AGENDA FOR FAMILY MEETING

1. Do Mom and Dad have a will and are the executors aware of its’ whereabouts?
When was the last time it was reviewed?

2. Have the powers of attorney in place been accepted by all who will be involved in the
transfer of assets – including the bank?

3. Who is in control of the assets? Are there outside parties involved with liens on assets,
ex-spouses or business partners?
 8. If either parent re-marries post the demise of Mom/Dad, what financial power vests
with the new spouse and if Mom/Dad predecease the new spouse, what rights do
they have over occupation of the family home and enjoyment of benefits such as
retirement annuity income?

9. What structure exists to ensure harmony and unity in the family are protected during
the transfer or disposal of shares/ownership of the family business interests? If one
adult child has the skill to run the family business and others wish to remove themselves
from being financially dependent on or benefit from the family business, what
arrangements have been documented?

10. What protections have been put in place to prevent the estate of either parent from
coming under attack from predators (like an ex-spouse or hostile business partner),
creditors, unplanned demise of both parents simultaneously or inequitable distribution
challenges?

11. What about disposal of family heirlooms and generational gifts/special assets? Who
gets Mom’s jewelry and Dad’s power tools to avoid the auctioneer and lawyers getting
wealthy from their forced disposal?

12. If the parents run out of money before they run out of months, who assumes financial
control of their medical and long term-care expenses? If frail care costs exceed their
ability to self-fund the years it endures for, which assets get sold first to fund the
process and are all kids in agreement on this issue?
o RESPONSIBLE DRIVING BEHAVIOR
Example: Each child who has no impaired driving conviction (or maximum demerit points
total) for a consecutive, unbroken period of 10 years from age 18 to age 28 will receive a
refund on their previous year’s car insurance premiums on January 2nd each year. The
maximum amount payable each year is R 30 000. Amounts in excess of the actual premium
costs shall accrue and be distributed to the beneficiary at the conclusion of the 10 year
period.

o SELF RELIANCE
Example: Any child starting their own business shall receive a payment from the trust
matching any bank loan they may qualify for on a rand-for-rand basis.

o MENTORING AND COACHING

Example: Any child entering the world of self-employment shall be entitled to an annual
sponsorship of professional association membership dues, one annual industry association
national convention (attendance package with travel expenses) as well as the expenses of
an accredited experienced mentor/coach for a period of 2 years following them starting
their own business or entering a commission-based career. Maximum benefit value of
R 200 000.

o HOME OWNERSHIP
Example: Any child purchasing their own home before age 25 will receive a payment
matching their own deposit/down payment to a maximum of R 250 000. Additionally, a
further amount of R 250 000 shall be made available to any such child who has paid off
2/3 of their first bond within 10 years of taking out this bond.

o FAMILY STABILITY
Example: Trust pays engaged children/grandchildren with a contribution of R 100 000
towards their wedding/honeymoon/first marital home upon successful attendance at 10
pre-marital counseling sessions with accredited/recognized marriage counselor in their
home province.
4. Where are all the passwords, titles, deeds, tax records, legal documents, proof of
ownership and financial records located? Who has access to them in the event either
family member cannot speak for themselves? (Request your Estate Directory from the
advisor who shared this document with you today – and introduce him/her to others
you care about whose financial record-keeping may need to be improved upon)

5. Has advice been received and reviewed in the last year to minimize tax impact on the
estate and are the necessary structures in place to ensure efficient transfer of assets
with minimum delays and legal fees? For example, a single missing initial on a single
page in a will entails re-drawing or amending the document at thousands of rands per
hour (legal fees), courier charges to get witnesses to re-sign, notary fees, etc.

6. What instructions are in place with regards to End-Of-Life decisions and actions?
Understanding that parents may have specific religious or personal beliefs about
sustaining/not sustaining life under certain circumstances, has a living will been
created and shared with all family members? What about organ donation
considerations and burial wishes?

