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com

Body Language and Attraction, 2 nd


Edition
www.dating-nation.com

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Fo llow on Tw it te r: ht tp :/ /tw i tt er .com /joann efal lwat er
B ef rie nd on Fa ceboo k: Joanne Fallwater
F re e E b o o ks , D a t in g T ip s a n d A d v i ce : www.da ting-na tio n.com

Prologue

This is the second edition of Body Language and Attraction.


After the astounding response to the first edition, I decided
to put together a second edition sporting more information,
and links to further reading where appropriate.

As you begin to enjoy this book, be aware that distribution is


encouraged. Spread it around in any way you see fit. All I
ask is that you don’t sell it for profit. This information
should be freely available for all.

And a favour, if you feel inclined to help: should you have a


website, blog, or webpage somewhere on the face of the
internet, link back to the site this ebook came from, with the
following code:

<a href="http://www.dating-nation.com">Dating
Advice</a>

For more ebooks like this one, information, and advice, visit:
www.dating-nation.com. Enjoy!

Joanne.

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Contents

1. Introduction, So Where Do We Start?


2. Rules for Accurate Body Language Reading
3. Practice Makes Perfect

4. The Eyes are the Windows to the Soul


5. Dilating Pupils
6. Looking Up
7. Eye Contact

8. Smiling Makes the World Go Round


9. Tight Lips
10. Sideways, Looking Up

11. You're all Hands

12. Arm Signals


13. Crossed Arms over Chest
14. Self Hug
15. Elbow Touching

16. The Body Points to Where the Mind Wants to Go


17. Open Positioning
18. Closed Positioning

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19. Leg and Foot Pointing

20. Personal Territory


21. Touch and Personal Claim
22. General Flirting and Attraction Gestures
23. Conclusion
24. Recommended Reading
25. Love Systems
26. Contact Me

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Introduction; So Where Do We Start?

Well, what is body language? Technically, it’s been defined


as the nonverbal and mostly unconscious communication
through use of gestures such as posture, facial expressions,
hand movements, and alike.

With training, the ability to notice and define body language


can be used to reveal the true thoughts, intentions, and
current emotional condition of everyone.

Various studies have concluded that face to face


communication consists of a less than 35% verbal
Component, and an 85% non verbal component.

Examples of this are seen in every day life; but few notice
them. For example a woman who isn’t having a good time at
the bar will sit with her arms crossed, legs crossed, and a
slight frown on her face, and the guy who’s trying to impress
her might display the typical “cowboy pose” of hands in
pockets with thumbs protruding, pointing at his crotch.

The purpose of this ebook is to help you become aware of


the varying body language used by those feeling attraction
for another; because the more aware you become, the better

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able you are to determine whether someone has a crush on


you.

As well as being able to spot gestures of attraction, this


ebook will teach you gestures of dislike too – it’s important
to know these in order to gain a balanced view of a person’s
true feelings.

Rules for Accurate Body Language Reading

One of the most common mistakes a rookie body language


reader could make is to interpret individual gestures in
isolation of other gestures.

For example, when someone rubs their left hand on their


right arm it can indicate many things – negative feelings,
sore arm, or perhaps they’re just cold. It all depends on the
other gestures being displayed at the time.

With this in mind it’s important to remember that external


circumstances influence gestures made at any given
moment. A classic and often used example is the “woman in
miniskirt” who sits with her ankles crossed tightly in front of
her.

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If you remember that ankle crossing is usually associated


with negativity and defence you might believe that this
woman’s feeling a little angry or unhappy.

But then you realise the surroundings, and the size of her
skirt, then realise that she has to keep her ankles (and legs)
crossed for certain obvious and necessary reasons – perhaps
she’s just trying to stop people seeing up her skirt!

Practice Makes Perfect

Reading body language isn’t always easy, but it is always fun


(and useful!). You’ll agree that the more you practice
reading it, the better you’ll get. My suggestion is that you
take at least 15 minutes each day and dedicate it to reading
people’s body language. This way, in time it’ll become
second nature.

The Eyes are the Windows to the Soul

A very true and often used saying; the eyes are the windows
to the soul. Perhaps not literally! But they do tell us a whole
bunch of useful information about a person’s thoughts and
feelings.

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Dilating Pupils

When you’re feeling positive, when you like the


company you’re in, and when you hear something you
agree with, your pupils dilate.

Likewise the opposite is true when people are feeling


negative and dislike a situation – their pupils contract.

Dilating pupils are known within the body language


community as ‘micro-gestures’, because they cannot be
consciously controlled and often go unnoticed by the
untrained eye.

Although dilating pupils are often a signal that a person


likes you, it’s important to read this gesture in context.
Pupils also dilate and contract with changing light
conditions; they contract in bright light, and dilate in
low light. Read this micro-gesture in context with other
gestures and surrounding conditions.

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‘Looking Up’

Used frequently by women everywhere, this gesture


involves lowering the head at the neck, and looking
upwards at the other person.

