1.

Today in English class, my teacher was giving us some strange facts, one of them including
that candy canes include a cancer-causing agent. I flipped out. I was in the middle of my
little freak-out when this new kid in the back of the room stands up and says ' I
unfortunately have to inform you that the previously mentioned statement is incorrect.
Santa eats a billion candy canes a year, and he is still healthy enough to deliver us all
presents.' Guess who I sat with at lunch! MLIA
2. Yesterday, my science teacher said she didn't feel like teaching. So what did we do for 2
hours? Watched Magic School Bus, of course!!! Best teacher ever! MLIA
3. A few days ago, I didn't go to my 3rd period class. The next day the teacher asked me why. I
wrote down on a piece of paper that I was on a top secret ninja mission that she can't tell
anyone about because it would endanger the specifis of said mission. She read it looked at
me gave me a discreet nod and went to her desk. MLIA
4. During our first lab in my Honors Chem class, my teacher asked me to flip a switch to turn
on the fans. There was only one there, but as I flipped it he looked terrified and shouted,
"No!! Not that one!!" I turned it off and jumped backwards, scared I just blew up the school,
and the entire class turned to stare at me. After a second he added, "No I'm totally kidding.
That's right," and continued doing his work normally. Hello, favorite teacher. MLIA.
5. Today, a few people in my psychology class were complaining of how cold it was in the
room. The teacher couldn't raise the air, but he went into his storage closet and came out
with Snuggies for everyone in the class without a jacket. MLIA
6. Today in the middle of class my classmate raises his hand to say there was writing in his
book. He says that it says "Mrs. Green is bitchin". Mrs. Green (our teacher) then looks up
"bitchin" on dictionary.com in front of the whole class. It says it means "wonderful". Bitchin
became the word of day and my teacher ended the class by saying, "Have a bitchin day!" I
love my teacher. MLIA
7. My friends and I have a new obsession with the floor is lava game. I walk out of the
bathroom in our school locker room to see two of my friends standing on the sinks. I
proceded to yell the floor is lava, jumped up on the counter, and watched my gym teacher
as she slowly melted in the lava as she played along. New favorite teacher? MLIA
8. One day, my chemistry teacher told us that Gold is always found in nature by itself, so Gold
always goes to the prom alone. A girl asked if Nitrogen was like that, too. The teacher said,
"No, Nitrogen's a ho." He is now my favorite teacher. MLIA
9. Today, I was looking for my math teacher on the second floor of my school. I only found my
English teacher walking into the staff lounge. So, I walked downstairs only to find my English
teacher walking out of his room. I sarcastically asked him if he had a Teleporting machine.
He suspiciously glanced back and forth down the hall ,stared at me seriously and whispered
"You found out, this is our secret now". then, winked at me and walked away as if nothing
had happened. Best teacher ever. MLIA
10. Today at school I was about to enter level three of a building when I noticed a sign on the
door that said 'NO ENTRY!' In a frustrated burst of anger I screamed out 'Why?' My English
teacher who was walking past stopped in his tracks and said 'The third floor corridor is out
of bounds to all who do not wish to die a most painful death.' Needless to say, he is now my
favorite teacher. MLIA
11. Today my teacher assigned us each a book to read. She said she specifically picked one out
for me. I groaned. A few pages into the book, I couldn't stop laughing. The teacher came
over to say," you reached the part didn't you?" I said yes. The whole class stared at us. The
part I was reading? In the book, a boy asked his teacher why they named the book Moby
Dick, trying to be funny. The teacher said, maybe it looked like a Moby. Just like your
parents thought you looked like a Barry, they could have easily thought you looked like a
Dick. New favorite teacher? I think so.MLIA
12. Yesterday while I was supposed to be researching in social studies I decided to play pacman.
When he heard the wakawaka sound my teacher walked up to yell at me. Five minutes later
he was screaming "OMNOMNOM THE GHOSTS!!" while the class cheered me on. New
favorite teacher? i think so.:) MLIA
13. On Friday, the last day of school, we had a Christmas concert! My personal favourite act
was the one where all the male teachers in the school (including our strict head teacher)
dressed up as the Spice girls: costumes complete with fake boobs, and danced to 'Stop right
now'! Epic!! MLIA
14. A while ago, my friend set the mario theme as my ringtone. Five seconds ago It went off in
class at full volume. Everyone looked at me except my teacher who is still dancing. MLIA.
