A Soldier's Life For A Mother And Her Daughter

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Heard on Morning Edition
February 24, 2011 - STEVE INSKEEP, host:
If you want to hear how much the United States Army has changed in recent years, sit
down with two generations of women in the military.
Ms. KELLY MACDONALD (Student, West Point): I'm Kelly MacDonald. I'm a senior at
West Point.
Ms. BETSY THOMPSON: I'm Betsy Thompson. I am Kelly MacDonald's mother.
INSKEEP: Kelly's mom joined the Army almost three decades ago. Kelly followed her
mom's example. Today, in a time of big deployments in Iraq and Afghanistan, the Army
expects a lot more from Kelly than it ever did from her mom.
NPR's Rachel Martin has the latest in our series.
RACHEL MARTIN: Kelly and her mom Betsy are alike in a lot of ways: They're both avid
runners. They've both got the Irish complexion of Betsy's parents. They both like hiking.
Ms. THOMPSON: This picture is taken during her spring break her first year at West
Point. So this was in 2008, and we were hiking at Pole Steeple, which...
MARTIN: And they both decided to become soldiers, but Kelly MacDonald is going into
an Army much different than the one her mother joined back in 1983. There are more
opportunities, but there's also more risk. Betsy Thompson spent more than a decade in
the Army as a dietician. Her daughter Kelly MacDonald is now about to graduate from
the Army's prestigious military academy.
I went up to West Point to talk with Kelly about what she expects from her military
career. Her mom joined the conversation from her home in Carlisle, Pennsylvania.
And, Betsy, are you hearing us?
Ms. THOMPSON: Yes. I think we're OK right now.
MARTIN: In 1983, Betsy Thompson was a senior in college, deciding what to do with
her life. Going into the military was not part of her plan. She wanted to go into health
care, but the job market at the time was grim, so she applied for an internship at Walter
Reed Medical Center in Washington, D.C.
Ms. THOMPSON: And it had to be the happiest day of my life when I got that
acceptance letter in April of 1983. It meant that I would be commissioned as an officer
into the Army Medical Specialist Corps.
MARTIN: For her, it was a stable job at an uncertain time, and they were even going to
pay her to stay in shape. But going to war wasn't something she thought a lot about.
Ms. THOMPSON: You always knew that in the back of your mind you're making this
commitment for so many years, they can send you anywhere. And they will if they need
to. In that respect, though, it was very different than it is today, because young people
going into the service, they know what they're getting into.
MARTIN: She ended up staying in the military for 11 years. In that time, she got
married, had a baby and got divorced.
Ms. THOMPSON: When I got out of the Army, she was just starting kindergarten, so I
don't think she remembers too much of me being on active duty.
MARTIN: Do you, Kelly? What do you remember about that?
Ms. MACDONALD: I do remember a little bit of her wearing the boots and the uniform,
living on post and kind of living in that community.
MARTIN: And Kelly's your only child. Did it ever occur to you that she would join the
Army?
Ms. THOMPSON: No, not at all. Absolutely not. It's not a subject that really came up
often as she was growing up.
MARTIN: But somehow, Kelly says, Army life became part of her.
Ms. MACDONALD: Like, she was the parent I grew up with. And I didn't realize until a
little bit later, maybe in high school, how kind of unique that was to have this working
single parent kind of raising me while she was in the Army. I kind of didn't appreciate
until later how independent and strong she'd been, and I really kind of admired that and
wanted to kind of follow a similar path.
MARTIN: But Kelly understands that her path will be much different than her mom's.
First off: education. Betsy Thompson went to the University of Maryland, and then
enlisted in the Army and trained at a military hospital in the U.S. Her daughter Kelly is
getting trained to be part of the Army's elite.
(Soundbite of crowd chatter)
MARTIN: It's afternoon at West Point, and cadets are between classes moving from one
building to the next - doing so quickly because it's cold here. And most of the cadets are
young men.
(Soundbite of crowd chatter)
MARTIN: West Point graduated its first co-ed class in 1980. There were 853 men, 62
women. The number of female graduates has more than doubled since then, attracting
a wide variety of students - some who are natural soldiers, others who aren't.
Ms. MACDONALD: West Point has three pillars, they call it: academic, military and
physical. And my strong point is the academic one.
MARTIN: The other parts of a West Point experience have been hard for Kelly.
Ms. MACDONALD: I've had to learn how to be thrown into a pool full of, like, the combat
gear and the uniform and the boots and swim with it on and take it off, and that kind of
thing. We had to take a few combative classes, like fighting kind of techniques.
MARTIN: When she had to pass the required obstacle course test, she hit a wall -
literally.
Ms. MACDONALD: It starts out crawling under some bars that are supposed to simulate
barbed wire. You go over a vault. You have to jump through a tire, climb over a wall,
climb a rope. I actually failed it the first time I took it. I'd never failed at anything before in
my life.
MARTIN: West Point is an academically rigorous school, but at its core, it's a place
where soldiers learn to soldier, so they can lead troops in combat. There is a debate
going on right now about whether women should be allowed into direct ground combat
units. And one of the arguments against this is the idea that women just aren't physically
and emotionally built to handle these kinds of situations.
Kelly's mom Betsy has had her own concerns about whether Army life was right for her
daughter.
Ms. THOMPSON: I look at my daughter as more of a pacifist, and she's very reserved
and quiet, and you just don't imagine a West Point cadet having that type of personality.
MARTIN: OK. Are you a pacifist?
(Soundbite of laughter)
Ms. MACDONALD: I would say that I'm very much not an aggressive person, but I do
think that war is necessary at some times. So I wouldn't say I'm a true pacifist.
MARTIN: And she understands that, unlike her mom, she is likely to see war up close.
Kelly wants to be an Army doctor, and she's going to med school in the fall. After all her
training is done, she'll owe the Army nine years of service.
Ms. MACDONALD: I've shadowed some Army doctors and talked to them, people that
have worked at the larger combat support hospitals in Iraq, or even the smaller centers.
And they all say it's really rewarding, but of course really challenging, too.
MARTIN: In counterinsurgency wars like Iraq and Afghanistan, it's the medics, the
doctors who often find themselves caught up in the fight - ambushes, firefights, rocket
attacks. When I asked Betsy what she thinks about her only child doing that kind of
work in those kinds of situations, she tells me she gets that question a lot, and she gives
me the classic response.
Ms. THOMPSON: People ask me: Well, aren't you proud? And my response is, you
know, I don't think of it like that. I just want her to be happy. And, you know, you raise
them to be the best they can be, and that's what I want her to keep doing.
MARTIN: Betsy Thompson expects her daughter to go further than she did in the Army.
Of course, for women in today's military, going further means going to the fight.
Ms. MACDONALD: Bye, mom.
Ms. THOMPSON: Bye, Kel. Don't forget to call me this weekend.
MARTIN: Rachel Martin, NPR News.
INSKEEP: Tomorrow, Rachel has the story of another West Point graduate. She's a
one-star general in the United States Army, but she may never be able to earn a
second, third or fourth star because of Pentagon rules barring women from serving in
ground combat units.
You can explore other stories in this series at NPR.org.
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Kelly MacDonald and her mom, Betsy Thompson, are alike in a lot of ways. They're
both avid runners. They both have the Irish complexion of Betsy's parents. They both
like hiking. And they both decided to become soldiers.
But MacDonald, who is about to graduate from West Point, is going into an Army much
different from the one her mother joined in the early 1980s. There are more
opportunities, but there's also more risk.
Betsy's Story
In 1983, Thompson was a senior in college, deciding what to do with her life. Going into
the military was not part of her plan. She wanted to go into health care, but the job
market at the time was grim, so she applied for an internship at Walter Reed Army
Medical Center in Washington, D.C.
"It had to be the happiest day of my life when I got that acceptance letter in April of
1983. It meant that I would be commissioned as an officer into the Army Medical
Specialist Corps," Thompson says.
For her, it was a stable job at an uncertain time. They were even going to pay her to
stay in shape. But going to war wasn't something she thought a lot about.
"You always knew that in the back of your mind, you're making this commitment for so
many years, and they can send you anywhere, and they will if they need to. But it was
very different than it is today, because young people going into the service know what
they're getting into," she says.

