When It Was Me

When It Was Me
by seeyara
Ongpauco Series #2
It started with a debate.

Bets were called.
Dares were issued.
It seemed harmless.
How did everything ended up with a heartbreak?
=================
i. Preface
When It Was Me
He's the guy who gets off with pissing the shit out of you.
He's the guy who doesn't back down to any challenge.
He's the guy that can make your panties drop.
He's also the guy who can make it in a twist.
She's the girl who doesn't hesitate to flip someone off.
She's the girl that can't resist any dare.
She's the girl who gives a fuck but rarely shows it.
She's also the girl everyone loved and hated.
He's the guy who brings out the best in her.
She's the girl who brings out the worst in him.
Louisse Salazar's and Cascade Ongpauco's story.
February 2015.
*Story Timeline: 2013 - 2015
=================
Chapter 1: Eat Shit
Chapter 1
Eat Shit
A year and a month ago...
"Salazar, sinco. Ongpauco, uno,"Atty. Broassaid as he scribbled on his seat plan. I

just stared at him, dumbfounded. And trying real hard not to embarrass myself from
reacting violently.
Putang ina. Did I really just fail that recitation slash debate?
I can hear the murmurs and I can also feel the stares of my blockmates. It makes me
more nauseous. It makes my head throb harder.
Pokerface. Show them it's nothing to you, L.
I slowly breathed in through my nose and exhaled through my mouth soundlessly. I

can't believe this is happening. I can't even. This is the very first time I failed
a recitation in International Law.
THE. VERY. FIRST. TIME.
Why now? Why now would I have the worst kind of hangover? Why now would I have the
mother of all hangovers?
It's official. I hate Patron, Smirnoff and Cuervo with passion. I also fucking
Spratlys Islands and every disputed island in the Southeast and South China Sea.
Gods. This is so embarrassing. To think I'm an International Studies student and I

came up short to that stupid jock?
"Class dismissed," Atty. Broas announced. I snapped out of my reverie.
My blockmates immediately scrambled out of the classroom. I took my time to gather

my things. I held my chin up and squared my shoulder before going out of the
classroom. Kaya mo 'to, L! Don't look
at anyone. Show them what happened didn't grate your ego.
I sighed in relief when I saw there's no one in the hallway. Thank the gods.
I was about to walk to my next class when I heard someone's footsteps following me.
"Salazar! Wait up!" someone shouted.
Oh. Hell. No.
I whipped my head so fast I thought I was gonna have a whiplash. "What?" I snapped
at Cascade Ongpauco's smirking ass face.
"Hey, don't be so rude now, Salazar," he said as he walked towards me. Despite my
irritation, I still cam't stop myself from admiring his facial features and his...
whole body. Damn. If only he's not a class-A asshole.
Honestly, he's not my type. He's not chinito. He's huge. And he's too damn cocky
for his own good. I hate it that I like him being tall, sporty and smart. Did I
mention he's the school's star quarterback?
"Like what you see?" he asked his smirk still in place. Good God. He had caught me
checking him out!
Running out of patience, I just raised an eyebrow. Can someone really be so

annoying? I wanna wipe that damn smirk off his face!
He shrugged, "Just wanna make sure there are no hard feelings between us." I just
stared at him. I know he's not done. I can tell that this asshole is about to drop
some serious shit on me. "I mean, I know what you feel. I've been there before...
Hang-over and not being prepared."
Wait. What? How come he knows I'm hangover?
"You probably haven't showered yet. Seeing that you're still in last night's
clothes," he said, his eyes roaming on my body.
I
stilled. What in the name of Tartarus?! "What're you talking about?" I asked,
confused. He's just making my hangover worse.
He leaned forward, his face only inches away from me. "Don't worry, Salazar. Your
secret is safe with me," he said as he put his index finger on his lips.
Fuck. He was at the The Ledge last night. He has seen me dancing at the tables,
pissed drunk.
I ripped my eyes away from his lips and stared at him coldly. "Eat shit, Ongpauco,"
I said before I turned my back on him and left.
Present Time...
I shook my head as I remember my first encounter with Cascade 'Kade' Ongpauco.

Gods. I hated him so much. How did I end up here? How did I end up crying over him
while he's probably banging his bimbo girlfriend?
I sniffed as I closed my eyes. I can feel my tears sliding down my temples and
going through my scalp. How can I be so stupid? Why am I the one who's crying? I
dumped him!
He made you dump him, L.
But that's beside the point. I still dumped him. I wanted this to happen. I wanted
him to stop. I wanted him to find someone who'd appreciate him. He deserved someone
worthy of his loyalty and love. I'm not that girl. I'm not the girl who's gonna
give him the trust and love that he deserves.
I have my own issue. I can't help him with his demons.
Even if he's an asshole most of the time, that guy still has a heart of gold that
only a few chosen people had ever seen.
And I was one of them.
And I have been replaced.
My gods. I laughed at myself. Who in their right mind falls in love with someone
they can't even stand half the damn time?
Apparently, me.
Apparently, the scared little girl fell for the asshole.
"L! Okay ka lang ba?" I ignored Kim's concerned voice and the sound of her knocking
on my door room. I just want to be alone.
Kim persisted. "Nandito lang ako ha?"
I nodded as I clutched my chest. Why can't I just come over to her room and pour
this shit I'm feeling? Why can't I just be that girl? The girl that doesn't have
trust issues, the girl that has her shit together... The girl who isn't as cynical
as I am.
I told him from the start that I'm hard to be with but he persisted. Look how it
ended badly. He even said I'm more trouble than my worth. Maybe he's right. Maybe
that's why he's give up on me, on us.
I cried harder when I heard his finals words inside my head.
"Dump me, Salazar! This is how it ends, you dumping me," he sneered at me. He was
so mad... so heartbroken. And I just stood there in front of him, pokerfacing like
a goddamned champ. "Go ahead! Dump me! You fucking don't want me. So just dump me,
Louisse."
So I did what I was told.
I dumped Kade Ongpauco.

=================
Chapter 2: New OTP
Chapter 2
New OTP
My best friends slash roomies were looking at like weird. I chose to ignore their
stares. I'm stressed as it is, not to mention I'm grumpy as fuck because of that
stupid jock.
Ugh. Block that thought, Louisse.
"Hindi ka na naman umuwi kagabi no?" Kim Talavera, one-third of our trio, asked as
she grabbed her bag on the sofa.
"Yup," I huffed, not offering information.
"San ka natulog?" Jamie Navarro, the youngest in our trio, piped in as she slumped
on the sofa, munching on her pandesal.
"Sa car ko," I grumbled. What's with the questions?
"Eew! Pumasok ka wearing your party clothes?" J asked, her face scrunching in
disgust. I glared at her. She made a face to irritate me more.
I just shook my head and grabbed my bag. "I gotta go! Baka ma-late pa ako!" I said
as I straightened my top. J and K both stood up. "Sabay kami!"
I just shrugged. Fine. I don't wanna talk anymore. I'm PMS-ing, hangover...
basically in a shitty mood and my friends won't stop bugging.
As we got outside of our apartment, I remembered the time when I first met these
two mofos. It was at the bookstore in our school. There was a screaming match
inside. Jamie was arguing with a girl about some book. She kept on spewing insults
about that 'vampire story with a Disney ending'. Turns out, the girl she was
arguing with was a huge fan of that book.
I can still remember every single word she said to that girl and what that girl
said to Jamie.
"Ate, ang pangit naman ng taste mo! Vampire na love triangle? Pinag-aagawan ng
dalawang gwapong bampira yung malanding babae? Wala namang redeeming qualities yung
babae! Magkapatid ang nag-away para lang sa kanya! Ew!" I was just standing three
feet away from them, watching.
"Mas malala naman yung gusto mo! Humahalik sa werewolf habang may karelasyong
vampire! What a cheater! Bitch!" The girl was fuming mad, you can tell even from a
far.
"Hindi siya cheater! Na-carried away lang siya at umamin naman siya sa boyfriend
niya! Pinatawad siya! Bat ka ba nangingialam ha?" Jamie countered.
"E pinangingialaman mo din yung gusto kong book!"
Jamie got in her face. "Pangit kasi yun!"
The girl was about to hit Jamie with the said book when suddenly a girl showed up,
it was Kim, her hands raised. "Wait lang!" she pointed at the bookshelves in front
of them. "Excuse me lang! Padaan po! Kukunin ko lan-"
"Tumabi ka sa harap ko! Sasamaan ka rin sakin tulad ng jologs na yan!" said girl
while pointing at Jamie. I have to say the girl was right. Jamie looked jologs that
time. She's wearing Crocs in school for God's sakes!
Kim shook her head. "Naku! Sorry po! Saglit lang po talaga! Aabutin ko lang po yung
boo-ahh!" she screamed when the girl raised her hand, about to throw the book at
Kim instead.
"Hey! Stop!" I shouted... just in time for the bookstore's manager to see us.
"You, four! Get out! Ginugulo niyo ang bookstore ko! Banned na kayo dito!"
I chuckled at the memory.
Jamie looked at me funny. "Weird mo. Badtrip ka kanina tapos bigla kang tumatawa
diyan." Nagsalita ang master of all weirdos.
I rolled my eyes. "I just remembered, almost two years ago na yung bookstore
incident." Both of them immediately pouted their lips.
"I can't believe tinotoo nung babae yung sinabi niya! Banned pa rin tayo sa
bookstore!" Jamie whined, muntik na nga siyang ma-fall sa stairs. Good thing Kim
grabbed her immediately.
"Graduate na nga ako, banned pa rin ako! Aabutin ko lang naman yung Passion &
Purity nun!" Kim mumbled, glaring at Jamie.
"And I was just gonna stop the fight lang! I was just standing there three fucking
feet away from them! And I'm banned?"
Jamie smiled innocently. "But if that didn't happened, hindi tayo magiging
roommates! Hindi tayo magiging best friends! Aangal pa?"
I rolled my eyes. "Whatever, Bella Swan."
Kim giggled.
We held hands as we cross the main road. Our apartment building was just in front
of our school. Isang tawid lang. No hassle.
I saw Jamie raised her hand, signaling the incoming car to stop. "Iron Man!" she
shouted and made an 'explosion sound.'
I facepalmed myself. What a dork.
***
I just got into my seat when a pair of long, toned legs caught my attention. I
looked up and saw the face of the owner of those legs. She's... she's pretty
talaga. Girl-crush material. Is there not a day
na hindi siya pretty? Even in her tennis uniform, she's still pretty.
Well, that's Asher Flores. Too damn pretty and too damn tough.
Really. Nakaka-insecure to be her seatmate.
She's so makinis. And those hooded brown eyes of hers? Those thick eyelashes? Wow.
To die for! Her eyebrow game is too damn strong too. If I didn't know any better,
I'd think she's a model not a tennis player.
The whole class was watching her every move and she was oblivious to the stares she
was getting. She was about to turn in our row when one of our bitch classmates
tripped her.
All of a sudden, Asher Flores showed her true colors.
"Pitumput pitong putang inang pating!" she shrieked.
Whoa there.
She squared her shoulders and straightened her tennis uniform. She looked back at
the girl who tripped her. "Anong problema mo ha?"
The bitch's eyes widened. "Nothing! It was just an accident!"
Asher got into her face. "Ulitin mo pa yun at babaliin ko lahat ng peke mong kuko."
She straightened up and went next to me.
"Assholes," I heard her mutter. She noticed me looking at her. "Tinitingin-tingin

mo dyan?" she asked with a scowl. And now I really like her even more. She's not
like them. She's not a stuck-up bitch. She's not pretentious. I want to be friends
with her. She's rare.
Instead of being intimidated with her scowl, I smiled at her. I was about to open
my mouth when I noticed someone took a seat at the other chair next to me.
"What's up? What did I miss?"
Kade asked as he straightened his legs in front of him.
"Why are you sitting there, Ongpauco?" I asked, annoyed. Just the mere sight of him
irritates the shit out of me.
"It's the only vacant seat, Salazar," he said with a wink. Holy mother of fuck.
I decided to turn my back on him before I wipe that smirk off his face.
"Jowa mo, teh?" Asher asked all of a sudden.
My eyes widened. "Good God, no!" I said in disgust. I heard Kade chuckled beside
me.
Asher laughed. "In fairness, bagay kayo." I was gonna argue but she interrupted me.
Ugh. "By the way, I'm Asher Flores. Ikaw?" she asked.
"Louisse Salazar," I said with a smile. "I don't know if I should be insulted that
you didn't know me while we're seatmates naman since day one of this class."
Asher laughed. "Sus teh, wag mong dibdibin. Wala ka namang dibdib," she said
jokingly. Pero ouch ha!
I heard Kade chuckled beside me... again. I glared at him and he just winked at me.
The nerve of this guy!
Why is he bugging me all of a sudden?! When will he stop?
"Good morning, class!" We both faced our professor in front. "Find your partners
for the whole term. Put your names in ¼ sheet of pad paper and pass it here," Prof
Lintag ordered as he sat down on his chair.
I looked at Asher. "Partner tayo?"
She scrunched her nose. "Sorry, girl. Hindi pwede e. Partner ko na yung best friend
ko," she said.
What? Oh, shit. No.
sighed. "May best friend ka dito?" I asked while looking around the room. May
umaway sa kanya earlier and nobody defended her? What a lame best friend. If it was
Jamie, I don't know what will happen to that bitch.
Asher nodded. "Yup! Since birth! Absent lang si Yap ngayon dahil sa away-game nila
sa Concordia College. Kawawa naman yun kapag walang kapartner next time na pumasok
siya. Sorry ha?"
I just nodded. I understand her. I would've done that if I were in her shoes. I
sighed as I looked around the room. Am I the only one who doesn't have a partner
pa?
Kade nudged me. I glared at him. "What?"

"Is Louisse Salazar your whole name?" he asked as he wrote something on a ¼ sheet
of paper. I nodded absentmindedly. Nope. Not gonna tell him my first name. No way.
I craned my neck and saw only his name on it.
Cascade Ongpauco
I watched his hand as he wrote again.
Louisse Salazar
PS4114-WAIT. WHAT?
He immediately stood up and went in front.
He did not just do what I think he did.
"Mukhang bet ka niya," I heard Asher snickered.
Fuck off, Flores.
***
Are we gonna study later?
I crumpled the paper and tried to focus on our Math professor. Kade passed another
paper. I sighed and read it again.
Starbucks Taft. 6PM?

I crumpled it again.
He passed another one.
You're failing this subject, Salazar. I'm your only chance to pass this subject.
I squeezed my eyes shut. Our professor just returned our exam papers earlier. I was
too slow kaya Kade saw my score. I fucking failed the prelim exam.
I opened my eyes and glared at him again. He smirked. "Is that a yes, Salazar?"
I continued glaring at him. He tilted his head to the side. "You showered and
changed clothes na pala," he said as his eyes raked my body. Perv!
I felt my cheeks and the tips of my ears heat up. "Stop looking at me like that,
you perv!"
"Like what?"
"Like I'm naked!" I hissed.
He only grinned before biting his lower lip. Holy tacos. Why does he have to be so
hot? I hate him! No! He's not hot!
"I'm gonna wait for you there. If you don't show up..." he trailed off.
"What?" I challenged.
He leaned closer. "You're gonna pay for it," he whispered. He then stood up and
walked away.
Shit. The class was dismissed na pala!

"Wow! Feeling ko kailangan kong magbabad sa shower after watching you and Kade!
Bakit ang hot niyo?" Asher asked as she fanned herself. "You guys are my new OTP!"
she squealed.
Ugh. I changed my mind. I soooo don't want to be friends with her!
=================
Chapter 3: Never
Chapter 3
Never
I'm two hours late. Damn! My fifteen-minute power nap turned into three-hour
slsumber. Ugh. Why do I love sleeping so much?
I ran as soon as I got outside of our apartment. Shit. Why am I running? If hindi
siya nakapaghintay, then that's too damn bad! It's not my fault that he's that
impatient. I slowed down and calmed myself.
Why am I nervous? Why is my heart trying to beat out of my chest? It's not like
this is a date.
My gods, L. Where's your pokerface? The resting-bitch face? You forgot na, L? Why
are you flustered when you're with him? He just looked at you like you're a food
kanina. No big deal.
Gosh. I hate this. I hate that guy.
I stopped when I saw him still inside Starbucks. He's not alone. He's with another
girl.
See, L? You're over-reacting. Look at him, he's a flirt. It's what he does. He
flirts with everyone. Not just you.
Damn. I let him slip in just a tiny bit. Okay, then. Armors up, Salazar.
I pushed the door open. Kade whipped his head, our eyes connected. I just stared at
him, face devoid of emotion.
"Took you long enough," he said when I got closer to them.
I look at his company and then to him. "You didn't seem to mind," I said as I
dragged the other chair. I sat on it and took my book and notes out of my bag.
"Jealous?" he asked with a smirk.
I just stared at him.
He grinned before looking back at his girl companion. "It was nice meeting
you," he said, dismissing her. I heard her sigh before she responded. I rolled my
eyes and continued on flipping the pages of my notes. Really? Baby talk? That
works?
"Hey, Salazar. Buy me a drink," he said before snatching my book and notes.
"What the hell?" I fumed and he just ignored me.
Fine. I stood up and went to the counter. Bahala siya. I'm gonna buy him an
Americano.
When I got back to our table, I placed the tray on it. I sat down and took my pen
and notes. "Shall we start?" I asked as I uncapped my pen. He didn't respond.
I looked at him to see what's going on. He's just staring at me, like he's trying
to figure me out. "What?" I asked calmly, fighting off the annoyance.
He placed his elbow on the table and his chin on his hand. He kept on staring at
me. It was unnerving. "You're awfully quiet, Salazar? What gives?" he asked.
"I'm always quiet," I answered immediately. Well, I'm not always quiet. I just
don't talk to people I don't like talking to.
"No, you're mad at something." I didn't answered. "Ahhh," he said, then I heard him
chuckling. I didn't look at him. What's his deal ba? Can't we just fucking study?
"You're mad at me."
I looked at him. "I'm not mad at you, okay? I just want to finish this shit so I
could go back to sleep," I snapped. Shit. So much for that pokerface.
He was about to talk back when a guy approached us. "Hi, good evening!" it was a
staff of Starbucks. I just looked at him. "That guy from the second to the last
table ordered this for you. Enjoy, miss." He placed the Coffee Jelly in
front of me before storming off.
"What the fuck?" I heard Kade growled. He stood up suddenly, bumping into the
table. I shrieked when I felt the cold splash on my chest and lap. I looked down
and saw my black tank top and pants were soaked.
"What the fuck, Ongpauco?" I growled at him. He was stunned.
"Shit, Salazar. I'm so sorry." Ha made me stand up as he gathered our things.

"Shit, sorry. I'm gonna fix this," he said before grabbing my hands and dragging me
out of Starbucks.
***
"No. No effing way!" I told him, stunned. There's no way in hell I'm gonna wear his
clothes! Is he out of his mind?
"C'mon! Just fucking change!" He grabbed my hands again and dragged me until we got
into his condo's bathroom. He pushed me inside then threw me his clean clothes. He
closed the door immediately. I tried to open it but it won't budge.
"I won't open this not until you change into my clothes," he said from outside. I
sighed. Fine. My clothes feelt so sticky na rin. I couldn't take it anymore. I took
of my clothes and wore his.
I knock on the door after I folded my drenched clothes. "Let me out," I said. He
opened it immediately.
He rubbed his chin as he watched me step out of his bathroom. Ano na naman? Ugh. Is
he gonna torment me again?
He smirked, like he knew something that I didn't. "Pizza?" he asked as he took his
phone from his pants.
I shrugged. But deep inside, I was like, 'YES OH MY GOD YES. PIZZA.'
"C'mon, let's take your clothes to the washers." He went to the backroom and I
followed him. Once I was in, I realized what his game was.
"Move away, you're too damn close!" I said while pushing him away. My drenched
clothes were pressed against his chest... his hard chest. Oh gods. His face was
just inches away from and his mouth is too close!
"You hate it when people get too close?" he asked, grinning. I growled and he just
chuckled.
"Move away! You're literally in my face!" I said, struggling to move him away from
me.
"Okay," he shrugged. He stepped back and took my clothes. He turned his back on me
and operated on his washing machine.
I took a step back and plastered myself against the wall. Damn. What was that?
I discreetly touched my chest. My heart's pounding way too fast and hard for my own
good. I shook my head and feelings away. Wala lang this. You just got nervous.
Damn, L. It's not like first time mo to be that close with a guy? Ang difference
lang with him is that you hate him. You hate him, right?
I composed myself before I got out of the backroom. I went to the living room and
sat down at the sofa. Safe here. Too many spaces. I can breathe here.
Minutes later, Kade immerged from the backroom when the doorbell alarmed us that
the pizzas were here. He bought two boxes of pizza! Meat lovers and Pepperoni. Yum!
"So, are you free tomorrow?" he asked as he took his first bite of his pepperoni
pizza.
I shook my head no. "I can't study with you tomorrow. I have plans." I took my
first bite of my meat lovers pizza. Oh gods.
"Okay. Where are you going, then?" he asked as he chewed.
I look at him in disgust. "Why? Are you gonna follow me at The Ledge?"
He chuckled. "Why not? I've got nothing to do," he said, his eyes playful.
I rolled my eyes. "We see each other every day, Ongpauco. Aren't you sick of my
face already?" I asked in disbelief. I mean, the teasing gets old na. Can he just
stop annoying the shit out of me?
His face got serious. He bit his lower lip before shaking his head. "Never."
My stomach dropped.
And my jaw.
Oh. Shit.
=================
Chapter 4: Scared?
Chapter 4
Scared?
I rolled over my bed and stared at my bedroom ceiling. I frowned when the first
image that popped into my head was my annoying study-buddy. I shook my head to
clear my mind.
It didn't work, though. He's still on my mind.
I sat up and rubbed my face with both hands. What the hell is going on with me?
Seriously? After spilling my coffee jelly on me last night, I should be turned off
na with him. I shouldn't get any ideas din just because he walked me home.
Ugh. L, you're over-thinking again. It's unhealthy. Get over it. Get over him.
I heard my phone pinged. I crawled over my bed and reached for it on my bedside
table. I opened it and read a text from an unregistered number.
From: +6391633969**
Yo.
I frowned. Who could this be? I deleted the text. If it's important, the text
sender will call or text again. I slumped back on the bed then checked my social
media accounts.
Kimberly Joy Talavera is listening to The Script.
Feels. Huhuhu.
Jamie Serafina Navarro is watching Thor.
Gosh! Ang hot talaga ni Thor!
I chuckled at my friends' Facebook posts. After checking my notifications and

ignoring the overflowing messages on my inbox, I went to
Instagram naman. I was just about to check my notifications when a text appeared.
It's from the unregistered number again.
From: +6391633969**
Ignoring me, Salazar?
I dropped my phone and it went straight to my face. Ugh! That hurt!
I sat up and read the text again. How did he get my number?
I programmed his name on my phone before I replied.
How did you get my number?
From: Cascade Ongpauco
Sources.
I didn't reply. If he doesn't want to tell me who gave him my number, then so be
it. I won't bug him. I won't give him the satisfaction.
I jumped out of bed and made my way to the bathroom. It's already 9AM. I need to
get up and prepare for my afternoon classes. I sighed in relief when I realized
that I won't be having any classes with Kade today.
My phone pinged again.

See you later, Salazar.
Oh, fuck. Will he be at The Ledge later?
Stalker. I replied.
***
"Hoy, bakla. Nasaan yung bodyguard mo?" Asher asked when she took the seat beside
me.
I rolled my eyes. "I don't have a bodyguard," I answered lamely.
She fake a gasp. "Boyfriend?"
"Nope."
"Could've fooled me," she teased. "Oy, party girl.
Pupunta ka sa The Ledge mamaya?" she asked as she fished for her things on her bag.
I nodded. "Yup. I can't miss it. It's organized by our org e."
Asher smiled. "Good! Mapapakilala ko sa'yo yung malandi kong best friend. Kasama ko
siya mamaya." Oh. So I'll get to meet her best friend later? What does she look
like kaya? Is she Asher's opposite or are they the same?
Gods. Just the thought of seeing two Asher Flores makes me wince. Being with them
would be like participating in a riot.
"Okaaaay," I answered.
"Hmm... Ang tamlay mo naman today!" Asher huffed. I wanna tell her na she's just
too damn energetic but I kept my mouth shut. I saw her roll her eyes. "Palibhasa
kasi wala yung Vitamins C mo e."
Again, I kept my mouth shut.
She leaned closer to me. "Na-gets mo ba ako? Vitamin C? As in Vitamin Cascade? GIRL
PANSININ MO KO!" she whined in my ear.
I moved away from her. "Ano ba, Asher? Ang kulit mo!" I pushed her face away from
me.
Asher chuckled. "Yay! Nagtagalog din siya!" she clapped her hands. "Kayo talagang
mga conyotic people! Para kayong may singaw pagnagsasalita ng tagalog!"
Instead of being insulted, I burst into laughter. "You're so weird!" I told her
while wiping the tears away from my face. I wonder, paano if she meets Jamie pa?
Super weird nun. And fun!
"Ganyan talaga. Babaeng bakla e," she said after flipping her hair. I just shook my
head. I imagined being with her later at The Ledge. Oh gods. Riot talaga.
***
I hate EDM. I hate it so much. It's just too damn loud and senseless.
But I just tolerate it. I won't enjoy every single party I go to if I sulk at the
corner because of the music, right?
I sighed. Just the sight of the gyrating bodies makes me wanna go home. I'm gonna
need a three-day hibernation after this party.
I jumped when someone grabbed my arm and jerked it. I looked at the person. "Bakla
ka! Bakit late ka?" I heard Asher shouted despite the loud music.
"Sorry! Traffic e!" I shouted back. I took her in and found myself smiling. She's
so simple but lakas pa rin ng dating niya.
"Oh! By the way! Ito pala si Yap! Best friend ko!" she said pointing at the guy
behind her.
Wait. What? "Yap is a guy?" I asked, confused.
Asher chuckled and nodded. "Wait, akala mo girl best friend ko? Hindi ko ba
nasabi?" she asked. I shook my head.
I looked at Yap and smiled at him. "Hi, I'm Louisse!" I said.
He wrapped his arm around Asher's shoulder then offered his free hand to me.
Hmmm... Fishy. "I'm Yap."
"Is Yap your surname?" He nodded. "What's your first name?" I asked.
He grinned. "I'm just Yap."
I shrugged. Okay. Fair enough. I understand. I don't like telling people my whole
name too.
"Oh!" Asher said. "Kailangan ko mag-CR! Yappie, samahan mo ko!" she said while
looking someone from my back. I watched her drag Yap away from me.
That's weird. She'll go to the bathroom with her guy best friend?
I just shook my head. Asher is too unpredictable. She's
my friend now, I need to get used to it.
"Salazar," I jumped when I felt his breath at the back of my neck. Damn, why did
wore my hair up?
I whirled around and saw Kade's knowing smirk. Damn. Why is he so damn hot? His
facial features were sharper in the dark. His hooded eyes twinkled with mischief.
Oh gods. That half-smile, half-smirk will be the death of me.
He leaned closer until his breath fanned my ear, "Like what you see, Salazar?" he
asked.
Busted.
I bit my lower lip and fought the urge to shiver. I pushed him away. "Get out of my
face, Ongpauco."
Instead of moving away, Kade wrapped his arm around my waist. "I saved you a
dance," he said with a grin. I tried to move away from him. "Scared?" he smirked. I
want to wipe that smirk off his face!
He did not just issue a challenge.
I stopped squirming. "No," I said as I put my hands on his shoulder.
"C'mon on now. Wrap your arms around my neck," he said, still smirking.
I did. Damn. He's too tall!
I gasped when he suddenly pulled me close to him. Our bodies were touching. My
insides are turning into mush and my knees are about to unbuckle. I looked up at
his face. We stared at each other as we started to dance. I raised my hands in the
air and closed my eyes. I let my body dance into the beat of the music. Kade's
hands never strayed for my waist
even though I turned my back on him.
Chill lang, L. You're just dancing with him. No big deal.
I felt his body move against my back. Everything in me just clenched. Everything.
My whole body is tingling from his touch and my face is too hot. It was a weird
feeling. But it wasn't bad.
In fact, I am enjoying it.
I opened my eyes when his hands squeezed my waist. I whirled around. His lips got
my attention when I saw his tongue wet his lips.
Oh. Gods.
"CASCADE!!!"
And just like that, the moment was ruined.

"Kade! You're just here lang pala!" said by the drunk guy. I moved away from Kade
and I staggered. Fuck. My heart's racing and I'm sweating like a pig.
Kade immediately catches me. It didn't help my racing heart. I squirmed out of his
grasp and moved away again.
I need to breathe! I might pass out because of that freaking dance!
I looked at Kade, he was scratching the back of his head. "What the fuck? You're
smashed already, Lake?" he asked the guy in disbelief. He shook his head.
"Oh! Sorry! You're with her pala!" 'Lake' said when he saw me. I just nodded at
him. "I'm Lake Ongpauco! I'm his cousin! You're Louisse diba?"
I nodded. "Yup, that's me," I said. I moved away from them. "Anyway, I gotta go! I
need to find Asher!" I said before storming off.
"Hey! You need to introduce her to River, too!" I heard Lake slurred.
"Fuck off, Lake!" Lake growled. "Wait! Salazar!" I heard Kade's voice but I ignored
it. I continued to walk away from him until I got outside of The Ledge.
Fuck! What were you thinking, L? You're playing fire with fire! He's too dangerous!
I need to stay away from him. I'm barely passing my subjects and I don't need any
distractions. I need to graduate on time and I need to do it unscathed.
=================
Chapter 5: Fair and Square
Chapter 5
Fair and Square
A year ago...
It has been a week since I decided to avoid Kade. I learned that it's hard to
ignore someone who is hell bent on making you acknowledge them. It was so hard to
ignore him! He kept on passing notes when we're in class. It also didn't help that
Asher is helping him!
One of the reasons din why I'm avoiding him is the mere fact that I danced with him
last week at The Ledge! With a sexy song no less! I can't dance for shit. I'm sure
I looked so stupid that moment. Nakakahiya. Super nakakahiya! And the fact that I
can't chuck it all up to being young and drunk is not good. He totally had me
there.
Gods, what if someone who knew me saw us? I don't wanna be referred to as one of
his 'groupies.' I mean, yuck.
"Oh, shit," Asher muttered. Shit. I got lost in my thought na naman. I missed what
Prof Broas said.
"What?" I asked her.
Asher scratched her forehead. "Nire-require tayo magkaroon ng copy nung book ni
Miriam Defensor-Santiago," she said, pouting. After being friends with her, Asher
made it a point to always sit beside me every class we have.
"I heard there are limited copies at the library," said Kade. I didn't acknowledge
him.
"Punta tayong library later?" I asked Asher. I noticed her looking at Kade then to
me. I felt the hairs on my nape stood up as I watched the shit-eating grin form on
Asher's lips.
"Naalala ko! Meron pala si Yap nun. Hihiramin ko na lang yung sa kanya," she then
looked at Kade. "Tapos
ikaw pogi, samahan mo yung alaga mo sa library. Huwag mong papatakasin ha?"
My jaw dropped at her audacity. What the heck, Asher? And did she just wiggle her
brows?
Kade chuckled. "No problem."
I glared at Asher. "I don't need a chaperon." I turned my focus in front again.
I sighed and took my phone out when I noticed our prof was just checking our
quizzes. I put my phone down on my desk and fished for my earphones on my bag.
"Good God, Salazar. You're a 1D fan?" I heard Kade asked, his tone disgusted.
My head snapped up. "And so?" I asked, chin up. Fuck. Pinansin ko siya!
He smirked. "Never pegged you as a fangirl."
I averted my eyes from him. Armors up, Salazar. Ignore the asshole. I put my
earphones and maximized the volume.
Minutes later, Kade slipped a piece of paper on my desk. I took it without looking
at him.
Salazar's New Playlist
Chasing Cars - Snow Patrol
Demons - Imagine Dragons
For The First Time - The Script
Kiss Me - Ed Sheeran
It's Time - Imagine Dragons
Charlie Boy - The Lumineers
She
Will Be Loved - Maroon 5
Ho Hey - The Lumineers
The Scientist - Coldplay
Dare You To Move - Switchfoot
Feel Again - One Republic
Son's Gonna Rise - Citizen Cope

Oh my gods. Did he just... Fuck. He made me a playlist?
I read the songs listed on the piece of paper over and over again. These are my
favorite songs! How did he come up with this playlist? Are they his favorites too?
Wait! It doesn't matter! I have these songs on my phone already.
I looked at him and I caught him staring at me. He leaned forward and pulled the
earphone out of my right ear. "Listen to those songs instead of the crap you're
listening to," he said with a wink. He stood up and went to a different seat.
I felt my heart slammed against my chest hard. Damn. That guy talaga.
"Wow. Sweet naman ni bodyguard!" I jumped when I saw Asher's face near me. She's
reading the songs with a shit-eating grin. Again.
Gaaah. It's like she knew something that I didn't! I hate that feeling.
Asher looked at me with a teasing glint in her eyes. "So saan diyan ang theme song
niyo?" she teased.
I shoved her face away with my free hand. "Fuck off, Flores." Asher just giggled.
I put on my earphone again and searched for Chasing Cars.
***
From: Asher Flores
Beks, isa na lang daw natitirang book ni Mareng Miriam.
Shit! I totally forgot about the book!
I immediately stood up from my seat and gathered up my things. Why did I even
thought studying here at the garden? Why not at the library na lang? Edi sana I got
the book on an earlier time.
When I got to the library, I immediately went to the closest computer after putting
my bag on an empty table. After jotting down the information I needed, I breezed
through the Circulations area. When I rounded the corner, I spotted the book right
away. Relief coursed through me. I got the last book!
I did a mental fist pump in my head.
International Relations: A College Textbook
When I snatched the book from the bookshelves, a hand stopped me by pulling the
book away from me. I looked up and saw Kade. "Not so fast," he said with a smug
smile.
Fuck. Pati ba naman dito?
"Get your hands off my book," I snapped.
"Not gonna happen," he answered smugly.

"I got it first!" I sneered.
"Nope."
I glared at him. "Let it go, Ongpauco!" I tugged it but he his hold wouldn't budge.
"I got it first you, dumbfuck. Huwag kang madaya!" Oops. There goes my filter.
Kade just chuckled. Gaaah. I took his bait! "Can you not for once be an asshole?
Please?" I asked, trying to sound nice. Sit. I just called him an asshole.
He shrugged. "Nah. I need it as much as you need it."
He's wrong! He's a freaking Latin honors candidate and I'm barely passing my
subjects! I need it more.
"I need it more than you do." I just had a failing grade last week because of him!
For God's sakes, uno siya on the recitation! And now he wouldn't even cut me some
slack!
"Fine. Let's do Rock-Paper-Scissors," he suggested. What are we, kids?
I shook my head no. "I know you'll split the moment I let this book go," I said,
looking at the book we're both holding.
His grin went wide. "You know me so well already, Salazar." My stomach dipped at
the sight of his boyish grin. I bet girls threw themselves at him with just one
smile.
I squinted. "It doesn't take a genius to know what you are, asshole."
Kade ignored my jab and looked like he's amused at me. What the hell?
"Thumb-wrestling. We can do it with just one hand," Kade suddenly said.

"Nope. Not taking any chances," I said, shaking my head. I know for a fact din na I
would get lost if we do the thumb-wrestling. Just look at his hands! They're too
big!
"Coin toss?"
I rolled my eyes at him. "I'm not risking my grade over a coin toss, Ongpauco."
Kade sighed, frustrated at me. If he would just let go, we might've been done
kanina pa. "I can't think of anything else. Let's just do a Rock-Papers-Scissors."
I was about to shake my head when an idea popped into my head. "How about a staring
contest? First one to blink or look away, loses. No hands need, just our eyes."
"Okay. But we need to set rules. We can distract each other but we can't touch each
other. No blowing. No pulling funny faces, that kind of shit. You good with that?"
I smiled. One thing Kade doesn't know about me is that I'm good with loopholes. And
I'm gonna use it with him. He wouldn't know what hit him.
"Yeah. So, let's start?" I asked. He nodded and I stepped closer to him. The book
was squished between us, our hands still holding it.
"Ready?" he asked. I nodded. "One, two, three!"
And we stared at each others' eyes for a minute. I watch his eyes close and noticed
the pupils of his eyes were dilated. And the heat in his eyes? I might combust any
minute.
Snap out of it, L! You have a plan. You can't execute your plan if you blinked
already! Do it while your eyes are still not dry. Remember the loophole? He didn't
say that I can't use my lips to distract him. It wasn't on his rules. I need to do
it before he realizes what I'm planning to do.
Gods. I don't know what I'll do if I fail this subject pa ha. I can feel my hearts
beating too damn fast now, my stomach fluttering and my hands are getting clammy.
Damn it! I'm just gonna do it!
I stand on my tip toes and leaned closer to him until our lips met. Kade blinked
and his hold on my book loosened. I snatched it immediately.
I smirked at him. "I won. Fair and square." I turned my back on him and ran towards
the librarian's desk and checked out the book.
I just got out of the library when I heard my phone pinged. I pulled it out and
read the text I just received.
You and I both know I got the bigger prize.
=================
Chapter 6: Tea Party
Chapter 6
Tea Party
A year ago...
Yes, I kissed him. No big deal.
Fuck. Big deal yun.I do have a party girl image but I don't just kiss anyone. I
have standards and they're too damn high. It's his entire fault. I just did what I
had to do for my grades.
How will I face him later when he gets here?
I jumped when Asher slapped my shoulder. "Oy, bakla! Bakit namumutla ka diyan? Okay
ka lang?" she asked, concerned.
I shrugged. "Yeah. I'm okay."
She didn't look convinced. "Sure ka? Parang hihimatayin yung hitsura mo." Do I look
that bad? Gods. I need to get a grip. Kade doesn't need to see me nervous.
I forced a smile. "I'm okay nga."
She still looked dubious. "Sabi mo e." She pointed at the book on my desk. It was
the book Kade and I fought over with. "Anyway, buti nakuha mo yung last book dun sa
library. Sinamahan ka ba ni Kade?"
I got caught off-guard by her question. I choked and coughed badly. "Huy!
Seriously! Okay ka lang?" she asked as she pat my back.
"What's up, girls?" I jumped when Kade suddenly took a seat beside me. Asher didn't
notice my reaction when she greeted him back. I avoided his eyes and looked to his
opposite direction.
I felt him before I heard him. "Hey there, sweet lips."

Holy Tacos! Does he really have to say that in front of Asher?
I heard her gasp. I looked at her and saw her eyes
were wide and her mouth formed into O. "Sweet lips-what? Tama ba ang naiisip ko?"
she asked.
I didn't answer.
Asher squealed as she clapped her hands. "OMG. Hindi ko na kailangan ng sagot
galing sa inyo. Hitsura niyo palang dalawa, alam ko na!"
I groaned. "It's not like that!" I argued before I stared daggers at Kade. "Really?
Sweet lips? Our lips just touched!" it's impossible na he tasted my lips!
His face lit up. "You just admitted that you cheated. No touching, right?"
Goodness, that half-smile half-smirk.
"My ship is sailing!" Asher squealed again.
"Shut up, Flores!" I growled at her.
When I looked back at him, Kade leaned close. "I won, Salazar. You kissed me and I
still got a book from the library," he said with a low voice. I fought the urge to
shiver badly.
"How did you get one?"
"Sources, sweet lips," he said, his eyes twinkling with mischief.
I squinted at pointed a finger at him. "Stop calling me that! It wasn't even a

kiss! There were no tongues involved."
His smirk turned into a huge boyish grin. Oh lord. Why does he have to be so damn
hot? "We can do a do-over if you want to."
"Paki-reenact naman para sa number one shipper niyo. Please." I looked back and saw
Asher grinning at us like a fool.She's so kilig na kilig. Ano kami, TV series?
"No. Never again," I told them before I clenched my jaw. Patience, L. Patience.
"Scared, Salazar?" he teased. That won't work anymore, Ongpauco.
"More like traumatized,"
I mumbled.
"Arte naman nito! If I know kilig na kilig ka diyan!" Asher piped in.
I ignored them and put on my earphones and programmed it into full-blast.
"Oops. Napikon ata," I saw her mouthed at Kade. He just chuckled.
Fuckers.
Minutes later, I received a note from Kade.
It's been a week since we studied. You up for tonight?

NO. I replied.
Another note slipped into my desk again.
Long test tomorrow, Salazar.
Shit! I totally forgot about that!
Fine.
His last note was,
We'll study in my condo. Just knock when you get there.
***
Shit. I'm running late again. When will I be on time? I just hope Kade won't rub it
in my face later.
When I got into his condo's floor, I immediately ran towards his door and knocked.
The door immediately opened and there was no one in the doorway.
Holy tacos! May mumu ba sa condo ni Kade?
"Hi!" I jumped when I heard a little girl's voice. I looked down and saw a little
girl wearing a tiara and pink ruffled princess gown.
I blinked twice at her. "Uhm, hi?" Did I knock on the wrong door? I looked at the
room number on the door. 1217. I'm right naman. Wait. Did I entered the wrong
building?
I looked down at the little girl when she tugged the hem of my shirt.
"Aw you Ahia'sh giwfwend?" Uh. What? Who the hell is Ahia?
"Ozi! Why did you open the door! Ahia will get mad!" Another little girl appeared
and she looked at me with reluctance. It looked like she's at least a year older
with 'Ozi.'
The little girl in front of me jumped and squealed. She reminded me of Asher.
"Sachi! Look! She'sh Ahia'sh giwfwend!"
'Sachi's' eyes widened. "Oh! Hi po!" she waved at me. Hala! I'm nobody's
girlfriend!
I heard another set of footsteps coming. "Sachi! Shobe! I told you not to open the
do-oh shit." The guy stopped in his tracks when our eyes met.
"That's a bad word, Ahia!" 'Sachi' gasped.

I recovered immediately from the shock. "KADE?!" I asked before I doubled over
laughing. Holy shit! I cannot believe what I just saw!
The DLU Gray Wolves' Football Quarterback is wearing a fucking pink fairy wings!
Kade's face turned into a scowl. "Come in and close the fuc-freaking door,
Salazar!" he yelled. I covered my mouth just in time for my snort to come out. I
went inside his condo and closed the door.
Kade walked towards me as I tried my hardest not to laugh at his appearance. "Why
are you wearing that shi-mph." He interrupted me by covering my mouth with his
hand.
"Little ears," he hissed. I removed his hand away and waved my hand at his body.
"Seriously? Pink fairy wings? Pink wig? Pink laced wand?" I asked and then laughed
after. He's so macho and manly in the university but now... he looked ridiculous!
But gosh, I hate to admit it but
the realization of him doing this for his little sisters makes me warm and fuzzy.
"Is she yow giwfwend, Ahia?" I snapped out of my trance when Ozi interrupted.
Kade looked down at her. He was grinning at her too. "No, shobe. She's my
classmate."
"But you're bagay!" Sachi pipped in.
Kade chuckled. "No, Sachi. I'm too pogi for her."
"Wow ha! Nakakahiya naman sa'yo!" I rolled my eyes. So fucking cocky.
"Anyway, these two are my little sisters." He messed with both their hairs. "This
one's Bay, she's 6. And this one's Ocean, the youngest." Oh, her name's Bay pala.
The Ongpauco clan must be obsessed with water. Cascade, Bay, Ocean, Lake and River.
I waved at them. "Hi, Ocean, Bay! I'm Louisse."
They both waved back with a smiled. "Can you play with us po?" Bay asked.
I nodded. "Sure!"
"Pewo she doesn't have a coshchume!" Ocean said with a pout.
I looked around Kade's living room and saw the blue fur blanket and the jar of
cookies on the table. "I have na," I said as I went over the couch. I covered
myself with the blue fur blanket and took the jar of cookies.
I turned around."Rawr! I'm Cookie Monster!" I growled, imitating Cookie Monster's

voice.
Ocean giggled while Bay clapped. "Yay! We have another guest for our tea party!"
***
"Oh, girls! I have an idea!" I said after taking a fake sip on their toy teacups.
The three of them looked at me. "Are you both fans of One Direction?" I asked while
grinning. Please, say yes!
Both girls squealed and nodded. Kade groaned. "I have a bad feeling about this."
"Let's make a music video!" I stood up and clapped my hands.
"YES! Let's do Live While We're Young!" Bay squealed again.
Kade shook his head and wrapped his arms in front of his chest. "NO." Oh gods,
those biceps.
L, FOCUS! THIS IS YOUR REVENGE! He insulted One Direction yesterday and you can
avenge them now!
"What! No! Don't be like that, Ahia!" Bay pouted and I'm sure she's ready to cry
fake tears.
I squinted down at him. "Tsk, tsk. Are you gonna make them cry pa?"
Kade shook his head. "Fuc-Fine!" he said, his tone resigned.
I grinned at him. This is the perfect revenge for a One Direction hater. Make him
sing a 1D song while in a pink fairy costume and record it on camera!
"Can we do Best Song Ever?" Bay requested as she stood up.
I nodded. "Kiss You too!"
"How about me kissing you instead?" I heard Kade grumbled as he stood up and carry
Ocean in his arms.
"Fuck you," I mouthed to him with a sweet smile.

Bay and I helped each other set up their sound system and my phone on the coffee
table. We didn't waste time and we immediately made a music video. Mahirap na, Kade
might change his mind!
"Lez go cwazy, cwazy, cwazy 'til we see the sun!" Ocean sang as she jumped on the
couch.
"I know we only met but let's pretend it's love," Bay flailed her arms.
"And never, never, never stop for anyone," I sang while pointing at Kade, the big
brother kill-joy.
Kade rolled his eyes before wrapping his left arm on my neck and put me into
chokehold. "Tonight let's get some and live while we're young!" he sang.
***
Both Kade and I slumped on the couch. We just finished tucking in his little
sisters in his guest room.I didn't expect that babysitting and having a kiddie tea
party would be exhausting and at the same time, fun.
Kade sighed as he took off his pink wig."I'm sorry about that, Salazar. Instead of
studying, you ended up babysitting my sisters with me."
I shook my head. "That's okay. I had fun naman with our tea party," I said,
chuckling.
Kade rubbed his stomach. "I think I've eaten cookies to last a lifetime. Yet I'm
fucking hungry." He looked at me as he reached for his phone on the center table.
"Pizza?"
I shook my head. "I'm gonna head out na," I said, about to stand up.
Kade stopped me and pulled me down. "It's late already. Stay the night here. We
could study pa for our long test tomorrow."
Fuck. I forgot about it na naman. He's right. We could still study pa. I really
wanted to pass my math subject. I don't want to be a summer grad. I wanna graduate
on time with my batchmates.
But goodbye, sleep. I sighed. "Fine. Sure."
"Wait. I'll order pizza." Ahh, a man after my heart. Wait, what? No.
"Do you always babysit for your parents?" I asked him after he finished talking on
the phone.
He shrugged. "Yup. I'm the only one who has time for them." Awww. Shit. Bakit ang
sweet niya?
I smiled at him. Those little girls are so lucky. "I can see you really love your
siblings. They're lucky to have you. I'm an only child, so sometimes I envy those
who have older brothers."
Kade smiled. "Thanks." I noticed his cheeks and the tips of his ears reddened. I
refuse to believe he's not used to compliments.
"Aww. Are you blushing, Ongpauco?" I teased him with a smirk.

He scowled at me. "No, I'm not."
"Yes, you are," I sing-songed.
"Nope."
"Ye-" I gasped. Kade's face was just inches away from me.
Holy crap.
"Who's blushing now?" he asked, his voice low.
I blinked. "I-I told you before, no kissing anymore."
I watch him look at my lips. "I won't kiss you unless you ask me to."
I shook my head. "I won't." Promise.
Kade smiled, that fucking half-smile half-smirk. "You'll beg me to."
=================
Chapter 7: Challenge Accepted
Chapter 7
Challenge Accepted
A year ago...
From: Trina Martinez
My house. 9 PM.
Bring your own booze.
From: Asher Flores
Girl, im so bored. Gala tayo! San ka?
I squinted at my phone after reading those two messages. It has been a long since I
went to a house party. It was roughly 2 months ago, I guess. And now I'm itching to
go at Trina's. I could ask Asher to come with me. The last time we partied
together, it was cut short when she went to the bathroom and then Kade showed up
and freaked me out.
Come with me at Trina's?

***
"Putang inang giliw naman! Bakit pa kasi ako sumama sa'yo?" Asher hissed as we
stood outside of our blockmate's house. "Naku! Kakatayin ako ni Yap kapag nalaman
niyang pumunta ako ng house party!" she said, her voice sounded really scared.
I looked at her. "Girl, he's not your boyfriend, okay? You can do whatever you
wanna do without reporting to him," I said, trying to calm her down.
Asher sighed. "Iba kami ni Yap. Magagalit yun!"
I grinned at her. Why is she so nervous? "Ano ka ba? We won't get separated naman!
We'll go home together."
I grabbed her arm and dragged her inside. "Bakit kasi kinaibigan pa kitang party
girl ka?" Asher mumbled.
I rolled my eyes. "Because aside from Yap, I'm the only one who puts up with your
filthy mouth."
"Hmm... Fair enough! Lika na nga! Para makauwi
agad!" she huffed. I just chuckled. This is a freaking party, why should we go home
early?
As much as I hated EDM, I really missed dancing. It's kind of ironic because I'm a
shitty dancer too. I'm awkward and I have two-left feet. But the rush... Gods, the
rush was enough for me to forget that I'm making myself look stupid while dancing.
I don't any liquid courage to dance tonight. I'm so stressed out and I needed the
release.
Asher and I were in the middle of the dance floor, dancing like freaks, when
suddenly a huge guy tugged Asher's arm. I was about to punch the guy when I
recognized him. It was Yap, her hot guy best friend. Wow. Why did I just notice it
now?
"What the hell are you doing here, Ash?" Uh-oh, someone's mad. You can tell it just
by looking at his face. His nostrils were flaring and his jaw was clenched tight.
Asher grinned at him. "I'm here to party! Ikaw, anong ginagawa mo dito, kups?"
"Nandito ako dahil may nag-text sakin na nandito ka raw," he hissed. Why is he so
mad? Asher's not doing anything wrong naman! He's definitely not her keeper. "This
isn't your scene, Ash. You're not supposed to be here."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Ash argued, hurt.
Yap sighed. "Ash, this isn't a normal house party. Kumain ka ba nung barbecue?
Uminom ka ba ng beer na hindi mo kinuha ng sarili mo?" His eyes softened as he
asked her questions and looked at her as if something's wrong with her body.
Asher shook her head.
"Alam mo naman ibig kong sabihin, diba? You might
get roofied here. Paano kung nakainom ka ng may halong drugs? Kahit hindi mo
intension, lalabas sa blood test mo yun! For God's sakes, Asher, you're an athlete!
Monthly tayo nagpapacheck ng dugo. Matatanggal ka sa school kapag nag-positive ka
dun."
Asher's eyes widened. "Oh my God! Talaga ba?"
I gasped when I realized what will happen to Asher if we had done things
differently tonight. Shit. She's right from the start. Going here is a stupid
decision on my part.
"I'm sorry. I didn't think!" I said, ashamed. This isn't my first time, I know the
bad and good sides of partying. I should've thought things through muna.
Yap shook his head, disappointed. "Asher, let's get you home." He took her hand and
started to drag her out.
Asher stopped him. "Wait, si Louisse!"
"I got her." I tensed when I felt Kade's arm around my shoulder.
Asher's eye widened. She looked at me first before her eyes came back to Kade.
"Okay. Sige, mauna na kami. Ihatid mo siya pauwi ha?"
I looked at Kade and saw him nodded.
As we watch Asher and Yap leave, Kade opened his mouth. "You shouldn't be here."
"I know." I sighed as I took his arm of my shoulders.
"C'mon, let's get you home too," he said as his hand on my arm slid to my hand.
I felt my heart stopped beating for a second. It resumed but it was too damn strong
now. "I don't wanna go home yet," I found myself saying.
Kade nodded as he intertwined his fingers with mine. "You wanna stay at my condo?
We could order pizza," he led the way out and I just watched his back
as we walked. Oh my gods. He's holding my hand! Shit! We're just holding our hands!
"What do you say?" he asked when we got near his truck.
I smiled at him. "You had me at pizza."

***
"Why do we always end up at your place eating pizza?" I asked before munching on my
pizza slice.
He shrugged. "That's how we roll, Salazar," he said. Both of us were slumped on his
couch, watching reruns of Friends.
I sat up straight. "Seriously. Why? Are you making me fat?" Every time na lang na
I'm here, I always end up eating pizzas like there's no tomorrow.
Thank the gods for fast metabolism.
Kade looked over me before he grinned. "Yup."
I chuckled. "What? Why? You're kidding, right?" I asked, still chuckling. I stopped
when I noticed that he's actually serious. "You're serious. Bakit nga?"I asked,
genuinely confused.
He sat up straight. "You won't like my answer." Then he took a sip of his beer.
My attention was caught by his neck. I watched his Adam's bobbed as he drank his
beer straight. Fuck. Humina ba yung a/c?
I shook my head."I still wanna hear it, regardless."

He wiped his mouth with a tissue paper. Fuck. Bakit parang that move was hot din?
"Fine," Kade huffed. He looked straight to my eyes. "I don't like the way other
guys look at you."
Wait. I'm buffering...
"Do you like me, Ongpauco?" I found myself asking. No need to beat around the bush.
"Do YOU like me, Salazar?" Well, I don't hate
him now. I was about to answer him when my phone pinged in my lap.
From: Asher Flores
Beks, nasa dorm na ako. Text ka when you get home.
I'm at Kade's condo.
From: Asher Flores

MY SHIP IS FREAKING SAILING PA RIN!!!
"What's so funny?" he asked when I dropped my phone on my lap.
"Asher," I answered before taking a sip of my coke.
Kade stretched his arms up, his shirt rode up. Oh shit. That V-line. "Hmm... Who
was that guy pala?"
I snapped out of my stupor. "Oh. It was her best friend, Yap."
"He's just a best friend?" Kade asked, quite surprised. I chuckled at his
expression.
"It's a little disturbing no? He's so overprotective of her!" I said, rolling my

eyes.
"They're best friends. Maybe he thinks of her as his sister, too. I have little
sisters and I am overprotective when it comes to them," he explained with a shrug.
"I bet he has feelings for her." I mean, they're best friends since they were kids.
It's impossible that guy doesn't have any feelings for Asher. Asher is a beautiful
girl, inside and out. She's hot pa.
"Maybe. But if he has, why is she not his yet?" Kade has a point there.
"Maybe he's scared it'll ruin their friendship?"

He shook his head. "Nah. I'd bet my left nut Asher's the one who has feelings for
Yap."
"Eew!" I said in disgust. "You're gonna lose that bet, Ongpauco."
Kade laughed. "Nah. If I win, you'll wash my dirty laundry." He leaned closer to
me. "Including my nasty football uniform," he said as he wagged his brows.
I leaned closer pa. "If I win, I'm gonna give you an extreme make-over," I said
with a smirk. I won't back down, Ongpauco.
He leaned back and looked at me like I'm crazy. "What? That's crazy!"
"Scared?"I mocked him with his own word.
"Never," he scoffed. Yabang.
"Okay. That's a deal, then," I said with a grin.
He shook his head before he stood up in front of me. "Let's make this more
exciting."
I tilt my head to the said. What is he thinking now? "I'm listening," I asked,
curious.
He sat on his haunches in front of me. "I dare you to go on a date with me in our
Halloween Party at The Ledge."
I snorted. "Really? You can't find a date on your own?" I shook my head in
disbelief. "And that's like a month away pa."
He smirked as he planted both of his hand near my legs, caging me."You know I can.
I just want it to be you. But knowing you, you'll reject me right away if I asked
nicely."
Well he has a point there. I rolled my eyes. Why don't he just dare me to be his
girl if that's how thinks of me.
"Okay. I dare you to be my fake boyfriend for Halloween," I blurted without

thinking. My eyes widened. Fuck. What the hell, L? Don't you have any filter?
"Challenge accepted."
=================
Chapter 8: Make-Up Sesh
Chapter 8
Make-Up Sesh
A year ago...
"Glad you could make it," he said with a smirk when he opened the door. I stood
just stood there, blinking at his appearance. Holy smokes. That broad shoulders...
those biceps and v-line. Good god. He's ripped and he's proud of it.
The guy literally has no shame.
I snapped out of my reverie when he tipped my chin up with his index finger. "Hey,
eyes up here."The little shit was grinning now.Gosh. Those perfect white teeth and
full lips. If he wasn't my study buddy, I would have punched his pretty face na.
He's so smug! No matter how much I wanna kiss him sometimes, gusto ko rin siyang i-
kick between his legs.
I pushed his hand away before I went inside his condo. "Will you please put on a
shirt?" I asked him when I sat down on his couch. Kasi it's so distracting. How
will I able to study for our finals if I'm freaking distracted?
"Do you not like what you see?" he asked when he sat down beside.
"I won't even dignify that with an answer," I deadpanned. I took my books and notes
out of my bag and placed it on the center table.
"What, you're not happy with these guns?" He flexed both of his arms when I looked
up at him.
Holy tacos.
I clenched my jaw. "No," I snapped.
Kade grinned. "Yes, you do. Admit it, I look like a Greek god."
I rolled my eyes. "You mean Cupid? He's Roman not Greek, Ongpauco."
"Ouch. You're bad for my ego." He chuckled as he stood up. He picked up the shirt
hanging on the hand rest of the
couch. He put it on before he sat down beside me again. Good. I could study na
without distractions.
"Anyway, I have an idea." I looked at him and tilted my head. Ano kaya? "Pustahan
tayo, you want? Let's make our finals more exciting."
"I'm all ears," I squinted.
"Whoever has the lower grades on International Law and Math would have to do
something embarrassing while filmed." He smirked and I just watched him, waiting
for him to add more. "What do you say, Salazar?"
"We're not even done with our first bet," I said with a smug smile.
His smile turned into a frown. "I can't believe I lost that shit."
It turned out, Yap had confessed to Asher that he had fallen in love with her. Last
year pa. Too bad for Yap, Asher didn't feel the same. I really felt bad for Yap
when I asked Asher about it. He's cool daw and still acted normal... like her best
friend pa rin. But it's too hard to be friendzoned.
I told Asher din about our little bet. Now she's excited din to see Kade's fully
made-up face.
"Yeah. You totally read him wrong. You're a guy pa naman and you didn't pick up his
possessiveness?"I chortled at his glum expression. "So when are we gonna do that
extreme make-over, Ongpauco?"
Before he could answer, there were loud banging and shouting on his door. Kade
scratched his head and cursed. He stood up and went straight to his door. He
groaned when he saw who's at the door through
the peephole.
He opened it and suddenly two guys went pass him. They stopped on their tracks when
he saw me. I just stared at them. My resting-bitch-face set.
"You remember my cousin Lake at The Ledge?" Kade asked me while pointing at the
tall, grinning, cute guy. I nodded. He's Kade's cousin. He was drunk that night.
Lake waved. "Hi! You're Louisse, right?"
I nodded."Hi! Yup, that's me."
"This one's River," Kade pointed at the guy standing near the door. River just
nodded at me. Wow. He's handsome too. What with the Ongpauco genes? They're
insanely gorgeous people. Even Kade's little sisters are gorgeous. I bet they're
gonna break hearts in the future like their ahias.
"Bro, sorry. We thought you're alone. We're gonna head out na. Sama mo siya at the
sem-ender party next week." Lake looked at me. "You could bring your friends. Just
make sure you introduce them to us." River slapped him on the back of his head.
"We're going, guys." River waved his hand and left. Lake went after him.
Kade slammed the door shut. "So you just met my cousins," he sighed as he sat
beside me.
"Yup. I finally met the three infamous Ongpaucos of DLU." Kade snorted. I shrugged.
"Anyway, are we gonna study ba right away? We could do the make-over muna. I'm
bored," I said with a frown. I don't wanna study yet.
He rolled his eyes. "Fuck it. Let's get this over with." He leaned back on the
couch.
I pumped my fist. "Yes! Wait! I'll just prepare my make-up." I jumped
up and took out my make-up kit from my bag. I placed it on the center table.
"You ready to be pretty, Ongpauco?"I asked as I discreetly set up my camera phone.

This needed to be documented.
Kade just groaned.
***
"Wow. Smokey eyes suits you," I said as I plied blush-on on his cheeks. "It brings
out the color of your eyes." I chuckled at his seemed to be permanent frown. "Hey,
stop frowning. Lipstick is next na." I grabbed his face. "Slightly open your
mouth."
I applied the red lipstick on his full lips. "Ayan. You're so pretty na."
"You better shut up if you don't want this lipstick on your mouth." I just rolled
my eyes at his foul mood. Does he feel emasculated? Arte ha.
I slapped his shoulder. "Last na! You can clean up na after we take pictures," I
said with a grin.
He stood up immediately. He shook his head. "Hey, no picture taking! That's not
part of the deal." The sight was too funny. He's so manly yet he looked so pretty
din. I never thought I could do this to him. He has this intimidating aura. But
when you get to know him, you'll realize that he's a real softy, especially to his
little sisters. And maybe to me?
I shrugged. "Okay." I took my phone and let him see me press the end button of the
video cam app.
He looked pissed. "Fuck! You recorded everything?" he asked in disbelief.
"What? It's not like ipapakita ko to no. Well, kay Asher lang syempre," I said with
a laugh. Bahala siya if he gets mad.
He sighed as he raked his fingers on his hair. "Fine. Kay Asher lang. Make
sure it's private lang if you post it online."
"You're not mad?"
"It's just a fucking video. No big deal. It's not like it's a sex tape." He stood
up and left the room.
"Hey! We're are you going? We're gonna pick dresses and shoes pa!" I teased him. He
just flipped me off. I just chuckled.
Fair enough. I recorded our make-up sesh without asking him in the first place.
***
Kade emerged from his room, his face clear of make-up. I was gonna tease him but I
stopped when I saw the determination on his eyes as he stalked me.
I stood up from my seat. "H-Hey," I stuttered when his face was just inches away
from mine. My eyes widened when his hand found my nape. He squeezed it and I felt
it my insides squeezed too.
"My man-card just took a major hit, Salazar. I need get it back on its natural
state," he said with a low and raspy voice before his lips claimed mine.
Holy shit. Kade Ongpauco is kissing the hell out of me.
Instead of pushing him away, I found myself closing my eyes and wrapping my arms
around his neck. His lips were soft and hard against mine at the same time. It was
bruising. It was knee-buckling... toe-fucking-curling. His teeth bit my lower lip
before he moved away from me.
My eyes were wide when I opened them. We're both breathing hard and flushed. I've
never been kissed like that. It was too consuming. But at the same time, I know my
lips are ruined for everyone now.
"I thought you're only gonna kiss me if I asked you to?" I asked when I recovered
from that kiss.
"When I opened up that door, I saw your eyes begging me, Salazar." He smirked as he
sat down at the couch.
"I did not!" I scoffed. Was I looking at him that way kanina? Shit. I better
practice my pokerface again. It's fucked up now.
"Whatever makes you sleep at night. C'mon, let's study now." He grabbed my hand and
pulled me down. I ended up sitting on his lap. I immediately moved away from him.
Fuck. How am I gonna study after that kiss?
=================
Chapter 9: Sem-Ender
Chapter 9
Sem-Ender
Eleven Months Ago...
Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit.
I just sent my term paper to our professor in International Law.
I pulled my hair with both hands as I paced around my bedroom. Gosh. Nababaliw na
ako.
Breathe. I need to freaking breathe. Nakahabol ka sa deadline. Youdid good din. No

need to panic and hyperventilate, Louisse. I need to take my mind off on my grades.
I need to chill. I just need to get distracted today.
I should call Asher. She can take the job. She'll make me laugh my ass off. I know
it. But she's in training today. Her competition is fast-approaching and her focus
needs to be on it only. I don't to cause her any trouble again. Yap will get mad, I
just know it.
I stopped on my tracks when I heard my phone pinged. I went to my bedside table and
took my phone.
What's up?
I found myself smiling while reading Kade's text. Why the heck am I smiling? Ugh.
Hindi ako kinikilig.
Nothing much. I replied. Ayan. I sounded cool and and not caring.
You done with requirements?
I waited for five minutes muna before I replied. Yup. Done and passed everything.
Good. Will I see you at the sem-ender?
Yup. See you!
Oh gods.
I sounded so excited. I hope he won't notice!
Can't wait.
A squeal escaped from my lips before I could stop myself. Good thing, I'm in my
room alone. That was so weird. I just acted like a boy-crazy girl. Shit. I need to
reply! I need to sound nonchalant.... Or cool.
Missed me already?
If I say yes, will you admit you missed me too?
I jumped on my bed face first and did a victory dance horizontally. I'm so freaking
weird. He's not even my crush!
Then why am I acting like a freaking loon? Oh shit.
I jumped when I heard someone knocked on my door. I sat up and straightened my

disheveled hair. "L! Can I come in?" I heard Kim's high-pitched voice.
"It's open!" I shouted back.
The door opened and Kim went inside my room. "Anong oras pala natin susunduin si
J?" asked Kim.
I looked at the time on my phone. It's 12:25PM palang. "6PM pa labas niya sa uni,
right?" I asked.
Kim nodded. "So mga around six pm. Okay! Tinanong ko lang para para makapag-ayos
ako on time," she said with a grin.
"Oo. Makakapagpa-ganda pa ka!" I teased her. Sometimes, Kim really gets boy-crazy.
She suddenly frowned. "Sure kang papapasukin ako dun? Graduate na ako last year
pa."
"Akong bahala sa'yo." If she doesn't get in, Kade will pay for it. Lagot siya sa
akin.
"Sabi mo yan ha!" she said before leaving
me alone.
I jumped on my seat when my phone pinged. Shit. I forgot about Kade's texts!
Hey, silence means yes.
Uhh, no. Silence means I haven't typed a single damned thing because I just talked
with my roommate.
What's your costume pala for Halloween?
We're changing subject now? Very subtle.

I rolled my eyes. Why can't he just let it go? He knows I won't admit that I miss
him, too. That's too cheesy. It makes me cringe.
Are you gonna wear your pink fairy wings? With the pink wig and all?
Make sure you wear a tutu, too!
Fuck no.
I chuckled at his reply.
Sayang. I replied.
That's a weird fetish, you know.
Anyway, what's your costume?
I don't have one pa.
Can I suggest 'sexy angel?'
I grinned. What a horndog.
Careful, Ongpauco. Your boner is showing.

I love it when you text me like that.
;)
I grinned as I sent him the 'wink' emoji.
***
"Mukhang bata si J!" I
heard Kim said from the front passenger seat of my car. I watched J ran towards my
car. I sighed.
What will I do to you, Jamie Navarro?
She looked like a freaking baby. She's bare-faced. Her dress is super plain pa. No
accessory pa aside from her diamond stud-earring and wrist watch. She's got a ton
of bags pa. Did she carry that all-day?
J stopped in front of my car. . "Dude, hindi ba sinabi ko sayong mag-ayos ka?" I

asked, irritated that she didn't listened to us, again.
"Nag-ayos naman ako!" she argued. Yeah, right. I bet she's not wearing any make-up.
I just rolled my eyes and grabbed her hand. I opened the door to my car and let her
inside the backseat. "Big deal to no! First time mo kayang gigimik!" I said as I
got in to my car.
I saw her frowned at the rear view mirror. "Alam ko no! Nag-ayos na nga ako! Kita
mo naman, naka black dress ako. Kelan mo ba akong nakitang mag-dress?" she argued.
I rolled my eyes at her. "Dressing up is not enough, dude. Kailangan mo kaya ng

make-up!"
I saw her cringed. "Nakakatamad kayang mag-make-up!"
Good God, girl! Yes, it's nakakatamad but the result is worth it! Can't she
understand that? She's real pretty naman but she's not taking care of herself. How
will she have a boyfriend if she doesn't clean up? Some guys are not superficial
but they still prefer to date girls who are presentable at the very least.
"Ayusan na lang natin siya, L. Alam mo namang di papatalo sa pangangatwiran yang si
Jamie," K said before I could talk back.
"Salamat,
K ha!" J said.
I heard a slapping noise. "Umupo ka nga ng maayos! Para kang bata!" I shook my
head. J's the baby in the trio and she acts like it talaga.
I looked at her through the rear view mirror. "Dapat magkilos dalaga ka sa bar ha.
Act your age, dude. At the same time, forget your inhibitions. Time natin ito para
magpakasaya tonight! Kalimutan na muna natin ang stressful nating buhay." The three
of us really need this because we just finished our deadlines. Pati si Kim, she had
a deadline yesterday. I just don't know if it was for work.
I noticed Jamie pouting. I was waiting for a 'Mother Hen' joke but it didn't come.
She looked upset. I sighed. I just don't want her to feel out-of-place there. I'm
just gonna do my best to make her look prettier later.
***
"Wait! Girls, call of nature lang!" K yelled and left, not waiting for our
response.
What the hell? I looked at Jamie."We're not supposed to leave each other!" I
shouted, panicking.
She held my shoulders then shook me. "Would you just chill? Nag-CR lang naman
siya!" she shouted back.
I scratched my head. I can't freaking chill! Si Kimberly yun! She may be the oldest
but she's too naïve at times! "Yun na nga! Delikado mag-CR ng mag-isa. Baka mamaya
may sumunod dun!"
Jamie rolled her eyes. "Then go after her!"
She doesn't get it! She doesn't get the dangers of partying! I just told them
earlier that they might get roofied or something! Pinitik ko siya sa forehead niya.
"Paano ka naman ha?" I asked with a glare.
Jamie
shrugged. "Wala naman sigurong mangyayari sakin dito? Well, except baka matapakan
ang mga paa ko," she said as she looked at her feet.
Shit. I just can't leave her here. She's the baby, she shouldn't be left too. But
Kim might get into trouble at the comfort room. Someone might have followed her.
Shit. I could just bring Jamie with me. I was gonna tell her that when she shoved
me to the direction where Kim went. "Go! Maraming tao dito! Walang mangyayaring di
maganda!"
Fine. Nothing will happen to her in the middle of the dance floor. "Huwag kang
aalis dito!" I told her before I ran to where K went.
"Kim?" I called out when I entered the comfort room. I saw her jumped in surprise.
She was standing in front of the mirror... fiddling with her phone.
"Akala ko ba you're gonna pee?" I asked as I crossed my arms.
K grinned. "Sorry. Hindi lang ako makahinga ng maayos dun. Sobrang daming tao."
I rolled my eyes. "You left there to get a breather... at a comfort room no less."
I looked over her phone as saw that she's browsing Facebook.
"Grabe. You left us there para mag Facebook?" I teased her.
Kim chuckled."Whatever. Lika na nga! Where's J? Iniwan mo dun?" she asked as she
put her phone in her front pocket.
I nodded. "Yeah. Saglit lang naman. Let's go na. She won't leave there."
But she wasn't at the dancefloor. Nor at our couches. Fuck. Where the hell did
Jamie go?
"Teka, tatawagan ko!" I heard Kim said. I shook my head and pointed at the couch.
"She
left her purse. I saw her put her phone there. Gosh! Bakit niya iniwan!" Good gods,
J. You really are stupid at times.
"Baka naglibot lang yun out of boredom. Let's go find her."
"Okay. I'll call you ha. Just hold on to your phone," I said, trying to calm
myself. Jamie is here. She's just wandering around. She won't leave naman. She's
not that stupid. I hope.
***
It had been an hour and I haven't seen any traces of Jamie. Where the hell did she
go? Fuck. I'm terrified. Anong sasabihin ko kina Tita Lily if something really bad
happened to her? Anong sasabihin k okay Ate Bianca? Oh my gods. I hope she's okay.
But I looked everywhere. I even went outside but kahit anino niya, hindi ko nakita.
Maybe nagkasalisi kami? Maybe she's still here inside.
My phone vibrate. I looked at it and saw a text message.
I've been looking for you all night. Where are you?
Shit. I totally forgot about him. I was about to reply about our situation when
Kim's photo appeared on the screen. Holy tacos! Maybe she saw J already!
I answered it. "Hello! Did you saw her na?" I asked. I looked up and saw the other
side of the VIP area. I didn't went there. I know Jamie won't be there because of
the bouncers guarding their side.
"Hindi pa! Hindi mo pa rin siya nakikita?" I heard the panic in her voice.
I rubbed my face. "No. I haven't."
I heard her sniffles. Shit. Kim's crying. "Kasalanan ko to. Kung hindi ako umalis,
hindi mo ko susundan. Baka kung ano nang nangyari sa kanya."
I squeezed my eyes shut. "Hey, don't think like that. She's here. I'm sure. She's
not that stupid." Fuck. I really hope so. Sana she didn't go home with a fucking
stranger. "Let's not panic. There's an area here na hindi ko pa nasisilip. Maybe
she's there," I said to Kim as I went near at the other side.
The bouncers let me in. Maybe they knew me because I partied here countless of
times before.
"Just keep on praying. Malakas ka kay Lord, right?" I told her as my eyes scanned
the area.
Kim sniffled again. "I hope and pray talaga na walang mangyaya-"
I gasped at the sight in front of me and I just stood there, staring at them.
"L? L, are you there? Bakit? Anong meron? Nakita mo na ba si Jamie?" I snapped when
I heard Kim's panicked voice.
I felt my throat closed up. The walls around me were building up again. How could
you be so stupid, L? How could you let someone in?
You were crushing on a hordog. A horndog who's flirting with the girl on his lap. I
watched him whisper something in her. The slut giggled when his hands found her
hips. He continued to whisper at her and she just giggled like a fucking hyena on
his lap.
I swallowed and cleared my throat. "No. It's not her," I told Kim, my voice
strangely calm.
"Are you okay?" I heard her ask. "Please, don't let Lulu come out."
I let out a laugh. No, Lulu, my mean alter-ego, will not come out. This is so
beneath her. "Will find, J. Let's get out of here. Baka she's outside na," I said
as I turned my back on them.
I left. I'm gone. I'm done.
=================
Chapter 10: Small World
Chapter 10
Small World
Please, God. Let her be safe. Please. I hope she's okay wherever she is.
I paced around the living room, waiting for something to happen. Shit. Wala pa
akong tulog. My emotions are all over the place. I still feel like I'm choking up.
The walls surrounding and keeping me from exploding were suffocating me now.
Kim was a wreck but I still managed to make her go to her work. Thank the gods
talaga that she left. I'm gonna lose my mind if dalawa kaming magkasama ang nagwo-
worry.I know it's a shitty thing to do to make her go to her work but we're both
gonna explode if we're freaking out together.
I jumped when Jamie's phone rang. My hips almost bumped the couch. Thank God I
caught myself just in time. I immediately grabbed her phone from the center table.
"Hello?" I answered the call warily.
The caller gasped. "Oh my God! L! Thank God you picked up!" I collapsed on the
chair. The relief was that overwhelming. Shit. That was so scary. I'll never forget
what she put us through last night! Lalo na if what happened last night e wala
namang katuturan,
I straightened up before yelling at her. "JAMIE NAVARRO! Where have you been?!
Dude! Hindi kami nakatulog ni K! We're worried sick!" We were not just worried
sick. We were fucking terrified.
She paused before she answered again. "I'm in Pallas Athena Taguig. Can you please
pick me up?" she asked in a small voice. I felt a twinge of guilt. She must've been
scared too. But it didn't sound
like she's in an emergency or something.
"Of course!" I answered just before I grabbed my keys. I didn't bother changingmy
clothes. I ran until I got to the parking lot. I beeped my car and jumped inside.
"Wait for me there. Naku, J! I'm going to ream your ass!" I said before hanging up
on her. I threw my phone on the passenger's seat beside me before I sped off.
***
"Explain, Jamie," I told her when we both got inside of my car.
I heard her sigh. "I fucked up," she said with a defeated voice.
I rolled my eyes as I started driving. "Clearly! What were you thinking? Bigla ka
na lang nawala kagabi ng walang pasabi? K and I were so scared! Hindi namin alam
kung paano namin kakausapin yung parents mo if something happened to you!" I
shouted, losing my cool. She just kept her eyes on the road with a somber
expression.
I know she's not proud of whatever happened last night but I was on a roll. I was
so damn mad and disappointed. "Hindi mo man lang ba kami naisip ni K, Jamie? Kahit
sarili mo na lang, hindi mo ba naisip na baka mapahamak ka? Have you not watched
the news lately? Madaming namamatay! Madaming nari-rape!" I bombarded her with
question. Gods. I'm so gigil. I'm white-knuckling the steering wheel!
"I'm so sorry, L," I heard her whisper from my side.
"God! If only you knew how K blamed herself kagabi! Sabi niya, kung di daw siya
umalis ng dance floor, edi sana this wouldn't happen!
First gimik natin yun last night. It was supposed to be a fun night! We'll enjoy
ourselves at uuwi tayo together!" I inhaled deeply. I need to calm down. I don't
wanna get into accident. "Why were you there, J? Who brought you there?" I asked as
I looked over at her.
Her eyes didn't meet mine and she slumped back on the seat. "I met a guy last
night," she started. I bet my tongue to keep a sarcastic remark. I kept my eyes on
the road. "Hindi ko alam kung anong nangyari sa akin pero napapayag niya ako to do
things I wouldn't normally do."
I tensed before I looked back at her. "Like what?" Shit. Please. God.
"Body shots. Dirty dancing," she said. I noticed she's holding back.
"That guy knew you're innocent," I concluded. From the looks of it, he really knew
what he was doing and who's he dealing with. An innocent girl. Whoever the
douchebag was, I'm gonna kick him between his legs.
Jamie sighed. "Not anymore, I'm not."
I stepped on the brake too damn hard.
"WHAT?!" I asked, my eyes wide in confusion. Did I hear her right?
"Sinuko ko na ang Bataan!" Jamie wailed.

What the hell? She... She had sex last night? She's not a virgin anymore? What?!
"You swiped your v-card?" I asked, still in shock.I continued to drive when I heard
the insistent horns behind us.
She nodded. "Hindi na ako virgin! And I don't even know kung gumamit siya ng
condom!" She looked at me and grabbed my right arm. "L! Ayokong mabuntis!" she said
while shaking me.
"Stop
it! I'm driving!" I hissed at her. She's out of her mind na!
Jamie stopped and we both got silent for a while.
"What should I do, L?" she asked after she calmed down a bit.
I sighed. Why is she asking me this? Even though I have a partygirl/slutty

reputation in school, it's just a reputation. I'm still a virgin and the extent of
my knowledge is just in second base! "I don't know," I answered her honestly. "I'm
not really prepared for this, you know. The wildest thing I ever did was when I
made out with that douchebag football player."
Fuck. Bakit napasok na naman siya sa isip ko? I don't need to think of him now. Or
for fucking ever.
I shook the unwelcome thoughts away. "We're going to figure something out. There's
something naman siguro na pwede mong inumin, right? Like a morning-after pill?" I
asked. I know there's away. There's got to be something. I know it.
***
It had been a week since Jamie's V-card swiping incident. Jamie told us what she
remembered that night. Her memories were hazy daw and she doesn't remember anything
after they left The Ledge. I call bullshit. But I didn't tell her. Maybe she was
just too embarrassed to tell everything that went down.
Including her virginity.

She thinks she lost it with a random stranger. We even panicked that she might get
pregnant! And because of that, we had an emergency sex education thanks to our
nurse friends. She took a pregnancy test too just to make sure. Thank God it was
negative.
I don't know what will happen if the test result turned positive. She'll be
crushed.
It had also been a week since I saw Kade last. He still kept on texting me,
sometimes he'd call. I never read his texts. I just delete them. I never answer his
calls. I just let it ring until he gives up.
My phone pinged. Speaking of the devil.
I deleted the message immediately. I don't need to know what he has to say. I'm
done.
My phone pinged again. Instead of swiping the conversation thread to delete it, I
accidentally tapped it and opened his text message. I groaned at my own stupidity.
Did I do something wrong, Salazar? Why are you ignoring me?
Read: 11:09 AM
Shit. Whoever invented this seenzone thing is an asshat.
Whatever it is, I'm sorry.

Read: 11:11 AM
He doesn't even know why I'm acting like this. I scoffed. He's fucking clueless. Or
he's just a prick that won't quit until he gets what he wants.
Wow. Seenzoned.
Read: 11:13AM
What did he expect? He knows I'm ignoring him. Why would I reply to him now?
I'm gonna call. Please answer.
Read: 11:15AM
I shook my head. The nerve of this guy.
My phone
vibrated and his photo appeared on the screen. I sighed. I thought you're done, L?
I punched the power button to drop the call. I went to his contact information and
tapped the 'Block this Caller' button. I put my phone under my pillow before I
closed my eyes and fell asleep.
***
I was screaming my head off. Hanggang dito ba naman? In my car? On the radio
program that we're listening to? The Ongpauco cousins pa rin? There's a trace of
Cascade Ongpauco pa rin? Ugh!
It's a small world after all. I almost samg.
Gods. I have to play this off. Like I'm fangirling. I hope they won't notice I'm
not trying to not vomit any moment now.
"Bakit? Anong meron sa kanila?" J asked. I looked at her from the rearview mirror,
she was frowning. Shit.
"Hindi mo sila kilala? Saan ka bang planeta nakatira? Yung totoo, saang school ka
nag-aaral?" K asked her in disbelief. Thank the gods and we're in the middle of a
heavy traffic. I don't need to pull over to calm myself down.
"Dude, sa school natin din sila nag-aaral," I answered immediately when she looked
at me. And what the hell? Even though I'm probably their number one hater right
now, I can't believe J didn't know anyone of the Ongpaucos.
"Talaga? Bakit parang di ko naman sila kilala?" she asked, still frowning. "Bakit
kilala mo sila, L?"
Shit. I felt my cheeks heating up. "Of course, I know them. They're famous nga
sa uni," I said, looking away. Eyes on the road, L!
K spoke, "Alam mo, just Google them." J just shook her head.
"Balita ko, these guys are the kings of DLU Gray Wolves," A. Ford said. I rolled my
eyes. What a fanboy. "Hindi na ako magtataka, they're dominating the UAAP and the
world of sports outside their school."
"Lake Ongpauco's leading his team to the finals. Ever since he joined the baseball
team, hindi na sila nawala sa finals. Mad props to him," Draky Drake said. I've
seen footage of the baseball team at the uni, I must admit that they're good.
"I like Kade Ongpauco. Dude's a monster in the field! I've never been that
entertained in an American Football game," A. Ford gushed. I snorted. I haven't had
the chance to watch him. I doubt that he's that good. A. Ford's just exaggerating.
Masyadong fanboy.
JJ chuckled. "I'm gonna confess. I'm a River Ongpauco fan." I nodded. I'm a fan
too. Kade made me watch his race one time when I was at his condo. Ugh. Quit
thinking about that horndog!
"Saang sports yung River Ongpauco?" I heard J asked.
"Formula 1 Racing," I answered. K shushed us.
"Let's bring the boys out! The Ongpauco Cousins!" All three hollered. "Welcome to
Toys for the Big Boys, guys!"
"Thanks for having us," I heard a new voice. Must be one of the Ongpaucos.
JJ spoke, "Pakilala naman kayo sa listeners, guys."
"Kade Ongpauco of DLU Gray Wolves." I shivered at the sound of his voice. Damnit.
"Lake Ongpauco. The guy who covers
all bases." That earned chuckles at the radio booth.
"River Ongpauco." He's clearly a man of few words.
"So, River... You won third place at the South-East qualifiers a week ago.
Congratulations, man!"
Oh. It must've been his victory party last week where I saw Kade flirting with the
hyena on his lap. The scene was burned into my head. I hate it. It makes me wanna
vomit every time I remember it.
"So what's up with you, guys now? Other than your sports careers?" Well, they're
probably reaping the benefits of being a famous athlete. School night parties.
Booze. Banging random girls.
Yay.
"Nothing much," Kade answered. I bit back a stream of curse words. Liar.
"Oh! Riv's crushing on a girl!" someone shouted. Must be Lake.
"Am not," River said.
"You are! You've been at The Ledge every night!" Lake said, chuckling.I rolled my
eyes. See? Benefits.
"You see, Riv's obsessing over this quote-spouting girl."
I froze. Quote-spouting girl. There's only one girl I know who quote-spoute.
I yelled 'Holy shiz!' as I suddenly stepped on the brake.
"Oh my God! A week ago sa The Ledge! Oh my God! Quote-spouting girl daw!" K
shrieked, voicing out the wild thoughts on my head. This couldn't be just a
coincidence!
"Baka hindi lang naman ako yung ganun!" I head J said from the back.
"What was her name? Annabeth?" Kade asked.
I watched J's face paled. And then I remember her stor.
Everything just clicked.

Annabeth. Percy. River. Jamie.
"Oh my God! Ikaw nga yun, J!" K shrieked.
I watched her fiddle with her phone. She paled even more as she stared at her
phone. Ngayon lang niya siguro ni-search him at Google?
"Oh my gods! Call him!" L yelled.
"Wala akong load!" She said in panic. I just threw her my phone.
"Busy yung line!" she said, the phone still on her ear.
"Keep going!" I said as I continued to drive.
"L! Wag na lang! Di ko alam yung sasabihin ko! Wala naman akong kailangang sabihin
kay Percy!" J said,about to chicken out. The girl just hated phone conversations.
I shook my head. This is her chance to know everything and she'll just throw it
away? And they might make kwento of what happened that night! "J! They're going to
divulge your one-night with him! You need to stop those idiots!"
Minutes later, I heard someone asked River. "What did she do ba? Why can't you
forget about her?" This traffic just won't quit!It would be easier to dissect his
responses if we're parked at home na.
"The girl wrote 'Avada Kedavra, MOFO' on his windows!" Lake answered for him,
laughing.
"They're making fun of me," J said, annoyed.
"No shit, Sherlock," I said, chuckling. I mean, what did she expect? They're
idiots!
"Well, this just got more interesting! I think I got her on the line!" JJ
sannounced. The music stopped then I heard JJ's voice. "Hello, Annabeth?"
"Am I on-air?" J stuttered. I caught
myself from banging my head on the steering wheel.
"Annabeth..." My jaw slackened. Wow. I can't imagine the mysterious guy I met in
Kade's condo is now talking to Jamie. Shit. He might have took her virginity!
"Oh my gods!" I whispered in awe... in disbelief. This is just saw weird.
"Hello, Percy," J answered coolly. Atta girl.
"What made you call, babe?" I saw J's eyes widened. He just called her 'babe!' This
is unbelievable!
"Don't call me 'babe'. Tumawag ako because I need answers!" she exclaimed.
"Uh-oh." I heard one of them said.
"I don't think now is the right time to talk," he responded.I was about to agree
when J exploded. Shit.
"Why did you do 'it'? Then, you weren't there when I woke up! You just left a note!
Anong klaseng lalaki ka?" K and I looked at each other, both with horrified
expression. "Tapos nakalagay sa note mo, 'Take care on your way home'? Hindi ko nga
alam paano ako uuwi nun!"
"Babe, I'll explain everything," he said, his voice still calm despite J's
outburst.
"Pwede ka ng mag-start mag-explain!" She said sarcastically. I shook my head. This

is a freaking disaster.
River sighed. "Not now. Let's talk some other time, okay?"
"Are you out of your Vulcan mind?!" J sputtered in disbelief. Uh-oh. The quote-
spouting girl just came out. "You think sasama pa ako sa'yo after what happened?"
"We should still talk privately," he said, starting to get annoyed. I would be.
Kaso he's gago din e. They wouldn't be in this situation if he didn't bring Jamie
home.
"No! I only want to know one thing!" she said. "Tell me, why'd you take it?" she
growled. I don't know if I imagined it or not but there's a smoke coming out from
her nose and ears.
River sighed again. "Look, I don't what you're talking about. But one thing's for
sure, nothing happened," he said, his voice calm.
"Liar! Kaya mong mag kiss and tell sa cousins mo pero hindi mo kayang magpakatotoo
sakin?" Uh-oh. There's really no stopping her. "Sana hindi na tayo magkita. Ever.
Hindi na ako magpapaloko sa'yo! Your soul-suckin' days are over, amigo!" she yelled
before hanging up.
"Dude, I don't know what to say," I said in disbelief.
"God, I made myself look stupid no?" she asked. Both K and I nodded. She had to
ask?
She smacked herself in the forehead. "Everybody knows you never go full retard,"
she said with a groan.
"Annabeth, I still want to see you. Tomorrow. 6PM. At our park," River's voice
boomed inside the car.
Jamie gasped.
"Holy tacos," L said in disbelief.

