CHAPTER ONE

I too had my dreams and fantasies like every other young

girl out there. Aside from my career dream which was a big
life pursuit for me, there were other things I craved for.
I had this deep desire within me that I wasn’t not able to
explain why, how, and what spurred it up. Some folks said
it was a natural desire and absolutely normal. My biology
teacher also taught us that such desires are normal and a
feeling that every young person must experience.
I was in my adolescent stage; a stage when some things
aren't supposed to matter to me but surprisingly, those were
the things that occupied my mind.
I never really cared about my natural endowment but
somehow, I began to notice the tiny waist, big hips, and the
full breast that I'm endowed with. This discovery always
dragged me to the mirror; I just couldn't stop admiring the
curvy lady that I've grew into.
I began to take special care of myself, maybe not for myself
but for some guy out there because my instinct always told
me that there was someone out there admiring me. I mean,
I had everything guys yearn for in a woman.
On a beautiful Sunday morning, my parents and siblings
dressed beautifully for church service and because they
can't leave without me, they all sat in the sitting room,
waiting for me to join them.
I didn't wake up on time and so, I wasn't able to finish at
the same time as them. Although that wasn't the only
reason I finished late. I was a pretty girl and you know, I
had to look super beautiful to church, who knows, someone
might be looking.
I had already taken my bath and worn a beautiful pink short
gown that brought out my contours but that wasn't enough,
my face needed to glow some more.
I was still applying the new brown powder I bought from
the supermarket down the road when my mum hurriedly
opened my door and just like every other African mother,
she shouted at me at the top of her voice.
Amongst every other thing she said, her question, "Why are
you taking ages to dress up as though you kept a husband
who will admire you on the way", cracked me up.
Well, her shouting didn't stop me from looking in the
mirror one last time before zooming off, and of course, I
didn't answer her numerous questions.
Sitting in the back seat of my father's car, I began to
wonder how my mum knew that I dressed so fine with the
hope that some guy might be admiring me. I've heard
people say that mothers are mind readers but thought it was
just a theory until that day.
When we arrived at the church premises, I stylishly stepped
down from the car and adjusted my neat, beautiful, and
skimpy gown. I didn't want to lose the chances of being
attracted to a cool guy.
Don't even ask me if I came to church to worship. My
mission was simple and clear. My dress sense said it all; I
dressed to attract a guy for myself.
Do you want to know why? I will gladly let you know.
I just wanted to love and be loved. You might think I was
too young to desire love and affection but I deeply craved a
man in my life. One who would whisper sweet words to my
ears, one who will wrap his hands around me while telling
me how great I make him feel.
Don't blame me already, I wasn’t the only one in this
corner. Some of my friends were already enjoying what I
wished to enjoy. They had their prince charming and they
always filled my ears with stories of how affectionate they
have been with their boyfriends.
As they talked, I could feel the happiness in their hearts and
that made my desire to have mine stronger. It made me
believe that love is a beautiful thing to experience.
I wanted to experience and enjoy what my friends were
enjoying. Knowing what it feels like to be loved by the
opposite sex was what my heart longed for.

