Cover

Copyright
Wanna bet?
By R.S Burnett
Copyright 2013 R.S Burnett

License Notes

This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This eBook
may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like
to share this book with another person, please purchase an
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please return and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting
the hard work of this author.
 Acknowledgments
Everyone who emailed me and answered my
questions via twitter.
Dave for putting up me when I regularly checked out
of the real world to live inside my head, even
though I shouted at you a lot when you kept trying
to talk to me, I love you. I’m sorry.
My mum for letting me rant and rave and cry and
laugh whenever I felt like it, and for passing on your
love of a good book to me but please don’t read
anything I write, it would be like reading my diary or
something. I’m sorry.
Most importantly, you, for reading this book.

Much love and I hope you enjoy this book as much

as I enjoyed writing it.
 Table of contents

Table of Contents
Cover 1
Copyright 2
Acknowledgments 3
Table of contents 4
Chapter One 6
Chapter Two 24
Chapter Three 33
Chapter Four 49
Chapter Five 67
Chapter Six 76
Chapter Seven 88
Chapter Eight 100
Chapter Nine 111
Chapter Ten 120
Chapter Eleven 137
Chapter Twelve 162
Chapter Thirteen 170
Chapter Fifteen 185
Chapter Sixteen 194
Chapter Seventeen 204
Chapter Eighteen 208
Chapter Nineteen 228
Chapter Twenty 250
Chapter Twenty One 290
Chapter Twenty Two 301
Chapter Twenty Three 319
Chapter Twenty Four 327
Chapter Twenty Five 339
Chapter Twenty Six 350
Chapter Twenty Seven 355
Chapter Twenty Eight 365
Chapter Twenty Nine 379
Chapter Thirty 387
Chapter Thirty One 398
Epilogue 404
About the author 410
Hope – A sneak peek. 411
Chapter One 411
You two were forever 411
 Chapter One
I lower my head as I make my way into the café avoiding the eyes of the other
students. I make my way over to my usual table in the corner noticing that Sophie is
already seated. I glance up and look around the room. I know I don’t have to keep my
head down to avoid conversation; no one is really that interested in talking to me. I’m
not typically pretty and wear baggy clothes to cover my figure.
I sit down next to Sophie and start picking at my lunch while she tells me all about
the party she’s headed to this weekend, I honestly can’t keep up with her social life,
she seems to go to a party every other night. Sophie’s not the typical type of girl that
I’d get along with but as soon as we came here and were put in a dorm together we
quickly became close friends. She’s popular where I only have a few friends, she’s
loud to my quiet but she is also one of the most caring people I have ever met, apart
from her long term boyfriend Matthew.
We are soon joined by one of Sophie’s friends from the dance club and Matthews’s
cousin Tucker, they both sit on the opposite side of the table rather than take the
empty seats next to us which I appreciate.
“Who’s your friend Soph?”
I look up to see him staring at me, knowing we have met many times before at
parties but he has always been pre-occupied with his entourage of girls. I roll my eyes
and return my attention back texting my mum trying to get out of going down there
this weekend.
“Brooke. You two have met before right?” Sophie asks me looking confused.
“I’m not sure” I mutter not looking up from my phone.
“No I would definitely have remembered you, I’m Tucker” I look up to see his hand
outstretched.
“Pleasure, I’m sure” I say shaking his hand briefly then turning my attention back
to my phone.
“What’s going on, you’re very occupied this afternoon” Sophie asks me trying to
peak a look at my phone.
“Trying to get out of a party tomorrow at my mums” I explain dropping my phone
back into my bag at my feet.
“Is he going to be there?” she asks but the concern on her face is quickly replaced
by an adoring smile as Matthew takes the seat next to her.
“Hey baby, who’s he?” Matt asks her, using the same emphasis and pulling the
same face Sophie did moments ago referring to our conversation.
“He is no one” I quickly put in before Soph can give away too much “And yes he
most definitely will be there” I add to Soph.
“I can go with you if you need me, you know that right” she whispers to me while
Matt talks to Tucker about their weekend plans.
“I know but if I do go I’ll ask Luke so it’s not a problem I know you have plans this
weekend anyway”
“Hey, how come you never come out with us lot?” Tucker asks me while staring at
my chest that is thankfully completely covered in the baggy hooded jumper I’m
wearing with my baggy jogging bottoms, It’s not that I’m ashamed with my body it’s
just that I hate men staring at it and checking me out so blatantly.
“I’m busy” Is all I offer as an excuse, no need to explain that I only go out about
once a month.
I reach into my bag to get my phone that’s just started ringing. I freeze when I see
the name on the screen, I snap my head up and start looking for an escape knowing
that there is no need but rational thought escapes me. Tucker and Matthew are
exchanging confused glances between staring at me but Sophie reaches over takes
the phone from me and answers it smoothly. I faintly listen to her side of the
conversation and try to appear normal.
“Hello” she smiles at me as she chirps happily into the phone.
“No, Brooke’s just popped out a minute”
“Of course I can”
I catch her wincing and know it’s not good. “Ok I’ll tell her, bye” she hands me back
the phone and doesn’t say anything else.
“Thanks”
I jump when I feel to strong hands cover my eyes from behind and almost fall out
of chair. “Guess who?” A husky voice whispers in my ear.
“Luke!” I squeal and jump up to wrap my arms around him, he swings me around
laughing and a settles me back on my feet with a kiss on the cheek, I sit back down
and he sits on the other side of me.
“Missed me huh?” he smirks at me.
“When did you get back?” I ask grinning before he has a chance to reply Sophie
clears her throat beside me.
“Sorry” still grinning I return my attention to the table “Tucker, Matt this is Luke.
Luke, Matthew: Sophs boyfriend and his cousin Tucker” I make the introductions,
Tucker looks surprised that I know he’s Matt’s cousin and looks at me as if trying to
remember if we have met before. I smirk just as a very busty blonde comes over and
sits next to him; his attention is immediately on her.
“Do you think Kate would mind if I borrowed you for the day tomorrow?”
“No why?” Luke asks while helping himself to the burger on my plate.
“I need you to play the part of my very over protective boyfriend at my mums” I
explain.
He looks at me knowingly and nods his acceptance.
“Anything I should be worried about?” I ask Sophie referring to the phone call she
took for me.
“Just make sure you go to the party” she says apologetically
“Right I need to go, I’ll catch up with you all later” I call as I leave to head towards
my next class.

“So is he your boyfriend?” I turn to see Tucker following beside me.

“Who?” I feign confusion just because I’ve been asked this question so many times
before.
“Luke” he replies with an exaggerated eye roll.
“No”
“Fuck buddy?” he asks causing me to stumble
“Friend” I say disgusted that anyone could think I would just casually sleep with
anyone.
“Mmm hmm” he mummers as if in thought. I carry on walking and ignore him.
I’m completely aware that he’s still walking next to me as we make our way across
campus, not because my body seems to be aware of him but because I can faintly
hear different people calling out greetings to him as we pass, I put my head down
and pick up my pace, not wanting anyone to notice me, he catches up with me easily.
“Is there a reason you are here?” I snap at him, irritated that he hasn’t left me
alone yet.
“I’m going to class” he says as if stating the obvious. I throw a glare his was as he
follows me into the lecture hall. I make my way over to my usual seat and pull out my
notebook and pen, I huff dramatically when he takes the vacant seat next to mine in
the corner of my eye I can see him smirking at me. I’m just about to make some sort
of sarcastic comment to him when my phone beeps beneath me, thankful for the
distraction I reach for it and look at the screen.

Cassie: Who’s the hottie sat next to you?

I turn in my seat to look at where Cassie and two of her friends are giggling in the
back, she winks at me, I turn around disgusted at the child like behavior coming from
them and pass my phone to Tucker.
“I have to say it normally doesn’t take this long to get a girls number” he winks at
me grinning.
“I’m assuming the message is about you as there is no one else sitting next to me”
I reply begrudgingly, he reads the message and looks at me questioningly I gesture to
the back row with my head, he turns and seems amused as he starts texting back
and forth with the girls in the back. “Please delete all the messages when you are
finished”
“Jealous?” he asks cocking an eyebrow at me.
I roll my eyes at him making him grin.
“No I just like to keep my dinner down if possible”
He flicks his eyes over my body assessing and frowns before turning back to the
texting. I plug my iPod in and blank out the class as I wait for the lecture to start,
after about ten minutes I’m poked in the side I turn with a restrained sigh and Tucker
winks at me before standing and leaving the class closely followed by Cassie, I sigh
and shake my head, wondering what is wrong with the world. The lecture finally
begins and I concentrate on taking notes and copying down quotes from the studying
material.

As I leave the room I’m stopped in tracks by the sight of Matt leaning up against
the wall in front of me.
“Hey” I smile as I make my way towards him.
“Tucker gave me this to give to you” he cocks an eyebrow at me as he hands me
my phone back.
“Thanks I was worried about that, I didn’t know when I would get it back”
“Any reason why he had it? I didn’t realize you two were friends”
“We’re not, one of the girls in the class text me asking who he was, I passed him
my phone so he could message her himself and when they left shortly after he took
my phone with him” I explain as we make our way outside and I head to the coffee
stand.
“Well as long as it isn’t your heart he’s breaking” he smirks at me.
“I’m not sure I’m his type” I return dryly, momentarily distracted by the smell of
coffee that’s strong in the air making me smile widely. Matt, used to my addiction by
now thanks to being in the dorm I share with Sophie just rolls his eyes and chuckles at
me. I playfully shove his shoulder and jump in the queue.
“So big party tomorrow huh?” he asks
“Uh yeah, something like that” I’m not sure how much of my home life he knows
about from Sophie, I know she may have mentioned a few things to him in passing,
which I understand and assure her regularly that that’s OK as long as he keeps the
information to himself.
“You know, I can always help out if you need me, never be afraid to ask”
“Never be afraid to ask what?” comes from behind, causing both of us to spin
around to see Tucker standing there, eyeing us curiously.
 “Uh .. if she needs me and Sophie to stay over mine instead of their dorm, you
know if we get too much” Matt quickly says, sending me an I-got-it-covered smile.
“Ahh so you’re a prude” Tucker says swiping my coffee and taking a sip.
“Ugh you can keep it” I muttered backing away from the drink he keeps trying to
hand me back.
“What?” he asks looking offended but ruining the effect by looking slightly amused
at my reaction
“I don’t know where your mouth has been, and as far as I can tell you have no
standards so I’ll pass on that thanks” I state turning to get another coffee hoping he
will leave it at that, I’m not so lucky when I turn back around he is staring at me open
mouthed.
“I have never been with an ugly woman!” he argues.
“You’ve never been with one that can tie her own shoe laces either” I return with a
wink and walk off leaving Matt chuckling and Tucker mumbling about not knowing if
that is true or not. I grin to myself as I wonder whether he was referring to me or
himself not having that knowledge.

***

The next morning I’m woken up by my phone beeping and a text message that
make me want to cry.

Luke: Sorry hun, can’t make it today, went to a party last night, Kate fell
and broke her arm we’re still at the hospital waiting for her cast to be put
on xx
Me: OK not a problem. Hope she gets better soon xx
Sighing and throwing my legs over the bed, I sit up and glance at my wardrobe
thinking about what I can wear today that will be the safest option, not that what ever
I wear will save me. Defeated I get up and throw on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt
covered by a big woolly jumper. Grabbing a cup of coffee I head out for the drive.
An hour later I get the familiar queasy feeling in my stomach that I always get
when ever I’m near my mums house, resigning to stay only for an hour or two I drag
myself out of the car and into the house.
“Honey, I missed you when are you going to start visiting more often?” My mum
cries as she throws her arms around me, this of course is just a show for the group of
her friends that have made it over here before me, what they can’t see is my wincing
from her sharp nails digging into the back of my neck and her harsh whispers in my
ears threatening to behave and not embarrass her. When she finally lets me go, I
head into the kitchen where my half- brother is making drinks.
“Hey sis, how’s life?” Phin asks handing me glass of orange juice. We take a seat at
the kitchen table and chat for most of the morning about school and catching up in
general, he asks a lot of questions about Sophie and I can’t hide the smile that takes
over my face whenever he talks about my roommate, since meeting her six months
ago he has had a crush on her, which she finds adorable and flirts with him at every
opportunity.

I excuse my self and make my way to the bathroom as the rest of the guests arrive
and lunch is being dished out. As soon as I make it to the bathroom I am momentarily
pushing back the stars that have taken over my vision as I’m slammed into the door
from behind, a hand covers my mouth and I stop breathing when a familiar voice is in
my ear whispering harshly. “In the bathroom now, not a noise from you” I nod and
open the door slowly, he pushes me inside and follows behind me not taking his hand
from my mouth. After he locks the door behind us he kicks my legs out from under
me. Slammed into the cold bathroom tile I resist the urge to rub my knees from the
fall knocking them on the hard tiles. I look up and watch as my step dad leans over
me and pulls my hair. “I see you still haven’t changed, still the same whore you have
always been” he snarls at me spitting every time he says something, I cringe inwardly
at the spit that is gathering around his mouth and my stomach turns. “Have you got a
boyfriend yet?” he asks me while pulling up the sleeves on his old grey long sleeved
shirt that has a few cigarette burns in the front. I know I need to answer his question
but as I take in his appearance from his worn top to his equally old jogging bottoms
and odd socks I’m transported back to when I turned thirteen and my life turned into
this nightmare, granted he may never have raped me but what he done to me on an
almost daily basis is just as bad. Of course I could have told but he threatened to kill
me if I told anyone and on a few occasions he used to take it upon himself to show
me how much he meant that promise by choking me until I started to loose
consciousness and then letting go and letting me come back to and he would repeat
the process three times, every time he thought I was getting close to telling
someone. I’m brought of out my memories by a sharp blow to my jaw, my head
slams to the side and hits the corner of the sink, I can already taste the blood filling
my mouth but block the pain out. It’s then I realise he never expected me to answer
he was going to do this anyway, as a punishment for leaving it too long since my last
visit. He needs my visits so he can exercise this control over someone, he doesn’t
hurt his son, he used to tell me how Phin is perfect and I’m nothing but a dirty little
whore, and I deserve to be with my dad. Of course the irony is that I would have gone
with my dad in a heartbeat if I could have but he died when I was eleven. I manage to
block out the next few kicks and thankfully we are interrupted by my mum shouting
up the stairs for him to join them for lunch. He leaves me lying on the bathroom floor
and leaves the bathroom silently. I wait a few minutes until I hear him talking beneath
me in the kitchen. Leaving as quietly as I can without whimpering in pain and
clutching at my side where his foot connected with my ribs I make my way through
the backdoor so I can leave unnoticed I get back in my car and head back to my life,
knowing that at least for another month I can forget that the family I just left even
exists.

Pulling up in front of the dorms I notice

Sophie’s car is in the car park, not ready to try walking again I pull out my phone
and call her.
“Hey Soph, are you in the dorm?”
“Yeah, where are you”
“I’m outside init he car park if you need a lift to the party?”
“Umm yeah do you want to come up for ten minutes first, I know how you hate the
long drive back, is Luke with you?”
“Umm no, he couldn’t make it”
“What?”
“Katie broke her arm they were at the hospital this morning so he couldn’t come
with me”
“Umm ok, are you going to come up?”
“No, I’ll just wait down here for you, if that’s ok?”
“How bad is it?”
“I don’t think I can handle the stairs”
“Shit, we’ll be down now”
“Who’s we?”
“Just me and Matt”
 “Great, just be prepared when you come down Soph, It’s bad, I’m a bit of a mess”
“Do you want me to stay in with you tonight?”
Sighing I decline her offer and wince as I feel my lip.
“See you in a minute” she hangs up. Holding my breath I chance a look in the
mirror, cringing at how bad it looks, I start rubbing the dried blood from chin and the
cut by my eye brow, I’m not brave enough to run a brush through my hair so I throw
it up in a loose pony tail but the lump on the back of my head is unavoidable, I
immediately pull my hair back down so it’s loose around my shoulders again,
remembering the nail marks that are no doubt visible in my neck.

My passenger door opens and Sophie leans in, I keep my head down and close my
eyes silently willing myself to keep it together at least until I’m on my own.
“Brooke look at me” My head snaps up at the sound of Matt’s voice, I look around
but Sophie isn’t with him “I’m on my own” he informs me while running his gaze of
every bump, scrape, cut and already forming bruise on my face, I don’t miss the way
he winces when he sees my jaw that has already started to swell. “Anywhere else?”
he asks looking as though he’s dreading the answer, I can only nod “Where?” he
concern is my undoing and I feel a lone tear run down my cheep making me flinch
when it touches the cup on my lip “My ribs, and left ankle” I whisper but know that
he’s close enough to have heard. I watch as he sighs heavily and comes around to
my door. He smiles at me and politely ignores the way I flinch away from him as he
lifts me from the car and continues to carry me into the building and up the stairs to
my room.
“How is she? I ask as he sets me down on my feet and pulls my arm around his
shoulders to help me walk as we get to the door
“Worried” he says full of sympathy, I nod and take a deep breath as he opens the
door and we enter the room, he helps me walk over to Sophie’s bed and sits me
down. I manage to wince only once and hold back the groan as my ribs protest at the
awkward position.
“Brooke, what the hell were you thinking going alone?” Sophie demands as she sits
next to me on the bed and brings a wet cloth to my face to wipe away any dried
blood that I missed during my inspection in the car.
I’m saved from answering her when my phone rings, already knowing who it is I
prepare myself for the normal phone call I always get after my ‘visits’.
“Hello”
“Are you home yet?” My step dad hisses into the phone.
“Yeah”
“Who’s there?” he demands as usual.
“Just me and Sophie no one else” I reply knowing that if he knew there were any
men in my room, next time will be worse, I chance a glance around the room Matt
turns away from me not before I catch a glimpse of the pure rage on his face.
“Remember, you tell anyone…”
“Yeah I know, I die” I finish for him.
“Very well, see you soon, wear something nice next time, I have something a little
different planned, something we have never done before, in fact wear a skirt” he
laughs down the phone at me before he hangs up. I can only stare at the phone, he
basically just told me in advance that he’s going to rape me, he has never even
hinted at it before I don’t doubt for a second that he means it, I’m a little surprised it
has taken this long but that doesn’t stop my stomach from turning. I somehow
manage to throw myself off the bed and toward the bathroom where I make it just in
time to empty my stomach in the toilet.
A few minutes pass and I think I can hear Sophie crying softly but I can’t be sure
because there is a slight ringing in my ears, Matt comes in hands me a glass of water
and some tissue. I weakly smile my thanks to him and think that he’s going to leave
but instead he closes the door and sits down next to me on the bathroom floor, I
notice that he is careful to sit a small distance away from me and makes sure not to
touch me, I can’t help the snort that escapes my mouth from thinking that just a few
hours ago I was in a similar situation but yet completely different.
“Any reason for your sudden need to loose whatever you have eaten?” he asks me
softly.
“I can’t go back there on my own, ever again” I say struggling for breath, belatedly
I realise I’m crying.
“Well I would have said that months ago”
“No he told me to wear a skirt next time” I say between sobs as the reality of it hits
me.
“He didn’t … today did he?” he asks stiffening slightly.
My body shakes with the sobs that come when I realise how I only narrowly
escaped that fate today, If he is thinking it then there is no reason why he didn’t do it
today.
“That son of a bitch!” Matt shouts next to me making me jump.
“No, no not today, he said next time” I rush to tell him when I realise he took my
silence for the wrong answer.
“Damn it Brooke there isn’t going to be a next time” he sighs “why didn’t you call
me? I would have come with you, I told you this yesterday” he says more softly and
seemingly has his temper controlled.
“I didn’t want to bother you, I knew you had plans to go to the party, which your
missing by the way, you should get a move on, you’re already late” he just stares at
me looking at a loss for words.
“Could you help me up please?” I ask him softly seemingly bringing him out of his
trance. Once he has set me down on my own bed I clear my throat getting their
combined attention. “I think you should both leave now, I have kept you from your
party long enough, if you could help me down the stairs I’ll give you all a ride over
there” I announce.
“No, we’ll stay” Sophie says softy making her way over to my bed and gingerly
putting her arm around me.
“No, I would really like to be on my own … honestly I can deal with it better that
way, I’m probably just going to go to sleep after I’ve iced my jaw”
I’m woken up by the sounds of someone opening and closing drawers and
cupboards in our little kitchenette. I pull my eyes open and frown at the sight of a
topless Tucker moving around in my kitchen muttering “coffee” to himself.
“In the freezer” I say amused as he drops a cup at the sound of my voice.
He spins around to face me smiling sheepishly “Morning, sorry I didn’t mean to
wake you”.
I throw my legs over the side of my bed and gingerly stand to test my ankle.
There’s only a little pain so I limp my way over to him.
“What are you doing here?” I ask moving around him to start the process of
making coffee.
“Umm ... Matt and Sophie took my room last night, his room mate had a few guys
over and you were here so they kicked me out and sent me here” He explains as he
watches me pour the coffee beans into the machine.
“Can’t you just use the stuff from a jar?” He asks and laughs at the look I send him.
“Not is you want a decent cup of coffee” I sigh bending over to inhale the scent as
coffee drips down into the pot.
“You’re crazy” he laughs at me.
 “You’re crazy” he laughs at me.
“No, I just like coffee” I return getting two mugs down and pouring us both a cup
before taking a seat at the table.
He sits opposite me and frowns at me.
“What?” I ask warily.
“What happened to your jaw?”
I lift my hand up to touch it and although it’s not swollen it’s sore so I’m guessing
from the way he winces when I do that I have a bruise on it. “Slipped in the bathroom
caught it on the tub”
“Ouch”
“I didn’t keep you up last night did I?” I ask trying to keep my expression blank as I
remember all the nights I’ve kept Sophie up screaming and shouting from my
nightmares.
“Umm ... no why? You was asleep when I came in” he replies watching me
curiously.
“No reason, I usually keep Sophie up most of the night that’s all”
“I’m a light sleeper and slept right through so you must have been quiet” he smirks
at me.
I feel my jaw drop open as what he’s implying I was doing finally registers in my
brain and glare at him.
I’m completely caught off guard when he raises his hand towards me I watch wide
eyed as it comes closer and before I can stop it I flinch away from him just has his
hand comes up next to my face.
He quickly pulls his hand away and his eyebrows pull in together. I turn my
attention to my coffee when I am no longer able to bare his questioning eyes.
A few minutes of silence pass and I hear him sigh.
“You didn’t slip in the bathroom did you?” He asks quietly.
“I did” I reply sternly not looking up from cup.
“Brooke…”
“I’m going to take a shower” I cut him off and push away from the table.
When I come out of the bathroom the room is empty, I rush through getting
dressed and dry my hair. Making another cup of coffee I settle down into a full day of
studying for a test I have on Monday.
 Chapter Two

“What’s he staring at?” Sophie whispers in my ear. I look and over to where she is
glaring at someone.
I shrug. “He’s in one of my classes” I smile over to Jason and he gets up to start
heading our way. “Oh shit” I whisper to her and watch as Jason takes the seat next to
me.
“Hi Brooke” he says smiling at me.
“Hey” I smile back not sure what he’s doing because we have only spoken a few
words to each other since we met at the beginning of the year.
“I was thinking it would be good if we went out sometime” he says taking me off
guard.
“Umm…”
“I know we haven’t really spoken but I’d really like the chance to get to know you”
I’m aware that he is waiting for me to say something but I just there staring at him.
Sophie pokes me in the side.
“Uh yeah, sure” I say quickly.
“Great, we’ll arrange in next class” he smiles getting up and tapping the top of the
chair he’s just vacated before walking off again as quick as he came.
“Well that was interesting” Sophie says to herself.
“Umm … no that was bizarre” I correct.
“Not really, everyone thought you were gay but after hearing Tucker spent the
night in our room it’s been decided that you are straight just shy” she tells me as if
this is common knowledge.
“Oh my god” I groan and start hitting my head on the table.
“What’s up?” I hear Matt say from somewhere above me but continue my head
banging.
“Jason Hunter just asked Brooke out” Sophie explains.
“Really?” he asks not sounding that surprised “Are you going?”
“No wonder she’s always covered in bruises if she does stuff like this” I hear Tucker
say besides me, I lift my head to see him watching me curiously and Matt and Sophie
quickly look down at their food.
“How do people know you spent the night in my room?” I ask ignoring his
comment.
“Uhh .. people saw me leave … don’t worry everyone knows nothing happened” he
assures me confidently.
“How?” I ask not sure I want to know the answer.
“Because I’m talking to you now and you haven’t hit me yet” he says as if it’s
obvious.
“That can change” I smile innocently at him making him chuckle softly.
“I’m glad we decided be friends”
“Where was I when we had this discussion because I don’t remember agreeing to
any such thing” I frown at him.
“When you say friends, do you mean …” Matt asks Tucker but eyes me curiously.
“No. But that’s a good idea” Tucker watches me for a second.
“What’s a good idea?” I ask worried now.
“Why don’t we do the whole friends with benefits thing?” he asks seriously.
“Because I don’t think I’d enjoy having the benefits you give me removed” I answer
back not missing a beat.
“Just friends it is then” he says not perturbed and starts eating his lunch.
 “You two are weird” Sophie sighs watching us, Matt nods in agreement.
“I’ve got to go, I got a date to arrange apparently” I stand up from the table
picking up my coffee.
“What date?” Tucker asks looking up at me from his plate. I shrug and walk away
as Sophie starts explaining the Jason situation to him.

When I walk into English a few people nod at me, I manage to hide my surprise and
smile weakly back at them, normally I manage to slip in to my classes unnoticed. I
slump down into my usual chair and gather my things from my bag, when I look back
up Jason is sliding into the chair next to me, the one that Tucker sat in last Friday.
“Long time no see” I smile shyly at him.
“Yeah … was it random me approaching you like that?” he asks with a shy smile of
his own.
“Just a bit, normally people just leave me alone”
“But you don’t mind me asking you out?” he checks, I shake my head at him.
“Great can I have your phone so I can program my number into it please?”
I pass him my phone and catch Tucker watching us.
“Was there anything in particular you wanted to do on our date?” Jason asks
mindlessly while he taps things out on my phone.
I’m unable to answer him when our conversation gets cut short by the lecture
beginning. I rip out a piece of paper from my notebook and scribble a note on it for
him to see.
No what did you have in mind?
He leans over to read it then writes his reply, we carry on our conversation on
paper.
Dinner, movie, bowling, coffee, golf?
Golf? I look up and raise an eyebrow at him, he just shrugs grinning. Dinner’s fine.
It’s date then, Tonight?.
“Mr Hunter, is there something interesting going on up there?” We both look up
when the lecturer calls Jason.
“No sir, just helping Brooke with her notes” he replies easily.
“Well Miss Daniels maybe you should consider taking one of Mr Hunter’s tutoring
sessions if you’re having problems” he raises an eyebrow at me.
“Of course” I reply sinking into my chair to avoid everyone eyes that are now on
me.
You’re a tutor? I quickly write
Yeah, extra credit, need help keeping up? He’s smirking at me now. I roll my eyes
at him and slip the paper back in my notebook to start paying attention to class.

***

“How was it? Where did you go? What’s he like? Did he kiss you?” Sophie doesn’t
even wait for me to close the door before she throws her questions at me bouncing
on her bed excitedly.
“Good, FB’s, sweet, yes” I answer all her questions stripping my jacket and
collapsing on my bed while she screams and claps her hands together. “Oh my god” I
groan and pull a pillow over my head to block her out.
“Aww come on Brooke, I’ve known you nearly three years now and I’ve never been
able to do the whole girly date run down with you before” I look up from my pillow to
catch her pouting at me.
 “Fine you can question me on the way”
She freezes at the subject change “Where are we going?”
“Wear something pretty” I wink and get up to grab my suitcase from under the
bed, she claps when she notices the dress I’ve selected.

***

We meet Matt outside the old gym where he hands us our tickets. The old building
is full and we have to push our way through to the bar. We make our way through the
crowds and Sophie guides us to the front, getting us as close to the cage as possible.
This isn’t the first fight we’ve been to so we both know that as soon as it’s over we’ve
got to make a quick exit unless we want a few bruises of our own. The lights dim as
one corner of the cage is lit up by a spotlight, illuminating the first contender. He isn’t
one I’ve seen before but he looks mean and fast. His opponent however is Matt’s
friend Jack. The fight starts quickly and is over just as quick when Jack knocks him out
in the second round. We make our quick exit, meeting back up with Matt outside.

***

“Oh god, I’m starving but I can’t stomach food yet” I grumble collecting my coffee
and handing one to Sophie.
“Tell me about it” She whispers back wincing slightly.
“What the hell happened to you two?” Matt asks when we take our seats at our
usual table.
“Shh, don’t shout” Sophie says.
“You’re hung over?” he asks us both when we wince he lowers his voice “I thought
you had a date Brooke?”
“I did, but we went out when I got back” I tell him barely above a whisper.
“Anyone told you that you both look like shit?” Tucker inf orms us cheerily as he
joins us, he put his hands up in front of him when we both glare at him “Okay, never
mind”
“Where did you go and what happened to you both?” Matt asks.
“I got tickets to watch a fight”
“Were you both in the fight?” he asks looking pointedly at the cuts on our faces.
“Umm not exactly …” I glance at Sophie wondering how we explain it but she just
busts out laughing taking me along with her.
“Ah don’t it hurts” she gasps holding her head.
Tucker clears his throat and I look up to see Matt watching us unimpressed.
“Okay, so a few guys I know gave me tickets to go watch a fight in the next town
over, after the fight we went back to the house party and things got … out of hand
and we all drank a bit much and passed out” I tell him skipping a few details.
“The cuts?” Matt prompts.
“We woke up in a bush outside the house … two hours ago” Sophie grumbles.
Tucker bursts out laughing and Matt gives Sophie the best disapproving look I have
even seen but I’m surprised when she doesn’t cower away like I would have.
“Why didn’t you invite me?” Tucker asks when his laughter is slightly under control
but not completely.
“You wouldn’t have liked it” I tell him but Sophie snorts.
“If we’re going to be doing this friends thing Brooke, you need to invite me to
things like this, you can’t leave me out” he pouts at me.
“You didn’t look like this when I left you last night” Jason notes slipping into the seat
next to me, cutting off my reply to Tucker.
“I went out after” I tell him smiling at seeing him again so soon.
“What? Didn’t enjoy your self enough with me?” he asks pretending to look
wounded.
“No I had a great time” I assure him when he puts his arm around the back of my
chair.
***

Over the next three weeks I see Jason every night and it is going good apart from
all the gossip about Tucker and I having an affair. I have no idea where the rumo urs
are coming from because I’ve hardly seen him apart from at lunch and a few times
he’s spent time in our room with Matt and Sophie.
“I heard you’re boyfriend stayed over Megan’s last night”
I look over at Cassie who’s sitting behind me. I heard the rumour as well and Jason
hasn’t turned up to any classes yet today so I haven’t had his reassurances about it.
“Good for them” I shrug, not showing how it bothers me.
“You’re going to let him get away with it?” she asks raising an eyebrow.
I open my mouth to reply but she cuts me off “Oh yeah that’s right, you’re playing
away too” she smirks.
I see Tucker out of the corner of my eye as he sits in Jason’s empty seat “What you
talking about?” He asks me looking back at Cassie.
“All the mind blowing, sweaty, wild sex that me and you have every night” I make a
point of sighing and turning to face him “We should really try and keep it a secret.” I
roll my eyes when I hear Cassie gasp.
“Want me to move?” he asks starting to stand up from the seat next to me.
“Don’t be ridiculous. I’m sure we can keep our hands off each other for a whole
hour”
“Brooke…” he shakes his head at me letting me know that he isn’t going to play my
game. Okay so maybe I get a little carried away when the rumours are brought to my
attention but considering no one has any proof of what’s supposedly happening
behind closed doors, they are all quick to believe it.
“They’re going to say it anyway as long as we are in the same room, we don’t even
have to be sat next to each other Tucker” I grumble.
“Lovers tiff?” Cassie asks and we both turn to look at her “Is it the ‘did you come’
argument?” she smirks at Tucker.
“Honey, if a guy has to ask ‘did you come?’ after sex you should be worried. First of
all because you obviously didn’t fake it good enough if you couldn’t fool him and
second of all, what the hell were you thinking getting it on with him in the first place,
he clearly doesn’t know what he’s doing”
She narrows her eyes at me and Tucker snorts but I turn my attention back to the
front of the class as the lecture starts wondering if the rumours about Jason are true
or not.
 Chapter Three

“What do you want?” Tucker groans when he finally answers his door.
“Come on. Get dressed!” I push passed him and turn the coffee machine on to
make up two cups to take with us.
“Hey Matt” I grin at him when he walks out from the bathroom in just a towel.
“Good morning” He sings back to me just as cheerful.
“Don’t talk to her she’s evil” We both turn to see Tucker pulling a pillow over his
head grumbling about death threats.
I walk over to his bed and pull the blankets off him.
“Get up!” I say in my best soldier impression.
“Why?” he moans back pathetically.
“We’re going out” I go back into the kitchen area and fill the two cups plus a
normal mug for Matt.
“I hate you.” Comes from the bed.
“Well I guess that I’ll just take Matt instead then” I wink at Matt and he grins at me
“Where are we going Brooke?” he asks playing along, of course he already knows
the plan because when I told Sophie I had the tickets she convinced me to take
Tucker.
“It was supposed to be a surprise … I’d invite both of you but I only have two
tickets and I thought with Tucker being such a fan that he would enjoy it but if he
wants to stay in bed instead of going to see Heaven’s Devil’s then I guess you can
take his place”
At the sound of Tuckers favourite band being mentioned he flies across the room
and pushes Matt out of the way to grab both my arms looking me straight in the eyes.
“Tell me now. Are you lying?”
I shake my head and gesture with my head to the table where I put the two tickets
when I came in.
“Oh my god I think I love you!” he shouts making me wince and then he kisses me.
“I take it you want to come with me?” I ask smiling.
“Definitely” He grins
“Only if you promise not to do that again”
“Are you serious? I could fuck you ten times over for this” he says seriously.
“Umm … Matt are you sure Sophie doesn’t want to come with me? It’s not too late
for her to change her mind” I ask Matt pleadingly.
“You were going to take Sophie before me?” Tucker asks looking offended.
“Of course, she’s my best friend and I didn’t even know you liked the band, she’s
the one who convinced me to take you, it took some doing by the way but she said
you would kill me if I took her and not you” I roll my eyes at how dramatic it all was.
“Damn straight I would have!”
“Tell him the rest” Matt smirks at me obviously enjoying Tuckers reaction.
“I’m not sure” I say nervously trying to get out of Tuckers grip that has just
tightened.
“What else?” he asks looking back and forth between me and Matt.
“The concert is tonight, we’re staying in a hotel and then Sophie and Matt are
joining us tomorrow” I try again to get out of his grip.
“Why? What’s happening tomorrow?” he asks narrowing his eyes at me.
“Ummm well I know the drummers fiancé and they are having a joint hen/stag
night tomorrow, I got the three of you invited with me” I close my eyes tightly when I
say it but to my surprise Tucker lets me go.
 “Tuck …” Matt frowns watching him walk around the room.
“Are you okay? Do you not want to go?” I ask him nervously.
“I’m thinking” he waves a hand dismissively at us so we both sit down at the table
and I pour myself a coffee to drink while I wait.
“I told you this was a bad idea” I tell Matt.
“He’ll be fine, just give him a minute” he assures me “Do you know what we’ll be
doing tomorrow night?”
“I’m not sure, there’s a few clubs we’ll be going to but most likely we’ll end up at a
house party to be honest. That’s what has happened when Sophie and I have gone in
the past”
“You’ve been out with them before?” Matt asks me surprised.
“Yeah I …” I’m cut off by my phone ringing.
“Hello?”
“How’d he take it?” Sophie asks excitedly.
“Umm well he’s pacing” I answer watching Tucker still silently walking around the
room.
“Have you told him where you are taking him after the concert?” she asks
laughing.
“Not yet no, I’m thinking that’s not such a good idea” I say quietly so he wont here
me.
“You have to do it; just don’t mention it until you get there. Can I speak to Matt
please?” she asks still laughing. I hand the phone over to Matt and stand up to sort
Tucker out.
“We really have to leave if you’re coming” I say stopping him with my hand on his
arm. He just nods at me and starts getting ready.
“Is he ever going to talk again?” I ask Matt once he’s hung up the phone; he just
shrugs at me smiling.

Half an hour later I finally get Tucker into my car, he still hasn’t said a word to me. I
settle in for a silent journey really wishing I had just surprised Sophie instead of telling
her so she had time to change my plans.
“Does Jason know?” he finally breaks the silence an hour later.
I look over at him and he’s looking out the window, “Does Jason know what?” I ask
frowning.
“That you’re going with me?” he turns to me expectantly.
“Umm ... no, he thinks a few of us are just going out of town for the weekend” I tell
him honestly.
“You lied to him?” he asks turning back to the window.
“No, Sophie did, I was going to tell him but she said not to, with all the rumours and
everything already, she said it would just make it worse”
“Sorry, I don’t want to put you in an awkward position”
“You’re not. He shouldn’t believe the rumours anyway, it’s not as if he doesn’t
expect me not to listen to the rumours about him. Why should it be one rule for him
and another for me?”
“What do you mean?” he asks turning back to me again.
“Some people have been saying that he’s sleeping with a few girls behind my back,
he denies it”
“I heard about that” Tucker admits sighing “Don’t think that I’m not grateful
because I am, more than you know. I just don’t want to make it harder for you
around the uni”
 “Forget about them, let’s just have a good time okay” I pat his leg to reassure him
and he seems to accept it because he grabs my hand and doesn’t let it go for the rest
of the drive.

***

If I ever doubted my decision to bring anyone but Tucker this weekend then I take
it back now. He has been the best company; he’s been enthusiastic about everything.
He walked around sightseeing with me all afternoon, we checked into the hotel –
separate rooms – and we had a lovely dinner together in a quiet pub before hitting
the show. He was energetic, laughing and cheering with the crowd, signing along and
even lifted me onto his shoulders at one point. When I took him backstage to meet
the band he was polite and funny, they all loved him. He waited while I caught up with
the girlfriends that I have known since I can remember and then even suggested an
early night but didn’t complain when I told him I had plans. We went to a pub first that
Sophie and I had been to before and we got a little drunk but then he really started to
enjoy himself when I took him to the club that Sophie and I stumbled upon
accidentally the last time we were here.
“Are you kidding me?” he asks letting his eyes take in everything around him. I
shake my head at him and watch the entertainment from the doorway before we
make our way to the bar. There are girls in nothing but tiny thongs and g-strings
dancing in various places around the club, some on the bar, a few on random tables
and one in each corner of the room up by the ceiling on a platform.
I only stay for an hour and when Tucker is looking settled, surrounded by women I
tell him I’m heading back to the hotel but that he should stay, he’s reluctant at first
but I convince him to enjoy himself. I head back happy that he’s enjoyed himself as
much as Sophie and Matt told me he would.

***

I’m woken up someone knocking on my hotel room door.

“Good morning” Sophie sings happily pushing passed me into the room.
“Morning” I rasp, I guess I lost my voice lat night.
“How was it?” she asks excitedly bouncing on my bed.
“She’s a little excited” Matt notes coming into the room.
“It went fine” I nod at her and collapse back on the bed “God, I’m knackered,
what’s the time?”
“Eleven, where’s Tucker?” she asks getting up from the bed and gathering some
clothes for me.
“I left him at the club last night. What are you doing?” I lift myself up onto one
elbow and watch as she starts flinging clothes at me.
“Get dressed; we’re taking you to breakfast”
“Fine” I drag myself into the bathroom to get dressed.
“I’ll text Tucker then if he wants to join us he can but if not he can stay sleeping”
Matt says as we head down to a pub on the beach front.
“I didn’t get in until two, I have no idea how long I’m going to last tonight” I tell
them ordering my coffee and a big breakfast.
“Well you better make sure you’re going to last because I want to have the best
night ever tonight!” Sophie says squealing a little.
“Uh … we saw Jason before we left this morning, we tried ducking him but he
caught us loading the car” Matt tells me looking sympathetic.
“I better ring him them” I sigh and walk out the back dreading the phone call.
“Hi” I say softly into the phone once he’s answer.
“Having fun?” I can’t detect his mood, he’s controlling his voice perfectly.
“Yeah, it’s been fun so far”
“So I bumped into Matt and Sophie this morning” straight to the point.
“Yeah they came down this morning, we’re heading to a hen/stag tonight”
“So it was just you and Tucker last night?”
“Yeah…”
“Did you sleep with him?”
I stare at my phone for a second.
“What? No of course not, I didn’t even go back to the hotel at the same time as
him”
“I think we need to have a talk when you get back Brooke” I can hear him sigh into
the phone and wonder if he’s going to break up with me when I get back.
“Okay” I bit my lip not sure if I should be worried or not. I do like him but he’s been
pressuring me lately and believing the rumours over me, I know this weekend
probably hasn’t helped but I should be able to go with my friends.
He hangs up on me without saying goodbye so I scroll through my messages but I
don’t have anything important that needs replying to.
“Can I have an orange juice please?” I look around the bar and watch as people
come in obviously hung over and all settle in to the tables laughing and talking about
the night before.
“What did he say?” Sophie asks sliding up next to me at the bar.
“He asked if I slept with Tucker last night”
“Again?” she sounds just as bored as I am with this whole thing.
“Yeap. He also said we need a talk when I get back tomorrow. I can just imagine all
the rumours that are going around already. It’s killing me Soph, I can’t do anything
anymore. It was so much easier when no one noticed me”
“Don’t let them get you down”
“I’ve been trying not to, but now, I just think I need a break from it all, being here
and not knowing anyone not having to hear my name being whispered when I walk
past someone it’s like heaven”
“Come on lets go join the boys, Tucker came while you were outside”
We walk back to the table just as our food is being served.
“Are you going to eat all that?” Matt asks staring at my plate overflowing with
sausages, eggs, bacon, mushrooms and beans.
“Nope” I shake my head and on cue Tucker grabs one of my sausages.
“Now I understand, what would you have done if he didn’t come?” Matt asks
“He would have, you mention food” I slap Tuckers hand away when he reaches for
my coffee “Don’t touch, get your own” I practically growl at him but he just pouts.
“What are we doing today then?” Matt asks tucking in to his own breakfast.
“I was actually going to for a walk or something if you lot think you can entertain
yourselves for a few hours?” I catch Sophie’s eye and she winks at me.
“Sure we can” she smiles to the boys.
“What did Jason say” Matt asks me grimacing.
“Nothing really, just asked if I was having fun and he wants to meet up when I get
back tomorrow” I answer looking back down at my food pushing it around no longer
hungry.
“I’m really sorry Brooke, we did try to avoid him” Matt apologises.
 “Don’t worry about it” I mutter pushing the whole plate to Tucker now “I’m not
hungry”
My phone beeps cutting off any further questions from anyone but I’m not
expecting the message.

Jason: You refuse to stay over night with me, won’t even let me touch you but yet you spend a
whole weekend with the person everyone thinks you’re having sex with behind my back.
Explanation time when you get back.

I’m sure what the correct reply would be to that. I could reply that he should trust
me but then we haven’t together any longer than a month, is that long enough to
trust someone. Well he obviously thinks so if he wants me to have sex with him. Am I
willing to trust him, if I say yes to sleeping with him he will be discovering more than
one of my secrets.
“Everything okay” I look up at Sophie and notice everyone at the table is staring at
me and I’m frowning. I smooth my features and cock my head at her.
“I pretty much trusted you from day one didn’t I?” I say aloud although it’s where
my thoughts are taking me, her Matt and even Tucker I trusted from day one.
“Yeah why?” she’s frowning now.
I shrug.
“Brooke, if this is what about I think it is then please make sure you’re ready. You
think it’s bad now. Just remember why you did it in the first place”
“I know, I guess sometimes when you don’t trust someone from day one part of
you knows that there’s a reason not to”
“Are you two going to be cryptic all day?” Tucker grumbles finishing off the
breakfast.
“Nope, I’m going for a walk now, I’ll catch up with you all later. I have my phone if
you need me” I smile and walk out of the pub looking forward to a day where I don’t
have to hide from anyone.

When I finally get to the beach after spending way too much money in town and
changing into my new bikini in the public toilets which was a struggle I settle down
onto my towel and tuck into my new book removing my tee in the hopes of catching
a tan. It’s a nice day and the beach is full of families and groups of friends, after
having a text from Sophie confirming that she will keep them away from the beach
today I feel myself relax for the first time in what feels like years. The reality is that it
has probably been years.
Two little feet in front of me catch my attention and I look up into the eyes of a
little blonde haired boy who can’t be much older than six.
“Hello” I smile at him and sit up, putting me at eye level with him “Are you okay?”
He twirls his foot in the sand for a few minutes just looking at me. “My daddy told
me to give you this” he holds his hands out with a football in between them.
“And where is your daddy?” I ask him taking the football.
I follow the direction he point to with my eyes and laugh at Dave who’s sitting there
doing an impression of sending a prayer. “Come on let’s go say hi to daddy” I shove
my things into my bag and head over there with the little boy in hand. “Shouldn’t you
be teaching him not to talk to strangers?”
“You’re not a stranger, it’s just been so long since you’ve seen him, he wants to
play but I’m knackered” he says slipping his sunglasses back on.
“It was a good show last night, I really enjoyed it, you guys just keep getting more
amazing every time I see you” Dave’s the lead singer of Heaven’s Devil’s, he’s had it
hardest of them all. He got his girlfriend pregnant when they were just sixteen and
then she died in a car accident when she was eighteen leaving Dave to look after
Dave Jr by himself, he has help off his parents when he has a show but is never away
from him overnight.
“So you wanna play huh?” I ask little Dave ruffling his hair making him duck out of
my reach and run away.
“You are my hero” Daddy Dave sighs collapsing back down on his back.
“Yeah, yeah” I mutter good naturedly dropping my bag down on his stomach “keep
an eye on that, I’ll swap you for a bit”
I still have to football in my hands so I drop kick it in the direction of Dave and
watch as he attempts to catch it, laughing when he runs away from it at the last
minute I run over to grab it but he’s quicker than me.
“No fair, you have to catch it!” I shout over to him but he just laughs at me and
runs for a chase.
I let him outrun for a little bit but when I see that he’s running out of breath I pick
up my speed and throw him over my shoulder making a run into the sea. He starts
giggling when I run further in and drop us both down so we get soaked to the head.
“We’re still dressed!” he screams laughing in my ear.
“Ooops guess I forgot” I swing him around so I’m now giving him a piggy back “Too
late now though” I yell over to him and drop us again.
When the breeze picks up a little I walk us back out to the beach and pretend to
collapse dropping us both into the sand. I’m not expecting it when a load of sand
comes down over my head sticking in my hair and on my face but while I’m
registering the first attack he throws another load onto my bikini top and stomach
then a third lot on my legs so I am completely covered in sand.
“I’d get you back but I don’t think you’re dad would be happy with me if I did” I tell
him getting up but then catching him and tickling him instead.
“Can we build sandcastles?” I can only just make out the question through the
laughing.
“Sure, have you got a bucket and spade?” I pause the tickling attack.
“Yeap it’s by daddy” he waves his hands in his dad’s direction.
“Race you there!” I call over my shoulder running away from him, but I let him win
at the last minute.
“Ahh I see he got you” Dave laughs when I finally reach them.
“I don’t know what you mean” I sniff and move some wet sand soaked hair out of
my face.
“What did you do?” he asks although his laughter is getting louder.
“I dunked us” I pout and poke my tongue out at Dave Jr.
“She did, lots of times daddy look my hair’s all wet!” he points his little finger at me
and looks so affronted it makes me giggle a little.
“I may have got a little carried away” I admit.
“You’re phones been ringing” Dave says passing me my bag.
I slip my tee back on and struggle with my shorts to put my jeans back on. “Well
looks like real life is calling me back”
“Thanks for entertaining him for a while”
“It’s not a problem I had more fun than I do with my own friends” I wink at them
both. “Don’t forget to build your sandcastles! And make sure there’s a moat too!” I
ruffle Dave Jr’s hair once more before I stand up.
“Ill see you tonight?” Dave asks gathering the buckets and spades.
“You bet” I call over my shoulder and check my phone to see where I’m meeting
Sophie and the guys for dinner, I’m surprised to find that so much time has gone by.
 “What happened to you?” Sophie bursts
into hysterics when I reach their table that is thankfully outside the restaurant, I’m
not sure I’d be allowed inside to join them otherwise.
“What? This is the new look” I poke my tongue out at her still feeling playful.
“Glad that you’re in a better mood” Matt notes while Tucker just looks vaguely
amused.
“You’re just jealous because I spent the day with a very handsome man and had
the best time in my life”
“Handsome you say?” Sophie asks sitting up with interest.
“Very” I nod
“Who was it? Anyone I know?”
“Yeap, Dave’s little boy, he’s six now and grown up so much since we last seen
him” Matt and Tucker both laugh at Sophie’s clear disappointment and no getting any
gossip.
“Where did you see him too?” She asks looking happy now.
“They were on the beach, Dave sent him over to me with a football hoping I could
keep an eye on him for an hour while, he was knackered. I dunked us in the sea a few
times and well this is what I got back for it” I point to my hair “He got the whole of
me, I’m covered in sand underneath all my clothes, it’s so uncomfortable but it was
worth it to see him laugh for a while”
“Who are Dave and Dave Junior?” Matt asks noting that Sophie and I both know
them.
“The lead singer of the band, it’s sad really. He’s the quietest of the group and got
his high school sweetheart pregnant, they were really happy even though they were
so young. She died two years later though in a car accident it was terrible. He hasn’t
really been with anyone since either, he’s dated a few women but he doesn’t really
seem interested in anyone and little Dave doesn’t really remember his mum” Sophie
fills them in while I order.
“He’s sweet, he’s like the instant big brother” I nod at them “hey, I wonder if he will
kick Jason’s ass for me when I get back” I wink only half joking.
“Why?” Sophie asks frowning.
“I got a few texts off him today, I missed his calls when I was in the sea and
obviously Dave didn’t go in my bag to answer my phone, so he’s been going a bit
crazy but after what he sent me this morning I don’t really care” I shrug.
Jason is starting to get on my nerves now, if I don’t answer my phone I’m
automatically having sex with someone else, when I’m not entirely convinced that I
believe him when he denies what he’s doing behind my back anymore, after all why
would he be so convinced I’m doing it if he’s not?
“Well if there’s any ass kicking that needs to get done you have us remember”
Matt says gesturing to himself and Tucker.
“Aww that’s really sweet guys … but I wouldn’t want any of you to get hurt” I can’t
help but laugh at how offended they both look.
“What are you wearing tonight?” Sophie asks me changing the subject.
“I bought a blue chiffon dress this morning”
“Aww Brooke, just one night!” she pleads, she doesn’t have to say anything else
because I know what she’s asking me is, to forget about the guys and wear
something that I really want to wear without having to worry about hiding my body.
“No” I say firmly and roll my eyes when she pouts and gives me puppy dog eyes.
 Chapter Four
Walking into the café I notice that Jason’s best friend is eyeing me curiously I turn
my head and approach Sophie’s table she looks up at my approach and looks
surprised.
“Why are you blushing?” she demands amused.
“Umm … I ... eh ... need your help with … something” I stammer as I sit down and
nod my greeting to Matt and a few of his friends.
“Okay, what’s going on?” she asks giving me her full attention now I have her
interest piqued.
“I need to go out tonight”
“Right ... what’s that got to do with me? You want me to come with you?” I can see
the confusion on her face and take a deep breath for what I’m about to do.
“Yeah but I wanted you to dye my hair for me”
“What, Why?” she asks whilst looking at my blonde hair and mindlessly picking up a
strand and running it through her fingers.
“JasonandIbrokeup” I rush out so it sounds like one word.
”What did he do? And what’s that got to do with you dying your hair?” she demands
“Umm well, he kind of knows now… so I want to stop the secret before he does
and I figured …” I’m cut off by her extremely loud squeal in my ear. I watch amazed
as she jumps up from her seat and starts dancing on the spot clapping excitedly.
“This is going to be the best night ever, you have no idea how long I have waited
for this” she squeaks still dancing.
“What are you talking about?” Matt asks watching Sophie looking slightly confused
but unable to hide his grin at her obvious happiness.
“I’ll tell you later, I have to go” Sophie rushes to explain and grabbing my hand at
the same time pulling me out of the café, I manage a feeble wave in the direction of
the table and blush again at the attention we are getting from all the other students.

***

“I can’t believe you’re finally doing this” Sophie exclaims squeezing my hand in the
back of the taxi. I can’t help but smirk at her, after hours of shopping, pampering,
dying my hair and then choosing the perfect outfit and getting ready I just want this
to be over. My normally pulled up into a ponytail light blonde hair is now a chocolate
brown with red highlights and pulled over my shoulder in loose messy curls giving it a
bed head look. I have finally switched the baggy clothes that hid my figure so well
that I was always known as the chubby plain girl, to a black short sleeve blouse that is
tied into a know just above my belly button, the first three buttons undone showing a
bit a cleverage and paired with a black and white plain skater skirt, setting off my
outfit are black ankle boots with a four inch heel decorated with silver studs. To use
Sophie’s words I look like a bad girl that’s waiting to find some sexy trouble I can get
into. I just hope it works.

We get out of the taxi at JD’s bar, a favourite among our fellow students that often
frequent it most nights, Luke is waiting for us outside the door, his jaw drops when he
sees me, making Sophie giggle and once again squeak about how amazing this is
going to be. Taking a deep breath we open the door and head inside. I spot Matt at
the bar with a few of his friends.
“Hey baby” Sophie shouts over the music to him, I watch holding my breath to see
what his reaction will be because even though it has been hard we have kept my
hidden figure a secret from him, I’m relived and can’t help but smile when he turns
and starts making his way over to Sophie, he stops when he sees me and simply
chuckles and shakes his head.
“I assume we will be seeing you out a lot more now then” he smirks at me as he
grabs Sophie into a hug.
“Something like that” I mutter while trying not to blush at all the appreciative looks
I am getting from the men in the bar.
“So what happened to make you want to ‘come out’ if you will?”
“I broke up with Jason and he didn’t take it so well, when he realised I wasn’t going
to sleep with him, he said and I quote ‘It’s OK to be nervous but you have nothing to
worry about, my friend told me that fat girls are the best in bed because they never
know when they are going to get it again’” I smirk at him.
“What did you say to that?” he asks and when Sophie snorts he turns back to me
looking very amused much to my amazement.
“Well I had avoiding him all week since we got back and he was waiting for me
when I got out the shower and hit me with that bombshell so I did what anyone in my
position would do … I dropped my robe and got dressed in front of him then left the
dorm with him shouting apologies at me” I shrug and he bursts out laughing, full on
bent over hands on knees laughing, after several attempts of us all trying to get him
to stop laughing I shake my head and head over to the bar where I am immediately
approached by a tall medium built man who looks a few years older than me about
twenty six I would guess.
“Hey”
“Hi” I smile back at him
“I don’t think I have seen you here before have I, are you new to the area?” he
asks while trying to keep his eyes on mine but failing several times.
“No, it’s my first time here, but I go to uni here”
“Well I can understand your boyfriend keeping you inside all to himself, I’m
assuming you have one…”
“Not as of a few hours ago” I shrug and pay for my drink.
I’m not all that surprised when Luke comes up to me and slings an arm around my
shoulders, I pretty much worked out that the guy I’m talking to is only interested in
getting me into his bed.
“I wondered where you got to” Luke greets me pulling me into his side.
“Needed a drink” I lift my glass to him and turn to guy still staring at me and catch
him looking down my shirt, “This is Luke, my friend” I introduce him then realise I
don’t even know his name.
“No I know, How you been Luke, how’s Kate?”
“She’s good, she will be here later”
“Okay, well I’ll catch up to you later” he says to me as he makes his way over to a
table full of men, none of who I can see because they are all facing away from me, I
turn my attention back to Luke and smirk at him.
“Nice, very smooth by the way” I nudge his shoulder with my own.
“Just looking out for you, that’s Adam Jenks, stay away from him. He will try his
hardest to get you into his bed and that’s all he’s interested in” he warms me looking
very stern and fatherly making me chuckle.
“I kind of figured that out before you got here, I might be a virgin but I’m not
clueless”
“Hey, don’t say the V word around here Brooke, these guys will have a field day
with that” he growls at me.
“Okay, Okay. Let’s go find Sophie. Lead the way my knight in shining armour” I
follow him through the crowded bar to find Sophie near the back talking to Matt and
man I don’t recognise.
“Hey, you having fun?” Sophie asks, pulling me in for a quick hug.
“I was until Luke spoilt it for me” I complain adding a pout for good measure
making Luke sigh and roll his eyes.
“What do you mean?”
“She was talking to Adam at the bar” Luke says as if that’s the only explanation he
needs to give, which apparently it is.
“Oh no Brooke, stay away from him, he’s a player” Matt warns but Sophie just rolls
her eyes like I did.
“I know, you lot do realise I’m not stupid, besides I was having fun, if he thinks he
can charm me into his bed then I’m not going to stop him trying I have a feeling it
would be fun to wind him up”
“What happened to the quiet shy girl we all know and love?” Matt asks looking far
too serious.
“Don’t worry, this one is way more fun” Sophie reassures him “It’s entertaining to
watch” she grins at me making me remember a night out we went on during our first
month of meeting.
“Are you looking for a job?” The man that I didn’t recognise earlier asks me, it’s
now that I notice he’s wearing a JD’s Bar T-shirt, he’s looking over me taking in my
outfit and body in one swift look but he is doing it assessing.
“Umm no, why?”
“A girl like you could fit in well here and by the sounds of it you can handle the men
so think about it and get back to me, my names Jeff by the way” he says to me and
then turns to Sophie “When will Haley be back?” he asks looking worried.
“Tomorrow, I promise” she assures him.
“And what I am supposed to do tonight?” he asks her, Sophie grins at him and
points to me.
“Brooke” she informs him in a way that makes me worry what she is promising
him.
“I need someone who knows what they are doing, not someone who is going to
mess about Soph” he tells her while assessing me again.
“Trust me”
“OK, what are you talking about?” I ask shifting uncomfortable from foot to foot
under their combined stares.
“We need you to fill in for our dancer, she’s ill” Jeff smiles at me.
“Come on Brooke, what better way to say ‘fuck you’ to everyone than this?” she
asks, my attention is drawn to the door when I hear a familiar voice, Jason strolls in
with his arm over Cassie from my English class.
“OK, I’ll do it” I nod at Jeff
“Great because your up what songs do you want?” he points to a curtained off area
behind us.
“Umm Shakin hands by Nickleback first of all and then Pour some sugar on me by
Def Leopard as the second one, I’m only doing two and I need Sophie for the second
one.”
Jeff seems pleased with my answer and heads off to the DJ while I make my way
behind the curtain, I’m stood on a small stage with a pole in the middle of it, I’m just
thinking that I might just kill Sophie when she pops her head in the curtain.
“Why didn’t you tell me I had to dance around a pole?” I demand with my hands on
my hips
“Don’t worry, you’ll be fine, remember the last time, just do that again” she insists
with a small smile that makes me think she’s up to something.
“Fine but I need you for the second one, just like last time”
“No problem, Matt will love it” she smirks at me and then disappears again.