=================
Chapter 11: Directioner
Chapter 11
Directioner
From: Asher Flores
Still ignoring me, Salazar?
I stared long and hard at the text message Asher sent me. I wasn't ignoring her.
This isn't her. It's Kade.
What the hell, Asher?!I replied. That traitor.
From: Asher Flores

I'm just forwarding his text. Don't hate me. Messenger lang akez.
She replied two minutes after.
Stop it. Okay?!
From: Asher Flores
CAN'T! WON'T LET MY SHIP WRECK!!! #LAde
I growled. I tried to calm myself. I can't believe she's making up a hashtag! She
Brangelina'ed us!
Stop it. There was no ship.
From: Asher Flores

Wait. Mas okay ba kung #LouKade?
I rolled my eyes. Hindi talaga siya papatalo!
Fuck off.
From: Asher Flores
#KLouisse?
Srsly. OFF YOU FUCK.
Good God! She wouldn't stop!
From: Asher Flores
#Kaisse?
I'm gonna block you, too.
Asher Flores wants to Facetime...
Her cheeky grin appeared on the screen. "What now?" I asked, annoyed.
"I missed you, Butthurt Louisse," she singsonged. I rolled my eyes. Iba ka talaga,
Asher.
"What's up?" I asked as I sat up on my bed.
"Samahan mo ko sa mall, please? I need to shop!" she said suddenly, showing the
puppy eyes. She's shameless.
"Ikaw?" I scoffed in disbelief. "You need to shop? Diba you hate fashion?" I know
little about her but one thing she made clear, she hates fashion. I just shook my
head. Sometimes I think she's Jamie's taller, beki version.
"Beki man ako sa iyong paningin, ako'y babae pa rin.Tsaka I need new clothe dins.
May sasabihin ako sa'yong news!" she said, the grin on her face widened.
I frowned. "What news? Can't you spill it now?"
She shook her head. "Mas maganda sa personal! Para mayakap kita sa saya!" Ugh. What
a tease!
"Okay, then. Now na ba?" I asked as I jumped out of my bed. I need to prep na if I
don't wanna be late.
She nodded. "Sa may Megamall tayo. Mas okay daw mag shopping sa malayo ayon sa
aking source."
I stopped on my tracks. "Source?" I asked with a frown.
She pouted before she waved me goodbye. "Sige na! Alam ko mabagal ka kumilos kaya
you better move na! Bye! See you later! Namiss talaga kita!"
"I missed you too, AshFlo," I teased her. She hates it when we call her by her
moniker. The sports people said that she's like and 'ash flow' on the tennis court.
Fiery, fast-moving and dangerous.
Asher groaned. "Don't call me that."
I laughed at her face. "Then don't call me Butthurt Louisse again. Bye!" I hanged
up on her.
Okay. Time to shower.
***
When I stepped inside the arcades, I immediately heard Asher. "Louisse!" Asher
squealed as she run towards me.
I chuckled when she engulfed me with a hug. I hugged her back. Sometimes, I wonder
why someone so sweet and loyal like her has no other friends aside her best bud, me
and Kade. "You're too hyper! What's up ba?"
"Uy! May hindi mapakali sa ibabalita ko!" she giggled as she linked her right arm
with mine.
"C'mon, just say it!" I said as we walked towards the karaoke stage at the back.
"I just received the news yesterday." She stopped us in the middle. She was
grinning at me. "Beks, I'm qualified for SEA Games! I'm one step closer to the
Olympics!"
I jaw dropped. "Oh my God! Seryoso?" That's amazing! I watched the videos of her
games in Youtube and I must say she really earned her moniker. She was on fire on
court! I didn't recognize her at first!
She nodded eagerly. "Yes! Seryoso! I'm going to Myanmar!"
"Congratulations!" I squealed as I hug ger. "We have to celebrate!" I said when I

pulled away from her.
Asher laughed. "Mamaya! We have to do something pa no!" Oh right! Kaya pala she has
to buy new clothes, she's going to Myanmar! If I'm correct the SEA Games will start
by second week of December. It's almost
a month away.
"Oo nga pala. We have to shop for new clothes pa pala," I said, smacking my
forehead.
Asher's grin faded. "Actually, L..." she trailed off.
"What?" I asked, starting to get suspicious.
"You're one of my best friends na pero hindi pa tayo gaano magkakilala talaga..."
she said, going on circles.
I glared at her. "What's going on, Flores?"
She averted her eyes from mine. "Hindi ko alam kung mahilig ka or kung di mo gusto
kapag sinusurprise ka..." What the hell is going on? I have a terrible feeling
about this!
My eyes widened. "What did you do?"
She shook her head. "Hindi ako! But I'll give you a heads up dahil kahit inaaway mo
ko, ikaw lang yung nag-iisa kong friend sa uni!" she said, trying to assure me.
Nice fucking try.
"Will you stop blabbering? Just spill it!"
Asher sighed. "Nandito si Kade and he's going to apologize and surprise you."
I froze. "What's his surprise?"Shit. They set me up!
She rolled her eyes. "Sabi ko heads up lang, Louisse. I don't wanna spoil you.
Halika na!" she pulled my arms and dragged me towards the karaoke stage.
***
"HELL. NO," I said, my eyes wide in disbelief. Am I seeing things? Am I really

looking at Kade right now? Am I really listening to a One Direction song's intro
playing as his background? He hates 1D and us, Directioners! Well, except for his
little sisters.
"This is for you, Salazar. I'm sorry," he said through the mic. He's grinning pero
you know na he's embarrassed.
covered my mouth with both hands and gasped. HOLY TACOS! He's gonna sing What Makes
You Beautiful!
Asher laughed beside me. "Holy shit, he got it bad."
This isn't funny! Idadamay pa nila ako! "This is so embarrassing! I need to go!" I
was about to turn around and leave when Asher stopped me.
"Shit! Fastforward it to chorus!" I heard Kade ordered.
"Dito ka lang, bakla ka!" Asher made me turn around. "Humarap ka!" Shit.I think I'm
gonna pass out. There were too many camera phones trained on our faces. What the
hell? What kind of apology is this?
"Baby you light up my world like nobody else." I froze while watching him sing.
Holy shit. I'm in Twilight Zone. "The way that you flip your hair gets me
overwhelmed. But when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell," I heard the
audience screamed, especially the girls.
Wala ba siyang kahihiyan? My gods!
"You don't know, oh oh," he grinned. He pointed at me. "You don't know you're
beautiful!"
"I'm so embarrassed for him," I muttered. Asher just laughed beside.
"If only you saw what I can see you'll understand why I want you so desperately."
Asher pushed me close to the stage. "Right now I'm looking at you and I can't
believe, you don't know, oh oh!" He pointed at me again, the camera phones are now
pointing at my face.
"You don't know you're beautiful, oh oh! That's what makes you beautiful." He
dropped the mic then jumped down from the stage.
"Okay. I have to go na," I said before running away.
***
"Salazar! Wait!" I heard him calling me but I didn't stop. I continued walking
fast. Shit. That was really, really embarrassing. What was he thinking?
"Hey, wait up!" he said when he grabbed a hold of my arm, making me stop and turn
to look at him.
I raised both hands in surrender. "With that stunt you pulled off, it's okay na.
Whatever you did, I'm over it already."
His face scrunched. "Apparently you got over me too."
My eyes widened. Where did that come from? "Whoa there. Dude, there was nothing to
get over YOU."
His frown deepened. "I'm just a 'dude' now?"
I scoffed at his face. "You've always been a 'dude' to me. We're friends, right?" I
looked away from him and noticed that people are staring. "Are we seriously talking
about this in here? In the middle of Megamall?"
But looks like he didn't hear me. "Friends? Friends don't kiss, Salazar."
I fought the urge to groan. Why can't he just drop this?
"Friends kiss," I said, my chip up.
"No. They don't." He leaned closer. "There's friendly kiss then there's French
kiss," he said with a low voice. I took a step back. He's too near!
I swallowed the lump on my throat. "Fine. You're right. I don't French kiss my
friends. But I don't know about you," I said, implying his flirting tendencies.
"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked with a scowl.
Ugh. He really doesn't know why I'm mad at him. "You know what, I'm okay now.
Really. I accept your grand gesture. I forgive you."
I pulled my arm away from his hold. "And now, if you'll excuse me..."
"We're not done talking," he said before grabbing my arm again.
I pulled my arm again. Tangina. Bakit ang kulit mo, Ongpauco? "Well, I am," I
hissed at him.
He sighed. "What did I do? Tell me so I could fix this," he said, sounding like
he's pleading.
"I told you, okay na," I said. I know all of these are just his moves to get in my
pants. That's the only reason I could come up why he's still pursuing me.
He leaned close again. "There was something going on between us, Salazar. I know
you felt that too. You wouldn't be like this if I didn't hurt you. So tell me, what
did I do?" he asked, his voice dangerously low. My walls immediately raised. What a
player. I must say he has really smooth moves.
I stepped back again. "You did nothing, okay? Not a thing," I said, my face void of
emotions.
His grip tightened on my arm. "I won't let you leave. Stop lying."
I looked at his eyes and saw his determination and stubbornness. Fine. I'll tell
him nang matapos na to!
"Fine. I saw you at The Ledge at the Sem-Ender."
"And then? Why didn't you approach me?"he asked, confused.
"That was the plan but you were busy," I said, carefully choosing my words.
"Busy? Busy doing wha-shit. You saw the girl sitting on my lap." Yeah. Right after
you texted me you were looking for me all night. What a liar.
"Yup," I answered with a careless shrug.
He dropped my arm and raked his hair with his hand, a sign of frustration. "Look, I
know this sounds bullshit but she just fell off my lap."
I rolled my eyes. C'mon! If that isn't a lame excuse, then I don't know what is.
"You were whispering to her ear," I supplied. Baka he forget that part.
"I was asking her to get off my lap, nicely." He winced when he realized how that
sounded.
I rolled my eyes. Kade doesn't do 'nice'. He's a freaking asshole by nature. "She
was giggling."
"She was shitfaced," he countered immediately.

"Your hands were in her waist," I said, the image vivid in my head. That irritating
hyena on his lap. I shook my head in disgust.
"I was pushing her by the waist, gently." Again, I call bullshit. He was never
gentle with me.
He heaved a huge sigh. "Do you really think I'll touch her waist if I'm trying to
cop a feel? I was pushing her away gently. She's drunk. What do you want me to do?
Shove her? She would've landed face first!"
Well, that's not my problem. "Whatever. I'm leaving now." I turned my back on him
and started walking away.
I stopped when I heard him call my name. Ano na naman ba? I waited but I dodn't
look back. "Will I still be your fake boyfriend at the Halloween Party?" he asked,
his voice sounded desperate.
I shrugged. "I'm still your date. I don't back down on a dare." But after that,
wala na talaga.
***
I rolled my eyes as I stared at Asher's new text message.

From: Asher Flores
Girl, unblock mo na daw siya.
Read: 11:16PM
I was about to drop my phone when it pinged again. There was a notification from
Twitter.
@TheOngpaucoRiver: Help me talk to your friend? @LouisseSalazar @KimTalavera_
Will you look at that. Another Ongpauco stirring shit...
=================
Chapter 12: Halloween Party
Chapter 12
Halloween Party
Ten Months Ago...

From: Papa
Are you not going to answer my calls?
Hindi ka ba uuwi dito?
I squeezed my eyes shut after reading Papa's text message. I have been avoiding
their calls and texts. I just need more time before I face them. I need time to
gather the courage to talk to them. It's not that easy to forget na your parents
lied to you about something big. Something big na pwedeng makasira sa'yo....
Especially to your freaking sanity.
That's why I was shitfaced and hangover when I came into my International Law class
two months ago. I danced on top of a table, drank myself stupid and wept in my car
the whole night... My world just fell apart.
Thank God for my best friends, K &J. To Asher and to Kade, they kind of made me
forget even though wala silang alam on what happened. Hell, they didn't even know I
fell apart. They were the perfect distractions.
I don't tell anyone about my problems lalo na if I know the people around me would
try to help. Lalo na if the problem wouldn't be solved ever. I just keep it inside
until I explode.
Another text appeared on my phone's screen. It wasn't from Papa.
Speaking of distractions...
From: Asher Flores

I know I'm asking for too much but can you babysit with me?
I sighed.
When will he stop? Tell him I can't, I replied.
From: Asher Flores
Diyos ko, Lorddddddd. High school levels lang? Pass the message?
Unblock him already!
Nope.
I grabbed the remote and slumped on the couch. I flipped through the channels until
my phone pinged again.
From: Asher Flores
We're going to a costume party for kids.
I can't watch them over alone.

*SAMAHAN MO NA BAKLA KA!!!*
I shook my head. Minsan talaga Asher is really childish.
Why don't you ask your cousins instead? I replied, ignoring Asher's suggestion.
From: Asher Flores
Ozi and Bay want you. They miss Cookie Monster.
I groaned. How can I say no to those two?
UGH. Fine. Ash, ask him where do I meet them? And what time?
From: Asher Flores
Hindi ako unli! Mauubos load ko ,mga leche!
Bahala na! I'm gonna unblock him na. But after tonight, wala na talaga. I'm gonna
block him again. Maybe I'm gonna change my number na rin.
When and where? I texted him.
Seconds later, his reply came. Wow. That was fast.
Thank
fuck. We'll pick you up in an hr.
Shit! Hindi man lang ako makakapagprepare? What an asshole.
Thank you, Salazar.
I sighed in defeat. Why me, Lord? Why me?

***
"Baby, you wight up my word yak nobody ews!" Ozi sang at the top of her lungs on
the backseat. "Da way da you fwip yow hayer gez me owverwelm!"
"But when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell," Bay sang too. But she's
calmer than her little sis.
"You don know, oh oh! You don know yow byutafooool!"Ozi screamed as she pointed at
me.
I chuckled as they continued to sing at the backseat. I chanced a peek at their

ahia and saw him blushing. His neck and the tip of his right ear were red!
I smirked. He must've remember his epic fail grand gesture last Saturday.
I heard him clear his throat. "Just so you know," he whispered. "The karaoke thing?
That was Asher's idea." I saw him white-knuckle the steering wheel. "I went with it
thinking you'd like it. I won't listen to Asher's advice anymore. That's for sure,"
he rambled.
I just shook my head. Iba talaga when a guy's ego was bruised. He'll make up
excuses for what he did.
"Whatever you say, Ongpauco."
He sighed again. "You're killing me here, Salazar."

"I'm not doing anything," I said, my face blank. What's his deal?
"Exactly," he grumbled. Good God. What does he want from me? I kept my mouth shut
until we
reached Ozi and Bay's daycare center.
Ozi went as Sofia the First while Bay went as Amber, Sofia's step-sister. They're
both too cute for words! Their costumes were really pretty, pinaghandaan talaga.
"Achi Wuwis, Ahia said you're gonna go to Hawoween party wayter. What's yow
coshume?" Ozi asked as I unbuckled her on her car seat. I looked up and saw Kade
unbuckling Bay too.
"Ahia, I can do it na," Bay whispered at him, embarrassed.
Kade chuckled. "Nope. Ahia's gonna do this until you're thirty." I rolled my eyes.
Something tells me na when these two grow up and date, they'll gonna need to ask
permission to Kade first.
"Achi Wuwis! Stop stawing at ahia!" Ozi said as she hold my cheeks with her little
hands. She maneuvered my face so I could look at her.
I swear I can hear Kade snicker. Asshole. Feelingero.
"Yes, we're going to a Halloween party later. I can't tell you what my costume is.
It's a surprise for your ahia," I said with a smile.
Ozi's eyes widened. "Why?"
Because I'm gonna give your older brother his Halloween blue-balls. But you don't
need to know that. I just winked at her and took her out of the car.
"Tease," I heard Kade grumbled as we walked towards the daycare center.

"Asshole," I said under my breath.
Good thing the two kiddos were talking to each other. They don't need to hear what
out filthy mouths were saying.
***
Two full Jack-O-Lanter baskets later...
The kiddos
were knocked-down after two-freaking-hours of Treat or Tricking. And in those two

hours, they were in sugar-high. I understand now why Kade wanted to have someone to
babysit with him. Babysitting those two were too much work. They're too hyper! But
at the same time they're fun to be with naman.
I forgot my troubles and I feel like a kid when I'm with them. No worries. No
problems. Kaso there's Kade naman, the annoyingly-sweet big brother. Just seeing
him with them makes me wanna change my mind. If he's like this to his little
sisters, protective, sweet and loyal, maybe he's not really an asshole.
But I can't trust myself to open up again. What if... he's just like that kasi he's
practically raising them? Pero with the girls his age, the girls he's attracted
to... they're all fair-game.
Ugh. Why am I thinking about these things? I'm done na. I'm done na with him,
right? Right?
"So... What time will I pick you up later?" Kade asked when we reached our
apartment building.
I looked back and saw the girls sleeping, their heads lolling. I chuckled. Pagod na
pagod sila. I looked back and him and noticed the faint smile on his lips. God, he
might be an asshole but he's a hot asshole.
"No need to pick me up. I'm going with my best friends." I looked away from him and
opened the door. I was about to jump out of his car when he called my name.
"What?" I looked back.
"Thank you for coming with us, Salazar." He smiled at me.
I nodded and forced a smile. "It's no biggie. I like your baby sisters," I said
with a shrug.
"Just my baby sisters?" he teased.
I rolled my eyes before I jumped out of the car. I was about to step into the
building when I heard him call me again. I looked back and waited.
"See you later, fake girlfriend," he shouted with a smirk before the car window
rolled up. I watched his car speed off before I went inside the building.
Fake girlfriend my ass.
***
"Let's do this!" Kim said as she dragged Jamie and I towards The Ledge's entrance.
The moment we stepped inside, I immediately looked at her reaction. This should be
fun.
Her mouth was agape as she looked around the room. This is a college Halloween
Party. What did she expect?
I chuckled as she covered her eyes. "Censored!" she squealed.
It was true. Some of the girls here wore skimpy and slutty clothes. There were VS
Models wannabes, Playboy bunnies and other clichéd sexy costumed girl. Sexy nurses,
slutty doctors, policewomen in skimpy uniform. Grabe.
My sexy angel costume looked conservative compared to them. I shook my head.

"C'mon, girls! Let's join them!"I said as I grabbed their arms. We were about to
step into the dancefloor when Kade's cousin, or should I say Peter Pan, blocked our
way.
"Hello, ladies!" he greeted us. I was about to shove him when a hand grabbed my
arm. I looked at it's owner and saw my fake boyfriend.
"Its show time, Salazar," he said when he dragged me to the dancefloor. Shit! I
hope Kim and Jamie were too distracted to see us!
"You couldn't wait? I just got here with my friends!" I hissed at him.
He smirked at me as he took my arms and wrapped it on his wide shoulders. I mean,

really wide shoulders. Wait, what the heck?
"That's your costume?" I asked in disbelief. "Could you be more of a cliché,

Ongpauco?"
He flashed me his boyish grin. "I didn't have the time to get one. My uniform will
do." He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me to him. "I was busy buying
Ozi and Bay's costumes."
Ughhhhh. Why? Why is he like that? He could freaking win an award for being the
best damn brother! And I hate it that it somehow thaws my ice-cold walls.
"I like your costume, too, Salazar. Glad you took my advice," he said, his eyes
raked my whole body. I feel like my white tube dress tightened around my body. And
the wings, his hands were tracing its feathers. This is so weird.
"Are you drunk already?" I asked in irritation.
He shook his head. "Thanks for the concern, babe. But I'm good." Did he just called
me 'babe?!' Before I could punch his pretty face, he started talking again. "Before
I forgot, I need you to talk to someone to clarify things," he said before breaking
away from me. He took my hand and intertwined his fingers with mine.
Holy hell. He's really taking advantage of this fake relationship tonight.
He dragged me towards the entrance of the VIP area where two bouncers were with
some girl. She looked scared
shitless.
"Ah! Ara! Here's my girl, Salazar. Tell her everything that happened at the Sem-
Ender party," Kade told her when we reached her.
I tensed. Shit. Si Hyena Girl.
She looked at Kade, her eyes scared. I looked back at Kade and saw him looking at
me. "Listen to her, Salazar."
"I-It was an accident!" Hyena Girl stuttered. I arched a brow as I listen to her
blabber. "I fell on Kade's lap kasi I was so drunk. I should've stood up! I'm so
sorry! I didn't know he has a girlfriend! I should've stood up when he asked me to!
I'm-I thought he's just playing hard-to-get. I was so drunk I thought he's flirting
with me when he's pushing me away na pala." She looked at Kade. "Can I go now?" she
asked.
Kade just gave her a nod. She ran away immediately.
"So, you believe me now?" Kade asked as he stirred me away from the bouncers.
I shook my head no.
"Why not? You just heard the truth straight from her," he said, his brows furrowed.
"She was scared that's why she said it was her fault. Malay ko ba if you threatened
her or something," I said, my eyes rolling. "Maybe she said those things because
she was pressured and intimidated."
Kade sighed. "I can't win with you, Salazar."
"Just give up already," I said with a shrug.
"Tsk. Never."
Shit. I heard that word again!
"C'mon! I wanna dance with my girlfriend," he said when he grabbed my hand and
dragged me to the dancefloor. Seriously? Is he gonna drag me the whole frigging
night?
And I'm nit his girlfriend! I'm
just his FAKE girlfriend for the night!
"Fake girlfriend, Ongpauco," I reminded him.
"Just humor me, okay?" he said with a smirk.

"No. I need a drink," I said before leaving him on the dancefloor. I went straight
at the bar and ordered my shots.
"You want body shots?" I shivered when I felt Kade's breath fanned on my nape. His
hands find my hips and he squeezed them.
I moved away from him and drank the shot in front of me. The tequila burned my
throat and I felt it smoothly lined my insides.
"Shit, Salazar. No lemon or salt? That's hot." I rolled my eyes. He took one of my
shots and drank them. "C'mon, I have a surprise pa. I hope you'll forgive me
already after this." He dragged me again.
"I haven't paid my shots!" I said as we tread the crowded bar. Shit! I'm in heels!
"That's taken care of!" I rolled my eyes. How could I forget they owned this bar?
As we reached his truck at The Ledge's parking lot, I get a feeling na I won't like
what he's about to do. I hate surprises, especially if it's from him. That epic-
fail karaoke will be forever etched on my head. Some girls would've fainted or at
the very least get kilig. But not me.
HE MURDERED THE FREAKING SONG! He didn't give One Direction justice! It felt like
he was mocking the lads. But not really. Ugh. I don't know na.
Basta what he did didn't make me like
him again.
Whoa there, Louisse. Shut up already. Stop talking to your brain, you psycho!
He opened the backseat and shoved me inside. "What the hell, Ongpauco?" I hissed at
him.
"Just come out after you take them!" he said and went away from the door.
Huh. That's weird.
I was about to open his car when I felt something on my butt. I'm sitting on
something. I took it and saw that they were three rectangular-shaped gifts. All
wrapped in a pink gift wrapped with pink ribbons. This is so freaking girly.
I read the cards.
I almost died buying these. - KO
You make me crazy, you know that? -KO
Forgive me? Yes or No? - KO
I sighed. Why can't he just drop it? Maybe I should tell him na I'm done with this
shit after tonight? Maybe he'll stop if I say it to his face.
I ripped the gift wrappers. I didn't get to see what the gifts were because it was
dark inside his car. But I know they were hardbound books. I had to open the lights
pa so I could see the covers and their titles. I looked down on his gifts and...
gasped.
WHAT THE HELL?!
One Direction
Take Me Home - Limited Edition
Yearbook
100% OFFICIAL
1D
WHERE WE ARE
our bands, our story
100% OFFICIAL
1D
DARE TO DREAM LIFE AS ONE DIRECTION

"You done, Salazar?" I heard him from outside. I didn't answer. I'm too choked up
to answer. "Yes or No?" I heard him ask. I looked at him and saw him at the window.
Do I forgive him? God. After all the shit he went through just to swoon me with
that fail karaoke and buying these books... I know I had to really forgive him.
Something nags me that he won't stop until he wears me out.
I sigh as I hug my new books. "Yes, I forgive you," I answered. Kade's face broke
into huge grin.
Forgiving doesn't necessarily mean I will forget everything. I didn't tell him
that, though.
=================
Chapter 13: Stranded
Chapter 13
Stranded
Ten Months Ago...
My mood was as gloomy as the sky today. Almost all of the students milling around
the hallway gave me a wide berth when they saw my face. They're kind of used to
seeing my usually resting-bitch-face. But not today. Halata yatang I'm on a foul
mood and they don't wanna get on my way. My pokerface was failing me today.
I felt my phone vibrated on my pocket. I gritted my teeth and continued walking.

Why would they call na naman? I texted them already. Was that not enough? I asked
them-politely-to give me more time and space. They thought two months were enough.
But not for me.
I just can't... I know two months of avoiding my parents was shitty. But knowing
that everything you have known for your whole life was a lie... it's just hard to
accept. I don't even know if it had really sunk in.
When I got inside the library, I immediately calmed down. The smell of books and
the silence that only a library can give you did that to me. But today, the library
was extra quiet and a bit eerie.
I just shrugged it off, though. I really need to do my research and finish my

papers. Gah, the first week of second semester just started last week and we're
already swamped with paper works .I just hope I could survive this week.
Honestly, I think this semester will kick my ass. Aside from the stress from
looking where to apply for my OJT, I have no friends in all of my classes. Asher
didn't enroll because she's gonna leave
for Myanmar next week. She might come back next year pa.
And that asshole Ongpauco. I kind of miss him, actually. We're not classmates din
this sem. But I think that's a good thing. I won't get to see him and that meant my
plans for staying away from him will be easier.
Tama na nga. I really need to focus now. I need to finish this paper today.
***
I was sitting at the farthest corner of the library where there's no windows or
anything that could distract me. I sighed and the hairs on the back of my neck when
I heard my sigh echoed. Am I really the only in here? From my four hour stay here,
I haven't seen a single person. Kahit librarians or janitors.
I startled when my phone vibrated on my pocket for the nth time. Normally, I would
check immediately. But today, I couldn't care less. Kahit na emergency pa yon. I
decided to only check my phone when I already finished my research.
After cleaning up my things and putting them inside my bag, I finally took my phone
out of my pocket. My eyes widened when I saw the number of missed calls and unread
texts.
Holy tacos!
13 missed calls from River Ongpauco.
15 missed calls from Jamie Navarro.
18 missed calls from Kimberly Joy Talavera.
21 missed calls from Cascade Ongpauco.
What the actual fuck?!
My phone started vibrating again. I immediately answered it when I saw Kade's

name on the screen.
"Yeah? What's going on?"
"Where are you?" he immediately asked, not answering my question.
I looked around. "I'm at the library. Why?" I whispered, realizing that I was still
at the library.
"At the uni?" he bellowed. I pulled the phone away from my ear. "What the hell,
Salazar? The classes were already suspended! What are you still doing there?" I
heard him continued to bellow.
Good God. Ang init ng ulo ha! "Edi I'm gonna go home na!" I hissed. Big deal ba?
Our apartment was just in front of the uni.
I heard him muttered expletives. "Your roommates were freaking the fuck out and
you're still in school? You should've been home three hours ago. There's a fucking
supertyphoon!" Oh. Shit. I didn't know. I didn't have the time to watch the news
earlier. "Stay there. I'm gonna get you."
I huffed. "No. I can leave on my own," I said. If I wait for him, baka mas lalong
mag-panic sina Jamie. Speaking of Jamie, I need to call them na. "Thanks for your
concern, though. I'm gonna hung up now. Bye," I said before ending the call.
Just as I was about to tap Jamie's name, my phone died. Shit. Kakatawag nila my
phone's battery died!
I put my phone back on my pocket and carried my bag na. I left the library
immediately. I scratched my head. If there's a suspension of classes, why did no
one look at the library? Bakit walang nag-lock ng library para no student would
enter na? Grrr. Stupid school employees.
And
stupid me for not watching the news and answering their calls.
***
Oh, my gods.
Water world. I'm in a water world. Shit.
I looked around everywhere and all I could see is... water. I wasn't able to reach
the first floor because it's already flooded. I think hanggang chest ko na yung
water. There's no way in hell na susulong ako diyan. Shit. There's no way in hell
na makakauwi ako!
My knees buckled at the realization. I'm fucking stranded here at the middle of the
staircase. There's no way I'm gonna get home now. My phone's battery was drained
and mukhang walang tao na sa building na to. At kung may roaming guard pa rin, I
bet they're not in here. Maybe I'm all alone here at the uni.
I sat down on the stairs. Two steps na lang, maaabutan na rin ako ng water. Fuck.
What did I get myself into?
I closed my eyes when I felt my the sting on my eyes. I'm not gonna cry. I'm gonna
survive this. I'm just stranded. Hindi naman ako nalunod, I'm not even wet. I'm not
dead.
I did the sign of the cross and whispered my prayer."Lord, please save me."
"Salazar!!!"
I jumped on my seat and opened my eyes. Did I imagine his voice? I know it's Kade!
I craned my neck and saw him wading slowly through the water. Shit! Sumulong siya
sa tubig-baha!
"Oh my gods, Kade!" I blurted as I watched him walked towards me. His hands raised,
holding his gym-bag above his head. I noticed the water was up to his chest.
Hanggang chin ko na siguro yung water!
"Are you okay?" he asked, worry etched on his face. Guilt rose inside me. Shit,
here I am... dry and safe up here while he's down there, wet and wading through
dirty water. I can only imagine kung anong klaseng toxic nandyan sa baha.
"I'm okay na. Just get in here carefully! There's a comfort room on the second
floor, you could clean up there," I told him as I stood up.
"Good. Go to the third floor and wait for me there," he said as he carefully
climbed up the stairs."Find a safe place where we could stay." I nodded and did as
I was told. I was so relieved I just couldn't give a shit that he ordered me to do
something.
***
"Salazar?" I heard his voice and his footsteps getting closer.
"I'm up here at the stairs lang," I said. I was hugging my knees close to my chest
and my chin was resting on them.
I got freaked out when I saw the library. The windows were shattered on the floor.
Pumasok na yung malakas na ulan and its cold harsh winds. The whole place was wet.
The books were soaked.
I just chose the stairs. It's more accessible and there's no windows around here.
We will remain safe and dry here.
I saw him rounded the corner of the stairs and slowly walked up to me. "You okay?"
he asked. I nodded as I took note that he's changed his clothes. Mabuti na lang he
has spare clean clothes on his gym-bag. Maybe he came from his training pa.
He sat down beside me. "You scared the shit out of me, you know that?" he said with
a sigh.
I sighed too. "I'm sorry," I said. I feel more shitty for not answering their
calls. Sinulong niya pa yung baha just so he could find my stubborn ass. I'm such a
jerk talaga sometimes.
He shrugged. "Don't worry about it. At least we're safe in here." He scratched the
back of his head. "The only problem is, the rain won't probably stop until tomorrow
afternoon. It's a supertyphoon."
My eyes widened. Fuck. We're doomed. "We don't have any food."
"I have two snickers, one energy drink and one bottled water," he said with a
slight grin. I sighed. At least we have something to eat and drink.
"Are you gonna share them with me?" I asked just to make sure.
He frowned. "Of course." He took his gym-bag and fished for something. "My phone's
dead."
"So is mine."
We both got silent for a full minute. Thinking... dreading the possibilities. I
know I won't gonna die here. But I just can't help but freak out.
"What are we gonna do now?" I asked as I bit on the nail of my thumb.

He sighed. "We just wait."
"For what? For someone to rescue us?" He nodded. I started to panic. "There's no
electricity! Pano if abutin tayo ng gabi dito?" I like to think of myself as
fearless, the kind of person that could outrun a zombie or slay many dragons. Pero
when it comes to darkness and this catastrophic shit... I honestly don't know if I
could freaking deal.
"We don't have a choice, Salazar." I know that. I squeezed my eyes shut and buried
my face on my knees."Don't worry. I won't let anything bad happen to you, okay?" he
said. I felt his lips against my hair and his arms circling around my tensed
shoulders.
I hope to the gods what he said was true.
=================
Chapter 14: Distract Me
Chapter 14
Distract Me
Ten Months Ago...
"I can't believe I'm saying this pero I think there's a greater chance na mamatay
ako sa boredom kesa sa baha," I whined, slumped on the floor and my back leaning on
the wall. Gods, I'm being dramatic. Who wouldn't be? We're stranded for more than
an hour now.
"I hear ya," Kade said as he put his wet clothes on the banister. Good thing, there
was still a water supply earlier. Kade had the chance to really clean up. He also
said that the first thing he's gonna do after this disaster, is to call their
family doctor.
I agreed. Mahirap na.
"No phone, no music, limited food and drinks," I groaned. "You know that restless
feeling and you can't act on it because there's nothing to do? I hate that." And I
hate it that I sounded like a whinny bitch. But I can't help it.
Kade sat in front of me. "But we can't do anything about it. We'll just get tired,
hungry and thirsty."
I sighed. I know that. We can't afford to eat all of our limited food and drinks-
two bars of snickers, Gatorade and a bottled water. And there's really nothing to
do here. We're just at the end of a wet hallway, exactly at the top the staircase.
This is the only dry place here in the building. Even the library has been invaded
by the rain.
"I just wish this nightmare ends already," I said as I heaved a sigh.
Awkward silence.
"I hate awkward silence as much as I hate boredom," I whined again.
Kade
chuckled. "Then let's talk," he said as he sat up straight.
I frowned. "Talk about what?"
He shrugged. "Anything? Just so we could get rid of this awkward silence and
boredom. Let's distract each other."
Oh, boy. I hope he's not talking about the kind of distraction that popped into my
head.
"Okaaay," I nodded as I dragged the word. "Umm, I really hate the weather now?" I
started reluctantly.
Kade burst into laughter. "I can't believe you're gonna start it with weather
talk."
I rolled my eyes. "Oh, ikaw na magaling. You start." Gosh. Asher's brashness really
had rubbed off on me.
"How about we talk about each others' first?" Kade suggested with a naughty grin.
"How original," I deadpanned.
"Oh, ikaw na magaling. You start," he said, throwing my own words back at me. I
glared at him for a minute.
Ugh. "Fine! But let's keep it clean."
"Where's the fun in that?" he asked, his brows rose to his hairline. "First kiss?"
I sighed. "Freshman year. James Singson. Awful kisser." Up until now, I still
regret giving him my first kiss. He's cute naman. But he's just real sloppy. I
hated myself after that encounter. I avoided him at all cost. "You?"
"7th grade. Ashley Tan. Smack," he answered with a grin. I rolled my eyes. He's
like 12 years old pa nun.
"First heartbreak?" I asked.
"Family problem," he said with a
forced smile.
"Same," I sighed. I guess both of us won't go to that topic.
"First relationship?" he asked suddenly.

"Believe it or not, I'm an NBSB," I said with a smirk.
"You're kidding," he deadpanned. I rolled my eyes before shaking my head no. "Just
a string of flings?"
I nodded. "You could say that. You?"
"Ashley Tan. 7th grade. Clingy girlfriend," he said as he picked up an invisible

lint on his track pants.
"Ohh. Did your relationship with her last long?" I asked out of sheer curiosity.
Kade grinned. "Nah. We 'dated' for a week." My eyes widened. A week? My gods. His
reputation really preceeds him. What an ass.
"First rule you broke?" he asked.
I can't remember. But it was probably about me staying up late and reading Harry
Potter. "Staying up late. I know, lame."
"I sneaked out of my bed room window when I was 6, I think," he said, answering his
own question.
At the age of six? What was he thinking? "Why did you sneak out? Where did you go?"
"I've hated my dad since I was kid. I remember I packed up my shit and tried to
leave. My mom caught me, though." I was gonna ask pa but he interrupted me. "Let's
make this more interesting... I don't wanna talk about our firsts anymore."
Me, too. Mahirap na, baka we get to dangerous topics pa. "What are you thinking
now?" I asked.
I noticed the mischief twinkling in his eyes. "Let's just ask each other anything.
But
we have to answer each question as honestly."
"I'm good with that." I shrugged. "Hmmm... Birthday and age?"
"August 28, 1991. 22. You?"
"May 7, 1993. 20."
"Cup size?" he asked with a perfectly innocent face.
I choked on my own spit. "What the hell?" Kade burst into laughter. I punched his
shoulder. "I won't answer that question, asshole!"
"Fine. I guess I'm just gonna see it for myself," he said, giving me a heated look.
Good lord.
"Don't you dare!" I glared at him. He flashed me a boyish grin and raised both of
his hands in surrender.
Kailangan kong makaganti. I need to get him flustered too.
"How long is your dick?" I challenged him with an arched brow.
"8 inches," he answered without hesitating.
Well, that escalated quickly.
I huffed. "I call bullshit. You're part Chinese. You're just about 4 inches." It's
a fact. I've read a thorough research about it out of curiosity. And that's just
impossible! 8 inches? Really? Kalokohan!
He scowled. "Yeah. My dick is 4 inches...when it's flaccid." He flashed me his
infamous half-smile half-smirk. "I'm 6'3, Salazar. What do you expect? I'm hung
like a horse."
I snorted. "God, you're shameless," I said, shaking my head in disbelief.
"What's your favorite sexual position?" he asked again with an innocent expression.
I burst into laughter. What's with him? "What the hell, Ongpauco? Are you really
that horny?"
"Answer the damn question, Salazar," he said, the half-smile half-smirk still
placed on his lips.
"You're unbelievable!" I sputtered. How am I gonna answer that question? I haven't

even got into third base with anyone!
He leaned closer, his face only inches away from me. "Chicken shit!" he whispered.
I shoved his face away. "I'm still a virgin, you idiot!" I blurted without thinkng.
His eyes widened. "For real?"
What? Do I look like a slut? I know I have the reputation but that's just it. "Hey,
that's kind of insulting!" I said, shoving his face again.
"No... I mean, wow. You're... wow." He leaned back in surprise and in...awe.
"Cascade Ongpauco? Speechless? Today really must be the end of the world."
"You're like a unicorn to me now," he said with a teasing smile. I was gonna tease
him on his unicorn reference when loud explosion of thunder rumbled. I jumped on my
seat and screamed. Holy shit!
"Come over here. Stay close with me," he said, tugging my hand. I resisted at
first.
"Promise me you won't grope my boobs," I said, my voice wavering.
He frowned, insulted. "Why the hell would I do that?"
"You just asked earlier what my cup size is!"
"I was just kiding!" Instead of tugging me to his side, Kade moved closer to me and
sat near the wall. "Let's just talk about... uhh clean stuff for now."
"Where's the fun in that?" I said, throwing his own words in his face.
He sighed in defeat. "I don't know what to ask you anymore. All I can think about
is the
word 'virgin.'"
I punched his shoulder. "I'm really tempted to drown you right now. It would be a
perfect crime."
He shook his head. "Nope, it's not."
***
"Aha! I'll put an odorless and tasteless chemical in your energy drink. When you
drink it, you wouldn't even know you're drinking poison." We were still arguing
about the perfect crime and it had really been fun. Aside from I get to use
Criminal Minds reference, I really enjoy Kade talking, debating... basically on his
element.
He rolled his eyes. "But it'll still be traced by the toxicologists on the victim's
body."
"Fine. I'll just hire someone to hypnotize you to kill yourself," I said,
remembering that one episode on CSI:NY.
Kade heaved a huge sigh. "How many times do I have to tell you, Salazar? The victim
doesn't have to be me. Can't you think of somebody else to kill?" he asked,
exasperated.
"How about Ara? Remember the girl sitting in your lap at the sem-ender party?" I
asked, my tone sarcastic.
Kade chuckled. "You're hot when you're jealous, you know," he said, his lips near
on my ear.
"I'm not jealous."
"Ahh. Kaya pala you ignored me for weeks," he deadpanned.
I ignored it. "The perfect crime, Ongpauco," I said, reminding him of our little
game.
"Allergic reaction," he simply said. I looked at him, confused. "Do you have
allergies?"
"I'm allergic to garlic," I answered. When I eat one, even a tiny a bit, my throat
would close up. Sometimes, I'll just wake up in the ER... Oh. I get it now.
"I see you got it now." I can hear the smirk in his voice. "I'll put minced garlic
on your pizza. Minutes later, you're dead from choking."
"And it could be ruled out as an accident," I said with frown. "You do realize you
have an unfair advantage, right? You're a PolSci major, for Christ's sakes," I
grumbled.
"And just like any other college student, you have studied the basic laws. You
probably memorized the Philippine constitution before. You have no excuse,
Salazar," he said, his tone smug. He just beat me into our little game.
"Anyway, speaking of PolSci... What are your plans after you graduate?" I asked,
changing the topic.
"Law school," he said. I noticed his voice lowered for a bit.
"I'm sensing a 'but' there," I said.
"My asshole of a father doesn't want me to pursue it. He wants me to run the
company since I'm his first-born son." He sighed. "You know, the Chinese shit and
stuff."
"Wait... Diba you're the only guy lang naman? Don't tell me may iba pa?" I asked,
wide-eyed. "There's a second family pa?"
"Shit."
"Oopsss."
I heard him sigh. "I'm gonna tell you about it some other time."
"You'd be surprised how similar the shitty issues of our families," I
said, somehow getting what he's not saying.
I heard him clear his throat. "How about you? What are you plans after graduation?
What are your dreams, Salazar?"
"Hmm... I wanna take a year off, honestly." I bit my lower lip. I know Papa won't
let me. I haven't told them about it. "But I don't know... Maybe I'll take a
master's degree program. I'm still not sure."
"Dreams?" he pushed.
I closed my eyes and leaned back on the wall. "I want to travel the world. It's
obvious naman on my degree program, right?" I said with a smile. I really, really
want to travel the world on my own. I want to learn about new cultures, new
languages, new values, everything.
I opened my eyes and startled. My eyes widened when I realized how dark our
surrounding was. Shit. "Hey, are you alright?" I didn't answer. "Salazar, you're
shaking..." I heard his voice near me now.
I squeezed my eyes shut. "It's so dark, Kade." I released a shaky breath. "I-I'm
fucking scared. Please, d-distract me," I stuttered. Fuck, this is so humiliating!
His arms-his whole body circled around me. I felt his hand gently pushed my head
into his neck. "Just try to breathe slowly, okay?"
I nodded, my eyes still squeezed shut.
"Okay. I know you hate my singing voice. But you just gonna suck it up for now,
okay?" he asked. It made me giggle nervously. Shit. I don't giggle. Ever. He didn't
seem to notice though because he continued on babbling. "I usually do this to Ozi
when she's scared," he explained. I just nodded.
He was quiet for a minute before I heard him clear his throat.
"Put your head on my shoulder..." he started. I sighed as I felt my body relax.

"Hold me in your arms, baby." The vibration of his voice on his chest helped on
soothing my frayed nerves.
"Squeeze me oh so tight." I found myself wrapping my arms around his torso. His
voice didn't falter even though I felt him stilled. "Show me that you love me too."
When I said that he murdered What Makes Me Beautiful, I was really just
exaggerating. I was just overprotective of my lads. Pero his voice was soothing
talaga. For a big guy, his voice sounded really, really good.
"Put your lips next to mine, dear," I felt his lips grazed on my forehead. "Won't
you kiss me once, baby."
I didn't expect it at that time kaya siguro din I was blown off. Not to mention,
that experience was humiliating... kaya I thought of his whole performance as
horrendous.
I sighed. "Just a kiss goodnight, maybe you and I will fall in love."
But now? His voice lulls me to sleep.
"Salazar?" I heard him call my name. I didn't answer.
"If we survive this... I don't want us to be just friends, okay?" he whispered.
Me, too, Ongpauco.
=================
Chapter 15: Cajucom
Chapter 15
Cajucom
Present Time...
With his chin placed on his hand, my date asked "So, what happened next?"
I sighed. "Really? You want me to continue?" I asked, baffled. He just grinned and
I rolled my eyes. "You know what, for someone who hated Kade more than I do; you
sure are nosey about his past relationship."
Andrew snorted. "Just humor me," he mumbled.

I stared at him. Tama nga si Jamie. She and Kim really knew what my type was.
Tall? Check. He's 6 feet tall. Damn it.
Chinito? Check. He's half-Chinese and half-Filipino.
Athlete? Check. He was Gray Wolves' alternate quarterback for three years.
Sense of humor? Check. He's really funny and sarcastic, just the way I like it.
"C'mon now. Don't make me wait." I snapped back to reality when he waved his hand
in my face.
I rolled my eyes. "This is probably the weirdest first date ever," I muttered. "I
mean, why are you so damn curious about my relationship with Kade?"
He leaned closer and flashed me his boyish grin. "Because I wanna help you out. And
for me to successfully do that, I need to know everything."
I just stared at him. Help me? Help me with what? "I don't need your help," I
scoffed.
His boyish grin didn't waver. "Yet you're here with me," he said with confidence na
I don't know saan niya hinuhugot.
I felt my cheeks heat up. As if naman na I'd go on a freaking blind date na walang
sapilitan. "My friends forced me into this." And I'm starting to regret this now.
"And what's in it for you naman?" I asked,
irritated.
He shrugged as he leaned back on his chair. "I like making his life a living hell."
"Why?"
His grin widened. "Because it's fun."
"Seriously, Andrew."
He leaned closer, his elbows placed on the table. "Louisse, when you agreed to go
on a date with me I presume you know that Kade and I are rivals, right?" he asked,
his face turned serious.
My brows furrowed. He's too frank! "Uhh, no." I don't wanna tell him that I know
that bit of information dahil kila J, K and Lake.
He appeared surprised. "Really? Well, that's that. We're rivals. I like watching
him lose."
I shook my head. There's no point naman and it's a waste of time. He has a new
girlfriend, for God's sakes! "You do realize that he's moved on, right?" I asked,
my tone sarcastic.
"Lake said you're smart. Guess his wrong," he said with a smirk.
"What did you just say?" I sputtered. Fuck. I know what an insult when I hear one!
AND THAT'S A FUCKING INSULT! Gago to ah?
He waved off my outburst. "Look, you can't be that stupid. It's pretty obvious.
He's still in love with you and God forbid, you're still in love with him too." He
said, looking like he's disgusted. "If I can see it with my own eyes, why can't
you? You guys obviously knew each other more than anyone else."
I shook my head and stood up from my seat. "We're just wasting our time here."
He didn't moved an inch from his seat. "You're still in love with him, right?" he
asked with a curious expression. I was about to answer when he stopped me. "No,
don't answer that. Do you want him back?" I just stared
at him. "I can make that happen if you say yes, Louisse."
I sighed and sat down. "How?"
"Answer me first." He didn't budge.
I shook my head. "God, you're annoying," I groaned.
"I'm waiting..." he sing-songed.
I growled. "Fine. I want him back. But I want him to crawl his way back to me." If
that happens, if he really came back to me... I want him to grovel and I want him
to work for it. Yes, gusto ko talaga siyang pahirapan.
"You want him to suffer, first?" he asked with an amused expression. I nodded.
"We'll make it happen, Louisse. Deal?" he asked, his head tilted to the side.
"Deal," I said with a sigh. Why do I feel like I just sold my soul to the devil?
"Okay. You may now continue. What happened after the supertyphoon?" Andrew asked as
he rubbed his palms.
I shrugged and gave him a lame answer. "The usual couple activities... we hanged-
out on our favorite spot, dared and had bets against each other, had a lot of make-
out sessions, we did anything and everything... only in secret."
"Why is that?"
"Let's just say I have issues." I looked at my nails and flicked off the invisible
dirt on my nails.
"Daddy issues?"
"You have no idea," I said with a mirthless laugh.
"I got time. You can tell me everything..." he muttered before sipping on his
drink. I stared at him hard. He's hot. I mean, just look at him... A normal girl
would've expired on the spot. You can see his defined biceps with his white polo
shirt. And he's corded neck, I don't know why I find it sexy. His clean cut also
helps. He looked so... clean.
shook my head. "Dude, seriously. Do you get off by gossiping?" I said with a
disgusted expression.
He chuckled. "No. But you gotta admit. This date is fucking boring. It only became
less boring when we started talking about our exes."
"True..." Well, he's right. Our date was boring talaga. When he started asking
about exes, we started to actually enjoy each others' company.
Andrew covered his mouth when he yawned. "Please continue now, Louisse. I'm
starting to get sleepy."
"Asshole." I sighed as I leaned back on my chair. "Fine... Before the flood

subsided..."
***
Ten Months ago...
For someone who waded through flood, Kade really smelled so frigging good. Of
course, he cleaned up at the bathroom earlier but he smelled so fresh. Parang hindi
nabahiran ng dirty water.
I sniffed his neck. Oh, God. I'm such a creeper.
I stilled when Kade's arms tightened around me. "You done sniffing me, Salazar?" he
asked, his voice low and husky from disuse.
"I did not sniff you," I said as I tried to sit up straight. His arms didn't budge
and I was just stuck there sitting between his thick, muscled thighs.
"Whatever makes you sleep at night, babe," he said as he burried his nose on my
nape.
I was about to rip him a new one when my stomach grumbled... loudly.
I heard and felt him chuckle behind me. I felt my face heat up.
Ugh. Earth, please swallow me now.
Kade moved away from me and grabbed his gym bag beside him. He took one bar of
snickers and passed it to
me. "Eat your snickers. What do you prefer, Gatorade or water?" I pointed the water
when he showed me the two options.
"Question," Kade said as he watched me tear the snickers' wrapper. I just nodded.
"Did you hear me last night?" he asked.
I stopped for a while then continued on unwrapping my breakfast. "You said a lot of
things last night," I said, nonchalant.
He sighed. I felt his warm breath on my neck. It made me shiver. "You're really
gonna make this hard for me, huh?" he asked.
"I don't know what you're talking about," I said before taking a huge bite on my
snickers bar.
"Bullshit," he said immediately. I whipped mu head back and glared at him. He

flashed me his boyish grin. "When I told you I didn't want us to remain just as
friends, I heard you whisper that you didn't want it too."
My eyes widened. "You did?" Shit. I was thinking out loud pala nun? That's just so
embarrassing!
"Yep," he said with a shit-eating grin.
I blinked twice before I could construct a response. A lame response. "So what
now?" I asked.
Kade leaned closer, his nose almost touching mine. "Wanna go on a date with me,
Salazar?" I just stared at him. Wow. His eyes were kind of grayish brown. "C'mon,
babe. Put me out of misery, please," he said with a pout.
Cascade Ongpauco, pouting. I cannot...
"Okay."
***
Present Time...
"And then? Where did you go? How did it go?" Andrew asked rapidly.
I smirked at him. "You gossipmonger, you."
He chortled. "Tsk. Just answer the damn questions."
I rolled my eyes at him. "We went to Subic. He made me ride his Ducati
Streetfighter while wearing a dress. What a douche, right?"
"Not really." He chuckled. "You know, you've been calling him a jerk, a douchebag
and an asshole. But so far, he treated you differently naman."
"Remember our debate? He acted like a smug bastard. And every time I asked him to
piss off, he'd go above and beyond to piss me off instead."
"He's a guy," Andrew deadpanned.
"Would you do that to the girl you like?" I countered, brow arched.
He shrugged with a smug expression. "I don't usually have to do anything to get a
girl. They throw themselves at me."
I sighed. "I'm sorry to burst your bubble, but you're not that hot," I lied. He
already has huge ego. He doesn't need me to stroke it pa for him.
He scoffed. Something from my back caught his attention. I noticed his jaw clenched
in irritation. I was about to look back at look at what caught his attention when
he leaned closer. "Don't look back. Kade just stepped inside the resto. He's with
his girl."
I tensed.
He's with his girl.
That was me before.
"Relax, babe. You're tensed." He winked. I breathed in deeply then faked a smile.
"Let the games begin," he whispered as he looked back at them.
This is a bad idea.

=================
Chapter 16: Helmet
Chapter 16
Helmet
Present Time...
"Do we really have to hold hands?" I asked Andrew as I tried to pull my hand away
from him. He smirked as he tightened his hold. What an ass.
"Just play along, will ya?" he said. "Do you want us to get busted right away?" he
added, his eyes twinkling with mischief.
I glared at him. "I'm uncomfortable, you ass!" I hissed.
"Arte," he scoffed. "Just do as I say. Trust me, if he sees us all-lovey-dovey and

shit... he'll fucking explode," he said while playing with my hand. I just
continued glaring at him. "You know what, you should continue na. I wanna hear
about your first date."
I looked at him, disgusted. "You are such girl. In fact, you're more tsismosa than
my girl friends."
Andrew burst out laughing. I dug my fingernails on his hand. "And you're not boring
naman pala."
My jaw dropped. "I'm fucking boring?" I sputtered.
"At first, I thought you were boring. I was wrong, okay," he clarified. "You gotta
admit, it was awkward when we started talking. You always gave one-word answers.
Boring, right?" He was right. We can't even keep a conversation. Nagkasundo lang
talaga kami sa pag-uusap about ex just like what he said earlier.
I guess that's our common thing. We're both hung-up with our exes. Andrew said his
ex, Mariana Enslie, told him she needed to focus on her modeling career. Only to
find out she's now a 'side-bitch' of a big-shot photographer.
Our love lives are so saklap.
"C'mon, you need to continue with your epic-fail love story with Ongpauco.
I need to feel normal. Stroke my ego, babe," he said with a devilish grin.
I rolled my eyes. Stroke my ego, my ass. He must be really comfortable with me now
that he's dropping sexual innuendos.
"Fine," I conceded. He won't stop unless I start talking. "I'll tell you na what
happened on our first date," I said, my eyes carefully roaming around the resto.
Mahirap na, I might look straight into the asshole's eyes.
***
Ten Months ago...
I walked paced around my room. I put my right hand on the left part of my chest. I
can feel heart beating so hard and fast. Ano ba? Is this palpitation? This is bad,
right?
I stopped in front of the mirror and looked at my reflection. Hmm... Braided hair?
It's not messy naman. Make-up? Flawless. Brows? They're on fleek. Brown suede
boots? It's bagay naman with my gray dress. The hemline of my dress was not exactly
what I expected, though.It was way shorter than the last time I wore it. Tumangkad
ba ako or my dress had shrunk?
I jumped when my phone vibrated on my hand. I immediately read the text message
from Kade.
Make sure to bring a swimsuit.
My eyes almost popped out of it sockets. WHAT THE HECK?!
I replied. Are you for real? Swimming on first day?!
Also pack an overnight bag.
Fucking fuck. He wanted me to spend the night with him? For our first date?
Are you out of your mind?!

Nope. I'll pick you up in 30.
WHAT?! He expected me to pack for 30 minutes? I need more time to pack no! I need
to carefully curate my clothes even though it's only for one night. He's not just a
guy na makikita akong naka-bikini.
He's... He's the guy that I'm dating!
Oh, gods. This whole dating thing is so not my thing. I'm like a fish out of water.
I don't know what to do.
Maybe I should calm down first.
And then, freak out on his ass.
***
"YOU'RE OUT OF YOUR GODDAMNED MIND!" I shouted at Kade when I saw him in front of
our apartment building, straddling his motorcycle bike.
"Scared, Salazar?" he asked as he stepped down on his bike.
"I'm not scared, Ongpauco. I'm furious!" My father was once a part of an elite
motorcycle club in Cavite. Most of my ninongs are bikers. I basically grew up
riding motorcycle bikes with them. And no, they're not bad people. Some of them are
really... 'elite.'
"You want me to ride that bike wearing this dress?" I sputtered. "Is it so hard to
give a heads up?"
Kade sauntered towards me and took my overnight bike. He swung it to his shoulder.
He looked down with a smirk on his face. "You wearing shorts underneath?" he asked
in a low voice.
"Yeah, of course." I never wear a skirt or a dress without black cycling shorts
underneath. Mahirap na no. Dyahe.
Kade's
smirk didn't waver. "Then, I dare you to ride on it."
My jaw dropped. "You're seriously making me question myself. Why did I ever agree
with this date?" I asked more to myself. I heard him laugh before he enveloped me
with his arms.
"You can change clothes. I'll wait for you here," he suggested before kissing me on
the forehead. I closed my eyes and breathed his perfume. He smelled so damn good.
I shook my head. If he thought I'm gonna change my clothes, he's clearly mistaken.
I'm not about to back down on a dare, no matter how stupid this is. No one would
see my face naman with the helmet, right? "No, I'm not gonna back down on this
ridiculously dare of yours."
Kade pulled me away from him and I saw him frowning down at me. "I was just
kidding. Go, change now."
I shook my head. "Sakay na!" I said as I made him face his bike. He just grunted as
he arranged my overnight bag on the back of his bike. After that, he helped me wear
the extra helmet. I was just staring at him the whole time.
I can't believe he's... Kind of like mine.
His hooded brown eyes were piercing me through the face shield. "You ready?" he
asked as he locked the straps under my chin. I just nodded.
He tapped the top of my helmet first before he mounted on his bike. When it was my
turn, medyo mabagal because I'm wearing a dress nga.
"Damn," Kade said. I frowned at him. He shook his head, his eyes downcast. "Your
legs are really exposed."
I looked down on my legs. Oops. No
one will see us naman diba? No one will recognize us because of our helmets. I
resisted the urge to groan. Why do I have to take his bait? Pwede naman akong mag
back-down sa dare na yun because it's really ridiculous naman.
But that's just how I am wired. I love challenges, dares and bets. I'm an
adrenaline junkie and I really crave for adventures. Good thing is, Kade's like
that too. I just hope it's a good thing that we're too much a like.
***
The ride was... interesting.
I must say Kade really must have planned this date. The ride pa lang. Pinag-isipan
talaga. Kasi for two hours, my front was plastered against his back. Kapag
humihinto kapag may naabutan kaming traffic or if we stopped on a red light, he
would drop his large hands on my legs. I think it's more of covering my exposed
legs than 'tsansing.'
I just got a little nervous because the roads passed by were familiar. Nadaanan pa
nga namin yung subdivision namin. We're in Cavite and I think we're going somewhere
south pa.
We stopped in front of a beach house. My jaw dropped. Fuck. Dinala niya ako sa
isang beach house for our first date? What? I didn't expect na yung gated community
na pinasukan namin will gonna have this kind of view! Beach houses. And fuck, the
white sand beach.
And theirs were the most low-key looking. Bungalow type but it was still huge.
Typical Ongpaucos.
"You're taking me in a beach house?" I asked as he helped me dismount his bike.
He followed me and took off his helmet immediately.
"Yup. Got a problem with that?"
I tried to unsnap the straps under my chin but to no avail. Kade snapped my hands
away and did it quickly. How did he do that?
"In case you forgot, this is our first date," I reminded him. "I thought we're
going to the movies, then wine and dine and shit," I said, confused.
Kade scoffed. "I am not that boring and you know it." He pointed his bike. "I asked
you to bring an overnight bag. Does that scream boring first date to you?" he asked
before going back to his bike, taking our bags. He then motioned me to follow him
to the beach house.
"We're gonna have an all-nighter! That's not exactly a first date kind of activity,
you know," I argued as I followed him. "I mean, what are we gonna do later? Don't
tell me this is a trap!"
I heard him chuckle as he unlocked the front door. "Get your mind off the gutter,
Salazar." He dropped our bags at the couch.
"That's our room," he pointed at my left. "Kitchen's that way." He pointed behind
me. "You know what, I'll tour you later. You need to change into swimwear na. Let's
not waste our time. We need to eat then swim, yeah?"
I felt a little light-headed. He was like a drill sergeant. Didn't he know I don't
like being ordered to?
He must've seen the irritation in my face when he smiled and walked towards me. He
held my face with both of his hands. "C'mon now, babe. Please? Please change your
clothes now? So we can swim then eat. Please, baby?" he asked with a mischievous
grin.
Kailangan talaga na he calls me babe or baby? Fuck. I'm fucked.
I tried to glare at him but failed miserably. "Fine. Just make sure there's pizza.
"Don't worry," he said, his face getting closer. I shoved his face with both hands.
"I don't kiss on first dates," I said before taking my bag on the couch and going
straight to our room.
I heard him sigh before I closed the bedroom door.
1 point, Salazar.
***
Present Time...
"And then what?" Andrew asked as he played with my hand. He was just playing with
my hand the whole time I was reminiscing about my first date with Kade.
I shrugged. "After I changed, we ate and talked. We played GTA for two hours. After
that, we went to the beach." I smiled at the memory. "We attacked each other with
water guns and water balloon bombs."
"And you guys did spend the night together?" he asked while wiggling his brows.
I rolled my eyes. He's such a guy. "Yes. We slept under the stars."
Andrew was taken aback. "He brought you to a beach house and both of you opted to
sleep at the shore?" he asked, confused. "Why?" he added.
I chuckled. "I don't know. I guess we both passed out while stargazing."
"You guys weren't attacked by anyone while sleeping? Or got cold sleeping there out
in the open?"
I rolled my eyes. "There was a bonfire, Andrew. We also brought blankets that
time."
He shook his head. "You're both weird," he muttered. "After that? Did he follow
your 'no-kissing rule?'" he asked.
He had to ask talaga! Andrew smirked when he saw my face. I can feel my ears and
cheeks heating up! "He did kiss you!"
I groaned. He didn't. There was no kiss shared between us that night and the
morning after that. Not for the lack of trying in his part. I just rejected him
anytime he asks for one. And when the moment I wanted him to kiss me. He just
smirked and sped off the road! Leaving me in front of our apartment building,
wanting and out-witted!
See? He's a douchebag!
But that's not the humiliating part!
I was still wearing his helmet! And I only realized it when I was in my room na!
When I saw my reflection in the mirror!
Ugh. Dyahe.
I was about to open my mouth when I noticed someone standing beside our table. I
looked up and saw Kade. His attention fixed on our table. I followed where his eyes
trained and saw it was in our intertwined hands.
"Hey, man. What's up?" Andrew asked Kade without a beat.
Kade's frown deepened. "You know each other?" His eyes snapped to mine. I just
nodded.
"Is there a problem?" Andrew asked. Kade's eyes snapped to Andrew and they just
stared at each other. Para bang there's a silent conversation with their eyes. The
tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife.
Kade was about to say something when the fucking hyena of a girlfriend he has
showed up out of nowhere. "Hey, honey! Why are you here?" she asked him with her
irritating high-pitched, pa-cute voice. Kade didn't answer her.
Her eyes caught mine. She blanched. Huh. That was weird.
"Hello, Louisse. It was nice to see you again," she said with a forced smile. What
a fake bitch. I don't know why she's acting like this when she didn't care to
filter her words against us when we were in Davao for River's birthday.
I just gave her a single nod. I'm not gonna exchange pleasantries with her. The
only diplomatic thing I could do to her right now is a single nod.
"We better get back to our table," Kade finally said to us. "It was nice seeing you
again, Salazar," he said with his eyes trained on my and Andrew's intertwined
hands. "C'mon, Sabrina." He then dragged the bitch out of the resto.
Huh. They just left? I thought they're going back to their table?
I felt Andrew's hand pulled away from mine. I looked at him and saw him flashing a
shit-eating grin. "See? It's effective!" he exclaimed. "He looked like someone just
kicked his puppy!" Andrew burst out laughing.
Yeah. He looked like shit.
And it didn't feel good they way I thought it would be. The satisfaction I felt
lasted only for a good one hour. Then there's that kurot in my chest. I want him to
suffer just like how I did. Pero bakit ganun?
I was right; this was not a good idea. But Andrew was also right. It was
effective. Fuck. I don't know anymore. I just want him back. Even if, my ego tells
me to just let him go.
=================
Chapter 17: First Vlog, First Date
Chapter 17
First Vlog, First Date
Present Time...
It has been three hours since Andrew dropped me off home after our first non-date.
I was just slumped on my bed, staring at the ceiling and trying my hardest not to
over-analyze our tensed encounter with Kade and his bitch of a girlfriend.
I mean, yes, what we did would really tick him off. Especially, I'm his ex and
Andrew's his rival. Pero kailangan niya ba talagang pumunta sa table namin just to
square off with Andrew? Not to mention, nandun yung girlfriend niyang hyena-
looking?
Tapos he had the gall to walk out of the resto. I mean, what the hell, right?
Ugh. I'm starting to over-think na naman.
My phone rang, signaling a Facetime call. I pulled it out of my jeans and looked it
up.
Asher Flores would like to Facetime...
I answered it. "What?" I asked in a bored tone just to tease her.
Asher's face appeared on the screen. Her face beaming. "Sungit naman! May period?"
Asher snickered.
I rolled my eyes. "What's up? Napatawag ka?" I asked as I sat up and find a
comfortable position while lying on my bed.
"How's your first blind date?" she asked with a huge hopeful grin.
I sighed.
Asher's grin disappeared. "That bad?" She huffed. "Akala ko ba, alam nang BFFs mo
yung type mo? Bakit mukhang waley?"
I shook my head. "It's not a blind date. Yes, I don't know him, but I knew of him.
Ganun din siya sa akin." I twisted my lips to the side. "He's Kade's rival.
"OMG. Kade's rival! Shit ka! Bakit hindi mo kinukwento
ng buo!" she yelled, frustrated. "Tsaka anong iniisip ng BFFs mo bakit yun pa? May
hidden agenda ba kayo?" she asked, her eyes squinted.
I was about to respond when she started talking again. "Girl, hindi healthy yan ha!
Masama manggamit para pagselosin yung ex mo ha!" She shook her head. "Kaninong idea
yan ha?"
"Not mine," I said defensively.
"Alam mo, kung meron lang talagang chance at napakilala mo ako sa best friends mo
at naging friends ko din sila... naku! Baka nakatikim na sila sakin." I felt the
guilt creep in as soon the words left her mouth. Asher noticed it. She sighed.
"Naiintindihan ko naman yung dahilan kung bakit ayaw mo akong ipakilala sa kanila
nuon. But don't you think its high time na ipakilala mo na ako? I mean, alam na
nila yung tungkol kay Kade. Bakit tinatago mo pa rin ako?"
Now the guilt felt like a lead sitting on the pit of my stomach. "They still don't
know some things..." I said warily. They thought I told them everything but the
truth is... I still held back. The reason why I didn't want them to know Asher is
because, as shitty as it is, she's the strongest link from my pre break-up-Kade
life.
"Like what? Ano pang tinatago mo sa best friends mo?" I didn't answer. She narrowed
her eyes at me. "Alam ba nilang siya ang nakukaha ng vir-"
"Nope," I said, interrupting her on purpose. "Hindi rin nila alam about my parents'
secret ... I also didn't tell them na naging kami talaga ni Kade, okay?"
Asher's jaw dropped. "Gaga ka ba?!" she asked after she recovered from her shock.
"Bakit di mo sinabi sa kanila? Ano na lang iniisip nila ngayon na brokenhearted ka
kay
Kade? Na momolmates lang kayo tas walang commitment? Shunga mo lang teh!"
"What do you want me to say to them? The truth? That I couldn't keep a relationship
with guy I loved? That it didn't even last a week?" I exploded. I just can't tell
them everything!
Asher rolled her eyes. "Alam ko na... Pride mo na naman umiiral!" She leaned closer
at her camera. "Best friends mo sila, Louisse. Hindi ka nila ija-judge." She sighed
in exasperation. "Tignan mo nga, they even planned na pagselosin yung ex mo. They
stoop that low for you. They won't judge you!"
I squeezed my eyes shut. Alam ko naman yun. Those two have the biggest hearts. "You
know they call me, 'Mother Hen', right?" I asked and she nodded. "In our trio, I'm
the one who protects them. I'm the one who they turn to first if they have a last
minute fashion crisis, boy problems, everthing... I don't want them to see me weak,
okay?"
Asher's eyes softened. "Pero sa trio natin nila Kade, ikaw yung baby. I am the
'Mother Hen' and he's... the funny dirtbag." She gave me a sad smile. "Okay lang
sakin na hindi mo ako ipakilala sa kanila as long as may napapakitaan ka ng fragile
side mo."
"Thank you, Asher." The relief I felt almost smothered me.
She chuckled and waved it off. "Nakaka-miss kayo ni Kade. Ngayon ko lang kayo na-
miss ng ganito dahil magkahiwalay na kayo." Her face saddened again. "Naalala mo,
kahit na wala ako diyan sa Pinas, ako pa rin yung one and only shipper niyo, diba?
Ako nga lang yung allowed manuod ng private vlogs niyo diba? Ganun niyo ako ka-
spoiled." And the heart-squeezing thing is back. It just
really hurts when I let myself think about our past. Mas masakit. Super.
Because I had a hand in it.
"Yeah. You requested it e." The private vlogs were her idea. She demanded us to
give her updates about the progress of our relationship bago siya umalis. I said na
it's a crazy idea and we can't do it because of our hectic schedules for our last
sem in the uni.
"You should watch it, you know. Para ma-realize mo kung ano yung tinaboy mo paalis
sa buhay mo," she said with teasing grin. If only it was that easy. But there were
too many unsettled issues between us. Let's not also forget the fact that he has a
girlfriend.
"Go fuck a duck, AshFlo," I told her. She scowled. She hates it whenever her
friends call her by her moniker. I don't care. Her jokes are shitty most of the
time.
"Ano nga ulit pangalan nung naka date mo kanina?" she asked, changing the subject.
"Nakalimutan ko siyang i-stalk nung binalitaan mo ko last week."
"Andrew Cajucom," I answered. The screen darkened and the word 'Pause' appeared.
Seconds later, Asher started squealing.
"Oh my God! Bakit ang popogi ng mga lalaking umaaligid sa inyo?" she asked. "Yung
totoo, members ba sila ng Laglag Panty Partylist? Tell me how to sign up!"
I burst into laughter. I was about to give her shit when a text's banner popped up
on my phone's screen. It's an unregistered number. But I think I know kanino galing
ang text na ito.
From: +6391633969**
Can we talk? Rooftop @ midnight.
There's only one person who would meet up with me in the rooftop at midnight.
"What? Anong meron?"
Asher asked, her voice alarmed. I saw my face at the screen and I looked horrified.
"I think Kade just texted me," I said, my voice sounded hollow. I don't know what
to feel about this.
"Are you sure?" she asked, her brows rose to her hairline. I shrugged. He's the
only one that I could think about na magte-text about a certain rooftop. But I
can't affirm it because no matter how much I love him, I didn't have the time to
memorize his number.
"Basahin mo sakin yung text tsaka yung number and I'll check dito sa phone ko kung
Kade nga yun." I did as I was ask.
"It's him," she said, her nose scrunched.
"Shit... Holy shit." I think I'm at the verge of flipping the fuck out. I'm hyper-
ventilating.
"Bakit kaya gusto ka niyang kausapin?"
"Holy tacos..." I wheezed.
"Girrrrl, kalma lang your tits!" she said, chuckling like it's no big fucking deal.
"I don't do calm, Asher. Alam mo yan!" Especially now that Kade texted me again
after three months of radio silence apart from the Davao thing... and the relapse.
Yes, I'm counting.
"What should I say to him? Do I even reply?" I asked as I panicked.
Asher shrugged. "Ewan ko! Ikaw, gusto mo bang makipagkita sa kanya at kausapin
siya?"
"The smart thing to do is to text him no. Or to not reply at all. But I'm fucking
curious." There's no point denying the obvious.
"Well... Meron ka pang four hours para mag-isip. I need to go na, may practice pa
ko. Balitaan mo na lang ako bukas kung magiging duwag ka later or not! Bye, bitch!"
And off she went.
Then a message popped up again.
From:
Asher Flores
Panuorin mo yung vlogs niyo while thinking.
Malay mo makatulong. ;)
Without thinking, I took my laptop and booted it up. I went to my Youtube channel
and looked for our first ever vlog. It was titled 'First Vlog, First Date'. I
sighed. I just told Andrew earlier about my first date with Kade, though I didn't
tell him everything, and now I'm gonna watch it again.
I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply. I opened it as I exhaled slowly. I clicked

the video and let it play out.
Here goes nothing...
***
Ten Months Ago...
"What are you thinking, Salazar?" Kade asked.I looked at him and made a face. My
gods. He's just eating damn pizza. Why does he have to look like an Abercrombie and
Fitch model?
I shrugged. I was thinking about Asher's request when we send her off yesterday.
"You think she'll get mad if we didn't do that stupid vlog she requested?" I asked
after I inhaled my pizza.
"Probably. So if you don't want her angry and distracted, we should make one." We
both know an angry and distracted Asher should take a backseat now that she's
practicing for the SEA Games.
I took a sip of my soda and wiped my mouth with a paper napkin. "What should we
record?"
"I have something in my mind but I doubt you'll like it," he said with a smirk. I
took the closest thing to me and threw it at him. He was hit in the head by a throw
pillow .Bull's eye.
"You're such a pig." He's such a pig sometimes. There's no way in hell I'm gonna
record something self-incriminating!
Kade
burst into laughter. "Get your mind off the gutter!"
"I won't make a sextape with you," I blurted out without thinking. That set Kade
off again. Oh my god. I'm such a dork.
"I wasn't thinking about sextapes," he said as he wiped the tears off his face.
Tinatawanan pa rin niya ako. I hate him! "I was gonna suggest we record our date."
I stood up and took my phone with me. "C'mon then! I'm done eating and playing GTA.
Let's go to the beach!" I said as I head out of his beach house. I heard him follow
me.
I opened my phone and tapped the camera icon. I saw my face and his behind me. I
tapped the record button. "Hi, Asher! Kade and I are on our first date and we
decided to make a vlog just like what you requested. I hope you won't get
disappointed by how uneventful this day will be," I said with a grin.
Kade smirked at the camera. "I promise you it won't," he said. His arms circling
around my waist. I stiffened at the unexpected contact. "You're in for a ride,
Asher," he said to the camera as his lips brushed against my neck. I felt myself
heat up the moment his lips met the skin on my neck.
Oh, my gods.
I tapped the record button and looked back at him. "Do you really have to do that?"
I asked. He just grinned at me and tightened his arms around my waist. His warm
front made contact with my back. "I thought you won't kiss me until asked you to?"
I asked trying my hardest not to squirm
"Sorry. I got distracted when I got this close to you." He leaned closer and
nuzzled his nose against the slope of
my shoulder and neck. Fuck. Thank God this wasn't recorded. "That wasn't a kiss, by
the way."
"Ongpauco..." I said... more like moaned.
"C'mon, Salazar. Let's swim," he said before pulling away from me.
Good god, what a tease.
I didn't know what happened but he started running towards the beach. I had no
choice but to run after him. I watched him took his shirt off and dived into the
water. I waited for him to get back into surface.
And when he did, his hands were suspiciously under the water in front of him...
like he's doing something underwater.
Oh my fucking... I burst into laughter. Looks like I was not the only who got
heated.
"What?" he snapped.
"Nothing," I said, chuckling. It's not like it's the first time I saw a guy
adjusting his dick inside his board shorts. Who am I kidding? It's definitely a
first.
He raised his hand and did the come-hither gesture. Fuck it if I didn't find it
hot. Damn this guy. "Come here, babe," he said.
I'd like to think that I'm a strong woman, that a single term of endearment won't
make me lose my mind. But I did earlier, when he picked me up for our date. So to
compromise with my pride and dignity, I refused.
"Nah. I don't wanna swim yet," I said before I went back to the beach house. I hate
mind games but sometimes you have to play smart so you wouldn't get hurt easily.
***
"I told ya. This date is boring," I told Asher through my camera. I decided to
record another video again while Kade's still out. That
way he wouldn't hear me trash talk him.
I was just about to sit down on the couch when something cold and wet hit my back.
I whirled back and saw Kade holding a water gun. "Nobody says no to me," he said
with a devilish grin.
I screamed bloody murder when he started shooting my chest. I ran towards him. I
forgot that I wasn't the one who was playing football all my life, so I tackled
him. He was caught off guard and that was the only reason why I managed to tackle
him successfully.
I took the chance and sat on his abdomen. We both fought for the water gun. I had
to bite his arm para lang manalo. I know it's a cheap win but it was worth it. I
trained the water gun in his face and started shooting.
Too bad he's a football player. My victory was short-lived.
***
"This douchebag didn't tell me he prepared for a water fight," I told Asher, again
through the camera. "There was another water gun sitting on his porch and there
were drums filled with water balloon bombs too."
Kade chuckled beside me. "But you had fun, right?" he asked. I just glared at him.
He smirked. "The video doesn't lie," he said, referring to the video we
accidentally recorded. I forgot na I was taking one before he attacked me. My phone
fell to the couch and the camera was miraculously trained on us.
"Yes, I did," I said petulantly. I shivered when the cold air hit us. Kade pulled
me to his lap and wrapped his arms around me. Hindi yata enough yung bonfire in
front of us. Thank God for body heat.
After our water fight,
we dried up and changed our clothes. Kade made a bonfire and took out blankets. He
even brought our food outside. I wasn't informed that we'll be having a picnic
here.
I looked back at the camera. "He's really into me, you know." Kade squeezed my
hips, a warning. I didn't care. "See? He made me sit on his lap. Clingy much?"
He squeezed my waist again before he started tracing patterns on my skin with his
fingers. "I didn't hear you complain, Salazar."
He got me there. I can't think of a retort na rin because his hand on my waist was
distracting. Kade took the phone in my hand and stopped the recording.
"I have a question," he said as he put my phone down. I waited for him to continue.
"What was your first impression when you first saw me?"
That was a no-brainer. "I thought you were an asshole." Because he gloated when he
won that debate we had in our International Law subject last semester.
Kade chuckled. "Why am I not surprised?"

I shifted and looked back on him. "What was your first impression when you first
saw me?" I asked. Can't blame a girl for being curious.
"I was at a loss for words when I saw you," he said. I noticed the tips of his ears
were turning pink.
I scowled at him. He has got to be shitting me. "We were debating, Ongpauco. You
never faltered or stuttered when you were talking."
"Who says it was the first time I noticed you?" he asked with a grunt.
I rolled my eyes. Stupid. Oo nga naman. It was the middle of the first semester
nun. So maybe he noticed me in the classroom before. "Okay, fine. Continue with the
first impression."
"It was the night before the debate." I stiffened the moment the words left his
mouth. He noticed it and he loosened his hold on me. I eased off his lap and sat
facing him.
"Was it at The Ledge?" I asked, looking anywhere but him. I know what I did that
night and it's embarrassing that he saw me lose my shit. It was the night I found
out the truth about my family.
"You were dancing on the table top." I can't decipher his tone. But somehow I know
there was no malice in it. "You were dancing like nobody's watching. You were doing
the robotic dance, for fuck's sakes." He chuckled. My face heated up. I know. Table
dancing should be sexy or something, not awkward and weird. Yay me.
"And you were so damn pretty even if you were drenched with sweat." I cringe. No
wonder he noticed me. Para pala akong basang-sisiw that night. Ack. But at least I
was still pretty according to him.
"I watched you until you were done. I watched you the whole night." He looked away
from me and stared at the fire. "You were alone. I had to discreetly ward off the
fuckers who wanted you that night." Our eyes met and he was staring at me like he
really knew me. Like he knew something I don't. I hate it.
I gulped. "You didn't exactly tell me what your first impression with me was." He
shrugged. I scowled at him. "Tell me what you thought when you saw me!" I insisted.
"There was no first impression," he said. I arched a brow. "I just thought, 'She
might not know it yet but she will be mine."
=================
Chapter 18: Double Dare
Chapter 18
Double Dare
Nine Months Ago...
The moment I got inside my room, I dived face first on my bed. I just ate my
dinner. I already showered and did all my homework. I'm ready to get reacquainted
with my precious bed.
I'm so fucking tired. Can this sem just finish already? Or sana the Christmas break
starts na. Sunud-sunod yung hell weeks namin for this last sem. I've been working
my ass off on my internship at the Indonesian Embassy and at the same time, I'm
completing my requirements for graduation this early. Mahirap na. There's no time
to play or to sleep. There's no time even for breathing!
I just wanna sleep so badly. But I have to wake-up early tomorrow for one of my
major subjects.
Gah.I can do this. This is the last semester and I will graduate on time. Sleep is
for the weak. I'll sleep when I'm dead.
I felt my phone vibrated on my pocket. I rolled over and took my phone out.
I miss your face.
I chuckled. Can't he just say he missed me and not just my face? I bit my lower lip
to stop myself from smiling. Fuck. Reading his text somehow made me feel less
stressed. Just one text from him, it kind of made my day.
Shit. This is bad.
Admit it. You miss the whole me.
I miss you.
Wow. That's easy. He didn't even tease me. What's the catch? What if walang catch?
What should I reply to his text? That I miss him too? There's
nothing wrong with it. We're dating. It's natural to miss him because it has been
almost two weeks since we last hang out.
I miss you, too. I replied before I lose my nerve.
I wanna see you now.
Facetime?
Nah.
What do you want? Let's meet in school tomorrow?

But I wanna be with you longer than that.
I bit my lower lip. Gosh. We rarely see each other in school and when we do, saglit
lang. Maybe that's not enough for him. It seems like he really missed me. That
makes me feel giddy. I missed him too. What should we do? We have early morning
classes and unlike last semester, we don't have much free time now.
But we have morning classes.
You know what, screw it.
I frowned after reading his last text. Screw it? What does that mean? Screw it,
ayaw na niya? Or 'screw' our classes tomorrow? Screw everything and let's meet?
What? I'm so confused.
I was about to reply when another text from him appeared on the screen.
Meet me in the parking lot.
My eyes widened. I guess that answered your question, L.
***
I was running towards his car and at the same time, I was filming it.
"Fourth vlog! Kade texted me ten minutes ago to meet him in the parking lot," I
said as I watched his car window lowered.
I waved at him when his head appeared. His grin was huge. He knew he's gonna get
shit from me.
Ang bilis ng oras. Yes, it was our fourth vlog na. The second one was the day after
our first date. It kind of didn't end well because he teased me about the helmet
thing all-day. As a revenge, hindi ko na sinauli yung helmet niya. Bahala siya.
The third vlog was the day when he dragged me into babysitting his little sisters
with him in his condo. It was fun! We had another tea party and we're all wearing
our costumes. Me as Cookie Monster and Kade as a Pink Fairy. We did another 1D
music video, it was the Little Things. Kade hated it pero he knows the lyrics
naman.
"Time check: 11:07 PM. I don't know what his plans are. May pasok pa kami bukas and
sobrang aga nun. He said screw it but both know that it's us who's gonna get
screwed tomorrow." I opened the car on the front passenger's side and slid inside.
"Hey, asshole," I greeted him with a grin.
"Hey, babe," he said to me. He then looked at my phone's camera. "Hey, Ash."
"So... What's going on?" I asked, still filming.
"Nothing. I just wanna see you."

"You saw me na. Can I go back to my apartment?"
"Nope."
"I need to go back na."
Kade shook his head. "You don't have a curfew."
"But I have to go. I don't wanna get caught sleeping in class."
"Then don't," he said with a shrug.
"Aren't you tired? Cause I am." And then a yawn escaped my mouth. "Don't get me
wrong, I missed you too. But
we have to think of our priorities first."I feel like I need to remind him we have
other priorities.
"Of course, I get tired-"
"See, you just admitted it! Go home! I'll see you tomorrow."
Kade frowned. "Fine. If you wanna go back to your apartment, then go," he said, his
tone irritated.
"You're mad."
"I'm not."
"Yes, you are."
"No, I'm not. Nakita na kita e," he said like it was no big deal. I was stunned.
"Well, that shut you up."
He unsnapped his seat belt and faced me. "Listen to me, Salazar. I know what my
priorities are and this hell week is already kicking my ass. I just need to see
your face to get through it." He showed me his boyish grin. "Yes, seeing you even
for ten or five minutes, hell, even for seconds... it's the best part of my day."
Holy shit.
I felt my cheeks heated up. "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you're just
stroking my ego," I said as I looked away from me.
"So what's it gonna be? Are you going back to your apartment or not?" I heard him
start the car's ignition.
"I don't know..." I said as I looked outside. Gabing-gabi na pero marami pa ring
tao sa labas.
"What if..." He stopped. I looked back and glared at him. He knows na ayaw ko ng
nabibitin. "What if I dare you to spend the whole night with me-"
"No," I said firmly.
"-on a rooadtrip."
"Going to where?"
"Does it matter?" he asked with a smirk. I shrugged. "You can double dare me if you
want to."
Double dare. He's basically asking me to dare him. So if he managed to succeed

doing the dare I asked him to do, I have to do the dare he asked before.
"Really?" I asked, doubtful. Sure talaga siyang sa akin siya nag-aask for a dare?
He nodded. "Umm, okay..." Hmmm... Anong mahirap na dare na he could possibly do but
it will be hard for him? I looked around his car. I spotted his water-proof
wristwatch. An idea popped into my head.
I smirked at him and he just raised an eyebrow. "I dare you to find a swimming pool
and swim in it without permission or paying."
"You just wanted to see me on my boxer briefs," he teased without missing a beat.
That didn't even cross my mind! I made a disgusted sound. "Who says I'm going with
you?"
"Me," he said as leaned forward.
I didn't budge even though his face was just inches away from me. "What are you
doing?"
His eyes were on my lips. "I'm gonna seal this double dare with a kiss." I just
stared at him.
Kade winked. "Just kidding," he said as I heard my seat belt snapped on its lock.
***
"We're gonna get caught," I sing-songed while looking at my phone's camera on the
dashboard. I'm positive we're gonna get caught. Kinakanta ko na lang yung kaba ko.
Kade thought it was a good idea to look for a swimming pool in an exclusive
subdivision here in Makati.
I don't even know how we entered the subdivision's main entrance. There were armed
guards, for Pete's sakes! And then, as soon as we got far from them, Kade turned
off the
headlights! I really feel like we're a criminal.
"And I'm gonna tell them it's your idea," Kade deadpanned.
I looked through the window as we passed by mansion after mansion. I don't know how
he'll gonna find one. Is he gonna break and enter? That's against the law! Shit!
We're really gonna get our asses reamed.
Parang nagbabago na yung isip ko. It's my dare yet it's me who wants to drop it.
"I think we should just-"
"There! I know there a pool in that house!" he said as killed the ignition. He
looked at me with a devilish smile. "Ready?" he asked.
My eyes widened. "I'm not gonna come with you!"

He unsnapped his seat belt. "Yes, you are! Who's gonna film it if you're not
there?"
"Edi ikaw! You have your own phone!"I said pointing at his phone on his lap.
"Don't start being a chickenshit now, Salazar," Kade looked at me with a disgusted
expression.
"I'm not!"
"Then get your ass out of my car," he said before jumping out of his car.
I growled before taking my phone on the dashboard. "You just had to take the bait,
L. You just had to," I said to myself as I opened the car door. I ran towards the
direction he went.
"What the hell are you doing?!" I hissed at Kade when I saw him climbing over the
wall.
Kade did the hush-gesture with his pointer finger pressed on his lips. "You're
gonna get us caught. Quit it!"
"You're a PolSci major, Ongpauco. You know you're trespassing!" Fuck. Even a grade
school student knows
this shit is illegal!
"Then you shouldn't have double dared me into this!" he hissed back before he
jumped
I squeezed my eyes shut. Fuck!I opened my eyes and looked around. Bahala na! I put
my phone in my shorts' pocket and started to climb over the wall.
I swear to God, I'm gonna dump him if we get caught.
The moment my feet hit the ground, my jaw hit the ground too. Kade was only wearing
his black boxer briefs. Oh my God, L. Don't ogle his washboard abs.
"I can think of another dare, you know," I told him as I pulled my phone out. Time
to record this.
He was stretching his arms and his back. Shit. He's really going to do this. He
looked back at me, his eyes filled with mischief. "Strip," he ordered.
I glared at him. "What? No!"
"Chickenshit!" he said before he dived into the pool.
"Oh my God. He did it!" I said aghast.
Seconds later, his head resurfaced. "C'mon! Let's leave!" I motioned for him to
come out of the pool.
He grinned at me as he floated on his back. "I will only leave if you get in here
with me."
"No!" I hissed.
"Ohhh. Louise Salazar is a fucking coward."

"I am not a coward!"
"Then, strip!"
Ugh! Buti na lang I shaved this earlier. I put my phone on the closest pool chair.
I breathed in deeply before pulled my shirt off. I unbuttoned and unzipped my
shorts. I shimmied out of it and placed my clothes on the pool chair.
Thank God for black boyshorts. Kung sinuot ko yung
skimpy underwear na binili sakin ni mama, Kade will see half of my butt cheeks.
Kaso lang, my black boyshorts doesn't match my pink bra. It was a gift from Jamie.
"Ito talaga yung gusto mong mangyari e," I grunted under my breath as I gathered
and tied my hair.
I heard Kade's chuckle. "You got me."
I planted my hands on my hips and then looked at him. "Perv," I said, glaring at
him.
He was checking me out shamelessly. You'd though he hasn't seen me wearing a bikini
before. Well, I was wearing shorts nun. Now, I'm just wearing my undies.
Kade did the universal manyak whistle. I flipped him off before I gently slipped
into the pool. I don't want to make a noise, unlike some people.
Wow. The pool's temp was just right kind of cool. Tama lang for a December weather.
Not too cold, not too warm. I swam towards Kade and tried to relax. We're here for
about 15 minutes and it looked like nobody's home naman. Hindi naman siguro kami
mahuhuli.
"You wanna stay pa?" Kade asked when I got close to him.
"I'll enjoy it muna tapos we'll leave na." We're here na rin naman na. Might as
well enjoy it, right?
We ended up staying for another hour. We swam and talked. Minsan he'll dunk me.
Akala mo he's not 200 pounds heavier than me.
"What's your deal-breaker?" Kade asked when he was in front of me. His hands were
on either side of my head, effectively trapping me into one of the pool's corner.
"My deal-breaker?" I repeated, my eyes on his wet lashes. Wow, they're long.
"Yup," he said as
he leaned closer.
And just like that, my brain had a short circuit.
Kade leaned closer. Our noses touched and his lips were mere centimeters away from
mine. I watched his eyes closed and I did the same. I felt his breath fanned my
lips when-
A shrill sound made us jump.
"Huwag kayong gagalaw! Trespassing kayo!" someone shouted.