Truly, love from the opposite sex is a beautiful thing and

everyone should experience it but it's best enjoyed at the
appropriate time.
Do not awaken love until it so desires.
There's nothing wrong with having the urge to love and to
be loved but you must learn to apply self-control.
Abide by godly principles, they will help to tame fleshly
desires that will erupt from time to time. Focus on fulfilling
your destiny and cultivating a concrete relationship with
God
CHAPTER TWO
The urge to have a lover already engulfed me, so much that
I made up my mind to join the trend and be happy like my
friends.
My experience at our graduation party wasn't one that I
would wish to experience ever again. Every one of my
friends invited their boyfriends to the party except me and
they made fun of me for that. They mocked me real hard
that I regretted ever coming to the party.
I was a curvy girl with brains, my figure eight was enough
to make guys go nuts. I was better than my friends both in
beauty and intellect but they made a mockery of me
because I don't have a boyfriend.
While I was licking my wounds, I heard one of them call
me junior babe. The other said I was naive because I told
them that I wasn't in any relationship and was still
preparing my heart to love a guy.
Do you now see why my mind is made up? I couldn't hold
it any longer, I couldn't stand the embarrassment anymore. I
was determined to get myself a lover to avoid being called
old fashion and also, join the league of hot girls in my area.
That was my decision.
But I had restrictions. There were lots of fears surrounding
my decision. Just as I've heard my friends talk about how
much they enjoy their relationships, I've also heard some
talk about how their hearts were broken by their lovers.
My heart is delicate and precious, I valued it so much and
didn’t want it to be toiled with by some guy out there. I
thought of what to do to avert this challenge and an idea
immediately dropped; I should talk to someone about my
fears, I thought.
Then again, I had issues but this time, the issue was who I
was going to talk to. There were people around me but I
needed who will understand me better. Someone who
wouldn't judge or call me names.
I thought of my mum but no. That would be moving from
frying pan to fire. She won't understand me one bit and
might even make the situation worse.
I thought hard for 2 days but didn't come up with any
solution but on the third day, I remembered I had a friend to
whom I could relate with. Her name was Zikora, my
pastor's daughter.
Zikora and I were best of friends. Our friendship started
from preschool and my mum was completely safe with our
friendship because she was a Pastor's daughter.
I come from a Christian home and my mum was a
disciplinarian that does not entertain boys talk. As a matter
of fact, she doesn't allow friendship with people she doesn't
know much about their family background. She only
allowed my friendship with Zikora because she was my
Pastor's daughter. That was how strict my mum was.
My mum wasn't just a disciplinarian, she was a good
Christian that never failed to tell me and my siblings about
Christ.
She really did a good job trying to bring me closer to God
but I would say that I lacked understanding and knowing
what I know now, I would add that the god of this world
blinded my eyes.
This doesn't mean that I did not love God or attended
church services. I partook in every religious practice
actively. At that time, I believed that I was a born-again
Christian but I also had the notion that being a Christian
does not mean that I should not have a lover.
I met with Zikora and she assured me that desiring to be
loved isn't bad and that it comes naturally. She advised that
I stop restraining myself from getting what I desired. She
practically told me to enjoy life to the fullest.
My mum has told me a lot about self-control especially
when the relationship with the opposite sex is concerned
but I dismissed her words thinking that she was old-
fashioned. I took seriously the words of my best friend. I
mean why won't I? It sounded like the truth.
She said that we were in a new era with new information
and so most of our parents don’t know or understand our
needs.
Since my mum did not understand me; at least I thought
she didn't, I kept to myself most time and sometimes share
them with my best friend who was always ready to listen
and tell me what she thought was best. There were so many
imaginations and thoughts that went through my head,
thoughts that would have been well analyzed if I had
spoken to my mum but I chose not to let her know.
Following Zikora's advice, I decided to loosen up. I decided
to go into a relationship. After making that decision, I felt
like one who was released from the police cell after so
many years, the freedom I sensed was real to me.
I suddenly could not wait to have my prince charming pop
the question and I was prepared to say yes to him. I was
overjoyed that I was going to join the big girls' gang. The
happiness was real. At some point, I felt like I was in it
already, I could sense the feeling of being loved by a guy,
phew, it's going to be amazing; so I thought.
Amid all the excitement, there was still a part of me that
reminded me that I was on the wrong path. I remembered
that my mum always told us that the teenage stage is a
stage that should be dedicated to studies and personal
development.
To get rid of that part of me, I convinced myself that I was
going to create a balance between my relationship and
studies. I made myself believe that I was going to combine
the two perfectly.
My mind was made up. Having a boyfriend was at the top
of my priority list and I wasn't going to let my studies stand
in the way of my happiness, no not me!
Confidence is knowing the right thing to do and
courageously doing it regardless of what trends or friends
say.
The worst thing that can happen to any young person is to
be blinded by the god of this age. The only way out of
spiritual blindness is yielding to God's word (studying and
obeying).
Carefully choose the people you associate yourself with,
they must be people of like minds. If you must fulfill your
purpose, you must associate with people that have the same
goal as yours because iron sharpens iron.
CHAPTER THREE
I had already written Jamb and post UTME to gain
admission into the university, hoping and praying very hard
to gain admission. Now, you may be thinking that I was a
very serious student who wanted to really gain admission
because I loved to study, well, on the contrary, I just
wanted to get out of my parent's sight.
I had plans on how I wanted to live my life as a university
Babe. I was determined to live and enjoy my life to the
fullest. I truly wanted to be as free as a bird and live just
the way I wanted.
I always dreamed of having my way while in the university,
I saw the tertiary institution as a place where I would live
with no family interference, with no do it this way or that
way.
My dream gradually started to play out. It felt more real
when my friends started calling to break the news of their
admission into different tertiary institutions. I felt like I was
the one announcing the good news to them.
I did well in my exams and so, I was sure that my name
would be on the list. I just had to wait for the list to be
released, I reassured myself. While I was reassuring
myself, Zikora ran into my room joyfully with a folded
paper in her hand.
We were friends for a very long time and so, she had