David Gilkey/NPR
Thompson joined the Army in 1983 and stayed for 11 years. (picture)

Thompson ended up staying in the military for 11 years. In that time she got married,
had a baby and got divorced. "When I got out of the Army, she [Kelly] was just starting
kindergarten and I don't think she remembers too much of me being on active duty."
"I do remember a little bit of her wearing the boots and the uniform, living on post and
kind of living in that community," MacDonald says.
Thompson says she never expected her daughter to join the Army. "No. Absolutely not.
It's not a subject that came up," she says.
But somehow, MacDonald says, Army life became part of her. "She was the parent I
grew up with," MacDonald says. "And I didn't realize until later on in high school how
kind of unique that was to have this working single parent raising me while she was in
the Army. I kind of didn't appreciate until later how independent and strong she'd been,
and I really kind of admired that and wanted to follow a similar path."
But Kelly understands that her path will be much different from her mom's, starting with
her education. Thompson went to the University of Maryland and then went into the
Army and trained at a military hospital in the U.S. Her daughter is getting trained to be
part of the Army's elite.

On The Front Lines: Women In War

Timeline: Women On The Front Lines
Kelly's Story
West Point graduated its first coed class in 1980. There were 853 men and 62 women.
The number of female graduates has more than doubled since then, attracting a wide
variety of students. Some of them are natural soldiers; some of them aren't.
MacDonald says academics are her strong suit. The other parts of a West Point
education — military training and physical training — have been more difficult for her.
And when she had to pass the required obstacle course test, she hit a wall, literally.
"I actually failed it the first time I took it," MacDonald says. "I'd never failed at anything
before in my life."
West Point is an academically rigorous school, but at its core this is a place where
soldiers learn to soldier so they can lead troops in combat. And there is a debate going
on right now about whether women should be allowed into direct ground combat units.
One of the arguments for keeping women out of these units is the idea that women just
aren't physically and emotionally built to handle these kinds of situations.

Courtesy of Betsy Thompson

Cadet Kelly MacDonald will soon graduate from West Point. She wants to be an
Army doctor. (picture)
MacDonald's mom has had her own concerns about whether Army life is right for her
daughter. "I look at my daughter as more of a pacifist, and she's very reserved and
quiet, and you just don't imagine a West Point cadet having that type of personality,"
Thompson says.
MacDonald dismisses the characterization. It's true she's not an aggressive person,
MacDonald says, but she does think war is necessary at some times.
And she understands that, unlike her mom, she's likely to see war up close.
MacDonald wants to be an Army doctor, and she's going to medical school at Brown
University in the fall. After all her training, she'll owe the Army nine years of service.
In counterinsurgency wars like Iraq and Afghanistan, medical personnel can find
themselves caught up in the fight — ambushes, firefights, rocket attacks. MacDonald
says she's prepared for that. What does Thompson think about her only child potentially
facing those kinds of situations?
"I just want her to be happy," she says. "You raise them to be the best they can be, and
that's what I want her to keep doing."
Thompson expects her daughter to go further than she did in the Army. Of course, for
women in today's military, going further means going to the fight.