I take my position as sitting in front of the pole with my legs straight out in front of
me and slightly thank the lord that I put a pair of shorts on under my skirt before I left
the dorm earlier. I keep my head down as the first few notes of the song drift through
me and the curtain opens, keeping my head down I bring my feet up so my knees are
bend in front of my and lift my legs up in the air hooking my feet around the pole,
using my hands I spin myself around, bring my legs down one at a time slowly and
then standing wrap my leg around the pole and then alternate between doing spins,
holding myself up and dancing around the pole, I keep my head down the whole time
and can only barely hear the music over the cheers in the bar, soon enough the
songs fades out and Sophie makes her way on to the stage. Taking her position on
the lower part of the pole we both alternate between dancing around each other and
the pole during the second song, the cheers get louder every time me and Sophie
come into contact with each other, so far I have kept my face hidden from the crowd
and only through Sophie’s occasional giggles can I assume that they are enjoying the
entertainment we are providing. “Jason’s watching, I don’t think he’s figured it out
yet” she says loud enough for only me to hear I shrug and do one final twist down the
pole as the song comes to an end.

Grabbing my hand Sophie and I stand at the front of the stage, when I lift my head
to look at the crowd I am rewarded by a few dropped jaw expressions from people
who know me and can’t quite believe what they are seeing. Looking down, Luke is
stood with his arms wrapped around Kate, they are both laughing at Adam stood next
to them who just keeps blinking at me.
Matt and Jeff take a few steps forward both sporting shocked and impressed
expressions as they help us down from the stage.
“Sophie, I can’t believe you have kept this from me, why have you kept her
hidden?” Jeff demands looking at me as if I might disappear any minute. Sophie just
laughs at him and pats his chest.
“She’s better than our actual dancer” he says to her disbelievingly, he turns to me
looking suddenly serious “The job is yours” he states and start taking some money
out of his pocket.
“Whoa” I hold my hands up in front of myself to stop him “I don’t want a job, and I
definitely don’t want any money for what I just did”
“Why the hell not? You do realise that every guy in this bar is going to want to buy
you a drink, do you know how much you have just increased my sales by?” he asks
looking as though he can’t believe what he’s saying.
I shrug at him helplessly “I don’t want to get paid for it, I only did it for fun, and I
won’t be accepting drinks off anyone so if someone does buy me a drink, just pour
me water”
“Hmmm smart too huh” he appraises me.
“I can’t believe this is the same girl who has kept her head down for two whole
years, hardly spoken a word to anyone, is only ever seen wearing clothes ten sizes
too big for her and never goes out, and you knew this whole time and no one ever
suspected a thing” Matt laughs through his words to Sophie.
“This is the real Brooke” Sophie says simply as Adam approaches up and wraps an
arm around me, I smile up at him.
“You look a little tense, I can help out with that” he says seductively to me
“How do you plan on doing that?” I ask shyly
 “Sex”
“Hmm would it be good?” I ask biting my lip
“It would be amazing, I could make you forget everything, even your own name”
he assures me watching my lip.
I let out a little moan “Could you make me scream?”
“I can guarantee to make you scream and worship gods you didn’t even know you
knew” he says quietly running his hand through my hair
“Would I be satisfied after it?” I ask looking up at him through my lashes
“Baby I can make sure you only have enough energy to sleep after it”
“Would it last long enough for you to take your time?”
“I will go all night”
I let out another small moan and slowly drag my teeth along my bottom lip but
then I shrug “You know actually I think I just need a drink” I smile sweetly at him.
His mouth opens and closes a few time, letting me know he is a loss for words and I
can hear Luke, Kate, Jeff, Matt and Sophie laughing as he walks away. I wink at them
and let out a small laugh.
“Told you that the real Brooke is more entertaining” Sophie boasts to Matt who is
looking at me as if I have grown two heads.
“I knew it would be fun to wind him up” sigh happily.
“We are going to have the best year ever!” Sophie exclaims.
“You’ve been holding out on me!” Tucker complains, joining us, handing me a drink
and closely followed by a few of his friends. I look at the glass in my hand and back
up at him. “I bought it” he assures me; I look over to Matt who nods his head at me
and start drinking it. “So what was with the disguise?” he asks keeping eye contact I
notice.
“Seriously? A twenty year old v-“
“Shy girl” Luke cuts me off sending me a glare
“Right ... a twenty year old shy girl who happens to have extra curves in all the
right places surrounded by a hell of a lot of horny guys”
“You mean you’re ....” Matt asks looking surprised enough for me to be offended.
“Uhh …. Yeah, and no plans to change that in the immediate future”
“I guess I can see what you mean” Tucker agrees, I’m not sure if he caught my slip
up or not but before I have time to dwell on it one of his friends steps forward and
pulls me into a hug.
“I’m Brad” he says as if wrapping his arms around someone before he tells them
his name is normal.
“Brooke” I reply when he lets me go and takes a step back.
“Hmmm … can I have your number?” he asks me seriously.
“It’s really nothing personal it’s just that your ... you know, male” I sigh as I watch
him consider my words.
“Oh, you mean you …”
“I like girls” I confirm.
He watches me suspiciously, and shakes his head to let me know he doesn’t
believe me. I turn to Sophie and raise an eyebrow at her.
“You know you probably don’t want to stay in the dorm tonight after all this, don’t
you” she mutters to me gesturing to Matt with her head I smile sweetly at her as if I
have no idea what she’s talking about and pull her head towards mine and lean in for
the kiss, before I have time to pull away her tongue is sliding against mine, she lets
out a little moan and then I hear Matt groan behind me and catch on straight away
and play it up a bit, when we break apart after another minute I notice all the guys
are visibly swallowing and clearing their throats.
 “Guess I need to find a room to spend the night in” defeated I quickly run through
my options in my head.
“You can stay in my room tonight, my roommates gone home for a few days” Brad
offers.
“That won’t be necessary, Brookes coming home for the night”
If Sophie wasn’t sending him open glares that promise death I never would have
believed that my step dad had just approached us.
“What are you doing here?” trying to keep my voice strong as I smile up at him.
“Your mom got worried when you didn’t visit last weekend, asked me to come and
see you were okay”
“Oh” is all I can reply not sure what he expects me to say really.
“I’ll just go get us a drink”
“Umm … actually I have one”
“I insist” he says tightly, his gaze clearly daring me to challenge him.
“You’re not actually going to drink anything he gives you, right?” Sophie whispers in
my ear as we watch him make his way through the crowds to the bar.
“What do you suppose I do? You know he’s going to be watching me like a hawk to
make sure I drink it”
“He creeps me out”
“How am I going to get out of this?” I ask, keeping an eye on the bar and downing
the drink Tucker bought me.
“Matt, is your room empty tonight?” Sophie calls to him.
“Uhh ... yeah” he calls back turning from his conversation from Luke.
“All we have to do is figure out how to get you out of here now”
“Give me an hour so he doesn’t suspect anything and then distract him so I can
leave without him following me”
“If you’re sure” she asks dubiously.
I only nod to her as my step dad returns to us handing me a drink.
“Thanks”
“I believe you owe me a dance” Tucker interrupts us.
“We’re having a drink” Sam informs him not bothering to hide his irritation.
“You never mention a boyfriend” he accuses me.
“We’re just friends” I smile up at him to distract him from glaring at Tucker.
“Well?” Tucker asks watching us
“Sure” I reply then down my drink in three swallows trying not to think about
whatever he put in it, then putting the glass down I take his hand and we head into
the crowd of already dancing people.
“Who’s the guy?” Tucker asks as he puts my hands behind his neck and his own
rest on my hips.
“That’s Sam, my step dad”
“Seems like a happy bloke” he notes
“Yeah, he’s just a big barrel of laughs”
“So it took you longer than I thought it would to stop hiding behind those awful
clothes” he smirks down at me taking me surprise I must admit.
“You knew?” I ask trying and failing to keep the surprise from my voice.
“Please, give me some credit” he rolls his eyes at me.
“What gave me away?”
“Well for starters, your neck is small, your wrists are tiny, and not forgetting that
first time I sat next to you in English and poked you in the side, imagine my surprise
when my finger went about three inches into your top before I actually came into
contact with your side. Add that to the fact that I’ve seen you wear a seatbelt. Oh and
I saw you in your bikini on the beach last weekend while you were running around
chasing after a little boy.”
“Guess I didn’t realise that you would catch on” I mutter as I remember all the
times that I have given myself away, as we have become friends, I seem to be doing
the unconscious things that I do around Sophie.
“So what happened?”
“I broke up with Jason when he told me fat girls are amazing in bed, I kind of lost it
and stripped in front of him”
“Bet he loved that” he nods at me as if the situation was completely normal, for
him it probably is.
“Well yeah until I walked out on him”
“So no more Jason?” he asks
“Nope” I shake my head to confirm it
“Wrong here he comes” I look to where he is gesturing with his head and sure
enough a drunk Jason is stumbling towards us.
“So this is why would didn’t sleep with me, you was sleeping with Tucker the whole
time after all”
“Let the real rumours really begin” I mutter trying my best to ignore him Tucker
just nods, smiling.
“Well it’s only fair that you should know I had a threesome last night” he says
proudly, watching for my reaction to his news of cheating on me.
“OK, let me guess, it was your penis, your hand and your imagination… yeap that
sounds about right”
“You know, you were so much more attractive when I thought you were fat” he
sneers ignoring my comment.
I don’t bother replying as I notice that slowly my body is starting to shut down, well
that’s what it feels like at least, my movements are becoming sloppy, my vision is
swaying giving me the impression that I’m not standing I’m hovering slightly, I
stumble a little and Tuckers arms tighten around me. I look up at him and try to
figure out which one is the real him out of the two in front of my eyes.
“You okay?” he asks but it sounds like it’s coming from further away than I know he
is.
“I should have known you were a whore” I hear Jason snap at me.
“Right that’s it I’ve..”Tucker starts to say but he is cut off by Sophie, when did she
get here? I look around at them slightly confused.
“She’s not a whore darling, whores get paid, Brooke gives it for free ... Well not to
you” she informs him as she grabs my arm and pulls me away from the dance floor.
“Sam’s in the bathroom, if you want to go you have to go now” Sophie tells me,
frowning down at me when I make no reply “there’s a taxi out the back for you”
“Where am I going?” I ask but I’m not sure it comes out properly because Sophie
just looks confused and worried. I can feel my eyes closing as my eyelids student feel
too heavy, my legs give out but there’s something stopping me from falling, I look
down amazed and there’s an arm around me. There are some fuzzy voices floating
around me as I’m pulled through a door and put into the back of a car. Fighting to
stay awake is too hard now so I give up and succumb to the sleep that’s calling me.

***

“Brooke”
I fling my hands in the air to make the noise stop.
 I’m actually enjoying sleep for once and I don’t want it to end. My eyes fly open
when I come in contact with skin. My hand is splattered over Tucker face covering his
mouth and nose.
“What do you want?” I grumble pulling my hand away.
“How are you feeling?” he asks amused.
“I was fine until you woke me up” I snap but take in my surroundings “Where am
I?”
“In Matt’s dorm” he frowns at me.
“And what am I doing in Matt’s dorm with you?”
“Brooke how much of last night do you remember?”
I sort through the memories from the night before but come up empty “Last thing I
remember is dancing with you”
I look away from his eyes because now they are concerned and narrowed. I’m in
what I assume is Matt’s bed in just my underwear, then I notice Tucker is only
wearing a pair of boxers.
“I slept in the other bed” he assures me when I look up at him. “I wanted to make
sure you were okay before I left, I have some stuff I need to do this morning”
“Oh … yeah … I’m fine” I frown and flop back down on the bed.

When I make my way back into my room both Sophie and Matt are sat at our table.
“How are you feeling?” Sophie asks pouring me a coffee.
“Like I have the worse hangover ever” I mutter.
“I can’t believe you drank that drink” she scolds me.
I shrug “It would have been worse if I didn’t. Besides I got home okay didn’t I”
“Yeah but …” she looks between me and Matt “What’s going on with you and
Tucker?”
“Nothing” I frown “We’re just friends”
This time Sophie and Matt exchange a worried look.
“What?” I sigh.
“Tucker doesn’t … have female friends Brooke” Matt says this carefully.
Sophie frowns at me “You’re not sleeping with him are you?”
“No!” I all but shout “Honestly. We are just friends. I have to put up with these
rumors at school, don’t tell me I have to put up with them at home to?”
“No … just be careful”
I nod a them both and climb back into bed. I’m not going to any classes today.
 Chapter Five
I knock on Tuckers dorm and wait nervously for him to answer hoping he hasn’t got
company.
The door swings open and his room mate stares at me, when he takes in my
overnight bag he steps aside to let me in.
“One of yours Tuck” he says and then closes the door behind me.
“Hey” Tucker greets from where he’s sat on his bed. I walk across the room into
the kitchenette area looking for coffee; I sigh when I see nothing but jars of instant
coffee and pull my coffee machine out of my bag.
“Can I crash here tonight please? Sophie’s sister is staying over and she’s kicked
me out of the room” I ask as I set up the machine.
“Only if you promise to make me lots of that” he says watching the machine
hypnotised.
I chuckle at him because now I understand why people think my reaction to coffee
is bad, if my expression is anything like his is now.
“I promise” I roll my eyes at him.
“I’m Ethan by the way” Tuckers room mate introduces himself.
“I’m Brooke” I smile back.
“Nice to meet you Brooke, tell me something are you loud?” he asks throwing
Tucker a look.
“Excuse me?” I ask not having a clue what’s going on.
“She’s not, we’re not, and we don’t. We’re friends. It’s not like that” Tucker says to
him.
Ethan turns his attention back to me and looks at me curiously. I watch as he rakes
his eyes over me and then turns back to Tucker “Whatever dude, just keep it down, I
have a test tomorrow”
“Honestly, we’re just friends. We don’t have sex, we don’t even mess around even
a little bit” Tucker tells him proudly.
“Uh huh, and where is she going to sleep” Ethan asks raising an eyebrow at him.
“In my bed” Tuckers supplies.
“With you?”
“Of course”
“I am not sleeping in that bed with you” I interrupt their conversation.
“It’s fine, I completely understand” Tucker turns to me looking sympathetic.
“You do?” I ask cautiously.
“Of course, it’s natural” he says still sympathetic but I notice something else I can’t
quite place in his eyes and fold my arms across my chest.
“And what is it that you understand?” I ask trying and failing to keep the sarcasm
out of my voice.
“You’re worried that as soon as we get in there and you lie next to me, you’re
going to jump me and you don’t want everyone in the building to know what a sex
god I am because you’ll be screaming my name so much” he explains.
“Shit, we can’t sleep in that bed now” I say looking disappointed.
“Why not?” he asks and frowns down at the bed.
“Because your imagination just jumped in it and now there’s no room for us in
there” I smile sweetly at him.
“Okay I like her” Ethan announces from his own bed laughing.
“She’s not even that nice” Tucker sniffs.
“Come on, bed. I’m tired. Coffee will be ready to pour when you get up” I instruct.
 I go into the bathroom and change into a tank top and boxer type briefs, when I
walk back into the room I see Tucker slipping into bed in just a pair of boxers.
“Oh no. Put a top on” I point at him accusingly.
“Why, afraid you won’t be able to resist me?” he smirks at me taking in my tank
and briefs.
“Fine” I smile sweetly at him and pull my top off so I’m just in my bra and panties
now.
“Point taken” he mutters and sits up to put a t-shirt on as I return my tank.
“You two are so weird” Ethan complains from his bed across the room.
I shake my head and climb into bed next to Tucker trying not to touch him. Now if
you’ve ever slept in a single bed with a six foot, built like a quarter back twenty two
year old man, then you understand how hard it is. If not imagine trying to fit a
hundred and twenty five pieces into a hundred piece puzzle.
“Christ your huge” I mutter.
I blush when I realise what I’ve said and Tucker bursts out laughing.
“This is so wrong” I hear Ethan grumble from across the room.
“That’s not what I meant and you know it” I snap at Tucker embarrassed and
elbow him.
“I didn’t say anything” he laughs at me.
Grumbling threats to torture Sophie in the morning I turn my back to him and press
up against the wall as much as I can.

I wake up warm and relaxed after a peaceful nights sleep. Until I hear Ethan
speaking, he’s obviously stood over the bed judging from how close his voice is.
“I’m sorry but … Are you two spooning?”
I feel Tucker shift behind me. “We’ll we sure as shit aint forking” he grumbles
sleepily.
It’s then I notice that I’m warm because I’m wrapped up in Tucker. His one leg is
thrown over both of mine, trapping me in, his arm is lazily wrapped around my
stomach and side and I look down to confirm because I can’t quite believe it but
yeap, he has a hand under my top cupping my right breast. I try to remove it with my
own hand but he resists and he’s stronger than me.
“Hand” I prompt him.
“Hmmm” he replies sleepily but squeezes slightly.
I turn my head to see Tucker still has his eyes closed and Ethan is watching at us
amused.
“A little help, please?” I ask gesturing to Tucker with my head. He grins then leans
down and twists Tuckers ear.
I watch as Tucker jumps up with a yelp and grabs his ear.
“Thanks” I grin at Ethan and getting out of bed head straight into the kitchen area.
“What was that for?” Tucker demands rubbing his ear.
“You were groping me, he was protecting me” I say handing both of them a mug of
coffee.
“I was not groping you” Tucker grumbles sniffing his coffee.
“You were, I even tried to remove your hand myself but you put up a fight” I tell
him taking in the scent of my own coffee and smiling.
“I can’t help it if my hand has a mind of his own when I’m sleeping but I forgive you
because you gave me coffee” he says sounding sympathetic instead of sorry.
“Right I have to go I have a test in half hour” Ethan announces draining his cup.
“Me too, hang on a sec I’ll come down with you” Tucker replies stretching and
shuffling into the bathroom. I have three more cups and a long shower before I leave
their room with a sticky note attached to the coffee machine with instructions on how
to use it for them.

“So which one did you have sex with?” A voice asks from behind me. I turn my
attention away from the selection of fruit in front of me and look up to see Beth
watching me. She’s never liked me but since Tucker and I became friends, she seems
to go out of her way to be a bitch to me.
“Excuse me?” I frown at her.
“You spent the night in Tuckers room but Ethan was there as well. So which one did
you sleep with? They both deny having sex with you” she says impatiently.
“I didn’t have sex with any of them” I protest.
“Right … Well if it was Ethan it’s only because Tucker didn’t want you and if it’s
Tucker then don’t expect a repeat performance because he doesn’t do them. Unless
you did both of them, they haven’t been known to do that before, but I wouldn’t put it
past Tucker.”
“Why are you still talking?” I ask not liking what she is accusing me of one bit.
With a look I’m sure would make wild animals cower sent my way she walks off and
joins a table full of her friends.
“Have I mentioned lately how much I hate you?” I grumble to Sophie as I join her,
Matt, Tucker and Luke at the table.
“What’s wrong?” she asks turning from her conversation with Matt.
“I just got asked if I had a threesome with Ethan and Tucker last night” I tell her
eating my banana.
She laughs. Doesn’t apologise, doesn’t look sympathetic just laughs making
everyone at the table stop talking to watch us “Glad you find my apparent sexual
activities entertaining”
“What’s so funny?” Matt asks.
“Sorry I didn’t think Ethan would be there he usually stays out” Sophie says
ignoring the question. “Wait, so where did you sleep?” she asks me and I watch as
everyone stares at me waiting for my answer.
“In Tuckers bed” I say quietly.
“Then where did you sleep?” Matt asks him.
“In my bed” He says as if it should be obvious.
“You slept in the same bed?” Matt asks dumbly
“Yes” I snap
“And you didn’t have sex?” he clarifies
“Nope but she did mention something about me being huge” he grins and winks at
me. I throw my banana peel at him.
“Not funny. People think we had a threesome with Ethan” I tell him.
“No, I can’t see you doing that” he says sweeping his eyes over me.
Two guys walk past our table and grin at me “Hey Brooke” they greet me with a
wink.
“But they can” Tucker laughs at me.
“You do realise that the students here all have very colourful imaginations so I’m
just wondering if they are picturing it with you behind Ethan ... Or with Ethan behind
you” I smile widely as his face drops and he looks a little sick. “Not so funny now huh”
I say picking up my sandwich.
“How can you just carry on as if it’s normal?” he asks watching me take a bite.
“All this sex I’m supposed to be having is making me hungry” I shrug at him.
“So no one had sex in that room last night?” Matt asks still surprised.
 “Umm ... No first of all I would not have sex with an audience, second of all I would
not be an audience to someone else having sex” I state firmly.
“Besides she wouldn’t be able to walk properly if she had sex with me” Tucker
winks at me and hi-fives Matt.
“I really do worry about all the women you sleep with” I sigh.
“Why? I always wear a condom” he replies offended.
“That may be the case but do you wear it properly?” I ask now that I have his full
attention.
“What do you mean?”
“It just concerns me that perhaps you’re not covering the right dick, do you put it
on the one between your legs ... or the one on top of your head?” I tilt my head to the
side as if considering him.
“Speaking of imaginative body parts that reminds me … I’m missing some socks
did you take them?” he asks smirking
“What the hell would I do with your socks?” I ask frowning.
“Trying to compensate for something maybe?” he asks staring pointedly at my
chest.
“You tell me considering I woke up with your hand wrapped around one” I raise an
eyebrow.
“You’re right, their very real” he sighs.
“You two should just have sex and get it over with” Sophie laughs putting a stop to
our insults.
“She not my type” Tucker announces.
“You’re type is anything that can breathe on it’s own” Matt snorts
“No, she’s not nice enough” he sniffs
“I’m nice, just not to you” I admit
“You know it wouldn’t hurt for you to show me a bit of respect now and again” he
turns to me.
“How so?” I ask knowing something ridiculous is coming.
“You could refer to me as god and the odd curtsey wouldn’t go a miss either” he
nods as if the decision is made.
“Hmmm…” I sigh looking up at the ceiling.
“What?” he follows the direction of my eyes with his own.
“I’m just wondering whether, after I have killed you, should roast or fry your body
parts before I feed them to the dogs”
“See what I mean” he demands pointing at me “Can’t you just be normal for two
minutes?” he asks
“Fine, but if it takes too much effort, I’m out” I shrug.
Sophie and Matt watch us bemused so I ignore them and pick up my coffee. “Are
you walking me to class or what?” I smile sweetly at Tucker.
“Yeah, let’s go” he stands and pulls me into him with an arm around my neck.
“So I have tickets for a fight tonight” I nudge his shoulder with my own as we take
our seats in English.
“Explain this whole fight thing. I don’t get it” he asks while twirling a pen between
his thumb and forefinger.
“I don’t know exactly” I shrug “Sophie and I, we usually just go for the party
afterwards. Remember when we went to see Heavens Devil’s? Well I’m close with
Dave – He’s the one with the little boy that I was on the beach with and he normally
gets them for me. Basically, the fights are held at an old abandoned gym and there’s
a bar, it’s a cage fight I think. You can bet on them as far as I know but we just go for
the house party afterwards with the band. You interested?”
“Yeah” he shrugs “Should be fun”
 Chapter Six

“I’m so sorry Soph” I say for what feels like the hundredth time that day.
“It’s okay, I’m fine don’t worry about it” she assures me grabbing herself another
coffee.
I know I kept her up most of the night with my tossing and turning, the nightmares
were bad last night.
“I know but I feel really bad, you’re loosing out on sleep and we have exams
coming up. I’ll go to the doctor and get some sleeping pills or something”
“No, it’s fine. Its only last night that I lost sleep. Don’t go on sleeping pills just for
one night out of a week” She tells me over her shoulder as we head to our usual
lunch table that Tucker is already seated at.
“You two look like crap” he grins at us both as we take our seats.
“My fault” I wince as I acknowledge the restless night’s effect on us both. “I kept
Soph up most of the night”
“That’s because I wasn’t there” he jokes but I look down, this is something I had
already picked up on, it isn’t lost on me that the only night of the week Tucker didn’t
stay in our room or I didn’t stay in his is the night I had nightmares.
Sophie hearing this theory and obviously catching on whips her head up and frowns
at him then turns to me “Oh my god” she whispers looking back at Tucker.
“What?” he frowns at her.
“Nothing” she says frowning herself.
“Anyway what are we doing tonight?” I ask changing the subject as Matt joins us
taking his seat next to Sophie and immediately getting into a discussion with Tucker
about some party they went to last night.
“You knew the nightmares stop when Tucker stays with you didn’t you” Sophie
accuses me quietly enough so the boys can’t hear her. I shrug at her avoiding her
eyes. “Why didn’t you say anything?” I shrug again “Because I can’t explain it”.
“I think I can” she says and I snap my eyes to hers “You have feelings for him, it
makes sense you spend so much time together, you’ve practically spent every night
together since you stayed in his room last week. It was going to happen sooner or
later. You need to stop spending so much time with him. I won’t watch you get hurt
like all the others”
“I don’t have feelings for him, I care about him as a friend that’s all Soph” I
promise her flicking my gaze to Tucker.
“I don’t care, he means too much to you already. He will let you down, everyone is
already surprised your friendship has lasted this long and they think it’s only because
you are sleeping with him regularly. He’s going to let you down and you’ll be broken, I
won’t be able to fix that. I don’t want him staying in our room any more”
I frown at her “In case you haven’t notice Soph I’m already broken. I’m not asking
you to fix me, I can fix myself”
“That’s what you call it? You spend every night with Tucker yet every weekend
you’re with a different guy”
“Excuse me?” I say a bit too loud for our hushed conversation.
“All I’m saying is people are starting to think you’re a whore Brooke” she says still
only loud enough for me to hear, ignoring the fact that guys have stopped talking to
watch us.
“And you?” I ask not believing that she could think such a thing about me knowing
that nothing ever happens between Tucker and I or any other person the most I do is
flirt a little. She shrugs in answer to my question. I stare at her opened mouthed for a
second.
 “Is everything okay?” Matt asks from beside us.
“Everything’s fine” I say standing up not looking away from Sophie’s accusing eyes
“Looks like I have a reputation to live up to” I walk away from the table before the
tears have a chance to fall. I walk a bit faster when I hear Tucker call after me.
I skip the rest of my classes that day and head to my mums. I know I’m not
welcome there and will probably have to pay in some way for turning up uninvited. I
don’t care, maybe I should be punished.

Checking through my phone when I’m sat in my car outside the dorm, I skip the
messages from Sophie and Tucker but read the message from Katie inviting me to
party in her apartment. Starting my car again I head over there while quickly tapping
out a message to let her know I’m on my way over.

Luke lets me in and I watch as he takes in my appearance. From my knee high

black boots, skinny jeans, grey tee with ‘FUCK IT’ printed across my chest, the brown
leather jacket to the bright red cut on my lip then finally my hair pulled up into a
messy high ponytail. “Shots” he says simply grabbing my hand and leading me into
the packed kitchen.
“You know this bad girl look you’re sporting tonight is sexy as hell right?” I turn at
look at guy stood staring down at me.
“Brooke” I smile up at him, the alcohol has definitely taken effect now and my
teeth have gone numb, I just hope I’m not at the slurring stage.
“Harry, Are you a friend of Kate’s?”
“Luke’s” I shake my head at him, he’s very good looking in a good boy way. He’s
wearing black converse and jeans, a dark blue button down shirt with a black tee
underneath, his eyes are a mixture of green and blue and his short hair is black,
styled into spikes. He grins when he notices me giving him the once over.
“Not so bad yourself” I smirk and shrug at him not embarrassed to be caught
looking at him.
“So how’d you get the cut on your lip?” he asks leaning his hip on the counter next
to us.
“Very long, very boring story” I tell him touching my lip and sighing when it doesn’t
sting.
“I have a feeling nothing about you is boring” he smirks at me.
“Well excitement does seem to follow me around” I note when I catch sight of
Sophie, Matt and Tucker walking through the front door.
“Friends of yours?” he asks turning to follow my gaze.
“Yeah” I shrug and pick up a bottle of beer.
“Available?” he asks changing the subject.
“Yeah, you?”
He nods his head in answer and I smile at him “Interesting”
“Could be” he replies making me raise an eyebrow.
“Number?” his short questions making me grin.
“Phone?” I ask holding my hand out for him making him grin wider as he hands me
his phone. I tap my number into it and hand it back. “Done”
“What are you studying then?” he asks back to using more than one or two words.
“Business management” I wince knowing how much hard work it is. “Only a few
months left though thankfully”
“I don’t envy you, trust me” he pours two more shots and hands me one.
“What about you?” I ask taking the shot
“Do you have any plans for the rest of the weekend?” he asks not answering my
question.
“It’s my birthday tomorrow, not sure what I’m doing for it” I answer honestly, I
never celebrate my birthday.
“I’m sure I could think of something to give you” he grins at me taking a step closer
so we are almost touching.
“Is that so?” I mummer tilting my head up to look at him, even with my heels he’s
still a good four inches taller than me.
“Mmm hmmm” he whispers leaning down.
“Broke” we jump away from each other at the interruption and I turn to glare at
Sophie.
“Yes?” I ask with a bored expression.
She frowns at me “What happened to your lip?”
I shrug “Seems as though you’re not the only one who thinks I’m a whore” I tell her
and walk out the room ignoring the questioning look Harry sends me but knowing that
he will still be calling me tomorrow. “Brooke” she calls after me but I ignore it and
head out to find Luke.
Unfortunately I find him talking to Matt and Tucker on the balcony, I spin around
when I see them and start heading somewhere else but Luke calls me over.
“Having fun?” he asks throwing an arm around me.
“I was” I grumble and look towards the room I just left where I can see Sophie and
Harry now in conversation. The fresh air seems to amplify the alcohol levels in me
and I sway slightly.
“Missed you in class, where did you go?” Tucker asks me but I feel my phone
vibrate in my pocket.

Unknown: I try to kiss you and you disappear on me? Told you that you
weren’t boring.

I laugh at the text I know is from Harry. I look up at Tucker and Matt for the first
time since joining them. I roll my eyes as I watch them both frown at the same time
as they notice my lip but before they can comment Sophie joins us with Harry
following her.
“I need a drink” I tell Luke moving out from under his arm but stumbling slightly.
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Matt asks watching me.
“Sure, according to your girlfriend I don’t need to drink to do anything stupid. I
manage just fine when I’m sober, so why not?” I smile sweetly at him and walk away
before Sophie reaches us pulling Harry along with me.
“I take it you two have fallen out” He notes turning to look at my friends as I pull
him back into the apartment.
“You would be right” I agree.
I pull him into the bedroom with me and laugh at his surprised expression when I
close the door behind us.
“Don’t worry I’m not going to attack you, just wait here two minutes” I call over my
shoulder as I head into the bathroom, I lock the door just in case, I might be drunk
but I’m not stupid and wouldn’t leave myself in a lockable room with a guy I just met.
Once I have finished in the bathroom I go back into the bedroom but Harry is not
where I left him, instead Tucker is stood by the bed with his arms folded across his
chest looking a little angry.
“Not you too” I complain a little shocked that Tucker would think so little of me as
well.
“Not me too what?” he asks frowning at me still not looking happy.
 “Doesn’t matter” I shake my head at him defeated “What happened to Harry?” I
sigh looking around the room just in case I missed him.
“What’s going on with you and Sophie?” he asks ignoring my question.
“She thinks I’m a whore, don’t ignore my question”
“He’s gone back out there, I told him I needed to speak to you” he sits on the bed
and pats the space beside him I ignore the invitation and put my hands on my hips
waiting for him to get what ever he needs to say to me over with
“Please sit Brooke” he sighs deeply.
“I think I’d rather stand for this one, don’t worry I’m sure I can handle it I’m on a
roll today so just get on with it”
“Let’s start with your lip, who hit you, don’t even try and say you slipped or fell”
“This” I say pointing to my lip “Is the reason Sophie and everyone else thinks I’m a
whore”
“I don’t understand … did Sophie hit you?” he asks looking confused and shocked.
“No” I say quickly shocked that he would think that.
“Then I really don’t understand”
I sigh and sit down next to him on the bed “I have nightmares every night only they
stop when I spend the night with you, I didn’t notice until it happened more than
once. Sophie noticed it when you joked earlier that we lost sleep because you wasn’t
there. She thinks that I’m relying on you and that you’re going to let me down and
leave me broken, I told her that isn’t the problem and that I’m already broken or I
wouldn’t have them in the beginning. Then she said that everyone thinks that I’m a
whore because I spend most nights with you but talk to other guys at parties and
things. Everyone assumes I’m sleeping with you regularly but having one night stands
as well. I asked if she thought that as well and she just shrugged”
“You still haven’t answered my question but first of all I’m sure Sophie didn’t mean
what she said”
“I know, but it’s just out of all the things to call me that one really cuts deep”
“I keep the nightmares away?” he frowns at me as he asks this one.
“Don’t ask me to explain it because I can’t” I shrug at him “It’s hard for me to trust
anyone especially men, the only thing I can think is that I don’t have nightmares
around you because if I did I would have to explain stuff to you and it’s my bodies
way of keeping the secret maybe?” I ponder aloud knowing that it doesn’t matter
because I’m going to have to explain it all to him now.
“So what are the nightmares about?” he lifts his hands towards me but I flinch back
before I can stop myself. He mutters a curse and stands “You can come in here with
someone you don’t even know, but I go to touch you and you act as if I’m going to
hurt you Brooke!” he shouts at me.
“Do you think it’s easy for me to have to watch the pain I see flicker in your eyes
every time I flinch away from you? Because it isn’t. Every time I see that a small part
of me dies, knowing that every time it happens around you, he has won” I call back
just as loudly.
“Who has won?” he’s impatient now.
“It’s not fair to ask me to remember them” I whisper as he sits back on the bed by
me.
“Yeah well it’s not fair for me to know someone has hit you and I don’t even know
who it is or what to do about it” he tells me softly.
“I would gladly take a beating everyday for the rest of my life and not cry, cower
away from it or attempt to fight back. Simply because if it’s happening to me and
he’s doing it to me, he isn’t doing it to someone else. I can handle it and live through
the pain; another girl might not be able to. I can’t stop what’s happening and save my
life but I can save someone else’s. So please I am begging you Tucker don’t try to
change the way it was supposed to be” I beg him quietly.
“A man does this to you?” he asks menacingly quiet.
“It’s been going on for eight years tomorrow” I shrug trying not to remember my
thirteenth birthday. “It’s too late to change anything now” I sigh now the memories
are pushed back.
“Does anyone else know about this?”
“Sophie, Matt and Luke are the only ones and now you”
“They know and they haven’t done anything?”
“I told you, there’s nothing that can be done”
“Brooke, you don’t have to go through this alone. Talk to Sophie she loves you” he
says softly.
I lay back on the bed and close my eyes “The saddest thing is there are a so many
people in my life that claim to love me but how can any of them mean it when none
of them completely know me?” I ask sadly, realising how alone I truly am in this
world. I feel the bed dip when Tucker lies down next to me and wraps his arms
around me.
“I’ll stay with you every night if it means that you don’t have to live through
whatever keeps you awake at night” he tells me and kisses my forehead.
“I’m glad I met you” I curl myself deeper into him.
We both jump up off the bed when the door bursts open.
“Oops sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt” Beth smirks at us before she closes the door
again.
“Promise me you won’t tell anyone anything that I’ve told you tonight” I ask and
search his eyes.
“I promise” he smiles at me and I can see the determination in his eyes but see no
sign of a lie.
“I suppose I better go talk to Sophie” I sigh standing up and straightening my top
and jacket.
“Yeah, do you want me to stay with you tonight?” he asks getting up from the bed
himself.
“No, I think Sophie and I need a night to sort things out, thanks though” I smile at
him as I leave the room to find Sophie. After trying to hunt her down I find out she’s
already left so I head back to our room hoping she’s there.

Someone joining me in my bed wakes me up.

“Tuck?” I ask quietly.
“No it’s me, I just got in. Sorry for what I said earlier Brooke. I was tired and
stressed, I shouldn’t have said what I did it was wrong of me. Of course Tucker can
still stay in our room if it helps you”
“It’s okay, he knows now, I told him everything earlier”
“You’ll be okay but promise you won’t go back there” she asks quietly settling down
next to me bed.
“I promise. He wasn’t there today, just my mom” I whisper as the sleep takes me
once again.
 Chapter Seven

“I had sex with your boyfriend last night” I look up to see Beth staring at me with a
smug smile on her face.
“Who’s my boyfriend?” I ask truly confused.
“Tucker” she says turning to look at him I follow her eyes and see he is watching us
both.
“He’s not my boyfriend” I say for what feels like the millionth time this week.
“Sure, everyone knows you are in love with him, he’s not in love with you though
because he slept with me, so that shows you how much he cares”
“He can sleep with who ever he wants, we’re just friends, I wish people would start
realising that that’s all we are, I’m getting bored with all the accusations now”
“Please, I’ve seen the way you look at him” she says smugly. I resist the urge to roll
my eyes.
“What do you want Beth?” I ask bored now
“To let you know that no matter who you love or what ever it is you call it, I will
always be there, and they will always choose to have sex with me over you”
“Beth really, everyone knows how easy it is to get you in to bed”
“I can’t help it if men like me, just like I couldn’t help it when Jason liked me when
you were with him” she says smugly again
“No honestly its just because you are a guarantee lay, the only problem is, they do
it because they know that you will definitely put out where as it you do it because you
are so insecure that you need a cock inside you to feel something because without
that you are empty”
I wasn’t expecting the slap, I don’t think I even realised it happened until I could
taste the blood in my mouth as the cut on my lip is ripped back open from the force.
“Did you feel anything then?” I ask her, I know I’m just encouraging her, but this
girl really gets on my nerves.
“You know, it doesn’t matter what you think of me, but who’s the insecure one who
walked around for months hiding her body and not talking to anyone, it wasn’t me
that was you. The reason no one really wants you like they want me is because
you’re so fucked up, do you honestly think that I haven’t seen the way you have
flinched away from people when they come too close or when they touch you in a
certain place, in a certain way? What’s the matter, bad childhood?” I narrow my eyes
at her, getting a queasy feeling in my stomach not sure I can handle what she’s going
to say next.
“You know last night, Tucker spoke about you, I have to admit you made an
interesting topic for pillow talk” I’m knocked aside and notice Tucker has joined us
looking nervous.
“Brooke?” he asks looking between us both. I ignore him and stare at Beth waiting
for her to continue, she learns over and whispers six words in my ear that knock the
breath out of me.
“Step daddy never loved you either”
I’m not a violent person, after everything that has done to me I have learned that
fighting back isn’t the answer. However after hearing my secret whispered back to
me by the one person who will use it taunt me this goes out the window. I pull my
arm back to slap/punch her but its grabbed and before I know what’s happening I’m
being swirled around the dance floor. Once we have stopped, my arms are pulled up
and around a neck, looking up I relax when I see I’m dancing with Todd.
“She’s not worth it” he assures me as his hands settle on my hips and we
automatically move to the beat surrounding us.
 “I know, normally I can just let it go but she really gets on my nerves sometimes”
“What did she say to make you want to hit her?”
“Nothing that’s important” I shrug it off
“Happy Birthday by the way”
We settle into the dance and are silent for the longest time and unconsciously
adapt our dancing to the songs, one of my favourite songs off all time comes on and I
smile widely until I can see him looking around and back at me nervously, following
his gaze I can see that quite a few people are watching us.
“You do realise that by tomorrow morning your name will be added to the list of
people I’ve supposedly had sex with right?” I ask him not sure how he will like being
part of my ongoing rumour.
“Meh ... I’ve had worse things said about me” he smiles down at me.
“Well it wouldn’t have been long until you were added to it regardless, I wonder
what they will do when they run out of names to add on it” I ponder aloud.
“Can’t be easy, having everyone say these things about you” he notes
sympathetically.
“Want to have some fun with it?” I ask feeling the earlier fight not forgotten but
wanting to take my mind off it.
“What did you have in mind?” he asks smiling back at me.
“Just work with me and I’m probably going to kiss you, you should know which I
haven’t done to any of the other people on my list by the way so our rumours might
be extra special” he just laughs and shakes his head at me as I press myself up closer
to him, he picks it up straight away and starts moving his hips against mine, I block
out everyone around us and don’t take my eyes from him as we continue dancing
seductively, I move my hands up and thread my fingers through his hair, playing with
the ends of it that rest on the back of his neck, he lowers his head down to mine the
same time he moves his hands around until they meet at the bottom of my back at
the same time our lips meet. Secretly I’m impressed by the perfect timing of this
move making me smile when we pull apart. I look over his shoulder and see Tucker
coming towards us frowning, when he catches my eye I shake my head at him with a
glare he just stands there for a few minutes watching me.
I tear my eyes away from his and look up at Todd, noting my expression, he smiles
sympathetically at me.
“Want to go? We can share a taxi” I nod and he pulls me through the crowd
towards the door, as I’m about to get into one of the waiting taxi’s I hear my name
being called, I turn to see Tucker stood at the door to the bar. “Wait!” he shouts
making his way over to us.
“Don’t” Is all I reply shaking my head at him and get into the taxi.
I manage to hold it together for the journey home, Todd seems to understand that
I don’t want to talk about it and tries to distract me by telling me stories of a few
walks of shame he has done in the past, it half woks and he manages to get a few
giggles out of me.

As I walk through the door to my dorm I feel the first tear fall down my cheek I
wipe it away as soon as I see Sophie and Matt sitting at the table drinking coffee. I
make my way towards the coffee machine their conversation stops. “Your cousins an
ass” I say to the coffee machine knowing that they will know straight away who I’m
talking about. They don’t say anything until I join them at the table.
“What happened to your lip?” Sophie asks making me remember the slap and the
split lip I had forgotten about until now I lift my fingers to my lip it’s not sore, but then
again I’ve had worse.
“Beth” Is all I say and watch as Matt visibly winces. I cock my head at him vaguely
wondering if he knows what he told her.
“I don’t understand, what’s she got to do with anything?” Sophie asks looking
between me and Matt “She’s always been a bitch; she’s never hit you before though”
“Tucker” Matt simply says, as if that explains everything.
“I still don’t get it”
“Tucker slept with her last night, she came up and told me about it, made some
comment about sleeping with Jason when I was with him and I told her she has to
have a cock inside to her feel something otherwise she’s empty”
“Ouch” Sophie grimaces.
“Yeah ... she slapped me for that one”
“Still doesn’t explain why Tuckers an ass though…” she questions.
“Well after she slapped me I didn’t back down and then she got smug and …” I trail
off remembering the look on her face as she told me what he had revealed to her.
“And …” Sophie prompts looking to Matt who just shrugs and turns to me
expectantly.
“He told her” I whisper. Sophie reaches out and clasps my hand with her own
encouraging me to carry on. “He told her about my step dad, the abuse, me flinching
when someone comes too close when I’m on my own with them”
“She must have been lying … he wouldn’t do that” Sophie pleads, to who I don’t
know.
“Well who then because it’s only you two, him and Luke that knows any of that shit
and he was stood right by us, watching, listening to her tell me” I snap at her.
“I’m so sorry Brooke, I knew he slept with her, she was leaving the dorm this
morning when I went over to see him. I had no idea what he told her though”
“It’s fine, it’s my own fault, guess I just have to be more careful with who I trust
that’s all. I thought it would have taken longer than a few hours for him to tell
someone though.”
“What happened after she said all that to you?” Sophie asks warily.
“I very nearly punched her, not sure why, I probably should have punched him but
Todd pulled me away from them both. Tucker tried to stop me leaving with him but I
don’t want to talk to him ever again”
“Why would he try and stop you leaving with Todd?” Sophie asks confused.
“I kissed him” I say quietly hoping they won’t make a big deal out of it.
“What?” okay so obviously she is going to make a big deal out of it.
“We kissed, he pulled me away from them when I was about to hit her and started
dancing with me to distract me and then everyone was staring and we were talking
about how by tomorrow it would be going around that we had sex, so we decided to
have a little fun with it and give them something to talk about, it’s no big deal we are
just friends anyway, not long after the kiss Tucker was storming over to us but he
must of guessed from the look I sent him because not to come any closer because he
just stood there watching me, Todd picked up on it and we shared a taxi home” I
shrug and grab my phone that is vibrating again, I look at the screen to see a bundle
of missed calls and texts. All the missed calls are from Tucker and a few of the texts
too.

Tucker: Please pick up your phone

Tucker: Just hear me out
Todd: If you need to talk, I’m here
Tucker: I’m sorry x

“He text you?” Sophie guesses but it comes out like a question,
 “Yeah, he says he’s sorry and wants to talk to me”
“Are you going to talk to him?” Matt asks the only reply he gets is a raised eyebrow
from me and an ‘are you stupid’ look from Sophie. My phone beeps again.

Beth: Step daddy doesn’t love you either.

I surprise myself with the noise that tears through my mouth it’s a cross between a
growl and a scream. Without thinking about it throw my phone at the wall. Sophie and
Matt stare at me open mouthed.
“Him?” Sophie asks quietly
“Beth” I grit out getting up and grabbing my jacket a force of determination taking
over me.
“What are you doing?” she asks looking nervously from me to Matt.
“Something I should have done a hell of a long time ago”
“Brooke, no stay here”
“No”
“Let me come with you” she pleads.
“No, you can’t fix me Sophie so stop fucking trying” I snap as I run out of the dorm
towards my car. I know I probably shouldn’t be driving right now after the few drinks I
had earlier but I’m pretty sure all the drama and betrayal has sobered me up
completely. Gritting my teeth and not even bothering to look back I head out to the
one place I swore I would never visit alone again.

I don’t even bother to turn the engine off as I jump out of the car and head up to
the door banging my fist on it so hard I tear the skin on my knuckles.
“Open up, I’m here” I shout at the door as I continue constantly banging it with my
fists. I’m just about to add a kick when it flies open and reveals my mom stood in her
dressing gown looking not happy at all, well that’s good because I’m quite pissed off
myself I think as I barge past her into the house and stop just before the stairs, my
step dad is running down them dragging a top over his head I start clapping my
hands loudly.
“Well if it isn’t the man of the hour, look I’ve got a split lip and it’s not even from
you!” I point to the cut on my lip in-between claps.
“What the hell is going on Brooke?” Phin asks from the top of the stairs.
“Go back to bed” Sam says tightly to him not taking his eyes from me.
From the corner of my eye I can see my mom making her way towards me, I turn
my head just as she makes a grab for my ponytail, without thinking about it and way
past caring I lift my arm and elbow her in the face making her stumble back.
“You bitch” she screeches.
I watch dazed as Sam makes his way towards me with a slight smile tugging at his
lips. “Oh this is going to be interesting” he says softly with a humourless laugh.
I don’t really know what happens next and I can’t explain it, it’s as if a force has
taken over me, he lunges towards me but I move out of the way making him bump
into my mom, they stumble and land on the floor. I laugh and grabbing the first thing
that is within reach and heavy looking I swing it and make contact with his side
making him grunt. I can feel the tears running down my face as I keep swinging the
floor lamp, I’m vaguely aware of the bulb smashing and the lampshade crushing I’m
aware of the fact that my mom is no longer on the floor next to him but cowering by
the sofa.
“Brooke?” Phin’s worried voice breaks me out of my spell and I drop the lamp,
looking down at Sam who is led on the floor in the foetal position covered in glass and
speckles of blood on his t-shirt from where I smashed the glass into his side I shudder
as a wave of sickness comes over me and run back out to my car.

Not realising where I’m headed just trying to concentrate on the road through my
tears I pull up at the graveyard gate. I crawl out of the car and stumble over to my
dad’s grave. As soon as I’m front of it I collapse and years of abuse, neglect and
bullying overtake me, memories flash through my mind in a sort of twisted slide
show, every slap, every kick, every punch and every smile Sam ever sent my way, it
switches to Sophie and Matt, but I’m not in this one, I watch amazed as all their
moments of affection flash before my eyes, every hug, touch and kiss, I curl over and
watch as it switches again to me and Tucker, all the laughs, all the smiles, every joke,,
the nights on the sofa, the classes with the notes we send back and forth, the
weekend away, him holding my hand in the car, him throwing me on his shoulders at
the concert then finally him and Beth together, him whispering all my secrets in her
ear and her slapping me at the bar and whispering my own secret nightmare back to
me. I cry out a strangled scream and let the tears, pain and heartache overtake me.

I’m woken by droplets hitting my face,

I slowly pull my eyes open and the sun is coming up, I’ve slept in a graveyard all
night. I feel completely empty and drained both physically and emotionally.
Warily, not sure I have the strength I struggle to my legs, actually surprised that
they work; apart from being a little stiff I seem to be fine.
Numbly I drive back to the university and head to my room, ignoring the blatant
stares I’m getting from the early risers around the car park and inside the building, as
I walk past a window I catch sight of my reflection and feel nothing, my hair has grass
in it, I’m soaked through, my eyes are red and puffy from all the crying, my lip is
swollen and there is dried blood around it from where the cut must have started
bleeding again at some point in the night, I have dirt streaked across my face.
My eyes look as empty as I feel, I lean towards the window to get a closer look they
no longer hold the shadows of my past, there isn’t an ounce of fear in them, no
happiness and no determination or strength. If anything the only thing they hold is
defeat.
Looking down I notice my hands are covered in scrapes and cuts, there’s dried
blood on them as well.
As I make my way to my room a few people greet me, a few others ask a question
or two and the one’s who are bold enough make a comment about how I must be just
getting back from being with Todd. I ignore them all and as soon as I’m in my empty
room I give up and crawl into bed.
The nightmares don’t stop; I no longer fear them though, even in my sleep I seem
to just go through them showing no emotion. They still have the power to wake me
though. Looking around the room I notice it’s only a half hour until lunch. Standing up
and stretching I make the decision to finish the rest of my classes for the day. Once
I’m showered and dressed I head out of the room and make a mental note to buy a
new phone later.
 Chapter Eight
As I walk into the café, already decided that I’m not going to sit and eat in, a
silence falls over the whole room I look up and around to see almost everyone staring
at me, Sophie turns and as soon as she catches my eye she starts to stand up, I
shake my head at her and make my way to the food line. I hear my name being
whispered a few times but ignore it. I look over the food and pick out a sandwich,
when I go to walk forward everyone in the queue has stopped and is looking at me as
if they are waiting for something. I feel someone poke me in the side and turn to see
Beth smiling at me.
“Well?” she demands at me. I don’t reply just take the time to study her silently,
she has dark eyes, I can see the anger building up in them, she’s a little pale as if she
hasn’t eaten enough, she’s taller than me by about four inches, her hair is pulled
back into a tight bun and she’s wearing a pink summer dress. Vaguely I realised I’ve
gone back to wearing baggy clothes, as if unconsciously I have just decided to give up
on everything. “Don’t ignore me” she snaps at me bringing me out of my fog. I try to
turn around back to the line but she grabs my arm, I slowly turn around and fully face
her but not taking my eyes off the hand she has on my arm, I make no move to get
out of her grip. I feel her lean in as she digs her nails into my arm. “What’s the
matter? It finally dawned on you how unwanted you are?” she whispers in my ear
smugly.
“Actually I was thinking about all the tetanus jabs I’m going to have to get now that
you, the walking STD has put her hands on” I whisper back in her ear.
This time I’m expecting her slap. I knew it was going to happen, I did nothing to
stop it or block it however, I accepted it.
I think I was hoping that she could make me feel pain or some sort of emotion. She
goes to slap me again or maybe punch me now she knows a slap won’t get a reaction
but her hand is pulled behind her, we both look back at the same time to see a guy
older than us hold her back, I frown at him and he watches me in confusion.
“Want me to get her out of here?” he asks me.
I shake my head at him still frowning, not sure why anyone would do that and stand
up for me. He does anyway and ignoring the silence and stares again I move forward
and pay for my food.
A few people call out to me as I walk across the room to the table Sophie is sitting
at with Matt, Tucker and Luke, I continue to ignore them all and stop next to Sophie’s
chair.
“Are you staying?” she asks pulling out a chair for me. I shake my head at her.
“I just wanted to say sorry for snapping at you like that last night, I shouldn’t have
taken it out on you” I say softly to her, my voice sounds strange even to my own ears,
I guess through all the crying last night I finally lost my voice a bit.
“It’s OK, I was worried about you” she admits.
I reach up to rub my forehead and stop when I hear a collective gasp, she stands
up and takes my hands in her own examining them.
“What happened to your hands?” she asks softy searching my eyes for some sort
of explanation.
“They fell into the door to my past” I whisper staring at the cuts on my knuckles.
“Brooke, where did you stay last night?” Matt asks softly tucking a stray bit of hair
behind my ears. From the gesture I’m transported back to my early years,
remembering how my dad used to tuck my hair behind my ears after he dried it
when I got out of the bath. I feel the tear running down my cheek as he lifts his hand
to do it to the other side and close my eyes, when I open them Sophie is watching
me, waiting for an answer.
 “With the only person who has ever really loved me” I reply sadly.
Sophie pulls me into a hug and brushes the tears from my cheeks.
“You didn’t go to see Tucker or Beth last night did you?” she whispers in my ear
loud enough for only me to hear. I shake my head at her.
She lets me go and takes her seat at the table again. “You didn’t do anything stupid
did you?” She asks me while glaring at Tucker.
“Probably” I nod my head at her “Too late to change that now though” I admit with
a small smile “It was worth it though” I wink at her for making me smile again even if
she has no idea why I’m smiling.
“I’ve just heard the worst rumour yet, that you did the walk of shame this morning,
soaking wet, covered in grass and dirt and bleeding” Katie says happily rolling her
eyes as she joins the table oblivious to the silence that she walked in on.
“That one’s true” I admit, although it wasn’t quite a walk of shame.
“Must have been one hell of a night” she sighs at me, making me smirk.
“You could say that” agreeing more with the hell than she could ever understand.
A voice behind me catches my attention and turn to watch as Beth is telling a table
of people about me and Todd kissing at the bar and then leaving together and me not
returning home till this morning, I turn back to see Tucker watching me, his eyes full
of remorse.
“Seeing as though we had an eventful night last night, I’m guessing I should walk
you to class” Todd whispers in my ear, seemingly appearing out of thin air, making
me smile.
“I guess you should” I agree and tearing my eyes away from Tuckers turn to leave.
“Oh I don’t have a phone anymore as I guess you know, so I’ll be getting a new one
as soon as my classes have finished for the day, leave your number on the notice
board in our room and I’ll send you my new one” I tell Sophie as I walk away from all
the stares and whispers.
Todd accompanied me to the rest of my classes and acted as a human wall
between me and Tucker, as he walked me back to my dorm after shopping for a new
phone I finally gave in to all the gossip.
“So what did I miss, what did we get up to last night?” I ask reluctantly.
“Well some say we were all over each other at the bar and couldn’t wait till we got
to a bed so just had the taxi stop at the park on the way home and fell asleep in the
grass” he smirks “And the rest think that we made it back to mine but then you had
some sort of breakdown and got drunk in the park” he smiles sympathetically at that
one.
“Great” I sigh defeated.
“And now everyone’s talking about how you and Beth are fighting over Tucker”
“You’re not serious?” I ask a little too loudly causing a few heads to turn. “Out of all
the rumours that ones definitely the most far fetched” he raises an eyebrow at me
and I guess my reaction probably falls under the does protest too much category, but
no one else knows what he told her apart from Sophie and Matt. “Trust me, I could
happily never talk to him ever again and be happy” I stress.

***

The next five days go by in a blur, I’m physically here but not mentally. I get
through my days going to from class to class, nodding in the right places and taking
down the notes, today is the first day I have sat down with the group and had lunch
normally I just walk around campus in a daze, Beth has stayed away from me, in fact
everyone has stayed away from me, just letting me get on with it. Every now and
again I catch Sophie watching me looking worried and Tucker watching me as if he’s
struggling with something.
Every night I wait for Sophie to fall asleep and then sneak out of the room, go to
my dad’s grave and cry myself to sleep there. I haven’t heard from anyone back
home but then I don’t expect to, I know when he wants to see me he will. To be
honest I am really worried about what he will do to me when he eventually comes to
see me, I know it is going to be a lot worse than anything he has ever done before.
I’m going to have to be strong to pull through because I know he might just try to kill
me. I can’t. No I won’t let him. I have to be strong enough to fight through it.
“Damn it Brooke” I focus my eyes and frown at Matt who is shouting at me.
Everyone is watching me and Matt leans over and takes the fork out of my hand, I
look down and see blood trickling onto wrist, I had be digging the fork into my palm. I
didn’t feel a thing.
“Umm .. sorry” I mutter more to myself than anyone else.
“What were you thinking about to get you so angry?” Sophie asks me throwing a
pointed look at Tucker who pales slightly. I’m too focused on the fact that I just cut
myself with a fork and didn’t feel a thing, how can I hurt so badly and not feel it? I
need to be able to feel it to know when can’t take no more, otherwise what use will it
be.
“I hurt him” I say to no one.
“You hurt who honey?” Sophie says softly.
“I hit him … and I couldn’t stop”
“Who?” Sophie asks sounding a little worried
I turn to look at her “I made him bleed” I whisper horrified.
“You went back there?” the look she sends me tells me she thinks I’m beyond
stupid.
“He was bleeding and I couldn’t stop, I was so mad”
“It’s okay, try not to think about it” she assures me wrapping a protective arm
around my shoulders.

