Succeed in cambridge positions marked Andrew BetsisWN SUPPLEMENT | Semple Writing sets (1 pass example, and 1 fail example) written by real CAE candidates and marked by experienced Cambridge examiners, followed by a detailed justification by the examiners of the marks awarded, = Organisation and cohesion Clearly organised into paragraphs with appropriate linking devices. = Appropriacy of register and format hich areaiit is best for your cousin to stay. ‘= Baris easy for somebody to get a job in that area. (> Hthe area is beat and if c could inspare somebody to a painting oF crowing, is eany for your cousin to meet people of his her age. Eck Hi Andy, Ir mas great to receive your letter, and what exciting news! ‘You're going to spend the summer in Europe working on your painting! Good for you for trying it! I think it's fantastic idea, hnowever I have mixed feelings about whether or not I would recommend that you choose Florence. (On one hand, I think for sure it would inspire your painting, [) Florence is truly an exceptional historic city, both in general cand in terms of art, And of course there are enough museums ‘to keep you busy at least for a month, and many iconic works ‘of art te pay homage to. Not to mention beautiful old buildings ‘end the scenic river going through the city. On the other hand, it's ridiculously expensive there, All the ‘shops and restaurants seem intend on squeezing as much cash ‘os possible from the tourists. But T know you speck fluent Tralian, so you maybe be able to get « job and be fine. I would say the job would be a necessity. Well, if you decide to go, don't stay at the old city centre. It's +50 expensive and packed with tourists. You should look for ¢ place on the other side of the river where is less crowded and far more authentic. And don't worry. Youll have ne trauble meeting young people. There are friendly travellers and stu- dents from all over the world. Just join in a sports centre like T did, and youll be good Write soon and tell me your decision! Your cousin, Anna Consistently informal to unmarked, = Range Language of description, evaluation and recommendation, w Target reader Would be informed. Seinen Content: Good realisation of the task. Organisation and cohesion: Well organized, with evidence of use of a range of cohesive devices. Range A good range of vocabulary and structure. Accuracy ‘An ambitious attempt at the task with a number of errors ia the writing (“seem intend on squeezing” “so you maybe be able to") however they do not impede the reader's understanding, Appropriaey of register and format Appropriate to the task; consistently informal. Target reader Would be informed. Marks awarded «i Band3 ossm= ASSESSMENT ‘Candidates’ answers are assessed with reference to two mark schemes: one based on the examiner's overall impression (the ‘General Impression Mark Scheme), the other on the requirements of the particular task {the Task Spacific Mark Scheme). ‘The General Impression Mar Scheme summarises the content, organisation and cohesion, range of structures ané vocabulary, register and format, and targer reader indieated in the task. The Task Specific Mark Scheme focuses on criteria specific to each pardcular task, = BAND 3 mu BAND 2 Candidates who fully satisfy the Band 3 descriptor will For a Band 2 to be awarded, the candidate's writing has a demonstrate an adequate performance in writing at _ negative effect on the target reader. The content is not always CAE level. relevant, information and ideas are inadequately organised For a Band 3 to be awarded, the candidate's writing hasa___and sometimes incoherent, with inaccurate use of cohesive satisfactory effect on the target reader, The content isrele- devices. The range of structures and vocabulary is limited vant wlth some development of the topic. Candidates who do and/or repetitive, and errors may be basic or cause difficulty not address all the content points will be penalised for dealing for the reader from a comprehension perspective. Register inadequately with the requirements ofthe task. Inforrmation and format are sometimes inappropriate for the purpose of and ideas are generally organised logically, though cohesive _the task and the target audience. devices may not always be used appropriately. A satisfactory range of structures and vocabulary is used, though word choice may ack precision. Errors which do oceur do not ‘cause dificuty for the reader. Register and format are reasonably appropriate for the purpose of the task and the target audience, “A Lattor is wrtan i response toa sation de- scribed inthe exam question. is very portant that candidates are aware of who the target reader. n order o use appropriate language in thelr answers ‘They are expected to write letters for diferent occa sind aig: tothe edtor of newspaper orto the ere tor ofa company ete “There are many Letter types suchas: a} leer of spplction,b tor of reference fora frend (in eer format ora tater) eters of complain 6) nformal eters toa friend Lerer wring conventions, lar paragraphing, good orgntavon, opening ssutions and cosng shes sre important, Saeko Dear andy, Thanks for your letter. it was good to receive. Yes, you should definitely go and stay there for the summer. it would be @ really good idea. First of all, there will be plenty to interest you. There are so many museums and galleries that you can occupy your- self with visiting. The city is beautiful and has many old buildings. You can take walks along the river bank too. You can also join the sports centre like | did and meet lots of new friends, The city is very expensive, much more so than Iwas expecting ‘Contents Content not fully developed. ‘Some borrowing from the prompt. Organisation and cohesion Poorly organized. Although paragraphs are present, they do not always contain a single idea, Range A rather restricted range of vocabulary and structure. Accuracy GGencrally accurate with a few non-impeding errors in the writing (“help the costs” “I made friends with the sports centre”). Appropriaey of register and format Appropriate to an informal letter. ‘Target reader Would be partially informed. Marks awarded Band 2 ‘You must stay in the suburbs where it's cheaper. 1 wanted to get a part time job to help with the costs but | couldn't speak the language enough. You speak the language, don't you? | think you could probably get a job there. That would hrela the costs. i'm sure you will not be lonely if you go there. ! was there only for week and | made friends with the sports centre, and in the museums and galleries. You will be there longer and you will have time to make even more friends. Besides, ‘you will be too busy to be lonely hope you will take the chance, I'm sure you will not regret it Love, your cousin jillI TEST 1 - PART 2 QUESTION 2 - COMPETITION ENTRY ‘a Content For Band 3 or above, the candidate's COMPETITION ENTRY rust = Nominaze somebody to be honoured in the series += Describe the person's character and achievements. + Justify higher choice of them as a hero-ike figure. '= Organisation and cohesion Clearly organised into paragraphs with appropriate linking devices. = Appropriacy of register and format ‘May mix registers f appropriate to approach taken by candidate, = Range Language of description, explanation and justification Vocabulary related to describing people. = Targot reader Would be informed, What is a hero? Someone who saves the world, who wins a war, who saves children from dying from terri- ble disease? In the last hundred years, most of our lives