Nikita Wadhawan 1

Nikita has many different meanings in many different languages. Nikita is also pronounced

differently in every different language. But my mom told me it was a Russian name. In Russian

Nikita means victorious and unconquerable. My mom also told me that there was a Russian

queen named Nikita. In Indian culture my parents have to do this tradition where they have to go

to a temple to a priest and find out what should my name start with. So then the priest looks at

the day, the date and the time. Then tells my parents it should start with a letter “N”. My parents

were having a hard time finding a name for me. So my parents decide to take a look at the book

full of names that started with the letter “N” finally they decided to name me Nikita. They also

saw that Nikita was a very uncommon name. So that’s how my name came to be Nikita.

Indian culture is really hard to follow when you live in America. I think it’s hard to be an

Indian and American at the same time. I have to be both because if I forget my Indian culture my

parents get really mad and if I don’t be American I wouldn’t fit in like other people. But I think I

like being Indian knowing more or different languages than other Americans it makes me feel

special. My dad doesn’t allow me and my little brother to speak English at home because he

doesn’t want us to forget our language and I think that’s the right thing because I forgot how to

write Hindi and if I wouldn’t speak Hindi I might forget how to speak it too. My mom always

cooks Indian meals for our family so I and my little brother can know what an Indian meal is

like. Having a little Indian and American flavor in some of the things it makes them special well

that’s what I think not parents they don’t like it. In my family there is a tradition for many years

or maybe Indian tradition that we eat dinner really late and we have a very heavy dinner. But I

don’t really do that because I think eating late and having a heavy dinner makes you gain weight

so I really don’t follow that and my dad really doesn’t say anything because I have school the
 Nikita Wadhawan 2

next day so he doesn’t mind. But when weekends come he wants us to have our dinner with him

even if it’s light dinner.

Every year we do this tradition its called rakhi67yt0jhu8gd3evnjidqsxbhv. Rakhi is a

celebration for brothers. In rakhi I tie my little brother a thread made with beads on it and our

religious signs and in return he gives me money. Rakhi means a lot to me because that day I

appreciate for having a brother in my life and knowing that there is somebody else there for me

besides my parents. I also like putting henna it’s a temporary tattoo. We put henna when there is

a family wedding going on or if you are getting married. I love the smell of henna. Then we do

these fasting for a week twice a year. I think it’s really hard because we can’t eat any chicken or

meat and I love chicken so it makes it really hard. We just eat potatoes and I lose a lot of weight

during fasting I can’t eat that much potatoes. Basically Indian religion is really strict but I think if

it wasn’t strict I would have been such a bad girl. I think Indian religion made me for who I am

today and I’m proud of it.

The person who influenced was my therapist Melissa by showing me to be positive not all

the time but most of the time. She showed me in my life I’m going to have many options I just

got too held strong and not give up. Sometimes I feel like she gave me a new life. I remember

talking to her about conflicts that I was having with my mom and she always told me to go in her

shoes and see how I would feel what I would do. I’m not really a people person I don’t really get

along with people. But after what Melissa told me I try to go in anyone’s shoes and see how I

feel. She also gave me many hopes when I was going to the courts because I started giving up

everything even my life thinking that it was my fault. But Melissa always told me to keep telling

myself that nothing is my fault and that helped me a lot it got me stronger as time went on I was

also starting to face my problems. But now knowing Melissa I feel like helping people just like
 Nikita Wadhawan 3

she does so I started learning sign language so maybe in the future I can help some someone who

really needs it like the deaf people.

Another thing that influenced me was going to India this summer. I was starting to forget

my culture for not going to India for 8 years. My cousins and my family who live in India

influenced me by showing me what a Indian culture is when you get older. They showed me how

18 year old girls get engaged or arrange marriage. They showed how girls or women get treated

in India. Honestly I really don’t like how Indian guys treat the girls in India they think they can

rule over them they don’t really have respect for women in India. That’s why I would never get

married to a Indian guy. Girls in India don’t have freedom like we do in America. But they

showed me how a Indian wedding is like the Indian clothes. I love the Indian clothes they are so

traditional. What influenced me the most was the school life in India in India kids have to work

so hard and there is so much competition with the kids. Kid’s suicide if they don’t get the best

grade because people look down on them. So that’s when I started to compare India to America

and I saw so much difference in them. It’s like they are opposite of each other. India is like a

holy country and in America we don’t have time for god because we are so busy.

