EXPLORING

SELF-COMPASSION
A five-day self-reflective writing guide
created by Lisa Olivera

WRITING GUIDES US
BACK TO OURSELVES.
It allows us to reflect,
engage, tune inward,
and explore what's there,
over and over.
My hope with this five-day personal exploration is not that you
will get answers from me; instead, my hope is that you will access
your own innate wisdom, understanding, and knowing. That you'll
find more clarity around certain aspects of you who are. That
you'll create a starting point for yourself -- a place to work from.
Self-compassion is an ongoing practice. It's one that ebbs and
flows, that hardens and softens, that shifts and changes as we do.
It's okay if it feels hard sometimes - if you aren't sure what it
even looks like. Hopefully this exploration will give you some
insight into what it could look like for you.

INSIDE THE GUIDE

Introduction
Five pages correlating with five days of journaling
Closing, resources, and reminders
WELCOME!
I'm so glad you're here.

I created this writing exploration because self-compassion as a
practice has changed my life. As someone who has experienced
decades of self-criticism to a debilitating degree, shifting into a
more kind way of being with myself has created opportunities to
live more fully, believe in myself more wholly, and forgive myself
over and over. It's allowed me to accept my full humanity, which
is something that has been more healing than most things.
I hope you find this practice illuminating,
nurturing, and supportive. The intention
is to truly stick to one prompt per day --
not to skip ahead, but to actually allow
yourself to move through it in a paced
way. You might be tempted to do it all at
once, but I imagine you'll get more out of
it if you create a little ritual from it.

Writing has also long been an important resource for me to tune

inward, explore, and express myself. It's a space where we can be
fully honest, sit with ourselves, recognize what we're holding, and
find ways of navigating what we might need.
Terms like self-compassion can feel really vague and difficult to
grasp at first, which is why I think writing about these ideas and
exploring them within yourself can be so powerful: it turns
vagueness into action.
I also created a writing exploration because I think you have more
wisdom, knowledge, and understanding with you than you might
give yourself credit for. It's so easy to think you need to turn to
someone else for answers, for what's true for you, or for what you
need. The truth, though, is that you also contain so much within
you already -- you might just need some support tapping into it.
Writing is a beautiful way of doing so.
You'll find five days of reflection and
prompts. Use them in your journal, type
out what comes up on your laptop, or
find another way of exploring them that
feels good for you. There is no right or
wrong here -- what matters is that you
are choosing to carve out this time for
yourself. It's a gift.
Thank you so much for taking this time
for yourself. May it bring you whatever
you are looking for. Take good care.
Warmly,
Lisa

“Having compassion starts and ends with having compassion for all
those unwanted parts of ourselves, all those imperfections that we
don't even want to look at." Pema Chodron

Created by Lisa olivera

 DAY ONE:
Exploring self-compassion

Welcome to Day One!

In today’s writing prompt, I invite you to start exploring what self-
compassion means to you. You may have no idea what I’m talking about
when I use that phrase, you may already implement it in your life often, or
you may fall somewhere in between. Wherever you may be in this process,
this prompt is a chance to simply explore what comes up when you think
about self-compassion.

Self-compassion always starts with understanding our relationship with it.

It starts with bringing awareness, mindfulness, and consciousness to our
internal process, to the way we talk to ourselves, to how we approach
challenge, and to the ways our internal dialogue positively and negatively
impact our days. Through answering the simple questions in today’s
prompt, my hope is that you will start illuminating some of what may feel
automatic for you. When we bring attention to how we live each day, we
create more space to start shifting, to make small changes, and to
ultimately find ways to treat ourselves more kindly and with
more tenderness.

Don’t hesitate to let me know what comes up for you through this prompt!
And remember the process is more important than the outcome here.
Take good care, and thank yourself for being here.

Writing prompt, day one:

When you hear the phrase 'self-compassion', what
comes to mind? What thoughts or feelings arise within
you? What are your initial reactions when thinking
about the role self-compassion plays in your life, or
where it may be lacking?

Created by Lisa olivera

 DAY TWO:
Exploring the inner critic

Welcome to Day Two! In today’s writing prompt,

I invite you to start exploring your inner critic. This is the inner voice we
all have that tends to berate us, beat us up, criticize our every move, and
treat us like crap. The inner critic comes from so many places: from our
childhood, our environment, from culture and society, from wider
messages received in the media and from our own self-concept. It’s a
complex part of who we are and there isn’t one answer as to how it forms
or why. In exploring your inner critic, don’t forget to be kind to yourself
(which may feel counter-intuitive as we think about all the negative things
we say to ourselves throughout the day!). Getting curious around how this
part of you might show up, what it feels like, and how it impacts you can
be so helpful in gaining more understanding of the role it plays in your life.
From here, we again have more room to shift, to pivot, and to change the
way we approach ourselves.

As always, don’t hesitate to let me know what comes up for you through
this prompt! Feel free to use it however it feels nurturing for you to do so.
Showing up for yourself in this way - even that act alone - is such a gift and
such a way of recognizing your deservedness of carving out space for
yourself in small and big ways. Bravo to you.

Writing prompt, day two:

What does your inner critic say the most? What does it
try to convince you of? What does it sound like? Does it
echo any messages you've heard externally? Where do
you think it comes from? How might it be holding
you back?