complete access to anywhere in my house, she was more
like a big sister.
Immediately after I saw the slip, I figured she has been
offered admission into the university but I had to wait to
hear from her.
She shouted at the top of her voice, Joanna, guess what!
You are very happy this afternoon, I guess you have been
offered admission into the university, am I right? I
inquired.
Yes! you guessed right baby girl, Babes, my best life is
here, she responded while cat walking with her shoulders
high.
I'm now a campus big girl, I will ensure that I live my life
to the fullest, she continued.
That phase was an important one in our lives. It was
obvious that our decisions at that time will either make or
mar us but we weren't ready for that conversation. We
weren't ready to check the pros and cons of our decision
because we thought we were really smart and could avert
every con. We were bent on enjoying our lives and giving
our hearts everything they desire.
Zikora and I continued with our plans. I always gotideas
each time we discussed how we were going to live on
campus. Zikora amazed me often with her wealth of
knowledge, I mean, she knew so much already that I
wonder how she got exposed even though her father was a
pastor.
She played my mum on that one. My mum was
comfortable with our friendship because of her family
background not knowing that Zikora was already into the
things of the world. Had she known, she would have
banned her from visiting because she strongly believed that
evil communication corrupts good manners. This was why
I didn't let her know about our plans and I tried as much as
possible to behave well. To her, I was still her innocent
baby girl. I had to put on that act to maintain my mother's
trust in me.
I was so happy with the news of zikora's admission, I sat up
from the bed and watched zikora as she cat walked. We
laughed so hard but my mind couldn't stop reminding me
that I was yet to be admitted.
I can't stand staying at home for a year o, please, I can't
wait for my name to be out o, this congratulations has to be
said to me too, I said to Zikora.
We continued celebrating zikora's admission. We played
music and danced to Christian songs. Oh yeah! we danced
to Christian songs because secular songs were banned in
my home. We weren’t just celebrating Zikora's admission
but also a gradual step into our world.
CHAPTER FOUR
My struggle with worldly passions kept increasing, my
mum didn’t know that her only daughter was struggling
with lots of worldly desires.
Mummy thought that I was very much on the right track
since I didn't joke with any church activity. To me, that was
a very rare opportunity to mingle with my friends in the
church, but to my mum, I loved the things of God.
Well, I did but lacked the confidence to live based on what
I believed. Also, I allowed worldly desires to overtake my
thoughts. My friend zikora was also a strong influence.
Mum thought zikora was the best girl being a Pastor's
daughter. On many occasions in the church, she won
scholarships for reciting a chapter of the bible. I mean who
wouldn’t be amazed by that? Zikora was very smart and
good with words but very pretentious.
Zikora came from a Christian home, the father was a well-
known pastor and her mum was a worker in the Church’s
prayer department. She was a very smart girl that knows
the right word to use at all times, her bad lifestyle cannot be
detected or even suspected. Who would even think such
about zikora? She was the most punctual teenager as long
as activities in the church were concerned. Most parents
even compared her to their children.
The other day, I was at Janet’s house. We were talking
about school and were about to leave for church when her
mum badged into her room.
I wasn't sure what the problem was until I heard her ask
"Why are you girls still here, don't you know it is time for
bible study?" She didn't stop there. "You both are here
wasting time while Zikora your mate is already in the
church, a girl that knows what she is doing. She does not
wait for anyone to remind or police her about". She
continued.
I looked at Janet and noticed that her mother's comparison
didn't go down well with her, I could see how miserable she
was. She told her mum that we were on our way out before
she came.
As an African mum, she didn't stop ranting. "Do you have
to wait for me to come back before you leave for bible
study? You girls like making it seem as if your mothers are
not trying their best to train you. How else do you want me
to do that? Please, disappear from this house already!"
Janet and I jumped out of the house as though we were
being pursued. While we were at it, Janet began to mumble,
saying that it’s only God that knows who is who. I heard
her say that she may have her weaknesses but she's 100%
real and that she will keep working on herself to become
better.
On hearing her say those words, I was astonished that I had
to ask if her mum thinks zikora was better than her.
Well, I wouldn't blame the woman. She only sees what
zikora does to cover up her real self without knowing who
she really was, I mean, Zikora was my best friend and I
knew who she really was.
I turned to Janet, made sure I looked her in the eyes, and
told her just how much I admired her strength and courage
to always stand out. I revealed to her that I sometimes
wished that I had her kind of boldness and courage to live
right. I also told her that I’ve tried to do that sometimes but
I always found myself joining the trend. My curiosity
always overruled my self-control.
She thanked me so much and told me what I found difficult
to believe. She said that she haven't received compliments
from anyone before.
She really appreciated me for complimenting her. I could
feel the joy in her words.
"Most times, I feel like I'm doing the unpopular things, I
only draw strength from the fact that I’m on the right track
and the deep joy and peace that I feel within. I practically
do not feel pressured like I see most young girls do. My
main focus right now is discovering who I am and giving
myself the proper training and connections that I need to
fulfill my purpose. Presently, I’m trying my best to connect
with people that exude only positivity, intentional living,
and confidence building", she said.
Her words sounded nice but somehow, I was bored and felt
less of myself while she was talking. I decided to also let
her know that I too had a dream.
I said to her, "Janet, we have different dreams. Yeah! I
know that I have to achieve my career dreams, but I also
know that I want to enjoy this life big time. I have to feel
among and also hang out with happening babes. Girl see
eh, I just can’t wait for my name to be short-listed".
I was still talking when my phone rang. I looked to see who
it was and noticed it was Zikora. I picked up the call and
she told me that a friend of hers who applied for admission
in the same school as me got admitted recently and that she
was sure that a new list was published.
I ended the call after assuring her that I was going right
away to check if mine was out. I sensed Janet felt the
anxiety in my voice and as expected, she asked what the
problem was.
I quickly told her that a new list was released and I needed
to go check if my name was on the list. I asked her to head
to the church alone while I rush to the cybercafé to check
the list as I won't be able to concentrate if I went to the
church instead.
She accepted and wished me well.

