecall that many others expe-
rience th e sa me diffic ult feeling; you are undergoing, and let the w ish
and energy of compassio n extend to them in w ideni ng circles.
Fi nally, as in meditation sessions, release [he visualization, merge into
o neness with the luminosity, and relax in natural awareness.
lly integrating such meditati on practi ces into so many mo ments
of the day, yo u rediscover your work as a growin g ex pression of
impartial love and simple presence. Sense those qu alities graduall y
empowe rin g yo u [Q persevere w ith diffi cul t peop le or situations.
Now your wo rk provid es the opportunity to embody th e awa reness
and care fro m yo ur meditation s, instead of identifyin g with a brit-

tl e ego that gets easily di scouraged by adversities. Even if you flame
up in anger in the mo ment of a painful in cident, as we aLi do at
ti mes, notice your growing capacity to co me back to th e spirit of
med itatio n soo ner after the incident. Explore how yo ur practice
affects o thers: both those yo u serve and yo ur coworkers.
Ifwe have a very pure heart and a d ear, altruistic mind , we

may encoun ter difficuhies o r suffe rings, bu t eventu ally we
are sure to reach bliss and happin ess: it is the inevitable result
Lil/ing Life Anew and Embodying Deep Coodlless ."¥- 2I I
of havin g good intencio n, positi ve an itude, an d puri ty of

heart. If we have a very w icked, dishamlOnious, and nega-
tive min d, we may meet with tempora ry success, but ulti-
mately we w ill have to taste the fru it of suffe ring .... It is only
th e qu ali ty of o ur minds that w ill result in happin ess o r suf-
feri ng, both for o urselves and for others.
Nyoshul Kh en Rin poche7~
Vocatioll
By integrating meditati on practice into your life, YOll do n't just lea rn
how to fun cti o n better within your current job Jnd career. You also
receive li ght o n w hat yo u feel called to do w ith your life, your voca-
ti on . Practice h elps clarify what kind of work may best express your
growing spiri tu al understanding and co ncern .
The ti me may come w hen you don't j ust bring the power of med-
itatio n into your workpla ce btl[ reevalu ate th e w hole q uesti o n o f
w here yo u wa nt to wo rk in order to embody th e spiritual principles
most impo rtant to you . Some w ork environments o r kinds of work
mo re readily evo ke your best potential and help yo u remember your
spiritu al practi ce. O th ers may feel roo oppressive-a t least at yo ur
current scage of practi ce-fo r you to fun ction within th em as a spir-
itual practitio ner. Yo u need to be realisti c about wh ere yo u ;l re in
your practice and not become recurrently o ve rwhelmed by takin g on

more than you can handle in your job or in your spirituai life.
Whm YOIi Feellhal Olhers Are ill Yoll r Wily

Wh en you are waiting to be served in a restaurant o r sto re and find

yourself getting impatie nt and annoyed, notice th e tendency in your
mind to !:tbe! th e wa iter, counter clerk , o r people ahead of you in

line as mere ann oyances th at are in your way. C atch your mind as
it red uces th em in th at w ay. R ecall how people everywhere in si m-
ilar circumst;ll1 ces also diminish o thers and get angry, causi ng mu ch
tension and co nfli ct. R eceive the radiant compass io n of benef.1c-

tors, and let its healing energy extend through you to aLl those w ho
ge t similarly annoyed, while wishing them deep frcedom from such
sufferin g. R emember to invoke your practice wh enevcr YOll find
yourself mome ntarily angry, thinking of anothcr perso n as just an
obstaclc.
Th ere is also a way to brin g wisdom more directl y into such sit-
uation s. As you learn to abide increasingly in natural :twareness, yo u
also becom e more conscious of you r ego reacti ons as soon as they
arisc. When it feels like someo ne is in yo ur way, notice how nega-
tive th oughts form chains of self-centered thinkin g- :ts though th e
ci1:tins of tho ught were trying to make a narrow , defe nsive bound-
ary aro und yourself While abidi ng in natural aw:treness, instead of
Ictting such thoughts spin into further chains, let rh em self-liberate
as they arisc. Ler th e th oughts spontaneo usly rel ease themselves back
into thei r own fundamental awareness, like water pattcrns absorbed
into their own wa ten ness .
When you ca rch on to this way of experiencing thoughts, do it
frequ ently throu ghout the day. Explore what it's like to abide wide
open in natural awareness wherever YOll are, fu Lly present to others,
rath er than identi fyin g with self-concern ed th ought chains. See what
diffe rence that makes for the qu ality of yo ur ex peri ence and for
everyo ne aro und you.
Arriving Home
Wh en yo u arrive home from a long day at work, try to take a short
brea k before interacting mu ch wi th fami ly members or roo mmates.

Use that time to rest a little in the tranquil nature of your mind.
Also receive th e vivifyi ng energy of your benef.1crors' co mpassion

into yo ur w hole body an d mind, healin g your te nsions and frustra-
ti ons, letti ng the luminosity extend to f.1nuly and roommates, then
to many others in widening circles. R efreshed, Ict this loving energy
Lil/ing Life Anew and Embodying Deep Coodlless ."¥- 2 I3
bless your subsequent interactions with family or friends durin g din-

ner preparation and throughout the meal.
D i1lflerti",e
Wh en yo u sit down for supper, don't just say grace, be the grace of
J1:ltural awareness that spontaneously extends the I.l.diance of com-
passion CO all at the table. Let that radian ce extend from yo ur table
outward to all th e supper tables in the neighborhood :lnd th e worl d.
Wh en yo u pass th e butter or salt to someone at th e tabl e, offer it rev-
erently CO thcm in thcir buddha nature. When YOll cat, offcr the
pleasam taste and energy of the food to th e Buddha or the main
benef..'lccor at your heart, w ho radiates his bless in g co all at yo ur table
and to everyonc who sits down to eat everywhere in th e world.
Sleeping Praltice
When going [0 sleep, according to Tibetan instruction and experi-
ence, the mind passes through several natural stages that arc similar
CO th e sta ges of dyin g. At first, your attention focuses externally on
yo urself as YOll are lying on the bed in your roOI11 . As yo u begi n to
drift off, th e mind relaxes and attention turns [0 inner phenom ena:
images, famasies, and spontaneously unfolding strea ms of th ought.
As sleep de epens, all such inner phenomena absorb into a vast sense
of openness and luminosi ty, the clear li ght of s!t:ep that dawns just
before dreams begin.
As you lie down at night to sleep, imagine you arc resting yo ur
head in th e lap of th e Buddha (or yo ur own main spiritual benef.LC-
tor), and receive th e healing radiance of his un conditional love and

compassion into your body and mind from head to toe. As YOll drift
off co sleep through th e stages above, let this loving radian ce merge
wid1 th e vast ope nn ess and luminosity ti1a[ daw ns just prio r to
drea min g. Let be in that clear light, at rest in the mind 's infinitely
spacious, clear, and knowing nature. Such practice at bedtim e helps
prepa re the mind to recognize its unconditio ned nature at th e tim e

of death, to be liberated there into its nirvanic, tranquil essence.
Nourishing and Protecting Your Family with Wisdom

and Love
Let all the rituals of f.111li ly li fe be redi scovered as ges tures of wise
love. Wh en your child wa ll ts to share the stories of his day, take
that chance to be fully present and to listen w ith complete attenti on.
When he tells YO ll about his friends o r teac hers, quietly extend the
radianc w ish of deep well- being to in cl ud e yo ur chil d's circl e of
acquainta nces. Do the same w hen your partner shares stori es of the
people in his o r her life.
Bring the spirit of meditation into leisure time w hen playing wi th
yo ur children. Commune w ith them in the radiance of love and
co mpassio n as th ey deal th e cards, take a tum on the gam e board,
or toss a ball. In that spirit, w hen you look into their eyes, your
gaze w ill naturall y mirror their essential goo dness even wi th out
talkjng.
A new £:1ther recently attended a m editation retreat with me
whe re he was introduced to th ese meditations and fou nd them
inspirin g. But he worried how he wou ld make tim e at ho me for
regula r meditatio n, sin ce hi s baby required so mu ch care with

bathing, bottle feedin g, putting her to bed, and so forth. I to ld him
to view those times as special opportunities to engage the spirit of
meditation. "Whil e bathing yo ur baby in water," I said, "also bathe
her in the radiant wish of love and compassion. W hil e wa itin g for
her to drift off to sleep, tra nsmit yo ur benefactors' lovi ng ene rgy to
her, and let its radiance extend to all other babies in th e world w ho
need such un condi tional care. When she is suckin g milk frol11 her
bottle, let her also 'Slick' the radiant wish oflove from your heart to
nourish her with its energy. Let this luminous wish ex tend to all
babies, then to all others who were once babies but w ho never grow
out of the basic human need for unconditio nal love."
When your partner or child says or does somethin g that angers
yo u, avoi d actin g out your anger in ways yo u will later re gret.
Instead, take a few moments to recall yo ur practi ce. If you ca n, step
away for a short tim e to feel th e painful emotions YOll are experi -
encin g, to sense what it's like for an yone to experi ence such feeli ngs.
Receive th e heali ng ene rgy of your benefactors' compassion into
yo ur mind and body. R ecall how many oth er parents and partners
feel similar difficulty, and let the radiance of co mpassion extend to
th em all. Finall y, merge into oneness with th at lum inosity I an d relax
your mind in nacural awareness. The care and wisdom evoked by
such prac ti ce provide w hat is necessary to respond wisely to your
f..1I11i ly.
Your child 's ow n deep need is to know she is held by love, no
matter who she thinks she is or what she thinks she is doin g. Such
unconditional love is what makes your child fed truly at home. T o
hold your fa mily in your pure perception of their essential good ness
is to evoke th eir capacity to ac knowledge th eir OWI1 goodness and
to recognj ze the sa me in others, encircling all in a zone of protec-
ti on. Extend the sam e pure vision naturally to fri ends of your child
who co me into your home, holdin g th em in its protec ti on as well.
T o mJintain a loving attitude doesn't mea n th at rul es and disci-

plines are to be ignored. My wife and I set strict limits on tel evision
and co mputer time that have not alw<lYs been easy to ~ nforce . But
parents IllJin tain such disciplines best w ith an attitude of stable care
rath er than acti ng frol11 flashes of rage th ey experience in mom ents

w hen th~ir ch ildren don' t cooperate. Everyo ne in yo ur f.1lllily
knows, deep down , thJt th e most important th in g in all situations is

to love everyo ne in volved an d to chall enge th em as needed only
from th at perspective. When you act from momentary uncontrolled
rage, it is 1I0r an Jc t of love, and everyone, in cludin g your chil d,
2 16 ~ Awakellillg Tllrollgll Love
kn ows it. Wh en your child consciously breaks th e rules, to w ith-

draw some of her pri vileges is an effec tive discipline only if she kl /O I/Is
she is still bein g unconditionally loved. And she knows that only to
the extent that you embody wise love in many little ways with her,
not just by voicing it.
As you integrate spiritual practice into so man y aspcct<; of life,
fa mil y membe rs may manifes t mysteriously as emi ssari es of wisdom
and co mpassion. Wh en my son Jonathan was three years old, he
went thro ugh a phase of£.lscination with th e concept of " teasin g,"
wantin g to know when any interaction fit the definition of teasing.
That sum111 er, I was away for several weeks on a silent Dzogchen
retreat w hi c h included th e intensive practice of self- inqui ry: " Who
is meditating? Who, w hat is aware?" At retreat's end, I cailed home.
J onathan answered th e phone. Excited to hea r my vo ice, he
squ eak ed, " Daddy!"
" Yes," I replied.
" ltVlIo are )lOll ?" he asked , out of th e blue.
Stunned, my mind stopped. After a brief silence, 1 heard J onathan's
giggling vo ice: "Ju st tcasing, Daddy!"
On an other occasion, when my younger son David was three, he
ca me into the kitchen with hi s teddy beat and asked his mmh er for
juice. She replied, "Afieryou drink some milk, you may have some
.
JUice. "
Littl e David bega n to whine, "But I wal1tjllice! I wantjlli ce! I
wa ntjllice .... "
Dec iding to play the wise fath er, r picked up David's teddy bear
and pretended that th e bear was calling to David in a hi gh-pitched

voice, " N o, I wa nt the juice! I wa nt the juice for lIIe!"
At firs t David smil ed, then fro wned at th e bear, sayin g, " No, th e
j ui ce is for lIIe."
T eddy re plied, " But IIIhy? I want it, too. "
David fiml ly replied, " Because you're just pretelld, T eddy."
Teddy pa used fo r a moment, studyin g David's f.."lce, and the n

started protesting, "No! I'm not pretend! I' m not pretend! You're
pretend! "
David said firmly , " No 1'", not pretend , T eddy, you're pretend."
T eddy bega n shaking and sobbing and Da vid, with a concern ed
look , asked, "What's wro ng, T eddy?"
T eddy said, " You mean, ['",j ust pretend, and yo u're /lot?"
David picked up Teddy and tenderl y hu gged him, sayin g, " It's
okay, T eddy, we ca n both be pretend," leavin g Dad so mew hat
speec hl ess at his son's intuitive grasp of compassion and wisdom.
Sharing Spiritual Practices with Children

Spiritual practi ces ca n certai nly be tau ght to children. My wife and
I have practiced with our children in si mple ways since they we re
small. When o ur boys were very little, they could relate best to so me
of the rituals of Buddhist practice. At the age of thrcc, they loved to
bow to the statu es of the Buddha and spiri tual benefactors arrayed
on our alta r. They j ostled each other over w ho wou ld help li ght
incense first, w ho wou ld help po ur water into bowls and put flow-
ers and food on the alta r as sensory offerings to enli ghtcn ment. They
also loved to chan t sim ple praye rs and mantras before sitting with us
in silence for a few min utes.

