I have often wondered why there exists no document in such a huge organization, which caters to those masses of people

who would like to leave the organization gracefully. In my frantic search I looked everywhere, kept no stones unturned, and search the whole organization for a document which would help and assist the employees in the Art of Leaving But to my utter dismay I found that neither the Gyanmandir nor the Computers connected to the Nnoc or Reliance for that matter contained any Document of the above stated relevance . Hence I Ajay Raghav a GET who miraculously survived for nearly one and half months in this life taking ordeal here at reliance took the vow of respecting humanity and human values . Hence here I am chipping down one of the sweetest documents ever recorded. If any one can please host it in the gyanmandir too . The journey begins one day before at your night bed thinking about the reason you would give for your boss why you want to leave. Even though the next morning you may be up and running and still wouldnt have found a valid reason, there are is no room for thinking more on it . Its time to say good bye . Hence I would be telling you in a sequence of events as how is the Art of leaving performed. The below document is written to inspire people to continue working cos in the course you are done reading this doc file you would know how difficult it is to leave hence its always better to stay and not leave . Hence its an inspiring doc to stay . JOB #1 FACING THE TIGER your immediate boss Anyone who has faced the tiger would know how difficult it is , Well the whole quitting process starts by facing the tiger himself . The tiger may pounce on you once you state your reason cos he is always hungry. He thinks that you have taken away the sentence from him which he wanted to say for his entire lifetime here in reliance . Anyways the tiger will pounce and will make you good dead meat. So I have concluded that its always good to say Higher studies as the best reason for us to Quit. But hey dont give me a raised eye if you are 52 years old and your boss dint buy the reason. To leave you should have some brains ,but to stick here I understand you neednt need any . So after you put the paper your tiger will become a pussycat and would meow in his own respect. Would say big big sentences like you are making a big mistake this is not the right option etc etc . I would recommend you to stand like the great wall of china and stick by your decision , bring out the warrior in you and stand your ground . A suggestion , Please watch the movie in Gyanmandir The gladiator in the previous night shift , It boosts your confidence and would help you to stand your ground . The line inspired me to hell in the movie What ever comes out of these gates ( ur bosses mouth )we stand a better chance if we stay together and stand together Anyways not more in to the movie . Atlast when the tiger comes to know that you are daunted and firmfooted enough to leave he would say meet the lion and go .

JOB # 2 FACING THE LION (shift head ) Unlike the tiger the lion is not that much of a hurdle .Its easy to jump over the lion . The lion famous for its whiskers has one of the sweetest smiles in the jungle ( NNOC ) . The lion would just smile and would say I thought you would stay in the jungle for more time to come Well the only option is smile back and give bad words in your heart cos he has every reason to stay . Common why wont he ?? he is earning ten times the Money what you are earning . So try to be calm and composed and give a big smile to him . So for this jesture I would recommend you to watch Passion of the Christ a night earlier . Now dont blame me that you have to do so much work the night before quitting .no I wont buy that common at least do your duty perfectly one day before your tenure ends . . Hence moto in jobn number 2 is FAIR AT FACE FOUL AT HEART HEHE WAS A GOOD ONE WASNT IT ?? The lion would then sign on your resignation letter Recommended and would send it to the lioness JOB# 3 FACING THE LIONESS (NNOC HEAD ): Every big shot has a personal secretary so does our lioness . Our lioness has the best secretary Mr mouse ( nolan ) I used to wonder why this guy was appointed in reliance just because he has a name which had Information technology embedded in it ?? Cos common how many people have their names NO LAN. Anyways he is one more fresh face which you would see during leaving reliance no doubt , he first congratulates you for the decision which you have taken after painfully watching 2 movies and staying up all nite . And would ask some questions given below : 1. Why are you leaving ?? 2. Are they giving much better pay ( he would ask this even if you say higher studies cos the damn guy knows the truth ) 3. How much are they giving ?? 4. Is it good atmosphere ?? ( how do I know I am gonna join there ) 5. Can you put my resume there too ?? hehehe kidding he would say something similar to this his dialogue would be pick me from the drain when you reach high He would then go to the lioness and thelioness would read the letter take his might claw ( his pen ) the blue one screw it open and then sign on it telling Approved relieve him as per company Norms would turn and give you a glance from his cave and would resume his job . Mr mouse would take the Xerox of the same letter and would write on the cover one of those famous lines which you would only see in a james bond movie . It would say strictly confidential.He would then stick a cello tape which is kept in the second drawer below the book the daily bread. No my apprehensions were clear , even he the personal secretary to the lioness was praying for his daily bread . No wonder everyone

