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How to Put God at the Center of Your

Relationship: 17 Ways
SEPTEMBER 29, 2021 BY CYRIL ABELLO  35 COMMENTS
Photo by Naassom Azevedo
Women are often told to look for men who love them more than they (these
girls) would ever love these guys back to make sure they won’t be cheated on.
However, isn’t this a bit unfair for men? I believe they deserve to be loved as
much as possible too.

Well, if you want a better assurance of a long-lasting relationship, I find this

advice better—find a person who loves God more than s/he would ever love
anyone else. Why? Because a person who loves God fears and obeys Him—
and that means s/he would do his/her best to be Christlike in handling any
relationship. Humility, honesty, faithfulness, patience, and so on would be
seen on him/her.

In my other blogs, I talked about how making a love triangle between God and
the couple as among the best ways to make a relationship lasts. Based on
what I have witnessed around me, I can really say that those relationships
which have God as their foundation are those that stay strong despite many
trials.

If you want to know how to put God at the center of your relationship, here are
17 ways that I hope can lead you both closer to Him and each other.

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How To Put God At The Center Of Your Relationship

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How To Put God At The Center Of Your Relationship:

17 Ways
1. Strengthen your personal relationship with God.
You cannot direct your relationship to the spiritual level if you have not
reached it personally yet. Before imposing this goal into the relationship,
strengthen your own faith and relationship with your Creator. He can only
work in your relationship if you let Him work in your first.

2. Love God first before your partner.

You may find this ridiculous because we are in the 21st century and you think
religion should just be 10% of your life. Well, let me assure you that God does
not require you to be religious so you can be closer to Him. He wants a father-
child relationship with you.

And let me remind you that He has every right to demand that He should be
first in your life because He created you—and for Himself (Colossians 1:16).
3. Fear the Lord.
If you are familiar with the story of Joseph the Dreamer, you would notice that
when he was tempted by the wife of Potiphar (his master) to sleep with her,
he refused her not because he feared her husband but because he did not
want to sin against God (Genesis 39).

If you love God, you would fear to do anything that displeases God—not
because He gets terribly angry but because you don’t want to hurt Him—and
that includes cheating on your partner.

4. Pray for each other.

They say that if you are praying for a person, you become spiritually attached
to him/her. Well, I believe it is true because if you keep on blessing your
partner in the spirit, you contribute to his/her well-being in the physical realm.
Making this a habit between you is also one way of supporting and helping
each other.

5. Pray together.
Surely, you are familiar with the saying: “A family that prays together stays
together”. If you have a plan to be a family someday, then starting a prayer
habit now is just healthy. Instead of bickering over problems, why don’t you
kneel down together and pray about them?

Photo by congerdesign
6. Church time before the date.
On Sundays, before you go on a date, make it a rule to go to church together
first. Also, if the time is limited and you have to choose between God-time and
babe-time, then I strongly encourage you to go for God-time. God honors
those who honor Him, so if He sees that you put Him first before your
relationship, then I believe He will bless you with more time for each other.

7. Study God’s Word together.

Personally, I find the Bible full of wisdom that can help us handle the different
areas of life, including relationships. If you are a Christian and you believe the
Bible as God-breathed scriptures, then I suggest that you take time to study it
as a couple. I encourage you to be part of a small group that discusses how
the Bible can be applied in life.

8. Ask God to help you change your bad attitudes.

A healthy relationship does not require you to change your personality—but it
motivates you to change bad attitudes. Aside from cheating, many broken
relationships are blamed on pride—one of the exes or both find it hard to
admit mistakes and apologize first. However, only God can help us change for
the better so ask Him to help you apply the Bible in your life.

Photo by BarbaraJackson
9. Help each other grow in your relationship with God.
If only one of you gives importance to the spiritual condition of your
relationship, then it will not be balanced and the ‘boat’ would sink on the side
of the unbelieving. Make it a goal as a couple to help each other grow in faith
especially when one of you is weak. Do not just remind each other to pray,
read the Bible, or go to church—but do them together.