7. At what point do adult children involve themselves in assuming control of parent’s

decision making and what are the mental incapacity milestones that trigger this
transfer of decision-making – and into whose hands does the control pass (oldest
son/daughter? A joint committee of the kids?) Specifically, when do we take over
Mom’s bank account and when does Dad surrender his car keys?
13. Do all adult children know what the parent’s net worth is and is there consensus on
the structure of any decided transfer to them? Specifically, do the kids all really want
to inherit the family beach house across the country – or would they rather have Mom
and Dad sell it when they turn 70, take half the money and enjoy a grand overseas trip
every year and gift the other half of the money to their middle-aged kids in the form of
a decade’s worth of premiums forward-paid on large life insurance policies and premium
medical aid/dread disease/disability cover?

14. Has consideration been given by the parents to establishing a Values Trust to enshrine
their positive living morals and values in their estate plan and final wishes? A Values
Trust allows parents and grandparents to reward kids/grandkids for the life that they
build instead of just rewarding them with uncontrolled cash as beneficiaries of an estate.
Essentially, suitably qualified advisors work with accountants/ attorneys to create a trust
that encourages and rewards certain life goals over time, such as:

o FURTHER EDUCATION BEYOND HIGH SCHOOL

Example: Any of my children who graduate from an accredited university or college with
the equivalent of a B average or better within 4 years of registering at that university/
college, may receive payment of R 100 000 for use as the down payment on a home.

o CONTINUOUS STABLE EMPLOYMENT

Example: Any of my children who submit 5 years consecutive tax returns showing a
minimum of R 500 000 annual income, may receive a once-off payment of R 250 000 at
the end of the 5 year period.

o SOCIAL CONTRIBUTION IN SOCIETY’S NON-PROFIT SECTOR

Example: Any of my children who elect to enter the non-profit sector of society in order
to pursue their passion in helping the disadvantaged sector/s may be paid R 100 000 a
year in order to “top up” probable salary sacrifice for a maximum of 3 years prior to their
35th birthday.

o CONSERVATIVE FINANCIAL DISCIPLINE

Example: Any of my children who save more than R 100 000 by their 21st birthday will
receive a payment from the trust of a matching R 100 000 in order to commend their
frugal spending behavior.
BOOK YOUR FAMILY MEETING AND ARRANGE FOR MY PROFESSIONAL
FACILITATION OF THESE CRITICAL CONVERSATIONS WITH FAMILY
MEMBERS AND YOUR ACCOUNTING/LEGAL ADVISORS

Guidelines for an effective Family Meeting:

1. The sooner you hold this gathering the better. If any one family member is
unavailable in the short term due to geographic distance/travel challenges,
they can join us virtually by web camera.

2. Preferably a full day should be allotted to the process and the venue should
be the family home or holiday home if you wish to co-ordinate around the next
natural family gathering (Religious Holidays, Dec holidays, long weekend)

3. As your facilitator, allow me to cater the lunch as a token of my appreciation for

your entrusting me as your guide in these vital discussions. Please advise any
dietary restrictions beforehand.

4. If the family accountant/attorney are closely involved with your business and
personal affairs on a solid relationship foundation, they should certainly be
encouraged to attend the final hour of the proceedings where we will brief them
on decisions that have been taken in unison by all attendees in order for them to
get insights into and clarity on the structural choices and commitments that have
been made by the family unit.

5. If you need advice and counsel on how to encourage attendance and participation
by any family member who may show reluctance to make themselves available – or
may even be in denial about wanting to confront these important financial and
emotional matters in a positive spirit, kindly inform me and I can guide you
accordingly.

6. Discuss with me the financial options available for my professional involvement in

this meeting and subsequent follow-up discussions which may be required. I can
either quote you on my fee structure for objective stewardship of the entire process;
or waive these fees on the understanding that any financial solutions which may be
procured as a result of the discussions will be provided by my firm; or an upfront
deposit on fees held in trust and offset against the eventual procurement of solutions
as required.

Name of Advisor:

Phone number:

Email:

Anthony Morris ©