I froze on the spot. But Kade pulled himself and me out of the pool. He ran towards
our clothes and picked them up. He came back to me and pulled my hand. "Run!" he
yelled as he dragged me to the nearest opened gate. He even sent one guard flying.
Kade pushed him when he blocked us on our way out.
I don't know how we got into his car. I was freaking out the whole time because the
guards were following us. I thought we managed to escape them when we got through
the subdivision's main exit. But boy was I wrong.
They were still chasing us and we're in EDSA na! We're causing a major traffic pa
because of the chase.
"OH MY GOD! We're going to prison wearing only our undies!" I said, still freaking
out.
Kade burst out laughing. "No, we won't."
I punched his right arm. "Stop laughing! This is not funny!"
"It is!" he said. I was about to punch him again when he made a sharp turn. Thank
God I'm seat belt on.
We're no longer in EDSA and he's driving like a mad man. I bet he's breaking the
speed limit, kung nasaan man kami. Holy tacos! We've done illegal things in just
one night! Trespassing, assault, refusing to submit to arrest,
breaking the speed limit... ano pa?
I jolted back to reality when I noticed the car has stopped completely. "I thought
the racer in your family was River only," I said, breathing hard. I looked around
and panic started to rose. Shit. I hate dark places!
"Who do you think River competed with when he was just an amateur?" I heard Kade
asked. I was still looking at our surroundings. All I can see was black, black,
black. His car's headlights were still turned off.
I looked back at him. "Where are we?"
"We're in an abandoned parking lot building," he said with a shrug.
"WHAT?!" I freaked out even more when I heard the word 'abandoned'.
Kade grabbed my hands in case I was gonna punch him again. "Hey, easy! We'll leave
when the coast is clear, alright?"
"Easy?! Kade, you know I hate dark places!" I said, wide-eyed. Shit. I must've
looked crazy but I don't care. I'm scared shitless.
"But you will probably hate prison bars, right?" he asked calmly.
Goddammit. I hate it when he's right.
"Fine! Just distract me, okay?" I conceded. This scene is so freaking familiar. I
said to myself na I wouldn't get stranded again on any dark place. Ayoko na maulit
yung nangyari sa amin nung nagkaroon ng supertyphoon. Yet, here we are.
"Get dressed muna. I'll make a call lang," he said as he pointed at our clothes on
the dashboard. I took my shirt and put it on. Bahala na siya mabasa. I just placed
my shorts on my lap. Mahirap kayang mag-maneuver. Baka mas lalo pa akong masilipan.
"Hello,
dad. Yeah, it's Cascade," I heard him said to the other line. Why was he calling
his dad? "It was me. Tùi-put-tshù." Okay. What the hell did he just say? Was that
Mandarin? Hokkien?
His phone call with his dad ended quickly. "So, I have a confession to make," he
said when our eyes met. I just looked at him, waiting. "See that?" He pointed at
the windshield.
"I don't wanna look," I said, shaking my head.
He ignored what I said. "See that round sticker?" he asked, still pointing. I
looked at the upper right corner of the windshield. "It's a homeowner's sticker
from the subdivision we went to."
"And?" I asked. I'm too exhausted and still freaked out to think.
He sighed. "We didn't trespass, Salazar. It was our house."
"Wait, what?! You lied to me!" I yelled when I realized what he was saying. "You
made me believe-I fucking hate you!" I yelled at again him.
He burst out laughing. "You just dared me to find a pool and swim in it. I found
one at home."
I punched him on his chest. "You liar!"
"Is that your deal-breaker?" he asked, turning serious.
I nodded. "Yes. Lying AND cheating," I said, feeling like I need to put it out
there.
"Okay, I won't do it to you," he said with an indulgent smile.
"You just did!" I exploded.
"I didn't!" He shook his head.
I looked away from him. "Oh my God! You must think I'm so fucking stupid!" I said
more to my smile than him.
"No, you're not."
I raked my fingers through my hair."Yes, I am. God, I hate you," I groaned.
"I wouldn't fall for some stupid girl," Kade said quietly.
Everything in me stilled. My eyes widened and my jaw dropped. What?
I whipped my head back to him. "You're falling for me?!" I echoed.
"Yep. Crashed so hard, babe," he said with a smile.
If I was any other girl, I would've gushed or puked rainbows. But nah. I had to be
Louisse Salazar, the girl who questions everything. Paano? Bakit? Bakit ang bilis?
I know it's been four months but that's still too fast for me.
"Why?" I asked, confused.
"Exactly that," he said waving his hand at me.
***
Present Time...
I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply. This is for the best.
I opened my eyes and hit send on my phone.
To: Cascade Ongpauco
No.
=================
Chapter 19: Jinx
Chapter 19
Jinx
Please?
Without thinking, I deleted all of his text messages and blocked his number. Won't
he stop? Can he not take a hint? I'm not trying to be difficult. I just don't want
to talk to him anymore.
Watching those four vlogs made me realize my mistakes today. I shouldn't have
accepted Jamie's and Kim's help. I shouldn't have gone on a date with a guy I know
Kade hates. I shouldn't have agreed with Andrew to make Kade jealous. And I
shouldn't want him to crawl his way back to me.
It was all because of our deal-breakers.
We both hate liars and cheaters. I won't be one and I won't let him be one.
I don't want to manipulate him to talk to me just because he thought I was with
Andrew now. I hate schemes, manipulations and mind-games. They're just wrong. It's
just low and I won't stoop to that level again. I don't wanna be like that.
Say, he wanted us to back... How about his girlfriend? I know they're still
together as of now.
I just saw it on Facebook. Sabrina posted on his wall, telling him she loves him.
No matter how much I hated that bitch, I don't want to make Kade a cheater. He will
hate himself in the longer run.
What if he just wanted to talk? Why now? It's been what? More than 3 months? We had
a lot of chance to talk but why now? Why after seeing me with someone else?
Coincidence? Impossible.
What we had had run its course. I know this will sadden Asher but, our ship has
sailed. It's in past and it should stay there.
I should
accept that.
I should move on from that.
I have made up my mind.
I was done being the fickle-minded ex.
I was done with Cascade Ongpauco.
To: Andrew Cajucom
I changed my mind.
From: Andrew Cajucom
Boring.
***
Nine Months Ago...
Boring.
I chuckled at his reply. He was asking what I was doing now. I told him I was just
on my bed. Sick and dying. Turns out, if you stargazed and watched the sunrise in
an abandoned parking lot's rooftop without drying off, you'll get sick... and die.
Instead of only missing out my morning classes, I ended up being absent whole day.
Since I got home, my head was pounding so hard. I kept on sneezing like there's no
tomorrow. I checked my temp and it says I got 38 degrees Celcius. There's this
heavy feeling on my chest din. That one that becomes before the cough.
I'll be there in 30. With pizza.
You don't have to. My roomies are here. I replied.
I don't care.
Well, I do. Hindi ka nila pwedeng makita. Magtataka sila. They'll ask questions
that I'm not ready to answer.
They can't see you! I replied.
Why the fuck not?
I need to tread carefully. I don't want to bruise his ego or anything. Pero I don't
know what to tell him. And frankly, I don't wanna talk about this over a text
message.
I'm
not ready yet. I answered as honestly as I could.
We'll talk about it later.
I released. I expelled a huge sigh of relief. You'll have to enter through the fire
exit. It's in my window.
See you later. Meatlovers, okay?
Yup.
***
"Hey, Salazar." I startled when I heard his voice.
I looked at my bedroom window and saw Kade's smiling face. I waved for him to come
inside. He slid the two pizza boxes through the window first before he gingerly
climbed inside.
"The things I do for you," Kade grunted as he patted the dusts off his clothes.
"Thank you," I told him with a wobbly smile. I still feel weak.
Kade went straight to my bed and lied down beside. He put his arm under my neck. He
pulled me close to him and I snuggled close to him. Fuck. Bango.
"Are you okay, babe?" he asked. I shook my head. "I bought meds too, just in case."
"Thank you," I said against his chest. "I just took one before you came."
"You want your pizza?" he asked. His hand playing idly with my hair. I shook my
head. Yeah, shocker.
Kade sighed. "I'm sorry. I should've brought you home right away last night," he
said, frowning.
"Don't be sorry." I shook my head. "It was the craziest night of my life so far. No
regrets." I beamed at him. It was true. It was by far the craziest and most
unforgettable night of my life.
"I'm glad," he said with a smile. "We found
our spot, too." I nodded. The abandoned parking lot building was not that bad naman
pala. It's actually accessible to some of my favorite views. The Sunrise, the
stars, the city lights and maybe even the sunset. I'm not sure because I only got
to see the three sights last night.
Our spot was perf.
"So this is where the magic happen?" he asked as he patted my bed.
"Yep. You're not gonna get it here, though," I said without missing a beat.
Kade groaned. "Aww, man. That sucks." A vibrating sound made us stop. "Wait, you're
phone's vibrating." He reached out of my bedside table. "It says Asher wants to
Facetime. Accept ko?"
I nodded. "Sure."
Asher's face appeared on the screen. God, I miss her face. "Hi, Loui-uyy! Kade and
Louisse! Magkasama na naman kayo!" I cringed at Asher's voice. It was too loud.
"Tone it down, Asher. My girl is sick," Kade warned.
"Awww. Oh my God, I ship you guys so hard!" she squealed and clapped. She's like a
retarded seal.
I chuckled. Sira ulo talaga. "What's up? Why did you call, loser?" I asked, still
pressed against Kade's hard and mabangong chest.
Asher shrugged. "Wala. Itatanong ko lang sana kung anong gusto mong gift for
Christmas."
"Kahit ano! Pwede namang souvenir or trinkets from Myanmar na lang," I said. I like
to trinkets and souvenirs from other places e.
" Ikaw Kade, ano gusto mo?" she asked.
"I already got what I want."
Asher squealed.
I slapped Kade's chest. "Kagabi ka pa cheesy
ha!" I told him with a pitiful glare. Kade just grinned at me.
"OMG! Anong nangyari last night?" Asher asked.
I stuck my tongue out. "We did a vlog last night. I'll update it as soon as I'm
okay na."
"A'right. Pagaling ka!" she said with her mischievous smile. "I'm gonna let you
guys go. Don't use protections para ninang na ako pagbalik ko ha? Goodbye!"
And then dial tone.
"Well, that was awkward," I said.

"Understatement," Kade said chuckling.
Awkward silence.
"Do you not want to tell your friends about us?"
"It's not that I don't want to. I just don't know what to tell them," I said,
trying to make sense. "I mean, what are we exactly? Tayo na ba? You just admitted
last night that you're falling for me. But how about my feelings? I'm still not
there. But for some reason, I like you." It's true. I'm attracted to him and I
really, really like him. But I know myself. I want to know exactly what I feel for
someone before I jump into a relationship. It's always been like that to me. Kaya
nga NBSB ako. Because I was never sure. Ngayon lang medyo naiiba talaga yung
nararamdaman ko.
And I wanna treasure it.
"We can take it slow," Kade said after a while.
I sighed. It's not finished yet. I have to tell him something. "You have to know
something about me, Kade." I bit my lower lip. "It's weird," I said, I feel like I
need to say a disclaimer.
"What is it?" he asked.
"I believe in jinx," I said, my nose scrunching. His face didn't change.
He's waiting for something pa. I sighed again. "I don't want to jinx us, okay?"
Kade nodded and gave me a tight-lipped smile."Okay then. We'll go at your pace. No
pressure, babe." I know he's not really warming to the idea pero I know din na he
really won't pressure me into something that I wasn't ready for.
I feel like I need to stroke his ego or something. "You know what? You're the best
non-boyfriend ever," I said.
Kade smirked. "What can I say? I'm the fucking best."
I leaned in towards him and pouted my lips, silently asking for a silly peck. "You
sure?" he asked. I nodded. He smiled as he leaned towards me. Finally-
"Louisse Salazar! Help me, please! May fashion crisis ako!" We both jumped when we
heard Kim's voice and her loud knocks on my door. Shit!
"Oh my God! Hide in my closet!" I hissed at him. He groaned and rolled over my bed.
He jumped out of my bed and went to closet. I gingerly sat up and left my bed. I
went straight my closet. "I'm so sorry. I'll make her leave immediately."
"Take your time," he said as he touched my camisoles. I punched him on his chest
and he just raised his hands in surrender. I closed the closet doors in his face. I
went towards the pizza boxes and hid it under my bed.
I ran to my bedroom door and opened it. Kim immediately stepped inside.
"Tingin mo dapat mag heels ako or wag na?" she asked as she showed me a pair of
black flats and a pair rose-colored wedges.
"Where are you going ba?" I asked as I eyed her clothes. She was wearing
a white chiffon top and leather pants.
"Company party," she answered with a pout.
I made a disgusted face. "Find another pair. Hindi bagay pareho." Or find another
clothes.
"Pwede pahiram na lang sa'yo?" she asked as she went towards my closet. My eyes
widened. Kade's in there! Shit! We're gonna get caught!
Holy tacos! NO!
"Kim! No! Not now!" I yelled at her in panic.
Kim stopped and looked at me with a frown. "Bakit? Pinapahiram mo naman ako dati
ha?" she asked with a pout.
"Not now. Uh...ano kasi." Fuck. What should I tell her? Na there's a guy hiding in
my closet kaya wag now?
"Ano nga? Sabihin mo na. Hindi naman ako magagalit."
I can't tell you the truth! "Ano kasi! Nangangati paa ko!"
"May alipunga ka?" she asked, horrified.
"That's not what I said! Sabi ko makati lang!"
"Ay, sige. Next time na lang ako manghihiram. Hehe," Kim laughed awkwardly.
I facepalmed myself. "Nooo. I don't have alipunga!" I groaned.
"Sinong may alipunga?" J appeared out of nowhere.
"Wala-"
"Si L meron yata," Kim interrupted me.
"Ay. Gusto mo pabili ako kay River ng gamot? Papunta siya dito e," J asked.
I pulled my hair in frustration. "Wala akong alipunga. Nooo. Ewww."
"Okay lang yan, L. Minsan talaga may mga nangyayari sa atin natin na di natin
guston." She sighed. "Tulad ko na lang! Ilang linggo na nakalipas nung na wrong
sent ako sa mga pinsan ni River, hindi ko pa rin sila maharap hanggang ngayon."
Kim
burst out laughing. "Oh my God! Ang epic talaga non!" she exclaimed.
I chuckled. "Check-check din kasi pag may time," I teased her. I looked at my
closet and envisioned Kade grinning. I was with him when Jamie sent him the text
message na para sa amin ni Kim. She sent it to Lake too.
"Hay nako. Simula nun, lagi ko na tsini-check no. Very, very traumatic experience,"
she said, cringing at the memory.
I laughed at her troubled expression. Thank God for Jamie and awkwardness! We
stopped talking na about my supposedly alipunga. Like ew, no.
Jamie sniffed. "Uy, amoy pizza dito."
I stilled. Shit. Trust Jamie and her sensitive nose. "Wala naman!"
"Meron talaga e." She sniffed the air again. "Makapagpa-deliver na nga lang ng
lasagna. Bye!" she said before running outside of my room.
"She's so weird," Kim whispered. "Amoy pizza tapos lasagna bibilhin?" she asked
while shaking her head. "Sige, L. Hanap na ako ng shoes sa room ko."
"I-iMessage mo na lang sakin if you find one later. My head's bothering me and I
wanna sleep for now."
"Masama pa rin ba pakiramdam mo?" she asked as she felt up my forehead. "Mainit ka
pa rin."
"Yeah. I'll sleep it off na lang. I think hell week is catching up on me," I said,
not lying this time.
"Okay. Pahinga ka na! Thanks, L!" she said as she left my room. I immediately
locked it up and released a huge sigh.
My closet doors immediately opened and Kade came out snorting, trying his hardest
not to laugh too hard. "Athlete's foot? That was genius, Salazar!"
I slapped the back of his head. "Shut up! I just saved our asses."
He dived into my bed and rolled over. "C'mon, let's eat your pizza," he said as he
patted my bed. I took the pizza boxes out under the bed and tossed it on his lap.
Kade set aside the other box. He opened one and took one slice. I sat beside him
and took one.
"How many times have we been cockblocked?" I asked as I munched on my meatlovers

pizza.
Kade cough and choked on his pizza. I grinned and took my tumbler from my bedside
table. I opened it and gave it to him. He drank it right away.
"What the fuck, Salazar?" he asked, chuckling.
"It's true, right? We almost kissed twice. Whenever we attempt to kiss each other,
someone always interrupts." The guard on their mansion and Kim. I can't remember
kung may mas nauna pa sa two incidents na yun.
Kade shrugged. "Maybe it's not the right time, yet."
"Yeah, maybe." I was chewing my pizza when an idea crossed my mind. I swallowed it
right away. "I got an idea," I said with a huge grin.
"Good God, no..." he groaned.
I smirked at him. "If this year ends and we still haven't kissed again, I'll tell
everyone I'm yours." Hopefully, my feelings are sorted out na by that time. Para it
would be a win-win situation for the two of us.
Kade groaned again. "I'll fucking lose. I know that for sure."
=================
Chapter 20: Secrets
Chapter 20
Secrets
Nine Months Ago...
You know that feeling when you're in a room full of people-relatives that you're
not really comfortable spending the time with? It's suffocating, right? Ang masama
pa, kailangan mo pa silang pakisamahan nang maayos just because tis the season to
be jolly, tralalalalalala~
Yep. Tonight's the 24th of December and we're celebrating it here in La Loma with
my mama's relatives.
Sobrang awkward.
Papa is here too. But everyone has given him a wide berth. Palagi naman e. When I
was younger, it always made me question why my mother's family treated us this way.
But now that I learned the reason, I kind of understand them. Because that's
exactly what I'm doing with my father now. I avoided him all day. I avoided him
all-week.
I did what I had to do to make an escape. I texted Kade.
Save me, please.
Perfect timing. I was about to text you.
My brow arched. Why would he text me now? Not that I'm not grateful that he
replied, nakakapagtaka lang.
Why? What's up?I replied.
I got something for you. Where are you now?
Ahh. A gift. I texted him the address of my grandparents' house. I also told him
that we has to be extra careful because I won't tell them I'm leaving. I'm gonna
sneak out and leave this place. I don't really feel like celebrating this occasion
with them. It's
shitty, I know. Hindi ako plastic.
I'll text you when I'm only a block away.
I sighed in relief. Thank God for a very reliable non-boyfriend. Makakaalis na rin
ako dito. I'm going to be able to breathe na. Finally.
"Bu." I stiffened when I recognized my father's voice.
And there goes my relief. It was obviously short lived. I've been hiding from him
since the Christmas vacation had started. I can't believe dito niya ako mako-
corner.
I sighed as I turned around. I looked up and saw my father's pleading stare. My

father, Joel Salazar, is a very, very proud man. For an old man, he's really fit.
His presence is imposing and intimidating. A lesser man would immediately cower
kapag ihinarap sa kanya.
But despite all of that, my father is a very loving family man.
"Bu, anak. Can we talk?" he asked his voice low but firm.
Can we talk na ba? Kaya ko na ba? Am I ready to hear his explanation? I shook my
head. "I'm not ready yet, pa."
Papa sighed and massaged his temples, a sign that he's frustrated. "If not now,
when? It's been four months, Louisse."
Papa, believe me. I would've talked to you before kung kaya ko lang maging plastic.
But I didn't say those words. I just kept my mouth shut and stared at him
stubbornly.
My mother, Letty Salazar, suddenly appeared at my father's side. "Babe, huwag

ngayon," she said to him. She glanced at me. "The three of us will talk tomorrow.
Sa bahay," she said to me sternly.
I just nodded before
walking away from them.
My phone vibrated in my hand. I flipped it over and saw Kade's text.
I'm here.
I glanced back at my parents. They were hugging each other. I looked at my mother's
face and saw her discreetly wiping her face. She's hurting and it's because of me.
She's a very loving mother and a wonderful wife to my dad. She's a softie but she's
also a badass. She's graceful and still beautiful despite her age. She was a model
before she met my father.
I remembered one time; papa said that he hit the jackpot when he met my mother.
Before, I always get giddy whenever I remember him saying that. But now, I just
feel... betrayed.
If she was such a catch, why did he leave her? Yes, he came back but it was never
the same as before.
I felt my eyes started to well up. I blinked twice before I started to walk away
from my grandma's house.
***
"Hey," I greeted Kade when I got inside his car. The headlights of his car was
turned off. We were surrounded by the twinkling Christmas lights.
"You okay?" he asked as he watched me put on my seat belt.
I nodded as I leaned back on the seat. "Yeah. Just... drained, I guess," I said, my
eyes at the windshield.
"Okay. You can sleep if you want to. I'll just wake you up when we get there."
"Where? Where are you taking me?"
"I'm taking you at the Rooftop."
I looked at him with suspicion. "You planned something."
"I always
do." He said as he gently and smoothly took my hand and placed it on his right leg.
"What are you doing?" I asked as I watch him man the stick shift.
He glanced at me briefly before he looked back at the road again. "Do I have to
explain everything?" he asked, irritated. He took my hand again and squeezed it.
I held my breath as the realization sink in.
Oh, my freaking word.
He's holding my hand while driving. That's very... um romantic. Gosh. Chill ka
lang, L. Don't make it look like you're hyperventilating just because someone held
your hand while driving for the very first time.
Chill. Breathe out.
"Hey. You okay, babe?" he asked, squeezing my hand again.
"Yep. 100%," I said with a tight-lipped smile. Ang hirap magpigil ng kilig.
***
I gasped when Kade's car rounded the of the spiral ramp. Despite the darkness, the
headlights revealed what Kade's surprise was. A good portion of the parking lot
building's rooftop was decorated with fairy lights. There's a couch near at the
east side and there's a table-for-two set-up at the west side.
I looked at him and saw that he was already looking at me, waiting for my reaction.
"Why?" I asked again, confused. I mean, bakit ngayong Christmas eve? If I didn't
text him earlier, hindi niya malalaman na free ako for the rest of the night. Was
he expecting me to drop everything if he had called earlier?
"I was just hoping," he said with a tight-lipped smile. I know he's holding back.
He was gonna say something
more but he stopped himself. I don't wanna push him so I didn't ask. Baka katulad
ko, he's avoiding his family tonight.
"C'mon, let's light everything up." He jumped out of the car before I could utter a
respond. I followed him immediately.
"What if it rains?" I asked pointing at the couch.
He pointed at the darker other side of the rooftop. "There's a storage room there."
I put my hands on my hips. "How are you gonna light everything up? There's no
electricity here," I said, looking around. Shit. Ang dilim talaga. Without his
car's headlights, we wouldn't see where we're going.
"Says who?" he asked smugly.
What? There's an electricity na? "What? How?" I asked, confused. Ano yun? He bought
this shitty parking lot building? Sayang pera niya!
Kade shrugged. "Rented the rooftop."
I sighed in relief. "Thank God you didn't buy the whole building. I would kick you
in the nuts if you do that."
He showed me his half-smile, half-smirk. Good gods. "Never thought you're into
that," he said, his voice low.
I rolled my eyes. "Fuck off, Ongpauco."
He chuckled. "I'll switch the breaker on. Get our food from the car."
I did what I was told. I took our food aka pizza and three large bottles of
rootbeer from the backseat.
"Pizza again?" I asked as I walk towards the table. Wow. The rooftop looked like a
movie set from a rom-com movie. Perfect ambience for a romantic casual date.
Kade came up behind me. His arms snaked around my waist. "That's
your favorite, right?" he whispered in my ear.
I tried to ignore the weird tingling sensation crawling up my spine. "Yup. But
aren't you sick of it already?"
"Nope," he said as his nose trailed on my shoulder. Shit. Even if I'm wearing a
huge crewneck sweatshirt, I can still feel his heat seeping through it.
I cleared my throat and moved away from him. I sat at the nearest chair. "Okay. So
you know what my favorite food is. What else do you know about me?"I asked to
distract him. More like to distract myself.
Kade took the seat in front of me. He twisted his lips and thought quietly for a
minute. He smiled at me before he started talking. "You hate EDM but you're a music
lover with an eclectic taste. You hate losing; you're competitive as all hell." My
eyebrows both rose to my hairline. So far, so good.
"You're an adrenaline junkie but you're also a homebody. You love Disney movies,
especially The Lion King and Mulan. But you're a fan of gory and morbid films,
too." He paused. He waved towards the citylights. "You love the beach as much as
you love the seeing the citylights."
I gulped. "What else?"
Kade's smile widened. "You're a tough cookie to crack. Only few people know that
you're actually a softie."
I looked away from him and opened the pizza box in front of me. Meatlovers. Even
down to the pizza toppings, he knows what my favorites are. "You act like you don't
give a fuck but you care a lot; especially to those who mean a lot to you."
He took one bottle of rootbeer and opened
it with ease. "You're fiercely loyal. You'd do everything for your closest friends
and family," he said as he poured the rootbeer in a plastic cup.
He showed me his boyish grin when he placed the plastic cup in front of me. "And
you're the kind of girl that I would love to be with."
"What else?" I bit my lower lip. Fuck. Baka mapatili na lang ako dito bigla. Calm
the fuck out, L. Find your chill.
He leaned closer. "Patay na patay ka din sakin," he teased.
I leaned back. "Wow. That is a bold statement." Shit. Ang yabang niya talaga. But
it works for him.
He leaned back, still wearing that smug smile of his. "How about you? How much do
you know about me?"
I rolled my eyes. "We're practically the same. You're fiercely loyal; especially to
your family. You'd kill for Bay and Ocean and probably wouldn't regret doing it. "
"You'd do anything for them," I said with a shrug. Trying to downplay it. Kade
nodded in agreement.
Hmm. What else? Oh, right. His reputation. "You have this douchebag reputation but
you're really just a nice guy hiding behind this intimidating exterior."
That earned a chuckle from him. But he didn't disagree. "What else?"
I was blown away. The fact that he didn't disagree says a lot. He really does trust
me.
I blinked twice and decided to continue with simpler things I knew about him. "You
love sports. If given the time and stamina, you'd probably play every single sport
there is. You love American and European football. You know how to drive a racecar.
You taught
Lake how to play baseball." I'm still blown away whenever I remember his kwento
kung pano niya tinuruan si Lake when they were just kids.
"You're practically their big brother," I said with a proud smile.

He didn't return it though. But his eyes were heated. "You know what I like about
you the most, Salazar?" he asked and I just stared at him. I have no freaking idea.
"You make it so easy to fall in love with you."
Oh.
My.
Fucking.
God.
My jaw dropped and my eyes widened. Goodbye, Pokerface. Since I started dating him,
I forgot how to do make a decent pokerface. "Dude..." I said, speechless.
Kade smirked. "And you're trying to deflect me by saying 'dude'. I know you,
Salazar."
"Yeah, right," I said, struggling to calm down.
"I know you enough. It feels like I could tell you my deepest, darkest secrets."
I looked up and saw him staring me, his smirk gone. Minsan, I feel like bipolar
siya. He's smug one time and then he'll be serious the next. "Go ahead. Tell me," I
said with a single nod.
"Are you sure? It's a fucking mess. You might want to sit this one out."
I sighed. He knows I love challenges and he just throw me one. "You don't say
things like that, Ongpauco. You know I'll take it as a challenge."
He sighed. "You were warned." It was an omen that I didn't pay attention to.
He took his wallet and pulled out a picture. He handed it to me. I reluctantly took
it and I frowned when I saw that it was a family
picture.
"That's me and my mom," he said. I looked up at him and saw him looking at the
citylights.
"And this guy is your dad?" I asked as I looked at the man pictured with them.
"Yup, my dad." I was about to nod when he added, "And River's and Lake's."
I dropped the picture at the table as if it burned my hand. "What?!" I sputtered.

My eyes wide and my jaw hanging.
He wasn't looking at me. It was like seeing a person going astral. It was weird and
at the same time, I can't look away. "Besides Bay and Ocean, I have two other
younger sisters." I gasped. I can't believe what I'm hearing. "They're named Rain
and Drizzle. Rain and River both have the same mother."
"You're all siblings? How?" I asked, aghast.
Kade heaved a huge sigh. It was like seeing him for the very first time. Cliché man
pakinggan but he's like carrying the world on his shoulders. "My dad is the classic
womanizer. He married three women and probably fucked every woman he met."
I stifled a gasp. Hindi ka na dapat ma-surprise, L. This shit is like the weirdest
plot-twist ever. "But everyone knows you're all cousins. How did that come about?"
"Angkong, our grandfather did everything to protect the Ongpauco name." A man, a
grandfather can do that to his grandkids? "My mom was a minor when she married my
dad. Angkong didn't see her it as an Ongpauco. He made them split up. Instead of
fighting for his first wife, Dad got a hooker pregnant. That was Lake's mom," he
said, his voice hollow and his tone was nonchalant.
Kade continued. "Just to
spite Angkong, he married her. Angkong... ordered a hit on her."
"Oh my gods. Are you serious?" I only see those things happening in Philippine
teleseryes. But I guess nangyayari talaga to sa totoong buhay. Man, just look at
me. I have the same problem. Not same-same, just similar. Daddy issues.
"It was a rumor."
I only shook my head in disbelief. Sabi ko hindi na ako magugulat but fuck it. I
can be shock if I wanted to.
"And then there's River and Rain. They're the legitimate children of my father. Dad
married his third wife because she gained Angkong's approval. Dad lucked out.
Auntie Aina is a saint."
But if River and Rain were the legitimate children? How come Drizzle, Bay and Ocean
were existing? "How about Drizzle, Bay and Ocean?" I asked slowly.
Kade sighed again. "Drizzle was a product of a one-night-stand. Only Angkong and
dad knew who her mother was." It looks like he's in pain. Mahal niya talaga little
sisters niya. "Dad and Auntie Aina split up. She had had enough. Dad came back to
my mom. He said she was the love of his life. Mom believed her. Bay and Ocean
happened."
Ang gulo. My head is fucking spinning. "We were legally adopted by our dad's
brothers. That's the only way we could use the Ongpauco name legally. They wouldn't
get their inheritance if they declined."
"That's horseshit," I said in disbelief. Money, money, money. Iba talaga nagagawa
ng pera sa tao.
"I really wish it was."
We just stared for a solid five minutes. I can't believe everything that I heard
was true. He just told me his secret... Their family secret. It's a huge scandal
waiting to happen. Sila-silang pamilya lang ang nakakaalam nuon. And he trusted me
to keep it too. I know it's a burden for me to carry now. I know it's not about me
but I can't help but feel special. He just showed me a side of him that only few
people know.
I feel like I should do the same. Because somehow, I started to trust him.
"My dad left us when I was only 5," I blurted out.
"Huh?" Kade was taken aback.

I squeezed my eyes shut. "Just listen, okay? I don't know what to tell you." I
don't know how to comfort him and I don't know if he wants me to comfort him. "So
maybe I'll just tell you my secrets."
"Okay..." he said, his the tips of his lips twitching.
I nodded and decided to continue. "I can't remember it. Maybe I repressed it?
Whatever those psych majors call it. So yeah. I can't remember it," I rambled.
Kade's brows furrowed in confusion. "But he came back, right?"he asked.
I nodded. I can feel my eyes tearing up. "He came back. But everything was never
the same. They just acted like it was." I bit my lower lip to stop myself from
crying. "They didn't tell me he had another family," I said in a low voice.
Kade didn't say a word. He just waited for me to continue. I swallowed loudly. "I
didn't know I have younger siblings until I overheard them talking four months
ago."
"We met four months ago," he commented.
"Yeah. The night you saw me drunk and dancing at table-tops? That was the same
night I learned the truth." And I can still remember and feel the pain of knowing
that I was practically living a lie.
Kade chuckled mirthlessly. "Looks like we got screwed up by our own dads."
"Daddy issues are the worst," I said as I shook my head.
"Tell me about it." We were both quiet after that. It was like we were both giving
each other our spaces. Kailangan namin ng time to absorb everything that we
revealed about ourselves.
Kade broke the awkward silence. "I have one more thing I learned about you."
I squinted my eyes at him. "What is it?" I asked.
Kade smiled, the smile I rarely see. Kasi minsan niya lang pakawalan. "You have
this wall. You only let few people in."
I blinked. "You're... right," I said hesitantly.
"I just got in, Salazar," he said, his tone serious.
I nodded. "I guess you're right about that, too."
=================
Chapter 21: Waiting Game
Chapter 21
Waiting Game
Eight Months Ago...
The talk my mother insisted didn't happen. I went home straight to our house in
Cavite. They stayed naman on my grandma's house. Hindi sila nakatanggi because
grandma insisted.
Sumunod na mga araw nun, I made myself scarce. I never stayed in our house for more
than 7 hours. I went on a short roadtrip, watched the cinemas, had a foodtrip, read
books and watched series on my car. I did them on my own. I managed naman. I didn't
invite Kade kasi ayokong magmukhang clingy. Lagi na lang din naman kaming
magkasama.
Isa pa, I need my own 'me time.'
Hindi ko rin ma-invite si J because she's always with her boyfriend, River. K was
on the north naman. I find it hassle na pumunta pa ng Pampanga. Hindi naman ako
familiar sa roads dun.
When I deemed it was okay na to go back to our apartment, sumakto na may date si
mama and papa. Sinamantala ko na yun kaya nakaalis ako ng bahay na walang
humaharang sa akin. I just texted them na pauwi na ako ng Manila. My mother didn't
reply. I know she was mad. Papa just said na mag-ingat ako and that he loves me.
Napagod na siguro makipagtalo sa akin.
It made me feel guilty, of course. I never had a rebellious-teen phase when I was a
teenager. Pero I feel na late siya dumating sa akin ngayong nasa 20s na ako. Hindi
siya nakakatuwa. Ang bigat sa pakiramdam. But I just can't help myself e. I'm hurt.
I'm so damn hurt that I can't confront the reason behind it.
I am a frank
and a straight-forward person. Pero pagdating sa matter na to. Sa problema ko kay

papa, sa pagkakaroon niya ng second family... I would always found myself back-
pedalling.
Yes, Louisse Salazar is a fucking coward.
***
Pare-parehas kaming tatlo na nakatambay sa sala. Ngayon na lang uli nangyari ito na
magkakasama kaming tatlo na super chill lang. Well, kami ni K chill lang. Si J,
kanina pa nakahilata sa black beanbag niya at pinagmumura ang boyfriend niya.
Natalo kasi si J nung nag air-hockey sila ni River. Ang parusa sa kanya nito ay
samahan siyang mag-jogging. Hindi man lang nag-prepare ng maayos at napaka walang-
kwenta lang dawn g warm-up niya. Ayan, she ended up like that.
She can't move a single muscle. Everything hurts daw.
Of course, hindi namin papalagpasin ni K na asarin siya because of her current

situation.
"Uulit ka pang mag-jogging?" K teased J. She's on the sofa, applying red polish on
her fingernails.
"Never," J answered firmly. Looks like pinagsisisihan niya talaga ang pagsama sa
pagjo-jogging ni River.
K chuckled. "Lakas din ng trip ni River no?" she asked before gently blowing on her
fingernails.
"You have no idea," J grumbled.
That made me smile a little. Nakakatuwa na nakakakilig na kay River nakita ni Jamie
ang first love niya. Ganun din si River kay J. Hindi lang ako sigurado kung first
love niya nga ba si J or what. Nevertheless, nakakakilig pa rin kasi I know na he's
really head over heels in love with her.
Medyo hesitant pa ako sa relationship nila before because it was
a whirlwind romance. It was just so damn fast. But seeing my best friend happy and
in love? And seeing her mysterious and silent boyfriend na gumagawa ng silly things
with her? Nakakakilig diba?
I don't think na ginagawa niya lang yun just for fun. Ang layo e. Ang layo nila sa
isat isa. Sa lahat ng aspeto magkaiba sila but they just clicked. Kaya I know na
there's something special between them.
Huwag lang talaga papaiyakin ni River si Jamie. If he dared to break my best

friend's heart, I will break his fucking neck.
"Ikaw, L? Kamusta bakasyon mo?" J asked, obviously changing the topic.
I sighed. "Awkward, as usual," I answered as short and honestly as possible. She

looked at me, waiting. I ignored the urge to sigh again. "I'm just so happy na
nandito na ako where I can be myself," I added. I pushed up my glasses kasi malapit
na siyang mag-slide down sa nose bridge ko.
Yep. I wear one pero kapag nasa bahay lang. Ang hassle kasi kapag suot ko siya sa
labas. Malalaman din ng iba ang inner geek ko kapag nakita nilang I wore glasses.
Nagulat kami nang biglang may kumatok ng malakas sa front door namin.
Jamie eyed me and K. "Are we expecting someone?" tanong niya.
K shook her head. "Nagpa-deliver ka ban g pagkain, L?"
I sat up straight. "Nope. I'm on a tight budget," I answered.
Then suddenly, both K and I shouted... "Not me!" I swear to God, it was just a
reflex and unfortunately for J sabay kami ni Kim na nakaisip nun.
Jamie groaned. "Seriously, guys?" she asked in disbelief. "Kita niyong baldado ako
dito, ako ang pagbubukasin niyo ng pinto?" she groaned again which made me and Kim
laugh.
"Rules are rules," I told her smugly. It was a tradition. Whenever the three of us
are in the same place sa bahay and there's someone knocking on the door, sisgaw
kami ng 'not me!' And kung sino yung hindi makakapagsabi or mahuhuli, siya ang mag-
oopen ng door.
J remained lying on her beanbag. Walang balak buksan yung door.
Kim giggled. "Hindi mo ba bubuksan yung pinto, J?" she asked. J glared at her and
tried to throw the nearest pillow to K. She failed miserably. Nalaglag lang sa face
niya yung throw pillow. That made us laugh harder.
"Open the door, J," I told her after I recovered from laughing way too hard.
She shook her head and put an arm on her eyes. Tigas ng ulo!
"Bahala siya. Kung sino man siyang bwisit siya," she grumbled.
Inayos ni Kim yung mga panglinis niya ng nails and nail polishes and she put it in
a shoebox. "Huy, J! Baka importante!" she said as she closed the shoebox with its
cover.
J,being the pikon that she is, threw her arm up and glared at K. "Edi buksan mo
yung pinto mag-isa!"
K stuck her tongue out. "Sorry. Rules are rules, J."
She grumbled incoherently before she gingerly stood up. K and I snickered as we
watched her walk like she just had a circumcision. She opened the door slowly and
took a peek outside. The door swung open.
"Annabeth!" I loud voice said... a loud man's voice said. We watched as the guy put
his shoulder on J's stomach. He stood up immediately
and carried J like a sack of rice.
I squinted through my glasses and saw who the guy was and sino pa yung mga kasama
niya.
They were Lake, River and Cascade.
I cursed and stood up. Wala akong bra! And I look horrible! They can't see me like
this! HE can't and shouldn't see me like this! It's too damn embarrassing!
I ran towards my room and slammed the door shut.
FUCK.
My stomach dropped when I saw my phone lit up. I just know na galing kay Kade yung
new text message!
I snatched it from my bedside table and read the goddamned text from Kade.
Nice shorts.
And then another one popped up.

No. Let me rephrase that.
Nice legs.
I groaned. NAKAKAINIS! Akala mo, it was his first time seeing my legs! Gods. He's
really annoying.
Nang matapos akong makapagbihs at makapag-ayos, lumabas kaagad ako ng kwarto ko.
Ayoko namang isipin nila na sobrang importante nila para mag-ayos ako ng OA.I just
wore a denim shorts and replaced my ratty white shirt with a blank tank top. I put
on some BB cream na lang and I also fixed my brows.
"Wow, bro. Didn't know you're that good. You went hard on her?" I rolled my eyes
knowing na it was Kade who said that.
"Oo! Sobrang hard niya kanina! Walang patawad!" J said without thinking. I
facepalmed myself as I laughed with them. Minsan talaga, I just can't comprehend na
may katulad talaga nilang dalawa ni K. They're
too damn innocent for their own good.
"You're such a jerk, Ongpauco," I told Kade.
He smirked. "Which one?" he quipped immediately.
I ignored him na and I sat on my beanbag na.
"Bakit ba kayo nandito? Anong meron?" J asked.I watched her and River. Tinulungan
siya nito na makaupo sa sofa and he sat beside her after that. Naks. Ang sweet.
"We're here to give you this," Lake said as he handed out an envelope J. She opened
it immediately and read the invitation card.
"Ano to?" she asked as she eyed the card.
Ahhh. I remember na. There's a party later at The Ledge. Kade asked me a week ago
for our names kasi ilalagay niya daw kami sa guestlist and shit.
"It's an invite for The Last Hurrah sa The Ledge. Exclusive yung party kaya by
invites lang. Punta kayo mamaya ha!" Lake said with an easy smile.
I glared at Kade. He could've texted me earlier na ide-deliver nila personally yung

invites. He just smirked at me.
J patted my leg. "Babe, punta tayo?" she asked.
I shrugged. "If you're okay na, sure." I eyed her. Mukhang okay na siya niyan
later.
She looked at her boyfriend. "Gusto mo ba akong pumunta?" she asked. I wanna smack
her. Kaya nga may invite siya diba? They own The Ledge kaya. Doesn't she supposed
to know that by now?
River nodded. "Of course," he said with a bewildered expression. Weird talaga
nilang dalawa sometimes... m ost of the times, rather.
"I guess, that's settled!" Lake exclaimed. "Bye, girls!" he said with a wave
before he left the apartment. Huh. Kade followed. I felt my phone vibrated when he
got outside.
Wait for me in your window.
I felt my face heat up. I jumped in surprise when Lake barged in again. "Oh! And
make sure Tinker Bell comes, yeah?" he said with a grin before he disappeared
again.
Oh, hell no.
He likes her.
"Kasama ako?" K squeaked after River closed the door on his way out.
"Ay, nandyan ka pala!" J said, her tone sarcastic. I chuckled at her. Natuto lang
ng kaunti kay River, tsk.
Well, I can't blame her. It was weird seeing Kim well-behaved and quiet around
boys. Isa lang naman ang meaning nun! Crush niya yung guy! I know, it's so high
school.
"Bakit niya ako pinapasama?" K asked, panicking.
J shrugged. "Baka bet ka niya."
J's right. I showed Kim a saccharine smile. "Be careful, K." Ibang gulo at saya ang
dala ng isang Ongpauco.
***
"Took you long enough," I said to Kade the moment he stepped inside of my room. I
squinted as I walked towards him."Why are you here? We're gonna see each other
naman later."
Kade grabbed my hips and pulled me against his body. I looked up in his face as he
wrapped his arms around me. "Am I not allowed to miss you?" he asked with a grin.
I bit my lower lip to prevent myself from grinning like a loon.
"Of course, you're allowed." I put my hands on his chest. "But can you not wait for
like 7 more hours?"
"Let's just say I'm done waiting."
"Hindi mo
talaga ako matiis, right?"
"Yup. I really missed your face, Salazar." He leaned down and like a lovestruck
teen, I met his lips halfway. His lips were soft and hard at the same time. His
kisses were meant to tease and to make me beg for more.
My hands found his nape and I massaged it as we continued to share a lazy, sensual
kiss.
"Was it really my face or my lips you really missed?" I asked, my eyes still
closed, as he pulled away from me.
I felt his body shake as he chuckled. "I missed your lips more." And then he gave
my lips a loud smack.
I opened my eyes and smiled at him. "Admit it, you missed the whole me."
"I missed you, Louisse Salazar."
Thank God we're both holding on to each other. Kasi kung hindi? Kanina pa ako nag-
swoon.
Before, I didn't know I'm capable of feeling this lightness. It sounds so clichéd.
But when I'm with him? It feels like I'm floating. I can't describe the whole
feeling. Minsan magulo, minsan parang lumulutang ka lang.
Fuck. What did he do to me to make me feel like this?
"It's a miracle no one interrupted us no?" I teased, intentionally ignoring his

sweet admission.
Kade smirked knowingly. "I remember we had a bet a few weeks ago. You remember pa?"
Oh, shit! The bet! I totally forgot about it!
I made a bet with him that if he can wait until the new year na hindi niya ako
mahahalikan, papayag na ako na magsabi sa friends namin about us. He won! He won
kasi hindi ako nagpakita sa kanya after that!
I'm
such a loser.
"I won, Salazar. I won that easy," he teased me. I just scowled at him, fighting
the urge to run. "You know what that means, right?"
"Aamin na ako sa kanila, yeah." My voice was calm but inside, I feel like my
stomach dropped. Panic starts to creep in. I don't know where it came from. It was
so irrational. But I can't help but feel it.
"Later?" he asked, his smile hopeful. I can't find it in my heart how to say no.
"Okay."
My gods. I think I spoke too soon. I'm jinxing myself.
Is 'jinxing' even a word?
***
"Late na tayo!" J exclaimed from the backseat.
"And so? May attendance ba?" I quipped. Akala niya ha. Parang hindi na sila nasanay
sa akin. It's better to arrive late than to arrive ugly.
I saw J scowled from the rear view mirror. Isip-bata.

"Ano bang meron sa The Last Hurrah?" Kim asked suddenly.
"It's an exclusive party for the DLU's senior's student. May nakakalusot na hindi,
like K. But that's because she has an invite from the Ongpaucos." I glanced at K
quickly and smiled. I focused again on the road. "Self-explanatory siya, actually.
Last Hurrah, it's like huling chance na to party because of the grueling hell weeks
that will come."
"So before natin harapin ang mga books and requirements natin, susulitin na natin
ang huling hirit sa pagpa-party? Ganun ba?" J asked. I nodded.
"Yup. The calm before the storm yadda, yadda, yadda. You get the picture."
When we got into The Ledge, the whole club was pouring with people. The smoke
was too thick, you can't miss the smell of mixed sweat, alcohol and cigarette
smoke. The music was too damn loud. Gods. I really hate EDM and it's senseless
lyrics.
It was so wild! I almost got elbowed in the face. Thank God, I have fast reflexes!
I released a huge sigh of relief when River brought us to the VIP area. When we got
to the couch he reserved for us, I immediately checked my phone.
There was a text message from Kade.
Meet me at the bar.
"Baby, I'll be back in five minutes!" I heard River told J. I raised my head and
saw her smile and nod at him.
"I saw someone. I'll just say hi," I blurted out and pointed somewhere awkwardly. I
made my escape when both K and J nodded at me.
I immediately went to the bar at the VIP area. I recognized Kade's broad shoulder
and I went towards him. He was sitting in one of the stools in front of the bar. I
grinned when I saw the seat next to him was empty.
"Can I buy you a drink?" I whispered in his ear before I sat on the stool next to
his.
Kade glanced at me. I arched a brow at him, waiting for his reaction. His eyes
raked from my face to my body. He was openly checking me out and it made me feel
hot.
I saw the tip of his lip raised slightly. He obviously liked what he saw.
I was wearing a little white dress that ended at my mid-thighs, black suede ankle-
boots and a black leather jacket. I let my hair down and wore a dark red lippie.
"Are you done checking me out?"
I asked with a smirk.
"Yep." He leaned close to me. "And you look gorgeous," he said before kissing my
lips. We kissed briefly before I pulled away. Nawala sa isip ko na maraming
nakakakilala samin dito.
I wiped the stain of the dark red lippie on his lips with my thumb and he did the
same to me. "Patron?" I asked, disgusted. I tasted it on his mouth. Wala pang
midnight and he's already taking shots of Patron.
"It's Cuervo." Kade smirked. "Patron is for pussies, Salazar."
"Kade! Louisse!" Napalingon kaming dalawa ni Kade when River and Kim made their way
towards us. Medyo lumayo ako nang kaunti dahil nakita ko yung weirded out na tingin
ni Kim sa amin.
"What's up?" I asked, alarmed when I saw River's distressed face.
"Jamie's gone!" he yelled through the loud music.
What? Gone? "Did you check the ladies' room?"
"Galing ako dun! Iniwan ko lang siya saglit para mag-CR! Akala ko kasi babalik
kaagad si River!"
"I got held-up by my classmates. When I got back, she wasn't there."
"Did you look anywhere else?" Kade asked.
"We haven't. But I know she's not in the VIP area."
"Let's split-up. I'll look for her outside. You guys look for her here," Kade said
before he left.
I looked at Kim's concerned face. "Hey, nandito lang yun si Jamie. Let's find her
na."
***
Found her. Park.
I sighed in relief. Kade must've called River because I saw him on his phone. The
worry he
felt over Jamie sobered him up.
After he ended the call, River faced me and Kim. "Stay here," he said before he
left us at the VIP area.
"Ano kayang nangyari kay J?" I asked her.
She shook her head. "I hope walang nangyaring masama sa kanya," K said. Mukhang
maiiyak na siya sa kaba any moment. I held her hand and squeezed it.
No. Nothing can happen to Jamie. She's protected here. They knew she's River's
girlfriend. Whoever so much as looked at her wrong will get their ass whooped by
River.
Minutes later, Kade and River emerged from the crowd with a crying Jamie in tow.
The controlled rage was evident on River's face. Shit. Just by looking at their
grim faces, I know something bad really happened.
River looked like he's gonna kill someone. He's that furious. What the heck
happened to, Jamie?
The three of them stopped. River looked at Jamie. I read his lips, "Is it them?"
Is it them? What? Anong ginawa nila kay Jamie?
I stood up and went up to them.I stopped when River gave a single nod to the guy
standing near the couches. The gesture looked sinister. "Shalvis."
"What's up, Ongpauco?" the stupid-looking guy asked.
River snapped. Everything happened so fast. One minute, the Shalvis was standing in
front of River and then the next; he's sprawled on the floor. His nose was oozing
with blood and he's knocked out of his consciousness.
The bouncers ushered Shalvis and his friends out of the VIP area and possibly, out
of The Ledge.
I just
stood there in the middle, watching with wide-eyes.
River hooked his arms around Jamie's neck and he pulled her close to him. He kissed
her lips before he yelled "Nobody messes with my girl."
I looked over to Kade. He was watching me. "Nobody messes with you, too," he
mouthed.
***
I was furious with Kade. He just lied.
He told them he didn't take a single drop of alcohol tonight. He appointed himself
as the designated driver! Hindi lang ako nakapalag kasi when he did that... I was
already sleeping at the backseat of his pick-up truck.Kung hindi pa ako nagising, I
wouldn't know na nagpresinta siya.
What if may maaksidente kami? What if masaktan siya? Wala pa siyang suot na
seatbelt!
I can't nag at him in front of our friends because I know that will raise questions
and suspicions from them. Nakakainis na situation!
Sa sobrang inis ko sa kanya at sa situation, pasimple ko siyang kinurot sa

tagiliran niya.
Because of that, he stepped on the breaks.
"Para po!" J yelled. That made all of us laugh so hard.
Holy tacos. What a night.
"Sorry, guys. There was a cat," Kade said, adding emphasis on the word 'cat'. That
made me laugh even more.
"I really, really like you, Annabeth!" Lake exclaimed.
Jamie looked at me and Kim. "Traitors."

***
"Ang tagal naman ni J bumaba! Nilalamok na tayo dito!" K complained as we waited

for Jamie. Nasa loob pa kasi siya ng kotse ni Kade. Nagpapaalam pa sa Knight-In-
Shining-Armor niya.
I just closed
my eyes and tried not to topple over. Sobrang nahihilo na ako. I won't puke pa
naman but I can feel the ground moving na. So fucking weird, right? I hate being
this drunk.
I jumped when I felt a warm hand on my back. I opened my eyes and looked beside me
and saw Kade sporting a bored face. Patay-malisya. I smiled at him and mouthed a
'thank you.'
"Ang tagal talaga! Naiihi na ko!" Kim continued to complain.
"Okay lang ba kung mag overnight ako kila River?" J asked when she jumped out of
Kade's truck.
I squinted my eyes at her. "Isusuko mo na ba ang Bataan?" I managed to ask without

slurring. She shook her head.
"Wala kayong gagawing masama ha?" K asked.
J noded and did the Vulcan salute. "I promise."
Kade pulled his hand off me and I immediately felt the loss of his warmth. Ugh. He
went close to Jamie. He pulled his wallet and pulled out, I presume a condom.
I was wrong. It was three-packs of condoms. "Just in case," he told J. What an ass.
Binigyan niya talaga ng idea!
"You think you're so funny, Ongpauco?" I sneered at him.
Kade looked at me, a smirk playing on his lips. I shrieked when he suddenly carried
me on his shoulder. I punched him son his back. "Put me down!" I hissed at him. His
grin on my thigh tightened.
"C'mon, I'll walk you to your door." K ran towards us. "Get inside and lock the
doors." J did as she was told.
I flailed when he started walking. "Put me down!"
"Quit it, Salazar." Of course, I didn't follow his order.
He's
not the boss of me.
"You have the keys?"
"Nasa akin. Ako na mag-open," I heard K answered.
"I'll put her to bed ha?"
"Don't! Huwag kang pumayag, Kim!"

"Sure! Mas okay na sa kwarto niya siya magsuka bukas kesa sa sala!" Kim said,
chuckling.
"Ugh. Traitor!"
"Ayoko lang maglinis ng suka mo, L!" she said.
When we got inside the apartment, Kade didn't realize his misstep until it was too
late.
"Wait! Alam mo yung room ni L?" Kim asked, her voice laced with suspicion.
I heard Kade cleared his throat. "Uhh... I remembered she came out from here
kaninang umaga, right?"
"Ohhh. Okay."
I sighed. "Nice save," I grumbled when we got inside my room.
He lowered me to the floor, but he made sure my body would rub against his body.
"Perv."
Kade chuckled. He held my face with both of his hands. "You're smashed, babe."
"I know, right?" I rolled my eyes.
He grinned. "We'll just tell them tomorrow."
About us? Bukas? "Pwede namang huwag na muna," I said with a pout.
Kade glared at me. "Wait for me. We'll talk later," he said. Shit. Nabadtrip yata
because of my big and stupid mouth.
I thought he's gonna let go of my face na but I just found myself kissing him bago
siya umalis. Damn. Ang bilis talaga.
I was still standing in front of my bedroom door when it opened. Kim was looking at
me weird.
"What?"
"Bakit nagkalat yang lipstick mo?"
I gasped and covered my mouth.
"Uhm, ano... Nginugngod ko yung face ko sa likod ng shirt ni Kade kanina nung buhat
niya ko!" I stuttered.
K squinted her eyes at me. "Sabi mo e," she said before she stepped out of my room.
Shit. Sana gumana ang pagka-slow niya or yung pagiging senile niya. Please. I hope
she won't remember it tomorrow.
***
I was already sleeping when I felt my bed sink. I opened my eyes and saw Kade
sitting on top of my bed. And he's undressing!
"What are you doing?" I asked, eyes-wide. Shit.
"It's too damn hot here. Why won't you open your AC?" he asked as he wiped his
shirt on his sweaty body.
Holy.
Tacos.
I sat up and covered my chest with my arms. I'm only wearing a white tank top and
no bra. "I forgot e. After I cleaned up, I slept agad."
"So you didn't wait for me, huh?"
"I'm drunk, Kade. What do you expect?" I argued.
He just smirked before he circled his arms around me. He pulled me to him and I
went willingly. I straddled him and sat on his lap. "We didn't get to enjoy each
other's company earlier," he said, looking up at me.
"We'll make bawi on my bed, huh?" I teased him as I wrapped my arms around his
neck.
"We will," he said before he claimed my lips. His tongue immediately sought my
lower lip. I opened my mouth and let him in. I moaned and squirmed when he sucked
on my tongue. I bit his lower lip after.
He pulled away from me, chuckling. "You're so fucking hot."
"And you're so hard." I grinded on his lap to prove it. Oh, he was hard as rock.
Kade nipped my chin with his teeth. "Stop or you'll regret it," he rasped.
I kissed his lips. "Who says I'll regret it?"
An idea popped into my head.
"I have an idea."
"Uh-oh," he teased with a grin.
"Give me a month bago umamin sa friends natin-"
"No."
"You haven't heard what's at stake pa!" I argued.
"Why the heck are you so scared? Are ashamed of me?" he asked, his tone hinted that
he's irritated. "I'm not a fan of waiting game, Louisse." I cringe when he used my
name with a biting tone.
I held his face. "I'm not ashamed of you, Kade. I'm just not ready yet."
He kept his mouth shut but his eyes did the talking. He's mad and a little bit...
hurt.
"We'll admit it din naman. Hindi lang ngayon." I kissed his lips. "Please don't be
mad."
He just gave me a curt nod.
"Wanna know what you're in for if you accept it?" I asked, the liquid-courage doing
it's damn job.
"What?" he asked, eyeing me warily.
I smiled at him. I pulled from his shoulders and pulled the hem of my tank top. I
did this while watching his face. Kade swallowed loudly.
And then, I did something na magagawa ko lang talaga if there's an alcohol in my

system...I pulled my tank top off.
Kade just stared at me.
"Second base, Kade," I grinned at him.
=================
Chapter 22: Splat
Chapter 22
Splat
Eight Months Ago...
I woke up with a jolt. It was because of the warm and heavy arm draped on my
stomach and a warm hand on groping my left breast. My exposed left breast.
My eyes widened when the memories last night came crashing through my brain. Oh my
God. The things his hands and mouth did. HOLY TACOS! The unbelievable things my
hands did!
I tensed when equally naked Kade Ongpauco pulled me close against his chest. I
squeezed my eyes shut when I felt his breath fanned against my nape.
"Having regrets?" he whispered in my ear with his morning-after, raspy voice.
"Did we have sex last night?" I asked, my eyes still closed. I winced at my loud
voice. It made my head start throbbing. Shit. I have hangover pa.
Sore and hangover. What a terrible combination.
Kade made me roll-over and face him. I scowled seeing that half-smile, half-smirk.
"No."
"Are you sure?" I asked, dubious.

Kade scoffed. "Of course."
I squinted. "I'm kinda sore."
Kade smirk widened. It made me want to slap it off his face. "Well, that's major
league second base to you."
I felt my face and my ears heat up. I covered my face with both hands. "Oh my
Gods," I groaned. Kade just chuckled.
I pulled my hands off my face and glared at him. I propped myself on my elbows.
"Promise me, the next time I get drunk, you'll stay away from me."
Kade leaned back, offended. "What the fuck? You think I'll take advantage
of you? Violate you?"
My eyes-widened., horrified. He got it all wrong! Hindi yun yung pino-point ko!
"No! I don't mean you! It's me! I'm the one who will do the violating!" I
explained, panicking.
Kade may be an ass at times, but he respects women.
I noticed he was staring at me weird. "What?" he asked, his frown looked adorable.
"I'm a hardcore drunk flirt, okay? Baka next time we'll go straight to home run
na," I explained, exasperated but at the same time, embarrassed.
"Okay," he shrugged. Ganun lang kadali? Really now?
I raised my right hand and showed him my pinky finger. "Let's pinky swear on it."
Kade choked on his laugh. "What? No."
"Dali na! C'mon! Don't laugh at me!" I punched him with my free hand.
Kade shook his head. "No way, Salazar. I'm serious."
"I'm serious, too! Pinky swears are sacred!" I hissed at him.
Kade burst into laugh. I immediately covered his lips with my free hand. "Shut up!
They might hear us!"
He just shrugged. I squealed when he bit my palm. I was about to pull it away when
he caught my wrist. Our eyes met when he pulled my hand and kissed the part where
he bit my palm. I shivered.
Shit. You're too smooth, Ongpauco.
I pulled my hand away from him and shoved my other hand on his face. "Pinky swear!"
I said awkwardly.
Kade smiled lazily and finally, he relented. "Pinky swear, babe," he said.
Bago pa siya mag-change ng mind niya, I hooked my pinky finger to his much bigger
pinky finger. I blushed when I remembered
what he did to fingers last night.

"I'm liking this pinky swear shit," Kade teased when he saw my flushed face.
"This is sacred!" I scowled at him.
Kade grinned. "I know."
***
Gong Xi Fa Cai, Ongpauco!
Xie xie, babe.
I bit my lower lip to fight the urge to squeal. I can't afford to do that lalo na't
kasama ko si Kim. Wala si Jamie dahil nag-date sila ni River somewhere. Nag-
celebrate yata together ng Chinese New Year.
Hindi ba nagsi-celebrate together ang Ongpauco family?
Busy? I texted him again.
He replied immediately. Nah. Bored af
Halata nga. Ang bilis mag-reply e! Is he not in a party mood? Or he's not partying
at all?
You're not celebrating?
His text came within seconds. Don't wanna see my dad.
Oh. I don't know what to say. Though I can relate to his family problems, I still
don't know what to say to him. I'm not even sure if I'm in the position to say
something at all.
How abt, "Can I come over?"
I grinned at his new text message.
Can I come over?
Yes, please.
I almost texted him 'brb dying'. Shit. Why am I acting like a teenage girl who has
a huge crush?!
"Huy! San ka pupunta?" K asked when I jumped off the couch.Nagma-marathon kasi kami
ng Once Upon A Time at season 3 palang kami.
"Uhh...
Nag-text yung groupmate ko! May emergency meeting daw," I said as I ran towards my
room. I released a huge sigh of relief when I got inside my room.
Liar, liar pants on fire.

***
I got to his condo unit an hour later even though his building was just two blocks
away from ours. Just like what I always say to J, 'It's better to arrive late than
to arrive ugly.' I really need to stress that out. They would always say kasi na
makupad akong kumilos.
"Yo, babe," Kade said when he let me in to his condo unit. He stole a kiss when I
went past him. I rolled my eyes at him and he just swatted my butt with his towel.
"I'm just gonna take a shower. There's pizza in the fridge," he said.
I frowned. "I don't wanna eat pizza muna. Sawa na ako. Do you have anything else?"
"What? Did I hear you right? You? Sawa na sa pizza?"
"I don't know. Go take a look. If you want you can call for a Chinese take-out?" he
grinned.
"Okay. I'll take a look first in your pantry."
When I got into the pantry, my eyes bulge. It's almost empty! What am I gonna eat
now? Kahit junk food wala. Meron lang isang pack ng bread, cheese, cereal, lenguine
pasta, condiments and herbs.
Oh. Perfect! May pasta and herbs! Basil
I'll cook pesto na lang!
I prepared the ingredients and the cooking materials that I'm gonna use. Buti na
lang kahit papano may makakakain sa pantry niyang empty. Kung wala, matagal pa
hihintayin namin sa take-out.
I was chopping the herbs when my clumsiness took over.
The knife in my hand slipped and it sliced my left index finger. "FUCK! SHIT!" I
shouted. I raised my damaged finger and stared at the blood oozing from the wound.
I didn't know I was chanting 'blood, blood, blood' until Kade was in front of me.
"What the fuck happened?" he asked. His hair still has suds and he's dripping wet!
The only thing that kept his privates unexposed was his towel.
Kade took my hand and put my index finger in his mouth. He sucked it so hard I
yelped.
"Why are you sucking it?!" I asked, horrified. "It will only get infected!" I
pulled away from him.
"I panicked, okay?" he snapped.He took my hand and again and dragged me to the
sink. He opened the faucet and let the running water wash my wound.
"So you just turn into a vampire when you're panicking?" I teased him.
Kade chuckled. "It was the first thing that popped into my head and I thought it
made sense."
I shoved him playfully. Kakaiba rin siya mag-panic.
"Where's your phone? I'm gonna order na while we're tending to your wound."
I pointed at my phone near the sink. He grabbed it and typed me passcode. "How the
hell did you know that?"
Kade smirked. "I pay attention, Salazar," he said as he dialed on my phone. I felt
my face heat up. Fine. Siya na nagpi-pay attention. Ako na kinikilig.
Ugh. Stop it, L.
I watched him as he talk through the phone. He dictated our orders as he squeezed
my finger and gently washed it with running water.
"Hey! My towel's slipping!" he yelled.
Without thinking,
I grabbed it with my free hand. "Shit! Why am I holding this?!" I sputtered, my

eyes wide as saucers.
I was gonna let it go when Kade yelled at me. "Don't you dare!"
"I'm touching your dick!" I yelled back, still horrified. I'm not holding his dick
but it's pressed on knuckles!
Kade scoffed. "It's not like you haven't seen or touched it before!"
My cheeks and ears burned as the memories of our 'major league' second base moment
flashed into my head. Gods, until now I can't believe that I gave him a handjob!
I was gonna cuss him when I felt his thing twitched. "Seriously?" I groaned at him.
Ngayon pa talaga siya nagka hard on?
Kade burst into laughter. "You're such a girl." I glared at him. Insult ba yan sa
kababaihan? He showed me his half-smile, half-smirk. "Stay there .I'm just gonna
dictate my address."
Oh, great. The operator must've heard us talking-yelling about his dick.
***
"So, we got Beef Wanton Soup, Pork and Shrimp Dumplings, Miki Bihon, Shanghai
Rolls, Sweet and Sour Fish Fillet and Tikoy!" I said as I brought each food out of
the brown bag packaging. "Ohh! There's two fortune cookies!" I said in amazement.
Ngayon na lang ulit ako makakapagbukas ng fortune cookie. And I wonder if

nakakatawa, nonsense or relate kami whatever it is na nakasulat sa loob.
I took one, yung pinaka malayo sa akin and cracked it immediately.
You will find your true love today!
I think my eyebrows went up until it reached my hairline. "Well, that's random," I

said staring at the paper in my hand.
"What does it say?" Kade asked. I looked up and... paused.
Oh my Gods. Brain, you fucking stop it.

I got shock when I felt the sudden increase of my heartbeat. Shit. Why am I
palpitating? Hindi naman ako uminom ng coffee! I looked up again. And shit, I
thought it was impossible but my heartbeat increased its pace even more!
"Baby, are you okay?"
Oh.
My.
God.
"Splat," I blurted.
Kade looked at me, confused.
Shit. Nahulog na ako.
"'Splat' what, babe?" he asked.
I just stared at him. I can't believe this. I'm really feeling... feelings!
"I think I just..."
"You just...?" He leaned closer. My eyes widened.
Fuck! Hindi ko maintindihan!
"You just what?" he persisted.
"Fell," I gasped.
Kade didn't say anything. He was just staring at me. I can see he's still confused.
Ako din, Kade! I'm so freaking confused! But-I'm kind of liking and hating this
feelings at the same time!
Oh my god. I really do have feelings for him now.
"Are you sure?" Kade suddenly asked.
I stared at his face. He's smiling. I haven't seen this smile before and it's
making my heart do flips! His eyes were twinkling and he looked so relaxed and
so... relieved.
Holy tacos.
Did he really waited for this moment?
I answered his question with a single nod. His smile widened.
"Good," he said before he claimed my mouth with his.

=================
Chapter 23: Horrible Jokes
Chapter 23
Horrible Jokes
Seven Months Ago...
Cascade Ongpauco
17 new text messages
With only one eye opened, I started reading the string of his text messages. I felt
my face split into a grin when I saw the first one. Iba talaga ang effect when the
first thing you read is a good morning text message from your special someone. And
you know what's more nakakakilig?
His first text was sent 3:16 in the morning!
Hindi ka ba kikiligin nun knowing that you're the first person he remembered to
text when he woke up? 3:16 AM pa! If that was me, baka nakatulog lang ulit ako.
Good morning, gorgeous.
Babe, you watching super bowl?
Hey, sleepyhead.
BABE! WAKE-UP!
Yoda is here. She's a hoot
Wish you're here too
What the hell, babe. Your team sucks.

Seattle 22-0. Halftime.
Denver is fucking embarrassing
29-0
36-0
Seattle 43-8!!!
Yoda and I won. Haha!
Just won 30 thousand. Pizza date?
Hey! We have a bet too, right?
And you lost again, babe.
When can I claim my prize?
I totally forgot about it! Kaninang umaga pala yung Super Bowl XLVIII! It's 1:19 in
the afternoon na! Obviously I overslept na naman at hindi nagising sa alarm ng
phone ko. Fuck. Absent
na naman ako sa mga klase ko. Tapos hindi ko pa napanuod yung Super Bowl ng live.
Buti pa si Kade. No wonder he woke up that early. Super Bowl lang naman yung
pinaka-kinababaliwan ng mga katulad ni Kade na football varsity players! I remember
one time he told me one of his wildest dreams is to receive a Heisman trophy.
It was indeed a wild dream. He will never have one because he's obviously not
eligible for that.
Where are you?
My brows raised up to my hairline. Why is he texting me kung nasaan ako? Paranoid

kasi hindi ako nag-reply?
Just woke up. Still in my bed.
Seconds later, I received a reply from him. Hindi talaga uso sa kanya yung
naghihintay ng 3-5 minutes bago mag-reply. I smiled at the thought. I think that's
one of the things I liked about him. He's very decisive. He knows what he wants and
he'll do whatever it takes to get it.
Good. Open your window. It's locked.
I gasped after reading his text message. I sat up and looked at the window. True
enough, I can see his shadow through the curtains.
I jumped out of bed and ran towards the window. I shoved the curtains and unsnapped
the locks. I grinned at Kade as I pushed my window up. I stepped back and watch him
enter through my window.
"Hey there, sleepyhead," he said as he circled his arms around my waist. His head
was about
to descend to mine when I remembered I haven't brushed my teeth yet!
I covered his mouth and his nose, for good measure. I pushed him a little. "Morning
breath," I told him. I turned my back on him. I was about to took one step when I
felt a stinging pain on my butt. I looked back at him with a shocked expression.
"Did you just slap my butt?" I asked in disbelief.
Kade showed me his half-smile, half-smirk. "I had to," he said with a shrug.
I glared at him before I went to the bathroom. I almost shrieked when I saw my
reflection in the mirror. Oh my Gods. I look terrifying!
I have a horrible bed hair, my eyes are puffy from sleeping and I have muta pa! I
looked down and saw my clothes. I'm wearing my old Gryffindor House shirt and my
super tiny na boxershort. As in yung pangutlog purposes lang talaga na boxershorts.
Shit. No wonder he felt the need to smack my butt earlier. But thank God, naalala
kong hindi pa ako nag-toothbrush! Dagdag humiliation yun!
Ugh. Makapaghilamos at toothbrush na nga lang.
***
"What are you doing here pala? Wala kang class?" I asked the moment I stepped out
of the bathroom. He was sitting at the edge of my bed. I went to him and he pulled
me to his lap. I have no choice but to straddle his lap.
"I'm here to claim what's mine."

I wrapped my arms around his neck. "And what's that?"
"You."
I grinned at him. "Seriously, ano nga?"
He grinned back and pulled something
from his back pocket. He raised it near my face. "Please watch my away game this
Friday?"
It was a ticket to his away game.
I looked back at his face and saw his sweet pleading smile. Gods. If someone told
me seven months ago that I'll be sitting on his lap as he ask me to watch his game
for the very first time, baka natawanan ko pa siya with matching sipa on the face.
My heartbeat tripled its pace.
Fuck. Here we go again.
I swallowed loudly and smiled suggestively, trying to cover my nervousness. "Make

me," I told him before kissing his lips.
I squealed when Kade lied down on his back and rolled over. I found myself
underneath him. "Make you, huh?" He smiled devilishly. "Oh, I will."
And then the asshole tickled my sides to death.
"OH MY GODS! STOP-IT... YOU ASSHOLE!" I yelled at him between bouts of laughter.
Thank God, already left for her work.
"Tell me you're coming first!" he yelled back.
That and his hands on my side made me laugh even harder. "Tha-that's what he s-
said!"
Kade burst into laughter. "Tell me you're going! You're going, right?" he asked
when he recovered.
"MAKE ME!" I screamed-laughed.
Kade used his elbows to tickle me harder. OH MY GODS! IT HURTS BUT I CAN'T MAKE
MYSELF STOP.
"STOP! STOP!" I screamed but he continued.
"Say you're going first!"
I was in the middle of laughing my frigging ass off when the unthinkable happened.
I let out a really, really, really loud fart.
Kade stopped
and for the first time, I saw his eyes almost popped out its sockets.
"Did you just...?" he trailed off.

Mortified, I just looked at him with a horrified expression.
Oh, dear God, please take me.
Before I could answer, Kade started howling in laughter. I pushed him away from me
with both my hands and feet. He rolled over and landed on the floor. But he didn't
mind. He just continued to laugh.
Ayoko na talaga. Ayoko na.
This is so humiliating!
***
In the end, I ended up having an admit-one ticket to their away-game against the
University of the Eastern Philippines - Black Falcons and his car keys. He wanted
me to drive his pick-up truck. UEP is on Quezon City kasi and he didn't want me to
drive that long with my Mini Coop. What's the problem with my car? Hindi pa nga
nag-iisang taon si Leo!
Yes, my car has a name. Same with my phone, Freddie, and my laptop, Logan.
One of the reasons din pala why he wanted me to drive his pick-up truck, gusto
niyang sabay na kami pauwi. Hassle daw to have two-cars. If I know, he just wanted
to have a driver. I'm sure he's super tired to drive home after playing in the
field.
Kaya kanina, he had to ride a taxi to go to school. He had to wake-up earlier para
maiwasan yung traffic at hindi maiwan ng university bus na magdadala sa kanila to
UEP.
"GO, GRAY WOLVES!!!" Wow, even though we're here at the Black Falcon's territory
ang dami at ang lakas pa rin ng support sa team namin.
"I
LOVE YOU, ONGPAUCO!" Okaaaay.
"MARRY ME, VICTORINO!"
"ANG POGI MO 21!" 21 meaning Cascade Ongpauco. I know, right? He looked more
attractive today, to be honest. What with his game-face on and him wearing his
football gear.
"DESTROY THEM, KADE!!!" sigaw ng isang lalaki. Wow, fan boy much?
And destroy he did.
The score was 45-14! In favor of Kade's team!

Holy tacos, he was a monster in the field.
I think I need to change my underwear after watching that game. It was so

exhilarating watching him in his zone! He was just so damn... hot.
Lalo na yung moment na he scored a 69-yard touchdown? Oh my gods. I almost fell

from my seat! I was at the edge of my seat the whole game! I didn't expect that it
was that fun watching a football game. In fact, I'm still high from the adrenaline!
I was waiting for Kade near at the entrance of the dug-out. I know I won't be able
to go down because of the railing. But I just want to congratulate him immediately.
"Hey, miss!" said the guy that's nearing the dug-out. He's from the Black Falcons.
Is he referring to me? I'm not really sure.
"Hey, miss. What's your name?" they guy asked when he reached me. Umm, okay.
"She's not interested," said the guy behind him. I immediately recognized his
voice. It was Kade!
Kade made his way to me and-oh my gods! He kissed me! In front of the whole crowd!
Oh no.
Oh no.
Oh, dear God no.
Holy tacos.
There's media everywhere! Baka kumalat to sa uni!
"Kade!" I gasped at him, in shock.
"Wait for me in the car." And then he just left!
THE NERVE OF THAT GUY!
***
I was waiting for him at the back of his pick-up truck when I saw him coming over
with his friends. I jumped down and just stared at him as they get close. My
pokerface is on. Why? Because I'm starting to get confused again.
I got kilig of what he did earlier. It was obviously a proclamation. But at the
same time, it was like he was pissing at me like I'm his goddamned property. And I
hate that kind of shit. Lalo na't we have an agreement na hindi muna namin
sasabihin kahit kanino yung namamagitan sa amin.
And now, shit, it may spread like wildfire in the uni.
The five of them stopped in front of me. Kade went beside me and put his arm around
my shoulder. "Salazar, these are my teammates. Gio Victorino," he pointed at the
buff-looking dude. "Jake Cruz," he pointed at the super gwapong guy beside
Gio."Grant Atwood," I know he's one of the linebackers. "-and Ryan Chen." He
pointed at the chinito dude.
"Guys, she's my girlfriend, Louisse Salazar."
NO.
FUCKING.
WAY.
He did not just say that.
Even though inside I'm spewing every curse words I know at him, I still managed to
smile at them and exchange pleasantries. We didn't talk that long because the
university bus was about to leave na.
"Girlfriend?" I asked him, annoyed.
"Hey, don't get mad. It was just a joke," he said with a grin.
A joke.
It was just a joke.
Joke lang pala yun and I'm acting all pissy just because of a stupid joke?
Joke lang sa kanya yun while inside I'm confused as all hell?
Nakuha niya pang mag-joke after the stunt he pulled earlier?
I took a deep breath and stared at him blankly. I took his car keys out of my
pocket and put it in his hand. "You know what, talk to me when you're done making
horrible jokes, okay?"
"Hey, Salazar! Wait up!"
I walked out on him and hailed a cab. I told the cab driver my grandma's address in
La Loma. Kade wouldn't think na duon ako didiretso.
I sighed. Did I overreact?
Hindi naman siguro. I'm entitled to get hurt and pissed-off, too.
=================
Chapter 24: In Shambles
Chapter 24
In Shambles
Seven Months Ago...
Fine, I admit I overreacted.
After a week, I realized that I let my emotions and hormones take over my sanity.
Masyado akong nagpadala sa confusion and somehow my pokerface let me down. What has
happened to me?
And after all the over-thinking, I also realized that I can't blame him for making
those kinds of jokes. But a head's up would have nice, right? Yes, it was my choice
to keep it a secret and siguro he can't wait or something...
Fuck. I don't make any sense.
Why did I let myself get crazy over a guy?
I sighed as I stared miserably at the cake I'm trying to make. Last night, I have
decided to make amends with him. But knowing Kade, papahirapan ako nun. Ikaw ba
naman, hindi ka pansinin for almost one week? Talagang papahirapan niya talaga ako
dahil pinahirapan ko rin siyang ma-reach ako.
I ignored all of his texts.
I dropped all of his calls.
I avoided him in the uni.
If I blame my hormonal imbalance because of my period, para ko na ring bliname yung

sarili ko indirectly. My hormones are still mine, it's me. Kaya, yes, I am blaming
myself.
And I'm not making any sense na naman.
Oh my gods. I'm going crazy over my very mababaw na fight with him. Ever since that
dude entered my life, he made it chaotic. It really felt like my heart and my life
were in shambles.
And I miss him already.
God, do I miss him.
groaned. "Why won't this work?!" I scowled at the heavy whipped cream in the silver
bowl. I've been beating it for like fifteen minutes now but it won't set into soft
peaks! Ang labnaw pa rin!
Ano bang gagawin ko dito?
Shit. I didn't know na mahirap palang gumawa ng refrigerated cake! Oreo cheesecake
na nga lang, hindi ko pa magawa! This is his favorite pa naman. Every time we go to
coffee shops, he's always looking for Oreo Cheesecake. I'm hoping that this will
help me to get back on his good side. Bribe, gift, peace-offering... whatever you
call it! Basta I want him to like this!
But first I need to figure out how to do this shit.
Valentine's Day na rin tomorrow and sweets are a requirement, right? I don't
normally care about this Hallmark holiday but now that I have a misunderstanding
with my non-boyfriend, I thought I need to do this too. I need to do this shit for
him.
I would've cooked him my favorite dish, aka pesto pero he wouldn't appreciate it.
He knows that it's the only thing that I can cook. I can't even do the gisa-thing.
I hate frying because I freaking hate boiling oil. Almost all of the canned goods I
ate were just heated in the microwave.
If not for Jamie, matagal na akong deads over the unhealthy way I eat. Siya lang
kasi marunong magluto talaga sa aming tatlo. Kahit weirdo yun, she knows how to
cook naman.
Shit! This shit will never set!
I read the instructions again and again and again. I stopped when I noticed one
word.
'Chilled'
'Chilled' whipped cream!
The whipped cream
I used was in room temperature!
GAH. Why didn't I notice it earlier? Am I that distracted? I can't even comprehend
a simple damned baking instruction?!
How will I give him a proper apology when I can't even accomplish making my peace-
offering?
***
Hmmm... Basil... Damn it, it smells so good.
I can get used to this, waking up in the smell of basil leaf.
Gosh. My stomach 's grumbling and I can feel my drool rolling down my cheek.
My eyes opened when I heard a loud thump. I gasped when I saw Kade standing at near
my bed, holding a food tray. I sat up straight and wiped the drool on my cheek.
Shit! Dyahe!
"What are you doing here?" I asked, eyes still wide in shock.
Kade smiled... nervously? I don't know. He looked uncomfortable pero ang hot niya
pa rin e. Gah! Brain, please focus na. Please?
"I'm here to apologize," he said before he put the food tray on my lap. "Nothing
says 'I'm sorry' more than a breakfast in bed, right?"
I felt my cheeks burn. "Brunch na, Kade," I said with a small grin. My mouth
watered when I looked down at the tray on my lap...
Pesto Pasta with Chicken strips!
"Oh my God! You cooked my favorite!" I said in awe-oh shit! He stole my thunder!
"Wait! Hold this! I'm gonna get something lang!" I said as I gave him back the
tray. I ran towards the kitchen and went straight to the fridge.
I almost forgot about the Oreo Cheesecake!
When I got back to my room, Kade's already sitting on my bed. He
smiled at me and patted the mattress, signaling me to sit beside him. I did.
"I made your favorite, too," I said to him, handing out the whole Oreo Cheesecake
and a fork. He took it with a smile.
I placed the tray on my lap again and started to dig in on my Pesto Pasta.
I moaned when I took my first bite. "Oh my goodness," I sighed. It's so good! So
perf! He sure can cook! Kahit na I can still taste the mouthwash I took kanina sa
kitchen, the taste of the pesto still overpowers it and it still tastes so damn
good.
I looked over at him and saw him staring at me. Ayaw niya ba tikman yung ginawa ko
for him? "Eat it!" I said to him, waving my fork at the cheesecake. "Ayaw mo ba?" I
asked, brow arched.
Kade smiled that nervous smile again. "It's not that I don't wanna eat it. I just
wanna look at you first."
With that, I felt my cheeks burn again. "I missed you, Ongpauco," I said, lowering
my guard.
"I missed you, too... and I'm sorry for what I said last week." I looked away from
him and nodded. "I do and say stupid things when I'm panicking. I rarely panic and
that says something, Salazar. " I know that. I only saw him panic once; it was when
I sliced my finger when I tried to cook for him.
"I hate it when guys make a pass at you and I hate it even more that I can't tell
anyone that you're mine."
Oh my gods. He panicked when he say that dude from UEP and when he introduced me to
some of his roommates.
"When I saw the look on your face when I introduced you as my girlfriend? I got
terrified.
I thought you're gonna dump me right then so I said the most stupid thing." He
chuckled mirthlessly.
"I overreacted," I admitted with a frown. "I'm sorry for walking out like that."
"I hated the days we're not together, seriously." Kade grinned, his shoulders
visibly squared. Parang nawala na yung weight that it carries.
"Yeah? Because you missed my face, right?" I teased him. I smiled at him, the
floating, suer-nakaka-high na feeling came rushing back to me.
"Sobra."
"I missed hearing your voice, Kade. I missed talking to you every day."
"Then, it's a good thing we're okay na, right?" I beamed at him. "Go ahead! Dig in
na!" I pointed at the Oreo Cheesecake. He smiled at me before he took the fork I
gave him earlier.
He dug in and shoved the fork in his mouth. He stilled and I watched him swallow
it. I was mesmerized at the way his Adam's apple bobbed.
It made me gulp too.
"How was it?" I asked.
"Sarap," he immediately said. Really? Bakit parang galing sa ilong?
I shrugged it off and handed him a coke-in-can na kasama sa food tray na binigay
niya earlier. He opened it immediately and took a huge gulp.
Grabe ha! He's really thirsty! Siguro sa kaba. He should've told me kanina pa.
"Salazar?"
I looked back to him. "Yes, babe?" Shit. It just slipped!
Kade grinned but didn't comment at my slip. He must've noticed the way my face
reddened.
"Before I forget to say it... I just wanna say that being away from you for a week
made me realize something, too."
That made me stop and made me look at him. I dropped my gaze from his reall, really
intense stare. Shit. Saan nanggaling 'yan? His tone made me nervous.
I just stared at the cheesecake I made for him.
"What's that?" I asked.
"I love you."
I stilled.
And I did the stupidest thing... I took a huge scoop from the cheesecake and shoved
it in my mouth.
WHAT. THE. HELL.
My stomach rolled and I jumped out of bed. I spit it all on the toilet bowl. I took
my mouthwash and I gurgled twice.
Kade was still laughing his ass off when I came back to my room. "What the hell,
Kade? It tasted horrible! Why would you lie to me?!"
He shrugged. "We just made up. I don't want to hurt your feelings again," he said
as he handed me my coke-in-can. What he said made me feel all mushy and shit. Holy
tacos, just like that.
"I can't even stomach that. It tasted like shit." I frowned at him and he just
leaned in, making our foreheads touch.
I closed my eyes and sighed, trying my hardest not panic. "You really do love me,
huh?"
He kissed me on the forehead."Happy Valentine's Day, love."
=================
Chapter 25: Too Late
Chapter 25
Too Late
In case you wouldn't talk to me, I wrote you a letter.
Forgive me if I'm not good at this, but I'm desperate enough to do this.
I'm sorry for putting you on the spot last week. I was stupid. I panicked and
blurted out the first thing that popped into my head.
I understand if you want to take a step back but I'm hoping you won't. Because if
it was just up to me? I would have told everyone already that you're my girlfriend.
It wasn't a joke. I know we're not yet official so it isn't true, too. It will only
be true when you're ready. You know I'll wait for you, right? I'll wait for you,
always.
- Ongpauco
But you didn't.
A sad smile... and tears. Whenever I indulge myself reading this letter, watching
our vlogs and reminiscing about the past, it always makes me smile and cry.
Torture? Yes. And I deserved it. Aminado ako dun.
Yes, we ended bitterly pero I'm not the kind of person who forgets the good
memories. Sobrang dami nun e.
Dito palang sa room ko? Sobrang daming memories. He left small pieces of him here.
Ang dami niyang bakas dito.
Here in my bed, we always made out here.
In my closet? He hid there when Kim almost caught us.
In my bathroom? We showered together there.
That damned window? It served as his entry in our own little bubble.
I sighed remembering my first Valentine's Day na may ka-celebrate na special
someone. I'm glad it was him. Wala mang flowers, chocolates, big gestures, cheesy
harana or what...
I wouldn't trade it for anything. Kade, Pesto and that horrible Oreo Cheesecake,
I'm contented with that.
I shook my head remembering that Oreo Cheesecake. Instead na Cream Cheese ang
nailagay ko, mayo pala. Yuck, right?
And I remembered din the lengths we went through para makapasok ng apartment. My
window was locked that time. I didn't know he was coming over kaya it was locked.
He had to knock the door and lie straight to Kim's face about his agenda. She let
him in and left immediately because she was gonna go home in Pampanga that time.
I'm glad she did.
I'm glad that most of my first were with him.
"Knock, knock!" I heard Jamie's voice and her loud knocks from the other side of my
room. I jumped out of my bed and went to the door. I opened it and let her in.
"L! Pupunta kami ni River sa Japan next Friday! Kagabi niya lang ako niyaya!" She
jumped into my bed. "Dadalhin niya ako sa Star Wars Convention dun! Tapos kung
suswertihin baka pati sa Wizarding World!" She clapped like a retarded seal.
I just look at her with an amused expression. I'm happy for her, mukhang okay na
talaga sila ni River and it's just a matter of time for them to get back together.
"Don't you have a review?" I asked when I remembered she's gonna take up a
licensure exam on October.
Jamie beamed at me. "Louisse, Anakin Skywalker 'yun! Darth freaking Vader!" she
said like it was a good enough reason. "At isa pa pinagpaalam na ako ni River kina
Tiger Lily! Tsaka kailangan ko nito! Fried na fried na brains ko," she said
dramatically.
I rolled my eyes.
"Samantalang nung February,
kailangan pa kaming mag-cover up para sa'yo ha? Tapos kami pa nag-pack ng things
mo." I sat beside her. "Sasagutin mo na ba ulit?"
Her smiled widened, if that was even possible kasi super big na ng smile niya. "If
he asks, sasagutin ko na ulit."
"Tapos ka na magpahirap?" I teased her.
Her smile wavered. "He's been through a lot... and mahal na mahal ko siya e." She
smiled again but it was a sad smile. "Kahit anong gawin ko... hindi ko na yata
kayang i-give-up siya e."
She knows. She knows about the Ongpauco secret and she stayed.
River's really lucky to have her.
And even though he'd been a douchebag to her before? I forgave him. He talked to me
when he came back after his car crash. I understood him. I felt what he had felt
when he broke up with Jamie. I knew the place he had been. I knew that suffocating
feeling he experienced and the loss... man, did I felt that loss.
But that broken man? He was much better than me kasi nalagpasan niya almost all of
his issues and he came back to her. He groveled. He crawled his way back to Jamie.
He worshipped the ground she walked in. He showed her how much he love her and that
he can't live without her in his life.
I just hope totoo ang sinasabi ni Jamie. She can be fickle-minded sometimes. I hope
they won't give up on each other no matter what happens.
"Uy! Dude, nag-text si Andrew!" Jamie said as she waved my phone in my face. Shit.
I always find myself spacing out these past few days.
I took my phone from her and read Andrew's massage.
Let's hang-out!
Where?
I replied.
Lulu's Coffee Shop
"Kamusta pala yung date niyo ni Andrew? Nakalimutan kong itanong! Busy kasi!" she
blabbed.
I shrugged. "I decided na hanggang friends lang kami. I'm not ready yet."
Jamie frowned. "Sayang. Gwapo pa naman ni Andrew kaso hindi pa rin kinabog si
Kade." She shook her head and muttered, "Grabe siguro genes ng tatay nila. Sharp-
shooter ang leche."
I bit my lower lip to stop myself from laughing. I don't think she realized she's
thinking out loud and that I could hear her.
I cleared my throat. "Get out na! I'm gonna get ready."
"Akala ko ba ayaw mo kay Andrew? Bakit ka makikipag-hang-out?" she asked in

confusion.
I looked around my room and everything I see has a trace of him. I don't think I
can spend another minute here without crying over the love I have lost.
I smiled at her. "We're going to hang-out as friends, don't worry. Now, shoo!"
***
I was about to go inside Lulu's Coffee Shop when a hand grabbed my arm. I looked at
the guy who's dragging me. It was Kade.
I started to feel the panic creeping in my veins. I'm not scared of him. I'm scared
of myself. "What the hell are you doing? Get your hands off me!" I hissed at him,
trying not to make a scene.
His jaw was clenched and his shoulders were tense. "You left me no choice,
Salazar." Oh, now he's calling me Salazar again? We're back to that now?
He dragged me until we reached his pick-up truck. "Get in," he ordered after he
opened the door.
"Why should I?" I asked as I tried to pull away from
his tight grasp. "You're not the boss of me."
Kade didn't respond. He just pushed me inside the shotgun seat and buckled me up.
"This is kidnapping, Cascade. You're a PolSci major, you must know that," I taunted
him.
Gods, he's so irritating.
"I don't fucking care. We're going to talk." He slammed the door shut and run
towards the driver's seat.
What the hell just happened?
Shit! Si Andrew!
I took my phone out and texted Andrew. I'm so sorry. A fucking caveman decided it's
a good day to kidnap me.
Yeah. Saw it from inside.
Why didn't you come out?
Now where's the fun in that?
Good luck, you'll need it.
Gago talaga!
Screw you.
"Who are you texting?" I jumped at Kade's biting tone.
"Just drive so we can get this over with," I answered without looking up from my
phone. Andrew stopped replying na. Gods. I'm starting to hate that guy.
"So you have time to see him?" Yeah, at sa'yo, wala. I didn't open my mouth.
"Goddammit, Salazar! What am I gonna do to make you talk to me?"
I looked up and glared at him. Anong karapatan niyang mag-demand? "Can you not take
a hint? I ignored your texts, your calls... any invitation to talk! I don't wanna
talk to you again!" I told him as calmly as possible. I'm shaking with repressed
anger.
"But you know I'll fucking lose my mind if you talked to Andrew! And you did! You
two are now dating!" He looked at me as he stopped the car at the red light. "Are
you revenge-fucking him, Louisse?"
I flinched.
My
jaw dropped. "Of all the things you'll accuse me, how dare you?" I sputtered,
offended. "If there's someone who's capable of cheating, that's you and you damn
well know it!" I sneered at him before I looked away.
Gods. Ang sakit nun.
Kade rubbed his face, ashamed at his outburst. "Fuck... I'm sorry, Salazar," he
said, his voice tired and apologetic.
I kept my mouth shut the entire drive. We didn't talk until we reached the Rooftop.
Shit. Ngayon na lang ulit ako nakabalik dito.
I unbuckled my seatbelt and climbed out of his truck immediately. I don't think I
can take it if he touched me again.
We moved towards the setting sun. There was a distance between us. Three feet. But
it felt like we're... miles apart. I guess, that's for the best.
"What do you want to talk about?" I asked after a minute. I can't take the
deafening silence anymore.
I heard him sigh. "Everything. I want to talk about everything."
I just nodded. Everything? Including the incident in Davao? The Sabrina thing? The
Elevator thing? Our almost 'relapse?'
"About what happened in Davao..." he trailed off.
I cleared my throat. "I forgot about it already." Which is somehow true, I'm
getting good at the thought-blocking thing I learned from Jamie's psychology books.
"Salazar... we almost-"
I interrupted him with a raised hand. "But we didn't and nakipagbalikan ka sa