10. Be reminded that your partner is fearfully and wonderfully made by

God.
At times when you are tempted to compare your partner to someone you think
to be better, or you wish s/he were someone else, please remember that the
same God who created you uniquely is the same God who created him/her as
well. Appreciate your partner as who s/he is because like you, s/he is loved
and special to the Lord.

11. Apply 1 Corinthians 13 in your relationship.

If you want a guide of how love should be, then read 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. To
give you a glimpse, this passage says that love is patient, kind, and not self-
seeking. You can use these verses as a checklist to see if true love exists in
your relationship.

12. Look for the counsel of spiritually-mature individuals.

Whenever your relationship is on the rocks, seek advice from God-fearing
people. They won’t only pray for you, but you can also get wisdom from them
on how you can maturely handle the situation. Avoid those whose
primary solution to problems is alcohol—it won’t solve anything.

13. Wait until marriage.

I am not being a hypocrite, old-fashioned, or judgmental here—trust me I
know what I am talking about. Doing that ‘thing’ which only married couples
should do leads to a lot of negative consequences. Aside from emotional
scars in case you break-up, unplanned pregnancies, and UTI (yes, s*x is one
of the culprits of urinary tract infection, and you can confirm this with
healthcare workers), this actually hinders God’s blessings in your relationship
—because even if it is already the 21st century, it is still a sin in His eyes.

14. Get married.

If you want to start your own family, then start right by getting married. Living-
in together may be the trend today, but if you acknowledge God, then you
won’t do it because it is not right without marriage. Again, this hinders
blessings into your relationship—or family.
If money is the problem, then please know that a wedding does not have to be
expensive. In case you can’t afford a church wedding in the meantime, then a
civil wedding will do. It is still honored by God since the authorized personnel
to conduct the ceremony has His anointing (Romans 13:1).

15. Serve God together.

Won’t it be fulfilling if you would serve God together? As an individual, God
has given you each spiritual gift and a specific calling. Support each other to
pursue your call and use your God-given talents to glorify Him.

16. Make it a relationship goal to help others.

The best way to serve God is by serving others. Your relationship would be
stronger if it has a purpose. Find out how you, as a couple, can bless others
who are in need—like supporting a charity or donating school supplies to kids.
Even though small things, you can already create a difference in society,
especially when you inspire other couples to do the same.

ALSO READ: 8 Ways to Truly Bless Your Relationship

17. Treat each other with grace—just like how Jesus treats you.
Putting God at the center of your relationship does not make you, your
partner, or your relationship perfect. However, it teaches you how to treat
imperfections with grace—which means not giving up on the relationship
easily just because of challenges. If you are hurt, forgive just like how God
forgives you and be willing to give second chances.

A Strong Foundation

Acknowledging God in your relationship does not guarantee a smooth and

easy journey as a couple. However, it makes you stronger in trials and more
patient with each other. It will also help you be wiser and braver in taking
steps to the future together.

Online Courses Recommended For You：

 Prophetic School And Hearing The Voice of God

This course is for any believer who is hungry for God’s power to flow
through them, bless, and minister to people.
 15 Essential Biblical Texts
15 key Biblical texts you can use to bring deeper meaning to your life for
anyone interested in creating a more meaningful life through Biblical
wisdom.
  The Resurrection of the Son of God
Study of the afterlife and the idea of resurrection.

Books Recommended For You:

A Little God Time for Couples: 365 Daily Devotions (Hardcover) – Perfect
Engagement, Wedding and Anniversary Gift for Couples

The Man God Has For You: 7 traits to Help You Determine Your Life Partner

Becoming the Woman God Wants Me to Be: A 90-Day Guide to Living the Proverbs
31 Life

Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make
Us Happy?
* As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.

ALSO READ:
 20 Signs God is at the Center of Your Relationship
 

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Cyril Abello

Cyril is a personal development blogger and content writer. She is also an online
language teacher. She has a degree in Communication Arts and loves everything about
writing. Being a full-time mom, she enjoys freelancing.
FILED UNDER: HAPPINESS & SPIRITUALITY , LOVE &
RELATIONSHIP

Reader Interactions
Comments

1. ISAAC HAPPINESS GEORGE says

October 5, 2021 at 8:42 pm

Thanks you so much . A relationship with out GOD and support his not sure
relationship .