Bctwee n th e ages of five and eleve n, Ollr sons beca me progres-
sivd y more receptive to abbreviated meditati on instru ctions oflove
and wisdom. At that point, one stage at a time, we taught them how
to iden tify their benef.."lC tors, how to receive love deeply and merge
with their benefactors in th at light, how to transmit the radiant wish
oflove in wideni ng circles to the people and animals in th eir neigh-

borhood, sc hool, and th e world.
One eve nin g, w hen Da vid was five, he came into the bathroom
and put himself in to meditation posture on the floor whi le Barbara
helped J onathan fi nish bnJshing his tee th . J ona than lau ghed, but
Da vid, quite seriously, kept meditating there on the floor. After a
few minutes, he said, "Wow! Meditatin g on love is amazing. T here
really is light coming out of my body." Later, I told David he could
experime nt like that whene ver he wa nts and can talk with me or
with Mom m y abom what he experi ences, but otherwise it wou ld
probably be best to keep it to himself. He said, "Good. And Daddy,
when yo u experiment, have you see n an rlu t li ght in the hea rt?"
At thirteen, J onathan started to enj oy participa tin g in one-day
medita ti on retreats, especially with spiritual teac hers w ho have a
good sense of hU111or, and at fourteen he's begun to vo ice in terest
in lo nger re trea ts. He has also enj oyed readin g biogra phies o f spiri-
tual masters that give vivid descriptions of cheir meaningful encou n-
ters and experi ences. It's important, Barbara and I have found , [0
ga uge th e child's developmental sta ges of spiritual inte rest and
understanding and to introduce pldcti ces and readings as appro pri-
ate for those stages.
Once our tcac her, Nyoshul Khenpo , was asked w hat he recom-
mended for parents w ho want to teac h th eir children th e Dharma.
First and fo remost, he said, parents should lea rn to be good practi-
!iollers of th e Dharma- [O embody endurin g love, co mpassion,
patience, and wisdol1l. C hildren closely obsclve th eir parent" and
internalizc what th ey observe in th em, not just Wh3t th ey are told

by th em . If th e parents are not really li vin g th e D h3rm3 , he said,
their child ren are likely to have little inten:st in it.
Payi ng New Attention to the Digni ty of All

An enjoyable time to in tegrate medi tati on practice is when you are

out doi ng e rrands, surrounded by people unknown to you. In th e
grocery store, notice all the people that your mind tends to 13bel
"stranger." T hen rest in natural wisdom, simple prese nce, beyo nd
Lil/ing Life A nelll and Embodying Deep Coodlless ."¥- 2 I9
clinging to any sense of separa tion between self and other. O r recall
yo ur morning meditation when you leaned in past th e label
"stranger" to commun e heart to heart in love or compassion, and
inha bit that perspective on the spot. Practice similarly w hen shop-
ping for clothes, sitting in a restaurant, picking up dry cleaning,
shopping in a mall , travelin g on a bus or train , waiting at th e airport,
and so fort h.
In time such practi ce begins to reveal th e remarkable dignity and
sacredn ess of evelyone around you w herever yo u are. As this occurs,
it feels as thollgh blinders are being taken from yo ur eyes. The label
"strangers" drops away, letting you sense people fresh ly in th <.: good-
ness of th ei r being, whi le cognizant of th e subtle layers ofs u[fering
in all our lives. Such compassiona te percep tion is like beholding a
painting by a great master, a wo rk of art that mysteriou sly expresses
the treme ndous dignity of each of its figures. A few Dharma stu-
de nts have told me that they are sometimes so moved by the di gni-
fi ed presence of th e people around th em , on a street corne r, in a
bus or store, that they co uld weep with reverence for th em alL
Thomas Merto n w rites about a similar experien ce. He had spent
years in co nte mplative practice at a Catholi c monastery in Ken-
tucky, where he prayed, worshiped, and comm un ed with all others
in th e love of God . O ne day he went to Louisville 0 11 an errand for
the monastery. H e wro te:
In Louisville, at the co rner of fourt h and Walnut, in the

c<.::ntcr of the shopping di stri ct, I was sudden ly over-
w helm ed with the realiza tion that I loved all those people,
that they were mine and I theirs, that we co uld not be alien
to one another even th o ugh we were total strangers. It was

like waking from a drea m of separa teness, of spurious self-
isolation .... Then it was as ifT suddenly saw th e secret beauty
of their hearts, the depths of their hearts where neither sin
220 ~ A wakellillg Tllrollgll Love
nor des:i re . .. ca n reach , the core of th eir realicy, th e person

that eac h one is in God's eyes. If only they could aU see
th emsel ves as they really arc. If only we could see each other
that way all the time. There would be no more wa r, no more
hatred, no more cruelty, no more greed .. .. I suppose the big
problem wou ld be th at we woul d f..l11 down and worship
each other. 7(,
As you se nse th e tremendous di gnity of others, let yo ur attention

turn to the kinds ofp eop\e you hadn 't previo usly noticed- people
routin el y margi nalized and banished to th e realm of "strangers. " Pay
fresh attention to people in racial, ethnic, or social groups different
from yo ur own , those w ho are poorly clo thed or homeless, those
imprisoned in habits of addiction or ab use, those denigrated for their
sexual orientation , and so forth. As th e label "stranger" comes crash-
in g down , let the dignicy of each such person reveal it'ielf to yo u,
evoking your reverence and care. Recall such people later w hen
yo u meditate on compassion. Rem ember how it felt at times in your
life w hen others held you distastefully at a distance, w hen you were
judged or d ismissed as a stra nger, even if your experi ence was f.lr
less severe. Let such memories help you empath ize with what oth-
ers are feelin g, cmpowering yo ur co mpassion and ca rc for th em.
R ecen tl y Barbara,Jonathan, Da vid, and r took a walk in a nearby

park, li ngering to watc h some immigra nts from South Am erica play
a passionate , friendly game of soccer. Another time we passed chil-
dren at play under th e lovin g eye of parents and grandparents. How
na tural it is to recall th e spint of meditation in those moments, to

radiate care and compassion to all those "strangers," to connect with
th eir essential goodness while mindfu l of th e imperman ence and

sufferin g hidden with in all our li ves.
Lil/ing Life Anew and Embodying Deep Coodlless ."¥- 22 1
The Need for Mature Spiritual Community

Anyone can reali ze greater love, compass ion , and w isdo m by reg-
ularly practicing meditations like the ones in tlu s book. But indi-
viduals w ho try to practi ce o n their ow n, w ithout the support of
other pr:lctirioners, usually have difficulty slIstai nin g and deepenin g
th eir practice over the long term. In order to progress in o ur prac-
tice, we need support from peo ple mature in th e practice, ot hers
w ho share in the pure percep tion to w hi ch we are awa ke nin g.
There are several reasons for this.
The first reason is that meditations of impartial love and wisdom
are extremely chall enging on a personal level. T hese meditations
not only undercut o ur egos in their ways oflabcling and reac ting to
everyone, but th cy also challenge and shake up our attachm cm to a
particular social and cultural identity. Because we are lea rning to see
th e world in ways that many aro und us do lIot share, our process o f
awa kening can so metim es feel like a very lonely endeavor.
Most mcmbers of society are lIot regularly engaged in mcdita-
tions to awa ken impartial love and compassio n . Social disco urse
routinely characterizes people as objects of apathy, indignatio n , or
possessiveness, whi ch rein forces our own habit of doin g simila rl y.
We find supp ort fo r our self- centered visions of the world thro ugh
the social chatte r of the gro up we are in, w hi ch defines itself by

di stinguis hing its members from those in ot her gro ups w ho are
viewed as mere strangers. This is why peoplt: w ho identify most
strongly with an ethn ic identity, nation ali ty, or political party often
have diffi cul ty viewing people outside th eir group as fu ll human

bein gs, equal to th emselves in worth and dignity, whose funda-
m enta l needs and human po ten ti al are similar to their ow n . To

integ1.1te w ise, impartial love and compassion into one's life is cul-
tura ll y sub ve rsive. It chall enges the partialities assumed in every
society.
22 2 ~ Awakellillg Tllrollgll Love
R ecently , I taught a course on Buddhist meditatio n theory at my

unive rsity. Besides assigned reading, students were required to med-
itate each da y and to write about specifi c ways that study and med-
iL1tion illumined their lives, for most of them as practicing C hristians
and Jews. After months of sll ch practice, a student reported that dail y
mcditatio n was " blowing her mind," reve:llin g :l capacity for impar-
tial care th at she hadn 't known she had. " But," she said, "this prac-
ti ce is so radi cal- it opens up a way of seein g and respo ndin g so
different from what many others arou nd me are thinking and say-
ing. I can't imagine carrying this practice on just by myself, witho ut
the support of th e others in this class." That student had begun to
reali ze wh y spiritual community is indispensable in th e world 's tra-
ditions of spiritual practice and why sal/gha is o ne of the fundamen-
tal rcfuges of Buddhist tradition.
Wh en others around us actually embody th e impartial care, com-
passion, equanimi ty, and wisdom that arise from meditation, they
inspire and uplift lIS in our own practi ce-the enli ghtened qualities
they embody become real for us, not just abstract ideals. Those w ho
are spiritually mature from long practice excmplify what is possible,
demonstrating that we (all realize the same qualiti es if w e practice in
a similarl y whole-hearted way.
Also , inevicably th ere arc timcs on th e spiritual path wh en our
individual egos go astray. As we practice these powerful meditations

in a sustain ed way, various spiritual experi ences and epiphanies
occur, and w e may get over-excited by th em. At o ther times, when
meditation doesn't seeJll to go well, we may feel overwhelmed by
distraction , lethargy, or personal difficulti es and feel like giving up

the practi ce. We Jllay sometimes get lost in perso nal fantasies of spir-
itual greatn ess or unworthin ess, holding ou rselves back fro m fur-
th er progress through spiritual pride or self-deprecation . We may
start to tak e ou rsel ves much too seriously. To help cut throu gh all
such decepti ve mental states, we need to rel y on other practition ers
w ho have meditated lo nger than us, w ho know firsthand w hat we

are undergoing from their own experience. Such spiritual friends
are essential CO provide us with wise input, ad vice, and encourage-
me nt. T hey can also demonstrate how progressi ng spi ritually ca n
improve our sense of humor.
The Path <if Awakmillg [5 [IItrillSically COIIIIII,,"al

There is an even Ill o re fundame ntal reaso n w hy the path of enlight-
enm ent unfolds w ithin spi ritu al community. The enli ghten ment of
a buddha, by its very nature, is /lot an isolated atta inment. T he path
of full est enli ghtenm ent is intrinsIcally commun al, always in rela-
tio nship w ith others. beca use w hat we awake n to is the loving co m-
passion that we share with others, w hich is grounded in the nature
of mi nd beyo nd sepa ration from others.
We awake n beca use others have awakened before LI S and radi-
ated their w ise love and compassion to us, tri gge ring ou r own
process or awake nin g. When our practice becomes strong. it si mi -
larly inspires o th ers in widening circles of illuminati on. T hat is why,
as noted ea rlier. fu ll enlightenment is imaged as a lu minou s buddha
that joyously radiates th e liberating powers of love and w isdom to
widenin g circles of bod hisat tvas and beings. By in tebrrati ng our med-
itatio ns into o ur lives, we similarly awaken to w idening circles of
co mmuni o n and pure perce ption, spiritual co nn ec ti on and COI11-
munity, to bless, inspire, and support each other on th e pat h. The

circle of support w ithin one's own spiritual comm unit y pro vides
the secure fo undation from whi ch to exte nd impartial, e nduri ng
love and co mpassion to numerous other bein gs.

Authentic spiritual masters emerge from within such mature spir-
itual commun.iti es to fun ction as teachers und er th ei r auspices. For

thi s reason, when you find a spiritual teacher w hose teachin g res-
onates deeply w ith your heart, you often discover that his or her
spiritual community is also your OWI1.
Transmission and Guidan ce fro m Awakened Teachers
Spiritual teachers, such as those quoted in this boo k, rook up prac-

ti ces of wisdom and love with such dedica tio n that th ey became
co nduits of inspiration and guidance for many others. But th eir
development did not OCCUT in isolation. Earli er in th eir li ves they
found tcachers who embodied th e enlightened qu alities that they
so ught. From such figures, they received transm issio n and teachin g
over th e years. They also reli ed on their teac hers' spiritual co mmu -
niti es for encouragement, advice, and support. That is how they
learn ed CO practice so effectively. Eventuall y their authorizing teach -
ers and cOlllmunity requested them to pass o n w hat th ey had
learned. As the proverb says: " It takes a village to raise a child. " It
also takes an experienced spi ritual conullunity to raise an awake ned
reac her.
R ecall that o ur practice is to awaken pure perception, ro let th e
buddha in us perceive th e sacredness of beings and the primordial
purity of things. Authentic teachers of love, compassion , and wis-
dom have realized such perception through th eir training. By prac-
ticing similarly under their guidance, we seek to do th e same. If no
o ne had eve r awa kened in such a way, there would be li ttle reason
to believe that we could. Because others have so awa kened and
knowledgably tra nsmit the requisite practices, we can do likewise.

A mature relationship with a spiritual teac her is an apprenticeship in
awakening.
Pure perception, as noted, is not pass ive. In Tibeta n Buddhist tra-
ditions, the teac her's awakened buddha nature co mmun es with and
helps evoke the correspo nding enlightened potential w ithin the stu-
dent. As s[Udems we cooperate with this process by envisioning our-

selves receiving the liberating powers oflove and co mpassion from
spiritual teachers and benefactors, then mergin g w ith them ill the
infinite ground of those energies: primordial awareness. As our
buddha potential awakens , it radiates th e same liberatin g powe r of

love and w isdo m to man y o thers.
COflllfctillg with a Spiritual Teacher

For our practi ce to deep en, th erefore, It IS a profound help to
reco nnect with ou r teachers repea tedly so as to receive co ntinuin g
tran sm issio n, inspiration, and instru cti o n that accords w ith o ur
de veloping experience . It is an inco mparable boost to joi n w ith
them in meditation retreats or workshops that th ey offer. There, we
experience the inspiration of deep practice w ith them, along with
the opportunity to ask q uestions that have Jrise n from our matur-
. .
lI1g expen ence.
H ow to find th e right spiritual teacher(s) for yo u? One way to
explo re this is by readin g books or essays wri n en by teac hers who
have lo ng train ed in the spiritual tradi tion of your intc resc. You may
also anend th ei r talks, workshops, or shorr retreats. Your teachers
would be the ones who speak most profoundly to you o n all lev-
els-whose ways of conul1unicating open your heart and mind, trig-
gerin g your own uniqu e process of awakenin g. In the end on ly yo u
ca n dete rmine who that is. A great crowd may gather around a spir-
itual fi gure whose way of teaching is not effecti ve for yo u. Your
best fri end may benefit from the instruction of a teacher wi th w ho m
yo u ha ve no such co nn ec tion. You hav e to ex plore by reading,

attendin g teachin gs, and goin g to practice se nin gs guided by teac h-
ers, until YO ll find so meone w ho conullunicates so well to yo ur fun-
damental concern that you know yo u have mu ch to lea rn frol11 him
or her.
H ow to tell if a spiritual teacher is effective? T eachers can take
many fonns. Some are always gentle, waml and kind , yet may never
trul y chall enge yo u to improve yourself. Some are mo re abrupt, ye t
may challenge yo ur patterns of self-grasping in all th e ways that help
yo u progress. One good way to determine th e effectiveness of a
teacher is by observing his or her students over time. Arc a number

of them becoming the deep , wise, and compassionate sort of peI50n
that you seek to become ? Then their teacher is guiding them well.
Oc ace th e students beco ming ideologues, bcittle in theic beliefs,
espo using the dogmas of a reli gion w ithout embod ying its dee p
qualiti es? T hen th eir teacher has not been effective in their trainin g.
Avoid teachers of any tradition w ho require their communiti es to
become islands unto th emselves, expec tin g their students to cut off
communi ca tio n wi th family and friends-noej ust for th e period of
a m edicatio n retreat but perman ently. Spiritual prac tice sho uld
increasingly inform all rel ationships, not become a means to hide
from th em in cult- like isolation .
In sum , we rely on awakened teacheI5 to percei ve the enlightened
potential in us, commune with it, and evoke it. We rel y o n th em to
perceive and chall enge the self-cli nging we don't ye t sec in o ur-
selves, so we ca n learn to offer oUI5cives more full y to the practi ces
that bring ou t self- transcending w isdom and love. We rely on th em
for o ngoing transmission, instructi on, and advice.
In medi tatio n sessions, as we merge into o neness with o ur spiri-
tual teach ers in the luminosi ty of love, compassion, and wisdom,
we are effectively uni ting with all previo us generati ons of teachers
w ith w ho m o ur teachers similarly united. Throu gh thi s profound
practi ce, we discove r ou r underlying identity wi th generations of

spiritual masters in the undivided natu re of o ur minds. Such prac-
tice helps wake lip our hidden po tenti al to become like them.
Bodhichitta: The Spirit of En lightenment

