April 29 th Lesson—Day 9

1. Attendance

2. HW due today:

a. Turn in Cause & Effect Essay with rubric stapled to front

3. HW for next class:

a. Read Kirszner Ch. 34 & 24

b. Write Compare/Contrast Essay 1st Draft—3 copies!!!

i. Be sure it has
1. Intro with lead-in, bridge, thesis
2. 3-6 body paragraphs with topic sentences, details, & concluding sentences (which
remind of point for comparing—better or worse?)
3. Organization with 1-1 correspondence as discussed
4. Conclusion which summarizes first and then concluding remarks

4. Compare/Contrast Essays

a. Just like with the paragraphs, there are 2 ways to organize these:

i. Subject by Subject

1. Intro—Lead-in, Bridge, Thesis

2. Girl Start of Day

3. Girl School Each a paragraph of its own w/topic, detail,
4. Girl Lunch concluding sentence
5. Girl After School

6. Boy Start
7. Boy School Each a paragraph of its own
8. Boy Lunch
9. Boy After School

10. Conclusion—Summary, Concluding Story or Remarks

ii. Point by Point—probably better!

1. Intro—lead-in, bridge, thesis

2. Boy Start of Day & Girl Start of Day

3. Boy School & Girl School Each a paragraph w/topic, detail,
4. Boy Lunch & Girl Lunch concluding sentence
5. Boy After School & Girl After School

6. Conclusion—Summary, Concluding Story or Remarks

*How is the one on p. 238-239 organized?

 b. Topic Sentences—be sure each body paragraph has a clear topic sentence

i. One way that a boy’s and girl’s days differ is in the way they start.

*Where should this go in the example essay?

c. 1-1 Correspondence—make sure you mention each category of comparison for each subject

i. Clothes with boys v. Clothes with girls

ii. Breakfast with boys v. Breakfast with girls

*Look at body 1 in example—do we see this 1-1 correspondence?

d. Transitions—be sure you use these to indicate the beginning of a new point of comparison (see above)
and when you switch subjects

i. Boys, on the one hand,….

ii. Girls, on the other hand,…
iii. Boys….
iv. However, girls…

*Find these in each paragraph in example

e. Concluding Sentences—these should be included in each body paragraph in the end to remind us of the
point or idea

i. Looking at these differences in the ways boys’ and girls’ days start shows us just how different
the daily lives of each are.

*Where should this conclusion sentence go? Write one for body 2—how can you avoid being repetitive but
still conclude and remind us of the idea?

f. Intro—this should have a lead-in with one of our options, a bridge and the thesis

i. What lead-in option does the example use?

ii. What do you notice the person does after their quote?
iii. Does the thesis have our 3 parts (2 things, diff or sim, and point)?

g. Conclusion—this should summarize and then use one of our options

i. What does the conclusion do? How could it be improved because I would say it is too short?

h. Sample Essay from previous term

i. Lead-In—What strategy does it use?

ii. Thesis—does it have all our parts—2 things, diff/sim, point?
iii. Organization—which method does it use?
iv. Topic Sentences—does each contain a clear one?
v. Details—what kinds of details are used to support each comparison?
vi. Transitions—point each out within paragraphs
vii. Concluding Sentences—does each remind us of the point of the paragraph/essay?
viii. Conclusion—what type of concluding remarks are used?

5. “My Two Lives” p. 674

 a. What is being compared in this essay? The past v present for her cultural identity? Her v her parents?
Indians & Americans? How can you tell?

b. Look at paragraphs 2-3 vs paragraphs 4-5—is this subject by subject or point by point?

c. Is this a good model for out essay? Why or why not?

d. Do you think immigrants should try to be truly bi-cultural, meaning loyal to their home culture and
fluent in their new culture? Or, should immigrants try to leave their home culture (and language)
behind and try to become as American as possible? Is the same true for us as we leave the home and
become independent? Should we be loyal to the agricultural, educational, and moral values from
where we come from?

6. Fragments = an incomplete sentence—one that does not contain a subject, a verb, or both and does not
express a complete thought

a. No Verb—The people over there with footballs on their heads. (what about them?)

b. No Subject—Are my favorite things in the whole world, except for kittens. (what are?)

c. No Subject or Verb—Incredibly special and full of life. (who/what was?)

d. Not a complete thought—Although I did come to every class. (what happened as a result of that?)

i. Do ex. 22.1 on p. 372

e. Common Way it Happens—a fragment is right after the complete sentence it should be attached to

i. This term, there are several classes that I like. Writing 90 and Math 60.

ii. To fix this, just connect the sentences, sometimes as an appositive phrase

1. This term, there are several classes that I like, Writing 90 and Math 60.

iii. Do ex. 22.2 on p. 373 & 22.4 on p. 376

f. Another common way (-ing fragments)—remember that an –ing has to have a helping verb in front of
it to be acting as a verb in a sentence.

1. I get into trouble a lot. Always looking for a shortcut.

2. Often, you can combine these by adding the –ing phrase to the previous sentence as an
appositive phrase or adding a subject and/or verb

a. I get into trouble a lot, always looking for a shortcut.

Or
b. I get into trouble a lot. I am always looking for a shortcut.

3. This is most common with “being”

a. I decided to steal from my mom. The result being she threw me out of the
house.
 b. To fix it, change “being” to a form that is appropriate

i. I decided to steal from my mom. The result was that she threw me out of
the house.

ii. Do. Ex. 22.7 on p. 380

g. Fragments with relative pronouns (386)—these seem to have subjects and verbs but don’t express a
complete thought—remember that a relative clause is a dependent clause and so needs to be connected
to an independent clause

i. The most important thing that she said in class yesterday—what are we missing? Why?

ii. The most important thing that she said in class yesterday was that we need to bring three copies
of our papers.—subjects and verbs?

iii. Do ex. 22.12 on p. 387

iv. Do Editing Practice on p. 390