The day I came to America I was so nervous. I really didn’t know that much English. I was

embarrassed to ask anyone a question or a direction. I remember the first day of school it was

awful. I had a terrible day I couldn’t talk the teacher couldn’t understand me I had such a big

accent I was terrible. Everybody was looking at me. I thought everyone who was looking at me

was talking about me. I would try to understand but didn’t catch a thing. It was like I was trying

so hard but not succeeding. I would try to hide myself so nobody would look at me. But I felt

like all eyes were on me. Every laugh I heard I would cry inside saying why god why do you

have to put me through this situation. Even if someone would come by me I would get scared
 Nikita Wadhawan 4

what would say to me what do they think about me. I looked so different than everyone it looked

like I was from a different planet.

Then I got ESL it helped me so much I was starting to feel so good about myself. Now I

can speak well and understand and hopefully write well too. Having ESL had many benefits like

getting extra time for any test. Another benefit was that my ESL teacher would help me out on

any type of project or anything else that I need help with. But there was a special test for ESL it

was called the NYSLAT if you pass that you pass out of ESL and if you the state would score

you in which ESL level should you be in. In ESL there are three level beginners, intermediate

and advanced. This year I finally got out of ESL it feels really nice. But having ESL made a

better student in English I started getting comfortable with English because of ESL. IF I didn’t

have ESL I wouldn’t have gotten this far. So I thank ESL and all my ESL teachers who had me

for ESL.

One good quality I have is that I can cook. Whenever I cook everyone loves it. I’m into

spicy food a lot. So I make really spicy food. One of the foods that I make that everyone loves is

pasta. It’s like a cold salad. I put a lot of sauce and species in that pasta. I also put a lot of salads

into it. I think it’s different because I make it a little American and a little Indian flavor to it.

Whenever I make it for my neighbor or family they love it. Even though my neighbor is Irish she

loves having Indian food. She loves trying the food I make for her. I also make this special

dumpling for my dad every year when his birthday comes. The dumplings have a little Afghani

flavor to it. A lot of people tell me to make recipe book because they say I have a different

flavor. My dad always asks me to make Indian tea for me he says I make the best Indian tea ever

he never drinks tea from anybody else he says he doesn’t like at all. Everyone tells me I have a
 Nikita Wadhawan 5

different taste. They say I’m very unique at making different flavors. But sometimes cooking can

be hard because you have to chop so many things and it takes a lot of patience.

I think it’s a positive quality because I can help my mom cook. My mom takes my help

most of the time because she says I’m good at cooking. Whenever my mom is not home and I’m

taking care of my little brother I can make him whatever he wants to eat. I can take care of

myself in the future if my mom goes to India for vacation. I can at least take care of myself. Also

sometimes I feel like cooking a lot of food and give it to the people who need food who don’t

have enough money to get food. You never know maybe I can go somewhere with cooking by

mixing some Indian taste with American taste.

My first job was at my dad’s kiosks in the Broadway Mall I was about 13 years old. I use

to watch the kiosks and sell things like the stuff that you watch on TV and accessories for cell

phones. My dad he had two kiosks that I worked for. I use to work mostly on my summer

vacations or after school for couple of hours to help out my parents. I loved working there for

couple of months but after a while I started to get bored of it. Also sometimes I use to feel weird

when kids from my school use to come by to see me. It was also annoying because they would

ask me for discounts all the time it use make me feel that I’m being used. But over all I think my

experience was good because I use to interact with new people all the time. I would go to work

whenever I was home sick and working would cheer me up.

Working at mall also made me realize that maybe in the future I would like working at a

different mall just for a change. I always liked malls specially Roosevelt field mall because it so

big and smells really good. Also they have really nice stores in that mall. I don’t like being in

one mall for so long I like go to different malls. But next time when I do start working for
 Nikita Wadhawan 6

someone else I think it’s going to be harder because my dad didn’t say anything to me but

someone else wouldn’t really care to say something to me. I have this problem that I always end

up being late for work and if I do that for someone else they would fire. So in my experience I

need to learn to get to work on time

My first future goal is to graduate from Hicksville high school. Then I want to start going

to Nassau then transfer into St. Johns. I want to be a criminal lawyer. I really don’t plan to take

money from my parents for college but if I have then maybe. I want to everything independently.

In February I have to give my road test hopefully I past it. It feels like so much to do but so little

time. My dad wants me to get married after 18 but I feel like I have too much ahead of me.

Sometimes I just feel like going back to kindergarten because everything is going so fast. I don’t

why but sometimes I feel like parents have so many expectations that I always can’t fulfill. I

really don’t want to be selfish but now I feel like it’s time to do me but it’s hard to do that in my

culture. I just hope all the best to myself and all the dreams I have to accomplish.