The Spirit oj EnJightetJllletJt ill Aspiration
Someone may fi rst take interest in spiritual practice to improve hi s

life. But practi ce doesn' t j US[ improve your life-it also newly
defin es th e m eaning of you r life. The process of awakeni ng is uniqu e
for each individual, but conunon stages of spi ri tual development ca n

be disce rn ed-progressive stages throu gh w hi ch practitio ners
awak en to a deeper sense of life's purpose. Wh at follows are a few
highljghts of spi ritual development that I've o bserved in dedic<l ted
pr<lctitioners of T ibetan Buddhism , a Mahaya na tradi tion centered
on th e bodhisa ttva path of enli ghtenm ent. Non- Buddhi st readers
may explore how th e stages o f development desc ribed here mi ght
shin e light up o n analo gous stages of th eir own conte mplati ve li ves.
After a prac titi oner has lea rned to integrate th e power of medita-
tion into many aspec ts of her life, she increasingly senses th e sac red-
ness o f eve ryon e around her. It becom es clear th at th e pure
percep ti on of her medi tation sessions is not just a fa ntasy. R ath er,
meditation hel ps unve il what had previously gone unnoriced: the
in trinsic goodness and immeasurable worth of everyone.
At so me point the practitioner reali zes th ere is no reaso n for the
basic perspecti ve of wisdom and love to stop at th e end of her med-
itation sessions. Those states of mind are th e natural response to what
medi tation reveals: the intrinsic puri ty of things and the underlying
nature of bein gs. We can always relax into th e natural wisdom that
recognizes the pri mordial purity of things; we ca n always commun e
with the prim o rdial goodness ofbenef.1 ctors and bein gs in love and
co mpass ion. Ic's just a marrer of rememberin g to do so, of lea rnin g
better to abide in our own dee pest response to what is.

Over months and yea rs of such practice, supported by her work
with spiritual teachers and communi ty, a practiti oner sta rts to not ice
signifi ca nt cha nges in so me of th e members of he r commu nity.
They are becoming less brittl e and self-ce ntered, less superfic ially
j udgme ntal, more reverent of everyone, loving, and wise. She rec-
ognizes, perh aps to her surprise, that such changes have been hap-
penin g in herself as well. As she practices with her teac hers an d
merges into oneness with them as benefactors in daily medi tation ,
she senses more an d more how the love and wisdom tra nsmi tted in
their teac hing and energy has bee n helping to trigger her own capac-
ity for love and wisdom- how the awakened buddha potential in
th em has been evokin g th e corresponding potential in herself. She
now realizes tha t she has long been held by her spiritual teac hers
and bene£1Ctors in a protective field of pure perception and compas-
sion, no matter w hat negative thoughts she had about herself or oth-
ers. Now recognizing this, she feels tremendous gratitude. She may
sometimes weep wi th re verence and appreciatio n at the mere
thou ght of her teac hers.
As ht'r nonconceptual wisdom also deepens, she lea rns to relax
1110re full y into th e nature of her mind beyo nd clingin g, where
she increasin gly experiences th e spo ntaneo us liberati o n of deluded
thoughts and reac tions-deep, blissful freedom from rhe ca us es of
sufferin g. " Freedom from sufferin g" is no longer an abstrac ti on;
she is actu a.1ly lea rning to experi ence it fi rsthand . At the sa me time,
medication practice is bringing out her inn ate love for beings with
increasi ng fo rce and inclu sive ness . Without equi voca tin g, she
tra nsmi ts love not j ust to a few humans but to all; not just to
humans but to aU sensate crea tures. In addition , her compass ion for
beings in ten sifies as she lea rns to abide in the un conditioned free-
dom of th e nature of mind and understands benc r th e layers o f
con diti oned sufferin g that th ey undergo for not yet recognizing
such freedom.
All th ese enli ghtened qualities- wisdom , love, compassion, and
their libe rating energy- manifest more and more stro ngly in her
and others in her co mmuni ty. And she understa nds: " It is beca use
our spiritual teac hers acco mplished th ese qualities th at their teach-
ing and ene rgy are evoking our potential for the sa me." From her
own ex peri ence she now knows the li berating power that enli ght-
ened beings embody for others. R.ecall th e story about Kisa Gotami,
the young woman who mourned the dea th of her child and then
discovered her grief as a hnk to compassion for oth ers. When thi s
insi ght dawned , she excla imed: " This is what th e Buddha, in /lis
co mpassio n, has seen! " At that moment she realized how the
Buddha's own rea li zation enabled him to gu ide her to th e same real-
ization . At this stage the practitioner is ha ving a similar recognition:
her teachers' profound awakening is what enabled them to inspire
and guide her own awa kening.
And it dawns on her: " The purpose of these spiritual practices is
not merely to improve my life. Rather, th e purpose of my life is to
accomplish th ese practices-to attain freedom from the inner ca uses
of my own suffering and to completely reali ze the wisdom, love,
:lI1d energy that are needed to help many others do the same. That
is w hat my tea chers accomp bshed, and that is w hat I must likewise
do." A powerful aspiration wells lip to fo llow in the footsteps of her
teachers, her deepest spiritual benefactors, to praC[ice so thoroughly
th at she unl eashes th e full liberating power of her enlighte ned
potential for the sake of all.
In Buddhist traditions of India and T ibet, this da wning realization
is called the arising of bodhichitta-the spirit of eulighlclllllclIf. Bodhichitta
is the buddha capac iry long hidden in our minds by ego-clinging,
w hich ha s the ever- present potential to wake up and manifest its
liberatin g qualiti es. Through the stages of development noted above,
th e practitioner's capaciry of bod hi chitta begins to awaken in a deci-
sive way, brea kin g into consciousness as a powerful aspirati on to

full y m:l.l1ifes t its enli ghtened qualiti es. When this happens, it feels as
if an enormOll s force of will has eru pted from th e depths of one's
mind- the spirit of enlighten ment is roaring.
Mi chael Himes explains some th ing intriguin gly analogous in

Christian understanding. Father Himes says: " How do we discern
the wi ll of God for us? .. God 's will is not the will of some other per-
son out th ere so meplace with which we are supposed to bring our
will into line .... T he will of God is the will within and beneath my
will .... To find th e will of God, don ' t look 'ou t th ere'; drill down to
the deepest dep ths of your ow n will, and th ere you will discove r th e
will of God ," n
W hen bo dhi chitta brea ks into consciousness, it feels as though
your tru est, iml10st will is finally manifestin g, the profound aspira tion
to reali ze all enlightened qualities of yo ur buddha nature: the inner
knowledge, compassion, skillful means, and liberatin g power th at
can tri gger t he awa kenin g of many others, This is w hat Indo-Ti betan
traditi on calls the spin'( of elll~g ll (emll C/lt ill aspiratioll. Wh en thi s aspira-
ti on emerges in a powerful , steadfast way, one has beco me a bodh i-
sa ttva, Bod"li is Sanskrit for "enlightenm ent," satt lJa for " perso n." A
bodhis:m va is a person who embodies th e spirit of enlightenm ent,
At th is poin t the practitioner is thoroughly disgusted wit h fi' uit-
less atte mpts to find lasting happiness by clin ging ro trans ient, co n-
ditio ned ci rcumstances, Instead, she feels a solemn respo nsibility to
realize th e un conditio ned wisdom and love that actua lly provide
las ti ng j oy and [Q help many others do the sa me, She knows li fe is
short and ca n end at any time, W ith an urgent se nse of respo nsibil-
ity, she req uests her teac her to fo nnali ze her entry into the bodhi-
sa ttva path , by transmittin g th e vow tha t prior bod hisa ttvas have
ta ken,
Taki/lg the Vow of the J3<Jdhisatt vas

The bodhisattva vow is transmi tted in a ceremony passed down from

th e great bodhisattva masters ofln dia and T ibet , The stud ent kn eels
beforc her teacher, palms pressed togeth er, envisioning and rever-
encin g the grea t masters of the past, from the Buddha to her prese nt
teacher, Wi th all of th ose masters as witness, she takes refuge in the

three jewels- Buddha, Dhamla, and Sangha-and repeats a solemn
vow after her teacher to fully reali ze the quali ties of enli ghtenment
for the sa ke of all bei ngs. In Tibetan trad ition , th e vow is often
recited in the words of the grea t Indian bodhisattva, Shantideva:
Lil/ing Life Anew and Embodying Deep Coodlless ."¥- 23 '
Just as budd has of the past generated th e spirit of enlighten-

m en t and progressively acco mplished the training of the
bodhisattvas, so I give rise to th e spirit of enlightenment and
w ill progress ively accomplish those trainings for th e sa ke of
the world.7>I
" I give rise to th e spirit of enli ghtenme nt" expresses bod hi chitta
in aspiration- the resolve to fulJ y reali ze her enli ghte ned potential
for th e sa ke of all . Therefore, like prior buddhas and hod hi sattvas-
including the spiritual teachers who guided her in this life-she
firm ly vows to mak e her whole life into a practice of awakening.
The next ph rase expresses that commitment: " [I] will progressively
accomplish those [bodhisattva] trainings for the sake of the world."
This vow impels th e emerging bodhisattva to mak e every activity
into a mea ns to realize her enlightened potential of w isdom and
love, thereby evoking the sa me pQ[emial in others.
The Spirit of Enfight"'''''''t ill Actioll

To take this bodhisattva vow and th en put it in to action by [rain ing
in the practices of a bodhi sattva , constitutes what Indo- Tibetan tra-
di [ion calls 'he spirit of ellligluell lIIellt ill actioll (bod hi chitL1 inaction). 79
To make such a vow is a joyful moment, for the new bod hi sa n va
has now stepped onto the bodhisattva path that culmin ates in th e
enlightenment ofa buddha.8{l It means she has tak en lip her deepest
purpose as a human being. Shantideva's next verse expresses this joy:
Now my li fe has borne great fruit; human life well obtai ned.
T oday I am born into the Buddha's family. Now I am the
Buddha's c hi ld.'11
He nceforth , eac h da y th e bodhisattva recites th e vow wh il e

visua li zin g the budd has and bodhisattvas befo re her. Such daily
repetitio n imprin ts th e bodhisattva resolve deep into th e prac ti-

tioner's mind, so the spirit of enli ghtenment may infoml her life and
draw her back to the bodhisattva path from li fe time to lifetime, un ti l
she is fully awa kened .
Practitio n ers don 't have to go thro ugh all the stages of spiritual
progress desc ribed above before receiving this vow. Many people:lt
an ea rl y stage of th eir practice requ est th e bodhi sa ttva vow from
thei r teache r in order to inspire and suppo rt th eir development to
th e poin t of actually ge neratin g th e spirit of enli ghtenm ent in aspi-
ratio n and ac tio n.
After th e bodhi sa ttva has given rise to th e spirit of enlighten ment
and ta ken t he vow, his path unfold s by deepenin g his practice of
wisdom and love, w hich comprise the ultimate and relati ve aspects
of bod hichitta. Ultimate bodhichitta is th e no nconceptual w isdom
th at recognizes th e e mp ty, in fi nite, and un divided nature of mind
beyo nd all partialities. Relative bodhichitta is the bo un dless, impartia l
love and co mpassion that arise natu rally fro m such wisdom. W is-
dom and love are to be culti vated no t just in meditatio n sessions but
at all times, everywhere. Wh erever you are, w hateve r YO Ll are
doi ng, yo u are lea rnin g to be fully prest"nt to self and o thers wi th ill
the natural state, the w isdom beyond clingi ng, and to commun e
w ith o th ers and respond to th em in th e pure perceptio n of love
and co mp assio n.
At thi s stage th e spirit of enlightenm ent becomes the o rgani zin g
princi ple of the practitioner' S life, defining its purposes and arrange-
ments. In o rder to ful fill th e bodhisa ttva vow, o ne may choose to be
a mon k, nun , or lay prac titi o ner. Mo nas tics mai ntain hundreds of
disciplin ary vows tha t keep their lives foc llsed excl usively 0 11 the
Dhaml a, w hi ch helps maintain the disciplinary power and puri ty of

the tra diti on for future genera tio ns. They have the o ppo rtunity to
train in monasteries, traditi o nally the ce nters of intensive Buddhi st
learni ng and practice in Tibetan culture.
T ibet has also produced a great many enlightened lay adepts:

powerful lamas, teachers, yogis, and yoginis, such as Padmas..1lllbhava,
Yeshe Tsogyal, Machig Labdron, Marpa, and Milarepa. A lay bodhi-
sa ttva trains ex tensively with his teachers and in centers of Buddhist
lea rning and medita tion, but then contributes much to the world by
en tering into all aspects of ordinary life as means of awa kenin g. For
exampl e, in our ti me a lay bodhisattva may explore how f.1l11ily life,
work life, leisure activity, and social service ca n support wisdom and
love in self and others. Mod ern societi es need more bodhisa ttva
mothers and fathers, doctors and nurses, teachers, social workers,
coac hes, leaders, officials, and policemen. Si nce the contemporary
world is not likely to become as heavily monJSticized as Tibet, th ose
who learn to cransform lay life into a field of awakening pcrfonn an
invaluable service for future generations. Man y laypeople and monas-
tics mai ntain intimate relationships of mutual support and lea rning as
the Dhan11a cominucs to plant new roots in co ntemporary cultures.
Whethe r th e bodhisa ttva is a layperson or a monasti c, to accept
the spirit of enligh tenment as th e directive force of his li fe redefines
his approach to spiritual practice. Before th e arisi ng of bodhichitta,
the practitioner sought to integrate spiritual practice rl/irh his life, as
if each part of his life had its own autonomous purpose and practi ce
was to be add ed on to that. For exa mpl e, th c practition cr th ought
his purpose for going to th e grocery store was mJinl y to get gro-
ceries, and whil e he was th ere, he would also try to integrate th e
perspec ti ve and energy of his m editations . After he gives rise to
bodhichi tta Jnd has beco me a bodhisa ttva, he rCJlizes that spiritual
practi ce is th e main pu rpose of each part of life. Eac h situatio n is

