Being you-chapter one-part two

Finding the Free-Will Universe

(Or, at least, how I started to find mine….)

See, I used to have a lot of answers, or at least I pretended I

did.

Ten years ago, I was starting my second chiropractic practice,

and I even had some patients. I was making almost enough to

pay my rent: Oh Joy! I had a girlfriend that everybody said

was the perfect girl for me.

I had everything that was supposed to make you happy here,

except loads of money, but that wasn’t

was supposed to make you happy here, except loads of money,

but that wasn’t that important to me. I had tried every single

modality for inner peace I could find, but I was still dying

inside.

So I told the Universe; “ You have six months or I’m killing

myself. I’ve been here working for you, trying to bring

awareness to people, trying to change their lives and their

bodies, and trying to change things for the better on the

planet, and nothing is coming back to me. I hate waking up in

the morning! If that’s the way it’s got to be—fine. But I’m

killing myself. Either things change or I am out

of here.”

I didn’t just mean out of my relationship or Santa Barbara, I

meant out of this

life.

“There has got to be someplace happier, some other body,

some other life. I’ll come back as a gypsy, or a pacific islander,

where I get to hang out in the islands all day. Or maybeI’ll

come back as a Rockefeller and have buckets of

money. There has to be something different. There has to be

something better.

Maybe some other planet … ???”

I was willing to end it, because I got to the point where what

was, was not enough. I knew it, and it gave me this place of

being able to not have as valuable what I had decided was

valuable in the past.

Everything that I had decided was valuable, I had. And it

wasn’t valuable. Do you know what I mean? Have you ever been

there, even briefly, to that place? If so, this book will

probably make a lot of sense to you.

Literally a week after I made this demand, I saw an ad in the

paper, a tiny little classified ad. It said, “Access: All of life

comes to me with ease and joy and glory,” and it had this girl’s

phone number.

My reaction was: “Pollyanna put an ad in the paper!” I was

furious. “My life is pain, suffering and gory! What are you

talking about? Ease, joy and glory.

What is that?” I literally throttled the paper and threw it

away. Now, this paper comes out once a week in Santa

Barbara, and the next week I saw the ad again:

“Access: All of life comes to me with ease and joy and glory.”

ARGHHHH!

But long before seeing this ad, I had realized that if you’re in

total resistance to something, there’s probably something in it

for you, you just don’t know what it something, there’s

probably something in it for you, you just don’t know what it

is yet. So, since I just wanted to kill the person who put the

ad in the paper, I called her and made an appointment….

Call it Divine Inspiration, call it insanity, call it grasping for a

lifeboat just before the Titanic that was my life made its

final shuddering plunge into the abyss … That phone call

literally gave me access to my life, and I have not been

able to squeeze myself into the box that used to be me ever

again. I am so, so grateful.

I had a session with the girl, an Access Bars session, a simple

process of touching points on the person’s head. After this

session I had the first sense of peace I’d had in almost three

years. It was the first time I remember knowing everything

was OK, everything always had been, and everything always

would be … and I never contemplated suicide again.

tool, one thing, a process that took about an hour … from

someone I’d never even met before … and it changed the

energy of my whole life and what I knew was possible.

That is what I’m hoping to share with you in this book—the

energetic awareness that a different energy is possible for

you, too.

Because it’s the energy of your life you’re looking to change.

I used to do all these things, all these spiritual modalities, and

think, “I want to change this thing, and this thing….” But even

if the thing changed, if the energy was still the same, it didn’t

matter.

Do you know what I mean?