***

As I pull on my jacket and pick up

my keys, a feeling of dread comes over me, it’s not bad enough to stop me going
though and I always get a feeling like this when I sneak out at night but tonight it
seems to be a bit stronger.
“Brooke?” Sophie’s quiet voice calls out to me.
“I’m just going for a walk Soph, I won’t be long, go back to sleep” I say softly to her
“I know you go out every night, can’t you just tell me where you go so I know
you’re safe?” she asks, breaking my heart a little. I shake my head and walk out the
door. I don’t want anyone to know where I spend my nights; they won’t understand
and try to stop me doing it.
My thoughts briefly drift to Sophie and what a good friend she has been to me
since we first met as I make my way through the graveyard until I’m stopped dead on
my feet by a figure bent over my dad’s grave. I frown and squint my eyes trying to
see who it is, It’s a man, he’s tall and he hasn’t heard me coming or if he has he is
just ignoring me. Something in his had catches the light and I feel the blood drain
from my face as I watch him swing the hammer in his hand above his head then
bring it down quickly, hitting the grave. Instinct takes over and I’m running.
“Noooooo!” I scream so loud my chest hurts.
The man swings around startled and I watch as my step dad throws his head back
and laughs at me. I don’t stop running towards him not taking my eyes off the grave
to see how much damage has been done so when I reach him and he puts out an
arm in front of me I’m not expecting it and fall straight to the ground with a crash
knocking the air out of me. I try to get back up but he sits on top of me straddling my
stomach. I watched amazed at how calm I am when he raises a fist and it crashes
into my face. Blood flows from my nose and scream out. I try to struggle against him
but he’s too strong. I swing my arms about at an attempt to hit him but he grabs
them and pins them above my head using his own.
“I’m going to enjoy watching you struggle. And I’m going to take you on top of
you’re fathers grave so he can see what a whore you really are” he laughs down at
me. He grabs my breast through my top and squeezes it hard making me whimper.
He shoves his mouth onto mine and I turn my face to the side so he gets my cheek.
He bites me and lifts his head up. “Look at me” he shouts down at me. I turn my face
to look him in the eye. I don’t know why I do it but I spit at him, it goes in his eye
making him swear and close his eye just as his head reaches down I hit it with my
own wincing at the pain that flashes above my eyes. He stumbles back off me and I
struggle to stand but he’s quicker than me and kicks me back down. The kicks keep
coming and I try my best to block them but my body starts getting tired. When
another kick doesn’t immediately follow I look up to see he’s picked up his hammer.
He can see me watching him horrified and laughs again, I close my eyes and wait for
the blow, the one I know will end it all.
It doesn’t come; instead I hear a loud grunt. I gingerly open my eyes to see Tucker
on top of Sam throwing punches and from what I can make out not missing one.
“Stop!” I shout not knowing how far Tucker will go. He stops and seems to be trying
to catch his breath. I shake my head at him wiping away the tears from my face but
they don’t stop falling “He’s not worth it … stop” He throws the hammer to the
ground next to me and gets up. I watch confused as he pulls Sam up off the ground
and pushes him away.
“Get out of here and stay the hell away from her, next time I won’t stop” he growls
at him. He stands watching as Sam stumbles his way out of the graveyard. I crawl
over to my dad’s grave crying out in pain as my ribs protest against any movement I
make. I wrap my arms around the headstone and cry, unable to stop. I can hear the
deep howling cries that tear through my mouth but don’t care or even attempt to
stop them. Tucker comes at sits next to me and I turn on him.
“What are you doing here?” I yell at him, still crying.
“I followed you, just like I have for the last three nights. I usually just sit in my car
and watch you, to make sure you’re safe” he says quietly.
“That’s not for you to do! You shouldn’t be here, this is where I come, th0is is
supposed to be my happy place!” I shout at him. Before I realise what I’m doing my
fists go flying and I’m punching his shoulders. “I don’t want you here. I don’t want you
anywhere near me.”
“I’m sorry Brooke” he makes no attempt to stop my attack.
“I hate you” I yell trying to put more force behind my punches but not finding the
strength.
“I know I’m sorry” Still not trying to stop my attack which takes my anger up
another notch.
“I trusted you and you told” I scream at him as a painful sob breaks through “I
trusted you!” I cry softly and give up on my attempt to hurt him because it obviously
isn’t working. He wraps his arms around me and pulls me into his chest. “You told” I
cry into his chest as he rocks us both back and forth letting me cry.
“I’m so sorry Brooke, so sorry I don’t know what I was thinking. I was drunk she
was bitching about you and it all just came out. I’m so sorry...” he says quietly
stroking my hair.
“You told” is all I can say, he doesn’t reply just picks me up and carries me to his
car. I drift in and out of sleep in the car and he carries me up to the dorm knocking
softly on the door. I pull my eyes open as the door opens and Sophie and Matt stand
in the doorway staring at us. Sophie’s mouth drops open at the sight of me and I
groan. She takes a step towards us but Tucker shakes his head at her and says
something I don’t hear but it makes her take a few steps back. He puts me down on
the sofa and climbs on next to me and wraps his arms around me, holding me close.
Waiting for me to break down again I suspect. Sophie and Matt join us and start
asking questions, all of which Tucker answers thankfully.
“Are you okay Brooke” Matt asks, I look across and see Sophie crying softly.
“Yeah, step dad, hammer, hit my dad’s grave, then hit me, was going to kill me.
Tucker stopped him and hit him. Step dad went. Tucker told and I hit him. Tucker said
he’s sorry and I’m still alive” I mumble sleepily. I can’t hear the rest of what’s said. I
feel a blanket being pulled over us and snuggle down.
“It’s over now Brooke” he reassures me stroking my hair.
“It’s never over, not for me” I mumble and let the sleep take me.
 Chapter Nine
When I finally wake I attempt to stretch out a little but groan as my body resists the
small movement.
“Brooke?” Sophie calls softly.
I turn my head and see she’s at the table with Matt and Tucker I close my eyes
again and groan as flashes of last night come back to me. “I’m here” I call back
knowing how worried she must be about me.
“Here” I open my eyes again and she’s crouched in front of me holding a glass of
water, two aspirin and Matt is next to her offering me a cup of coffee.
“Thanks” I say weakly accepting the water and pills first.
“How bad is it?” Matt asks as I take the coffee from him.
“I’m mostly sore and I have a killer headache. I’m glad I don’t have to go in today, I
don’t think I could manage it” I admit.
I look over to where Tucker is sat at our table, he has he back to us and his head
resting in his hands. I frown when I realise he hasn’t said a word since I’ve woken up.
Noticing my frown Sophie squeezes my hand, I turn my attention back to her and
shake shakes her head sadly at me.
“I’m going to have a bath” I smile reassuringly at her and she helps me up and to
the bathroom.
“He’s struggling with what he saw last night, he thinks he should have got to you
sooner when he realised what was happening you were already on the floor” Sophie
says quietly while I run my bath.
“It’s not his fault” I sigh stripping out of my clothes.
“I don’t think anyone will change what he thinks” she whispers before she leaves
me to wash away the night before.
I stay in the bathtub while the water drains away and watch horrified as my bruises
are revealed one by one.
The tears run down my face and I give in to the soft quiet sobs knowing no one can
hear me. When I climb out of the bath my vision is blurred from the tears and I slip on
the tiles, I cry out in pain as I land on my side, leaning up against the bath I hang my
head in between my legs and continue to cry.
“Brooke?” Tucker shouts shouting frantic as he bursts through the bathroom door.
“I fell” I tell him between sobs lifting my face to look at him.
“You should have called, I would have helped you. Sophie and Matt went out to
grab something for dinner” he takes a few cautious steps towards me grabbing a
towel on his way. He lays the towel on my shoulders.
“Need a hand?” he asks keeping his eyes on my face instead of my naked body. I
nod up at him and wrap the towel around me. He helps me out of the bathroom, turn
to sit down on my bed and my towel slips, I make a grab for it but I’m not quick
enough, I watch as it falls revealing my red and blue angry looking body.
I hear a strange noise and look up at Tucker as I sit on the bed.
“Brooke …” he chokes out.
“It’s okay” I shake my head at him the tears falling freely once again.
“It’s not I should have been there sooner. I could have prevented this” he sits next
to me on the bed
“I told you before, no one can stop what happens to me” I nudge his shoulder with
mine “You saved me though, you stopped him when he was about to …” I trail off on
a sob thinking about what could have happened had he not been there.
“When I seen him with that hammer…” he shakes his head not able to carry on,
the light catches on a tear rolling down his cheek.
 “I missed you” I whisper resting my head on his shoulder hating that I’ve caused
him pain.
“I’ve missed you too”
I turn my head to his as his arms wrap around me so I’m looking into his eyes
hoping he can see the pure appreciation in them “Thank you for saving me” I whisper
“Always” he whispers back laying us down and pulling the side of the blanket up so
it’s covering my naked body. Surprisingly I had forgotten that I’m naked in his arms
my front pressed against his. He places a soft kiss on the side of my mouth “He won’t
hurt you again, I’ll make sure of it”
I’m not sure how long we lay like this, wrapped in each others arms in silence apart
from sniffing back sobs until the tears finally fade from both of us.
“Right you’re not staying in bed all day Brooke, Tucker help her over to the table,
we bought her favourite” Sophie announces walking into the room followed by Matt,
none of them blink an eye at our position so used to us sleeping together.
“Uhh …” Tucker looks down at me frowning I look back up at him but he turns his
attention back to Sophie and Matt. “Matt could I have a word outside with you a
minute?” I watch as he waits for Matt to leave the room before he turns back to me.
Sophie is watching us just as confused as me. “Will you help Brooke get dressed? She
fell in the bathroom” He says to her quietly.
I blush as I remember my nakedness and Sophie’s eyes fall to the floor, her
eyebrows shoot up and I assume she’s noticing my dropped towel for the first time.
“Sure” she says blinking at how close we are and Tuckers arms that are still
wrapped around me.
“You didn’t ….” She starts once Tucker has left the room.
“No!” I say horrified. She doesn’t say anything further she just throws me some
underwear and yoga pants which I manage to put on my self. I shake my head when
she holds up a bra and put the T-shirt over my head and pull it down while she helps
put my bad arm through the hole.
By the time the guys return back to the room we are sat at the table waiting for
the food to cook.
Tucker takes a seat next me and I smile my appreciation at him for getting Matt
out of the room while I get dressed without drawing the attention to the fact that I
had no clothes on. He grins and winks at me.
Through dinner we talk about parties and upcoming exams. My mood lifts along
with everyone else’s as we move on to the sofa’s and watch a couple of comedies.
Tuckers phone beeps but he ignores it, I then remember that Matt and Sophie have
been ignoring their phones all day too. I don’t say anything straight away because I
know that I have something I should have done by now too.
As if he can read my mind my phone rings, everyone watches me as I answer.
“Hey” I say into the phone ignoring them.
“Hey yourself. You okay?”
“Yeah, what are you doing later? I’d like to do it tonight please if we could”
“Are you sure Brooke? You’ve had a hard week”
“I’m sure, trust me. It’s time; I’ve put it of for too long”
“Fine I’ll be out front in an hour”
“Could you come up to my room instead?” I ask biting my lip nervously.
“I’m not going to like what I see am I?” He asks sighing.
“No, I’ll see you in a bit” I hang up and turn to the others who are still watching me.
“Something happening tonight?” Sophie is the first to speak.
“I know you lot have been fielding messages all day and night and you all have
somewhere to be. I really do appreciate you all being here for me and taking care of
me but I have something I need to do tonight, something I should have done last
weekend”
“With all due respect Brooke, the last time you said that to us you went a little
crazy” Matt says softly, Sophie glares at him but I smirk.
“It’s nothing like that, in fact this is what I should have been doing when I said I had
something to do last weekend instead of what I did. I’m not in any danger. I’m going
to be fine”
“Can you tell me what you’re doing?” Sophie asks me pleadingly.
“Luke’s going to help me do something that’s all, it’s nothing to worry about and I’ll
only be gone a few hours, it’s something we’ve done every year since we were
sixteen”
“You’ve known Luke that long?” Tucker asks surprised then I remember when he
first spoke to me he thought Luke and I were together.
“Umm yeah, I’ve known him about ten years all together, why?”
“I thought you met him through Sophie” he frowns at me.
“No I met him when I met Brooke, he helped her move here” Sophie tells him
frowning “Well I suppose we could go out for a few hours, I like knowing your with
Luke, he wouldn’t let anything happen to you” Sophie smiles kindly at me but I notice
Tucker wince.
“Sometimes it can’t be helped” I tell her squeezing Tuckers thigh, he thinks last
night was his fault which is bad enough.
I watch as Sophie and Matt sort themselves out before they head out.
“You’ll call me if you need anything right?” She asks leaning over the sofa to give
me a quick hug.
“Of course” I assure her.
They let Luke in as they leave. “He’s going to shout at me, just let him” I quickly
whisper to Tucker, knowing what Luke’s reaction will be once he has seen me. He
doesn’t have time to say anything back as Luke walks towards us.
He doesn’t have to say anything I already know the routine.
“Could you help me up please?” I ask Tucker once Luke has taken him place in
front of us.
He backs up a few steps as Tucker stands me up, using my good hand I lift my shirt
up to just below my breasts.
“You promised me Brooke” he shakes his head at me “You promised you wouldn’t
go back there no matter what. How many times does this have to happen to you?” he
shouts.
I lower myself back onto the sofa Tucker helps when he notices me wince.
“Did he …?” Luke asks quietly, flicking his eyes to Tucker but I know he’s not asking
anything about him he’s asking if my step dad finally raped me.
“No, He tried but I fought back” I say just as quietly “Then Tucker showed up and
stopped it”
“You went there?” Matt asks him surprised.
“It wasn’t at the house” I answer before Tucker can.
“Then where the hell was it? You told me he would never come here. I knew we
should have moved further away” he’s shouting again.
“The grave yard” Is all I tell him.
“Brooke” he sits in the chair opposite us and runs his hands down his face.
“He won’t go back there” I try for reassuring but I sound desperate even to my
own ears.
“You’re going back there?” Tucker asks clearly not happy with this.
“Why were you there?” Luke asks him in return, turning on him now.
 “I was following her, she’d been spending the night there for the last week” Tucker
answers him calmly.
“Well if you were there, why didn’t you stop him sooner? You know if you hadn’t ...”
“Enough” I cut him off not wanting them to get into a shouting match. “Luke are
you coming with me or not?”
“Is he?” he asks not breaking his glare at Tucker.
I turn to Tucker who is in return glaring at Luke. “Aren’t you going out?” he shakes
his head in answer.
“Okay well I’m fine with him coming if you are?” I ask Luke knowing he doesn’t like
Tucker after last weekend.
“It’s probably better if he comes anyway, just in case he does turn up again that
way one of us can stay with you” Luke says finally looking at me “If he is there, he
won’t try anything if there’s two of us”
“I’ll make it quick I promise” I assure him.
“No, you take all the time you need for this, we’ll make sure it’s empty then wait by
the gate for you” Luke shakes his head at me “Where is it?”
“In the shoe box, under my bed” I point to the box sticking out from under my bed
and ignore the questioning look Tucker is sending me.
“Are you ready?” Luke asks us passing me my jacket.
“Umm, I just need to use the bathroom and then I’m ready” Tucker stands up and
walks to the bathroom, Luke stands me up and helps get my bad arm in the jacket.
“Brooke what’s going on with you two?” He whispers pulling me into a hug.
“We’re just friends Luke” I whisper back
“He hurt you though; you shouldn’t let people that hurt you back into your life”
“He saved my life last night”
“I don’t trust him, promise me you won’t let him hurt you again” Tucker clears his
throat from the bathroom, I know he can’t hear us because we have been whispering
for the very reason that he doesn’t ear us, he’s just letting us know he’s back. We pull
apart and I smile at both of them “Ready?”
“Brooke” Luke says sternly.
“I promise” I nod at him. Tucker sends me a strange look, I’m not sure what it’s
supposed to mean so I just shake my head him, this seems to be the right answer
because he smiles again.
 Chapter Ten
It took a week for me to heal completely Tucker only ever left my side to go to
class, I know Sophie is bothered by the amount of time he spends in our room and
with me but she never mentions it. I think the only reason she never mentions it is
because whenever we are together he is too. I haven’t heard from Luke since he took
me to the graveyard but I have heard from his dad, he rang me and gave me the
number of a man that he says used to be my dad’s best friend. I haven’t rung the
number yet simply because I don’t know what to say to him.
Once I have paid for my lunch I walk past the table that we usually sit and choose a
table in the corner of the café to sit alone.
Sophie looks at me and frowns from the other table but I hold my hand up and
indicate that I’ll be over in two minutes. She nods at me but keeps watching me after
she has said something to both Matt and Tucker.
I dial in the number that Luke’s dad gave me and hold my breath until I hear the
deep voice of the man who used to be my dads best friend.
“Hello”
“Umm … hi … I know this might sound strange but my friend’s dad gave me your
number, he told me you knew my dad?” I stutter through and squeeze my eyes
closed waiting for his reply because he’s silent for a few minutes.
“Oh right, Brooke is that you?”
I blink surprised “Umm yeah it’s me?” I didn’t mean for it to come out as a question
but to my surprise he laughs softly.
“I’m Will, You might not remember me but I came to your tenth birthday party”
“Oh” I can’t remember my tenth birthday, as a matter of fact I can’t remember
any of my birthdays before my Thirteenth “Umm, not I don’t remember, sorry”
“Not a problem, god you must be what twenty now?”
“Twenty One, two weeks ago” I answer automatically.
“You should visit , a few of your dads friends live up here. He was an amazing man
your dad”
“I know” I sniff as the first tear runs down my cheek.
“We had a lot of good times together, he always spoke about you, you meant the
world to him. God … little Brooke. I can’t believe it’s you. Look I have to go but feel
free to call me anytime you want to talk or anything. I’m going to send you a picture
to your phone in a minute okay?”
“Umm sure… bye”
He hangs up the phone and I stare at it waiting for it to beep. What could he
possibly want to send me a picture of?
A few seconds pass and then my phone beeps, I open the picture message and
watch amazed as the photo loads from top to bottom, it’s a photo of my dad running
across the beach chasing a football with me in his arms. The tears fall freely now as I
look at how happy we are. My phone beeps again and a photo fills my screen again,
this time it’s of my dad swinging me around grinning.
“Brooke are you okay?” I jump up out of my seat and hug Luke tightly.
“Thank your father for me please” Is all I say to him and I guess that he knows
what I’m talking about because he laughs softly.
“Come on lets go sit with the others”
“Are you crying?” Sophie frowns at me when I take the seat between her and
Tucker.
“Yeah” I laugh wiping away the tears from my cheeks. My phone beeps and I open
the message from Will, it’s an address followed by the message that says it’s for a
pub that was my dads favourite I smile and shake my head before replying that I’ll be
down this weekend.
“Who’s that?” Sophie asks leaning over to try and see who I’m texting.
“Will. I’m going on a road trip this weekend. There’s a pub I want to go to”
“Are you going alone?” Sophie asks me.
I look across the table and catch Luke’s eye, I grin at him and he rolls his eyes at
me. ”I promise not to cry and I won’t get stupidly drunk, we can stay in a hotel” he
smirks at the hotel room comment and gestures to everyone around the table “You
can bring Katie, please Luke don’t make me go meet this man on my own” I know I’m
begging but I don’t care.
“Fine then we’ll all go. I want to meet this guy before you spend any time with him.
As long as you promise not spend any time with him on your own remember you
don’t know him.”
I squeal excitedly drawing the attention of everyone else in the café. “I promise” I
smile now I have something to look forward to, some way of being close my dad.
“Okay what’s going on?” Sophie asks looking between me and Luke.
“The other day Luke’s dad sent me the number of a man who used to be best
friends with my dad. I just rang him and he invited me up this weekend, he gave me
the address of my dad’s favourite pub and sent me some photos. He said he knows
me and has met me before. I just want to go up and have a look around. Its three
hours away from here. Are you coming?”
She looks at Matt who shrugs and then turns back to me grinning “Hell yes! Road
trip” she hi-fives me making me laugh and shake my head at her.
I turn to Tucker and raise an eyebrow “Are you in?” I ask hopefully.
“Sure” he grins at me and puts his hand across my back to squeeze me “Wouldn’t
miss it for the world”

***

He’s leaning over me; we’re touching, chest to chest, skin on skin. He lowers face
to mine and our lips meet softy, I feel his hand move up my body from my leg and
stopping to caress my bare breast. I let out a moan and his tongue slides in, moving
against mine. I run my hand along his chest and down his back; I can feel his chest
vibrating as he groans. He keeps moving inside me and I can feel the pressure
building up inside me, I let out a moan when he shifts slightly but he silences me with
a kiss. I turn my head to the side as he trails kisses from my jaw to my neck. I call out
his name as the orgasm takes over me.
I feel myself convulse and I snap my eyes open, Tucker is laying next me deep in
sleep, fully clothed. “Shit, shit, shit, shit” I groan and carefully as to not disturb him
get out of bed and sneak out of his room.

I am completely embarrassed and a little bit in shock. I’m not actually sure what
happened to me but that’s the first time I’ve ever … well been left feeling relaxed.
And it would happen over a dream of Tucker. I have no idea how I’m ever going to
look at him in the eye ever again without blushing.
I’m still embarrassed by what happened to me as I make my way to wards the
usual table full of my friends and ... Tucker.
“Hey, where did you rush off to this morning?” he asks me as I take my seat next
to Sophie.
“I had to … umm I had some stuff to take care of” I answer not looking up from my
plate.
 “Are you okay Brooke?” Sophie asks me quietly. I shake my head at her. I see her
stand up from the corner of my eye and she pulls me up with her. We walk over to
the vending machine out of earshot of everyone.
“What’s wrong?” she asks looking at me but I don’t meet her gaze.
“I’m pretty sure I had my first orgasm” I tell her quietly.
“And that’s a bad thing because …” she asks frowning at me.
“I was asleep, it woke me up. I was dreaming about … we we’re … I had a dream
that I was having sex with Tucker and I woke up because I was ... you know …
coming” I whisper the last word.
I’m not sure what I expected her reaction to be but laughing so hard she has tears
running down her face isn’t it. I clear my throat to get her attention.
“I’m sorry it’s just, you’ve never and then you get woken up by … and over Tucker”
she says through her laughing.
“It’s not funny. We ’re friends and I can’t even look at him. What am I going to do?
You have to help me. I have to stay in a hotel room with him tomorrow night” I plead.
“Umm I don’t know. Just don’t tell him” she says suddenly serious.
“Well obviously” I say dryly just imagining the field day he would have with that
information.
“Look, I’ll think of something. You’re coming to that party tonight right?” I nod at
her “Well, we will have to find you someone to hook up with that should get it out of
your system” she smirks.
“Great” I mutter.
“So … was he any good?” she asks smiling mischievously. I glare at her. “Well at
least it keeps the nightmare away” she smirks and heads back to the table grinning at
everyone, letting a laugh slip out every so often.
“What was that about?” I hear Matt ask Sophie as I sit back in my chair and start
talking to Luke about the party tonight.
“You’re going right?” I confirm.
“Of course, it’s supposed to be a good one” he replies.
We both turn to see what happening at the same time and see Matt choking on his
drink hitting his chest as Sophie laughs.
I glare at her, in this moment I swear I could kill her.
She smiles sheepishly at me “Sorry, it’s too funny not to” is all she says.
Matt looks up at Tucker and then to me and starts laughing again. “Matt” I warn.
Tucker just watches us all confused. “What’s so funny? I didn’t grope you again or
anything did I?” he asks looking worried making Sophie and Matt laugh harder.
“No, it’s nothing, don’t worry about it” I assure him without actually looking at him.
“If I did. I’m sorry” he says again.
“You didn’t. You kept your hands to yourself” I tell him only adding fuel to Sophie
and Matt’s laughter. “That’s it I’m going” I say and then leave.
I decide to skip the rest of my classes and head into town to but something to wear
to the party.

Once I’ve finished getting ready I step out of the bathroom and walk past Sophie
and Matt that are sat on her bed waiting for me.
“Is that what you’re wearing?” Sophie asks taking in my black dress.
“Uh…. No. This is what I’m wearing on the way there, I’m going to put some jeans
and a t-shirt on when we’re in the car” I reply dryly.
“It’s a bit BDSM isn’t it?” she asks.
I smile to myself at the description she just gave it. My dress is black, strapless and
has no back to it just straps of black lace with a strip of black leather in the middle of
each strip criss crossing up my back.
“Come on, let’s go and no more dirty comments please” I beg as we head out to
Matt car.
When we arrive the party is already in full swing. We head straight into the kitchen
to get some drinks; obviously we have some catching up to do.
An hour, four beers and four shots later Sophie’s pulling me towards yet another
group of guys.
“Is this really necessary?” I groan to her as she adjusts my dress for me before we
reach them.
“Yes, you just need someone to distract you, you’re spending too much time with
Tucker, that’s what the problem is here” she says impatiently as I focus on standing
upright without swaying.
“Right so that’s why every time he walks into a room you’ve been literally dragging
me away into another room” I reply dryly but slightly slurred.
“Oh god. No more drinks for a while for you” she says looking me over.
“I missed lunch” I snap.
“Hey Brooke, having fun?” Ethan says joining us. He watches her with amusement
as she adjusts my dress in different ways to make the best of my breasts.
“I was until this one decided to take over me” I say not attempting to stop Sophie, I
tried once and got a lecture.
“What exactly is she doing?” he asks not taking his eyes from mine.
“Her mission is to make sure I have sex tonight” I announce amazed that Sophie
hasn’t caught on to the fact that we’re not alone.
“I’m not even going to ask”
“Thanks” I reply gratefully “Hey, you wouldn’t mind helping me out would you?” I
ask.
“Uh … what did you have in mind?” he asks nervously.
“Distract her so she leaves me alone please” I beg.
“Sure” he shrugs.
Sophie stands up and pats my shoulders “Right you’ll do” she smiles at me and
slaps me on the bum before pushing me away from Ethan and in front of two men
that are in one my classes.
“Hey Brooke” They greet me smiling.
“Hey, umm if you’ll excuse me a sec” I say and quickly walk away before Sophie
can hunt me down and throw me in front of anymore men. I head to the bathroom
but there is a queue so I head upstairs to use the ensuite.
In the bathroom I adjust my dress to attempt to cover up some of the flesh Sophie
put on show but it’s no use, I prick my finger on something and pull the top of my
dress back to see that she has pinned it to my bra. Where the hell did she get pins
from? I walk out of the bathroom shaking my head at her randomness and stop when
I see Tucker standing by the bed waiting for me.
“Hi, Tuck. You okay?” I ask eyeing him nervously, this is the first time I am looking
him in the eye since the dream.
“Yeap … I’m fine are you?” he asks watching me sway slightly.
“I’m good” I nod
“You need a ride home later?”
“No, I’m actually going to head home now” I start pulling the pins out of my dress
so I can pull it up a bit, just so I have something to do with my hands, trying to avoid
wringing them nervously.
“Brooke … have I done something to upset you?” I look up at him when I hear his
footsteps coming closer.
 “Umm, no why do you ask?”
“Well you’ve been avoiding me” he’s looking into my eyes so intensely I have to
look away.
“That’s Sophie, she’s been pulling me around the party since we got here, thrusting
me in front of as many men as possible”
“And this morning? This afternoon? Was Sophie pulling you away then?” he asks
frowning.
“Umm … no” I swallow.
“Then why have you been avoiding me?” he asks softly.
I look up at his face, his eyes are concerned, his brows are pulled together and
there is no hint of a smile on his lips. Taking a step forward so we are almost touching
but not quite I rise up a little and kiss him. I brush my lips against his softly to see if he
will return the kiss, he does and soon he is parting my lips with his tongue and the kiss
deepens. When I let out a moan that I desperately wish I could take back, I pull away
from him. He looks stunned so I take advantage of that and walk past him to the
door.
“That’s why” I whisper as I pass him and leave the bedroom wondering if I just
ruined our friendship for good.

I wake up covered in sweat and shaking, looking around the dark room. The little
light that comes through our only window casts shadows all over the room, squinting
into the dark I can see that Sophie’s bed is empty, so I turn on the lamp next to my
bed and take a shower hoping to wash away any remains of the nightmare.
Throwing on one of my old baggy hooded tops and the first thing that comes to
hand from my underwear drawer I sit at the table nursing a mug of coffee, knowing
my chances of getting back to sleep are slim to non anyway. To pass sometime I start
up my laptop and log in to Facebook. I click through the notifications that tell me I’ve
been tagged in a bunch of photos from the party earlier this evening. Seriously who
uploads photo’s at that time of night?
The flashing light on my Blackberry catches my eye and I browse through the
messages and missed calls I got while I was asleep. A few are from Sophie asking
where I am and a voicemail from her sounding worried. I quickly tap out a reply
apologising for not saying goodbye but I headed out early and fell straight to sleep
when I got back. I have two missed calls from Tucker but no messages so I send him
a message just saying ‘sorry’ and lock the phone, turning back to my laptop and
checking through my university email. My phone rings.
“Hello” I say quietly, I’m not sure, why maybe because it’s so late.
“Hey, can’t sleep?” Tucker says just as quietly.
“Bad dream, I can never get back to sleep after them”
“Do you want me to come over?”
“Umm” Do I want him to come over? I’m not sure...
“It’ll be fine. I promise”
“Are you sure it’s like three in the morning”
“I’ll be there in two, pour me some of that coffee”
I look down at my cup, surprised that he knew what I was doing. I hear him
chucking as he hangs up.
I shut down my laptop and am pouring two fresh coffees when there’s a soft knock
at the door.
“Hey” Tucker greets as he walks past me straight to the table collecting his drink.
He’s obviously just got out of bed. He’s wearing a plain white tee, jogging bottoms,
socks, no shoes and his hair is sticking up everywhere.
“I’m sorry I woke you” I say softly as I sit opposite him.
 “I’m sorry I woke you” I say softly as I sit opposite him.
“You didn’t wake me” he smiles.
I feel like an idiot, obviously if I didn’t wake him then there is another reason he is
rumpled. That other reason must still be in his bed. Shit.
“Oh” is all I can reply.
“Think you’ll be able to get back to sleep if I stay with you?” he asks smiling
encouragingly at me.
“Umm no, I don’t think we should be spending the night together anymore … The
nightmares really aren’t that bad and I can catch up on any sleep I loose in the nights
in the day when I don’t have classes”
“So you’d rather loose sleep than spend the night with me … What happened last
night?” he’s frowning at me now “Did I do something to hurt you? Is that why Sophie
was dragging you away from me tonight?”
“Eh … no. Sophie was trying to get me to spend the night with someone else,
anyone else actually. She wasn’t exactly fussy with who she was putting in front of
me” I say frowning myself now.
“Why would she want you to spend the night with someone so badly, I don’t
understand?”
“I’m not answering that” I shake my head at him beyond embarrassed.
“Does my being by you still keep the nightmares away?” he asks looking confused.
“Yes …”
“But what? I know you didn’t sleep all the way through the night last night because
you were gone early this morning”
“No I didn’t, I got woken up”
“By me?”
“Umm … kind of … no … I don’t know. It was a first” I mumble.
“Does this have anything to do with that kiss at the party?”
“Maybe, I’m sorry about that by the way”
“I’m not worried about that. I want to know why it happened”
“You’re really going to make me say it?” I ask desperately.
“Yes I’m guessing Sophie knows so that means Matt knows, I’ll ask him if you don’t
tell me and I’m thinking you might want to tell me because what ever it is I can
guarantee he will make it sound a lot worse that what it probably was”
“I doubt it” I say quietly but I know he’s heard because his left eyebrow rises.
“Okay fine. I had a dream … you were in it … it came out of nowhere … It felt so real
and it … well … lets just say the ‘climax’ of the dream woke me up feeling breathless”
I finish and watch as he chokes on his coffee. I wait patiently for him to calm down.
“Don’t you dare tell anyone! You have no idea how much crap Sophie and Matt have
been spitting at me because of it”
“Wow … that … umm … changes things” he nods at me “So Sophie wanted you to
sleep with someone else hoping the dream was as a result of you not having sex
lately and spending so much time with me?”
“Not exactly”
“Then what?”
“She thought it might distract me. Last night, or this morning was the first time I’ve
ever … I’ve never had sex before and well I don’t … you know, myself and no
boyfriends have ever … I usually just sort them out to avoid it.” Why am I telling him
all of this? Someone please put a gag on me.
“You’ve never…”
“Nope”
“Not even ..”
 “No”
“What about …”
“Nothing” I shake my head.
“And you were avoiding me because…”
“I was embarrassed! We’re friends, you don’t dream of having sex with you’re
friends and wake up mid orgasm”
“Right, well I can’t say I’ve had any wet dreams but I’ve been thinking about you in
non friendly approved ways pretty much since that day I first spoke to you.”
“Really?” I ask scrunching my nose up.
“Yeap, I just never thought you thought of me in the same way. But I guess the
feeling’s mutual”
“So you agree it’s not a good idea to spend the night together anymore then?” I
ask both hopeful and disappointed
“Hell no, I don’t agree!” he says grinning and standing up “Come on lets get to bed,
maybe you’ll be getting back to sleep after all”
I look up at him nervously biting my lip, I’m not sure what he thinks is going to
happen when we get into that bed but I am not being someone’s one night stand.
“Trust me?” he asks sincerely.
I watch him silently for a minute and decide that after everything, I do trust him, all
the nights we’ve spent together, and all the times he talked me through the hard
times. I nod at him and crawl into bed, he climbs in next to me and pulls me into him,
Tucking me under his arm so my head lays on his chest, I wrap my arm around him
across his stomach.
“You have no idea how long I’ve waited to hold you in my arms like this” Tucker
sighs above me and leans down to lay a kiss on my forehead.
“It would definitely make sleeping you’re bed easier” I tease but frown when I feel
him stiffen “What’s wrong?” I ask lifting my head to see his worried expression.
“I don’t want you to be in my bed, not anymore”
“Umm … okay”
“It just wouldn’t be right”
“Okay” I’m not going to say I understand because I don’t but I won’t push him on it,
I’m sure he will explain when he’s ready.
His arms tighten around me and I squeeze him back.
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Sure” I answer unsure.
“You never did tell me why you’ve never had any sort of sex”
“It’s hard for me to talk about … One of the last things my dad said to me before
he died was how he wished I could stay innocent forever and I guess it was the only
innocence I could save. I know that’s backwards when you consider the things I’ve
done for boyfriends in the past and the one thing I really I like doing is really not
innocent at all but I thought if I didn’t let my self get to that point then my innocence
would remain. It worked you know, until last night that is.”
“You don’t talk about your dad much, do you?” he asks softly while playing with my
hair.
“No, the years I had with him were my happiest. I try not to think about it, it’s
easier to get through all the rubbish times that way” I shrug and yawn.
“Go to sleep Brooke, we have a long weekend ahead”
“I’m glad you’re coming, thank you” I yawn
“You’re welcome” is the last think I hear him say before keeping my eyes open
becomes too much.
 Chapter Eleven
I wake up to Tucker kissing my neck just below my ear softly. I turn my head to
smile at him. “Morning” he smiles before leaning down and kissing me.
“Good morning” I smile and stretch out “How long have you been awake?”
“Not long about ten minutes, did I wake you?” he grins and starts kissing my neck
again.
“Mmmnnn” is all I can reply while he continues his assault on my neck.
I pull away and crawl over him so I’m hovering above him on my hands and knees.
He tilts his chin up silently asking for a kiss and I obey, as the kiss deepens and his
tongue softly moves again mine my knees give way and I fall onto his stomach, I pull
back from the kiss and smirk at Tucker because he’s poking me in the stomach. He
shrugs and grins sheepishly at me.
I raise an eyebrow at him and lean in to kiss him again, when he tries to deepen
the kiss I pull away and start trailing kisses down his body starting along his jaw and
down his neck disappearing under the covers letting my tongue slide down his chest
and his stomach. I pull his boxers back and take him in my hand; I squeeze slightly
then pull him into my mouth. Working my mouth up and down I hear him groan. I flick
my tongue over the head and then put my hand on the bottom of his shaft, my
mouth meets my hand and twist my head with him still inside and continue twisting
my way up and down the length of him. I hear him groan out my name followed by a
curse and know that he is getting close but I don’t stop. He pulls the blanket up over
my head so It’s bunched up in between us but I can see him over it and lift my eyes
to his not breaking the gaze until he fills my mouth, I close my eyes and swallow
through his orgasm, his head falls back on the pillow and I pull him out of my mouth
once he’s finish and chuckle quietly when he covers his face with his hands.
“Where are you going?” he asks grabbing my hand as I jump out of bed.
“To the bathroom, we have to get going. We have a long drive and the others will
be here soon”
“But … you … what …” I tilt my head at him hoping he will be able to string a
sentence together “What was that you just did?” he finally asks.
I raise an eyebrow at him “If we had more time I’d do it again but slowly so you
understand, but we don’t so get up” I pat his leg and head to the bathroom leaving
him grumbling to himself.
“Ready?” Sophie asks when I come out of the bathroom, I look around the room at
Sophie, Matt, Luke, Katie and Tucker who are all sat at the table in the kitchen area. I
look down at myself in just a towel.
“I won’t be long” I call as I grab some clothes and head back into the bathroom. I
doesn’t take long for me to get ready because I didn’t wash my hair so I just leave it
down with its natural wave.
“We’ll have to stop in a driveway on the way” Katie tells me washing her cup as I
join them all in the room and accept the take out cup of coffee that Matt hands me.
“Sure, I’ve already had breakfast though” I say straight faced and watch Tucker
stumble on his way to the bathroom.
“How was he here before us?” Sophie asks pulling me aside and gesturing towards
the bathroom.
“He came over last night” I shrug at her.
“And …” she prompts.
“And nothing” I tell her, obviously Tucker hadn’t mentioned anything because she
didn’t know why he was here and I don’t want to say anything to anyone because I
don’t know what’s happening anyway and everyone has warned me plenty of times
about him. I don’t want a lecture or any awkwardness on this trip.
“I can share a room with you this weekend and Matt can share with Tucker if you
want?” she asks watching me closely.
“No, don’t be silly. It’ll be fine I promise”
“Right let’s go then” Luke calls when Tucker comes back from the bathroom.
“Don’t worry about it” I say quietly to Sophie as we all head out.
“Who’s going with who?” Matt asks once we have reached the cars.
“We’ll take two cars three in each, Tucker can come with us and Brooke can go
with Luke and Kate” Sophie tells us all. I roll my eyes at her attempt to keep me and
Tucker apart a bit longer.

We pull into the hotel and once we have all parked the cars and gotten our
luggage, Sophie hands Matt her bag to put in their room and follows Tucker and I to
our room.
Tucker sends her a look of annoyance when we walk into our room but I just smirk
at him.
“What the hell was that this morning?” he asks me quietly when we’re finally left
alone for two minutes as Sophie uses the bathroom.
“Do you really need me to spell it out for you?” I ask him.
“That’s not what I meant … how are you so good at it?” he asks me looking slightly
annoyed.
“I like doing it” I shrug at him “There’s only so much you can do with a boyfriend
when you’re a virgin who doesn’t want to have sex. I’ve had practice”
“Who?” he asks me.
“Jason”
“And …” he narrows his eyes at me but I don’t get a chance to reply because
Sophie walks back in the room.
“Ready?” she asks frowning at Tucker who is glaring at me.
“No one” I answer him rolling my eyes before turning to Sophie “Yes, let go”
We all meet downstairs and decide to have lunch in the hotel restaurant.
“What’s the plan then Brooke, what do you want to do?” Luke asks me when we
order our drinks and have finished eating.
“I’m not sure, I’d like to meet Will but I want to do that tomorrow. All I want to do is
go to the pub tonight so what ever everyone wants to do today is fine with me”
“What’s the pub called again?” Matt asks me over his pint.
“The black horse”
“So we’ll split up and all meet there at seven?” he asks looking to Sophie for
confirmation.
“That sounds good” I answer and someone walking past our table catches my
attention, I’m not sure why the guy looks so familiar but I feel like I know him, he’s
about my age maybe a little older. Blonde, tall, good looking and very athletic looking.
He catches my eye and smiles but then does a double take and frowns at me.
Shaking his head he walks away. I frown to myself and turn my attention back to the
table, everyone is watching me.
“Umm what did you say?” I ask the table not sure if someone has spoken to me or
not.
“Who was that?” Sophie asks and I notice her and Katie are both watching the man
walk away.
“I’ll be right back” Is all I say and head over to the bar where the guy is now sat on
a stool.
 “Excuse me, sorry for interrupting you but do I know you? You look familiar but I’m
not sure?” I wince internally because what I said sounds like a lame chat up line.
“Brooke?” he asks me.
“Yeah…” Is all I can say because he gets up from his stool and pulls me into a hug.
I’m not sure what to do so I just keep my arms by my side.
“Will said you were coming” he releases me and holds me at arms length “I can’t
believe how grown up you are now” he smiles as he takes me in with his eyes.
“Umm…”
“Sorry I’m Andrew, we used to play football on the beach when you were younger,
I’m sorry to hear about your dad by the way” he finally fills me in.
“Oh, sorry I don’t remember much from before he died” I explain.
“That’s okay, how long are you in town for?”
“Just tonight.”
“My dad will want to see you, come on” He grabs my hand and I blink at the
intimacy of it.
“Is Will you’re dad?” I ask still looking at our joined hands.
“No” he laughs slightly “this is so strange, you really don’t remember?”
I shake my head at him. “I should really tell my friends that I’m leaving the
restaurant if you want me to meet your dad” I tell him sure that my friends must be
wondering what’s going on.
“Of course he’s only upstairs anyway, he’s the owner”
He leads me – still holding my hand – back to the table where everyone is sat.
“Hi guys” I smile at everyone. Sophie and Katie are staring at Andrew with their
mouths slightly open, Luke and Tucker are both staring at our hands and Matt is
glaring at Sophie.
“This is Andrew, we used to play football when my dad brought me here”
“Hi” Sophie and Kate say at the same time but it’s almost a whisper.
“Andrew this is Sophie, Matt, Luke, Katie and Tucker” I point to everyone as I say
their names and he says hello to each other them.
“Why don’t you join us?” Sophie asks him and then winces and glares at Matt, my
guess is he kicked her under the table.
“Sure” Andrew says releasing my hand and grabbing a chair from a near by table. I
take my seat and he slides his chair in between me and Luke.
“Brooke you have to have sex with him” Sophie whispers in my ear making me
choke on my drink and turn bright red.
“What?” I screech. Everyone turns to stare at us.
She rolls her eyes and pulls me up from the table. Once she has dragged me a few
paces away from the table she grabs both of my arms and shakes me slightly.
“This is very mature and inconspicuous Soph” I roll my eyes at her but keep one
eye on the table.
“Do not tell me you don’t think he’s hot” she says raising both her eyes brows at
me.
“He’s cute, but I’m not going to have sex with him, I don’t know him”
“You do! You used to play football with him. You have to and then you have to tell
me and Kate what he looks like naked” she begs I look back to the table and sure
enough Kate is staring at him almost dreamy eyed.
“Forget it. If Matt could hear you now he would kill you” I scold but can’t help
smirking at her. She has never once cheated on Matt and I don’t think she ever will
but the way she is looking at Andrew almost wistfully makes me wonder. I walk back
to the table and ignore her when she calls me back.
“Are you staying here?” Andrew asks me once I’m seated again.
 “Yes we all are” I answer
“Are you single?” Sophie blurts out and Matt glares at her once again.
“Yeah, why?” Andrew asks her.
“Just wondering” she smiles sweetly at him but pinches me under the table.
“Andrew wants me to meet his father, he knows me as well and it’s been a while
since he’s seen me so he wants me to go upstairs to meet him” I say this to everyone
but send Luke a look that says I’m not comfortable with this.
“He owns the hotel” Andrew explains to everyone when the girls send him hopeful
looks.
“Sure, we will still be here when you get back so meet us back here?” Luke says
smiling at me encouragingly.
“Fine” I smile back but glare at him “Ready?” I ask Andrew.
He takes me upstairs but only to the first floor and into an office. He dad looks
exactly like him just with a few wrinkles and a few grey hairs. His dad is just as happy
to see me and pulls me into a hug just like Andrew did. He tells me a few stories of
my dad and tells me how sorry he is that he died so young. Andrew doesn’t return to
the restaurant with me so I leave the office alone. I take the elevator up to my room
so I can collect my jacket. When I walk back out of the room towards the elevator
Tucker is leaning on the wall outside it, facing me with him one leg bent up foot on
the wall.
“How’d it go?” he asks smiling as I walk towards him.
“Good, it’s strange I don’t really remember much about this place, they both said
that my dad used to bring me up here twice a month but I can’t remember anything.
I’ve tried but I can only get a few glimpses of things” I shrug and step into the waiting
elevator.
As soon as the doors close Tucker backs me up into the wall and blocks in with his
hands either side of me.
“Well there’s a few things I can remember” He says quietly before his mouth
comes crashing down on mine. I groan as the kiss deepens and lift my arms to wrap
them around his neck. He puts one hand on my hip and keeps the other one on the
wall, I can’t help the second moan that escapes and Tucker moves his lips to my jaw
and under my ear, as he trails kisses along my neck his hand moves up my side to
cup my breast. I moan and pull his head back up to mine so he can kiss me again as
he pinches my nipple between two fingers. He presses his body into mine and I pull
myself up so I can wrap my legs around his waist and press myself against his
erection.
“Shit Brooke” He groans and puts his forehead on the wall next to my face. I
unwrap my legs from his waist as the doors open.
“Sorry” I grin at him, not sorry at all “If you’re going to start something …” I smirk
at him as I leave the lift, he doesn’t fallow me out but before the doors close I catch
sight of him adjusting his jeans muttering to himself. I laugh and shake my head
that’s the second time today I’ve walked away from him talking to himself. I bump
straight into Sophie.
“What’s so funny?” She asks eyeing me suspiciously “Where’s Tucker? He said he
was going to follow you to make sure you were okay”
“Umm … he just had to go to our room, he forgot something” I try for convincing
but fail when the snort comes out halfway through. We both turn when we hear the
ping from the lift behind us and watch as Tucker walks out holding my jacket, I didn’t
realise I dropped it.
“You forgot this” he grumbles to me and passes me the jacket.
“Thanks” I grin and slip it on.
 “We’re going shopping for something to wear tonight, did you invite Andrew?”
Sophie asks excitedly.
“No, why would I?”
“Brooke” she whines.
“Look, if you want to have sex with him carry on but I’m not” I roll my eyes at her.
“What?” Tucker asks looking at us both as if we have lost our minds.
“Sophie and Katie both think Andrew is hot and want me to have sex with him
because I’m the only single girl here and then they want me to give them a detailed
play by play afterward” I explain and Sophie hits my arm.
“What? It’s not like the whole table couldn’t see you staring at him” I roll my eyes
at her.
“He’s hot?” Tucker asks looking disgusted.
“Hell yes, the hottest guy I’ve seen in years” Sophie sighs.
“Oh my god, I’m glad he’s not coming if you’re going to be drinking. Matt would
end up in a fist fight with him by the end of the night”
“Did she invite him?” Katie asks Sophie when she joins us.
“This is crazy” I sigh.
“Give me your phone” She holds her hand out expectantly.
“Fine, but don’t ask him to come for me” I hand over my phone defeated.
“You got his number?” Tucker asks me quietly glaring at me.
“I couldn’t say no” I shrug watching Sophie and Katie both huddled over my phone
texting and giggling.
“You could have” he snaps still whispering.
I don’t have a chance to reply because Sophie hands me my phone back. I wince
when I look down at the screen and hear Tucker huff.

Can you meet me for a drink later? I’d really like to see you again to
catch up on old times.

“Soph” I practically scream. Tucker takes my phone off me and reads the text she
sent my phone beeps and the girls snatch the phone back then both squeal.
“What did he say?” I manage to grit out.
“He says ‘Sure no problem, where are you headed. I’d like to see you again too’
with a winking face”
They start texting him back and Tucker makes an annoyed sound.
“Oh please, you have a different girl almost every night. Brooke deserves some
fun. Might as well be with someone hot” she shrugs at him and walks off with my
phone followed by Katie.
“Brooke?” Tucker stops me from following them and grips my arms looking into my
eyes.
“I’m not going to sleep with him” I tell him honestly.
“Damn right you’re not” He snaps but then sighs “Do you want to?”
I frown at him not sure he actually just asked me that. “Umm no … do you?”
“No but I wasn’t the one holding his hand”
“Neither was I, he held mine” I defend.
“They’re going to be pushing you onto him tonight”
“And … Sophie pushes me onto men every weekend, I’ve never given in before.
What makes you think I will now?”
“I don’t know, they both think he’s good looking so obviously he is”
“Yes and I also know his type. He’s a player Tucker, yes he will try to get into my
panties but as soon as he realises it’s not going to happen he will be trying it with the
next girl. I’m not having a one night stand. No matter what anyone says. They might
want him but I can guarantee you that he only wants me because he’s already had
every other girl in this town. I’m not interested in someone who goes through girls
that quick”
He winces and lets me go as I realise what I just said. He is exactly what I just
described.
I sigh as he walks back in to the restaurant.
“Tucker, that’s not what I meat” I call to him but he doesn’t answer or look back.
“If we’re going shopping then lets go” I snap at Sophie and Kate as I reach the
table not bothering to sit down “And give me my phone back”
“Touchy … you know maybe you need to get …”
“Enough” I cut her off pocketing my phone.
They both start giggling so I shake my head and walk out of the hotel to get a taxi
into town. They will catch up with me once they have calmed down. They do catch up
with me just as I’m shutting the taxi door.
I have to sit through the whole taxi journey with them talking about Andrew, they
don’t stop as we head into different shops and start giggling to each other as they try
on dresses.
“You both realise you have boyfriends right” I say dryly after they ask me for the
third time if I think Andrew will like the current dresses they have tried on.
“Don’t be a spoil sport Brooke” Katie pouts at me.
“Whatever” I grumble and pay for my chosen dress that I haven’t even bothered to
try on.
“The boys have already headed to the pub” Sophie calls from the dressing room.
I’m a bit disappointed that I won’t get to talk to Tucker before we go out but push it
back.

I follow Sophie and Katie into the pub and notice that the guys are playing pool but
Sophie and Kate aren’t headed towards them they are walking to the end of the bar
that’s on the other side of the room, I roll my eyes when I see them reach Andrew.
He turns and I watch his eyes travel down my body taking in my strapless blue dress
I’m rewarded with a grin.
I lift my hand and wiggle my fingers in a weak version of a wave then head over to
the pool table.
There are a few girls crowded round the guys but I walk through them.
“Save me” I grumble to Luke as we watch Tucker take his shot.
“What’s up?” he asks not looking away from the table.
“Your girlfriend and Sophie are trying to set me up”
“With who?” He asks frowning and finally looking at me, “Where are they?”
“At the bar” We both turn and watch Sophie and Katie giggle at something Andrew
has said to them I roll my eyes but Matt glares at me.
“Why did you have to invite him?” he demands.
“I didn’t, they did”
“What do you mean they did? I think Sophie fancies him” he frowns.
“God you should be a brain surgeon” I tease trying to make light of the situation.
“What the hell?” Matt says grabbing my attention and I turn to see he’s spotted his
girlfriend. “Brooke, do something to get my girlfriend away from him” he points his
cue at me.
“What the hell do you want me to do? She’s your girlfriend you go get her”
“I don’t know, go distract him, flash him your tits or something so he start chatting
with you instead of my girlfriend”
I stare at him unable to process his request and take it serious.
“Brooke” Tucker says with a hint of warning in his tone.
“Please Brooke” Luke asks eyeing Katie.
It’s obvious that what ever I do tonight I’m going to be upsetting someone.
“You’re boyfriends are looking for you” I tell Sophie and Kate when I reach them.
“Who?” Sophie asks and then slaps her hand on her mouth “Oh … shit” she winces
and slowly turns to look at Matt.
“Yeah ... shit” I say dryly.
“Hey Brooke, you look beautiful tonight” Andrew grins at me.
“Thanks” I smile and accept the drink he hands me along with a shot.
“So your friends tell me your single?” he asks as soon as we’re alone.
“Technically I am but I’m kind of seeing someone at the moment” I smile back at
him.
“Not any of them I take it” he nods over to my friends and I turn to see what he
means. Sophie is now wrapped in Matt’s arms and Luke is kissing Kate but what
catches my attention is that Tucker has one arm on some girl’s shoulders the other
holding his drink.
“No none of them” I tell him and manage a smile as I turn back to the bar “So what
can you tell me about Will? I’m meeting him tomorrow” I sigh.
“Will’s great, he and your dad were very close. He actually manages a club not far
from here, you should check it out later. I’ll take you if you like”
He offers.
“I suppose I could, it would be easier if I know who he is before I meet him. I’m
trying to remember things but nothing is coming back to me. It’s never been this bad
before” I shake my head at myself.
“It’ll come to you, just give it time” he assures me.
I take the time to look around the bar that was my dads favourite. It had a nice feel
to it. The decorating is a bit dated but it isn’t distasteful. There are two pool tables, a
jukebox, small stage and a bar that goes around the whole room with the only gap in
it for the two bathrooms and front door.
“Want a game of pool?” Andrew asks pulling me from my inspection.
“Sure” I shrug and follow him to the pool table “I’ll rack, you break” I offer as we
reach is.
I try my best to ignore my friends as the game progresses but it isn’t easy when
they are only about ten feet away from us.
“Come on Brooke” Sophie cheers.
“No fair, you get cheerleaders” Andrew chuckles tapping me on the shoulder with
his cue as he joins me at the top of the table so I can line up my shot.
“You have your fan base” I smirk and nod my head at the group of girls that are
huddled by the table watching his every move.
“Bend over any more and you’ll give your fans a heart attack” he smirks back at
me and nods to the bar, I turn to see a group of men staring down my dress.
“Ass” I mutter as I take my shot much to his amusement.
“Tis a very nice one” He winks at me and hits my backside with his stick.
“You’re just jealous because I’m more entertaining to watch” I tease him.
“Want to bet on that?” he asks raising an eyebrow.
“What’s in it?” I ask not about to back down from the challenge.
He takes a step towards me so only our pool cues in front of us are separating us
and lowers his voice.
“I bet that I get approached by someone of the opposite sex before you do”
 “That’s not fair, you know everyone here”
“Not everyone, people we know aren’t included”
“What happens if I win?”
“If you win, I’ll do what ever three things you want, you win and you have to do
three things I want and just so you know in advance it will be very embarrassing so
back out while you can” he smirks at me.
“No chance” his arrogance surprises me, he’s so sure he’s going to win. “You’re
on” I whisper and lean up to kiss his cheek.
“Go tell your friends not to come up then” he smiles at me.
I head over to the table where they are all sat, I walk around Tucker who hasn’t
even noticed my approach because of the girl sat on his knee and make a beeline for
Matt who is thankfully not sat down but just returning to the table.
“You owe me, so make sure no one I know comes over to me at the table no
matter what I do next okay?”
“What are you going to do?” he asks looking amused.
“You don’t want to know, but I am going to kill you tomorrow and not speak to you
for a month” I grumble as I head back towards Andrew who is racking the balls
setting up for a new game. “Your break” he grins at me.
I bend over to take my shot but stop when I catch sight of him lifting the bottom of
his shirt up to scratch his stomach revealing a few muscles I’m sure he spent hours at
the gym to get. I hear a few giggles from girls around the bar and roll my eyes when I
notice that one of them is Sophie’s.
Once I have taken my shot I look up at the ceiling and pretend to look thoughtful.
“What’s wrong?” Andrew asks coming around to stand next to me and look at the
ceiling as well.
“Just wondering how I’m going to make it obvious which itch I need scratched” I
shrug and he bursts out laughing.
“Watch and learn” he winks at me bending over so his rear is at the right angle for
the ladies to ogle.
I position myself so I’m in direct sight of his corner vision and directly in front of the
guys sat at the bar as I wrap my leg around the pool cue three times.
He misses his shot and turns his head to get a better look at my leg I pull the cue
out from the coil instead of unwrapping my leg from it and smile sweetly at him “Did
you miss?”
He shakes his head at me and watches at I bend over the table slowly to take my
shot, my ball goes in and I stand at the side of the table, I don’t look at Andrew I just
look at the table putting on a concentrated expression and mindlessly run my index
finger from my throat to my chest and back up a few times. I bend over the pool
table still at the side and look over at the men sat at the bar and smile shyly at them
looking up from under my lashes.
I miss the shot and pout at the table.
“Brooke” Luke says and I hear him ask someone what I’m doing. I look up to see
Matt pull him back down when he tries to stand and shake his head at him. Everyone
at the table is watching me, Matt looks amused, Sophie and Kate look impressed,
Tucker looks annoyed and the girl who is still sat on his lap is looking at me curiously.
One of the men from the bar stands up and starts to walk towards us but Andrew
strips his shirt off then makes a point of looking at his shirt and then his cue before he
looks around helplessly, as if timed a girl steps out of no where and takes his shirt
from him making him grin and raise his eyebrows at me as the guy from the bar
finally reaches me.
“Can I buy you a drink?” he asks staring at my chest.
I glare at Andrew who just smirks at me.
 “I’m sorry, that’s very generous of you but I’m actually here with my fiancé” I tell
him putting disappointment into my voice and slipping my left hand behind my back
as I gesture towards Andrew, the girl he’s with hears me and walks away from him
pouting.
“Oh, sorry” he says then returns to the bar shaking his head.
“So we’re engaged?” Andrew chuckles down at me as he wraps and arm around
me and pulls me under his arm.
“You cheated; I have no clothes I can take off!” I accuse adding a pout for good
measure.
“Uh huh, not gonna work on me” he ruffles my hair and then grabs my arms
spinning me around so I’m face to face with him.
When it’s too late I realise he still has no shirt on and I let my eyes trail over his
upper body, “What do you want me to do?” I ask nervously when I drag my eyes up
to his.
“We’ll get to that in a minute, see that girl sat on your friends lap behind us?” he
asks and I move my head to the side to look at the girl on Tuckers lap. “What about
her?” I ask still watching her.
“Look at this” he pulls his phone out of his pocket and logs into Facebook, after a
few minutes he passes me the phone and I’m watching a video. It’s of two young girls
and two young boys, no older than ten.
“What am I looking at?” I ask looking up at him.
“Just keep watching” he says and I move my eyes back to the video.
The camera zooms in and I notice the little girl is me, I’m dancing in a paddling
pool and calling out to someone called Mel, the second little girl joins me in the pool
and dances with me, then we both start screaming when two boys run past us and
throw what looks like ice cream in our hair. The video goes blurry as me and the girl
start chasing the boys around the garden.
“That’s me, but I don’t understand” I admit looking up at him once the video has
ended.
“That’s me, you, my brother and the girl in the video is Mel. Mel is also sat on your
friends lap over there”
“Okay…” I frown and look back to the girl who is apparently Mel. I squint at her but
still don’t recognise her at all not like when I saw Andrew in the restaurant.
“I don’t remember her” I tell him turning back.
“I don’t think she remember you either so don’t worry about it”
“How many more videos have you got?” I ask looking at the phone in my hand.
“There’s a few, get your phone out and I’ll add you on Facebook and tag you in
them”
I walk past him to the table my friends are sat at.
“Can I have my phone please?” I ask Sophie, she has my phone and purse in her
bag because I didn’t bring one.
“Why? He already has you’re number” she frowns at me getting her bag off the
floor.
“He’s sending me a video” I reply impatiently.
“You have to show me it!” she exclaims handing me my phone I shake my head at
her and return to Andrew logging into my Facebook app.
“Brooke Daniels right? Which one is you?” he asks showing me the list of Brooke’s
that have come up from his search, I point to the third one and accept the request on
my phone.
“Okay I’ll tag you in them later, want you’re first challenge?” he asks me smirking.
“Of course” I nod at him and prepare myself mentally.
 “You have to get eight people to do a body shot”
I turn to the table and count six people, I look back to Andrew and note he’s the
seventh; he notices me trying to work it out mentally and grins. I turn and head to the
bar to order the eight shots, limes and some salt.
The girl with Andrew shirt comes to stand next to me at the bar and I smile to
myself as an idea comes clearly into my mind.
I place the tray of shots, lime slices and salt onto the table and gesture for Andrew
to join us.
“You six have to do a body shot, each, off each other” I announce to them.
“What? Why?” Luke asks but is cut off by Katie nudging him.
I clear the table and gesture for Matt to lay down, I set him up for the shot and
Sophie comes to take it, as soon as he is up and off the table Sophie lays down and I
set her up for one. I do the same for Katie and Luke then Tucker lays down on the
table I call Mel over and everyone except Andrew is surprised that I know her name,
they all stare at me and I look away when she starts licking the salt off Tuckers
stomach. She lays down on the table once he is up and he does the same to her but
again I look away. I set Andrew up for the shot as soon as he is led down and just like
I told her the girl from the bar does the shot. Everyone sends me different looks but I
ignore them and set the girl up for Andrew to take his shot.
“You cheated” he laughs at me once the girl has jumped down from the table and
rejoined her friends.
“You said I had to get eight people to do a body shot, not that I had to be one of
them” I smile my most innocent smile at him.
“You wouldn’t have done it anyway would you?” he asks
“I only just met you, I can’t lick you when I don’t even know you” I shrug.
“I’m going to have to be more specific with the other two I can see”
“While you think of them I’m going to get another drink, when I come back I expect
to see you fully clothed” I call over my shoulder as I sit on a bar stool waiting to place
my order.
“What was that all about?” Matt asks slipping onto the stool next to me.
“I lost a bet” I glare at him “Don’t ask and I’m seriously going to kill you tomorrow,
do you have any idea how drunk I’m going to have to get just so I can get through the
next two things I have to do?”
“What have you got to do?” he asks grinning at me making me glare harder.
“I don’t even know yet!”
“Anyway Soph sent me over to ask if you’re going home with Andrew tonight”
“No!” I answer surprised that Sophie would even have to ask
“She said you’d say that so she wants to know if you want to stay in our room
tonight”
“Why?” I ask frowning at him confused.
“Umm … well” he doesn’t finish the sentence just gestures with his head to our
table, I look over and see Tucker whispering something in Mel’s ear making her giggle
and bite her bottom lip.
“Oh … I know her … or I used to anyway. He wouldn’t bring her back to the room
would he? I mean, he knows there’s only one bed”
“Can I have four shots of tequila, a jager bomb and a bottle of beer please?” I ask
the bartender as soon as he stands in front of me.
“I’m not sure but you can stay in our room just in case” Matt says frowning at the
drinks being placed in front of me “Who are they for?” he asks.
“Me” I say distractedly as I pay for the drinks.
“Brooke you are not going to drink all them and not be sick” he says unbelievably.
 I don’t reply. Surely Tucker wouldn’t bring someone back to a room knowing that
I’ll be in the bed too, first shot. He wouldn’t do anything with her after last night, this
morning and this afternoon, second shot. Although he is all over her and has been
since we got here, third shot. Maybe I didn’t drop my knickers quick enough, fourth
shot. He’s probably laughing at me for everything I told him about the dream and
stuff I wince and slam the now empty jager bomb glass down.
“No?” I ask Matt picking up my beer and taking a sip.
“Oh boy” is all he says and walks back to the table looking worried.
I shake my head at the mess that has quickly become my life tonight. I’ve lost a bet
and now have to do three embarrassing things that – thanks to the four shots and
jager bomb – quick thinking aren’t going to get me out of anymore, by a guy that I
used to be friends with and both my friends are attracted to. The guy that I care
about and am attracted to and have been intimate with, just a few hours ago is now
getting it on with a girl I also used to be friends with. Oh and I have to share a hotel
room with people who will be having sex no matter which room I stay in after I have
met my dead dads best friend. Great.
 Chapter Twelve