CHAPTER 5
Standing in front of the mirror with a glass of fresh juice, I
was putting on my bra and my bum short while inside my
room. Cheers to a dream come true, I said to myself.
I was really overwhelmed when I saw a congratulatory
message as the cybercafé attendant typed in my jamb
registration number into the jamb portal. I screamed with so
much excitement, so much that people there would think I
won millions of dollars.
It was a big win for me, I mean, who wouldn't want to be
away from home and live a freedom-filled life? I could not
even wait for my parents to be back, I quickly called and
informed them. I also called my best friend Zikora. The joy
was just so much because our plans were about to see the
light of day.
Mum was super busy preparing lots of things for me, I felt
so happy knowing that I just had less than 3 weeks to be
with my parents. I used my savings to buy very revealing
clothes; a girl has to look very attractive on campus you
know.
As the day drew nearer, I would often lock my room and
wear some of the clothes that I bought. I would stare at
myself in the mirror and would wish my departure date is
the next day. I was so eager to leave.
The day finally came and I was completely ready to be that
campus girl one cannot help but look twice at. It was
indeed a very long drive from the south down to the east. I
entered the school premises late and was so tired that I only
managed to get a space in the hostel to lay my head.
The next day, I began with the Registration, it was really a
tiring one as I moved from one office to another. At one
point, I got tired and really wanted to go home.
Everything was so boring and hectic. The registration
officers also contributed to my pain, on a few occasions,
they complained about my dressing, spilling hurtful words
at me. One of them said, "This one that dressed like this,
she thinks she is here for fashion. I know people like her
were helped to gain admission, because I know she doesn’t
know anything".
Those words were really painful but they didn't stop me
from living my life the way I wanted.
I wondered why those staff couldn't mind their business but
one thing that made me happy was the fact that I won't be
seeing them after my registration.
Amongst all that attended to me, a particular guy was really
helpful. He was kind and well-mannered. I had just walked
out of the admin block premises, when I heard a guy call
my name from a distance, asking how I was.
I was perturbed because I knew that I haven't told anyone
in the school my name. I kept wondering who he might be.
He was already very close to me when I looked and noticed
that he was the guy from the bursary unit.
You know, I actually had a crush on him, considering how
he helped me plus he looked quite handsome.
I replied, "Oh, I am fine. Thank you for helping me the
other day.
Showcasing his nice teeth arrangement, he said, "Oh, it’s
nothing. That’s what friends do for their friends.
When I heard what he said, I was overjoyed but didn’t want
to show it. I simply said, "Thank you for considering me to
be your friend". He told me that it was fine and requested
for my contact.
I quickly typed in my contact and he called my line
immediately and introduced himself as Davis. It happened
so fast and I was happy with myself for attracting a cute
guy already.
On my first day in class, I looked around in search of girls
that dressed like me. While I was looking around, a light-
skinned beautiful lady tapped me on my shoulder and asked
if I was able to get the handout that was released.
She looked so perfect; she was light-skinned, had a pointed
nose with straight legs, and she even dressed more than
myself. I mean, she looked hot and sexy.
Yes, I responded.
She asked if she can use mine to make a photocopy for
herself and I willingly said yes but on the condition that I
would have to go with her.
We headed towards the photocopying stand. On our way,
she complimented my gown and said it fits me, and brought
out my shape.
I thanked her for her compliment and also complimented
her beauty. I later introduced myself and she also
introduced herself as Princess Diana AKA Sexy original.
I have got a good friend just on the first day of lecture, I am
very certain she would fit in so well, I said to myself.
After getting her copy, we exchanged contact and parted
ways.