Reply
2. Mike Ogana says

August 20, 2021 at 7:34 am

Forgive him and continue with your marriage

Reply

3. rensil says

December 15, 2020 at 5:49 pm

hi I am from Philippines I had some relationship with a Mexican man ..and he

is the son of God, was living on California im engaged already to him last 2
months… I need prayer from all are… God bless you all ….I was blessed a
lots ..

Reply

4. oluwasegun oluwatoyin says

October 31, 2020 at 10:03 pm

 Hi,Im in a relationship with someone who God has been calling but he’s
adamant because of worldly pleasures.His Pastor has testified to this and also
my spirit tells me often that God really wants him in the vineyard.He sings in
his church but not totally saved.i really want to be of help to him because I
know that serving God is fulfilling but I don’t know the way around it.please
kindly help me out.

Reply

5. Femi says

October 30, 2020 at 8:30 am

Good. This piece of message, gives light. Love to invite you to Nigeria one
day.

Reply

6. Gold says

October 19, 2020 at 9:06 pm

Wow
Thanks so much for the tips
God bless you ❤️
 Reply

7. Jon Christopher Ocana says

October 8, 2020 at 6:50 pm

I know God has led me to your blog, Right now my Christian girlfriend had a
fight and we’ve been struggling because of our differences. Thank you for this
I was enlightened on how should I respond on the things that we’re facing
now.

Reply

8. Mansa says

September 2, 2020 at 12:10 pm

Hi
An article so inspirational and well written requires sincere appreciations.
While we have not done the ‘thing’ and plan to wait till marriage, but we have
‘felt’ each other. Would the god be still angry with us. Please guide.

Thanks

Reply
o Rachel says

March 25, 2021 at 6:57 am

mansa you’ve done well by coming plain. God can forgive you both if you repent
of it, and be intentional about setting boundaries that would not further tempt you.
God bless you.
💜

Reply

9. Harriet says

July 10, 2020 at 6:19 am

Iam really blessed. May God continue using you. I need advice, I discovered
my husband is cheating on me with another lady and even they have got a
child. What should I do?

Reply

10. Isaac zack says

 March 17, 2020 at 11:48 pm

I have been helped Thank you so much

Reply

11. Lisa says

February 23, 2020 at 5:21 pm

Hi am Lisa …am seeking the face of God in my relationship…I believe all isn’t
lost …God is in control…it’s painful but am trusting God

Reply

12. adefila busayo says

February 5, 2020 at 3:35 pm

Thanks you,you thought me alot.

Reply
13. David Norriss says

January 24, 2020 at 8:55 pm

I love how you made the connection that if you want your relationship to be
centered around God then you need to have a strong personal relationship
with Him first. I feel like a lot of people want to skip this step and go straight
into trying to work with their partner and their relationship together with God. If
people skip the first step then they will never truly be able to have a strong
relationship with their partner and God at the same time.

Reply

14. Rae says

January 18, 2020 at 4:59 pm

This post has been so helpful!

Reply

15. Olamide says
January 16, 2020 at 10:37 am

Calvary greetings,

presently, i inquire for mentorship, a friend of mine (guy) proposed marriage to

me which i consented hence i decided to share this with my Mum seeking that
she prays along with me cos I came from a broken marriage which i don’t
want to have such and i related with my Pastor but my Pastor asked me to go
and pray about it and return when i am fully convince that He (Friend) is the
rightful person for me.

Meanwhile, my Friend (Lover) took me to his Mum which I was welcomed with
much love and when he came fellowshipping at my Church and i decided to
introduce him to my Pastor, of course my Pastor counselled him but right in
the Church, my Mum was crossed at me for inviting him to our Church (that i
am making myself too cheap for him and I should allow the Church to follow
the rightful channels). Later in the evening, i went on a outing with my friend
(my lover) and on my return my Mum reported me to her Sister who told me i
can’t marry someone without a good job and gave me list of people i should
marry. in fact my Mum said to me that night that I have no salvation and her
knowing that I have once visited the guys family she was upset with me.