viewed as a means to evoke and express his enlighte ned potential.
Now th e main purpose for going to th e grocery store is to abide in the

wisdom of natural awareness, full y present, and to sense Jlld respond
to all the people arou nd him in love and compassion. Groceries are
purchJsed in order to support th e life dedicated to sll ch practi ce.
Similarly, before giving rise to bodhichitta, a practitio ne r ma y

work in a j ob mai nly to earn money for food, rent, and so forth .
While there , he tries co recall his spiritual practice. Aftcr givi ng rise
to bodhichitta, dl C bodhisattva goes to work each day so as to fur-
thcr rcalize and embody wisdom and compassion in action, in ways
th at ca n inspire O[hers to realize their best potential. The mon ey
earn ed frol11 work goes to support a life ce ntered on that purpose.
One yo un g Ameri ca n educator who had mcditated for seve ral
yea rs went to see his spiritual teach er, a lama. Th e yo un g man,
enthusiastic at how wcll he was integrating practice in to his life, told
his tcac her: " The effects of these meditJtions are pouring into each
part of my sc hool day, tran sformin g my wo rk as a teac her." The
lama gazed at him for a momcnt, then replied: " Educating others,
in itself, is 110[ your life work. Your life work is to rcali ze your full
pote ntial for wisdom, love, and compassion. Your job as an ed uca-
tor is the form throu gh which to do th at." The lama was pointing
to the difference between merely integrating spiritual practice with
your life and recognizing thc spirit of awakening as the very purposc
of your life. The lama was helpin g thc young man to realize that he
could shoot higher- he could be a bodhisattva .
A bod hisa ttva doesn' t live to ea t, sleep, and have a roof over his
head. He eats, slee ps, and has a roof to support a life lived in th e
spirit of enli ghte nm ent. H e doesn't li ve just to undergo pass in g

experi ences. He undergoes many kinds of experi ences, some pleas-
ant, so me unpleasant, as a mea ns to draw out hi s wisdo m, empath y,
and compassion. He doesn' t have a famil y j ust to fulfill his needs,
expectatio ns, or to ward off loneliness. His f.1mi ly se rves co evoke his
love, patience, wise presence, and care for them . Within fa mily life,
sti ch attitud es are refin ed, tested, hon ed, and strength ened . Then
th ey ca n be exte nd ed to many others, w ho also do n' t exist j ust to
fulfill his own needs and expectations. The bodhisattva's family, and
ultimately th e whole world, are sacram ents of awakening.
Lil/ing Life A nelll and Embodying Deep Coodlless ."¥- 2 35
The Six Transcendental Virtues

of the Bodh isattva Path
T o practi ce the bodhisattva path is to enga gc all simations and inter-

ac ti o ns as ways to evoke or express the spirit of enlightenme nt. T his
all-encompassin g fi eld of acti vity is encapsubted in six rYallsrClldellTal
lJirtr lcS (Sanskri t: paYamitas) also translated as th e "six perfection s").
They arc " transcende ntal" because th ey are all expressio ns of deep-
est wisdo m , the pure awareness that transcends all grasping.
Trm/scclldcll ta/lIlisdolll) the sL'(th virtue, is the stabl e recognition of
th e nature of mind: limitless openn ess and awareness undivided. It
is also the non conceptua l w isdom of emptin ess that tran scends grasp-
ing on to self, to other, or to action as independent from eac h o ther.
Fro m such w isdom fl ows tremendous love and compassio n for all
bei ngs w ho undergo sufferings ca used by graspi ng o n to self and to
dual ism. A bodhisattva enacts the love and compassion of transcen-
dental w isdom throu gh the activities of the o th er five vi rtu es: ge n-
erosity, moral discipline, patience, enthusias ti c perseverance, and
mcditative conce ntration. These five areas of activ ity are also called
the skifljitf lIIeaw of transcendenL'll wisdo m , beca use they are ways to
care for others that skillftilly evoke th eir deepest goodness, th eir ow n
potential for wi sdom and love.
The divisio n in to six virmes organizes all the practices of wisdo ll1
and love previo usly desc ribed into six basic kinds of prac ti ce. To
take one area of life as exa mple, let's briefly t:x plo re the six tran-
sce ndental virt ues as th ey may take expression in th e family li fe of a
lay bodhisattva.
Generosity in volves offering yo urself to others by giving whateve r
is needed. It becom es a transcendental virtue in f.1mil y life when

YO ll are full y present to your family in th e natu ral awa reness and
love that transcend clinging to self and o th er. From that genero us
place of openness, acceptance, equan imity, and communion , you
freely offer your time, energy, matcrial means, pro tectio n, knowl-
edge, and ca re to your fa mily. T o abide in natural awareness is to
take j oy in th e very being of your partn er, children, or oth er rela-
tives, beyond anyone's map of sel f~conce m ed expectati o ns. To be
so full y present to your f.'unily an d to embody tha t in nu mero us
small gestures of kindn ess, attentio n, :md love is a gi ft th at blesses
th em to un cover and grow into their bes t sel ves.
Moral disciplillc means to refrain from hannin g others in th o ught
or deed, ell lti va tin g th e potential of goodn ess in o neself and others,
and actin g benefi cially for others in numero us ways. It becomes a
transce ndental virtue when you recogn ize th e empty esse nce of your
mind 's habitu al reactions as they arise, so th :"\[ self-ce ntered emo-
tions spo ntaneously release into their basic ground of empry aware-
ness instead of dri ving hannful actions. Fro m within that sta te of
inn ate w isdom, yo u ge nerate mu ch karmi c merit by co mmuning
with yo ur f.1 mily and all others in love and co mpassion- perceivi ng
and evoki ng their innate goodness. Fro m that perspective and atti-
tude flow m any gestures of care and respec t fo r yo ur partner and
children: sorting th e mail, w ashing th e dishes, collecting the trash,
making the bcd, helping with homework-performin g f.1mily tasks
with full attention, presence, reverence, and joyfuln ess.
Pariellce in cludes patience w hen others prese nt diffi culties fo r you ,
patience with your ow n sufferings, and patience w ith all the chal-
lenges of spiritual practice. Patience beco mes a transcendenta l virtue
w hen it fl ows fro m the w isdom in the n<l ture of mind, the unco n-
dit io ned, u nchangi ng nature of o penn ess and cogni zance th <l t is
neve r threa tened or harmed by changi ng circumsta nces. Fro m this

wisdom flows co mpassio nate p<l ti ence w ith partner, chjld ren, and
self, through understanding the reac ti viry and suffe rin gs that trou-
ble all w ho have no t yet fo und stable recognitio n of th ei r mind's
nature. In additio n, to practi ce within fa mily li fe and spi ritual com-
munity som etim es feels frustratin g, sin ce your own ego-clinging is
regularly challenged in new ways. All such circumstan ces ca n

enhance the patience of w isdo m and compassion-by res ting
di rectl y in th e empty essence of those expe ri ences or by recogn iz-
ing eac h difficllity as a bridge of empathy to many o thers wi th sim-
ilar difficu lties.
Ellr/lIIsil1srir perSflJeml1Ce is deltght in th e spirit of enli ghtenm ent, in
th e practi ces th at express it, and in th e chall enges and difficulti es of
spiri tual li fe. It beco mes a transce ndental virtue when it fl ows frol11
the bo undl ess joy of unco ndition ed freedom w ithin the natural state,
beyond self-ce ntered anxieties or inhibitions. This is a j oy that rec-
ognizes th e deep mea nin gfulness of every aspect of life. In li ght of
the spirit of awakenin g, eve n problems and diffi culties posed by oth -
ers o r by your own ego reactions are seen as meaningful, sin ce they
ca n all serve as means to purify your mind, to generate compassio n,
and to ex tend the recognition of emp ti ness to in creasingly difficul t
aspects of expe rience. In f.1mily life, enthu siasti c perseve ran ce is
delight in th e mea ningfuln ess of every activity do ne for you r child
o r partner- the joy of offering yourself to them , such as by doing
laundry, changi ng diap ers, feedin g children, rea din g them stories,
and putting th em to bed.
Tral1scwdelltl1l meditative COllwltmtioll, in this context, is th e calm,
stable powe r of un conditi onal love and compassio n th<lt ex presses
the innate stability found in th e unconditioned nature of mind. The

bodhisattva draws upon th e natural power of concentrati on th at is
always ava ilable in the m.ind' s very nature: rhe innate tranq uilli ty of
emptiness and pure aware ness.
TrallSCelldetlll1/ wisdom, again, is th e natural wisdom of infin ite

open ness and cognizance rhat transcends all graspi ng. Whe n o pera-
tive in eac h o f the oc her vi rtu es, it turns them into trallscelldelltl1/
vIrtu es.
Besides f.1mil y life, a lay bodhisattva applies th e sam e six virtues to
all other areas of life: strength en111g hi s generosity, care, patience,
perseve rance, atte ntio n, and wisdom within hi s work life, in his
selVice to the work of his spiritual teachers and conUllullity, in offer-
ing himself in various ways to the people of his neighborhood o r
tOWI1 , in leisure time w ith family and friends, and so forth.
The bodhisa ttva 's practice of th e transcendental virtu es generates
th e kam,ic m eri t and wisdom to take him to fi.lllest awaken ing while
inspirin g othcrs to reali ze th eir own correspo ndin g potc nti al ofwis-
do m and love. In th is way, th e bodhisattva's actions help tri gge r the
process of awaken in g of many others. 82
Further Practices to Evoke and Express the Spirit of

En lightenment
Wi th the guidance of her teac her, a practitio ner of T ibetan
13udd hi sm may en ter imo furth er prac tices to help purify th e men-
tal patterns that obscure her enlightcilment potential, to ge nerate
vast karmi c merit, an d to deepen her nonco ncep tu al w isdom. In
Tibetan Buddhism, these include the foundational practi ces (llgolldro)
of Vajraya na: solemnly reaffirmi ng her refuge and bodhisa rrva
resolve, offeri ng every part of her world to enlightenment, purify-
in g ncga ti vi ties, and unitin g w ith lineage teachers. To hel p furth er
evokc th e qualiti es of her innate buddha potential, her teacher may
also 3ss ist her entry in to tantri c deity yogas. In 3dditi o n, Pf3ctitio n-
ers of thc Dzogche n tradition engage in special fo undati onal prac-
tices of body, speech, and mind, as well as other prac tices to elicit
visionary dimensio ns of enlightened awan;:ness. N3
All such practi ces are ways to fu rther rea li ze and embody th e qual-
ities, e nergies, and powers of the spirit of enli ghtenment: the innate
potentia l of wisdom an d love th at we h3ve been cul tivatin g

throughou t this book.
Epilogue
s I SIT DOWN TO WR IT E th e final scerion of thi s book , J

A realize it is September 11, 2006, the fifth anni versary of
the tragic an ack on the United States by terrorists frolll abroad.
Today, politicians across America are di sc ussin g ways to protect
Americans from their enemies-mostly through strategies of self-
defense. Ce rta inly nations must take measures to pro tect th eir peo-
ple. Hut if we wa nt [0 be protected, we should foc lIs Jn cnri o n not
only o utward tow ard potential sources of violence aga inst lIS but
also in ward at our o w n attitu des toward th e masses o f people in th e
world, many of whom sympathize with those who oppose us.
In o ur econo mi c, political, and military relations with people of
other natio ns, do our actions express ge nuine concern for th eir lives
or cyni cal anemprs [0 gain con trol over th em and th eir resources? It
will never be e nough for leaders to postllre as if they cared about th e
peop les of oth er lands without ac tually acting accordingly. Unless, as

a peop le, we genu inely wish for th e well- being of people in other
nati o ns. and act co urageously from that moti vatio n o ver the long
teml , no mil itary solution will be enough to protect us. Go vcmm ent
and military leaders who care deeply for th e peo ples of other cul-
tures, and embody that concern through concrete actio ns , wield JlllfclJ
grea ter po wer to protect their own people. General George M ar-
shaH's reconstru ction efforts in Europe after the Second W o rld W ar
exemplifi ed this. Gandhi 's successful work fo r Indian independence
embodied his cOll cem fo r both the Indian and British peoples.
I hope that readers from diverse walks of life, religious traditions,

and cultures w ho enter into the meditations and teac hings of thi s
book receive inspiration and blessin g for th eir li ves. In a class on
Buddhist meditation I taught last spring, stu dents kept journals on
how the meditations of natural love and wisdom informed th eir
lives, mos t o f th em as C hristians, Jews, :md so forth . One student, a
devout Ca th oli c, had this entry in her journal:
Today after meditating, I spontaneously w rote thi s:

" If yo u steer from fear, and cling to no thin g,
you'll find freedom to give and joy to sin g.
Ya ll ' II kn ow who you are, held from above;
yo u' ll know the Truth that God Is.
.. .you'li know God is Love."
These medi ta ti ons from Buddhism helped deepen her f.lirh in th e

reali ty of Cod as unco nditional, all-embrac ing love. From suchjour-
nais, I also received inspiration and light for my own spiritual path
as a Buddhist. I hope the practices in this book help people of dif-
fe rent f.l iths, and no fonnal faith, enter similarly into a dialogue with
Buddhist tradition of deep muwall earnin g and apprecia tion.
I pray that Buddhist readers among you, throu gh th e meditations
of thi s book , find inspiration to strength en your participation in th e

spirit of enli ghtenm ent and to empower your refuge in th e prac-
tices, conU11unities, and teachers that most effecti vely support yo ur
awakening.
I pray th at th ese m editations inspire grea ter wisdo m, patience,

and compassio n in £.l milies and conullunities that so des perately
need morc of those qualiti es. May these meditation s help Clit
through the inner ca uses of prej udi ce, hatred, and violence that
lie hidden in all our minds. May [hey empower people to reali ze
th eir best potential and find joy in thei r wo rk and in th eir service
Epilogue ."¥- 24 '
to others. May these practices support people who work for a hap-
pier and safe r world: leaders in government. international service,
the milita ry , those who care for children, work for peace, assist the
troubl ed, treat th e sick, help the elderly , the homeless, and th e
dying, feed the hungry, protect animals and the environment. May
those who practice these meditations realize the nature of their
minds, spontaneo usly embracing all others in th e soothing radiance
of love and compassion. May the spirit of enlightenment bless every-
one CO awaken to hi s or her deepest potential. May th e path of
awakening unfold in the most effective way for eac h person.
To you, th e reader, I mak e this request: please never give up on
yourself When yo u feel dejected, remember your benef.1ccoTS and
receive their radiant wish for your deepest well-being and freedom.
Each one of us is held in a power oflove and awareness beyo nd our
conception . The blessi ngs of enlightenment are alw ays pouring
forth. This troubled world is just waiting for us to receive them, to
realize their source in the very gro und of our being, and to extend
the same bless ing unconditionally to others.
Notes
I . For furth er d iscussion ofch e need for i111partiallove to respo nd to vio-

knce and oppressio n, see J ohn Makransky, " No R ('ai Protectio n with-
o ut Auth entic Love and Compassion ," j Vl/ m(/l of BI/ddt/ist Elllies 12
(2005), pp. 25-36 (on line journal).