The desires of a man open him up to people that will help

bring those desires to reality, especially when it’s negative.
The devil has a way of lining up destiny destroyers, the
moment you give him room for that.

CHAPTER SIX
Davis was everywhere around me. When he wasn’t with
me, he called to check on me, and gradually we started
hanging out late into the night.
Davis was such a sweet soul, he was the kind of guy I
wished for in every ramification. Seeing how good he was
to me, I assumed he loved me and that we were already
dating even though he never asked me out officially. I loved
him with everything in me because he was my first love. A
day without talking to Davis wasn’t a good day for me at
all.
Davis made love so sweet and easy, he always appreciated
how I dressed, and always gave me lots of money to
maintain my beauty.
A few months into our relationship, Davis pleaded that I
help him prepare food and store it in his fridge. That was
my first time going over to his place, I was so excited to
help him out. That day I prepared two different soups and a
pot of stew for him.
When he came back, he hugged me so tight that I was lost
in his arms. I felt like remaining there, I didn't want to let
go. He caressed my body and kissed me for a long time.
That was his way of showing how happy he was with the
food I cooked for him.
After a while, it was like he got back to his senses and took
his hands off me immediately saying that we shouldn't be
doing that just yet.
I bowed my head in shame and nodded, indicating that I
agreed with him.
It seems like it's your first time, he asked and I replied yes.
He apologized and I made him understand that it was
alright so long as he is involved.
My words pleased his heart, he drew me closer to himself
and started caressing me again. I couldn’t control myself; I
was so lost in his arms.
Considering how good Davis was to me, I didn’t think it
was bad to let him have me. He was such a good lover.
I spent a few more days at his place. Those days were
indeed memorable; we ate together, bath together, and did
many things together, just like couples.
While I was at his place, I didn’t have any double mind
doing all those things with him because to me he deserved
everything.
…When the flesh rules a man, he loses spiritual sensitivity
and can hardly discern anything as the flesh is now in
charge…
While with him, I couldn’t contain my joy. I thought that
the prince charming that I desired was there and I got the
best of them. Davis showered me with so much love and
lots of gifts.
Exactly 11 months into our relationship, Davis told me that
he will be traveling. According to him, he was given three
weeks' leave. I was so sad that he didn’t want to spend his
leave with me. Was he getting tired of me already and
needed some time alone? I asked myself.
I tried to make him wait till after our first anniversary
which I was planning for a long time but my effort proved
abortive. He insisted that he must travel, he tried
convincing me to let him go, saying that he had a business
he wanted to survey.
I had no choice but to accept. That period was the loneliest
moment of my life. It became worse after three weeks
when I stopped hearing from him. I tried severally to
contact him but his number was not connecting.
Days, weeks, and months passed and I couldn’t reach
Davis. I cried every night prayed for his safety. I took a
bold step and went to his office to ask after him. At first, I
didn’t know how to go about it but my intense love for him
pushed me into doing what I wasn’t used to.
Against all odds, I went there and inquired of his where
about strategically. The information I got shocked me to my
bone marrow. For a few minutes, I could not breathe or
think properly. I only managed to pull myself together and
went back to my hostel.

CHAPTER SEVEN
What? Do you mean all this while Davis has been playing
you?
Babe, I told you not to trust guys. Guys are not to be trusted
but played with. I told you but you wouldn’t listen. I have
more than three men on me, I decide how they treat me and
they are all over me. Men like it when they pursue you and
not when you throw yourself at them, Diana told me.
Babe, I haven’t recovered from the shock yet. All this
while, Davis was just a Corp member and I never noticed.
How?
I mean, all the love I thought he showered on me was only
tricks he played to have me? I’ve been fooled. Can I ever
recover from this pain? I cried out.
Diana took it upon herself to help me recover from my
heartbreak, she allowed me to live with her.
While I was with her, I noticed that some days Diana leaves
the house so late at the night and returns very early the next
day. We sleep together every night but most times, I wake
up at the middle of the night to meet her absence.
I took the courage to ask where she goes at night and she
revealed the secret about her lifestyle. She was a stripper
and goes to clubs every night.
Diana was a very beautiful and intelligent young girl. She
was so young that no one would ever imagine that she has
gone far in things like that.
How do you feel being a stripper, I asked?
Does it matter how I feel? What is most important is that I
am living my dream life and there's nothing I want that I
cannot afford.
Are your parents aware of this and how did you begin to
live such a life? I probed further.
Way back in the boarding house, we always sneaked out of
the school to go have some fun. My parents weren’t aware
of my lifestyle. They believed just what I told them and of
course, they were too busy with work to even find out, she
narrated.
You can follow me one of these days and see things for
yourself. It’s fun, I’m so sure that you will love it. After all,
you are no longer a virgin, so there is nothing new to you
and nothing to lose, She added.
I thought deeply about what Diana said and I thought she
was right. What was I still preserving after all? I have lost
my virginity and there’s nothing I can do about it, I said to
myself.
Still giving Diana’s suggestion a second thought, I said out
loud, “Diana is living in a good apartment and lacks
nothing. She is a big girl on campus and living the life that
every girl wants to have. Maybe, I should just give it a try”.
I was ready for Diana to coach me, the emptiness I felt in
my heart was intense. Living Diana's kind of life wasn’t in
my plans. What my heart wanted was someone who will
love me and appreciate my love but I accepted to follow
her for the first night.
…It is one thing to lose your virginity and yet another thing
to lose your dignity. Losing virginity is a day's pleasure but
losing dignity is losing your worth. Losing your virginity in
whichever way is not enough reason to believe you have
become worthless…

