MEETING A NEW DOG

BONDING WITH YOUR DOG CREATING

How to Gain a Dog's Trust
Co-authored by Sheri Williams
Last Updated: August 13, 2020 References

Dogs communicate differently than people, so if

you want to gain their trust, you need to speak
their language! If you’re not used to being
around dogs, don’t worry. Even if you have very
little experience with them, learning how to get a
dog to trust you is easy, as long as you’re
patient with them. By using the right approaches
and spending time with them, you can build a
loving and trusting relationship with your furry
friend.

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Method 1 of 4:
Meeting a New Dog

Avoid making direct eye contact with

1 a dog you don’t know. Direct eye
contact can be seen as aggressive or
threatening behavior to a dog, so don’t stare
directly at a dog that you’re meeting. Use
your peripheral vision and make occasional
glances at the dog instead of locking eyes
with them to help them feel like they can trust
you.[1]

Direct eye contact can really frighten

sensitive dogs or dogs who may have
experienced abuse in the past.
If it helps, try looking at the dog’s back or
neck instead of their eyes.
Take a quick glance at the dog’s eyes to
see if they appear glassy, which can be a
sign that they feel threatened, stressed,
or scared.[2]

Approach the dog calmly and at an

2 angle. Walk toward a dog that you’re
meeting by making an arc so you approach
from an angle instead of directly in front of
them, which can make them nervous or feel
threatened. Project calm and relaxed energy
and don’t make any sudden or wild
movements so you don’t freak them out.[3]

Never approach a dog you don’t know

from behind either. You could frighten
them or make them feel threatened.
Pay attention to the dog’s body language
as well, such as having their tail tucked
between their legs, or if their body seems
stiff, which can be a sign that they’re
nervous or scared.[4]
Acting excited can make the dog excited
and lead to an aggressive greeting, like
jumping up on you or barking at you. This
can also trigger the dog’s fight or flight
instinct, as a stranger approaching the
dog with high energy can feel like a
threat to the dog.[5]

Stop about 10 feet (3.0 m) away and

3 allow the dog to come to you. As you
walk toward a dog that you’re meeting, stop
and stand still a little ways away from them.
Wait for them to choose to approach you so
they feel more comfortable. Stay calm and
relax to show the dog you can be trusted.[6]

Walking directly up to a dog you don’t

know can frighten them.
Try smiling and saying hello in a friendly
tone to make the dog feel safe.

Kneel down to get on their level when

4 they approach you. If the dog does
choose to walk over to you, kneel or squat
down so you’re closer to their level to show
them that you’re friendly. If the dog backs
away when you lower down, stay calm and
wait patiently for them to decide if they want
to approach you again.[7]

It’s not uncommon for a dog to be super

hesitant or not want to approach you at
all. If that’s the case, don’t force it. Be
friendly and calm and eventually they
may warm up to you.

Greet and pet the dog to show them

5 you’re friendly. If the dog trusts you
enough to approach you, give them some
love! Pat their head and rub their ears. Ask
them who’s a good boy or girl and scratch
their back. Dogs love to be loved, so say
sweet things and pet them to make them
happy, which will help get them to trust you.[8]

If a dog suddenly gets uncomfortable or

backs away, don’t chase after them. Be
patient and wait for them to come back to
you, especially if you’re meeting them for
the first time.
You could also give the dog a tasty treat
when you greet them to help them trust
you.

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Method 2 of 4:
Bonding with Your Dog

Go for a daily walk to bond with your

1 dog and let them explore. Dogs are
active animals and love to go for walks, so try
to take them out at least once a day for 20-30
minutes. Let your dog use the bathroom, sniff
all the smells, and feel like they’re safe with
you.[9]

Some dogs may be frightened by traffic

or other dogs, so avoid putting them in
stressful situations as much as possible.

Spend at least 15-20 minutes a day

2 playing with your dog. Spend time
playing with your dog to foster a healthy and
positive relationship.[10] Throw a tennis ball
around to play fetch or get some toys
designed to be safe for dogs. Spend 15-20
minutes playing with your dog every day so
they have fun and learn they can trust you.

Look for dog toys at your local pet shop

or by ordering them online.
If there’s a pet store in your area that
allows dogs inside, bring your dog and let
them pick out their own toy!

Reward good behavior to build a

3 loving relationship. Reinforce good
behavior with lots of love and positivity. Give
your dog a treat whenever they do something
right or listen to you. Pet your dog often to
show them you love them, and if they roll
over to ask for belly rubs, give them a good
scratching! Modify your dog’s behavior and
earn their trust by rewarding their good
behavior, especially if they have aggression
issues.[11]

If a dog exposes their belly to you for

rubs, it’s a sign that they really love and
trust you.

Cuddle with your dog so they feel safe

4 with you. Try curling up for a nice nap
with your dog on the sofa, or just hang out in
bed. Let them get comfortable being around
you and enjoy spending time with you.[12]

Dogs love to nap and relax, especially

when they feel safe and comfortable.

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Method 3 of 4:
Creating a Positive Environment

Establish a daily routine to help your

1 dog feel more comfortable. Dogs,
especially younger dogs and puppies, love
consistency and routine.[13] Establish a set
feeding time so your dog learns to trust when
you’ll give them food. Try to go for walks and
let them outside at the same times each day
so your dog knows they can depend on you.