are not touched with war, people have good health care mostly and life is not too hard. I think in the last hundred years there are a different kind of hero. If T choose a hero in the last hundred T would sey it is Elvis Presley. Elvis made a very big change in the world, I do not know his character but I think he wanted to get peo- ple's attention and challenge them. He must have been not afraid of controversy. He must have these characteristics te do what he did because he changed the view of music forever. He made it some- thing for young people, and he made possible for it to be different from music before. He was the father of rock and roll and made possible all the different kinds of music that are popular with young people ‘today such as hip hop and pop and metal. Tsay he is a hero because all these Kinds of music make people very happy. By going on a stage and shocking people he made it possible for kids today to enjoy music and also to express themselves in dif fer- ent ways by music. In conclusion, I think that Elvis's contribution to ‘today’s music is very important. Each time I hear pop song that makes me happy when I'm sad, or have fun with my friends at a concert, I owe a thanks to Elvis, The world would not be the same without him. [ezikeaucaes ‘Content: All points covered. Organisation and cohesion Clearly organised into paragraphs, Range Vocabulary and structure is adequate for the task, ‘Accuracy Mostly accurate with a few awkward expressions (“there are a different kind of hero” “Lowe a thanks"), Appropriaey of register and format Appropriate to the task. Target reader Achieves the desired effect. Marks awarded Band 3‘A Competition Entry is usually writen for a panel of judges and candidates have to nominate somebody for something or propose themselves {or selection for something. ‘Candidates have to use language of persuasion ‘and give reasons for their choices. Sara | would like to suggest @ hero for your competition. | would like to nominate Neil Armstrong, the astronaut, and the first man who stepped on the moon. Content: All points addressed but not expanded (not many details about the ‘person's character, just comments about astronauts in general) Already to he an astronaut is @ very big thing that isn’t Organisation and cohesion easy to achieve. They are tested about very many things and they must train very hard for many years. Not very well organized. Paragraphs present First of all to do this someone's character must be con- but very uneven in size. fident and determined. He must also not mind working Range hard. There are many times in the school where they An adequate range of vocabulary but rather choose only the best to proceed, and each time he had limited structures. to be chosen. Then the excursion to the moon! He must Accuracy have been scared. Nobody knew what would happen. Quite a bit of awkwardness in the language: There was a very big risk. But he went in the space suit, (“Already to be” “in the school” “dreamed ~ and he went outside of the space ship and he stepped tobe") _ : ‘on the moon. He put a flag there too for America, Appropriacy of register and format Appropriate to the task | think Neil Armstrong is a person like a hero because he Target reader ‘took the imagination of so many people. All the children Negative effect on the reader. after him dreamed ta be astronauts. Also, he did some- Marks awarded thing so brave and so dangerous, and all the people Band 2 were watching him also cheering for him to do it, and hhe was successful. He has @ place that is his own now in all the history books. 1 hope you will take my advice and ‘choose him to honour in you radio programmes.a. TEST 1 - PART 2 ~ QUESTION 3 - LETTER OF APPLICATION (aera) = Content For Band 3 or above, the candidate's LETTER OF APPLICATION ‘must include the following information: + Age of the applicant. + Whether he/she has knowledge of the area (include a highlight of the area and say what makes it so special) «+ Applicant's character, hisfher interests and whether he/she gers on well with people. + Justify why the applicane is suitable for the job. 1» Organisation and cohesion Clearly organised into paragraphs with appropriace linking deviees. 1 Appropriacy of register and format Formal to unmarked, = Range Language of description, explanation and comparison. w Target reader Would be informed, Dear Sir or Madam, Tam writing in response to the advert I saw in the newspaper seeking for people to work as tour guides. T think T would make a very good tour guide and T wish to apply for the job. ‘There are a number of reasons that T think T would make an ideal employee for you. Iam nineteen years old and have just completed my first year studying archaeology at the univer- sity. Although I did not grow up in this city, I really love it here and have enjoyed getting to knaw the city. Now, I know if like the back of my hand, but T still have the enthusiasm of visitor. For this reason T think I would be very good at showing other visitors around, T have always been a sociable and like meeting and talking with people; for example when T started university I joined five different clubs! That was bit much, so now E choose my three favourite which I'm still cctive with, T believe the highlight of our area is the history. Tt is a very great history and it is known extensively. There are very many archaeological sites, which are well shown, for people to see and visit and understand, Not many cities have such an ‘opportunity to educate visitors so much about the past. T oppreciate your attention to my letter and T hope you will consider my application. If you need any more information please feel free to contact me. I hope to hear from you soon. Yours faithfully, Content: All points covered and expanded, ‘Organisation and cohesion Clearly organised into paragraphs. Range ‘Very good range of vocabulary and structure Accuracy Accurate with a few non-impeding errors, Appropriacy of register and format Consistent register, could benefit from being more formal. Target reader Would be informed, and would consider the applicant. ‘Marks awarded Band 3Dear Sir or Madam, | want to apply for my application. | know my local area very well because 1 grew up here and i the interesting things here. There are a lot of sites to see ‘and good hotels and restaurants to visit. | get on well with people and 1 communicate very well with them. 1am friends with everybody. I do not fight or argue with people and | am polite with then, | ant funny and | like to go to the cinema café to talk with th vice. | also like to read many books and | like sometimes to make paintings. | would like very much to have the opportue nity to be @ tour guide and make friendships with more people. | would make a goad tour guide because | arn friendly with ail the people and | am polite with them. 1 would help them to I would say the highlight of the area is all the good seafood restaurants and the seafront places to walk and sit in cafes and eat. These are a perfect place to take a holiday and to relax. The food is very good and itis unique. The tourists can sit outside by th Thank you very ruc will think about taking me for the job of tour guide. Yours Faithfully, A Letter of Application is always formal in style unless the question explicitly stares other- ‘wise, Its purpose isto propose 2 candidate, and outline his suitability, for a particular position. Description (ofa person's character and strengths), explanation and justfiation are im- portant functions in a Letter of Application. Snes the job of tour guide. 