15. Today, my math teacher, who looks an awful lot like Albert Einstein, got a candygram. He
turned bright red and so of course, my class asked who it was from. He wouldn't say, so a
student took it from him and announced to the class,"It's from Sexy Pants!" I laughed very
hard, but I want to know- who is Sexy Pants and why is she sending my math teacher
candygrams? MLIA
16. Today (well actually friday), my school had it's anual christmas concert, and everyone was
thrilled that it lasted all day. But the best part? Watching our teachers dance to "Single
Ladies" in full costume. MSIA (My School is Average).
17. Today, In Bio my teacher put a gummy bear in a test tube with some liquified powder to see
how when sugar breaks down it creates heat and light. What he didn't mentioned was that
it also makes a high pitched sound that sounded like a scream. I was disturbed that I
witnessed a murder of an innocent gummy bear. MLIA
18. Today, my maths teacher gave us a massive lecture on phones in class. Just as he was finished, his
phone rang very loudly with a short stack song. He looked embarressed and quickly left the room to
pick it up. Our male science teacher then ran in, showed us it his him who called and ran back out
giggling. I love our school. MLIA
19. On a History test we were asked, "Who was Michelangelo?". I answered, "Renowned artist/Ninja
Turtle. Wore an orange headband. Weapon: daggers." My teacher marked this wrong and wrote
back "WEAPON: NUN CHUCKS. CHECK YOUR FACTS." Teenage Mutant Ninja Teacher? Awesome.
MLIA
20. Today during science class, one of my friends was playing with his phone. Instead of my teacher
taking his phone and giving him a referral, she took a Nerf Gun out of her desk and shot him with it.
She then proceeded to this whenever someone answered a question wrong or wasn't paying
attention. MLIA
21. Today, my friend bought me one of those invisible ink pens. I was pretty mad at my english teacher,
so I wrote him an angry letter and lots of insults all over my essay. When it was handed back to me,
my teacher had written, "read back" and there was nothing there. I shined the light from my
invisible ink pen and read all the insults my teacher had written about me. MLIA
22. Today in my Algebra 1 class my teacher was asking if he was explaining the math well. A kid in my
class said "it's sexy." After school I got on Facebook and my teachers status was "I make math seem
sexy." MLIA
23. Today at school my science teacher chased me around the classroom with a dirty sock. MLIA
24. Today I was staying after to do a multiple choice quiz. My teacher was standing over me, watching
me choose with what looked like a recorder in his hand. I was struggling with the last question, so I
guessed and put C. I then hear "stop, in the name of love" begin to play then stop. My teacher gave
me the thumbs up. Then I put B. I heard "its gettin hot in here" Finally I put A. Then he played we are
the champions. I got a 100. MLIA.
25. Today, I got back a test I had taken in history. I hadn't known the answer to one of the questions so,
remembering an MLIA I read, I drew a ninja that protected the problem from the evil red pen. My
teacher left me a note saying that he had spent 15 minutes looking for a non-red pen to defeat my
ninja with. MLIA
26. Some freshman at my all girls high school put up a twilight poster over the Harry Potter posters in
the Honors English room. When my english teacher saw it, She screamed, ripped it down, and
placed it on a toilet in the girls bathroom. BEST. TEACHER. EVER. MLIA
27. Today, in history class, we were studying the ancient city states of Ancient Greece. Our teacher (the
classic old history teacher) had a rolling chalkboard with a map of greece, and we tried to label them
of a reading in our textbook. Our teacher pointed at one unmarked city and asked, "What city is
this?" No one answered. After the awkward silence, our teacher yelled "THIS IS SPARTA!" and kicked
the chalkboard to the floor. MLIA
28. Today I told my teacher that I didn't complete the assignment because Google was down and I just
couldn't bring myself to use yahoo. He understood. MLIA
29. Today I was in social studies when the girl who sits in front of me sat down and screamed. The
teacher looked annoyed at asked what was wrong. She said the chair had hurt her. The teacher
suddenly stood up angrily with a yard stick in his hand and told the girl to get out of the chair. We
were terrified thinking he was going to hit her, until the teacher started hitting the chair and
yelling,"bad chair!". I laughed for the rest of the day. MLIA
30. A while ago my AP history teacher was teaching us how to write an essay. His explaination: "Essays
are like skirts, short enough to be interesting, long enough to cover the subject." This will forever be
burned into my memory. MLIA
31. Today, we were in Health class. it was the first class, and the teacher decided to play a game with us;
raising our hands if whatever she said applied to our lives. so she says regular things, like 'if your
favorite color is blue' and what not. Suddenly, she goes 'who here knows someone whose had oral
sex? besides your parents.' after an awkward pause she says 'oh, i went there. now you're picturing
your parents having oral sex.' is that awkward enough? MLIA
32. We took a test in science class and he told us to read ALL of the directions. The directions on the
front were typical fill in the bubble... etc and read the directions on the back before you start. On
the back it said if you want an A+ draw a smiley face on the front side. Guess who was the only one
to get an A+.