2. Nyoshul Khcn Rinpoc he and Lama SUI)'J Das, N mllml Great Peifectioll
(Itha ca, NY : Snow Lion , 1995), p. 86.
3. Alison Luce rman , "A t rhe Co rn er $wre, " The 5 111/ 324 (D ecem ber
2002), p. 4 1.
4. N yoshul Kh c npo and Surya Das, Natllwl Great Perfectio/l, p . 82.
5. Nyoshul Kh enpo and Surya Das, Nat ural Great Perfectioll, p . 107·
6. Nyoshul Khe npo and Surya D as, J\ latllral Gre(/( Perfectioll, PI' . 70--7 1.
7. Forsome Illodt'rn socia l implications of traditional Buddhist diagnoses
of ca uses of suffering, see David Loy, n,t Creal Awakellillg: A B1Iddhist
Social TlICtlr)' (Boston: Wisdom , 2003).
8. Oilgo Khyt:!' ntsc Rinpochc and Matthi cu Ricard. n,c Spirit of Tibet:
Th e Life (///d /I!lorld I?f KII }'e//tse Rillpocite, Spirill/al Teacher (New York:
Aperture Fo undation, 2000) , p. 52.
9. N yos hul Khcnpo and Surya Das, N(/ w rat Grear Perfectioll , p. 79·
10. Nyoshul Khen po and Surya Das, Na il/rat Cre(/I Perfectio/l, p. 59.
II. Tibt'can Buddhist practices o f refuge and u nio n are explained in com -
mentaries ava ilable in English. Tulku Thondup has made them acces-
sible in 11,e He,,{iIlJ? Power oj Milld (Bosto n: Sham bh ala , 1996), pp.
165-73. Also see Sogyal Rin poche, Tibetall Book of LiI';II~~ alld D}'il~i,!
(N ew Yo rk : HarperColJins, 1992) , pp . 146-49 , and Dilgo Khycntse

244 ~ Awakellil/g Tllrollgll Love
Itinpochc, Excel/ellt Path to EII/ ~ghtl'llme/lt (Itha ca, N Y: Snow Lio n ,

1996), pp. 29-36, 73-86. The practice in this boo k of receiving and
uni ting w ith ou r benefactors in unconditional love is intended fo r a
w ide p ublic to find simple, direct entry into the heart of such pr.tc-
ti ce and for experienced Buddhist meditators to help enh ance their
pracci ce.
] 2. Kh yentse and Ri card , Spirit if Tibcl, p. 45.
] 3. N yoshul Kh enpo and Surya Oas, N arural Great Perfectiol/, pp. 6 1, 73.
]4. For examples of such inquiri es imo th e nature of mi nd in th e Nyin gma
O zogche n and Kagyu Mahall1udra traditions, see , ('.g. , Tulku Urgyen
Itinpoch e, A s It Is, vol. II (Kathmandu : ll...angjung Yeshe, 2000), pp.
[6 [-62; N yosh ul Khcnpo and Surya Das, N atural Great Perfectioll, pp.
6 1, 73 , 1 18; Lo ngc hen R abjall1pa, Bllddha Mil/ d, tr:lI1s!aced by Tulku
Thondup (Ithaca, NY: Snow Lio n, 1989), p. 36 1; Dakpo Tashi N :l.ln -
brya!. Clarifyillg the Nall/ral State, translated by Erik KUllzallg (Boudha-
nath, Nepal: R angJu ng Yeshe, 2001); La llla Surya Das, Nall/ral
Radiallce (Bo ulder, CO: Sounds Tme, 2005), pp . 47-5 4; Ken M cLeod,
Wake Up to Your L!fe(New York: HarperColiins, 200 I), pp. 353- 4 to.
15. Th is inc isive expressio n, " cut the kite-string on th o ughts," is from
Lama Su rya Das.
16. Kh yentse and rticard, Spirit o.fTibcf, p. 52.
]7. From th e Pali IIi!lIItlaka in J ack Kornfi eld , TIWhill.f!S 4 tile Br /{ftllw
(Boston: Shambhala . [993). p. 11 2. I retran slate Pali PUIIIW as " kanlli c

m erie" and //I etta as " love" to confonn to the lL ~age in thi s boo k.
IS. Nyoshlll Khe npo and Surya O as, Natural Great PeifcClioll, p. 120 .
19. For accessible modern Introductions to the practi ce and theory ofrhe
Na tu ral Great Perfection tradition discussed in th is ch apter, see

Nyoshlll Khenpo and Surya Oas, N awral Great Perfectioll; Khyentse and
R icard , Spirit oj Tibet; La ma Surya Das, N(/fl/ral R tUli(lIlu; C hokyi

N yillla R inpoche, Prcselll Fresll Wakefll/ll ess (Kathmandu: R angjung
Ycs he, 2002); T so knYI H,j npoche, Fearless Sill/lJlicit)' (Kath mandu:
R angjung Ycs he, 2003); Sogyal ltinpoche , Tibetal/ Book cif Livillg and
Nores ."¥- 245
DyillS (New Yo rk: H arperCollins, 1992); and N amkhai Norbll , Th e

C rysM/ (/Ilt/ til(' W(/y of U gllt (New York: R oud edge. 1986). For classi-
cal Tibetan exposition of Dzogchen, see Longchen Rabjam , Ti,e Prac-
rice £!f D::ogcllell, translated by Tlliku Thon dllp (Ithaca, NY: Snow
Lion, 2003). com ailling extensive translation fro m th e collected works
of th e grea t fourteenth -cenwry D zogchen master Longchen Rabja m .
Also see Longchen Rabjam , 71,e Preciolls Treasury of fhe W(/)' of Abid-
ing, trans lated by R ichard Barron Oun ction C ity, CA : Padm a, (99 8)
and Lo ngch e n R abjam , 77,e Preciolls Treasury q{ II,e Basi( SpII(e of Plle-
1I0 1ll ella, translated by R ichard Barron Ounc{ioll C ity, CA: Padma ,
200 1).
20. Shantideva, Bodll ic/wrym)arara, S: 129, my translation .

21. Gospel cif AI/aullew 7.1 -3.
22 . This disClission of karmic cause and effect is not exha ustive. It concerns
a few key po ims critical to in[onn our practice both in m editation and
everyday lifc. Further points w ill be made in fo llowing chapters. O ne
foclls here conce rns the distin ction made in Buddhist Abhid harma
treatises between prim ary ca uses and secondary conditions for pleasant
and u npleasant feeli ngs: th e primary cause of pleasa nt feelings being
past virtu e, of unpleasant feelings past nonvirtue. O n this, see Abhi-
dharl/1(/h)sh(/-bh(/shy(/, 4:45-4 8, 56 (th e manual of higher Budd hist swd-
ies by th e fourth-century Indian m aHer Vasubandhu). Also see th e fi rst
Dalai Lama' s commentary 011 chapter 4 of Vasubandhu 's text: Mdsod

til.: III(/r 1(/111 s(/I byed (analyzed in John Makrallsky, " A Ph enome nolog-
ical Srlldy of Buddhist Karma Theory," PhD research paper, 1982). A
second foc us here co ncerns karmic remllS simil'Ir ro rhe mllse (Sa nskrit:
lIishY(llldllplwl(/, T ibeta n: gyll lIIellgyi drayb/l), the tendency, imprinted

by one's past actions, to react sll11ilarly ag3in and again from habit and
to experie n ce o neself also , in a broad sense, as the object of sll ch
actio ns. On th is, see Abhidlwnllakosha-bhashya, 4.85, elaborated in

Yangsi Ri npochc, Pracricill,ll rile P(/tll, (Boston: Wisdom , 2003) pp.
173-'74, based 011 Tsongkhapa's Great Trearise 011 rI,e Stages IIf file Pmh .
Fo r further detail o n bnna doctrine, sec T sang kha pa, Crem T reatise 0 11
the Stages (if tlu? Path, vol. I, U<lIlslated by the Lamrim C henlllo T ransla-
tion CO lllmittee (Ithaca , NY: Snow Lion , 20(0), pp. 20<)-46; Kangyur
R..inpoche and Jigm e Lingpa, Treasllry C!r Prcciolls Qllalitil'S, trans1ated by
th e Padmakara Translation Group (Boston: Shambhala . 200 1). pp .
43-64 . For incisive co ntemporary Buddhist w riting on bnlla, see Scck-
;I ~~ ,he Heart (f Wisdom by Goldstein and Komfield (Boston: Shambhala,
1987). pp. II [- 26, and Praaicillg the Path, pp. 1554>4.
23 . Shantideva expresses the futility of sel f-cen tered strategies for happi ness
in another verse: "In the desire for happiness, o ut of del usion, [beings]
destroy t heir own happin ess like an enemy." S:l11tideva, Bod/,ictlrytl-
II(I/tlf(/ , translated by Kate C rosb y and Andrew Sk ilton (N ew Y ork:
Oxfo rd Un iversiry Press, 1995), 1:28.
24. N yos huLKhenpo and Surya D as, Ntlillmi Cre(/( Peifc(fioll, p. 58.
25. O n cnlig htenment taking fonn within a pure realm o f radi:mt ac tivity.
blessing, and communion , see Jo hn Makransky, " 13udd hahood and
Buddha Dodies," in Ellcyclopedia C!f Bllddhism edited by R obcrt Buswell
(N ew York: M acmi llan , 2004), vol. I, pp. 76,9 ; joh n Makransky,
Buddha/lOod Embodied (Albany, NY: State Un iversity of N ew Yo rk .
1997). pp . 54-5 9, 104-8 ; j ohn Makransky. " Tathagata." in Ellcyclope-
dio of RcJ~~io ll , 2nd edition, edited by Lin dsay Jon es (D etroit: M acmil-
lan , 2005), vol. 13, pp . 90 15- 17. For dep ictions in Tibetan art, see for
exampl e: M ary li n Rhi e and Robert Thurman , Worlds of Trall~form a

fioll; Tibetll// Art (f Wisdom alld Compassioll (N ew York: Tibet H o use,
1999), pp. 449-84.
26. Tho mas Merton , New Seeds of COllfempltltiml (N ew Yo rk: N ew Direc-
ti o ns. /961 ). p. 25·

27. Santidev3, Bodllicllaf)'avaf(/ra, 3:1 8, trans. by C rosby and Skilto n.
28. "or all [objects] the essential original nature is boundless; o f bei ngs
likewise the essential ori ginal nature is boundless. As the essen ti al orig-
in al nature of spa ce has no limits, just so the wisdom of the W orld-
kn oweno [buddhas] is boundless. Verses 011 fllc Pcrren ioll of l¥isdOI/l , II.
Nores ."¥- 247
10, translated by Edward Co nze in The Peifcaioll of r,yjSt/OIl/ ill E(~11t
TIIOIlSa/U/ Lilies alld lIs Verse SUII/mary (Berkeley: Four Seasons Fou ll-
dation, 1973), p. 14·
29. Nyoshul Khenpo and Surya D as, Nalllmi Great Peifectioll, pp . 42-43.
30. Nyoshul Kh enpo and Surya Das, Natural Great Peifwioll, p . 59.
3 1. From Mellll SIIIf(J in Tellcllillgs <!f ,he Buddhll, edited by j ack Komfield
(Boston: Sh ambha la, 1993), pp. 6-8. I replace "one" w ith "yo u ,"
impli cit in the Pali, to rcrail1more of the rh etori cal power of the text.
32. Bobr Rinpoc he, CI,CIlfCZ;g: Lord oj Love (San Fran cisco: C lea r Point
Press, 199 1), pp. 14- 15.
33. C indy Fabri cius-Segal, "Blessings in Disguise," TI/C 51111 333 (Septem-
ber 2003) , p. 34·
34. Lucy Garbus, The 51111 342 Uune 2004), p. 40.
35. Lama Surya Das, A lIllIkellillg Ihe Buddhisl Heart (New York: Broadway,
2000). pp. 194--95.
36. On furt her supportive contemplations to infonn love, com passion, and
wisdom, see the D alai Lama, All Ope" Heart (New York : Little, Brown
:md Company, 200 1); Geshe j am pa Tegchok, T rtlllljonllillg '"l' Hellrt
(Ithaca , N Y : Snow Lion , 1999); Lama Surya Das, AWllkenillg ,he
Brlddhisl Hearl.
37. See Sogyal Rinpoc he, Tiberall Book of Livillg alld D yillg, fo r an acces-
sible introduction to the clea r li gh t nature of mind and its relation to
gracious livin g and dying.

38. Adapted (i'O Ill two versions of the sto ry that appear in the Slllll y"lla
Nikaya and the Chillcsc Surra oj 42 Seaiolls: Bhikku Bodhi, editor and
translator, COI/J/eacd Discourses qf Ihe Buddha: A Tralls/ario/l oj the
Samyr/((n N iknyn (Boston: W isdom , 2000), pp 255-56; Donald Lopez,

edicor, Re/~I!ioll s oj Chilla ill Praaicc (Prin ceton , Nj: Princt'con Uni ver-
sity Press, 1996), pp. 365-<i6. 1 give than ks to Todd Lewis, j ames Uenn,
Franz Metcalf, Guang Xing, and Richard H ayes fo r finding these ref-
erences for m e.
39. Nyoshul Kh cnpo and Surya Das, Narural Great Perfectioll, p . 137.
40. A no te fo r scholars: Pure perception (T ibetan till,g //tillS) is cod ified in
Tibetan Buddhism as one of the central practices of the Vajrayana tra-
diti o n. Because Dzogchen is understood to ex press the ve ry essence o f
Vajrayana , pure perception becomes a central theme here . Themes of
pure perception are also prominent in Mahaya na scriptures and com-
mentaries that preceded and con tributed to the emerge nce of
Vajrayana traditions in India : e.g., perception by tran scendental wi s-
dom ofche intrinsically pure such ness of beings and thinbTS as elaborated
in Pr(YlI(t-paralllita scriptures and Maitreya texts, pure perception of the
innate buddha nature of each being as elaborated in buddha nature lit-
erature, and so forth. See Makransky, BllddlwllOod Elllix)(/ictl, PI'· 4 ' - 54,
3 2 3-]5 .
41. Khycntsc Rinpoehe and R icard, Spirit of Tibet, p. 82.
42 . A no n- Buddhist pra cticing th ese meditatio ns should in cl ude wi thin
the benefactors that merge into her heart whoever she believes to be
IllOSt deeply spiritual figures. Buddhists identify such fi gu res as buddhas
and bod hisanvas, includin g their own spiritual teac hers. A C h ristian
might think instead of C hrist, Mary, or th e commu nion of saints, a
J ew of most cherished prophets and rabbis, and so fort h.
43. Michael H imes, Doillg the Tnuh ill uJlle (New Yo rk : Paulist, 1995),
pp. 10, I I , 18. Also see Jo hn Makransky, " Buddha and Christ as Medi-
ators of Ultimate R eality: A Mahaya na Bu ddhi st Perspective ," in
Buddhism alld Christiallity ill Dialoglle, cd. by Perry Sc h111idt-Leukcl

(Norwich, Engla nd: SCM , 200 5), pp. 176-2 11.
44 . Tatlla,gata,<!arbha SHira translated by William Grossnick 111 Donald
Lopez, edito r, Buddhism ill Practice (Princeton , NJ: Princeton Univer-
sity Press, 1995), PI'. 95-96 ff.

