‘look down atthe sereen after aloud beep. Franticaly, [press the combination of buttons need io press in order to sce what I had just done. OK, dowa. down, dowa, OK, OK. I check the ate, Cctober 19, 2017. I check the time. 10:15 PM. Then I check the dosage. 25U. Isnup back toreality when I realize what Id just done. “Puck” Isay out loud as I clip The Monitor 10 my side. “Calm down, you've planned for this, Don will guide you, jut fix this then tell him monday,” tink to myself for seassuraace. ‘Nine years, and todays the day I snap. I've planned for this fora long time, but not today. Not walk out of my bedroom to notice my parents already asieep. That helps due tothe fact, that T'd like Don to explain to my parents that the their son is suicidal. 1 know that's @ conversation they don’t want to have, but they'll have to eventually face the facts. I tura right ‘ang head down the sixteen stops it kes to get tomy living room. Turning to my let 1 hea into the kitchen and head straight forthe refrigerator. “Carbs, carbs, 1 need carbs.” I think to myself as T look through the fridge, The first ‘thing I see tht fits the description, « fll six ounce container of raspberries. Perfect. I down the ‘whole thing. After doing the calculations, was erly twenty-one cabs. Given that I'm on acne to eight insulin to carb ratio, and just took fifteen units, 1"! need a hundred and twenty carbs in ‘order to counteract the insulin. {continuously eat a lot of food, to the point where it's quite ebvious I went over the hundred and twenty mark. After finishing my fantic eas, I sit down at my kitchen table and try to collect my thoughts. Two words were constandy coming up in my head, how and why? As ‘much as I wanted to answer them, I couldn't At that point, I had decided to give up on snewering the questions and just tr to recollect the evens go I can explain it to Don. 1 get up from the table and walk over tothe living room closet to find my jacket. In my Jacket, I reach into the inside pocket for my notebook. I grab the notebook, the pen, and then hhead back tothe kitchen. Before I write anything inthe notebook, {decide to make cup of hot chocolat, then sit down, {pick up the green pen and just let my mind do the writing