I told a family friend about him whom i live with during the week days about
him(my lover) and gave him a warm reception on his visit to an extent that my
lover and family friend planned to surprise me about his visit one day which he
spent the night there with us.

Lastnight, he told me that he wanted to kiss my mouth and why i didn’t hug
him when i saw him at the surprise given at my family house and my response
was “the moment we start kissing or hugging its calls in for other immoral
things which might not glorify God and which our relationship is still very
young”

The Guy concerned resigned from a job which is pay was small and ventured
into Business Development which will kick off soon, intend doing other
business alongside but nailed it that he doesn’t want to be an employee.
Although, he is still living presently at his parent’s house.

Please advice me on the above story

1. Is it rightful for me to support him in securing an accommodation financially
 when still dating?
2. Is it rightful to keep visiting him at his Parent’s house since my Mum hasn’t
permitted him visiting at our house?
3. Is it rightful for him to keep visiting me at my family fiends house?
4.In a godly relationship, is it rightful to be pecked, kissing on the mouth and
hugging?
5. What measure can be taken to avoid kissing, hugging if its not rightful?
6. How can i pave way for a relationship leading to marriage that will glorify
God and Humanity?

Thanks in anticipation of your response.

Reply

16. PAMSY says

January 6, 2020 at 11:57 am

Hi am in a confuse state now my pastor just told me and my boyfriend to

break up and do things the right way we love each other and we are willing to
do things to keep the relationship but the pastor said in order For our Plans in
life to came to past we need to break up…We are thinking of dating without
sex if at all that’s a good idea

Reply

o Martin says
 April 21, 2020 at 9:09 am

Hi, I think if one you is a christian and the other isn’t then that is a very valid
reason to break up. If that’s the case, I suggest listening to your pastor. If not, I
think keep going, but try to not have “make this relationship work no matter what”
attitude. That is for marriage, not dating. In dating, I think you must find out if this
is Gods will, and if you are compatible with each other. If yes, get married
someday. If no, you two need to talk.

God Bless You

Martin

Reply

17. Noah Brewster says

December 28, 2019 at 4:07 pm

Truly amazing and informative. Thank you

Reply

18. Prudience Novela says

November 16, 2019 at 10:52 am

 Hi I’m Bongani Makhubele I’m in a relationship with my future wife and we
always fight when we have an agreement it ends up with a fight , please help
us to get rid of it.

Reply

19. Glory says

November 7, 2019 at 11:28 pm

I am Glory.
I am very sad right now, my boyfriend has been cheating on me and treating
me badly for over 2years now. We had a fight now and i am broken.
I want to make this relationship work, i just need God to show me how.
I am inlove with him and he has said he will like to spend the rest of his life
with me. Please i need God right now. I need him in my relationship. I really
want to spend the rest of my life with him!

Reply

20. Osas says

October 14, 2019 at 2:12 pm

In a relationship with a guy who loves me so much and I took his love for
granted
I made him feel not wanted and whenever we have any argument the first
 thing is to tell him that it’s over between us and he will come begging and I will
forgive him. It kept happening I didn’t know I was slowly pushing him aside
and now he doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore and I have realized
my mistakes and I wanna make it right with him.i know he is not perfect and m
not also but I don’t know what to do anymore. I really love and want him back

Reply

21. Seini says

October 13, 2019 at 11:32 am

I just want to write and say THANK YOU. Thank you for reminding me what I
had forgotten. Thank you for reminding me how to bring God back as the
centre and foundation of my marriage and family. God bless.

Reply

22. Juju Gabriel says

August 11, 2019 at 8:36 pm

hello.
well, since you acknowledged the wrong. And since you want to change, God
will surely forgive you. just bow down and pray, first acknowledge what you
did wrong, by doing so you break free from the devil’s chain. Then ask for
forgiveness . If you really mean it, God will surely Forgive. You just have to
 agree with yourself to not do it again until married and only with your
wife/husband.

Reply

23. Molowski says

June 25, 2019 at 9:06 pm

I’m dating and we go to separate churches

One of the problems is that we already committed adultery.
What can I do in this regard I really I want to change and save God.