45. Several early Mahayana com mentaries proclaim that the full enlight-
enment o f a buddha embodies itself in three basic ways. ( I ) D harma-

b ya (embodi ment of the real) is a buddha's fu ll real ization of the
infinite, empty, luminous nature of min d. Since budd hahood is one
with th e deep nature of reality as suc h (dlwn/w-ftJ), that is its ultimate
Norcs ."¥- 249
body (I.!(/y(/). (2) Sa mbh oga-kaya (embodime nt in comm una l joy) is

the luminous energy of dhannakaya as it ma nifests in radiant form, (Q
commu ne joyously with circles o f bodhisattvas who are receptive (Q
the joyful , li berating powers of enlightenment. (3) Ninna na-k.,ya (cre-

ative embodiment) is buddhahood as it creatively and spontaneously
expresses lib er:lting tnlth ro ordinary beings through persons, phen om-
ena o f nature, ritual fornls, works of art, and so fo rth . See Mak ransky,
BllddlJalwod Embodied, chaps. 4, 5, and 13·
46. T o p:lrticipate in th is purer dimension of reality broadly corresponds
to what Vajrayana Buddhism desc ribes as participati on in a mandala of
Uu dd ha activity, see C hagdud Tulku's Gates to BuddlJisf Praaice Qunc-
ti o n C ity, CA: Padm a, 200 I), chap . 16; R egi nald Ra y, Secret of tll C
Vajm 11Iorld (Uosro n: Shambhab , 2 001), chap. 7.
47. " No Mirrors in M y Na na's House," Sweet Ho ney in the R ock, Still
011 liJej QllnI(,Y (Redway. CA: Eanhbeat! R ecords, 1993).
48. We see the connection between the ultimate equanimi[)' of w isdo m
and the relative equa nimity o perative in love and compassio n in Per-
fection of W isdom scriptures of early Mahayana Buddhism . For exam-
ple , Conze, Perfectioll of Wisdom ill E~ftht TI/OI/smul Lilies, p. 199, shows
the ll10vemem from ultimate equanimity (the wisdo m th at knows the
undi vi ded, ultimate nature of beings) to relative equ ani mity (the
impartial and indomitabl e love that a bodhisattva extends to beings).
Page 235 lists the four boundless attitudes-boundless love, comp:lS-

sion, joy, :l nd equanimity, while equ:lting th e last w ith th e perfection
of wisdom itsclf-- th:lt wluch discerns [he true nature of ph(;'nomcl1:l.
The S:lI11 C occurs in th e larger Perfectioll if Wisdolll Surra: Edward
Conze , Th e L"'J!c SHIm (III Perfect Wisdom (Delh i: Mo ti lal Banarsi dass,
1979), p. 442.
49. M atthieu I~card , tra ns., The LiJc oj Slwbkar (lch:l ca, NY: Snow Lio n,
200 1), p. 4 22. M y gratitude to Bob Morri son for pointin g out th is
passage.
50. E.A. Uu rtt, editor, T cachillgs oj the COIII/,assiol/i1fc Buddha (N ew York:
250 ~ AwakelliJlg Tllrollgll Love
Mentor, 195 5), pp. 43- 46; Eugene Wa tson Uurl ingamc, trans.,
Blldt/ItiSf Legellds in the Pali text of the D ham mapada Co mmema ry
(Cambridge, MA : Harvard University Press, 1921 ), Harva rd Oriental
Series, vol. 30, pp. 165-66.
51. Ranjini Obeyesekere, Ponrairs '!f HI/ddhisf Womell (Albany, NY: State
U niversity of New York , 200 1), p. 137.
52 . Dalai Lama , Open Hearl, pp. 9 1, 93·
53 . See Dal:.i Lam:. , Opell Hea rl, p. 92; Dalai Lama , Til e Good Hearr
(Boston: Wisdom , 1996), pp. 69-70.
54 . Dalai Lama, Opell Heart, pp. 93, 95·
55. Dzogc hen Ponl op Ri npoche, TmillillSs ill COIII /Jassioll (Ithaca, NY :
Snow Lion, 2004), p. 18.
56. Kathy Hall, Til e S IIII 315 (March 2002), p. 35.
57. Dalai Lama, Opell Heart, p. 102. Cf. R..ingll T lI lk u, PtlIh to Budd/wllood
(Boston: Shambhala, 2003), p. 6 1: " Co mpassion becomes very vivid
when we see that the suffenn gs, althou gh clearly o llln ipresent , are in
fact base less and so easy to eliminate. What separates beings fro m lib-
eration is such a thin partition! And ye t, by ignorance, by misunder-
standin g the tru e nature of things, th ey suffer intensely and needlessly."
58. Gampopa,jculf/ On/mllem qfLibaalioll (Ithaca, NY : Snow Li on, 1998),
p. 130; Z hechen Gyaltsab R inpoche, Parh oj Herocs, vol. [J (Oakland ,
C A: Dharma, 1995), pp. 306-7; Dzogchcn POll lop, Tmillill.l!s ill C OIII -
passioll, pp. 2 1- 22; R ingu Tulku , Parh to Budd/whood, pp. 5[, 6 1.

59. Nyoshul Khe npo and Surya Das, Natllral Grcat PcrfcclicHl, p. 120.
60. Khycncsc Rinpoche, Spirit if Tibet, p. 86.
61. Tho mas Cleary, trans., Zen Alllics (Bosto n: Shambhab , 1993), p. 2.
62. Merton , Ncw Sectfs 0JColl1emp/atiotl, p. 57·

63. Zhechen Gyaltsab, Pmll if Heroes, vol. II , p. 30 I.
64. In Z hechen Gyaltsab, PlIIh oJ Heroes, vol. II , pp. 366-67.

65. Zopa R.inpoche, TrallifjmJlill,g Problems itlw Happilless (Boston : Wis-
dom, 200 1), p. 42.
66. On transm utin g d iffic ult experiences into the path of enlightenment,
Norcs ."¥- 2 51
also scc Gcshe Rabten and Geshe Ngawang Dhargycy, Advicefrom a

Spiritlfal Frielld (Bosron: W isdom . 1984). pp. 65-69: TlIlku T hondllp,
EIl/tr!/IICIICt/ Livillg (Hong Kong: Rangjll ng Yes he, 1997), pp. 11 7-29.
Also see refe rences in the prior two endnotes.
67. Zhechen Gyaltsab. Parll clj Heroes, vol. II. p. 413.
68. Dil go Kh yentse Rinpoche , EllligJuelled Courage (Itha ca, NY : Snow
Lion, 1993), p. 52.
69. For examp les of using such inquiries in d1.ily !ife, see references in prior
two notes; and Chagdud Tulku , Cates (() Buddhist Practice, pp. 11 - 13 ,
22- 23·
70. From a ca rd that H..inpoche se nt to his students in '994.

7 1. Cf. T so ngkhapa's Great Treatise, vol. 2, pp . 44- 45 , wh ich draws upon
th e writings. of Kamabshila.
72. l-licard , Ufe of S/lfIbkar, p. 4 22.
73. C( Surya Das. Na ruml Radillllc(', pp. 63-67; Tulku Ur~,')ren ll...inpoche.
Rail/boll' Paill/jl~t( (H o ng Kong: R angj lln g Yes he, 199 5), pp . 59""-66.
74. N yoshul Kh cnpo and Surya Das, N atllml Great Perfectio/l, p. 46.
75 . Nyoshul Kh enpo and Surya Das, Natllml Great Perfection, p. 46.
76. Thom as Me rton , COlljeCIllres cif a Guilt)' B),sllIlIder (New York : Image,
1989). pp. 1;6-58.
77. Himes, Doing If Ie Tnllli ill L.we, p. 56.
78. Shantid eva and Ngul ch u Thogm ed, Bodhisalll1a-c//(/r)'(/f/(/tara (llId lIS
COlll lllellfar)' (Sarnath, India: Sakya Students' Union, 1982). p. 164. My

translation of chapter 3, verses 22- 23, from the Tibetan.
79 . Ma llY Dharma books transla te the same Tibetan tenn,jll,\! 1M)' SCIII , as
"engagin g bodhich itta. " I think " bodhichitta in action" becrer
exp resses th e meani ng of the term.

80. To take sincere refuge in the qualities, practices, and embodime nts of
enlightenme nt marks entry into the path of enlightenme nt as noted in

chapter 4. But en li ghtenment can be viewed mainl y as the attain ment
of o ne's own fre edo m from suffenng (personal nirvana) or as the atta in-
ment of the enli ghtened power to trigger man y others' reali zation of
252 ~ Awakellillg Tllrollgh Love
freedom (active nirvana , buddhahood). To give rise to bodhichiua in

a steadf.1st way is {O Hep decisively o nto the path to buddhahood. the
bodhisattva path.
8!. Shantideva and Thogmed , Bodhisattva-dlllrm/(/wra, p. 165 , chapter 3,
ve rse 25.
82. For more extensive contemporary present:ltions of rhe transcendent.11
virtu es (perfectio ns), see Lama Surya Das' book: Buddha Is as Buddha
Does (Harper San Fran cisco, 2006); R eginald Ray, Illdestmrriblc Trufll,
pp . 336-46; Yan gsi Rinpoche, Practicing the Path, pp. 353 - 477 . For
classi cal presentations, see T sang kha pa, Greal Treatise, vo l. 2, pp.
85-224; Kan gyur Rinpoche and Jigme Lin gpa, Treasury (if Preciolls
Qllalities, pp . 190-268.
83. On Vajr:lya na founda tional practices, see Jane Tromge, N..!!olldro CO III-
melltary Ollllction City, CA: Padilla , 1995); Patrlll Rinpoc he, The
Words cifMy Perfect TeaclH:r(San Francisco: HarperCollins, 1994): Di lgo
Khycntsc Rinpoche, £ wcllcllt Patll to EIII((?/IIClllllem (Ith aca, NY: Snow
Lion, 1996) . O n Vajrayana creation and com pletion stage pldctices in
the contex t of Dzogchen and Mahallllldra , see R eginald Ray's
ove rview, SerfCr oj rhe Vajra World ; D ilgo Kh yemse Iti npoche and
Patm l l't.inpoche, Heart Treasllre <if Ihe ElIliglllcl/('d O"es (Boston: Sha m-
bala , 1992), pp. 55-146; Chokyi Nyima R in poche and Karma Chag-
mey Rinpoc he , Ti,e Ullioll oj Ma/wllllldra and DZ(~i!("e/I (H ong Kong:
Rangjull g Yeshe, [989); Tll lku Urgyen Rinpochc, A s It Is, vol. I

(H o ng: Kong:: Rangjung: Yeshe, 1999).
Dzogchen found ational and visional)' practices are just men tioned
briefly in books since they are more fully tau ght only in meditation
retreat with qualified teachers. On Dzogchcl1 fou ndational practices

distinguishing dualistic, ego-cemered mind from rhe infmite nature of
mind , see the section on "sharp inquiries" in chapter 2 of th is book ;

also see Lama Surya Das, Nall/fal Radial/(c, pp . 47-5 4; T soknyi Rin-
poche, /f (/rless Sill/lJlicit)' (H ong Kong: R angj ung Yeshe, 2003), pp.
11 6-44·
Index
A exte nding love and, 80--83

Abhidhanna, 2 4 5 11 22 importance of, 24-25
addictio n, 108 pure pern:ptio n and , 133, 135- 36 .
anger. 7 1. 211. 21 5 139-3 6
boundless love and , 105. 106 purpose of spi ritual practice and, 4 J
compassion :Ind . [90. 192, 193, [98 relative practices and, 48
equani m ity and, [51 samsaric m aps and, I 15
ka rllla and. 72, 73--74 takin g rd uge and, 80--8 1, 124- 25
anxiety. 37, 66, 162-6J. 165--66, 171. Bible, 14 3. See also C h ristianity
51'1' also fear Bin Laden. Osam a. 127, 130
" At the Corn er $ Io re" (poem), [9-2 1 blessings, xxiv, 16, 18 , 80-81,24 1
ato ms, 56-57 bo und less love and , 98~)
attachme nt, 92 natural awareness mtditation and,
:tVt'rsion . 66. 97-)8 . lOS 51-53
awa re ness bodhichiua , xv, 78, 89, 23 1
arising and d issolvi ng phe nome na in actio n , 2 3 1- 34-
and, 58-60 compassion and , 189
bo undaries of, 6 ) d escribed, 226-34
natllr3i. meditation o f. 49- 51, N yo sh ul Kh en Ri npochc on, 206
8 1- 82, I}O, 1)9- 100. [67, q 8, rdative/ultimate, 232
T7o-rJ! bodhisattva (s). xv- xvi. 30, 79

compassio n and , 127
U co nceptual practices and, 48
Baghdad, [25. ScI' als/) I rag path, six transcende ntal virtues of.
13ankc i, 179--80 235-38
Barn well, YS<IYC. 148-50 pure perceptio n and. 145
& 'IUtlifil! M il/d, A (film), 13 I spiritual com lllu nity and . 22 3

benefactors. 26. 30-)2. 51 , 63 , 86, 187 vo ws, 230-3 1
bo undless love and, 98, I ' 5. 120, bo d y. See a/so b reath
12 4 - 2 5 bound less love and , 99- 100

compassion and , 24- 25 . 161 , 169. natural awareness m editatio n and,
' 7Cr-'7 1. 178. 187. 191-93 51-52
concep tual p rac tices and , 48, 49 pure pe rception :lIld . 138 . 142. 145
disco vering. 21 - 2 4- sleep and, 2 13-2 14
e mbo d ying goodness and , 20 [ ,229 Bo nhoefer. D ietric h, I 16
Uoston. xx-xxii. 74. 143, !!~I Chokyi Nyima Rinpoche, xxv. 89,
Uaston College, 74, 143 , 36
breath, 49-50, 52, 8 1-82 , 99- 100, Christ, X"..xii i, , 8, .:q , 31 , 86. Sec also
138. Sec a/so body Christianity
Bube r. Martin. 24 all j ud gm ent, 74
Buddha , 18.2],30-3 1.48,86 all love, 143
lxnef':1ctors and. 24. 3 I Christianity. xxiii. 86. 222. 229-30.
bodhis,1 ttvas and. 231 - 32 See a/so Uiblc:; Catholicism :
boundless lovc and. 95 . 96. 108. C h rist
12 5- 28 color, awareness of, 61
compassion and, 157. 16o---{I] communion, 143, 14 5
o n gifts, ] 2(r-27 com munity , spiri tua l, need for,
on h:ltfed, 128 22 1- 2 3
our innate nature and , 36-37. 38 compassion, xiv-xvi, x.xi, 123. See also
karm a and. 65,70, 75 empathy
Kisa Gorami :m d. 15 8--60. 164- 65. bcnrf.1ctors :lIld. 24- 25, 161. 16~.
[73-'74, 228- 29 170-'7 [, 178, [87, 1 9[~ 3
pure perception and. 132, [41 - 44 Dalai Lama on. 160, 163--64.
samsaril :lnd, 108 174-'75,25 0 n 57
Sh:ultideva on. 23 [ development of. 16o-<i5
buddha !latun:, 28. 35, 41 , 77, 79 dualism and , [07-108
compassion and. 178 embodying goodness and. 201, 221.
conceptual p ractices and, 49 224-26. 221'1-29
d cscribcd . xv e nlighte nment and . 78. 228-29
opcning of the mind :Ind. 88-89 extending. 46-49. 168--'70. 172
pure perception and, 133-3 4, 13 7, grca t , I99-200
144-45 kanna and, 64--66, 72-'75
taking n:fugc and. 125 liberating insigh t and , 55
buddha hood, 79. 88-89· See a/so n:'lture of mind and. 35. 36
enligh tenmen t n ew eyes of, responding to th e
boundless love and. 112, 122 world with thC'. 185-8 7
d efin ed. 122 practi ce of union :'Ind, xxiv
C'l1lightC'nmcnt and, 122 pure pC'fceptiol1 and. ] 45

pure pe rception and, 14 1, [46-47 recallin g, throughout the day,
Burma, xix 205- 206
burnout, ovel'coliling, xvii- xviv significance of, [ 58-60
social service and. 180-82
C spiritual community and, 221
calm abiding, 54-55 spiritllal teac hers and. 226