I wake up to an annoying song and thirty people hitting me in the head with
hammers. I throw the pillow over my head but the noise doesn’t stop. I reluctantly lift
my head off the pillow and search for the noise.
I find my phone on the floor next to the bed in my shoe.
“Hello?” I whisper into the phone.
“Where the hell are you” Sophie screams into the phone making me wince and
hold it away from my ear.
“Shh … Umm I’m not sure hold on” I whisper to her then look around the room, I’m
still in the hotel but my stuff isn’t here. “I’m in the hotel”
“Why are you whispering?” she asks not whispering.
“Head … hurts … dying” I groan and walk into the bathroom “oh fuck” I whisper as
I take in my appearance, I look like death.
“What? What’s oh fuck?” Sophie screeches in my ear.
“If you say anything above a whisper from now on, I am hanging up on you” I warn
in a whisper so it doesn’t have the desired effect.
“What room are you in Brooke?” she asks sounding worried now and talking a bit
quieter thankfully.
“I don’t know hold on” I tell her and head to the door to check the number on the
outside “four oh seven” I tell her.
“I’ll be there now”
“I’ll leave the door unlocked then because I’m getting in the shower” I say before
she hangs up.
I let the water wash over me and stand under it for much longer than I need to, I
don’t bother drying my hair when I get out but get dressed in the fresh clothes that
Sophie has left on the toilet for me. I can hear an argument so I put my ear on the
door and try to listen.
“What are you doing here?” “What do you mean what am I doing here, what is she
doing here?” “I don’t know I haven’t spoken to her far from getting this room number
yet” “Well why not?” “Where’s your friend?” “She went home” “I can’t believe you”
“Hey, at least I came home last night” “Will you two stop it”
I lower myself to the floor and put my head in my knees trying to think what
happened last night, I remember everything at the pub and getting to the club but
nothing after that. Someone knocks the door above my head.
“Yeah” I call not lifting my head
“Are you okay Brooke?” Katie asks softly.
“I’m not sure” I answer honestly.
“Can I come in?”
“Sure” I shift out of the way as she slides in and closes the door behind her. She
takes in my position on the floor and climbs down next to me.
“What happened last night?” she asks looking me over.
“I was hoping you could tell me” I whisper “I can remember as far as getting to the
club and that’s it” I groan.
“You were only with us until two o’ clock then you disappeared … with Andrew”
I groan and reach for my phone holding it to my ear once I’ve dialled his number.
“Morning” he says happily
“What the hell happened last night?” I ask not bothering to greet him back.
“You drank a truck load” he laughs and I hold the phone away from my ear until it
stops.
 “I can’t remember anything”
“You didn’t do anything stupid, you could only just walk when we got to the club so I
let you off the bet, you met Will and spent most of the night talking to him, you’re not
meeting him today now, you told him were going to sleep all day instead”
I groan at that “How did I get here?”
“You asked me for a room of your own so you wouldn’t have to watch a live porno.
We looked for your friends, well I did carrying you, we could only find the one that
was with Mel and you didn’t want to say goodbye to them, so I got a taxi back to the
hotel with you and got one of the barmaids to get you to your room. I left you in
reception”
“I’m so sorry and embarrassed. Really, I am sorry”
“It’s not a problem, I had fun. Next time your in town give me a call. I’d definitely
do it again, I haven’t laughed so much in ages” he chuckles.
“Will do” I grumble and hang up.
“Well?” Kate prompts
“He put me in a taxi, left me in reception and I got a new room, one of the
barmaids brought me here”
Her whole body visibly relaxes
“How mad are they?” I ask nodding towards the room that I’m sure now holds all
my friends.
“Pretty mad, Luke and I have been looking for you since nine this morning, Sophie
started this morning at four when Tucker woke her and Matt up because you wasn’t
in your room or answering your phone. It’s now three”
“Oh god, lets get this over with” I sigh and stand up.
Katie opens the door and I follow her out not looking at anyone, as soon as the
shouting starts I throw my hands over my ears.
“Where the hell have you been?” Matt.
“What the fuck were you thinking?” Tucker.
“Don’t you answer your phone?” Luke.
“I’ve been so worried!” Sophie.
“Please don’t shout” I beg pathetically.
“Damn right were going to shout” Tucker shouts.
“Well you know what. Screw you all, it’s all of your faults that I’m in this position
anyway!” I scream back at them.
“Oh really?” Tucker asks folding his arms over his chest and raising an eyebrow.
“You” I point to Sophie “Were begging me to have sex with him!”
“But…”
“You!” I point at Tucker “you ran off after lunch and ignored me for the whole
night; you have a problem with something, fucking speak up and tell me”
“And you two!” I turn my glare on Matt and Luke “If you two were man enough to
get you’re girlfriends yourself, instead of shoving me in front of some random guy,
then I wouldn’t have had to do it and be in this position now would I”
I turn to face al of them “Now if you have all finished shouting, I’m going home and
if any of you even think about lecturing or shouting at me once more I will get a train
home alone”
“No I’ll drive you with Sophie, the boys can go in Matt’s car” Kate says from behind
me.
“Fine” I nod and walk back to my original room to collect my things, wisely no one
follows me and I meet them in the hotel lobby.
“We’ll follow you” Katie tells Luke and we all separate into the separate cars.
 “Can we stop for coffee please?” I ask from my seat in the back.
“Of course” Kate smiles at me.
The car journey home is made in complete silence, Sophie falls asleep about ten
minutes in and I relieve Kate of driving duties after half hour when I noticed she was
struggling to keep her eyes open, which pretty much left me with just my thoughts to
keep me company.
An hour into the drive my phone starts ringing so I pull over to answer it without
checking who’s calling, the boys pull over ahead of me when they notice that I’ve
stopped.
“Hello”
“Hi Brooke, just wanted to check to see how you are today, it’s Will”
“Oh hi, I’m feeling quite bad actually; sorry I heard I was a bit drunk last night” I
wince imagining all the things that I could have done.
“Yeah just a little but you were fine, from what I heard you actually handled it quite
well” he’s laughing much to my relief “Will you be coming down again?”
“I’m not sure, I guess I will at some point but I have exams and things coming up so
it may not be for a while, I’ll definitely let you know though”
“Yeah, I’d like that” he sounds genuinely happy “Are you back home yet?”
The boys are making their way towards me now.
“No on the drive home, about an hour and half left”
“I’ll let you get back to it then, drive safe and say hey to your dad the next time you
visit him okay?”
“Sure, bye Will”
“Why did you stop?” Matt asks opening my door.
“Phone” I hold my phone up and rest my head on the steering wheel.
“How long have they been out?” Luke asks gesturing to the girls.
“Soph went out about ten minutes in and Kate couldn’t keep her eyes open ten
minutes later”
“Brooke, you can’t drive. You’re probably still drunk”
“Trust me I would not be feeling this bad if I was drunk” I grumble not bothering to
lift my head.
“I’d like to drive with Soph” Matt says from behind Luke.
“I was going to say I wanted to sit with Kate” Luke sighs and the three boys just
stare at each other.
“Well you two stay with your girls, I’ll drive Brooke back” Tucker grumbles
obviously not happy with the situation.
“Fine” I give in and climb out of the car.
“Want me to drive so you can sleep?” I ask wearily knowing he can’t have had any
sleep either.
“Nope, I said I’d drive you back so that’s what I’m going to do” he practically spits
the words at me.
“Fine” I grumble back and settle into the passenger seat.
This journey home is just as silent as the one I just left. Things between us are
awkward when I think to how we woke up yesterday morning and how we are now,
it’s like a whole world has changed. I have no idea what exactly happened but if I
could take it all back and cancel it out I would.
“How’s Andrew?” Tucker asks breaking the silence after about forty minutes, I look
over at him but he’s staring ahead.
“How’s Mel?” I counter to which he just nods his head once and the silence
descends on us once again.
We pull up in front of the dorms and I let out the breath I feel like I’ve been holding
for the last twenty minutes. I reach for the door handle but Tucker clear his throat, I
turn to look at him but, again he isn’t facing me.
“I slept with her” he says flatly.
I close my eyes and sit there for a moment, when I re-open them he’s still staring
straight ahead, shaking my head I get out of the car.
“Sorry I fell asleep on you” Sophie says climbing out of Luke car.
“It’s fine, it’s my fault you were up so early” I shrug and grab my bag from the
trunk.
“We’re going to JD’s, are you coming?” Luke calls to me from the driver side door
of his car.
“Nope” I grab my keys and head to my car “I have somewhere to be” I don’t look
back and settle into my car heading towards the graveyard to tell my dad about the
trip.
 Chapter Thirteen
When I get back to the dorm that night Sophie is sat at the kitchen table with her
laptop she looks up at my entrance.
“Hey, there’s food here for you, I saved you some just incase you didn’t get a
chance to eat”
“Thanks, but I’m going to grab something in a little”
I smile at her pouring myself a coffee from the fresh pot she’s made “Want one?”
“Thanks” I take the mug from her and then sit at the table opposite her.
“Was this weekend weird for you?”
“A little” I admit “It was strange as in there were something I could remember
some things clearly, others like Andrew for instance I remembered bits, which is how
I recognized him but then some things like Mel, I couldn’t remember her at all or Will
for that matter”
“I’m sure it will come back but you’ve spent so long making sure you don’t
remember them that you’ve buried them deep”
“I know, thanks for going with me though”
“No problem” she smiles but then frowns “It was weird between you and Tucker as
well what was that about?”
“I don’t know, I guess you and everyone else was right when you warned me about
him” I sigh rubbing my face with the palms of my hands.
“I’m sorry Brooke, Matt said that you took five shots when you found out about him
and Mel and I saw you look away when they did their body shots, you told him didn’t
you?”
“Yeah” I nod resting my head in my hands.
“Will you be okay?”
“I’m just sorry that we won’t be friends anymore” I admit looking up at her.
“You will” she looks determined but something in my expression makes her change
her mind “won’t you?”
“I don’t think so” I smile sadly at her.
“I’m sorry”
“It’s fine, everyone was surprised it lasted this long, it had to end sooner or later
right?” I smile at her.
Sophie goes to bed shortly after but I stay up for the first time ever, really trying to
remember my childhood, something I have never allowed myself to do before.

“Shit! Brooke!”
I snap my eyes open and lift my head up, Sophie is shaking me.
“What is it? What’s wrong?” I ask looking around for danger.
“Are you okay?” she asks searching my eyes.
“I’m fine why?
“You were screaming and hitting the table” she says slowly.
“Sorry for waking you” I grumble standing up and stretching.
“It’s fine, I thought you were going to hurt yourself”
“I’m going to go out for a bit, get some fresh air, if I don’t see you in the morning
I’ll see you at lunch okay?”
“Sure” she says before I close the door after me.
Once I’m in my car I take a deep breath and rest my head on the steering wheel. I
don’t remember the nightmare but I know it was a bad one because I’m shaking. I
know from experience that there are only two things that will enable me to get back
to sleep one is having Tucker stay with me and the other is to get so drunk that I pass
out. Tucker isn’t an option so I start my car and head to the all nigh bar that isn’t far
from here.

“Hey Luke” I say into the phone as soon as he answers.

“Whoa, why are you shouting?” he asks me, I didn’t realize I was.
“I’m not!”
“Where are you?” he asks me quietly.
“Why are you whispering?” I whisper back giggling slightly.
“Oh my god” I hear him groan and then I can hear voices in the background.
“Are you with Sophie? Let me talk to her” I demand
“Sophiiieeee” I sing into the phone
“Brooke?”
“Yeap” I hiccup “Come party”
“Who are you with?” she asks laughing
“The band, Dave found me last night … this morning … at the bar and brought me
to Jacks house party, are you coming?”
“I’ll see you all tomorrow” I hear her say away from the phone and then hear keys
jangling about “I’m on my way” she laughs and hangs up.

“Sophie’s here!” I scream and run up to give her a hug but I’m stopped by
someone lifting me up in the air and spinning me around.
“It’s your turn!” Dave shouts carrying me back to the table, Sophie follows
laughing.
“What are we doing?” Sophie asks taking the seat next to me at the table.
“We are playing ‘Liar’ you have to say something about yourself it can be true or
false but if someone catches you out on a lie then you have to take a shot, if anyone
says you’re lying when your telling the truth they have to take a shot” I explain
handing her a shot.
“I can do the splits” I announce and grin when no one at the table calls me on it.
“Liar” Sophie declares looking smug.
“Fuck” I mutter and throw my shot back.
“I’ve had a boob job” she smirks.
“Liar!” both Dave and Jack shout at the same time and she takes her shot.
The game continues and Sophie looses badly not able to call anyone out on a lie
but me and being caught in them herself.
“How are we getting home?” I ask Sophie hiccupping.
“I have no idea, ring Matt” she laughs dancing on the coffee table as Dave sings
one of the bands songs.
I squint at the phone and dial Matt.
“Hello”
I frown at the phone to make sure I dialed the right number. “Uh.. is Matt there
please?” I ask but laugh as my s’s sound more like sh’s and Sophie starts cheering
when Jack joins her on the table.
“Brooke?” Tucker asks.
“Can I speak to Matt” I ask again slowly this time.
“I thought you were calling Matt, who has his phone?” Sophie shouts over to me.
“Oooh lover boy’s playing away, want us to kick his ass?” Jack says loud enough to
be heard on the phone.
“Who’s that?” I hear in my ear.
 “Jesus” I rub my forehead trying to work out who to answer first.
“Brooke have you got my boxers?” Dave calls out from the kitchen and I cant help
but laughing at that.
“Yeah she’s wearing them” Sophie calls back laughing after checking my outfit.
“I won them fair and square buddy!” I shout.
“Brooke” He’s shouting at me now.
“What?” I snap into the phone not happy with him shouting at me.
“Where the hell are you?”
“Can I speak to Matt please, we need to be picked up”
“Hello?” Matt is finally on the phone.
“At last! Sophie asked me to ask you if you could pick us up please, we can’t drive”
“Sure where are you and what about your cars?” he asks.
“Umm hold on” I say into the phone “What about our cars Soph, mines still over at
the bar?” I call across the room.
“I’ll give you a lift to yours tomorrow Brooke and then you can drive Soph to hers”
Jack says and Sophie cheers and hi-fives him.
“We got it covered” I say into the phone.
“Who is that?” Matt demands.
“Why don’t you both stay here and then Sophie can drive you to your car?” Dave
calls from the kitchen.
“Where the fuck are you Brooke?” Matt shouts through the phone.
“Umm Jack’s house, I’ll text you the address now” I say then hang up before he can
shout at me anymore. I send him the address then give Sophie her phone back.
“You’re in trouble” I sing tauntingly at her.
“Who cares” she rolls her eyes then pulls me up on the coffee table to dance with
her, the guys all surround us and start spraying us with champagne so we start
singing a drunken version of ‘it’s raining men’ The doorbell rings and we all fall silent
a freeze one of the guys open the door and we all watch as Matt and Tucker take a
step forward but they also freeze as they take in the scene in front of them.
There are bottles and glasses on every surface, Furniture has been moved around
and rearrange randomly, four guys are stood around the coffee table holding empty
champagne bottles and me and Sophie are stood on that coffee table with our hands
still above our heads, soaking wet. Sophie has someone’s top on over her dress and
I’ve lost my top but now am wearing a tea towel as a boob tube which Sophie
fastened at the back with a safety pin and a pair of yellow boxers over my own
underwear.
“Looks like we missed one hell of a party” Tucker notes quietly but it’s so silent we
all hear him. His voice seems to bring us all back to the moment and everyone starts
moving away and the party starts back up as if it was never interrupted.
Matt and Tucker help us down from the table and grabbing our arms drag us out to
Matt’s car. He puts a towel down on the back seat and sits us both in there, we spend
the whole car journey home giggling and singing, the boys don’t say anything to us
but are talking quietly to each other. They drop us off in our dorm and leave just
before we both collapse and pass out on Sophie’s bed.

“Broke, your phone” Sophie says from somewhere in the room.

“Make it stop” I all but cry.
“Answer it” she calls back I lift my head off the pillow to see her sat at the kitchen
table with Matt.
“Hello” I say weakly into the phone that I swear I’m going to throw in the bin.
“Feeling like death Brooke?” Someone laughs into the phone.
 “Do I know you?” I ask the voice
“Yes we met yesterday, you were a little drunk but we got to know each other quite
well actually if you know what I mean”
I shoot up of the bed “What?” I screech into the phone horrified.
“Brooke, we had sex yesterday” the voice says calmly to me
“No … no … no …” I hang up the phone and throw it on to my bed where it starts
ringing again.
“What was that about?” Sophie asks looking no better than I feel.
“I have no idea who that was, they didn’t even tell me their name but he said I had
sex with him yesterday” I walk over to join them at the table.
“Aren’t you going to answer it?” Matt asks when my phone starts ringing loudly
again.
“No, make it go away” I wince at the sound of my voice. “Uh … Soph what are you
wearing?” I frown at the top she’s wearing that has ‘tits, pussy, ass … who cares as
long as it’s in my mouth’ written across her chest.
“Trust me yours is no better” Matt says dryly averting his eyes. I look down and I
have a tea towel across my chest that isn’t quite covering what it should be and a
pair of yellow sponge bob boxers on.
“Oh my god” I whisper and Sophie just nods at me removing her top so I can put it
on, thankfully she still has her dress her underneath it. “Please can you answer it?” I
beg Matt, rolling his eyes he gets my phone from the bed and answers it.
“I can remember almost everything apart from having sex, I think I would
remember that” I whisper to Sophie who nods at me and then winces.
“It’s for you” Matt says looking amused holding the phone out to me.
“You were supposed to get rid of them” I glare at him. “Hello” I grumble into the
phone when he starts laughing.
“Hey Brooke, I take it you didn’t think my joke was funny”
“Dave I could fucking kill you” I scream when I hear him laughing in my ear.
“Sophie’s cars gone, did you get yours back too?” he asks still laughing but quietly
now.
“Soph, your cars gone” I tell her frowning, she doesn’t look like she could have
driven it.
“Me and Tucker got both your cars this morning” Matt tells us when she looks
worried.
“Yeah we got them both back” I say into the phone to Dave.
“Okay, cool I just wanted to check”
“How are you so happy? I feel like I’ve been hit by a bus” I pout even though he
can’t see it through the phone.
“Easy I have to pick Dave up from school in an hour, I have no choice” he laughs
obviously not feeling the effects of last night like I am.
“Well have fun” I mutter back making him laugh harder.
“I’ll talk to you later” he hangs up on me and I throw my head down on the table.
“Remind me why I decided to go on a twenty four hour booze binge” I beg the
table.
“That would be because you couldn’t sleep” Sophie reminds me patting my
shoulder.
“Oh yeah … Tucker” I growl his name.
“What about Tucker?” Matt asks and when I look up he’s frowning at both of us.
“Nothing” I shrug and shoot Sophie a shut-up look.
“Oh … he’s coming over here soon” Matt looks at us both when we both frown at
him obviously not understanding.
“Why?” Sophie asks him.
“Why wouldn’t he? He’s always over here” he frowns back at her.
“I cannot deal with this right now” I announce and walk into the bathroom ignoring
their whispering.
“Brooke, you really are an idiot” I mutter to the bathroom lowering myself into the
hot bubble bath.
“Oh my god” I moan aloud and then freeze when I hear Matt choking on something
and Sophie laughing.
“You okay in there Brooke?” Sophie calls laughing.
“Yeah I think I’m going to sleep in here from now on” I call back smiling to myself,
maybe this is how I cure my nightmares, get myself relaxed enough and I’ll just drift
off.
When I get out of the bath something catches my eye in my mirror, without
thinking about it I grab my robe, after I have slipped it on I run out of the bathroom
and grab my phone ignoring Sophie, Matt and Tucker that are all watching me as if
I’m crazy.
“You bastard!” I snap into the phone as soon as Dave answers.
“Let me guess, you fond them” He laughs back.
“How could you let me do that?” I demand so beyond angry now.
“You wouldn’t listen to me, It was quite amusing, how do you think you lost your
jeans in the first place?”
I hang up the phone, pissed off and embarrassed.
“What’s happened?” Matt asks watching me looking slightly worried.
“Well I guess I know now how I lost my clothes. Soph?” I ask and gesture for her to
come and see.
She walks over to me slowly and I turn my back to the boys. I ignore her frowning
at me and open my robe turning slightly to the side.
“You got a tattoo!” she screams at me.
I snap my robe shut and throw my hand over her mouth but it’s too late.
“Yeah laugh it up” I shout at al three of them who are laughing so loud I’m not sure
they heard me.
I walk back to the bathroom and slam the door behind me.
A few minutes later there a knock on the door.
“I’m sorry Brooke, let me take a look please” Sophie calls through the door.
I open the door and glare at Matt who is still laughing, wiping his eyes.
“Come on” Sophie encourages moving so I can hide it from the boys again.
“What is it?” I ask closing my eyes not sure I want to see what it is.
“It’s actually really cute” she tells me and takes a photo of it on her phone.
“Huh” Looking at the picture I relax completely. It is kind of cute. I have a little pink
bow about two inches big tattooed on me, the only downside is that it’s right at the
top of my backside.
“Can we see?” Tuckers asks getting up from the table.
“Give me a minute” I say before he gets any closer hen grab some clothes. Once I
have changed in the bathroom I walk back into the room and stand in front of them
where they are sat on the sofa.
“Well?” Tucker asks.
I turn around and lift my top up with one hand, with the other I lower my jeans
slightly.
None of them say anything so after a few minutes I turn around to face them they
still have their eyes in the same position so I clap my hands because they are no
longer staring at my backside.
“Say something?” I tell them.
“That’s sexy as hell” Tucker says finally looking up at me, Matt nods and turns to
Sophie but she just shakes her head at him laughing.
Something Dave said earlier makes me stop. I’m pretty sure he asked if I found
them and as far as I know I only have one tattoo.
“What’s wrong?” Sophie asks noticing my expression.
“There’s more” I frown to myself.
“Where?” Tucker asks lifting my top higher.
“I don’t know” I shrug and turn to the bathroom “Soph I need you to help me
search” I call over my shoulder.
“I’ll do it” Tucker offers standing up and closing the bathroom door on Sophie and
Matt laughing.
After a thorough check by myself and Tucker we haven’t found any more I slump
down on the floor trying to remember if I did anything else last night, flickers of the
tattoo parlor come back to me and I remember seeing that they also did piercing. We
didn’t find anything pierce either and there is only one place that we haven’t
checked, but I wouldn’t do that, would I?
“Oh no” I groan as I remember the conversation that Jack and I was having about
an exgirlfriend’s of his who had her clit pierced.
“What’s wrong?” Tucker asks when I stand up again.
I shake my head at him and return to the room headed straight for Sophie. I pull
her up and take her into the kitchen area away from Matt and Tucker.
“I need something removed” I whisper to her when I’m sure I have her full
attention.
“What?” she frowns at me.
“I had something pierced last night, can you take me to the emergency room to
get it un-pierced?” I ask
“Brooke you can’t go to the hospital to have a piercing taken out” she tell me not
whispering like I am.
“Then what the hell am I supposed to do? I want it gone”
“You’ll have to do it yourself or get someone to do it for you”
“What now?” Matt asks looking at Tucker who just shrugs.
“Soph ….”
“Where is it?” she asks rolling her eyes at me.
“Ummm…” I move my eyes down to the ground hoping she picks up on it.
“Nuh uh, no way Brooke, get someone else to do it, that’s too weird” she shakes
her head at me laughing.
“Can we see?” Matt asks
Sophie shakes her head at him still laughing.
“Can’t you take a photo and show us?” Tucker asks and Sophie just laughs even
harder.
“I haven’t even seen it” I tell them both over Sophie.
“Soph, why are you laughing what is it?” Matt asks her looking confused.
“She’s laughing because I’m a virgin who has her fucking clit pierced” I snap at
them both.
“Oh” Is all he says and Tucker just sits there staring at me open-mouthed.
“You’re a virgin?” he asks finally.
“You already know this, I kind of have other things on my mind right now” I say
dismissively.
 “But you and Andrew…” he trails of frowning at me.
“Umm are friends, I told him I had a boyfriend so he wouldn’t try anything on with
me”
“But Sophie said…” he turns to look at Sophie.
“Don’t look at me like that! You would have done it anyway” she tells him but I
have no idea what they are talking about and by the look on his face, neither does
Matt.
“I have a little situation here” I call to them.
“Shit Soph!” Tucker shouts and walks out of the dorm.
“What was that all about?” Matt asks her from the sofa.
“I told him Brooke had sex with Andrew”
“What?” I ask turning to look at her now.
“I knew something was going on between you both when we were in the hotel so
when we were all in the bar and you were talking to Andrew I told him he would have
the room to himself that night because you were going back to Andrews” she says
quietly.
“Why would you do that?” Matt asks her
“Because he would have done something to hurt her eventually, I wanted her to
get out before she had her heart broken” she snaps at him but is looking at me.
“That wasn’t for you to do!” he snaps back and leaves the room.
“So that’s why… him and Mel… it was you” I whisper.
“Brooke, I’m so sorry, I was only trying to help”
“Yeah and now I have a tattoo, a piercing and a best friend that won’t talk to me” I
snap at her then leave her in the dorm alone.
 Chapter Fifteen

“What does daddy think of the tattoo?” I don’t bother looking behind me when I
hear Beth’s voice instead I turn my glare on Tucker.
“Really?” I don’t bother trying to keep the disgust out of my voice.
“I heard it basically offers up your ass as a gift” comes from behind me again.
“Been spreading your legs again Beth?” I ask her but still looking at Tucker.
“Jealous because I got further than you?” she whispers in me ear taking me by
surprise.
Narrowing my eyes at Tucker I finally stand up and face her.
“What else did he tell you this time?” I ask her ignoring the few students that are
staring at us.
“Brooke” Sophie warns but I ignore her and pull my hand out of her grip when she
attempts to pull me back into my seat.
“A few interesting things really, nightmares, trips to towns trying to make you
remember your poor dead daddy, how busy you get with your mouth, house parties
that you get so drunk that you can’t remember getting a tattoo…”
“Does it not bother you that after sex all you two can think to talk about it me?”
“See, I’m having a little trouble here because if I remember correctly you were the
one who said I could only feel something if I had a dick inside me, but yet it would
appear you can’t feel anything at all”
“Walk away Beth” Matt says from the table.
“No, I think I’ll stay for a bit longer” she shakes her head at him then looks over to
Tucker and back at me with a smirk. “There is no wonder you’re step dad hits you, I
would if you were my daughter, can’t you see that you’re an embarrassment? I’d be
ashamed of you, I feel sorry for you’re mum. You’re dad’s lucky he’s dead so he
doesn’t have to witness what a fuck up you turned out to be”
I can hear Sophie’s chair scraping across the floor as she jumps up out of her seat
but she doesn’t get to do whatever it was she was going to do before she can move
Beth is on the floor under me and I’m punching her in the face. She twists and throws
me off her then we are flipped and she’s on top of me.
“I learnt that trick while I was having sex, you wouldn’t know anything about that
though would you” she sneers at me before landing a punch on my jaw.
“Yeah, well I didn’t have to spread my legs to learn this one” I snap back at her, I
use all my strength to lift her off me a little and then slam my knees up into her back
making her fly forward she curls up into the fetal position on the floor and I grab a fist
full of her hair.
A few people are surrounding us chanting fight and random other things.
I twist my fist into her hair and bring her ear up to my mouth. “Say what you want
about me, do what the hell you want to me but mention my dad again and I swear to
god I will fucking kill you” I whisper into her ear and then slam her face into the floor.
Matt pulls me up from the ground and drags my arms behind my back, Beth turns
to look at me and smiles, her mouth covered in blood.
“If he was anything like you are, you’re mum’s lucky he’s dead too” she spits a
mouthful of blood on the floor.
I try to get my arms from behind my back but Matt tightens his hold on them and
someone lifts Beth up off the floor holding her in the same vice type grip that I’m in. I
take advantage of Matt’s strength and without him realizing what I’m doing I lean my
weight against him and push both my feet off the ground making them slam into
Beth’s stomach, both her and the person holding her stumble back and land on the
floor. Matt lets me go, out of shock I suspect so I walk forward until I’m standing over
her.
“You want to fight and come out on top? Pick someone who doesn’t put up with this
shit everyday”
Sophie pulls me away from the group and sits me back down at the table, she
starts wiping my lip that’s bleeding but I push her hand away and try to slow my
breathing down.
“God I hate that bitch” I whisper drinking my coffee, most of the people in the café
have gone back to what they were doing before me and Beth went a bit a crazy but a
few people are still staring at us.
“I don’t think you’re her favorite person either” She whispers back “What are you
going to do about him?” I follow the direction of where she’s nodding until my eyes
find Matt and Tucker, it looks like their arguing.
“Right now, I’d like to do to him what I did to Beth”
“He’d deserve it” she shrugs.
“I’m gonna go, I’ll see you later” I tell her when Tucker and Matt start walking back
to the table. I pass them but don’t say anything as I head to my next class.
To my surprise Tucker sits in the seat next to me, he normally sits in this seat by
why on earth he would think I want to sit next to him I don’t know.
“Brooke” he starts but is cut off by the lecture starting.
I sigh relieved but he slips a piece of paper onto my desk.
I’m sorry
I shake my head at him and scribble a note back.
Do you honestly hate me so much that you will go out of your way to upset me?
No, of course not. Will you let me explain?
No, I don’t want to hear anything you have to say, but do one thing for me. Next
time you have to stick your dick in something, try to not talk about me afterwards
please.
I pass him the note and plug my iPod in hoping he gets the hint that I don’t want to
talk to him.

I wake up for the third time tonight and with all the exhaustion, memories and the
fight in the café this afternoon fresh in my mind I give in and don’t fight the tears but
it’s not soft sobs and sniffles but full on howling crying. I grab my keys, not bothering
to get changed out of my shorts and tank and leave the dorm. I bump into Ethan,
Tucker, and Matt on the stairs they all stop to stare at me. I try to push passed them
but Matt grabs my arm stopping me.
“Where are you going?”
I shrug and swipe my hands over my cheeks.
“Where’s Sophie?” he asks
I shrug again.
“Brooke, talk to me” he grabs my other arm and starts shaking me slightly but I
just stare at him.
“Brooke” he’s begging now but all I can do is shake my head at him. The ability to
speak is lost on me, I open my mouth but no words come out.
I try walking away but he doesn’t let me go, I frown up at him because he looks
lost, I lift my hand to touch his face but I drop my keys on the floor. Tucker picks
them up and stares at me.
“You were going to go out?” he asks looking at what I’m wearing.
“What’s wrong with her?” I turn at the sound of Ethan’s worried voice.
They start having a conversation around me and I follow each voice with my head.
“I don’t know, we should take her back to her room”
“We can’t leave her like this”
 “Where’s Sophie?”
“I think she stayed in someone else’s room, she has an exam in the morning and
couldn’t afford to loose anymore sleep”
“Where was she going to go?”
“Should we let her go and find out?”
“She can’t talk and you want to let her drive?”
“Let’s take her back to her room, I’ll stay with her”
“I don’t think she will be happy to wake up and find you in her room”
“Well she hasn’t got a choice, at least if I’m there she will get some sleep”
“If she hits you tomorrow, don’t say I didn’t warn you”
“Fine”
“Brooke, come on. It’s time to go back to bed” Matt tell me steering me towards
my room.
“I’ll see you guys tomorrow” Tucker says when Matt and Ethan leave the dorm.
“Brooke don’t you want to go to sleep?” Tucker asks, joining me on the sofa, I don’t
answer him I just start flicking through the channels on the TV.
When I can’t find anything to watch I turn the TV off and we are sent into darkness.
“Do you think she was right?” I ask, finally finding my voice.
“Who?” Tucker asks sounding relieved.
“She said my dad would be ashamed of me, was she right?”
“Brooke, please don’t believe her or anyone else who says that to you. He would be
so proud of you it’s unreal. You’re the most beautiful, bravest, strongest, funniest,
smartest most loyal person I know, how could anyone be ashamed of you?”
“I just want it to end” I whisper, knowing her can hear me “The nightmares, the
fights, the rumors, the crying, the memories, the lies I want it all to end”
“Where were you going tonight Brooke?” he asks moving closer to me.
“I don’t know, I want to go home but I don’t have one”
“This is all my fault, I’m sorry Brooke, will you let me explain my self to you not
please?”
“It’s not your fault, I don’t care why you did whatever you did, none of it matters”
“That’s not true at least let me talk to you about it, because to me it does matter”
“Okay”
“When Sophie told me you were going back to Andrews room I felt sick, I know I
shouldn’t have believed her but I did and then what I did with Mel, you must of hated
me for it. When I found out nothing happened between you and him that Sophie lied
to me I don’t know what happened I felt so horrible and I went out, got drunk and
ended up with Beth, we got talking and she was asking about you. I know I shouldn’t
have told her anything about you at all but I hurt you and I promised myself and you
that I would never do that again after the last time but I did and I felt worthless for it,
when she kissed me I felt like that was all I deserved is to be wanted by someone like
her, I could never deserve someone like you Brooke, your worth so much more than
me. That’s why I did it”
I nod into the darkness taking in everything he just told me.
“Are you going to hit me now?” I hear him asks from beside me.
“No, why would I hit you?” I turn towards where his voice is coming from.
“The same reason you hit Beth”
“I didn’t hit her because of that; I hit her because she said my dad was lucky he is
dead. I didn’t get upset over what you did, how can I? Everyone I have ever known
has hurt me at some point why should I expect you to be any different? It’s not fair
for me to rank you higher than everyone else”
 “Brooke, I want to be with you like I have never been with anyone else before but
I’m worried”
“What are you worried about?”
I hear him take a deep breath and brace myself for the worst “I’m worried that I
don’t deserve you, I worried that I can’t be enough for you”
“The fact that you’re worried about it tells me that you do and you can” I whisper
to him.
“I need you to tell me what I can do to be good enough for you” he whispers sitting
so close that we are touching now.
I reach around in the dark until I find his hand, I hold it in both of mine. “You can
cheat on me, you can hit me, you can use me, you can steal from me and you can let
me down and never be there for me but please, whatever you do, don’t ever lie to
me. That’s the only thing that you can do to hurt me”
“I would never do any of those things to you anyway Brooke, I can promise you
that but I do have one other thing that is worrying me”
“What?”
“When you went out tonight, you wouldn’t talk to anyone, you had no shoes on, you
were only half dressed, you said you wanted it to end. Please be honest with me, was
it your life you wanted to put an end to?”
I can feel his whole body tense up as he waits for my answer and my heart breaks
a little with the knowledge that the people closest to me are worried that I could do
that to myself at anytime.
“No, you have to understand that even though I’m not afraid of dying, we all have
to go at some point. If it happens sooner rather than later for me, that’s okay. I’m not
even that bothered how it happens but I will never, ever try to end my life myself and
I would never ever let my step dad do it for me either. That’s the reason I can keep
going, it’s the only reason I carry on everyday and am still here. I just don’t want him
to control that part of me. My dad’s life got cut short; no one can force me to do the
same with my own. That reason alone is enough for me. So you have nothing to
worry about.”
 Chapter Sixteen
I sit on top of Tucker to straddle him but he still manages to trap me instead by
pinning my hands above his head.
“Aww come one I’m starving” I giggle as he playfully nips my collar bone.
“It’s three in the morning” he says tilting his head so he can kiss my neck.
“Mmm … but I’m hungry” I protest feebly and tilt my head to give him better
access.
“Me too” he agrees but nibbles on my ear making me squeal.
I struggle to get out of his grip but end up toppling us out of bed.
“What are you two doing?” Ethan asks amused sitting up in his bed.
“I’m going out for food” I announce standing up and taking advantage of Tuckers
winded position on the floor from where I landed on his stomach.
“Fine” Tucker grumbles getting up and slipping some jeans on.
“If you drive, I’ll make it up to you, on the way” I wink at him and he doubles his
efforts at getting dressed.
“See ya” he calls out to Ethan, grabbing his keys and me then a jacket.
“I’m not even dressed” I protest laughing.
“That’s what the jacket is for” he rolls his eyes and slings the jacket over my
shoulders zipping it up before we get any further into the corridor.

“Keep your eyes on the road” I shout for the third time “Are you sure you can
handle this?” I tease lowering my head into his lap to continue running my tongue
along the length of him, his only answer is a loud groan.
“Oh … shit … Brooke I’m gonna…” I feel the car jerk forward as his foot slams on
the accelerator.
“Mmm hmm” I nod at him but keep him in my mouth and swallow as he fills my
mouth, I keep him in my mouth until I’m sure there’s nothing left then clamp my
hand around the bottom of him and squeeze pushing my hand up to lick the last drop
away dipping the tip of my tongue in the little slit.
“You know if you’re going to swear at me every time I do that I might stop doing it”
I tell him trying to keep my expression blank.
“That’s not even funny Brooke, don’t joke about that stuff” he says looking too
serious.
“Ooh look we’re nearly there!” I sigh and fall back into my chair waving my hand at
the lit up all night pancake house.
“How do you even know about this place?”
“Me and Sophie used to go out in the middle of the night all the time, I also now
some all nigh bars, coffee houses, one stop shops.” I frown at the incredulity in his
tone.
“Why?”
I just shrug as he pulls up in front of my haven and jump out not wanting to wait for
him.
“Hi” I grin at the waitress.
“What can I get you Brooke?” she smiles back – I know it’s probably bad when the
waitresses know you by name but at this moment I don’t care to dwell on it.
“I’ll have two coffee’s and two house specials please” I hand her the money and
settle into a table by the window slipping my shoes off because I have no socks on
with them thanks to our hasty exit and it’s starting to get uncomfortable. Tucker
comes through the door looking around at everyone happily eating their meals as if
he has stepped into the twilight zone.
“Oh no, you sit over there” I point to the seat opposite when he starts to slide in
next to me.
“Why?” he asks but does it anyway.
“Because you are way to distracting when you sit next to me and I want to
remember my food, that’s what got us here in the first place, I forgot to each my
lunch remember and we skipped dinner”
“Oh yeah” he grins at me “What are you having?” he asks me picking up a menu.
“I’ve already sorted it, you took a long time getting out of the car” I smirk at him.
“Well some of us don’t just jump out of moving vehicles and I had to um, rearrange
my clothes” he smirks back at me but it quickly falls off his face when a plate
overflowing with food is put in front of him.
“No Sophie tonight?” the waitress asks eyeing Tucker who is looking at his plate as
if it’s going to bite him.
“No, although she is definitely more fun” I grumble and pick my knife and fork up
to cut into my stack of pancakes.
“What is this?” Tucker asks prodding his food.
“It’s only six pancakes, bacon and syrup” I roll my eyes at him.
“You know for someone who eats so much those clothes you used to wear should
fit you snugly” he grumbles.
“Yeah well luckily no matter what I eat what ever I don’t burn off in the gym just
goes on my boobs and ass, are you complaining?” I ask raising an eyebrow at him.
“Hell no, I’m just saying, some of us can’t eat like this, I’m going to be huge by the
time you’re finished with me” he grins back.
“That’s my plan” I tell him around a mouthful of pancakes not able to hold back
any longer.
“What to make me fat?”
“No to make you so fat that the next time you try to stop me going out for food in
the middle of the night, I can escape after I’ve knocked us both off the bed onto the
floor because you won’t be able to get back up by yourself”
“You haven’t thought it through, what if I landed on you? I’d squash you” he asks
rolling his eyes when I moan.
“That’s easy only you will fall off the bed”
“How?”
“I’ll distract you just as we’re about to fall so you’ll let me go”
“And how are you going to do that?”
“Easy” I look around to make sure no one can see me which is the case because I
have my back to everyone else and unzip the front of my jacket that thanks to Tucker
I only have a bra on underneath it.
“Okay, I see your point but just leave it like that for me please” he asks picking his
fork up and finally eating his food but not taking his eyes off my chest.
“What ever gets you to eat bud” I shrug and laugh as he moans when my breasts
jump with the movement.
I finish my food and watch Tucker, noticing that he is wolfing his down “If this is all
it takes to get you to eat like this maybe we should start going to hooters” I note.
“Umm ... does the rest of the service come with it?” he asks grinning at me.
“What” I frown at him.
“You don’t even know you’re doing it do you?” he asks chuckling now and points
under the table where I have been mindlessly running my foot under his jeans up and
down his leg.
 “Sorry” I pull my foot away guiltily.
“Come on let’s pay and get out of here” he says draining his cup.
I slip my shoes back on “I’ve already paid”
“Brooke” he groans
“You can pay next time” I answer smiling
“There’s going to be a next time?” he grumbles
“Definitely lots of next times” I answer cheerily.

***

“Brooke why do you look so happy but Tucker looks sick?” Sophie asks taking in our
position at the table.
I’m happily scooping up some lasagne and waving in front of Tucker laughing as he
recoils away from it but still keeping one arm around me.
“Poor Tucker can handle his drink , but he can’t handle his food” I poke my tongue
out at him but don’t manage to move away fast enough when he catches it between
his teeth.
“She dragged me out at three this morning for pancakes” He tells her laughing at
me checking my tongue to see if it’s bleeding.
“What, why didn’t you come and get me?” Sophie demands.
“I was very hungry. Sorry” I shrug and laugh because Tucker is sending her a look
that he is seriously questioning her sanity.
“Tucker I want her back! I don’t have any fun anymore” she pouts at Matt “Make
him give me my friend back” she demands pointing at Tucker as if she wants Matt to
put a hit out on him or something.
“Baby we have fun” Matt says offended.
“No we don’t, Brooke you’re staying with me tonight”
“Can’t sorry Soph, we had next to no sleep last night. Early night for us tonight”
Tucker winks at pulling me closer and kissing my forehead.

***

When I get out of the shower Tucker is sat on my bed.

“Hey, you’re early” I throw my hair towel on the sofa and take my place next to
him on the bed.
“I’m not, you just can’t tell the time” He teases “what do you want to do?”
“Umm watch a DVD?” I call over my shoulder and head back into the bathroom to
change into my robe.
“Uhh .. Brooke, what’s this?” Tucker calls out, he sounds nervous and I freeze when
I hear moaning.
“Shit, not that DVD player!” I call running back into the room and standing front of
the TV.
“What is it… wait .. is that yours?” he asks watching me closely and walking
towards me.
“Umm … no?” I ask and can feel myself turning red and unintentionally noticing
that he has stripped down to his boxers.
“It is yours isn’t it” he’s grinning now enjoying my discomfort.
“Can we not talk about this?” I beg
“Can we watch it?” he counters
“How about you borrow it and watch it in your own room?” I ask glaring at him.
 The sounds from the movie distract him and I take advantage of it to grab to DVD
out of the player.
“Brooke ... I was watching that” he pouts at me
“Tough” I grin at him and hold the DVD above my head out of reach.
“You do realise your shorter than me” he notes dryly.
“Shit” I mutter to myself but cry out when he flings me over his shoulder and drops
me on to the bed landing on top of me. “Can you not throw me around like a rag doll
please?” I ask but it falls on deaf ears.
“What is it about lesbians that turn you on exactly?” Tucker asks quietly untying my
robe.
“I like watching their mouths, lesbian porn has more mouth action than regular
porn” I tell him completely distracted by his fingers trailing softly all over my body.
“Hmmm” he mumbles and then runs his tongue along the inside of my wrist, I
moan and he sends me a knowing look.
“You cannot be serious” he says as if to himself and then does it again chucking at
my moan. “This could get interesting” he smirks at me and then settles himself on
the bed getting comfortable, I watch amazed as he runs his lips and tongue over
every inch of my body.
When his lips finally close on my swollen clit it becomes to much to watch, I’m
withering on the bed moaning and twisting the blankets in my hands, his tongue dips
inside me and then circles my clit softly.
“More, I need more” I manage to get out between moans.
“I know baby it’s coming” he says holding my legs still and sucking a bit harder.
“No, I mean I need more” I can hear the demand in my voice and he does too
because he stops and looks up at me.
“Now?” he asks checking my expression.
I nod up at him “Now” I whisper.
“Brooke” he runs his hands through his hair and then looks back at me his eyes
travelling up my body until they stop at my eyes “I don’t have…”
“Top drawer” I cut him off pointing to my chest of drawers next to the bed and I’m
secretly pleased that he doesn’t carry around condoms as if he expects it to happen.
“You’re sure?” he checks
“Positive” I answer watching him slide the condom on and settle above me.
The kiss takes me by surprise, not because I wasn’t expecting it but because it has
a whole new sensuality to it than any other kiss I have ever had, I shiver as he runs
his hand lightly down my body just skimming the skin and settles between my legs to
cup me, we both groan as one of his fingers slides easily into me
“God, you’re so ready” he whispers pulling away from the kiss, I turn my head to
the side and close my eyes when he positions his head at my entrance but he freezes
“Brooke, look at me, I need to know you want this”
I lift my chin and look him directly in the eyes trying to convey all the trust that I
have in him, it must work because he slowly slides into me, just when I’m thinking this
isn’t so bad, he thrusts all the way in, I bite my lip to stop from crying out but he
distracts me with a deep kiss. When he pulls away I’m overtaken by the sensation of
him moving inside me, I watch amazed at the expression on his face. Blue eyes
blazing half closed, eye brows slightly pulled in, his mouth half open forming an ‘oh’
and when he runs his tongue across his lower lip something inside me tightens and he
groans throwing his head on the pillow next to my face.
Now I’m adapted to his rhythm I wrap my legs around his back and bring my hips
up to meet him thrust for thrust. I can feel my orgasm moving inside me and the
feeling intensifies as Tucker shifts slightly, his lips close around my neck and he sucks
softly. I instinctively tense around him and start to shake as the orgasm builds higher,
he pulls his head up but I push his mouth back onto my neck, obeying my silent
request he sucks my neck again I moan and tense but when he nibbles softly then
runs his tongue along the patch of skin just below my ear I can’t hold back any
longer. He follows a few seconds later and I feel his whole body stiffen as he finds his
own release.
“Fuck…” Tucker groans collapsing on the bed next to me.
“Was that a good fuck or a bad fuck” I ask but then wince when I realise what I’ve
just said, he just snorts “You know what I mean” I nudge him with my elbow.
“How are you feeling?” He asks leaning up onto one elbow and looking at me
intently.
“Truthfully? Like I’m glad I waited” I tell him honestly and watch as the most
breathtaking smile breaks out on his face.
“Me too”
We spend the rest of the afternoon in bed until Tucker gets called away to help
Matt with something. A few hours later my phone rings. When I see Phin’s name light
up the screen I grab my jacket and head out, calling Tucker on my way.
 Chapter Seventeen
The first thing I notice when I walk into the café is silence the second thing is that
all eyes are on me once again. Tucker stands and walks to the centre of the room
clapping as I make my way to him; I look around confused by the atmosphere.
“Well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in” He says loud enough for everyone
to hear when I’m a few steps in front of him.
“What’s going on Tuck?” I ask giggling nervously.
“You tell me”
“Umm…”
“Why don’t you start with where you stayed last night?” he snaps at me making me
flinch.
“A hotel” I whisper still confused by the anger in his eyes.
“A hotel?” he shouts and laughs once. I shift uncomfortable and from the corner of
my eye I can see that slowly all the students have gathered around us and now we
are stood in the middle of a crowd. It’s deathly silent as everyone watches us.
“Who with?” he demands.
I open my mouth to reply but my phone beeps and cuts me off. I look down at the
phone in my hand but Tucker leans forward and snatches it out of my hand.
“Let’s have a look shall we?” he says mindlessly as he looks at the screen. “Phin”
he calls out to everyone.
“Tucker …” Sophie says softly from behind us.
“Not now Soph” he snaps back at her. “Did you stay with Phin last night?” he
demands snarling his name at me. I’m only able to nod even though he’s not looking
at me he’s reading the text. “Thanks for last night; I’m sorry about what I said this
morning, please come back. You mean too much to me. I don’t want to loose you” he
reads aloud making everyone gasp. “Did you sleep with him?” he shouts at me.
I don’t know why I don’t even try to defend myself, I open my mouth but no words
come out. “Actually don’t even bother to answer that, I’m not even all that surprised.
I should have known from the beginning. Play the abused quiet girl and go around
unnoticed then all of a sudden you start hanging around with me, making me care for
you and then what, what is this? Some sort of twisted lesson you are attempting to
teach me? Getting me back for all the girls that I slept with and never bothered with
again? Is that it?” He shouts at me making me take a step back until I bump into
someone who just pushes me forward again.
“No” I whisper shaking my head at him wiping away an escaped tear.
“Or was I just a practice run? That must be it. Try me out so that you know what
your doing when you go back to you’re boyfriend who you mean so much to that he
doesn’t want to loose you?” he all but screams this at me.
“Enough” I scream finally finding my voice and fed up with everything. “You don’t
know what you’re talking about! Do you even know who Phin is? He’s my nine year
old step brother. He phoned me last night when his dad hit him. You know the same
man who abused me for eight years? The same man who tried killing me until you
stopped him. Well he was pretty shaken up and scared so I picked him up and took
him to a hotel knowing that if I brought him back here they would have come here
looking for him. I tried calling you but it went straight to answer phone so I left a
message on Matt’s phone telling him where I was and to give you our room number if
you were looking for me. That message you just read out to half the school no less,
was because this morning we argued over whether or not he should go back there
and I walked out of the room on him. What I can’t understand is why, after everything
that you don’t trust me?”
 “Do you want to know why I did it?” He asks smiling at me but with no hint of the
amusement or kindness that I am used to from him. “Because I had never been with
a virgin before, you were just something to cross off a list.”
His words act as a physical blow and I stumble back a step I can feel the color
draining from my face as a pain starts in my chest. “Want to know why I did it?” I ask
staring him straight in the eye.
“Because you’re a whore?” he asks holding his hands out around him, his words
that I had heard so many times from my step dad turn that fire in my chest into a full
blown explosion.
“No” I shake my head at him “Because I fucking loved you!” I whisper to him tuning
to push my way through the crowd as the tears fall from my eyes and I struggle to
breathe through the pain that I’m sure is my heart breaking.
Once I have cleared the crowd I come face to face with a smirking Beth, I stop in
front of her and pay no attention to the students that have turned towards us from
watching my escape.
When I look at her I meet her eyes head on. “Oh and throwing my past in my face
to piss me off?” I ask and her smirk gets a bit smug.
I nod once at her “It worked” and then with a strength behind me I didn’t even
know I had I punch her in the face making her stumble back and land on the floor
cupping her now bleeding nose. “Don’t ever slap me again.” I call over my shoulder
and walk out the doors.
I almost fall when my jacket is grabbed from behind mid step. I whip around and
look up into Sophie’s apologetic eyes.
“Wait Brooke” She says trying to catch her breath.
“Don’t Soph, I’m done. It’s over” I shake my head at her and run to my room for
the last time hoping I never see him ever again.
 Chapter Eighteen
Two years later…