CHAPTER 8
You can hardly look at me and not turn to have a second
look. I took the last glance at myself in the mirror before I
picked up my small pouch which matched my shoes. I had
invited a professional make-up artist for a quick glam.
I was fully ready to be at the club with Diana. When she
was done, we stepped out and boarded a taxi to the club. At
the club that night, guys were all over me. I kept blushing, I
mean, who wouldn’t?
My eye met with one of the guys. He looked very cute, and
gentle. I wished and prayed that he would just say hello to
me.
I watched many young girls going around other men,
rubbing their hands all over their bodies, dancing, and
trying to get their attention. I knew I wanted a man, but I
wasn’t interested in all the happenings in the club.
I sat down in a corner and got busy with my phone. While
at it, I perceived a very nice fragrance behind me. The dude
wearing the nice fragrance walked toward me from behind.
Hello beautiful! You look lost in here just like myself. By
the way, I am Maxwell, he said stretching his right hand
towards me.
It’s my first time here. I was bored at home and so I
decided to come with a friend to chill, I replied while
shaking his hands.
Oh wow! I am really lost, I followed a friend here as well.
You look really beautiful and sexy. I like you. Can I at least
have your number? Maxwell said.
Thanks for your compliment. You’re cute and smell nice
too, I replied.
He gave me his phone to type in my contact. We chatted for
a while and he excused himself to go join his friend.
Everything happened so fast. Maxwell was very romantic
and sweet but that didn’t stop me from investigating him to
avoid what happened before.
After my investigation, I found out that Maxwell was in his
penultimate year in mechanical engineering. We became
friends on social media.
Maxwell was a social media celebrity with over 500,000
followers. After some time, we started dating. Our love was
an enviable one because Maxwell was every woman’s
dream man. He was rich, influential, and, cute.
Maxwell and I became the popular love birds on campus.
You would always find me with Maxwell. At some point, I
moved into his apartment. I was careful and protective of
him because many ladies had their eyes on him.
It was about 2:00 am, I felt a touch and I quickly opened
my eyes but didn’t move an inch. What I saw that night
was unpleasant and I was restless.
I have never felt or seen Maxwell behave strangely and so I
never suspected him. As I opened my eyes slightly, I saw
Maxwell with my hair comb trying to remove the hairs that
were trapped on it. I pretended to be deeply asleep while I
watched him, trying to figure out what he was using them
for. When he was done putting them in a small zip lock
bag, he left the room.
Within a second, my nightwear was soaked with sweat. Oh
my God, what have I done to myself, I only wanted a lover,
a special person to feel the vacuum I felt within, I said to
myself in a low tone.
Many things ran through my mind at that moment.
I said to myself, “Oh, this may be the reason why I have
been performing so badly in my academics. Oh, Maxwell
belongs to the underworld and has stolen my intelligence.
…Do not awaken love until it so desires. Awakening love
when the time is not ripe is the same as opening the door
for an armed robber. You are at the mercy of the thief, if he
chooses to kill you, then you are gone.
Love is intoxicating and if awakened at the wrong time, can
choke to death or cause great danger…
​