Created by Lisa olivera

 DAY THREE:
Exploring curiosity

Welcome to Day Three! In today’s writing prompt, I invite you to start

exploring what curiosity means to you. Curiosity is such an important part
of how we approach what feels challenging, as well as what feels good. I
imagine curiosity as a bridge between what we think and what we do. It
allows us to let go of assumptions and automatic thoughts and instead
make space to explore what else could be true -- what else could be
possible. When we think about getting curious, it might feel uncomfortable
or unnatural at first. If your tendency is to turn immediately to criticism or
judgment, thinking about curiosity might be challenging. Be gentle with
yourself here! This is simply an invitation to explore and get curious about
curiosity (as weird as that sounds!). What is your relationship with curiosity
right now? How does it feel to even think about the idea of utilizing more
curiosity in your life? Explore these prompts in whatever way feels good
and helpful for you.

Once again… don’t hesitate to let me know what comes up for you through
this prompt! Feel free to print the template, write in your journal, or type –
whatever feels best for you. And remember: the process is more important
than the outcome here. Let yourself be with your process, no matter where
it is. Sending you comfort as you explore getting more
curious! Take good care, and thank yourself for being here.

Writing prompt, day three:

How might replacing criticism with curiosity fuel more
self-compassion in your life? What does it feel like to
approach yourself with curiosity instead of judgment?
Where can you become. more curious in your life?

Created by Lisa olivera

 DAY FOUR:
Creating a self-compassion affirmation

Welcome to Day Four! In today’s writing prompt, I want to introduce you to one of my
favorite self-compassion practices: the Self-Compassion Affirmation, developed by
Kristin Neff (who calls it a mantra, but I find affirmation to be more accessible). It’s
actually an incredibly helpful and supportive tool that you can utilize anytime.

A self-compassion mantra includes three components: mindfulness, common

humanity, and self-kindness. I’ll break these down below:

Mindfulness: Becoming aware of the present moment; paying attention to what is

arising within you, moment to moment, without judgment (the most important part!)
Common Humanity: Recognizing yourself in others; knowing you
are not alone in what you are experiencing; reminding yourself of the
commonality of our experiences and acknowledging that others feel similarly at
different points.
Self-Kindness: Introducing compassion to ourselves; saying something nourishing and
supportive to ourselves; offering ourselves compassion and support.

A self-compassion mantra includes these three components. Here’s an example: “I’m

feeling really anxious right now and my heart is beating quickly. A lot of people feel
this way, and I know I’m not alone. May I offer myself kindness in this moment." The
beautiful thing about creating our own self-compassion mantra is that we can make it
unique, individual, and personal. It can be tailored to whatever you may be going
though, and it allows us to invite more of these three components into our moments of
challenge. In today’s prompt, I invite you to create your own mantra. You can do with it
whatever you please: you can type it up, write it in your journal, tape it to your mirror,
save it as a phone background… anything that might feel supportive for you.

Writing prompt, day four:

Using the guide above, create a self-compassion
affirmation that feels personal and supportive for you.
What does it feel like to say this to yourself? Where might
you want to remind yourself of this affirmation? How might
speaking to yourself this way shift your experience?
Created by Lisa olivera
 DAY FIVE
Being kind to you

Welcome to Day Five! You’ve made it to the last prompt of this little series. How are you
feeling? What has it been like to reflect on these themes? What’s come up for you? Do you
notice anything different in how you think about these concepts, or what they mean to
you? Are you feeling any shifts internally or physically? Have any surprising thoughts or
emotions arisen through your reflections? How are you feeling about moving forward and
carrying what’s come up for you along?

Self-reflection and inquiry can be beautiful, and it can also be challenging. If you’ve found
yourself surprised or challenged by anything you’ve explored through these prompts, I
invite you to reach out, to connect with your support system, or to think about what you
may want to add to your supports. Caring for ourselves as we navigate implementing these
processes into our lives is so important and valuable.

I hope you can honor the fact that you chose to show up for yourself through these
prompts; even something as simple as writing down what comes up for us can bring about
a lot of internal shifts and, if nothing else, can illuminate what might or might not be
working for us. It is my wish that exploring these themes inspires you to start finding new
ways of implementing and practicing them in your life moving forward. I truly believe we
all deserve to treat ourselves kindly, to nourish ourselves intentionally, and to talk to
ourselves the way we would talk to those we love. Again, this is a simple introduction and
an invitation to continue exploring! I thank you and honor your for showing up for yourself
in this intentional and valuable way. It matters, and it is important, and it deserves your
own recognition. Thank you for choosing to give yourself this space.

Writing prompt, day five:

What has it been like to reflect on your inner critic,
curiosity, self-compassion, and creating an affirmation?
What thoughts, feelings, and sensations have arisen as
you've embarked on this little writing journey? How
might you continue exploring these parts of you? What
do you want to carry forward with you?
Created by Lisa olivera
 I also want to offer a few
REFLECTION AND resources that might support
you in continuing to explore
RESOURCES these themes:

To continue exploring and tuning inward

Kristin Neff's Website: Self-
Compassion

Welcome back! I hope you're landing here after Self-Compassion Video

moving though the prompts from the last five days. I
want to check in after finishing this series to see how Self-Compassion vs. Self-
things have landed for you. Esteem

Self-Compassion book
Some reflection questions to ponder:
What was it like to carve out space for yourself Self-Compassion Deck
for the last five days?
Self-Compassion Workbook
What came up for you that felt surprising,
challenging, or illuminating?
Thank you for participating,
How has it felt to reflect on these themes -- to
showing up for yourself, and
think about how they impact you? engaging in exploration of what
How might you carry your reflections forward these themes mean to you. I
and create space for continued exploration? hope it has served you well. I'm
In what ways has thinking about self- looking forward to connecting
compassion sparked inspiration within you? with you further and bringing
you more ways to engage with,
These are just bites to chew on. Let them marinate, explore, and heal within
simmer, and take your time in thinking through these yourself and in your daily life.
questions!
Warmly, Lisa

Created by Lisa olivera