Parents of Children with Special Needs (interview)

Study Guide (Page 1 of 2)

Gerunds
When we want to use a verb like a noun in a sentence, we use the gerund form. To get the
gerund, we add an –ing suffix to the verb. This looks exactly like one of the participle forms,
but remember, the function is different. Participles always act like adjectives, gerunds always
function as nouns.

His favorite thing was twirling balls or other objects. (object)

He did not like boarding certain vehicles. (object)
He did not like putting on new types of clothes. (object)
He insisted on putting on his let shoe first. (object of preposition)
Instead of calling people with autism low or high functioning, DSM distinguishes three
functional levels. (object of preposition)
Being loved more will help them. (subject)
Sometimes they blame it on our parenting. (object of preposition)
My sister blamed me for talking too much. (object of preposition)
He complains about not having enough time to listen to his music. (object of preposition)
I get them to stop screaming about going to school. (object of preposition)
Both taking them to school and picking them up are kind of tiring. (subjects)
I wish I had some good tips for cooperating with them. (object of preposition)
Shopping or being at a playground can be difficult with them. (subjects)
Being the mother of a special-needs child can have a positive effect on your life. (subject)

Frequency Words
This is a very simple and useful structure to use. When the verb is in present simple tense
(describing something that happens regularly) or past simple tense, you put a frequency word
between the subject and the verb. The most common frequency words are never (soha),
rarely / seldom (ritkán), occasionally (alkalmilag), sometimes* (néha), periodically
(időszakosan), usually / frequently (gyakran), often (gyakran), and always (mindig).

* With sometimes, the word order is not so strict. It can occur almost anywhere in the sentence.

Look at these sentences from the text (word order simplified for examples):
He often babbled, and he always wanted our company.
We don’t often go to the movies. (OR: We often don’t go to the movies.)
Our district nurse regularly visited us.
Imitation is seen rarely in children with autism.
I usually prepare their lunch in the morning.
What he says usually makes no sense to other people.
I normally take two mornings and three afternoons.
Sometimes they take care of them on the weekends.
That occasionally requires physical strength.
I have to work long hours sometimes.
We occasionally brought flowers.
They regularly hold meetings.
They always are open to discussion.
One parent sometimes has to stay at home.
 Parents of Children wit Special Needs (interview)
Study Guide (Page 2 of 2)

Repeated or Accustomed Actions in the Past – 3 grammar structures

Past Continuous with “constantly” My kid was constantly running around.
“Would” + verb He would always walk the same route.
“Kept” + verb + -ing suffix He kept hitting me. / He kept hitting himself.

Using Past Tense to Imply (Suggest) Something Untrue

He said he is an expert. (I still believe this.)
He said he was an expert. (I already know this is not true.)

Something similar happens in this sentence: “As if we haven’t tried everything within our
means already!” Mintha nem próbáltunk volna… We have tried everything that we can
afford.

With the verb “wish”, we use past simple tense (and always “were” for “to be”) when
something is not true. We use past perfect tense for something that DID NOT HAPPEN.

I wish I had one billion dollars. (I don’t)

I wish I were taller. (I am not as tall as I want to be.)
I wish I had some good tips for cooperating with them. (I don’t have any good tips.)
I wish I could live someone else’s life. (I can’t)
She wishes she hadn’t had the baby. (But she did have the baby.)
She wishes she hadn’t had the second baby. (She had the second baby.)
She wishes she hadn’t met her husband. (But she did meet her husband.)
She wishes she had married someone else. (But she didn’t marry someone else.)

Causative – (Műveltető)
There are many ways to do this in English. Let us look at the six most common, from most to
least aggressive. Attention: Sometimes we use causative with the verb’s infinitive form (to +
verb) and sometimes with the bare infinitive (verb without “to”).
* (sy) = somebody; (sg) = something

Causative with Infinitive Causative with Bare Infinitive

force (sy) to do (sg) make (sy) do (sg)
get (sy) to do (sg) have (sy) do (sg)
allow (sy) to do(sg) let (sy) do (sg)

Look at these examples:

I have to have them take their medicine. / I have them wash their teeth.
I have them get dressed. / I get them to stop screaming.

If it is not important who does the action, you can use another form of causative:
have / get (sg) done
e.g., “We couldn’t have his sprained ankle examined with the x-ray machine.”
In this case, there is no difference in meaning between have and get. We conjugate these
verbs as usual, then we use a verb in third form after the object.

Ex.: They needed to get his teeth cleaned. / When will you get the car washed?
 We had had the food delivered before the guests arrived.
Parents of Children wit Special Needs (interview)
Study Guide (Page 3 of 2)

Causative (continued)
Take a look at these forms with should and ought to. (Both mean kellene.)

We should have the room painted blue. We ought to have the room painted blue.
We should not have the room painted blue. We ought not to have the room painted blue.
We should have had the room painted blue. We ought to have had the room painted blue.
We should not have had the room painted blue. We ought not to have had the room painted blue.

Vocabulary
severe – serious, strong, intense; [punishment] strict or harsh / súlyos, komoly, rideg, kemény
kid – literally, a young goat; kid(s) → child (children)
colic – frequent, prolonged, or intense crying and fussiness in healthy babies
to babble – to talk quickly and happily in a way that is hard to understand
to twirl – to spin quickly or to make something spin
doubt [noun] – a feeling of uncertainty / kétség, bizonytalanság
overzealous – too enthusiastic, eager, or active / túl buzgó
screening – szűrés, szűrővizsgálat waitlist – várólista
compulsion – irresistible urge to behave a certain way vehicle – jármű
to insist – demand something forcefully
to be entitled – to have the legal right or just claim to something
observation – megfigyelés, észrevétel misconception – tévhit, tévképzet
within one’s means – affordable, one has the money to purchase or buy it
to inhibit – gátol (inhibited, uninhibited) miraculous – csodálatos
dietary supplement – táplálékkiegészítő indulgent – opposite of strict / engedékeny
to come in handy – to be useful, fortunate, or especially convenient (saving time and effort)
potty-trained – [children] able (already taught) to use the toilet by themselves
non-verbal – unable to speak or to communicate through speech
required – necessary, obligatory, requisite, mandatory / kell, kötelező
tip – piece of advice costly – expensive divorce - válás
assertive – confident, proactive, asserting one’s rights and needs without bullying others
principal – leader of a school, particularly an elementary school / igazgató
cooperation – action of working together toward a common goal / összeműködés
daunted – apprehensive, intimidated / megfélemlített (similar to discouraged – bátortalan)
setback – visszaesés, hanyatlás bruise – véraláfutás
boxer – ökölvívó abused child – bátalmazott gyerek
clueless – tanácstalan helpless – tehetetlen
side effect – mellékhatás anesthesia – érzéstelenítés
to restrain – deprive of motion or freedom / korlátoz
a tall order – a difficult request, a wish that is hard to fulfill
to deal with (sg) = to manage (sg) – kezel, foglálkozik

ASSIGNMENT
Write a short paragraph expressing your reaction to the interview. Did you learn anything
from it? Was there anything in it that shocked or surprised you, or were you familiar with the
situations described by the mother? Was there anything that you passionately agreed or
disagreed with? Did you prefer this interview to the article by Ellen Notbohm (“Ten Things
Every Child With Autism Wishes You Knew”)? Why or why not? Please write 5-6 sentences.