​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​
​ ​

CHAPTER NINE
My last two semesters' result was extremely poor. I started
performing badly academically when I started going out
with Maxwell. On several occasions, I experienced
memory loss.
The last thing on my mind was going to ask Maxwell what
the meaning of what I saw him doing last night was.
The only thing on my mind at that point was how to run
away from Maxwell and be out of his reach. Everything my
mum has been teaching me began recurring in my head.
Oh God! If you save me from his hands, I will amend my
ways and live only for you, I prayed secretly.
I pretended to be fine when Maxwell entered the room. I
carried my laptop to continue with my assignment and for
the first time, I took notice of a bible passage that popped
up on my screen.
Hebrew 2:3 to be precise.
“How shall we escape if we pay no attention to such a great
salvation?” NLT
The Lord Himself first announced this salvation and those
who heard him proved to us that it is true.
I could hear a voice speaking loud to me.
“Oh, the message of salvation, a privilege to be grasped.
The message that preserves us from being reached by the
enemy. The message that orders our steps and life in the
right direction. The message that satisfies and fills every
vacuum that we feel. The message that makes us escape
every vile that the enemy projects”.
I fell to my knees and wailed. While crying, I said to
myself, “ I neglected the message of salvation for so long. I
didn’t know that my neglect of this salvation message
would cost me so much. I didn’t know that I will be trapped
in a situation like this for neglecting this message. Is there
still hope for me? Oh lord, if thou would show me mercy.
My phone rang severally, after a while, I picked up my
phone and saw several missed calls from my mum. I was so
weak to hold my phone. I mustered the courage to call my
mum but I was not ready to share my ordeals with her just
yet.
Joanna, I have had several dreams about you going mad on
campus. What is going on in your life? My baby, you can
open up to me and share whatever it is you are going
through with me, my mother said to me.
Mum, do you believe that I will run mad? I replied.
No, my daughter, she said convincingly.
Then, I will not run mad mum, just put me in your prayers
at all times. I am doing very fine, mum. Thank you for all
you do mum, I love you. I said to her and ended the call.
My mind was filled with thoughts on how to escape from
Maxwell’s apartment without him looking for me
immediately until I regain my sanity.
I wrote a short note and dropped it on his table. In the note,
I wrote,
“I will be traveling home to be with my parents for
something. I know this is coming so sudden but bear with
me. I will be with them for a long time.
Thank you.
Joanna.
When I dropped the letter, I packed everything I have in
that house and left for my lodge. I was still thinking of the
best place to go when I remembered that someone I met
during my registration told me that the fellowship
secretariat is the safest place and that I could come stay
with her anything I want.
Hours later, Maxwell’s neighbour whom I always chatted
with while I was with him, called and began to narrate
Maxwell’s reaction when he got back. He told me that he
heard Maxwell saying strange things that he didn’t
understand and decided to call me immediately.
According to him, when Maxwell got back, he entered his
apartment and began to ask why his room was scanty and
where I was.
He said he was about knocking on Maxwell’s door to let
him know that I left with my belongings before he started
to hear him say strange things.
“Oh wow! Joanna left. I suspected she saw something last
night but I didn’t pay attention to it. Anyways, she cannot
leave just like that. I still have a few months to complete
my assignment in her life, Maxwell said.
No, not now, Joanna is too late, I have to finish what I have
already started. Oh, Joanna, You can’t eat your cake and
have it, yeah! I have a plan. I will get you again, He added.
Maxwell’s neighbour told me that he tiptoed back to his
room to prevent Maxwell from knowing that he heard
every thing.
After hearing what he said. I appreciated him for the
information and hung up the call.
Not long, I discovered that Maxwell belonged to a
fraternity and in their kingdom, a lot of them have different
assignments and are planted in strategic places to fulfill
their mission, and every successful mission attracts lots of
influence to their world. They also get lots of money and
social media influence.
Maxwell was planted in my school to distract as many
students as possible, sleep with them, steal their excellent
spirit, and leave them in utter confusion and depression.
While in my room, I knelt and prayed like never before. I
looked up to heaven and said, “I deserve any kind of
punishment from you right now, Lord. If you decide to give
me the punishment that I deserve, I may not survive it, oh
lord. Please, look upon me with your great mercy and
loving Kindness. Please, save me from my mess so that
what I dread most will not come upon me”.
After praying, I began to get ready to go to the secretariat.
While I was at it, my phone rang severally but I didn’t pick
up because it was Maxwell calling.
After the fourth time, I picked up the call just to hear what
he was going to say.
Hello babe, he said. What happened? Why did you leave? I
got you your dream gift, let’s hang out tonight. I’m sure
you will love the gift, he continued.
OK, Maxwell, I replied.
I hung up the call on him because I didn’t want to engage
in a long discussion.
A gift? I exclaimed.
Not anymore, Maxwell. I know better now.
Maxwell knew that I love gift and he used it as bait to get
me back to his devilish assignment.

… A gift is a bait the enemy uses to trap many souls. Only

the gift of God makes rich and adds no sorrow.
The gift of the enemy brings sorrow and regrets. If anyone
is wise then he must know that all gifts are not to be
accepted…

CHAPTER 10
I was sure Maxwell waited for me to come hang out with
him and take his devilish gift.
I didn’t go and for the first time, I was happy I disappointed
him. I went to my school pastor and opened up to him. He
prayed and led me to Christ. He also booked a counseling
section for me for 6days. Each counseling day, he explored
the book of Ephesians with me.
Ephesians 2:1-6
1. ​As for you, you were dead in your transgressions
and sins.
2. In which you used to live when you followed the ways of
the world and the ruler of the kingdom of the air the spirit
who is now at work in those who are obedient.
4. But because of his great love for us, God who is rich in
mercy made us alive even when we were dead in
transgressions. It is by grace you have been saved.NLT
Oh! How limitless and unfathomable is the love of God, I
exclaimed.
It was as though that particular scripture was written for
me. Despite how I have hardened my heart to the many
teachings I have heard, God was still gracious to show me
mercy.
Truly, nothing can stop God from loving us. We can only
reject His love but he doesn’t get tired of loving us. He is
ever ready and willing to welcome us back to his fold and
give us a new spirit. How purposeless is a life outside of
Christ, for it is only when we are in Christ we actually live.