wants to run out of this orgnz who pray to the lord for their daily bread . After that you are trace routed to the MANAV SEVA department also known as HR . JOB#4 PROCESS STARTS @ Manav seva dept : Needless to say the manav seva is hari seva , cos they dont do this well in the first place . Good to see one happy go lucky man Rahul shetye there who is very accommodating for what ever decisions you take . He would have a big smile at his face too and would accept the resignation letter . Beware Mr rajesh dixit runs away at 2pm hence if your letter is addressed to him meet him before 2 pm . Dont meet mangesh bidaye he is pissed 24/7 . So For all procedures I would recommend meeting Mr rahul shetye . The list contains in total 31 signatures . After duly filling up the form which contains information about your personal and official things . You are supposed to take a psychometric test. Now I dint know to leave you have to give such a exam . And there is this 4 page questionnaire that how do you find reliance and what are the factors that you find in reliance displeasing. I wanted to tick all of them displeasing but I was very happy by the cleaners in reliance they do an amazing job hence I opted for a suggestion of raise to all employees. Then I thought this humility is due to yesterdays passion of Christ movie which I saw hence its nor the real me hence I reverted my decision . So after you fill up the forms you first run to the following people . JOB #5 RUN TOWARDS ANNA & OTHERS 1. Ever wondered why all accountants are south Indians .Yes mr neelkandan who sits in C block first floor towards the right , there sits mr anna who has the peculiar hindi . He would gracefully sign the document and would say itnaaaaa jaldiiii bore ho gaya tum . Ask him for your PF and other details he would say I would look in to the matter and report the HR. He would give you 8 signatures and woul leave the ESS- advance settled column blank . That job is done . 2. Then as per the letter you go to Mr suhas kulkarni . He wont be there I bet I tried six times . He sits in B block Ground floor wing no 6 . His extension is 80393. When I reached there it contained a printout on his desk advicing us to meet the lady behind the pillar . Well raise your chin tilt your head you to angel 30degrees you will find the second pillar . go there then aparna or archna will sign for Mr suhas kukarni.. So PHM cards and other things are cleared After that sign . 3. Then you walk up to the opposite wings of the B ground floor towards Christopher david . He is a moody guy but is found stuck in his seat all the time . The hottest spot in DAKC would be his seat I guess . So he will give you 5 signatures then and there including the library . 4. After mr Christopher you go to nagesh gadiyar thats what the form says , But beware never go to Mr nagesh gadiyar he doesnt sign it anymore . moreover it says that he sits in D ground floor but he has shifted to B ground floor . Go straight from the hdfc bank In b block you would find Nagesh gadiyar . He will

say get it signed from Mr chechlani . Beware again dont go to chechlani there is a cold war between Mr gadiyaaal oooops Gadiyar and chechlani , so while you ponder where to go , there comes this small lukka chap who is the pa for dinesh pandit . Now he says get it signed from Mr Mahesh . So go early in the morning to get the signature from Mr Mahesh , cos he leaves at 10:45 in the morning . No dont get me wrong he doesnt have a night shift like you but he comes @ 10:30 and leaves @ 10:45 .so obviously he will be pissed that you gave him work for 15 minutes during which he is suppose to take a break . He will grudge and say kal aaaao . But remember the gladiator line and stay firmfooted you will earn a very valuable food coupon sign . 5. Just opposite to him you have Mr dinesh Pandit who is punctual and would give you the signature . no issues with him .B gr floor ext 80156. MEET THE IT ASSIST : Dont be over enthusisastic and approach these guys early, if you do you will lose the liberty of writing another sweetest mail in reliance that is your good bye mail .so go to the IT assist people only on your last day of job .The IT assist people sit in D ground floor ,74646. So is the case of Neeti rao too . Neeti Rao sits in J block 2nd floor and her extension is 87629. she looks after time office . SECURITY Strangely this doesnt have to do anything with the security guys you id card has to be submitted to the hr thats all when you are gonna take the walk for the last time , hey I prefer take the golf cart . Now this is funny , I know reliance has a petrol industry but why the hell you have to get the signature from the petroleum authorities , I dunno why , you walk all the way to the petrol pump meet mr indrajit thakur the one towards your left from the door and then get his signature . Well by the time you walk up to there you would get tired and will search for water .There is a water cooler in the pump but I dint know how to use it there is no tap to the cooler . I thought that is state of the art design too . hence left thirsty . But there ends the signature part of the Art of leaving . Then all you do is to wait till you submit the document . And wait for the clock to strike the time you are supposed to leave the jungle .

As for me the time arrived after desperately seeing my watch for all the time . Strange voices echoed in my head , I thought those are still the movie lines which have become a hangover , but charismatically there were some sweet lines too,then I turned and saw angelic beauty , I bet she was the one who fell down from heaven last nite . I walked up to her and said so you in reliance and she said no I just left today , .I said me tooo . And asked her the one big question . If I follow you home would you keep me ?? She did and rest is art of ____ which I am not suppose to list down . Censored . So thats it guys If you have any doubts on the procedure dont ever call me I am already pisssed by it . Every man for himself in this battle city . Damn should have never watched the Movie Gladiator .

Diary of Ajay Raghav . GET did timepass in reliance from 14th February( relianc ewas my valentine how sick ) to 11 th april2005.