Hello Adonai, it’s me.

I have stopped talking to you not because of anything you did but because of the things I have
failed to do. It’s hard for me to apologize when I’m not sure what I did wrong. Why do you cast
me out? Why do you condemn me to this life of age and rebirth? Is it you that does this to me or
is it I that casts out my own image?
You upset me. You occupy my mind too much and I am often pained by your expression etched
into my skull. What did I do wrong? Why do you not love me like the others?
I am obsessed with you. Your image festers in my brain and I act only in the ways that I believe
you to want me to. Why? Why do I torment myself for you? Are you causing me to do this? Or
again, do I only manage to torment myself further? Walking alone in my shadows far away from
your holy light.
I saw a woman today. She appeared in my room. Her look was the same as yours when I call to
you. Voiceless and petrified at the monster in front of you. I try to comfort her, but I only make
myself disappear. I only seem to infect others.
Why did you make me? Why did you make me this way? You are my mother- my creator, my
lover and life giver. I just want to give you the same. I want to kiss your Earth, but you’ve
destined me to erode the paths you’ve created. You make me break down your image and rebirth
it. I should be proud of this and yet I cannot help to realize I am destroying you- or at least part
of you.
Please comfort me. I’m sorry I have spent so long trying to deny my purpose. I realize I’ve been
denying myself. I don’t know why I write you…you don’t respond.
Why don’t you love me like the others?
Yours forever,
Time