Integration: Cultural History (Week 12) 4/2/21

I am half Asian and half Russian, but I look more Asian than Russian. I was born in

Kazakhstan and then adopted into a white family. Because of this I have always had a hard time

with figuring out who I am and relating to a group. It took me years to realize that I was different

from all the other white kids at my school and in my neighborhood, and since then I really never

felt like I belonged. I wasn’t Asian enough for the Asian kids, but I wasn’t white enough for the

white kids. One of the earliest memories I have was when I was hanging out with some other

Asian kids and I was being introduced to some new Asian culture that I had never experienced

before. I was never raised with any Asian culture or traditions so being introduced to a new

culture was fascinating for me. The person who has had the most influence on my attitudes and

opinions is my mother. She has always taught me to love everyone no matter what they look like

or how they act. She always told me that everyone is special, but there are some people who

don’t believe the same thing. She taught me this to prepare me for the racism that I would

receive in my life. This really shaped me to love everyone and not have any prejudice towards

anyone.  I used to be ashamed that I was Asian because of all the racism and bullying I got

growing up from teachers, classmates, and random strangers. I started to feel bad about myself

and who I was, but then I realized that I should be proud of who I am. I may not know anything

about my culture, but I know that I should be proud of who I am. I used to feel very negative, but

now I only feel things that are positive about me and my background.