I try to make a run for it when the taxi pulls up outside the club but Andrew just
throws me over his shoulders making me shriek and giggle at the same time.
“Put me down!” I yell laughing.
“Not until you follow through on the bet!” he shouts back at me, I lift my head to
glare at Jess and Mel who are laughing hysterically at us.
I’m still kicking and screaming when he opens the door to the club and everyone
cheers as we make our way through the club to the bar. I kick and call for help but
everyone just laughs and cheers when Andrew slaps my backside.
“Hey!” I shout at him making him laugh even more.
He stops and turns so I’m facing the bar, Lucy is stood there laughing at me “What
happened this time?” She asks not phased by our bickering and struggles.
“Lost a bet” I pout at her with pleading eyes making her laugh harder. “I lost my
top and he has to do a body shot off me” I groan and watch as she clears a space for
me on the bar.
The cheers around us get louder as Andrew lays me down on the bar and Lucy gets
the shot ready. I try to stay still and ignore all the whistles and shouts around me,
pouting pathetically to the ceiling.
I look down and watch as the salt is sprinkled from the hem of my shorts around
my belly button and up to the bottom of my bikini top, Lucy tries her best to stop the
shot from spilling out of the glass as she places it in between my breasts and then,
lastly puts the lime in my mouth while I try my best to glare at her.
Chants of “Do it. Do it!” go up around us as I watch Andrew try to contain his
laughter long enough to well … do it.
Deliberately slowly he licks the salt from my skin and grins up at me as his wraps
his lips around the shot glass, lifts his head and takes the shot, returning it to it’s
place in my bikini top he winks at me and then bends down to suck the lime while I
still hold it in my mouth. Once he pulls back the crowd roars with cheers and
applause. I shake my head at them all, remove the shot glass and lime then jump
down from the bar and start taking orders for drinks.
“Increasing business as always” Will smirks at me as he walks past and eyes my
lack of clothing.
“I will not loose another bet” I promise myself out loud. He just chuckles and heads
into the office just as I catch a hopeful “I sure hope you do”
“Tell me again why you aren’t sleeping with him” Lucy asks wistfully me running
her gaze over Andrew who is talking to a pretty blonde girl on the other side of the
bar. I can’t deny that Andrew is one of the best looking men I have ever seen, with his
blonde hair and green eyes he is classically good looking, he’s tall and his body is well
taken care of. He also charming, too charming.
“Because that man charms his way through beds like we pour drinks” I answer the
same way I always do, making her roll her eyes.
“Bet it’s worth it though” she sighs happily.
“I’m not taking anymore bets” I snap at her much to her amusement.
“You will, you will by the end of the night” she argues back.
“I know” I mutter “I can’t help it, he’s just so arrogant, and I can’t help but at least
try to prove him wrong sometimes”
“What bet did you loose this time by the way?” she asks cocking her head to the
side.
 “First of all he bet me that I wouldn’t be able to not make a sarcastic comment for
a full ten minutes”
“Pffft why the hell would you take that bet?”
“I was doing fine for a whole eight minutes and then he told me sex with him could
be fun”
“To which you replied …” she prompts smirking making me grimaces.
“That I’m sure the sex is fun by the trip to health clinic the morning after isn’t so
much” I mutter as she bursts out laughing. “Then he bet me that I couldn’t go to the
bar and get a round of drinks without getting hit on by at least three people”
“And I take it you did?” she laughs at my expression.
“Two guys and one girl” I admit “I bet it was a set up!” I say a bit too loudly making
a few people near us turn and look.
“Well just don’t bet anymore clothing tonight” she smirks at me and then moves
away to serve a few people.
“Hey, I got another bet” Andrew shouts over the music to me after about an hour
of serving men who just stare at my chest the whole time, I shake my head at him.
“Forget it, I’m not taking anymore bets, I’m giving them up” I shout back.
“Aww come on Brooke, one more won’t hurt” Mel calls to me laughing. I shake my
head at her. “I suppose you’re right, it’s pointless, he always wins anyway” she
relents giving up.
“That’s right, it’s because I’m amazing, awesome and the best at everything”
Andrew winks at me.
“Fine” I grit my teeth at him, determined to prove him wrong on at least one thing
by the end of the night.
“You’ll never learn” Lucy laughs as she comes over to us.
“Make it good” Jess shouts between barks of laughter.
“What’s going on now?” Will asks walking over to us looking excited at the sight of
us all huddled together over the bar.
“Brooke just took another bet” Lucy tells him amused.
“What’s the bet?” He asks rubbing his hands together.
“I don’t know yet but I’m not going to loose” I snap at him making everyone howl
with laughter again.
“Hmmm got a jar or a box over there?” Andrew asks him with a smirk.
“Uh ... yeah, hold on” We all watch as Will walks into the office, when he comes
back he’s holding a flat square box about ten inches in diameter and three deep.
“OKAY you have to dance on the bar to a song of my choice.”
“What’s the bet?” I ask leaning my elbows on the bar.
“I bet that you can’t pull in five hundred from drinks in twenty minutes, time
starting from when you get up there”
I start to protest but Will cuts me off. “That’s a damn good bet”
“What happens either way?” I ask warily.
“If you win, you can pick anything you want and I’ll make sure you get it, if you
loose then you have to dance on the bar at least twice a week for a month”
“A fucking damn good bet” Will claps his hands together deciding for me that I am
taking the bet.
“I’ll ask the band to play something interesting” Andrew smirks at me.
“This should be good it’s a new band. Not sure what they will make of this but I’m
sure you’ll have them eating out of the palm of your hand by the end of the night”
Lucy informs me.
“What are they like?” I ask curious now that I notice I haven’t heard them before.
 “A bunch of hotties” she sighs happily making me laugh.
“You got two minutes” Andrew shouts over to me when he returns.
I quickly throw back a shot of tequila that Lucy hands me just as the song finishes,
Wills voice comes over the speakers above and around us, I look around but he’s no
longer at the bar.
“As the majority of you are already aware our favourite – no offence Luce – lady
has taken another bet, now we all know she will probably loose, guessing from the
ones she’s already lost tonight by her lack of clothing – not that we mind” A loud
cheer goes up in the club “get ready ladies and gentlemen for the clubs very first –
and not last if she looses – bar dance!” A loud cheer goes up around the club and I’m
lifted off the ground onto the bar, I turn and glare down at Andrew who just shakes
his head and laughs at me.
When I hear the first few beats of the song that he has chosen I can’t contain my
grin, the band are doing a cover of Bad Girlfriend one of my favorite songs.
I start slowly by rotating my hips and walking across the bar slowly smiling down at
everyone that has gathered around the bar to watch from the bar, as the chorus
comes on I grin down at Andrew and shake my ass just like the song says and laugh
when his jaw drops, I run my hand through my hair as I pull it out of my face and
lower myself to the bar slowly coming up rear pointed out, rotating my hips again I
keep in tune with the drums and smile when I see Lucy and Will quickly pouring drinks
trying to keep up with the orders that are flying in as the song comes to an end I flip
my head back and smirk down at Andrew.
“Want me to do that again?” I ask casually smiling sweetly.
He just stares dumbfounded. No one here is aware of how I can dance; they all just
know me as the sarcastic self possessed girl who stays away from men in a sexual
way. The band has stopped playing and the DJ puts on a dance song,
I look up just as two men step forward and grab my arms to help me down off the
bar when I catch sight of the band. They are all watching me; four of them grinning at
me as I watch them take in my body hungrily but the fifth one who has just put the
microphone down is just staring at me blinking. I feel myself do the same as I lock
gazes with Tucker Lloyd.
Before I can react I’m back down on the floor and being pulled into a hug by Mel
and Jess.
“You killed it!”
“We had no idea you could dance like that”
They both exclaim in my ears, I frown and shake my head forcing a smile and
trying to relax through the shock of seeing him again.
“Were you a stripper?” Jess asks laughing
“Umm, no I did dancing when I was younger and took a few pole dancing lessons
for fitness” I reply automatically.
I feel two arms wrap around my hips and I’m spun around. “You cheated!” Andrew
shouts down at me.
“It was your bet” I smirk “beside I can still loose” we both turn to look at the bar
that is overflowing with people trying to get a drink.
“I think you might have won this one, everyone needs a drink after seeing that, I’m
sure even the women’s mouths dried up after watching you shake your ass like that”
He lifts me up and puts me over his shoulder I screech out in surprise and he pushes
through the crowd once we are on the now empty stage he takes the mic and the DJ
stops the music, everyone turns to look at us and I shift uncomfortably.
“Did you all enjoy the dance?” he yells into the mic and laughs as the crowd erupts
once again in cheers.
“Even if Brooke doesn’t win the bet, I think she deserves something for that
anyway, what do you think guys?” Cheers go up around us again and Andrew turns to
me, lifting the mic up again “What’s it going to be Brooke? What do you want?” He
smirks at me as if he already knows the answer and then it dawns on me that he
knows exactly what he’s doing and I glare at him.
“My top back” I fold my arms under my chest and then quickly put them on my
hips as whistles surround me.
“She wants her top back guys, what do you think, should we give it back to her?”
he turns back to the crowd and boo’s almost deafen me I glare at Andrew and pout
at the crowd making them boo even harder. “I think that’s a no Brooke, choose
something else” he laughs at me.
I take the mic from the stand the band left and turn to the crowd.
“But there really is nothing I want more than my top guys” I say sweetly into the
mic, making everyone groan and say no all at once.
“I don’t think they want you to have it back” Andrew says into his mic smiling and
shaking his head at me.
“Hmm but this is between me and you” I sigh into the mic
“It is” he nods “and I say you’re not getting your top back” he smirks
“Hmmm” I ponder still talking into the mic and taking a step towards Andrew
licking my bottom lip watching his eyes follow my tongue and his throat working as he
swallows “I could always convince you” I say huskily into the mic and taking a step
towards him as he takes a step back holding up his hands ignoring the crowd
cheering.
“I don’t doubt for a second that you could get me to agree to anything in under five
minutes” he shakes his head at me smiling.
I continue my path towards him and stop when are bodies are touching and wrap
and my arms around his shoulders so the mic is just behind the ear that’s facing the
crowd, I turn to them wink a then whisper into the mic and his ear “Two minutes”
“Uh huh, we’re not playing this game” he says turning his head and speaking into
the mic resting on his shoulder.
“OKAY” I shrug and take a step back “I could always kick your ass” making the
crowd laugh and Andrew chuckle and shake his head at me.
“You’re giving up your seduction after thirty seconds?” he says into his mic
disbelievingly
“Well that’s the same amount of time you hang around for the morning after one
of your seductions isn’t it?” I reply sweetly.
He looks at his watch and turns towards the bar. Lifting his mic “How’d she do Will,
five hundred?” he asks. We both watch as Will shakes his head unable to hide his
smile.
“So you know what that means guys? It means that for your very own
entertainment Brooke will be dancing on this bar twice a week for the next month. So
do yourself a favour and make sure you don’t miss it!” he announces and once again
we are surrounded by applause and cheers.
“Hey, I thought I still got something even if I lost?” I moan to the room
“Well it depends on what you want” Andrew replies turning his attention back to
me.
“If I ask you not to make another bet with me for a month will you agree?” I ask
already knowing the answer.
“Definitely not, it’s too cute watching you refuse then getting all stubborn and
taking the bet anyway” he states seriously, making everyone laugh again.
“Fine. Then I want you to take your top off” I demand.
“What? Why?” he asks confused.
 “Well if I have to walk around in a bikini top all night and everyone gets to look at
me, I want something distracting to look at too” I smirk as the females in the room
cheer.
He shakes his head at me and I stomp over to him and start unbuttoning his shirt
much to his amusement. “Take it off” starts being chanted and I rip the rest of his
shirt open sending buttons flying off the stage. The crowd laugh at my impatience
and I lean up to plant a quick kiss on his chest then with a wink I jump off the stage
and head back behind the bar.
“If you see me agreeing to another bet ever again, pull me away and lock me in a
room please” I beg Lucy once we have served everyone at the bar and it’s quiet for a
few minutes.
“It’s just too damn funny to watch” she shakes her head at me laughing.
“You know, if you ever consider leaving here, I will kidnap you and bring you back”
Will says as he makes his way over to us chucking to himself. “I’ve never know a
place to be so busy and business has never been so good since you started making
bets with Andrew” he says in my ear as he pulls me under his arm.
“Oh so it’s not because I’m fun to be around, it’s all about the money” I reply dryly
when he releases me and walks back into the office.
“You know, I should quit just to get back at him for taking advantage of my
embarrassing situations” I mutter to Lucy.
“You get yourself into them, we just enjoy watching them” she laughs and turns to
serve the next customer.
“What can I get you boys?” I ask as two of the band members stand in front me.
“Two beers please” the guitarist asks giving me a once over. I turn to get their
drinks and as I’m opening them I glance up to see them watching me with matching
smiles. I smile back.
“So you playing here often now then?” I ask
“Most weekends I think” The guitarist answers “Is it always this entertaining here?”
he carries on amused.
“No only when I’m betting apparently” I mutter.
“Glad we could see it, I’m Derek by the way”
“I’m Cam” the drummer puts in.
“I’m Brooke” I smile back at them “The one who always finds herself in some
embarrassing situation as the result of a bet”
They both laugh and turn when someone stands in between them.
“Hey Brooke” Tucker smiles softly at me. I take a minute to take him in. It doesn’t
hurt as much as I thought it would to look at him, I still have the pain in my chest but
it’s not as bad as it was. I still have butterflies when ever I see him though which
surprises me. He hasn’t changed much, he’s put on some weight but it’s all muscle
from what I can tell by his plain white t-shirt stretching across his arms and chest. His
hair is a bit longer but still the same sandy brown it always was and his eyes are still
the same light blue.
“Brooke?” he asks frowning at my staring.
I shake my head and relax my features.
“It’s been a while Tuck” I smile “You’re looking good” I nod at him.
“You look happy” he smiles kindly at me “It suits you”
“I am” I smile back. His eyes trail down my body and he raises an eyebrow at my
missing top “I lost a bet, it happens often, not the no top thing the loosing a bet thing”
I explain making him smirk.
“Well its better than those god awful baggy things you used to wear”
“Hey! There was nothing wrong with those, they were comfortable” I defend.
 “So I thought of a way you can get your top back, it includes me you and a hotel
room” Andrew says to me leaning across the bar next to Tucker. I roll my eyes and
pick up a piece of lime from under the bar to throw it at him making him duck and
laugh. “OKAY what about another bet” he asks oblivious to Tucker staring at him and
Cam and Derek watching us amused.
“No more bets!” I plead adding a pout.
“Fine no more bets tonight, you know I can’t resist that pout of yours” he sighs
“Until tomorrow that is” he winks at me and walks away laughing at my growl.
“Friend of yours?” Tucker asks searching my eyes.
“Something like that” I reply not giving anything away in my expression.
“Hey, you two know each other?” Cam asks looking between me and Tucker.
“We used to” I reply breaking eye contact. “Shit … quick one of you take your top
off please” I beg as I watch Andrews’s brother walking towards the bar.
“Uhh ... Excuse me?” Derek asks confused.
“Please someone give me your top to wear” all three just stare at me like I’m
crazy.
As he gets closer I jump down behind the bar and scowl at the three heads poking
over the top of the bar laughing at me, Lucy walks over and I grab her hand to pull
her down with me.
“What are you doing?”
“Please get me a top to wear” I plead desperately.
“Why?” she asks standing up and then spotting Dan she starts laughing at me but
turns to get me a shirt from the pile we keep in a box under the bar. I pull it on and
do up the first few buttons then stand as I tie the bottom in a knot. “You know he’s
seen you naked so I think it’s too late to be shy” she smirks at me I ignore her, Derek
and Cam who are laughing at me and Tucker who is turning to watch as I jump over
the bar.
“I heard you lost another bet babe” Dan grins at me as he pulls me into a hug.
“Try three. I lost three bets” I pout at him.
“Hey Luce, she been behaving?” He asks laughing as he puts me under his arm.
“Does she ever?” she smirks back at him.
“I am here you know” frown at the both.
“What did you bet against this time?” Dan asks looking down at me.
“That I could go to the bar and not get hit on by three people, that one was a set
up I’m sure of it. That I could dance on the bar and bring in five hundred from drinks,
I don’t know what the result on that one was. Knowing Will I won but he lied just so I’d
do it again” I explain.
“And what did you loose to them?”
“Andrew had to do a body shot off me for the getting hit on bet and for the bar
dance bet I have to dance on it twice a week for a month”
“Tell him about the third bet” Lucy laughs, making Cam, Derek and Tucker all turn
to me expectantly.
“I bet that I could go ten minutes without making a sarcastic comment” I mutter
glaring at Tucker who snorts the loudest.
“It is not that hard to do! I could do it if he wasn’t so bloody full of himself!” I
protest.
“I can’t believe you even tried to win that bet, you should have known better. If
there was ever person to loose that one it’s you” Dan laughs down at me making me
fume.
“Hey, you’ve gone back on the bet” Andrew glares at me taking in my shirt. I
struggle so I can get out of Dan’s grip and stomp my way to the stage.
 Picking up a mic I face the crowd and watch as everyone in the club turns to look
at me as the music stops. I hear a few people yell that I’ve put a top back on and roll
my eyes.
“Yes that’s right; I’ve put a shirt on. Does anyone have a problem with that?” I ask
as Will comes out of the office to watch what’s going on.
I smile as the crowd shouts yes. “So you think it’s fair that I have to work all night
without a top on? I would like to wear a shirt for the last hour of my shift please” a
chorus of no’s go up around me. “Well that’s a damn shame because I don’t need
any ones permission to wear clothes” I snap at them all.
“Maybe if you didn’t have a flippant reply to everything you wouldn’t have lost the
top in the first place” Andrew’s voice comes over the speakers and I see him sitting
on the bar with a mic in his hand smirking at me.
“I don’t have a reply for everything” I say offended.
“Oh really?” he shakes his head laughing at me.
“I’ll ask you one question; if you answer it nicely then you can keep the top. If not
you loose it”
“Am I the only one who thinks this whole thing is kind of perverted?” I ask turning
to the crowd who just nod.
“Ready?” Andrew asks chuckling and Lucy whispers in his ear.
“What would be your first thought if you woke up naked next to me in bed?”
“Huh … it’s kind of warm considering hell has just frozen over” I reply without
thinking and wince when everyone laughs at my inability to not say the first thing that
comes into my mind.
“My point is proven now loose the top” Andrew says smugly.
I turn to him and glare at Lucy who is bent over laughing, Cam and Derek have
been joined by the other two band members and are all chuckling, Tucker just looks
amused. Smiling to myself I turn back to the crowd.
“I tell you what how about I loose the shirt and the bikini top?” I ask and turn back
to the bar to see Andrew no longer looking smug.
“Have you all met the new band?” I ask the crowd. “Why don’t you all come up
here and bring a jug of water each from Lucy?” I call over to them and wink at the
crowd who watch amazed as the guys make their way over to me. Once they have all
joined me on the stage I whisper to the two band member I haven’t yet met and ask
their names.
“OKAY guys this is the band that will now be entertaining you most weekends. They
are called Stuck and they will also be playing the songs that I have to dance on the
bar to, so anyway we have Cam, Derek, Jamie and Tommy and this” I turn and
pointing “Is Tucker. Tucker and I went to university together” A loud cheers goes up
and I take a step towards him smiling.
“What are you doing Brooke?” he asks nervously around his smile making me grin.
“Don’t worry, I won’t hurt you” I smile into the mic making the crowd laugh.
I put the mic by the handle into my mouth, taking the jug out of his hands I place it
on the floor and pull his white t-shirt up over his head.
We’re rewarded with a loud squeal from the women in the club to which I wink at
him.
Completely turning my back to the crowd I take off my shirt and put his T-shirt on
over my head once it’s on I undo the knot of my bikini that’s behind my head and pull
it down my legs and step out of it. I catch Tucker staring at my chest and roll my eyes
at him “nothing you haven’t seen before” I whisper to him before turning back to the
crowd.
“Brooke” Andrew warns into his mic, picking up on what I’m about to do.
“Try not to have a heart attack honey” I reply to him and gesture for the band to
 “Try not to have a heart attack honey” I reply to him and gesture for the band to
come forward.
“Soak her, Soak her” the crowd chants and as soon as the band catches on they all
start laughing and shaking their head.
“This is definitely was definitely the best idea we had, moving here” I hear Cam say
behind me.
“You have no idea” Tucker mutters back.
“What are you waiting for boys?” I call into the mic before rolling it across the floor
to the other side of the stage and getting down onto my knees just as five jugs of ice
cold water come pouring down on my head and my chest. The Crowd erupts and the
DJ puts the music back on. Thanks to Andrew still holding his mic I can hear him Lucy,
Dan and Will all laughing into it.
“Did I mention how good it is to see you again? Tucker smiles at me as he helps me
up and off the stage.
“Sorry about your T-shirt” I shrug at him smirking.
“Oh hey Jo, This is Tucker, Tucker this is Joanne” I introduce them both and head
back to the bar not looking back but hearing her giggle “Call me Jo”.
“So who’s the guy?” Lucy asks handing me a towel so I can attempt to stop my hair
from dripping all over the floor.
“Who?” I ask from under my towel.
“The one you just left half naked”
“Oh … That would be Tucker Lloyd, we went to uni together. Do you remember
when my friend Sophie visited?” I ask tuning to watch Tucker and Jo with her.
“Yeah” she says not taking her eyes off him.
“Well remember her boyfriend Matt, that’s his cousin”
“He’s cute” she notes
“Yeah” I agree to the understatement of the century.
“So what’s he like?” She asks turning to face me.
I shrug “Well tonight’s the fist time I’ve spokayen and seen him in two years so I
don’t really know what he’s like anymore”
“What was he like then?” She pushes.
“Umm outgoing, confident, had sex with anything with legs…” I trail off.
“So basically he’s Andrew”
“Worse than Andrew”
“And hotter” she sighs.
“Just be careful, from what I remember he was only ever interested in one thing,
and it wasn’t how you got home in the morning” I caution noting the gleam in her
eyes.
“Do you two have history?” she asks turning back to the crowd.
“We used to friends” I reply turning around with her and catch Tuckers eye, he’s
been watching us.
“Used to be?” she asks confused.
“When I left, I never wanted to see him again” I sigh and walk away to serve my
last drink of the night.

That night when I get home I head straight for my bedroom. Kneeling on the floor I
pull out the box from under my bed that is full of things from my life before I moved
here.
Curled up on my bed, over the covers I flick through some of the photos I haven’t
looked a for two years, I watch as the first tear falls on the photo in my hand and
trails a wet line directly between Tucker and I, I stash the photos under my pillow and
cry softly into the empty room until sleep swallows me.
For the first time in a long time, I don’t sleep peacefully as the old nightmares
return.
 Chapter Nineteen

“Brooke!” Lucy calls me over to me as I make my way through the bar. “I’m
getting off in a minute” she grins at me.
“Want a hand?” I ask noticing the large group of girls waiting for their drinks.
“Don’t you dare, it’s your birthday. Give me two minutes, Andrew’s already got a
table” she points with her head and I turn to see where he is sat.
“Why are the band sat there?” I ask as I watch Tucker and Andrew throw their
heads back laughing.
“Oh Andrew and Tucker have gotten close” she says as if I should already know
this.
“Great” I mutter to myself and help her down as she climbs over the bar with a
tray of shot glasses, a bottle of tequila and then hands me two jugs of beer and stack
of glasses.
“Don’t hold back baby girl” Will calls to me over the bar. I wink at him and head
over to the table where everyone stands to greet me a happy birthday.
“What’s the plan?” Jamie asks once we’re all seated.
“The plan is to get the Birthday girl wrecked!” Andrew shouts and everyone at the
table cheers.
“We’re going to play ‘I never’” Mel announces to the table. “Rules are simple we all
have to take turns to say something we have never done, if anyone at the table has
ever done it they take a shot” she explains unnecessarily while handing us all out shot
glasses and then filling them. “Birthday girl goes first”
“I have never woken up naked on a train” I announce then burst out laughing when
Andrew empties his shot glass. “That is so random”.
“I have never has sex with a man” he says smirking as all us girls throw our shots
back.
“I’ve never kissed a girl” Lucy smirks at the boys then drops her jaw as I throw my
shot back.
“Something you wanna tell us Brooke?” Andrew grins down at me.
“I had an eventful university life” I shrug.
“Is this something you witnessed?” he asks Tucker seriously, hoping for a good
story. I glare over at Tucker but he ignores it.
“If I remember correctly it was straight after she finished her pole dance” he
chuckles when gasps of “no way” go up around out table making me roll my eyes.
“You’ve been holding out on me Brooke?” Andrew asks looking me over.
“You hardly know me” I wink at him.
“Oh I know you” He winks back
“You couldn’t handle me at my best” I smirk at him.
“I’ve never danced on a bar” Cam chuckles as I take my shot then pout at the
table.
“Come on guys, your killing me, I won’t be able to walk after twenty minutes of
this” I complain.
“I’ll help you out Brooke” Jess assures me “I’ve never made a sex tape”
Everyone watches the table when no one takes their shot and then Andrew clears
his throat and looks pointedly to my shot glass.
I growl but then take my shot. Everyone stares at me open mouthed.
“You have not made a sex tape!” Lucy shrieks at me making me blush.
“Oh she has” Andrew grins “How do you think Dan has seen her naked?”
“You made a sex tape with Dan” Lucy, Mel and Jess all scream at me
simultaneously.
“No I didn’t, he found it” I grimaced remember all the weeks of torment I went
through after that.
“So who was it with?” Lucy leans forward.
I look around the table but avoid everyone’s eyes
“No one, it was just me. I forgot about the camera I had set up in the spare
bedroom” I snap embarrassed.
The girls all burst out laughing and the boys swap hi fives between saying “I gotta
get a copy of that”, “Fucking hell”, “that’s so hot” and “Bloody hell Brooke” the last
one from Tucker with a look of awe in his eyes.
“You lot think you know me but we’ll see” I roll my eyes at them “I’ve never been
caught having sex by my mother, while doing it on the washing machine, in her
kitchen, on Christmas day” I say happily glancing at Mel when she takes her shot.
“I’ve never drunk dialed three people and threatened to kill them, in the same
night” She smiles at me as I take my shot.
“I’ve never gone out in public wearing odd shoes” I say looking over to Derek.
“What neither have I” he asks confused, I raise an eyebrow at him and point under
the table. Moments later everyone is laughing and he’s taking his shot.
“I’ve never had five men pour jugs of water over me in front of a hundred people”
he smiles back at me.
“I’ve never” I say before taking my shot “asked my best friend to marry me” I
smile over at Jess who shrugs.
“I was drunk and you’re cute” she pokes her tongue out at me making me roll my
eyes. “I’ve never been approached by a police officer and asked him if he was a
stripper when he asked to see my driving license” she smirks at me and Tucker
snorts.
“I’ve never had sex with someone more then ten years older than me” I finish my
shot and look over to Tucker who chuckles, shaking his and takes his shot as the boys
all pat him on the back saying “Dude!”.
“I’ve never stripped in front someone whilst breaking up with them” he raises an
eyebrow at me and I wince remembering Jason.
“OKAY I get the point people, next game or I’m going to be on my ass in a minute”
I complain feeling the beginnings of the alcohol taking affect.
“OKAY so because it’s you’re twenty third birthday we get to ask you twenty three
questions, no thinking about it first answer that comes into your head” Andrew
informs me.
“OKAY, hit me” I say sinking into my chair as they all start firing questions at me so
fast I can’t even tell who’s asking what.
“Ever had a one night stand?”
“Yes”
“Ever been arrested?”
“No”
“Ever been in love?”
“Yes”
“One person you love?”
“My dad”
“Have you slept with anyone who’s in the club tonight?”
“Yes”
“Ever been proposed to by a boyfriend?”
“No”
 “Have you slept with Dan?”
“No”
“Would you ever sleep with him?”
“No”
“How many people at this table have you kissed?”
“Five”
“How many did you kiss properly, with tongue?”
“Two”
“What’s one thing you miss about being in a relationship?”
“Oral sex”
“Why?”
“Because I like to give my boyfriend a blowjob every morning to see that he has a
good day”
“Are you real?”
“Yes”
“How do you like your men in bed?”
“Erect”
“Have you always sucked at bets?”
“Yes … no wait I don’t suck!”
“Apparently you do … have you always been sarcastic or is it just since you moved
here?”
“Always”
“Do you have a tattoo?”
“Two”
“One thing that turns you on?”
“Tongue”
“What’s do you mean?”
“Just a tongue, it can be in my mouth, on my hand, on my neck, anywhere just the
feel of a tongue.
“One thing that is guaranteed to make you come during sex?”
“Sucking my neck”
“What underwear are you wearing right now?”
“White lace thong”
“What bra?”
“I’m not wearing one. Have you not noticed my strapless dress?”
“Are you still a whore?” the last question is whispered in my ear. I jump up out of
my chair screaming and hug Sophie who’s just crept up behind me.
I laugh at her question “What are you doing here?”
“Didn’t think we’d miss your birthday did you?” she laughs as she releases me and
Matt immediately pulls me into a hug.
“God I love you guys” I sigh as I pull out two more chairs for them at our table.
“You know everyone right?” I ask before pouring them both a drink to which they nod
and greet everyone.
“What have we missed” Sophie asks settling into the group like she’s known them
all years.
“I have a few questions about some of your answers” Lucy grins at me.
“Oh no” I groan.
“Let’s see. The tats for one” She says still grinning at me.
“I was wondering about them considering what you were wearing the other night
there isn’t too many places they can be” Derek points out.
“Tats? As in plural? I thought you only had one” Sophie asks intrigued.
“I have two” I stand and turn pulling my hair away from the back of my neck where
there is a simple script reading Sine Virtus, Sine Laus across the back of my neck.
“What does it mean?” Mel asks staring at the tattoo.
“It’s Latin it means no courage, no glory” I reply sitting back down.
“The other one?” Jamie asks raising an eyebrow.
“I’m not going to be showing any of you my other one”
“The two people at the table you have kissed?” Jess asks.
“Andrew and Tucker” I reply when everyone looks between me and the two men.
“The person or people in the club that you have had sex with?” Lucy asks
“I’m not answering that” I reply
“Okay anyone at the table?” She asks looking at Andrew and Tucker who are both
watching each other.
“Enough questions, you had more than you’re twenty three” I plead not answering
the question.
Everyone at the table heads over to the dance floor leaving me with Sophie and
Matt.
“So Tuckers here” Sophie notes.
“Yeap and you didn’t tell me” I turn my most accusing look on her.
“You seem to be getting on fine” she shrugs
“It would have been nice to be prepared. You know the fist time we bumped into
each other, I was wearing a pair of shorts and a bikini top while dancing on the bar” I
stress
“Sorry, I didn’t want you to freak out” she apologizes once her laughter is under
control. “How is it between you two?” she asks seriously now.
I shrug “Fine I guess”
She sighs “Brooke, it can’t be fine, the last time you two spoke … he hurt you ...
you told him you loved him … you were both so angry” she struggles to fit a sentence
together.
“We haven’t mentioned that” I explain
“What? How can you have not talked about it?” She demands slapping her hand on
the table causing everyone to look at us even the band. I turn to her.
“We just haven’t that’s part of my past and in case you haven’t noticed I’ve left all
that crap behind me when I left. I don’t want to talk about it. I’m a different person
now and I hope he is too”
“Bull, have you been with anyone since him?” She demands
“I’ve had boyfriends” I defend feebly
“Have you slept with any of them?” she pushes
“Only one since him” I shrug “I haven’t met anyone that you know…” I trail off
unable to explain it.
“I know Brooke but two years? I know you’re a different person now and I’m so
happy for you but you either have to talk to him or get over him”
“I am over him; I have been for a long time”
“OKAY fine, so you’ve noticed how him and Mel keep staring at each other and
flirting with each other. They are probably going to have sex tonight, how does that
make you feel?”
“Sick” I admit looking down at the table.
“See you still have feelings for him” she insists softly.
“And we all know how well that worked out the last time. In fact if my memory is
right, half the university saw how well that worked out last time” I snap.
“That was two years ago, feelings that last this long when you haven’t even spoken
to or seen him and after what he did are strong Brooke”
“I can’t trust him again Soph”
“He saved your life Brooke”
“Yeah so he could tick another box on his list” I practically growl at her.
“That’s not the reason he did it and you know it” she says while rubbing my arm.
“I never would have been in that position if it wasn’t for him in the first place” I tell
her getting both her and Matt’s full attention
“What do you mean?” Matt asks looking slightly sick.
“Remember that night I came back to the dorm after Beth slapped me and I
stormed out?” They both nod silently “Well I went to my mum’s house and woke them
all up by banging on the door. My mum answered and I barged in there I was winding
up him and she went for me but I elbowed her and then he came after me which is
what I wanted and then I just lost it and attacked him. He tried tackling me but I
moved and he fell into my mum and they both fell down, I grabbed a lamp and
attacked him. I attacked him Soph and I couldn’t stop, he was bleeding out and I
carried on. The only reason I stopped was because Phin was there and called my
name. After that I knew he would try to kill me” I take a deep breath pushing back
the memories of the night and trying to hold back the tears. “The point is, that if
Tucker hadn’t hurt me in the first place, I never would have gone back there again”
“He never meant to hurt you Brooke” Sophie says softly to me.
“No so what about humiliating me, accusing me of cheating on him, using my past
against me in an argument and calling me a whore. In front of everyone we knew?
Because to me that isn’t something you do to someone you care about”
“He was hurt Brooke” Matt insists.
I snort “Yeah so was I” I feel a stubborn tear roll down my cheek and quickly wipe it
away. Remembering the look on his face when we were arguing. The hurtful things
he said to me all come back at once as it if was happening now.
I’m not even all that surprised…
I should have known from the beginning…
Play the abused quiet girl …
Making me care for you and then what, what is this? Some sort of twisted lesson
you are attempting to teach me? …
Getting me back for all the girls that I slept with and never bothered with again? ...
Is that it …
Do you want to know why I did it? …
I had never been with a virgin before you were just something to cross off a list…
Because you’re a whore?...
I squeeze my eyes close and breathe through the pain of my heart breaking all
over again. The tears won’t stop coming. I shake my head to try and clear it as I push
the memories back.
“He loved you Brooke” Sophie whispers adamantly.
“No!” I shout at her, not caring who’s watching us anymore. “Two years Soph!” I
practically scream at her as I push my chair back roughly and stand up. “Two fucking
years, that’s how long it’s been and do you know how I got through it? By not thinking
about it!”
“Brooke, I’m sorry pretend I never said anything” She says starting to stand.
“Forget it” I shake my head “I know exactly how to end this”
I clean my self up in the bathroom and take the time to calm down.
I just need to take my mind off it and the pain will fade away just like always.
Running a few ideas through in my head I take my place behind the bar.
 “Everything OKAY Brooke, you look pissed and not the type you should be,
considering it’s your birthday” Will asks putting a protective arm around my
shoulders.
“I’ll be fine” I assure him patting his arm.
“What you doing behind the bar on your birthday anyway, don’t even attempt to
try and work tonight” he scolds making me giggle.
“I was thinking about providing some entertainment actually” I wink up at him.
“Just be careful” he says as he walks back into his office leaving me stood behind
the bar watching the crowd.
I mess about behind the bar and flirt with a few customers. I smile reassuringly at
the curious glances from Lucy and Jess. I completely ignore Mel not able to get the
picture of her and Tucker out of my mind, and I shake my head at Sophie every time
she gets up to come over to me when she’s not watching me worriedly.
I straddle the bar and laugh while a group of drunken students slur through singing
‘happy birthday’ to me.
“I’ll buy you a tray of shots if you can impress me in less than two minutes” one of
the students grins up at me.
“Are you sure?” I ask as I jump down from the bar and pour out the six shots that
make up the trays we sell.
“Yeah, I don’t think you can do it” He says smugly.
I smirk at him and reach my hand under the bar next to me to grab a cherry,
pulling the stem out I hold it up for him to see them slip it in my mouth. Ten seconds
later I pull it out with a perfect knot in it.
“Okay you win” he stutters amazed. I laugh and shake my head at him.
“Want me to do it again?” I ask laughing when as soon as I’ve said it he calls a
group of men over to watch. I stand on the bar and grab the microphone.
“Hey Andrew!” I call into the mic trying to spot him through the crowd. I finally spot
him dancing with Jess. “Get your sexy ass over and up here, I need ya. Don’t worry
Jess you’ll get him back in one piece” I laugh.
Zack our weekend bartender pokes me in the leg and I look down to see he is
holding out a handful of cherry stems to me. I take them and one at a time put them
in my mouth and tie in knots them handing them down the guys stood at my feet.
“What are you doing?” Andrews voice full of laughter comes over the speakers as
he walks across the top of the bar watching me curiously.
“Showing these very handsome men what I can do with my tongue” I reply grinning
at him. “Wanna see?” I wiggle my eyebrows at him.
“Always” is all he replies and watches as I repeat the process and pass him the
knotted stem. “Wow no wonder you’re so good at ...” I cut him off by smacking the
top of his head making him grin and the crowd laugh.
“Anytime baby” I sing into the mic at him.
“So what did you call me up here for?” He asks cocking his head at me.
“Well” I start as I turn to face the crowd. “As you all know it is my birthday” The
crowd cheers and says happy birthday and I curtsey to them making them laugh
“Anyway I thought what better way to celebrate than with … a little … bet?” I whisper
the last word into the mic and turn to Andrew.
“I’m up for that what were you thinking?” he asks.
I walk over and lower my mic as I whisper in his ear. “Well as it’s my birthday and I
should celebrate, I was thinking you should pick the man I’m going to celebrate with,
the bet being on if he is still with me in the morning”
The crowd starts chanting “what’s the bet” so I lift my mic back up to tell them but
when I open my mouth Andrew cuts me off straight away.
 “Are you fucking crazy?” he yells into his mic making me wince from the sheer
volume of it.
“Why the hell not?” I demand swinging around to face him.
“I can think of about a hundred reasons why, the first one being is that it’s
dangerous the second one being have you lost your god damn mind?” he snaps.
“It’s not dangerous if I use a…” he cuts me off again by grabbing my arm and
pulling me into him.
“HEY!” I hear Matt shout from the table. We both ignore him.
“You’re not doing it” Andrew says into my ear so only I can hear.
“I can do what the god damn hell I want” I snap back.
“What’s this about Brooke?” he asks as he pushes me away but only far away
enough so he can search my eyes.
“I just want to forget” I whisper to him sadly remembering the last photo I looked
at last night of me and Tucker hugging at a house party covered in paint from a
paintball fight that’s broke out.
He must have seen the pain in them because he pulls me into a hug. “I won’t let
you do it, I’ll follow you around all night if I have to” he says stubbornly letting me
know I don’t have a choice.
It’s then that I notice the club is deathly silent and even Will has come out to see
what’s happening, my eyes travel around the club as I look at all the people that now
make up my life.
Sophie is now stood in front of the bar directly below me, back at the table Matt
and Tucker are in a deep hushed discussion but keeping one eye on me and Andrew.
Matt looks panicked, Tucker’s frowning. It’s then I notice Matt has his hand wrapped
around Tuckers arm. I turn back to the crowd and raise my mic again.
“Sorry guys, I’m not allowed to do the bet I want to do” I pout into the mic causing
a few groans and protests even though they don’t know what the bet was.
“I’m sure we can think of something else” Andrew assures everyone.
“Nothing as fun as mine though” I mutter trying not to look back at Matt and
Tucker.
My foot hits something and I look down to find the tray of shots I won, I bend down
to pick them up and Andrew holds it for me as I take the shots in sync with the crowd
yelling numbers. I hear my name and turn to see Andrew bending down talking to
Sophie. He’s no doubt telling her about my bet. The traitor.
All I want is to forget, with the hope that being with someone will finally erase the
physical memory finally that has kept me up too many nights to count, even though it
never worked before, maybe it has to be with someone I already know.
“Hey Luce?” I call in to the mic “Those questions I got asked earlier I don’t have to
stick to them do I?” I ask but all I get is a confused look from her. “If I answered no to
a question or two of them actually… I can change my mind right?” I explain, she nods
at me.
I quickly chance a look down at Sophie and Andrew to see if they are watching me
but they are still deep in conversation, so I pull out my phone and dial my last chance
at forgetting.
“Hello” the familiar husky voice greets my ear making me smile.
“Hey, where are you?”
“At home, why where are you?”
“At the club, what are you doing later?”
“Are you drunk?” he asks. I didn’t realize I was slurring. Turning and gesturing for
Zack to get me a glass of water. I turn my attention back to my phone
“No, not really anyway” I laugh into the phone
 “Am I missing a good night out?” He laughs with me
“You are, we’re celebrating my birthday but Andrew wont let me have any fun” I
whine
“It’s your birthday?” he asks sounding surprised.
“It is” I confirm
“I would have given you something if I knew”
“I can think of a thing or two that I want” I purr into the phone. I had no idea I was
so good at being slutty, I frown as I realize that.
“Where are you staying tonight?” he asks lowering his voice.
“Umm not sure, hold on” I pull the phone away from my ear and lift the mic “Matt,
are you and Sophie staying over mine tonight?” I ask
“Umm I think so” he calls back.
“Shit” I say forgetting the mic is in my hands and making a few people chuckle but
Matt and Tucker just frown at me.
“I have people staying at mine tonight” I reply into the phone forgetting the mic
again until I hear the cheers from the crowd, I quickly put the mic down and turn
around to collect my glass of water.
“You can come over mine, do you want me to pick you up from the club?” he asks
but before I get a chance to reply the phone is taken out of my hand, I look around
and see Andrew holding it to his ear talking to his brother glaring at me.
I drain my glass and glare back at him for ruining my plans.
“What’s going on Brooke? I’ve never seen you like this before. What’s happened?”
Andrew says in my ear and pockets my phone.
“A lot of shit has happened Andrew, now give me my phone back” I snap at him
fed up of everyone trying to control what I do.
“You can have it back in the morning” he promises kissing my cheek. “So we
thought of a bet yet?” he asks the crowd and passes me my mic. A few people shout
random things out at us making Andrew laugh and me scowl. “You’ll be thanking me
tomorrow morning” Andrew laughs into his mic at my expression.
“Not considering what I would be doing tomorrow morning if you would have let
me have my bet” I snap back. Taking no notice of the “oooohhhs” from the crowd
and watch as Sophie, Matt and Tucker all snaps their heads towards me when they
hear that.
“Trust me” Andrew sighs
“Yeah, and you’ll be thanking me when I’ll be cock blocking you for the next three
months. Have you ever gone three months without sex?” I say sweetly into the mic.
“You’ll hate me for it and I’ll even move in with you if I have to” I insist.
“Honey if you’re going to make me go without sex for three months you do not
want to be in my house alone with me unless you want to end up in my bed, that is”
he says knowingly making me laugh at last.
“Take me there now and we’ll call it quits” I smirk at him feeling myself relax again
and the atmosphere in the club lifts as Andrew and I go back to our usual banter.
“You couldn’t handle me sweetie” he grins at me.
“I got five guys stood at your feet that can tell you that you couldn’t handle my
mouth let alone anything else” I tease and blow a kiss to the students I was doing the
cherry stem trick for.
“Okay, okay if you could have one thing for your birthday right now. What would it
be?” he asks me but faces the crowd.
“Don’t ask me that. You already know what I want”
“Okay. If I could give you something what would it be?” he asks facing me now.
I snort “Don’t ask me that either”
 “It’s hard to find a bet to get around your current intentions Brooke” he sighs.
“Well if you’d give me my phone back I could sort it out” I say but then an idea hits
me. Not one that I want to stick around and watch but one that will save me the
regret that I know will come in the morning and it will make me forget all the same.
“Okay, I promise that I won’t do what I said, but I need my phone please” I promise.
“What are you going to do?” he asks away from his mic.
“I promise I won’t do that, you’re right it was a stupid idea and I’d only regret it
tomorrow. But I do need my phone back. Please there’s something else that will
make me feel better” I say into his ear so only he can hear. “You can even listen in to
the call” I beg now getting desperate.
I watch as he hands over my phone and go through the numbers finding the one I
want and holding it up in between our ears.
“Hey girlie”
“Hey, where you to?” I ask
“At a house party why?”
“Come to the club”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, bring a few friends as well. It’ll be worth it. I promise”
“See you in ten” she hangs up.
The DJ puts on a song and the crowd start chanting “Dance” so I turn to Andrew
and shrug my shoulders “You owe me” he just laughs and takes my hand.
We spend the next fifteen minutes dancing on the bar, me grinding into his hips
and him running his hands through my hair, much to the clubbers delight. When we
finally stop to catch our breath everyone is gathering around the bar to get more
drinks and Andrew and I jump down once we are both handed a bottle of beer each.
Andrew heads back to the table and I promise to meet him there once I have found
my friends, I find them stood near the dance floor looking around. I don’t like what
I’m about to do and have to stop to hold my stomach for a minute before I head over
to greet them.
Once I’ve spoken to them all briefly and told them my plan they follow me back to
the table.
“Brooke what the hell was all that about up on the …” Sophie trails off when she
notices that I’m not alone.
“Hey guys, I have some friends for you all to meet. Everyone this is Ade, Louise,
Hannah, Adele, Lauren, Whitney and Gemma” I point out each girl when I say their
names then turn to the girls. “Girls this is, Sophie, Lucy, Mel, Jess, Cam, Derek,
Tucker, Jamie, Neil, Matt and Andrew” I do the same pointing everyone out to each
other. “I’ll be back in a sec, just going to say hey to a few people” I say as I watch the
girls all introduce themselves to the guys.
“Hey, Zack finished for the night?” I guess as I bump into him.
“Yeah, busy tonight, you enjoying your night?” He asks looking around the club.
“Yes, it’s been one to remember anyway”
“Wanna dance?” he asks looking uncomfortable just standing around by the dance
floor.
“Sure” I reply as I take his hand and follow him onto the dance floor.
“What’s wrong? You don’t look all that happy?” I ask frowning when I look up and
see he’s distracted.
“I had an argument with Bex” He sighs frustrated.
“You’ll be fine”
“I don’t think we will, it was a pretty big one” he shakes his head frowning and I
guess that he’s running through the argument in his head.
 “Honey arguing isn’t all bad in a relationship” I assure him
“How so?” he asks hopefully
“What comes with arguing?” I ask
He appears to think it over for a second “Make-up sex” he says with a nod of his
head making me laugh
“True, but apart from that?”
“A headache” he replies straightaway.
“No. Passion. You both argue because you love each other. You’re hurting now the
same as she is because you have the power to be able to hurt each other, you can
only hurt someone if they care about you. It’s when you no longer care enough to
argue that you want to worry” I assure him
“I guess you’re right” he smiles and then starts twirling me around the dance floor
making me giggle and people cheer as we go past them. After a few laps around the
dance floor the music switches to a slow song and I glance over at the table all my
friends are sat at, I’ve kept an eye on it during dancing and Louise did exactly what I
asked and somehow managed to give Tucker all her attention without making
anything seem obvious now she is sat on his lap and giggling as he whispers
something in her ear.
“I don’t know about you but I’m ready to go home now” I sigh happily at Zack and
we say our goodbyes. I head over to the table but come to a complete stop when I
see Tucker kissing Louise. I know this is what I planned and what I wanted to happen
but I didn’t want to see it and I seem unable to tear my eyes away from what’s
happening in front me. I have the sudden urge to throw up but hold my stomach and
force a smile on to my face as I reach the table.
“I’m heading home now, I’ll leave the key out for you in the usual place guys” I say
to Sophie and Matt.
I manage to thank and say goodbye to the whole table without looking at Tucker
when he says his goodbye to me I concentrate on the area in between his eyes
instead of looking at them directly.
 Chapter Twenty

The next morning as I curl up on the sofa and pull my legs under me I use my
coffee cup to warm my hands.
I’m aware that I look like crap and got next to no sleep thanks to the nightmares
keeping me up most of the night. I suppose they have come back because it’s this
time of year again. Twelve years today since my dad died. I’m going to make the
three hour drive and go visit his grave today. The only thing is for the last two nights
I’ve been having nightmares now.
Ever since Tucker came back in to my life.
A few moments later I’m joined by Sophie and Matt.
“You’re not still mad at me are you?” Sophie asks worrying her bottom lip, it’s then
I realize I’m frowning.
“No don’t worry about it, I was thinking that’s all” I smile weakly at her.
“I know what you were doing last night” She says softly. She never could see past
any of my plans.
“I really don’t want to talk about it” I shake my head at her “I have something I
need to do today, so I won’t be around. In fact I won’t be back until my shift at the
club tonight”
“Umm OKAY…” Matt says looking at me curiously
“Help yourself to food and everything, there are clean towels and stuff upstairs,
you know where everything is and I’ll meet you at the club tonight”
“You’re not going to do anything st….” Sophie is cut off when my phone rings and I
grab it smiling not needing to check the screen to know who it is.
“Happy Birthday”
“It’s a day late ... but whatever” I smile into the phone.
“Will you forgive me?”
“I love you so you can get away with stuff like that” I assure him
“What time am I meeting you today?” he asks not needing to check if I’m definitely
going.
“Umm how about for lunch, I have to be back here by seven?”
“Sure sounds great, can’t wait to see you Brooke”
“Same, I have a lot to tell you” I smile.
“Good night then huh?” he teases
“Well I got drunk” I say not answering directly making him laugh as he hangs up.
“I didn’t know you were seeing someone” Matt smiles at me making me laugh and
shake my head as I head upstairs to start the emotion rollercoaster that will be today.

Hey Dad
It’s me again, another year has past without you and surprise, surprise I’m still
here and missing you as usual. I won’t say it’s easier as the years go on but I think I
know how to handle it a bit better now. I had a good birthday last night, well half a
good birthday. Tucker’s moved into the same town as me … and as if that’s not
enough he is in a band that plays at my club every weekend. You remember Tucker?
he’s the one who broke my heart. But he’s also the one who saved my life. It’s easier
to be around him now. I suppose I have you to thank for that in some strange way.
Missing you everyday and loving you everyday but not being able to be with you kind
of helps me be around him. Sophie and Matt have come up for a visit so I’m sure we
will have some fun over the next few days. I wrote mum another letter saying that I
was sorry for everything but I still haven’t had a reply. Though I don’t write a return
address on them because I don’t want them to know where I live.
 Will say’s “Hi big fella” by the way, he’s been taking good care of me and I’m glad
you had him in you’re life, even if it wasn’t for as long as it should have been. He
keeps me in line though and I know that tonight no matter what sort of fool I make of
myself in front of a hundred people he will be there for me. Everyone at the club
expects it now though after last year. Well I have to go because Sophie can hear me
crying and she’s going to check on me. So I’ll see you later and I’ll give you a hug.
Miss you ever day but love you more every day.
Your baby girl
Brooke.
xxxxx

As if she can read what I was writing Sophie pushes my door open just as I’m
putting my letter into an envelope and in my bag. I wipe away my tears and offer a
weak smile. She tries to bring me into a hug but I step around her knowing that it will
only make me breakdown and then I’d never be able to leave here.
Calling out a goodbye over my shoulder I jog out of the house and hop into my car.