kanya."
"You know I'm forced to be with her!" he said in exasperation.
And with that, my carefully built walls cracked and I just exploded. "I don't know
anything, Cascade! You know why? Because you won't tell me everything and I'm so
fucking done with that!"
At first galit na galit ako sa mga nangyari sa Davao. Everyone thought na sobra na
yung nangyari with Sabrina pero hindi nila alam that some things happened pa that
night! Only Kade and I know those things and we decided to forget about it kasi
tapos na kami.
Kaya nga for a while there, I considered getting back at him with Andrew. Because
even if I'm done with all this shit, I'm still in love with him and I'm still so
fucking mad! At sobrang nasaktan ako na kaya niya akong sabihan na kalimutan lahat
ng nangyari.
I have never been so confused with everything I believed in my life. My family,
Cascade... Myself. Hindi ko lang maamin sa sarili ko.
I guess, I'm getting good at being a hypocrite too.
"Ayoko na talaga, Cascade," I said, defeated.
"I broke up with her, Louisse," he said after a few minutes.
I closed my eyes and took a sharp breath. Please, don't fucking cry. Please. Stay
strong, L.
I swallowed the huge lump in my throat. I looked back at him and stared at him with
a blank expression. He knows what I'm doing. "And you think that makes everything
okay?" I snapped.
Kade took a step closer but I stepped back. "You chose her over me and you know
damn well I needed someone who will never stop choosing me."
Kade's eyes glistened. "But I choose you now," he said, his voice hoarse.
A single tear fell from my eye. "Too late, Kade. I have already given up on you."
=================
Chapter 26: Mother Hen
Chapter 26
Mother Hen
After our talk, I asked Kade to drop me off to the apartment. He obliged. While on
the way, he tried to engaged me into conversation but I just kept my mouth shut.
Eventually, he got tired and just stopped talking.
I thought he would really just drop me off, just like what I told him. But of
course, he's Cascade Ongpauco, you wouldn't know what he's thinking. He'll just do
whatever he wants to do.
I didn't mind it. Somehow, even though I basically told him I'm done with him, I
just let him do it. After all, this will be the last time na makakasama ko siya.
"You can go now," I told him when we reach our apartment's doorstep. I fished my
keys from my pocket and unlocked the door.
I was about to enter when Kade grabbed my arm and whipped me around. I looked into
his eyes and seeing how intense they were made me stop breathing. "I'll never give
up on you." He tried to kiss my cheek but I moved away, his lips landed on my hair.
"Not now, not ever."
And he left me standing there, shocked.
As I closed the door, tears started to pour. I've longed for those words for a long
time ago to the point na nakalimutan ko na nga. But hearing it now? I didn't know
it will hurt me more.
I am not a cry-baby. Pero ever since he came and left my life, lagi na lang akong
umiiyak. I thought, grabe na yung nakita k okay Jamie when she cried about River
nung nagbreak-up sila. I was worse than her pala nung nag-break kami ni Kade.
Everything can set me off. The water works were always on.
***
Five Months
Ago...
River Ongpauco is now single.
View more comments...
WHAT. THE. EVER. LOVING. FUCK.
What the hell is going on?
I clicked the comments section and read some of the new comments.
Jake Cruz Dude... What did you do?!
Gio Victorino Tsk, tsk. Man...
Kimberly Joy Talavera What?!
My stomach dropped when I saw Jamie's relationship status update. They have really
broken up.
I commented, 'WHAT THE FUCK?!
I mean, what do you even comment seeing that? Is there a proper comment? It's
beyond shocking!
I startled when I heard J's shrill voice. Someone's here... Or may kausap siya sa
phone. Either way, she's upset and hearing her proves what I just saw on my
newsfeed.
River Ongpauco broke up with her.
I heard a deep voice murmured its response to her.
"Hindi ko na alam kung anong iisipin ko! Bigla na lang siyang nakipagbreak out of
nowhere! He wouldn't give me any valid reason! He broke up with me through phone
call! Hindi siya ganun! I know he's not a freaking coward! Pero bakit nakipagbreak
siya sa akin ng hindi personal?"
I felt my heart clench when I heard J's sobs. It was heartbreaking to hear! He was
her first love! And he broke her heart into pieces!
I immediately changed my pajamas as I listened real heard to J's company. Masyadong

mahina yung voice niya! Even Jamie's voice lowered. Who is she
talking to? Who's comforting her? I know it was not Kim because she's at her work.
"But why would he break up with me over the phone? Ganun na lang ba ka-worthless sa
kanya? From being his princess, I was treated like dirt. Parang he couldn't even
spare me a glance dahil ayaw na niya talaga sa akin. He couldn't even spare me his
precious time para mabigyan ako ng matinong break-up at closure. Bakit?"
I went out of my room after hearing J started screaming and crying again.
"Ja-" I stopped dead on my tracks. What the hell is he doing here? "What are you
doing here, Ongpauco?" I asked him, glaring. I don't have a good feeling about
this. His brother just broke-up with my best friend. I don't think he's here just
to comfort her. They're not even close.
"I'm here to pick-up River's car," he answered. I can tell he's a bit annoyed.
I knew it. He was doing River a favor.
Unbelievable. That ass had the gall to break-up with her and he can't even face
her?
I looked over at J. "We can break his car's windshield," I suggested. She looked at
Kade and he just looked at her. He's not objecting.
"He was an ass to you. He deserves it, J," I persisted. I need it too. Because I'm
so freaking livid. Napaniwala niya kaming mahal niya si J and he would never do
anything to intentionally hurt her.
My hopes for a well-deserved revenge deflated when J shook her head. "I refuse to
be a bad person dahil lang sa ginawa niya."
I fought the urge to stomp my feet. This is not a time to be a fucking
martyr! He just broke your heart!
"That son of bitch is so damn lucky," I grumbled as I struggled to keep myself

calm. "Where's his keys? Just give it to him para he could leave na. Baka ako pa
makabasag ng windshield because I'm so livid right now!" I said, seething. Gosh.
I'm really tempted na basagin lahat ng windows ng Mercedes Benz ni River. But J
won't let me!
"Nasa may drawer sa bedside table ko," she said as she wiped her nose with the hem
of her shirt. I went to her room and get the asshole's car keys.
"Get out now, Ongpauco," I told Kade after giving him the car keys. I went to the
front door and opened it, signaling him to leave. I don't care if it's bastos or
not, I just want him to leave us alone.
He stood up and looked at Jamie. "For what it's worth, Jamie, I'm just here, okay?"
he said to her before patting her on the head, something that he's probably done to
Ozi and Bay. Medyo nawala yung irritation ko sa kanya after seeing that little
gesture.
I was about to close the door when he looked back at me. "I'm sorry," he mouthed.
Wala naman siyang kasalan yet he's apologizing to me. Dahil kay Jamie at River ba?
Or because I'm having a bitchfest?
I sighed and nodded before closing the door gently. Seeing Jamie's puffy eyes and
sobbing made my heart clench. Ganyan ba talaga kapag hiniwalayan? Parang wala
namang indication na maghihiwalay sila. Yes, nagkakatampuhan sila the past few
weeks but its normal for couples to have few petty fights, right? I didn't expect
it will end up in a break-up. I know there's something
deeper in there.
Maybe sa side lang ni Jamie 'yun?
But what about River? I know saglit lang sila but there's freaking depth in their
relationship. Can people really just throw away something other people longed for?
Jamie leaned her head on my shoulder when I wrapped my arms around her. "As much as
I want him to give the benefit of the doubt, hindi ko kaya. I wanna kill him! Dapat
pinabayaan mo na akong sirain yung kotse niya!" I told her, my eyes seeing red.
Gah. I'm fucking furious.
Sana iba na lang sinaktan niya! Not Jamie. She doesn't deserve this pain. She loved
him so much. Ang daming taong naghahanap ng ganung klaseng pagmamahal and some
asshole just decided na he'd had enough? Na pwede niyang ibasura yung taong mahal
na mahal siya? Na okay lang paiyakin yung taong yun? Na it's freaking fine na
hiwalayan yung tao na yun ng biglaan?
I stood up and paced. I can't keep still!
"Pano mo ba nalaman na wala na kami?" J asked, her voice small.
"I saw it on my news feed. He's single na ulit." And it shocked the shit out of me.
Pulling my phone out of my pocket, I browsed on my newsfeed. I scroll down and
stopped when a photo of two people engage in a heated kiss.
I gasped when I read the caption and to whom the photo was tagged.
HOLY. TACOS.
Moving on real fast, RO?
"Putang ina," I growled, my hands shaking in rage. I can feel my eyes stinging. I
can't believe this shit.
"Louisse?" Jamie's small voice made me stop.
looked at her and felt my heart squeeze so hard. How can he do this to her?
I can't do this to her. I can't let her see this but it will only hurt her more
kapag sa iba niya pa nalaman. I know seeing this photo will change her for good.
The pain will change her.
I know after showing this picture, I will no longer see her innocent eyes, her
smiling lips, her happy-go-lucky, quote-spouting self.
"I'm so sorry, Jamie," I said, handing my phone to her.
Jamie reached for it without hesitation. She took a deep breath to prepare herself.
I know nothing will prepare her sa makikita niya. She looked at it and stilled.
I winced seeing her unmoving state. Tears were rolling down her cheeks. It was
uncontrollable. Sunud-sunod. And then she just sobbed.
I went to her and hugged her tightly. "Ang tanga-tanga ko!" she wailed against my
neck.
"No," I told her, crying. "You're too good for him, Jamie. You're way too fucking
good for him."
***
After three weeks, graduation came. Kade and I didn't get to spend some time
together because of the last-minute graduation preparation and the lent season. I
got myself busy babying Jamie after she collapsed on my arms after crying for
hours.
For almost a week, I comforted her every time she felt like crying. We binged-eat
tons of lasagnas, pizzas and ice-creams. I swear, I gained like 5 lbs after that.
We had Star Wars movie marathons kapag gising siya and not sleeping. I guess she
didn't wanna feel the pain kaya itinutulog na lang niya
lagi.
I got tired seeing her like a zombie so I decided to bring her home in Cavite. I
can still remember vividly what we had talked about on our way there.
"You know it's not the end of the world, right?" I asked her after taking a glance
at her. She looked so sad. I haven't seen her smile or laugh ever since she saw
that damned photo.
She didn't respond right away. It was evident that she's in deep thought.
"I know," she said, her voice tired... defeated. Fuck. I'm still not used seeing
her like this. The goofy girl was gone.
"You'll tell Tita about this?" I asked knowing na kahit she's too strict sometimes,
she's one of the wisest women I know. Maybe Tita Lily can give her advises or words
of wisdom or anything that can help her kid.
J shook her head almost immediately. I just shrugged. If she's not ready yet, its
okay. She can only move on to her own pace. Focusing on the road, I can't help but
wonder... What if I get heartbroken just like her? What if something bad happens to
me and Kade in the future? Will I screw up? Will he screw up? Am I gonna be like J?
Just moving through the motions? Living like a dead person?
Is Kade capable of doing the same thing River did? Can he move on that fast too?
Can he throw away what we have now? Kaya niya ba akong saktan deliberately?
I don't know that. Pero I know na I have given him the power to hurt me. He's
become important to me. He's become a fixture in my life.
It feels different when I'm with him. Somehow, I forget my problems and I just feel
like
floating. When we kiss, my knees weaken and the butterflies in my stomach won't
stop fluttering. When I'm with him, I'm happy and contented. It sounds cliché but
it feels light but at the same time its... explosive.
I have fallen in love with him.
I love him, too.
There. I said it.
It's real now. Hindi na lang siya word na 'splat' or 'fell'. I just admitted to
myself without any euphemism. Totoo na talaga. I admitted it to myself in the
realest way.
And I can't believe how shitty this is. I realized how much I'm in love with
Cascade Ongpauco while I'm in my car with my heartbroken best friend. The same best
friend na niloko ng kapatid ni Kade.
Shit. Magkaibang-magkaiba sila.
Between the my bitchfest and J's waterworks, she managed to tell me some issues she
had with River that she didn't confront right away. River never told her he loved
her. She thought it was enough that he's shown his feelings through his actions.
She thought that maybe he's still afraid to say it because they're still a new
couple. Three months palang.
And that's the thing that made me feel guilty. I had doubts before but I didn't
speak up because I know she's happy. It was a whirlwind romance. Everything
happened too fast.
"Ang sakit-sakit pala kapag natapos ang isang relationship," she said out of the
blue. I glanced at her. "Sa paningin siguro ng iba, ang OA ko. Pero ang sakit kasi
biglaan e. Akala ko parang first hurdle lang yung pagiging cold niya. Akala ko yun
yung tipong misunderstanding na matatapos naman kapag
pinag-usapan ng mayos." Jamie's voice started to break. "Hindi pala ganun. We were
on the verge of a break-up na pala."
She wiped her eyes angrily.
"If I had known he'd end things like this? Sana pinigilan na kita nuon. But you
were so happy that time." I felt her stare bore into me. I kept my eyes on the
road. "Even though you won't say it out loud, I know you want us to be happy for
you. So I kept my mouth shut nung I thought he was kind of... off. "
"Anong ibig mong sabihin?"
"Everything just happened too fast. You just met him, muntik ng may mangyari
between the two of you. You got mad at him for several weeks. Then you talked,
tapos ayos agad. The next thing I know, you're hanging out with na. Tapos
kinabukasan you're exclusively dating." Imagine my shock when I learned about it.
But like what I said, I kept my mouth shut. She was happy.
I shook my head, remembering my countless advises to K and J. "Hindi pa nga nagsi-

sink in yung thought na you two were exclusively dating, tapos malalaman ko na lang
na kayo na officially. It was too fast. Sobrang whirlwind."
I took a deep breath. I know masasaktan siya sa sasabihin ko but she needs to hear
it again. She will need it when the time comes that she will date another guy. I
kept my mouth shut before and look what she got into. I'm her best friend and the
'mother hen' in our trio. She needs to hear honest advises from me.
"I told you before, diba? Alam niyo to ni Kim. Guys like challenges."
And she wasn't.
I just hope that I am
a challenge to Kade. Because if I wasn't? Kayang-kaya niya akong maisasantabi o

matatapon. Kasi ang mga pinapahalagan ay iyong mga pinaghihirapan.
I snapped back into reality when I felt my phone vibrate. There was a text from
Cascade Ongpauco. I smiled as I read it.
Where are you?
Still here inside PICC. Congrats, Mr Cum Laude!
Thanks, babe. Are your parents here?
Yeah.
You okay?
This will only take a few hours. Kaya pa.
You got this.
Thanks.
No worries. Congrats and I love you.
Should I say I love him too?
Nah. Now is not the right time and I'm not comfortable saying it for the first time
through a text message.
I'm just gonna tell him the next best thing.
I'm proud of you, Cascade Ongpauco.
***
"Where's Annabeth?"
I jumped in surprise when Lake's face was in front of me.

"Get out of her face or else." I can't help but chuckle when I heard Kade's
threatening voice. Lake just grinned at him.
"I'm just looking for Annabeth. Utos mo yun diba?" he asked in a childish voice. I
shook my head in amusement.
"She's not here. Go find her somewhere else." Kade pushed him to our opposite
direction.
"Fine,
fine. Ikaw na magsabi kay Louisse ng plan." And then Lake went away.
"Plan? What plan?" I asked when Kade looked back at me.
He sighed. "My good-for-nothing brother asked for a favor," he said, his brows
furrowed. It's obvious he's not comfortable asking in behalf of her asshole
brother.
"Wow. He has the gall to ask favors?" I asked in disgust.
Kade sighed again. "It's for Yoda." I just stared at him waiting for him to
continue. "He knows what he did was to her was shitty. He wanted her to go in a
vacation with us."
"What? He's bribing her now?" Wala na bang katapusan yung pagiging shitty person ni
River?
"He knows he's not good enough for her and he wants her to move-on-"
"I agree with him. He has a brain din naman pala." Albeit small.
"We can go anywhere. All-expense paid." Kade shrugged. "Jamie can pick wherever she
wants to go."
I shook my head in disbelief. I can't believe that pompous ass. "I can't believe
he's sponsoring his ex's moving-on trip." Crazy fucktard.
Kade chuckled. "Calm down, baby," he said before stealing a kiss from me.
I gaped at him. Really? Hindi makapaghintay?
"Go ahead and find Kim. I saw her earlier with Jamie's family." I nodded, hindi
naman masamang sumunod sa utos niya paminsan-minsan. "Anyway, Jamie and Kim can't
know about this."
I just nodded. Another secret to keep. "Fine. I'll ask for their permission. J
really needs a vacation."
I was about to leave when Kade pulled me against him. "What are you doing?" I asked
when I felt his arms cricled around me. Why is he hugging me in front of our
batchmates?
"I missed you," he said when he buried his face on my neck. I was gonna push when
he kissed me there. It made me still.
Oh my gods. Those freaking butterflies are at it again!
"Kade, not here," I whispered at him.

"Didn't you miss me?" he asked, pulling away though he kept his arms around me.
I smiled at him. "I missed you. Sobra," I assured him. "But I'm not a fan of PDA."
Kade grinned. "Me, too." He squeezed me with his arms around me. My smile went
wider. Hindi ka lang makatiis na hindi ako mayakap. Admit it, Ongpauco.
"Meet me in your room later?"
"For privacy?" I teased him.
"Yep. 'Cause my girl hates PDA," he teased back.
I punched him playfully. Kade laughed.
Shit. I need to go find Kim and J's parents. Baka umalis na sila! I need to ask for
their permission pa baka hindi pa matuloy yung vacation ni Jamie. "I need to go
now! I'll see you later!"
He just answered me with that half-smile, half-smirk and a single nod.
=================
Chapter 27: Hot Spring
Chapter 27
Hot Spring
Five Months Ago...
I was about to fall asleep when I felt my phone vibrate in my hand. With one eye
opened, I tried to read the text.
Meet me in the lobby?
My eyes widened. It's already 1:13AM! Maaga pa kaming aalis bukas papunta sa
Laguna! Tsaka inaatok na ako dahil sa sarap ng dinner namin sa Dencio's kanina. I'm
so freaking full and my swine reflex is kicking in.
We all decided to stay the night muna sa isang hotel dito sa Tagaytay. Maulan kasi
and the fog was too thick. Almost zero visibility na sa roads! We didn't want to
risk it and we're all tired, especially Kade, our designated driver.
Kaya nga we have to sleep early and rest. But based on his text message, mukhang
sleep will have to take a step back for the two of us.
Right now? I replied after sitting up.
Seconds later, his reply came.
Yeah.
I looked around the hotel room and assessed the situation. Jamie's lying on her
stomach, her drool pooling while Kim's covered by a comforter up to her chin,
sleeping peacefully. Will these two wake up if I move? They're tired from the drive
and they're both 'tulog-mantika'.
I better go na. I'll just move like a ninja.
I grinned at myself. The situation is too silly. Hindi na ako teenager para mag
sneak-out. But I feel so excited and thrilled! Medyo heady sa sobrang taas ng kaba
and
excitement.
I hope they would not catch us.
He was lounging at the couches in the lobby. He looks bored. "Missed my face?" I
asked when I took a seat next to him.
Kade grinned at me. "Heaps." He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and pulled me to
him. I leaned at his shoulder willingly.
He's warm and sobrang lamig ngayong oras na to. Open-area ang lobby and nakapasok
ang fog. Medyo weird yung ambience but it adds to the excitement of being caught.
"So why did you wanna see at this time?" I asked, tilting my head to the side.
He was still smiling at me. "I can't sleep."
I pouted, nag-iinarte. "But I was about to."
His grin didn't waver. "I'll let you go in one condition," he said while his free
hand was playing with my hair.
He'll let me go na? That kind of made me disappointed. But I'm more curious with
his 'condition.'
I squinted at him. "What is it?"
"I realized why I couldn't sleep..." he trailed off. I just stared at him. Get on
with it. "I haven't kissed you today."
"Oh." My eyes were wide with surprise.
Kade smirked. "Yeah.'Oh.'"
I'm just slightly confused. He has the right naman because we're 'exclusively
dating.'
Ah, shit. Hindi pa pala. We haven't DTR yet.

But even without the labels, I know we're way past the 'exclusively dating' phase.
Like I said before, he's my 'non-boyfriend'. And if ever he asks na, I don't think
makakatiis pa ako at mag say ng 'no'. That is if he asks.
I mean, I'm
in love with this dude.
Bahala na. I'm sure we'll cross the Determine-The-Relationship' bridge when we get
to there. For now, we're just gonna wing it.
"So you want to kiss me?" I asked reluctantly.
"Every day," he answered almost immediately.
He's too full of himself and that made me giggle. Shit, I don't freaking giggle.
"Okay." I shrugged. "Kiss me now."
And gods, did he kiss me.
***
The morning after, we decided to tour Tagaytay kahit saglit lang. After all, its
Kim's first time to be there. We went to Our Lady of Manaoag at Tierra de Maria and
took tons of pictures. We ate our lunch at the Sky Ranch and chilled at the nearest
Starbucks there.
Jamie decided to go to Laguna and we all went with it. Para sa kanya naman tong
'moving-on trip' and sponsored to ng ex-boyfriend niyang asshole aka Lord
Voldemort.
All of us agreed to go to a hot spring resort. We all needed to relax and we're
going to take advantage the hot springs. Minsan lang kami mapapadpad dito.
I took a deep breath as I closed my eyes. Fresh air. Super different from Metro
Manila's polluted air. I'm excited din because later, we're going to become one
with nature.
Did I mention I love these kinds of trips? I love adventure and I love nature even
more!
I opened my eyes when I heard Kim and Jamie's loud voices. Papalapit na sila sa
akin. They stopped dead on their tracks when they saw me. I almost rolled my eyes,
buti napigilan ko.
They're wearing a
white shirt and denim shorts over their one-piece suits. Na-shock yata ang mga
soon-to-be nuns sa two-piece bikini ko.
If you got if, flaunt it, right?
I led them to the hot spring. Kahit na hindi ko alam kung saan, madali kaming
nakapunta duon because of Lake's loud voice.
Kade and Lake stopped talking when they saw us. Lake whistled, looking at me with a
teasing grin. Kade backhanded him on his stomach. And his look... Gods, if looks
could kill, I would've been burned there alive. His smoldering gaze was too damn
hot!
I calmed myself and looked at my grinning friends. "Let's swim?" I asked, keeping
my face and voice neutral.
They nodded and slowly dipped their toes at the hot spring. "Shit! Ang init!" Jamie
gasped.
I chuckled as I slowly dipped my toes. I watched my two friends make a fool of

themselves. Minsan talaga nakakabilib yung pagiging naïve and innocent nilang
dalawa. Lalo na si Kim.
"Oh my God! Napapaso yung tiyan ko!" K squealed later when she was waist deep in
the hot spring. Jamie and I laughed.
I shook my head in amusement. I stifled a gasp when I caught Kade's stare. Kanina
pa ba siya nakatingin?
He gave me a single nod. That's my cue para lumapit sa kanya.
"I'll leave you guys here. I know kailangan niyo ng alone time," Lake's voice
startled me. I looked at him and that's when I noticed that my two best friends
left us already!
I squealed when Kade's arms circled around my waist. I faced him and look at his
smirking face. "They might come
back!" I told him.
His smirk didn't waver. "So what?"
"We might get caught," I deadpanned.
I tensed when Kade leaned close. "I don't fucking care." His lips claimed mine
unexpectedly. I gasped, my eyes wide open. His hands found the back of my neck,
making it sure I won't be able to escape his lips. My hands grasped his arms as I
closed my eyes and surrender myself to him.
Kade growled against my lips as he kissed me with a furious need. I bit at his
lower lip, demanding entry. My breath got caught in my throat when his tongue met
mine. It felt every part of my body was burning, burning with the need to touch
him.
Kade's hand lowered and grabbed me at the waist, his other hand stayed at the back
of my neck. He pulled me closer to him, making my breasts press against his hard
chest. I felt a flush spread in my chest, making my nipples hard.
I could feel his hardness pressed against my thigh. My moan was muffled by his
lips. My hand wandered it way to his waist and it went lower.
Kade stilled and so did I.
Kade kissed my lips ins his own teasing way before he moved his lips away. Our
foreheads pressed together, my eyes still closed. I struggled at the disappointment
I felt. Shit.
We're in public and we went that far.

I tried to calm myself. Shit. Hindi pa rin ako makahinga ng maayos.
"I'm sorry," Kade rasped.
Still with eyes closed, I just nodded.
Kade chuckled.. "Don't wear this bikini again if you still want your virginity
intact."
opened my eyes and gasped. Kade burst into laughter. Sinadya niyang biglain ako sa
joke na 'yun!
I punched him on his arm. Fuck! Masakit 'yun!
"Asshole!" I sneered at him.
Kade wrapped his arm around me. "Just saying the truth, babe. You're making me hard
wearing those."
Ano nga ulit yung tawag ng mga cousins ko sa Tondo kapag nag-aasaran sila about
their sex lives? Aha!
"Tigang!" I said before moving away from him. I stuck my tongue out for good
measure.
Kade chuckled. "And it's your entire fault."
***
I slept on Kade's shoulder the whole plane ride going to Bohol. Kade didn't mind.
He just played on his iPad the whole time. We shared his earphones as we listened
to the playlist he made for me seven months ago.
Gods. Ang tagal na rin pala nun.
I can't believe we made it this far. And I know mas sasaya pa kami lalo sa
pagtagal.
I smiled at the thought. Nahuli tuloy ako ni Kim and she gave me an appraising
look. Ano kayang nakikita niiya through her tipsy four-eyes?
Until now, I can't believe it na napapainom na namin siya. Siguro dahil kay Lake?
I ignored her gaze. "Who's next?" I asked. We're playing Never Have I Ever and
every single one of us now has a strong buzz. Kade and Lake bought hard liquor and
potato chips for pulutan. Wala na raw kasing convenience store na bukas. Sari-sari
store lang ang open about two blocks away from where were staying.
"Ayoko naaaa. Tutulog na ko," K said as she stood up. She dove into her bed and
didn't
move.
I looked at Jamie. "Tulog na din ako!" she said, crawling to her bed. Successful
naman siyang nakahiga sa kama.
"I guess it's just the two of us." My eyes went to Kade.
"Lake's still he-oh." Lake's already sleeping. He's lying on his back on the floor.
"Let's finish this?" Kade asked, the bottle of Absolut in his hand. Wala pa sa
kalahati yung bawas. It's our third bottle.
I shrugged. Sayang naman e. "Okay, then."
Kade poured the glass na medyo mataas sa usual na iniinom namin. About three-
fingers yata.
He swirled alcohol around the glass. "Wanna play dares?"
Dangerous. What a dangerous guy.
I squinted at him. "Dares while they're sleeping?" I asked, referring to our

friends.
"Scared, Salazar?" he smirked.
Ako? Scared? "Bring it on," I said with a smug smile. He doesn't know how my brain
works when I'm this drunk. He's dead.
"Lick your toes," he challenged.
My eyebrows shut up to my hairline. He wants to play that game, ha? Fine.
I stood up and went to the bathroom. "Hey, where are you going?" he asked.
"Bathroom. I'm gonna wash my feet." I looked back at him before he start
protesting. "Loopholes, baby. Loopholes."
After that, Kade and I dared each other with ridiculous dares, verbalized with
carefully chosen words. And he's good ha.
He made me do a handstand against a wall. I almost cracked my skull open and he

just laughed. Of course, bumawi ako.
I dared him to do a split. Oh my gods, I think I cried so hard dahil hindi ako
makatawa ng malakas. Kade ripped his shorts. I swear to God, I won't forget his
face when it happened. I was literally on the floor, laughing without a sound.
Snorting until I farted.
I didn't mind. Mas nakakahiya siya.
Kade tackled me on the floor, I ended up lying back on the floor underneath him. He
leaned closer and blew raspberries on my neck. "Stop it you, asshole." I slapped
him on his back, giggling.
Kade raised his head. He was smiling his drunk, lazy smile. Sometimes, these kind
of moments just kicks you in the gut. Masakit na masarap yung feeling. I don't want
this to end.
"I don't want this to end, too," Kade said when he buried his head on my neck.
Shit. I'm thinking out loud once again.
Minutes later, he started snoring. I chuckled as I hugged him. "I love you, you
idiot."
=================
Chapter 28: Pinky Finger
Chapter 28
Pinky Finger
Four Months Ago...
"I thought we're gonna take a stroll?" Kade asked when I pulled him into his room.
Thank gods, Lake left us earlier. He decided to take a stroll on his own. Maybe
pag-iisipan niyo yung trip na ginawa niya kay Jamie. Maybe pag-iisipan niya kung
paano naman magpapa-cute kay K. Either way, I'm happy he left us. Kami na lang
dalawa.
It only means one thing... quality time. And by quality time, I mean make-out
session.
I didn't get the chance na mag-usap masyado kahapon sa Bantayan Islands kaya
ngayon, I'll make it sure we talk... or not.
I grinned at him. "It's just the two of us. Are we not gonna take this
opportunity?" I asked him before pushing him para maglakad na siya papunta sa bed.
When we got near the bed, I pushed him with all my might. He got surprised by my
actions.
He arched a brow. "Eager, are we?"
I crawled on top of him and sat on his lap. "You have no idea," I said before
leaning down, our noses touching.
I felt his hands glide on my legs up to my sides until it reached the back of my
neck. Kade gave me a light smacking kiss. "Lemme gues, you miss me already?" he
asked with that gravelly voice of his.
I felt the hairs on the back of my head stood up. Is it possible to miss someone
kahit magkasama naman kayo? It doesn't feel bad pero it doesn't feel good too. Yung
gustung-gusto mong palaging may physical contact kayo like hand-holding or akbay.
To think I hate PDA ha and I feel sad not
doing it now.
Now na I have confirmed to myself that I am indeed in love with this dude.
I have said it out loud already. I woke-up pa nga na nervous that time. Did he hear
me? Did he fake his sleep? Faked his snores? Or maybe ayaw niya lang pag-usapan?
But why? He already told me that he loves me.
Why am I over-thinking this? Baka naman tulog talaga siya nun.
"Hey." I snapped out of my reverie. "You spaced out on me."
I chuckled. "Sorry," I said half-heartedly.
Kade tsk-ed me. "Shit. I'm losing my touch, huh?"
One minute I was on top of him, the next I found myself underneath him. "You won't
space out on me again." Kade kissed me deeply and I moaned the moment our tongues
touched. I circled my arms around his neck and followed his lead.
I arched my back when his one of his hands went inside my shirt. His hand grazed my
stomach, making it clench too tight. I wrapped my legs around him and he ground
against me. I pulled my lips against him and groaned. His lips trailed on my chin
down to my neck. I gasped when I felt a stinging sensation. I heard him chuckle
before he soothed the sting with kisses and licks.
My hands are fisting on his shirt on his back and I'm squirming against him, trying
to find that release he could only provide me. His hand palmed my left breast and
massaged it through my bikini top. I arched my back again and moaned as his lips
trailed my collarbone and my chest.
I heard him groan as he pulled away from me. I opened my eyes and watch him pulled
the my tank top off of me. I grinned at him as I pulled the strings of my bikini on
the back of my neck. Kade showed me his half-smile half-smirk as he watched me
lower my bikini top on my stomach.
"Damn, baby," he growled before attacking me again.
His lips found my neck and he nipped and sucked until he reached my chest. I
watched him give the left part of my chest a soft kiss, his eyes not leaving mine.
His eyes remained staring at me as his lips lowered and eventually hovered against
my hard-
We both jumped in surprise when we heard a ringing phone. Kade pulled away from me
immediately when something vibrated between our thighs. I sighed when I realized
that it's his phone.
What a cock-blocker.
Kade sat up and pulled the phone off his pocket. I noticed him clench his jaw when
he saw who was calling. "What the fuck do you want?" he growled at the person on
the other line.
I sat up and fixed my bikini top. I wore my tank top na rin. I can't help but feel
disappointed. Ngayon na lang ulit kami nagkasama ng matagal at makakaabot sa stage
na yun. Damn him/her kung sino man siyang tumawag. No, I know hindi importante kung
sino tumawag because looking at Kade now? Mukhang papatay ng tao dahil sa badtrip.
Well, ganun siguro talaga kapag nabibitin.
"No, she's not with us." He was shaking his head, a look of disbelief in his face.
"Putang ina." WHOA. My eyes widened. He's really mad.
"You broke up with her and now you want fucking hourly updates?!" he growled. "No,
River! I'm your fucking
ahia and I don't fucking care if you sponsored this fucking trip!" That's one too
many curse words. Wow.
"Why am I fucking mad?" Kade laughed humorlessly. "Gago ka ba? You broke up with
your ex! You made her miserable! She's moving the fuck on, River! Just concentrate
on your goddamned training! You're not supposed to care, right?"
I sat beside him and touched his arm. He glanced at me and just like this, he
calmed down. His eyes softened when he saw me smiling at him.
Gods. Butterflies, stop or I'm gonna murder you all.
"Stop calling, okay? I'll just text you whenever I feel like it. Don't be a fucking
douche." His verbal assault softened because his tone is different now. Parang
pang-asar na tone only older sibs do.
"You fucking cock-blocked me. What do you expect?" he snapped. I felt my cheeks
heat up. I know that they, the Ongpauco brothers, know about us.
Kade dropped his phone on the bed then faced me. "You okay,babe?" he asked with a
concerned expression.
Kailan ba hindi kapag kasama kita? I beamed at him. "I'm okay naman."
He looked at his watch. "Fuck, we're about to eat na," he said, his voice
disappointed.
An idea struck me. Hindi ko pinahalata. I just pouted at him, pa-cute. "Too bad. I
wanted you to eat me now," I said, my voice mirroring his disappointment.
Kade's eyes almost popped out of their sockets. "What did you just say?" he
sputtered.
Hindi ko napagilan and I burst out laughing at his face. He scowled at me. I know
that look! He's gonna tackle
me and tickle me to death! Better escape now!
So I did.
I squealed and ran until I reached the front door of his hotel room. I heard him
running behind me kaya I ran faster. Shit! Si Lake and Jamie!
"Wala namang masama dun sa ginawa ko ha!" J said to Lake.
But it was too late, hindi ako nakaiwas or nakabalik papunta kay Kade. I stopped
dead on my tracks when Kade grabbed my left upper arm and at the same time, J's
eyes and mine met. She stopped talking the moment she noticed us.
Jamie's eyes widened. She headed over to me and grabbed both of my shoulders, her
wide eyes assessing me in panic. Shit! Hindi ako nakapag-ayos!
I looked like I just had sex! I'm so sure!
I looked at her with wide-eyes, silently pleading na sana hindi siya magwala in the
middle of the hallway. Please. Good gods. I can feel my heart pounding on my chest
too freaking hard.
"L, anong kinain mo at nagka-allergic reaction ka ng ganyan?" she asked, her

panicky expression turned to concern real quick.
Uhhh... What?!
I heard someone snickered. It was Lake.
"Tumigil ka nga diyan! Kita mong ina-allergy na si L!" sabi niya kay Lake. Her head
whipped back and her eyes found me again. "Ano bang nakain mo ha? You're lips are
swollen! Ang dami mong pula-pula sa leeg at dibdib!" she said, now looking at my
chest.
For the love of everything that is holy...
II can see Lake choking from his laughter. "Oh my God, L. What did you eat ba in
our room?" he asked with a teasing grin.
felt my cheeks burn. I looked away from Jamie and looked at Kade. 'Help me out
here, you idiot!' I hope my eyes said that clearly.
Kade scratched his head. "Sea food," he answered before grabbing my arm again. He
dragged me until we reached the door to my hotel room. He knocked and Kim opened it
immediately.
Nanlaki ang mga mata niya when she saw me. "OMG, L! Bakit ka in-allergy?!" she
asked in disbelief.
For fuck's sakes! Really?!
"Kumain ata ng panis na hotdog si L e," I heard Lake's voice from the back. "Ow!
Cascade!" I heard him growl. I have no doubt Kade punched the asshole.
"Fuck you, Lake," Kade snapped at him.
Lake sniggered again. "What, totoo naman, right, L?" Lake asked me with a teasing
grin. Kade was just staring daggers at him. "What, you didn't eat her tahong?" he
then asked Kade.
Kade slapped him on side of his head. "Knock it the fuck off."
Lake just raised his hand in mock surrender.
Phew! I don't know how we managed to survive that weird-ass situation.
***
Cinco de Mayo came. The booze were over-flowing, the irritating EDM music is on
full-blast and the crowd here at the yacht just keeps on getting wilder by the
minute. Bakit nga ulit ako sumama sa party na to? Oh, yeah. Kasi we haven't
experience Cinco de Mayo Boracay style. Though it feels pretentious, because admit
it hindi naman natin sinicelebrate or walang relevance sa atin ang isang Mexican
holiday.
Pero dahil nandito na nga kami, we can't pass it up. Lalo na yung tatlo, namely
Lake,
Kim and Jamie na mukhang addicted na sa Boracay scene. Day two we went to Jamie's
old boss's party and the day after that we went parasailing naman. Sobrang
nakakapagod but it was fun naman.
Medyo nakakabadtrip lang kasi... no quality time with Kade.
And here I am now, editing photos for my IG feed. I can't go next to Kade because
he's talking to an acquaintance, a female acquaintance. I'm the jealous-type pero
I'm not clingy. So even if I'm dying to go there, I kept my jealousy to myself. I
mean, anong mapapala ko?
"Uy, L! Anong ginagawa mo dyan?" I heard Jamie's voice but I didn't lift up my face
from my phone. Mahirap na, I might see Kade and his female acquaintance through my
peripheral vision.
She sat beside me.
"I'm editing photos," I answered lamely.
"Buti ka pa nakakapag-post," she whined.
Her tone made me look at her face. I saw her pouting. "Why not? Bawal ka?" I asked
before I looked down on my phone.
"Hindi naman sa bawal. Nakakainis lang kasi yung mga comments," she trailed off. I
whipped my head back to her. "May bashers na ako." She rolled her eyes.
Uhhh... What? Bashers? Paano siya magkaka-bashers? She's not a celebrity nor a
famous person.
"Seriously? Why?" I asked in disbelief.
I noticed her eyes had that faraway look for a second. "Two words: River Ongpauco."
I wanted to correct her that his name and surname are not words. But I stopped when
I noticed her shoulders sagged. I looked away from her. Naaawa lang ako sa kanya
when she gets sad. And she doesn't need
any pity. She needs support. Kaya ayokong makikita niyang maaawa pa ako sa kanya.
She need to gain her strength back.
I looked back on my phone and browsed on her IG feed. Lo and behold, there were too
many mal-educated bashers on her feed. "What the-?" I sputtered when I read one
below the belt comment.
What did she ever do to them? She was the one who got her heartbroken over-the-
phone and now she's the one who's getting bullied online?
Hindi dapat magpatalo si J sa kanila. She needs to show them that their opinion
doesn't matter to her. She needs to tell them to put shove their opinions on their
asses.
"You know what you should do?" I asked her. She shook her head. "Post more
pictures. Provoke them."
Jamie frowned. "Ayokong i-bash lalo!"

I rolled my eyes at her. "Mag-post ka o hindi, they're going to bash you pa rin.
The only thing you could do is irritate the shit out of them."
"Inisin ko lalo?" she asked in confusion. I affirmed with a nod. "Yung tipong
sinusumpa na nila ako kahit wala akong ginagawa sa kanila?" she asked again. I
answered with a nod again.
A smirk formed slowly on her lips. Atta girl.
But wait. Anong ginagawa ng good-for-nothing ex niya?
"River's not doing anything?" I asked, forgetting to use the codename. Bahala na. J
doesn't mind naman.
"Mukha bang may pakialam sa akin yun?" she asked in a sarcastic tone.
I sighed. If only you knew, J. If only you knew. Kaso I can't understand him He
left her heartbroken but he still obviously cares! Why would he
sponsor this trip and trouble his brothers to babysit and monitor his ex? But if he
truly cared for Jamie, why won't he address his rabid fans?
It doesn't add up. Something's wrong is obviously going on with his twisted head.
Pero Jamie doesn't need to know that. What she need is to move on from that
shithead.
***
Jamie's 20th birthday came and we decided to spend it on an island-hopping

adventure. We all agreed to eat dinner na lang for a quiet celebration. She didn't
even want to invite her old boss, Gabe. She just wants to celebrate it with us.
Which is fine by me. Kasi tomorrow? I'm gonna party hard for my 21st birthday.
We're walking at the shore while listening to the tour guide. Well, I'm hardly
listening. I got distracted with Kade na naka-white sando lang sa tabi ko. Kitang-
kita ko tuloy yung biceps niyang drool-worthy.
Oh my gods. Girly parts, behave.
"Like what you see?" Kade whispered to me as he stared ahead.
I grinned. "Always," I teased. Ang gaan sa feeling ng ganito. It's like I'm getting
high by the beach because I'm with him. Ang sarap ng fresh air and the sound of the
waves was just so relaxing.
I didn't hear him respond but I felt his pinky linked into mine.
"Hey, Salazar?" I heard him after a few seconds.
I looked back at him, our pinky fingers still linked. "Yeah?"
He smiled. "I love you."
I almost tripped. Thank God, I caught myself. Hindi pa rin ako sanay na marinig sa
kanya yun. But it feels so good every time he does.
"I love you, too," I whispered back with a grin.

Kade's brows rose up to his hairline. "Really?"
I giggled. Shit. I don't giggle. But this guy! He can reduce me into a giggling
mess!
Naalala ko yung nag one-on-one inuman kami sa hotel sa Bohol. "So you really didn't
hear me say it the night we got smashed? When you slept on top of me on the floor
sa Bohol?" I teased him.
His brows furrowed. He looked adorable being this confused. "No," he answered. "But
you did, huh? Why didn't you repeat it when I got sober the morning after?"
I just shrugged. Hindi ko alam ang isasagot ko. But I think he got what I was
saying because he just nodded. Which is weird, kasi I don't even know what I was
trying to convey.
I felt him squeeze my pinky finger with his. "So..." he trailed off.
"So what?" I prompted.
He asked with a hopeful smile. "Official?"
I beamed at him. Gosh. I wanna kiss that adorable smile.
"Yep," I answered while squeezing his pinky finger back.
=================
Chapter 29: Keycard
Chapter 29
Keycard
Four Months Ago...
"Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday, dear Jamie! Happy
birthday to you!" sabay-sabay naming kanta habang nakapikit si Jamie at nagwi-wish.
I noticed when she opened her eyes, medyo teary-eyed siya but she managed to smile
and blow her 20 candles!
We reached for her and hugged and kissed her. Nag-group hug pa kaming magbe-best
friends while two brothers took photos of us. I'll ask for copies later para mai-
post sa IG or Facebook.
I hope makita ni River para malaman niya na Jamie can be happy without him. And
what do they say about douchebags?
Oh, right. Hindi siya kawalan.
All of us settled down and took our seats. We're all starving and we can't wait to
stuff our faces with all of these food! Fiesta!
"Bibitayin na ba tayo bukas?" Jamie joked as she looked dreamily at a huge lasagna
platter in front of her.
We all chuckled at her childishness. "Start eating na! Uubusin ko yan!" Lake
threatened her.
She just stuck her tongue out in answer. I didn't mean to look at K but I saw her
look-away at their silly exchange. Hmm... Jealous?
"Ipapa-refrigerate ko lang ulit yung cake mo, J," said Kim. She raised her hand and
called the attention of our waiter. Nagbusy-busyhan pa? Smells fishy.
I just shrugged and naglagay na ng food sa plate ko. Good thing, hindi lang puro
lasagna ang nasa table. Meron ding pesto for me and Kade. Same ng
in-order si Lake and Kim, which is the baked ziti. There's two pizzas din,
meatlovers and New Yorker style.
"Anyway, what are your plans pala after this?" Lake asked Jamie.
Jamie chewed and swallowed her food first before she answered. "Board exam,"
matipid niyang sagot.
Lake looked at Kim. "You? Your plans, babe?" he asked.
Kim's cheeks burned and I hid my grin as I sipped my coke. "MBA," matipid din
nitong sagot.
Lake's eyes widened. "Really? Where?"
Kim blinked. "Sa DLU, of course."
Lake beamed at her. "That's awesome! I'll take my MBA at DLU too!" He reached out
and high-fived Kim, she obliged. "Sana classmates tayo. Sabay tayo mag-enroll if
you haven't pa!"
Kim nodded and she went back to eating. Hindi niya tuloy nakita, Lake's grin
widened as he nudged Jamie. Jamie showed him a thumbs-up.
Huh.
"How 'bout you, Salazar? What are your plans?" I jumped in surprise when Kade's
voice addressed me. I glared at him. He knows my plans months before pa. What is he
getting at?
"I'll take a year-off."
"And then?" Lake asked. I looked over at him. He looked surprised at my answer.
Hey, I need a break from studying. I'm gonna get crazy if I see another
international law article.
I shrugged. "Maybe I'll enroll for graduate school. Maybe not." I took a bite on my
pizza and continued to eat.
Lake nodded. "Fair enough." He turned his eyes to his brother. "Ikaw, moron. What
are your plans?" he asked with a grin.
"Law
school," he answered.
Lake's brows furrowed. "Pinayagan ka na ni dad-uncle?" He covered his slip with a

cough. He even sipped his beer to make it look he swallowed his food wrong.
Kade shrugged. "Mom is okay with it. That's the only thing that matters," he
answered, his jaw clenching.
I took a sip on my coke as I stared at him. He turned at me and he just stared.
Lake started talking again. "Speaking of your mom, how is she?"
Kade looked away from me and answered his brother. "She's fine. She's good," he
answered.
Lake was about to ask him another question when Kade glared at him. Lake clucked
her tongue and nodded. Huh. I know that look. J, K and I do that whenever we don't
wanna talk abou-shit.
I startled in my seat when I felt Kade's hand on my bare thigh. I looked at him
with wide-eyes. He just continued eating his pizza with his free hand! Hindi man
lang siya nakatingin sa akin!
Holy tacos.
The little shit's hand lightly massaged my thigh.
I looked around and watched for everyone's reaction. J and K were talking while
Lake was opening a new can of beer. No one know something is happening below the
table!
Oh my gods. This is all wrong and its turning me the fuck on.
I stifled a gasped when I felt him dug his fingers on my thigh.
"Kade..." I said, looking at him.
He looked at me with an innocent expression. "What?"
"What are you doing?" I whispered at him.
He showed me that infuriating half-smile half-smirk
of his. "I'm not doing anything," he said while his hand trailed up near the hem of
my short shorts.
"You'll pay for this," I told him with a saccharine smile pasted on my face.
Kade leaned over. "With pleasure," he said in a low voice.

It was a miracle our friends didn't see that exchange between us.
***
"I can't believe this! He just gave her a ring!" Kade hissed in my ear.
Even I can't believe it. Who in their right mind would give a girl a used
engagement ring for a birthday gift? Ito namang best friend ko, tinanggap!
And damn it, I almost had an aneurysm when I heard her reason. Wala naman daw
malisya.
Oh my gods. She just freaking lost her mind!
But of course, I didn't burst her weird dream bubble. She just got out from a
relationship and she's moving on. An attention from an attractive and successful
guy wouldn't hurt her naman. But still! It's ridiculous!
Lagi na lang whirlwind romance ang gusto ni Jamie?
Can't she let them wait first?
Kind of like what you did to Kade?
Ugh. Shut the fuck up, brain.
I shook my head. "I'll just talk to her again later."
"You better," Kade said in irritation. It made me smile somehow. He's treating
Jamie like his little sisters. Nagiging over-protective na din siya sa amin but
he's trying to fight it.
"Are we gonna meet-up later?" I asked when I saw the entrance of our hotel
building. Nauuna samin si Lake, Kim and Jamie. Mukhang they needed a rest na.
Kami ni
Kade? No pa.
"Yep. Meet me at 12?" he asked.
"Where?"
"At the lobby." He pointed at the entrance for good measure. I nodded.
"Where are we going?" I asked.
Kade shrugged. "We're just gonna take a beach stroll, don't worry."
I glared at him. "Yeah. I'll make you pay pa pala for what you did earlier."
"Huh? What did I do?"
"You pawed at my thigh all-night!" I yelled at him Kade burst into laughter.
Thank God, the music is still loud because the bars around us are still on full
swing. Kung hindi, there's a great chance our friends would hear us!
"Babe, we haven't vlogged for like ages. How are we gonna break the news to Asher?"
I mulled at his question. Oo nga. I almost forgot about our number one shipper. I'm
sure magtatampo yung if hindi siya mababalitaan kaagad about us being officially a
couple.
"We'll make one later? Kahit saglit lang."
"Deal."
He pressed a chaste kiss on my lips just in time before our friends looked at us.
We all said our good nights and headed to our room. I looked back at him for the
last time and I saw him waiting for me.
He winked before he followed Lake to their room.
Shit. I think I just peed on my shorts.
***
"Happy birthday, Salazar."
I jumped in surprise when I heard Kade's voice and felt his arms wrapped around my
middle. I looked up and leaned back on his chest. "Why do you always startle me?" I
asked, frowning.
Kade leaned down and kissed the tip of
my nose. "Sorry."
"Thank you." Nawala sa isip ko na magiging salubong pala ito ng birthday ko. Shit.
I'm 21 years old na! Kaya pala he wanted us to meet at this time. He wanted to be
the first one to greet me in person on the exact date of my birthday.
Small thing for others to, pero for me it's a big deal. Naalala niya and he made a
way talaga to make his greeting special .You're making me swoon, Ongpauco.
I sighed and he just grinned.
"Let's go?"
I nodded and offered him my hand. He took it and we started to walk. Mabuti na lang
at sinuot ko yung maroon crewneck jacket ko. Sobrang lamig ng hangin but at the
same time, ang sarap sa pakiramdam ma-feel yung cool summer night breeze.
We just reached the seashore when he whipped out his phone. He sat down at the dry
sand and patted the spot between his legs. I obliged at his silent command and sat
at the space between his legs. I leaned back and placed the back of my head on his
shoulder.
Medyo reminiscent puwest namin now nung we got stranded in school because of the
supertyphoon.
The spot we sat on was nice. Hindi masyadong loud yung music, in fact the sound of
the waves was louder. Maliwanag din kasi malapit lang kami sa isang floodlight.
"Ready?" Kade asked. Duon ko lang napansin na nakatapat na sa aming dalawa yung
camera ng phone niya and his thumb was hovering the record button.
I tilted my head and smiled at him. "Yep."

I heard the recording sound of the camera. I looked at the camera with a smile on
my face. "Hi, Asher!" I greeted the camera,
"'Sup, Ash?" Kade greeted. I chuckled. Ang weird. How do we announce this? How do
we address this it to a vlog?
Kade cleared his throat. "So... She said yes," he said, his tone proud and...
happy?
Well, I sure hope so.
I looked at him. "It was 'yep' not 'yes' no," I teased. Gods, I will never forget
that moment. Even the littlest details, alam kong hindi ko makakalimutan how we
became an official couple.
"Yes, it was a 'yep' not 'yes." Kade rolled his eyes playfully. "She said the
three-words back. Can you believe it?"
I scoffed. "Really? You thought I will never say those words to you?"
Kade chuckled. "Yeah. I thought you'll get tired of me eventually."
I glared at him. "But I didn't."
"And I love you even more for that," he said before he kissed me. I closed my eyes
immediately and savored his slow, deep kiss. The irritation I felt ebbed away just
because of his kiss and the calming sound of the waves.
My eyes opened up when I remembered we're taking a video. I pulled away from him
and looked back at the camera. I sighed in relief when I saw it was switched off
already.
"I thought we're still recording," I said as I heaved. Grabe. Hirap huminga. I got
oxygen-deprived for minute din siguro.
"I recorded a little. I switched it off when I realized it was still recording," he
explained with a chuckle.
I sighed. "Just edit it before posting sa channel natin ha?" He nodded. Kahit na
private yun, I'm still
not okay sa ganun. Ang tacky kasi kapag may kissing videos or pictures e. I get
irritated whenever I see one on IG or sa newsfeed ko on Facebook.
"What are your plans for tomorrow?" he asked as he started to play with my hair. I
love it when he does that. Most of the time he does that unconsciously and mas
nakakakilig yun.
I snuggled closer to him. I can smell his aftershave and his own manly smell. What
a fucking hot combo.
"Chill lang in the morning and in the afternoon. Dinner ulit and then we'll go at
the foam party."
"Do you have plans for us?" he asked.
I looked at the stars and just noticed na ang dami pala nila. Iba talaga kapag
province. "Do you want to?" I asked him after admiring the night sky.
"Of course." But nakakatamad. Tsaka celebrators dapat ang masu-surprise, not the
other way around.
I looked back at him and smirked. "Why don't you plan it yourself? Surprise me."
Kade chuckled. "Challenge accepted."
***
After we had dinner, we decided to freshen up a bit before we head to the foam
party. Well, I was the only one who really cleaned up.
By 'cleaned up,' I meant shaving and putting lotion everywhere. I brushed my teeth
two-times and flossed. Nag-conditioner pa ako just to make by beach-hair softer. I
wore my red bikini and board shorts. Medyo boyish look but at the same time sexy,
just the way I like it. I forgo the cover-up, too.
I wanted to give Kade a heart-attack.
I was about to leave the bathroom when I saw my phone sitting
on the sink. I took it and felt the twinge of guilt in my chest. When I check my
phone kaninang umaga pagkagising ko, I received texts from my friends, relatives
and of course from my parents. I received missed calls from them too.
I decided not reply or call them back. I even put my phone on airplane mode. I know
its shitty move. Ayoko lang maramdaman for the rest of the day yung hollow feeling
na naramdaman ko nung mabasa ko yung texts nila.
From: Papa
Happy birthday, bubu.
I love you so much.
Kahit ayaw ko, I memorized Papa's text kahit once ko lang nabasa. I cried silent
tears after that. Masakit e. Parang there's someone squeezing the heck out of your
heart. There's a huge lump on your throat that you can't seem to swallow and that
nagging horrible hollow feeling in your chest. It's like there's a lead sitting on
the pits of your stomach.
The feelings I have were ugly.
Can you blame me if I wanted to escape from them? Birthday ko naman. Pagbibigyan ko
na ang sarili ko.
I squeezed my eyes shut and took a deep breath. I let it out slowly as I let go of
my problems... just for tonight.
***
"Happy 21st birthday, L!" they all greeted except Kade. He was just smiling at me.
He never once called me 'L.' He's more comfortable calling me 'Salazar' and
'Louisse'. Good thing he still doesn't know what my first name is.
I know he should've known because he's my boyfriend. But I prefer it that way. And
knowing him, papatayin niya ako sa asar. That I am sure.
The three
of them hugged and greeted me. I don't know what has gotten into them! Kanina pa
nila ako binabati! Siguro kasi now's the proper time for my birthday and dahil sa
excitement. We're all excited to experience the legendary foam party here in
Boracay.
"Happy birthday, Salazar," Kade greeted me when he stepped up in front of me. I

raised my arms and saw him checked me out for the nth time before he engulfed me
with a warm hug. His hug from Lake was so different. It's warmer and his arms were
tight around my waist.
Fuck. This hug is making my knees weak!
"I love you," he whispered before he pulled away from me.
I smiled at him, hoping he sees me saying it back with my eyes.
I looked away from him and studied our surroundings. The foam party is in full-
swing now. The strobe lights were making my eyes hurt, the bubble-machines were
producing bubbles non-stop, the music was too loud and I can feel the ground
shaking to the beat of it, the booze were over-flowing and the people were dancing
like there's no tomorrow.
I noticed some of the couples were making-out and some were gyrating against each
other. It was so freaking wild!
I looked back at my friends, curious with their reactions. But it was Kade that I
saw.
"Where the heck are they?" I asked as I looked around for them.
Kade pointed at my left. "They went there. They thought we followed them," he said
with a shrug.
"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked, annoyed. Ang hirap maghanap ng kasama sa ganito
karaming tao.
Kade
showed me a sexier version of his half-smile half-smirk. Fuck, may ilalala pa pala
yun. He's wearing a white v-neck shirt and a black board shorts. His biceps were in
plain sight and his black board shorts fit his thick and muscular thighs just
right.
He's so damn hot.
He pulled me against him and tilted my head with his index finger. My cheeks burned
when our eyes met. "How can we sneak out if we followed them?"
"Sneak out?" I croaked, my eyes-wide.
"I have plans for you."
Oh shit. Yung pinag-usapan namin nung madaling-araw.
"Plans? What plans?" I asked. Shit. I sounded like a dumb chick.

Kade raised his head and nodded to our opposite direction. I pulled away from him
and looked. "Anong meron?"
"You'll see," he said before taking my hand and grabbing towards the stage. Don't
tell me kakanta na naman siya?!
I was about to stop him when I noticed the screen at the stage.
BREAK LAST YEAR'S RECORD FOR THE LONGEST KISS CONTEST AND GETA ROOM AT BORACAY
MANSIONS HOTEL FOR FREE!
I stopped short. Kade looked at me, waiting for my reaction. "Seriously?!" I asked
him, eyes-wide.
Kade scratched the back of his head. "All of the hotels here are fully-booked
tonight." He shrugged. "I have a backplan but I wanted to try this first."
"Seriously?!" I asked again.
Kade smirked. "Scared, Salazar?"
I'm not. I'm just... scared. Shit. I'm scared nga! Pero that's because I don't
wanna get caught by our friends!
"We might get caught," I hissed at
him.
"They won't. They're at the other side of the party." I looked at the other side
and I can't see them dahil sa dami ng tao and masakit sa mata yung strobe lights.
"What's it gonna be, babe? Are we gonna back out or we're signing up?" he whispered
in my ear. I saw him smirking at me when I looked back.
He's baiting me...
I looked around and couples were already milling around. Wala naman masamang mag-
try, right? I don't think we'll win sa dami ng tao and yung iba mukhang sobrang
competitive. Some of them were talking about strategies na nga e.
"Fine. Let's sign up-" I haven't even finished what I was saying when Kade pulled
me at the registration booth.
I filled out the form the registration form. I wrote our names, our relationship
status and for how long we're been a couple. Ang funny nga kasi nangingibabaw yung
'1 day' na sagot namin sa form.
May free mints pa sa booth at kumuha si Kade ng tatlo. Enough na daw sa amin yun.
Gods. Ang lakas ng trip niya tonight.
"Are we not gonna talk about strategies?" I asked after we settled in our position
near the stage.
Kade shrugged. "We're just gonna enjoy this."
I rolled my eyes. Paano ko maeenjoy to when people are gonna watch us naman? And
our friends!
I planted my hands on my hips and arched and eyebrow. "What if I get lockjaw? What
I get an asthma attack from the oxygen-deprivation, huh?"
Kade draw me close to him. "Don't worry. I got your back, baby."
I was about to talk pa but we put
a mint candy in my mouth. I glared at him and he continued to smirk at me. He put
another one and my mouth watered when I tasted the stinging mint in my tongue.
Kade pressed a chaste kiss on my lips before he put another mint inside my mouth.
"We can do this," he whispered.
We just stared at each other even though the emcee started explaining the rules.
Our eyes didn't left each other until the gun was fired.
And it was on.
***
And we won!
I didn't expect it to happen. But I guess, both of our competitive selves stepped
up. I didn't think we're gonna break the record but we did! It sooo long kasi!
Imagine breaking the record of 1 hour and 13 seconds of kissing?
We finished at 1 hour and 22 minutes. It's a miracle my mouth and jaw still work.
Hindi ko nga maalala kung paano kami umabot ng ganun katagal. They said our last
competition finished at 58 minutes! I just remembered that we had a bumpy start but
when we got the hang of it, we just... moved in sync.
Honestly, I thought I blocked out. It was like the time stopped and it was just us,
in a room where no one can see us. I didn't hear anything but his groans and my
moans, his and my ragged breath.
The memory was hazy. But I can still feel his hands on the back of my neck and the
tensed muscle on his back that I was holding on the whole time. I can still taste
the mints we took. Damn it, I think I already memorized the shape of his lips and
his tongue.
And fuck that tongue, the sensation I felt whenever I remember
how our tongues played... and how we passed and played with the mints with just our
tongues.
Grabe. Kakaibang feeling.
I'm so fucking turned on. I can't see straight!
Kade and I opted not to get our photos taken. The emcee even joked and told us the
famous saying around here. "What happens in Boracay, stays in Boracay, huh?"
We just nodded para wala ng mahabang usapan. The moment we finished talking to the
Boracay Mansions Hotel representative and received the keycard to our hotel room,
Kade and I excused ourselves and left.
We ran away from them laughing at their expressions. They thought we're gonna go at
our hotel room kaagad. But of course, hindi pwede! We went here together with our
friends; we must leave this place with them.
We were at the darker walkway when Kade made me stop. He made me face him and just
like that, I found myself in his arms and kissing him again.
I grabbed his shoulders when Kade bit my lower lip. I closed my eyes as I get lost
in our kiss. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up and I felt every part of my
body tingled. His hand on my nape lowered until it reached my left breast. He
groped it hard and the sensation made me arch my back.
His lips trailed on my cheek until it reached my neck. I groaned when I felt him
suck on my pulse. Shit. It was so damn good. He was so damn good.
His other hand found my butt and he squeezed it. The urge to hump him was so
freaking great that I did it. I jumped on him and I felt him pressed his hardness
against me. Our mouths fused again and his hand from my breast found my hair,
pulling them in the most sensual way.
My hands found his hair and I pulled them too as I bit sucked on his lower lip.
Kade growled-
"KADE! LOUISSE!"
Kade and I jumped away from each other. Eyes wide open, I looked around our
surroundings and found no one. What the hell? Who the fuck was that cock-blocker?
When our eyes met, Kade and I burst into laughter.
"Butthurt competition?" he asked with a boyish grin.
Baka nga. Maybe our one of our competitions in the kissing contest was too butthurt
kaya they cock-blocked us in our make-out session. I grinned back. "Shall we find
our friends?"
"Wait," he said before her pulled me close to him.
My breath hitched. Is he gonna kiss me again?
He did. But unlike our make-out session, the kiss he gave me was teasing. It was
chaste and it turned me on more.
"1AM. Our room," he said between the chaste kisses. I shivered when I felt him slid
the keycard on my board shorts' back pocket.
"Protections?" I asked.
He pulled away from me. I opened my eyes and found him looking down at me with a
serious and intense look. "You sure?" he asked.
"I trust you," was the only answer I know he will take.
Kade leaned down again and pressed a kiss on my forehead. "You're mine until
morning, then."
=================
Chapter 30: Explode
Chapter 30
Explode
Four Months Ago...
I was walking towards the farthest room, Room 515, in the 5th floor hallway when I
stopped short seeing Kade in front of the door. He was leaning his back against the
wall, arms wrapped in his chest and his head bowed. I walked towards him and
watched him whip his head to my direction.
"How long have you been waiting?" I asked when I was just about two meters away
from him.
"A while," he said with a shrug.
I stopped in front of him and felt my face and my whole body heat up. Knowing what
will happen later made me feel excited and nervous at the same time. I watched his
lips as it slowly formed into a smirk. He lowered his arms and took a step close to
me.
"I'm gonna buy condoms. What flavor do you prefer?" he asked as his hand gently
grab my wrist. I looked down and watched his hand take the keycard in my hand.
"F-Flavor?" I stuttered looking up at him. Shit. Kapag ganito siya kalapit, I

always turn into a messy pile of mush. Seeing his hooded eyes and his mestizo
features just weakens me. Smelling the heavy mixture of his aftershave and his own
unique smell always makes me feel lightheaded.
Kade nodded. "Yeah."
I gulped. Shit. I'm sooo not prepared for that question. "What are the flavors ba?"
Kade's smirk widened. "Strawberry, banana, apple, orange, mint, chocolate..." he

shrugged as he trailed off.
I bit my lower lip. "Strawberry and chocolate, I guess."
"Okay, babe."
He
leaned forward and I met his lips halfway. It was just a teasing kiss. He pulled
right away and opened the door to our room. I followed him after my head cleared
off the hazy fog.
Oh, wow.
I got stunned when I saw the whole room. There's a heart-shaped red rose petals on
the bed. And the bed, my Gods, it was huge.
The view on our balcony was breath-taking. You can see the lights of Boracay's
nightlife.
I looked back at Kade and saw him watching me intensely. I glanced away from him
and a thought struck my head when I saw the bathroom. "Should I take a shower na?
Or should I wait for you?" I asked as I walked towards the bed.
"We should shower separately. I wouldn't last long if I join you in the shower."
I gasped when I felt him on my back. His warm breath fanned the back of my neck.
"I'm gonna go now. Do you need anything?"
I shook my head in answer, my throat was too dry to form a sound.
"Okay, then." I felt his lips touched the skin below my right ear. Goosebumps
covered my arms and I felt my whole body clenched with just one kiss from him.
"I'll lock the door on my way out."
***
I looked at my own reflection and I scrutinized every part of my body that is

visible. Gods, why am I standing here naked and staring at my body?
I don't need to think negative thoughts right now. I don't need to remember any of
my insecurities. I need to be confident because confidence is fucking sexy.
And I want Kade to see me sexy even though I'm dying of nervousness inside.
sighed. Makaligo na nga.
I gathered my hair with a hair-tie and covered it with a shower cap. I pulled the
shower door open and went inside. Switching the shower on, I just stood there and
let the hot water wash off the grime from the foam party.
Questions flooded my head almost immediately.
Will I enjoy it? Will Kade enjoy it?
Should I ask questions? Should I ask for his preferences?
Lights on or lights off?
Should I act like a tease? Shit. I don't even know if I'm effective at seducing.
Should I moan or scream his name louder?
Should I talk dirty or just say 'yes' all the time?
Should I offer him handjob? A blowjob? But I don't know how to do that... We
haven't gotten into third base yet.
What if I don't come? What if he doesn't come?
Will I bleed later? Shit. If I do, what should I do next?
What if I change my mind in the middle of the deed? Should I ask him to stop?
What if after all this shit, I'm a bad lay pala?
Gods, why am I over thinking this? It's Kade. I have no doubt he'll take good care
of me. With he's huge ego, he wouldn't let me not to have an orgasm and knowing
him, he'll stop if I ask him to or if he notices that I'm uncomfortable. He's
attentive and he pays attention. I trust him with my body and I know he will not
disappoint.
But am I really ready?
I think I am naman. I love him and I think it's the right time to do it. That's the
most important thing naman diba?
I'm not doing this just to get rid of my virginity. I'm doing this because I feel
like... it's time. I know I'm doing this for the right reason, not just for the
heck of it.
***
I stopped short when I stepped out of the bathroom. He was sitting at the edge of
the bed, watching me with an unreadable expression on his face. I cleared my throat
and swallowed the huge lump in it.
Squaring my shoulders, I walked slowly until I reached his front. "I didn't hear
you. You're here na pala," I said, looking down at him.
Kade leaned back on his hands and looked up at me. "Are you wearing anything under
that robe?" he asked with a low voice.
My hands involuntarily gripped the gaping lapels on my chest. Shit. Nawala sa isip
ko.
"It's just me," I answered honestly.
Gods, I'm acting like a meek girl. Where's the tough Louisse Salazar? How come
Cascade Ongpauco reduced her into this stupid, shy girl?
"Are you nervous?"
My hands tightened its gripped on my robe. I decided not to answer that. After all,
silence means yes naman diba?
My breath hitched when he suddenly stood up and he's looking down at me now. "It's
normal to get nervous, babe. After all, this is your first time. Don't worry. I'll
take care of you. I'll be gentle."
I bit my lower lip and nodded. I didn't expect anything less from him.
My breath hitched once again when he touched my chin and raised my head, our eyes
never losing contact. "But I need you to be honest all the time, alright?"
"Okay."
"I
need you to know that you can always back out... anytime you want to stop, I'll
stop. Just say it, okay?" he asked as his hands glided on each side of my neck.
"Everything will happen in your own terms. I won't mind if you change your mind."
"I understand."
"Are you really sure, babe?" he asked as he pressed his forehead against mine. "Are
you really gonna give it to me?"
"Ayaw mo ba?" I teased.
He kissed my forehead and the overwhelming emotions made me close my eyes. "I want
it as long as you want it."
The onslaught of emotions caught me off-guard. The tingles on the ends of my toes,
fingers... The butterflies in my stomach were fluttering like crazy... The wild
thumping of my chest, it's like my heart was gonna jump out of my chest any moment
now. The lust pooling in my lower abdomen and my knees were weakening as each
seconds pass.
The stinging sensation at the back of my eyes, too, overwhelmed me.
"I love you, Cascade," I whispered as the tears rolled down my cheeks.
Fuck, why am I crying?
Kade wiped the tears off my face with his thumbs. "I love you, too, Louisse."
I opened my eyes and saw again the unreadable expression on his face. I pulled away
from him and laughed at my silliness. "Sorry, ang drama."
He just smiled and chucked me on the chin. Minsan talaga, para kaming best friends
lang. But that's what makes our relationship greater; we're best friends even
though we're both in love with each other.
"I'll just take a shower and..." he stopped.
Noticing
his slip, I arched an eyebrow and waited for him to continue. He sighed and
scratched the back of his neck. "Jack-off."
My eyebrows rose up to my hairline. "Jack-off?" I asked in confusion.
E diba that's one of the reasons for having sex? To get off? Why does he need to
jack-off before we have sex? Does he think he won't get off tonight?
Kade's cheeks burned. "It's a necessary precaution." He chuckled awkwardly. "I know
I'll explode the moment I disrobe you."
"Oh," I said, wide-eyed.
Kade touched my chin and made me close my mouth. "Yes, 'oh'," he teased before
pressing his lips against mine.
***
I watched him as he stepped out of the bathroom. He was rubbing his hair dry with a
towel as he walked close to the bed. I gulped when my eyes trailed down to his
naked torso up to the towel wrapped around his narrow hips. I think I almost
passed-out seeing his lean body.
Gods, he's really made up of good stuff.
Hindi mapayat pero hindi rin gaanong ripped. His football training really paid off
on and off the field.
And don't let me even start with that huge hard-on.
"Like what you see?"
I snapped my eyes back at his and saw him smirking at me, standing beside the bed.
He raised his hand and did the come-hither gesture after throwing the wet towel to
the bed side table.
Damn, that was hot.
I kneeled on the bed and faced him. He took a step close and I watched his hands
reached for mine. He placed them on the towel wrapped around his waist.
And just
like that, the confidence I lost earlier came back...
"Lights on or lights off?" he asked with a low, gravelly voice.
I looked straight into his eyes and smiled. "Dimmed lights."
He reached over the bedside table and tested the switches until he adjusted the all
the lights to my liking.
"Do you want me to talk dirty or to stay quiet?"
I bit my lower lip before answering. "I want you say whatever you want to say."
He raised a hand and untied my hair from its messy bun. I closed my eyes and
groaned as I enjoyed the impromptu massage he did on my scalp. "Remember the things
I said earlier, Louisse. Your body, your rules, okay?"
I opened my eyes and nodded. "I promise to say 'stop' when I feel uncomfortable."
"That's my girl," he said before kissing my forehead.
I closed my eyes again and breathed deeply. "I'm ready for you, Cascade," I said as
I opened my eyes.
He kissed the tip of my nose as I felt his hands untied the belt of my robe. Our
eyes stayed in contact as he pushed my robe off my shoulders and as I tugged at his
towel. They both fell at the same time.
"I love you," he said before he closed the gap between us.
***
I thought my face was gonna split in half the moment I woke up. I felt sore yet at
the same time, I felt like I was floating. Ganito siguro talaga if you did it for
the right reasons with the right person at the right time. Maluwag sa loob. No
regrets.
We did it.
And it was good.
I bled a little but he
took care of me after. I remembered watching him cleaning me down there with a wet
and warm hand towel. He was true to his words. He was a gentle and attentive. He
would always look at my face, waiting for any signs of discomfort. I would just
smile at him or bring his face down to me then kiss him again.
I consider myself luck, really. It was that painful. But there was an undeniable
sting. Maybe its because of him. He really put all his concentration on making my
body ready. I thought the foreplay we did was hours long.
Gods, I can't... Gah.
And the feelings?
Gods, I think they intensified.
Waking up to the sleeping face of Kade was the best thing that has happened to me
in a long time. The feeling was indescribable. Happy and contented maybe? But they
wouldn't suffice.
I sighed when I felt his arms around me tightened. Being this close to him while
we're both warm and naked was so relaxing.
He buried his head on my neck and his warm breath fanned against it. I felt his
morning wood twitched against my stomach and it made me giggle.
"Good morning to you, too," I said, my voice hoarse. Gods, was I that loud?
Kade's chest rumbled against mine as he chuckled.
"How are you?" he asked when he raised his head. His eyes roamed around my face
searching for something. Whatever it was, it left a satisfied smile in his face
when he saw it.
"I'm a little sore, but I'm good," I said with a smile. I did an inventory in my
head. My lady bits and my four limbs
were sore, my throat was dry and I just know I have the worst bed head.
Lucky for him, the sex hair worked for him too well. Ang sexy niya tignan with that
sexy hair paired up with a lazy grin of his.
"Too sore for round three?" he asked before leaning down and making me remember
what happened between us last night with a deep kiss.
I moaned against his lips, ignoring our morning breath. When you're over come with
lust, nothing else matters-
Kade pulled away. "What?" I asked, annoyed.
He smirked. "I'm just gonna take a piss," he said before jumping out the bed. I
admired his body as he stretched his arms before stepping inside the bathroom.
I sat up and stretched too. Damn, I think I'm gonna ask him to massage my back
later.
I looked around the room as I waited for Kade to come back, my phone caught my
attention and I took it.
It's just 6:18 in the morning. Ang aga pala naming nagising. We have more time pa
before we get back to our friends. I snuggled against the comforter as I typed my
passcode on my phone.
I checked my social media accounts and got bored immediately. Nothing much
happened. Boring old stuff halos lahat ng nasa news feed ko. Puro vacation photos
and all that shit.
I was gonna put my phone back at the bedside table when my phone started blaring.
Apparently, I just received 10 new text messages.
Shit. I accidentally turned off the airplane mode.
I sighed and opted to read the text messages.
It was a bad move.
The shit-eating
grin and the after-sex glow I was sporting earlier vanished almost immediately and
were replaced by dread and a hollow feeling.
It felt like everything just exploded in my face. What I read stunned me--no, it
crushed me into pieces.
"Baby, what's wrong?"
My head snapped up when I heard Kade's concerned voice. I was just staring at him
with unseeing eyes as tears started to well up in them. I felt him sat down beside
me and took my phone away from me.
The messages from my mother were burned in my head and I don't think anything can
erase it and no thought-blocking would work against it.
Kade's arms wrapped around me as I burst into tears.
From: Mama
Yesterday 6: 11 AM
Happy birthday, bubu!
I love you, anak. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me and your papa.
You will always be our baby girl.

Mahal na mahal ka namin ng papa mo.
Yesterday 4:53 PM
Bubu, please call. Emergency.
Naospital ang papa mo. Nagcollapse siya kanina.
Yesterday 5:00 PM
Hindi ka namin macontact.
Emergency ito anak.
Yesterday 5: 15 PM
I know its your birthday but please find time to call us!
I need to talk to you!
Yesterday 5:45 PM
Bakit hindi ka matawagan?
Did you change your number?
Yesterday 7:29 PM
Bubu, anak... Please call us!
Hindi ka ba nagaalala sa papa mo?
Tinitest siya ngayon. Wala pang results pero hindi maganda ang tingin ng doctors.
Hindi pa siya nagigising!
Yesterday 8:54 PM
Ganyan ba kalaki ang galit mo sa amin?
Hindi mo magawang magalala?
Your father is dying, Louisse!

=================
Chapter 31: Last Ditch Effort
Chapter 31
Last Ditch Effort
Four Months Ago...
After reading my mother's text messages, I found myself living through the motions.
I moved and lived like a zombie for the last 2 days since my world went upside
down. I tried to act normal when I'm with my friends. I laughed and reacted
accordingly in appropriate times. But my heart was never into it.
And through it all, Kade became my anchor. I depended on him and he took my back.
We never talk about what happened between us two days ago. We continued with our
lives like nothing happened. But there was a slight change in him, he was extra
careful with me and he became more attentive.
It was like he's just waiting for me to snap.
Pero tapos na ako sa stage na yun. I just... shut down. Honestly, it feels like I'm
dead inside.
What time are you gonna visit your dad?
I stared at his text message for a minute. Lake and Kade just left our apartment
earlier. We had an emergency meeting kasi. River was coming back and Jamie freaked
out. He drunk-dialed her and he told her he regrets letting her go. Kade even
warned her he's not gonna back down that easy no matter how many times she reject
him.
During the emergency meeting, I got weird glances from Kade and Kim. Kade knew what
I am going through so I'm not worried. But si Kim... maybe she noticed some things.
After all, she's one of my best friends.
Thank gods she didn't say something.
Hindi naman ako nagtatampo na hindi napapansin ni Jamie na may mali sa akin. I know
she's distracted with the whole River-situation. I just don't want to trouble them
both. They also have their own issues to think about. Ayoko na dumagdag.
This is my problem and if I have to face it alone, I'll do it.
I'm about to leave the apartment. I replied to Kade.
I placed me phone on my bed side table before I stepped in front of my vanity

mirror. I already got dressed and my face made-up. I needed my cosmetics to cover-
up my pale face and the dark circles under my eye, I need it as a shield.
I promised myself not to let my guard down again and I'm setting my walls higher
and harder to break now. Because it hurts like a goddamned bitch when life pulls
the rug from under your feet.
My phone vibrated loudly. I took it from the bed side table and read Kade's new
text message.
I'll be there in 10.
I sighed. Kaya ko namang pumunta sa ospital on my own. I don't need him to see me
seeing my father for the first time in weeks.
I can go there on my own. I typed my reply and sent it immediately.
His reply came seconds later.
I know you can. But you don't have to go and get through it alone.
I bit my tongue to fight off the surge of feelings that was threatening to fill my
chest. I closed my eyes and imagined my own feet stomping my feelings to death. I
don't need
anyone.
I'm already here. Meet me in my car.
I sighed and left my room.
***
Kade and I didn't exchange a kiss or even touch when I got into his car. He only
acknowledged me with a look. I know he's giving me space yet at the same time, he
won't let me out of his sight. I actually don't mind. I find comfort knowing he's
respecting the unspoken boundary I'm asking.
I unsnapped my seat belt. "You can just wait for me here," I said as he parked his
pick-truck at the hospital's open-area parking lot.
Kade unsnapped his seat belt, opened his door and jumped out of his car. I watched
him as he rounded his car until he reached my side. He opened the door for me and I
ignored his hand as I climbed down on my own.
I heard him sigh as he lock the doors of his truck with the key fob in his hand.
With a respectable feet apart, we walked towards the hospital with an unhurried
pace. I watched him through my peripheral vision. Both of his hands were swinging
in his sides and his clean-shaven face was void of any emotion.
I fight off the urge to sigh and just continued walking with my eyes now focusing
in front of me.
We walked side-by-side and quietly regarded the hospital. Generic white walls,
squeaky-clean floors, ominously-lit hallways and that horrible hospital sterile
smell that seemed to take-up residence in your nasal cavities.
"Do you know what room he's at?" I startled at his question.
I shook my head.
I still haven't contacted my parents. Kahit para alamin kung anong room number
where my father was in, I didn't ask. Nalaman ko lang sa Facebook page ni mama na
nandito sila sa St. Liza's Medical Hospital.
"Wait here, I'll ask at the Nurse's station." He pointed somewhere but I didn't
look, I just nodded. "What's your dad's full name?"
"Joel Salazar," I answered, my tone sounded monotonous. He stared at me for a

second before he left me standing in the middle of the hallway.
He was back minutes later. "Room 430," he said before taking my hand.
I stared at our hands as we walk. The last time we had a physical contact was at
the airplane going back here in Manila. I slept at his shoulder and he just held my
hand the whole time.
Nakakamiss. But the comfort I felt was a bit suffocating.
I tried pulling my hand away but his only tightened. I looked at him and see him
clench his jaw. "Kade..."
He didn't look at me. "Don't. Please."
I nodded at his request. I'll take this suffocating feeling over making him upset
now. He's here to help me and I don't want to act like a douche to him when he
asked me not to.
When we got to the fourth level of the hospital building, I started to feel
nauseous. My heart pounded against my rib cage, my knees weakened with every step I
take, I felt bullets of cold sweat form on my forehead and my hands were clammy.
I stifled a gasp when we stopped walking. I raised my head and read the numbers on
the door.
430
We're
here.
I stood there frozen for awhile. The door was ajar and I watched as Kade rapped
against it lightly. We waited but no one answered. He looked at me briefly; his
face was etch with concern. I looked away from him and slowly opened the door.
What I saw made my breath hitch.
My dad was lying in the hospital bed, sleeping peacefully. Tubes were connected in
his nostrils and in his mouth. There was also an IV on his right hand.
Never in my wildest dreams or nightmares did I see my physically fit and strong
father bed-ridden. He never showed any weaknesses. He never cries. He was always
laughing and making lousy dad-jokes. I've never imagined him look small and weak
lying in a hospital bed.
But what broke my heart even more was seeing my mother sitting beside him, holding
his left hand. Her eyes were closed and her lips were moving. In her free hand,
there was a rosary. It was the rosary papa gave her when I lost the one I borrowed
from her.
It was a simple pearl rosary.
Looking at my mother, I can't help but start to cry. This is the worst thing that
can happen to anyone, watching and waiting for the day your love one leave you. You
never know if God would listen to every prayer you utter, you never know if he will
grant you with the answers you asked for.
Bile instantly rose to my throat and I ran away from Kade. I entered the first
comfort room I saw and puked my guts out. Tears and snot were in my face as I
continued to dry-heave. I cried harder when I felt Kade's hands gather my hair and
held
it away from me.
I took the handkerchief he offered and wiped my eyes, nose and mouth.
Wala ng hiya-hiya. My boyfriend just saw me at my lowest and I just don't fucking
care anymore.
I moved away from him and went to the sink. I can feel his eyes at me as I rinse my
mouth with water. Washing my hands, I decided to tell him my final request.
"Take me away from here."
***
Kade brought me back to the apartment. I let him inside knowing na walang tao at
kami lang ang magiging tao duon. We were both tensed and out of fucks to give at
the same time. Fed up na pareho sa drama. But we know they're just getting started.
In the back of my mind, I was thinking that this isn't what he had sign up for. I
know it in my heart that there will come a time one of these days that I should let
him go.
He dragged me into my room and I willingly followed him. We went straight to my
bathroom. I brushed my teeth as I watched him take his clothes off.
He undressed me slowly after I'm done brushing my teeth. I just let him do it. He
pulled my shower curtain to the side and gently pushed me inside. We were both just
standing under the cold shower after he switched it on.
I was the one who touched him first. I wrapped my arms around his middle and rest
my head in his chest. I closed my eyes but all I can see was the image of my mother
praying the rosary beside my father.
The image is burned in my head.
"Make me forget, Cascade."
"I can't."
My
eyes snapped open at his answer. I looked up at him with squinted eyes. "What?"
I noted his eyes were sad... and disappointed "Not like this, Salazar."
"You don't want to?" Bakit niya pa ako dinala dito sa banyo to shower with him?
"I didn't bring you her to have sex, okay?" He raked his wet hair before turning
off the shower.
I just gave him a blank look.
Kade sighed, "I thought maybe a shower would clear your head and wash you off that
awful sterile smell."
That made my chest swell and my lips twitch. Normalcy. Kahit papano meron pa rin
but I know it will disappear soon.
I've decided. I can't do this to him. I push people away and shut down when I'm
hurting. Hindi niya kailangang mag sayang ng oras sa katulad kong pessimist at
damaged goods.
It will hurt-it actually fucking hurts me right now just looking at his
unsuspecting face-but it will be for the best. Para sa aming dalawa.
I'm gonna let him go later but I will... give him a parting gift.
I stand on my tip toes and kissed his lips. He kissed me back and we engaged in a
slow, deep kiss. I stopped his hands when I felt them touch my face. I pulled away
from him and saw his confused expression.
I slowly dropped to my knees and pulled his length in my mouth.
***
"What the fuck did you just say?" Kade growled as he sit up on my bed.
I covered my naked chest with my comforter and followed suit. "I said I'm breaking
up with you, Kade," I said with a sigh. We just finished having sex when
the words just slipped out of my stupid big mouth.
"So what the fuck is this? A last ditch effort?" Kade rarely raises his voice.
Straigh-forward siya and he always mean what he says. His menacingly quiet voice
would always make a lesser man cower when it comes to debates. He never yells
because for him it's a sign of desperation and indication of a nearing defeat.
And hearing him raise his voice at me... it fucking hurts.
I shook my head and concentrated on not crying. "You didn't sign up for this, Kade.
You will hate me in the future because what you saw earlier? That's nothing." Tears
started to well up in my eyes and I tried my hardest to blink them away.
"I'm the daughter that ignores her parents for months. I'm that girl that pushes
people away when she's hurt. I am the asshole that runs away without the slightest
ounce of guilt." I wiped the tears running down my face. "For fuck's sakes, just
save yourself now."
"I understand you're in a messed-up situation. But I'm not a gonna leave you now."
He shook his head. "I'm not weak, Louisse. I can take whatever you throw at me." He
stared at me dead on. "If you push me away, I'll pull you back. If you ignore me,
I'll make you fucking notice me. If you run away, I'll run away with you." His jaw
clenched as he took a breath. "I will not let you go, Louisse."
Hindi na ako nagsalita. What can I say after that?
Minutes later, I received a call from Kim. Pauwi na raw siya and she's asking what
food to bring home. Sobrang random lang. I said anything works fine. I bade her
goodbye and binaba ko agad yung tawag after niyang mag-comment about my weird tone.
"You need to leave. Kim's coming home na." That never stopped us before to stay in
my room together. But now... I just needed a break from him.
He was quiet as he got dressed. I just watched him from my bed and waited for him
to leave. Saka na ako magbibihis kapag nakaalis na siya.
He went back to me and kissed my forehead. "I love you, you asshole," he said
before leaving me alone.
Break na talaga tayo, Cascade. I texted him.
Minutes later, I received a text message from him.
In your dreams, Salazar.
=================
Chapter 32: North Star

Chapter 32
North Star
Four Months Ago...
From: Cascadde Ongpauco
Get dressed. I'll pick you up in 30.
I blinked after reading Kade's new text message. Did we set up a date today? May
nakalimutan ba ako?
We're going out today?
We'll visit your dad
My stomach dropped after reading his reply. Visit papa? Now? Last time, I told him
I'll visit my father when I know I'm ready to face them. Hindi ngayong biglaan. I
know he's frustrated at me because it's been a week since we went there. I really
want to visit my father but there's a part in me that can't stomach seeing him that
weak.
Before I learned about the secret they're hiding from me, my father was my hero.
He's strong, proud and intimidating. I love and hate how protective he is of me.
Akala ko kasi only child niya ako e.
But even though I have been ignoring them, it's still so hard seeing him lying in a
hospital bed. I didn't wish for him to be sick. I just wanted to get-away for a
while.
And it has been a week... Sabi ni mama, he's responding to the treatment. I texted
my mother the day after Kade and I went there. But she didn't fully disclose what's
going on with papa because she wants to talk to me in person. Naintindihan ko
naman. I know galit siya sa akin because I'm too coward to face them.
I'm glad though na binabalitaan niya ako kahit papano. But my chest gets heavier
whenever my mother texts me that he's awake and is waiting for me.
We? How come we have plans I didn't know about? I replied after a few minutes.
Get a move on.
Sheesh. He's so fucking bossy. He's not even my boyfriend anymore and he's ordering
me around.
I didn't reply. I know he wouldn't take no for an answer and quite frankly, I think
it's high time to see my father. I just don't know what to expect... Baka paalisin
din nila ako because they're too furious at me.
I've been in here in Manila for more than a week and hindi ko man lang nagawang
magpakita. I just texted them. I was too fucking coward to call.Bumisita ako, yes.
But they don't know that.
I guess I'm just gonna wear my big girl panties and suck it up.
***
"How are you?" Kade asked as he holds my hand. I don't know how he did it while
he's driving.
How can I tell him my heart is pounding so hard and I'm sweating like a pig right
now?"Fine," I answered with a shrug.
"Yeah, right," he said, his tone dripping with sarcasm.
I just sighed. There's no use in arguing with him. He's a freaking debater. Hindi
ko siya matatalo and I'm done defending myself. Nakakapagod din, really.
"What will you tell your mom when we get there?"
"I'll tell her I'm... busy."
"Fuck off, Salazar," he sneered as he lets go of my hand. My eyes widened at his

outburst. "If that's the excuse you're gonna tell her, might
as well don't come."
What he said hit a nerve. I might as well didn't come. But he's the one who forced
me into this.
Fine. Ako na mali. I won't answer if she asks. I didn't tell him that though. I'm
done talking to him. The fight just left me. It's too fucking tiring.
"Shit. I'm sorry, babe." He sighed as he takes my hand again. I let him hold it. I
don't wanna fight him. He's been a great help since this face blew up in my face
more than a week ago. Kahit nakipaghiwalay na ako sa kanya, he's still there for
me. And even though I don't want to depend on him, I just can't help it.
I hate depending on people. I'm an only child and I grew-up as an independent
individual. I'm a pessimist. I also hate troubling people lalo na kapag alam kong I
can handle my problems on my own. And even though I was still in the dark about my
father's second family before, I still have trust issues. I don't know where they
came from, honestly.
I don't even remember the five years my parents got separated. Maybe in the back of
my mind, may natatandaan o alam ko and I'm just suppressing it. After all, duon
naman ako magaling.
Thought-blocking. Denial and Repression.
Fuck. I shouldn't have read Jamie's books. Bakit kasi pakalat-kalat sa living room
yung psych books niya.
I closed my eyes and leaned back on my seat. "Apology accepted." I squeezed his
hand in mine and ignored the urge to sigh again. In a normal day, I would've bitten
his head off already but I'm just... done talking.
***
Kade was
literally dragging me with his arms were wrapped around me. Ayaw niya talaga akong
tumakas this time. Maybe he doesn't want to see another dramatic running scene or a
puking episode from me. I don't want him to see me that way again and I don't think
it'll happen again now.
I've seen papa. I'm prepared now... or so I thought.
When we got in front of Room 430, Kade immediately knocked on the door loudly. I
didn't have any time to react so when the door opened, I was practically pressed
against Kade. To say my mother was socked seeing two of us is an understatement.
She didn't have any clue that I had a boyfriend. I feel terrible not telling her.
Close kami ni mama but because of our issues, nagkaroon ng huge gap between us. I
tell her almost everything. My dreams, future plans, frustrations, boy problems...
Sometimes, we even daydream together.
She would tell me stories about her life when she was at my age. I love it when she
does that. I'd envy how she lived her younger days, her career as a model and a
young beauty queen, her adventures with her friends and her past relationships. And
of course, how she and papa met.
Of all her stories, their love story was my favorite. It was almost perfect e.
Little did I know, the story she told me was incomplete. There was a huge plot
twist five years after they had me.
I snapped out of my reverie when Kade speaks. "Good afternoon, Mrs Salazar." He
released me from his hold, he knows I'm not gonna leave now that my mother saw me.
My mother visibly collected herself and
smiled forcefully.
"Hi, 'Ma," I greeted her lamely. She didn't reply but she motioned for us to get
in.
I felt my heart tripled its heartbeat. Kade's hand found my lower back and he
gently guided me inside. Wala na talagang atrasan to. Fuck.
I hands formed into fists when my eyes contacted to my father's sleeping form. I've
seen this before but I guess nothing can prepare you from the overwhelming pain
when you look at your sick father.
Kade's hand fell from my back. I took it and hold it tightly. He squeezed my hand.
I let out the breath that I didn't know I was holding. My mother let us sit at the
sofa in front of the television set. We sat there awkwardly and faced her as she
sits at the loveseat.
"I'm Cascade Ongpauco," he said to my mother. Ako dapat nag-iintroduce sa kanya

ngayon. But I just can't open my mouth. I think he knows I'm too choked up to talk.
"And you're her...?" My mother prompted, her brows arched while looking at our
holding hands.
"Friend," I blurted without thinking.
Kade squeezed my hand tight. I almost yelped in pain.
I heard him clear his throat. "How is Mr Salazar po?" Kade asked my mother,
changing the subject.
"He's responding to the medication," my mother started. "Hindi okay yung results ng
tests na ginawa sa kanya pagdating namin dito. But a lot can happen in a week."
I winced. Ain't that the truth, mama.
"He's always tired and irritated. But I know it's all because of his illness." I
looked down
on my lap as I listen to her talk. "He's fighting it. Malakas si Joel and I know
he's going to beat it."
Beat what? What is his illness?
As if Kade read my mind, he asked the most important question for me. "If you don't
mind me asking, Ma'am... What's his condition po?"
My mother didn't answer. Maybe she do mind. I looked up at her face and it broke my
heart seeing her fight her tears from falling. I watch her swallow loudly as she
wiped a stray tear from her tired face.
She sniffed before she answered. "Stage 3. Prostate cancer."
Stage 3. Prostate cancer.
It was like someone punched me in the gut. My mother's words knocked the wind out
of me. What she said made this whole ordeal... real. It has a name. It has a stage.
This wasn't just a bad dream or a nightmare. It's our fucking reality.
I jumped from my seat when the door burst open and young guy entered inside the
room. "Tita Letty! Kamusta na po si Papa?" the young guy said. I watched him with
wide eyes as he put the plastic bag from a fast food chain he was holding on the
table near my father's bed.
Wait...
Papa?
"I see... Tulog na naman si-Ate?" He stopped short when he saw us sitting at the
sofa.
Oh my gods.
I cannot believe this.
I just stared at him with wide eyes as I felt my heart breaking into a million
pieces.
"We need to go po," Kade said suddenly before pulling me to stand up.
"It was nice meeting you, Mrs Salazar."
One minute we were inside my father's hospital room and now we're outside, half-
walking and half-running as we escape them.
We stopped short when we reach the parking lot area. Kade made me face him and I
just found myself sitting on my haunches. Fuck, pagod na pagod na ako.
Kade did the same thing and his hands held my face. "You wanna get out of here,
Salazar?" he asked gently.
Tears rolled down from my eyes as I nod my head. "Rooftop?" he asked again.
Just imagining the peaceful view of the sunset and Manila bay somehow relaxed me a
little. "Please," I answered.
***
"What's the title of this song?" I asked as I stared at his face.
Kade put his arm under my neck and pulled me close to his body. We're in the back
of his pick-up truck, lying as we watched the Manila night sky.
"Tadhana," he answered.
I just nodded and stared back at the stars. It was like a miracle seeing them
despite the polluted air of Manila.
I pointed at the three stars that were close to each other. "Orion's belt," I said.
Kade raised his hand and pointed at the sky. He did calculated movements with his
hand. "Big dipper," he finally said.
"See that faint star near the Big Dipper? Well, really it's a part of Little
Dipper."
Syempre hindi. I don't know where exactly he's pointing at.