Catholicislll. 143, 184-8 5. 11 9.2 40. taking difficulties into. 188-<)9
Sec "/s,, C hristianity three levels of. 176-77
childrc n, 16-18.96. 185. 241. See a/so usc of the term , xv

pare nting concentration , transcendental Illcd ita-
benefactors and. 22- 24 tl\'l;, 235, 237. See als" calm abid-
sharing spiritual pracrices with, ing
2 1 7- 18 conceptu:'Il practices. 43- 49
con trol, surrendering. 49
[m/ex .,,¥- 255
cosmology. 186, 196 introductio n to. 33-68

"c urling thro ug h ," meditation of, samsaric maps and. 114. I 15
44-4 5, 14 5 Vaj rayana tradition and , 2481140
cynicism , 17
E
D educatio n. 234
Dalai Lam a. xxv, 18. 24 . 86. 116 ego, 28. 39, 88. Sel~ a/so self
on compassio n . 160, 163-64, boundless lo ve and, 9 5. 97.
174--'7 5. 2 5011 57 104- 108. 112, 11 5, 11 8, 120, 12 1
G cshc Sopa and . 153 calm abidin g and , 54
pllre perceptio n and, 135 conceptual practices and, 4 8
soc ial service and, xix - conditioning. sufferin g of, 16 1- 6 3,
on universa l respo nsibility. xvi 17 2
D :lrfur, U 5 cutti ng throug h and. 4 5
Day, D o rothy, 25 dualism and, 107- 10 8
de ath ,12 5.164.20 2.2 13 embodying goodm::ss and, 202- 204 ,
dcdication, 50-5 I . )3 - )4 221 - 22. 22 9
delusio n. 77, 197--98 t'nlightt'nm ent :md , 229
boundless love and, 10 4- 105 equanimi ty and, 152
compassio n and. 188 libe rating insight and, 55
seeing past. 13 1- 32 nature of mind and, 35
depressio n . 75, 190 patience and, 2 3 6-31
devotio n, 46-50. 63-65 pow er of goodness and, 79
Dhanlla, x..xiii. x.xiv. 28. 114 pure pe rception and , 133- 34, 14 2,
bodhisattvas and. 233 147, 154
compassio n and. 198 purpose of spiritual pr:acricc and. 4 1
defin ed, 122 samsasa and, 112, I 15, I 17
e mbod ying goodness and , 206 , sharp inquiry and, 57- 58
208-20<), 219, 230-3 1, 233 e l11otion (s) . See als(/ specifir ('IIl()tiolls
N yoslllli Kile n Rinpochc on. 206 bo undless lo vc and. 9 5. 97.
ta king re fu gc in , 230-3 1 10 4- 10 5
dllrmllllkaYII, 125 compassion and, 188-{)9
dignity. 17!J- 80, 21 8- 20 deluded, 104- 105

Dilgo Kh yentsc Rinpoche, 44, 58 , d ifficult, as a part of the path,
14 8. 177 193--94
o n del usio n, 64 , 197--98 embodying goodness and, 2 I0-2 1 I
o n pme pe rception , 133 inne r causcs of. 7D-7 1
dreams, 21 3 karma and, 7D-77
Drukche n Itinpoc he, xxv libe r:ating insig ht and. 55

dualism . 34. 4 5, 54. 10 7- 108 nature of mind and, 35
compassio n and . 178 empathy. III, 12 3. 160-6 1. Se( 11/50
pure perceptio n and. 133 compassio n

lJylan , Uob , 42 empliness
lJzogchcn Po ulop Rinpoche. 164 compassion and , t 57, 198
D zo gchcll tradition , xxii. x..... v, 157. liberating insight and . 55
2 16, 238 nature of mind and , 34-36
refu ge and . 125
e ne mies. 106- 108, 112- 113, 120. 121 freedom. 121 - 25. 152
compassion and, 183- 84 compassion and, 158, 165, 175.
extending refuge and, 123-25 178, 186, 192, 199
evil and , 129 pure perception and, 145
pure perecption and, 143
social activism and , 209 C,
cltiigluellmcll t, X'V. 22, 240, 24 1. Set" Gandhi. Mahatma. xix . 18. 116.239
Illso buddha hood generosi ty, 2]5- 36
in action, 231-34 genocide. 129
blessing of, xxiv Geshe Lobsang NalllgyaJ, 56-57
bodhic hiua and, 7R, 226-34 Geshe Ngawang Dharb'Yey, x.xv
bod hisattva s and, 230-3 1 Geshe Sopa. S I'I' Sopa. Geshe
boulldkss love and, 96. 118. 121 Lhundub
compassioll and, 157, 16 1--63, 172, Gcshc Tu btel1 T scring, 146-47
' 75, 180,18 2, lRR-R9, 192-93, gifts. 126-27
199 God, xxjji, 21. 143,2[9-20
conccptual practices and, 47 bCllcf.1ctors and , 3 I
delusion an d. 65 eyes of. I J2
em bodying goodncss and . 217 as love. 6S, 240
further practiccs to evoke and I11ncy of, 185
express, 238 pure perception and, 132
kanlla and, 50-51 will of. 229-30
natu ra l awareness meditation and, goodness. xiv- xvi, 93
50 boundlcss love and , 96. 106-107.
the mind and . 36, 88- 89 128-30
our rd:uionship to all others 3nd. compassion and , 179
7 8-79 conceptual practices and, 48
practice of union and, xxiv em bodying, 20 1- 238
pllre percepti on and. 145, 146 fundam ental. of all people, 9(i
revcn:ut devotion to the qualities kann:l and. 50-5 I, 70--'77
of, 46 nonconcepru al practices and, 66
spiritual co mmuni ty and , 223 powe r of, 42- 43 , H9- Ho
spiritu:11 tea che rs and, 224, 226 pure perception and, [34. ' 37.
stron g refuge :md, 13 I 140-42, 146-47
wisdom and, 90 radical. confronting evil with,
equa nimity, 36, 44 129-3 0
profollnd. 13 I- 55 seed of. 128- 29
relative killds of, 151- 53 greed, 104
of w isdom. ' 52-53 grief, 158-60. 165. 193

usc of the term, xv gll ilt. 162
ethnic prej udice, 74
evil. 74, 79, 12?-30 H

hallucinatiollS, 198-99
F happiness. xv, 95. 100-102
fcar, xxi, 35. 40. S('(' also anxiety kanna and , 70--'71, 75
boundless love and, 97-9 R, 10 2 Shantideva o n. 61.), 76-77
com passion and , 1(')3, 166, 171
[m/ex .,,¥- 257
Harry Potter I/Ild the CI/aIllI'eT of Secrets justice . xxi. 202

(film), 41
H arva rd University, 47 K
hatred, x.xi. 38-39 , 74. 76, 240 Kadam masters, xxv
boundless love and, 9 7-98, 10 2, Kabchakra , 1H
10 4, 128 kann a, 64-66, 203
Buddha o n . 128 boundless low and. 104- 106. 125.
compassion and, 179, 182-84 126
evil and. 128 compassion and. 191 - J!:I2. 194-96.
nature o f mind and, 35 198
sdfhood and. 40 ckscribcd, 40, 7D-77
healing, 35- 38. 1()5 and m erit, SO-5 1, 55, 192,236,238
hean, 1 17 positive, 75
hell realms, 186 structure of experience and, 7 1-74
H imes, Michael. 14 3, 229- 30 King, Martin Luther, J r .• xix. [8.24.
Hinduism. xxiii. 3 [. 86 116
Hiroshima. 125 Kisa G o tami, 158-60, 164- 65,
Hitle r. Adolf. 12 7. 128-30 173-74. 22 8-29
holy beings, 30 knowledge
home. arriving, 212- 13 nature of mind and. 35
hOlllclcssncss. 18 I . 220 nonconceptllal practice and . 43
tm st in the nature o f. 63-64
Kris hna, xxiii, 3 I
ignorance. 36-38
illness. ' 73--'74, 179-80. See also men- L
tal illness: suffering "leaning in ," past labels. 1 17
impartiality, 152 "letting go." 2 7-28
inclusivellcss. 152 love
India. 239 beyond boundaries, 46-·49 . 95- 1J I
inn ate nature. 36-38 embodying goodness and, 20 1- 238
inquiry, 55-62 endu ring. xix- x
imi ght, liberating, 55-5 1! entering th e p ractice of, 25-2t'i
1 l1Stitut~, of Tibetan Studies. ' 46 extending. 80-85. 92-93 . 11 6- 1!),

Iraq , 125 , 18 5,202 12 5-2 7
flllfillmcnt through. 6!)-7o
J impartial, xx- xxii
Japan. 124 karmi c power of, need for, 64- 66
Jesus. See Christ language of, 41-42
John. Gospel of, 143 as a the motive force for gen uim.~
j oy. 54- 5), 21 3 help. x'Vi-xviii
compassion and , 187-88, 19 1, 175, noticing, 11)-2 I
196 nourishing and protecting you r

e nli gh te nille nt and, 78 f.lmil y w ith , 2 14-2 17
Mertoll Oil. 87 pervasiveness o ( 15- 16
Judaism , xxii i, 31, 86, 222, 240 pure pe rception and, 131 -5)
judgm elU, 74 , 132 reawakening. 19-2 1
recalling, throughout the day, m em al illness, 13 1- ]2. 185

205-202 m cmonng,20g- 10t)
receiving, 15- ]2,26-32, 5 1- 52, M erton , Tho mas, 87, 184-8$,219-20
120, 137-40 Middle East. 202. &c <1lso Iraq
rediscoveri ng, 16-18 Milarepa. 77, 233
sdf- transo:nding. 9 8- 10 3 mind
thoroughness of. 85-87 buddha mind. 48
trust in the nature of, 6 3-64 distracting chains o f tho ught and,
llilkashing the po wer of. xiii- xxv. 62-64
6g-<)J enlightenment and, 36, 88- 89
usc of the term. 91-<)2 opening of. 88-8!)
vastness of. H7- H9 pure nature of. 33-36, 63- 64 ,
locati on. awareness of, 6 1-62 49-5 0
lotus flow ers. 144 morality , 235 , 236
Lmerman . Al ison , 19-2 1,4 1- 42 , 136 M other Teresa, xix, 18 , 24
motivltion. xi ii- xiv. xvi- xviii,
M xvi-xviv, 147-48
Machig Labdro ll. 233 Muslims, xxiii, 3 I. 86
Mahayana tradition, 227, 24HI140, mustard seeds, 159, 165
248n4 $, 2491148
Mandda, N d son. x ix N
Marpa. 233 Nash, John, 13 1, 132. 14 3, 188
mealtimes. 207, 2 13 naUlral aw are ness, m editati on o f,
meditatio n 49-5 1,8 1-82,90, <)9- 100, 167,
awakening pure pe rception. 137- 4 1 IJ8, 17D-72
conceptual , 43-49 Nechung itinpoche. 135-36, 142
of cutting through, 44-45. 14 5 N epal ,89
establishing a daily practice. 203-204 Nhat H anh. Tbich , xix, 25
extending love . 80-84 nirvana , 125. SI'I' als(/ enlightenment
integr.lting, imo each pan of your Nobel Prize. 13 1
d ay. 206-214 nonconceptual practices. 43-4 $,
of natural :l \vareness, 49-5 I , 81 - 82, 66-67, 88, 90
yo. !)Y- IOQ, 167, 138, 17D-72 Nyoslllli Khe n Rinpochc. xxv, 15,
nOllcol1ceptual , 43-45 , 66-67, 88, 34-37,5 8,86-<)0, 13 1. 136
90 on compassion, 176--77
rca li zing wisc compassion, 165-'73 concepUlal practices and, 45-46
reca lling the perspective of. d eath of. 47
throughou t the day. 204- 206 on Dharma p ractice, 206
receiving the healing trallsfonning illness of. 47

powe r o f love, 26-28 L.1ma Surya Da~ and, 1 14
retreats, 11$,2 14,2 16,2 18,225 Ilollcollceptual practices :lI1d. 44,
sel f- transce nding love. 98- 103 66,67