33. Yesterday was the first day in my new Biology 2 class and to get to know us all, the teacher gave us
papers to fill out with personal questions about ourselves. One of the questions was "Who's your
favorite TV show character?". Today we got our papers back, and the five girls who put Snooki got a
zero. I put Ash from Pokemon and got extra credit. MLIA
34. Today, my English teacher stated that "J. K. Rowling is just a copier from J.R.R. Tolkien and anyone
who disagrees can go sit in the hall." My whole class sat in the hall. MLIA
35. Today we changed classes at my school. As I walked into my new class, Media Productions, there
was a giant jungle gym set up in the middle of the room with the desks pushed aside. I looked
around, noticing a giant banner on the front board saying "Welcome to The Fortress of Wonder."
New favorite class? I think so. MILA
36. Today, I discovered that my sister's english teacher will not let them write their book reports about
the Twilight series. Harry Potter, however, is perfectly acceptable. MLIA.
37. One day our class decided we were all going to hide because our teacher was late. The closets filled
up and the only place for me to hide was under the teacher's desk. The teacher came in and
immediately found the people in the closet, but not me. He even sat at his desk and didn't see me.
No one seemed to notice I was missing, so I stuck my hand out from under the desk and made it
crawl along the floor like a giant spider. Half the class jumped, but the teacher still didn't notice me.
Everyone started whispering and giggling to themselves. The teacher scowled at the class and in a
serious voice asked, "What's going on? Did somebody fart or something?" He caught me because I
burst out laughing. MLIA
38. Today, we were learning abuot genetics. The example my teacher used on PowerPoint? The wizard
gene is recessive and the muggle gene is dominant. Harry and Ginny would have all wizard children
but Ginny and Dudley's children would only have a one in four chance of being a wizard. Hermione
and Ron would also have all wizard children. Filch is a mutant. Epic. MLIA
39. I was in English class, listening to a conversation about twilight going on behind me. Most of the
words comming out of the girls mouth were "Robber Pattinson", "Hot", and "Vampire". From this
point, they went on to complain about all the people who liked Harry Potter better than Twilight. I
thought I was getting annoyed, when my teacher threw her chalk to the ground and walked over to
the girls behind me."I guess your not aware, but Robert Pattinson was a wizard way before he was a
vampire, and he was so much hotter then." On the way back to the front she recieve 3 highfives, and
a hug. MLIA.
40. A couple weeks ago I was taking a vocabulary quiz. The word was cherubic which means, resembling
a childlike angel. After you write the definition you have to write a sentence, so I wrote," Television
depicts newborns as cherubic when they really look like Smeagle from Lord of the Rings until they
are about three months old." After getting the test back he has put a note on the test right under my
sentence that says,"Beautiful. We called my friend's child Gollum until he was 8." He is now my
favorite teacher. MLIA.
41. Today, I was in math class and i was complaining to my teacher about how I skipped breakfast and I
was super hungry. Just as the period ended she came up to me and told me she didn't have a class
next period and asked if i wanted to go to the McDonalds a few miles from school. I skipped school
with my math teacher. New favorite teacher? I think so! MLIA
42. Today, I found out my Math teacher gave a student an old, broken cell phone so he could stage a
scene where he'd snap it in half because the student "texted" during class at the beginning of the
year. We were terrified for months and have not even used our cell phones in that class. I'm onto
you, Mr. Holstein. MLIA
43. The other day in my sociology class we were using markers. One girl raised her hand and told the
teacher her marker was dead. The teacher then shouted "Oh no! we need to do marker CPR!" The
girl had a puzzled look on her face. The teacher then grabbed the marker, put it on the table
pressing on it 3 times and shouted "Live damn it!" After repeating this a couple of times the marker
worked. Best. Teacher. Ever. MLIA