"No," I answered. That got a chuckle from him.
"Too bad, you won't see the North Star," he said with a sigh.
North
Star? I thought it was the brightest star in the sky? "You said' faint star?'
Shouldn't it be the brightest?" I asked, confused.
They even said it can be used as a guide if you lose your compass or your map. May
mga nabasa pa nga ako na lost travelers uses it because it's always at the northern
hemisphere. I'm not sure if I understand it correctly.
"It's a common misconception, Salazar." He lowered his hand. "It's the brightest in
the Ursa Minor but Sirius is the brightest star in the sky."
I giggled. "Kuya Kim, is that you?" Hmm... Sirius Black, naalala ko tuloy si Jamie
and her Harry Potter fetish.
Kade just laughed.
"How come you know so much about stars and constellations?" I asked. I noticed the
smile in his face slowly disappears.
"My mom used to stargaze with me when I was a little kid." Oh. His mom. The same
mom he rarely talks about. "I got fascinated with it. Honestly, my first dream is
to become an astronaut."
That kind of shocked me. Kade? As an astronaut?
"But I fell in love with law after I binge-watched Law and Order when I was in high
school."
His confession made me smile. He fell in love with law but he still can't forget
the stars. "So... Kuya Kim, is it true that the North Star never changes? Is it
really dependable and constant?" I asked, looking at him with a huge, silly grin.
He looked away from the night sky and stared back at me. "Yup. It can be used to
find the direction of north and to determine latitude."
I looked back in the sky and tried to find the North Star. "It has another name,
right?" Wala talaga. I can't see it.
"Polaris."
I nodded before snuggling closer to his chest. I pressed my nose against his shirt
and sniffed at his faint perfume and unique manly scent.
A thought struck me and made me stiffened.
Dependable and constant. Just like Cascade Ongpauco.
I relaxed as I opened my eyes.
Our eyes met. I smiled at him and gently touched his neck with my right hand.
"Thank you for saving me earlier, Kade," I whispered to him.
Kade leaned forward and kissed me on my forehead. "No worries, babe."

"Thanks for being my North Star," my cheeks heat up as I said the words. It's too
cheesy but it held so much weight for me.
He's been there for me since the beginning. He had never let down. He takes care
of me. He had never left my side no matter how much I push him away. He loves me.
I always find myself lost these couple of days. But he would always lead me to the
right path.
It's hard for me to directly acknowledge that I need him... that I need to depend
on him. I hope he understands the meaning of my words.
He's my constant.
He's my Polaris.
He's my North Star.
=================
Chapter 33: Four Days
Chapter 33
Four Days
Four Months Ago...
F1 Driver River Ongpauco, still unconscious but stable
I clicked the exit button on my browser and sighed. I already know what's in that
article.
He's in coma, medically-induced.
Broken bones on his left wrist and arm.
Deep wounds on both of his legs.
It's been three days since River got into an accident while racing in Monaco. It's
also been three days since Kade and I talked. I was there in his condo when we both
learned about River's car accident in the race.
We exchanged text messages naman here and there but it was like nothing like
before. He's distracted and worked up with what happened to his brother. I
understand what he's going through right now kaya I'm also giving him his space.
Isa pa, he's the eldest among the Ongpauco siblings. I know he's wrecked with what
his brother is going through right now. I was with him when he learned about the
accident. It was way past midnight, duon ako sa condo niya natulog nun, parehas
kaming nagising because of the blaring ringtones of our phones. Lake called him and
Kim called me.
Kim said that she learned about the accident because of Jamie. Jamie was watching
River's race live, apparently. Kim woke up with Jamie's terrified screams and sobs.
I can even hear her that time, she was wailing so loud. It was heartbreaking.
Hindi ko masisisi si Jamie. It was the guy she's in love with kahit na he's a
douche to her.
She was a mess and Kim didn't know how to comfort her kaya she called for back-up.
In other words, pinapauwi na niya ako that time.
But I was torn. I have Kade to think about too. To say he was shocked learning what
happened to his youngest brother was an understatement.
It was the first time I saw him that terrified and close to tears. But he held his
own. Of course he wouldn't cry in front of me. He's a proud guy. Kahit na its
stupid to keep his emotions from me, naintindihan ko.
So now I'm here in my room three days later, trying real hard not to smother Kade
with my text messages. I'm not a clingy person but I just can't help but worry. I
want to talk to him every time but I know he's busy. I want to know if he's okay,
if he has eaten or if he even slept. Gusto ko lang din naman siyang i-comfort just
like what he does to me every time I'm a mess.
Gods. Fuck this. I'm gonna text him. It has been an hour naman since the last time
I texted him.
Hey. Any news?
A reply from him came after ten minutes. See? He's really busy.
Just got a call from his team. He's still in coma.
Don't tell Jamie. He wouldn't want her to worry.
The four of us, Kade, Lake, Kim and I decided not to tell Jamie the full extent of
River's condition. She knows he's in coma pero ang alam niya (at nang iba) na it
was medically-induced coma and his other injuries. We were all thankful that his
physical injuries were considered not career-ending type. The only problem was his
mental health. There's
no brain damage but he just won't wake up on his own. The Ongpaucos and his team
decided not to tell the public about this. She and everyone else didn't know that
River might not wake up at all.
I sighed. Kahit gaano siya kagago kay Jamie, I wouldn't wish this for him. I hope
he wakes up na. It pains me to see his brother, Kade, worried sick.
How about you? Are you okay?

I'm trying. I need to be.
I felt my eyes sting. Ang hirap ng posisyon niya. He has to be strong because he's
the eldest among the Ongpauco children. He needs to set an example for his younger
siblings. They need to see him strong so they wouldn't lose hope. They need to know
he will be there to protect and guide them sa mga ganitong oras. He needs to be
their kuya.
But he needs someone, too. Kailangan niya din ng magko-comfort sa kanya.
I sighed and squared my shoulders as I construct a new text message for him. What
should I say?
Do you want me there?
Fuck. What if he says 'no'?
Do you want me to comfort you?
Who the fuck asks that kind of question? Syempre if you want to cmfort someone, you
just do it. You don't ask!
I can help you forget for a while.
Good gods. That sounded so slutty it makes me cringe so hard.
Can I come over?
There. Mukha namang okay yan, right? It sounds so casual. Hindi mukhang mao-offend
if ever he says 'no'. I can just reply back with an 'okay'.
Why am I over-thinking this? It's just Kade.
Yeah,
it's just Kade. The guy you're in love with. The guy you consider as your North
Star. Your go-to guy. Your lover and ex-boyfriend. Yeah, it's just him.
Hindi naman siguro masama na ako yung taong magbibigay sa kanya nun, right? Even
though we have broken up, I still care about him. I still love him. He has always
been there for me. It's the time for me to be his north star. I hope I can be as
half as comforting as he is.
Sana kayanin ko. Even though I'm not exactly in the right place to comfort because
of my own issues with myself and my family, hindi naman masamang mag-try na siya
naman ang damayan ko now.
I need to forget about myself and my problems even just for today. Because I know
it in my heart that he really, really needs someone right now. Kung ano mang
gagawin niya sa akin? I don't care. Bahala siya.
If he fucks me into oblivion, I don't care. I did that to him before. If he just
wants to cuddle, I can be the big spoon. If he just wants to talk, he can talk my
ears off. Or if he just wants me there, I can just sit beside him and hold his
hand. Walang problema.

Please.
I sighed. Thank the gods we're different in some ways. He's not pushing me away.
***
I looked at my reflection in the mirror. I'm done applying light make-up and I'm
done tying my hair in a messy bun. I'm wearing a loose blue v-neck shirt, bermuda
shorts and my trusty white chucks. I'm all set. I'll be in his condo in no time.
I was about to leave my room when I
heard a loud knock on my bedroom door.
I know it's Jamie. Kami lang naman ang nasa apartment because Kim has classes pa in
the uni for her master's degree. Ano kayang meron kay Jamie? Shit. Baka she read or
heard something on the news about her ex-boyfriend!
I walked up to the door and schooled my face before opening it.
"What's up?" I asked her as I put on my wristwatch. I acted cool.
Jamie strutted inside my room and look around. Anong meron? She looks stressed.
Baka tungkol nga kay River kung bakit siya pumunta dito.
Jamie faced me and I watch her chew her lower lip. "Nakalimutan kong bumili ng pads
kahapon. Meron ka pa ba?" she asked as she scratched her head.
I fight off the urge to sigh in relief. Wala pa naman akong ready na lie if ever
she confronts me about knowing and hiding vital information about her ex-boyfriend.
Mahirap na. Buti na lang talaga at pads lang ang concern niya ngayon.
I rolled my eyes at her. Kahit kalian talaga.
I pointed at my bathroom door. "Meron pa. Kunin mo sa sink," I told her. She
immediately went inside the bathroom to get it. I shook my head as I walked up to
my bed. I took my bag and sling it on my shoulder.
"Bayaran na lang kita. Wait lang," Jamie said when she came out of the bathroom.
I shook my head no. "No need. I'm about to leave na din," I said, heading towards
my bedroom door.
Jamie just shrugged.
Wala ba akong nakalimutan? It feels like meron. I did an inventory.
Phone... Wallet... Keys...
"Sure ka? Okay lang na free na to?" J asked when we got outside of my room. I just
nodded as I closed and locked my room.
Back to inventory, Lipstick... Foundation... Cheek and lip tint...
"Ang galante mo din minsan no?" I heard her sigh. "Ako nanghihinayang," J mumbled
under her breath.
Earrings... Wristwatch... Shit, may nakalimutan talaga ako e. I just can't remember
it.
"Saan?" I asked distractedly.
"Dito sa sanitary pads. Hindi mo pa nabubuksan e," she said.
I raised my head from my bag and my eyes landed on the unopened pack of sanitary
pads.
Fuck.
"Anyway, thanks, L! Maliligo na ko!" Tumalikod siya bago mag-wave ng hand. "Ingat
sa pagda-drive sa daan! Huwag ka sanang madisgrasya!"
Shit. Nadisgrasya na ata ako.
I took my phone out and did the mental count. Fuck no! I opened the calendar app on
my phone to confirm the mental count I did.
I gasped. Alam ko na kung anong nakalimutan ko!
Fuck. I forgot to have my period. Putangina. That sounded so stupid.
I forgot that I haven't got my period is what I'm saying!
My eyes widened as I stared at the numbers on the screen of my phone.
My calendar app says I'm four days late.
=================
Chapter 34: P-Word
Chapter 34
P-Word
Four Months Ago...
Oh my gods. No. Hindi pwede! Malabong mangyari ang iniisip ko.
Don't over-react. Don't over-think!
It's just four days. It's not that bad to be four days late, right? I should freak-
out if its four weeks or four months, right? Not four days.
But... My previous red days were always on time. If anything, period ko lang ang
hindi nali-late! Yun lang ang on-time sa buong buhay ko. Oh my gods. Hindi
irregular ang menstruation cycle ko. Yes, I'm really stressed these past few weeks
but I know I'm healthy.
No, late lang talaga ako. There are first time for everything. Nagkataon lang to.
Stressed lang siguro talaga ako at hindi na kaya ng immune system ko na labanan
ito.
But I can't disregard the fact that I'm sexually-active now. Maybe that bit has an
effect too? Maybe my hormones are all over the place because of that. Kade and I
always use protections! Ever since he popped my fucking cherry, we used one. We
never-holy fucking shit.
There was one time in the bathroom. We had unprotected sex under the shower after I
we came back from the hospital. I was so upset that time and I just wanted to
forget what I saw in the hospital. We were so caught up in the moment that we
forget to use protections.
And he-he came inside me.
My knees weakened. I immediately opened the front door and went out. Raking my
hair with both hands, I leaned back on our apartment's front door and took slow,
deep
breaths.
No. I can't be pregn-No. Don't go there.
Don't think about the P-Word.
Don't even think about it.
***
Where the heck are you, Salazar? Bagal.
I stared at his text message for like an entire minute. Should I reply? I think I
should, but my hands are numb. I think it's a miracle that I got into his condo
building without getting into an accident. I didn't even know how I got here. I was
in a daze after the possibility of a pregnancy sunk into my head.
I've decided... And I don't know if he will support me with my decision.
I never thought I would ever feel like this as I walk at the hallway that leads to
Kade's unit. It feels like I'm walking at the death row. It feels like I'm walking
towards my impending doom.
I stopped at his door and almost turned back. How will I tell him? How will he
react? How are we gonna face this? Together? Or apart?
I swallowed loudly and stood straight. I said a little prayer before I raising my
hand and started knocking on his door. I steeled myself when I heard his footsteps
padded on his carpeted floor. I almost dropped my jaw when his door opened.
He's wearing a white shirt and pajama bottoms. There are bed imprints on his face
and it looked like he just woke up. He looked adorable and sexy as hell.
Good gods. He looked so calm and laid-back. How am I gonna tell him everything? He
has no idea I'm about to drop a bomb
on him. He might hate me after this meeting.
He smiled at me lazily. "Hey."
"I'm late," I blurted out without thinking. My eyes widened as I waited for his
response.
His grin widened. "Babe, you're always late." Oh. He didn't get it.
I squeezed my eyes shut as I shake my head. "No, I mean my period's late."
I waited for his reaction. He just frowned. "And..?" He still didn't get it.
I just stared at him, waiting for him to understand what I just said.
Suddenly, his eyes widened. "Oh. Fuck." He blinked his eyes twice and we just stand
there in his doorway.
I pushed him away gently and walked inside his unit. "Fuck indeed," I said with a
deep sigh.
"Are you okay?" he asked as he watched me sit down on his leather couch.
I raked my hair with my right hand. "I think I am... I dunno. I might have freaked
out earlier," I said, watching him as he sat beside me.
Kade rubbed his jaw. "Shit. This is my fault."
I frowned. Paanong naging kasalanan niya? "What do you mean?"
"We were always cautious. We never failed to use protections except for that one
time." Yeah. That one time when we were overcome with our emotions... and lust, of
course.
"Yeah. When we showered together."
Kade pulled me towards him and I settled on his lap. "Fuck. I'm so sorry, babe." He
buried his face on my neck as he tighten his arms around me.
I didn't move and stayed stiff in his arms. "We were both caught up in the moment.
It's my fault as much
as yours."
We were both silent for about a minute.
Kade broke the ice. He pulled away from me and I can see the worry in his face.
"What are we gonna do about it? How many days have you been late? Have you called a
doctor? Since when did you know?" Kade bombarded me with questions, his tone
nervous and worried.
"I'm four days late. But my period is always on time. I realized it kanina lang," I
answered honestly. "Kade, I don't know what to do next."
Kade hands found my face and he massaged my cheekbones. I don't why but it made me
more nervous. Why is he making me relax? Hindi ba siya natatakot? Why is he not
freaking out? Why is he not hyperventilating? Why am I still here? Why is he not
asking me to leave him alone right now?
"Do you want to see a doctor? Do you want me to set up an appointment?" he asked,
his voice gentler.
I shook my head. "I'm scared..."
He nodded. "I am too. I'll go with you, Salazar. I'll never leave your side."
What did he just say? He'll go with me? He'll never leave my side? Hanggang kalian?
Until he knows that I made up my mind? Until he knows I'm the worst woman he's ever
met?
I scrambled off his lap and stand up. "I-I think I should go."
Kade stood up too. "What? Why?" he asked, confusion etched in his face.
I took a step back from him. "I need to be alone. I need to think."
Kade grabbed a hold of my wrist. "I don't want you alone. We did this together and
I'm not about to walk out on you now." He's smiling and
I can see the hope in his eyes. I turned away from him. It's just too much for me
to take in.
I shook my head and tried to pull away from him. "Please... I just need time to
think.'
His grip loosened but his arms circled around me. "I'm sorry. Did I freak you out
with the doctor thing?" he asked. I tried to move away from him. It feels like the
room was closing up on us. It feels like there's a huge lump on my throat and I'm
fucking choking in it. "What do you want? What do you prefer? Do you want me to buy
pregnancy test kit for you? You know what? I think I'll go and buy now."
"Wait, Kade..." I put my hands on his chest and pushed him away gently.
"Louisse, babe... Whatever the result is... I'll never leave your side, okay?" Kade
took both of my hands. He's oblivious that I'm about to pass out. "We're in this
together."
I shook my head to make him stop but he continued to talk. "I mean, if it's
negative. It's good, right? But if it's positive... I have experience with my sibs.
I think I can be a good fath-"
"Kade, I won't keep it," I blurted out as the panic clamped on my throat.
"What?" Kade asked after a minute.
I cleared my throat. "I can't keep it," I said it again, my voice weak.
"Why?" he asked. Confusion, anger and pain were evident in his eyes .Just reading
his body language... you can tell he's about to explode.
I took a deep breath before I explained my decision. "Kade, I can't have a kid. I'm
just a kid myself." I paused and took and deep breath again. Kade was quietly
waiting for me
to continue. "We just graduated and I don't have concrete plans with my future but
you... You have law school to think about."
Kade nodded. "But we will manage," he insisted.
I know we will but... "No, Kade. Ayoko... I'm not ready yet."
To say Kade was stunned was an understatement. He was gob-smacked. He was hurt. He
was furious.
"That's it? You made up goddamned mind without asking me first?" Kade exploded. "So
what? You came here just to drop that fucking bomb on me? What am I here? You're
fucking boy toy? Don't I have a say on this?" He was breathing hard. His nostrils
were flaring, his jaw clenched and his eyes were hard.
I throw my hands up in the in frustration. Why can't he understand the point I'm
trying to make? "Use your fucking head, Ongpauco! We both have a lot on our plates.
My dad's dying and I haven't made peace with him! And you, I'm not gonna let you
ruin your life because of me!"
"You're not ruining my life! I'm not gonna take up law anymore, Salazar."
"What?!" I sputtered. "Kailan pa?" As far as I know, studying law was his dream! He
can't just drop it like that!
Kade shrugged like it was nothing. "I've decided just now and my father is against
it naman. So why bother, right? No one's gonna pay for my tuition fee." I gaped at
him. I can't believe I'm hearing this from him of all people. Kade wants to be a
lawyer. I know his father's opinion don't matter to him. I know even if his father
won't support him, he's gonna work his ass off to pay for his tuition fee. He's
that determined!
"We can do this, Salazar. I know you're scared... Fuck, I'm terrified. But we can
do this."
I shook my head. "No, Kade. We're too young for t his responsibility," I said, my
voice firm.
Realizing I won't back down, Kade's shoulders sagged. "Stay here. I-I need to leave
for a few minutes." He snatched the car keys on the center table.
He's leaving?!
"Kade..." I called him, trying to stop him from leaving.
Kade faced me and raised a hand to stop me. "Please, just stop for now, okay? I
need to clear my head. I need to leave but I need you to stay here."
Pero masamang umalis ng galit! I don't want him to do something out of impulse
because he's mad. "Kade..."
Kade shook his head. "Please, Louisse... I don't want to say something I'll regret.
I need to leave for a few minutes."
What he said stung. So he's thinking something... something bad about me. He
doesn't want me know what are they. It's probably true. It will hurt me but it's
probably true.
"Lock the door," was the last thing he said before I heard his front door slammed
shut.
Minutes turned to hours but I still patiently waited for him to return. I know he's
hurt... he's devastated with my decision. What did I expect? He loves kids. He
loves his baby sisters. He's a family guy. He'll do anything and everything for
them.
And kahit hindi pa confirmed... just the thought of losing something you never knew
you wanted probably killed him inside. But I think what hurt him more was that I
didn't ask for
his opinion first before I made up my mind. He's gonna lose something important to
him and he doesn't have the power to stop it.
I fell asleep on his couch for what seems like three hours. I woke up with a start
when I felt the couch dipped. The first thing I saw is Kade. He's looming over me,
his eyes were guarded.
It hurts seeing him like that.
I sat up and he patiently waited for me.
"I'm sorry for being a douche," he started, his voice was eerily calm. "You were
right; we're too young for this. I don't like your decision but I'll still support
you no matter what."
I stared at him, too tongue-tied to form a coherent sentence. I don't know but I
don't like seeing him like this. He's guarded and cool as a cucumber. He's acting
like parang hindi siya nagalit sa akin kanina.
"I'm sorry too, Kade," I said, trying to get a genuine reaction from him.
He looked away from me. "I am too. But it's your body. You're the only person who
knows what's best for you," he said. It was like I wasn't talking to the Kade I was
with earlier. His voice was like a monotonous PSA voice-over in commercials.
"I hate it. I hate this," I said. He has to know na hindi ko naman to ginusto.
"I know you are. Let's just hope the result is negative." He pointed at the center
table and I saw a plastic bag from the local drug store. I stood up and take it. I
almost dropped the plastic bag when I saw what's inside.
There were three boxes of pregnancy test kits.
With my shaking hands, I put the plastic bag back on the center table. "Can I do it
tomorrow? I don't think I can do this today," I said with a small voice.
Kade just nodded as he stared at my midriff.
It was like we were thousand miles apart when I'm just standing three feet away
from him. He remain seated on the couch, stoic. And I'm just standing there in
front of him... dying inside.
Kade may think I'm just being practical... that I'm being heartless... But he
doesn't know making this kind of decision killed me. He didn't know a little part
of me just died.
=================
Chapter 35: Good News
Chapter 35
Good News
Four Months Ago...
"The number you have dialed is either unattended or out of coverage area. Please
try again later."
I've been trying to reach Kade pero kanina ko pa siya hindi ma-contact. Hindi ko
tuloy maiwasang isipin na iniiwasan niya ako. Maybe he's still hurt... No, I know
he's still hurt and angry with me and my decision.
But we had an agreement yesterday.
Before he dropped me off last night, we agreed I'll take the test today in his
unit. He said he'll fetch me around 2 o'clock in the afternoon. Pero alas tres na!
I haven't received a single text from him.
I get that he's angry. Ako rin naman galit sa sarili ko. No matter what the result
is, I'm gonna hate myself forever. Does he think madali lang sakin ang lahat? If
the result is positive, I know I won't keep it. If the result comes negative, I
will still hate myself for thinking of... doing that to my own kid.
I sighed and sit up on my bed. I've decided, if I still won't get a hold of him
aalis muna ako to distract myself. Maybe I should think of my other issues first.
Maybe I should go to my father. Maybe I should go there to make peace with him.
Maybe I should ask for my mother's advice... but I know I won't. Ayokong makadagdag
sa iniisip niya.
So yes to Papa. No to talking to Mama.
I took my phone and dialed Kade's number, hoping the other line will ring this time
and that
he'll answer.
try again later."
Of course, God probably hates me right now.
***
"Napadalaw ka yata," mama said when I entered papa's hospital room.
I stopped walking and stand awkwardly in front of the entrance. "I can leave if you
want to."
Mama shook her head. "No. Dito ka lang." She stood up. "I need to settle your
papa's hospital bills. Dito ka muna at bantayan mo siya."
I watched her gather her things and take some papers from the dining table. Those
were probably papa's hospital bills and copies of his medical records.
I looked at my dad who's peacefully sleeping in his bed. Medyo tumaba siya from the
last time I've seen him. I hope that's a good thing. He's still pale but he looks
better now. I hope he's responding to the treatment very well.
I walked at the foot of papa's bed and look back at mama. "Okay. I can do that."
She nodded. "I won't be gone too long."
I shrugged. "Take your time, ma." Looking after papa won't be a chore for me. It's
the least thing I can do for him now.
Mama smiled, her eyes getting soft. "You talk to your papa, okay?"
I didn't answer. I watched her compose herself first before she left. She's so
strong. Bakit hindi ko yun namana sa kanya?
I sighed as I take a seat on the chair on papa's side. "Hi, pa," I greeted him
lamely.
Of course hindi siya sumagot. It took me a minute
before I continued. I just can't seem to form any words. Siguro natatakot rin akong
naririnig niya nga ako at may masabi akong ikaka-disappoint niya.
Like this pregnancy scare I'm having.
I cleared my throat and take a deep breath. "I didn't want to see you like this,
just so we're clear." Sino bang gugustuhing makitang nasa ganitong kondisyon ang
kanyang papa?
I took his hand and wince when I felt it was cold. I got scared for a second but
the steady pulse on his wrist calmed me. "It's hard for me to talk to you like
this, papa. You always have an answer, a sarcastic quip for everything. Mama said I
got my sarcastic streak from you, diba? Pati pagiging pessimistic ko, she said I
got it from you. We're too much alike."
I hugged his hand and tried my hardest not to cry. I held back the tears that
started to pool my eyes. Hindi naman ma-appreciate ni papa yung pag-iyak ko. I know
he wants us to be stong. Isa pa, I know mama cried for all of us already.
I want to tell him to wake-up.I want to tell him everything although I know he'll
be disappointed... I know he will be mad, furious even. I want to tell him I need
my father right now. I need his to knock some sense into my head. I need him to
just be there for me. "I hope you're too drugged up to remember this, but papa... I
messed up so bad. I don't know how to undo the horrible things I said and what I'm
about to do."
If he knew what I'm about to do kung hindi papabor ang result sa akin, he'll be
furious. Baka itakwil nila ako ni mama. But what am I supposed to do? Hindi pa ako
handa.
I'm too young for that kind of responsibility. Oo, I should've known the
consequences before I had sex with Kade. I know he's ready to step up to the plate.
I've seen it in his eyes last night. He's dying to tell me na if ever the result
came positive, he wants me to push through it.
Pero I just can't do it.
"Naiinis ako sa sarili ko. You know I hate drama yet I created all these mess. I
avoided you." Good gods. I even hurt the guy I'm in love with. I'm that fucked up.
"It took me what? 6-7 months para lang kausapin ka. And this conversation doesn't
count pa because you're too drugged up to respond. You're sleeping while I'm
blabbing nonsense here."
I'm probably worse than my dad. Yes, iniwan niya kami but he came back. I don't
know the set-up with his second family but it looks like pinanindigan niya pa rin
sila even though he came back to us.
And then there's me. Just thinking about doing it... Gods, I can't even say the
word. Just considering doing it is bad enough. But deciding to do it? I know it is
the worst thing ever.
I squeezed my eyes shut and let the tears fall. No one can see me crumbling here.
No one can hear me naman. "I want to forgive you, papa. But I need to know the
truth. I need to know everything and I'm ready to hear your side. I just wish sa'yo
ko marinig yun. Please wake up and beat cancer's ass, okay? Do it for me and for
your babes."
I'm ready to forgive him. Because experiencing what I'm going through now? I
learned that everybody sin differently. We can't just judge everyone's decisions or
choices.
Different perspectives... Different views... Different opinions... Mistakes,

solutions, the entire situation...
***
I tried to get a hold of Kade again. Siguro naman may signal na wherever he is.
It's almost 6 o'clock in the evening, siguro naman naaalala niyang may nakalimutan
siyang plans with me. Or kahit man lang maisip niyang wala siyang signal at hindi
pa kami nag-uusap today.
try again later."
I sighed. Sabi ko nga. God probably hates me. I'm sure I have a spot in hell next
to Lucifer.
I put my phone on my pocket and went straight to the hospital's common comfort
room. I was about to enter the first empty cubicle when I heard a loud retching
sound. I stopped dread on my tracks and waited for the person to come out of the
cubicle.
Wala pang ilang minuto, lumabas na siya. It was like I was sucker punched when I
saw the retching pregnant girl come out of the cubicle. She went straight to the
sink and cleaned herself. I just stood there, watching her every move. Eventually,
I caught her attention.
"Pasensya na kung maingay ako," she said with a weak voice.
I don't know why but I found myself walking up close to her. "Are you okay?" I
asked her. I noticed she's sweating buckets and she's too pale.
She nodded. "Okay lang ako. Effects lang ng morning sickness." She laughed a little
when she saw my brows shot up. "Oo, alam ko gabi na. Hindi rin ako informed na
morning sickness lang ang tawag sa kanya pero
pang 24/7 pala talaga siya."
I blinked twice. Shit. Am I gonna be like her if the result came positive? Bakit
parang wala lang sa kanya? She even looks younger than me.
"Are you sure you're okay"? I asked again, I felt queasy just looking at her pale
face. Parang mahahawa ako sa pagiging nauseous niya.
I need a candy. I took one out from my pocket and popped one into my mouth after
unwrapping it. I noticed she eyed mine kaya binigyan ko din siya.
"Thank you. Kailangan ko niyan, baka bumaba sugar ko e."
Uhm, okay. So what now? Am I just going to leave her here? Nawala na rin ang call
of nature. Should I assist her back to wherever her companion is?
"Do you need assistance ba? Should I call a nurse? Or your husband?" I asked her.
I'm not comfortable to leave her here alone.
I don't know what I said but she just started crying. Shit!
"Hindi ko kailangan ng asawa!" she said between hiccups.
Fuck. Fuck you and your big mouth, L. Okay na siya kanina. You had to ask pa talaga
about her supposed husband. Kita namang mas bata siya sa'yo!
"I'm so sorry," I said before taking three rolls of tissues from the tissue
dispenser and giving it to her.
She took it and wiped her tears. "Yang mga lalaking talagang yan! Matapos kang
dalhin sa ligaya, bigla ka na lang iiwan kapag hirap na pinagdadaanan."
Good gods.
"Oo, kasalanan ko rin kasi pumayag ako. Mahal ko e." She blew her nose on the
tissue. "Makati din ako e. Nasarapan, umulit. Ayan! May nabuo! Tama
sila. Masyado nga tayong mapusok."
Damn it. Sa lahat ng makakasama ko sa banyo, she had to be a scorned pregnant girl.
"Pero nandito na to e. Hindi ko naman to pwedeng ipa-abort. Baby ko to e." She

wiped her tears and offered me a watery smile. My heart squeezed seeing this
vulnerable pregnant girl. "Blessing ang isang baby." I swallowed loudly as I watch
her palm her baby bump. It looks like she's about to pop anytime!
My eyes met hers when she started talking again. "At saka, sa dami ng taong hindi
kayang magkaanak ngayon kahit anong gawin nila... Iniisip ko na lang na blessed ako
dahil binigyan ako nung bagay na pinagkait sa iba. Sino ba naman ako para tanggihan
tong mumunting milagro sa sinapupunan ko?"
"Kahit mag-isa ka lang? Kakayanin mo?" I asked without thinking.
"Oo naman." She smiled again. "Wala nang atrasan to, miss."
"Never pumasok sa isip mo na... ipa-abort ang baby mo?" Just saying the word left a
bitter aftertaste in my mouth.
Her smile wavered. "Magsisinungaling ako kung sinabi kong hindi." I notice her arms
wrapped around her belly. She's unconsciously protecting her baby. "Tao lang naman
ako para makapag-isip ng ganung bagay. Pero naisip ko ring tao lang ako at hindi
ako Diyos. Hindi ko kayang pagbayarin yung inosente para sa kasalanang ako ang
gumawa. Gets mo ba?"
She turned my back on me and washed her hands again. "Hindi naman kasi pwedeng
maitama ng kasalanan ang isang pagkakamali, diba?" she asked, looking at me through
the mirror.
But didn't she think na
she has a choice? Or baka she's doing it for moral-obligations lang but not for
herself? "Pero pano kung yung 'maling bagay' ang makakapagpabuti sa lahat?"
She shrugged. "Hindi ko alam. Makakapagpabuti nga ba? O para lang maging madali ang
mga bagay-bagay?"
Damn it. She got me there. For a young woman, mukhang mas matino pa siyang mag-isip
sa akin. Clearly, she got her shit together.
"Alam kong mahirap yung papasukin ko mag-isa, pero hindi naman ibibigay sakin tong
pagsubok na to kung hindi ko naman kayang harapin mag-isa. Tsaka isa pa, nandyan
naman ang pamilya ko."
The scene at papa's hospital room flashed in my head. "Hindi ba sila nagalit
sa'yo?"
She heaved a deep sigh. "Syempre nagalit. Tinapon ko daw kinabukasan ko e."
"But eventually, they supported you, right?"

She nodded. "Na-excite din sila sa baby. First apo kasi."
Pero iba naman ang situation namin. From the sounds of it, she doesn't have a dying
parent and it seemed like the only person who's not in the picture is her ex.
"If you don't mind me asking... How about your ex?"
She faced me again. "Wala na siya sa picture. Para sa ikabubuti na rin yun ng lahat
lalo na ng baby."
I frowned. Why? Just thinking about Kade, my heart squeezed hard. Shit. Swerte ako
sa part na yun. Even though he hated my decision, he still chose to support me.
"Bakit? I mean, you have rights... Lalo na sa financial assistance from him."
The pregnant girl shook her head. "Hindi na. Para saan pa ang tulong niya? Hindi
namin siya kailangan ng baby ko kung sa una palang hindi na niya kami pinanindigan.
Nauna siyang mag give-up, sumunod na rin ako. Para saan pa kung aasa ako sa taong
hindi naman ako pinakinggan at pinahalagahan, diba?"
***
I can't take this anymore. The pregnant girl was just the start. All the way from
the hospital until I reached the apartment, all I can see is... babies. It's like
the universe conspired against me just to fuck with my head.
I got lost in the hospital and I found myself in front of the hospital's nursery
window. It took all of my strength not to run away like a mad woman.
And then I got stuck in EDSA. Okay lang sana yun para may alone time ako para
makapag-isip sa mga sinabi ni pregnant girl. But my attention was caught by a
diaper ad print on the back of the bus that's conveniently in front of me. How
nice, right?
I decided to kill time on Facebook. But what do you know? There were tons of
pregnancy announcements on my timeline I almost threw my phone out of the car
window.
I slumped on my bed. I turned my head and stared at the local drugstore's plastic
bag in my bedside table. I snatched it. With a heavy breath, I sat up and take all
of the pregnancy test kits Kade bought me yesterday. I read the each instructions.
Magkakaiba kasing klase ang binili niya.
"Fuck. Am I gonna do this now? Alone?"
The pregnant girl's words started to float in my head again. Her words made a lot
of sense. For someone so young, she's bravely facing pregnancy all alone.
And I'm
here... Thinking of not keeping it if the result came positive.
Not being a judgemental bitch, but it looks like I have a better life than her in
terms of money. I have my own savings. With my parents naman, I think they will be
mad at first but they'll accept it later on. Because just like what the pregnant
girl said, I know they will get excited with their first apo.
Good gods. That word.
And then there's Kade... He said he's got my back no matter what. My only problem
is myself. Because I know I'm not geared up for this kind of responsibility. I'm
nowhere near stable. I'm not emotionally, physically, spiritually and mentally
stable for this kind of responsibility.
I can't raise a kid. Hell, I'm just a kid myself.
Alam ko kapag nalaman ng iba, hindi nila maiintindihan. They'll think I'm an
idiot... a cold-hearted bitch. An immoral person.
Gods, what would my friends say? Si Jamie? Si Asher? Shit, what would Kim say?
But what if... ituloy ko? What if kayanin ko? Holy tacos, never in my entire life
have I carried a baby in my arms. And now there's a possibility that I'll have one
myself?
"Hindi ko kayang pagbayarin yung inosente para sa kasalanang ako ang gumawa."
I squeezed my eyes shut. She's right... An innocent can't be punished for something
he/she didn't do.
"Hindi naman kasi pwedeng maitama ng kasalanan ang isang pagkakamali, diba?"
So, what should I do? Keep it? Woman up and take the responsibility?
Is
it that bad, Louisse? Will I regret this in the future? But what about Kade's
future? He's ready to give it up for me.How about mine? Can I devote it to a kid?
To MY kid? To Kade's kid?
Just thinking that its Kade's makes my heart ache even more. Kalahating ako.
Kalahating siya. Am I ready to give that up? Para sa future ko? Sa future niya?
"Makakapagpabuti nga ba? O para lang maging madali ang mga bagay-bagay?"
Ayoko man isipin but the kid can be an inconvenience too. I don't have any concrete
plans with my life but I still have dreams and I want them to come true someday.
It'll be more difficult for me to make them come true if I already have a kid.
What if I become successful but I'll end up alone? Won't I regret this decision? I
sound so fucking selfish.
I'm not so sure anymore. I need to talk to him. Now.
I called Kade again.
try again later."
Where the heck is he now? Why can't I get a hold of him?
I need to talk to him. I need him to knock some sense into my head. I need to hear
what he wanted to say yesterday. I need him here with me. I need him to hold my
hand as I wait for the result of my pregnancy tests!
I can't take it anymore. I can't just move around and not know what's happening
inside my body.
I tried to calm myself. I wiped the tears that I didn't notice rolled down my
cheeks. I tried to breathe normally and forced myself not to hyperventilate.
And
I did something I thought I'll never do. I sent Kade the most terrifying text I
have ever sent.
I need you.
"Oh my God! Thank you God! Lord, ang awesome mo talaga! Sobrang thank you!" I
startled when I heard Kim's voice just outside of my room. Nandito na siya? Shit.
Gabi na pala! I scrambled out of my bed and hide my pregnancy test kits under my
pillow.
I ran and went out of my bedroom. I stood just outside my door and guarded my
bedroom. Kim didn't notice my stiff stance.
"L! Naku! Oh my God! May good news from France!" Kim squealed.
I managed to fake a smile. "What is it? May balita na kay River?" I asked, somehow
knowing it's about River.
Kim nodded while sporting a huge grin. "Yes! Hindi mo pa ba alam? Gising na siya!
Tsaka in a matter of days, pwede na siyang iuwi dito sa Pinas!"
"That's great news! Does Jamie know?" I asked with my first genuine smile today.
"Yeah. Tinawagan din siya ni Kade kanina. Alam na niyang okay na talaga si River."
I let out a sigh. At least nabawasan na yung iniisip ni Jamie at ni Kade.
Wait... Kade?!
"What?" Did I hear her right? "Si Kade ang nagbalita sa'yo?" I asked, confused.
Paanong...?
Kim nodded, her brows furrowed. "Yeah. Bakit? Wala ka talagang alam? Hindi ka
tinawagan ni Kade?" she asked.
I shook my head. My heart started to pound against my chest and my hands started to
get clammy. "No... I tried to call him pero unattended naman."
Her eyes widened. "Oh. Nagpalit yata siya ng
number? Or baka roaming number niya yun since nasa Monaco sila ngayon."
WHAT THE FUCK?! "Ha? Since when?" I was just with him yesterday! Is she shitting
me?
Kim looked at her wristwatch, oblivious at the tears pooling in my eyes. "Balita ko
kakarating lang nila. Kagabi lang din daw sila umalis."
I looked away from her and blinked until my eyes cleared. "Uhm, okay. Sige. I need
to do something pa."
I was about to leave when she stopped me. "Wait lang, L. Are you okay?" she asked,
concern evident in her voice.
It was a good thing that I already turned my back on her. Because she will probably
know something is up if she sees my face. "Yeah. Uhh... Goodnight."
I went back to my room and tried my hardest not to slam my door shut. I leaned my
back on it and slid down until I was seated at the floor.
So that explains the unanswered calls and texts...
He left for Monaco when he just promised me last night that he will never leave my
side. He left when I needed him the most. He left when he agreed to be with me when
I take the pregnancy tests.
***
Hindi ko inakala na may kasamang lungkot ang mararamdaman ko nang makikita kong
NEGATIVE ang result ng pregnancy tests ko. I thought I was gonna be ecstatic.
Because... shit. I'm safe.
But to be honest, I've never felt more alone until now.
I learned that when I am faced with a huge responsibility, I balk. I thought of an

inhumane solution to my 'problem.'
I am a selfish person.
I hate myself even more now.
I also came to a conclusion. The only person I can trust and depend on is myself.
Nasaan na yung 'I will never leave your side' na sinasabi niya? Bakit wala siya
dito? Bakit kailangan kay Kim ko pa malaman na umalis siya papuntang Monaco para sa
kapatid niya? Is it that hard to call me? Is it that hard to send a fucking text? A
heads up?
Is he that angry with me? He can't talk to me anymore?
Sabagay, ano nga bang mas pipiliin niya? Yung babaeng kayang itapon yung
possibility ng future nila o yung kapatid niya na nandiyan parati para sa kanya at
mas kailangan siya ngayon?
"Para saan pa kung aasa ako sa taong hindi naman ako pinakinggan at pinahalagahan,
diba?"
Maybe Kade gave up on me because I was the one who gave up on the idea of us
first.
=================
Chapter 36: More Trouble
Chapter 36
More Trouble
Three Months Ago...
I popped the pill into my mouth and immediately sipped on my water bottle. I hope
the medicine will kick in faster. I can't take the pain anymore. But I'll take this
pain over an unwanted pregnancy, thank you very much.
Good gods, dysmenorrhea is kicking my ass.
I slammed the pill bottle and my water bottle on my bedside table before lying
down. Siguro kailangan ko lang ipahinga to. The stress and this delayed period were
talking its toll on my body. Baka after nito magkasakit pa ako. Huwag naman sana. I
can't afford to get sick now. I won't be able to look after papa if I get sick.
I jumped when I felt my phone vibrated on my lap. I took it and read the new text
message. I almost dropped my phone in my face when I saw who had sent the new text
message to me.
Can we talk?
And... he's back. 5 days. 5 days with no communication and he decided to send a
text asking for us to talk. I don't know what to think about that. Maybe I
shouldn't think about it at all. Besides, I'm not in the right frame of mind to
make any decisions right now.
I deleted his text message. I started to massage my lower abdomen when my phone
vibrated once again.
Salazar, please.
I deleted his new text message. I don't want to talk now. I understand
that he needed a breather kaya siya umalis. Now, ako naman ang may kailangan nun. I
hope he gets the hint.
I closed my eyes, blocking out his text messages and his face from my head. I was
having a terrific job until my phone vibrated and its shrill ringtone burst out of
its speakers. I opened my eyes and glared at my phone.
Cascade Ongpauco calling...
"Can you not take a fucking hint?" I murmured under my breath as I hit ignore. A
new text message popped in my phone's screen before I had the chance to drop my
phone.
Stop ignoring my texts and calls.
Well, too damn bad. I deleted his new text message. I threw my phone on my bedside
table after shutting it off. I was about to close my eyes again when I heard a
banging sound. I sat up and my eyes caught a movement from my bedroom window.
"Son of a..." I trailed off as I stared at Kade's eyes head on. I didn't say
anything and just watched him open-up the window and enter through it. Slowly, Kade
walked towards me.
He remained standing at the foot of my bed and I remained seated, looking up at

him. I can't believe he had the nerve to climb through the emergency exit and enter
through my window without asking for my permission.
"Hey," he said. I just stared at him. Kade bowed his head and heaved a deep sigh.
"How's River?" I asked, my gaze unwavering.
He looked back at me and smiled awkwardly. "So you knew
about that."
I nodded. "Yes, I heard it from Kim AND Jamie."
Kade heaved a heavy sigh. "Look, I had a lot of shit on my mind that day, okay? I
forgot about the pregnancy test. There's no other way to say this so I'm just gonna
spit it out. I messed up and I'm sor-" I raised my hand and interrupted him.
"Apology accepted."
Kade's brows furrowed, his head tilting to the side. "You didn't let me finish. You
haven't even heard my explanation."
I shook my head while wearing a tight smile. "I don't need one. You're forgiven."
Hindi ba dapat matuwa siya na ang dali ko siyang napatawad? He doesn't need explain
anything. I get it. I get it now. After being alone for five days, my head cleared
and I realized my mistakes and I started to understand why he left.
His brother was in coma. He needed to be there. Not just for River but for his
other brothers and sisters. They needed him to be there. He's their rock and there
are his.
At isa pa, he needed an escape from me. A breather, a space... I'm too bad for
him... too negative. See? Even I know that. Kung pwede ko lang layuan ang sarili ko
mismo, I would've done it too.
"I doubt that," Kade scoffed.
"Anyway, it's negative," I said with a shrug referring to the pregnancy tests I
took almost a week ago. I know it'll be a good news for him.
"Huh?"
I sighed. Paano ko ba ie-explain ito nang maayos? "The pregnancy test kit. The
result came negative."
"I thought you're gonna take the test only when I'm with you," he said,
confusion on his face.
"Yeah. That's what I thought too." Yun din ang akala ko. Well, I can't just wait
for him. Baka nabaliw na ako if I waited until now.
"You couldn't wait for me?" he asked, now annoyed.
I rolled my eyes at him. "No, Kade. I'm sorry I couldn't wait for you," I said, my
tone dripping of sarcasm. I jumped out of my bed and moved away from him. "I have a
life and as you probably know it's fucked up."
He shook his head. "But it doesn't have to be that way!"
I fight off the urge to laugh at his face. Ganun-ganun lang? "Easier said than
done, Ongpauco."
"It's probably for the best. You're not going to keep it anyway, right?" he said,
his tone cold and hard.
I tried to calm myself. What he said hit a nerve. "I was actually... warming up to
the idea. You're wrong."
"But that's what you said."
"Yes, that's exactly what I said before. But it was my initial reaction." Hindi
lang naman siguro ako ang nag-isip nun diba? Hindi naman ako siguro yung first ever
na nag-isip nun na nagkaroon ng pregnancy scare and I probably won't be the last.
"Do you know hard it was for me? I hated it at first but I started to think of the
'what ifs'. I started to think of the future with you... a family with you.
Contrary to what you believe, I'm not heartless. I was sad with that negative
result. In fact, I've never felt more lonely and alone that time."
Kade's shoulder slackened. "I'm so sorry, babe."
I gave him a quick smile. "I already said you're forgiven."
"Have
you seen a doctor?"he asked as he took a step closer to me.
I took a step back. "I don't need to. I just got my period yesterday." I felt my
lower abdomen contracted. Fuck. That hurt.
"Oh, alright..."
I moved away from him and went back to my bed. "Do you have anything you need to
say pa? If you don't, you can leave now. I'm having cramps and I think I need to
sleep it off. " I was about to sit down when Kade pulled my arm and made me stand
up in front of him. I was too close to him.
"See? You really haven't forgiven me. You're brushing me off."
I shook my head as I tried to step back. He held me back, his hands on my arms.
"Kade, I'm tired," I said, my tone almost whining.
Kade's hands tightened their grip on my arms. "I'm tired, too. I'm fucking
jetlagged but I'm here because I want to fix this."
I shook my head. "There's nothing to fix, Kade. I'm not pregnant. We don't have any
problem here."
"With the way you're acting right now, I know there's a problem, Salazar."
"There's no problem, Kade." He's starting to get on my nerves. Paulit-ulit na lang.

Wala ngang problema. Why can't he just stop asking questions and leave?
"Yes, we have! You're too closed-off. Your walls are too damn high, Salazar."
Kade's held my face with both of his hands. "Babe, what's wrong?" he asked as he
leaned his head down.
"You're imagining things, Ongpauco."
"I can't I fix this if you can't even tell me what the hell is wrong," he said, his
eyes pleading.
I looked away from his eyes and just stared at his lips."There's nothing wrong,
okay? I've always been like this diba."
"No, Salazar. When it comes to me, you're different." Kade lowered his face to
level our eyes."Baby, eyes on me." I did what I was told. "We're different when
we're together."
I closed my eyes. I need to shut him out.
"Look, I'm sorry for leaving without saying anything." I opened my eyes. I was
gonna stop him from explaining when he interrupted me. "No, listen. I was gonna
tell you we were leaving for Monaco that night. But when you told me your period's
late, I forgot all about it until it was time for us to leave. I didn't text and
call you because... yes, I wanted to give you and myself space and time to think."
I put my hands on his wrists and I pulled them off me. "I know you meant well,
Ongpauco. I understand why you had to leave. River needs you. Your sibs need you.
You don't have to apologize for that. Family first, right?"
Kade's face found my face once again. "But you needed me, too," he whispered, his
face just an inch away from mine. The way his eyes pleaded made my stomach squeeze
tight.
Oh my gods. This hurts too badly. Ang sakit-sakit. Why did I ever let myself fall
this hard? Maybe I should end it now bago pa mas sumakit.
"Yeah." I managed to swallow my emotions and gave him a fake smile. "But I
managed."
"You managed..." he repeated with a crest-fallen expression.
"Maybe it's time..." I trailed off, not knowing how to verbalize the words that
will end us.
Kade's
hand dropped. His expression hardens. "Time for what? To break up for real?" he
asked in a mocking tone. I didn't answer him, I just looked away from him.
I winced when I heard his mirthless laugh. "I saw this shit coming and I still did
nothing about it. I'm so fucking blind when it comes to you."
What did he just say? "What?"
"You have already decided."
"Decided what?" I asked, confused.
"You're putting a stop in this." He waved his hand between us. "You're stopping
us." He pointed his finger at me. "You really are giving-up on us."
I sucked a huge breath into my lungs to calm myself, to soothe my breaking heart.
Totoo naman yung mga sinabi niya. I'm putting a stop in this. Tinatapos ko na ang
lahat. I'm giving it all up kasi hindi na tama. Hindi na maganda yung nangyayari.
Sobrang nagkasakitan na. There's too much history between us. There are doubts and
ill-feelings deep inside us. There's no trust anymore. Sirang-sira na.
"What happens after this if we continue?" I asked him with a tired voice. "We're
too damaged to continue. You already have doubts about me and I'm just so fucking
tired with everything."
Kade just stared at me and my eyes never left his. I memorized each features of his
face. It feels like this would be the last time that we'll look at each other this
close. I know after this wala na.
"Dump me," he said all of a sudden.
"What?" I asked, eyes wide.
Kade's nostrils flared and his jaw clenched in anger. "I've had enough with this
bullshit self-pity of yours, Salazar. You're not the only one who has problems.
You're not the only one who has family issues. You're not the only one who's
hurting."
I just stood there, taking in all of his words. I just let him lash-out on me
because I know I deserve it. I deserve his anger.
"I've had enough of you rejecting me every time I try to break down your walls.
I've had enough of you shutting me out." Tears started to well in my eyes. I tried
to blink them away. "It's obvious that you don't want this. You don't want me
enough. You always drop me whenever you're in a fucked up place. Serious
relationships aren't like that, Salazar. I'm not a fucking fling."
You're not, Kade. That's why I'm stopping this. That's why I'm letting you go. He
deserves someone who appreciates him, someone who's worthy of his loyalty and love.
I am clearly not that girl.
"Dump me, Salazar! This is how it ends, you dumping me," he sneered at me. He was
so mad... so heartbroken. And I just stood there in front of him, pokerface in
place. "Go ahead! Dump me! You fucking don't want me. So just dump me, Louisse."
I just gave him a single nod, trying not to cry.
He scoffed. "You know what? You're more trouble than you're worth."
I felt a single tear rolled down my face. "I know," I whispered, my voice breaking.
Kade dragged his hands on his hair and pulled it, frustrated. "Fuck, I'm sorry I
didn't mean that."
We both know he did. He just didn't mean to say it in my face and hurt me like
that. "You do."
He took a step forward.. "Salazar..."
I took a step back and wiped my wet cheeks. "I need you to leave, Ongpauco."
He shook his head. "No..."
I put a hand on my chest as I felt my heart clenched. "Please leave. You've said
enough."
=================
Chapter 37: Bitter Pill
Chapter 37
Bitter Pill
Three Months Ago...
"L, tahan na," Jamie whispered as she taps on my shoulder.
I ignored her and continued to wail. Good gods. Whose idea was this? Bakit ako
sumama manuod ng the Fault in Our Stars? I'm such an idiot. I can't stop crying!
My father has cancer and here I am, crying after watching a cancer-themed movie!
Gods, just thinking about what Hazel Grace and Augustus went through... the same
thing my father is going through now, I can't help but cry.
"L, tahan na. Magkikita pa naman si Hazel Grace at Gus sa heaven."
Good for them! Good for Hazel Grace! Damn it, yung sa akin malabo na.
Gods, whay the heck did I watch that movie? I just cried buckets of tears last
night! I haven't moved on from the fight I had with Kade last night tapos ganito?
Iyakan sesh na naman?
I cried harder. Dito lang naman ako makakaiyak-makakahagulgol sa tapat nila. Kasi
after nito, I would stop na. HI won't let myself cry anymore. Ibubuhos ko na ang
lahat dito. Yung lahat ng luha na hindi ko nailabas. Lahat ng tungkol sa pamilya
ko, kay papa, kay Kade... sa pag-aaway namin kagabi.
I will cry for the end of 'us'.
I will cry for the hurtful words we said last night.
I will cry for that time he pleaded.
I will cry for the moment I decided to give up on him-on us.
I don't wanna cry anymore. It hurts so damn much.

I took deep breaths.
I'm still shaky and my eyes still stings. But I need to hold myself back. Tama na.
Louisse Salazar, get a fucking grip.
Kim reached out and handed me her bottled water. I took it from her and opened it.
I took a huge gulp and calmed myself. Tama na, Louisse. Ang arte-arte mo na.
"It hurts so damn much," I blurted out without thinking.
I noticed J's eyes squinted at me, like she's trying to read me. She can't know. I
need to distract them.
I stood up and faked a laugh. "I feel such a dork," I said. I bit my lower lip to
stop myself from crying again. Shit. I have gone this low. I've turned into a
pathetic, wailing girl.
I watched their faces and saw that they're both wearing a concerned expression.
Before they could ask if I'm feeling better na, I took their hand and dragged them
off their seats. "C'mon, let's eat our heart out." We left the cinema and decided
to eat at our favorite burger place in this mall.
Kim and Jamie treated me with kid gloves. Akala ata nila iiyak at any moment which
is funny. Hanggang sa pagkain, they're still watching over me. It feels weird these
two were taking of me now but at the same time... it feels good. It feels great to
give-up the mother hen role even just for now.
I looked at Jamie and saw her spacing out. I reached out and snapped my finger in
front of her. "Earth to Jamie."
She blinked her eyes twice. "Sorry," she mumbled.
"Iniisip mo na naman siya?" Kim asked her and she nodded. She's so transparent.
"May bagong updates?"
She
heaved a sigh. "Sabi sa akin ni Kade kahapon, ngayon daw ang dating nilang lahat
dito sa Manila."
I flinched at the mention of Kade's name. I just didn't expect it. I avoided their
eyes, mahirap na. Baka napansin nila. I wouldn't know what to say if they ask me
right now.
My head snapped up when I heard Jamie's loud gasp. Her eyes were about to pop out
of their sockets and her jaw was hanging.
"Why? What?" I asked. Shit. I hope it's not a bad news.
She shook her head. "Uhhh, wala. Speaking of the devil. Nagtext siya. I think
they're back in Manila."
Oh. Okay.
I just nodded and grabbed my burger. I continued to eat like nothing happened.
Shit, L. Your pokerface is failing you. Nasaan na ba siya? Why isn't it working
right now? I can't afford to get caught right now.
Tapos na kami. Wala na akong dapat aminin kasi... Why bother?

***
"Okay ka na?" Kim asked me as I flipped through the channels.
"Kim, for the hundredth time... okay na ako," I mumbled.
K just shrugged and leaned her back on the couch. Kanina pa kami nakatambay sa
sala. Walang magawa, walang mapanuod na matino. Pare-parehas kaming bored at medyo
tulala pa dahil sa hang-over over The Fault in Our Stars.
"L, what does falling in love feel like?" K asked all of a sudden.
I almost choked on my own spit because of the shock. "What the hell, Kim?" I
sputtered then laughed awkwardly.
"Curious lang," she said defensively.
I pointed at myself. "And I'm
the person you think who knows the answer?" Ako talaga? She doesn't even know I
just ruined the best damn thing that happened to me yesterday. Ang alam niya lang
ay puro flings lang ang naranasan ko.
"Bakit? Hindi ka pa ba naiin-love?" Kim asked, her eyes innocently staring back at
me.
I looked away from her and continued to flip the channels. Patay malisya. "Basta
ang alam ko... It hurts like a goddamned bitch if it's not the right one," I
answered as honestly as I could.
"Paano malalaman kapag yun na yung right one? Or kung maling klase ng love yun?"
I held back the urge to sigh. Kim, if I had known I wouldn't have cried that much
earlier. "I honestly don't know. I guess you just gotta use your head or take a
risk."
"Pero hindi naman trial and error ang pag-ibig, L."
I looked back at her, bewildered at her naiveté. "Believe me, Kim. It is."
My gods. Paano na lang kapag na in-love na siya for the very first time? Oo, cute
and little-miss-sunshine si Kim. But only few people know that she has this
annoying tendency to be stubborn. She's too black and white. She might be the
eldest among the three of us, but she's the naïve. Child-like na nga kung minsan.
Fuck it. Humanda sa akin ang unang lalaking magpapaiyak kay Kim. I'm scared for her
to fall for the wrong guy. She might not listen to reasons. Kasi ganun siya. If she
has too much faith in you, she won't see your faults.
She sees the good in everyone. Pero inaabuso siya nung mga taong yun kung minsan.
Kaya nakakatakot. Nakakatakot talaga na main-love
si Kim.
We both jumped on our seats when Jamie's bedroom door slammed open. She had this
panicky, wild look on her face as she stared at us before she ran towards the door.
Kim and I just looked at each other, confused.
"Anong nangyari dun?" she asked with wide eyes.
"Bopols ka ba?!" Jamie shouted.
I looked at Kim. "Uh-oh." That only means one thing...
Jamie suddenly entered the apartment with River-literally-in tow. His was still
wrapped with bandages, same with his legs. He's even wearing a cast on his left
arm! I noticed that he's pale and sweating like a pig.
Kim and I stood up to give them way. Good thing we haven't changed into our
pambahays yet. Kundi, pipilayan ko lalo tong si River.
Shit. Did he went up here alone? Nasa fourth floor kami at walang elevator dito!
Jamie dropped him on the couch and she slumped with his back on it. "Hindi ko alam
sa kanya!" Jamie answered while scratching her head in frustration. She helped him
sit up when he failed to do so. River smiled at her and she just glared at him.
"Bakit ka nandito?"
Damn. Jamie's pissed.
"I missed you."
I held back a groan. Typical Ongpauco response. There was a time when Kade would
tell me that just to be cute or just to be a pain in the ass. A pain on my ass.
Shit! Why is he here? He's just making me think of his brother!
I growled and walked out of the living room. I slammed my bedroom door and leaned
my back on it. I slid down until I was sitting down on my hunches.
Holy
tacos, this is fucking awful.
I miss him.
And I'm so fucking sorry about last night.
Gods. Nakita ko lang si River and I'm here, crying again because of his older
brother. River is a reminder na hinding-hindi mawawala sa buhay ko si Kade no
matter what. I know even if he's a douchebag, he's gonna win Jamie back.
Ongpaucos are persevering assholes. They get what they want because they work hard
for it. They have this weird unwavering patience and stubbornness. Mas nakita ko
iyon kay Kade but I'm starting to see it in River.
He fucking climbed up those four flights of steep steps! He did that just to see
Jamie. He did that just because he missed her. He did that just because. He's
supposed to be in his house resting. But he's here just because he wants to be here
with her.
Ganun si Kade sa akin and I just threw that away. For what?
He wasted all his efforts on me. Did I deserve that? Did I deserve his time and
effort? His love? His patience?
I don't know if what I did was for the best-fuck it, I'm doubting it now. But what
I know is that I'm miserable without him.
I wiped the tears away from my cheeks. Hindi ko na namalayang umiiyak na naman ako.
I'm a mess.
Without thinking, I pulled out my phone and sent him a text message.
I'm sorry, Kade.
It must've been three minutes before I looked back on my phone if there was a
reply. There wasn't. But I still saw something
that made my insides hurt.
Read 6:18 PM
***
'Kaya pala' was the first thing came to my mind.
It has been a week since I texted Kade and he just 'seenzoned' my apology text. I
wouldn't blame him. He must be tired of all these shit. Ako lang naman tong magulo
e.
Kaya pala.
I thought if I end everything with him somehow magiging okay paunti-unti ang lahat.
But I was wrong. For every single that passes, it seems to get harder to move on.
But apparently that sentiment was only for me.
Cascade Ongpauco was tagged in a post.
Sabrina Sarte feeling in-love with Cascade Ongpauco
I can't believe it's been a week! It feels like I've known you forever! I love you,
honey!
The post was accompanied by their selfie. She was giving him a big smooch on his
cheek while he's doing the 'half-smile, half-smirk'. He looked so... moved-on.
Kaya pala.
***
Thank gods for spare keys. If not for them hindi ako makakapasok sa magulong room
ni Jamie. I need her. I need her to come with me. Kailangan ko ng may kasama pauwi
mamaya. I'll probably too hammered to care to go home kung mag-isa lang ako.
"Wake up, Chewbacca!" I yelled at Jamie. She didn't budge when I shook her
shoulders wildly. She remained sleeping with her face down. She grabbed a pillow
and
covered her head with it.
Ayaw mo ha. I climbed up her bed and started jumping. "Wake up! We're gonna party!"
She threw her pillow at me when she rolled over. "Punyemas! Lumayas ka diyan!" she
yelled. "Nasaan si Kim? Bat di siya ang isama mo?"
I didn't answer her. I just dived on her chest. She whizzed so loud. I was about to
laugh but I found myself head-locked by her. Damn it.
"May concert sa church nila. Hindi makakasama sa akin," I answered when she let me
go. Remind me not to attack her. Kaya na niya pala gawin yung mga pinapanuod niya
sa UFC. I sighed and massaged my neck. "Sumama ka na. Please? I don't wanna go
there on my own!" I said, pouting. I need to convince her.
I need to drink. I need to dance. I need to not think. I need to forget that damned
picture. I need to forget the people who's in it!
I watched her tame her wild bed hair as she sat down properly. "Bakit hindi ka
magpasama sa mga 'party-animal-friends' mo? Or better yet, magpasundo ka kay MFG!"
she exclaimed.
My fake-pout disappeared when I heard her moniker for Kade. I looked away from her
and jumped out of her bed. "There's no MFG na," I said.
Jamie frowned. "Anong ibig mong sabihin? Hiwalay na kayo? Wait. Naging kayo ba?"
Yes. Naging kami. Yes, we broke up. And yes, it was my fault. But you don't need to
know that.
I shrugged nonchalantly. "There was never an us. It was just a fling, J," I
answered with an even voice. "He has a new girlfriend now," I said with a sigh.
Shit. That slipped
out.
Jamie's eyes widened. "Kailan pa?!"
I shook my head and smiled as I faced her. "Let's not talk about it na. Singles'
Party yung pupuntahan natin. Independence Day!" I managed to say without my voice
breaking. Smile, Louisse. Don't let her see it.
I practically see her brain working. But she kept her questions to herself and
smiled. She stood up. "Fine! Sasama na ako! Pero ikaw pumili ng susuotin!
I sighed in relief. Thank gods.
"Done!" I said as I ran away from her and went towards her closet.
***
"I don't care! I love it! I don't care!" Jamie and I shouted on the top of our
lungs as we danced in the middle of the dance floor. To say that we are having fun
is a bit of a stretch. We're not dancing because we wanted to have fun. We're doing
this because we wanted to forget our problems even just for a while.
"I don't care! I love it! I don't care!" I missed this. Walang iniisip. Sumasayaw
ka lang. Pikit-mata. Sumasabay sa beat. Nagpapakapagod. Because the last thing you
want to do when you get home is think that's why you dance until you drop and get
hammered.
Fuck. I love this. Getting lost in the darkness and the loud music. Why did I
stopped partying?
I opened my eyes and looked for Jamie. Shit. Where the hell is she? The last thing
I need right now is for her to get lost. I turned my back and looked for her. I
froze when I saw a familiar figure near at the bar.
My stomach dropped when I realized he's not alone.

They said when you finally see 'the one', the world will go into slow motion. But
they did not inform us that when you see your 'the one' with someone else... your
world literally stops.
He's the only one who's moving.
And you're there... stuck. Your body stiff. Your feet cemented on the floor. Your
eyes glued to them. Your heart shattered into a million pieces.
I don't know what's worse. That they're here in Anarchy, The Ledge's direct
competitor, just to flaunt their new relationship in my face or the mere fact that
they're flaunting their new relationship.
We didn't get to do that when we were together.
Sinong may kasalanan, Louisse?
It's obvious they're marking each others' territories. Why don't they just make-
out? Why don't they just bang each other? Why don't they just piss on each other
like dogs on the street?
Mas madali pang tignan yung if they're making out or fucking. It looks desperate e.
But this?! This hurts even more! Seeing him looking at her the way looked at me
before is way harder for me to take... to accept.
But I guess I have to suck it up. After all, this is my entire fault.
This is a bitter pill I need to swallow.
=================
Chapter 38: Woman-Up
Chapter 38
Woman-Up
Three Months Ago...
"What are you doing here, River?" I asked, my tone annoyed. But I'm not. I'm just
testing him, I know he won't budge. It's fun giving Ongpaucos a hard time. I guess
it's a bad habit to break.
He lifted the boxes of pizza and a tray of, I presume, lasagna and a plastic bag
filled with softdrinks in-can. I don't know how he brought them here with his
injured arm. "You know why I'm here," he said with a polite smile.
I rolled my eyes but I let him in anyway. "Jamie," I answered as I followed him to
the kitchen. Wow. Feel at home.
"Yep. You? What are you doing here?" he asked as he placed his 'pasalubongs' on our
dining table.
"I live here, dumbass," I dead-panned.
River looked up and smirked. "Nope. The answer is Kade."
My eyes widened, shocked. "Are you okay, River? Was that supposed to be a joke?" I
went closer to him and squinted at him. Don't tell me may binat to?
River chuckled. "It's the truth, though. Am I right?" he asked, his smirk still in
place.
Gods. I just found myself staring at his face. His resemblance with Kade is
uncanny. He just looked more mestizo than Kade. But their eyes? They have this
hooded light brown eyes. If they looked at you intensely it feels like their eyes
pierces you.
Bakit ba magkakamukha tong mga Ongpauco na to?
I shook my head. Wait. Baka may sinabi sa kanya si Kade. "Did he say something to
you? About the break-up?"
I asked. DIba he's here to win back Jamie? Why is he giving me the third-degree?
River shrugged and continued on preparing our food. "No. I just know it was bad
enough for you guys to be this miserable."
Oh.
Wait. Miserable? Wala talagang career sa pagiging comedian tong si River. Kade?
Miserable? He's far from it! He has a new girlfriend for fuck's sakes!
"We both know he's moving on quite well."
"So, what did you do?" he asked. I just stared at him. Ako talaga? Ako kaagad?
River looked up and just stared at me back. I sighed. Of course, he knows his
brother. Kade doesn't give up that easily. I was the only one who made him give up.
"I choked up on him," I admitted with a sigh.
River straightened up. "So we both choked up."
I dragged a chair and sat on it. "I was worse than you, though. I pushed him away
to the point he made me dump him. He got fed up with my shit and I let him go." I
watched River take a seat and leaned back on his chair. He's patiently waiting for
me to continue. "But you, you sponsored a moving-on trip for your ex. And now
you're here trying to win her back... I wish I had your courage."
River gave me a tight smile. "You have. You just need to want it enough to get him
back."
That easy? Well, yes. He's here. He's clearly saying the he wants Jamie enough
that's why he's trying to win her back.
"He's moved on," I reminded him. He has moved on with that pretty girl. Yes, I have
to admit she's pretty. I just wish she knows his worth. I just
wish hindi siya katulad ko.
"Trust me he's not. He has his reasons why he's dating Sabrina."
I closed my eyes. Whatever those reasons were, labas na ako dun. We're done. Ayoko
na siya guluhin. Mukhang okay na siya. I can't forget the way he looked at her.
It's impossible that he faked it for me para masaktan ako. He's not like that. He
probably didn't see me there.
I opened my eyes and shook my head. "You know what? Save it. Practice what you'll
say to Jamie later. She won't be happy to see you first thing in the morning," I
said, reminding him of his real reason why he's here. I know he's not here just to
give me a sermon.
River sighed."There was a time when my visits make her whole day."
I planted my arms on the dining table and leaned close to him. "Break her heart
again and I'll break your neck. Got it?" I whispered at him.
"Got it."
I stood up and was about to go back to the living area when River called me again.
I looked back and waited.
River was standing up and looked at me with a fierce expression. "You put my
brother through hell before. He's been through a lot of rejections. It's high time
he knew he's enough."
I swallowed the huge lump that formed in my throat. "It's not my job anymore,
River."
"Then, make it yours."
I just shook my head.
"I know my brother didn't fall for a push-over. You're no damsel-in-distress. Stop
being a puss-coward. Woman-up." He turned his back on me and went straight to the
fridge.
"It was nice talking
to you, River," I said. Really. It was the first time that I talked to him this
way. Puro small talks lang dati. And now... this.
He looked back at me and just shrugged. I guess he's back to being mute.
"I'll help you with, Jamie," I said as a thank you. He gave me a boyish grin.
No wonder Jamie fell for him. Man, those dimples...

***
"You ready?" I asked River. He was seated at the sofa while I'm at my bean bag. I
was munching on my pizza and coke on my other hand.
He gave me a single nod.
"DUDE! START NA NG GAME 6!" I yelled on the top of my lungs. River and I looked at
each other when we heard a loud band and her loud footsteps. I looked back at her
bedroom just in time when she opened it. She stopped on her tracks. Her eyes
staring daggers at River.
"Anong ginagawa niyan dito?"she asked, her tone annoyed.
"He brought three boxes of pizza and a pan of lasagna," I said with a shrug. Jamie
fixed her glare at me and I just showed her my pokerface.
Yes, babe. This is a set-up.
***
"Hoy, L! Saan ka pupunta? Ang aga yata ng gala mo!" Kim stopped me on my way out.
She's still in her sleep-wear. It looks like she just woke up.
"Bawal ma-late e," I said as I checked my bag and jean pockets. House keys, key-
fob, wallet, lipstick... They're all here.
Kim snickered. "Wow. Ikaw ba yan? Bagong buhay?"
I rolled my eyes at her. "Sige na. I need to go na," I answered,
obviously evading her questions. I can't just tell her about papa. Mapapatagal lang
because she'll ask too many questions. I need to go now because mama asked me to.
She stopped me again. "Wait! Saan ka nga pupunta?"
"May date ako," I lied without thinking.
Her eyes widened. "What?! Ganito kaaga?!" she sputtered.
I scratched my head. "Oo nga!" I went past her and was about to open the front door
when I remembered what happened here yesterday. I looked back and saw Kim, still
standing where I left her. "Anyway, nandyan pa pala si River! He stayed the night
here! Bye!"
I ran from fourth floor until I reached the parking lot area. While trying to
breathe normally, I checked my phone and decided to reply to my mother's text
earlier. Sobrang aga kasi. I had to move double-time because I read her text an
hour late. Patay ako.
From: Mama
Bubu, bantay ka muna kay papa mo.
May aayusin akong papers. I need to go now.
I'm on my way na po. I replied. But mama didn't text back. Baka nakatulog... or
maybe she's busy.
***
"Hey, mama! Sorry, if I'm la-oh. Hi, papa." I stopped short when I noticed mama's
already gone and papa is awake. His pale smiling face was the first thing that
caught my attention. Wala siyang pagbabago from the last time I saw him.
"Finally, naabutan din kita," he said with a grin. It made me smile seeing him
grinning.
"You're always sleeping e," I answered with a shrug.
Papa
chuckled weakly. "Ang sabihin mo, bihira ka lang dumalaw." His weak chuckle
combined what he said made me feel like shit, the guilt eating my insides slowly.
I smiled at him awkwardly. "That too."
He gestured for me to sit down at the chair next to his bed. "How are you, bu?"
I hesitated for a second but went ahead. Si papa lang yan. It's high time to talk
to him. "I'm... fine," I answered lamely.
"You're my daughter. I know when you're lying." He messed with my hair and I just
let him. May lakas na siya to that. That gave me little hope. "How are you?" he
asked when I got settled on the chair.
Kumusta na nga ba ako? Should I answer that question as truthful as I can? Or do I

need to bullshit my way out as usual?
You're no damsel-in-distress. Stop being a puss-coward. Woman-up.
I let out a sigh as I remember River's words yesterday. Of all people, it was River
who made the first push for me to wake-up... for me to make myself better. Simula
nung sinabi niya sa akin yung mga salitang yan, ayaw na nila maalis sa utak ko.
I always hear his voice. He was right. I am no damsel-in-distress. Why am I making

myself one? I need to stop being a pussy or a coward. I need to face my battles. I
need to solve my own problems. I need to toughen up. I need to woman up.
I looked at papa, he's patiently waiting for me to answer. "I'm trying to get
better," I answered honestly.
Papa sighed. "Maybe I could help you if you let me explain some things."
"I agree po. I think
it's time I hear you talk."
He didn't start talking right away. It was like he's choosing the right words to
say first. I practically see the wheels on his head turning. "When you were just
five years old, nagkahiwalay kami ng mama mo." My eyes snapped back to his.
"Nangibang bansa ako. I went to Switzerland. Dun ko nakilala si Jane."
There's a name na to his ex. I don't know how to feel about that.
"I have no means communication with your mother. We ended things in a bad way. You
suffered because of it," he continued, his voice hallow and his eyes had this sad,
far-away look.
I can't remember anything that he said. Katulad nung narinig ko sila ni mama about
a year ago. Wala din akong maalala nun, but it hurts just the same.
I pointed myself. "Me? How? I can't remember anything nga e."
Papa looked surprised. "Really? What was your first memory?" he asked.
First memory? Hmmm... Masaya yung first memory ko. It actually looked like it was
from a movie. "It was when we went to an amusement park? I was sitting on your
shoulders. Tapos you were holding hands with mama." I smiled at the memory. "I
remember you buying me me a balloon. Ayaw ni mama kasi baka mabitawan ko lang. But
you still bought it for me kaya tuwang-tuwa ako."
Papa chuckled weakly. "Yeah. I remember. You were five years old that time. It was
the last happy memory I had with the two of you bago ako umalis a week after that."
His smile disappeared. It must be a tough time for him reminiscing the past and
explaining them to me.
"Why
did you leave us, papa?"
"Because I was an idiot, anak." My eyebrows both shot up. I didn't expect that."I
was insecure. I thought I didn't deserve being with you and your mother that's why
I let you two go. I didn't know na mas pinalala ko lang yung sitwasyon." Well, that
sounded familiar. It was the exact same thing that I did to Kade.
"I was so in love with your mother. I still am." He smiled sadly. "But that time,
hindi ko alam kung paano ko kayo bubuhayin. I had no job, hindi ko kayo mapakain ng
maayos. Laki sa yaman ang mama mo, diba? Laki sa ginhawa. Hindi niya deserve
mabuhay ng mahirap just because she fell in love with me. Resposinibilidad kong
bigyan kayo ng mabuti at maginhawang buhay. I wasn't able to do that."
"That's why you left? To find a job abroad?" He nodded. "But it doesn't make any
sense. Yun din ang dahilan bakit kayo naghiwalay?" My mom is a tough cookie to
crack. I know she wouldn't give up just like that. Sinabi niya rin sa akin before
that it didn't matter na mahirap si papa nuon. She loved papa including his
imperfections.
"Your grandma doesn't like me. I know the moment I set my foot in that airplane,
hahanapan niya ng iba yung mama mo. Ibang lalaki na kaya kayong buhayin. Ibang
lalaki na deserve kayong dalawa."
"So you broke up with her because of your insecurities?"
"Yes. I told you, bubu. I was an idiot."
We remained quiet for a minute, both thinking. It was me who broke the ice when I
remembered 'Jane.' "But papa... You met Jane. Nagkaroon ka ng bagong pamilya with
her."
Papa
sighed deeply. "Yes, I met her. I was at my lowest when I met Jane."
"And that guy that I met here accidentally? Was he your son? Yung naabutan ko
dito?" I asked, remembering the teenage guy na parang younger version niya.
"Naikwento nga sakin yun ng mama mo. That was Alvin."
"So I have a younger brother..." I said, trailing off at the thought. I really do
have a half-brother... and he has a name!
"And a younger sister. Her name's Ivanna." And just like that... I became an older
sister of two teenagers.
"How old are they? How are they dealing with this? Since when did they know?" I
asked questions after questions without thinking. I just need to know the answers.
"16 and 15," he answered. "Alam nilang bumalik ako sa mama mo at tanggap nila yun.
Hindi rin maganda yung paghihiwalay namin ni Jane but we became friends over the
years, para sa mga bata."
I frowned. It appears that I'm the only one who doesn't know."So they knew from the
start? Ako lang ang walang alam?"
"Because we didn't know how to tell you, Louisse." I looked away from him but still
listened. "Hindi ko alam pero, anak, you have this wall-natakot kami ng mama mo na
i-shut down mo kaming dalawa. Nagiging closed-off ka kapag nasasaktan ka." I looked
back at him when I heard the same words Kade told me few weeks ago.
You're too closed-off. Your walls are too damn high, Salazar.
"Nung narinig mo kaming nag-uusap? We were discussing if it was the time to tell
you kasi malaki ka na and akala namin mas maiintindihan
mo na."
And I stormed off that night without hearing them out.
"I'm sorry..." I said to papa, tears starting to well up in my eyes. Ako lang
talaga nagpalaki ng problem naming tatlo.
"No. Kasalanan namin yun ng mama mo. May karapatan kang magalit." Papa reached for
my hand and I gave it. His hands were warm now. He squeezed mine and I squeezed his
back. "If we had told you sooner, hindi na sana lumaki pa ang problema. Mas
nasaktan ka kasi tumagal yung panahon na wala kang alam."
"What made you come back? Why did you leave your second family?"
"I can still remember that day, you know... nung naghiwalay kami ni Jane. Wala pa
akong sinasabi pero alam na niya. Sabi niya nakikita niya raw sa mga mata ko na
hindi ako masaya. Na nandoon lang ako kasi yun yung tama pero ang totoo, nasa
Manila ang puso ko. Naiwan sa una kong asawa at sa panganay kong anak."
I frowned. "She let you go just like that? Paano yung mga bata?"
"Palagi na kasi kaming nag-aaway nun. Hindi na rin siya masaya. Bilang lang sa
isang linggo yung mga araw na hindi kami nag-aaway." That must've been really hard
for them at sa mga anak nila. "Napag-desisyunan naming dalawa na mas makakabuti
para sa lahat, the kids included, that it was better for me to leave."
But how did they survive after he left them? He left two kids with her. Siguro
naman she has someone who helps her. "Hindi mo naman sila pinabayaan diba? I assume
nagpapadala ka ng pera? Like sustento?"
"Of course. I always go there with your mother kapag may free time ako."
Then
something clicked. "Oh. Yung vacations ko sa Tondo tuwing Summer." I squinted at

him. "Kaya niyo ko pinagbabakasyon nun dahil sa kanila? Para makadalaw ka?" Papa
nodded his head. "And then kaya niyo ako pinayagan mag-apartment when I got into
college... it was for them."
Papa nodded his head once again. "You figured it out already."
"Hindi mo ba tatanungin bakit ako tinanggap ulit ng mama mo?"
I shook my head. "I think it would be better if si mama ang kakausapin ko about
that." I wanna hear her side of the story. Maybe I'll ask for his again but now,
kay mama ko gusto marinig yung part na yun.
"The one thing I learned that time, nung tinanggap niya ako..." I looked back at
papa. He's not finished pa pala. "Hindi ako dapat nag give-up sa inyo in the first
place. It was too late when I realized you shouldn't give up on the people you
love. Mas okay na harapin yung paghihirap o mga problema nang magkasama kayo kaysa
magkalayo."
I swallowed the huge lump on my throat. Kade...
I squeezed my eyes shut and blocked any thoughts about him. Tapos na yun.
"So... Alvin at Ivanna, huh? Matitigas din ba ulo nila?" I asked, chaging the
subject.
"Nasa lahi na natin yun, 'nak." I grinned at him. Yeah, papa can be stubborn too.
Sa kanya nga namin nakuha yung stubbornness namin.
"They want to meet you," he said all of a sudden. Right now? Hindi pa ako ready. I
need ample time to prepare myself. It's one thing to learn about them, their names
and their ages... but it was another to meet them personally
after all these years.
"I don't think I'm ready yet... Isa-isa lang muna, please," I said, my voice
pleading.
Papa patted my head. "That's okay. I understand. Baby steps."
I sighed as I looked back at my father. "I'm sorry for ignoring you and mama for
months, papa."
"Wala na 'yun. Okay na tayo." He motioned for me to sit on his bed. "Come here. I
missed my bubu." I did what I was asked.
"Sali naman ako diyan."
Napatingin kami ni papa sa pinto. "Mama!" I exclaimed.
Mama went to papa's other side and the three of us hug. "Finally, the Salazars are
complete," papa mumbled.
***
I can't remember the last time I spent the weekend with my parents. Today, I was
reminded how clingy they could get. Nakadagdag pa siguro yung dahilan na we all
made-up three days ago. I have no complaints naman. In fact, I missed this. I
missed the feeling of being their baby girl.
"Wala kang gala ngayon? Date?" mama asked all of a sudden.
I looked at her. "Nagsasawa na kayo sakin?" I asked before going back to my phone.
I'm editing our photos. It's high time I post something on my social media
accounts, lalo na sa Instagram.
"It's not that. Nagtataka lang ako why you're still here."
I looked up again. I smiled cheekily at her. "Hindi ba pwedeng I just wanted to

spend time with my parents? I'm just making-up for the lost time."
Mama just gave me a dubious look. "Hmmm... Nasaan na nga pala si Cascade? Bakit
hindi mo pa pinapakilala sa
papa mo?"
And just like that, my smile disappeared. I can't believe siya pa magpapaalala sa
akin, of all people. "Mama..."
Her eyes squinted at me."I know that look. May ginawa ka."
I shook my head and looked back on my phone. "Wala na yun, ma."
"Let me guess, you pushed him away."
I stopped what I was doing and gaped at her. "What? Ako kaagad may kasalanan?" I
asked, annoyed.
Her eyes softened. "I saw how that boy looked at you. I saw how he took care of you
when you saw Alvin for the first time." Mama tucked a stray hair to the back of my
ear. "That boy loves you."
"Not anymore, he's not."
"I know what you're capable of, bu. If you can do it to us, you parents... I know
you can do it to your 'friend' too."
"Mama..." I trailed off. I don't know what to say. I know no matter what they say,
that they forget what I did, alam kong bullshit lang yun. Nobody forget things like
that.
"Speaking of friend. Kumusta na sina Jamie at Kim?" she asked, changing the
subject.
Shit. Si Jamie. I haven't seen her since she left with River!
"Holy tacos! Buti pinaalala mo, mama! Hindi ko pa nakakausap si Jamie. She went
with her ex-boyfriend/manliligaw in his mother's house. Hindi umuwi kagabi. I need
to call her."
I jumped out of my seat and dialed Jamie's mobile number.
Calling Jamie Navarro...
It took five rings before Jamie answered. "Hello, Cookie Monster?"
Wait... shit. There are only two kids who call me 'Cookie Monster' and from the
small, baby-like voice, I know this is Ocean Ongpauco, Kade's youngest sister.
"Ozi? Why are you answering Jamie's phone?"
"I miss you, Achi Louisse! When are you gonna play with us again?" My hearts ached
at her sweet, hopeful voice. I don't want to disappoint the kid with my answer but
I just can't lie to her.
"I missed you, too!" I admitted. I took a deep breath before telling her that I
can't go play date with them anymore. "I'm sorry, but I don't think we can play
again."
"That's what Ahia said earlier... But we wanna play with you!"
Ahia. Si Kade na naman. I shook my head. "If only I could, Ozi. But I'm not allowed
to play with you anymore."
"Why aren't you allowed? Did you fight with Ahia? Don't you like him anymore? Don't
you like us?" Her words broke my heart. Who in their right minds wouldn't like
those two kids?
I sighed. "You're too young to understand, Ozi."
"But I just wanna play with you!" Ozi whined. I can practically see her pout and
her big, fat tears.
"Hey, baby! Don't cry!" I said, panicking. "Fine! I'll talk to your ahias and ask
them if we could play, okay? Just stop crying."
"Really?" she asked, her voice hopeful.
"Yes, really." I just dug my own grave. Maybe I'll just ask River or Lake.
Ozi squealed from the other line as she cheers. "Yay! Bay and I will be good girls!
You'll like us again!"
"Ozi..." I trailed off.
"Bye, Cookie Monster! We love you, achi!" And then she hung up.
Good gods, these Ongpaucos just won't quit.
=================
Chapter 39: Relapse
Chapter 39
Relapse
A Month Ago...
"This is a terrible idea, Lake," I growled at him through the phone. I've been
talking to him for minutes and he won't listen to me! I kept on repeating those
words to him but it's useless!
Lake sighed. "You can't not be there, Louisse."
"River and I aren't close!" I exclaimed. He wouldn't mind if I won't go because

we're not that close. We had a talk once but we're not exactly chummy.
"You can't ditch Kim. She's excited to go." Gods. He's bringing out the big guns.
He's guilt-tripping me!
"Lake, it's been two months since the last time I've seen him. I don't think it's a
good idea to go to your family gathering and bump into them."
Two months na kaming hindi nagkikita ni Kade. I went off the radar. I didn't go to
any social activities. I knew there was a chance that I'll see them together.
Ayokong saktan ang sarili ko. I ignored party invites. I ignored phone calls and
text messages from my old friends. Minsan ko na nga lang din makita si Kim and
Jamie. They're busy with their own lives, too.
I went back into reading. My TBR list and my credit card has a huge dent now. When
I'm not reading in my room, I would watch American TV shows in the living room.
Nakailang shows and seasons na ba ako? I basically got lost in the fantasy world of
books, TV shows and movies. I re-read HP and PJO. I got obsessed with Artemis Fowl
series and Maximum Ride series. And oh my gods, I just discovered Abbi Glines!
That's
how I spent the past two-months.
Between watching TV shows and reading, you will also find me in the hospital taking
care of my papa.
I busied myself. I didn't dwell on things na alam kong makakasakit sa akin. I'm
trying not to reminisce. I almost always block -out everything related to him. I
don't if that's healthy but for me it kind of works. I'm trying to move-on on my
own pace.
"I'm telling you, Lake. This is a terrible idea," I said, my tone serious.
"Anong terrible idea?" Kim suddenly appeared out of thin air and asked.
I heard Lake chuckled from the other line. I know he knows I won't tell Kim the
real reason why I don't wanna go. "You're going. Bye." Wow. He had the gall to hang
up on me?
I shook my head and slid my phone into my purse. "Wala. Lakas lang ng trip ni
Lake." I lied. I can't tell her the truth for obvious reasons. "You ready?" I
asked, ready to go.
Kim showed me her huge, goofy grin. "Super! Lika na! Para makarating tayo ng maaga
at para hindi tayo maabutan ni Jamie."
That was the plan... Actually, that was Lake's plan. He texted us last night
regarding River's birthday celebration today. He invited us to go. Of course, I
declined. But he insisted, he won't accept 'no' as an answer daw. I called him
earlier to bail out on the last minute. Yes, it was shitty. But what was I suppose
to do? Go there and mingle with the Ongpauco clan? Shit. I'm sure Kade and his new
girl, Sabrina, is there too.
But no matter what I say, Lake would reject it. And then, he guilt-tripped me
using Kim. If I know, he just wanted her to go. Hindi niya lang masundo because
he's busy with the preparation. Apparently, he's close with River's mom and she
asked for his help.
I heaved a huge deep sigh. I'm just gonna avoid being close to them and ignore them
for the whole night.
***
"Magugustuhan kaya ni River itong regalo natin?" Kim asked as she placed our gift
in her lap. "Hindi ba masyadong simple?"
I looked at her briefly then turned my eyes back in the road. "He will appreciate
anything Jamie-related," I answered with a shrug. He's head-over-heels in-love with
Jamie. Si Jamie na lang ang hindi nakakaalam and mas okay nay un. She should know
about it on her own.
"True," I heard Kim said.
Dahil last minute nag-send ng invites si Lake through group message, Kim and I
panicked last night. We came to a decision to gift him a... picture frame. We
printed a collage of their photos that we stolen on their Instagram accounts.
"Favorite ko talagang picture nilang dalawa yung sa archway ng Disney Land.Yung

hitsura nila dun, in love na in love e."
I smiled as the image flashed in my mind. They looked cute in that picture nga.
"Good thing yun yung pinili nating background," I said as I looked at my phone on
the dashboard. Malapit na kami sa bahay nila. We're only a block away.
"Sana kiligin silang dalawa," Kim said with a dreamy sigh. "Kailan kaya ako
magkaka-boyfriend?"
That is so random.
I almost jumped
when Kim squealed. "Wow! Yaan na ba yung bahay nila?"
I looked on my phone again. Yep. We're here. "According to Waze, yes."
After parking my mini coop, we took photos of the first place for our social media
accounts. Instagram-worthy itong bahay nila River sa Tagaytay e. When we finished
taking pictures, Kim and I walked towards the huge front door na nakasara.
"Oh my god. Ang ganda ng bahay nila! Mansyon na ata to!" Kim said in awe. I am in
awe too. Ang ganda talaga ng bahay nila e. It looked so cozy kahit ang laki-laki.
Bahay-bakasyunan vibes.
I looked around and my eyes caught something. Nandito na yung Ford F-150 ni Kade.
He's here. They're here. "Nakakahiyang pumasok! Late na ba tayo?" Kim said but I
ignored her.
"Huy, L! Ano na? Bakit tulala ka na diyan?" K said as she clapped her hands in
front of my face.
Shiz, Louisse. Get a grip. Stop thinking about them. But fuck, I'm going to see
them again today. Am I ready for that?
"Parang ayoko na tumuloy," I said as I took a step back.
Kim immediately grabbed my arm and stopped me. "HA?! Bakit?!"
Shit. I can't tell her it's because of Kade! I can't tell her I don't want to see
him with his new girlfriend.
I sighed and then squared my shoulders. "Ugh. Wala. Don't mind me." I stood tall
and started walking towards the Ongpauco's huge front door. "C'mon, let's get this
shit over with."
Loud squeals immediately welcomed us when we walked inside their house. Two small
bodies slammed against mine and four arms wrapped around me.
"Cookie
Monster!" Ozi squealed as she squeezed the ever loving shit of my legs.
Bay looked up from me and grinned. "Achi Louisse!"
"Bay! Ocean!" I exclaimed as I wrapped my arms around the two kids. I can't believe
it. They really do miss me! It made my heart ache and soar at the same time. Iba
talaga ang mga kiddos.
"We missed you, achi!" Bay said before hugging me again.
"Kim! Louisse! I'm glad you made it, guys!" I looked up and saw Lake coming over
us. "Tara, let's eat appetizers muna while we wait for River and Jamie."
"Can we play with Achi Louisse, ahia?" Ozi asked Lake as we followed him. Where is
he taking us? Sa kitchen? Dining room? Or sa living room?
Lake looked over his shoulder and gave Ozi a patient smile. "Later. Let your achi
eat first." He looked at Kim. "By the way, Kim, mga kapatid yan ni Kade. Si Bay and
Ocean." They made the necessary introductions before we sat on the dining table.
May mga bagong handa na halatang kakalapag lang sa table. Umuusok pa e.
Lake left us for a while. Naiwan sa amin ang dalawang bata. They ate the newly
served canapés.
Kim leaned closer to me and whispered. "Paano mo pala nakilala yung mga bata?
Parang close na close na kayo ha?"
Shit. I have to lie again. Or not. Pwede namang magsabi ako ng half-truth. "Uhhh...
Sa condo ni Kade. Remember, we were study buddies before?" I looked away from her
and started putting canapés on my plate.
"Talaga? Parang hindi ko alam yun."
I waved my hand dismissively. "Ahh. Wala na yun.
It's in the past."
"Achi! Let's play later ha?" I looked at Ozi and smiled.
"Let's play in our room! We have a princess tent there!" Bay suggested.
"Sure. If your ahia's don't mind," I conceded.
Ozi gave me a goofy grin. "They won't!"
"Can I bring Kim with me?" I pointed at Kim and asked the kids. She seemed out-of-
place! Kailangang isali sa usapan! "The more the merrier!" I added for good
measure.
Ozi frowned in confusion. Ang cute! "What's that mean?" she asked innocently.
"It'll be more fun if there are more people we could play with," I explained with a
smile.
She nodded her head. "Okay!"
"Ozi! Ozi! Look! Ahia's new girlfriend!" Bay hissed at Ozi na katabi ko lang. I
stopped myself from looking at the direction the kids were looking.
Ozi made a barfing sound. "Eew! Cookie Monster is so much prettier!"
"Sino si Cookie Monster? Kanina pa nila sinasabi yun," Kim whispered in my ear
again.
"It's Ach-"
"Achoo!" I interrupted Bay's big mouth with a fake sneeze. "Shit. Uhm, sisipunin pa
ata ako," I said, my hand covering my nose. Hmm... That could be a good opening to
suggest na tumakas na kami. "Uwi na tayo?" I asked Kim with a hopeful expression.
"Hala! Agad-agad? We just got here!"
I rolled my eyes. Asa ka pa, Louisse. "Fine! Pero we're gonna go home early, okay?"
Before Kim could respond, we heard a loud clap and Lake's booming voice. "They're
here, everyone! Let's all keep quiet!" We all stood
up from our seats and ran towards the living room. Shit. Ang dami pala talagang tao
dito. It looked like there's approximately 100 people here.
The door opened and we saw Jamie guiding River carefully towards us. River's arm
was draped on her shoulder. Tsansing.
"Damn it, baby. We should've just stayed in your bed," River said loudly. Siguro
para inisin si Jamie.
Jamie's face reddened and she looked shocked. I watched her hissed at him and he
just chuckled at her. Ang cute nila. Nakakainis!
Jamie untied the River's blindfold. We waited for him to open his eyes before we
greeted him. "Happy birthday, River!" we all yelled.
"Oh, wow," River said, pleasantly surprised. He looked at his side and smiled at
Jamie. "Thank you," he said to her before kissing her in the side of her head.
It felt like it was a private moment for them kahit na sobrang daming tao dito. I
looked away from them. But my eyes were caught by someone.
Not just someone. It was Kade.
I looked away almost immediately. But it went to Jamie's arch-rival. What the hell
is she doing here?
"Anong problema?" Jamie asked the moment she approached us.
"Nandito yung bagong girlfriend ni Kade. Magkasama sila," Kim said before I could
respond. WHAT THE HELL?! She knows?!
I looked at Kim with wide eyes but she was looking at Jamie. "Ewan ko ba diyan kung
bakit. Parang kanina niya pang gustong umuwi simula nang dumating sila."
Oh, gods. Good gods.