You may be surprised at how much your

dog notices your daily routine and habits.
Try to incorporate a routine for your dog
into your daily schedule so they feel like
they can rely on you.
Setting routines can also help tell you if
something is bothering your dog. For
instance, if your dog doesn’t seem to be
interested in food when their normal
feeding time comes around, they could
be sick or scared about something.

Avoid yelling at your dog when they

2 misbehave. Dogs can sense your
emotions and if you get angry at them, they
could get scared or feel like they can’t trust
you. Even if your dog does something bad,
such as using the bathroom in the house or
chewing up the sofa, try not to raise your
voice at them. You can correct their behavior
without shouting at them, and they’ll learn
they can trust you, even when you’re not
happy with something they did.[14]

For instance, if your dog uses the

bathroom in the house, try firmly telling
them, “No!” and then bring them outside
so they learn that they need to do their
business outside.
Though there is debate surrounding the
use of force to train dogs, behavioral
experts argue that using forceful
punishment can frighten and traumatize
your dog.[15]

Pay attention to what your dog likes

3 and dislikes. Watch what food your dog
likes to eat or what toys they like to play with.
Give them what they really want so they see
you as a source of good things and want to
be around you. If there’s something your dog
doesn’t like, try to keep it away from them so
they enjoy their environment.[16]

For instance, if your dog doesn’t like

being pat on their head, then don’t pat
them there! Or if they don’t like loud
noises, try to keep your home quieter.
Pay attention to the food your dog seems
to enjoy as well as the food they don’t
seem to like so you can give them what
they want.

Set up an area for your dog to sleep

4 and relax in. Choose area out of the
way such as in the corner of a room or a
closet to use as a sort of “den” for your dog.
Place a dog bed and some toys in the area
so your dog has a nice comfy spot to relax,
unwind, and sleep.[17]

Dogs naturally like to curl up in a safe

area when they sleep, so you can create
one for them to use.

Ask family members to feed your dog

5 if it's a rescue to help socialize it. If
you have a rescue dog, have other people
who live with you feed them as well so they
learn to bond and trust with everyone in the
home. Make your dog feel like they live in a
happy place by associating everyone in the
home with yummy food.[18]

For instance, if you live with children,

have them feed your dog every other day
or so.
If you normally feed your dog, they may
only learn to trust you.

Play music and provide toys when

6 you leave so the dog isn't lonely. Dogs
don’t like to be left alone and be experience
separation anxiety, especially if they’re
rescues. Put on some music or the TV and
make sure your dog is set up with plenty of
toys to play with whenever you leave the
house so they aren’t lonely.[19]

Dogs can also get bored, too. Keeping

your dog occupied can help keep them
out of trouble, such as digging in the
trash can.

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Method 4 of 4:
Training Your Dog

Create a stronger bond by training

1 your dog 1-2 times a week. Develop
and build a bond with your dog by training
them for obedience or to do tricks.[20] Work
with your dog for at least 15 minutes a couple
of times a week to build a stronger and more
trusting relationship.

You don’t have to do anything fancy, just

head out in your backyard, go to a
nearby field, or even use your living room
to work on a trick or a command.
Training your dog isn’t just about getting
them to behave. If your dog knows what
you’re trying to communicate, they’ll trust
you more.
If you plan to take them a dog park or an
obedience course, it’s important that you
establish trust between you and your dog
before you enroll him in any professional
training, as this will allow him to interact
with other trainers and other dogs
confidently and without fear.[21]

Call your dog to you and reward them

2 to teach them to come. Stand still in a
spot and call your dog’s name or say
something like, “Come” or “Here.” When your
dog comes to you, give them a treat or lots of
love as a reward. Keep practicing the come
command and over time your dog will learn to
listen to you even without getting a treat as a
reward.[22]

Make training a fun game for your dog.

Keep a positive attitude so your dog
doesn’t feel stressed out.

Teach your dog to heel so they can go

3 on walks safely. The heel command
calls your dog to your side while you’re out on
a walk by having them walk at your side.
Walk around your home or backyard, call
your dog’s name, and point to the side you
want them to walk on. When they listen to
you, give them a treat as a reward. With
enough practice, your dog will be able to heel
on real walks and without a reward.[23]

The heel command is really useful,

especially when you’re out walking your
dog near high-traffic areas.

Give a treat and say “Speak” when

4 they bark to teach the speak trick. If
you want to teach your dog to speak, wait
until you catch them barking and give them a
treat. When you give them a treat, say
“Speak” so they associate the reward and
command with a bark. With some practice,
your dog will learn to bark whenever you give
the command.[24]

If your dog trusts you, they’ll be eager to

please you. Working on fun tricks
together is a great way to strengthen
your bond and build trust.
Teach your dog a bunch of commands
and tricks to spend time together and
build a strong, trusting relationship with
them.
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Community Q&A

Question

How long does it take for a new dog to

adjust to a new home?

Pippa Elliott, MRCVS

Veterinarian
Expert Answer

This depends on the dog's character and

their previous experiences. Some seem to
settle in days, whereas for others, it's
weeks. Help things along by restricting
access to the whole house, and have the
dog live in 2 or 3 rooms only. This way, he
becomes familiar with those few rooms
which builds his confidence and helps him
feel at home more quickly.
Helpful 5 Not Helpful 0

Question

How do I make my new dog feel at home?

Pippa Elliott, MRCVS

Veterinarian
Expert Answer

Try and stick with the routine for feeding

and walking that the dog was previously
used to. It's good to limit him to just 2 or 3
rooms at first, so he becomes familiar with
these. Letting him run around the whole
house can be intimidating or unsettling,