Concordia Cum

Veritate
University of the
Common Man
3000 Carpe Noctem Ave.
Invictus, NH 01313

Staff Meeting: Opening Remarks

Fellows, Professors and Noble Staffers, lend us your ears. First, let me
welcome you all back from the fruitful pursuits of your summer. You are
collectively the finest chalice of knowledge which has ever brimmed over
this blessed land, and you will be greeted by a dynamic student corps in
true Common fashion in these coming late summer weeks.
The immensely expensive and terminally delayed improvements to
Technology Hall, however will not greet you. Due to a breach of
contract, and subsequent lawsuit we have engaged a new architect and
technology contractor for the re-designed hall. What this means is that
you will be returning to what you do best: Under the shaded elms
on the south tip of campus, your familiar, burnished hemlock lecterns
await you. As they still know the grip and timbre of past orators, so too,
do we expect you to renew your delivery mechanisms during a semester
which, not unlike the great political theaters of ancient Rome, will
resound with the voice of knowledge from the clenched throat of reason
and shall be accompanied by the laurels of past great thought.
Gone are the petty conveniences of PowerPoint, laser point and pre-
taped lectures. Gone are the microphones, amplifiers and acoustic

Cc Faculty/Staff
 Concordia Cum
Veritate
University of the
Common Man
dampers. Greet these temporary forums with the grit and tenacity of the
Roman Legion; temper your style under the direction of Archimedes,
Pythagoras and mighty Socrates.
We anticipate an eight week delay, and ask this of you,
and no more…Velle est Posse!

Cc Faculty/Staff