1 hope you will like am interested in learning all about all with my friends and then maybe to iem about things. We give each other ad- Contents Not all points covered. irrelevant information included. Organisation and cohesion Organised into paragraphs, bat cohesion, Range Range of vocabulary and st limited. Vocabulary not 2 effectively accomplish the task. Accuracy bbe comfortable and to have nice times. attempt made at anything but expression, Appropriacy of register and Inconsistent register; sometinses formality, ‘Target reader Would have a negative effect o reader. Marks awarded Band 2 he sea and they can enjoy themselves. ich for reading my letter and | hope youTEST 1 - PART 2 QUESTION 4 - REVIEW Cee ‘= Content 1 Organisation and cohesion For Band 3 or above, the candidate's REVIEW muse Clearly organised into paragraphs with appropriate * Describe the plot and the characters. linking devices. * Say for whom the fllm is suitable. = Appropriacy of register and format + Mention any special effects or other important Formal to unmarked. Must be consistent. characteristics of the fm, = Range + Say why you would recommend that fm to somebody. Language of description, explanation and opinion. Vocabulary related to description of plot, and recommendation of afl. a Target reader Would be Informed. (Sixes Content: All points covered and expanded, Organisation and cohesion Clearly organised into paragraphs. Range Very good range of vocabulary and structure, Accuracy A mumber of non-impeding errors and awkward phrases (“have been fighting with” “marry by * “make..t0”). Appropriacy of register and format Appropriate to the task, ‘Target reader ‘Would be informed and interested. ‘Marks awarded Band 3 Film Review - Romeo and Juliet This new film of Romeo and Juliet is a very successful adap- tation of Shakespeare's famous play and it does a great job of engaging the audience with the story at all times. ‘The story begins with a large fight between the Capulets ‘and the Montagues, two prestigious Families in Verona, Italy. The two protagonists of the story, Romeo and Julie, who come from these two families fall in love, but they later re- alise that their families are enemies. They are devastated, but they decide to marry and finally Romeo and Juliet marry by Friar Lawrence, Juliet's mother wants to make Juliet to marry @ man named Paris but Juliet, refuses to comply. Fr. Lawrence gives her a potion which will make her appecr dead cand he promises to tell Romeo. She drinks the potion and ‘everybody thinks she is dead, Friar Lawrence's letter fails find Romeo, so he assumes that his wife is dead and commits Suicide, Loter, when Juliet wakes to find Romeo dead and kills herself. would wholeheartedly recommend this film to anyone wha like Shakespeare and romantic love stories. It is @ classic story that still appeals to everybody even to younger audi- ences‘A Review is usually written for a magazine or news- paper. Its aim isto describe and express the writer's ‘opinion about a film, a book, ete. Description, explanation and recommendation are important functions in a review. We all have some experience in our lives that we wish we could just forget. Have you ever though about what would happen if the wish could come. true? The movie “The Eternal ‘Sunshine of a Spotless Mind" addresses just this thought. Tris story about a man and a woman whe are in love but ‘Content: Too much space devoted to ‘then split up. They have a very bad time and end up hating describing plot and not enough suagest- each other and hurting so badly. So they decide to go in for a | ing who the film is suitable for and why. ‘treatment to make them better by erasing their memories of Characters not described. each other totally. The movie shows us their memories as the Organisation and cohesion doctors go to find them in order to erase them. We learn Not very well organized. Paragraphs about their relationship and all the things that went wrong, present but very uneven in size We see them in their memories as they are fighting. We also Range see the doctors find and erasing some happy memories, that probably they would like to keep. Then after the process has completed, they go back out into the world. They end up meeting each other again, and guess what? They once agein fallin love, After all, they are the same people and they have ‘An adequate range of vocabulary and structure Accuracy ‘The language is generally accurate ‘There are a few errors (“the doctors find no bad memories to make them frighten. Will they make the and erasing” “process has same mistakes again, or might it work if they try again? completed") however they do not pre- ‘vent the reader from understanding the Tris avery clever movie, and a fun movie and Z would highly writer’s intention. recommend you to watch it if you get a chance. Appropriaey of register and format Appropriate to the task; attempts to be engaging ‘Target reader Would be partially informed Marks awarded Band 2TEST 2 - PART 2 QUESTION 2 - ESSAY = Content 1 Organisation and cohesion folowing 207 abO¥e the candcat's ESSAY mus address tho Clearly rgansed its paveephe with appropriate following issues: linking devices. * Whether itis better for women with children to stay at # Appropriacy of register and format ‘home and look after them rather than having a career Formal to unmarked * Whether men can full this role [in the home] as well as m Range women can, Language of description and opinion. * I there are some jobs that women are more suited to 1 Target reader than men, Would be informed. Sens 35 ¢ women's place in the home? This question always Seems to open a bottomless pit of controversy, It is Particularly a difficult question when children are con- cerned, as they would most defiantly benefit with hay. ing full time attention of one at least parent. But regardless of women's ambitions and children's needs, T {hink itis a bit an old Fashioned question, It is virtually impossible, today, for a woman to stay home. Seokennens Content: All points addressed Organisation and cohesion Well organised, with attention paid to cohesion. Range A good range of vocabulary and structure. Accuraey ‘There are a few non-intrusive errors (Ca few families ean survive by one” “now requiring” “try avoiding to de- bate”), Appropriacy of register and format Appropriate to the task. ‘Target reader Would be informed. Marks awarded Band 3 First of all, « few families can survive by one income. Living expenses are much higher than they used to be Rent and mortgage payments are costly and sometimes even take up one whole salary every month. Also, fami- lies wart more holidays and mere possessions nowadays and very few will sacrifice this in order for the women to stop working, Also, our society is set up now requiring women in the workforce. These days, most teachers are women, and many designers, researchers and healthcare profession. als. Some people might say women are better suited than men to jobs requiring patience, cooperation and communication skills, Regardless of any stereotypes, s0- ety would change if women suddenly began to stay ome. If they did, who would do the jobs? Shank, nowadays, some would see it as a luxury for 4 fe stay at home with her children, and the fa-‘An Essay should be well organised, with an introduction, clear paragraphs and fina conclusion, Candidates are required to justify theie opinions (discuss both sides of an argument) on a certain topic. Essays need to