I force a smile as I make my way through the club and the regulars greet me.
Pushing through the crowd until I climb over the bar I silently beg myself to be able
to hold it together long enough to get through the night. As soon as I spot Will
heading towards me, I know that’s not going to happen. I turn my attention away
from him and wave to Cam and Derek who are being served by Lucy.
“Hey” he greets as he pulls me into a hug “How are you feeling?”
“I’m getting there, I think. It’s been a long day” I admit squeezing him back.
“I know darling, I miss him too, not as much as you, but I do miss him. He was a
good man”
“I know” I nod and sniff back the sob chocking me.
“He’d be proud of you, you know that right” He says releasing me and I notice his
eyes are filling up, he turns and walks away as I wipe my own tears away and turn to
start serving drinks. I hold back a sigh as Tucker is the first person I need to serve.
“You okay Brooke?” he asks watching the tears roll down my cheeks as I silently
get him a bottle from the fridge. “Hey, what’s up? Don’t cry” he says softy as he
wipes my cheeks with his thumb.
“Don’t” is all I say, causing him to frown down at me “Please” I beg and turn to the
next customer.
I manage to get through serving as many people as I can to help clear the queue
without completely breaking down, I only manage this by not looking at anyone I
know. About half an hour later Will pulls me up onto the bar and passes me a mic.
“Are you ready Brooke?” he asks silencing the club.
“Let’s get it over with” I say defeated.
“Hey now, we don’t rush this” he scolds me playfully, which gets a small smile from
me. “As you all know it was Brooke’s birthday yesterday and she chose to celebrate it
with all the people she loves, that is all of you guys” he tells the crowd and is
rewarded by a loud cheer. “But now she asks you all to go easy on her tonight, she’s
not real happy tonight guys because the one man Brooke loves and wanted to be
here last night couldn’t make it so we need to do our best to try and cheer her up” he
pulls me under his arm and kisses my forehead soothingly as another tear rolls down
my cheek. Andrew joins us on the bar looking confused and worried as he stands next
to me. The DJ puts on ‘Bed of roses’ so it’s its soft background music and before I can
stop it from happening I’m transported back to the night before my life turned to hell.
“Sing to me daddy” I giggle up at him as I snuggle down into my bed.
“What do you want me to sing baby girl” he whispers softly kissing my head.
 “The one about the flowers” I beg making him chuckle.
“The truth is baby your all that I need” I giggle as he starts the song not from the
beginning but from my favorite part, it’s our tradition. “I wanna lay you down in a bed
of roses…tonight I sleep on a bed of nails … I want to be just as close as the holy
ghost is … and lay you down on bed of roses…
“Well I’m so far away … That each step I take is on my way home”
I can hear the cry the rip through me before it even leaves my lips. I watch as
Sophie, Matt and Tucker all run towards me and Andrew grips me into a hug. “I need
…” I gasp.
“You need what honey?” he asks soothingly.
“The… the … the song” I try again.
“What about it?”
“Turn it off” I beg as I try to control my sobs and stop the memories that come
back to me as the chorus plays again. I hear Andrew say something to someone.
“You turned eleven today baby. You know what that means don’t you”
I nod up at him and put on a serious face “It means I’m a grown up now”
I smile as his soft laughter washes over me.
“It means you’re a big girl now” he says as he tickles me.
“Wait you’re not going to leave me are you?”
“No baby, I’ll never leave you silly. I love you”
“I’m going to marry a man exactly like you when I’m proper grown up cause you’re
the best daddy” I wrap my arms around his neck.
“No, you’re the best sweetie and I’d kill anyone who ever tells you any different”
“No one would dare when my dads so big and strong” I giggle when he lifts his
arms flexes his muscles letting me plant a kiss on them. ”Your funny daddy”
“I wish we could stay in this night forever baby” He says tucking me into bed
properly.
“Why?” I ask and feel my eyebrows pull in.
“Because I never want you to grow up and move away from me. I want to keep
you sweet and innocent like this forever” he says simply and kisses my nose one last
time.
“Nigh daddy, Love you always”
“Sweet dreams baby. Love you forever” he says from the doorway and watches
me as I feel my eyes grow heavy. That was the last time I ever saw him.
I focus my eyes on the club and everyone is watching me, the DJ has changed the
background music to an eighties pop song I note gratefully. Matt, Tucker and Sophie
are all watching me, stood on the bar now themselves. I pull away from Andrews hug
and wipe away my tears again.
“Happy Birthday baby girl” he kisses my cheek and folds something small into my
hand.
“What is it daddy?” I ask opening my eyes, we’re in the kitchen, everyone else is
out the back at my birthday party.
“It’s a special present just for you from me. You have to promise that you will look
after it and never tell mummy about it OKAY” he’s looking into my eyes I’m not sure
why so I just nod and run up to my bedroom. I open my hand and pick up the yellow
necklace its a little heart.
I lower myself to my knees on the bar and clutch at the chain that still hangs
around my neck.
I open the heart and read the message inside. “Never give up on what you love” I
don’t really know what it means but I know I love my dad and I would never give up
on him so I hide my special present inside a sock and hide it under my mattress. I will
only take it out when I move away.
I shake my head to get rid of the memories. Tucker’s crouched in front of me.
“Are you OKAY Brooke?” he asks softly.
Looking into his eyes I’m reminded that everyone who has claimed to love or care
for me has left me no choice but to carry on my own no matter what they are leaving
me with.
“What have you done?” My step dad screams at me holding up a bloodied bed
sheet.
“I don’t know it happened last night” I cower away from him, I’m sure why I feel
scared but my body is telling me to protect myself my step father has always creeped
me out but never scared me before.
“I knew it wouldn’t take much longer” he snarls at me, I curl myself into a ball on
my bed not sure what’s going on with my body but he doesn’t like it.
“It’s not my fault, I didn’t mean it to happen ... I’m sorry” I’m crying now.
“It is your fault” his voice is soft now as he walks over to me. “You’re a whore” He
lands a punch on me making me scream out. “Remember that” he says from my
doorway then leave me to cry.
I flinch and clutch my stomach involuntarily remembering the very first time he hit
me.
Tucker is still waiting for me to answer his question I realize. This is what my dad
left me to live through. Did he not care? I nod up at Tucker and he pulls me up taking
his place behind me.
“Let’s do this” I croak into my mic at Will who nods at me and we all turn as Lucy
hands us all a shot of my dads’ favorite drink. Jack Daniels.
I don’t like it but it’s the only thing I will be drinking tonight and it will get me drunk
enough to forget at least for a night.
“Go ahead Brooke” Will encourages me gesturing to my mic. I turn to face the
crowd and take a deep breath getting ready for the hardest part.
“As you have all noticed I’m a bit of a mess tonight. I’m sorry for being depressing
but like a trooper I’m going to bring you all down with me. If any of you have ever
loved someone, you know how good that feels. That one person, who can make
everything OKAY with just a smile, can make you laugh when you just want to cry.
Makes you understand why you are alive when you just want to end it. That person
who no matter what happens will always be there for you. The one who will do every
thing he can to make sure you never get hurt… But then you wake up and that
person isn’t there for you anymore. When they are no longer around to make you
laugh or hold you when you cry. Not there to tell you everything will be okay when
clearly it isn’t going to be. Not there to see you through the painful nights. I’ll tell you
what happened. You got lied to. Plain and simply you got fooled. But do you know
what? We don’t need anyone, no one is there for you forever, no matter how much
they promise they will be” I look around and ignore the confused looks I am getting.
“So I ask you to raise your glasses full of this disgusting drink and join me in a toast.
To the lies that break your fucking heart” I shout as I throw my drink back and cringe
as it burns my throat.
“Jesus, bad break up?” Andrew asks me but looks at the crowd frowning as he
catches the eye of every man I have ever spoken to.
“Sorry Brooke but I’m going to argue, your toast.” Will says into his mic looking
determined.
“He never lied to you”
“Yes he did” I reply stubbornly swirling around to face him, I can feel my hand
holding the mic shaking. Sophie, Matt and Andrew all step aside so I can see Will
clearly. “You don’t know that”
 “He loved you” he insists “Still does”
“Who?” Andrew and Sophie ask at the same looking between me and Will.
“If he loved me, he wouldn’t have left”
“He had no choice” he says softly.
“There’s always a choice” I snap back at him.
“He was having an affair Brooke” he informs me.
“What?” I screech making everyone wince and I take a step toward him. My dad
was happy he loved me; he would never leave me for someone else. Even if he
wasn’t happy with my mum.
“He loved you, of course he did. But he was having an affair with someone else up
here, She was pregnant” he says sadly. “He had to leave to raise the baby, he had no
choice”
I lift my leg to lunge at him for saying such a ridiculous lie about my dad. He told
me he loved me! He wouldn’t leave me for someone else. I’m sure of it. I saw the
look in his eyes when he looked at me. You can’t fake that kind of love. Before my
foot reaches the ground I’m pulled back with my arms around my back. “Let me go
Tucker” I growl up at him. He shakes his head at me keeping his eyes on Will.
“Why are you telling me this?” I yell out at Will who made no attempt to step back
from my attack.
“Because, you think he didn’t love you. He did, he just had no choice but to leave.
I’m sorry Brooke. It’s over”
“Who is she?” I demand. “Do I know her?”
He nods his head at me. “You’ve met her and her son”
I scan quickly through the people I have met that have a twelve year old son. Will’s
wife and son drift to the front of my mind and feel the blood drain from my head as I
remember looking at his son, there was something familiar about him when I met
him but I ignored it. It’s been under my nose this whole time. He looks exactly like my
dad just with his mothers eyes.
“You bastard” I whisper but I know he has heard me because he winces.
“I’m so sorry Brooke” he says and then jumps from the bar. I watch as he leaves
the club. I try to run after him but Tuckers hold on me is too tight. I struggle against
him but he doesn’t let go instead he lowers us both off the bar and walks me into the
office. I hear the music go up around the club again. He doesn’t let me go until Matt
comes into the office and stands in front of the door. As soon as he lets me go I make
a run for the door but Matt stops me. Frustrated I walk over to Wills desk and pick up
the frame that holds a photo of his family. Looking at it closely now I can’t see how I
ever missed the resemblance. Crying, I throw the frame at the wall and as it smashes
I hit the ground putting my head in my knees and cry like I haven’t since the day he
died. The boys let me cry it out and no one says anything until there’s a knock at the
door, Matt lets Sophie in and she hands me a glass of water and a shot of something
I’m not sure what it is but I don’t care anymore.
“Well I think you need to find a new job” Sophie says nudging my shoulder with her
own.
“Why?” I sniff “Has everyone left?”
“Ummm no but you just tried to attack your boss” she explains.
“Will isn’t my boss, I’m his. I’m the owner. He’s the manager” I shrug when they all
stare at me open mouthed. “I saved a lot by being the quiet girl in uni and I had an
inheritance that I invested. It did well”
“Oh” Is all she says.
“Want to tell me what that was all about?” she asks nervously.
“Not really no”
 “Well whoever it was I’m sure he was an asshole” Matt put in.
“No, it’s my own fault I’m not enough, never enough” I sigh getting up.
“When I asked you last night if you’ve … you know … since …” she trails off.
“It’s not like that” I shake my head at her knowing where her thoughts have taken
her.
“Are you going to be okay?” Tucker asks watching me closely.
“Everything I’ve ever known is a lie. Who knows maybe everyone is right and I
really am just a whore, I should remember that” I shrug and walk out of the office
leaving them speechless knowing that all three of them have called me a whore at
some point.
I take another shot of Jack Daniels just to prove a point, what that point is I don’t
know but I know I want to prove it, I jump up on the bar and grab the mic the music
stops and I don’t turn around when I hear the office door open and then close a few
seconds later.
“Okay everyone, enough of the depressing” they cheer making me smile “Half of
my life has been a lie, the other half I have spent being the little good girl you all
know so well, I say lets get rid of the bullshit, it’s time to be a bit naughty, what do
you think?” I shout and laugh when they all cheer and clap. “Who’s going to get
naughty with me?” I ask and wince slightly as about seventy “me” screams go up
around the club loudly.
“How naughty are we talking?” Andrew asks on the bar with me once again.
“How naughty can you handle?” I ask smirking at him.
“I can handle you honey” he grins back at me.
“Wanna bet?” I ask making him and everyone around us laugh.
“OKAY, OKAY, I like where this is going, let’s turn this into a challenge. Lucy help us
out here please” he pulls her up before he has a chance to refuse and passes her a
mic. “You set the challenges and overall looser has to do a forfeit and remember the
naughtier the better” he winks at me.
“OKAY guys, first one to get back on the bar without an item of clothing, you can’t
remove it yourself though” Lucy commands. “Go!” the crowd erupts and Andrew
smirks at me as he makes his way towards a group of women, I turn around and eye
Lucy, Matt and Tucker then jump down in front of them.
“You owe me” I say to Tucker laughing at his expression.
“What did I do?” he smiles at me probably thankful that my dark mood has now
been forgotten.
“You held me back from hitting Will. Now come on get on with it!” I instruct still
laughing.
“What do you want me to do?” he asks nervously.
I unbutton my shirt and tie it then pull my shorts down a touch so the top of my
thong is showing “Rip it off” I instruct straight faced “I know you can do it” grinning he
does it and hands me my underwear. I jump back on the bar laughing at a topless
Andrew trying to get back to the bar but being pulled back by women.
“We have a winner!” Lucy yells and everyone cheers at me.
“No we don’t she hasn’t taken anything off!” Andrew complains when he’s back on
the bar. I pass him my underwear and laugh as he looks impressed.
“It’s one – nil to Brooke” she announces
“Uhh did you hear that? That sounds good!” I tease
“OKAY so you each get one song to impress a member of the opposite sex” She
challenges.
“Are we allowed to have sex?” Andrew asks making everyone laugh.
“No” Lucy laughs. “Now go” she says as the DJ starts playing “Dirrty” I jump down
off the bar and head towards the stage on my way I grab Derek’s hand and pull him
up off his chair when he’s standing I grab his chair as well and pull him onto the
stage. He’s laughing when I sit him down but as soon as I start giving him a lap dance
his laughter fades. I dance around him and on him for the whole song then stand
when it finishes. I look around but can’t spot Andrew.
“How’d he do?” Lucy asks a brunette in the crowd it’s then I notice that he’s stood
behind her. She puts her thumbs up and smiles.
“How’d Brooke do Derek?” Lucy asks turning everyone attention to us.
“He grins and nods at her” I kiss his cheek and he grabs my head to whisper in my
ear. “Umm I kind of need to stay here for a bit” I laugh as I pull away and understand
what he means.
“Do you want to come up and tell us how good she did?” Lucy asks him.
He shifts in his chair and shakes his head grinning sheepishly. The whole club
laughs and I’m announced the winner of that round as well.
We meet back at the bar and straddle it instead on standing on it as Lucy gives us
our last challenge.
“OKAY so last challenge of the night. You both need to turn on someone from the
opposite sex but you’re not aloud to touch them” Who’s going to go first?” she asks.
“I will” I announce into my mic and give my full attention to Andrew who grins at
me.
“Do your worst baby” he says into his mic.
I scoot a little closer to him and lift my mic talking softly in it getting the attention
of everyone in the club.
“Imagine we’re in my bedroom… I walk up to you slowly and start undressing you,
once I have you completely naked I push you down on the bed and crawl over you, as
I’m hovering above you I start undressing myself … I lean in … my face just inches
from yours … I move slowly, bringing our mouths closer together … I touch my lips to
yours and run my tongue over your bottom lip… I move my head to trail kisses along
your jaw … behind your ear … down your neck … stopping to suck softly at your
collar bone … I keep moving and run my lips and tongue over your chest … I softly
kiss my way down your belly … my hair tickling you as I go … I slip my tongue inside
your belly button and suck softly … I run my hands up your thighs and trails kisses
across you from hip to hip watching as your cock starts twitching … I keep kissing
around it … never touching … I go further down and kiss the inside of your thighs …
still avoiding the one place you want my mouth … I run my tongue over your balls
and my breath on them causes you to shiver … I finally give in and run my tongue up
the length of you … I push the head of your cock into my mouth and suck softly …
Running my tongue around the tip in circles I look up and watch you watch me …
Cupping your balls I move up onto my knees and take your cock into my mouth …
slowly … deeply … savoring the taste of you … I start moving back and for … sucking
and licking … I can feel you growing even harder in my mouth … You taste so good ..
it’s making me wet … I moan into your cock … making your cock vibrate with my
voice … with one last push I take you all the way down to the core … I slowly release
you and sit up … hovering over you and I push myself up with my hands …
Anticipation is thick in the air … both of us know what’s going to happen … and it
does … slowly … I take you in my hand … I rub the tip of you around my wet entrance
… I slowly lower myself onto you … It feels so good … you … filling me completely …”
I look up at Lucy “Is that enough or shall I continue?”
“Uh … that’s enough” Andrew says quietly. The crowd starts chanting “continue”
but I laugh at the looks all the men are sending me, well everyone man apart from
Matt.
“Your turn” I say sweetly to Andrew.
 “I’m not going to even bother trying to beat that. You win” he says tightly and
drops down off the bar and heads into the office
“Need a hand?” I call after him making all the girls laugh.
Lucy jumps down off the bar and hi fives me still laughing as she starts to serve
drinks.
“I’m going to need you to marry me” Jamie announces as I get the band their
drinks.
“You’d get bored” I assure him
“Eighty percent of the men in this club will be fantasizing about you tonight” he
informs me.
“Great” I laugh at them; they all look at me like I’m clueless.
“You’re going to make some bastard a very happy man one day” Cam tells me
with a hint of adoration in his voice.
I shake my head at them as they all look at me in awe. “I’m just me guys, I only do
it for fun, I like to have a good time that’s all. It’s nothing special” I inform them.
“Punch me” He instructs Tucker who has just joined us at the bar with Sophie and
Matt.
“Why?”
“Because there is no way she is real” he insists making me roll my eyes.
“She’s real alright” Tucker informs them setting of Sophie into a fit of giggles.
“Hard to believe she’s only had sex…” I cut her off with a glare. “Umm yeah …
she’s real” she finishes lamely.
“I just like playing” I shrug at the boys avoiding Tuckers eye who is watching me
intently.
“If that’s what you call it, call me anytime you’re feeling playful” Cam says
seriously.
“We need to have sex right now; I go back on what I said last night. You can have
your bet” Andrew says grabbing me from behind by my hips and spinning me to face
him.
“That wasn’t what I bet you last night” I insist.
“No you said I got to choose the guy you had sex with” he reminds me “I choose
me” he says simply.
“You tired betting that you could have sex with someone last night?” Sophie shouts
at me making a few people turn and pay attention to our conversation.
“No the bet was whather or not the guy would still be with me in the morning” I
defend.
“Why would you bet that?” she demands at me while Jamie turns to Andrew
“Why wouldn’t you let her take that bet?” he demands offended for all men.
“I’m not going to stop her having sex with anyone, but I wasn’t going to let her do it
for the reason it would have been for last night” he says sternly to Sophie.
“So after I spoke with you and you stormed off … that’s what you meant by ending
it?” She asks.
“Can we not discuss my sex life please?” I beg and walk away from them.
“So you had sex with Tucker” Lucy says behind me when I start serving a few
customers.
“What are you talking about Luce?” I ask bored
“I thought it was Andrew but after you left I heard him and Sophie talking about
you”
“Do you want to do me a favor?” I ask a group of girls that have just come up to
the bar wearing nurse outfits, a hen night or birthday party I assume. “Take this tray
of shots over to those guys there would you, and don’t tell them it’s from me” I say
gesturing to the band and watch as they take the tray over giggling.
“What did you hear Luce?” I ask turning my attention to her.
“They were talking about you, I only heard bits of the conversation but I got the gist
of it”
“Why were they talking about me, wasn’t they occupied?” I ask remembering
Louise and Tucker kissing when I left.
“Nope they were talking about you. So what did he do?” she’s giving me her full
attention now and is obviously intrigued.
“What do you mean?” cautious not sure what she’d heard.
“Well apparently he did something big and hurt you; you stormed out that’s why
you moved here to get away from him. And now he’s followed you here but you both
just act like new friends”
“I didn’t move out here because of him” I insist “I moved here for a lot of reasons”
“I guess you two have some catching up to do” she smirks at me.
“I am so not talking about this. Way too many people are interested in my sex life”
I mutter.
“Oooh cute guy coming this way” she says quietly.
“I know him” I reply as I take in the man walking towards us. “You know there is
definitely something sexy about a lip ring. I don’t know why, I don’t even like them but
they are sexy” I sigh.
“Bet you’d like to suck on that” she smirks at me making me blush and the man
grin as he reaches us.
“Umm ... hi ... again ... what can I do for you?” I stutter blushing again because I
can’t take my eyes off the silver ring in his lip, making him raise an eyebrow at me
and Lucy burst out laughing and Sophie and Andrew turn their attention to us. I clear
my throat. “Sorry, weird night, what can I get you?” I ask again more steadily this
time making Lucy laugh harder and head over to my group of friends at the end of
the bar.
“A beers fine” he smiles at me making me melt a little as his blue eyes light up with
his smile.
“Sure” I say distracting myself with getting his drink.
“So you work here?” he asks looking over at me.
“Umm no I own it, there’s no way I’d get away with half the stuff I do around here
otherwise” I admit.
“And that would be?” he’s back to grinning now making me blush for some reason
unknown.
“Oh you know, dancing on the bar, always loosing bets and having to do
embarrassing things, throwing tantrums, doing dares, body shots, and lap dances” I
shrug at him.
“Sounds like a lot of fun to be around” he takes a swig of he beer and points it at
me “I’ll be back in ten, have to find my friends” he turns to leave and I lean against
the bar and sigh dramatically I hear Lucy laugh and turn to glare at her, I notice then
that the whole group has been watching me. I blush again and stomp over to them.
“It’s not funny” I poke her in the side “Don’t leave me alone like that again” I
complain.
“Why it’s not my fault he has something you want to run your tongue over” she
chuckles
“You’re so dirty! Your mother would be ashamed” I admonish. “Look he’s coming
back once he’s found his friends, please don’t leave me alone with them” I beg
“Why not? He’s hot” she says.
 “I know but that guy had me blushing before he even spoke a word to me, half an
hour with the guy and I’d be naked on my back”
“And the problem is?” she taunts
“I don’t have sex with strangers” I snap
“You said you knew him”
“I know him which is why I don’t want to have sex with him. I’ve been someone’s
one night stand before I’m not going to do it again” I say and snap my mouth shut
when I see Sophie and tucker wince making me blush again. I throw my hands up to
my cheeks and feel the heat coming from them.
“He’s coming back, I bet that ring would do wonders in certain places” Lucy teases
and my whole face catches fire and everyone laughs again.
“Oh my god! All this over a fucking lip ring!” I moan and walk to into the office to
attempt to calm down.
The door opens but I don’t bother looking up, I hear the click of the lock and tap
my foot on the floor waiting for the lecture to start. I’m met with silence so I huff.
“Get on with it Soph”
“It’s not Sophie” A deep voice replies making me snap my head up.
“What are you doing in here Tucker?” I sigh resigned.
“I’ve missed you Soph” He says simply not moving from the doorway.
“Can we not do this now? I’ve had quite an emotional day”
“It’s been two years” he says aloud but it sounds more like a thought.
“I’m aware of that” I say as I get up and walk towards him planning on leaving the
office, he steps aside for me to get passed but as soon as I’m in front of the door I
hear two thuds, I look up to see he has his hands on either side of my head on the
door. I close my eyes and take a deep breath before I turn around. “What’s this
about?” I ask looking up at him.
“I know what you’re doing I just don’t know why” he says staring into my eyes.
“What am I doing?” I frown
“Every time a conversation gets onto a certain topic … or someone says something
cryptic, you walk away and moments later I’m surrounded by women…. Why?” He
asks quietly.
I try to keep my expression blank but I’m not sure if he can see past it, he always
used to be able to.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about” I shrug.
“I think you do …” he trails off as his eyes move from mine down to my lips. I try to
swallow but my mouth has gone dry.
“Tucker I…” and his mouth is on mine, his tongue is in my mouth stroking mine
causing me to melt into the door. The kiss starts off slowly but emotion quickly takes
over. I wrap my arms around his neck and pull his face closer to mine as I pour all of
the pain, heartbreak, humiliation, Broken trust and love into the kiss. He returns the
kiss with just as much fervor and then our hands are everywhere, fumbling with
buttons and belts. I’m not sure who takes off what but soon enough we are both
naked still pressed up against the door. He lowers his hands to my hips and lifts as I
wrap them around his waist, One minute we are unable to keep our mouths apart in
the next he is moving inside me and I’m letting out the loudest moan I have ever
heard.
“Oh god” I groan and throw my head back hitting it against the door as he starts
moving faster.
“Did I mention how much I’ve missed you?” he asks tightly through gritted teeth. I
have no reply as he moves his lips across my jaw stopping at the sweet spot just
below my ear, I moan again and tighten around him making him groan. It’s been two
years since I’ve had sex so I’m actually impressed that I’ve lasted this long, but I
know I’m not going to be able to carry on much longer I can already feel the orgasm
building. He shifts slightly and I tighten again. He kisses my neck and then wraps his
lips around it and sucks slightly.
“Oh … My … God …” I pant unable to gather any embarrassment.
My orgasm starts building and I don’t even attempt to stop the moans that are
coming from me, he doesn’t seem to mind though because he picks up speed and as
soon the orgasm starts rolling through me he sucks a bit harder and curses as I
scream his name, seconds later he finds his own release and lowers up to the floor
both panting. So many emotions are running through me that I can’t even being to
explain them or tell them apart. I’m not sure what to say, I’m not sure if there is
anything to say. I know there’s a conversation we need to have but I’d like to avoid it
all costs. I sit against the door and bang my head back on it with my eyes closed, not
sure what to think now. Thankfully I don’t have to when someone knocks the door,
my eyes fly open.
“Yeah?” I ask forcing my voice to be normal.
“There’s someone here to see you Brooke, its important” Matt says through the
door. I frown as I try to think who it could be.
“Who is it?” I ask nervously.
“Just open the door Brooke” he says impatiently.
I look to Tucker who shrugs at me and we both pull our clothes on just as I finish
tying my shirt he walks over to me.
“Umm … you might … want to … umm …” he points to my neck “I marked you …
sorry” he smiles guiltily at me. I pull my clip back out of my hair and pull it over my
shoulder to cover the mark.
“Ready?” I ask looking over the office to make sure we haven’t left any evidence of
our ... what-ever that was. He nods at me so I unlock and pull the door open. Matt
does a double-take when he sees Tucker in the office behind me. He takes in my
outfit and notices I’ve taken my hair down, I roll my eyes as I watch his lips twitch
with amusement.
“Who’s here to see me?” I ask impatiently.
He steps aside to reveal Phin. He has a cut above his eye brow; it’s not fresh but
clearly only a day or two old. I take a step back shaking my head and feel Tuckers
hands on my shoulders stopping me from backing away from him any further.
“Who are you here with?” I ask Phin quietly.
He shifts from foot to foot for a while before meeting my eyes “I’m alone” he
confirms.
“Why are you here?” I ask confused, this night can’t get any stranger.
“I needed to get away … like you did” he says quietly.
“How did you find me?” I ask worried now that they all know where I am.
“I followed you earlier and when you met your boyfriend for lunch I heard you tell
him where you were going so I got on a train”
“Boyfriend?” Matt and Tucker ask at the same time.
“It was Luke” I say dismissively. “Did you tell anyone where you were going?” I ask
turning my attention back to Phin.
He just shakes his head at me.
“Okay let me think a minute” I say to no one in particular and take a seat at the
desk.
“You went back there?” Matt asks referring to the town we all went to university to.
“Yeah” I answer not paying too much attention.
“Why?” Tucker asks just as confused.
 “Twelve years today” I answer.
“I’m lost” Matt says making me roll my eyes.
“Twelve years ago today my dad died” I explain as I try to think of a way how to
sort to the Phin situation. I can’t take him back because I’m not going anywhere near
their house. I can’t have them going to my house. I’ll have to get them to come to the
club. Unless I can get someone else to take him home.
“You know a lot about tonight makes sense now” Matt says sounding relieved.
“Give me your phone” I say to Phin holding out my hand as he comes towards me
cautiously.
I dial the number and close my eyes as I prepare myself to speak to the people
that ruined my life. Please don’t be him I chant to myself as the dial tone changes to
ringing. I have no such luck.
“Hello?” he answers finally.
“Hi” Is all I say knowing that’s all it will take for him to recognize my voice.
“What do you want?” he snarls in my ear
“You need to come and pick up your son” I say not giving into the shiver that
threatens to rock my whole body at the thought of him coming here.
“What do you mean? Where is he?” he shouts making me wince.
“He’s just turned up at my work”
“OKAY give me the address I’ll leave now”
I tell him the address and to meet me by the bar.
“Cant wait to see you again” he says sarcastically into the phone before hanging
up.
“Ugh I think I’m going to be sick” I say to the phone as I hand it back to Phin “He’ll
be here in three hours, you can stay in here and I’ll come get you when he gets here”
I tell him.
“Can’t I live with you? I hate it there. I hate them” he whines.
“I wish I could help you, but I can’t. Sorry kiddo you got two choices. You either
phone the police and or social services if he’s hitting you or you stick it out till your old
enough to move out” I say sympathetically.
“Wait you mean that was just ...” Matt asks.
“Yeap that was my step dad” I finish for him.
“Which means you’re …” Tucker says staring at Phin. Then I remember our
argument before I left was over him.
“This is Phin, my brother from another daddy” I emphasize the word brother and
he visibly cringes shooting me an apologetic look.
“Come on we better get back out there” I say to Matt and Tucker as I start making
my way to the door “Il send in a drink for you Phin, stay put. No trying to escape.
Don’t make me chase you around please.” I call over my shoulder.
Lucy and Sophie watch us as we return to the bar and they also do a double take
when they notice Tucker with us. Honestly how did no one see him go in when he
needs to go behind the bar to get there?
“Umm everything OKAY?” Sophie asks having seen Matt bring in Phin.
“Weirdest night ever” I shake my head at them and climb onto the bar, noticing me
the DJ shuts the music off and everyone turns to me.
“Hey guys, having a good night?” I call out to everyone and listen to their cheers
and shouts “Because you are all so amazing at putting up with me we will be staying
open an extra two hours tonight” I announce making them go wild. “I have to pop out
for half hour in a minute but when I get back I will give you all a round on the house,
just because I’m that nice” I announce and get another cheer. I turn to see Lucy and
Sophie deep in discussion below me. “While I’m out Lucy will be in charge so be nice
to her guys, get up here and say hello Luce” I gesture for her to join and she does
eagerly sharing a smile with Sophie and grabs a mic.
“Hey guys” she waves to them all. “Since I’m in charge, I say Brooke does one of
her weekly bar dances before she goes, what do you think?” she asks but her eyes
are focused on someone in the crowd and I follow her gaze to the man with the lip
ring.
“Oh no, not tonight” I say in the mic playing it off but I’m actually serious.
“What’s the matter? Haven’t got the energy?” she asks smiling at me knowingly. I
look beyond her and glare at Matt for having a big mouth and stomp over to Lucy.
“That’s not the reason” I protest.
“Then what other reason is there?” she asks smiling sweetly.
I lower my mic and lean into her ear “I have no underwear on, if I bend over or
lower by self, like I normally do spreading my knee’s I’m going to be showing a lot of
people something I don’t want them to see” I remind her making her bend over
laughing, laughing so hard she has tears running down her face. Of course I blush.
“Come on Brooke, don’t be a spoil sport” Andrew calls from behind me teasingly. I
shake my head at him adamantly while Lucy tries to control her laughing.
“I’m sorry Brooke but you do put yourself in these situations” she points out still
laughing.
I just huff and fold my arms across my stomach.
“Why won’t she do it?” Sophie asks Lucy curiously. Lucy bends down and explains
to her only loud enough for her to hear. I watch as Sophie’s eyes widen she snorts
and slaps her hand to her mouth trying to hold in her laugh. She then explains to Matt
who grins at me and shakes his head.
“While you lot discuss that, and take a great deal of time taking advantage of all
the jokes you can make about this. Which you will no doubt do. I really do have to go
and when I come back I will do the bar dance” Once I have finished my
announcement I jump down from the bar and head home.

I go in the back entrance to the club and store my clothes in the staff toilets. I
check my outfit over in the mirror and smile at my dress, it has a turtle neck (to cover
the mark Tucker left) it has no sleeves so the top is styled like a man’s tank top, but
skin tight and flows down into a skater style skirt. It is white with dramatic black
flowers strategically placed in various places. I have black ankle boots on with a six
inch heel and my hair is in two ponytails just below my ears. On my head rests a black
cowboy hat. When I enter the bar no one notices me, my group of friends are all
facing away from the bar, waiting for me to return that way so I climb on the bar and
press my finger to my lips to the people who have noticed me for them to remain
silent and I grab a mic and gesture for the DJ. Since the first night I did the bar dance
‘bad girlfriend’ has become my theme song for this so as the first few beats come
through I lift my mic up and scream “oooowww” into it and then start dancing. I
watch as my friends all turn at one and stare up at me. I throw them a wink and they
all stare at me dumbfounded.
I play it up and wink at a few of the men watching me and blow a kiss to the man
with the lip ring. I dance down to the end of the bar where the gang are all watching
me and dip my self low so I’m eye level with them all and put my hat on Sophie’s
head before bring myself back up slowly and laugh down at Derek and Cam as they
try to close there mouth but fail when they keep dropping back open. Shaking my
head I do a last twirl as the song comes to an end. I’m greeted with claps, shouts of
‘encore’ and cheers.
“Was it worth the wait?” I ask the crowd laughing “Free round time!” I announce
before get back down off the bar with Lucy’s help.
 “Men are so easy to entertain” I sigh amazed as I watch the crowd move in closer
to the bar.
“Helps when you put on a show like that” Jamie notes.
“I’m just messing about” I shrug used to the reaction of men by now.
“Which is one of the reasons I love you” Sophie grins putting the hat back on my
head.
“Won’t be long” I call over my shoulder and head out to check on Phin. He’s
sleeping on the chair in the office. I walk closer to him as quietly as I can trying not to
disturb him and inspect him with my eyes. He seems to have no other marks on him
apart from the one above his eye. I shake my head and leave the office not letting
my self think too much about it.
“Nice dress” Lip ring man smiles at me over the shoulder of the girl I’m serving.
“Thanks” I smile back and hand him a bottle of the beer he had earlier.
“You do that often?” he says gesturing the bar.
“I have to do it twice a week for a month” I wince “Lost a bet” I screech the last
part and jump back glaring at Lucy who just pinched my bum as she walked past. She
just winks at me.
“What else have you got to do as a result of lost bets then?” lip ring man asks
curiously.
“Oh the stories I could tell you” Andrew says to him clapping him on the shoulder.
I roll my eyes at him. “Please don’t listen to anything this man tells you”
“I’m the best one to talk to, I’m the one that places the bets with her” he smirks at
me “You should have been here the other night, not only did she have to do the bar
dance but she also had to work the whole night wearing just a b…”He starts but I cut
him off.
“That’s enough story time for one night I think” glaring at him I search for a
friendly face, I catch Sophie’s eye and plead for her to come over silently.
“Could I have your phone a second please?” Lip ring man asks me.
I glance at him and pass him my phone. A few seconds later he returns it to me
and walks away. I follow him with my eyes as he leaves the bar. A second later my
phone beeps.

Unknown: I’m Jason by the way; my number is attached to this message.

Coffee, tomorrow?

“What was that about?” Andrew asks still looking at the door “I didn’t scare him
away did I?”
Sophie grabs the phone out of my hand and reads the text. “No you definitely did
not scare him away” she laughs and hands my phone back.
“What’s going on?” Lucy asks joining us.
“Lip ring guy just asked me out” I say still staring at the door but now I’m frowning.
He just walked out, didn’t say a word to me before he left. Not even a smile. “Not
much of a talker”.
“I don’t think talking is what he has in mind for you Brooke” Matt supplies.
“Why? I have barely spoken to the man, he knows nothing about me, and I could
be a complete psycho for all he knows”
They all stare at me. “What?”
“Oh god, you’re serious?” Derek asks looking at everyone for confirmation.
“When a man meets a woman like you, the risk of you being a psycho is well worth
it. Trust me” Cam fills in.
“You’re all crazy” I protest.
 My phone rings so I answer it turning my back on them.
“Hello?” I ask as Lucy and Sophie make kissing noises behind me.
“Have you calmed down yet?” Will asks
“What would you say if I said no?” I ask and they girls start making ‘Oooh’ sounds
into my other ear.
“I would say you’re lying because it sounds like you’re having a good time” he
replies good naturedly.
“Are you coming back?”
“Not tonight, I didn’t think you would want to see me”
“You’d be right” I admit “I’m sure I’ll have some questions for you. Don’t know
when I’ll be ready to see you again though”
“I would be surprised if you didn’t”
“Guess I’ll see you then” I hang up and shush the girls.
“Was that lover boy?” Andrew teases.
“Can you not call him that? I’m not going to have sex with him”
“Why the hell not” Lucy asks completely offended.
“How long have you known me?” I ask her seriously.
“About eighteen months” she answers.
“Then you shouldn’t even have to ask why not” I state simply.
“What’s happening with Phin?” Sophie asks changing the subject.
“He’s sleeping in the office at the moment but his parents are coming to get him” I
refuse to claim any relation to them.
“They are coming here?” she asks surprised.
“Do they know where you live?” Matt asks
“Nope”
“Will they follow you home tonight?” He asks concern covering his face.
I shrug “I’m not going back to the house tonight; you have the place to yourselves”
“Where are you staying” Sophie asks shocked that I would sleep anywhere but my
own house.
“Don’t worry about me I’ll be safe and happy” I nod at the door when Sam and Julie
walk in “I won’t be long with this lot, make sure no one comes in the office OKAY”
“Brooke, you’re not going in there alone” Sophie insists.
“I’ll be fine I promise” I swear. They spot me and head towards the bar, I lift up the
hatch for them and lead them to the office.
“Funny how you haven’t changed a bit over the years” Sam says sweeping his eyes
over me.
“Funny how you can’t keep an eye on your children and they skip towns without
you knowing” I counter
“You have an answer for everything now?”
“I just don’t bother to answer the inane questions”
“Still a whore I see” he says taking in my outfit again slowly this time. I shrug my
shoulders at him and turn to my mother.
“I can’t even say you’re father would be ashamed of you, you’re just like him” she
sneers.
“So I heard, is it true?”
“Is what true?”
“That he was leaving you, us”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about” she says avoiding my eyes.
“You knew and you never thought to tell me?” I ask incredulous.
“What difference would it have made?” she counters.
 “What difference would it have made?” she counters.
“A hell of a lot”
“He was leaving to go live with his whore, I’m not surprised you live here, it’s where
her and her bastard son lives after all”
“So you did know” I say slowly.
“Of course I knew” she spits
“Would have been nice to know I have a half brother” I struggle not to show any
emotion, but it’s getting unbearable.
“It was your fault he left anyway. He didn’t want you. He wanted a boy not a whore
like you. He didn’t love you, he didn’t even like you”
“Is that what you tell yourself really? Don’t you think I noticed how Phin was born
six months after my dad died?”
“That was different”
“Different how?” I shout “You were both as bad as each other! You were both
having an affair; you both had another child on the way by someone else! There is no
wonder he had an affair though, you are malicious, bland, self-centered, repulsive
and agonizing to be around”
“Don’t speak to your mother like that” Sam threatens taking a step towards me.
“Or what? You’ll hit me?” I taunt “Go for it, take your best shot because you’ll only
get one” I warn.
“I should have killed you when I had the chance”
“Yeah, maybe you should have, but you didn’t so get over it” I snap at him loosing
my patience.
“I was put through hell because of you two, but don’t think for one second that I’ll
let you do that to him” I shout pointing at Phin “Because that boy turned up here
wanting to live with me. He doesn’t want to be with you anymore. Your own child
can’t even stand to be with you” I turn to my mum.
“And as for you, you better have another one because so far two out of two hate
you, maybe third times the charm. Will you stick with Sam or find someone else to
knock you up. Maybe that’s why I am like I am … Mother like daughter and all that”
My head snaps back with the slap but I don’t move I stay where I am.
“Then again don’t have another one. You being alive is bad enough without you
spreading yourself around anymore”
This time she punches me, but I still don’t move unable to stop my verbal assault
on this woman who has caused me pain for half my life.
“You think that hitting me will change anything? Do you think that you can get rid of
your pain by inflicting some one me? Is it working? Or it is making you even angrier?”
My questions are met with silence. “That’s what I thought. Well either that you just
are intelligent enough to think of a way to verbalize your feelings” I sigh and shake
my head at her “It must be hard not having anything to say but having all these
feeling boiling up inside you, it’s bad for you, you know, one day you are just going to
explode and probably end up killing someone or yourself. Is it just me that sets it off
or do other people do it too?” I take my time looking at her from head to toe “No I
don’t think it’s just me. I think it’s anytime you see happiness, I just remind you of
something you failed at. That’s what this is all about. The hate isn’t for me, it’s for
yourself, and you failed at your marriage. You couldn’t even get your husband to love
you. Your first child can’t stand you. I know your parents can’t stand you either” her
eyes flash at the mention of her parents. I smile as I hit the nerve.
“Yeah, I might not have been very old but I remember clearly. The phone calls you
used to make to them and they would have you in tears within five minutes. You
didn’t even say anything to them just used to sit there and listen to how you were
worthless and a disgrace to them. Tut tut getting pregnant so young, before you even
finished school. You would cry for hours and tell my dad everything they said to you,
every name they called you. Do you blame me?” I ask smiling.
“Of course I do, I gave birth to a whore!” she screams at me.
“No, you gave birth an innocent baby girl. What ever you think I am is what I’ve
learnt from you, you must be one hell of a teacher because I really did learn from the
best. In fact just a few hours ago I had sex up against that wall right behind you” I
look down at my watch and suck air in through my teeth. “If you like I can go get
some men in here for you so you can have a go? Not sure how many you’ll be able to
go through before we close but knowing you, you’ll surprise me and spread your legs
quickly enough”
She pulls her arm back to hit me again but I’m quicker than her and grab it pulling
her forward with it. “I think it’s time you left now. The first two I gave you but touch
me again and I will break every single one of your fingers” she looks behind me to
Sam “You can set your bulldog on me if you want, but I’m not scared of him. Worst
he can do is kill me and if it means that I no longer have to spend time on the same
earth with the same air you are breathing then that suits me fine” I let her go and she
stumbles back. I walk over to the desk and shake Phin awake, after assuring him he
can call me if he ever needs anything I open the office door widely for them all. “Now
get the hell out of here and I don’t want to see you ever again” I follow them out as
far as the bar and watch them until they have left the building.
I’m immediately surrounded by Sophie, Matt, Tucker, Lucy and Andrew. Sophie,
Matt and Tucker are looking at every inch of my body, checking for marks. I watch as
Tucker and Matt clench their jaws when they notice my red cheek and the little cut on
my lip.
“I swear if one more person calls me a whore I will go terminator on their ass” I
sigh as I lean against the bar.
I watch as the crowd starts clearing when the DJ calls closing. Sophie pulls her arm
around my shoulders and hands me a shot.
“Anywhere else?” she asks staring pointedly at my lip.
“No, I kind of asked for it this time and I couldn’t help but torment her”
“What happened?” She asks
“To cut a long story short. My dad never wanted me, he wanted a boy. He didn’t
like me. Could never love me. She had an affair with Sam and got pregnant with Phin.
My dad was also having an affair and was leaving us the day he died. Oh and I have a
brother that I never knew about until this evening. I’ve met her though and I’ve met
the boy, it’s Wills wife and eldest son” I explain tiredly.
“Wow” is all she says, taking it all in.
“Yeah. Officially the most bizarre night ever”
“I can’t believe it”
“Neither can I. You couldn’t make this stuff up”
 Chapter Twenty One
I answer the door and frown at Tucker stood on my doorstep.
“Morning” he greets me, without his usual charming smile.
“Hey” I step aside to let him in still frowning, wondering how the hell he knows
where I live.
“I gave Matt and Sophie a lift over here when they came up for your birthday” He
answers my unasked question.
“Oh” is all I reply and lead him into the kitchen “Coffee?” I offer, he nods and sits at
the table.
“So what brings you here?” I ask as soon as I’m sat down opposite him.
“I think we need to talk”
I knew this conversation was coming; it’s one of the reasons I don’t stand around
and talk to him at the club. “Okay” I say cautiously.
“I know you’ve been avoiding it but I think we need to, after what happened in the
office”
Yes I remember that clearly, this man sat in front of me is the only one who can
make me forget everything apart from how I much I want him inside me with just a
kiss. I remember how his hands felt gripping my thighs … his lips on my neck …
moving inside me.
“You need to stop thinking whatever you’re thinking otherwise we won’t end up
talking” he scolds.
“Well if you don’t mention sex I won’t think about it” I snap embarrassed.
“I came here to apologise” he admits softy.
“You don’t need to apologize for anything” I insist.
“You’re wrong; I have a lot to apologies for, starting with betraying your trust the
first time, I had no right to tell someone else what you told me. You trusted me and I
Brooke that even knowing how hard it must have been for you to tell me in the first
place. For that I will always be sorry. I will never forgive myself for doing it a second
time either. Those things I said to you in the café, in front of all of our friends and
people who you didn’t even know. You have no idea how much I regret that. I can’t
believe how stupid I was, I had all these feelings for you and I didn’t know what to do
with them. Then after we slept together in the afternoon, I went looking for you a few
hours later and you weren’t in your room. Sophie didn’t know where you were.
I didn’t know what was happening, I thought you regretted it. I thought you were
ashamed of what we did. Then when I saw you the next day and you said that you
were at a hotel, I lost it. I should have let you explain. I should have asked you to
speak to me in private. I should never have lost my temper with you. More
importantly I should never have said what I did about what we did the day before.
What I called you after telling you that I used you. To this day I still don’t know why
you didn’t try to kill me. You didn’t even say anything horrible to me though, you
never said anything bad to me or about me.
I also want to apologize about what happened in the office at the club. It shouldn’t
have happened. I shouldn’t have followed you in there and I shouldn’t have kissed
you. Since I came here you have welcomed me back into your life and treat me the
same as you treat all your other friends when you shouldn’t even have to look at me.
I know that I don’t deserve to have you in my life at all, you’re too kind and you’re so
happy, I don’t want to have the chance to be able to ruin that for you … again” He
shakes his head and looks down into his cup.
I honestly don’t know what to say to that, I want to hell him that he should regret it
all but I can’t because I don’t. I want to tell him none of it matters but it does. I try to
put what I feel into words, searching deep through the emotions that I feel towards
put what I feel into words, searching deep through the emotions that I feel towards
him.
“I appreciate you saying all of that and taking the time to come here and apologize
to me. But there really is nothing to be sorry for. Yes at the time I was hurt, angry
and humiliated. You were one of the reasons I left but I’m not mad at you for that, for
any of it. I don’t look back and regret anything. OKAY maybe the whole telling Beth
stuff but it doesn’t matter. I don’t know if you’ll understand but when I left that room I
never planned on leaving. Sure I was mad as hell and thinking about ways I could
torture you, but then I was sat on my bed and I remembered all the nights you stayed
with me, just because when you were there I didn’t have nightmares. I remembered
all the times we spent laughing and bickering. I loved you. When I was with you I was
happy. I hadn’t been that happy since before my dad died. That was nine years I
didn’t realize I was unhappy for. You showed me that my life didn’t have to be the hell
it was. That gave me the strength I needed to move away.
I don’t regret a single second I spent with you, the good or the bad, the laughing,
the bitching all of it because you saved my life and not just by literally tackling the
man who tried killing me but by just being in my life, you pulled me out of the hell I
was living and into the light.
For that I will always be grateful and I will always owe you for that. If it wasn’t for
you doing that I don’t know where I would be right now.” I wipe away the tear that’s
silently rolling down my cheek. “You have no idea that means to me” I finish glad that
he came over here because I would have avoided this for as long as I could. But now I
know how much I’ve needed to tell him what he did for me.
I will always love him for it and maybe that’s why no one ever comes close to
meaning as much to me has he does. To me he means true happiness.
“You never fail to surprise me, you have had so many terrible things happen to
you, yet you can turn them around and only see the good” he shakes his head “I
completely understand what the guys say when they ask if you’re real”
“I’m far from perfect Tucker people only see what I want them to see, no one sees
when the simple things set me off into a full blown tantrum. No notices when
sometimes just one word can make want to cry or hit someone. No one notices when
I’ve been up all night crying because everything is just too much for me to handle. No
one notices that when something has triggered a rough memory for me I
immediately do something to take my mind off it. No one notices that I do everything
I can to avoid being alone with a man because deep down the fear is still there.
Ridiculous I know but my point is no one notices any of this stuff because no one sees
past the smile”
“The people who care about you do” he says softly but firmly.
“They don’t” I shake my head at him and smile sadly “Ask anyone, Lucy, Andrew,
Mel, Jess any of them ask them why I do the bets, how the whole thing started, what
they won’t tell you is that it started from me and Andrew having a conversation about
scars and then me suddenly changing the subject and betting him that I can balance
a jug of beer on my head” I laugh at the memory “Ask them why my ‘boyfriends’
don’t last longer than a month, they won’t tell you it’s because I avoid being alone
with them and the men give up trying as soon as they catch on.
Why do you think of all the types of businesses in the world that you can I buy, I
bought a club? Because it’s always full of people” I shrug
“No one sees past the bullshit, they only see what they want. Some see me as the
girl who likes to have fun with her friends. Some see me as a woman that knows how
to increase business. Some see me a cock tease. Some see me as a careless young
girl with too much time and money on her hands. Some people see me as a girl who
has worked her way through eighty percent of the men who go to the club and finally
some people see me as just a normal person, they’re the ones I like the best” I laugh
quietly
 “So no I’m not perfect. I’m still as fucked up as I always was the only difference is
that now I’m happy with it.”
I watched confused as he gets up from the table I walk to the kitchen doorway to
watch what he’s doing. He doesn’t say another word to me and doesn’t look back as I
watch him leave my house and walk away.
“Well that went well” I sigh to the empty kitchen and snort; I do not need to start
talking to myself.

I meet up with Jess and Lucy for lunch still a bit confused by Tuckers behavior this
morning. I know everyone has noticed my mood but isn’t saying anything.
“So what are the plans for tonight” Jess finally asks referring to the shirts me and
Lucy had to pick up on our way here.
“Basically we have to go to work wearing a top with a stupid saying on it” Lucy
grumbles back making me chuckle softly, Lucy hates the theme nights at the club.
“Who comes up with these things anyway?” she complains to me.
“Will does” I answer not looking up from my drink.
“Will he be there tonight?” she asks cautiously. I nod at my cup, tonight is the first
night I will be seeing him since that night last week when he told me my dad was
having an affair and I have a brother that is Wills step son.
“Will you be okay?” Jess asks putting a comforting hand on my arm.
“I’ll be fine, I’m sure he will keep his distance and probably stay in the office for
most of the night, it can’t be easy for him either, he was best friends with my dad and
he’s married to a woman who loved him and has to look at that little boy everyday
and see my dad in him” I shrug. I think I have come to terms with it a little better
now.
“Tucker came by to see me this morning” I tell them frowning.
“What did he say?” Jess asks she knows more about our relationship than Lucy
does. I’m not sure why I have held back on some of the things I have told Lucy about
Tucker but I don’t really feel comfortable talking to her about him.
“It was a little strange, he came over to talk about what happened before I left and
then once all was said and done and we’d both apologized for the past he just walked
out” I frown again remembering that he just stood up and left.
“What do you mean?” Lucy says with her own frown.
“We were talking and he just stood up and walked out, didn’t say anything to me,
no goodbye or anything… just left without a word” I shrug still not understanding. “I’m
glad we talked though, I feel a lot better about him being here now” I admit.
“Well as long as you’re happy because it looks like he’s going to be sticking around
for a while” Jess puts in.
I open the bag at my feet and look at my top for the first time since collecting it.
Once I see what is printed on it I quickly shove it back into my bag.
“Oh my god, what does yours say?” I ask Lucy who looks into her bag and pulls out
a neon pink tee the same as mine just hers has ‘Pat me’ printed on the back with an
arrow pointing down.
“I’m going to kill him!” she sighs shaking her head “yours?” she asks and I hold up
my top that has two hand prints on the chest area and underneath in capitol letter its
reads ‘Squeeze me’
“Think we can get him one hat has a target over his chest that reads ‘shoot me´?” I
ask hopefully only half joking.
Both girls just laugh and we say our goodbyes to go get ready for what is obviously
going to be a terrible night.
 When I walk into the club it is already starting to fill up quickly. I spot Lucy and Will
in some sort of discussion, Lucy seems to shouting at him but Will just looks slightly
amused. I head over there to see what the problem is.
“If one more person touches my ass” Lucy is shouting at him.
“Hey, it could be worse Luce!” I say as I join them and point to my chest, I have a
shirt on undone over it and glare at Will.
“We were going to get you one but with what we were thinking about having
printed on it, there would have been too much blood” I tell him but it has no effect on
him. He seems to be enjoying himself.
I look around and can’t quite believe my eyes; he has turned the club into some
sort sex themed carnival. There’s a kissing booth that I’m sure he expects me and
Lucy to take turns in. Two big stands catch my eye there are two big digital weighing
scales on barstools with signs above them reading ‘If this reaches one hundred
Brooke will do a bar dance, coins only’ the other one reads “If this reaches one
hundred Lucy will do a pole dance, coins only”.
“We don’t even have a pole” I turn to will confused and a little shocked. He points
towards the stage and I see a temporary stripper pole has been put up. “You’re
kidding me” I mutter.
“I’m not doing it, I’ve already told him to take the sign down” Lucy says loudly.
“Brooke you’re going to have to take the shirt off” Will instructs me smiling.
I shrug and remove my shirt so I’m just in my tee. I hear someone laugh behind me
and turn my head to see Andrew and Tucker shaking their heads at me.
“What?” Will asks. I turn around for him and show him the back of my top. “You’ve
ruined it!” He complains making Lucy laugh.
“I have to make people work for it” I tell him sweetly referring to the message on
the back of my top that I added earlier, it reads ‘Only if you punch the manager first’
“Sometimes I really dislike you” he grumbles and walks back into the office
defeated. I shrug and get out my pen to write the same on Lucy’s back.
“I love you” she sighs laughing and we both get to work serving the customers.
Andrew and Tucker spend the night teasing us about how quick our scales are
filling up and asking when we will be going into the kissing booth we get through it by
ignoring them.
“I really don’t want to do the pole dance” Lucy says to me worrying her bottom lip
as she watches a group of men add money to her scales.
“I’ll swap with you if you want?” I offer, obviously we are going to need to do
something because people are paying to see us do these things. She nods at me and
I pull her up onto the bar with me I grab a mic and address the crowd.
“Firstly we would like to thank you for the money you have all put into tonight. I’m
not sure what great cause the money will be going to as I’m not talking to the man
who arranged it all at the moment. I also have two announcements to make. Lucy
and I will be switching our dances, she will dance on the bar and I will dance on the
pole” The crowd cheer and I hear someone shout kissing booth I look down and see
Andrew and Tucker still laughing. “The second announcement is that Lucy and I won’t
be going into the kissing booth” The mean all boo and groan. “Instead ladies these
two very handsome men will be” I watch as the two men stop laughing and look p at
me the women in the club all cheer “That’s right, the lead singer of our in house band
Tucker will be in there along with the man you are all used to seeing on the bar with
me, Andrew. Now pucker up ladies because they are very good at what they do” I
wink at the crowd as the women’s cheers turn into screams.
Laughing Lucy and I jump down from the bar.
“You’re going to pay for this” Andrew glares at me.
“Wanna bet?” I smirk at him, knowing I have won this round.
 They both quickly accept their challenge and start pointing out to each other which
girls they want in their line. Shaking my head at them I head back to help Lucy at the
bar.
 Chapter Twenty Two
At the club I can’t stop smiling to myself. My happiness is infectious and everyone
notices.
“Are you going to tell me why you look so pleased with yourself?” Lucy asks
smiling.
“I’m just happy that’s all” I answer grinning.
“Any why are you so happy today?”
“Promise to keep it to yourself?” I ask looking around. She nods and leans in so I
whisper to her or at least talk quieter than shouting over the band.
“I just come back from my date” not able to keep the excitement out of my voice.
“With who?” she asks just as excitedly.
“Morgan, I met him last week, he sold me my new car”
“What’s he like?” she giggles in my ear. Honestly we are like a pair of school girls.
“Gorgeous” I sigh dreamily.
“What are you two whispering about?” Andrew comes up behind us making us both
jump back and swap guilty looks. He raises an eyebrow at us both. “Okay now you
have to tell me”
“Uhh ….” I trail off and he turns to Lucy expectantly.
“Umm … we were talking about lingerie?” she says but it comes out like a question.
He narrows his eyes at us and walks off. We turn back to the bar and get to work
every so often giggling at each other as she asks me a question about Morgan and I
answer her grinning. We get a few questioning looks but they just make us smile
wider.

The next week flies by I see Morgan everyday and work at the club every night.
No one apart from Lucy knows I’m dating someone. It is a little strange dating
while Tuckers in town but I have managed to keep it from him so far. I’m not sure
how he would react to the news but I have to watch him flirt and leave the club with a
different girl every few days so he can’t complain if I do the same.

Once again I find myself thrown over Andrews shoulder as we enter the bar.
Everyone cheers and laughs as he carries me through the bar and deposits me on
the bar. I snatch the mic he hands me and cross my arms. Full on tantrum mode
much to everyone’s amusement.
Everyone in the club starts chanting “What’s the bet?” even my friends have joined
in.
“Brooke’s pulling out of a bet” Andrew calls shaking his head at the crowd.
“I said no bet Andrew” I snap in my mic more forcefully that I have ever said
anything before.
“Then you shouldn’t have accepted it” he shrugs at me laughing.
“I only accepted it because I thought there was no way I could loose” I sulk.
“Well you did so now you have to face the consequences” He sighs as if it troubles
him to make me do these things.
“I’m not doing it. I mean it. No bet” I stubbornly hold my place, not changing my
mind there is no way I will do it. I know Morgan’s in the club but I refuse to look at him
until I have solved this argument.
“Give my one good reason why I should let you out of it” Andrew says to me
making me glower at him.
I lean down on the bar and try to get Lucy’s help.
 “You have to help me out here. He wants me to do a strip tease” I stop so she can
finish laughing. “I wouldn’t do it anyway but normally I would go along with it and play
it up without actually taking any clothes off”
“Why can’t you just do that?” She asks still laughing just no so loud now.
“Because Morgan’s here and I don’t want him to think he’s dating a stripper” I
whisper quickly and relax she gets serious.
“You can’t ask her to do that” Lucy shouts up at Andrew as I stand and take my
place next to him again.
“Why the hell not?” He demands. “She …”
I cut him off leaning up to him and whispering in his ear. “I don’t want the man I’m
dating to think he’s going out with a stripper Andrew. Cut me some slack please” I
beg.
I stand back and wait for his reaction. His eyes swing to Tucker who frowns at us
and then he looks back at me I shake my head at his assumption and discreetly with
my eyes I gesture to the crowd.
“Fine” he sighs into his mic “But you’re not off the hook. I will think of something
else”
I feel my whole body relax with relief and finally search for Morgan in the crowd,
when I find him he is watching me smiling. I grin down at him and roll my eyes
making him chuckle. I’ve told him all about the bets and trouble I get myself into with
them. He finds the whole thing amusing but somehow I don’t think me pretending to
strip in front of a club full of people would have the same effect. We both jump down
from the bar, I go and hug Lucy gratefully and discreetly point Morgan out in the
crowd for her then we go to work while Andrew sits on a bar stool grumpily thinking
about another forfeit.
“You’re not going to start being boring now that you have a boyfriend are you?” he
pouts at me.
“No, I just don’t want to take it too far, just tone it down a touch when he’s in here
please. I’d really appreciate it if you’d let him think I’m slightly normal”
“Fine” he grumbles.
About an hour has passed since I came here and Morgan still hasn’t come over to
see me, the bar has been busy but he hasn’t acknowledged me at all since I was on
the bar. He has been looking my way with a strange expression though I frown to
myself into the drink I’m pouring.
“Have you noticed the way Morgan keeps looking at you?” Lucy asks me when I
turn and lean my back on the bar as soon as we have a quiet five minutes.
“Yeah, it’s strange right?” I ask.
“It’s as if he’s checking to see if you’re watching him” she thoughtfully.
“That’s what I thought, He hasn’t even said hello to me yet” I complain
“Well he’s a bit preoccupied at the moment” I turn at the shock in her voice and
watch as Morgan leans in and kisses a woman wearing a tight black dress.
“Okay please tell me I just imagined that” I say turning back around not able to
watch any longer just in case I see something else.
“What an ass” She mutters “want me to go slap him for you?” she asks seriously
making me laugh.
“No it’s okay” I sake my head at her then head to the end of the bar where the
band are sat Jamie catches my eye as I’m headed towards them and I gesture for
him to move away from the band and meet me halfway.
“Alright Brooke?” he asks as I lean over the bar to talk to him quietly. Once I’ve
explained what I want him to do he looks into the crowd and then frowns at me.
“Please?” I smile at him pleadingly. He walks away and heads into the crowd and I
go back to help Lucy serve the group of students that have just come in. We have
another busy twenty minutes and finally just as the bar are clears Jamie comes over.
“They swapped numbers, and spit … a few times. He’s here to see a friend.
They’re going out for dinner tomorrow, I didn’t catch where to though”
I drop my head on the bar “I have terrible taste in men. It’s official I am a dickhead
magnet”
“Wait I thought you just wanted me to listen to see if he was single because you
thought he was fit?” Jamie asks looking down at me.
“I’ve been dating him. He’s supposed to be staying over mine tonight, you know
our first sleep over” I answer feeling a bit sick.
“Idiot” Jamie mumbles.
“I know, I should have known sooner what he was like” I agree but he just shakes
his head at me and joins the band back at the bottom of the bar.
“He’s planning on dumping me after I’ve has sex with him isn’t he?” I ask Lucy.
“Sounds like it” she agrees with me.
I walk down to the end of the bar and join the boys.
“Hey Brooke, what was the bet you backed out of earlier?” Derek asks me when I
join them.
“Strip tease” I reply then turn to Tucker.
“Can I speak to you a sec please?”
“Sure” he says looking at me questioningly then walking to an empty table with me.
Once we are seated I turn to him “Am I good at sex” I ask watching his eyes for
any signs of a lie.
“Excuse me?” he says choking on his drink, I wait for him to calm down “Why?” he
asks.
“Because see that guy over there” I point to Morgan and the woman he is dancing
with “Well he plans on having sex with me tonight and then leaving me to have sex
with her” I explain as he turns to look at Morgan.
“Idiot” he says straight away.
“I know. I can’t help it. So am I?” I press.
He turns and watches me intently for a second. “You’re serious?” He finally asks
starting to look uncomfortable. I nod at him. “Surely there’s someone else you can
ask?” he pleads.
“Not really no” I say starting to feel uncomfortable as well. “Do you know, what
don’t worry about it, forget I ever asked” I stand up and leave the table heading for
Andrew.
“Does kissing a girl turn you on?” I ask leaning up to speak into his ear. He nods at
me and frowns in confusion.
“Have you ever kissed a man?” I ask but he just pulls an are-you-out-of-your-ever-
loving-mind face at me making me chuckle. “I guess not. Do you think someone can
be turned on from just a kiss weather or not they fancy the person?” I continue my
questions.
“I don’t know, why?” he asks me out loud now.
“I’m thinking about giving up men but I don’t fancy women and kissing turns me on
so I’m thinking maybe it doesn’t matter who I kiss” I explain.
“Will you let me watch?” he says, excitement gleaming in his eyes. I walk away
from him and head back behind the bar. Trying to figure out if it’s time I made a
lifestyle change or not.
“I need a favor” I say to Tucker once I have made my mind up.
“I’m not having sex with you” he replies not looking up from his drink.
“I don’t want you to have sex with me” I insist rolling my eyes.
 “Then what do you want from me” he asks ignoring the band members all looking
at him as if he’s crazy.
“I need you to kiss me” I say turning on my most sweet and innocent smile.
He snorts at my smile “Why?”
“Because I’m giving up men” I huff.
“Then why do you want me to kiss you?” he asks slightly offended.
“I can’t believe you’re going to make me say this” I grumble and then look at him
straight in the eye as I explain, hoping I don’t blush “Because when you kiss me you
turn me on, really turn me on so much that I’m basically ready for sex straight away
after it. My problem is that I don’t fancy women, although watching lesbian porn turns
me on as you know so I suppose I could … So anyway I need you to kiss me so I’m so
turned on that I’m no longer thinking about who I’m with and then I can kiss a woman
and it will be like I’m gay ... except with your help … actually I might need you every
time I want to have sex with my girlfriend … if I can find one … where the hell would I
meet a gay girl?” I trail off distracted.
He just stares at me wide eyed and open mouthed. I shift nervously.
“Holy shit” the rest of the boys say almost in chorus but not quite so it sounds like
hohoholy shishishit.
“Walk away Brooke” Tucker says to me tightly clenching his jaw.
“Fine” I say holding up my hands in a defensive gesture “I’m going”.
“What are you sulking for?” Lucy asks I reach around her to get to the limes.
“I’m not sulking” I reply sulkily making her laugh.
“You clearly are” she says dryly as she watches me line up the tequila shots on the
bar.
“Would you kiss me?” I ask turning my back on the people taking their shots.
“Sure” she shrugs and then kisses me; I am so stunned I don’t even know what’s
going on. I’m aware that a few men are cheering and I suspect they are Jamie, Cam
and Derek. I am aware that Lucy’s hands are on my hips holding me in place and I
am aware that Andrew is standing very close to us shouting “Fuck, I didn’t think you
were serious!” and a few people by the bar are clapping.
She pulls away from me and I can’t help but feel disappointed. I might as well have
kissed a cup I got so little excitement out of it. I throw my arms up and let them fall to
my sides then turn and put at Tucker who just rolls his eyes at me.
“Sorry Luce didn’t get my juices flowing” I say still disappointed.
“That’s okay, it happens” she shrugging as if she helps people discover their
sexuality all the time.
Andrew climbs on to the a and grabs a mic I barely stop my legs from taking me as
far away from the building as possible, I know this isn’t going to be good, for me
anyway. Holding in a sigh of exasperation I get my mic and jump up there with him.
“Tonight is all about discovering your sexuality” he announces making the crowd
go wild. I look around and notice that Morgan is no longer here so I check my phone,
he text me.
Morgan: Sorry babe I had to rush out to a meeting.
Unbelievable able to man sells cars for a living and it’s as if he actually believes
that I didn’t see him with another woman all night.
“Our two lovely ladies behind the bar have already started and have just finished
making out” he tells them all. “Did it do anything for you Brooke?” He asks turning to
me.
I glare down at Tucker before I reply “No”
“Maybe you didn’t do it right?” he asks
“Are you implying I’m a bad kisser?” I ask a little offended but after thinking it
through, maybe that’s why I didn’t get turned on. Maybe that’s why Tucker didn’t
want to kiss me and boyfriends never stay around long enough for me to decide
weather or not I want to have sex with them. I put my face in my hands and groan
“Oh god I am a bad kisser”
“No, that’s not what I’m saying, I’ve kissed you remember, so I would know” he
reassures me but I don’t quite believe him.
“What are you saying then?” I ask still not convinced.
“I’m saying that maybe you just aren’t attracted to Lucy” he says “Sorry Luce” he
apologizes down to her with a wince.
“No that’s not it, I’m just not attracted to anyone with breasts” I admit. “I’ve
already solved my problem anyway, so I don’t need your help anymore” I inform him.
“And what conclusion did you come to?” he asks cocking his head to the side and
regarding me curiously.
“To buy a new vibrator. But enough about my sex life, how’s yours?” I ask taking
the attention on from me.
“Mine’s mighty fine” he says grinning and then winks at a group of women.
“Oh” I say putting disappointment into my voice.
“Why what did you have in mind?” he asks turning back to face me.
“Only that if you were lonely I could …lend you a video” I wink at him
“What video?”
I put my mic down on the bar and walk over to him and whisper up in his ear
“You’re brother lent me a video … of someone … in the bath … singing … and …
shaving his legs” as soon as I have said the last word I take a few steps back laughing
as he shouts “I’ll kill him” he takes a step towards me
“Where is it Brooke?” he says threateningly.
“What’s it worth?” I tease.
“What do you want?”
“Now there a loaded question” I smirk
“Have you watched it?” he asks
“Of course. I like the soundtrack” I try to say but not sure it comes out through my
laughing. I try to stop laughing so much, I really do but it’s not happening. My chest
starts hurting and I’m finding it hard to breathe. I sit down and start hyperventilating.
Lucy starts rubbing my back and once I’m calm enough she passes me a glass of
water. While I’ve been having a laughing fit, Andrew has been over to DJ and handed
him his phone. I look up amazed as all the screens in the club turn to a drunken me
dressed up as a police woman. I shrink slightly into the bar as the drunken me on
video starts talking.
“Come on, lets go find someone I can put under arrest” I beg to the camera.
“You do know you’re not a real police officer, right?” Andrew asks laughing and Mel
and Jess are laughing in the background.
“Are you really going to argue with me when I have this?” I say threateningly and
pull out a water gun on him.
“What are you going to do when you find someone to arrest?” he asks me clearly
amused.
“Uh handcuff them” I say slowly as if he’s stupid.
“Right, do you have any handcuffs on you?” he asks just as slowly.
I rummage around in my outfit and my purse; I even check my bra “Shit I think I
left them on my headboard” I pout.
“And why are they on your headboard?” he asks laughing.
I seem to be thinking this over and then all of a sudden my face drops and I look
horrified, I start stumbling/running away from the camera down the road.
 He runs after me laughing “What’s wrong Brooke? What did you do?”
“I left Lewis handcuffed to my bed! Shit I can get arrested for this!”
The TV goes back to music videos and everyone is laughing, even the DJ. I cringe
as I remember Lewis, my then boyfriend, we had only been going out for a month
and he left me after I un-cuffed him, understandably since we were going out fancy
dress for his birthday.
“And I have plenty more videos like that, if you want to play that game with me
Brooke?” he says walking up to me still laughing.
“I can think of a different kind of game I’d like to play with you” I grumble as I walk
away from him and join the band.
“How’s it going Officer Brooke? Have we been bad boys?” Cam teases as I sit on
the bar stool next in between him and Derek.
“I thought you were my friend” I complain to him.
“We are, its just too funny not to” Derek says ruffling my hair.
“I don’t think I’ve met Lewis have I?” Jamie asks grinning.
“No I was going out with him for a month, that night we were all going out as fancy
dress for his birthday and I hand cuffed him to my bed messing about and kind of
forgot about him, I got home, un-cuffed him and he left. I haven’t seen him since”
“Nice” Cam says chucking.
“I hate that everyone can make fun of my embarrassing moments. I’m taking a
stand!” I announce moving from the table.
After making arrangements with the DJ I climb up onto the bar with my mic ready
and waiting, as soon as the crowd has turned their attention back to me I wave at
them all and smile widely at Andrew.
“Now I apologize in advance but I’m going to sing … a few of you will remember
the first time I lost a bet and had to sing for you all but now I’m going to sing for just
one special person. For those of you who haven’t heard me sing before I just hope
you’re drunk enough to block it out” I nod at the DJ and watch Andrews face fall as
the first few notes of Christina Aguilera’s Fighter come on.
This is the song he was singing in the bath on that video and only he and I know it.
“This one’s for you baby” I wink at him and start singing and dancing. The crowd clap
along and a dance among themselves. Lucy is cheering for me along with the band.
“I laugh through the chorus and have to turn my eyes away from Andrew’s scowl or
I’ll never finish the song. Pull Lucy up on the bar and start singing at her as we dance
together.
The whole club join in with the last chorus and cheer and clap as the song ends. I
take an exaggerated bow and laugh when I see Andrew charging towards me. I jump
down off the bar before he reaches it and run around him to join the bands table
again hoping for safety.
“I didn’t know you could sing Brooke” Cam says as I sit next to him. I shrug and
take a drink of my beer.
“If we ever get fed up of Tucker we’ll come find you” he winks at me.
“At least someone appreciates me” I poke my tongue out at Tucker who just rolls
his eyes at me.
“A word Brooke?” Andrew asks standing behind my chair.
“Umm actually I’m a bit busy right now” I say not looking at him.
“Okay then I guess I’ll just have to have another video put on the screens, how
about the one with the bottle?” He asks too sweetly.
“You wouldn’t!” I gasp spinning around to look at him.
“Oh, I would trust me” He nods at me.
“What happened with the bottle?” Derek asks.
 “Well it involves Brooke, a beer bottle and a condom”
“Fine” I snap getting up and following him through the club as the guys shout after
us asking more about the video.
“Brooke…” he starts when we enter the storeroom.
“Look Andrew, I was just kidding, I don’t actually have the video your brother does.
We were over his watching films one night and that video of you got put in on
accident. I wouldn’t show anyone it. I’m not that cruel” I cut him with my explanation
before he lecture me.
“That’s not what I wanted a word with you about” he shakes his head at me and his
expression is serious, I then notice that he’s hold a CD.
“What’s that?” I ask pointing to it.
“Someone gave it to Lucy behind the bar with a message for your boyfriend to play
it, when she asked who your was they said the guy you’re always making bets with”
“Why didn’t you play it?” I ask confused now.
He silently hands me the CD and I look at the label. Brooke gets busy in the office.
Is written in neat handwriting across the disk. I frown and put it in the player we have
in the storeroom nothing happens so I try the DVD player I wince as I watch Tucker
enter the office behind me. The video is taken from behind the sofa and it looks like
camera phone quality. I shut it off as Tucker places his hands above my head on the
door and turn to Andrew.
“Can you ask Tucker to come down here please?” I ask him softly “And thanks …
for giving it to me first” I watch as he nods and leaves. I have the strangest feeling
that I’m being watched but I pass it off as seeing the video, clearly someone was
watching us that night but I’m not sure what they thought to gain from videoing it and
then hoping to show it to the club.
“Andrew said you needed me?” Tucker asks closing the door behind him.
“Someone left this is at the bar with Lucy to pass on to my boyfriend” I say walking
towards the TV.
“Boyfriend?” he asks confused.
“Andrew, they wanted him to give it to the DJ to play on the club screens” I explain
as I press play and we fill the screen. We both watch as Tucker leans down and kisses
me, the kiss quickly turns from slow and soft to fast and desperate, as soon as we
start removing each others clothes I reach to turn the TV off but Tuckers hand on my
arm stops me.
I look up to see he’s watching the screen intently he pulls me in front of him so my
back is pressed up against him. I feel the definite outline of his erection against my
backside, I turn my head up to look into his face, he doesn’t move his eyes away from
the screen but I can see the heat in them. I turn back around to watch as I’m pushed
up against the door and lifted at the same time.
I gasp as on screen Tucker slides inside me while the real Tucker stood behind me
slips his hand up my dress and into my underwear he starts rubbing my clit with his
fingers as he watches us on the screen. My moans both from me and the TV
surround us and I feel Tucker slide my underwear down along with my dress leaving
me naked from the ankles up then the sound of his zipper going down. He bends me
over the table and slides into me, I rest my forehead on the table but he leans over
my and lifts my chin so I’m watching the screen. As I watch the passion between us
on screen I feel my orgasm start to build. Tucker isn’t taking it slow with me, he is
matching the same rhythm as the one we are watching it is so intimate and well hot
that soon I find myself crying out at the same time I do on the TV, a minute later
Tucker is following me with a grunt and stills inside me.
We both catch our breath as the TV screen goes blank.
“Shit…” Tucker sighs as he pulls out of me making me wince slightly “I think I’m
going to keep that tape” he grins at me doing up his trousers.
I try my best to look angry and offended whilst pulling up my underwear and dress
at the same time but I don’t think it has the desired effect.
“Are you not bothered at all that someone videoed that and then tried to show it to
the whole club?” I demand.
“Well shit Brooke of course I am but … what can I do about it?”
I stare at him speechless. I know there is nothing he can do about it and we don’t
have cameras in the office so I can’t check to see who’s been in there but surely he
should be a bit more affected by this. I take the disk of the player and hand it him.
“You’re welcome to it but what are you going to do with it?” I ask him curiously.
He raises an eyebrow at my question. “I’m sure you can use your imagination”
“Yeah that’s what I thought. You do realize this probably isn’t the only copy and
whoever took the video probably uses it for the same thing. It could end up on the
internet. It could already be on the internet”
“Christ and I didn’t even last that long” he complains making me roll my eyes.
“Sorry to break it to you but you didn’t even last that long just now and there’s a
camera in here so you can have that video too, if you put them both together you
might actually last longer than ten minutes stud” I smirk at him as I walk out of the
storeroom leaving him muttering to himself.
 Chapter Twenty Three