I shook my head. This is not about me. I need to give
Jamie a heads up. "Ano ba, K? May mas importante pa dun!" I told her before looking
at Jamie. "Heads up, the bitch is here."
Still smiling, Jamie asked, "Girlfriend ni Kade?" What the heck? No!
I shook my head once again. "No! Jam Ilano is here!"
The smile in Jamie's lips wavered until it disappeared. "Invited pa rin pala yung
bitch na yun," she said before sighing. Disappointment evident in her face.
"Yeah. Are you okay?" I asked. That news was seriously a downer. But she had to
know.
Jamie smiled and stood straight. "I will be. Bakit naman hindi?" she asked, her
tone challenging.
We all jumped when Lake suddenly appeared to my left. "Hey, weirdos. C'mon let's
eat!"
***
I need a glass of champagne. No, I need two. After playing with those two... no,
three, kasama si Kim, kailangan ko talagang uminom. Goodness, I think Ozi broke my
back. I shouldn't have agreed being her horse. Buti na lang talaga they gave me a
reprieve and I got the chance to sneak out and get a drink.
I walked straight to the table where the drinks were placed. Good thing there's one
champagne glass pa. I reached for it and -
"Oh," I said in surprise when a hand grabbed mine that was holding the glass.
Saktong naunahan ko siya sa last champagne glass that was placed on the table.
"Louisse." I stilled when I heard the man's familiar voice.
Fuck. He called me 'Louisse.' He rarely calls me by my name. He does that when he's
annoyed or mad at me. What does he feel right now? Annoyed
dahil nandito ako?
I looked up and stifled my gasp. "Cascade," I said to him, my voice calm. Gods.
Ngayon ko na lang uli nasabi ang buong pangalan niya.
And it fucking hurts doing so.
We stared for almost a minute. No one dared to talk. No one dared to look away. No
one dared to make a move.
"Honey! What's the hold up? Where's my drink?" And just like that, the spell was
broken.
I looked away from him and pulled the champagne glass. I went to his new girlfriend
and handed it to her.
"Here. It's all yours." He's all yours.
"Excuse me," I smiled at her as I leave.
I took deep breaths as I went back to Kim and the kids. Damn it. Sabrina Sarte is
prettier up close. She has a fair-complexion and flawless skin. She has long brown
hair na mukhang sobrang smooth. She has this angelic face and gods, she's boobsie.
I can't help but feel insecure. It's so silly.
I'm moving on, right? Why does it feel like this? Bakit parang nawala lahat ng
ginawa ko? All the progress I thought I achieved over those two months? Just
hearing my name on his lips, all my efforts were put into waste.
I'm back to square one.
"Oh, anong nangyari?" Kim asked when I barged into the room. I must've looked
horrible. I don't know. I can't feel anything. I'm too numb to care.
"We need to go now," I said as I reached for my purse on Bay's bedside drawer.
"Huh? Nag-eenjoy pa ko!" Kim whined. Nahawa na ata sa mga bata.
I took a deep breath and nodded. Kung ayaw
niya pang umalis, I can go on my own. "Fine, you stay. Magpahatid ka kay Lake or
sumabay ka kay Jamie." I turned my back on her and was about to leave.
"Wait, Louisse!"
I looked over my shoulder. "Sorry, K. It's a family emergency," I lied. I need to

lie so I could leave immediately.
Kim looked at me, her eyes worried. Shit. She knows something's up. "Mag-ingat ka
sa daan. Text mo ko ha?"
***
I spent the next two days in the hospital. If I wasn't sleeping there, I was
watching basketball game replays with my father. I'd do anything just to forget
that mini-incident in Tagaytay.
My gods, I must've looked pathetic when I walked out.

Shit. Don't even think about. Over-thinking is fucking bad for you, Louisse.
I looked at my reflection in the mirror. It doesn't look like na nag-effort ako,

right? The last thing I need is to give them the satisfaction na nag-ayos ako ng
sobra or that I looked ugly next to-Ugh. Stop, Louisse.
I smoothed down my blue sleved-dress. I paired it up with my trusty brown suede

boots. Simple lang but I know I look hot. I let my hair down. I know Kade likes it
like th-Gods. Stop thinking about him!
"Nakakapagod!" Kim said with a sigh.
I looked over my shoulder and watch Kim lie down on her bed. "You're not going with
us?" I asked when I noticed she's already wearing her jammies.
"Tinatamad ako. Tsaka napagod ako sa festival kanina," she grumbled.
I rolled my eyes. Typical
Kim. She has a tendency to be a kill-joy sometimes. "Three days and two nights lang
tayo dito. Let's make the most out of it, Kim."
That made her think. "Maaga naman tayo makakauwi no?" she asked as she sat up.
I nodded. "Yeah, yeah. Bilisan mo na kumilos."
Kim huffed but jumped out of her bed. I sat down on my own bed waited for her to
get ready. Waiting for Kim will gonna take a while. I can't say I blame her.
Nakakatamad umalis especially now that we know what Sabrina is capable of. Gods,
that girl s such a bitch.
If we didn't leave them earlier, we wouldn't have enjoyed the Kadayawan Festival.
We almost got into a fight with the locals just because of her big mouth and her
attitude. What a pain in the ass. But like I said earlier, we only have three days
and two nights here. We shouldn't let that bitch spoil our vacation.
Nakakahiya naman sa mother ni River if we didn't make the most out of this trip.
The next time I see her, I'm gonna thank her for this unexpected trip. Nadamay pa
kami nina Kim.
When they told me about it, I couldn't believe it at first. Sponsored trip? Gaano
ba sila kayaman? They must be really rich to sponsor trips here and there. Pero
syempre, natuwa na rin ako and got excited. It's free! Kayak o naman iwasan si
Kade. I can just go with Jamie and Kim anywhere and dun siya kay Lake.
But of course, he had to bring that bitch of a girlfriend he has.
"Are you kidding me?" I remembered it was Jamie who screeched first when she saw
them at the airport's domestic terminal. We all
stopped dead on our tracks when those two faced us.
In that moment, I just know that this trip will be a disaster. Masakit na nung
nakita ko sila sa party together. How much more now that we're on the same trip out
of town?
I stood up straighter and cleared my face with any emotion. Nakalamang na siya. I
won't let him have the satisfaction in knowing that he had rattled me once again
with his girlfriend's presence.
"Bro, a heads up would've been nice," Lake said to Kade when they met us.
"What do you expect? She's my girlfriend. Of course, she's going with us," Kade
said with a shrug. I can tell he's irritated but he's hiding it behind his smirk.
"Would it kill you to pick up your phone and call me?" Lake asked once again, his
tone dripping of sarcasm.
Sabrina huffed. "What's the big deal ba?" she whined before looking back at Kade.
"Aren't you gonna introduce me, honey?"
Their term of endearment really baffles me.
Kade looked back at her and grinned. May nakakatuwa ba sa sinabi niya?
He looked back at us. "River, Lake, Jamie, Kim and Louisse..." His eyes found mine
and I stared back at him."Meet my girlfriend, Sabrina Sarte." He returned his gaze
to Sabrina. "Rina, meet River and Lake. They're my cousins. Jamie, Kim and Louisse
are my... friends."
Wow. Friends? Since when did we become friends? Akala niya ba that incident two
days ago was our reconciliation? Good gods, he's delusional.
"Friends?" I snorted all of a sudden. I just can't take this bullshit
anymore. "The last time we talked I thought you hated me. We're still friends pa
pala," Kade just stared at me. But I can tell by the way his jaw clenched that he's
pissed. I looked at his girlfriend and saw how she eyed me from head to toe. "It
was nice to meet you," I said with a saccharine smile.
She rolled her eyes and looked back at Kade. I was dismissed. "Honey, let's go
check in na," she said before dragging Kade with her. I watched them together.
They're not holding hands but her arm is linked to his. He's also carrying her big
luggage.
It was pathetic. But it could be me just being bitter to them.
He never did that to me. Pero hindi rin. I'm not an invalid naman. Why would I let
him carry my things kung kaya ko naman buhatin?
"What just happened?" Kim asked in confusion.
I looked at them and saw Jamie grinning. "Sumunod na tayo sa kanila! Baka masarahan
pa tayo! Boarding na!"
***
I was right. It took Kim an hour to get ready. Na-late kami sa usapan and this time
it wasn't my fault. But you can't feel it now because she's now talking to Lake
animatedly. Kade and Sabrina are talking in their side. Jamie and River is in the
dancefloor being all lovey-dovey and shit.
And I'm here, all alone in my own corner.
Shiz. I didn't expect this to happen. Apparently, I am the seventh wheel in this
trip pala. Parang ako pa yung hindi invited.
You don't feel anything, L. You're numb. You will be numb all night kung hindi mo
sila titignan.
You can do it. You're good at denying things. You're good at blocking out feelings
and thoughts.
Shit. I really suck at pep-talks when it comes to myself.
"Ugh! PDA much?" I heard Sabrina whined with her irriating high-pitched voice. How
can Kade tolerate her?
Natiis nga niya kaartehan mo, boses pa kaya ni Sabrina?
Shut up, brain.
I looked at her. It was River and Jamie who she's calling out. They just ignored
her miserable attempt to rile them up.
"Are you gonna drink that?" This time, it was Kim she's baiting.
Shit. No. Not Kim.
"Hindi ako mahilig uminom e," Kim answered politely.
Sabrina rolled her eyes. "It shows. You don't belong here."
What the fuck did she just say? Kim doesn't belong here? Sino kayang hindi invited
at pinagsiksikan ang sarili niya dito? She's delusional!
I was about to open my mouth to rip her a new one when Lake did it first. "Mind
your own fucking business," he sneered.
"Watch your fucking mouth, Lake," Kade warned.
He's siding with that inconsiderate bitch?
"Control your bitch," Lake countered before dragging Kim away.Ohhh, make sure to
put a cold compress to that burn.
Thank gods Lake dragged Kim out of here.
"You guys are so ma-drama," Sabrina scoffed.
I just shook my head in disgust. I grabbed my beer bottle and took a sip on it.
Chill ka lang, Louisse. Indifference is the key to success.
"Hey, Louisse. Why are you alone there?"
Good gods. She's not finished? Ako naman?
I placed the beer bottle on the table and just shrugged. She can't rile me up. She
won't see any emotion from my face. Magsawa siya sa resting bitch face ko.
"Wow. I'm surprised. I heard this is your kind of scene," she said. She looked
amazed.
I looked at her. Her snooty aura really irritates the shit out of me. "What do you
mean?" I can't help but ask.
She smiled triumphantly. Fuck. I took her bait. "I'm just surprised, really. I
heard kasi na you fuck around a lot."
"Sabrina!" Kade said in shock.
What? I fuck around a lot? Me? I fuck around a lot? Where did she get that? Si Kade
nga-Damn it. Is he that mad at me? Sisiraan niya ako pati sa girlfriend niya?
The possibility of Kade saying bad things about me made me feel cold. Everything
becomes a blur to me in that minute. I tuned out their words. I didn't saw the
fight between Sabrina and Jamie. My eyes were just zeroed in at Kade. He was
horrified... almost apologetic.
No.
I looked away from him and everything became clear to me.
"Baby, stop. Let's just go," I heard River said to Jamie.
"No! Kailangan may gumising sa kahibangan nitong babaeng to! I'm not just gonna
stand here and let her humiliate my friends!" Jamie shouted. The people around us
watched at the scene we all made. I should stop this. Baka makulong pa si Jamie
dito sa Davao. I won't let that happen just because Sabrina insulted me.
"Don't worry, J. I was just leaving," I said, standing up.
Her head whipped
to my direction. "Wait! Saan ka pupunta?" she sputtered.
"I'm just gonna go and do what I do best, fucking," I said to her in a cool tone. I
didn't bother looking back at Kade. I don't need to see him and his fucking awful
bitch.
"See? She admitted it naman!" I heard her exclaimed triumphantly.
Fuck you, gago.
***
I didn't go to our room, I know I'm just going to cry there. So instead, I looked
for Lake and Kim. They were seated at the bar, talking. Parang walang nangyari.
Thank gods Kim has Lake.
"Hey, Louisse! Let's drink! Until 12am lang drinks dito."
From what happened earlier, there's no chance in hell I'll decline. So I did drink.
I let myself get smashed. I just wanna feel numb. I just wanna feel empty.
I wanna feel...
Nothing.
Pero kahit anong pilit ko. Ang sakit-sakit... not just my heart. But it felt like
even my insides...my bones are aching. My whole body hurts.
"L, sunud-sunod yung inom mo diyan! Tama na!" K admonished as she tried to take
away the beer bottle from my grip. I moved it away from her.
I'm already tipsy but this isn't enough pa.
"Did something happen ba, L? Inaway ka din ni Sabrina?" Lake asked.
I held a finger in his face. "Shh. Stop saying the bitch's name."
Lake shook his head, grinning. "L, don't say bad words in front of the kid," Lake
said, pointing at Kim.
I giggled. He's so damn funny.
"Ewan ko sa inyo!" Kim huffed. "Mag-CR lang
ako," And off she went.
Shit. They're too cute! They're both goofballs. "You two are so bagay," I told Lake
as I watched him look at Kim's back. "Do you like my friend?" I asked as I squinted
at him.
He looked back at me and grinned. "Yes."
"What are you waiting for? Make a move!" I drunkenly urged him.
Lake scratched his head and sighed. "I'm always making a move, L. But she's too
innocent to recognize it."
I giggled. Shit. I don't giggle. I must be drunk na talaga. "Just ask her straight.
Ligawan mo na," I said. Wow. I'm capable of giving advises pa pala.
"That's the plan," he said with a boyish grin.
We both looked at his phone. It lit up and rang. "Oh, wait. River's calling. Excuse
me." I just nodded and let him go. Bakit kaya tumatawag si River sa kanya?
"Ma'am, mag-close na po ang bar in 10 minutes."
Napatingin ako sa bartender. "Oh, okay." He's asking me to leave na. Edi, okay.
I jumped out of my seat and starded to leave. "Wait, ma'am! Yung bayad niyo!"
I almost fell down when I bumped into a solid wall of muscles. I looked up and saw
Kade looking at the bar. "I got it," he said to the bartender before giving him
money. Hindi ko nakita how much.
"Kade?" I pushed him back slightly. His hands didn't leave my shoulders. "What are
you doing here?" I asked him. Shit. Don't tell me, nandito pa si Sabrina? "Where's
your girlfriend?" I looked over his shoulder and saw no one.
He didn't answer me. He made me turn and guided me out of the club. "C'mon.
You're drunk," he said before dragging me out of the roofdeck.
His hand grabbed my arm. I tried to pull away from him but his grip wouldn't budge.
"Let go of me. I can handle myself," I slurred. Fuck. Tipsy lang ako kanina ha?
"Damn it, Salazar." He put me in his shoulder and continued to walk. I didn't fight
him. I'm too dizzy to fight .In fact, my head is pounding.
"Oh. We're back to that again? Are you tired to be called 'honey?'" I grumbled on
his back.
He just ignored me. Even when we got to the elevator, he didn't put me down. "Ano
ba? Put me down, you asshole!"
Because of my screams, yung mga kasama namin sa elevator ay lumabas. Nice. Instead
of helping me, they left. What the hell, right?
Kade sighed before he put me down, my body sliding against his. Wait. Is that a
hard on? "What floor are you on?" he asked.
I moved away from him and leaned back on the wall. "What floor are you and your
girlfriend on?" I shot back. Why would I answer that? Kaya ko pumunta there on my
own. I don't need his help.
"Damn it, just answer my question." He had the gall to talk to me like that? No one
asked him to go with me!
I shook my head. "No! Go back to your bat-shit crazy girlfriend! She might say
something stupid again. I can't promise you I won't punch her this time," I shouted
at him, reminding him of his crazy girlfriend.
"She's in her room."
I scoffed. "Her room? Oh, please. Just say it. I know you're in the same room.
She's probably there, willing and naked, waiting
for you to bang her brains out."
Kade's jaw clenched. He's clearly irritated now. I don't fucking care. "Shut it."
Shut it? Bakit? Because I'm right? Tama siguro ako sa iniisip ko sa kanila. They
must've fucked each other earlier. Speaking of fucking...
I moved closer to him and gave him a glare. "Where did she get that shit about me
fucking around? Sa'yo? Did you talk shit about me with your new girlfriend?" I
asked, fuming with new found rage.
Kade looked up, a sign of frustration. "No."
I pointed him with my index finger then poked him on his chest. "C'mon! Don't lie
to me! I don't even know her and yet she has this stupid idea in her bony head that
I'm a slut!"
Kade looked offended. "I didn't talk shit about you, okay? I will never do that to
you."
I laughed at his face. Nakalimutan niya na ba yung nangyari sa apartment? "You

talked shit about me before! You forgot na? DIba you said I'm more trouble than my
worth?" Oh, wait no. He wasn't wrong about that. He's too invested in me but I'm
just a pain in his ass. Na-realize niya na I'm not worth it. "Although, alam ko
naman na what you said that time was true."
Kade grabbed my hand and pulled it down. "I didn't mean it."
"Oh, but you did, asshole!" I scoffed. Ano tingin niya sa akin? Stupid?
Kade sighed. "Let's just talk in the morning, okay?" He looked exhausted.
Just like that? He doesn't want to talk now? Oh, not so fast. Kung nilabas niya
yung sama ng loob niya two months ago, I'm gonna tell him mine
now!
I pulled my hand away from him and poked him on his chest. "No! Isa ka pa! You of
all people knew I'm not a slut! You were my fucking first!"
Kade shook his head. "I didn't expect she's gonna act like that!"
I rolled my eyes and moved away from him. "Whatever. You probably enjoyed watching
her humiliate me."
Kade looked at me, his face frowning. "I didn't, okay? What she did was wrong. She
knows what she did to you didn't seat well with me. I actually just had a fight
with her and it didn't end well."
"Why? You made her dump you, too?" I said in a mocking tone. Kade's eyes hardened.
"What did you see in her, anyway? Yun yung pinalit mo sakin? After you criticized
me with the way I treated you, sa kanya ka lang din pala babagsak?" I took a step
closer, my eyes staring right through him. "What the heck? I let you go because I
know you didn't deserve someone like me! I was hoping you picked someone who's
gonna treat you better than I did." I poked his chest once again, my eyes started
to sting. "What kind of standards do you have? You always fall for the worst kind
of girl-me included."
"I was the one who asked for a cool off," Kade said, his voice dropped low. His
hands grabbed mine.
"Wala na kayo?" I asked in confusion.
Kade pulled me close to him. Oh my gods. What the hell is going on? "Louisse, I am
forced to be with her. You have to know I haven't moved on from you."
And just like that, my heart broke again. Putang ina. Ang sakit.
I took a step back. "Forced?
I'm not stupid, Cascade. I saw the way you looked at her in Anarchy!"
"Because I know you were looking at us!" he exploded.
I gaped at him. "So, you did that just to hurt me? What kind of a person does
that?!" I yelled at him, hurt and furious.
"A person who got hurt! A person who's still hurting!" Kade shouted back.
I pushed his chest with both hands. "But I didn't do it to you, Cascade. I'm
hurting but I didn't do that to you!"
"Shut up, Salazar," he growled his warning.
I lifted my chin up in defiance. "Make me," I sneered.
Kade grabbed my face with both hands and his lips crushed mind. My eyes
automatically closed, my hands grabbed his arms and my lips responded to his deep,
drugging kiss. Kade pushed me against the wall with his body. I didn't mind, the
heat of his body seeped through my clothes making my body shiver. I'm getting hot
and weak at the same time.
His lips trailed on my jaw until it reached my neck. I moaned when his hand raked
through my hair and grabbed it hard. I gasped and opened my eyes. I saw his free
hand pushing the 9th floor button.
"Where are we going?" I rasped.
"In my room," Kade answered. His lips latched against my pulse and he sucked it
hard. I groaned when he soothed the sting with his tongue.
"She's not really there?"
Kade pulled away but pressed his forehead against mine. "I moved her in a different
room," he answered before claiming my lips once again.
"Different floor?" I asked between kisses.
He pulled
my lower lip with his teeth. "Yes, babe."
"Good," I moaned.
***
I didn't know how we got into his room. All I know is that we were overcome with
our hunger and thirst for each other. We left a trail of our clothes on his hotel
room floor. We were only in our underwear when we reached his bed.
I groaned when I felt the cool sheets on my back. Kade gently parted my thigh as he
crawled on top of me. I wrapped my legs around his hips and tugged his head down
close to mine."
"Fuck it, I missed you," he whispered before kissing me on the tip of my nose.
I felt my eyes sting. Finally... We're here again in each others' arms. "I missed
you too," I answered as my hands trailed on his back until it reached the back of
his neck. I pulled his head down and our lips met half-way.
We're now chest to chest and his hard, heated length is touching my stomach.
Knowing how excited he is made me shiver. I felt his hand found the lock on my bra,
he unlatched it and immediately ripped the bra off my chest. He threw it over his
shoulder.
I laughed but I breath hitched when I felt his tongue trail on my collarbone.
I really missed the way how Kade worship my body. Thank gods he broke off his
relationship with Sabrina.
"I was the one who asked for a cool off."
Shit. Wait.
I pushed Kade gently. "Wait. Stop."
Kade raised his head and waited for me.
"You said you were the one who asked for
a 'cool-off'," I said, asking for a clarification.
"Yeah." Kade leaned closer to claim my lips but I stopped him again.
"Cascade, wait!" He stopped and looked at me patiently. "So you didn't break up
with her?" I asked, hoping that I am wrong.
"No, I-" I interrupted him.
I pushed him hard and I sat up on his bed. "Shit. What the hell are we doing?!" I
said, panicking. Fuck. Where the hell are my clothes? Shit! Mali to! Hindi kami
ganito!
"Salazar..." I heard him call me.
I jumped off his bed and moved away from him. "We're not like this, Kade! We're not
cheaters!" I yelled at him. Turning my back on him, I looked for my discarded
clothes. The first thing I saw was my bra. I put it on immediately.
I heard him heaved a deep sigh. "Goddammit. This is a mistake. We should just
forget this happened."
I whirled back and saw him already standing.. "What?" I asked, my voice high-
pitched. Fuck. Oo, I know it's a mistake. Pero ganun-ganun na lang na kakalimutan?
Hindi na pag-uusapan para ma-solve? Am I really that easy to forget? Why? Is he
gonna go back to her after?
"Shit. Salazar. I'm sorry," Kade said as he tried to get close to me.
I lifted my hands to stop him. "No. Don't you touch me!"
"Salazar. Please, let's talk about this," he said, his voice pleading.
I shook my head, my tears rolled down on my cheeks. Fuck. Ang bilis-bilis ko umiyak
lalo na if it comes to him. Ayoko na. Lagi na lang ako nasasaktan dahil sa kanya.
"No. This has to stop. Sobrang sakit na."
"I'm so fucking sorry..." Kade said as he pulled me against him.
I pushed him away. "I look forward to never seeing you again." Kade looked
shattered even before I get to finish my last words to him. I can't see him again.
This could happen again. I don't want to have another relapse. "Kasi ayoko na ng
ganito. I'm gonna move-on now, Kade."
=================
Chapter 40: Storm
Chapter 40
Storm
Three Weeks Ago...
"Whatthefuuuuuuck," was the first thing that left my mouth when I fell face first
from my bed. What the fuck is going on?!
"Good morning, sunshine!" someone shouted. I guess it's Jamie.
Fuck. Why is she so cheery?! It's too early for her to shout. What the hell is she
here? May sarili siyang room!
"Afternoon na kaya!" another person said. Pati si Kim nandito?! "Bangon na! Ilang
araw ka na naming hindi nakikita! Magbo-bonding tayo!" Kim said. Ang aga-agang
sermon naman!
"Gusto niya yata kilitiin natin siya?" Jamie asked. I can just imagine the mischief
in her eyes.
"Or mas gusto niya yata na buhusan natin siya ng malamig na tubig?" Kim chimed in.
These two are ganging-up on me and I don't have any idea why!
I growled as I stood up. "Ano bang meron?" I asked irritably. I watched them get
close to me. Without warning, they started pushing me out of my own room!
Wala akong nagawa because what can one person do when she's ganged up by her two
best friends? So I just let them.
"Bibigyan ka namin ng divine intervention," J said before pushing me down the

couch. I leaned my back on it and watched their worried faces.
What's to worry? I'm just sleeping in my bedroom! "Alam ba yan ni Lord?" I asked
them sardonically.
K showed me her goofy grin. "Pa-deliver na ako ng pizza?" she asked. Peace-offering
siguro for waking me up. Good.
J sat beside me. "You
need to talk about Kade," she said as she faced me. "Hindi ka namin tatantanan ni K
hanggat di ka nag-oopen-up," she warned. My eyes widened betraying my pokerface.
How the hell did she know about my past relationship with Kade?! Shit. Nakita niya
ba kami sa Davao? Bakit ngayon niya lang ako iko-confront about it? That was, like,
two weeks ago!
Shit! Naalala ko na naman! Thank you very much, Jamie. You're ruining this whole
moving-on thing that I'm desperately doing.
I cleared my face with any emotion when I saw her slight smirk. "I don't know what
you're talking about," I denied before looking away... Wala pa ba yung delivery ng
pizza?
I let out a shriek when Jamie slapped me on my arm. That hurts! "Matagal ko ng alam
na siya si MFG no! Huwag ka ng mag-deny dahil matagal ko na kayong nahuli! Aamin ka
na kay Kim ngayon!"
WHAT?! HOW?!
"H-How?" I stuttered in shock and panic.
"Foam Party sa Boracay," she answered with a smirk.
The foam party... It was the night Kade and I won a free accommodation in a hotel
suite. It was the same night I lost my virginity to Kade.
I sighed then closed my eyes. There's just too many good memories.
I opened my eyes and looked straight in J's eyes. "Fine. And then what? We'll
celebrate it with a pity party?" I asked, a little annoyed.
J snorted. "No. Sabi ko nga, bibigyan ka namin ng intervention!"
Divine intervention? How will they do that? Not to be a bitch but I think they're
not in a position to give an intervention.
She just had her first serious boyfriend that didn't take her seriously pala. But
he's here to take her back but she's being pabebe now. Tapos si Kim. She's single
and too dense para magka boyfriend.
So again... How?!
Kim came back and sat on her bean bag."15 minutes daw bago dumating yung pizza,"
she informed us.
"K, may aaminin sa atin si L," Jamie said all of a sudden.
I groaned. There's no escaping this!
Seating up straight, I looked at Jamie's annoying encouraging face."Fine!" I

huffed. "Iisa lang si MFG at Kade. Happy?" I said, finally admitting one of my most
kept secrets.
"Oo nga," Kim agreed. "Yun lang?" she asked, confused.
Jamie and I looked at her, shocked. "Kailan mo pa alam?" J asked.
Kim shrugged. "Matagal ko na silang pinagdududahan pero wala naman akong nakukuhang
confirmation. Pero kahit nga na hindi confirmed yung suspicions ko, hindi na ako
nagulat."
I groaned once again. "All this time, you guys knew?"
I just wasted, what four months, of hiding them my thing with Kade. Matagal na
palang alam and they weren't asking me about it?
I watched them both nod. "Alam mo, ikwento mo na nang buo!" J suggested.
Saan ko ba uumpisahan? Sa umpisa, probably.
"It all started in school. We were classmates," I started with a sigh. "There was
one time na may debate kami sa International Law class namin. He had beaten me in
the debate. You know how competitive I could get, right? May hangover ako nun and I
went to class with my party clothes paImagine
how mad I was pa when he rubbed it in my face after. Super shitty day yun."
"Okay. Tapos?" Jamie asked, her tsismosa mode is clearly on right now.
"Yun nga. Dun nagsimula." "Every time we'll see each other, he would always make an
effort to piss me off. Tapos naging study buddies pa kami."
"Yeah, nasabi mo nga," Kim said.
"Whenever we get bored, kung hindi asaran we would dare each other or make bets."
"Dun kayo nagka-developan?"
"Maybe. The attraction was there na kahit nagkakainisan kami before." Oh. Yung sa
na stranded kami sa school nung nagkaroon ng supertyphoon. "We decided to be 'more'
when we got stranded in school because the supertyphoon."
"And then?" J prompted.
"Yun na. Typical exclusively dating shit. First date, first real kiss, first' I
love you's,' first big fight... A lot of firsts," I added vaguely. I love these
girls but I know their principles are different from mine. I don't want to see them
giving me judgmental looks. Masakit kapag sa best friends mo makukuha yun.
"Wait. Sabi mo first 'I love you's.' Sinong unang nagsabi sa inyo?" Kim asked.
"Siya."
Kim pulled a long face. She's clearly disappointed. Napaka-transparent, as always.

"Mukha namang okay yung relationship niyo kahit patago," she said.
Jamie nodded. "Oo nga! Tsaka bakit kayo naghiwalay? You two looked good together!"
I smiled at them. "We might have looked good together but that doesn't mean we're
good for each other."
Yes, okay kami nung umpisa. But I have too
many problems and my trust issues got the best of me. "Tsaka things happened-I
don't want to elaborate them-pero because of those things, I realized it would we
better for us to stop."
"Anong ginawa niya?"
I sucked in a huge breath when I felt my eyes started to sting. Shit. I don't want
them to see me crying."He fought for us for a while. But he gave-up eventually."
"Wait, what? Sabi niya sa akin you dumped him," Jamie asked confused.
Wait a minute. "You guys talked about us?" I asked, my eyes squinting at her.
Jamie scratched her head sheepishly. "Sorry sa pangingialam pero hindi ko na kasi
napigilan ang sarili ko nun. Inis na inis ako sa kanya nun! Sinugod ko siya at kung
anu-ano pinagsasabi ko sa kanya. Then he just exploded. Sabi niya you dumped him.
Tapos bigla na lang siya nag walk-out," she blabbed.
Her admission made me scoff. First of all, yes, I did dump him. But he prompted me
to do it because he got too mad. "He made me dump him. Pinilit niya ako kasi sabi
niya walang patutunguhan yung relationship namin," I said, shaking my head. He
didn't really say that but that was the gist of what he said that night.
I am too damaged and he's too tired with me rejecting him. Pagod na rin ako for
him, for us kaya pumayag ako.
"Hindi ko maintidihan," Kim said. "Tapos biglang may bago siyang girlfriend?"
That's when the waterworks started. I hate remembering that bitch's face. I hate
remembering what happened in Davao. I hate remembering the last words he said to
me.
I swiped my tears angrily. "And
I don't care! We're done! It's over!"
Jamie smiled. "Parehas kayo ng sinabi."
I swallowed the huge lump that formed in my throat. "I don't care. I just wanna
forget that asshole. I just wanna move the fuck on!" I exploded. I covered my face
and started crying.
Shit. Wala na. I'm crying in front of them na. Nakakahiya!
"You know what? You should start dating again," I heard Jamie said.
I wiped my face with my bare hands before dropping them. I looked up at her and
frowned. She said before na it's bad to use another guy. Kaya nga binitawan niya si
Gabe!
"I thought you said it's bad to use a guy para maka move-on?" I asked.
Jamie nodded. "Masama siya kung gagamitin yung guy para makapaghiganti. But if
you're moving on for yourself, I don't think it's bad naman," she said with a huge
grin.
No. Imposibleng kay Jamie nanggaling ang suggestion na yan. Where's my naïve best
friend and what did she do to her?
"Kanino naman ako makikipag-date?" I asked her.
She smirked. "Kami na bahala ni Kim. We know your type of guy."
Kim's eyes widened. "We do?" she asked.
Sinasabi ko na nga ba. Jamie's planning something evil.
"Oo!" she said. I noticed she secretly kicked K's foot.
"Pero-" She got interrupted by the knock on our frontdoor. That must be the
delivery boy. Kim stood up and went to the door.
I looked back at Jamie. My suspicions grew when she looked back at me with an
innocent expression. "You're planning something," I said
to her.
She grinned at me innocently. "Wala kaya."
Let's just hope na walang masamang mangyayari because of it. Because if it does,
Jamie's dead.
***
Ugh. I fell out of my bed face first once again. When will this stop?
Instead on going back to my bed, I rolled to my side and tried to go back to sleep.
But just as soon as I was about to fall back to sleep, a loud banging sound wakes
me up.
Grumbling in irritation, I stood up and scrubbed the sleepiness off my face.
The banging sound went off again. "What the hell is that?" I asked.
"Is anyone home?" A male voice boomed from outside. A very familiar male voice.
"Shit!" I hissed in shock. What the hell is he doing here?! Didn't he think about
Kim and Jamie? Yes, umamin na ako sa kanila but he doesn't know that!
I left my bedroom running, not caring what I look like. He had seen me at my worst,
seeing my just-woke-up face is nothing compared to that.
I immediately opened the front door and went outside.
And I was right. It was Cascade Ongpauco who's in our doorstep.
"What the hell were you thinking?" I hissed at him. "What are you doing here?
Someone might see you!"
"I can't do this anymore." He raked his hand on his hair before pulling it in
frustration. "You need to know everything, Salazar."
I shook my head. "You're wasting your time, Ongpauco. We're done." I was about to
turn my back on him when he pulled me back. "What the hell?! Tapos na tayo! How
many times do I have to tell you that?" I growled at him.
He leaned down until our faces
were just inches apart. "Until you convince me." Kade's hand tightened on my arm.
"You have never convinced about us being done."
"Just leave me alone, will you?" I sneered, trying to pull away from him but to no
avail. His grip is too tight!
"Look, Salazar. I know I said some things that hurt you but you have to know that I
just chose the wrong words." His voice lowered. "I don't want to forget you or any
moment with you and I never stopped choosing you."
I shook my head. No. Ayoko na magpabola. "How many times have you practice that in
front of a mirror?"
"Stop it dodging me, Salazar!" he admonished. I just glared at him.
Kade sighed. "Do you still love me? Do you still feel something for me? Even just a
little?"
I tried to break free from him again. Grabe! He had the gall to ask that? Kailan pa
ba yung huli naming pagkikita? Sa Davao pa yun! And it ended up awfully! "You have
no right asking me what I feel, Ongpauco. We're done!" I said this to him before.
Oo, I'm still not over him because it still hurts! But he doesn't have to know
that!
He doesn't need to know I still cry myself asleep every night.
He doesn't need to know my heart still breaks every time I hear his name from my
friends.
He doesn't need to know I still love him.
"We're not!'
But we are! Lalo na at nasa picture na si Sabrina. Gusto niya o hindi si Sabrina,
she's still his girlfriend. I don't want to be his side hoe or his number two! "If
you're bored with Sabrina, don't drag me into this! If you're thinking of cheating
on her with me, think again. I am not a second choice!
I will never be your back-up plan!"
Kade shook his head adamantly. "I am not cheating on her with you. She and I are
done."
No. I refuse to believe it. I know Sabrina won't let him leave her like that!
"I hate cheaters. You hate cheaters. We both hate them, Ongpauco! Don't be like
one," I said. I can feel my throat closing up as the tears started to well my eyes.
I tried to blink them away.
Kade's hand loosened his hold on my arm. "I am not. You're my only choice." He took
my face with both of his hand and leaned close. "I'm still in love with you,
Salazar," he said firmly.
I want to believe him. But I just can't. I can't forget what happened between us
for the last three months. It hurts too damn much. I'm not even sure if this pain
was even worth it.
I let him go because I thought I was bad for me. He let go of me too but he had a
different girl in his arms right after giving up on me.
"But you chose her over me!" I sneered at him, covering up the hurt.
Kade dropped his hands. "I had to choose her over you for my sisters," he said, his
voice resigned.
"What?!" Did I hear him right or was it just my imagination?
"You heard it right." I just stared at him. "If it wasn't for Bay and Ocean, I will
never choose her over you."
I swallowed the huge lump on my throat. "But why?" Anong connection nung dalawang
bata dito?
"Remember the night I came home from Monaco? The night we fought and broke up?" he
asked.
"Yeah. Of course."
"My mom," Kade paused, taking a deep breath. Just by looking at his movements, I
know what he will say
next will probably shock me. "My mom tried to kill herself."
I gasped. I was right. "Oh my gods. Is she okay?"
He nodded. "She's okay now." Kade took a step back and put his hands inside the
front pockets of his pants. "I was gonna go back to you to apologize. But my dad
called me and made me go to the hospital to watch over her." My eyes widened. He
did?
"He got so mad at me when he learned I didn't check on my mom. He knew I was with
you." Kade smiled bitterly. "He didn't want me to see you again. Of course, I
didn't agree with him. We had a nasty fight because of that. Fuck, I almost punched
him in the face."
I cringed. That must've been a nasty fight for him to want to punch his own father
in the face.
"He doesn't have the right to dictate my life. He was never a father to me or to my
siblings."
"And Sabrina?" I asked. I wanna know how she ended up in the picture.
"The morning after our fight, my dad called. I thought our talk was done. But of
course, Enrico Ongpauco wouldn't be done until he has won."
I frowned. What does that mean? Ano to? Chinese-related shit? Great Wall of China?
But Sabrina is not Chinese!
"What happened?" I asked.
"He said he wants me to date Sabrina Sarte, his company's CFO's daughter."
Oh.
Kade's face turned hard. "He said if I disobey him, he will cut his ties with us.
He won't pay for my mom's medical bills. He will freeze our bank accounts, our
trust funds. Shit, babe. I can't do that to my sisters. They're just kids!" he
said, his nostrils flaring. You can see how furious he is.
"You had no
choice," I said in realization. That's why he said he was forced to be with her. I
understand it now.
I got surprised when Kade took a step towards me and cupped my face again. "You
will always be my choice but when it comes to my little sisters, I will always have
to choose them first."
Gods. Masakit yung ginawa niya. But I can't blame him for what he did. Yes, he made
some dick moves to me pero I did some shitty things to him too.
"And you did," I said, my voice small.
Kade pressed his forehead against mine. "I'm sorry it had to be this way," he
whispered. I was about to close my eyes when we heard loud footsteps coming towards
us.
Kade and I jumped away from each other and looked at the person who's coming.
"Aw, shit. Wrong timing," the guy said.
I squinted my eyes at the guy. I would have recognized him easily if I was wearing
my glasses or my contact lenses.
Oh. Best friend ni Asher to! It's Yap. "Yap? Anong ginagawa mo dito?" I asked.
Yap looked uneasy as his eyes shifted to Kade before it went back to me. "Uhh...
May sasabihin sana ako sa'yo."
I heard Kade sighed in exasperation. "Can you go back later? We're still taking
here," he said rudely.
Yap's eyes flashed. "Actually, this news can't wait," he shot back.
Fuck. I'm not prepared for his pissing contest.
With what happened between us earlier, Kade's usually long patience snapped. In a
second, his hands were gripping the collar of Yap's shirt. "Tang ina, pare.
Nananadya ka ba?" he growled at him.
I immediately went to them. "Hey, Kade!" I wrapped my
arms around his middle and dragged him away. "Stop!" I yelled at him to make him
stop.
It was effective. Kade stopped and Yap shrugged his shoulders. He was clearly
irritated with their untimely scuffle.
"Pwede ba huwag niyo kong isali sa drama niyo?" he spat at us. "Nandito ako para
kay Asher."
Kade and I both stiffened at the mention of our friend's name. "What? What happened
to Asher?" I moved away from Kade and went closer to Yap.
Yap took a huge breath. "May hindi magandang nangyari sa kanya sa Singapore. Ang
tagal na niya kayong mine-message sa Facebook!"
Kade cleared his throat. He's clearly uncomfortable. "I haven't checked my Facebook
since last week."
Me, too. Pero nakausap ko lang si Asher recently. "Pero pwede niya naman kaming ma-
contact sa phone. Lagi naman kami nagkakausap sa Facetime!"
Yap glared at us. He didn't like our alibis. "Well, kung mabubuti kayong kaibigan
dapat nagtaka na kayo bakit hindi niyo siya nakakausap for almost a week. Edi sana
alam niyong nasira yung phone niya nung may tumulak sa kanya sa hagdan at nahulog
siya!"
"What?!" I sputtered. My heart squeezed when I imagined what Asher feels right
now. Good gods.
"Yes. You heard it right. Nahulog siya sa hagdan and now she's suffering from a
career-ending injury."
Oh my gods.
"She won't be able to play tennis anymore?" Kade asked in disbelief.
Yap sighed. "She tore her rotator cuff. Marami pa siyang injuries... Concussions,
broken bones. Pero pinakamalala dun ay yung sa rotator cuff niya dahil hindi na
siya makakapaglaro ulit sabi ng mga doktor doon."
covered my mouth with my shaking hand. If I open my mouth again, I know I'm gonna
choke up and start crying. I can't believe that happened to Asher. Fuck. In just a
snap, her dreams just vanished into thin air.
"How is she now? How do we contact her? Does she have a new number?" Kade asked.
Yap dictated it from his memory and Kade typed it on his phone. I composed myself
for the mean time.
I dropped my hands as I watched Yap slid his phone on his pocket. "Kumustahin niyo
siya. Miss na niya kayo. She needs her friends," he said before turning away from
us.
Kade and I looked at each other. We're both too tired to move and too shocked to
speak.
I looked back at the direction where Yap went. I noticed something was on the
floor. It was an ID. I bent down and grabbed it's ID lanyard.
"Yap!" I called Yap. He's not that far yet. Hindi pa siya nakakababa ng stairs.
"You dropped your ID!" I shouted at him as I stood up.
Yap turned around and sprinted towards me. "Akin na! Huwag mong tignan!" he yelled.
Of course, I didn't listen. My curiosity got better of me that's why I looked at

his idea.
ONGPAUCO, STORM YAP
"Storm pala pangalan mo," I mumbled.
I gasped when something clicked in my head. "Oh my gods. Storm Ongpauco?" I said
looking up at Yap's horrified expression.
"What?" Kade sputtered.
"Give me that!" Yap said before snatching his ID from my hand.
"Who are you?" I asked in disbelief. My eyes roaming at his face.
Oh my gods. I'm not seeing things, am I? That's why he looked so familiar when
Asher introduced him to us. Shit. It's his eyes!
"I'm just Yap. Don't tell anyone about this," he sneered before he left us.
I looked at Kade with wide eyes."Oh my gods. Kade..."
He was looking at the direction where Yap, or should I say Storm, went.
"Fuck," he said before his knees gave out and he sat on his hunches.
=================
Chapter 41: Drunk Driving
Chapter 41
Drunk Driving
It has been two days since Kade cornered me in our apartment's front door and that
'Storm Yap-Ongpauco' Debacle. It has been two days since I saw Kade. I haven't
talked to him too. Not for the lack of trying, though.
I swear, I think I did everything naman to reach out to him. I called and texted
him. I didn't go to his unit, though because I was in charge of taking care of
Papa. Pero like what they said, hindi mo mahahanap ang taong ayaw magpahanap.
I stopped reaching out to him today. I think it's best if I leave him alone now.
Hindi biro yung nalaman niya. Just seeing his pale face when Yap-ugh Storm left, I
know it did a number on him. Fucked up na yung family situation namin but Kade's
family took it to the other level.Super fucked up yung family drama nila.
They're not just seven siblings pretending to be cousins now. Eight na. And who
knows? Baka marami pa sila! Only Architect Enrico Ongpauco could answer that
question. If Kade doesn't know anything, what more his younger brothers and
sisters?
I also can't deny that I want to continue our talk about us. I want to know
everything. I want to ask some questions. I need answers and I know he has
questions he wants to be answered too.
"Malalim yata iniisip mo diyan, bu?" I heard mama asked.
I looked at her. "Hmm?" She just stared back at me, her eye glasses hanging low on
her nose bridge. "Uhh... It's nothing, ma," I said awkwardly.
Mama arched an eyebrow. "Talaga lang ha?"
I smiled at her before looking away.
Stop spacing out, Louisse. Mukha kang tanga.
"So... I heard nagkausap na kayo ni papa mo weeks ago." That made me look at her
again. Oops. Naunahan na naman ako ni papa magsabi. Him and his big mouth. What do
I expect though? He can't keep a secret from my mother.
I nodded. "I have questions, mama. I just don't know how to ask them to you."
Mama shook her head as she piled papa's hospital documents on her lap. "Just spit
them out. Ask them plainly," she said, looking up at me. "I can take it, anak."
I took a deep breath. Just be frank but not tactless. Mama mo pa rin yan, L.
Okay, here goes nothing... "Why did you take him back after everything?" I asked.
Noticing she stiffened on her seat, my mouth involuntarily blabbed. "I mean, I love
dad. But what he did was horrible. He left us for what? Two-three years? Tapos when
he decided to come back, he left three people in Switzerland naman." I let out the
breath that I was holding. "Hindi ka ba nakonsensya?"
She didn't answer right away. I just watched her face the whole time. "Nakonsensya
syempre," she finally said. "But let's be honest, I love him. I'm his wife and he's
the father of my child." Mama put the documents on the center table before she
moved to seat directly in front of me.
Mama leaned towards me. "And who says I took him back right away?" she asked with
an arched eyebrow.
My brows furrowed. "What do you mean, ma?"
She leaned back and sat up straight. "When he got back from Switzerland and came
straight to me, syempre nakatikim ng sampal sakin ang papa mo. Even if we're apart,
I kept tabs
on him. I know he has a new family there." She chuckled as she reminisced. "He
explained everything."
"And then?" I prodded. Yun lang? Don't tell me she took him back right away that
time!
"And then, I asked him to leave," she said with a shrug.
"What did papa say?"

He eyes visibly lit up. "He said he'll come back. He promised to make himself a
better man for us." She smiled at the memory. "Sabi ko, 'lumang tugtugin na 'yan.'
I don't need promises. I need the husband that I deserve and my kid needs a father
she deserves."
We got quiet for a minute before she broke the silence.
"So, he did change for the better. I took your father back."
I'm still not convinced though. Siguro marami pang hindi sinasabi si mama na para
sa kanila na lang ni papa. Maybe she's telling me the watered-down PG-rated version
of this story.
"Why? How? He left you."
She smiled again, but this time her smile is sad. "Because before that, he was just
the perfect guy. I know I'm hard to be with nung kabataan ko but he never left my
side. Kapag may problema ako, siya ang takbuhan ko. Whenever I feel weak and down,
he gives me strength. And then he gave me you. Ang dami niyang ginawang tama and I
chose to take him back because of them."
"And you guys really love each other," I said, remembering the times na mahuhuli ko
sila sa living room sa house namin sa Cavite. They just talk but their eyes...
Gosh, their eyes say otherwise. Simple connection but you know it's deep and
ingrain.
"Oo, may ginawa siyang mali. Pero itinama niya rin yun kahit na it was a bit late
dahil marami na siyang nadamay.
But it turned out the best decision for all of us, right?"
"Yeah, I guess so."
Mama let out a soft laugh, "Maiintindihan mo lang ako anak kung nakapagmahal ka na
to the point when you can love the person despite of all his imperfections and
shortcomings."
What she said made me freeze. Did I love Kade that way? Maybe hindi pa ako umaabot
sa ganun... but he's my first love and I love him still. He will probably the guy I
will only ever love.
"Because, bubu, when you truly love someone, you don't just accept their good side.
You must accept their flaws... warts and all."
Fuck. It was like mama described the way how Kade loves me.
It was like a slap in the face.
"Ma... He's back," I found myself saying after a good solid minute of silence.
"Cascade?" she simply asked. I nodded. "What's the problem?"
I looked at her before answering. "I don't know if it's wise to take him back."
"Why?" she asked with a confused frown.
"Because... When we had our falling-out, we said some things to each other.
Horrible things, ma." I don't need to elaborate those things. They're too personal
and it feels wrong to say it out loud to my mother.
And yeah, walang mother ang matutuwa if she heard the words 'premarital sex',
'pregnancy scare' and 'rebound girlfriend' from her only daughter, right?
"Tingin mo hindi kami nagkakasagutan ng papa mo?" Mama scoffed.
I rolled my eyes. "But you guys are married."
"Marriages lang ang dapat sinasalba, is that what you're saying?" Mama asked. You
can tell she's annoyed from the tone of her voice. "When
the going gets tough in a relationship, bitiw agad?"
Ouch. Bulls eye.
"Hindi naman po. It's just that there's too much history between us." I sighed. How
do I say this na hindi siya madidisappoint right after hearing it? Bahala na.
"I brought out the worst in him, ma. I don't want to be a shitty girlfriend to him
anymore."
"Then, don't." She looked at me straight into my eyes. "Gayahin mo yung papa mo.
Make yourself a better you. Hindi niyo naman kailangang magbalikan agad. Fix
yourselves first. And then when you guys think it's time to be together na, talk...
COMMUNICATE."
***
"We have a problem," was the first thing Kim said to me when I got inside the
apartment.
Oh my gods, I just got home from a long drive from Cavite. Hindi man lang ako
pinagpahinga before dropping something like that. I haven't even think about my own
problems.
"What problem?" I asked as I walked past her. I just wanna go to my room, lie down
and sleep for, like, weeks.
Kim followed me as I walked up to my door. "Umuwi kahapon si Jamie from Japan."
That made me stop. "Napaaga ata siya?" I asked, confused. If I remember correctly,
dapat ngayon palang sila uuwi ni River from Japan.
"Hindi niya kasama si River umuwi!" Kim exclaimed.
I whipped around and looked at her. "What do you mean hindi niya kasama pauwi si
River?" I asked, confused.
"Iniwan niya dun! She left Japan without telling River!" Kim said, her tone
panicky.
"What? Why?!" I asked in surprise.
Kim sighed as she massaged her temple. "You have to ask her that. But
please tread carefully." Kim looked back at Jamie's bedrrom door. "Jamie's a mess,"
she said. Worry evident in her voice and face.
"How did she get here?" Did they get into a fight and River sent her here? Gago yun
ah.
Kim shook her head. "Nangutang siya pambayad ng plane ticket sa friend ni River. He
just left him there ng walang pasabi."
What the hell? And River let her? Things are just not adding up! I looked at Kim
and noticed the telltale sign of avoidance. She's hiding something. "May dapat ba
akong malaman before I go there and talk to her?" I asked as I pointed Jamie's
bedroom door with my thumb.
Kim sighed and squeezed her eyes shut. "It's not my secret to tell," she groaned.
She opened her eyes and handed me a torn piece of paper. "But before you go there,
can you give this to her?"
Like I have a choice. "Okay. Magpapalit lang ako ng pambahay."
I went inside my room and nagpalit na into my pambahay. Of course, before going
outside I read Kim's message to Jamie. What, can't blame a girl for being curious.
Ephesians 2:8
For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith-and this is not from
yourselves, it is the gift of God
Um, okay. Why am I not surprise that this torn piece of paper contains a bible
verse?
***
I knocked on her door twice before opening it. "Knock, knock!" I sing-songed to her
when I slipped my head inside her bedroom door.
J whipped her head back. She's in front of her bookshelves. Her books are scattered
on the floor. I watched her put them on the side before
standing up.
Kim's right. Jamie's a mess. She's cleaning up her room! That rarely happens! She
only cleans her room kapag sobrang visible na ng dusts, o kapag mukhang babahayan
na ng ahas yung room niya or kapag she's going through something at nagpapaka-busy
siya.
"Pasok," she said, gesturing for me to get inside. "Saglit lang. Itatabi ko lang
saglit yung mga kalat ko." I watched her grab the discarded bedsheet and pillow
cases and put them on her hamper.
I went to her bed and sat down. "What's up?" she asked as she sat down beside me.
She looks nervous. She also looks like she hasn't taken a shower! Her hair are in
disarray, her clothes are thin and ratty.
"Nothing much," I answered, taking my eyes off her. Hmm... It looks like a
hurricane came and left destruction in her room.
"Nasaan ka kahapon? Hindi ka umuwi ha," she finally asked.
So we're going there. Ako muna bago siya.
I heaved a sigh. "I was in Cavite.I spent my time with the folks," I answered. Wala
kaming patutunguhan if won't go straight to the point. I took the torn piece of
paper Kim asked me to give her. I handed over it to her. "By the way, Kim gave me
this. She said, ibigay ko raw sa'yo."
I watched her smile as she read the bible verse. What the hell is going on here?
She put the note on her bedside table. I interrupted her before she could say
something.
"Let's cut the crap. What happened in Japan?" I asked, giving her the pokerface.
"Sinabi na sa'yo ni Kim?" she asked, stalling.
I shook my head. Wala namang sinabi si Kim regarding her secret. But
I know something is really not right that she went home without her guy. "She
didn't have to tell me. The mere fact that you were already here yesterday was a
dead give-away. So, what gives, J?"
"Okay naman talaga kami nung una e," she started, her eyes downcast. "Alam mo ba?
Dinala niya ako sa DisneySea! Umiyak pa ko nun kasi hindi ko ma-contain yung
emotions ko. Siya pa nagpatahan sakin! Nakakahiya!"
I heard her sniff. I don't know if she's crying or not. "And then when he brought
me sa Star Wars Con, he finally said 'I love you' to me!" she looked up, her eyes
wide with happiness and excitement. "Sa harap pa nang maraming tao! Walang pilitan!
Hindi na ako nagpapanggap na tulog! I heard him say it! I watched him say it for
the very first time! Face-to-face! Ang saya-saya namin nun, L!" Her smile
disappeared and it was replaced with a sad one.
"Tapos akala ko hindi na niya ako madadala sa Wizarding World kasi hectic yung
sched niya but he found a way to bring me there! Sobrang nakaka-high yung
experience! Sobrang saya! Alam mo naman yung feeling diba? Bilang isang Potterhead?
Diba? Diba? Sobrang big deal!"
I just nodded as I listened to her stories.
"River showed me the other parts of his world that I haven't seen. Dinala niya ako
mismo sa racing track! Nakita ko kung ano yung mga nangyayari sa racing track, sa
pit garage nung team nila tapos pinakilala niya ako sa teammates niya! My gods, L.
Surreal experience makita siyang mag-race ng live!" she kept on blabbing.
"Tapos nanalo pa siya! Nadamay ako sa champagne shower dahil sa kanya. I was
wearing a white shirt kaya
nagkanda-leche leche na." She bit her lower lip. That made me arch an eyebrow.
"Tapos ayun, things happened..." she trailed off.
"What do you mean 'things happened?'" I asked, suspicious.
"We had sex."
Oh. I did not expect that.
I looked at her face and saw how sad and devastated she is."Did he force you into
sleeping with him?" I asked even though I somehow know that River wouldn't dare
doing that.
She shook her head. That made me frown. So if River didn't force her into sleeping
with him, why is she acting like this? Regrets, maybe?
"So, ginusto mo rin?" I asked again.
She looked away and didn't answer. That means she liked it and she's ashamed to
admit it.
"Do you still love him?" I asked remembering what she said before she and River
left for Japan. She said she's gonna take him back if he asks again.
She nodded eagerly.
"Do you regret it? Losing your virginity to him?"
Jamie didn't answer again. She clearly regrets doing it. That kind of made me sad.
"You lost it to the one you love. Why are you regretting it, J?" I asked, my voice
sad with a tinge of disappointment.
"I wanted to keep my promise to myself na hindi ako makikipag-sex hanggat di ako
kasal," she blurted out.
Oh. So that was it. The moral shit this society drilled in our heads.
I scoffed. "That's bullshit and you know it. That's what society drilled in our
heads. Are you seriously fucking up your relationship because of these so-called
promises?" I asked, annoyed and infuriated.
"L, hindi ganun! I get your point, though. Pero hindi ganun. Gusto ko
lang may mapatunayan sa sarili ko."
Mapatunayan sa sarili ang alin? Na hindi siya malandi? That she's not a slut? That
she's not going to hell because she stayed a virgin until she got married?
Does losing your virginity at a young age makes you less of person? Does it makes
you less of a woman? That's just bull-shit. And sexist, I might add. Bakit walang
ganung issue with guys? Why does it have to be us, women, that should be 'virgin,
pure and reserved'? Why does those rules do not apply with males?
I let out a breath. "What do you wanna prove to yourself? J, you're in love with
the guy! Nangyari na! You can't blame him for taking away something you wanna give
to your future husband! You said it yourself, he didn't force you. Ginusto mo yun."
Yes, I know we have different principles and beliefs. Siguro kaya hindi ko sinasabi
sa kanila yung decisions ko with things like this because I don't want to influence
them. But good gods, she's going to waste something so precious because of those
bull-shit rules!
"My gods, J, Why are you making this hard for him? Why are you making this hard for
you? You guys love each other. Don't let this issue break you apart. Talk and
listen to him. You made a mistake, learn from it."
Wow. Nagsalita ka rin naman no, Louisse Salazar?
I squeezed my eyes shut. Ito ang mahirap when it comes to giving advices. Ang
galing-galing mo magbigay ng advice na common sense lang naman ang sagot. Pero when
it comes to yourself and your own problems, hindi mo na ma-apply yung pag gamit ng
common sense. Darn it.
I opened my eyes and looked straight into her
troubled eyes. "Trust me, J. You'll regret letting him go more than losing your
virginity with him. You'll regret it if you won't do anything to fix this fucked-up
situation. Fix this. Because trust me, living in regret is like living in hell.
I've been there and done that. And fuck, I'm doing it again."
I stormed out of her room. What I said back there was like a cold shower.
I've been through her hell, it was even worse. But I was the only one who made me
go through that all by myself and I'm doing it again it.
Ayoko na.
I need help.
I need Kade's help.
***
I woke up with a start when I heard a loud bang. I sat up and I attention was
immediately caught by a man's silhouette on my window.
My eyes widened. Oh my gods.
I was about to scream when I saw his face.
It was Kade.
Fucking shit. He scared the crap out of me.
I jumped out of my bed and went towards my window. I opened it with a loud slam. I
noticed him wince.
"I almost had a heart attack, you asshole!" I hissed at him.
"About damn time you opened this window," he said before shoving my face. I took a
step back in surprise. Did he just shove my face with his bare hand? What the fuck?
I watched him scrambled inside my window. Mukha siyang tanga honestly. It looks
like he lost his coordination with his limbs.
I was about to rip him a new one when he suddenly grabbed me and enveloped me into
a warm hug. He buried his face into my neck and I felt his lips touched the place
where my pulse is pounding.
"Fuck, I missed this," he said against
my throat.
I took in a huge breath and smelled alcohol in his breath. Shit. Kade's drunk.
Wait. If he's drunk, how did he got here? Please tell me he rode a taxi.
I moved away from him slightly to look at his face. I didn't see much because of
the darkness. "Please tell me you didn't drive your truck," I said to him.
"I did," he admitted, his voice apologetic. "Sorry, babe."
I took a deep breath. Patience, L. Patience. He's drunk and talking smack at him
won't do any good. "What are you doing with your life, Kade? What if you got into
an accident?" I asked, my voice tinge with disappointment. He drove here while he's
still roaring drunk and he climbed up at the four flights of steep ladder!
What if he accidentally lost his footing? Edi naaksidente pa siya!
"Will you visit me in the hospital if I did?" he suddenly ask.
"Kade..." I said, warning him. "Don't be stupid. Please." My patience is really

running out. Hindi cute ang mga lasing, promise.
He buried his face on my neck once again. "I won't do it again. I'm sorry."
I sighed. "That's better." Sana matandaan niya yan when he's sober. "Are you okay?"
I asked, my hands caressing his back. He wouldn't get drunk for shits and giggles.
It's impossible for him to get drunk just because he wants to. He's not like that.
"I'm not." Damn it. Si Yap nga pala. Or should I say Storm Yap-Ongpauco. How could
I forget?
"Wanna talk about it?"
He pulled away from me. "Can I stay over? Please?" he asked, I caught a whiff of
breath. Shit. It's too strong.
I reached over to my bedside table and
clicked the switch on my lamp. I looked at him and gasped. His face is beaten up!
I held his face with both hands. "What the hell, Kade?! What happened to your
face?" I asked, eyeing his beaten up face.
He grinned at me sheepishly. "I might have gotten into a fight." I winced seeing
his busted lip.
"Why?"
He shrugged. "I honestly don't know."
I sighed. What do you expect, Louisse? He's drunk. He can get into trouble just
because he's drunk!
"Hey, are you mad at me?" he asked when he noticed I've gone quiet. "Please don't
be mad. I won't do it again. I know I fuck-up a lot but I promise you, I'll try
harder not to. Just don't push me away again." And then he dropped to his knees and
hugged me on my middle, burying his head on my stomach.
Oh my gods. Why is he kneeling on the floor?
"Kade! Stand up!" I hissed at him while slapping his both arms. I even tried to
lift him up!
Shit. He's heavy! Drunk Kade is unpredictable. First time ko siyang makita na
ganito. Gaano ba kadami ang ininom niya to be this drunk?
"Kade, stand up!" I tried again but to no avail.
He shook his head. "You'll push me away again," he grumbled like a kid throwing a
temper-tantrum.
I stopped my efforts and just raked my hands on his hair. "No, babe. I promise you,
I won't." I'm tired of pushing you away, Kade. I won't do it again.
"I don't want to let you go again," he mumbled.
"You won't." I tilted his face and smiled at him. "C'mon, let's get to bed."
He obliged. He lied down on my bed after tugging off his chucks with his own feet.
I climbed and crawled towards him.
"Kade? Kade! Are you sleeping na?" I asked and watched him start to snore. Shiz. I
better take care of this big baby.
Before joining him in bed, I cleaned up him up first. I took of his clothes and
left him in his boxer briefs. I wiped his body with a wet towel to cool his body
temp. I cleaned up his face too. Gods, why did he let himself get beaten up?
His lower lip is busted and there's an angry bruise forming around his left eye and
on his right part of his jaw. There's also a cut in his left eyebrow.
Gaano ba karami nakaaway nito?
He's a big guy but he's drunk. It was no match if he was ganged up. Don't let me
even start with him driving drunk!
Gods. He can really be stupid sometimes.
I put a waste basket on his side in case he wakes in the middle of the night to
puke his guts out. I also put a glass of water on my bedside table and two
Tylenols.
I climbed up on my bed and draw the covers up. Sliding in the covers, I made myself
comfortable beside the huge warm baby .
"Salazar?" he rasped.
"Hmm?" I asked, closing my eyes.
He went silent. But a few minutes later, I found myself wrapped around his warmth.
His left arm is under my neck while his other is wrapped around my middle. I
snuggled on his neck and for the first time since I woke up after our one night in
Boracay, I felt safe and sound.
"I love you, Salazar," he mumbled in his sleep.
"I love you, too, Ongpauco."
=================
Chapter 42: Mrs #1
Chapter 42
Mrs #1
You know that light, content feeling when you wake-up from a deep slumber in a
warm, comfy bed? That feeling intensifies when you open your eyes and the first
thing you see is the person you're in love with?
It was surreal. It was dream-like. I even thought that I was probably still
sleeping and just dreaming. But Kade proved it wrong. He leaned over as he pulled
me close to him and kissed me on my forehead.
I closed my eyes again and sent a little prayer to God. Thank you po.
I wrapped my arms around him and snuggled closer to his naked, warm body. "You
marred your face," I whispered against his chest.
"I can feel it." His gashes must've hurt like a bitch now.
"Did you drink the meds?" I asked, remembering the things I did for him last night
and the meds I put in the bedside table.
"Yeah. Earlier," he answered. I closed my eyes and savored the vibration of his
chest as he talks and breathes. "Hangover's a bitch."
"How are you feeling now?" I inquired.
He sighed. "I'm okay. A bit embarrassed too." He let out a humorless laugh. "I'm
sorry for what happened last night."
"You've got nothing to apologize for. I'm glad you went here despite being shit-
faced." I moved away slightly and look at him straight in the eyes. "But I don't
want you to do it again. It's dangerous. I mean, drunk driving? Really? You could
have called me, you know."
Kade grinned sheepishly. "I don't even know how I got here."
I shook my head in disbelief. Boys. "Do you
remember who did this to you?" I put my hands on his face and lightly traced the
angry bruises that formed around his eyes and on his jaw.
He shook his head. "Nah. Probably some punk." Of course he wouldn't remember, he's
drunk.
"Aside from the obvious, how are you?" I asked hesitantly. But I think it's time we
start talking about our issues. "How are you holding up? About Yap?"
He let out a huge sigh. "I don't know what I should do next." His honesty hurt me.
I can see he's really clueless on what step he should take next.
But I learned one thing for the last few months, he can't face this alone. He needs
his brothers. "Will you tell your siblings?"
He shrugged. "I don't know. Something tells me Yap doesn't want anyone to know."
"Aren't you scared of him? Maybe he's planning something." We can't discredit the
possibility that he has a hidden agenda. Why show up now? Why study in the same
university? Why let his best friend get close to us?
Shit. Does Asher know?
Kade frowned in confusion. "Planning what? To be a part of our screwed-up family?

Nobody would want to be like us. If I had the chance, I would do everything just to
have a different name and surname."
Yeah. He has a point there. "No wonder he chose to be 'just Yap'."
"Yeah, that's the only name he has that didn't come from our dad." He shook his
head, still frowning. "I still can't understand my dad's obsession with water."
I let out a chuckle. I remembered Jamie, Kim and I talked about their hippie names.
"Maybe it has something to do with luck? Feng shui?"
"Yeah. That's
our standard answer whenever someone asks about our water-related names."
Kade and I went silent. We just lied down and held each other. Probably thinking
about our problems, possible solutions...
Shit. Wait. What if instead of being a 'problem', why can't Yap be the 'solution?'
"What if Yap can help you?" I blurted out before turning my head to the side to see
his face.
I saw him frowning. "With what?"

Ano pa? Edi all of his problems! His dad's threats with him, his mom and his
sisters. That awful Sabrina thing.
"With the Sabrina thing... unless you wouldn't want to end that shit with her," I
answered, sitting up.
His eyes went straight to my chest. I was just wearing a black cami... and it's
cold. "I told you before. I'm done with her. I'll work my ass off to provide for my
mom and sisters," he said to my chest.
I snapped my fingers in his face and his eyes immediately went to my face. "What if
we give your dad a taste of his own medicine?"
"I'm listening..." he said, sitting up.
"Blackmail." I gestured him. "Blackmail him about Storm. Tell him you know about
your missing brother. Tell him if he doesn't stop blackmailing you guys, you're
gonna tell the world about your family secret."
Kade raked his hand through his hair. My eyes immediately caught his flexing arm.
Fuck.
"It's not that simple, Salazar. My dad's a very dangerous guy." My eyes snapped to
his and I saw him smirking. I've been caught! "And we're not even sure if Yap's
really my brother."
"Edi let's ask him!" I suggested. "Then ask for Lake and River's help too. They
have
the right to know about this even though Yap doesn't want to, you know," I reminded
him. I know they wouldn't appreciate being kept in the dark about this.
"I know that. But there are other repercussions too."
"I know that, too. There are children involved. Your company, your family
reputation are involved too." Knowing they got each other's back, I know they're
gonna breeze through it. "But you'll survive it. I'm sure of it. "
Kade sighed. "I'll think about it."
I just nodded. After all, it's his decision to make, not mine. I'm going to support
him all the way, though. It's time to pay him back for what he has done to me
before. "Talk to Yap first. Ask him to tell you the side of his story."
"Enough about my family. How's yours?" He's clearly done discussing about his
family. I'm gonna give him some slack.
I smiled at him. "I finally found the courage to talk to them. We're fixing
everything."
"That's good. I'm proud of you." He smiled back. "How's your dad? Is he still ill?"
"He's kicking cancer's ass. He's a fighter."
"And your mom?" he asked, genuine concern for my parents' well-being etched on his
face.
"Strong as ever," I answered proudly. Napatunayan kong nothing's gonna make my

mother down. She's one tough woman.
"You? How are you holding up?" he asked as he reached for a stray strand of my
hair. I watched his hand play with it.
How am I holding up? Paano ko ba sasagutin yan with all honesty? I'm not totally
okay but I know I'm getting there. I'm working on with my personal issues and I'm
trying my hardest. "I-ah... I'm done being
alone," I found myself saying. "I'm done pushing everyone away."
His face softened but his grin remained. "Including me, I hope."
I smiled back. "Especially you."
"I didn't touch her," he said out of the blue.
"Huh?" I asked, confused.
"Sabrina." Oh. That girl. "You have to know it's just you. You're the only one who
I slept with for the last 12 months. I didn't kiss or touch her."
He stayed celibate even after we broke up? Kinaya niya yun? He and Sabrina didn't
do anything? Even kiss? Tulad ng sinabi niya before, he made all those 'in love
looks' just because my eyes were on them?
"So every lovey-dovey shit you did with her was just for me to get hurt?" I asked
slowly, needing clarification.
"Yeah." He took my hand and he squeezed them. "I figured you should move on if I
can't even fight for you. That's why I tried to hurt you by acting like I was taken
by her. But I can't take it, Salazar. For me, it's just you." The emotions on his
face is making me choke up with emotions too. Why is he always transparent with me?
"Yes, she had my word. But you have my heart."
I looked away from him when I started to tear up. "Shit. Ang cheesy mo," I joked.
Kade let out a chuckle. "I'm sorry. I just wanna let you know that it was only ever
you."
I looked back at him. "Really?" I asked, a little amazed at his admission.
He nodded. "Aside from my mom and sisters? You're the only woman in my life."
"That's good," I found myself saying, speechless.
"How about you?" he asked.
"Huh?" I blinked at him twice.
"How about Andrew Cajucom?"
Oh.
That guy. Si Andrew! Nagselos talaga siya dun?
"Jamie and Kim set me up with him," I said with a huge grin. "He wanted to piss you
off that's why he went with it. We got bored with each other. I guess there's no
chemistry between us?"
"Really?"
I nodded eagerly. "Yeah. We decided to be just buddies." Wala naman kasi talaga.
Friends lang.
"Just to piss me off, huh?"
"It worked, right?" I asked in a teasing voice. "I was so mad at you that's why I
agreed to go out with him. But I decided against it later on. It was still unfair
to you. Even though we ended bitterly, we had good memories too. You were good to
me and I don't want a rebound guy," I admitted. No more secrets.
"What now, babe?"
"Let's take it slow," I answered honestly. That's the only thing we should do now.
Slow down. We have the rest of our lives to think of. "Talk to Yap first-"
"I mean, about us. What are we going to do now?" Kade persisted. Akala niya ata I
misunderstood his first question.
"Let's savor this moment for now," I rephrased. "Let's work on ourselves first
before we get back with each other," I added to make it more clear.
Kade smiled. "That's fine with me."
I watched his head lean closer to me. I waited until were just inches apart before
I shoved his face away gently. "I said slow, Ongpauco." Kakasabi ko lang e. "And I
need to brush my teeth first."
Kade pulled my hand off his face and showed me his half-smile half-smirk. Gods, I
missed that annoying smirk. "Morning breath. Yeah, right."
I rolled my eyes at him before jumping out of my bed. I was
about to open my bathroom door when I heard his voice.
"Wait!"
I looked back and tilted my head to the said. "Yeah?"
"You're worth the trouble, Salazar," he said, his voice low and apologetic.
I know it's his way of apologizing for the hurtful words he said to me when he made
me dump him four months ago.
"You're worth the pain, Ongpauco," I answered, apologizing for every problem and
pain I have caused. That apology wasn't just for him, it was also for me.
***
"Just wait here, okay? This won't take long," Kade said before he ran towards the
staircase.
He just left me standing in the middle of his childhood home. Holy tacos, how did I
let him convince me to come here with him? Shiz. Baka makasalubong ko si Architect
Ongpauco.
Sabi niya magshower lang siya and then we'll go somewhere! Akala ko naman sa condo
kami didiretso not here!
Gods. Baka napu-poop na yun kaya bigla na lang akong iniwan dito. Where should I
go? Find his room? E left me nga dito. Should I go to the living room? That's the
safest bet pero boring. Ayoko namang maghintay dito. Nakakangalay.
I looked around and saw an open door. I walked towards it and take a peek. Ahh.
Garden.
I went outside and took in everything. Their garden is to die for! It's huge! Ang
daming flower beds and alam mong alagang-alaga siya. There's even a little
waterfalls-oh, damn it. It's a man-made cascade.
"You must be Louisse."
I jumped in surprise. I looked over my shoulder to see who was talking to me.
Oh my gods. Just one look and I know I'm looking at Kade's
mother. Kade got most of his father's facial features but he got his mom's smile
and her bone structure.
She looked younger than what I expected. But then I remembered she was a minor when
she first got married to the architect. She looked so beautiful in her simple white
shirt. There's a grey blanket placed over her lap.
She's sitting in a wheelchair. Hindi ko siguro siya napansin kanina and I just
walked past her. Stupid Louisse.
"Yes po. It's nice to meet you, uhh, tita." Shit. I don't know what to call her!
Mrs Ongpauco? But the legal wife was River's mom, right? I don't even know her
name!
Kade's gonna pay for this. He didn't tell me his mom would be here! Kaya niya ba
ako dinala dito para ma-ambush interview ng mom niya?
And why didn't he even tell me her name before? Gods. He's so gonna get it from me
later.
"I'm Eleanor Locsin, Cascade's mother," she said with a smile. "Have a seat." She
pointed at the wooden chairs.
Wala nang kawala. I nodded and took a seat. "How are you po?"
"Okay naman. Medyo mahina pa," she answered with a smile. "Kayo, kamusta na kayo ng
anak ko?"
Oh gods. "Uhm, we're okay po."
Her smile widenend. "Matagal na kitang gusting ma-meet. Kaso alam naman natin ang
mga nangyari nung nakaraan."
Wait. She knows?
"I'm glad nandiyan ka para sa panganay ko. He needs someone to take care of him."
I just smiled at her. I can't help but feel awkward at this ambush interview. My
brain just won't work!
"I know you know the family secret, Louisse. Naikwento ka na sa akin ng anak ko."
My eyes
widened. "Talaga po?" I blinked. Why? How?
"Tinamaan siya ng husto sa'yo e."
"Oh." Wait. Anong connect?
"Sobrang saya ko nung nagsabi siya sa akin. First time mag open-up ng panganay ko
nun about sa babae. Babaeng mahal niya pa." I watched her play with her hands. She
seemed jumpy. "Masaya ako kasi sa wakas, may makakaintindi na din sa kanya at
maagang mag-aalaga. Maaga kasi yung lumaki si Cascade. He had to. Hindi niya
kasundo yung mga adoptive parents niya."
I stilled as I listen to her ramblings."Adoptive parents?" I can't help but ask.
"Kapatid ni Enrico at ang asawa niya. Para maging legal na Ongpauco, kailangan ng
magkakapatid na ampunin ng mga uncles nila," she answered patiently.
"What?" I didn't know this part!
"Ang alam sa labas magpipinsan sila diba? Para masuportahan yung alibi nay un,
kailangan ng katibayan. PIna-adopt ang mga anak ko."
I frowned. "Pumayag po kayo sa ganung set-up?"
"Wala naman akong magagawa. Hindi naman ako nakapagtapos. Wala akong alam sa mga
ganung bagay. Ganda lang ang meron ako. Tignan mo, iniwan pa rin."
"But the architect still came back for you."
Miss Eleanor laughed. "Because nobody wanted to get him back. Ako lang." My eyes
widened when she leaned close to me. "Enough about me. Kailangan mo malaman to bago
ka balikan ni Cascade," she said, now whispering.
"Bakit po?" I whispered back.
"Para hindi mo na siya iwanan. Para alam mo kung anong klaseng tao ang papakawalan
mo kung uulitin mo siyang iwanan."
My eyes widened even more. "No offense po pero-"
"Shh. Makinig ka." Okaaay. "Lumaki
siya ng mag-isa lang. Late na sila naging magkakasundo nina River lalo na si Lake,
kawawang bata iyon." She shook her head. Huh?
"Tinuring silang outsider ng mga iba nilang pinsan. Kaya sila-sila ring
magkakapatid sa tatay ang magkalapit."
"And you're telling me this because?" I asked, a little annoyed. Something tells me
that learning about these things through her isn't right. It feels like talking
behind Kade's back.
"Kasi marami na siyang pinagdaanan bilang kuya nila. Rejected silang lahat ng mga
Ongpauco. Palabas ang lahat na tanggap sila. Pero sa loob outsider ang turing sa
kanila. Oras na para maging masaya siya ng panganay ko. Oras na para malaman niya
na malaki ang halaga niya bilang tao. Hindi siya dapat nire-reject in the first
place."
Ouch. Her weird ramblings were like a slap in the face.
"Naku! Ma'am! Tumakas na naman kayo!" I looked back and saw a woman in pink scrubs
running towards us.
I looked back at Kade's mom. "Nagpahangin lang naman ako, Gaile."
"Pasok na po tayo, Ma'am Eleanor. Iinom ka pa ng gamot mo." The woman looked at me
and gave me a polite smile. "Good afternoon po, Miss."
"Good afternoon. Nurse po kayo ni Miss Eleanor?"
She nodded as she walked behind Miss Eleanor's back. "Opo."
"Ano ka ba, Louisse! Tita Eleanor na lang. Parang ibang tao yung Miss Eleanor!"
Kade's mom admonished me.
I bit my lip and nodded. "Okay po."
Nurse Gaile said before pushing Tita Eleanor's wheelchair. "Sige po. Mauna na po
kami sa loob."
I watched them get inside before I let out a sigh. That was one weird encounter. It
was my first time to meet my special someone's mother. And I sucked at it.
"I see you've met my mom." I whirled around and saw a fresh-from-shower Kade
standing where her mom's wheelchair was parked.
"Sinadya mo ba 'yun?" I asked, my eyes squinted at him.
He shook his head. "What? No. I didn't even know she's allowed to roam around the
house." I watched him look at their house. I can't read him.
"Nurse Gaile said she sneaked out," I said.
"Typical mom behavior." Kade smirked before he returned his eyes at me. "Anyway,
did she say something to you?" he asked, his tone too light. "Sometimes she says
things that doesn't make sense. "
I shook my head. "Is it because of the suicide attempt?"
"Nah. She's been like that before. She had a post partum depression after she gave
birth to Ozi."
"Oh." So that explains the weird ramblings and her non-answer answers.
Kde shrugged. "Yeah," he's downplaying this. Why? I don't get it. I know he's not
ashamed of his mom. Maybe he's just protecting her that's why he won't talk about
her... until now that I just met her.
I can feel he's uncomfortable. Maybe it's not the right time to talk about this.
Madami pa naman kaming time.
I cleared my throat. "Okay. Saan na tayo now?" I asked, trying to change the
subject.
"We'll just eat lunch here and then we're gonna look for Yap," he answered, his
voice turned low and serious.
I frowned at the sudden change of his mood. "Why?"
"We're going to convince him to tell us his side of the story."
=================
Chapter 43: Dirty Little Secret
Chapter 43
Dirty Little Secret
"Are you fucking serious right now?" I hissed at him as we made our way inside our
old university.
Kade looked over his shoulder and met my glare. "What?" he asked, his tone
innocent.
"Are you saying Yap's here? In DLU?" I asked, still glaring at him.
Kade shrugged. "Yeah. I heard he's staying at the athletic dorms."
The nerve of this guy! He made me go with him in his home in Makati to take a
shower tapos nandito lang pala si Yap sa DLU?! I thought he was staying around
Makati, too!
"Kade, our apartment is just in front!" I said, pointing at the direction where our
apartment building is. "And your building is just three blocks away!" I shook my
head in irritation. There's no other reason for him to bring me there. He just
really want me to meet his mom without a heads-up! I hate those kinds of surprises!
He could've just fetched me after he took his shower, nasa tapat lang ng apartment
building yung old uni namin.
I pushed his chest with both hands. "You set me up, you little shit. You brought me
to your house in Makati to meet your mom!"
Kade frowned. "Do you hate meeting my mom? Is that why you're upset?" he asked. He
sounded offended.
WHAT?! I didn't say that!