This gesture makes you appear more childlike and


evokes a parenting reaction in both men and women. If
someone uses this gesture with you, it’s likely that they
want to be perceived as cute and vulnerable.

Eye Contact

Making lots of eye contact is a way to show interest and


respect. The more eye contact you make, the more the
person likes you. Studies have actually shown that the
more you look into someone’s eyes the more romantic
and enjoyable they find you, and your company.

On the other hand, too much eye contact early on in a


relationship can sometimes make people feel under
pressure; they might be weirded out!

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To make a great first impression, build up a slight


rapport first, and gradually increase the amount of eye
contact you’re giving.

Smiling Makes the World Go Round

Money doesn’t make the world go round – smiling does! It’s


infectious. It spreads happiness all over. It’s true - you can
brighten someone’s day just by smiling the ‘right’ smile.

There are different types of smiles – guys in particular don’t


realise it though. If you’re one of the guys who can
distinguish the types of smile, you’re a little ahead of the
rest. If you’re one of the guys that was clueless about this,
you’re about to become an expert!

Many people use a fake smile to make them appear polite


and agreeable. A fake smile can always be spotted because
it involved only the jaw muscles working. A true smile
involves both the jaw muscles, and the muscles around the
eyes. That’s where the adage “you smile with your eyes”
comes from.

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A true smile often produces crows feet in even the most


baby-faced of people, in addition to this the teeth are
usually visible. A smile honest and true is an indicator that a
person likes you. Here is a list of smiles we commonly see
from day to day:

Tight Lips

A tight lipped smile is spotted frequently. It’s exactly


what it says on the tin – the lips are stretched across
the face forming a near-straight line. The teeth are not
visible.

The tight lipped smile is often used by someone who’s


hiding something they don’t want to share. It’s also
often used by those who’re “just being polite”.

It’s a favourite used by women who don’t want to show


that they don’t like someone. Most men were
completely oblivious to the true meaning of this smile,
until now.

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Sideways, Looking Up

This gesture consists of two parts; a bigger, friendlier


variation of the tight lipped smile where the lips are
loose, and the ‘looking up’ gesture from the eyes
section.
It’s a common gesture used by women to convey that
they like, or are attracted to someone.

This smile evokes the parental, caring instinct in men,


who see this person displaying this gesture as playful
and youthful.

You’re all Hands

There are two basic rules to remember when looking at hand


gestures: open palms = openness, honesty, and liking,
closed palms (where you can see the back of someone’s
hands) suggests hiding something, being closed to ideas, or
are feeling as though they’re in authority.

Life is riddled with examples of this. When people apologize


to each other they might say something like “I’m sorry”
coupled with presenting their two open palms.

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Open palmed gestures are like saying “I feel comfortable


around you, I like you, I’m being honest, and I have nothing
to hide”. If you see someone making opened palm gestures
at you, take this to heart and read their other gestures to
confirm how they’re really feeling.

Arm Signals

They’re used in other things besides guiding planes you


know! Arm signals are used frequently and are commonplace
in any person’s body language repertoire.

In body language, the arms are known as barriers put up to


protect a person from harm. They’re typically used to
gesture when a person’s lacking self confidence, feels
threatened, or just doesn’t want to hear what another
person’s preaching.

They’re not a definitive “I don’t like you”, however they do


indicate when a person’s having negative feelings. If
someone’s using repetitive arm gestures coupled with
crossed legs and ankles, you’ll know it’s time to change the
conversation.

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Crossed Arms over Chest

Both arms folded across the chest – Coupled with a


strong frown this has a universal meaning: “I don’t
agree with what you’re saying, I am uncertain, I don’t
like this situation”.

Guys often use this gesture exude dominance and


strength – sometimes to detrimental effect when
they’re wanting to pick up women.

Women on the other hand, use this gesture to signal


that they feel threatened, unhappy, or under pressure –
they typically cross their arms over their breasts.

Self Hug

The self hug is characterized by one arm at a person’s


side, and the other arm clutching at their elbow. As
children, our parents and carers hug us when we’re
feeling sad, uncertain or tense.

The self hug is an attempt to recreate the feelings or


safety and security we got from those lovely parental
hugs. A person using this gesture is likely to be feeling

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insecure. Be sure to use this knowledge to your


advantage; if you know the person’s feeling insecure,
do things to make them feel more comfortable.

Elbow Touching

People like to be touched. Interestingly, studies show


that people who touch others’ elbows are more liked
and loved than those who do no touching at all. I write
elbows in italics because it’s just that, elbows only.

The reason elbow touching is acceptable is because it’s


far away from the intimate parts of the body; touch a
stranger anywhere above or below the elbow and their
reaction may be a little different!

It’s a fact that girls do more touching than guys but


equally; if a guy or girl touches your elbow it’s a sure
sign they like you, and want your attention.

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The Body Points to Where the Mind Wants to Go

The body points, the mind goes. The angles people adopt
during any interaction speak volumes about how they feel,
where they want to go, and who they want to be with.