“You did not take that bet again” Lucy laughs noticing my lack of a shirt as she
joins me behind the bar.
“Don’t ask” I grumble pouring another shot, these seem to be a favorite tonight, I
must have poured about eighty so far and I’ve only been here two hours.
“Hey Andrew” I glare at her as she calls Andrew over; he of course is looking smug.
“What did she bet?”
“She didn’t make a bet with me, Tucker bet her that if she asked ten guys for a
condom she would get at least seven. She didn’t believe him and so took the bet. She
collected nine all together” he laughs.
I glare over at Tucker who is on the stage with the band and as he catches sight of
my expression he laughs through a few lyrics so I flip him the bird.
“I’ll get it back” I declare to myself more than anyone else.
I spot a group of girls arguing so I throw my shirt back on before I head into the
crowd to calm them down and split it up if necessary. I’m halfway across the dance
floor when someone grabs my arm and is dragging me into a corner. I look back but
all I can see is the back of whoever is pulling me so I look for a familiar face, I lock
eyes with Cam and watch as he takes in the situation and walks up to Tucker and
discreetly gestures to me, Tuckers eyes are immediately on me then he looks to the
bar alerting Andrew or someone I hope.
Once we have reached the dark corner of the club my captor turns to me, still
gripping my arm.
As soon as I recognize him I try to remove his hand from my arm but he doesn’t
budge.
“We meet again Brooke” he sneers down at me.
“Let me go George” I stare pointedly at my arm but he just tightens his grip.
“Someone is going to come and see where I am any minute now” I try to force my
tone to stay firm but it wavers.
“Then we better make it hard for them to find you because we need to talk” he
says pushing the fire exit behind him open and pulling me outside. I can only hope
either Cam or Tucker saw us leave.
“What do you want?” I ask trying to get this over with.
“Why don’t you ever talk to me anymore Brooke?”
Because you’re a psycho, I say in my mind but keep that to myself. “I do talk to you
George I just haven’t seen you much lately and when I have seen you I’ve been
rushed off my feet”
“No you’re more interested in your boyfriend” he shouts the last word making me
jump.
“I don … I don’t have a boyfriend” I say hating that I’m stuttering.
“Have you had sex with him too?” he demands
“Who are you talking about?” I ask nervously.
“That boy you are always laughing with on the bar”
“Umm .. no we’re just friends … please let my arm go George you’re hurting me” I
plead.
“No, you hurt me every time I see you and you ignore me. Why Brooke?”
“Why what?” I have no idea how I am still talking to him as if this is a normal
situation, My mind is more focused on why someone hasn’t come out here yet.
“I’ve seen them you know. It’s OKAY. You can talk to me. I have some too” he says
the sympathy in his voice makes me turn all my attention back to him.
“You’ve seen what?” I ask confused, all the worry gone now.
 “You’re scars, I saw them when you were in the store room with that singer” I am
in shock, or at least I think I am, that’s why I don’t move when he rips my shirt open
with one hand sending buttons flying everywhere and that’s the reason I don’t move
when he lets my arm go to rip open my bikini top to look at my scars. “Mine” he
reads aloud running his finger over my scars.
His gently touch brings me out of my stupor and I push his hand away “I’m
nobody’s!” I yell and run past him to the entrance of the club holding my shirt closed
as best I can.
“She’s here” someone shouts I ignore it and push my way through to the bar.
“Don’t let anyone in but Tucker” I call to Lucy and Zack as I walk into the office.
I crawl onto the floor behind the desk and try to control my breathing to calm down
so I won’t cry. A few minutes later the door opens.
“Brooke?” Tucker calls
“Are you alone?” I ask my voice shaking.
“No Andrew and Cam are here is it okay if they come in too, they want to make
sure you’re okay” he asks softly.
“Umm ... I love them for that but I have no top on at all” I call back quietly. I hear
him say something too low for me to hear and then the door closes.
“Are you okay?” Tucker asks cautiously still from the other side of the room. He
knows from experience that after something bad happens to me I can freak out at
any moment if someone comes to close. That has never been the case for him
though.
“I think so?” I say but it comes out as a question
“Brooke, I’m going to have to make sure he didn’t hurt you” his voice is pleading
and I struggle to hold back the tears over his concern.
“It’s fine, come on over, he didn’t hurt me” As I say it I look down at my arm and
wince at the redness of it, that’s going to bruise but I can deal with that. He might not
though.
Anger flashes through his eyes as he takes in my ripped clothing and I watch the
muscles ticking in his jaw letting me know he’s clenching his teeth. He’s definitely
pissed. “What did he do” he asks tightly.
“Nothing, well he was watching us in the storeroom and saw my scars, he touched
them” I explain avoiding his eyes because I have never shown him the scars and
every time I thought he might come close to touching them I have moved his hand. I
have no idea how I have kept them from him for so long but I have.
“What scars?” he asks confused but I know that won’t last long, anger will be back.
“If I said it doesn’t Matter, would you listen to me and forget I ever mentioned
them?” I ask hopefully making my voice playful. He doesn’t fall for it just stares at me
expectantly. “It’s not a big deal OKAY” I say as I move my top and ruined bikini top
out of the way so the side of my right breast is visible. The scars are small so he has
to move close to be able to see them, and read them.
“How don’t I know about these? Why don’t I remember them?” he asks not taking
his eyes from them.
“Because since you’ve been back I’ve distracted you every time you’ve come close
to finding them and well, I didn’t have them when I saw you before I left”
“I don’t understand” he admits looking at me now.
“When I left that day, after I packed my bags I went to my mums house to say
goodbye to Phin … Sam was there and it was the first time I’d seen him since the
graveyard and he thought you were my boyfriend … he held me down with one of his
friends and ... branded me. They didn’t do anything. This is all” I say pointing to the
small circular burns that spell out Mine.
 “This is my fault?” he asks horrified.
“No!” I grab his hand and squeeze it “It’s not your fault. If it wasn’t for you he
would have killed me that night and if it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t have gone there
before that and attacked him and he would have raped me. That’s what he told me
he was going to do. Remember that night in JD’s when he came and you pulled me
away from him to dance, well that night he drugged me, that’s how I got drunk so
fast, he was going to rape me. You saved me more than once from him. This is not
your fault” I tell him firmly.
“I’m so sorry” he murmurs as he leans down and kisses every one of the burns
then pulls me into his chest in a bear hug.
“Don’t ... I can’t …” I struggle to get out of his hold because I know it could be what
breaks my control.
“I know, but I need to … I need to know you’re okay” His voice shakes so I pull back
and as I look into his eyes that are now glistening my heart breaks.
“Hey” I say gently as his hold loosens and I move my hands up to cup his cheeks
then place my lips on his and kiss him tenderly “I’m okay, because of you” I kiss him
again.
“We should get back out there before they come in here looking for you” he
declares unhappily.
“Ummm” I look down at my top.
“Here, let me” he ties a haphazard knot in my bikini top and removed his shirt, he’s
wearing a tight black tee under it and it distracts me for a moment but I’m brought
back when he shrugs his shirt over my shoulders I stand and do a few buttons up then
tie the bottom into a knot over my stomach.
“I’m ready” I nod at him and we make our way to the door. “Can you not tell
anyone about the …” I trail off as we reach the door.
“Of course. I would never” he promises with a chaste kiss and tucks me under his
shoulder.
He doesn’t leave my side for the rest of the night, he answers questions for me
when anyone asks what happened by playing it off as someone who had drank too
much and got a bit grabby. He pours drinks with me when I get multiple orders and
laughs with me as I teach him how to make cocktails. He helps me clean up when the
club has closed and everyone has gone home. He locks up for me and follows me
home in his car. We don’t talk as we make our way straight up to the bedroom and
climb into bed together.
“Trust me?” He asks as he climbs over me, I nod my acceptance and he undresses
us both slowly, I watch amazed, as he trails soft slow kisses over my body as he
removes my clothing once piece at a time. Every time we have been together it has
always been frantic, filled with passion and a ferocious need to be connected on a
more physical basis. He takes him time with me kissing and licking his way up from
legs to my face, he kisses my eyelids last before moving onto my mouth. The kiss is
powerful and I immediately know this is his way of apologizing for what I won’t let him
apologize for aloud. It’s his way of sorry for what happened to me as a result of his
actions, sorry for making me go back there, sorry for hurting me enough to go back
there and sorry for not being there to stop him from hurting me.
For the first time ever I let him spend the time he needs on my body, I relax into
and get sucked into the pleasure as he caresses my breast, teases my nipples, kisses
and licks every scar, as he sucks and licks my swollen clit and then slowly but
passionately makes love to me. Deep down I know that no matter how rough and wild
we normally are with each other when we are together it is never meaningless or
cheap it is always more.
He tucks my under his arm so my head is on his chest and I’m reminded of the first
time we spent the night together a few years ago after we admitted we had feeling
for each other. I snuggle closer as he runs his fingers through my hair softly.
“I will never let anyone hurt you ever again, and I want you to know that you can
talk to me, no matter what. Even the bad stuff okay?” he asks nudging me gently with
his shoulder.
“Okay” I whisper and squeeze him tightly in answer.
“I love you Brooke, I think I have since the moment you woke up and found me in
your room looking for coffee” he chuckles at the memory “you looked so cute
rumpled from sleep and confused yet amused at seeing me first thing in the
morning.”
“I never stooped loving you. I knew when you told me how you’d worked out my
disguise; it got me thinking and I just knew. That’s why there hasn’t been anyone else;
I couldn’t if it wasn’t you”
“I’m still the only person you’ve been with?” he asks surprised.
“Well there was one person when I first moved here, I thought it would help me
forget you, when it didn’t I never tried again” I tell him honestly.
 Chapter Twenty Four

“I know this is awkward and Tucker did promise me but …” Lucy trails off but the
mention of Tucker promising her something immediately grabs my attention, she’s
struggling to say something to me and I know it’s not something I want to hear but I
have to know.
“Go on” I smile encouragingly at her.
“Well I know he promised me that you wee fine with it and just didn’t wan to talk
about it but I have to tell you that if I knew anything was ever going to happen
between you two I would never have slept with him” she finishes looking both
horrified and embarrassed.
“You slept with him?” I ask not sure if I should believe her or not.
“He didn’t tell you?” It’s clear she doesn’t know if she should believe me now. I
shake my head at her. “He took me home the night after your birthday”
“No way, I went back to his on her birthday” Mel puts in.
“Wait … You’ve both had sex with him?” I ask not sure I’m hearing this right. I had
sex with him the day after my birthday, in the office for god’s sake.
They both nod at me.
I feel sick, like someone has just kicked me in the stomach after I’ve eaten a
massive meal sick.
“OKAY, I can deal with this, just do me a favor and don’t tell Tucker that I know”.
 I stumble into the club dragging my new friend along with me, the band are playing
and everyone is having a good time, I think. I probably should have stopped drinking
hours ago, but well we all make mistakes.
“This is your place?” he asks looking around.
I nod up at him grinning and pull him through to the bar.
“Lucaaaaayyy” I call to get my best friends attention. She does a double take and
walks over to me frowning.
“This is my new best friend Adam” I announce proudly.
“Are you drunk?” she asks watching me not looking happy. I’m not going to let her
spoil my mood when she’s a third of the reason I’m drunk in the first place. “Yupp,
and don’t pull faces at me. Everyone else gets drunk and no one pulls faces at them”
I pout at her. “Me and Adam would like some drinks please. I’m going to show him my
bar dance” I smile up at Adam and look around while we wait for our drinks. I spot
Andrew making his way to us.
“Where have you been? We have all been trying to ring you” he says pulling me
into a hug but I trip so he ends up stopping me from hitting the floor with my face.
“I went out. I have other friends you know. Look here’s one, his name is Adam and
he’s my best friend” I laugh as he stands me up right again.
“How much has she had?” he asks Adam
“Not enough” I shout as an answer “We’re waiting for my bar dance time and then
we’re going on a train” I tell him proudly.
“Brooke you’re not doing a bar dance tonight, you can just about walk on the floor
let alone dance on a bar that’s only a metre wide” he says sternly sounding like a
father.
I throw my arms around him “I didn’t have a daddy for lots of years, will you be my
new one?” I step back and look him over, yes definitely daddy material “Yesss you’re
my new daddy from now on. You’re not allowed to ground me though, although
maybe you should. I’ve never been grounded before it could be fun” I giggle and grab
my beer from the bar and hand Adam his. Lucy joins us on the other side of the bar
and wraps one of my arms around her shoulders and hold me across my middle.
“Oooh Lucy can be my new mom cos my real one’s a bitch and doesn’t like me ….
No cos then you two would have to be married … let me think about this … Lucy is
my big sister, I’ve always wanted one of them and Andrew can be my big brother,
Tucker can be my dad and Mel can be my mom” I nod as I decide my new family.
“And you” I turn to Adam “Can be the reason I get grounded” I giggle at him. “Come
on, there’s someone I want you to meet”
I lead Adam across the bar by the hand and we stop a few times so he can twirl me
under his arm a few people make a tunnel out of their arms for us to duck under,
stood at the end of it is Jess who is grinning and holding her arms out for me.
“Hey Jessie!” I greet laughing at her giggling.
“I love fun drunk Brooke?” she squeals laughing, I love Jess she can tell my mood
just from looking at me.
“Me too! Want to be fun drunk with us? This is Adam” I introduce.
“Hey, I’m Jess” she smiles at him and pulls him into a hug too “What are we
doing?” She asks me excited.
“We are drinking beer, so we don’t get pass out drunk, drunk but you have to help
me because I told Adam he could see my bar dance but Andrew says I’m not allowed
to do it. Oh and Adams going to help me get grounded, you can help too”
“Okay, to the bar!” she sings and grabs both of us by the hand and leads s back to
the bar. “Are you going to serve us Brooke?” she asks laughing at my attempt to get
over the bar, Adam finally takes pity on me and lifts me over it.
“Of course, what would madam like?” I ask putting on a posh English accent.
 “Of course, what would madam like?” I ask putting on a posh English accent.
“SHOTS!” Adam and Jess shouts at the same time.
I nod at them and gather some shot glasses whatever bottle I can find.
Lucy and Will walk out of the office and make their way towards me.
“Oppps, I think you’re in trouble” Mel laughs at me watching Will come closer.
“Nope, watch and learn baby girl” I wink at her and then turn to Will as she and
Adam take their shots.
“Brooke, everything OKAY?” Will asks cautiously.
“Everything is finally good. I’m happy for once Will. I might be drunk but look
around you so is everyone else in here. I was thinking you know that I’d like to meet
Tom again sometime now that I know he’s like my brother. I’d like to talk to him
about our dad, if that’s OKAY with you?” I ask smiling my sweet girl smile that I know
he can’t say no to.
“That would be great Brooke, he talks to me about him but you knew him best. I’m
glad you’re happy Brooke” he hugs me quickly and walks back into the office leaving
Lucy to scowl after him.
“And that is how it’s done” I grin at Jess and Adam who both ‘whoop’ and punch the
air laughing. “You know you might as well join us” I grin at Lucy.
“Body shots!” Jess tells Andrew as he also joins us at the bar.
I don’t wait for anyone to confirm I clear an area on the bar and instruct her to lay
on it, I se the shot up clumsily on her and Lucy puts the shot in between her breasts.
A few of the customers crowd around to watch and I join in shouting “Do it” with
them and point to Andrew.
Cheers go up around us as he slams the shot down and then I clear the area for
him and set him up for Jess. Lucy sets it up for me and Adam takes the shot. Andrew
helps me down and Lucy sets Adam up for the shot, I straddle the bar in front of him.
“Umm what are you doing?” Andrew asks watching me smiling.
“A body shot” I answer slowly so he can understand.
“Oh lord” Lucy sighs as Andrew picks up his mic. It’s then I realize the bands set
has finished.
“OKAY ladies and gentlemen are you ready to witness for a first time ever in the
history of this club … Brooke who has always refused in the past is going to do a body
shot off someone at last!” he announces to the club as more people start to gather
around Lucy passes me a mic resigned and just shakes her head grinning at me.
“What can I say? He’s a very convincing man my Adam” I say making a few people
chuckle. “You’re a very lucky man my friend” I wink down at Adam.
“You know you don’t have to be on the bar with him for this right Brooke?” Andrew
laughs at my position.
“Ahh but my way is so much more fun” I smile into my mix and wink at Andrew
“watch and learn honey”.
Keeping the mic in my one hand I get onto my hands an knees, placing them
outside Adams legs, I crawl up to his stomach and lick the salt away moving up the
bar as I go, I take the shot glass off his chest and throw it back, I suck the lime, not
taking it from him mouth. When I’m done I sit back and straddle him. The crowd
cheers.
“So much more fun my way” I grin over at Andrew.
“Uh, Brooke” Lucy nudges my arm with her shoulder from behind the bar.
“What?” I look down at her then move my eyes to where she is looking and lock
gazes with a not impressed looking Tucker.
I lean forward getting back on my knees and put my hands on either side of Adams
face “I think you just got me grounded” I whisper to him before I push myself up onto
my hands so I’m hovering over him and then stand.
 Jess helps Adam off he bar and everyone watches me to see what I’m going to do
next. I can see Jess saying something to Tucker and she looks as if she’s shouting but
I can’t hear over the music.
Andrew climbs up on the bar after me and we wait while the DJ lowers the music.
“Whatcha gonna do Brooke?” he asks into his mic.
I wrap my both hands around my mic and make my voice as pleading as possible
“Brooke wants to dance” I pout at him
“Brooke’s drunk” he shakes his head.
“But … she’s fun drunk Brooke tonight” I announce making the crowd cheer and
Jess shop talking to laugh at her words being shouted throughout the club.
“I don’t think Brooke would be able to do it without falling off the bar” he says sadly
“Brooke can do a lap dance, there only one place she can fall then … or one thing
she can all on and that could be interesting” I laugh at the scene that plays out in my
head.
“Fun drunk Brooke is also loving” Andrew notes laughing.
“She is” I sigh into the mic
“Brooke is also talking about herself in the third person”
“True, we sure are saying Brooke a lot. Let’s stop”
“I don’t think you can” he laughs at me.
“Are you going to spoil my night?” I ask disappointed in him. “You’re normally fun
with me” I complain
“Well it’s nearly the end of the night”
“Not for me” I smile
“And what are your plans?”
“Well after here, we are going on a train”
“Who’s we?”
“Me and Adam … Where are you Adam ... Oh there you are” I wave at him. “Well
you see we came here so he could see me do my bar dance and meet my friends
have you seen them by the way because you lot aren’t being very welcoming. After
here we are going on a train to a house party at the uni I went to so I can meet some
of his friends that are there. I don’t know what happening after that, we haven’t
figured out if we are going to crash down there or go back to mine yet”
“That’s not going to happen Brooke” Andrew shakes his head at me.
“Uh ... yes it is. It’s been decided, plans have been made, you don’t get a say in it
anyway you can’t stop me you’re supposed to me my big brother, I thought big
brothers were cool. What happened to you? You sound more like a grumpy dad and
that’s not your job”
“Think of me as an overprotective big brother then” he sighs.
“How about we make a bet?” I ask and the crowd cheers.
“What kind of bet?” he asks interested.
I lower my mic and walk over to whisper the bet in his ear.
“And if what happens either way?” he asks smirking at me.
“If I do it you let me carry on with my night of having fun and leave me alone, if I
can’t do it you can put a stop to my fun and I’ll go home. Alone”
“You’re on. You wouldn’t be able to do that sober, let alone as drunk as you are
right now”
The crowd cheers and I turn to them gesturing them to be quiet. “Anyone got a
condom? I ask about fifty hands go up but I take the one closest to me, I pick my beer
up from the bar and down the rest of it.
“OKAY you ready?” I shout into my mic.
I open the condom, put it in my mouth and get down on my knees, placing the
bottle on the bar in front of me I put my hands behind my back and silence fills the
club as I slide the condom all the way onto the bottle using only my mouth.
“Want to check it?” I grin up at Andrew he just shakes his head at me and jumps
down from the bar defeated.
I lean back and sit on the bar as Adam comes over to me. “We don’t have to stay,
shall we just go now? I think we’re ruining some of your friends nights” he asks me
keeping an eye on Andrew and Tucker.
“Hey Jess, wanna come with us? We’re just going to leave now”
“You can’t leave yet Brooke, I want to speak to you first” Lucy says to me pulling
me down from the bar.
“Give me two minutes” I call to Adam from behind the bar as I’m dragged into the
office.
“This isn’t about what Mel and I told you earlier is it?” she asks looking worried.
“No, it’s not about what happened, don’t worry” I assure her.
“Then what’s going on with you and Adam because I thought you and Tucker were
sort of a thing?”
“Me and Adam are just having some fun. As for Tucker and I, well when you find
out what’s going on with us let me know because I haven’t got a clue anymore”
“Just don’t do anything you’ll regret okay?”
“I won’t regret a thing, don’t worry. I’ve spent so many years doing the right thing
that one mistake is not going to end the world” I tell her as I leave the office and
head back into the bar picking up two beers on my way through.
“Hey, where’d Adam go?” I ask Jess when I don’t spot him where he was before I
went into the office.
“Umm … Tucker and Andrew went outside with him” she says nervously.
I knew we shouldn’t have come here, I don’t know why I thought it would be okay. I
never do anything fun and I thought all my friends would be happy that I’m finally
letting my hair down, not all of them are apparently. I know Adam won’t be coming
back in and I’m going to have a word with Andrew about getting rid of people I bring
here. I could go follow him but I know I won’t get far before one of them drag me
back here so I make the most of my time before they get back.
“So what are we going to do for fun now?” Jess asks accepting the bottle I hand
her.
“I’m not sure … dance I suppose” I shrug at her and head off to the dance floor
with her following behind me. The DJ plays my bar dance song as soon as he sees us
enter the dance floor and me and Jess are grinding our way through it when I
suddenly find myself airborne.
“What the hell Tucker! Put me down” I scream kicking and punching him as he
moves us through the bar.
“What to tell me who the hell Adam is?” he demands as soon as he sets me on my
feet when we are inside the office.
“My friend” I snap “Or was until you got rid of him, which by the way you had no
right to do”
“Was you going to sleep with him?” his voice is quiet turning my anger up another
notch.
“Do you have a problem with that?” I ask staring him straight in the eye.
“How would you feel if I slept with someone else?” he asks not looking away from
my eyes.
“Probably the same way I feel about you having sex with one of my best friends the
day before you have sex with me right here in this office and then you having sex
with another one of my best friend’s a few hours later” I shout and walk out of the
office.
I make my way through the bar with my head down, not talking to anyone and I
don’t look up when Andrew puts his arm around me and walks me out to his car and
then drives me home.
We don’t speak at all until we are in my bedroom and both sat on my bed.
“Why do people do things to hurt me?” I ask as I take my shoes off.
“What do you mean?” he asks me softly helping with my shoes.
“Every time I let someone in they do something to hurt me. Why?”
“Who hurt you Brooke?”
“A few people, I have no right to be upset but I can’t help it. It takes a lot for me to
trust someone and let them in. I wonder why I bother sometimes”
“I’m sure no one meant to hurt you”
“I know but it still hurts all the same” I sigh and rest my head on his shoulder.
“I’m sorry for getting rid of Adam” he says playing with my hair.
“That’s okay, I don’t think I would have been able to go through with it anyway” I
tell him through a yawn.
“You sure did drink a lot, what was you thinking?”
“I wasn’t, that was the point, to not have to think anymore”
“Want me to stay the night?” he asks lowering us both so we are led down on the
bed over the covers me curled into him.
“I have nightmares, if you don’t mind that then I’d like you to stay please”
“No problem” he pulls the cover up in front of me so I’m covered “Goodnight
Brooke” he kisses my forehead.
“N’night” I yawn and let the sleep take me.
 Chapter Twenty Five

“I’m worried about you Brooke”

I turn my attention back to Andrew, I hadn’t realized I’d drifted off somewhere
there. He looks concerned. We’ve had a lovely day together today which is what I
needed after last night. He spent the whole night with me, every time I woke up from
a nightmare he would start talking to me about one of our nights at the club,
replacing the bad memories with happier ones. We went out for breakfast and then
walked around town, through the park and now we are having some food before my
shift at the club.
“Sorry, what did you say? I zoned out there for a minute” I admit added sugar to
my cappuccino.
“This is what I mean … I’m worried about you Brooke. It’s none of my business and
you can tell me to butt out but … for the last few months you have been all over the
place. I’ve seen you go from depressed to wanting to kill someone in less than two
minutes. I’ve seen you cry then laugh, you have been through so many emotions I’m
surprised you’re not worn out. You can’t keep doing it. You’ll end up having a
breakdown”
“Trust me I know” I run my hands down my face and rub my eyes. I know what
he’s talking about and I know it’s only happened since Tucker moved back I also know
that he knows that too but is kind enough to not say it. We are so up and down it’s
hard to keep up, but we have always been like that. He makes me happy but he
brings back a lot of bad emotions and memories. When we are apart and I don’t
know where he is I’m fine, but when we’re apart and I know he is not that far away
my body craves him so much that I loose sleep and only he can stop it. I knew this is
how it would be when I first saw him again at the club and that’s why I ignored him as
best I could and treated him like any of the other men that I’m friends with, a bit of
harmless flirting, some banter, I even took sleeping pills that worked. The problem is I
no longer know if being with him is worth all this effort. I seem to be the only one on
this rollercoaster, he jumped off a while back and I’m not sure if I want him to get
back on it with me. “I think I know what I need to do, you’re right. I can’t keep going
like this” I stand up from the table and collect my bags “meet me at the club; I’ll be a
few hours late tonight. Please can you make sure everyone’s there.” I tell him as I
search through my purse for my phone.
“It’s going to be a good night?” he asks watching me curiously.
“It’s going to be one I remember for a while, let’s make it an excellent one” I smile
grabbing my phone and then head home.
 I walk into the club through the back entrance and go straight into the office to see
Will. As soon as he sees me his expression goes from happy to surprise to concern as
his takes in my casual outfit of jeans, converse and a plain black tee.
“Everything okay Brooke?” he asks concerned.
“Everything’s fine, I just wanted a word before I go out there” I explain and then
tell him my plans.
He takes the news rather well, he doesn’t like what I’m doing but isn’t that
surprised which makes me think that maybe I have been more unstable than I
thought.
“Give me a knock before you do it okay, I’m assuming you’re going to wait until the
end of the night?” he asks hopefully.
“No I’m only staying for an hour or so but yeah I’ll knock the door for you” I say
over my shoulder as I leave the office.
Lucy’s behind the bar training the new girl Will hired to help out in the week.
“Hey Luce” I greet and pull her into a hug.
“Brooke, this is Chloe, Chloe this is the owner, Brooke”
“Nice to meet you, you’ll fit in well. It will be fine” I assure her with a smile because
she looks nervous. She’s very pretty with blonde hair and bright blue eyes, slim, taller
than me a about five foot eight and looks as if she will be a lot of fun when she gets
over her first day nerves. “Lucy will look after you, you’re in great hands”
“Everything okay?” Lucy asks noticing my clothes.
“I’m not staying long tonight. I have some stuff I have to take care of but I wanted
to pop in to see everyone” I reassure her with a smile when she starts looking
concerned. I notice Andrew has done as I asked and called in Jess, Mel, Dan, Zack,
Tucker and the rest of the band. I head to the end of the bar where they are all sat.
I get them all their drinks, not needing to ask what they want and add a shot each
for everyone. Andrew joins me on my side of the bar and helps with the drinks.
“All sorted?” he asks me quietly, I rang him before I came in to tell him what was
happening but asking him to keep it to himself. I nod and grin up at him making him
smile and hug me kindly. “You’re going to be fine” he kisses my cheek.
“Here you guys, you know, one or two of you could change you’re choice of drink
once in a while, mix it up a bit. You’re all very predictable” I tease the group as I hand
out their drinks.
“We don’t need to add any excitement to your night, you do that all by yourself”
Derek teases back making me chuckle.
“Speaking of excitement, are you two going to be putting on a show tonight?” Cam
asks excitedly. He always gets excited when Andrew and I do bets and challenges; he
enjoys my loosing and embarrassments way too much.
I look to Andrew who is grinning.
“Definitely” I answer with a wink and laugh when he rubs his hands together in
anticipation.
“Everything okay Brooke?” Mel asks me turning from her conversation with Tucker
smiling.
“Never better” I assure her, noticing they are linking arms.
“You’re not staying long” Tucker notes, looking at me for the first time since I
walked over, making my decision easier.
“Nope, only for an hour or two” I answer still smiling to let him know all is okay but
he frowns at me when Will walks out of the office and hands me a coffee. I never
drink anything other than alcohol at the club. I don’t always get drunk, five out of six
nights a week I only have one or two beers but I never drink anything else and he
knows that.
The conversation quickly turns to a group discussion on club events that are
 The conversation quickly turns to a group discussion on club events that are
coming up, I make comments when necessary but generally take a backseat from
the conversation not making any commitments but not declining any either. I watch
as Lucy and Chloe struggle with the amount of customers so I give them a hand until
the line clears a bit and introduce Chloe to the group. I notice Tucker looking her
over, I don’t know if it’s because I’m watching for it but I’m not all that surprised by it
I think it’s something he always does I just haven’t paid that much attention to it
before now.
After about two hours since I came here the music lowers and I look up to Andrew
standing on the bar, microphone in hand.
“Guess where I stayed last night” he asks the club.
I laugh and climb up on tot the bar with him taking the mic Lucy holds up for me.
“Let me guess, with the girl of your dreams and it was the best night ever?” I tease
making the crowd cheer.
“I would ask how you know that, but you were there” the cheers get even louder.
“Did you have a good night?” I ask laughing.
“Of course, didn’t get much sleep though” he winks at the crowd.
“I’m worth it though” I smirk back at him.
“Did you enjoy it?” he asks and the crowd goes quiet waiting for me to answer.
I pretend to think about it for a minute “Well you did snore but it was bearable” I
wink to the crowd and turn to Lucy. “Can you knock the office door for me please?” I
ask away from my mic, she frowns but does it.
“We shouldn’t have waited so long to do it” he teases.
“If I knew you liked to cuddle I would have asked you over last winter” I tease back
laughing at how our innocent night together is proving to be such entertainment.
As soon as Will walks out of the office into the bar I nod at Andrew to let him know
it’s time.
“Okay ladies and gentlemen, I know you’re all waiting for me to challenge Brooke
to do something but that’s not going to be happening tonight” a loud groan goes up
around the club and Andrew shushes them. “Tonight however we say goodbye” he
turns around ignoring the confused mumblings and faces of the club and gestures
towards something to Lucy. I can’t help but grin and chuckle as she hands him a
massive bunch of pink and red roses.
“Tonight we say goodbye and good luck to Brooke because she is leaving us” he
announces, I hear a glass smash and turn to see Lucy has dropped a bottle of vodka
after hearing of my departure she looks up at me confused and with tears in her eyes
I smile at her sadly.
“We will be sad to see you go and miss all the entertainment you provide. We’ll
miss hearing you laugh, argue and that sexy little growl you do. We’ll miss seeing
smile, pout and that stubborn thing you do when you’re so sure you’ll win a bet you
have no chance of winning” he smirks at me. ”But most of all we will just miss you
being here” He hands me the flowers and kisses me on the side of my mouth.
“Thank you Andrew I’ll miss you too” I hug him and then turn to the crowd. “I’ll
miss all of you as well and I’ll miss being here six nights a week” I say into my mic.
“How long you’ll be gone, are you coming back?”
“I don’t know yet” I answer without answering; this is something I haven’t figured
out yet.
“I won’t be taking my phone with me so I will only be contactable by email. I want
you all to take care of my friends and be nice to them, they mean a lot to me” I tell
the crowd. “I know you’ll have just as much fun here with me gone. I’ll try not to get
into any trouble while I’m gone, and I hope you’ll all do the same” I tease them. “I
really will miss every single one of you” I hold back the tears that are threatening to
spill over. “Now if you’ll all excuse me, I have a few people I need to say goodbye to
before I leave” I turn to get down of the bar but Andrew stops me.
“If you would all join me I’d like to make a toast” he hands me a shot but I shake
my head at him reaching down for my coffee.
“If you could all raise you’re glasses … This is for you Brooke, good luck and I hope
you’re not gone too long. To Brooke!” He shouts and the crowd all echo ‘To Brooke’ I
smile and raise my coffee at them all.
Lucy pulls me in a hug crying softly.
“I don’t want you to leave” she sniffs into my ear.
“It’ll be fine, I promise. I don’t want to either but I have to” I squeeze her back.
“You promise to come back”
“I’ll try” is all I reply without promising “Take care of everyone for me okay?” I ask
to distract her she nods at me and lets me go.
I head to the customer side of the bar to make my goodbyes to everyone else.
Everyone hugs and kisses me goodbye all asking me to promise that I don’t stay
away too long, a few ask me why I’m leaving but I don’t answer directly. Tucker
doesn’t say goodbye to me in front of the group he leads me to the office. Will looks
up at our entrance and stands to hug and wish me luck and walks out with a ‘have
fun’ and a kiss on the cheek leaving me alone with Tucker. This is the hardest
goodbye but at the same time the easiest.
“Is this about what I did? Because I’m sorry for that” he asks looking at me but
avoiding my eyes.
“It’s not about that, although that helped” I admit.
“Don’t leave because of what I did. We wasn’t together then Brooke” he pleads
making me frown.
“It’s not about what happened Tucker, I’m not upset about that, I’m more upset
about the lie” he starts to talk but I cut him off “You may not have lied to me directly
but you asked two of my best friends not to talk to me about something you told
them you had already talked to me about. You lied to them to keep something from
me. That’s what I had a problem with. If I had known about Mel I wouldn’t have let
what happened in here the night after my birthday happen. If I had known about you
and Lucy straight after what me and you did then nothing further would have ever
happened between us”
“Brooke I…” he starts
“I know sex might not mean a lot to you, but it does to me. What we did, every
time we did it, it meant a lot to me. That you could do that with me and then a few
hours later do it with my best friend, that tells me something Tucker”
“Does it tell you that what happened with me and Lucy was something I did to try
and block out the feelings being with you brought back?” he asks pleadingly.
I shake my head at him sadly “No, it tells me you got three out of three”
“And you didn’t sleep with Andrew last night?” he asks unbelievingly.
“Why are you asking a question that you already know the answer to? If you don’t
know the answer to that then you don’t know me. I slept with Andrew yes but I didn’t
have sex with him” I let out a long sigh, surprised that I don’t feel like crying. “I have
been so up and down since you came here, I don’t even know which way is up any
more. You make me really happy and I’m going to miss you like you wouldn’t believe
but I’m not going to miss the stuff comes along with it. You make me so happy that
you also have the power over me to make me crazy”
“I’m not going to let you walk out on me again”
“I’m not walking out on you Tucker, I’m walking out on us”
“You can’t leave me, I love you Brooke. I want to be with you. Now. Always.”
“I know you love me and I love you too but are you in love with me? There’s a very
big difference. I’m trying to decide which one it is for me. I think you’re in love with
the idea of me. We have so much history that I’m comfortable to you. I know we
have passion but that can run out. Then where would be? Two people who are
relatively attracted to each other but not in love? I can’t live with that possibility. You
mean too much to me for me to risk ever resenting you”
“You really are giving up” he whispers.
“No, I’m taking a step back, If what we have is real then it will never go away” I say
softly
“Are you coming back?”
“That depends” I answer
“On what?”
“A lot of things”
“I’m going to miss you” he wraps his arms around me and squeezes me tightly.
“I’ll miss you too, always” I reply.
He pulls back a little and looks into my eyes. I close them as his lips meet mine but
pull away when he tries to deepen the kiss.
“I can’t do this, I’m sorry” I whisper and kiss him on the cheek. For the second time
in my life I walk away from Tucker not wondering if I’ll ever see him again or wishing
that I won’t but wishing that when I do see him again he finally feels the same way
that I do.
 Chapter Twenty Six
To: Brooke Daniels
From: Lucy Stanton
Subject: Missing you
Date: Friday 2 November 10:58

Morning Brooke!

Just wanted to write to let you know that we all miss you and the past two months
haven’t been the same without you.
I hope that you are getting on okay wherever it is that you are.
I also want you to know that if I hurt you in anyway at all I am so deeply sorry you
don’t understand. I feel like I have lost my best friend and I don’t like it. I would never
intentionally upset you.
Your friends Sophie and Matt came up here, they wasn’t too happy to find out that
you had left town and Sophie went a little crazy at Tucker, it was very fun to watch. I
have never seen a grown man cower before.
The club isn’t the same without you. Andrew hasn’t been on the bar or stage since
you left. Chloe is fitting in well and is now one of the fastest barmaids I have even
seen.
Anyway I miss you and hope to hear (or see) from you soon. Lots of love
Luce xxxxx
 To: Lucy Stanton
From: Brooke Daniels
Subject: RE: Missing you
Date: Friday 9 November 15:23

Hey Luce!!

I’m doing great! I think I really needed to get away, I didn’t realise how stressed
ECT I really was.
You didn’t hurt me so stop worrying about it, I know you would never upset me on
purpose but you haven’t upset me so it doesn’t matter. Stop worrying I love you and
miss you too.
I would have loved to have seen Sophie go off on one as well that’s always very
entertaining (poor Tucker) I’ve been on the end of one of her rants, it’ not pretty.

Is everyone OKAY?
I’m glad Chloe is fitting in, I knew she would!

I really miss everyone and being at the club.

Hope you’re all having fun and the weather is good for you. We have snow… too
cold!
Love you & miss you

B xxxxx
 To: Brooke Daniels
From: Lucy Stanton
Subject: RE: RE: Missing you
Date: Friday 16 November 23:12

Hey girlie,

Everyone’s fine, they all say hello.

Yeah she fit in well, it’s nice because I get a two days off now instead of just one.
The weather here is cold enough but no snow for us (yet).
Where are you by the way? I heard that Tucker went looking for you but had no
luck so he came back here. Have you heard from him?
A lot of the customers at the club ask about you too.
Will has been very quiet since you left and asks everyone everyday if they have
heard from you.
It’s become a little tradition that on a Thursday night they play your bar dance song
and we all do a shot for you.
It would be better if you were here though.
Anyway I’m glad that you’re doing well and feeling better. I didn’t realize you were
stressed. You can always talk to me you know, I’m here for you.
Love you,
Luce xxxxx
 To: Lucy Stanton
From: Brooke Daniels
Subject: RE:RE: RE: Missing you
Date: Friday 23 November 17:30

Hey yourself,

Tell them all I say Hey back :)

I’m glad you get another day off, you deserve it, you work so hard!
I’m not that far away, but far enough.
No I haven’t heard from him. He has my email address but I guess he’s giving me
my space.
Everyone at the club is always so sweet to me, I miss them more than I thought
they would. You’re all like a giant family to me!
Love that you all do a shot for me haha!
I know I can always talk to you and your there for me but how were you supposed
to know that I wasn’t happy when I didn’t even know myself?

I miss you and MAY be home for Christmas.

If you want me back that is?

Lots of love and hugs and kisses

B xxxxx
To: Brooke Daniels
From: Lucy Stanton
Subject: Coming home?
Date: Friday 30 November 09:08

ARE YOU KIDDING ME???

Of course I want you to come back!

Get your sexy little butt back here!!

Are you coming home?

Luce xxxxx
 Chapter Twenty Seven
With help from Chloe and Will I know that tonight is Lucy’s night off but she will be
here with the band and Andrew. I manage to sneak in unnoticed and it wouldn’t
surprise me if the few of the customers that saw me only kept quiet because they
didn’t recognize me. In the three months I was away I put on some weight, not much
but it’s noticeable, I look healthier. I also got rid of my plain brown hair and it’s now a
more chestnut brown/red with blonde highlights, I kept the length though and it has
grown so it goes down just past my breasts. I’m not wearing anything short or flashy
like I normally do when I work at the club. I’m in a cream ruffle skirt that ends
halfway between my bottom and my knees, black ankle boots, a black tee with a
silver scarf tied loosely around my neck. My hair is down and in loose curls pulled in
front of both my shoulders and I have a cream woolly knitted cap style hat on, slightly
sideways to the left where my new fringe covers my left eye almost completely.
Chloe arranged it so at exactly ten the DJ plays my song.
As the song begins to play I walk out of the office and as predicted my friends are
all here sat at their usual table, without them noticing me I jump on the bar and the
club erupts in screams. Not cheers like normal. Ear splitting screams. I laugh and
start my usual dance. Lucy runs up and jumps on the bar alongside me and starts
dancing with me. The rest of my friends all jump up from the table and head over to
the bar. As soon as the song has finished the DJ shouts out ‘Brooke’s back!’ into his
mic and the club erupts into a mixtures of cheers and different shouts of ‘welcome
back’ and ‘we missed you’s.
Lucy wastes no time in pulling me into a long hard hug.
“I can’t believe you’re back!” she exclaims loudly in my ear.
“Uhh .. Lucy … I need to breathe” I rasp out trying to loosen her hold on me a little.
“Oh sorry” she laughs and lets me go.
I take the mic that Chloe is holding out for me and turn to the crown.
“Did y’all miss me?” I call playfully.
“YES!” goes up around me and I laugh at the enthusiasm I see in so many familiar
faces.
“Not as much as I missed all of you”
“Wanna bet?” they all scream at once making me laugh hearing my own
catchphrase thrown back at me. I’ve missed this. This is home for me. I turn to my
friends and catch Andrews’s eye. He’s watching me as if he can’t quite believe I’m
really here.
“What’s the matter honey, cat got your tongue?” I tease surprised that he hasn’t
joined me on the bar with Lucy. He shakes his head at me.
“I’ll be back with you all in a bit. I think there’s some people that want to say hello
to me before I do something silly for you lot” I wink at the crowd and jump down from
the bar with Lucy on the customer side.
As I make my way over to my friends a few people stop me to welcome me back
and offer hugs and kisses. I feel like I’ve spoken to a hundred people when I finally
reach the group. The girls all hug me and the boys all kiss me on the cheek. Well
everyone apart from Andrew and Tucker who haven’t said a word to me yet.
I turn to Andrew first figuring he will be the easiest option. I look up at him and take
in his still shocked expression. “Did you miss me?” I smirk at him, he says nothing for
a few more minutes and then grins and picks me up spinning me around making me
giggle.
“I can’t believe you’re back, you never told anyone you were coming back!” he
shouts over the music at me once he has returned me on my feet.
“I wanted it to be a surprise, if I told you, then it wouldn’t have worked” I laugh at
him.
“Don’t leave again like that again” he scolds
“I won’t. I can’t this is my home. I know that now” I promise him.
Turning to Tucker I watch as he takes in every inch of me. “Hey” I say softly smiling
up at him.
“You look different” he notes not smiling.
“I made a few changes” I shrug not sure if he’s happy to see me or not, his
expression is giving nothing away.
“I see “ Is all he says before he gives me a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek “I
missed you” he tells me still not smiling.
I frown at him but quickly smooth my expression into a smile. “You too” I turn to
the rest of the group. “I need a drink, anyone else?”
“Hell yes!” Cam shouts making us all laugh.
I spend the rest of the night catching up with everyone, listening to the stories of
their nights out and things that have happened at the club. I learn that Mel and
Tommy are now a couple and Lucy has been dating someone for two months now
and is going to introduce me to him tomorrow, none of the guys have met him yet so
I wont be the only one who doesn’t know him. Andrew tells me stories of the girls he
has been out with lately and a very long walk of shame he had to do this morning. A
few times we are interrupted by people coming over to welcome me back and buy
me drinks. Jess is dating Cam now but I don’t think it’s going well, there seems to be
some tension between them. Tucker still doesn’t say much just makes a random
comment here and there. They ask me about what I’ve been doing and where I have
been and I explain how I stayed with Luke and spent some time with my younger
brother Phin. I tell them about some of the nights out we had and replay some of the
things we got up to. Everyone seems happy that I’m back. It’s a bit surprising to see
how much they all truly missed me. I knew before I left that they all cared for me but
it’s true when I say that they are more like family to me than friends and because I’ve
never really had a family it means a lot to me.
“So what can we expect from you now you’re back?” Derek asks. I get the feeling
that he’s not the only one who wants to hear the answer to this.
“How do you mean?”
“Well you obviously went away for a reason, is all that sorted out now? Are you
going to continue being the life of the party? Are you happy?” he clarifies.
“I think I’ve sorted everything out. I’m definitely happier than I have ever been
before. I won’t be dancing on the bar again that earlier when I came in was my last
ever bar dance. I’m not going to take anymore bets that result in me loosing any
clothes. I’m not going to say that I won’t take any more bets at all because we all
know I will” I shrug “I haven’t changed or anything, I’m still me. I missed you all”
“Before you all leave, Brooke, come up here please” Will calls out from the stage
after the DJ calls closing.
I head over to the stage and take the mic Will hands me.
“So your back?” he asks grinning.
“As of Monday, I’m back” I confirm
“What do you mean Monday?” he asks as the crowd groans.
“I’m not leaving town again, I just won’t be back here ‘till Monday. I have a few
things that I need to sort out and it’s going to take up all my time” I confirm.
“Anything you need help with?” he asks and then looks at his mic when he realises
he spoke through it but obviously didn’t mean to.
“No I have a friend helping me, but thanks for the offer”
“Well, welcome back anyway and if you ever think of leaving us again we will chain
you to the stage” he calls through his mic ad then pulls me into yet another hug.
“Now get out of here and we’ll see you Monday” he instructs me making me laugh.
“Yes sir!” I answer and then waving to everyone and calling out ‘goodbye’ I leave
the club and head back to my house.

“Thank you so much for helping me” I call to Luke who is packing boxes up with me
in my bedroom.
“It’s not a problem, you can stop saying thank you now” he grins at me laughing.
“I can’t help it, you have helped me so much these last few months. I owe you big
time”
“Come on, lets go get some proper coffee now we’ve packed up your machine” he
suggests
“Yeah, that was a really bad idea we should have left that until last”
He picks up his keys but I shake my head at him and insist we walk, it’ll do us good
to get some fresh air after spending hours packing up dusting things.
We walk to the nearest coffee shop and then take a detour around town. I grab his
hand and twirl myself under it a few times.
“You’re so happy” he laughs down at me as I do another twirl.
“I’m gad t be home” I grin “No where has ever really felt like home before. I feel
like I belong here”
“I’m glad your happy Brooke, you out of all people deserve it” he kisses my cheek
and we bump into Tucker.
“Hey Tuck. I didn’t know you live here too?” Luke asks him sending me a look that
clearly says I shouldn’t have left that bit of information out.
“Uh yeah … have done for a while now” he answers awkwardly. “Are you moving
up here?” he asks him looking at our joined hands.
“No, just helping Brooke move” Luke answers easily
“You’re moving?” Tucker asks me surprised.
“Yeah to a different house, new start” I shrug at him checking his expression.
Regret? Disappointment? I can’t figure it out.
“Oh, well if you need any extra help….” He trails off.
“Umm actually if you could, I have to go back home tonight” Luke tells him and me
for the first time. I swing my head to him and send him a questioning look. “I’ll be
back tomorrow evening; I just have to pop in to see Katie”
“You’re still with Katie?” Tucker asks looking at our joined hands again.
“Yeah, we’re married now and have a baby girl Olivia she’s six months tomorrow”
Luke tells him proudly making me smile remembering how he is with her.
“Oh, well congratulations mate” Tucker shakes his hand, making Luke drop mine.
“When are you leaving?” I ask him not sure I want Tucker to be helping me. He
hasn’t really spoken to me since I got back.
“As soon as I can really” He tells me. “You’ll help her?” he asks turning to Tucker.
“Of course. Now?” he answers.
“Yeah okay then I’ll head back to the house to get my car, I got a spare sets of
keys so I’ll let myself in and out” He leans in to kiss my cheek “I’ll see you tomorrow,
be good”
“Always am” I smile back at him and watch him leave.
“You okay?” I ask turning to Tucker.
“Sure, shall we?” he gestures for me to continue walking, we make our way back to
the house still not really talking about anything of importance just simple things like
the weather, the club and my new house.
“You’re very quiet” I note as we head upstairs to finish packing what Luke and I
left. “You haven’t really said much since I been back”
“Haven’t I?”
I frown at him still no where near understanding him and return my attention to
packing my life up.
“I went looking for you” Tucker says after a while and we have moved downstairs
now that upstairs is completely packed.
“You did? You could have emailed” I reply softly packing my photos from the front
room.
“I didn’t want to speak to you, I wouldn’t have spoken to you if I found you, I just
wanted to make sure you were okay. That you were happy” he doesn’t look up from
his box while he talks to me.
“Oh … umm … I was fine. I was emailing Lucy every week for the last four or five
weeks before I came back”
“Mmm hmmm” he nods still not looking at me and continues packing.
I collapse on the sofa when everything is boxed up.
“Glad that’s over” I sigh “Ugh I have to unpack it all tomorrow” I grumble when
reality settles in.
“I don’t envy you, I hate moving” Tucker replies helpfully settling in next to me.
“I probably won’t even bother unpacking most of this stuff, just put it in the attic” I
sigh. “I’m starved, I’m going to order Chinese, are you hungry?”
“Uh no .. actually .. if you don’t need me anymore I really should be going” he says
getting up and putting o his jacket.
“Oh .. okay well thanks for helping” I try for a smile but it comes out wonky I’m
sure. He offers a small wave from the door before he closes it behind him.

I eat my food and watch rubbish TV for the rest of the of the night, my mood has
dampened a bit since this morning. I’m still glad I came back but I don’t know why it’s
so awkward between Tucker and I. I don’t know how to fix it and that worries me a
little. I miss him I really do and I love him, I’m not sure how he feels about me though
and that’s what bothers me. I can handle it if he doesn’t want to be with me but I’m
not sure how I’ll deal with it if he doesn’t even want to be my friend. If I learnt
anything over the last three months it’s that I need him in my life.

Luke returns early the next morning and finds me going through some photos from
uni, we sit and reminisce for a few hours before we begin the moving process. I love
my new house it’s a three bedroom, three story house, well four if you include the
attic. The front door leads you into a hallway and it has three doors coming off it, the
first one leads into the coat room, the second one into the kitchen and the third one
into the front room. ,y front room is huge, its got enough room for my new L shaped
sofa, it has a real fire and a curved staircase taking you to the second floor. On this
floor there is two bedrooms and a family bathroom. I have taken the bedroom that
faces into my back yard. The third floor has only one room which is an ensuite. I have
turned this room into my office and reading room. The only room that holds anything
of my life before this moment is the spare bedroom. My university hooded jacket is in
a big frame hung above the room and there are photos of my old group of friends
placed all around the room as well as things from nights out at the club and photos of
all my friends here. The rest of the house just has decoration and art that don’t mean
anything to me, until I gather new things to hang on the walls and to put on the
shelves. I’m sure it won’t take me long to fill this place with new memories. My
favorite new purchase is my bed, it’s a black iron king size and sits below the huge
window in my bedroom. My old bed is in the spare room and I don’t have any
inclination to sleep in that bed ever again. Saying goodbye to Luke we both leave the
house but head in different directions promising to visit each other again soon.
 Chapter Twenty Eight

“You look like crap Brooke” Lucy notes frowning at me. This is the first thing
anyone has said to me since I walked into the club minutes ago. Looking down at
myself I realize I should have changed before I came in. I’m in old jeans and an
oversized tee, tucked in at the front and my hair is piled in a messy bun on top of my
head..
“Thanks, I love you too” I return dryly and head into the office to fix myself a
coffee.
“I hear Brooke’s in the house, get on up here Brooke wherever you are” I hear
Andrew’s voice come through the speakers as I make my way out of the office
hugging my coffee to my chest. I look up and catch his eye from his position on the
bar. “Shit actually stay right there” he says worriedly but I’m already making my way
onto the bar.
“Are you okay?” he asks grabbing my shoulders and searching my face.
“Guess I really do look like crap huh?” I ask half joking.
“What’s happened?”
“Nothing, I’m fine” I snap, fed up of the comments about me looking like hell. I get
the point. He seems to get the message because he leaves it at that.
“How’s everyone doing tonight?” I ask into my mic but my voice sounds dead.
A few people murmur answers and some of my friends look up at me concerned.
“Fuck it” I mutter and pass the mic back to Andrew as I jump back down from the
bar.
I head over to greet the rest of my friends and grab the band their drinks. They all
ask if I’m okay and accept that I’m fine when I say I am. I only last another hour of
serving drinks before I head into the office and curl up on the sofa in there, within a
few minutes I’m fast asleep.
I wake up an hour or two later feeling even more exhausted than before I fell
asleep. I seriously don’t think I’m going to make it home and I’m going to have to
spend the night here. Someone has thrown a blanket over me while I was sleeping
and I wrap it around my shoulders as I head into the bar to get a glass of orange
juice.
“You okay?” Lucy asks as I take a long drink of my juice.
I shake my head at her “I’m exhausted” I admit weakly.
“You look like your going to pass out Brooke” she says looking concerned as I sway
and she grabs my shoulders frowning.
“I’m fine I just need to lie down, I think. I do feel a little dizzy but I’m sure it’s just
because I’m tired”
“Stay here for two minutes for me please, just so I know you’re okay. I can’t keep
an eye on you when you’re in there” she says putting down a stool for me that
someone passes her over the bar.
“Have you eaten today?” she asks as she swaps my empty drink for a new one.
I’m about to answer her but my thoughts drift and the memory of Tucker pushing
me up against the office door and bending me over in the stockroom flash in front of
my mind.
We didn’t use protection…
I haven’t had a period since …
My stomach turns, nausea and dizziness flood me “Uh Luce, I need Jess!” I scream
panicked and throw my hand over my mouth swaying on the stool slightly. I fight
against the black spots clouding my vision and shut my eyes tightly.
“Shit” I hear her mutter and then she calls someone over. A few seconds later I’m
being lifted off the stool onto my feet and steered towards the office I shake my head
furiously “Bathroom!” I cry trying to hold the sick back that’s slowly building it’s way
up. I’m guided into the staff bathroom and set down in front of the toilet where I
throw up my Chinese from last night and my orange juice with a lot of coffee. I dry
heave for a few minutes and then exhaustion settles over me once again.
“Not yet you don’t, let’s get you back in the office” A voice that I think belongs to
Tucker but I’m not sure because I can’t hear it clearly says softly to me.
“I can’t” I croak before accepting the glass of water that comes out of nowhere.
“I’m too tired” I groan.
Two hands land softly on my cheeks and my face is turned. “Open your eyes
Brooke” I obey and find myself looking into a pair of concerned light blue eyes.
Tucker. “What’s wrong with you?” he asks softly.
“I’m fine. I stayed up last night watching TV and lost track of time going through
some of my old things, deciding what to keep and what to throw away, the next thing
I knew it was morning and I spent the day moving house and unpacking everything, I
was so busy I guess I forgot to eat. That’s all there is to it. Honest” I lie and kick
myself for being so careless, I should have just gone to bed but I did promise I would
come in tonight. Maybe I should have just called in.
“Come on” he picks me up and carries me back through the bar into the office and
lays me on the sofa then sits at the top and lifts my head onto his legs so they act as
a pillow. For the next few hours I drift in and out of sleep hearing different
conversations, I can’t make out who’s talking or what they are saying so I relax and
fall back to sleep.
“Come Brooke, wake up, we need to get you home” someone says shaking me
softly.
“I don’t wanna” I mumble back sleepily.
“I know, but you have to and no one knows where you live anymore so you have to
show me”
“Fine” I grumble and sit up rubbing my eyes. Tucker is still in the same position and
I turn to the clock. “Oh my god … I’m so sorry, I was out for hours! You shouldn’t
have stayed so long, sorry” I blink a few times to clear my vision a bit more and
shakily stand up to test my legs.
“Don’t worry about it, I wanted to stay” he says sincerity ringing clearly in his voice
as he throws an arm around my shoulders and leads me out to his car. I give him the
address and fall straight back to sleep as the car starts moving.