"No! That's not what I said. My point it, I hate being unprepared!" I said to him
straight to end his confusion. "My gods, I must've looked stupid earlier. I can't
remember half the things I said to your mom." Shiz. Naalala ko na naman na wala
akong preno kanina! I can't remember yung mga sagot ko. All I know is
that I had no filter... yata. "Nakakahiya! It was my first time to meet my-
someone's mother!"
Of course, Kade caught my slip. Well, ano ko nga ba si Kade? He's my ex... We
haven't cleared up what we really are now.
I really hate DTRs.
Kade arched an eyebrow. "Just 'someone?' I'm still just 'someone?'" His tone was
more amused than annoyed.
I looked away from him. "Ugh, no. You know that you're not."
"I don't." Kade shrugged, acting confused. "I'm your what, Salazar?"
I glared at him again. I can't answer that question! Even though we have something
special, nakakahiyang mag-assume and manggaling sakin!
"You're my..." I stalled.
"Your what?" he asked, not giving up. Matatagalan lang kami dito!
I sighed, surrendering. "You're my Ongpauco, okay?" I finally answered. I took his

hand and dragged him. We need to get a move on. "C'mon! Let's find Yap!"
Kade draped his arm around my shoulder. "I like that answer," he whispered. I
turned to him and smiled. "Just so you know, I was supposed to do my laundry
yesterday. But I got sidetracked." He flashed a boyish grin.
"Sidetracked by alcohol," I deadpanned.
"That won't happen again, babe."
"Good. Because you're not a cute drunk." I stuck my tongue out. He just grinned and
squeezed the ever loving fuck out of my shoulder. Kainis!
***
"Anong ginagawa niyo dito?" Yap hissed the moment he saw me and Kade standing
outside his dorm room. He was just wearing a blue shirt and black basketball
shorts. It looks like just woke up, too.
Shit. Hindi maganda makipag-usap sa bagong gising.
He's clearly not in a holly mood right now. Teka, kalian ba siya naging jolly when
he's around us? For the little time we spent with him nung nahuli niya si Asher
with me, he was mad at us too.
I turned to Kade and saw him stared back at his brother. "I want to know the truth
from you," he said evenly.
"I don't have anything to say to you," Yap countered right back. This won't be
easy.
I looked back at Yap and decided to chime in. Two heads are better than one, right?
"Look, Yap. We need to know your story. Baka ikaw lang sagot sa problema namin sa
daddy niy-kay architect." Shit. I slipped.
Yap didn't correct me. He shook his head, irritated. "Hindi ba't sinabi ko na sa
inyo nung nakaraan, huwag niyo akong isali sa drama niyo?"
Drama? Is he stupid? Kung drama lang namin to, we won't drag anyone in it. But it's
not. This is about the other Ongpauco kids and their mothers.
Good gods, just thinking about Bay and Ocean makes my heart squeeze and it squeezed
tighter at the memory of Tita Eleanor's pale face.
"Then you shouldn't have studied here!" I shot back. "You're siblings are here.
Dapat handa kang makilala anytime. You should have known that." Kade held my hands
tightly. I'm not sure if it's a sign of support or a sign for me to stop.
Yap scoffed. "Ano namang maitutulong ko? Nananahimik ako!" He paused for a second
and took a deep breath to calm himself. "I'm just studying here because I'm waiting
for Asher and this is the only university who gave me a full-ride scholarship." Yap
leaned his face close to me but Kade gently pulled me to his back.
"I'm not here because I wanted to be close them. I'm here because I don't mooch of
my parents."
Ouch. If that is not an insult, then I don't know what is. Gago.
"There are kids involved here, Yap. This is not just about us," Kade finally opened
his mouth again. He looked calm and collected. But I know he's not. I know when he
started to act too calm in debates, badtrip na siya.
"He's right," I chimed in. These two need a buffer and that's why I'm here for.
"Ano namang connection ko?" Storm asked, still confused at his role. Yes, I know he
thinks this isn't his obligation but they're still his siblings.
Kade answered him in the same calm and collected tone. "I need to know more about
you. Why did he keep you in the dark? Why were you kept from us? What the hell is
your story? Who's your mother?"
Yap visibly stilled but he recovered immediately. Who the heck is his mom?
"And then what? What will you do with the truth? Blackmail your dad with it?" he
asked, he's clearly more annoyed at the idea.
"That's the plan," Kade answered honestly.
Yap went quiet for a minute to think. "Ano bang gusto niyang mangyari?"
Kade looked away from him and heaved a deep sigh. "He wants me to pursue his CFO's
daughter. He wants me to leave Louisse alone... and I can't do that."
Oh my gods. I didn't expect the last bit.
Yap looked more surprised at Kade's admission. "If you refuse him, what will
happen?"
Kade put his hands on his pockets and shrugged. "He will disown us. He will take
our trust funds and freeze our bank accounts."
"Don't
you think maybe it's time you sacrifice for your family?" he asked, cryptic. What
does that mean?
Kade didn't take his bait. So I answered his question for Kade. "Do you think the
architect will stop with Kade? He has younger siblings! He will do the same with
them, Yap. He needs to stop and you're the only person who can help us," I reasoned
with him as calm as I can.
Be diplomatic, L, even though he's getting in your nerves. You need him.
"I have little sisters and a sick mother, Yap." Kade paused. "We can't afford to
lose our money."
Yap looked at him for what seemed like a full minute before he nodded in defeat.
"Fine. Tutulong ako pero hindi dahil sa inyong dalawa. Para sa mga batang kapatid
mo to." He took a step back and opened the door wider and motioned for us to get
in. "Pasok."
Kade and I followed him inside his room. Wow, for a guy's room ang linis dito ha.
There's two bunk beds and four study tables. There's a decent-size TV on top of
wooden cabinet. There are food supplies, pile of papers, folders and other man
toys.
"Tinawagan niyo na ba si Asher?" he asked as he sat on, what I assume, his bed.
Shiz. He wouldn't like my answer. I didn't have the time to talk to Asher because
of what happened for the past three days. I went to the hospital to take care of
dad, Jamie's break-down because of her broken hymen and a drunk Kade.
Fuck. Nakaka-guilty na I forgot about Asher's condition in Singapore.
"Uhh, not yet," I answered reluctantly as we sat down on the mono block chairs.
Yap shook his head in disgust. "Kailan niyo pa
siya balak tawagan?" he started to berate us. "Napaka simpleng pabor hindi niyo
maga-"
"I'm planning to book a flight to Singapore. We're gonna visit her," Kade
interrupted him.
Wait. What? "We do?" I asked, confused.
Kade nodded. "Yeah. It was supposed to be a surprise for you and Asher but he's
about to rip us a new one that's why I said it."
I heard Yap tsk-ed. "Just make sure pagkatapos nito, pupuntahan niyo talaga si
Asher."
"Of course." I nodded eagerly. "I'll even call her later," I offered to assure him.
"Don't tell her the surprise," Kade said to me with a slight grin. I nodded in
agreement. Of course I wanted to surprise Asher too. I missed her and her potty-
mouth. I'm worried about her too. And I feel like shit that I haven't called her
yet.
"Okay... So what's the plan, Yap?" I asked, getting to the point. Mahirap na maiba
pa ang usapan.
Yap sat up straight. "You don't need to know more about me." Huh? What the heck
does that mean? "Pero oo, isa nga akong Ongpauco. Halata naman sa pangalan ko
diba?" He let out a humorless laugh.
Yeah, we figured. The name Storm is related to water and his surname is Ongpauco.
"Is that why you go by the name 'Yap?'" I asked, squinting my eyes at him to get a
better look.
He nodded his head. "Yup. Yun lang yung walang bahid ni architect."
"Who's your mother?" Kade asked all of a sudden which made Yap freeze for a second.
He shook his head. "Hindi niyo na kailangan malaman kung sino siya," he answered.
Bakit ba ang cryptic ng mga sagot niya? Is there a bigger truth behind his
identity?
Is their father hiding more secrets darker than Yap's?
"If we don't know facts about you, how can we blackmail him?" Kade asked, his tone
sounded really irritated. He's not masking it now.
Yap stood up and started to pace. "Sabihan niyo lang ako kung kalian kayo
makikipag-usap sa kanya, I'll go with you." Kade and I just watched him.
"Sigurado ka?" I asked. Just like that? Kanina it doesn't seem like he's going to
agree. It's a complete 360.
A tip of Yap's lips lifted and turned into a smirk. "Oo, makita lang ako nun kasama
kayo, enough na blackmail na sa kanya yun."
"Why?"I asked again.
"Basta."
I heard Kade sighed in exasperation. I looked at him and reached for his hand. He
gave it to me and I squeezed it to comfort him. "I hate this mystery-shit you're
going for," Kade said to Yap.
Yap stopped his pacing and looked down at us. "This is the only way I'll help you,
Cascade. Suck it up."
Kade stood up and leveled his eyes with Yap. "Fine. Let's do it now," he said to
Yap. "We wouldn't want for you to change your mind, right?" he asked, his tone
filled with sarcasm.
That was my cue to stand up and to hold Kade's hand again. His sarcastic tone is
quite alarming, honestly.
"Fine by me," he said after giving us a careless shrug.
***
The three of us were quiet when reached Architect Enrico Ongpauco's home in Ayala
Alabang. The tension from the three of us worsened when I decided to take a seat on
the backseat. Yap was about to enter the shotgun seat when Kade demanded for me to
sit beside him.
Yap didn't say anything. He just
open the door at the backseat and jumped in. I had to run to the shotgun seat when
I climbed down from the backseat.
It was a disaster. Thank the gods it wasn't rush hour when we left Taft. Hindi kami
na stuck sa traffic at mabilis na nakapunta dito sa house ni asshole architect.
"Are you guys ready?" I asked as I looked out of the window and admired the tall
black fences and the huge modern house behind it. Shit. We're really here. We're
really in front of their father's house.
"As ready as I'll ever be," Kade muttered beside me.
I looked back at him and smiled. "We'll get through this."
"Unscathed, I hope," Yap said before opening the backseat door and climbing down.
We followed him until we reached the huge gate. Kade pressed the doorbell/speaker
thing and talked to it. "Tell dad, it's Cascade. I'm here with Louisse and Storm."
I gasped when I heard him use our names. Fuck. I feel like we're spies and we just
committed a mistake. We gave just gave out our identities!
I turned slightly and eyed Yap beside me. He's standing straight and he's shoulders
are too tensed. We're all nervous. I hope we really survive going inside Architect
Antichrist's house.
The gates opened and we were graciously greeted by two old maids. They guided us
inside the house. It took all of my strength not to gawk out the beauty of this
modern home.
No wonder Architect Antichrist is filthy rich. He's good at what he does. May
kakayanan talagang mag-anak ng walo!
Wait a minute. Eight lang kaya talaga sila? Storm included.
The two old maids guided us until we reached
what looked like an office. They made us sit down on the most comfortable looking
chairs that I have ever seen. Before they left, they asked us if we wanted
something to drink or eat. The three of us begged off.
Mahirap na. We're at the lion's den.
"I see my two sons have met." We all sat up straight when we heard the architect's
voice. My eyes watched his every move as he walked inside his office. "And you also
brought your girlfriend." My eyes met his and tried my hardest not to look away.
He turned his eyes on Kade. "I can see why you're hell-bent on dating her." He
smiled at me when he looked back and it almost made me cringe.
"Stop staring at her," Kade said, his tone dead calm.
Shit.
The Architect Antichrist looked away from me and turned his attention to his sons.
"What brings the three of you here?" he asked as he leaned back on his throne-
looking office chair.
"I want you to stop with all these blackmail bullshit, dad," Kade answered without
hesitation. I marveled at his conviction and his straight-forwardness.
His dad tilted his head to the said. "Why?" he asked, clearly amused.
Why the heck is he amused? Ano tingin niya sa mga anak niya? Play-things? Paper
dolls? Toys na pwede niyang paglaruan anytime he gets bored?
I looked at Kade and saw his jaw clenched. "Because you have done enough, dad. You
screwed all of us enough. You need to stop," he answered, almost like he's
growling. You can almost see the anger radiating off his body.
His father frowned. "And if I don't stop, what will you do, my dear son?" he asked,
clearly
baiting Kade.
"Your dirty little secret comes out," Yap butted in just in time, referring to
himself. I don't know how to feel about that. I mean, calling yourself a 'dirty
little secret.'
My breath hitched the moment their eyes met. I looked at the three Ongpaucos inside
the four walls of this room. They all looked like they came from the same mold. I
can't believe I missed it when I first met Yap. Maybe because it was dark at the
house party? Or maybe it was too far-fetched for my mind to consider it.
My gods. They all have the same hooded eyes.
They got their father's facial features. But seeing Tita Eleanor and Tita Aina, I
can say River, Kade and other Ongpauco kids still have little things they got from
their moms. Skin tone, bone structures, little quirks. Someone is more Chinese
looking, someone is more mestizo-looking.
"Okay," the architect said all of a sudden.
"Okay, what?" Kade asked, confused.
His dad shrugged. "Okay, I'll stop meddling with your lives."
"Just like that?" I asked him, skeptic.
He nodded. "Yes, just like that."
"And you're not going to take all their money?" Yap asked.
"No," the architect asshole confirmed.
I let out a huge sigh of relief. Tangina. Just like that. I though he's gonna put
up a fight pa or he's gonna make new threats. Thank gods. What just happened is a
watered-down version of what I expected to happen.
Yap sighed. "Good." He clapped his hands and stood up from his chair. "My job is
done here." He was about to walk away when suddenly we heard new voices.
"What the hell is going

on here?" A familiar loud voice asked.
All of us whipped our heads back and looked at the newcomers. River and Lake are
here. They're standing at the same room with their missing half-brother and they
don't even know it.
"Who's this guy?" River asked nodding at Yap, who's no w frozen on his feet.
"He's your brother," the architect answered. I looked back at him and he's now
reading blueprints! Walang pakialam around here. Hindi niya ba nage-gets na turning
point ito sa lives of his four sons?!
What an asshole.
"What the fuck, dude? Anong ginagawa nila dito?" I heard Yap's feral snarl.
Oh shit. This is not good.
"Reinforcements," Kade answered.
"Pucha. Ang usapan walang ibang makakaalam," Yap hissed at Kade before storming out
of the office.
"Yap! Wait!" I called him out. Kade was about to go after Yap when I stopped him.
"Stay here. I'll go after him. You explain everything to your brothers."
I didn't give him a chance to response. I left him there and ran after Yap. I
caught up with him just as he stepped out of the front door.
"Wait up, Yap! Hey!" I called him.
He stopped and snarled at me. "Ano?!"
I didn't answer him immediately because I was having a hard time to breathe. Wala
lang sa kanya yung nilakad niya? Damn these athletes. Why am I surrounded with
athletes?
I startled when he suddenly exploded in my face. "Pucha naman, Louisse. Napaka

simpleng instructions hindi niyo kayang sundin!"
"Hey, wala din akong alam!" I said raising my palms in surrender. "Pero Yap, you
have to understand Kade. Wala siyang choice but to call his brothers. He has no
idea what's gonna happen next kaya siguro he called for reinforcements," I
explained, talking some sense into his head.
"A promise is a promise," he shot back.
I sighed. "I know. But when it comes to his family, Kade will do everything. Future
ng mga kapatid niya nakasalalay dito. Think of all the things na pwedeng mawala kay
Bay and Ozi. Their just kids! May sakit pa yung mom niya."
He got quiet for a while. Thinking of the words I just said. I hoped it penetrated
his thick skull. Mahirap na ang magkagulo sila now that the other two know about
him.
"I get it." Yap sighed in defeat. "But a heads-up would've been nice."
I nodded in agreement. I was shocked too by Lake and River's entrance. "Yeah. That
guy can really be spontaneous when he wants to."
He shook his head and waved his hand in dismissal. "Sige na. Tawagin mo na 'yun.
Hindi ko alam pauwi."
I chuckled at his admission. "Okay. Don't go anywhere." I twirled around and almost
bumped into River. What is he doing here?
"Uhh... Storm, right?" he said, looking at Yap.
"Yap."
"I'm River." He gave Yap a single nod. "Dad asked for you stay. The douchebag said
he wants to talk to you."
I almost laughed they way River refer to their father. Yap almost grinned. He just
stopped when he caught himself.
"I'll pass." He shook his head.
Ha! Not today, Satan.
Yap looked back at me. "Hintayin ko na kayo sa kotse." I gave him a nod.
River and I watched him open the gates and walk outside.
"Hey, Louisse," River greeted me.
I looked back at him and almost gave him shit for the way he looked. He's miserable
and it's because of Jamie and their drama.
"What's up, virginator?" I teased him.
River just stared me, not taking my bait.
=================
Chapter 44: Not Confused
Chapter 44
Not Confused
"That's one heck of a day," I said as Kade parked his truck in front of our
apartment building.
I think what's more tiring was over-thinking the whole thing, thinking of worst
case scenarios and convincing Yap to help us with their than the actual meeting
with their douchebag father. It really was a watered-down version of what I
expected to happen. Architect Antichrist was so chill about it when all of us were
so tensed!
And gods, don't even let me start on Yap. That guy, Storm Yap-Ongpauco, is a
fucking mystery. I can't read him. I can't even imagine how he and Asher became
best of friends! Asher is so loud and open and he's too reserved and mysterious.
They're so different. Opposites, even.
Unbuckling my seatbelt, I turned my head to look at him. I instantly melted at the

warm look he's giving me. "Thank you for being there with me," he said, making me
feel fuzzy.
I beamed at him. "Well, that's just a part of being your Salazar."
Kade's eyebrows raised in surprise. "Hmmm... My Salazar." He grinned. "I like it."
I felt myself blush. Shiz. High school lang? "Sige na. I gotta go." I look away
from him and reached for the car door's lock switch. "I'm gonna call Asher pa," I
reasoned pa.
"Why don't we call her now with me?" I heard him ask making me look back at him.
I'm not as rich as him! I'll try to call her number in Facetime, baka sakaling
she's using an iPhone pa rin. "It's expensive!" I said.
He handed me his phone. "Call her using my phone,"
he said, his tone nonchalant.
Ugh. "Fine. Whatever." I took his phone. "Password?" I asked, looking down on his
phone, ready to type whatever his password is.
"May 6. 0506." Oh! That's Jamie's birthday ha! That is so weird.
I looked up at him and smiled. "Jamie's birthday?" I asked with a teasing tone.
He nodded. "It was also the date we became official, remember?" He even arched an
eyebrow when he asked.
Oh shit.
How could I forget?! There was so many things that happened on that day five months
ago. Gods. Am I being senile now?
I thought guy-thing lang yung nakakalimot when it comes to important dates. I can't
believe I'm the who forgot it.
I felt myself blush once again. But this time, because of embarrassment and not
kilig. "Oh. Sorry," I squeaked before looking down on his phone and typing his
password.
Nakakahiya. Shiz. How could I forget that date? That was our anniversary! Could I
just turn into ashes right now? Please? The earth won't swallow me naman since I'm
inside his truck.
I looked for Asher's number in his contacts na lang to distract myself from the
heat of his stare. I pressed on the loudspeaker button after dialing her number.
She answered on the third ring. "Hello. Who's this?" Her voice sounded husky.
Parang bagong gising. Or kakagising lang.
I smiled and greeted her. "Hi, Asher! This is Louisse!"
I heard her squeal. "Oh! Friendly friend! Kumusta na?" she asked excitedly. It's
been like, weeks since we talked!
Nakakamiss siya! The way she talks and her smile, gods. I wanna see her na! I hope
Kade will really book us a flight in Singapore. I wanna hug my girl. I missed her
to bits.
"Ikaw ang kumusta?" I returned her question. I remembered Yap and his words. I need
to be a friend to Asher. "Are you okay now? We just learned about your condition a
few days ago through Yap."
I heard her sigh. "Oo nga. Sinabi sakin ni Yappie. Sira talaga yun!" And then she
squealed again. "Anyway, chika minute! Nakwento sakin ni Yap na nakita niya kayo ni
Kade!" she exclaimed, the fangirl she was.
I looked at Kade and raised an eyebrow at him. He's just smiling. "So, alam mo na
rin na we know he's Kade's half-brother?" I asked suspiciously.
"Yup," she asnswered without a beat.
I squinted my eyes on Kade's phone, as if I was looking directly in Asher's eyes.

"And you didn't tell us because..." I trailed off.
I heard her chuckle. "Yes and you guys won't hold it against me dahil best friend
ko siya," she countered confidently. She has a point there and it's not her secret
to tell. "So, huwag nang chumange topic! Style mo bulok, Louisse!" she suddenly
yelled. I looked back to Kade and he was shaking his head but still smiling. "Ano
na? Kayo na ulit? Okay na kayo?" I heard Asher asked through the phone.
Kahit kalian. So tsismosa.
I pouted. How will I answer this question? Wait a minute, hindi naman pwedeng ako
lang sasagot. "I don't know. Why don't you ask him?" I asked her.
Kade leaned to his phone. "Hey, Asher," he greeted with a grin. As if Asher can see
it.
And all hell broke loose...
Asher gasped. "MOTHERFUCKER! MAGKASAMA KAYO!!!"
she shouted loudly. Thank gods she's on speaker phone! I would've been deaf now if
I was wearing earphones or just using the handset mode.
"Yeah. This is his number," I confirmed, smugly.
I heard more incoherent squealing from her. She's such a riot!
"OH MY! WHAT THE FROG!!! MY SHIP IS SAILING!!!!!!!!!!" Asher shrieked again. I
can't help but miss her more. Lalo na yung times when she teases us in class nung
first sem last year.
"Hey! Calm down, you weirdo!" I said to her. Kade and I exchange looks and laughed
at our number one fangirl.
"I GOT NO CHILL! LADERS HAVE NO CHILL!" she yelled. I rolled my eyes. Nako, here we
go again. "Wait! Lade ba? LouKade? Laisse? SHIT! I don't care! My wrecked ship has
been repaired and it's sailing again!" she blabbed breathlessly.
Hay nako. How am I gonna break Asher's bubble? Hindi pa kami ni Kade ulit and we're
just taking things slow.
"We're still not together pa. We're taking it slow," Kade answered for us, taking
the words out of my mouth.
"Oh," Asher said. Well, that shut her up.
Kade and I both laughed at her disappointment. "I told you, calm down," I teased
her.
I heard her growl. "Shit! Mas masakit kayo sa ulo kesa sa balikat ko!" she huffed,
annoyed.
Speaking of her rotator cuff... "Oi, Asher. What's up with your rotator cuff?" I
asked, trying to change the subject. It's time to check up on her. That's the real
purpose why we called her. We need to know if she's okay now or what else we should
know about her condition.
She harrumphed. "Tseh! Bahala kayo! Tawagan niyo na lang ulit ako
kapag kayo na ulit!" she exclaimed in disappointment.
I gaped at Kade's phone. "Wait, Asher!" I yelled at her.
"Bye, confused lovebirds!" she yelled back.
And the line was dropped.
"I guess, Asher's fine," Kade said with a light chuckle.
I nodded. "Yep. She's fine... in her own way." In her manic-depressive way.
Anyway, time to go home na. I'm starving and my bed's calling my body already. Kade
needs to rest too. He had a hangover kanina and he needs to check up on his little
sisters and his ill mom.
I shoved his phone back to him. "I gotta go now. Thanks for taking me home," I
said., smiling at him.
"Wait. We gotta show something to Asher," he said with a mischievous grin.
Good gods, it was hot.
"C'mere. Let's make her crazier." He took his phone from my hand and his free hand
grabbed my head, his hand on the back of my neck.
He snapped a photo of us, him giving me a big kiss on my left cheek. It left me
stunned and I pretty much just watched him upload the photo on Instagram.
Shiz. Wala akong nagawa. My eyes were wide in the photo and my lips were apart. I
was clearly surprised. Who wouldn't?
"At AshFlo, I'm not confused," he said as he typed on his phone. "There! Posted!"
He looked at me again grinned.
We're not yet back together but he just made us Instagram official.
***
Five days ago, masasabi kong I'm still a very sane person. But not today. Not
today. My gods.
"Namumukhaan kita," I heard papa said to Kade after I introduced them to each
other. The introduction went smoothly naman. They even shook hands!
"I
don't think we have met before, sir," Kade answered after a beat.
Yeah and he would've told me that before because he had seen papa before. Papa was
just sleeping that time.
Papa looked at me. "Are you sure he's just your friend?" he asked.
I fought the urge to run away from them right then and there. Good gods! Papa is
grilling us and we just got here not two minutes ago!
Shiz. How did Papa managed to made me bring Cascade here? Ang daldal kasi ni mama.
She had to tell him that there's a a guy who went with me when he was in a medical-
induced coma.
"Yes, papa. We're just friends." For now. I didn't tell him that though.
Papa squinted his eyed at me before looking away and calling me. "Babes! Paabot ng
phone ko, please."
Mama went to him and gave him his phone. I took the opportunity to drag Kade to the
sofa. Mas okay na magkalayo sila, just in case lang naman.
"Wait. Stay there," papa said. Kade stopped immediately and dragged me back in
place.
"There!" I heard papa exclaimed as he eyed his phone. He read something on his
phone out loud. "At AshFlo, I'm not confused."
My eyes widened. "Holy shiz, papa! You're stalking me on Instagram?!" I asked,

horrified.
OH MY GODS.
"Of course," he said, like it's so obvious. "How am I gonna track you if I don't?
Wala ka na sa puder ko, Louisse."
I rolled my eyes at him, irritated. Good gods. Ang hirap if you have a techie
father. Gods! I should've untagged that photo from my Instagram account!
"So? Care to explain this?" I heard him asked.
I looked at mama and wordlessly asked

for help. She just grinned at me. She's enjoying this!
"Our friend, Asher, was teasing us. She said that Louisse and I are confused. I'm
just telling her that I'm not."
Papa looked at me. "So, nagsisinungaling ka kanina?" he asked, his tone suspicious.
"No." Technically.
Papa's brows furrowed. "Ano kayo ngayon? Dating?" he asked me.
I shrugged. "We haven't talked about it yet, papa." And please stay out of it.
"You're not courting my daughter?" He's asking Cascade now.
"He was but something came up," I butted in.
"Ano yun?"
"You," I answered him honestly. "I was a mess, diba?" I added vaguely. They didn't
need to know about our pregnancy scare. Papa will kill us both!
"Right." Papa heaved a huge sigh.
"Sir, I would like to ask your permission to date your daughter," Kade said out of
the blue.
My head snapped to his direction. "Hey!" Oh my gods! What was he thinking?! Hindi
siya papayagan niyan! And he doesn't need my father's permission!
I AM MY OWN WOMAN, DAMNIT.
Papa smirked before looking at me. Shit. Sabi ko na. He's gonna decline and he's
gonna gloat. "That depends on Louisse. If she agrees to meet up with her siblings,
I will give you my permission."
My eyes budged. Seriously?! "What the hell, papa?"
"Well, he asked." He shrugged carelessly. "That's my condition." He shook his head,

changing his mind. He eyed Kade again. "Well, no. She needs to be home after your
date. 12AM sharp. Louisse will call us at dapat makausap ko both Kim and Jamie."
Kade nodded. "I accept, sir."
"I'm not agreeing to anything yet!" I exclaimed in irritation.
Papa let out a chuckle. "The ball's in your court, bubu."
I glared at him. "Ugh." He's testing me. He knows I don't want to meet my half-
siblings first. And for me to agree to this shows how much I like/love Kade!
Ayoko din namang mag-doubt si Kade with what I feel for him. I'm not confused with
my feelings. I love him but it's best for us to take things slow. We moved too fast
before and looked what it did to us.
But maybe now's the time to meet my half-sibs, too. I need to stop running away. I
already faced my problems with my parents and Kade. It's high-time to meet up with
my half-sibs.
After taking a deep breath, I looked at my father and nodded. "I agree."
For Kade, I will agree to my father's whim.
=================
Chapter 45: Last Time
Chapter 45
Last Time
From: Ivanna Salazar
Hi! Alvin and I are here na po. =)
Oh, shit. Late na ako!
I checked the time on my phone and gasped. Ang aga naman nila! Ang usapan, 3PM!
2:30 PM palang!
Good gods. I'm not even finished braiding my hair!
I typed my reply. Good. I'm on my way there.

Liar, liar pants on fire. You haven't even left your room!
"Shit. I can't be late. I don't want to leave a bad first impression," I muttered
after dropping my phone on my sling bag. I finished braiding my hair and spritzed
myself with my perfume.
"Okay. I'm ready to go."
***
"Holy tacos! I forgot my keys!" I growled to myself after rummaging my bag and my
pockets for my keys. Pero wala. I think I left it on my dresser.
Shit. I need to go back to the apartment pa. I'm so freaking tired na from all that
running.
"Need a lift?" I heard a familiar male voice ask.
I whirled around and saw Kade, leaning on his truck. How come I didn't notice him
standing there? His car was parked in front of mine!
"You're a fucking lifesaver," I said to him. I ran to the front passenger side of
his truck and opened it. I climbed up and sat on the shotgun seat.
"I thought you're meeting them 3 in the afternoon? You're late na," he asked. I got
settled on his car and buckled my seat belt.
Don't I know it. "No shit, Sherlock," I snapped in irritation.
"Just shut up and drive!" I whined after seeing it's already 2: 38PM.
"Aight. Your wish is my command," he answered calmly.

I immediately felt like shit. Here he is, saving my ass from being late and I'm
snapping at him.
I sighed and tuned to look at him."Sorry for snapping at you. I'm just so...
rattled."
He started driving. "Yeah, I can tell."
I can't read him. I don't know if he's made or he just really gets me. I feel like
explaining my grouchiness. "I'm hungry because I haven't eaten anything yet. I woke
up late." I let out a loud sigh. "Jamie and Kim saw your Instagram post last night
and they flipped. They gave me shit for it until the wee hours," I blabbed
breathlessly.
Kade briefly looked at me before turning his head back to the road. "They don't
want us to get back together?" he asked. He sounded troubled. "Or get along, at
least?"
I touched his hand on the stick shift. "Kim was okay with it. She just felt like
they were the last to know. Jamie was mad." I shrugged and gave him a tight-lipped
smile. "She still hates you for dating Sabrina."
"I take it you corrected her?" he asked without turning to me. But I can see the
way his jaw clenched.
"I did. I just didn't tell them everything."
"Why?" he asked. This time he turned to look at me. Maybe because we just stopped
into a red light.
Kade flipped his hand and intertwined our fingers. I squeezed his hand. "Because
it's not my secret to tell and Kim doesn't know about your family secret," I told
him with a gentle smile.
It's
not really my secret. He trusted me with it. I won't break his trust. Not even for
my best friends. Isa pa, Jamie will eventually ;learn about it when River tells her
about Yap.
"What did you tell them exactly?" he asked as he looked back to the road and
continued driving.
I turned my head back to the road. "I told them... We have talked about things and
we're okay. We're taking things slow." I basically repeated to them a filtered
version of what transpired with Kade and I for the last few weeks.
"Yeah. What else?"
"And that you didn't choose Sabrina over me. You chose your sisters over me and I'm
okay with that."
"What did they say?"
"Kim said, 'Di ko gets.'" Kade and I both laughed. "Jamie said 'Ayoko na kayong
intidihin! Bawal ako mastress!' and then she walked out on us! That moody girl." I
shook my head. She gets weirder than weird every single day. That's her normal
naman.
"She's grouchy?" Kade asked sarcastically. Well, she's always grouchy when Kade's
around her.
I nodded. "Yup. To think she and River are okay na after that virginity debacle."
"Yeah."
Without asking for his permission, I tinkered on his car stereo. He just let me
pick whatever the hell I want. After picking a song (1D's new song, Steal My Girl),
Kade picked up my hand that's intertwined with his. He kissed the back of it before
placing it on his lap. I squeezed my his leg and smiled at him.
I love this feeling. Ang chill lang kahit na he's driving way past the speed limit.
"I have a question." I heard him ask. I turned to look at him and waited.
"Did you regret losing it
to me?" he asked, throwing a quick glance at me.
Whoa. Where did that come from?
"What? My virginity?" I asked in surprise. He nodded.
I don't need to think of the answer but ang awkward lang. "Uhm, no." I shook my
head as I answered. "I lost it to you and I have no regrets. It was the right time
for me and we're in love naman when we did it."
I watched the tip of his lips lifted. "And horny," he added.
"And I love doing it with you," I teased as my hand on his leg went up slowly.
Kade grabbed my hand and put it back near on his knee. "Salazar, let's stop talking
about things we can't act on right now, okay?"
His frustration made me feel warm and fuzzy. He doesn't want to talk about it. He
wouldn't put me in a sticky situation. I asked him for us to take things slow and
he's honoring it.
I laughed at his frustrated expression and at my about-to-explode feelings. "You're

too easy, Ongpauco," I teased him.
"Hard, too," he muttered which made me laugh even louder.
***
"Are you sure you don't want me to go with you?" Kade asked as he parked his car in
front of Resto Hambriento, where my half-sibs were at.
I smiled at him, grateful for his thoughtfulness. "I have to face this battle
alone," I answered back.
Kade gave me a single nod."I'm just one text away, okay?"
"Thank you." I unbuckled my seat before checking myself on the vanity mirror on his
truck's sun visor. My make-up's good pa naman. No need to retouch.
"I'll drive you home later."
I looked at him before shaking my
head. "You don't have to do that." I can take a cab later. I don't wanna cause him
more trouble. I can handle myself.
Kade just stared at me with an impatient look. "I'm the one who brought you here.
I'll drive you home."
I glowered at him. "Fine, caveman." He just showed me his infamous half-smile half-
smirk. I rolled my eyes at him. "Okay. I gotta go." I unlocked the car door."Thanks
for driving past the speed limit," I said to him, one last time before opening the
front passenger door.
"Wait, babe."
I looked back at him and closed the door. "What?"
"You need this." He pulled me to him and kissed me on my forehead.
"What was that for?" I asked, stunned at his sweet gesture.
"Good-luck kiss," he answered with a boyish grin.
"Why on the forehead?" Diba dapat sa lips?

Smirking, he answered, "Slow, remember?" I rolled my eyes at his arrogance.
"Thank you, though. I needed that."
Kade brushed my left cheek with his knuckles. "They'll love you."
"What if they don't?" I frowned. The nervous flutter of butterflies taking over my
stomach. "I can be awkward... and a bitch."
Kade leveled his eyes with me, his hand sliding to the back of my neck. "If they
don't see past your shit, they're not worth it."
Right there and then, I melted under his gaze and his sweet words. "Thank gods you
saw past my shit."
Kade grinned. "Lucky you." He kissed the tip of my nose before pulling away from
me. "Get your ass out of my car. You're gonna be late."
***
I looked around the resto the moment I got
inside. I noticed two heads turned my way, a teenage girl and a teenage boy. The
girl raised her hand and waved at me. I'm the only one just entered, sila na nga
yun. Why didn't I ask for their Facebook accounts? Edi sana I know their faces.
Well, Alvin's slightly familiar since I saw him before kahit galit lang.
I walked towards them and gave them a tentative smile. The teenage girl, Ivanna, is
sporting a bob-cut that makes her face smaller. She's fair-skinned and it makes her
look dainty. She looks like an angel. She's wearing a floral sundress and a yellow
cardigan. Simple lang.
On the other hand, Alvin looked more tanned and he's taller now. Ang bilis! That
was like months ago lang, right? The thing I won't forget about Alvin's face is
that it's like a carbon-copy of our father's face.
"Hi. Ivanna and Alvin?" I asked, just to make sure...and I don't know what else to
say to them.
The girl nodded and beamed at me. "Hello po!" She has a cute voice too!
I looked at Alvin and he just smiled at me politely. Shit. Siguro he remembered our
first encounter. How do I-What am I gonna do about it?
I cleared my throat and looked at the table. They ordered drinks lang. "Let's order
na?" I asked as I took a seat.
Still beaming, Ivanna answered "Sure."
I raised my hand and called the attention of the nearest waiter. It took us five
minutes to order. Maybe we're all killing time. Maybe we're all just too picky with
our food. I don't know.
GAH. WHY IS THIS SO AWKWARD.
After
repeating our orders, the waiter announced that it will take 15 minutes to serve
our food. The three of us watched him leave.
I turned to Ivanna and Alvin. "So... Hi!" I smiled. Oh my gods. I'm such a dork.
"Uhm, how are you?" I asked to no one in particular. Bahala na sila sumagot.
Ivanna grinned at me, like she knows what I was just thinking. "We're great. Ikaw
po?" she asked.
I'm a wreck. "I'm good." Uhh. What else should I ask? Oh! I know, the traffic!
"Hindi naman kayo na traffic? Nahanap niyo agad dito?" I looked around the resto to
avoid eye-contact. I hope it looked subtle.
This time, Alvin answered. "Yeah. You know, Google Maps and all."
"That's good," I commented lamely.
The three of us just smiled at each other. Shiz. This is a train-wreck waiting to
happen.
"So... This is awkward," I said, chuckling. I don't know what had gone into my head
and I blurted that all of a sudden. My gods, L. Why are you acting like a dork!
You're older than them and they're just... chill!
"Sorry nga pala if papa forced you into this. We just really want to meet you
personally," Ivanna apologized. I can see the sincerity in her eyes and in the way
she said those words. Why does she have to be so sweet? I may not control myself
and just squish her cheeks because she's too cute and sweet!
I shook my head. Did it come across that I was forced into this? "He didn't exactly
force me to meet you. Naisip ko rin na it's time to meet my... uh, siblings."
"Really?" Ivanna asked in surprise.
Before I could answer, she turned her head to Alvin. "Alam mo ba, I was so jealous
when Alvin said he saw you in the hospital."
And yeah, it has been brought up. I need to apologize now. "Oh, about that. Sorry
for the way I reacted," I said to Alvin. I hope he knows I'm utterly embarrassed
for the way I acted. I hope he knows I'm really sorry.
He nodded and smiled. "It's okay. You were shocked. It was clearly a knee-jerk
reaction."
They're too forgiving. They're too different from me. I always hold a grudge. Saan
ko ba nakuha yun?
I sighed. "So... How do we do this?" I asked. I really want this to work out for
papa.
Ivanna grinned. "You can ask us questions. Imposibleng wala kang questions to us...
about us," she said, shrugging carelessly.
Questions? I only have one question. I always ask myself this since I learned about
them.
Okay. It's time to be honest. "What does it feel like? Having a sister that doesn't
know you existed?" I asked cautiously.
Ivanna's smile disappeared before looking at Alvin.
She turned her head back and faced me. "Of course, it's really sad and weird." She
scrunched her nose. "Sometimes I stalk you in your social media accounts-I know,
it's creepy. I'm tempted to message you about us existing. You seem like a very
cool person kasi and I really, really want to have an ate. "
Alvin nudged her hard and chuckled at her frowning face. "You sounded real creepy."
"I was just being honest!" she snapped at him, still glowering.
Alvin taunted her. "Creepy stalker,"
he singsonged. I laughed at their childish banter. So ganito pala maging ate? It's
kind of familiar. I've been a 'mother hen' to Jamie and Kim. They always banter
like this. There's always a childish fight.
Hindi rin pala ganun ka-different talaga when it comes to looking after at your own
siblings.
"Fan boy!" Ivanna countered before sticking out her tongue. Alvin blushed furiously
as he glared back at Ivanna.
Okay. What was that? There's a private joke in there that I don't get.
"Fan boy? Anong meron?" I asked, curious.

Alvin panicked. "Don't!"
Ivanna burst into laughter. "No way. I need to get even!" But before she could tell
what it was about, Alvin covered her mouth his with hand. "Hefyufbofrsfaboh!"
Ivanna screamed but it was muffled by Alvin's hand.
"What? I can't understand her, Alvin!" I chastised him.
Alvin looked at me and Ivanna took her chance. She bit into his palm. Alvin pulled
his hand away from her.
"He's your boyfriend's fan boy!" Ivanna shrieked.
Uhhh. What? "What? Boyfriend?" I asked, still confused.
Alvin was about to cover her momuth again when she grabbed her glass and threatened
to spill her drink to him. "Yes! Si Cascade Ongpauco! That's why he wasn't offended
when your boyfriend dragged you out of papa's room. He was too shocked that you're
dating he's idol!" Ivanna blabbed while dodging Alvin's hands.
My eyes almost popped out of their sockets in shock. "Really? Why?" I asked,
dumbstruck.
Alvin stopped and slouched on his seat. "Because he's good at football," he
grumbled.
I heard Ivanna
snickered. Hindi ko siya pinansin and tried to talk to Alvin. I feel like siya yung
mas reserved between the two.
"Do you play?" I asked him.
He looked up at me and smiled. "Yes. I actually just started. My coach says I need
to pack up more muscle. Good thing I'm a fast runner," he started to blab
excitedly. He didn't even notice Ivanna snorting at him. "But Cascade? He's just so
fuc-freaking good!" He stopped when he slipped with the f-word.
I chuckled at his enthusiasm and of course, at his slip. "Hey, I'm not papa. Don't
filter your words."
Who would've thought Cascade would help reaching out to my half-brother?
We talked more. About sports, about their schooling, about our favorite food, about
their budding love lives... we talked about so many things. We didn't even notice
the time! I don't know. It feels right talking and bonding with them like this.
I even paid for our bill. I felt natural to pay for it. Is that my older-sister
instinct kicking? I don't know. It feels right indulging them.
I checked my phone after they excused themselves to use the restroom. Siguro mag-
uusap rin sila about me. I sound so paranoid.
I shook my head and looked down on my phone. There's one message from Andrew,
I texted Kade first that we're about to leave before checking Andrew's text.
Oi. Halloween Party on the 30th.
Come with me?
I sighed. He's fun to be with pero I know Kade's not gonna happy about this.
I'm with Kade now, I replied.
From:
Andrew Cajucom
So what? We're friends.
You can ask him too. He can join us.
I rolled my eyes. Just like that? Maybe he's planning something. What's the catch?
Nothing. We're not rivals anymore.
It's time to end this shit.
He has a point but I can't help but feel skeptic. I heard it straight from him
before that he likes watching Kade be miserable.
I'm gonna have to ask him first.
Alright. Just hit me up later.
They came back just in time. I slipped my phone inside my sling bag and stood up
from seat. "Are you sure you know your way pauwi?" I asked them for the last time
as we walked towards the exit.
Ivanna laughed. "Yes. We're going to meet our mom sa SM."
"Oh. Okay," was the only thing I said. I mean, what do I say about their mom? It's
just... eh.
"Let's meet up again! Malapit na sembreak namin ni Alvin!" Ivanna exclaimed when we
all got outside the resto.
I smiled at her. "Sure! Just text me when you two are available."
"Yay!" she squealed and clapped.
"We gotta go. Thank you for meeting up with us!" Alvin said with a shy smile.
I smiled back. "Thank you. It was nice to finally meet you, Alvin and Ivanna." I
hugged them and kissed their cheeks. "Be safe. Text me when you're with her na."
"Okay. Take care, too!" Alvin said and gave me a final wave.
I watched them walk towards the parking are when Ivanna suddenly stopped and
whirled around to face me. "Oh my god! I forgot!" she
squealed before running towards me. Maybe she forgot something inside.
She stopped in front of me. "Sabi ko I gotta have selfies and hugs from you!" And
she just jumped and gave me a huge bear hug. She's too strong for a small teenage
girl! My gods. She's a fireball.
"There goes creepy Ivanna again," Alvin snickered.
Ivann didn't pay him any attention and continued hugging me after snapping our
selfie. "I had fun!" she exclaimed when pulled away from me. "It was really nice to
meet you, ate!"
I just smiled and waved at them as they left me there. I'm too stunned and
overwhelmed with what had just happened.
Just one word. 'Ate.'
Wow. It made me feel... something.

I don't know what it is but it's a nice, warm, fuzzy feeling. I like it.
"Hey, Salazar!" I snapped back to reality when I heard Kade's voice. I looked
around and saw him standing a few meters away from me. He's wearing a white
collared shirt and dark jeans and on his left hand, there's a bouquet of red roses
and a pizza box on the other.
"So, how about that date your dad owes us?" he asked with that hald-smile half-
smirk of his.
I grinned at him. "Stay there."
I took my phone and trained it to him. Kade gamely stood and smiled as I took a
picture of him.
LouisseSalazar My kind of guy.
***
"I'm sorry. I won't be able to join you tonight," Kade said through the phone.
I glowered at my reflection in the mirror. "Why?" I asked.
I'm all dolled-up and it's all for nothing? He's bailing out on me on the last
minute.
Kade sighed. "My adoptive dad, Uncle Harrold asked me to help him with something. I
can't say no," he replied. I can imagine him pouting right now.
I squeezed my eyes shut and sat down in front of my vanity mirror. "That's okay. I
won't go na lang," I said to him, kind of disappointment. I understand him, though.
"Hey, you were excited about this, a Halloween party without costumes," he said
with a chuckle.
I snorted. "I was excited to go because you were supposed to come with me." This
was supposed to be our first party as plain Kade and Louisse. No masks. No
costumes. No secrecy. Just us being together.
"You can go with Andrew. He won't to touch you," he suddenly said. "I'll fucking
kill him if he does, he knows that."
I didn't answer him at first. "Fine. I'll go with him. I don't want to bail out on
him on the last minute," I said. Sayang din tong pag-aayos ko. I spent too much
time curling my hair to let it go in to waste. I also missed hanging out with
Andrew. He's fun to be with. He's sarcastic and funny. Masaya kausap.
Kade groaned. "Babe, I'm sorry."
I smacked my forehead. Shit. "Hey! It's not a dig! I totally understand. You're
forgiven," I immediately explained. I don't want us to have a misunderstanding
because of this. It's too shallow.
Kade sighed again. "I'm just one text away. If I finish up soon, I might drive you
home."
I smiled at the possibility. Sana makahabol siya. "Okay. Just call me when you're
done."
"Bye.
I love you, Salazar." My breath hitched hearing him drop it.
I bit my lips before I answered. "I'll answer that later. Bye!" I dropped the call
with a chuckle.
***
"Where's Kade?" was the first thing Andrew said to me when I got out of my Mini
Cooper.
I shrugged. "Something came up. But he gave me permission to join you," I explained
on his behalf.
Andrew leaned back and frowned. "Really? That's weird. He's not threatened?"
I smirked at his confused face. "He said he's going to kill you if you do something
stupid."
Andrew rolled his eyes as he guided me towards the house where the party's at. "I
don't need his threats. You're not my type, Louisse."
I turned to him and sneered. "Fuck off, Andrew." Hey, he's totally my type kaya nga
Jamie and Kim picked him to be my blind date. Masakit pa rin kaya sabihin na hindi
type no. My ego's bruised. Wala pa naman si Kade to stroke it.
"I'm just kidding." Andrew snickered. I nudge him hard. "You're my friend. You're
safe with me."
Yun naman pala. I'm here for no other reason. Why didn't he come with a date? Maybe
he got rejected?
"Why didn't you invite a date?" I asked as we got inside the house. Wow. It's
packed. The smell of cigarettes and sweat is too strong.
"I don't do dates," Andrew shouted on my ear. The music is too loud for this kind
of conversation.
I leaned up to him and shouted. "But he had one date." Did he already forget about
the disaster of a date we had?
Andrew smirked at me. "Lake asked a favor."
My jaw dropped. "So you pity-dated
me." I did not expect this. Lake was behind that date too? And Lake knew Kade and
Andrew were rivals! Grabe! Those sneaky little punks!
He shrugged smugly. "Something like that. Lake and I are friends too, you know."
"Really?" I asked. Letting it go. Maganda naman kinalabasan. Kade and I are okay
now.
"Yup." He nodded before draping his hand on my shoulder. "Anyway, you're going to
be my wing girl tonight." He pulled me towards the kitchen to probably get drinks.
"Find me my next conquest after we get a drink."
Once we got into the kitchen, Andrew took two bottles of beer near the beer keg.
Good, I prefer to drink from a bottle not from a beer keg. Andrew opened it then
gave it to me.
"Cheers to us, Louisse!" He raised his bottle and I did the same. He took three
gulps and took a sip from mine.
"Let's go. We're gonna test your wing-woman prowess."
***
"Fuck, something's not right," Andrew said when we reached the wall living room.
The house is still packed with drunk people. Wala akong masyadong kilala. I thought
this is a party hosted by our batchmate?
"Are you okay, Andrew?" I asked him before taking another sip from my drink.
"Did you drink your beer?" he asked, his words already slurring.
I frowned at him. Why is he asking when he just saw me take a sip? "Yeah. Three
sips. Why?" I asked, confused.
Andrew groaned. "Fuck." He pressed the back of his head on the wall.
"Andrew?" I called him, starting to get worried.
"It's spiked," he slurred, his eyes starting to drop.
"What?"
I sputtered, dropping the beer bottle. I looked down and saw the broken bottle on
the door. Nobody seemed to mind.
"Roofied."
That made me look up at him. "How did you know?" I asked, wide-eyed. I can feel my
heart starting to beat faster.
Before Andrew could answer, he just dropped to his knees. "Andrew!" With wide eyes,
I bent down to help him but nausea suddenly hit me and I felt dizzy. The room
started to spin and my knees buckled and I felt the sting of the broken bottle on
me.
I found myself standing once again but there are two men holding my both of my arms
to support me. I looked up and saw Andrew was between two men too. They're holding
him up and he's too weak to make a protest.
I tried to talk but I can't seem to open my mouth.
Dread and panic seeped through my veins when I noticed they were carrying us
upstairs. I tried to fight of the dizziness and the nausea. My eyes are dropping
too but I tried my hardest to fight it.
"Pare, girlfriend to ni Cascade Ongpauco," I heard someone said when we reached the
top of the stairs.
"And she's with Andrew Cajucom too?" I felt a hand grabbed my jaw and brusquely
lifted my face. Despite my condition, I recognized who it was. "Damn girl. You must
have a magic pussy," Shalvis said to my face. I caught a whiff of his breath, it
smelled bad. Bad like marijuana.
He dropped his hold on my face. My head immediately lolled back. Fuck. I can't feel
my limbs. I can't feel anything. "Bring them to the farthest room." I heard Shalvis
said as they moved us.
"Strip them all of their clothes." My breath hitched at their evil plans. "Make
them fuck each other and record the whole thing with my phone."
Oh my gods. They will use it for blackmail. They will show it to Cascade.
Shit. I shouldn't have come. I shouldn't have left the house.
They threw us on a bed. My head lolled back to the side and I saw Andrew's eyes
were opened. They were filled with fear, dread and hatred.
I want to cry in hopelessness but my eyes won't even cooperate with me. I want to
kick someone. I want to protest. But I can't do anything, my limbs were like
useless. I can't even feel them.
I watched with my two eyes as they set up everything. The lights in the bedroom
were too harsh. Some guy was holding up the phone and some of them hovered over us.
I wanted to scream when they ripped my dress. FUCK YOU!!! FUCK YOU!!! YOU'RE ALL
FUCKING COWARD! CRIMINALS! YOU'RE ALL FUCKING VILE! YOU'RE ALL FUCKING EVIL!
I wanted to thrash my body badly. I wanted to kick them with my booted heels. But I
can't. I can't do anything but wait for my ruin.
No one will help us. No one even knows we're here just these demons.
PLEASE. LORD. HELP US, PLEASE.
HELP ME.
HELP!!!
I can't do anything about this. I can't even see their faces now. My eyes are
starting to close.
"Put him above her."
"Rip her bra and panties first."
It was the last thing I heard before my eyes closed. Someone grabbed on my bra and
panties and I heard them rip them both.
Oh my gods. Cascade. He's going to blame himself for this. He's going to fucking
kill himself after killing them.
Sana pala I answered him back earlier. I didn't know it would probably be the last
time.
"Bye. I love you, Salazar."
I fucking love you, too, Ongpauco.
93
=================
Chapter 46: Blink Twice

Chapter 46
Blink Twice
I heard a loud crash but it was too far. I heard male screams and loud curses. I
heard soft please. I heard everything but I can't seem to open my heavy eyelids. I
can't move. I can't feel anything... but I can still hear them.
"Louisse, wake up!" I felt a sharp sting on my cheeks but it was gone too soon.
"Wake the fuck up!" said by the faint voice. I felt his hands touch my shoulders
and he shook me furiously. "WAKE UP!" he yelled once again, his voice louder.
"Get Andrew! Cover him with blankets!"
Andrew? Oh gods. Are these people going to rescue us?
"Louisse, you need to wake up!" a new voice said.
"She won't wake up! Throw me that blanket. I'll wrap it around her body."
And then I heard a loud scream.
"Jake! Lake! River! Get him! He's going to kill him!" someone shouted.
"You need to wake-up, Louisse," the familiar voice said. There was a sharp sting on
my face again. My eyes immediately opened but I can't see clearly. My eyes are too
tired to focus. "Louisse, this is Yap. I know you can't talk or move right now. But
I need answers from you."
It's Yap! Thank God! Someone above there really listened to my pleas.
The darkness is consuming me again but I'm fighting it. I'm fighting just so I
could answer his questions.
"Blink once for no. Blink twice if the answer is yes, okay?" A sharp sting hit my
face again. "May dala ka bang bag?" he waited and I tried my hardest to blink at
him
once.
No. Wala akong dala... just my car.
"I found her keys and Andrew's!" someone shouted.
"Did they touch you?" I blinked twice.
Ye's, they touched me and I feel so violated and disgusted with myself.
"Did they... insert anything to you?" I blinked once.
I don't know. But it's probably a No, and thank God for Yap. He came just in time.
"Did you drink from the beer bottles?" I blink twice.

"Shit," he hissed. "Positive. They both took the spiked bottles."
"We need to fucking go!"
"Jake! Gio! Get Andrew!" Yap shouted. "Lake, River! Get your fucking brother!"
"CASCADE!!!"
Cascade? Kade is here? He's with Yap?
"Let me go! I'm not fucking done with this asshole! I'm going to fucking kill him!"
a familiar voice roared... Is that Kade?
"Take the baseball bat from him!"
"Kade, we need to go! We need to bring Louisse and Andrew to the hospital!"
"Are we going to call the police?"
Suddenly, it was like I was floating in the air and the darkness is starting to
pull me again. I don't wanna go. I want to stay with Yap. I want to hear Kade's
voice again.
"No. Hindi pwede! Makakasuhan din tayo! We need to go right now!"
"Get all the evidences! There's a way from the back!"
"Louisse, hang-on, okay?" Yap's soothing voice rang. "We'll get you to the
hospital."
***
"Cascade, we need to see to your wounds."
I can't open my eyes. No matter how I tried, I can't seem to open them. I still
can't feel my whole body but thank gods I can hear everyone around me. I'm still
surrounded with darkness and I can't see any
ray of light.
"I'm not leaving her side," Kade said.
"Kade, please. Duguan ka din," a female voice said. I can tell it's Jamie's.
Duguan si Kade? Why?
"This isn't my blood," he answered back. If it isn't his, kanino?
"Edi magpalit ka ng damit! Tingin mo matutuwa si L makita kang ganyan!" Jamie

yelled.
"Tone down your voice, baby." Was that River?
"Jamie's right, Kade," said by another male voice. It's Lake! "You need to get your
hands checked. Take a shower to and throw your clothes somewhere."
"I don't want to fucking leave her," Kade growled back to him. Compared to
everyone, his voice is the clearest and loudest to me.
"We'll call you if she wakes up. Agad-agad. Promise," said by a new female voice.
It was Kim's.
Kade talked back again but his voice became distant. I feel like floating once
again and I let myself go with it. I'm too tired to fight. The vibration of their
voices lulled me into sleep again.
***
I pulled away from the darkness and the first thing that I saw was Kade's back. I
didn't make a sound when I noticed there were other men in the room. They were
discussing something serious.
I wonder what it is.
I looked around the room and saw Jamie and Kim were sitting at the sofa near my
bed. They're both sleeping soundly. I noticed Jamie's hand is clasping a rosary
while a Bible is on Kim's lap.
Ano bang meron? Why am I in a hospital? Why are there needles stuck in my hands?
Why is there a tube on my nose?
"General Cajucom wants to talk to Kade."
My eyes snapped back to the men talking to Kade.
They're his friends... If I'm not mistaken, sila yung pinakilala niya sa akin...
yung team mates niya.
"Everyone talked to him already. Ikaw na lang ang hindi pa." Oh. Yap's here too?
And who's this General they're talking about?
"I don't want to talk to him," Kade growled.
A man cupped Kade's shoulder, it was Lake. "You need to. He needs to know
everything."
Yap went close to him. "Gising na si Andrew but he doesn't remember anything kaya
wala siyang ma-contribute. The doctors said it's a side effect of the drug they
gave them."
What? Anong meron kay Andrew?
Memories from the Halloween Party started to flash before my very eyes. It was
pretty hazy . It was like a blurred movie caught in film.
Oh my gods. I was with Andrew last. Is that why I'm here lying on a hospital bed?
What drug are they talking about? Nalason ba ako?
Hindi ko sila maintidihan but they're basically saying that Andrew was drugged and
he can't remember anything.
"Louisse won't remember what happened too?" Kade asked all of a sudden.
What? I won't remember what exactly? Is that why I have these hazy memories from
the Halloween Party? The last thing I remember was walking towards a confused-
looking Andrew.
"She won't."
"They spiked their drink with a date-rape drug. Hindi pa sigurado kung ano." WHAT?!
Did I hear him correctly? I was drugged too? "But probably GHB or Rohypnol because
of the anterograde amnesia side-effect."
"Those motherfuckers probably opened the beer bottles and put the drugs in them
before the party started," Yap said as he shook his
head.
"But why Andrew and Louisse?" Lake asked, his voice laced with confusion and
hatred.
River answered him. "Louisse is connected to us and Andrew is... Andrew."
My gaze followed Yap. "Mabuti daw na tinawagan natin agad yung parents ni Andrew at
dito tayo pinadiretso sa V Luna. Kung hindi, malaki daw ang chance na hindi makaka-
survive si Andrew nun dahil mas marami siyang nainom kesa kay Louisse."
WHAT? He could have died too?
"Go to him, Kade. We owe him a lot," River tried to convince Kade once again.
"There are rumors that Shalvis' parents are going to press charges even though
Shalvis doesn't want to."
Shalvis? As in the same Shalvis that River punched at kicked out of The Ledge
months ago?
"General Cajucom is the only one who could help us."
General Cajucom? He must be Andrew's relative. Kung sino man siya, I wanted to
thank him for helping us.
Kade's tensed shoulders slouched when he sighed. "Okay." He was about to turn to
look at me when I closed my eyes again. I heard his footsteps coming closer. I
pretended to sleep while I wait for his next move.
What is he gonna do? Is he just going to stand there and stare at me?
I was answered when I felt his roughened hand smoothen the stray hairs on my face.
I fought the urge to cry when I felt his lips against my forehead. "Feel better,
Salazar."
***
I woke up with a start. I have been going in and out of consciousness for days. I
can now open my eyes and move my limbs. I'm starting to feel again. But some of my
sense are still dulled.
I still can't remember what happened...
and I probably will never remember them. But hearing them talk was enough for me to
know what had really happened to me and Andrew.
I didn't know the specifics but I know that our drinks were roofied. Never in my
life would I think that I will be victimized by a date-rape drug. I know those
things exist.
I'm always careful when I'm in clubs. I never accept drinks from strangers. I never
let anyone buy me drinks. I never take my eyes off my drink.
In house parties, I never eat any food the hosts served. Marijuanas are mixed in
brownies. Cocaine is mixed in barbecue sauce. Any food can get spiked too. I also
never drink in cups because the beer keg is most likely spiked too.
Beer bottles were safer.
Or so I thought.
May mga gago pala talaga na would go above and beyond to victimize someone. Gods,
ang effort nun. Open a bottled beer and seal it again after putting drugs on it?
Grabe.
I shook my head. I looked around the hospital room. That's when I noticed Kade
sleeping at the couch near my bed. He looked so exhausted and so... cramped up in
there. He's too big for that couch.
"Kakatulog lang niyan."
I looked up and saw Jamie and Kim standing at the door, nakasilip lang. I waved
them to come inside silently. It was awkward because there's an IV on both of my
hands.
"How are you feeling?" Jamie asked with a tentative smile as she sat on the chair
near my bed.
I shrugged. "I don't know... numb, maybe," I answered, my voice hoarse from disuse.
"May natatandaan ka ba sa mga nangyari?" Kim asked cautiously as she went over to
the table.
She took a plastic cup and filled it with water.
I shook my head. "But I know enough. I heard some things."
"Maybe it's a good thing na wala kang masyadong naaalala," Jamie said. I looked
back at her and saw her wringing her hands. She looked nervous.
"Do you know something?" I asked, reaching out my hand to her. Jamie took it and
she looked at me. Her eyes were wet. "May dapat ba akong malaman?" I asked once
again, my heart started to pound against my chest.
"They tested you... you know yung rape-kit thingy," she said with a small voice.
I tensed. "What's the result?"
"Negative. Walang penetration na nangyari," Jamie answered after looking away from
me.
Are they hiding something? "Pero may ibang nangyari? What?" I asked, tamping down
the urge to shout at them. Gods, if they know something alam nilang dapat ko
malaman yun!
"River told me what he saw there," Jamie stopped when her breath hitched. "You
were... I can't tell you this, L."
I shook my head and pleaded. "Please tell me. Mababaliw ako lalo kapag hindi ko
nalaman!"
Jamie squeezed her eyes shut and took a deep breath. "You and Andrew were naked.
Those bastarads were about to put him on top of you when River, Kade and our
friends barged inside the room." She stopped to wipe her tears away. I looked up to
Kim, waiting for her to continue what Jamie was saying.
She sat on my hospital bed. "May mga dala silang baseball bats at yun yung gamit
nila pang depensa. Pero si Kade, sabi sakin ni River... he snapped when he saw your
ripped clothes on the floor."
I gasped at the painted picture inside
my head. I have seen a furious Kade before but he still has control. Yes, he said
hurtful words but he never just snapped and became physical... and knowing that it
was because of me breaks my heart.
I looked at his sleeping form on the couch. He looked tensed even though he should
be relaxing. He's not letting his guard down even when he's unconscious.
"He was out for blood. River said Kade was going to kill Shalvis on the spot,"
Jamie said. I looked at his hands and saw that they were wrapped with bandages. His
hands were mangled because of me.
"Anong nangyari kay Shalvis? Is he dead?" I asked when a vision of a bloodied up

Shalvis entered my brain. I'm just hoping na mas malala sa nai-imagine ko yung
dinanas niya sa kamay ni Kade. Just looking at his hands... I know he caused major
damage.
I want Shalvis and his friends to fucking die and rot in hell.
"No. But Kade beat him into a pulp. Just looked at his hands. They're mangled dahil
ginawa niyang punching bag si Shalvis." Yeah, kanina ko pa napansin. "Mabuti na
lang napigilan siya nina Lake nung may nakuha siyang baseball."
I looked back at Jamie, remembering there was another victim besides me. "And then?
Anong nangyari sa amin ni Andrew?"
"Yap covered you up and Jake took care of Andrew. Si Yap din ang nagbuhat sayo
hanggang sa makatakas kayo. Nagtulung-tulong sina Gio at Jake para buhatin naman si
Andrew. River and Grant drove yours and Andrew's car."
They saw my naked body. Those fucking bastards didn't just stripped me off my
clothes... they stripped me off my dignity too. And our friends and Kade...
they saw me in my lowest point.
They saw me naked and helpless. Sino pa ako without my pride and dignity?
"Si Lake at Ryan naman ang nagpakalma kay Kade at kumuha ng evidences sa lugar."
What Jamie said made me tensed up. "Evidences?" Against Kade? Baka sila pa ang
mapahamak instead of those scums!
"Yours and Andrew's clothes, phones and Shalvis' phone," Kim answered.
Shalvis phone? Anong meron sa phone niya? "What's with Shalvis' phone?" I asked.
Shit. Did they took pictures of me? Pictures of Andrew?
"Just spit it out!" I yelled at them when I saw them eyes each other in panic.
Jamie swallowed loucdly before she answered. "He asked his friends to record the
whole thing."
WHAT?! "Good gods. Nakita na nga nila buong pagkatao ko and they wanted to record
the whole thing too?" I yelled... staring to feel helpless again. This can't be
happening! Why is this happening to me? What the hell did I do to deserve this?
"Binura na nila yung video, L! Sinira na nila yung phone!" Kim said, trying to
calm me down.
I shook my head as the wheels on my head started to turn, thinking of the worst
case scenarios. "Pero evidence yun sa kanila for blackmail or shit!" The panic is
starting to suffocate me again. The fact that they have a copy at pwede nilang
ipakalat yun makes me want to vomit and just fucking die.
"Utos kasi ni General at gusto din ni Kade na wala nang makakita nun!" Jamie chimed
in, trying to make me calm down.
No! Someone may watch it again! Baka kumalat sa internet! "Shit! May makakakita pa
nun, J! What if na-save sa iCloud niya?"
Jamie
shook her head. "L, android phone yung gamit ni Shalvis!"
"Kahit na! Maybe he has cloud backups too!" No! May backup and storage din ang
android phones!
"The general's on it na. Magpapatulong siya sa NBI," Jamie answered back.
Ayan na naman yung General Cajucom na yan! Who is he? Is he related to Andrew? "And
who the hell is this general?" I asked.
"That would be Andrew's father," said by a male voice.
The three of us turned our heads to Kade. He's sitting up now at the couch.
"Kade..." was the only thing I said when he stood up and walked towards my bed.
He leaned down to me and smoothen my hair. "Are you okay? What do you feel?" he
asked.
Physically? I'm tired. Emotionally? I'm disgusted. "I'm too numb."
Kade sighed. "Do you want anything? Do you want to sit up? Do you want water?"
"Yes to both, thanks."
Kim immediately handed me the forgotten cup on her hands. Kade helped me hold it as
I drank from it after he adjusted my bed. "What else do you need?"
Do I need anything else? Do I want to know more? Do I need to know more?
Si Andrew. Shit. I haven't asked about his condition.
"Si Andrew. How is he? Is he awake?" I asked.

"He doesn't remember anything but he's traumatized, Salazar," Kade answered, his
voice troubled.
"I heard he almost died."
He nodded. "Yeah, almost. Good thing he was brought here immediately and he's
healthy. He recovered fast." That's good... I guess.
The three of us went quiet for a minute. It was me who broke the silence. "What do
we do know? We can't let
them get away." Kailangan nilang panagutan yung ginawa nila to me and Andrew. We
need justice. We need to get our revenge.
"We can't press charges," Kade answered.
"Why the fuck not?" I asked in rage. Paanong we can't press charges? If anything
may laban kami! Madami kaming evidences and witnesses!
"Because we've beaten them into a pulp, the evidences against them were destroyed
and there's Andrew's dad."
"Ilabas lang ng family nito sa media, mawawala ang connections ni General Cajucom,"
Jamie added.
"But they sexually assaulted us!" I yelled at them. Kade's jaw clenched and my two
friends looked away. "So what? That's it?"
"We're going to make them pay," Kade hissed at me.
"How?" I sneered back at him.
"Don't worry your pretty little head, Miss Salazar. I won't let them get away with
what they did to you and to my son," said by an older male voice.
Our heads snapped back to the door and saw two old men standing there. The two old
men were older versions of Cascade and Andrew.
"I will also help," said by Architect Antichrist.
What the hell is he doing here?
"Dad? What are you doing here?" Kade sputtered to his dad.
"I'm the only one who gets to mess up my sons. Nobody messes with my family." Of
course, siya lang pwede.
Architect looked at Andrew's dad. "Let's inform them about the plan, General
Cajucom."
***
I woke up with a start again when I felt the strong and warm arms wrapped around
me. I thrashed immediately when the panic rose inside me. No! I won't be paralyzed
anymore! No! I won't be helpless again!
"Shh...
Babe. It's me. It's Kade." Kade whispered at me just in time before I screamed.
"Baby, you're safe. I'm here. You're safe with me," he whispered to my ear with his
soothing voice. His arms around me loosened.
I stopped struggling and tried to calm my frayed nerves and my pounding heart.
You're safe, Louisse. Kade is here.
Kade is here.
He's safe.
I'm safe.
***
I woke up again in the middle of the night. I almost thrashed again but I stopped
when I remembered it was Kade who's lying beside me. I smelled his natural manly
smell mixed with his perfume.
His smell calmed me down.
His smell makes me feel safe.
I tried to go back to sleep but my eyes shot open when I heard a sob. Kade's arms
around me tightened and I felt something wet dropped at the back of my neck.
"This is my entire fault," I heard Kade's hoarse voice as he whispered those words.
My heart broke when I heard another sob came from him.
He's crying because of me.
He's blaming himself for what happened to me.
"I shouldn't have let you go. I should have invited you to go with me." I tried to
breathe normally. I don't want him to know I'm awake. He needs to let it all out. I
need to know what's going on in his head. "But I was too embarrassed. I don't want
you to see how I let Uncle Harrold bitch at me."
He's blaming himself dahil hindi niya ako niyaya to go with him papunta sa Uncle
niya? No. Hindi niya kasalanan yun. Walang connection yun.
Somebody's going to get hurt no matter what we did. Nasaktuhang kami ni Andrew ang
nabiktima because of our
choices.
"I'm going to fix this."
But it isn't our fault. Walang ibang may kasalanan nito but those motherfucking
scums who drugged us.
Kade continued to hug me and cry on the back of my neck. "I will do anything for
you."
Tears started to spill out of my eyes. All of the pent-up emotions... anger and
fear for what happened to us... the love and appreciation for this man crying for
me.
I touched his hands that were wrapped around my middle and held on. "This isn't
your fault, Kade," I whispered to him.
"I fucked this up," he sobbed. It felt like my heart is breaking into pieces.
He's unraveling because of me. Hindi ko matanggap na dahil sa akin kaya siya
umiiyak. I've never seen him sobbed before... not even cry. But look at him now...
He's breaking down because of me.
"No!" I looked over my shoulders and my eyes met his bloodshot eyes. "You didn't
fuck this up." I turned to him and touched his face.
"If I had known this would happ-" I covered his mouth with my hands, they IV tubes
swinging on top of us.
"No one knew what was gonna happen but those fucktards, okay?" I stared at his eyes
and watched them tear up. I wiped them even before they pour out of his eyes.
"Don't put this on your doorstep. This isn't your fault."
"They're going to pay for everything." I got goosebumps hearing the contained
hatred in his voice.
"Please, don't get yourself involved." The fear of losing him because he might do
something stupid almost suffocated me. I can't let him get involved.
"No! I need to-"
"No, Cascade you won't," I said
sternly. "You have an ill-mother and little sisters depending on you. You have so
much to lose."
"Then let me go to you to Singapore."
That was part of Architect Antichrist and General Cajucom's plan. They didn't tell
me the whole plan. They just told us parts in it and what we should do. They
drilled into our heads that we need to stick with the plan.
They ordered me to go to Singapore. They said I need to leave for them to do the
other parts of the plan. They said leaving will be my alibi. For what, they didn't
tell us.
I asked, of course. Pero hindi nila ako sinagot. There are things I need to know
and things that I don't. I'm going to Singapore with Yap and we're going to live
with Asher there.
I won't be leaving alone, though. Yap is going with me. Kade protested but his
father reminded him of his responsibilities with his mom and sisters.
Jamie and Kim will stay because they have their families here at nandyan naman si
River. He's gonna stay at the apartment with them and Lake will always visit them.
As for my parents, I will call them tomorrow and tell them I have accepted a job in
Singapore. They've been through a lot with me and papa's cancer. They don't need to
know about this. Baka makasama kay papa and kay mama. I don't wanna risk it.
"Cascade, no..." I said as held his face. I shook my head.
"They wouldn't let me do anything!" he said, helplessness and frustration in his

eyes and voice.
"You need to lie-low! I can't afford to lose you. Your family can't lose you just
because of me."
"Babe, no..." Kade grabbed my hands that were holding his face.
"We need to be apart this time for us to heal individually," I said trying to talk
sense into him. "Promise me you won't do something stupid." He kept his mouth shut.
"Promise me you'll wait for me."
Kade closed his eyes as he nodded. "I will wait for you, Salazar."
"I'm coming back to you, Ongpauco," I said as I pressed my lips against his
forehead. "I need you here when I get back, okay?"
He wrapped his arms around me and buried his face on my neck. "How can you comfort
me when you're supposed to be the one who needs comforting?" he whispered.
"I need to be strong for the two of us." At least for now. Pero pagdating sa
Singapore, I don't know what I will do to keep myself sane.
Away from home...
Away from my friends...
Away from my family...
Away from Kade...
"Come home to me, Salazar."
I squeezed me eyes shut and held on to him as new tears spill from my eyes.
=================
Chapter 47: Precious Cargo
Chapter 47
Precious Cargo
"Sorry ha. Hindi ko lang talaga ma-gets tong plano na to," Jamie asked as she
continued to pace across my bedroom. "Bakit kailangang pumunta ka sa Singapore?"
she asked then stopped. She placed her hands on her waist.
I didn't answer her and continued to rummage on my open luggage. I need to see if I
forgot anything or kung may maiiwan akong importanteng bagay. I don't need to bring
all of my stuff. Just the essentials. My papers, plane ticket, passport, clothes,
shoes, books, gadgets and toiletries.
"L, saan ka naman titira dun?" Kim asked. I looked away from my luggage and looked
up at her. She's sitting on my bed, leaning back on my headboard. If only she knew
what happened on that headboard when Kade and I-nevermind.
Get your mind off the gutter, Louisse. Focus.
"May friend kami duon," I answered before going back to work again.
"Does she know about the... you know?" Kim asked. I stopped for a beat before
continuing on double-checking on my things. I hate it when the 'accident' is
brought up. But then again, mapapag-usapan talaga yun because it's the reason why
I'm leaving the country for a few months.
I nodded. "She knows."
"E pero bakit si Yap ang kasama mo pumunta? Bakit hindi yung boyfriend mo?" Jamie
asked, she sounded annoyed.
Gods. How am I gonna answer those questions without outing Yap?
"Jamie, Kade is not my boyfriend," I said, trying to stall her.
Jamie scoffed. "Whatever. Napaka-obsessed mo sa
labels, as per usual." I thought she's going to drop it pero hindi pa pala. "Pero
bakit nga si Yap ang makakasama mo? Kilala mo ba yun? Bakit ang laki ng tiwala sa
kanya nina architect at general?"
I needed to act annoyed.
I stood up straight and leveled her with an exasperated look. "Jamie, huwag ka nang
makulit please. Naguguluhan ako sa ginagawa ko."
Jamie rolled her eyes. "Hmp! Bahala ka nga diyan! Concern lang naman yung tao!" she
huffed as she walked out. Kim and I shared a look.
"PMS-ing siguro," Kim said.
Hmm. Maybe.
***
We're on the way to the airport.
I sighed as I texted Kade again. Where the hell is he? Why is he not sending me
text messages? Why is he not calling? Aalis na lang ako and he's having a tantrum
or some shit? He's gone MIA na naman?
I looked up and caught Lake's eyes on the rear view mirror. He must've seen the
irritation in my face. "Yap is at the airport na. He just texted," he said.
I wasn't gonna ask it but Jamie did it for me. "Kasama niya ba si Kade?"
Lake sighed before shaking his head. "Nope. He's alone daw."
"Nasaan ba yun? Siya lang ang kulang!" Jamie suddenly growled.
Kim and I shared a look. Thank god we're not seated next to each other, we're both
seated beside the car doors.
"Baka may inaasikaso, J," Kim said.
Jamie huffed. "Ewan! Nakakairita siya! Last day na ni L dito sa Pilipinas, hindi
siya magpapaalam?"
What Jamie said made me feel even sadder. She's right. Why now?
"Babalik
naman si L!" Kim countered with a chuckle.
"Kailan naman? One-way ticket lang binili sa kanya! Tapos nilakaran pa ni general
ng visa yan. Oh kamusta, diba?" Jamie countered back.
I shook my head. "I'll be back when everything's okay na." I leaned towards her.
"Huwag ka ngang masyadong hot-headed diyan."
That made Jamie shut up. She looked away and pouted.
"Ano palang sabi nina Tito at Tita?" Kim suddenly asked.
I looked at her and cringe. "Nagalit at first kasi hindi ko sinabi sa kanila na
nag-apply pala ako sa Singapore." I rolled my eyes remembering the way I lied to
them through the phone. I hate it. "But when I assured them na legit naman yung
company at tatawag naman ako lagi, okay na."
"Too bad you're not really going there for a job," Jamie grumbled.
"Hindi sila nag-demand makita ka?" Kim asked.
I sighed. No matter how much I wanted to see them, hindi pwede. I might break down
and tell them everything. I can't do that. Baka makasama sa health ni papa and who
knows what they would do? Baka masira yung carefully made-up plans nina architect
at general. "I begged off. Sabi ko busy with the requirements." I smiled. "Nag
Facetime na lang kami." Sobrang fail but it have to suck-it up.
Jamie turned her head to us. "They let you get off the hook that easy?" she asked,
skeptic.
"I don't know. Siguro kasi I'm not living under the same roof with them? Or maybe
they can tell something is wrong but they're letting me handle it on my own." I
shrugged. "I honestly don't know."
That's what I was thinking too. My father is a clever guy and my
mom knows me too well. They can pick up if something's amiss. Maybe papa's just too
weak to argue and mama's too tired with my excuses.
"Wala pa ring balita kay Kade?" Jamie asked when I didn't answer her.
"I texted him. No reply," I said as I looked at my phone.
"Sakin din," Lake said.
Jamie huffed once again. "Anong topak kaya nun at ngayon pa nag-inarte?"
"Baka naman may emergency?" Kim suggested.
"If there's an emergency, dapat tinawagan na din kami," Lake said.
Kim looked back at me and frowned. "Pano yan? Pano kung wala talaga si Kade?"
"Hindi pa ba siya nagpapakita sa'yo?" Jamie asked. Daming tanong. Aalis na lang
ako, I have to be subjected pa ata into Spanish Inquisition. "Hindi man lang
magkikiss and goodbye?" she added.
"Baka naman nasa Singapore na at hinihintay ka sa airport!" Kim gasped.
I chuckled at her dreamy expression. She's really a hopeless-romantic. "Ano ka ba,

he's not allowed to come with me."
Kim's dreamy expression disappeared and was replaced with a pout. "Ahhh kaya. Kaya
nagtatampo!"
"Wow ha. Wrong timing siya magtampo ha," Jamie grumbled.
I tuned them out and texted Kade again.
***
If you have a shitty surprise, don't do it.
I just want to see you before I leave.
"I texted Yap. Kade's not there daw," Lake said. I looked up and saw him looking
over his shoulder at the shotgun seat.
"Okay, then. If he doesn't want to see me go, let him be," I said with a shrug,
clearing all
the emotions in my face. If he wants that, I'll give it to him.
"L..." Kim said with a sad face.
I interrupted her. "I don't want any dramatic goodbyes sa airport ha? You can just
drop me off. You guys don't have to climb out of the car."
Jamie and Kim looked at me with wide-eyes. "Hala! E para saan naghatid kami?" Jamie
exploded.
I shook my head. "I don't want to see your tears. Ayoko din umiyak. Dito na lang
tayo sa car mag say ng goodbyes and have hugs."
We all went silent. I looked at our driver, River. Kanina pa siya tahimik, Well,
his girlfriend does the talking for him naman.
"You see this R2-D2 ring?" I looked back at Jamie and my eyes went immediately at
her necklace. It was indeed an R2-D2 ring. She used it as a pendant. Ngayon ko lang
napansin yan ah?
"Yeah. What about it?" I asked, staring at it. I got mesmerized at it. The rays of
sunlight were making the blue and red stones sparkld.
"Dito dapat nakalagay yan. Kaso secret pa e," Jamie said, dropping the ring and
holding up her left hand. She pointed at her ring finger.
We all got quiet as we stared at Jamie's left hand.
"Holy tacos!" I gasped when it hit me.
"WEH?! OMG!" Kim exploded, getting it just in time.
Jamie put an index finger on her lips. "Shh lang kayo ha!"
They're gonna get married? Why?

I looked at River and saw him smirking as Lake give him shit about not telling how
he proposed. He didn't let us help him plan! He wouldn't even tell us now how he
proposed!
I reached up and slapped him on his shoulder. "What the heck, dude?"
River just chuckled.
"Papadalhan
na lang kita ng invitation sa Singapore." I looked back to Jamie and saw her
smirking too! River really corrupted my girl. "Kapag hindi ka umuwi sa araw na yun,
friendship over na tayo."
I shook my head in disbelief. "Oh my gods! Come here!" I reached over and hugged
her with Kim between us. "Are you for real?" I asked as I pulled away.
Jamie nodded. "Totoo nga! Matulis siya e!"
We all laughed at her. Kahit kailan talaga!
I stared at her for a while. Jamie reached her hand to River's shoulder. Without
looking over, he knows it was her. He took her hand and kissed her knuckles. It
made Jamie's smile widened.
She looked so happy. But it's too fast.
I hope it will last. I hope they're not making a mistake. I hope they make it work
because marriage is not a joke. It wouldn't be easy. They really have to make it
work. I pray for them to make it last.
But for now, we need to be happy for their decision. Lalo na if it makes them so
happy and knowing this is River and Jamie, mabilis talaga sila. They're the
whirlwind couple. That's how they roll.
"I'm so happy for you!" I told her.
Jamie beamed at me. "Salamat! But I wish nandito ka sa araw ng kasal ha?"
I nodded eagerly. "Of course! I wouldn't miss it for the world!" That wouldn't
happen. I'll do anything makauwi lang just for her wedding.
"We're nearing the airport," I heard River said. We all looked at the windows and
saw the we really are approaching the airport.
"Time for hugs na!" I said, turning to my best friends. We pulled each other and
hugged tightly. We pulled away from
the group hug and they hugged me individually this time. It was Kim who hugged me
first.
"Mag-iingat ka dun ha? Call, text or FB ha! Facetime!" Kim whispered to as we

hugged. I can tell she's gonna burst into tears by the way her voice starts to
tremble.
"Of course."
When I moved away from Kim, Jamie pulled me into her arms and hugged me tightly. "I
know you're wondering bakit ang bilis na naman. But we think it's the right time
for us."
"As long as you're happy, then I am happy, J," I told her honestly. Nakaguilty that
she knows I'm having doubts. But that's my role. I'm the over-thinker. I'm the
Mother Hen.
"I'm happy," she whispered. "And we're... pregnant." WHAT?! Oh my gods. Of course!
I was about to shout at her when she interrupted me. "Huwag kang maingay! Ikaw
palang nakakaalam sa mga friends namin!"
Translation: Shut up. Hindi pa alam nila Kim.
Fine.
I pulled away from her and grabbed both of her shoulders. "Take care of yourself,
okay? Mother Hen's not here to look after you," I said to her with a firm voice.
She just laughed it off and pointed at her husband-to-be. "Don't worry about me.
May mag-aalaga na sakin."
I shook my head. They're moving too fast talaga. But looking at the bright side,
they have forever to slow down.
I looked at River. "Hey, River." He looked over his shoulders. I glared at him.
"Take care of the precious cargo, okay?" I said with an arched brow.
He smiled. "Always."
I shook my head before looking at Lake who's seated in front of me. "And you, Lake!
Take care of the kid ha?"
Lake chuckled but
nodded. "I'll take care of Kim, don't you worry."
River parked his car in front of the international gate. "Bye, guys!" I said as I
opened the car door.
"Have a safe flight!" Jamie said, starting to tear up. I felt my eyes started to
sting too. Shit. I don't wanna cry!
I looked away from her. I avoided their eyes as I waved. "I'll see you all soon!" I
jumped out of River's car and waited for him at the trunk. It's opened na but I
can't lift it.
River met me at the back of his car. He lifted my bags and put them on the ground.
"I'm sorry he's not here."
"Me, too." I pulled him into a hug and I whispered to him. "Take care of your
douchebag brother."
River chuckled as he let me go. "Alright."

***
"Yap!" I yelled to get his attention. He was standing near the entrance.
He looked over his shoulder before facing me completely. "Oh, nasaan sila?" he
asked, looking around.
"I asked them to just drop me off. I can't handle too much drama right now," I
answered honestly. Shit. Baka he wanted to say goodbye to his brothers.
"So, shall we get inside?" he asked when he returned his eyes on me. Should we go
inside?
I looked back and saw faces I didn't know. No one was familiar. Wala yung hinahanap
ko.
"Gusto mo pa ba siyang hintayin? We still have a lot of time," he said.
And wait here for nothing? He didn't reply to my texts. He didn't answer my calls.
What was I supposed to do?
I shook my head. "Hindi na siguro."
"Then let's get inside." He put his luggage on top of mine. "Ako na diyan."
shook my head. "Hindi. It's okay. I can handle it."
He pushed me away from the cart. "Akin na. Dami pang arte," he said before he
started to push it.
I scowled at his back. "Fine. Yabang," I grumbled, following him.
"Cookie monster!"
"Achi Louisse!"
I stopped dead on my tracks. I whipped back and saw the two little hellions running
towards me. "Oh my gods-"
"Sige na. Mamaya na tayo pasok," I heard Yap said. He was standing behind me.
I didn't get to say anything to him. The two little hellions jumped on me and
hugged me on my middle.
"I thought we're never gonna see you again!" Bay said. Awww.. Shit. These two kids.
"We hate the traffic!" Ozi grumbled.
I dropped to my knees and hugged them both. I closed my eyes and inhale their
sweet, innocent scent. I'm gonna miss these kids.
"Sorry, I wasn't able to call or text. My phone is missing."
I opened my eyes and looked up. It was Kade. Instead of being pissed at him, he's
appearance made me grin. He's carrying two pink girly backpacks. Only his little
sisters can make him carry them.
"It's okay. You guys are here now," I said to him. I returned my gaze at her
sisters. "C'mon, give achi another hug," I said, opening my arms wide.
"Kisses too!" Bay said before the two attacked me with kisses.
"I'll be back, babies. Don't worry, achi's gonna come back," I told them when they
pulled away from the tight hug.
"When?" Bay asked. I don't know, baby girl.
"Soon," I answered with a smile.
"Bring gifts!" I nodded at her.
"Pasabubong!" Ozi
chimed in.
It made me giggle. "It's pasalubong, Ozi," I corrected her.
"Can I talk to your achi now?" Kade said, interrupting my moments with the kids.
"Yap, can you look at them for a sec?"
"Uh... sure," Yap said with an unsure expression. It almost made me laugh. Kaso the
guy who's standing in front of me pulled me away from them.
"Hey..." he said, standing only a single foot away from me.
I smiled at him. "Hi," I answered lamely.
"So, is this goodbye?" he asked. His sad tone made my heart squeeze tightly.
I shook my head."This is a... 'See you soon.'"
We just stared at each other for awhile. It was like we're memorizing each other's
faces. It feels like we're conversing with just our eyes. I hope he reads it in my
eyes that I will miss him so much-that I miss him already.
I hope he reads it in my eyes that I love him so much. And I hope what I read in
his eyes were accurate. My gods, I love you too, Ongpauco.
"God, I'll miss you, Salazar," he said all of a sudden.
My eyes started to well up. I bit my lip and shook my head. "Stop it or I'll cry,"
I said, my voice breaking.
"I won't mind," he said with a sad smile.
Just looking at him makes my heart soar and break at the same time. Ito yung
lalaking kinakainisan ko nung umpisa. He's the same guy who made my whole world
upside down. He's the same guy who made me fall in love with him.
It was him who saved me from my everything.

"Thank you for everything, Ongpauco," I said as I wiped a single tear that escaped
from my eyes. "I don't wanna cry anymore. Tell the kids-" I was about to look at
his sisters when Kade pulled me.
"Not so fast," I heard him say before his lips met mine. I closed my eyes and held
on to his hands that were holding my face. We kissed for a while. It was deep and
slow and sad.
It made my heart break even more.
"I'll see you soon," I said when I pulled away from our kiss.
Kade wiped my tears away with his fingers. "You better."
=================
Chapter 48: Leaked Videos
Chapter 48
Leaked Videos
I left my room and looked around the quiet apartment. There's no Yap playing on the
living room with the x-box. I continued to the kitchen and saw Asher sipping her
coke.
Yeah, this athletic chick has an unhealthy obsession with coke zero. Breakfast,
lunch, dinner, midnight snack... hindi sila makukumpleto without her coke zero fix.
"So, why is Yap not here? Nasaan yun?" I asked before sitting on the chair next to
her. Nakakapanibago talaga na the house is quiet. I guess I'm used to hearing
Asher's loud voice whenever she nags at Yap.
She shrugged. "Pinag check-in ko sa hotel."
What? Did I hear her right? "Uhm, why?" I asked, brows furrowed.
"Kasi ayokong makita pagmumukha niya," she answered back before calmly sipping on
her coke zero again.
That's not a real answer. "Again, why?"
She took a deep breath. I readied myself because I know what's next. Living with
Asher and Yap made me appreciate Kim and Jamie's way of bickering. Mas mahina
voices nila compared with Asher and Yap.
"Kasi nakakaimbyerna siya!!!" Asher bellowed.

Again, that is not an answer. "I don't wanna repeat the question, Asher."
She placed the can of coke zero on the table before rubbing her face with a single
hand. Her left arm and shoulder are still in cast. Her right arm is still injured
pero pinipilit niya kumilos all the time. We just let her be. "He's dating someone
new!" she grumbled.
Oh, tapos?
"And?"
She dropped her hands and glared at me. Whoa there.
"E diba may gusto siya sa akin?" she asked.
Oh. I get it. She's jealous.
"But you don't like him back, diba?" I countered back. "Oh, shit. No waaaaay. You
like him na!" I said with wide-eyes. That's why she's always nagging at him.
Gumaganti siya because she has been replaced.
She shook her head. "I don't."
I chuckled at her confused expression. "But you're being prissy about this. Akala
ko ba you're treating him as a brother. Parang incest if you two end together?" I
asked, reminding her of the things she said about the thought of them being
together.
"Ewan ko!" she huffed. "All I know is, nagseselos ako."
I grinned at her admission. "Well, at least you're honest about it."
She suddenly stood up from her seat, almost toppling it over. "Hindi ko lang alam
kung bakit ako nagseselos?" She started to pace on the kitchen floor. "I still see
him as my best friend... Pero inaamin ko may little something na because... I don't
know. One day, I just realized I'm starting to like him." She stopped and
immediately started fake gagging. "What the heck, kadiri tong lumalabas sa bibig
ko."
"Baka naman it's just your ego talking," I offered. If guys are very territorial,
girls can get jealous about almost everything.
She grabbed her chair and sat on it again. "Explain mo nga yan. Nabobo na naman ako
sa pagiging conyotic people mo."
"Well, you know Yap likes you even before. You got used to the idea. You got used
to him treating you like a princess." She got used to the idea na siya lang. I
leaned back on my chair but kept my eyes on her. "Kaya ngayong he
seemed to be moving on na with his love life, nagseselos ka. You were once the
apple-of-his-eye, ngayon nasa iba na yung attention."
Asher kept silent for a while, deep in thoughts.
"So you think, bruised ego lang to?" she asked, pouting.
I shrugged. "Yeah, maybe." I wouldn't know. She's the only one who could answer
that question.
"Pero kasi... I didn't expect it to hurt." She sighed and frowned. You can see that
it really hurt and bothered her.
"Or baka you really just suck at timings and you're in love with him now," I
offered with a grin, trying to lighten up the mood. Hindi ako sanay to see Asher
down and confused. She's full of energy and she's far from being quiet.
She stood up again. "Ah, bahala na. Baka ego-thing shit lang to."
"You're the only who knows the truth," I said.
"Yan ba natutunan mo sa shrink mo?" she asked as she walked towards the
refrigerator. She's probably taking another can of coke zero.
"It's common-sense, Ash."
"Kumusta na pala sessions mo? Any progress?" I looked at her way and saw her on her
hunches.
"Little progress," I answered before looking away. I hate it. Gusto ko nang
gumaling but I'm not really comfortable sharing my inner demons to her yet.
"Pero at least may progress diba?" She took the seat beside me again. "Napagdaanan
ko na yan. When I started rehab, I started talking to a therapist too. Pagdating sa
ganyan, hindi lang yung shrink mo yung makakatulong sa'yo. Mas importanteng
makatulong sayo ay ang sarili mo."
"Yeah, I know."
She popped open the can. "Dati kasi ako, nire-reject ko e.
Alam mo yun? Knee-jerk reaction mo mag-resist ng tulong."
I chuckled at her. "Trust me, I know. I tend to shut down people."
"Don't shut down your shrink. Pero kung hindi ka talaga kumportable sa kanya, hanap
ka ng iba. Importante diyan kasi trust e." She took a sip and I looked away from
her. Buti pa siya, she got passed on the huddle already. It's been weeks but I'm
still having a hard time talking to my therapist.
"You sound like an expert ha," I joked lamely.
"When it comes to trust, mahina ako sa ganun. Iilan lang napagbibigyan ko nun.
Minsan mali pa."
Natahimik kaming dalawa. "Gods, we're such drama-queens," I groaned loudly. It's
the first time Asher and I had a talk like this. Usually, saglit na drama lang on
Facetime. The dramas on her training camp, the dramas in my life... And now, we're
here.
She stood up once again, her coke zero in hand. "Tama na nga! Maligo ka na, aalis
tayo."
"Where are we going?" I asked, intrigued. I've been here in Singapore for weeks and
I haven't toured the city.
I know, shocker. I'm supposed to be the adventurous one and I'm just sulking here
in the apartment if I'm not in my therapist's office.
"Hindi tayo magmumukmok ngayong weekend. Magpapaganda tayo. Ubusin natin pera ni
Architect. Magshopping tayo, paganda. Ganon."
My eyes widened. "Hell no. Nakakahiya!"
The man I'm calling antichrist is the who's paying for my stay here and my sessions
with my therapist. It's too much! I don't want to spend his money on things that
aren't important.
Asher rolled her eyes. "Ligo na! Dami pang arte!"
She stomped her feet. "Kailangan natin to! Oplan paganda, balik-alindog, tanggal
split-ends, whatever you call it. Lika na!"
I shook my head once again. "Asher, ano ka ba!" I whined.
I leaned back on my seat when suddenly, Asher's face was just a few inches away.
"Two weeks ka nang nandito sa Singapore, L. Hindi ka ba nagsasawa dito sa
apartment? Ayaw mo ba gumala sa Sentosa? Ayaw mo mag Universal Studios? Kumustahin
si Madam Tussauds? Sa Underwater World chenes?"
Of course, I want to...
"Girl, nasaan ang pagiging adventurous mo? Huwag ka ngang chicken!"
***
"Do you know who she is?" I asked Asher as we walked hand in hand. We still haven't
decided where we're going later. But we're headed to the salon now.
"Si Stella Irizari."
I gasped when Stella Irizari's face flashed on my mind. "Wait a goddammit minute.
Stella Irizari?!" I screeched. "As in yung party girl slash model?" I asked in
disbelief.
She's Yap's new girl?!
"Yeah. Mas nakakapikon nung nalaman ko kung sino!" Asher started to spew venom.
"Alam mo ba sabi sakin dati ni Yap? Sabi niya nagustuhan niya ko kasi hindi ako
maarte, hindi ako pala make-up, sporty at cowboy. Simpleng-simple. Natural. Walang
arte!"
"Your point?" I asked.
"My point is, yung pinili niya ay super duper kabaliktaran ko!" she growled.
Okay. Chill. "Oo nga no?" I said out-loud. "She's a party-girl. Snooty. Always
fully made-up. Sobrang kabaliktaran mo nga." And she's wiiiild. For someone who's a
no non-sense man, it seemed impossible for Yap to be Stella's new beau!
"Nakakairita. I don't even know
what he sees in her," Asher continued to growled.
I chuckled at her chosen words. "Spoken like a true jealous ex-girlfriend."
"Except I was never his girlfriend," she immediately countered.