present an opinion and give reasons to support it. Candidates need to practise using diferent ways to express opinions and agree or disagree using formal language. ‘They should agree or disagree with the statement inthe rubric, or discuss both sides. Correct use of appropriate linking words, as well as opening and concluding para- graphs, is essential in essay writing, People are always making stereotypes. A very com- mon stereotype is that women belong in the home, and men should have careers and support the fam- ilies. This is a very harmful thing. We should not generalise that a woman's place is in the home. Every individual person is different, if they are a man or if they are a woman. One woman may be very good business person and not like children at all. Another may dream to be only a mother, Like this, one man might love children very much and want to be at home dad. His wife might have a very good career and want to follow that. What is good for one must not be good for all the others, There are biologic reasons that people say women should take care of the babies, but these days it is not so much important, Women must carry the babies and give birth, but this does not stop them from doing most of the jobs. Most of the jobs today do not need hard physical work. Also, women must to feed the babies, but men can do that and now with bottles. T think, concluding, that everyone is different, and we must not to make stereotypes and say that @ woman belongs only in the home and a man with a career, There are many ways to bea family. Semen Contents All points are addressed. Organisation and cohesion Not a well organised essay ~ first para- graph is to0 long. Range Limited, There is repetition of the vocabulary, Accuracy ‘There are a lot of errors in basic structures ‘ff they are « man or if they ‘must not to make stereotypes") Appropriacy of register and format Appropriate to the task: ‘Target reader Negative effect on the reader. Marks awarded Band 2 (“biologic’TEST 2 - PART 4 QUESTION 3 - REFERENCE = Content '# Organisation and cohesion For Band 3 or above, the candidate's LETTER OF REFERENCE Clearly organised into paragraphs with appreprisie linking devices must: a * include information about his/her friene's character = Appropriacy of register and format ‘and personal qualities that make them suitable for the job Formal to unmarked. + mantion any work and life experiences that are relevant Range to the job Language of description, explanation and recommendation Vocabulary related to personality = Target reader Would be informed, Be Content: Ail points are addressed and expanded. Organisation and cohesion Weil organised with good use of cohesive devices, Dear Sir or Madam, Lam writing to you to give a character reference for my friend Mandy Smith. T know Mandy since 5 years, and she is one of my closest friends, She was also my room- mate during the first two years at university, so I know Range her very well and have seen her reactions for a variety ‘Adequate forthe task of situations. Accuracy There are a few non-impeding errors ("to tell about Mandy” “since 5 years”) Appropriacy of register and format Appropriate to the task ‘Target reader Would be informed. Marks awarded Band 3 ‘The first thing I want to tell about Mandy is that she has more energy then anyone else I have ever met, I think this would make her on ideal candidate for you po- sition of tour guide, because she will have no trouble working long hours with enthusiasm and good humour. Her energy is contagious too, so not only will she be fine with the demands of a large group of people but she will also help to keep them excited, interested, and moving. Actually, we went together on summer holidays one year, with three other girls, and at the end of the day it was only Mandy who was reading the maps and research- ing the travel arrangements for the next day, while the rest of us were falling into our beds in exhaustion. She. took care of the organizetion for all of us. So, although she doesn't have previous work experience, she would be a natural for this job I know it! T hope you will consider Mandy Smith, If I may be of any further assistance, please don't hesitate to contact me. Your faithfully.(Candidates may also be asked to write a Reference for a friend. This can be written following a letter format but may also be written as a statement. Language of description, explanation and recommendation should be used, Phrases or agjectives describing the subject's character are also use Dear Sir or Madam, Tam writing this reference to you in regard of my friend George Jones. He is not only my friend but has worked in the same of fice with me for the last two years. His job in this office is delivering packages to ‘the customers, and in this job he is completely de- pendable. George isa funny person and the others around him care always laughing. Tt is a good quality trait and make him a very good person to be around, T believe that this is an important character trait for a tour guide as the tour guide must be a good person to be round and have fun with, George is also kind and gentle and he cares about the other people feelings. He never fights or insults the others. If he was a tour guide he would toke care of all the people in the big group and want them to feel good. No only because it was his job but too because it is something that feels right to him. Examiner Comments Contents Points are partially addressed, and could be expanded. Organisation and coh Adequate for the task. Range Limited. Only basic structures are used. Accuracy A lot of grammatical mistakes: (No only..” “about other people..”) ‘Very basic structures and simple sentences. Appropriacy of register and format The letter is not closed. Could use more formal register, ‘Target reader Would be informed about his character, but his work or life experience is not explained as an advantage. ‘Marks awarded Band 2TEST 2 - PART 4 QUESTION 4 - PROPOSAL Clearly organised into paragraphs. possibly with headings. 1 Appropriacy of register and format Formal to unmarked. ‘The aim of this proposal is to outline what should be of- fered by our new career service and how it should be run. Opening times First of all, I think it is important to choose hours to open carefully, If it is open when people cannot use it +his is not helpful for anyone. The students who use it will be free to visit at the lunchtime hours and also after classes in the evening. These times it should be open. What it should offer Tr should offer some certain things to help the students inform. Information must be provided on higher educa- tion opportunities. Also it should inform about part time and temporary work opportunities and also about voca- tions and careers. This is important because not all the people want the same thing, Secondly, we should have seminars by people who are fol- lowing different careers so that they can tell students what this is like, This will help students to make their decision. Finally, we should also provide a job notice board where compenies can advertise about their jobs, This will help the students and the companies both to find what they look for, T think if you follow these suggestions it will be a very helpful career service. ‘= Content, For Band 3 or above, the candidate's PROPOSAL must: = Range + Seate what service this new career office could offer. Language of description, recommendation and persuasion. + How it could be run, w Target reader Would be informed. = Organisation and cohesion ‘Content: All points addressed. Organisation and cohesion Well-onganized, making use of headings. Effective use of cohesive devices, Range Adequate for the task, Accuracy ‘There are a few non-impeding errors ("10 help the students inform”) Appropriacy of register and format Appropriate to the task. ‘Target reader Would be informed. Marks awarded Band 3(work colleagues etc.) suggestions using formal language Skene Dear Jackie Sandown, We have received funding to set up a new careers service. My proposal is as to what the service could offer and how it could be run, We will appoint two staff members to the office. They should work both for 15 hours a week, The opening hour should be lunchtime and after college because this is when the students are free to visit the new office. Tt should provide for the students many higher edu- cation information and also part-time and temporary work opportunities as well as vocations and careers. These are all very good opportunities for students and they will be very interested in the information. Tt will also be very good for them to see seminars and talks about people in different careers. They will learn about the different careers and have an inter- esting time learning about that. In addition, it would be advantageous for us to make. job notice boards ‘that companies con be used to advertise on about the jobs they want someone to do. Student can come. and, read this and be helped to find a good job while the companies are helped because they find the students. In conclusion I think you will have « very nice careers service, The students will be helped so much by this follow my proposal and everyone will be very glad. I hope te hear from you very soon. Sincerely, ‘The target reader(s) for a Proposal is (are) usually an em ployer!superier, a college principal or a specific group of people: ‘The aim of the proposal is to present some suggestions and ‘support them with facts, in order to persuade the reader to do something and it should be clearly organised with headings. Candidates are expected to make recommendations and service and they will appreciate it so much. You should eek Content: All points addressed, but little expansion, There is considerable Dorrowing from the prompt. Organisation and cohesion Some cohesive devices used, but first para- graph too long and it contains different ideas. Letter form is not correct for a proposal Range ‘A rather limited range with notable repetition ‘Accuracy ‘There are a number grammatical and syntactical errors (“My proposal is as to” “They should work both for” “companies can be used to advertise”). Appropriacy of register and format Too informal; requires formal register. ‘Target reader Would be informed, however there would be a rather negative effect. ‘Marks awarded Band 2TEST 3 - PART 7 QUESTION 1 - REPORT Lee 1 Content 1 Organisation and cohesion For Band 3 or above, the candidate's REPORT must: ‘Gearty organised ito paragraphs with appropriate + sate both the positive and the negative aspects linking devices. Headings should be included. . ofthe complex 1 Appropriacy of register and format . + state what effect the complex has had on the local Formal to unmarked, negative aspects could be improved + make some suggestions as to how the more. ‘environment and the community = Range Language of description and recommendation 2 Target reader ‘Would be informed. The punpose of this report is to evaluate the effect of the holiday complex on the environment and community. Positive Points Overall, there seem to be many positive points for the community. The complex is weli managed and in good condition. Tt provides valuable employment and training for local people. In addition it looks attractive with good landscaped grounds. Finally, because extra trees, were planted it improved the local environment and air quality. Negative Points (On the other hand, there are some negative effects of the complex. There is alot of litter that is coming from the complex, and the beach is especially damaged. There is noise late at night, which not just bothering the residents, could disturb wild animals such as birds and fish. Other negatives is that the canteen is a mess when it is full and the grounds of the complex are very dark and could be dangerous Recommendations There are some changes that would benefit all. There. should be noise limits after 10pm, and perhaps the. complex should hire someone to clean the beach each morning, The grounds should be lit at night, to improve safety, and the canteen should be redesigned and expanded Conclusion Overall, this complex has been a positive addition to ‘the community, in spite of some problems. If these problems with lighting, noise and litter are addressed, there will be a very good future. ene Content: The content of the task is covered. Organisation and cohesion Well organised with use of headings and attention to cohesion Range Acceptable, though rather limited range of structures, Accuracy Generally accurate, with some awk: .wardiness of language (“good land- scaped grounds” “which not just bothering the residents, could”) Appropriacy of register and format Appropriate to the task. ‘Target reader Would be informed Marks awarded Band 3‘The target reader(s) for a Report is(are) usually an employer/supe- rior a college principal ora specific group of people (work col- leagues etc.).The purpose of the report i to assess the present situation oF past performance objectively ooking at both the good ‘and bad points, and make some suggestions on how to improve sping forward. Candidates are expected to use formal language and follow the writing conventions of a report, with the use of headings where appropriate Goo ‘The holiday complex has many effects on the envi- ronment and community. The purpose of this report is to tell the positive points ond the negative points of the holiday complex. There are a number of positive points, The complex is in good condition, and the landscape has been made. very well. Many extra trees have planted to improve the environment. Tt is like a beautiful park around: the complex. It provides employment and training for local people and this is a greet deal beneficial, There are no problems with management as it is very well managed. The following are the negative points. There is litter especially on the beach. The complex is noisy late at night and this is annoying all the people. On the other hand the canteen is a mess when it is full and the grounds of the complex are very dark and could be dangerous. There should be lights put around the grounds at night. to improve safety, and the canteen should be cleaned up. The people should be quiet at night and if they are not quiet at night they should pay money to be punished, Tf you do these things, it will be « bet- ter complex for the environment and the community SSmek Content: All points addressed, but the point about the canteen is misunderstood. Organisation and cohesion ‘Organised into paragraphs, but headings absent. Range Simple basic structures, Accuracy There are a number of errors: (“trees have planted”, “a great deal beneficial”) Appropriaey of register and format Reports need to use headings, ‘Target reader Would be partially informed. Marks awarded Band 2TEST 3 - PART 2 QUESTION 2 - ARTICLE Las = Content For Band 3 or above, the candidate's ARTICLE should ‘+ examine the advantages and disadvantages of tourism in your country * look at the effect that Both demestie and Foreign tourists have * discuss if there is a difference