I wake up in my bed, with a huge smile on my face as I stretch out completely

relaxed. I frown down at myself when I realize I’m still fully dressed just without my
shoes on, then shrug it off as being too tired to get undressed once Tucker dropped
me off. I’m in such a good mood today that I know it’s going to be an amazing day.
Plugging my IPod into the docking station I turn my music up to full volume and dance
my way into the shower and sing along. Still dancing and singing I throw on a pair of
jeans and a tank, I put my Ipod in my pocket and plug in my earphones. I twirl my
way down the stairs shaking my head and flipping my hair, laughing through the
lyrics.
“Someone’s damn happy this morning”
I spin at the sound of Tuckers voice and come to a complete stop.
“Jesus you scared the shit out of me!” I complain clutching my chest.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt” he says waving a hand for me to continue
looking amused.
“I hope you made a pot” I warn watching him drink his coffee.
“Of course” he hands me a mug that’s warm enough to drink without waiting for it
to cool a bit.
“Umm … you stayed the night?” I guess, not remembering much past getting in his
car last night, I just assumed he dropped me off.
“Yeah, I stayed in the spare room, which is like a time capsule for you’re life by the
way” he notes.
“Oh … umm why did you stay?” I ask not trying to be rude but just curious.
“You asked me too” he frowns at me.
“Oh … I don’t really remember anything past getting in your car after the club” I
admit “Anyway I don’t care, I’m in such a good mood today that nothing else
matters” I grin at him making him smile.
“Can I ask why you are in such a good mood?”
“I don’t really know to be honest, I just feel relaxed, happy, rested and sort of free”
I explain as best that I can.
“Well I’m happy you’re happy” he grins at me “What’s your plans for today?”
“I have some paperwork to do for the office that I’m going to do upstairs, then I’m
having dinner with Andrew and then I’ll be at the club tonight. What about you?”
“I have a few things I need to do this morning but I’ll be at the club tonight”
“Okay well I guess I’ll see you later ten” I walk him to the door.
“Be good” he kisses my cheek and leaves.
My good mood doesn’t last long when I remember my discovery last night, with a
quick text to Jess I leave my house praying for a miracle, what that miracle is though,
I don’t know.

***

Ten hours ago I found out I’m pregnant.

I’m with child.
I have a bun in the oven.
There is a baby growing inside me.
I’m knocked up.
I took six tests, then I sent Jess out for another ten.
They were all positive. Then we went to the doctors, where I discovered I’m not just
pregnant, I’m sixteen weeks pregnant.
I think I could possibly be in shock.
Never the less, Jess was relentless, she wouldn’t let me call in and sign the club
over to Will, she wouldn’t let me sell my house, she also wouldn’t let me pack my bag
and run away. Trust me. I tired.
After promising me she wouldn’t tell a soul, she helped me get ready for work and
now we’re walking through the club, her arm wrapped tightly around my waist, this I
think, is her way of stopping me turning around and running away, not that I would.
At least not right away.
A few people send us curious looks as we get closer to the bar and Jess squeezes
me tightly when we stop opposite it.
“You’re going to have to snap out of it Brooke. People will start asking questions
otherwise” she whispers.
I open my mouth tell her I agree but no words come out, instead I swallow and
nod.
“Uh .. maybe we should go around the bar, you probably shouldn’t be climbing
over it” she frowns at the bar.
I glare at her “I’m not disabled” I snap.
“Jeeze” she mutters but then a loud cheer further down the bar distracts us both.
A few feet down the bar a topless blonde is led down and Tucker is doing a body
 A few feet down the bar a topless blonde is led down and Tucker is doing a body
shot off her. Anger washes over me. Not jealousy, anger.
“Great. I can’t even drink anymore!” I throw my head back.
“No coffee either” Jess reminds me, unhelpfully.
“So tell me oh great one, what can I fucking do?” I demand, loosing the hold on my
emotions completely.
Jess backs up a step and watches me wearily, guess a pissed off pregnant woman
is more than she can handle. I push past her and walk around the bar, storming
straight into Wills office.
“Hey Brooke ...” he trails off and his smile fades when he see’s my expression.
“I’m pregnant. I can’t drink. I can’t carry anything heavy. I can’t drink coffee. I
can’t do NOTHING!!!” I scream the last part.
“You’re pregnant?” he asks breaking out into a smile.
“Don’t you fucking dare!” I shout at him, pointing a finger and taking a step back
when he stands from his desk. “I only found out today, I’m four months pregnant!
What the fuck am I supposed to do?!”
“Uh ... calm your language?” he smirks at me.
“It’s not funny!” I start pacing “I don’t want anyone to know, hell, I don’t even want
to know”
“Brooke!”
I spin around, stopping my pacing mid step at his shout.
“Calm down. Stress is no good for the baby. I can see why you’d freak out, you’re
young but... you have so many people to help you through this that you can’t go
wrong.”
“It can go wrong” I mutter and then leave the office.
I climb up onto the bar and grab a mic, the DJ lowers the music when he notices
me. I take a few minutes to look at everyone in the crowd and I’m struck with the
memory of when I returned and how happy everyone was to have me back.
“I almost left you all again today” I say into the mic.
I feel all the attention of the club turn to me, Andrew joins me on the bar with his
own mic.
“I did, I was going to sign the club over to Will, sell my house and leave. Never to
return”
“Why?” Andrew asks cautiously.
“Jess wouldn’t let me though” I turn to him.
All eyes swing to Jess and I watch as she shifts nervously but keeping her
concerned eyes on me.
“Why did you want to go?” Andrew asks coming closer to me slowly.
“I still want to, I just have to figure out how to do it without Jess finding out and
stopping me. Besides she threatened to come find me and drag me back”
A few laughs go up around us but they sound nervous, even to my ears. I turn
when I hear low voices behind me and find Will talking to a concerned looking Lucy.
“Everything can go wrong” I say into my mic, Will looks up at me “And when it
concerns me and my life, everything always go wrong”
“Brooke, I thought you we’re sorted now” Andrew asks and I can see the confusion
on his face.
Will jumps up on the bar with us, apparently I feel more comfortable talking into a
mic, in front of a hundred people. Then I realize, I do, because up here, we have to
filter what we say, to a certain extent. I look down at Lucy and Chloe. “We need
shots” I tell them.
They hand us each a shot “Keep them coming” I tell Lucy, she sends me a look but
does it anyway. I turn back to Will and Andrew, Andrew is looking down at his shot but
Will has his eyes on the shot in my hand. I catch Jess’s eye and motion for her to join
me, when she does I hand her my shot.
“Stability, that’s you’re first one” I gesture for them all to take the shot and Lucy
and Chloe hand out another one “Everyone needs stability in their lives”
“Brooke?” Andrew asks again.
I ignore him “Stability can come in a number of forms. It can be a place,
somewhere to go. It can be a person, someone to rely on. Someone who no matter
what, they’ll be there. Beauty, that’s you’re next shot”
The club is silent now as everyone watches Will, Andrew and Jess take their shots
and then all eyes return to me. I turn my eyes to Will “You don’t know this about me”
I turn my back to him and lift my hair so he can see the tattoo on the back of my
neck “Do you know why I got that?” he shakes his head at me “It cover a scar, I don’t
have many scars. I never talk about them either, no one knows about them” my eyes
fly to Tucker in the crows and he’s frowning at me “Do you think I need another
one?” I ask him.
I don’t look to see if he answers me or not “One more shot Luce” Lucy hands them
all another shot and once again all attention is on me.
“Strength” I shrug and gesture for them to do the shots “We all need some
strength in our lives”
I walk up to Will and lower my mic, speaking to him directly now but it’s so quiet
that I’m sure even people on the other side of the club can hear me.
“I can go on all night but just those three things. I don’t have any of them. So yeah,
everything can go wrong. Do you know what the first thought I had earlier was? I
wanted to speak to my mom” I laugh, it probably sounds insane “I wanted to talk to
her! I hate her and I wanted no I need to talk to her. Do you have any idea how
fucked up that is?”
“Brooke, maybe we should go into the office” Will says quietly, I can see that he’s
confused. He doesn’t understand. No one does.
I lower my self so I’m sitting on the bar and lift the mic to my mouth as I look up at
Andrew. I smile up at him “Wanna sleep over tonight?” I wink at him.
“Uh .. last time I spent the night with you Brooke, you left town the next day” He
smirks at me.
“You were just that good. I needed to be a few towns away so I wouldn’t jump
you.” I laugh.
Everyone visibly relaxes and the atmosphere in the club lifts as the banter returns
to normal.
“Well ... I don’t normally do repeats but ... you’re bed sure is comfy”
I laugh “We won’t get much sleep though”
“I’m counting on that” he winks at me.
“Come down here” I smile freely. A warm feeling takes over me as Andrew lowers
himself down to the bar. I throw my arms around him and pull him closer to me,
squeezing him. Will was right, I do have people in my life that will help me. Maybe I
can do this. “You know I love you, right?” I whisper to him, a tear rolling down my
cheek.
He pulls away from me and his eyes scan my face as he wipes my tears away but
more keep falling “Hey” he calls quietly.
Jess starts laughing so we both look up at her, Andrew frowns at her but she just
sends me a knowing look.

***

Andrew is carrying me through the bar bridal style. He’s laughing, I’m fuming.
 He places me on the bar before we even get a chance to greet anyone a mic is
being pushed into my hand.
“Brooke has a little problem” he tells the crowd.
I glower at him “Andrew, I swear to go!” I shout at him through my mic.
“Why don’t you tell people what happened last night” he laughs and steps back to
avoid my slap.
“You slept on the sofa!” I scream.
“And why is that?” he smirks at me.
“Because you’re .... incompetent” I smirk at the laughs that go up around us and
jump off the bar, heading straight for Jess.
“You gotta help me” I beg.
“What’s wrong?” he runs her eyes over and her expression turns to panic “is
everything okay?”
“I need to get laid, like yesterday” I hiss at her.
She opens her mouth a few times then closes it again before she bursts out
laughing.
I stomp away from her and find Tucker sat at a table with a woman. They both look
up at me when I reach them.
“Everything okay Brooke?” Tucker asks.
“Nope” I answer instantly and flop down in the chair next to him, looking longingly
at his beer. Maybe one wont hurt ... after all I‘d been drinking for the first fifteen
weeks of this.
“Brooke?” Tuckers voice pulls me away from my thoughts and I drag my eyes
away from his bottle, it occurs to me that he’s waiting for me to answer something, I
didn’t hear the question so I mutter a quick “nothing” and rush to the bar.
I spend a couple of hours serving drinks but my mind isn’t completely on it. I know
this when Lucy has to call my name to get my attention when I’ve been staring at
space, or practically drooling over a bottle of beer. When I look around the bar I spot
Cam and Jamie sitting alone, I wonder down the bar to them and smile mischievously
at them, they both groan.
“Cam, can I borrow you for a while?” I ask sweetly.
“What are you going to do to me?” he asks cautiously.
“I’m going to get you wasted”
“Well okay then” he grins at me. I motion for him to join me on my side of the bar
and pull him towards the office, a few cheers go up as I push him into the office, Will
looks up at us.
“I need the office for an hour... or two”
His eyebrows jump up into his hairline causing me to giggle and Cam clears his
throat looking rather uncomfortable “Or you can join us” I offer.
Both men turn to me with matching incredulous expressions. I laugh and shaking
my head go back to the bar. When I return to the office with two glasses and a bottle
of Jack Daniels they both fall silent.
“All you have to do is sit with me and drink this” I hold up the bottle. They both
exchange a look but nod at me.
No one talks as I sit pouring the Jack Daniels and watch them drink them. When the
bottle is finally empty I’m holding back a laugh and silently trying to work out which
one of them will pass out first.
“Thank you” I manage to say without my voice cracking but the humour in it is
obvious. They both scowl at me.
Cam stands and stumbles slightly but after a few minutes I get my laughter under
control and wrap his arm around my shoulder, hooking my arm around his waist I let
him lean most of his weight on me and help him back out to the bar.
him lean most of his weight on me and help him back out to the bar.
As we make our way back around to the customer side, cheering, laughing and
shouted comments greet us. I laugh more when Cam trips but stop when I come face
to face with Andrew, Tucker and Jess. They are all frowning at me but Jess looks
concerned as she takes in me holding most of Cams weight.
 Chapter Twenty Nine
It’s really no surprised that I find myself entering the club via being thrown over
Andrews shoulder so I don’t even attempt to fight him on it.
“You know this is one of the reason you and I have so much trouble dating, people
dating us think this weird, they probably have a point” I point out as he lands a playful
slap on my backside. People cheer as we make our way through the club and I wave
at them knowing if I asked for help they’d only laugh at me. He turns me so that I’m
facing a laughing Lucy and a tutting Tucker also two men I have never met before.
“I’d ask what happened but I’ll introduce you first. Brooke this is Jack, Jack, Brooke”
I turn to look at Jack and am impressed, even upside down I can tell he is very good
looking.
“Hey” I grin at him and attempt to shake his hand but It doesn’t work.
“Lucy’s told me a lot about you” he says giving up on the hand shake as well. “This
is my friend Ben” Andrew turns so I’m facing Ben and I offer a weak hello. He is also
good looking. “I’ll give any of you five hundred to kick this guy’s ass and get me
down?” I beg.
“What happened?” Lucy finally asks.
“I lost a bet” I sigh
“I thought you weren’t going to take anymore bets” Tucker notes.
“He tricked me into it!” I turn my pout on Tucker “Would you help me down for five
hundred?”
“No I’d pay five hundred to see what ever it is you have to do though” he laughs at
my weak attempt to get out of it.
“Fine lets get it over with” I mutter grumpily
Once Andrew has set me on the bar with my mic he finally whispers to me what I
have got to do.
“Nuh uh, I can’t do that” I insist.
“Why not? It’s only a bit of fun Brooke; you don’t have to take it any further”
“Just pick something else please, one that I have to do alone”
“Have you got a secret boyfriend somewhere you’re not telling me about?”
“Andrew please let’s just get on with it”
“Who is it Brooke?” he asks curiously but offended at the same time. It’s then I
notice that we have seen talking quietly to each other and the whole club has gone
silent watching us.
“How about a free round of drinks while Andrew thinks of something suitable for
me to do huh?” I call through my mic smiling at everyone, they all cheer and head to
the bar so I jump down behind it and watch as Lucy jumps over to help me and Chloe.
“What was that about?” Lucy asks me between handing out drinks.
“He wanted me to kiss someone from the crowd” I tell her distractedly.
“Right, why didn’t you do it? You’ve done it before; you could have played it off as a
kiss on the cheek or something”
“I just didn’t feel comfortable doing is all” I shrug.
“You know he will think of something even worse now for you to do because you
forfeited it” she shakes her head at me.
“I know” I grin over at her and gesture with my head to where Andrew is sat at the
bottom of the bar deep in thought. I love making him have to think of something else.
He must be running out of ideas by now. We both laugh as we watch him struggle to
decide what to do.
 “What’s with the free drinks then? Normally you only do that if something bad is
going on and you want to distract people?” she asks turning her attention back to the
customers.
“That was just to buy me some more time and because I’m in a good mood so I’ll
put the money in for them all, your adding yours up right?” I check as I move from
the now empty half of the bar and jump over to the customer side..
“Yeap and Chloe knows the drill as well” she assures me “Where are you going?”
“To dance” I grin and duck through the crowd.
“Hello” I smile at the band as I reach their table. “What did you refuse to do?” Cam
asks gesturing towards Andrew who’s still say in the same position that I left him in.
“Nothing exciting” I assure him.
“So what can we do for you?” Tucker asks.
“I wanna dance” I pout at everyone sat at the table “Will one of you dance with me
please?”
“I will” Cam volunteers.
“Uh .. I kind of only asked you lot because I want to dance with someone who won’t
feel me up. I’d ask Andrew but he’s busy …. That means your out sorry Cam” I shrug
apologetically as the rest of the guys laugh at him and he grins at me.
“Come on” Tucker says standing.
“You’re not serious. I said someone who won’t touch me” I raise an eye brow ay
him.
“You don’t think I can dance with you without touching you?” he asks disbelievingly.
“No, I know you can’t”
“Want to bet on that?”
“Fine” I shrug knowing I’ll win this one hands down.
“If I win you have to do whatever it was that Andrew asked you asked you to do
earlier and if you win I will do whatever next challenge Andrew gives you”
“I’ll accept that” I grin at him and we head off to the slowly filling dance floor.
We mess around for while twirling each other around and under our arms, we do a
weird clubbers version of the tango, we do the chicken, the running man and some
other moves that were so strange I don’t even think they are worth having a name.
We are both doing the moonwalk when a slow song comes on and we come to a
mutual decision to dance to this one properly while catching our breath.
Tucker is careful to keep his hands on my hips and not moving them an inch while
my hands go behind his neck and I mindlessly play with his hair.
“I’m glad you’re back Brooke” Tucker smiles down softly at me.
“Me too, this place really feels like home, you know”
“Yeah, I know. Your not going to leave like that again are you?”
“No, I just needed to sort myself out, emotionally I was all over the place before I
left and now I feel more grounded and level headed. I know what I want and what I
need now not just what I think I want and need”
“When you left a lot of things became clear for me too” he admits quietly.
“Like…” I prompt
“Before you left I think I took advantage of having you back in my life, I guess a
part of me thought that being with you is what I wanted because it was familiar and I
took advantage of that and hurt you in the process.. but now … but now after having
spent three months away from you I know I don’t want you in my life I need you in it”
“I guess we both came to the same conclusion then” I say quietly back to him.
“So where does that leave us?” he asks watching my eyes intently.
“Dancing a slow dance to a fast song in the middle of my club with about fifty
people watching us curiously” I smirk at him glancing around at our audience.
“Well we can’t have that” he mummers bringing his face down to mine and kissing
me softly, the crowd cheers and the kiss deepens, when a few random shouts go up
around us we pull apart. “Guess I lost the bet huh?”
“Yes and no” I tell him laughing.
“What do you mean?” he frowns at me
“Well you lost our bet and now you have to do whatever challenge Andrew cooks
up for me but I don’t think he’s going to have to anymore because the first one was
that I had to kiss someone in the club”
“I’m glad you refused it” he says softly against my lips.
“Me too” I agree falling into a long kiss again until we hear someone clearing their
throat over through the speakers. I look up to see Andrew standing on the bar.
“Tucker doesn’t count so you still have to do something else and I say we throw
you’re no more bar dancing rule and you do one for loosing the bet earlier” Andrew
says without preamble.
I grin up at Tucker who now looks slightly nervous because he has to do my next
challenge so technically he’s the one who has to dance on the bar but I take pity on
him and grab his hand to get his attention.
“Want some help? I have an idea” I nod over at Andrew and head to the stage and
picking up a mic for myself I pass one to Tucker as well. “Can you guys do a cover of
the song like the first night I had to do it?” I ask as he gestures for the rest of the
band to join us.
“I lost another bet guys” I call into my mic addressing the crowd “Are you ready for
another dance?” the crowd all cheer.
“I lost a bet too” Tucker sighs into his mic and all the women in the club start
cheering and whistling “So I have to dance too” he pouts and the female cheers turn
into screams. “I think I have more fans than you Brooke” he says into his mic grinning
at me.
“I’m not hearing it sorry” I shake my head as I call into the mic and the male
cheers go up over the female ones making Tucker chuckle and then strip out of his
shirt leaving him in just a tight white tee. I actually have to cover my ears to try and
block out the ringing in them from the shrieks that are drowning out everything else
in the club.
I watch as Tucker turns to me smirking and raises an eyebrow at me in challenge, I
smile sweetly at him and start unbuttoning my jeans. Both his eyebrows shoot up and
Andrew’s voice comes over the speakers “Uhh … Brooke?” he tries for a warning
tone but it comes out questioning and slightly, nervous? I ignore him and pull my
jeans off leaving me in a black shirt and black hot pants with my stilettos.
The male cheers come out as a loud roar and I take a bow, I can hear the band
laughing behind us making me giggle.
I watch as Tuckers eyes lazing travel down my legs and back up again and he
swallows noticeably. Shaking his head and grinning at me he looses his tee. I don’t
know if we are doing to tease the crowd or each other anymore as I can feel myself
grow more and more turned on by his strip tease. I know why he’s grinning he knows
the only thing I have available to take off now is my shirt, he also knows I’m not
wearing a bikini top underneath because from below the top three buttons that are
undone you can see lace. He also knows I wouldn’t ever leave myself in just a bra.
What he doesn’t know however is that what I am wearing underneath my shirt is not
a bra.
I angle my body so only Tucker has a view of my front. “Are you sure you want to
play this game with me?” I ask sweetly unbuttoning my shirt slowly to reveal the red
with white lace corset top which laces up at the front that I’m wearing. Before I reach
the bottom button of my shirt Tuckers hands are moving mine out of the way and
working the buttons back up so fast he misses one and has to start again. “What are
you doing?” I ask laughing at his concentrated expression.
“I’m thinking we should play this game when we are alone because I really want to
know what you’re wearing under those shorts to match that” he replies tightly his mic
resting between his legs so only I can hear.
I lower my mic and lean into his ear running my tongue along the outline of it
teasingly “Nothing” I whisper in answer to his question. He stops fumbling with my
buttons, in fact he freezes all together. A few shouts of ‘what’s going on’ bring him
out of his daze and he throws me over his shoulder. I leave the club exactly like I
entered it, upside down and not bothering to fight it.
 Chapter Thirty

“I take it you had a good night last night?”

Lucy asks me smirking.
“What are you talking about?” I turn my attention from the group of students in
front of me to frown at her in confusion.
“I’m talking about the matching grins that you and Tucker have been wearing all
night”
I turn my head and follow her eyes to the table the band are sitting around and
sure enough Tucker is grinning to himself, as if he can feel my eyes on him he turns
and throws me a wink making Lucy giggle and me roll my eyes.
“It was alright” I wink at her.
The DJ starts playing Footloose and I grab Lucy’s hand and start dancing with her
behind the bar much to the customer’s amusement.
We laugh our way through it doing some really cheesy dancing and the people at
the bar start clapping along with the beat as Lucy and I sing to them. The DJ notices
what we are doing and gestures for us to get on the bar so with help from Will we
both climb up and continue our dancing/laughing/singing as the music changes from
show tune to show tune. The whole club is caught up in our laughter and some people
are copying our moves and others signing along with us once the music shuts down
ready for the band to go up, we jump down to catch our breath.
“I’m getting to old for this” I complain draining a glass of water.
“You love it really” Lucy shakes her head at me still laughing. “Oooh just in time”
“What?” I ask following her gaze and the stag party has just arrived I hold back a
sigh and wince inwardly. The best man booked the stag due but I didn’t realize who
the stag was. “Please tell me that isn’t who I think it is” I beg to Lucy turning my
pleading eyes on her.
“Afraid so ... that would be Jason the lip ring stud” she sighs dramatically. Looks like
you lost your chance with him. “I hope they behave, they look like they’ve drunk a
truck load already” she notes watching them stumble and being excessively loud.
“I’ll go welcome them and check it out”
I jump over the bar and shake my head laughing at Tucker and his female fan
group, standing at the bottom of the stage chanting for him to take his top off again. I
catch his eye and send him a mock glare he smirks at me and shrugs his shoulders
but then frowns and sends me a very real glare, I soon realize why when I’m lifted off
my feet from behind and carried to the stag table. I’m put down on Jason’s lap. I
don’t make any attempt to move deciding how best to deal with these guys. Lucy was
right they have had a hell of a lot to drink already and I don’t want to upset them or
cause any problems.
“You guys doing okay?” I ask plastering on my biggest smile.
“We are now” Jason grins at me bouncing me on his knee.
“Are you going to drink with us?” One of his friends asks excitedly.
“Only one” I agree and gesture for Lucy to bring me over a round for the table.
“It’s my last night of freedom tonight” Jason says in my ear while wrapping an arm
around my middle.
“And what are you going to do with it?” I smile at him trying to hide how
uncomfortable I feel.
“I think you’re what he’s going to do with it darling” One of the boys announces
and the whole table laughs appreciatively. Jason leans in and kisses my cheek pulling
me tighter against him. I look around for a friendly face and meet Lucy’s eyes as she
makes her way to us carrying a tray of drinks. I try to send her a message of help
with just my eyes but I don’t think she understands as she only smiles back.
“Here you go” she says to us all as she hands out the bottles of beer. “Who’s the
lucky lady then?” she asks Jason moving her head to look behind me.
“For tonight, Brooke is” He tells her making her frown.
“I don’t understand” she admits making me roll my eyes.
“Well I’ve heard good things about how this one is in the bedroom and I refused to
get married without trying her out” he says tatter of factly and feel my jaw fall open.
“Who told you that?” I demand twisting in his lap.
“I did” comes from beside me and I turn to look at the voice I recognize from the
phone booking for this party, I look him over from his brown eyes, shaggy dark
brown/ almost black hair, his nose that looks like it may have been broken once
before and he has a small scar on the left side of his jaw, he looks like the ultimate
bad boy in his black jeans, black boots and black tee, it’s then I notice the tattoo on
his right arm and recognition hits me. Memories from that drunken night a few years
ago all come back. “Do you still do that thing with your …” he starts but Lucy cuts him
off grabbing my arm.
“Umm , I need you to help me a second at the bar, there’s a problem” she pulls me
up from the Jason’s lap and with promises to return I follow her to the bar.
“Who is that guy and what was he talking about?” she demands clearly shocked
because no one has ever met anyone I have ever slept with before apart from
Tucker. Because there is no one else, apart from that guy.
“I’ve had sex with him” I say quietly so we can’t be over heard.
“I gathered that but who is he and when?” she says gesturing with her arms
impatiently.
“When I first moved up here, you know after everything that happened with Tucker
back at uni, I needed a rebound and well, you just met him”
“He’s hot, maybe even more so than Tucker”
“Who’s hotter than me?”
We both spin around at the sound of Tuckers voice, he’s stood on the other side of
the bar watching us curiously.
“Uh … me?” I say not wanting to tell him what we are actually talking about and
flipping through the planner under the bar.
“What are you looking for?” Lucy asks, I glare at her and she snort “You can’t
remember his name?” she asks incredulously.
We are joined by Jason and his best man just as I find what I was looking for. I look
up smiling.
“Jason, Nick. What can I do for you?” I ask and immediately regret it when they
both smirk at me.
“Do you have any more tattoos?” Lucy asks Nick eyeing the one his arm.
“Yes“ I answer for him before he has a chance to speak.
“So you do remember, for a second there I thought you had forgotten” he grins at
me “So tell me Brooke, how many do I have?”
I can feel Tuckers eyes on me but ignore it “Six” I say watching Lucy not Nick or
Tucker.
“Six?” Lucy asks impressed “Where?” she asks me.
I kick her ankle behind the bar where no one can see the action only her wincing.
“I have this one on my arm, one across the back of my shoulders, one behind my
ear, one across my side, and one on my chest” Nick answers her for me.
“That’s only five” Lucy says making me turn red.
“Why don’t you tell her about your favorite one Brooke?” Nick says, I can hear the
amusement in his voice and want nothing more than for the ground to swallow me up
in this moment.
“He has a small inscription running from hip to hip … I think I traced every letter
with my tongue or something. I made a really bit deal about it” I whisper in her ear
mortified.
I step back from her and watch as she throws her hand over her mouth, at first I
think it’s in shock but then a small laugh escapes through her fingers.
“Now do you understand why I want to ...” Jason starts grinning but I cut him off. I
seriously need to get Tucker away from this conversation.
“Shouldn’t you be on stage singing or something?” I ask him but cringe at how
harsh it sounded.
“The guys are taking a break a minute and I wanted a word … alone” he snaps
back at me.
“Sure, come into the office” I gesture for him to come around the bar.
“Good luck” Lucy whispers as I walk past her following him into the office.
“What the hell is that all about out there?” he demands as soon as the door is shut.
“Uh… “ Will says weakly from the desk “I’ll just give you two a minute”
“Thanks” I call to the door as he shuts it behind him.
“Who are those men?” Tucker asks watching me closely “I remember the one,
didn’t you date him?”
“Uh no, I didn’t date Jason that’s the one with the lip ring”
“And the other one?”
“Nick … well remember when I told you that apart from one other person you were
the only one I’ve ever had sex with … he’s the other one”
“He’s the one you used to try and forget me?” he asks carefully.
“Yes” I answer nervously, not sure where he’s going with this.
“How long were you sleeping with him?”
“Just one night”
“Really, because he seems to remember it well for just night one”
“I was drunk … and quite enthusiastic” Why am I telling him this?.
“I don’t like that he’s here, can’t you kick him out or something? I don’t like you
talking to him, knowing that you two have been with each other”
I check his expression looking for any signs of a joke but all I see is complete
honesty, a little anger and seriousness. “You cannot be serious” I shake my head at
him and walk back into the bar.
“Whoa what’s with the look” Lucy asks grabbing my arm and pulling me aside.
“What look?” I snap at her.
“Forget I asked” she lifts her hands in a defensive gesture and steps aside. I carry
on past her and head over to Jess’s table. I grab a glass of water.
“You okay honey?” she asks softly watching me chug the water.
“Tucker has issues with me being in the same room as one person that I have had
sex with one! That’s how many other men I’ve been with apart from him and he
doesn’t like it yet I have to speak to and see, forget the fact that I am best friends
with two of the people he’s slept with an god knows how ever many more there are in
here just tonight. I had people come up to me in university and tell me all about it in
details after they spent a night with him and he has a problem because of one
fucking guy”
“What are you going to do?”
I think over all the times in university when Tucker showed his possessive side and
come to one conclusion. “Distract him” I grin at her and go into the staff toilet with
adjoining locker room.
 I keep a few spare dresses and things in my locker just in case I ever find myself
missing clothing because of a bet again and I select the dress that I know will work
best to my advantage.
As I walk into the bar again ignore the stares I’m getting and head back over to
Jess, there is nothing revealing about my dress only the fact that it is fire engine red,
fits me like a second skin and is only transparent lace in certain parts.
“Come be a groupie with me” I tug on her arm and pull her towards the front of
the stage where Tucker and the rest of the band are in mid song.
We start dancing along to the music and I hear Tucker stutter a few lyrics when I
look up he is staring at me with unadulterated heat in his eyes, I do a little twirl for
him and he shakes his head chuckling at me. I ignore him for the rest of the set and
dance with Jess, screaming his name when everyone else does and even joining in
with the pleas for him to take his top off much to his amusement. Jason and Nick join
us and start dancing with us both, but Jess pulls me into her when Jason puts his
hands on my hips, he pulls me away from her.
“Are you coming home with me tonight?” he asks in my ear rather loudly getting
straight to the point.
I shake my head at him, he pouts.
“Are you with someone?” he asks me not put off.
I nod at him against his cheek because he doesn’t move back from my ear this
time.
“Who?” he leans back after he asks this time I point up to Tucker who’s watching
us. “He can come too” he offers making me hold back my smirk but I don’t think I do
it well enough, just the thought of suggesting that to Tucker makes me want to snort
unbelievably.
I shake my head at him furiously letting him know that isn’t an option.
“Why not” he persists
“I love him” I shrug and shout up at him. He looks back at Tucker and then to me
then shakes his head smiling sweetly.
“He’s a lucky guy, you’re a very amazing woman Brooke. One of a kind” he says
into my ear and kisses my cheek. I reach up and hug him quickly.
“Thank you, but I’m the lucky one” he laughs softly and walks off taking Nick with
him.
I watch Jess watch Nick making his way through the crowd and shake my head at
her laughing at the disappointment on her face.
“Who was that?” she demands.
“Jason is the one who was talking to me, he is getting married tomorrow I think ...
and the other one was Nick”
“Please tell me that Jason is the guy you were referring to earlier that Tucker didn’t
want you speaking to” She says hopefully. This is one of the reason I love Jess, she is
a firm believer of the never sleep with a guy one of you’re girlfriends has and she
obviously fancies Nick.
“No, it was Nick” I laugh as her face falls.
“Then what the hell are you doing with him?” she points up at Tucker.
“I only slept with Nick to try and forget about Tucker … it didn’t work” I shrug at
her and wink at Tucker as the song ends and club cheers asking for more.
He turns to the band and says something to them then turn back to the crowd and
holds up his mic.
The crowd goes quiet.
“I believe you and I have a bet we need to finish” he says into the mic looking
directly at me. I climb up on to the stage as the band start playing my bar dance
theme song ‘bad girlfriend’ I start dancing as soon as Tucker starts singing. Once the
chorus starts I dance with Tucker, doing the same dance I used to do on the bar but
change it so it includes him, he puts his free hand on my hips as I shake against his
groin and put my hands above my head around his neck, he notices how some of the
dancing is going with the words of the song so when he sings the lyrics ‘I like to strip
her down, she’s naughty ‘till the end’ he runs his hands up my leg lifting the bottom of
my dress up teasingly then grabs my arm and spins me out and back into him as his
sings how there’s no doubt I’m a bad, bad girlfriend. The crowd eat it up and go wild,
screaming and whistling. As the song comes to an end we both take a bow. The
crowd applause but over it I hear Jess shouting “I hate you Tucker Lloyd!” I burst out
laughing and Tucker just looks back and for us looking confused. I shake my head at
him, not able to talk through laughing; he wraps both arms around me pulling my
back into his chest and kisses my cheek.
“Have I told you today that I love you?” he smiles against my ear.
I shrug “I could hear it again”
“I love you”
“Uh … good because I have something I need to tell you”
Tuckers whole body tenses behind me. “What is it?” he asks slowly.
I turn my head to look up at him and take a deep breath preparing myself.
“I’m pregnant”
His eyes roam my face for a few seconds and I hear the mic drop our of his hands
and hit the floor. “How? Isn’t it a bit soon for you to know that..” he asks quietly.
“I … ah … it wasn’t … Tucker, I’m four months pregnant. I didn’t find out until a few
days ago. I got pregnant way before I left, we didn’t … we weren’t safe the first two
times ...” I trail off helplessly.
“You’re .. we’re … shit” he spins me around and crushes me against him.
“I need to breathe” I manage to get out, his hold on me loosens slightly.
“I need you” I says quietly in my ear and then picks me up and takes me home.
 Chapter Thirty One
The next few weeks pass in a blur. Tucker and I have been near inseparable, we
spend almost every night together, usually at my house – I still haven’t stepped foot
in his. I’m not going to say that we have just fallen into the relationship and
everything is easy and going good because we do have our moments and we clash
on a lot of things. Tucker broke the news to the band and with a little pushing from
Jess, I finally told Mel and Lucy. The only person we have left to tell is Andrew, Matt
and Sophie. Andrew is the one person I’m most nervous about telling, it’s not that I
think he won’t take the news well, it’s just that Andrew’s a bit protective of me and
since I’m now twenty two weeks pregnant and we have found out that I’m having a
girl, I have a feeling he will be treating me as if I’m made of glass.
“Uh … Brooke, what are you doing?”
I look up at Jess’s amused expression.
“What? I frown at her.
We’re in the coffee shop and I’m drinking tea. Yes, I Brooke Daniels, the woman
who literally salivates at the smell of coffee brewing is drinking tea.
“You’re dipping a muffin in your drink” her voice is full of humor but her expression
is one of disbelief.
“It’s good” I shrug at her and dip my blackberry muffin into my tea and wave it in
her face before pushing it into my mouth. “You should try it”
“I’m okay thanks” she smirks “So what’s with the outfit?”
I look down at my self, I’m wearing my old university hoodie that swallows me and
a pair of sweats. Basically, I look like a homeless person. I screw my face up “You
know, I used to dress like this to pretend I was overweight, now I’m dressing like this
to hide the fact that I’m no longer in good shape”
“What are you talking about? You have a great body” she laughs at me.
I stand from the table and shake my head “I woke up this morning and I had this” I
lift my hoodie up showing her my tight tee that hugs my small bump.
“Awww” she cries and rubs her hand over it “Why are you hiding this? It’s so cute!”
“It is not!” I cover myself back up and sit down with a huff “I swear it was like
someone inflated me while I was sleeping last night. I woke up this morning and it
was just there. I’m hiding it from Tucker”
“No offense honey, but you go into the club dressed like that and he’s likely to strip
you down to see what you’re hiding” her voice is once again full of humor.
Jess spends a lot of her time teasing Tucker on how he is around me since finding
out I’m with child. It’s sweet but annoying as hell.
“I’m not going to the club like this” I sigh, collecting my bags “I’m going to wear a
loose fitting dress and just hope he thinks it’s cute enough not to question”
“Good luck with that” She smirks at me.
We say our goodbyes and both head in separate directions to get ready for the
night ahead of us.

Unfortunately, by the time I get to work that night, I’m a mess. I push my way
through the crowds with my head down and avoid contact with everyone, making my
way towards the bar. A few people call out my name but I don’t acknowledge any of
them. As soon as I reach the bar, I’m lifted off my feet and placed on top of it with a
mic thrust into my hand.
“I got a bet for you Brooke” Andrew calls into his mic but when he turns to me and
see’s the tears silently running down my cheeks he lowers the mic and looks at me
with concern. I loose it. I drop my mic, throw my arms around him and burying my
head into his chest I cry, great big howling sobs.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asks rubbing a soothing arms up and down my back.
I shake my head, still crying and not able to talk, even if I could I’m not sure what I
would say.
Some part of me knows that I’m completely overreacting and being irrational but a
bigger part of me just doesn’t care.
By the time Tucker has joined us on the bar and Andrew has passed me over to
him I’m hyperventilating.
“Brooke, what’s wrong?” Tucker’s concern just makes me cry harder.
I lift my head and he moves the hair out of my face, searching my eyes for the
answers that I can speak aloud.
“Can we get her a glass of water?” he asks someone over my shoulder.
I do a face plant into his chest and my crying starts all over again as I cling to his
shirt as if my life depends on it. He doesn’t question my tight grip, he just rubs his
hands up and down my arms and lets me hold onto him, absorbing some of his
strength.
Someone passes him a glass of water and he holds it to my mouth while I drink as
much of it as I can.
I look around and notice that everyone is watching me silently all with the same
expression, bafflement.
“Brooke, what’s wrong?” Tucker asks again.
I shake my head “Nothing” I offer a weak smile but I know it won’t fool him.
He pulls his head down so his forehead is resting on mine while he holds me close.
“I’m fat and I’m hungry, so hungry but I want spicy chicken and I can’t find any” I
whisper against his mouth, knowing that due to the complete silence of the club he
can hear me.
“You’re not fat and we’ll find you some chicken, now tell me what’s really bothering
you” he whispers back.
I step out of his arms and pull my dress behind my back so it’s tight on the front,
his eyes drop down to my stomach and then back up to mine before they drop down
again and the biggest grin known to man spreads across his face.
“Uh …Brooke?” Andrews confused voice comes from behind me.
I look around and a few people are staring opened mouthed at me, I feel the blood
rush to my face and I’m sure I’m the color of a tomato. “Oh … umm … yeah .. I’m
pregnant and having a little girl” I mutter, more embarrassed that people have seen
my bump than them seeing me cry over chicken.
Andrews eyes sweep over me slowly “Who …” he trails off.
“Me” Tucker announces proudly, wrapping an arm around me just below my
breasts.
“I’d congratulate you both but … I don’t want you to start crying again” he looks so
lost that I can’t help but smile and giggle a little.
“Maybe we should all get down?” Tucker asks amused.
Andrew looks at the crowd still watching us and nods while jumping down, Tucker
lifts me and places me into Andrews arms before he jumps down.
“I’m really happy for you” Andrew says quietly in my ear as I wrap my arms around
him.
“I’m terrified” I admit just as quietly back.
“You have nothing to worry about” he kissed my cheek and lets me go when
Tucker wraps an arm around me.
“You want me to go looking for the chicken or do you want to come with me?” he
asks, smirking at Andrews bemused expression.
“I’ll come with” I smile up at him.
 Tucker takes my arm to guide me out of the club but the DJ puts on Shawn
Desman’s Shook so I pull his arm and tug him to the dance floor, a few people move
out of the way, giving us a wide berth as we find a quiet area. Tucker wastes no time
pulling me against him but I turn my back to him and he moves his hands to my
bump as we move our hips to the beat, I cover his hands with my own and everything
around us melts away as I lean my head on his shoulder and get lost in those
beautiful blue eyes of his that I hope more than anything our baby girl inherits.
Someone takes a picture of us and before long it appears on the various screens
around the bar and on the walls surrounding us.
In these moments, I let the warmth and happiness that surrounds me, consume
me and I know that no matter what happens my baby will be loved and have a huge
family. I didn’t have a great family growing up and loosing my dad at such a young
age really affected me because I was a complete daddy’s girl. As strange and
unconventional as my life in the club has turned out. I know that each and every
person here has my back and will welcome my baby with open arms, no questions
asked, just like they did for me. Unlike me, she will never miss out on anything in life
and will be surrounded with everything and everyone that a person needs in their life
and I couldn’t be happier for that.
Well maybe, if I could have a cup of coffee, I’d be a little bit happier.
 Epilogue

“Uhh … Soph …”
Sophie lifts her head from the magazine she reading to look at me. Her and Matt
have been staying with us the last few weeks to help move Tucker into my house and
the men have been setting the baby’s bedroom up.
“Yeah?” she asks taking a sip of her drink and tucking her legs under her.
“Uh … can you get Tucker for me please?”
“Sure” She frowns at me and leave me alone in the living room.
My due date was a week ago and since last night I’ve been having pains, first they
started every few hours but they are every few minutes now and I’m actually starting
to panic because my ‘if I don’t think about it, it isn’t happening’ theory isn’t working
so well.
“You okay babe?” Tucker asks as he makes his way down the stairs.
“Uh ….” I pull the blanket off my lap and look down at the wet pool that’s under my
dress and on our cream leather sofa “Maybe?”
“What’s wrong?”
I wince as another pain flashes through me and grip the edge of the sofa.
Noticing my expression he wastes no time in rushing over to me and cupping my
face in his hands “Brooke!” his panicked voice calls out to me.
“My … pain … time …” I pant.
He searches my eyes looking for something and when I lift my dress to show him
the water all the color drains from his face and she starts panicking looking around
the room. I would laugh at him but I’m pretty sure I’m about ready to have my baby
and I don’t want to give birth on my sofa.
“Sophie!!!” he shouts out and murmurs apologies when I flinch away from his loud
voice.
“What’s wrong?” Sophie and Matt run into the room looking around for danger.
“Her waters have broke, she’s in pain. We have to do something!” he shouts at
them again.
“Why are you freaking out, Brooke seems fine” Matt asks his lips twitching with
amusement.
Sophie starts gathering up random things and telling us we need to get in the car
to the hospital but Tucker looks back at me.
I shrug at him and smile weakly “The pains started last night but now they are
coming faster and I think my water just broke so … I can have a coffee soon”

***
Seven weeks later.

Mia-Sophia Lloyd is the most beautiful little girl in the world. She has her dads
blazing blue eyes and even her cry is that of an angel. Giving birth wasn’t as bad as I
thought, it hurt like hell and I don’t think I’d do it again but I had been in labor for a
while before I went to hospital and basically didn’t have time to do anything except
push her out when we eventually got there. As soon as she was born we named her
Mia-Sophie, Mia after Tuckers mom and Sophia after Sophie because she helped me
through some of the most horrendous times in my life and was always there to help
me through everything. We were released from hospital the next day and Tucker
basically hasn’t taken his eyes off her since. I couldn’t have asked for anything better,
he attends to her every needs – to the point where we actually argue over who gets
to change her diapers – The amount of visitors we’ve had is surreal. Will brought his
wife and my half brother over to meet Mia and Jess and Andrew are a constant
presence at our house, Dave and Matt along with the rest of Heavens Devils have all
been to visit during a break from their tour and Tuckers band mates have basically
moved in and all dote on the little girl as if she is royalty. Matt and Sophie only stayed
for two weeks and then went back to their own lives to plan their wedding. Jess and
Lucy have been over, showering us all with gifts along with Zack and Chloe.
Basically we have an enormous family and we wouldn’t change a thing.
Tuckers parents are with us this week and have convinced us to go to the club –
none of us have been there since Mia’s birth and even though I need to check on
business, I’m not worried because I know Will would have taken care of everything
and I really don’t want to leave Mia for any amount of time. Tucker is even more
reluctant to leave her than I am but there is no arguing with Mr & Mrs Lloyd when
they want to spend the night with their first grandchild.
As soon as we enter the club a loud cheer erupts around us. Tucker is quickly
pulled to a table with his band mates and I once again find myself over Andrews
shoulder as he takes us to the bar.
To my surprise, he doesn’t stop at the bar he drops me to my feet outside the
office and leaves me there with a kiss on the cheek. I open my door to find Will
waiting for me behind his desk.
“Hey” I smile as I close the door behind me.
“Brooke… I have something for you”
I frown at the nervousness in his voice but he ignores it and stands from his desk,
when he reaches me he pulls me into a hug, drops and envelope in my hand and
leaves me alone in the office.
I look down at the envelope in my hand and turn it over to find it blank. All the hair
on my neck stands up but I walk slowly over to the sofa and pull out the letter inside.
Brooke,
My Baby Girl.
If you’re reading this letter it’s because you have your own baby now and I’m not
there to see it.
I’m so, sorry that I’m not in your life anymore but I can rest assured that you’ve
found Will and I can only hope that you’re happy.
There has never been anything more in the world that I love more than you, you’re
smile could light up a room and your laugh …. Your laugh is amazing, with your laugh
alone, I’m sure you could power a city from the pure beauty of it.
You’re a very special woman Brooke, you always have been. You’re kind and loving
and selfless and I know that you would have surrounded yourself with the same.
I also know that the man you have chosen to spend your life with is amazing and
just as much of a beautiful person as you, both inside and out. You would never settle
for less and I want you to know I approve, and am proud. Tell him I say, Hi,
congratulations and he better look after my baby girl or there will be trouble.
I know that now you have your own child you must understand how much a
parents love is unconditional.
I believe in you Brooke, I always have. I know that you have a tendency to worry
and not think you’re good enough but trust me to tell you that you can do this and
you are good enough.
That baby you’ve just given birth to is the luckiest living person on this earth
because you are his/her mother. It will grow up being loved by you which means that
it will grow up needing nothing and learning how to love just like you do.
You made me happy Brooke, always remember that.
I love you always,
I miss you always,
I’m watching over you always.
 Forever loved,
You’re daddy.
Xxxxx
P.S I want to meet the little one.

Tears drop down on the page as I read it and reread it over and over again. I have
no idea why my dad would have written me a letter but I’m just glad that he did.
When I first looked at Mia, I believed I had everything I ever wanted, but now,
knowing my dad believes in me enough to know I can do this, now I truly do have
everything.
I attempt to wait until the tears stop to go back out into the club but I know there’s
no way they are going to stop anytime soon so I fold the letter up and put it in my bag
before I push the office door open. I scan the bar looking for Will but there’s no sign
of him anywhere.
“Luce, where’s Will?”
Lucy turns to me with a bright smile but it fades when she see’s I’m crying “He left
why? Is everything okay?”
I don’t answer her instead I head over to the bands table.
“We’re going on a road trip tomorrow”
“We are?” Tucker looks up at me.
I nod at him and pass him the letter, as soon as he has it in his hands I’m lifted up
into the air and this time Andrew does stop at the bar and climbs on after me with
two microphones in his hand.
“How about we celebrate Brookes return?” He calls into his mic through his crowd.
I grin over at him “What did you have in mind?”
“Hmm” He rubs his chin and pretends to be in thought before a mischievous grin
takes over his face “How about … a little … bet?”

The End
 About the author
Hmm … about me … what to say?
I’ve always loved reading and writing, I can happily read two or three books a day –
as long as I have nothing else to do.
My love for writing started early, when all my friends where asking for dolls and other
toys, I was asking for pens, paper and then a typewriter.
I haven’t really figured out what I want to do in life yet so in the meantime, I write.
I’ve worked a number of different jobs and have an array of qualifications that I no
longer know what to do with or any way of using them.
My mind is complex and I’m sure there are some people who could spend an eternity
studying just my thought process alone.
I go through phases quicker than the weather changes. One week I might like
cowboys and country music, the next I’ll like bad boys and rock music.
If you want to contact me me, you can follow me on Twitter @**** or email me
*****@hotmail.co.uk or like my Facebook page.
It’s not easy to keep up with me but it’s always fun to try. There is never a boring
moment anyway.
Before you go, how about a sneak peek at my next book?
420 Hope – A sneak peek.

Chapter One
You two were forever
“Are you kidding me?” I’m aware that I’m shouting and people staring at us but I
no longer care.
“Lou let’s just leave it”
I turn my glare onto my best friend.
“Yeah listen to your fat friend” he sneers at her.
“Who the hell are you anyway?” I ask him giving him my best -you are shit on the
bottom of my shoe- look.
“Well aren’t you just the spoilt little rich one, shame daddy’s money couldn’t teach
you how to drive properly”
“No, but it taught me how to deal with assholes like you”
“Watch who you’re calling an asshole, bitch”
I watch as the woman takes a step towards me, she’s the same height as me,
maybe a few years older but looks as though she has definitely been in a fight before.
I haven’t.
“What, setting your dog on me?” I ask the man standing behind his woman “Can’t
solve things yourself?”
“Who are you calling a dog, bitch?” she asks taking another step closer so we are
nose to nose.
“You honey” I smile tauntingly at her.
“Louise...” Catherine says warning me to back down; she only ever uses my full
name when she’s nervous.
“Put a lease on your dog” The man advises her.
“I think I made a mistake” I say taking a step back from the woman in front of me
and shake my head “I shouldn’t have called you a dog”
“Yeah back down, bitch” the woman smirks.
Seriously where does she come up with this stuff?
“I was wrong to call you that, I’m pretty sure I just offended all dogs. I can’t group
someone as vile as you with that animal class. No you’re definitely more like
something that would block a toilet and as for your boyfriend over there, I’m not even
sure he constitutes as being called that”
The man steps in front of his woman so he’s now in my personal space, he’s a lot
taller than me so I have to look up to see him.
“Pay up” he says clearing his expression.
“You drove into me!” I shake my head at him.
“You weren’t looking where you were going” he starts poking me in the chest.
“Get your finger away from me before I break it” I advise looking pointedly at his
hand.
“Sure you would want to risk breaking a nail?”
I move my head to the side so I can see around him; the woman is watching us
looking proud.
“It’ll be worth it trust me” I smile at her.
“Is there a problem here?” I turn at the sound of another mans voice and look up
to see Travis assessing the situation.
“No problem, this man drove into me” I shrug at him.
 “No this spoilt little princess wasn’t watching where she was going and refuses to
pay for the damage on my car” The man in question insists pointing a finger at me.
“Spoilt?” Travis asks raising an eyebrow at me; I roll my eyes in answer.
“Yeah, she probably doesn’t want to part with the money that was for her
manicure or something” his girlfriend speaks up.
I start twirling a strand of hair around my finger and adopt my best airhead
impression, taking my voice a few octaves higher. “Well you see I was a bit worried
about that. I mean, I have a party tonight and I really do need another manicure, this
one just doesn’t match the dress that daddy bought me earlier” I let my eyes fill up
and a few tears fall down my cheeks “Daddy’s just going to be so upset with me if I
don’t look my best, what am I going to do?” I cry.
I hear Louise snort and Travis looks at me as if I’ve grown another head.
“See, I knew it!” the man shouts and points a finger at me again.
“Screw you asshole” I say back in my normal voice turning off the tears once again
“You drove in to me. I was stationary! You know what means? It means my car wasn’t
even fucking moving moron!”
The man takes a step towards me but Travis stands in front of him so the woman
comes to me instead.
“Trav? What’s going on?”
I freeze on the spot hearing that voice that I never thought I’d hear again. I don’t
take my eyes off the woman advancing on me, not needing to see him to confirm it. I
know that voice well enough that it is permanently engraved in my mind.
“Lou? Is that you?” he asks now he is close enough to see us all.
“Hey Kyle” I greet him still not taking my eyes off the woman.
“Princess called her own dogs in the end” the man notes.
“What?” Kyle asks him confused.
“He means me” I mutter still in shock at seeing him again. “What are you doing
here?” I ask and manage to say it without sounding mean.
“I moved back, what’s going on here?” I can see from the corner of my eye that
he’s looking at all of us. “Hey Cat, how’s things?”
“Uh …” she replies looking just as lost as me.
“They’ve had a car accident, both pointing the blame at the other” Travis explains.
“I was parked! He drove into me!” I scream beyond frustrated now.
“Hey, calm down princess, wouldn’t want you’re crown to slip” The man smirks at
me so I fully turn on him now and stomp over to him poking him in the chest like he
did to me earlier.
“Listen here, any more princess comments from you and I swear to god you will
feel these pointy shoes I’m wearing in places you wouldn’t even imagine you had
inside you because I will shove it so far up your ass that you will have a gap in the top
of your head. And princesses don’t wear crowns, they were tiaras!”
I have no idea why I add that last bit, but I feel the need to point it out.
“You would know bitch” he girlfriend notes so I turn on her.
“And you, I get it your some big bad girl from a rough neighbourhood but really,
calling me bitch every two seconds, it’s amusing not threatening. You sound like a
bad version of some girl gangster wanna be. Get over it and call me a bitch once
more and I really will show you how much of a bitch I can be”
“Please, you’re just about as real as your tits” she announces, her boyfriend
laughs.
“Babe, my breasts are real, unlike that diamond on your finger” I point my eyes at
her ring and her boyfriend turns bright read, cheap shot I know but I’m loosing it here
“I am not paying for something that you did, what about the damage on my car? I’ll
ignore it if you walk away now. I don’t want to hear from you ever again. But if your
drive your POS car into mine again, I’ll sue for destruction of property”
I hear them mutter things about bitches and princesses and daddy’s as they get in
their car and drive away. Cat lets out a big sigh.
“You okay?” I ask her not forgetting what he called her.
“Are you? I wasn’t the one he was shouting at and touching and I never almost got
attacked by his psycho girlfriend”
“He touched you?” both Travis and Kyle ask at the same time.
“Just before you came he was poking her” Cat tells them looking at me worriedly.
“I’m fine, honestly” I shrug and turn to Kyle.
My memory of him did not do him justice, from his jet black bed hair to his
silver/blue eyes that you can get lost in and that mouth that can make you loose your
panties if he turns his trademark slanted grin on you, he is still just as perfect as he
always was. My feelings for him are still present as well, if anything the time apart has
only made them stronger. He’s giving me the same attention with his eyes.
Amber walks over to us and wraps an arm around his waist. “What’s happening
baby?” she asks him then turns to me “Oh, hey Louise” she smiles.
I have to blink to break the connection between Kyle and me before I turn to smile
at her.
“Hi, how are you?” I ask getting my emotions in check.
“I’m good thanks, we’re going down to the beach” she smiles and Kyle wraps his
arm around her returning the hold. My eyes move down as they catch the
movement.
“You two know each other?” he asks looking down at Amber.
“We met a few days ago and got chatting” she smiles at me so I nod my
agreement.
“Well, we should get going” I turn to Cat and motion with my eyes that I’m
uncomfortable, she picks up on it and turns to the others.
“Thanks for coming over when you did Trav, it could have gotten ugly”
“It’s not a problem, try to stay out of trouble Lou” he smiles at me.
“Yeah me and my big mouth” I roll my eyes and jangle my keys “right well, I’ll see
you all around” I smile at everyone and walk back to my car.
“Did you know he was back?” Cat wastes no time talking before I’ve even started
the engine.
“Nope, I met Amber a few days ago in the library, she mentioned moving into town
with her fiancé but she didn’t offer a name and I didn’t ask her for one. He’s back for
good” I quickly fill her in on what I know.
“They’re engaged?” she asks stopping to clip her seatbelt on.
I look out my rear window and reverse out of the space I was in, offering a small
wave when we drive past Travis, Kyle and Amber. “Yeap, didn’t you see her ring?
That’s definitely not fake”
“How do you feel after seeing him again?” She asks watching me warily.
I let out a big breath “Honestly, I’m hoping that that bump we just had in the car
was a lot worse and right now I’m unconscious dreaming, none of this is real”
“Well he has Amber now and you’re happy with Chris. You two separated for a
reason” she pats my leg but I’m not sure if she’s doing it as a warning to stay away
from him or to reassure me that everything is going to be fine.
“I know” I nod at her but can’t do anything to stop the memories of how Kyle and I
used to be together from running through my mind.
“I wonder how Chris will take the news” she says mindlessly as we drive towards
her house.
 “He will be fine; he has nothing to worry about. Kyle and I have history that’s all, it’s
not like he doesn’t have any ex girlfriends around here” I say firmly.
“Yeah but you and Kyle were … everyone thought you two were forever” she sighs
not helping at all.
“Thanks Cat” I mutter.
“Right, sorry. You’re right, you have Chris and he’s engaged to Amber so obvious
he has his forever with someone else now” she says as if trying to convince me but I
think she might be trying to convince herself.
“Do you think I should tell Chris? Amber told me the other day that she’s going to
the party tonight so he will obviously be there as well, shall I tell him that I know he’s
back or just let him find out for himself tonight?” I ask worrying now.
“I don’t know, If you tell him before hand then he could think you’re making a big
deal out of it but if you leave it and then he finds out you saw him but didn’t mention
it that you have something to hide”
“I know why do I have a feeling this just got very complicated?” I ask the clouds
when we get out the car.
“Come on, don’t worry about that now. You’re not going to see Chris until you meet
him there so you have that excuse, but if he rings you mention it in passing when you
tell him about the bump in the car” I just nod my agreement and head into the house
to get ready for the party hoping it doesn’t cause any problems, I don’t need
anymore arguments right now.

As predicted Chris rings me an hour before the party.

“Hello” I answer smiling automatically.
“Hey, are you going to break every guys heart tonight or what?” he teases making
me laugh.
“I look presentable, I guess”
“Babe you could go in your pyjamas and still be the most beautiful woman in the
room”
“I had a bump in the car today” I sigh changing the subject and getting it over and
done with.
“Are you okay? Did you get hurt?” My heart squeezes at his concern.
“I’m fine, the guy was an asshole though, Travis came over and interrupted it
before he could set his girlfriend on me, it was close but then Kyle came over and it
got solved once the man was outnumbered” I hold my breath hoping that he picked
up on the way I casually dropped Kyle in there not drawing attention to them.
“Kyle’s back?” he asks quietly.
“Guess so, I met his fiancée a few days ago, didn’t know who she was engaged to
though” I shrug even though I know he can’t see the gesture.
“Should I be worried?” he asks making me frown.
“Of course not, they are very happy and so are we. The past is the past. I love you
and don’t want anyone else” I assure him.
I hear him let out the breath he was obviously holding “Okay good, I guess I’ll see
you in an hour then. Don’t be nervous about you’re speech, I know how you hate
public speaking”
“I know” I smile “I love you, see you soon”
“Love you too”
“Well that went well” I note once I’m sure he’s no longer on the line.
“It will be fine” Cat squeezes my hand in reassurance.
“Yeah” I nod, not sure if it will be anymore.