"Could've been," I shot back playfully.
She groaned. "Ugh. Parang sinasabi mo talagang kasalanan ko to."
I just shruuged. Anyway... "Alam ba ni Yap na we're outside?"
She rolled her eyes once again. "Paano niya malalaman kung nasa Pilipinas na siya?"
"WHAT?!"
"Yep. Lumayas si kupal. Hindi man lang nakpag-ayos, nag-send lang ng text na uuwi
na siya! King ina niya."
"Just like that?" I asked in disbelief. Kakaiba talaga silang dalawa!
"Yep. Just like that." I noticed Asher's voice sounded... hurt. "Hindi rin ako
makapaniwala. Hindi kami nag-aaway dati na aabot ng susunod na araw. Pero simula
nitong may bago na siya! Naku! Ang kupal!"
Ah, kaya pala. Kaya pala they're always arguing... hindi pa sila nagkakaayos ulit
and they were forced to be with each other now that Yap's moving on from her. No
wonder he left. He probably missed his new girl or Asher's antics were just too
much for him.
"Ugh. Nakakairita. Isang text lang ginawa para sabihing umuwi!" Asher blinked
furiously to fight of the tears. She won that battle. "Puro abs lang si gago,
walang kapuso-puso."
I stopped on our tracks and gave her a tight hug. "I missed you, Asher," I said to
her while chuckling.
"Sorry kung hindi kita nakakausap nitong last two weeks," she said as she hugged me
back. "Masyado akong caught-up sa away namin. Umabot ng two weeks! My golly, buti
hindi ka umalis din!" She pulled away from
our embrace. "Ano, kumusta ka nung two weeks na yun? Nyeta, I feel like a shitty
friend."
I laughed at her horrified expression. "Ano pa nga ba? Homesick."
She pouted. "Awww. Hirap yan. Tapos miss mo pa si Kade, for sure."
I glared at her. "Thanks for the reminder, bitch."
Yeah, I'm trying not to think about him as often as I can. It hurts being away from
him. It hurts that I can't do anything to speed up my therapy.
She stuck her tongue out. "Kumusta na yun? Kumusta kayo?"
"Last na nag-usap kami, nung sa airport," I admitted. She clearly didn't like my
answer when she gave me an irritated look. "Alam mo yun? Parang it was like a
silent agreement na hindi muna kami mag-uusap? It's kind of twisted because I don't
even know when I will get back."
And being a blunt that she is, Asher asked, "So in short, this is a break?"
"No." I sighed. "Maybe."
"Hindi parang katangahan yan?" she asked with an eye-roll.

I chuckled at her expressions. Kahit kalian she's too transparent. She's a mix of
Kim and Jamie. Gods. I miss my best friends.
"Yes, in a way. Pero I see it as a trust exercise. If he really loves me, he

wouldn't do something stupid-avenge me or cheat on me whatever." I pointed at my
chest. "Same goes for me. While I'm here, healing and trying to build-up a better
version of myself, siya pa rin. I wouldn't do things that he wouldn't want me to
do."
"Pano ka naman nakakasigurado na magiging faithful si Kade?"
"I know he wouldn't do those things because he made a promise to me," I answered
simply. I have tested him over and over
again. There are times he failed, he's not perfect. But every time he fails, he
makes up for it and it brings out a much better result.
"I hope he proves you right."
"I hope so too."
Asher linked arms with me again. "Habang nandito tayo sa Singapore, parehas tayong
magpapagaling. Tulungan tayo. Para pag balik natin sa Pilipinas, okay na tayo."
I nodded.
"How's your shoulder pala? Alam mo na ba gagawin mo after the rehab?" I asked,
eyeing the cast on her arm and shoulder.
"Tulad mo, baby steps lang muna din ako," she answered with a laugh. She pointed
somewhere. I looked at the direction she pointed. It was a salon. "Girl, ito na
yung salon na sinasabi ko."
"Hindi ba tayo magtatagal diyan?" I asked, eyeing the signage. I cringe at the
girly interior the salon have. Pink walls, pink chairs, pink uniforms for the
employees.
"Hindi yan. Pero magpapakasaya tayo, bitch," she said before dragging me towards
the girly salon.
***
"AY PUTANG INA?!?!?" I rolled my eyes and continued on reading my newest favorite
book, Huntley Fitzpatrick's My Life Next Door. "Hoy, babae! Nagmura na ako lahat-
lahat dito, wapakels ka lang diyan?" I heard her yell loudly once again.
"That's your normal, Asher," I said, my eyes still trained at the book in my hands.
For the last two months of being with Asher (including the two-week stay of Yap
here), walang ibang ways of communication si Asher but to yell. No matter how far
or near she is, she's still gonna yell like we're oceans apart.
They said time flies when you're having fun. The time flew by. Two weeks
turned to two months. I wasn't happy though. I missed home. I missed my life in the
Philippines. I missed the people I left there, my parents, my friends and Kade.
But I can't dwell on the sad and depressing thoughts. I was sent here to heal and
I'm gonna come back healed... or close to being one. Basta I wanted to come back
with as a better Louisse.
And improved version of myself.
"Girl! May tsismis about you from Pinas!"
I groaned. "Ano na naman daw?" I asked looking up.
"Nabuntis ka daw ni Cascade at magpapalaglag ka daw dito sa Singapore!"
That made me laugh. That won't be possible. Lalo na't I'm sexually-inactive for
almost six months na.
"I know, right?" Asher said, laughing. "Baka yung mga tarantadong rapist nagpakalat
nitong tsismis na to."
That made me stop for a minute. "Asher..." I said, warning in my tone. Like I said,
I'm in the process of healing and even if I have been healed, I don't think I will
ever be comfortable talking about that night Andrew and I got roofied.
"HOLY SHIT!!!" she yelled once again.
I sighed. "Ano na naman?"
"There's a leaked video! Leaked video mo!"
WHAT?!
I dropped my book and jumped off the sofa. I ran towards the kitchen and took a
seat next to her. "Ha? How? Akala ko ba-my gods. I thought it was already deleted!"
"I thought they already destroyed the evidences!" I said as the panic started to
rise.
"WHAT THE FROG!!! TEN VIDEOS?!!!" she screamed, her eyes wild.
I gasped. "What?! Paanong naging ten?!" I asked, confused. "Let me see!" I grabbed
her iPad but she swatted my
hand away.
"May phone ka diba?!"
I slapped her hand in return. "Diba nag-deactivate ako ng Facebook? Diba naka-off
yung phone ko?" I grabbed her iPad once again. "Just give me your phone! I'm dying
over here!"
She let me this time. I took a deep breath before looking at the screen. My brain
short-circuited when I saw what's the headline in a showbiz rag.
FORMER QUARTERBACK AND HIS EX'S PRIVATE VIDEOS LEAKED!
"AY! Tanga lang!" Asher gasped. "May nag leak ng private vlogs niyo!"
"Holy tacos..." I said, my whole being sagged in relief. "I thought it's the video
those motherfuckers took."
"Ako din! Ang bobo natin. Shet." Asher facepalmed herself. "But thank God, ito
lang."
"But still, this is an invasion of privacy."
"Unless si Kade ang nag-leak?" Asher said.
I glared at her. "Why the heck would he do that?"
She rolled her eyes, as if the answer is too obvious. "Para bakuran ka? Para
ipagsigawan sa mundo na taken ka na at sa kanya ka lang?"
I scoffed. "That's ridiculous! Hindi ganun si Kade."
She took her phone out from her pocket and shoved it in my direction. "Bakit hindi
mo tawagan siya gamit phone ko? Nang magkaalaman na!"
I shook my head. "Asher, I know what you're doing." I glared at her. "I told you,
diba? I will only call him kapag okay na ako."
Asher raised her palms up in surrender. "Fine. Pero dapat magmukha kang okay na.
Ipaalam mo sa lahat na okay ka."
"No."
"Mag-start ka mag vlog ulit! Para makita naman ni Kade na healthy ka and yung new
hair cut mo! Dapat makita ka niya!" she said,
clapping her not-so-injured hand on the table.
"Ayoko."
"Sige. Bahala ka. Ako na lang magfi-film sa'yo kapag tulog ka na. Tapos ia-upload
ko sa Facebook," Asher sing-songed creepily. It made the hairs on the back of my
neck stood up!
"You wouldn't dare!" I gasped.
"You wouldn't want to test me," she said with a Cheshire grin. She can be really
creepy when she wanted to.
I glared at her. "You're an evil woman."
"I know, right?" she said before shoving me out of my seat. "Oh bilis na. mag-ayos
ka na para makapag-record ka na."
"I'm going to do it today?!" I said, horrified.
She nodded. "Oo naman. No time like the present! KILOS NA!" I cringe as she yelled
at me like a drill-sergeant.
***
"Ay, wow. Natapos din siya mag-ayos. Akala ko mauuna pa dumating menopause ko bago
ka matapos e," Asher said as soon as I left my bedroom.
I stuck my tongue out. "You're so OA."
Buti nga. I will never record a vlog without my make-up. That's just self-sabotage.
"WHAT THE FRAK!!!!!!"

I rolled my eyes. What's got her panties in a twist na naman? "Ano na naman?!"
"May bagong upload sa channel mo! Kakaloka! Nag-notify sa email ko!"
"What?!"
I ran towards lang. there's only one person other than Asher and I who knows my
password. That person is the only one who could post a video on my Youtube channel.
Before I even got to Asher, I heard his voice. She must've played it already.
"Hi, Salazar. You probably know by now that our private-emphasis on the private-
videos were leaked." I stood on Asher's back and stared at Kade's annoyed
face. He's in his room and it looked like he just woke up. Damn. I missed that sexy
look. He can really pull-off the bed hair.
"I'm sorry. It's my fault." He's blaming himself once again. "Remember the day you
left? My phone went missing that day and I still haven't seen it." I sighed. It
wasn't his fault naman. Someone's just fucking up with us. "Just punch me when you
come back, okay?"
I chuckled at his smirking face. I miss him so fucking much.
His eyes softened, as if it was really talking to me in person. "My friends will
probably give me shit for this. But-I fucking miss you."
***
I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. I clicked on the red button on the
screen and smiled.
"Hey, Ongpauco. I'm coming home soon," I said to the camera with a smile.
"With moi!!!" Asher yelled behind me. The ex-athlete turned nutcase video-bombed
me.
I shook my head as I tapped the red button to stop the camera from recording.
***
There's a knock on my door followed by Asher's loud voice. "May package nga palang
dumating para sa'yo."
I jumped out of bed and ran towards the door. I opened it and saw the small parcel
on Asher's hand.
"Gimme! Gimme!" I yelled like an excited kid on Christmas eve.
She handed over and I immediately ripped the side. I peered inside and laughed at
what I saw.
"Ano laman? Bakit ang lakas ng tawa mo dyan?" Asher asked. Tsismosa as ever.
"Star Margarine tsaka wedding invitation," I answered.
"Kaninong wedding?" she asked with a frown.
"Sa best friend ko, si Jamie," I answered with a grin.
Man, they're gonna married! Totoo na to! In just two months of being engaged,
they're gonna get married!
"Ay ikakasal na dun sa kapatid ni Yappie?" Asher said, surprised. "Naunahan ka na

maging Ongpauco ni ateng! Kailangan mo na talaga umuwi!"
I nodded and laughed once again. Shiz. I really love it when I hear a good news!
"We're gonna come back sooner than they expected," I said. My mind suddenly was
filled with certain person's smirking face.
"Yep. Parang hindi naman ramdam na umalis ka e."
I'm coming home, Ongpauco.
=================
Chapter 49: Welcome Home
Chapter 49
Welcome Home
"Baka tayo naman ang ma-surprise nito, Louisse," Asher said. I turned away from the
window and looked at her.
"With what naman?" I asked with a frown. I think the Nega Queen title suits her
more now. Something about Asher changed. She's still the same old heckler I know
but now... she's got more angst.
I can't say I blame her though. Her dreams were snatched away from her. She can't
play the sport she had loved all her life. Her left shoulder and arm are still in
cast. She's practically a disabled now. I hope she finds her new place in the world
after she recovers fully.
Asher shrugged. "I don't know. Baka mamaya may sausage fest pala sa apartment niyo
pagpunta natin."
That made me burst into laughter. "Nah. That will never happen," I said, shaking my
head. "For one, my best friends are too innocent for their own good."
"Pero ikakasal na yung isa," Asher reminded me about Jamie.
I nodded. "Still. I know Jamie doesn't know what sausage fest means." I really
doubt it. "Tsaka the only guy friends they have are Ongpaucos."
Asher's face distorted in disgust. "Eww. Sagwa nga naman mag-sausage fest
magpipinsan." She faked gagged. "Kadiri! Incest!"
But Asher was right. We were surprised when we walked inside the apartment. I
should've knocked but I still live there at nasa akin ang house keys ko.
I really thought we are the ones who's gonna surprise them.
But I was dead wrong.
There was no sausage fest. Only a tonsil-hockey match between the soon-to-be-
married
couple on the living room couch.
"Ay! Hala siya!" I heard Asher sputtered beside me.
Jamie and River stilled and both looked up. Jamie's eyes widened when she
recognized me. She pushed her body up and jumped out of the couch.
"OH MY GODS! L!!!" she squealed as she run towards. I met her halfway and we both
hugged each other tightly. My gods. I miss this weird chick. She pulled away from
me and was about to kiss me on the cheek when I jumped away from her.
"Hey," I palmed her forehead to stop her from kissing me. "Don't kiss me. I don't
know where your lips went," I said to her with a my head shaking. I'm serious. It's
weird seeing her make-out with River tapos hahalikan niya ako?
Jamie scowled. "We just made-out! Hindi ko naman siya blinow-job!"
I choked and then laughed at her not-so-innocent train of thought. Holy tacos.
River really have corrupted my best friend.
Jamie and I looked at River when he appeared beside her. "Baby, TMI," he whispered
to her.
Jamie's cheeks reddened. She turned to me with an embarrassed expression on her

face. "Oops. Sorry." She leaned her head towards River's chest when he wrapped his
arm around her shoulder. "Pero promise, second base lang."
I choked once again. Akala ko okay na! "My gods, you haven't changed a bit!" I said
with a chuckle.
Jamie jumped on me and hugged me again. "Namiss kita ng sobra-sobra!" She pulled
away slightly. Her eyes widened as she touched my hair. "Oh my gods! Nagpagupit ka!
Bagay sa'yo!" She grabbed my face and her eyes roamed arounf it. "Mas gumanda ka!
You look healthier! You
look-You look happy!" she said, almost choking up.
I smiled at her. "Of course, I'm happy! I'm home now and nakahabol ako a day before
you guys get married!" I exclaimed as I discreetly touched Jamie's swollen tummy
under her baggy shirt.
River showed me his reserved smile. "It was nice of you to come back for our
wedding."
"I told you guys, I wouldn't miss it for the world," I answered smiling back at
them.
I heard a horrible fake cough behind me. Shiz, I forgot Asher's with me!
I looked over my shoulder and motioned for her to come closer to us. "Jamie, River,
this is Asher Flores," I said, starting my introduction. "She's the friend lived
with in Singapore." I looked back at Asher and pointed at my old friends. "Ash,
this is Jamie Navarro, my best friend. That's her soon-to-be-husband, River
Ongpauco."
Asher smiled at them. "Cascade's brother?" she asked River when they shook hands.
"She knows?" Jamie asked River, ignoring the hand Asher offered her.
Uh-oh. Fuck.
River ignored his fiancé and he answered Asher. "One of many, yes."
Asher just nodded and dropped her hand to her side.
"Speaking of Kade, does he know you're here?" Jamie suddenly asked.
I shook my head. "Nope-"
She looked back at River. "River, baby. Tawagan mo nga si Kade. Tell him his
girlfriend is here." I didn't miss the way she put an emphasis on the word
'girlfriend'. What the heck is going on?
"Anyway, may gagawin pa kami sa kwarto ni River. Magpahinga na muna kayo tapos
chika later?" Jamie started to drag River towards her room and we just watched them
leave.
"It
was nice meeting you, Ashley!" I heard Jamie yelled before slamming her door
closed.
"Hindi ata ako trip ng best friend mo," Asher said beside me.
I sighed. That's what I gathered too. "Don't mind her." I can't tell her Jamie's
just hormonal because she's pregnant. It wasn't my secret to tell and as far as I
know, her pregnancy is still a secret.
***
I groaned at Asher's grossed-out face. "Asher, don't be silly! Maluwag yung kama!"
I reasoned with her, pointing at my queen-sized bed.
She shook her head. "Nah. Grabe kaya yung sexual tension niyo ni Kade. I'm so sure,
marami kayong ginawa sa kwartong to. I'd rather sleep on the couch than lie down on
that bed."
But it had been months ago since Kade and I had sex on this bed! Tsaka the sheets
have been washed and changed for so many times already. Kung magkakaroon ng bakas
or memories about the nights we fucked on that bed, they're only on my mind.
"It's just a bed, Asher," I deadpanned.
But Asher already made up her mind.
She pointed at the bed. "It's where the magic happens, Louisse!" she said to me in
a way na parang she's talking to a kid who has special needs. "At ayoko sa mga
magic na parang fireworks kung pumutok, okay?"
Ugh. Dirty images get out of my head.
She can't sleep on my bed but she can sleep on the couch after seeing two people
dry-humped there? "Ahhh, but we just saw Jamie and River made -out on the couch
earlier."
"Second base nga lang daw diba." Asher shrugged. "Keri lang sakin yun. Di ko talaga
kayang humiga sa kama mo kasi daig niyo pa ni
Kade and energizer bunnies."
She's kind of right with the energizer bunnies thing, though.
I rolled my eyes. "If that's what you really want, fine." I'm too tired from our
byahe, I can't deal with her stubbornness right now.
"LOUISSE SALAZAR! MAY BISITA KA!!!"
Asher and I exchanged looks after hearing Jamie's loud announcement from the living
room.
"Tignan mo nga kung sino yun." I said to Asher even though I knew deep in my heart
who it was. My heart started to beat wildly remembering the last time I held him in
my arms, the last time I kissed him. That was two months ago.
I watched Asher shrugged before she left my room.
There's only one person who entered my mind when Jamie told me I have a visitor.
He's here because Jamie asked River to call him. He probably drove over the speed
limit.
And I was correct.
I heard Asher's loud voice. "Cascade!" "Aba naman! Ang pogi-pogi mo pa rin!"
I shook my head and chuckled at Asher's wild unfiltered reaction. I turned to my

vanity mirror and eyed my reflection.
Alam ko he wouldn't get surprised seeing me after two months. Napanuod niya yung
ten-seconds video namin ni Asher that I uploaded on my Youtube channel two days
ago.
I gingerly touched my short hair. I still haven't got used to it. I think the last
time I got my hair cut short, high school pa yata. I loved my long hair. It was
more of a security blanket to me.
Kade loves playing with my hair. Kaya siguro ako kinakabahan. Because some of the
old things I changed about me, minahal ni Kade. Baka may mali akong naalis.
Shiz.
You're just nervous.
It's just hair. Kung ano man ang nabago sa akin sa dalawang buwan na nawala ako, I
know those changes were for the better. Because that's what I aimed for... a better
Louisse. I may not be totally healed but at least I made progress and I will
continue my therapy here.
I have shorter hair and healthier look. My body-especially my limbs are toned. I
have a wider smile and lighter aura, too.
But I can still see traces of the old Louisse. The guarded eyes, the stubborn chin
lift. I can still pull-off a pokerface and a mean resting bitch face.
What I'm working on right now is building up courage. Now is the perfect time to
practice not running away. I'm scared shitless. I'm terrified. But I know it's only
natural to feel this. Hindi kami nagkita at nag-usap directly for two months.
I'm terrified. So terrified.
Why?
Because today, Kade and I will have the clean-slate we both asked for.
I took a deep breath and squared my shoulders. I slowly walked towards my bedroom
door. I grabbed and twisted the doorknob to open it. When I pulled it open, the
first thing that I saw was Jamie's murderous face.
I followed where her eyes were directed and almost let out a groan.
I have a feeling Jamie and Asher won't be hitting off any sooner.
Asher was hugging Kade and he's hugging her back and Jamie doesn't like it. Because
for her, ako lang dapat ang nakayakap kay Kade ngayon and Jamie's trust with Kade
is literally non-existent.
There was the Sabrina Sarte thing and she still probably thought Kade didn't go to
the airport
two months ago. I'm gonna set it straight to her later na lang.
We all jumped when someone's phone rang. It was Jamie's.
"Uh-oh!" I heard her say before answering the call. "Hello, Tito Joel Salazar!"
Jamie greeted awkwardly the caller... aka my father.
"Hehe. Opo. Totoo po yung post ko sa Facebook," she said sheepishly. Jamie looked
up and saw me. She just gave me an apologetic smile.
I smacked my forehead. They didn't know I was gonna come home today! I was planning
to surprise them in the hospital sana later!
"Okay po. Sasabihin ko po sa kanya na puntahan ka niya sa ospital. Now na. ASAP,"
she answered back.
I rolled my eyes. Papa probably knows I'm listening to them talk right now.
Turning my head to the side, my eyes caught his. He smiled at me and I smiled
back...awkwardly.
Asher was on the couch now, talking to River and to a scowling Jamie. I looked back
at Kade and noted he's too dressed up. White polo shirt, khaki pants, boat shoes.
Anong meron?
I sighed as I walked towards him. "Talk to you later?" I asked when I got close to
him.
Kade nodded. "In your room?"
"I left my bedroom window unlocked," I whispered.
"See you later then," he whispered back.
I showed him a tight-lipped smile before leaving the apartment.
No hugs. No kisses. Not a single touch.
Bakit ang awkward? Should I have stayed and talked to him for a while? Should I
have been initiated a hug or a kiss? Should I have made the first move?
Pero Papa just called and he practically demanded to Jamie na papuntahin ako sa
hospital ASAP. I know my priorities now. My parents
come first over everything else, including Kade.
***
Hindi ako pinagalitan.
My parents received me well. They both hugged me tightly and made me promise not to
leave abruptly again. I cried to them and told them I wouldn't do it again.
I wouldn't do everything that I did in the past just to get back on them.
I don't wanna get hurt. I don't wanna hurt anyone, especially those who are
important to me.
We spent the whole afternoon talking about my brief stay in Singapore. I made an
excuse para hindi makapagkwento about my supposed work. I told them I left because
it was lonely to live with only one Filipino friend. I told them I got homesick a
lot. I told them I missed them terribly.
They were pleased to hear me talk freely. They were pleased to see me less guarded.
It pleased me that they're seeing me like this, happy and healthy.
Mama and I are sitting on opposite sides of papa's hospital bed.
"Kumusta naman ang Singaporean boys?" Mama suddenly asked after we cleaned up. We
just finished eating our merienda. I sneaked in two pizza boxes. Vegetarian pizza
for papa and meatlovers for me and mama.
Papa scowled. "Oo nga, bu. Tell me, did anyone made a pass at you there?" he asked,
his over-protectiveness despite his condition made my heart squeeze. I will always
be his little girl.
I shook my head. "Wala, papa. If I'm not working," Working as in 'in therapy'. "I'm
just in the apartment watching my favorite TV shows or reading novels. My life in
Singapore is too boring."
"Oo nga pala, bubu.
I forgot to tell you," I looked up at mama and waited for her to continue. "Yung
ex-boyfriend mo? Si Cascade, he's always visiting us here."
What? He did? Seriously?
"Ex-boyfriend? Akala ko ba manliligaw mo yun?" Papa asked incredulously.
"Mama!" I groaned. Ang ingay niya talaga kung minsan! "Papa. I told you before, we
dated dati diba?" I said, trying to talk my way out of it. I honestly can't
remember what I told them about Kade before.
Papa scratched the back of his head. "Nakalimutan ko na! Pero ang alam ko talaga
manliligaw siya dapat sa'yo."
I heard mama's contagious laughter. "Ex-boyfriend or ex-manliligaw, it doesn't

matter. What matters is, bubu's back at alam nang anak natin na hindi nagbago si
Cascade."
"Whatever," papa grunted.
I chuckled at his response. It made me realize no matter how good a guy is, no one
will ever measure up to him because his standards for his daughter is too damn
high.
And I guess that's actually a great thing.
Because I think I've found the guy who will measure up to him.
***
It was eight in the evening when I got home. Asher's already sleeping on the couch
and Jamie and River seemed to be holed up in her room. Wala akong balita where Kim
is. She's probably in Pampanga. I better ask Jamie tomorrow.
I walked towards my bedroom door and opened it slowly. I didn't lock my room when I
left earlier. Nasa loob kasi yung mga gamit ni Asher and I'm too rattled earlier to
think of locking my bedroom door.
Speaking of rattled, nasa loob na kaya yung dahilan why I
got rattled earlier?
Well, there's only one way to find out.
I walked inside my bedroom. Despite the darkness, I saw his silhouette. He was
seated on his side of my bed. I know I should've been scared. But I wasn't. I know
it's him.
You know that feeling? Yung kahit nakatalikod siya... nasa dilim or nasa malayo,
you know it's him because you know him too well. That's exactly what I'm feeling
right now.
I just know. I'd now him anywhere.
And let's not forget the fact that I asked him earlier to talk to me here. I even
told him the window is not locked.
I watched his silhouette reached for bedside lamp and seconds later, I found myself
staring at Kade's handsome face. Fuck. I missed that face.
"Hi," he greeted me with a small smile.
I smiled at him too. "Hi."
"Sit with me?" he asked as he patted on my bed.
I sat beside him. "So... Did you like what I sent to you last week?" he asked.
I frowned and just stared at him. He had sent me something? "I'm lost, Ongpauco." I
shook my head. Wala akong maalalang package sa akin except the-
I gasped. "Shiz! You're the one who sent the wedding invitation and the Star
Margarine?" I asked, my eyes almost popping out of their sockets.
Kade tsked. "Didn't you read the return address?"
I shook my head. I was too excited seeing the package and when I peeked inside, I
immediately thought it came from Jamie. I mean, she's the only one who would send
me a wedding invitation and she (and Kim) knows about my Star Margarine addiction.
Yep. It's kind of my kryptonite.
Kade chuckled. "I learned
about it from your parents."
Of course, kanino niya pa ba malalaman? I sighed. "They told me you always visit
them."
He shrugged. "They're important to you."
And with that, I'm reminded of all the things Kade did for me. It all flashed in my
head, too fast and too many for me to cling on every memory. But I'm thankful all
the same.
I took his hand and squeezed it. "Thank you, Kade," I said to him as I stared at
our hands.
"For the Star Margarine?" he asked, squeezing my hands back after intertwining his
fingers with mine.
I looked up at his face and saw him staring at me. "Not just that. I'm grateful for
you, for everything you did for me," I said with utmost sincerity.
Kade raised our hands and he kissed the back of mine. "Anything," he said as he put
our hands back on his lap.
"So... How are you?" I asked. I want us to catch up on each other's lives.
Kade's free hand shot up and I watched it pick up strands of my hair. Ngayon niya
lang siguro napansin that I cut my hair short. "I'm good. The kids are good."
"Do you like it? My short hair?" I asked, I'm starting feel self-conscious.
His lips tilted. "I love it. It suits you."
I frowned. "Really? Bakit parang ngayon mo lang napansin?" I can't help but ask. He
wasn't shocked when the lights went on. Maybe it's because of the video I posted
days before.
"I was just staring at your face," he answered simply.
His honesty made me blush. I can't remember the last time I blushed but I know it
was probably around him too. "Because you missed my face?" I teased when I
recovered.
"That,
too," he answered with a smirk, as if he knows what I was still reeling at his
words. My eyes left his lips and it went to his hand on my hair. I watched his hand
played with my hair. He twirled it around his fingers before gently tugged it.
I looked up and remembered the last time we were this close in a bed. He was crying
because of what happened to me. I was crying because he was blaming himself. It
wasn't fair.
"You didn't do anything... stupid?" I asked, remembering the promise I asked him to
make.
Kade dropped his hand and looked away from me. "I wish I had," he muttered.
I grabbed his chin and made him look back at me. "Kade, elaborate," I said, my tone
laced with warning. As much as I don't want to hear him say he broke his promise, I
still wanted-deserved to know the truth straight from him.
Kade sighed. "You know why you had to leave?"
"They said it was my alibi," I looked down and shrugged. I don't know why I didn't
ask for more information that.
"Mine is my family. Andrew's alibi is New York."
My eyes shot back at him. "He left too?" I asked in disbelief. Why didn't I know
this?
Kade nodded. "Yeah. He wanted to stay but his dad was adamant. Just like you, he
had no choice."
I swallowed loudly. "And the others?"
"Some of them left, too. Yap plays for the soccer team. His training and games are
his alibis. Lake has night classes with his MBA. River has Jamie and his career."
"Why do we need alibis, Kade?" I asked. It's something that was bothering me from
the start but I opted not to ask it. But now, it feels like I need
to know the answer straight from him.
"So we wouldn't get involved," he answered simply.
I frowned. "But we're all involved."
He shook his head. "Not this time."
"What do you mean?" I asked, my head is starting to spin from the confusion.
"They're all dead."
"What?" I gasped. "Who's dead?" Did I hear him right? 'They're all dead?' Who's
'they?'
"Shalvis and his friends. They're dead."
"What? How? Why?" I sputtered.
Kade looked away and shrugged. "I don't know the specifics. Dad just told me
everything is taken care of."
"And that means they're all dead?" I should be horrified but I wasn't. "What about
their families? What are they doing now?" I asked, terrified at the possibility of
their families press charges. We're all involved. Kahit na anong sabihin nila
architect at general, we're all involved. We all just have strong and airtight
alibis.
Kade sighed. "I don't know what my dad and general did but their families are
silent."
They're all dead. Shalvis is dead. But how? How did he die? How did they kill him?
How did they kill them? Did they do the exact same thing those scums did to us? Did
they drug them too? I hope so.
I honestly don't really care if they're dead. They're probably rotting in hell
right now, anyway. But I wanna know exactly what happened to them. Am I being too
morbid?
I'm in the process of healing and I never claimed to be a good person before. I
wanted to be better. Is apathy a bad thing to feel? Does apathy makes a huge dent
on my progress?
I'm relieved knowing some people took the law into their own hands... Does that
makes me a horrible person?
Both of us were silent for a solid minute. It was me who broke the silence.
I turned to look at him and ask. "What now?"
Kade stared at me straight in the eyes, his gaze unwavering as always. "Are we
still going to take things slow?" he shot back.
He still wants me back. That made me smile.
"Slow, fast... I don't care, as long as it's with you," I said with a reckless
shrug. But we both know I wasn't feeling as nonchalant as I look.
I was laying my heart on the line.
Kade reached his hands to me and grabbed me on my waist. I willingly went to him
went he made me straddle his lap. "Welcome home," he whispered after burying his
face on my neck. I wrapped my arms and legs around him tightly. I rest my cheek on
top of his head and inhaled his familiar scent, a mixture of his unique, natural
manly scent, his cologne, his fabric conditioner and his after-shave.
And for the first time in two months, I felt the calmness that I never knew I
craved.
I was home.
=================
Chapter 50: Calculated Risk
Chapter 50
Calculated Risk
Kade left an hour before midnight. He had to leave because he needed to check on
his mom and little sisters. But before he left, he made me promise to visit them
after everything has settled down. I agreed. I miss the little girls and I wanted
to see his mom, too. He visited my parents just because he wanted to not. Why don't
I do same, right? I didn't even ask for him to do that.
After he left, I cleaned up and decided to talk to Asher. There are some things
that I wanted to talk to her about. Hindi ko masabi kay Kade because I know he
wouldn't talk about it more. He doesn't want me to know anymore than I already do.
Ayoko din naman.
Kade doesn't want to talk about it anymore. But I have to let this out. Because I'm
gonna get crazy. Not that I'm concerned with their lives or their death. I'm more
concerned if what happened will blow up in our faces in the future.
I leaned over and gently slapped Asher's sleeping face. "Asher?"
Asher woke up with a start. "Yo!" she yelled when she sat up. She clutched on her
chest when she saw me hovering over her. "Uy, tangina. Wag ganun! Ginulat mo ko!"
she wheezed.
I chuckled at her disheveled appearance. "How am I supposed to wake you up if I

didn't call your name?"
She glared at me. "Edi sana hinintay mo ko magaising." She raked both hands through
her hair. "Shit. Akala ko talaga nalaglag ako sa building," she mumbled. "Ano bang
meron?"
I sat next to her. "Kade and I had a talk..." I started.
Asher sighed. "Buti naman.
Mas nabadtrip ata sakin yung best friend mo nung hindi kayo nakapag-usap ni Kade
kanina," she said, her lips pouting in disappointment.
I cringed. Hindi talaga maganda yung pinapakita ni Jamie sa kanya. Pregnant or not,
there's no excuse for being rude sa taong walang ginawa sa kanya and kakakilala pa
lang niya. "Sorry about that. I'll talk to her tomorrow."
"And please tell her 'Asher' ang pangalan ko at hindi 'Ashley'. She keeps on
calling me 'Ashley' kahit ilang beses na namin siya tinama ng jowa niya." She shook
her head in disgust.
I frowned. "I'm so sorry. May topak lang talaga yun." I wish I could say Jamie's
preggers but it's not my secret to tell and again, it's not a good excuse.
"Kebs." She shrugged. "Anyway, ano na? Matutulog pa ko. Spluk mo na yan."
My frowned deepened. "Spluk?"
She sighed once again. "Spluk! Sabihin. Ikwento. Go!"
Oh. Okay.
I have to tell her about the dead assholes. "Kade told me they're dead."
"They? Sinong they?" Asher asked, confused.
"Sila Shalvis."
Her eyes widened and her jaw dropped. "Oh my what the frog! Yung mga putang amang-
umph!!!" I immediately covered her mouth with both hands.
I forgot na si Asher nga pala ang kausap ko and gods, she never reacts silently!
"Shh! You're gonna wake them up!" I hissed at her.
She removed my hands away from her mouth. "They're dead?! Paano?" she asked,
ignoring my warning.
I slapped her in her arm. She covered her mouth with her own hand. "I don't know
the specifics and honestly, I don't want to know the specifics too!"
She leaned
away from me, shocked. "Pero hindi ka ba naku-curious?" She waited for me to
respond and I just shook my head. "Really? Hindi? Hindi ka naku-curious pano sila
pinatay? Like how? Kinidnap ba sila? Binaril ba sila? Sinalaky ng riding-in-tandem?
Sinong tumegi ka sa kanila mismo? May inutusan ba sila? Or sila mismo gumawa?"
Asher blabbed.
I shook my head once again. "I don't want to know." I really don't want to know.
"I'm just relieved that they're gone. Hindi naman sila kawalan sa mundo." And who
knows? Baka marami na silang sinamantala or sasamtalahin sa future.
Asher bit her lower lip, thinking. "Hindi naman siguro involved sa pagpatay yung
magkakapatid no? Sina Kade, Yap, River at yung isa pa?" she asked, concerned. I
know she's more concerned with her best friend than the three others.
"I don't think so." I hope not. Really. "Isa pa, I made Kade promise diba? Tsaka
may mga pamilya silang madadamay."
Both Asher and I gasped when we both realized something. Our families.
"Shit! Speaking of pamilya, paano kapag balikan kayo ng families nila?" Asher
started to freak out. "Pano kung-" I covered her mouth once again.
I shook my head and hissed at her. "Hindi ko alam! Basta Kade told me okay na. It's
done and it looks like they have leverage against their families. I think the
Cajucoms and the Ongpaucos used the full extent of their power and connections."
She removed my hands from her mouth. "Shit. Ano ba tong pinasok natin?" She pulled
her hair like a lunatic as she groaned. "Why do we have to love these Ongpauco
boys?"
"You slipped," I teased when I caught
her slip.
"Oh." Her eyes widened before she shook her head. "Gaga! Love ko naman talaga si
Yap! Love bilang kapatid!" she clarified.
I rolled my eyes at her failed attempt to back-pedal. "Umamin ka na sakin dati,

diba? You were falling for him na."
"'Were!' Past tense! Naudlot! Di natuloy! Tapos na!" she shot back defensively.
"Wow. You're so defensive, Ashley."
"Ugh. Asher ang pangalan ko."
We both ended up sighing and fell into silence. Parehas yata kaming napaisip sa mga
napag-usapan at sa mga nangyari. Maybe we're both scared at the endless
possibilities in the future.
"Gods. Remind me not to mess with any of the Ongpaucos," I said with a sigh.
***
"Shemay! Totoo ngaaaa!!!" "You're here!"
I woke up with a start. Damn, sinong ang aga-agang sisigaw sa bagong gising? I
scrubbed my face with my palms before opening my eyes. I squinted against the harsh
sunlight. Bakit hindi niya isara yung pinto?
"Huy, L!" the intruder waved her hand in my face. I blinked twice before I
recognize who she is.
"Uy, Kim!" I said as I stood up and wrapped my arms around her shoulders.
"Aymithyurrr!" I said to her but ended up slurring.
Kim reciprocated the hug. "Inaantok ka pa!" she chastised as she giggled. "You're
grumbling!"
I yawned. "Sabi ko, I missed you!" I pulled away from her slightly.
"Kahapon ka lang talaga dumating? Bakit hindi kayo tumawag!" I shrugged. Her words
didn't really penetrate my head. Damn it. I'm still sleepy and too sore. Why and
how did I end up sleeping in the couch? Nakaupo pa ko! "Kung hindi ko pa nakita
yung
post ni J sa FB, hindi ko malalaman!"
"Nakapatay pa rin phone ko," I answered absent-mindedly. Teka. Where was she
yesterday? Hindi ko pa natatanong kay J yun. Might as well ask her na. "Where were
you pala?"
"Nasa Pampanga. Namiss na daw ako ni Daddy e," she answered as her eyes darted to
the sofa. Her eyes widened when she saw Asher. "Oh! Hi!"
Shiz! Asher's here nga pala! I smacked my forehead before I started introducing
them to each other. "Oh, sorry! Kim, this si Asher Flores. She's the one I'm with
sa Singapore."
"Hello! Kumusta?" Kim smiled and waved at Asher. "I'm Kim Talavera. Roommate slash
best friend ni L."
Asher stood up and smiled back. "Hi! I'm good. Nice meeting you, Kim."
Kim scowled at me. "Dito kayo natulog sa sala? Bakit hindi mo siya pinatulog sa
kama, L?!"
I rolled my eyes. "Ayaw niya matulog sa kama ko," I answered vaguely. She doesn't
need to know kung bakit ayaw ni Asher matulog sa kama ko.
"Bakit?" Of course, she had to ask.
Asher smirked. "Kasi maraming milagrong nangyari dun."
"Milagro?" K asked, frowning in confusion.
"Don't mind her!" I exclaimed, interrupting Asher from answering. Mahirap na.
Sometimes, Asher doesn't know when to shut up.
Suddenly, Asher stomped her foot. "Oh, shit! Anong oras na?" She turned her eyes at
the wall clock. 10:43 AM na pala! Kim and I watched her as she bolted towards my
room. "Kailangan ko na kumilos! May kikitain pa ko!"
Huh? I didn't know she's going out today! Wala man lang pasabi? "Who're you going
out with?" I called her out.
"Sino pa ba? Edi si Yappie!" she shouted
back before slamming my bedroom door.
Kim chuckled as she sat down on the couch. "Parang ang saya niya kasama!"
I sighed. "If only you and J share the same opinion."
Her eyes widened in alarm. "Ay bakit? Anong nangyari kahapon?"
I sat down beside her and tried to explain what happened yesterday. "I don't know
why but they didn't hit it off yesterday." I cringed as I remembered how rude J was
yesterday. Good thing Kim is here now. "Buti na lang nandito ka na rin para may
dagdag friend si Asher. I don't want to force them to be friends. Baka lalong mag-
clash."
Kim nodded in agreement. "Knowing Jamie, baka magka-riot. Kasal pa naman niya
tomorrow!"
Speaking of wedding... "Yeah. Speaking of wedding, do you have something to wear

na?"
"Yup! Sabay kami bumili ni J. Ikaw ba?"
"I'll wear something from my closet na lang." I shrugged. Hindi naman kailangang
over-the-top look bukas. It's just a simple civil ceremony at the Manila City Hall.
I turned to look at Kim and I felt the guilt immediately kicked my gut. Yes, I was
away for two months but the months before that, we haven't got a decent time to
spend with each other. Wala na kaming time for our trio bondings. Samantalang dati
when the Ongpaucos aren't in the picture pa, palagi kaming magkakasama. Jamie and I
have obviously neglected Kim.
Not that she's not busy with her MBA classes. But still...
"You know what? Let's have a trio bonding!" I exclaimed excitedly.
Kim squealed. "Oo nga! Tutal aalis naman si Asher tsaka wala naman tayong lakad.
Let's have a trio bonding!
Sobrang tagal na nating hindi nagkasama na tayong tatlo lang."

See? I know she feels neglected but she's just not making any complaints. Busy si J
with her review for boards and kay River and I'm busy being difficult to my family
and Kade.
And we could have a trio bonding slash bridal shower for three. Intimate and at the
same time, tipid. Win-win situation.
"Tsaka pwedeng spontaneous bridal shower!" I said to Kim with a smug smile.
She frowned slightly. "Hindi ba siya magagalit if tayong tatlo lang, right?"
I shook my head. "Hindi yan! Tayo-tayo lang din naman witnesses bukas."
I know she won't resist us. Star Wars and Harry Potter marathon. Lasagna. Pizza.
And more lasagna. What more could she ask for?
***
"Oh my gods! Mukha kayong mga eng-eng!"
"NYAMIMANEH!!!" Kim yelled 'Chubby Bunny' but failed miserably. Jamie burst out
into laughter while filming us with her camera phone.
"CHAMIBAMI!" This time it was me who tried. Jamie cackled even louder.
"Okay! Louisse wins!" she said as Kim and I hurriedly took out the huge
marshmallows on inside our mouths. "Tuwang-tuwa siguro si Kade sa'yo. Kasyang-
kasya!" she sniggered.
I grabbed a paper napkin and wiped my mouth with it. "Jamie! Shut it, you little
shit!" I hissed at her before throwing the used paper napkin on her face.
"Joke lang!" she said as she used her hands to shield her face. "Anyway, nakapag-
usap na ba kayo ng maayos?" she asked, shifting our conversation to another topic.
Technically, no. "Long talk? Not really." We talked for a little while but we just
cuddled until he left.
Nakatulog pa nga yata ako for a while because being with him in the dark... it was
too peaceful e. Hindi naman kailangang mag-usap ng matagal. Being with each other
is enough for us.
"Hay, nako. Kung hindi ka lang talaga inunahan ni Ashley kahapon, edi sana nakapag-
usap na kayo," Jamie said in disgust.
"Diba Asher pangalan nung friend ni L?" Kim asked, oblivious from Jamie's shade.
I folded my arms in front of my chest and stared at Jamie. "Oo nga. What's the deal
with you? You're being rude to Asher." I put an emphasis on Asher's name.
Jamie rolled her eyes. "I just don't like her okay."
"Walang ginagawa sa'yo yung tao. Kakakilala niyo lang kahapon diba?" Kim stared
down at her too.
Jamie frowned at us. "Bakit, kayo ba hindi kayo nakakaramdam ng inis sa ibang
bagong kakilala niyo din? Wag mapagmalinis!"
I dropped my hands and smiled at her to soften the blow of my words. She's really
sensitive now because of her condition. "But she's my friend, J. You don't need to
be friends with her for my sake. But please stop being rude to her."
"Fine. I'll try my best." Jamie sighed. "Pero ang pampam kasi niya e!" she groaned,
like a kid who's about to throw a temper tantrum.
"I know she's too loud. But she's not obnoxious." I gave her a pointed look. She
just pouted. "She's a great girl. Just be civil, okay? Magpaka-plastic ka for once.
Saglit lang naman," I joked.
"And call her by her real name. Stop inventing names to insult her," Kim chimed
in.
"That too," I said to her, my eyes still boring hers.
She rolled her eyes. "Fine, fine.
Whatever you say, mother hen."
"C'mon! Let's eat na!" And just like that, the subject has been dropped.
After stuffing our faces with lasagna and pizza, we decided to make a vlog. It's my
first time to make a vlog with them. Na-curious din sila how to make one lalo na
when we talked about my leaked private vlogs.
We just finished our first entry, it's a First Line Challenge popularized by
Booktubers in Youtube. We almost got into a fight because Kim's mean side showed
up. It only comes up when we play games. Her competitive side is so... competitive.
Jamie, the winner, shoved her pile of books away. "Ayoko na! Tama na! Baka
magkulang ako ng witnesses bukas sa kasal ko," she said, laughing at the mess we
made in the living room. Puro book collections naming tatlo!
I nodded and threw Kim a shade. "Yeah, we better stop. Kim's a sore loser naman e."
"Sore loser ka diyan! Ikaw kaya yun no!" Kim shot back defensively.
I scoffed at her baseless accusation. "Sino kaya yung naniko ng malakas sakin? It's
not Jamie because she's on your other side and you're the one who's reading at
nakablindfold kami pareho," I countered, an eyebrow raised.
Of course, hindi siya magpapatalo. "Hindi ka-"
Jamie interrupted her by clapping her hands loudly. "Stop na! Gawa na lang tayo ng
bagong vlog!" I looked at her. Tungkol naman saan? "Tungkol sa kasal ko para kapag
napanuod ng fan girls ni Percy, mas lalo silang mabi-bitter," she answered as if
she have read the thoughts in my head.
"Message or wishes na lang!" Kim suggested.
"Bahala na! Basta gawa tayo ng vlog
about sa kasal ko."
I shrugged. Not a bad idea. "Sure. I'm gonna post it after the ceremony tomorrow."
"What? Tagal pa!" Jamie whined.

I shook my head and made her stand up. "Alis na! Dun ka na sa room mo. Anong oras
na? you have to sleep na," I said as I shooed her. She needs to take a rest
already. We've been here for like ten hours. Wala pa nga atang naliligo sa amin.
"Oo nga! Beauty rest ka na!" Kim chimed in and motioned her to leave already. Jamie
just huffed like a kid na inagawan ng candy... in her case, pwedeng lasagna.
"And think of the precious cargo!" I told her, hinting about the bun in her oven.
"Precious cargo?" Kim asked in confusion as she turned to me.
Jamie cackled. "Secret! Hindi pwede malaman ng virgin!"
I gasped in shock. She's really nuts!
"E bakit si L-oh my God!!!" Kim gasped in realization.
***
We all run towards the city hall's entrance. I'm holding Jamie's little bouquet of
flowers and Kim's helping Jamie holding the hem of her gown. Thanks gods, she
decided against wearing heels and just wore a gladiator flats.
"Bilisan na nating tumakbo! Kanina pa nag-text si Lake!"
"Chill out, Kim!"
"Parang hihimatayin na daw si River sa kaba sabi niya e!"
"Shit! Jamie, double-time!"
"Wait lang! Naiihi ako!"
We all stopped dead on our tracks. Beads of sweat were already forming on her
forehead and that is not good. She needs to look fresh and relaxed on her wedding
day! Not stressed and rattled!
Kim scowled at her. "Bakit ngayon pa? Diba umihi ka na sa bahay?" she asked.
"May pumipiga
na sa bladder ko, okay! Tsaka kinakabahan din ako!" Jamie answered, already in the
brink of tears.
Shit. We do not need a crying bride!
I grabbed her hand. "Bilisan na natin! Baka wala na tayong maabutan!" I said as I
started to run, dragging Jamie and Kim in the process.
"Hindi naman siguro nila tayo iiwan no?" I heard her ask.
"Let's not waste our time!" I shot back. We need to retouch her make-up after she
takes a piss. Kailangang magmukha siyang blushing bride, not haggard one!
"Wag na rin nating subukang alamin!" Kim chimed in.
When we got inside a clean ladies' comfort room, Jamie immediately took the nearest
empty cubicle. Kim followed her and waited at the cubicle's door, clutching a small
package of wet wipes.
"Paabot wipes!" I heard J said.
I put the bouquet on the sink and took out the make-up kit from my small sling bag.
"J, double time na! I'm gonna touch up your face pa!"
"Okay! Wait lang! Natatae ata ako!"
"Good gods!" I sputtered.
Jamie cackled. "Joke lang! Nagpapanty na ko!" she yelled before we heard unlocked
and opened the door. She was grinning at us when she went out.
"Wash your hands ha!" I told her.
She rolled her eyes as she went to the sink. "Oo naman no!"
We waited for her to finish before Kim and I helped each other on retouching her
made-up face. We sprayed her with her perfume, na thankfully nailagay sa bag ko.
Mabuti naman nakisama din yung madulas niyang hair and it didn't come undone when
we were running. Bagay na bagay sa kanya at sa white Grecian dress niya ang
waterfalls braid na ginawa ko sa kanya.
"This
is so familiar," Jamie muttered as Kim reapplied the nude lipstick on her lips.
"Awww! More than a year ago na pala yun no?" Kim said.
"Yeah," I managed to say. I'm starting to get choked up remembering that night. The
three of us didn't expect that the decision of going out that night will bring the
three of us here.
Us meeting the Ongpaucos.
Jamie getting married to River and gods, they're expecting their first kid too!
"Yung inayusan natin siya sa CR ng isang gas station on the way to Taguig," Kim
said after heaving a dreamy sigh.
Jamie cleared her throat as her eyes started to well up. "Hindi ko akalain na sa
gabing yun, makikilala ko yung future-husband ko," she whispered.
K took her hands. "And now we're here, inaayusan ka ulit para sa kasal niyo," she
said.
"I owe you two a lot." Jamie turned to me. "Lalo ka na, L! Kung wala kang 'sources'
sa The Ledge, hindi ko makikilala si River." She paused to sniff. "Just thank you,
Mother Hen."
Jamie's tearful words was my undoing. I blinked twice to fight off the tears before
punching her on her shoulder playfully. "Ano ka ba! Stop it! You're gonna make me
cry! I don't wanna mess up my make-up, okay?"
Jamie just laughed at me before turning to Kim.
"At ikaw, K. Thank you din. Kahit hindi tayo madalas magkita nitong nakaraan, you
never fail to make me smile and you always make me see the brighter side of
things!"
Kim is now crying.
"My gods!" I wiped my eyes carefully before grabbing the two for a group hug.
Kim giggled as she wiped her wet cheeks. "Tama na! Ikakasal
ka pa!"
***
Lake whistled as soon as he saw the three of us enter the courtroom. "Daaaaamn," he
said, prompting River to turn around. He smiled the moment he laid his eyes on his
bride. Jamie bolted towards River and he met her half-way.
I looked away from their reunion. River and Jamie opted to not see each other
before their wedding day. He stayed on his condo while Jamie stayed with Kim and
me.
"Hey, Louisse," Lake greeted when he reached us.
I just waved at him and he turned his eyes on Kim. "Hey there, buddy," he greeted
Kim with a cheeky smile.
"Did I miss anything?" I jumped in surprise when I felt Kade's breath against my
ears. Kahit hindi ko na tignan, I know his voice too well.
I didn't look back at him. "We just got here."
I gasped when I felt his warm hand on my lower back. "You look beautiful," he
whispered.
My breath hitched on my throat when his hand snaked on my waist. "Thank you," I
said. He just squeezed my waist. It made my stomach clenched hard.
"Nandito na ba ang lahat?"
My eyes snapped back in front when I heard a deep voice. Shiz. Hindi ko man lang
napansin na the judge is already here! At naibigay na ni Jamie yung Darth Vader
mask kay River. Buti hindi niya sinuot.
"Oh my! She's wearing a golden wreath!" I whispered to Kade.
"River bought it for her," he said to me as he guided me to where our friends were
standing.
"Are you ready to spend the rest of your life with me?" River whispered to Jamie.
Medyo malakas kaya rinig pa rin namin.
Jamie's response made me chuckle. "I was born ready,"
she said, quoting Anna from Frozen.
***
Kim and I were crying as Jamie quietly soaked in River's message to her. The
ceremony was very informal. They're done with the exchange of vows and rings. We
all helped and participated with the symbolic gifts. The four of us, Kim, Lake,
Kade and I served as sponsors and the bride's and groom's entourage.
Lake was the best man and I am the maid-of-honor. It was an organized mess and I
know Jamie wouldn't have it any other way.
Masaya din mag-sermon ang judge. Not the exactly katulad sa mga pari but this words
were genuine and full of lessons. Ang dami niyang sinabi about marriage, maganda at
mahirap na truth about it.
I liked it when he said that marriage is not easy. The married couples have to work
for it para mag-last. They have to be best friends and lovers at the same time.
Sila lang naman ang magiging magkakakampi sa buhay.
Gusto ko rin yung sinabi niya na ang marriage ay hindi katulad ng pagkain, na kapag
sinubo mo ng mainit ay pwede mong iluwa kapag napaso ang iyong dila. It is the
highest degree of commitment, both in law and in the eyes of God.
I like it that he didn't sugarcoat his words. He pointed out that they were too
young and that he doesn't usually officiate civil weddings to young couples, lalo
na sa mga katulad nina River at Jamie na 'secret wedding'. But he acknowledged that
the two were really in love with each other and there's nothing that could stop
them lalo na that they're jumping in this together.
It was obvious that they just fit and they make sense. They're balanced. They
complement each
other.
River cleared his throat. "Baby, I will never, ever get tired of thanking Him for
giving you to me." He took her left hand and kissed her rings. "Thank you for
taking me back even if you saw me at my worst. It wasn't pleasant. I know I caused
you a lot of pain before, but I promise you, starting today... I will never put you
in a position where you will doubt me again."
River wiped the tears that streamed down on Jamie's cheeks. "I can live my life
without you. But you know I won't because a life without you in it would be empty
and worthless... and pretty fucking boring." Jamie threw her head back and laughed
out loud. "I will love you until the end of time. You're my only girl, my only
Annabeth," he said with an indulgent smile as he stared at his bride.
"Jamie... Your message to River?" the judge reminded Jamie. Nakalimutan niya ata
ang gagawin niya because she's just staring at her groom.
"I'd shave my legs for you," she started. It made us all laugh. Kahit kalian
talaga!
Jamie giggled with us before she continued her message. "I'd share my lasagna with
you, kahit mahirap." River grinned at her and his dimples mesmerized Jamie for a
bit. "I will always tell you 'I love you' kahit marindi ka na. Because I know,
there will never be a day na hindi ako sasabog sa sobrang pagmamahal ko sa'yo. My
'I love yous' will never be worthless. There's no geeky line that I can quote-spout
to you that na makakapantay sa nararamdaman ko every time na kasama kita." Jamie
started to choke up as she continued to cry. River patiently wiped her tears away.
Jamie smiled
and took a huge breath before she continued. "Percy, hindi ko na alam kung ano pang
sasabihin ko. But know that I love you more than Thor and Anakin Skywalker combined
and that is saying something."
The judge finally spoke when Jamie was done with her message.
"By the power vested in me by the City of Manila, I now pronounce you husband and
wife." The judge looked at River and smiled. "You may now kiss the bride."
"I present to you, Mr and Mrs River Ongpauco!"
***
We had a simple celebration after the wedding. We went back to the apartment and we
ordered for boxes of pizzas, buckets of fried chicken and fries. Of course, hindi
mawawala ang favorite na lasagna ni Jamie.
After that, we all called an early night. Lahat kami pagod and syempre, the
newlyweds needed to have an alone time after they got separated yesterday. They
needed the rest too because they will face both sets of their parents the next
morning. They will tell them that they already got married.
It's kind of like a suicide, if you ask me.
And I was right. When they got back kanina, they looked like they survived a firing
squad. Sa sobrang stress ni Jamie hindi na niya kami pinansin at dumiretso sa room
niya para magpalit. Little did she know, River just spilled the beans about the
baby.
Well, Lake dropped by too earlier. Let's just say it was his fault kaya nadulas si
River about the baby-thing. Lake was teasing a stressed-out River. Kaya ayun, the
dude just exploded. He blurted out that Jamie has an ultrasound appointment. I
acted shock because the two were shocked. Ayoko na palalain yung problema.
Mahirap na kung magtatampo sila dahil nauna kong nalaman.
Asher came back home kanina right after Jamie and River left for their check-up.
She was hangover but it didn't stop her from avoiding my bed. Hindi pa rin siya
natulog sa bed ko because of the same reason. She said she hates miracles,
especially the kind that happens in my bed.
Lake's in the living room too with Asher and Kim. I think they're still reeling
about the news. It's kind of a big deal because it's the first baby in our circle
of friends.
"WHERE IS SHE?!" I jumped when I heard a loud male voice accompanied by a loud
banging noise.
"She's in her room!" Lake shouted.
I frowned. What the hell is going on?
I was about to jumped out of bed when my bedroom door burst open and Kade strode
inside. He immediately went towards me. "Babe, are you okay?"
Huh?
"Yeah," I answered. I'm a bit confused here.
"Are you sure?" he asked with a concerned facial expression. I frowned at him. Ano
bang meron?
"Yes, I'm okay. What's going on ba?" I asked. My bedroom door slammed shut and we
both looked back on it.
Kade sat down beside me and sighed. "They told me you're having a panic attack."
"What?!" My eyes widened in shock. "I'm just cleaning up my closet here!" That's
not a funny joke!
Kade growled as he stood up and walked towards my bedroom door. "Hey! You're little
ruse is already busted!" he shouted before grabbing the doorknob. "Fuck! I can't
open the door!" he exclaimed as he tried to pull the doorknob. I can see that its
rotating but it's still plastered in the
doorway.
"It's locked from the outside!" Lake shouted from the other side.
"How the hell did you do that?" I yelled back as I jumped out of bed and went to
Kade's side.
"We installed a new lock on your door," he answered, his tone smug.
"Naka-padlock kayo, guys!" Kim yelled.
I shook my head in disbelief! Why the hell would they do that? "What the hell is
wrong with you, guys?!"
Lake's laughter boomed from the other side and it made me irritated a little more.
"Don't worry! I left a box under your bed, L!" I went back to my bed and dropped on
my knees. I looked under the bed and saw a box. "There's sandwiches and two bottles
of water in it. Syempre, I didn't forget the condoms!"
I sighed as I opened the box. There's sandwiches nga and two bottled waters. There
are condoms inside too.
"Lake, this isn't funny! Open the fucking door!" Kade roared before he banged his
palm on my bedroom door.
"Hey, don't say bad words! There are little ears here!" Lake continued to tease his
brother.
"Hindi na ko bata, Lake!" I heard Kim shouted at him. "L, Kade! Papalabasin lang
namin kayo kapag okay na kayong dalawa."
"Whose idea is this?" I asked.
"Sino pa ba? Edi ang number one shipper niyo!" Asher said. "IZ MOI!!!"
Of course. Sanib-pwersa. I can't believe Asher. She knows Kade and I are okay.
Pinagti-tripan niya lang kami at nagpauto naman tong si Lake at Kim sa kanya!
"Screw you, Asher! Traitor!" I yelled at her.
Asher laughed. "Whatever! Gumawa na lang kayo ng milgaro diyan!"
I heard Kim's faint gasp. "OMG! Bastos yung tinutukoy
mong milagro!"
"Wow! You got it! Hindi ka na masyadong slow!"

I smacked my forehead and continued to sit on the floor. "So what do we do now?" I
asked him as I looked over my shoulder. I caught him staring at me.
"Do you trust me, Salazar?" Kade asked.
I smiled. "Yes, I do trust you." Halos sa lahat ng bagay, yes.
Kade showed me his infamous, panty-dropping half-smile, half-smirk. "Good. Pack

your bags. We're gonna sneak out through the window."
I tore my gaze at him and looked out the fire exit window. "They didn't lock it?"
"Nah. They're amateurs."
I laughed at his unimpressed tone. "I'll pack my bags," I said, standing up. "You
take this box. We need those things."
Kade's smirk widened. "Especially the condoms, right?" he asked in a low voice. I
just stared at him blankly. "Just kidding," he said, chuckling.
It made me chuckle too. "Bring it. Just in case," I said in a teasing voice. He
groaned at me in return.
I did what I was told to do. I gathered my suitcases and put my clean clothes in a
duffel bag. Buti na lang hindi pa ako tapos mag-unpack ng gamit ko from my maletas.
After packing and changing into new clothes, I faced Kade with a smile.
He smiled in return. "Will you run away with me, Salazar?" he asked. I watched his
hand, reached out to me, palm up.
I just stared at it for a while. Should I take it?
Kim once told us that love is not a trial-and-error. Pwedeng tama siya, pwedeng
hindi. That's her opinion. I don't have a say in it.
But for me? Love is a calculated risk.
You have to know it needs trust, understanding, loyalty and love.
You have to know if what you feel for that person is not just a fleeting feeling.
You have to know you will get hurt at some point.
You have to have the perfect timing when you take the risk.
You have to know if you have the capacity to love someone and if he has the
capacity to reciprocate it.
You have to lay down all of your cards when you're sure of winning... or losing.
You have to know these risks before you take a plunge.
Good thing, I'm done calculating the risks.
I love it that the odds are in my favor now. I guess, I'm gonna grab it and take my
chances.
I looked up and my eyes caught his. He's smiling at me, his eyes patient. He's
always been patient with me. I am really difficult to be with and he's still here.
He waited for me until I decided to break down my walls and trust him fully.
Ano pa bang hahanapin ko? Just looking at him makes my heart pound and my brain
short-circuit.
I smiled back at him as I took his hand. "Where to first?"
***
Author's Note:
This is When It Was Me's final chapter.
- C
=================
Postface: First Name
Postface: First Name
Cascade's POV
Inhale.
Exhale.
Inhale.
Exhale.
Breathe, Cascade. Fucking breathe.
I turned my head and admired the perfection lying next to me.
Fuck, I know I sounded like a sap. She will probably laugh at me if she heard that
one. She's not really perfect, nobody is. She has imperfections and she thinks in
an unconventional way. But as clichéd as it may sound, her shortcomings... the
things that makes her human made me fall for her.
The first time I saw her, it was in the university. She was really stand-offish and
that made her stand out. Now though, I'm beginning to realize that she probably
felt awkward all the time she does that thing with her face. She will give you that
blank stare with no trace of emotion on her face.
It will make you uncomfortable and frustrated at times. Not because it looks awful
on her. But knowing there's something going on in her head that she won't tell you,
man... that's frustrating. At least for me, though. I'm always at the receiving end
of her pokerface when I first started talking to her more than a year ago.
In return, I would push her buttons until she gets furious at me. I never mind when
she's mad at me for being an ass because it turns me on every damn time. She's hot
like that.
So naturally, I pissed her off a lot.
My face split into a shit-eating grin when I remembered that first up-close and
personal encounter I had with her. It was at The Ledge. She doesn't know that the
story I told her was the carefully altered
and filtered version.
Staring at her sleeping face right now, I can't help but remember the night I
watched her sleep inside her car while I was inside mine, reviewing and reading my
International Law book. If I had known that she was the one that I was gonna debate
with, I would have stopped reviewing that time.
Sucks for her, I aced that debate and she flunked it.
***
From: Lake Ongpauco
Dude, nandito crush mo.

I groaned. I really hate this guy sometimes. Why did I even bother to ask him that
hot chick's name? Now he knows I'm attracted to her.
Fuck you.
From: Lake Ongpauco
She's dancing on a table top. Wanna rescue her?
"Shit." If Lake's texting about Louisse Salazar dancing on table tops, that means
he's fucking serious.
I jumped out of the couch and left Lake's office. Some of the bouncers and other
employees at the back offices greeted me and I just gave them a nod as I walked
towards The Ledge's VIP area.
She was the first thing that caught my attention. She was indeed dancing...
horribly, if I may add. But her carefree demeanor made my dick twitched.
Yeah, I know. I'm a sick bastard like that.
But this is the first time I saw her like this, unguarded and vulnerable. She's
drenched in her own sweat. She looked nothing like the girl I see in the
university. She's always looked fresh and fully made-up
but now, it doesn't look like she cared how she looked as she got lost in the beat
of the loud music.
I looked around the people around her and saw some of them were ogling her while
some others were filming her. This annoyed the shit out of me.
"Mel, Jay, Rudy! Take care of those assholes. Make sure they delete those videos,"
I shouted my order, not bothering to look away from her.
The bouncers immediately moved and confiscated the phones that were raised up. It
isn't the first time they took care of scandalous videos in here.
I don't care if this is a free country. This is our club and we rule this place. If
I wanted them to delete videos from their phones, they're gonna do it. If they
don't, they will get blacklisted. Easy as that.
"Ward off the fuckers. I'll take her home," I ordered to the two bouncers left
beside me.
My gaze went back to the girl dancing on the table top. She's dancing like nobody's
watching her. I shook my head in amusement. Robot dance moves? Knowing there's a
dork side to her made the side of my lip twitched.
You might not know it yet, but you will be mine.
I walked up to the enigma that is Louisse Salazar.
"You need to move your ass down, miss!" I shouted as soon as I reached her. Despite
the loud thumping music, I know she heard me. She raked her long brown hair as she
looked down on me.
Fuck. She's a hot mess.
"What if I don't?" she shot back, her words slurred.
"Then I'm gonna throw you out of my club." That wasn't true,
though. Lake solely owned this club. We just like to brag that it's ours too just
to fuck with their heads. Lake doesn't mind.
She threw her head back and laughed.
Good God, she's fucking gorgeous.
"C'mon, you buzz-kill. Escort me to my chariot." She reached for my hand like she's
a queen from a period movie.
See? Dork.
I took her hand and I touched the small of her back to guide her descent on the
floor. I don't know how she did it, but she managed to slip despite my strong arms
around her.
"Ooopsie!" she giggled, her head lolling to the side. "I'm sorry, Mr. Club-Owner."
I shook my head. I didn't expect our first official meeting would be like this.
"No worries." I moved away from her slightly but left my hand on the small of her
back. "Where are your things?" I asked as I guided her towards the back offices.
"I don't have any."
I stopped and frowned at her. "Then how did you get in here?" No phone and wallet?
And she's drunk? Where did she get all of her drinks? Did someone buy her drinks to
make her this hammered?
My frowned deepened at the thought. Why am I so concerned about her well-being? It

doesn't look like she's bothered with her safety when she got herself drunk.
"Oh! That!" she nodded at the realization and I just stared at her. She stood on
her toes and whisper-yelled at my left ear. "My phone is in my car. My money and
keys are in my bra."
Goddammit. I didn't need to know that. But I asked, right?
held back a groan and started walking again. "C'mon, you need to drink some water.
You're gonna have a hell of a hangover tomorrow."
And speaking of tomorrow, I remember we are gonna have a debate about the disputed
islands in the West Philippine Sea and shit.
She's in that same class tomorrow. I wonder how she will fare at the hands of our
terror professor. International Law, Debate and Hangover? That is not a good
combination, I tell you.
Shit. If I wanted to pass that subject, I need to review right now. I'm just gonna
make her drink lots of water then maybe bring her home. After that, I'll read my
goddamned books and have an all-nighter.
We were about to reach the 'restricted area' that leads to the back offices when I
felt her body slumped against me. Without looking at her, I know she has already
passed out on me.
"Lightweight," I muttered as I struggled to carry her in my arms. She's not that

heavy but she has long and uncoordinated limbs.
***
After making her drink water, she fell back to sleep. I had to carry her again
until I reached my car. I was about to open the shotgun seat when she raised her
head and pointed at the black Mini Cooper parked beside my truck.
"That's my car!"
"Really?"
"Yup! Look! I'm gonna get the keys lang, you just wait!" I looked away when I saw a
flash of her black lace bra. She then dangled a wet keyfob in front of my face.
"Sorry! It got wet because of my sweaty boobs."
"Jesus Christ," I muttered under my breath. Am I getting punished
right now?
I grabbed it from her hand and punched its button. The black Mini Cooper beside us
made an audible sound. She jumped out my arms and opened her car. She climbed
inside the driver's seat and leaned her head back on the headrest.
She didn't close her door. Instead, she shoved her hand out palm up. "Hey, Cascade
Ongpauco! Gimme back my keys."
I smirked at her. "Ah, so you know me."
She rolled her eyes sloppily. She's clearly still drunk. "Duh. We're classmates,
right?"
I nodded. "Yes."
Of course. What did I expect?
She extended her hand again. "Akin na keys ko, please."
I shook my head. "Nah. You're too drunk to drive." There's no way in hell I'm gonna
let her drive when she's pissed drunk.
She made a face. "I know. I won't drive agad. I'm gonna sleep muna." And as if I
need more convincing, she made a show of reclining her seat way, way back and
putting her feet on the dashboard.
I looked away from the long expanse of skin in front of me. "Then your keys will
stay with me for a while."
"No. Give it back to me. I don't trust you."
That made me chuckle. "That's the first sensible thing I heard from you tonight."
I'm a little impressed. Just a little. I handed her the keys. "Here you go."
She grabbed it immediately. "Thanks."
"Don't mention it," I said with a shrug.
She snorted. "I probably won't. I'm probably too drunk to remember you tomorrow.'
Ouch. "Probably."
"Okay. I'm gonna sleep na."I
watched her grab the car door. But before she closed it, she smiled and waved at me
first. "Thanks again, Mr. Club Owner slash QB!"
That was interesting.
I didn't leave her, though. I stayed in my car and watched out for her. And as
planned, I opened my books and reviewed. Thank God, my books are here in my car.
I sneaked glances her way as I studied all night long.
I don't care if I look like a stalker. It's on me if something happens to her while
she's sleeping soundly in her car and honestly, my conscience can't take it. Must
be the ahia in me. I have four sisters and two of those are still kids. I just
can't shrug the over protectiveness off my shoulders.
I yawned as I closed my book. Dropping it on my lap, I looked at the clock on my

dashboard with droopy eyes.
4:53 AM
I need a fucking strong black coffee.
So I decided to buy one and a Caramel Macchiato for Louisse. I don't know how she
takes her coffee but she looks like a Caramel Macchiato kind of girl.
But I shouldn't have bothered. Her black Mini Cooper was gone when I got back to
The Ledge's parking area.
***
I groaned when I heard another alert tone from my phone. I gingerly reached for it.
It was placed on the bedside table together with Salazar's phone, an opened box of
condoms, our wallets and her wristwatch.
Fuck, I'm still wearing my wristwatch.
I shook my head as I grabbed my phone. I groaned when I saw who sent me those text
messages.
/>
From: Sabrina Sarte
Hey.
Hey, are you free tonight?
Can we talk?
I know I owe her my sanity and Salazar's life somehow. But she knows I'm gonna
pursue Salazar again. She knows I only have eyes for my girl. So why bother texting
me? I'm not interested in her, I never have.
I'm grateful for her for alerting us about the Shalvis thing. But my connections
with her stops there. Yes, her text and call saved Salazar and Andrew but that
doesn't mean I'm gonna fall for her because of her heroic act.
I'm with Louisse Salazar and she's the only one that I want.
So I did what any committed guy would do.
I blocked her number.
***
I fucking hate my adoptive father sometimes.

Instead of being with Salazar today and partying with my batch mates, I'm stuck
here in his office. Reading his cases and helping him one-up the prosecutors on his
latest case. Why did God decided to give me an asshole architect of a biological
father and a ruthless criminal defense lawyer as an adoptive father?
My life really sucks some times.
I excused myself for a bathroom break. It was just an excuse. I'm going to check on
Salazar right now. I grabbed my phone and noticed several texts from Sabrina.
Dread pooled in my gut as I started to read her texts.
From: Sabrina Sarte
Kade, I saw your girlfriend with your rival.
I'm watching them right now. Don't worry, I'll
snap a photo if they make-out.
Oh my God!!!!!!!!
Her last text was just two minutes ago. What the hell was that?
Even before I could ask myself more questions, Sabrina's name popped in my screen
again. This time she's calling, though.
I answered immediately. "What?"
"Oh my God," she wheezed. "I know I'm not a good person. But I know I need to call
for help even if enemy ko yung in danger!"
Why is she whispering? And what the hell is she going on about?
I shook my head. I'm too damn tired for her dramas. "Just get to the point,
Sabrina. I don't have time to this."
"It's Louisse and Andrew."
I froze when I heard the slight quiver in her voice. She sounded terrified. Sabrina
Sarte doesn't do terrified. Something is definitely wrong.
"What?" I managed to ask.
"I saw him collapsed first before Louisse went down too. They were carried upstairs
by Shalvis' friends!" My stomach dropped the moment her words started to sink in.
I tried to calm myself. I need to think. I need to think straight. "Fuck. I'm gonna
go there right now."
"Kade! Madami sila! You have to call the police!" Sabrina hissed.
"You haven't called them yet?!" I growled as my barely contained anger showing.
"I might be a bitch but I'm not stupid. I don't wanna get involved with this! This
is the only way I can help!"
"Fuck! I'm gonna call my bro-cousins." I stepped out of the bathroom and started to
run. I heard someone called my
name but I didn't bother to look back. I have no time for explanations. I just need
to leave before I lose my fucking mind.
"Do you know this place? I could text you the address."
"I know where it is," I snapped at her. I know I should be thankful for her help
but right now, all I could think about is my girl, helpless in the hands of self-
entitled assholes. "Call me again if something comes up."
I was about to drop the call when I heard Sabrina gasped in horror.
"Kade! You need to hurry up! I heard some people got roofied here! Natatakot na
ako. I need to leave! Gagawa raw ng video sila Shalvis. I'm not really sure pero I
don't feel good about this."
No shit, Sherlock.
"Leave that damned place, Sabrina. Now," I ordered her as I rounded my truck. I
opened it and slid inside.
"It's getting worse, Kade. Move faster!" Sabrina's terrified voice undid something
in me.
I dropped the call and started driving. I dialed Lake's number and did a fast run
down. He said he's going to call River and the others and he will bring his
baseball bats. I asked him to bring a fucking gun if he has one.
That was the last conversation I had before I met everyone at an overcrowded
street. We parked our cars haphazardly. Lake threw me a baseball bat and I caught
it swiftly.
"What's the plan?" River asked his jaw ticking as he stared at the house in front
of us.
I shook my head. "We don't need a plan. What we need is to fucking go there and get
Louisse and Andrew."
"Kade,
we can't just barge in there just like that!" Lake reasoned out. He pointed at the
people milling around the patio.
"Are we outnumbered?"
My head snapped to Storm. Lake managed to get him too? I looked around us and saw
some of my old teammates, Jake, Gio, Ryan and Grant. Their faces were grim with
anger and fear.
"I have no fucking clue. But Sabrina said 'madami sila.'"
I felt my phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled it out and read Sabrina's text.
From: Sabrina Sarte
Where are you?! I heard they're filming a sextape upstairs!
"FUCK!" I growled before sprinted towards the house.
I heard them all run after me as Lake and River made up a plan in haste. I pushed
anyone who blocked my way, I didn't care if it's a guy or a woman or whoever the
fuck they are. There's only one thing in my mind as I crashed their house party.
I needed to get to Salazar.
With barely contained rage, my footsteps were heavy and my free hand was balled up
in fist as I climbed up the stairs. When I reached the second floor, I went
straight to the farthest room in the hallway with Lake and the rest of the guys hot
on my heels.
The first I saw was the blinding lights and the men standing around the bed. One
guy was holding a phone-
Sabrina's text message flashed in my head.
Where are you?! I heard they're filming a sextape upstairs!
"Shit!" someone shouted.
And then it was just chaos.
Fists were flying, baseball
bats and steel pipes were swinging around me. But I didn't care if I get hurt. I
looked around the room and searched for her.
I froze when I saw her.
Something in me snapped when I saw Andrew's limp naked body next to her. And when
the lace underwear dangling on her left foot caught my eyes, I saw nothing but red.
I roared as I rushed forward, the baseball bat raised above my head.

***
I swallowed the rage and fear that bubbled up inside me. I took deep breaths before
wrapping my arms around Salazar and pulling her flushed body against mine. Burying
my nose in her hair, I inhaled her scent and it did the trick.
I calmed down.
She's in my arms and she's safe with me.
I pressed my lips against her temple. "I won't let anybody hurt you again,
Salazar."
Not anyone, not even me.
I know we will have fights in the future. But I won't do anything to deliberately
hurt or inflict pain on her. She's been through a lot and a person can only take so
much.
I know she will still be a pain in the ass, but she's my pain in the ass. I'll
probably push her buttons too but I won't give up on her again.
God, I hate remembering the time I hurt her. That time when I spouted shit to her
because I was too hurt when she gave up on us. I shouldn't have said those words to
her. I shouldn't have given up, too. I shouldn't have left her.
I should've erased her fears and doubts that night. I should have been a better guy
for her.
***
/>
"You know what? You're more trouble than you're worth."
The moment those words slipped from my mouth, I knew I fucked shit up. It was the
final nail in the coffin.
It was confirmed when I saw a single tear rolled down her left cheek followed by
her voice breaking when she said, "I know."
I raked both of my hands on my hair and pulled it. "Fuck, I'm sorry I didn't mean
that," I said lamely.
I really don't. It wasn't me talking; it was my ego who said those things to her to
hurt her back.
"You do," she said in a small voice as she silently cried.
Fuck. No, no... She's shutting me out once again. I can literally see her building
up a fucking fortress around herself.
I took a step forward. "Salazar..."
She took a step back and wiped her wet cheeks. "I need you to leave, Ongpauco."
I'm losing her.
I shook my head. "No..."
I watched her hand massaged her left chest absentmindedly. Fuck. I did that to her.
Those words didn't just hurt her emotionally, it inflicted physical pain on her
too.
"Please leave. You've said enough."
I did. I left because I know she can't bear to see me right now. But I'll come back
tomorrow. I will apologize. I will grovel if I have to. I will even let her punch
me... anything so we could even things out.
I will do whatever it takes to make her forgive me and take me back.
But what if she won't take me back tomorrow? What if tonight really was the last
straw for her?
Fuck. I need to go back. I need to sneak back inside her bedroom.
I was about to climb the fire exit ladder when my phone started to vibrate and I
heard the ringtone I set for my father. It's almost midnight. Why would he call me
now?
He wouldn't normally call me at this hour-shit-unless it's an emergency.
"Dad?" I answered immediately.
"Where are you?"
"I'm at my girl's apartme-"
"I don't care where you are! Get back here! Your mother overdosed again!" Dad
shouted before dropping the call.
I looked back at my phone and then back to Salazar's open window.
Shit. I didn't check on her. I should have gone straight home to check on her
before I came here. That was the original plan. But as soon as the plane landed, I
just wanted to clear things up with Salazar.
And look how I messed that up.
"I'll be back tomorrow," I whispered as I put back the fire exit ladder back to its
place.
***
I was just about to leave my condo when my brothers showed up. I let them in and
followed them inside after closing the door.
" Kade," River called out my name.
I looked up and saw River coming at me. "What?" I asked not seeing his real intent.
The asshole punched me on my fucking jaw. Hard.
"The fuck, man?" I asked as I grasped my aching jaw. He caught me off guard.
"Shit! That hurt!" he exclaimed as he flicked his injured hand.
was tempted to hit him back but thought against it. He's still recovering from his
injuries months ago.
Lake doubled over as he laughed. "Stupid! Di ka pa fully-recovered and you're

punching someone na?" He nudged River's side and sniggered. "You should've kicked
him in the balls instead."
"Fuck you, Lake," I spat at him before going back to River. "What the fuck was that
for, River?"
"Partly to get even." He shrugged as he massaged his hand. "But mostly because
Jamie asked me to."
I shook my head in disbelief. "You guys are crazy."
He smirked at me in return. "You punched me too when I was acting up. I'm just
returning the favor."
"Now what? Natauhan ka na ba, Kade? You need a punch from me pa?" Lake chimed in.
"Gago. It's not that simple," I shot back, still irritated at them.
"It is," River said.

I scoffed. "Said by the guy who's courting his ex again."
"At least I'm doing something to win her back," River shot back.
Good for him. Our situations were different. He was the one who broke up with his
ex-girlfriend and he's now trying to win her back. I'm the one who got dumped not
the other way around.
And there's dad pa.
"She gave up on me first."
Lake smacked me on the back of my head. "Stupid! You don't give up with the people
you love even if they say otherwise!"
"Gago, I'm still your ahia." I smacked the back of his head harder.
We all got quiet for a while before Lake opened his mouth again.
"You
fucked up, man."
"Don't you understand, Lake?" I asked in exasperation. "She made me leave. She
dumped me."
"Still, you're fucked," he scoffed.
"She. Asked. Me. To. Leave. Her," I said through clenched teeth.
Lake met my stare head on. "If something matters to you, you do not let it go,
ever."
"And I should listen to your advice because?"
He massaged his nape then shrugged. "Because I'm your brother and I know you're
only dating Sabrina because of dad."
"Admit it, Kade. We all know this is his doing.," River added.
I can't tell them anything. I don't want them to get in the middle with this shit
storm with dad. I already jeopardized my mom's medical finances and my little
sisters' trust funds, I don't want them to suffer too.
I'm going to solve this on my own.
"Stay out of this."
***
And thank God, they did.
Those two would've fucked things up even more. Good thing Yap came into the picture
when I decided that I'm done with his sick game.
I looked down on Salazar's face again and smiled.
Lake would always tease me that I lucked out. He said I managed to wear down
Salazar and I should thank my lucky stars that I'm dating my dream girl.
He's wrong.
She's not my 'dream girl.'
Louisse Salazar surpassed it.
She's more than just her physical appearance.
She's fiercely loyal and she loves me just as much as I love her. She's funny and a
smart-mouth, too. Sometimes she acts
like she doesn't have any fucks to give, but my girl cares a lot, especially when
it comes to her family and friends.
She's tough but a softie inside. She's no doormat and I love arguing with her. I
love fucking our banters.
She's gorgeous and damn, she turns me on all the time.
She's a bit fucked up in the head, but that's fine because I am too.
She knows everything about me, the good, the bad and the awful. But she's still
here with me. And I know her issues too. I know everything about her-except her
full name.
Asher said it was her secret.
It bothered me that I didn't know that. I'll ask her later and if she won't tell me
the answer, I'm gonna do everything to get it from her.
"Hey."
I looked down again and saw her sleepy eyes staring back at me.
"Hey, babe."
She smiled at me as I tipped my head down. I brushed my lips against her and we
kissed slowly, just savoring and enjoying the moment.
"I remembered something," I said after pulling away from her. It bothered me
earlier. I need to know the answer straight from her.
"Yeah?" she asked as she rubbed her eyes with the balls of her palms.
"Asher said 'Louisse Salazar' isn't your full name." She her stopped moving. "Why
didn't I know that?" I asked, smirking.
She blinked her eyes innocently before shrugging. "I don't know about you." She
then punched my shoulder lightly. "Why didn't you know that?"
"Because you never told me," I shot back at her. I know I asked her before and she
clearly lied that time.
She rolled her eyes as she touched my
face. "Hey, why are your eyes red?"
Yeah, right.
"Don't change the subject."
She scowled at me. "I'm not! I'm just worried. Your eyes are bloodshot!" She
pinched both of my cheeks and it made me wince. That hurt! "Did you even sleep?"
I shook my head. "I didn't."
"Why?"
"I just wanna stare at you," I said simply.
She scrunched her nose. "That's... creepy."
Her reaction made me laugh. Sometimes I wonder if my girl has a romantic bone in
her body.
"Yeah? How's this, my girlfriend won't tell me her second name."
She rolled her eyes. "First name, stupid. 'Louisse' is my second name."
"What's your first name then, Salazar?" I asked without missing a beat.
"Why would I tell you?" she scoffed.
"Because I need to know my girlfriend's full name."
"Well, that's for me to know and for you to find out."
Damn it. This girl...
"Oh, so you want play that game, huh?"
"What game?"
She squealed when I pulled and threw the sheets on the floor. I moved on top of her
and trapped her underneath me. She punched me on my shoulder once again.
"It's cold!"
I leaned down until our noses touched. "Want me to make you feel hot?" I whispered
to her.
She spread her legs and I willingly settled between her legs. "Oh, please. I'm
already hot."
"Conceited much?" I asked as I grounded myself to her.
She shivered visibly. "Horny much?" she rasped as her hand skimmed to my abdomen
until she grasped my length.
"What if I am?" I asked through clenched teetch as I pressed myself to her. "Nice
try, Salazar.
What's your first name?"
Shit, she's making me lose my mind.
"Nope. Not telling." And then she squeezed me.
"You leave me with no choice, then," I said before lowering my head down to her
chest.
"Oh my God!" she gasped. I took it as a chance to pin her hands above her head with
one hand.
I released her from my mouth with a loud pop. "It's Cascade, baby. I'm no God."
"Fuck you!" she hissed.
"Oh, I will." I smirked at her. I slid my free hand between her legs and played
with her. "But I will only make you come if you tell me your name."
"You're so bad!" she groaned as she closed her eyes.
"What's your name?" I whispered in her left ear.
"Louisse Salazar," she answered.
I chuckled at her tenacity. "Your first name, you smartass."
"Not... telling."
"Tell me," I asked as I slid a finger inside her.
"Holy shit, babe!" she gasped in surprise.
I bit her earlobe after licking its outer shell. "There's more of that if you tell
me your first name."
Her hips twitched when I slid another finger. "Kade... Please."
I didn't budge. "No. Tell me your name."
"Fine!" "It's..."
"It's...?"
"No!"
"No coming for you, then," I said before pulling my fingers off her.
"Oh my God! Don't stop now!" she whined.
"Tell me your first name," I said as I pushed myself up and looked down at her
face.
It looked like she was about to cry from frustration. "It's..."
To give her encouragement, I aligned myself to her and pushed inside her without
preamble.
She screamed her first name in surprise. See? I'm that good... in interrogation.
***
"You're such an asshole, Cascade Ongpauco," Salazar rasped after she collapsed on
top of me.
That made me chuckle despite being breathless. She worked me up too. "Tell me
something I didn't know, babe."
She sighed as she settled her head on the left part of my chest. "What now? What do
we do now?"
"Bitin ka pa?" I asked in amazement.
She pinched me on my side. Ouch.
"Gago. Not that. I can't even move."
I sighed. Hmm... What do we do know? I can't think of anything else but sleep and
snuggle or spoon. "Well, I guess we should just enjoy this. We waited for this for
a long, long time," I answered as my hand played with her hair.
I missed her long hair. But this haircut suits her well naman.
"And then?"
I shrugged. "And then we will come out to our family and friends."
She lifted her head and stared back at me. I stared at her flushed face. Her eyes
were still glazed with pleasure and her bed hair... Shit. Just looking at her made
my dick twitch.
She looked like she was thoroughly fucked.
"I have a question, though."
My eyes snapped back to hers. "What is it?" I brushed the stray hairs on her cheek
and tucked it behind her ear.
"Am I the only girl in your life?"
My eyes snapped back to her. "You mean aside from my sibs and m-"
She rolled her eyes. "You know what I mean."
Yeah, I know. But I love messing up with her.
I slid my hand to the back of her neck. "Don't you know by now, Salazar?" I
whispered as I pulled her closer. "Babe, you're it for me."
She pouted her lips. "I'm just making it sure."

I grinned as our lips met.
"Yeah, right. I love you, too," I said against her bruised lips.

When It Was Me

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When It Was Me

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When It Was Me

It started with a debate.

He's the guy who doesn't back down to any challenge.

He's the guy that can make your panties drop.

He's also the guy who can make it in a twist.

She's the girl who doesn't hesitate to flip someone off.

She's the girl that can't resist any dare.

She's also the girl everyone loved and hated.

He's the guy who brings out the best in her.

She's the girl who brings out the worst in him.

Louisse Salazar's and Cascade Ongpauco's story.

*Story Timeline: 2013 - 2015

Chapter 1: Eat Shit

"Salazar, sinco. Ongpauco, uno,"Atty. Broassaid as he scribbled on his seat plan. I

Pokerface. Show them it's nothing to you, L.

I slowly breathed in through my nose and exhaled through my mouth soundlessly. I

THE. VERY. FIRST. TIME.

Gods. This is so embarrassing. To think I'm an International Studies student and I

"Class dismissed," Atty. Broas announced. I snapped out of my reverie.

My blockmates immediately scrambled out of the classroom. I took my time to gather

at anyone. Show them what happened didn't grate your ego.

Oh. Hell. No.

Running out of patience, I just raised an eyebrow. Can someone really be so

Wait. What? How come he knows I'm hangover?

I shook my head as I remember my first encounter with Cascade 'Kade' Ongpauco.

He made you dump him, L.

I have my own issue. I can't help him with his demons.

And I have been replaced.

Apparently, the scared little girl fell for the asshole.

Kim persisted. "Nandito lang ako ha?"

I cried harder when I heard his finals words inside my head.

So I did what I was told.

I dumped Kade Ongpauco.

Chapter 2: New OTP

A year and a month ago...

Ugh. Block that thought, Louisse.

"Yup," I huffed, not offering information.

"Sa car ko," I grumbled. What's with the questions?

"E pinangingialaman mo din yung gusto kong book!"

Jamie got in her face. "Pangit kasi yun!"

I chuckled at the memory.

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever, Bella Swan."

I facepalmed myself. What a dork.

Really. Nakaka-insecure to be her seatmate.

All of a sudden, Asher Flores showed her true colors.

"Pitumput pitong putang inang pating!" she shrieked.

"Assholes," I heard her mutter. She noticed me looking at her. "Tinitingin-tingin

"What's up? What did I miss?"

Kade asked as he straightened his legs in front of him.

"Jowa mo, teh?" Asher asked all of a sudden.

Why is he bugging me all of a sudden?! When will he stop?

I looked at Asher. "Partner tayo?"

What? Oh, shit. No.

Kade nudged me. I glared at him. "What?"

I craned my neck and saw only his name on it.

I watched his hand as he wrote again.

He immediately stood up and went in front.

He did not just do what I think he did.

"Mukhang bet ka niya," I heard Asher snickered.

Fuck off, Flores.

Are we gonna study later?

Starbucks Taft. 6PM?

He passed another one.

"Like I'm naked!" I hissed.