between these two classes fof tourists, Le. in their behaviour, attitude and expectations 14 Organisation and cohesion ‘Clearly organised into paragraphs with appropriace linking devices. Appropriacy of register and format Formal to unmarked. a Range Language of description, comparison and opinion. = Target reader Would be informed. Sample Script Last summer I went to a holiday on an island in my na- tive country, Greece. It was a beautiful island, but T did not have a good time, Tt was crowded, noisy, and there was nothing authentic about it. I know that for- eign tourism is financially the lifeblood of my country, but sometimes I wonder if it is worth it. There were so many problems caused by the tourists on this island, First of all, there were just too many. They were everywhere, and there were hotels, fast food restaurants and souvenir shops everywhere, There were even more bars and they were filled with young tourists drinking a lot of alcohol and behaving really terrible, The environment and beaches were de- stroyed, I don't think I'll ever go back there. ‘On the other hand, however, T know that the people living on that island are making good money. They live all the year off of what they earn in just a few months in the summer, and they have a good quality of life. If it wasn't for the tourists, many of them would have to leave the island to earn a living T suppose it is so shocking to me because as a domes- tic tourist I have different expectations, I want to see a place with its own unique character, while some foreign tourists only come for the sun in the day and a place to drink and dance at night. They do not recog- nize the character of the place is destroyed because they did not know it. Maybe I would be the same if I went abroed, but I can't imagine this happening, Senko Content; All points addressed. Organisation and cohesion Well orgenized with use of cohesive devices. bbut not very sophisticated. Accuracy ‘There ate a few non-impeding errors € Iwent to a holiday” “behaving really terrible” “recognize the character of the place is”). Appropriacy of register and format Personal account appropriate for an article, ‘Target reader Would be informed, and interested. Marks awarded Band 3‘An Article is usually written for a magazine/newspaper. The article expresses some opinion or comment and les main purpose isto in- ‘terest and engage the reader. Descriptions, examples and anecdotes are often appropriate, and effective answers will be lively and include some colourful use of language. Enns Traly is a country very popular with tourists. Many come to visit each year in the summertime. This bene- fits Italy very much, but also create problems, etieken Contents All points addressed, but little expansion, Expectations of different tourists not developed. Organisation and cohesion Adequate for the task Range Adequate for the task, though structures are rather limited, Accuracy ‘There are a number of errors (“they are using”, “Domestic tourists do no usually”, “and behave so outrageous” “being build”), Appropriacy of register and format ‘Mote appropriate for an essay than an article. Little attempt to engage with the reader. ‘Target reader Would be partially informed. Marks awarded Band 2 There are many ways that tourists benefit Ttaly, First of all they bring wealth into the country. Many people work in hotels and restaurants and other parts of the tourist industry and without the tourists they would have no jobs and no money, These people buy things from other people and make the whole country richer, In addition, tourists bring different views into ‘the country and people have a chance to meet others from all over the world Large numbers of tourists can also cause problems too, however. They sometimes put an extra strain on the environment, because they are using water, or throwing litter, or hotels are being build to hold them, They can make the streets and cities crowded for residents. Finally, some tourists drink a lot and be- have really outrageous, and this is bad for everyone. Of course, it depends where the tourists come from. Domestic tourists do no usually get so drunk and be- have so outrageous, Perhaps this is because they are not so far from home and so don't feel so free, or maybe it is just a different culture,TEST 10 - PART 2 QUESTION 3 - CONTRIBUTION Rae = Content 1 Organisation and cohesion For Band 3 or above, the candidate’s CONTRIBUTION must: ‘Clearly organised into paragraphs with appropriate * Describe what your ideal ob wud be linking devices, + Explain why tht would be ideal and how 1 Appropriacy of register and format ifs with your personaly, Any as longa is consistent + Sayf you think you nl actully have this ob = Range some diy, and why oF why not Language of desertion and speculation. = Target reader Wold be informed Tf I could do whatever job I want, I would be an actor, would prefer to act in movies, rather than TV or theatre, because that is the most popular medium. einen Content: All points addressed Organisation and cohesion Clearly organised and attention This job would be ideal for me because it is creative and aid to cohesion. exciting. You get to imagine that you are different kinds of Range people and try to experience and express their emotions. 4 * 200d fae of vocabulary and Actors also have the opportunity to travel a lot for their Accuracy work, and I love travelling more than anything. Successful Generally accurate, very few actors can earn a great deal of maney and become ex- ercors. . tremely popular and famous, and I think this would be a Appropriaey of register and for fantastic lifestyle. I am naturally extrovert, and T like to mat be the centre of attention whenever possible, so I think I Appropriate to the task, would thrive in this kind of life, Target reader Would be informed. Unfortunately, I doubt that Twill ever have this job. This ‘Marks awarded is because there are so many people who want to make it as. Band 3 film actors, and so it is very competitive. Tt is expensive ‘to go to film school, and sometimes getting hired is more a matter of luck or who you know rather than what you know, onyway, Zoom afraid that following this career would be a waste of time and money and I would end up disappointed, That is why I am studying economics, and not acting. I believe to become an actor is not a reclistic goal.‘A Contribution to a longer piece is written for someone whois in the process of collecting information for use ina larger document (e.g.a book, 3 {guidebook or a piece of research). Its aim isto supply information and ex- press an opinion. ‘Students need to identify what the longer document is (as indicated in the ‘22k instructions) and then decide what an appropriate style for their contr- bution would be (formal, informal ete) Goes The ideal occupation that I would like to have is to be a doctor. It is a difficult job and first you have to study for a long time and then you will have to work too hard when you are starting out. However at the end you end up with a very good career. The studies to become a doctor are very difficult. It would be better not to work in a hospital because that is really chaotic. To work in a clinic would be much better, but it is not always easy te get the position, It is also a sad job because you see many people with problems and sometimes you can not save them from their problem but then sometimes you can and this is when it is rewarding and you feel very happy. Furthermore, it is an occupation where all the people have