sharing, With chi ldren, 2 17- 18 011 puri ry of he an , 2 10- 11
taking difficulties into, 1!)O---<J9 on ou r relatio nship to aU others,
unleashing sd f-tra nscending love, 77-78
116- 17
[m/ex ."'¥- 2 S9
o s
olllniscience, 134 Saint Francis, 18, 24
others samb/lOga-kaYII, 145
exte nding lovc to. 82-84 samsara , 36-40. 77
love for, fulfillment through, ()()-70 defined, 37
mistaken impn:ssion of, 10 4 our map of, 103- 112, 120
Tt"alizing o ur intimate connection recognizing. 116- 17
to all , 77--'79 transcending, human capaci ty for,
IO<}- 11 6
p sangha , xxiv, 122,222,230
Padmasambhav<I, 233 Sarnath, 146
p:lramitas, 235-3S schizophrenia, 13 I. 132. 5 1'1' 11/$1) nlen-
p:lfc nting. xvii, 1 5- 16, 106 , 1O!)-I 0, tal illness
2. 14-2 17. Sec also c hildren self, 28-29, 6()-70. 51'1' al$() eg:o
p:Hh arising: and dissolving phenome na
bodhisattva, 227. 235-38 and. 58-60
difficu lties:ls pan of d1l;:. 193---94 boundless love and, 103- 104 .
nOl1 collccptual practices an d. 66-67 107- 108 . I I I
six transce nde ntal virtues of, 235-)8 compassion and, 164, 167. ' 72,
spiritual community and. 223 '74-"75, 17 8. 180-81. 189. 198
patience. 235. 236-37 dualism and, 107-108
Peace Corps, xvii , xxv e mbodying goodness and . 202. 204,
perception, pure, [3 1-55.224. &t' 2 19
a/s(I purifi catio n - b'T:lsping. J6-40
perfectio n, xxii, 2)5-38 medi tation of natural awareness
persevera nce, 235. 237 and , 49
Philippines, xvii mistake n impression o f, IOJ-1 04
Pol Pot, 127, IJO nature of mind and, 35. 36-38
Po nlop Rillpoelle. Dzogchc n. 164 noncoll ceptual prncticcs and, 44- 4 5
possessiveness. 35. 75-'76, 85 pure perception and , 133-35, 142,
prej udice. x..xi. 74 . 240 147
Princeton Uni ve rsity. ' ) 1 sharp inquiry and , 57-61
prisoners. cOlll1ScJing for. 108- 109 scm karpo (white mind), 77-"78
purificati on, 194-96. 198 sex education , 90
Shabkar l-!...inpoc he, 157. J 58. 1!J9-200
It Shakyamllili Ijuddha . See Uuddha
Ramakrishna. 24 Shantidcva, 69, 76-77, 86-87,
R311l311 3 M3h3 rshi, 25. 3 I 230-3 1. 24(, 112 3
rebirth. 196. 51'1' (1/$1) karma Shiv:!, 3 [

refuge, x."" jv-xxv. 4 8-52 . 80-8 1. 230 skillful means. 235
boundless love and. 98-<)9. 121-2 5 sleeping practice, 2 13-2[4
exte nding. 123-25 social

r~po l1 s i bj li ty, xvi , I JO activism , ] 82- 85.20<)
retreatS. 115.214.216.2 18. 225 service. xvii- xviv. 180-Ih
rigpll, 121 Son:l.I11 Tobgyal, Kh enpo, xxv
Itumi , 25 Sopa. Gc:she Lhundub xxv, 135, 152, 153
soul. )6 T
soup kitche ns,. 18 1 Tarthang TlIlkll , 194
spiritual teach ers Taf/tagafllgilw/Ill SII/(a (Bwid/Ifl Na lllre
connecting with, 225-26 Scrip/lire). 144- 45
li ncagc and. 23 8 teachers
selecting, 68 connecting w ith , 225-26
spiritual community and. 223 lineage and. 2)8
transmission and guidance from , selecting, 68
224- 26 spiritual cOlllllHrniry ;'Ind. 22 )
Stalin, J oseph , 127, 1.1 0 transmission and guidance fro m ,
stillness, 54-55 224- 26
strangers T eresa of Avila, 24
boundless love and, 97, 10 1- 102, T eresa, Moche r. Scc Moth er Teresa
105-108, 112- IIJ, 11 8-25, 129 terrorism, [25, 127. 1)0.239. Seen /so
compassion and, 168- 69, 172, viole nce; war£,rc
183-84 thought, d istracting cha ins of. 62- 64
dehlsion and , IJ2 T ibetan Buddhism. xv- xvi. xx ii
d ualism and, 107-108 tr:lIlscenden tal w isd om. 235, 237-38.
em bod ying goodness and , 21 9, 220 Sec Illso wisdom
evil and, 129 transience, suffering o f. 16t -63, 172
extendi ng refuge and, 123-25
pure perception and, I J 6 , 140, I4J U
s.' Ills.1fic lll:lpS and , 116--17 union , practice of. xxiv, xxv
social activism and, 209 University of W isconsin. 135
w ill to be free and , 12 1
subject and o bject, relation of. 45 V
Sudan, 185 Vajrayana practices, 2J8, 2481140,
suiTering, xxi . J9, 41 249 11 4 6
becoming conscious of our own. Vietnam War, yo
16J --64 violence, xvi. 76 , 239-40. 51'1' If/S() ter-
boundless love and, 95, 104-1 05, rorism: warf.,re
l oR, 1 I ) dual ism and , lOX
comp;'Issio n and. J 57- 6), 168-69, embodying goodness and. 202

175-'79, 186--87, [9 1--92, 195--99 solutions to, xx-x;"ii
of ego-conditioning, 16 [--6 J. 172 virtm:s, 235- 38
b rma and. 75
learning to cradle our, 165 w
nature of. insight imo, 16 1--6J warfare, 186, 202, 239. S('C Ilisa tc rror-
obvio us, 161-6), 172, 176 ism: violence

of transience, 16 1-63. 172 wisd om, x."'i:-xxii. 45
Surya Das, Lama, xxv, 47. 56 , 1[ 2, bodhichitta and , 2J2
114-16, [J6 boundless love and. 96--97,

Suu Kyi, Aung S;l1l, xix [0(}- 107, 112- 11 6, 119-2 1
Sweet H Olley in the R oc k. [48-50 compassion and. 157. 174-'76. [64.
sympathe tic joy. lise of the term , xv 18 7- 88
conct::ptllal practices and , 48
[m/ex .,,¥- 2 6 1
enlighte nme nt :m d, 228-29 y

equani mity and , xv, '52-53 Yeshe, Lama Thubtcn , xxv
karmic merit and, 65 Ycshc T sogyaJ, 233
language o f, 4 1- 42 yoga, 23 3, 238
love and, relationship between,
M\)--<)O Z
natural, 33--68, 204- 205 Zen Bliddhism, 179-80
no mishin g and protecti ng your Z hechen Gyahsab Rinpoche, 189,
(..mily with , 214- 217 197
practice of llll ion and, xxiv Zopa Rinpoche, L:lma , xxv, 11)4. [99
pllre perception and, 13 6-]7, 142,
14 K-5 0
spiritll:ll community and , 22 3
spiritual teache rs and , 226
t:lking difli culti es into, 188--90
taking sllffcring into, 197--99
transce ndental, 235,237-38
workplace
comp:lssion :l nd , 18 1- 82, 192--93
intcgrating mcdit3tiol1 into, 207- 1 1
pure perception :111£1 , 142
World Trade Cen ter, 125. See also
terrorism
World War II , 23\). See alSI) warf.tre
About the Author
OH N MAKRAN SKY h3.s pra c ti ced
J Buddhism since 1978. He co m-

bines an academic career as a professor of
Buddhism and Comp3rarive T heology at
Bascon College with his role as a lama in
the Dzogc hcn trad ition of Tibetan
Buddhism .
After studyin g for man y years unde r
Nyin gma, Kagyu, and Gelug teachers of
Tibetan Buddhism , J ohn was installed as
a lama in th e lineage ofDzogchen master Nyoshul Kh en R.inpoche
and his Western Dharma heir, Lama Surya D as. Jo hn teaches regu-
la.rly at meditati on retreats sponso red by th e Dzogchen Cem er,
guidi ng participa nt'> in the discovery of inn ate wisdo m and love. H e
is also seni o r fac ulty adviso r fo r Chokyi N yima Rinpoc hc's Ce nter
for Buddhist Studi es in Kathm andu University, Nepa l. H e is th e
auth or of Bllddhahood Embodied: Sou refS of COlltroversy ill II/dia al/d
Tibet, coedito r w ith R oger Jackso n of Buddhist Tll eology: Critical
Riflectiol/s by COl/temporary Buddhist Scholars, and co-chair o f the

Buddhist Co nstru cti ve R eflection Group in the American Acad-
em y of R eli gio n . J oh n lives with hi s wife, two sons, and dog in

Massacl1 11setts.
Audio Recordings of Guided Meditations
CD :ludi o recordin gs of Lama John Makrallsky leading th e guided

meditations presented in this book are available through:
Dzogchen Center Bookstore

www.dzogchcn.org
or
Wi sdom Publications
w\Vw. wisdomp ubs.org
About Dzogchen Center
Dzogchen Center was founded in 1991 by L1111a Surya Das to fur-

ther the transn'lission of Buddhist contemplative practices and ethi-
cal va lu es to We stern audiences and the transformation of these
tcachin gs into forms that help alleviate suffering and crea te a civiliza-
tion b:J.sed on wisdom and co m passion.

T he Dzogchen Center website (www.dzogchen.org) is a rCb'1.i1arly
updated reso urce for Dzogchen Center informatio n, tea ching and
retreat schedul es, local meditation groups, and online registration.
Dzogche n Center
P. O. Box 340459
Austin , Texas 78734
Email: info@ dzogchen.org
About Wisdom
a nonprofit publisher. is dedicated

W
I S DOM P U BLICATIONS,
to maki ng avai labl e authentic works relating to Buddhism

for th e be nefi t of all . We publish books by ancient and modern masters in
all trad it ions o f Buddhism , translations of important texts, and original
schola rship. Additi onally, we offer books that explore East-West themes
unfolding as traditional Buddhism cncoumers ollr modern culture in all it~
aspects. Our titl es are published with the appreciation ofBuddhisl1l :'IS a liv-
in g philosophy , and with the special commitm ent to preserve and trans-
mit impo rtant w o rks from Buddhism's many traditions.
To lea rn more about W isdom , or to browse books onl ine , visit our
website at www,w isdompubs,org.
YOll may request a copy of our catalog o nline o r b y writing to this
address:
Wisdom Publi cations
199 Elm Street
Somerville, M assachusetts 02 144 USA
T elephon e: 6 17-776-741 6
Fax: 6 17-776-784 1
Ema il: info@ wisdo mpubs.org
\V\Vw. wisdol11pubs.org
Th e Wisdom Trust
As a nonprofit p ublisher, Wisdom is dedicated to t he publicati on o f
Dhan1l3 books fo r th e beneflt of all sentient beings and dependent upon

the kindness and ge nerosity of spo nsors in order to do so. If you wo uld like
to make a donation to Wisdom, you may do so through o ur website or our
Somerville office. If YO ll would like to help sponsor eh e publi ca tion of a

book, please write or email us at ehe address above.
Than k you.
Wisdom is a nonprofit. c;hanlab lt." SOt{C)(3) organization affiliated with the FOllndation for
the P reservation of the Mahayana T ra ditio n (FI'MT).

John Makransky, Lama Surya Das, Philip Osgood - Awakening Through Love - Unveiling Your Deepest Goodness-Wisdom Publications (2007)

Uploaded by

Document Information

Original Description:

Original Title

Copyright

Available Formats

Share this document

Share or Embed Document

Sharing Options

Did you find this document useful?

Is this content inappropriate?

Copyright:

Available Formats

John Makransky, Lama Surya Das, Philip Osgood - Awakening Through Love - Unveiling Your Deepest Goodness-Wisdom Publications (2007)

Uploaded by

Copyright:

Available Formats

Makransky, John (Author). Awakening Through Love : Unveiling Your Deepest Goodness.

Boston, MA, USA: Wisdom Publications, 2007. p (1).

" AllIakcllitlg ~nlro llgh L lVC presents a message of co mpas-

Buddhist teachin g to a co ntemporalY audi ence. This book

love, co mpassion , and Wisdom that we all possess as o ur

Medicille alld Compassioll

Edited by Philip Osgood

Unveiling Your Deepest Goodness

o 2007 John Makransky

Library of COII.i!rm CIIIII/ogillg-ill-PllbIiCiltioll Dlltll

Printed in the U nited States of America

oft This book produced with enviromm:ntal mindfulness. We have elected to

Foreword by Lama Surya Das VII

Introducti on: Unleashing the Powe r of Love

I. R eceiving Love: Key to Life, Key [0 th e Spiritual Path 15

6. Compassion as a Liberating Power [57

O H N MAKRANSKY IS A MENSCH. You 're in good hands wi th

East and West.

immersed in th e study and practi ce of Tibeta n Gelug teachin gs of

of spiritual practice, we all saw the practices oflove and co mpassion

path of awake ni ng through love. Here he offers us the words of his

ened through this path. He speaks about th e power of unconditional

Many readers w ho are not Buddhist wiU find th ese no nsectarian

Lama Surya Das

AM GRATEFUL TO MY SPIRI TUAL TEA C HERS and mentors for

:lI1d tireless co mmitment to th e spirit of enlightenment th:J. t the book

David, alld to rhe cOlI/passiollate spirifllai (.0"1I/1l1111ry of J)zogcliCII Cemer.

VERYTHI NG THAT I S MOST I M PORTANT to human bein gs is

blessed; a place w here we feel free co ex plore o ur li ves together,

of safety. This may sound simple, bue it is not simplistic. It is an

practices available to anyone wi th a stron g interest; it is just a matter

Buddhist Methods to Unleash Love's Power

th e self- transce nd ing wisdom th at informs rh em . The esse nti als of

Unconditional love and co mpass io n, supported by sympathetic

In Tibetan Buddhi sm, one cultivates th e four boundless attitudes

The spirit of e nlightenment is the power of love, compassio n, and

bodhisattva, w ise love and compassion become so endu ring a

Love Is rhe M orive Force for Genuine H elp

hear abou t in th e daily news and so decry- is it only caused by those

the world safer if we ourselves are not a stable port of safety? Ca n we

esse nti al to accomplish everyth ing we most va lu e for o urselves and

because conte mpo rary, sec ular societies ha ve little knowledge of

reso urces into th e tuberculosis program , and many health workers

sio n to make th e program work.

solutions to individual and communal suffcring required more than

Love Empowers Social Service

beco mc burnt out. Th ey ask w hat can be don e to help th cm go on.

a fra il ego? If o tlr motivation for servin g others is tied to a stron g

we may become easily frustra ted and di sheartened.

no burnout, no discourage ment- love in aeeion is sufficient. If one

Without Enduring Love, Relationships Don't Work

The crucial importance of enduring lov e is obvious for family life.

protection for coworkers, clienes, and custom ers, rath er th an an

from our own wors t tendencies to reduce others to mere objects of

No Real Solution to Violence Without

world? According to th e Buddhist teachin gs we wi ll ex plore in this

to o ur own th o ught of th em. Strong love and w isdom are w hat

In my own city ofBostOl1 th ere was a news srory in volvin g ajeal-

poor inner-city neighborhoods. Several ofilis students, deeply upse t

dri ve a never-e ndin g cycle of self-righteous reve nge in the name of

to the actllal reali ti es of persons beyond such projection s. T hese atti-

The Aims and Audience of This Book