Reply

o Juliet Siaw says

December 30, 2019 at 10:56 am

Both of you should prayer you should pray to your father in heaven for
forgiveness, as his words says for all have sinned and fall short in the Glory of
God (Romans 3:23) but if we confess our sins to him he is faithful and just to
forgive us our sins (1John 1:9). And please never go back to it after praying, just
have faith that your prayers are heard and from now onwards you will leave a
Godly life. God bless you
 Reply

24. Pearl says

June 24, 2019 at 3:31 pm

Hello Im Pearl,
Im in a relationship with my first cousin. I know the catholic church doesnt
allow marriage upto the 3rd degree. We’ve had many ups amd downs but
we’ve always been together. I have never received such love and affection
from anyone as much i have got from him. Deep down i know this relation is
wrong but when i think of the love and respect he has given me it becomes
difficult for me to go away from him. I somehow reached this site and hope to
receive some guidance. Please…

Reply

o michael scholes says

October 2, 2019 at 12:24 pm

Hope this site is truly powerful and fulfilment of our Higher Worth to learn for
Forgiveness, Surrender and Strengths like never before imagined. Together my
friends, we got this 😉 No Worries, Doubts or Resentments.

Reply
o michael says

July 22, 2020 at 11:55 am

i will suggest that you read leviticus 18. Also, if his parents are directly related to
your parents (uncle or aunt), then it is advisable to break the bond.
,

Reply

25. Daniel Lopez says

May 21, 2019 at 2:24 am

Hello my name is Daniel Lopez I proposed my girlfriend on a Day of God’s

resurrection and my parents are trying to separate us for no reason and well I
love her a lot… but I need to pray for some reason I don’t want to anymore
and I can’t understand the Bible well

Reply

o Elijah says
 June 10, 2019 at 2:29 pm

Hey Daniel!
I’m not sure where you are spiritually but if you truly have a relationship with God
he will show you what to do in this situation. Only if you surrender your
relationship with your girlfriend first. If you aren’t willing to give this completely to
God first, you’re on the wrong track. That being said God gave us instructions in
his word on what to do as far as marriage. In your case I would read what 1st
Corinthians 7:36-40, I believe in these verses that it’s not wrong for a father to
withhold his daughter from marriage. If your girlfriend’s dad does not approve of
your marriage, that could be God protection on both of you. In your case you said
(your parents) are not on board with your relationship. In Ephesians it says we
should honor our father and mother and if this is not horrible to them, it might be
wise to not go through with the marriage. God could see danger in your future
where he is using your parents to stop you from going forward. In the end it’s up to
you to seek God and see what he says in his word, to do the right thing. Hopefully
this will help you brother! I’ll keep you in prayer!

Reply

 Aso says

September 30, 2019 at 2:44 pm

What if we (both couples) pray to God to bless them and made them there future
couples?

Reply
o James says

November 27, 2020 at 1:15 pm

I understand what you’re saying I do not understand the Bible I have tried very
hard but it’s written like poetry and only words get God to can understand I went to
a couple of classes it was an adult learning of the Bible the guy asked for people
to raise their hands but they had an equations any questions two or three of them
raise their hands and their main question was I do not understand the Bible Bible
so I read my daily devotional on my phone and I look for topics on my phone I
Google it so don’t fill out a place or misunderstood the Bible is written to me in
poetry he says one thing but it means another so I don’t get it my mind does not
work that way if you ask for a ranch I’ll hand you a wrench I won’t hand you a
sheep and you have to interpret every sentence and every line I don’t get it I’m
sorry so I understand what you’re saying totally don’t be down yourself at all
there’s many people like you I’m one of them God bless you

Reply

26. Shasmecka Levels says

March 27, 2019 at 9:46 pm

Thank you so much. Im glad i came across your blog. Im truly inspiried what
God has done in your life and i am starting out on my inspirational blog. Thank
you again and God bless. Continue doing this..

Reply
o Mathew says

November 30, 2020 at 3:21 am

True
Cause this is perfectly explained. I have learnt and noted the most important
things in my relationship.

Reply

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