respect for you. Doctors have a good status, You can also earn alot of money and have a nice lifestyle. Examiner Comments Content: How the job matches the writer's personality is not covered. It doesn’t mens. tion whether it is achievable to become 3 doctor. i Organisation and cohesion Not clearly organise. Fist long paragraph should be divided Range Basie structures and not very advance vocabulary. : Accuracy Generally accurate; very few errors. -, Appropriacy of register and format Appropriate to the task ‘Target reader ‘Would be partially informed. Marks awarded Band 2 I plan to become a doctor one day and be able te help other people.EXAMPLE QUESTION QUESTION - INFORMATION SHEET - ‘Task: You werk fora tourise agency, and you have been asked to write up an information sheet to hand out to visitors when they arrive in your ely. Ie should include Information on the following points ‘main areas of interest, + how to get around, + usual opening hours of shops. + what to be cautious about. = Content = Organisation and cohesion For Band 3 or above, the candidates information sheet shoulé: Clearly organised into paragraphs with appropriate + include the main areas of interest linking devices. + cxplain how to got around 1 Appropriacy of register and format + state the usval opening hours of shops ‘Aaya long a8 tis consistent + mention what te be cautious about = Range Language of description, comparison and explanation. w Target reader Would be informed. Welcome to the city of Athens! You will find that there are many great things to do and see here. But first, we want to give you some information to get started. Main areas of interest Visitors spend most time in an area between Thiseio and ‘Syntagma stations. From Thiseio you may take a wide foot- path up to the Acropolis area, Below the Acropolis is Plaka with many scenic streets and cafes and Monastiraki with all the shops. From Monastiraki to Syntagma is the main shop- g area, Content: All points addressed. Organisation and cohesion Clearly organised, with headings. Little attention paid to cohesion however. Range ‘A good range of vocabulary and structure Accuracy Generally accurate, very few er- rors. Appropriacy of register and for- mat Appropriate to the task, factual style. ‘Target reader Would be informed. Marks awarded Band 3 How to get around There is good public transportation. The metro is convenient and easy fo use. You take a ticket for one euro from the ma- chines in the station and it is good for up to 90 minutes. You must remember to stamp the ticket before you go or it is not valid and you could be fined, You will see taxis every- where. Be sure to check the taxi-metre because they will overcharge if given the opportunity. There are also plenty of buses but they can be crowded and uncomfortable. ‘Shop opening hours This varies. It is typical to find shops closing at two or three on Mondays and Wednesdays and staying open till 8pm. on Tuesdays and Thursdays. In the areas with many fourists, shops can be open till after midnight Caution You must always be aware of your possessions. There are people who will stee! bags if given the opportunity. Also be- ware of traffic. It does not always stop for pedestrians; keep you eyes open! Sometimes the pavements are very un- even so watch your step.‘An Information sheet is written in order to provide information or i= structions about something, le needs to be clearly organised, sometimes ‘with headings, and ineludes factual information or advice on a topic Candidates should be aware who the target reader is and they should ‘ko try t0 Include al the information necessary for the reader to be informed Rasa There are many places you can see in Nice. The first place to go is Old Town. Then Castle Hill, Cours Saleya and Palais Lascaris, You can go everywhere by metro it is easy. There are special sites being shown in many metro stetions. It is interesting and educational. Tf you take the bus you will be crowded, There are ‘many buses and it can be confusing. Taxis are very good. Not expensive if you make sure they use the metre and do not overcharge. Sometimes they will pick up two different people who are going in the same direction, This is typical. You should also know some information about the shops. They will open in the morning and close in the. afternoon about 2. On Tuesday and Thursday they open up again for evening. Banks close at 3 in the af- ‘ternoon, It is most easy to do the shopping in the morning. T think you will enjoy your time in Nice, It’s an amaz- ing place, a lively, vibrant city! EE ‘Comments Content: Most points addressed, though not expanded. There is no mention of what you should be cautious about. Organisation and cohesion Attempts organisation in paragraphs, but ideas are mixed between paragraphs sometimes, Little attention to cohesion, Range Rather limited. Aceuracy There are a few basic errors (“you will be crowded” “It is most easy”) Appropriaey of register and format Generally consistent but could be more factual. Would benefit from headings, ‘Target reader Would be partially informed. Marks awarded Band 2JUSTIFICATIONS OF THE ANSWERS TEST 1 Reading Justifications Part1 1. The correct answers ©. Paragraph 1, "Some tess is Inewabe— i's an inherent par of geting tings don, of moving tings on. Thee is no ee eco stess being yd or your ea so is wrong, 86 wrong because ‘though “the more stressful the jo. the greater the pay”. a well-paid job does! not necessanly mean a'god ob. Dis wrong because te wir reer to “managing cher (aration team of salespeople) sess 2 The cores answers ,Peagranh, Moe amazing is sess tat ites ‘o..demands being made on youthat exceed your expectations ofthejob” so 1s unpre, t's not 8 because “hysial samp” iless) war you your under stress but i's not oo iat to deal wth Cis wrong necause ‘yu’ ned to eatse your under tess and is wrong decause you need to now the cause and the "work ol goo stages “to reduce sss. 8. The correct answer is D. Paragraph 1. Somala “wa lft without a func: toning goverment 1961". Tis means A and ca be right cause there is no govemment. t's notO because these cseases are nt ne t's jst there, 1s ‘no eft eanval autor’ ta ep the anole ih aganst seas. 4-The coeet answer iC. The wit uses persuasive language to encourage Dope to conbute “Is only wth your help tat we don't Have to wal fr funding”."your contbuon i a val a tha fou fd sta, persuasion ‘vans D.ésnot igh, 1S nat “Thats why we make no apologies” and rat A bacause the wre tas abut treating diseases and nealing wounds 5. he conectansweris A. "Paragraph 2. “he meda has ahugeetfect on our! stifimage and wat sie and shape we deem it accepahe to be", The mea? “has an eet” on people's image but doesn’ ‘discourage’ unneathy nena Tour 0 8 is nat rig is wrong because TV is not mentoned and Dist wrong because “qu few mon", which s more than ‘elativly fe’, el! they mee ode. : 5. The corect answers B, Pararan 2 "we had one milion ewer obese! people” there would be less cases of heart disease, diabetes and high blood! pressure. Classis netmentoned so Ais wrong, Cs wong betause obey ‘causes disease (0 rise. The fact that teenagers are vulnerable to “peer and: ‘media pressure™ which cen lead tissues just as damaging 2s obesity fr | example, anorenla, roles out. Part 2 I 7. The cores cole is Fa general pararap, which inodues the Ma! tmaray Rai Tunel Projet, te ‘audacious enghesing projec’ refered to in; |the last sentence of he previous paanraph, Paragraph F. ao discusses the | 28ocited potential earthquake problem and, a he following paraoraoh des! no fr to geological problems hs ues out paragraphs AC, E, and G. 8. The coreet choice fB. tanulis divided between Europe and Asi by the Bosphorus Stat and Paragraph 8. refers to two road ges crossing the | sa. Paragraph 8 ls refers tothe Sutan's suggestion, and inte folowing aragragh the cream is becoming a reay | 8. The correct answer is D. asthe las semnce inthe previous paragraph | to “ra al and in paragraph D weread about “raving glock’ and "io overcrowe oad bridges. Te ast sentence af paragraph D. aks bout, 22 uporated ra sans and me rst serene lhe next paragraph continues ‘is thome, also rung outparagreps A, C Ean | 419. Theconect choices 6 asthe previous paragraph deserbes the process | of buiang the tunnel and paragraph 6 explains tat although it oulng the? tunel ‘might sound straightarwara, thee isa problem witha geological! faulting known as he NAF. The folowing peragragh desrbes ne NAF So this! "les out, wich tks about designing tunnels to wiatandearthquales. 