Open Positioning

Just like with palm gestures, when a person likes and is


interested in you, they’ll adopt an open position. They’ll
face their body at yours in varying degrees. The rule is
that the closer you are to actually standing face to
face, the closer and more in like with you they feel.

Typical “we’re just friends” encounters will see a 45


degree pointing angle, whereas an “I really like this
person” encounter sees an angle between 0-45 degrees.

Closed Positioning

Closed positioning is used when two people want a bit


of privacy. You’ll see this when two people are really in
like or love – they’ll simply stand there and face each
other. It’s a signal they like you!

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Leg and Foot Pointing

Remember that the body points to where the mind


wants to go. Watch out for body pointing as an
indicator of like and interest, but also be aware of leg
and foot pointing.

You’ll see in clubs that women’s feet point to the most


attractive (or most interesting) guy in their immediate
field of view – it’s another sign of interest.

The same is true of guys on girls; they’ll be standing,


or facing the girl they’re most interested in. If you look
carefully, you’ll often notice that a seated man’s knee
will be pointed in the direction of the girl he finds most
attractive.
Also notice that when someone wants to leave the
room, their feet will often be pointing at the door
before they even say they want to leave.

Personal Territory

It’s a scientific fact that when two people are closer


emotionally; they’ll stand, sit, and lie closer than those

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who’re not. Imagine a bubble around each and every person.


The bubble encompasses the person, and a small area
around the person.

To a person, everything inside their bubble is known as their


“personal space”. The size of a person’s personal space
differs slightly from person to person, but generally falls
within a certain range:

When people are ultra close – for example: lovers, spouses,


close friends, or children, they can be seen standing
between 15 and 45 centimetres of each other. Only those
who’re emotionally close to us can stand at that distance
without us feeling intimidated and under pressure.

Touch and Personal Claim

People touch and lean against things that they feel are
theirs. For example, a person will sometimes lean on their
walls at home, but wouldn’t dream of being invited into a
stranger’s house then leaning on their walls. Lovers hold
hands, brush each other’s arms, or “tidy” their partner up by
brushing imaginary lint off their shoulder.

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One of the most unmistakable signals made by women to


show claim to a man, is when she places her flat palm on his
chest. Similarly, a man will place his hand on his partner’s
waist or back.

They key thing to remember here is that we touch things we


feel are ours and we do this in a variety of ways. Watch for
the slightest touches; fingers, arms, or even feet – they’re
signs of attraction and desire.

General Flirting and Attraction Gestures

When in the company of the opposite sex, the body language


of both sexes changes dramatically. Men stand a little taller
with no slouching or slumping.

They’ll stick their chests out and suck in their stomachs –


they’ll usually do everything they can to appear more
dominant. These actions happen automatically around
women he’s taken fancy to, or finds attractive.

If a woman takes a liking to the described man, she’ll


respond to his gestures by drawing attention to her breasts,
tilting her head, touching and playing with her hair, and

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exposing her wrists. She does this to make herself appear


more submissive.

There are of course, more deliberate and seductive flirting


and attraction gestures which are made, consciously. They’re
much easier to spot yet most people miss them, and they
represent a much stronger attachment because they’re done
by someone who’s actually trying to get your attention.
Many of these are described in the Body Language Project.

Conclusion

I hope you’ve enjoyed reading this book as much as I’ve


enjoyed writing it. Body language is a subject far too deep
to be covered in such a short space, although I do feel I’ve
at least brought light to some of the main points you should
watch out for, if you’re looking for attraction.

Recommended Reading:

The Body Language Project is an extremely interesting


project, further exploring the body language signs and
signals used in attraction.

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It’s the perfect partner for this ebook because it explains in


greater depth the things explained here, as well as other
important signs and signals used in attraction.

Video and photo examples are included, so you can actually


see the body language. Sounds great, doesn’t it?

Click here to visit the Body Language Project website.

Love Systems

“We are Love Systems, the GUARANTEED method that can


teach any man how to approach, talk to, and seduce or date
beautiful women”

Featured on Fox News, Dr Phil, WGN 9 News, the Tyra


Banks show, and in the international best selling book, The
Game, Love Systems teach ordinary, run of the mill guys
how to meet and seduce amazing women.

Their flagship book Magic Bullets is an impressive read,


and outlines a set of methods guaranteed to get you almost
any woman you want, regardless of money or looks.

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The entire thing is routed in female psychology, so it’s


guaranteed to work. Sounds amazing? If you’d like to learn
more, watch the videos on the Love Systems website.

And if you’d like to know how to seduce any woman you like;
whether she’s the one you’ve been after for ages, or just
that hot girl across the street, go grab yourself a copy of
Love Systems’ flagship book, Magic Bullets.

Contact Me

If you’d like to get in touch with me for whatever reason,


there are many methods:

Dating Nation: http://www.dating-nation.com/forums/


Twitter: http://twitter.com/joannefallwater
Facebook: Joanne Fallwater

I’d love to hear your opinion on this ebook! And finally; I


wish you all the best in love and life.

Joanne Fallwater.

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