11. The corect answer is A. because we read that “earthquakes along the NAF ae common” and the nest pararaph continues te theme, refering to arthquoes ‘along he HAF” as seing up alarger one 12. The correct choices ©. because Itretersto an earthquake striking Istanbul | andthe folowing paragraph discusses the possibilty o this happening, /Part 3 418. The corect answer is C. Paragraph 2. “same people may not know thie ‘accounts have bean aided”. Kentty thet is "far ahead of mugging” so t's ‘ot A. Itcost 1.7bn inthe UK but how serous itis compared to the US is ol stated So 8. isnot right. Dis wrong because i's in order to Keep their ‘time prof low” that reves donot empty an aecourt. 14, The carect answer is D. Paragraph 3, Glen Hastings says t's easy, you only need tobe able o read and write I's not A because computer skis help but trey are not ‘essential. Banks len to people wit “excelent ereit "records" so. is wrong. D. is wrong because he never repaid he money, 18. The oorect answer's 8. Paragraph 3 he e-mortgaged “the property for | £210,000, which he than took out othe country”, I's not A, because rent \was pad in advance”. Re-mortgaging property means getting a loan, Using te property as cofateral 30 C. fs wrong, D. is wrong because he sed the teacher’ identity to “gt loan 16. The correct answer is A, paragraph 5. “he only stle For banks... and big stores — never ths kt guy”. Hastings talks about the sympathetic teat- ment of victims’ by banks sos nat Bs nat Cas detection, or being ‘caught are not referred to. is banks and credit ard companies that are sympatheti¢ so that rules out O. 17. The corect answer is A, Paragraph 6, because “she ft ‘stunned, Uupset and vilateg” and not angry oil sa t cant be B. or G. San actress She takes ‘ther people's identi’ but ste wasn't play-actng and “burst into tears" sos nat 0. 18. The correct answer is D. Paragraph 6. ‘concealed gadgety’ was used to | “steal her pin and clone her card”. k's not A. as her card was copied. I's Not 8. because ney used ito test the limit and waited until ater midnight to Use it again. The building society canceled her caré but we don't know ial the money was taken so i's nat. 18. The comect answeris 8. Paragraph 8 the credit card company was allan by checking the use of her card. I's not D. because te finance company can ‘detect’ not solve these cases. A. is obviously wrong and ‘the fac that people themselves can detect card fraud makes ©. incorrect Part 4 20. D. "Get into the festival spit by trying out kayaking, water pola and 4 variety of other water sports fr tes", 21, 6 “Proson’s Asian communty wil stage..with demonstrations ftom ‘some ot Europe's top chet’ 22.8, “The festival kicks off on May Day in Sydney Street wth the “Gileren's Classics” parade of 4,000 charen” 28. € “The images alilusrate ie in the city of London”. 24. 8, “the opportunity to have arden 2 hot air balloon” 26... “there wil also bea proms inthe park” an open alt cinema® 26. D “there wil also be unarmed combat cispays by the Reyel Marines 27. A.“its @ good chance to pickup 2 potertal masterpiece” 28. F. “a concert ge by Mereury music Pie 2000 nominee Nitin Savtiney" ‘special storyteling atterioons far chiéren by some of Ban's leaging autnors* “unarmed combat dsplays....t0 raise money for chaty* “cookaty workshops given by te ety’ indian and hinese communities” ‘Blue Badge guides wil lead tours around Liverpool Landmarks” “a performance by Ladysmith biack Mombazo at St Paul's Cathedral” “wi human mannequin window displays at Jaroa's department store’, 29.8. 30.0. atc. 92.0. BRE 34.8.Use of English Justifications Part 2 1. focus on (prepostional word) = focus is almost ainays [always inthis ‘context followed by the preposition on - focus on means the same as con- ‘contrat on, 14. Both each and every are used with singular nouns, were itis implied ‘that an action wil happen more than once or be repested. “Each breath you take" - because you take repeated breaths. 15. take a breath (expression) = breathe, esoire. 16. In fact/ in short = inking words used in order to illustrate / sum- ‘marise a poi 17. yet = linking word, expressing contrast 18, be aware of = have ar show a(an) knowledge / understanding / re ‘ation / perception of something 19, exactly / precisely = adverbs of manner: usually ther position is after the verb or after the verb + object 20. could / should = modal verbs; exoress suggestion / poss specuiaon 21, getting / doing = present participles that replace a trst -conditional sentence. (f we doit right.) 22, “These” refers to the heath benefits previously mentioned. Include ‘means invoive and or offen implies an incomplete listing of attributes / parts / contents / factors ike here: “1 teling more relaxed and [2] being ‘more mentaly aler.” - an incomplete list of heath benefits. 23. we use some with countable plural nouns inthe affirmative [whereas any is also used with countable plural nouns but in interragative or nega: tiva clauses) 24. such as is used for Introducing examples (bloating and stomach pains, dizziness ete) 25. means = missing ver; to mean - what something is defined as or re- sls in (has as its result outcome] - ‘poor breathing means [has as its re- sullor outcome! that you don't gt enough oxygen". 26. actualy / really = adverbs used as linking words to express realty. 27. miss out on (idiom) = to lose the chance to do something / get some- ‘thing / achleve something ¢.0. missed out an the pramation it you ae inte habit of doing some thing, you do regularly or often, 44, have a good chance of (expression) = there strong Exelinaed/ pos- silty of ding something or of something happening 45, nol so much .. as = serves as clarification of 2 purpose function ae- tion feeling. "W's not so much a career as a hobby "The gurpose ofthis activity (is reeretional rather than professional, 46. it goes without saying (expression) = something is so obvious that t need nt be said 47. something strikes somebody as = has en emotional ar cognitive im pact upon them e.g, “This behavior struck me as od¢" 48. no matter how + adverb + simple pas, !couldt make = 2* type of ‘conditional which describes an unfulfilled condition in the present. 49. struggle + ull infinitive, Let slone = much less, nota mention 50. such + vorb fo be + noun + that clause = inverted clause of resut, used for empnasts. tening Justifications Part 1 EXTRACT 1 1..G- He was il but did die, Jane says the writer had been serousty i Bill agrees; "..;t was touch and go for & while”, This means he almost