On the contrary, I thought life was in living in trends and

satisfying the flesh, I continued.
Within the 6 days of counseling, my eyes were greatly
opened, and I had a better understanding.
I began the journey of a sincere walk with God in a bid to
reciprocate the Love God showed me. The love of God
gripped my heart.
I was handed over to the joint campus Christian body for
follow-up. I left my room and stayed with the executives of
the Christian body on campus.
My past haunted me, my heart was filled with so much
regret. I felt so filthy most time attending activities or even
praying.
2 Corinthians 5:17
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature, old
things are passed away, and behold, all things are new.NLT
Joanna read that again. Look, this feeling of guilt will deny
you the love God has extended to you. It will deprive you
of sweet fellowship with a father that has longed for you.
Joanna, explore and enjoy the new life God has brought to
you and you will find out that your mess will be your
message to your world. Be intentional about your new life,
Pelumi said.
Pelumi was the prayer secretary of the joint Christian body.
She had her story as well and she shared it to encourage
me.
Pelumi was trapped in a secret sin of masturbation and she
was also addicted to pornography. She was in a wrong
relationship with a supposed brother in the Lord but they
engaged in all forms of fondling and romance in their
relationship.
Pelumi was becoming a shadow of herself, she wanted to
stop, but would always find herself doing the same thing
she promised herself not to do again. No one knew her
struggles, everyone was still seeing her as the firebrand
sister.
Bro Jide convinced her that it was normal to be in one sin
or another as no one is perfect. He had his way of luring her
to do those things she wanted to stop by all means.
Pelumi always found herself in tears asking God for
forgiveness whenever she falls into that mess. When God
showed her mercy, she was led to open up to a senior
friend.
Her senior friend prayed with her and prayerfully told her
to pull out of the relationship which has so entangled her in
the mess. That was the beginning of her deliverance. The
relationship was the strong rope that kept dragging her to
the pit.
After breaking free from the relationship she became a
strong advocate of sexual purity. God used her mightily to
save young ones caught up in the web of secret sin.
After she narrated her story, I was encouraged to let go of
my past.
For several weeks, I only put on my phone to attend to only
important calls because I wanted to avoid Maxwell's calls. I
didn’t tell any of my friends I left him with no clue. I also
missed classes for weeks, and Maxwell wasn’t able to track
me.
When it was obvious that I needed to start attending
lectures so I can meet up with the exams which were
already fast approaching, the fear of seeing Maxwell
gripped me.
How do I face him? What will I say to him? So many
questions started to go through my mind. I sat down back
on my bed unsure of what to do next. I reluctantly picked
up my bible and a piece of paper fell off it. I picked it up to
check if it was something important and I saw that a Bible
quotation 2 Timothy 1:7 was written on it
“For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power,
and love, and of a sound mind” KJV.
Powerful, I exclaimed. I could not explain how the paper
got into my bible but I was sure that the verse I read was
the word I needed to pull through.
I declared to myself;
I am strong and so, I fear no man or any situation. I move
in boldness and without fear.
I continued declaring those words until I began to pray, I
prayed and was overtaken by the Holy Spirit, until I felt
less burdened and secured.
I felt better, secured, and determined to move out. After the
prayer, I was sure that I can boldly tell Maxwell that I am a
new person with new values and perceptions, no longer the
Joanna he used to know.
CHAPTER 11
Joanna, Christabella called out. For the first time in a while
now, you agreed to walk through this path. I’m impressed
with how fast you are healing. Look at you, you are no
longer scared or teary knowing that this path reminds you
of a lot of things. I’m the happiest person right now, my
friend is now very courageous and has laid to rest her past,
kudos Babe. She said happily.
Christabella was my close friend in my new room. She was
there for me; encouraging, praying and teaching me the
truth in God's word. Christabella also has her ugly past and
so she counseled with experience and her counsel was
filled with God's spirit. Whenever she spoke to me, it felt
like God was talking directly to me.
Christabella was still talking to me when I muttered to
myself, “ I'm not going to hide my face from him. Today is
the day I’m going to tell Maxwell that I’m done with my
old life and that I know of all his evil assignments in this
institution.
What Is The Problem Joanna? Christabella asked.
Look Over there, I pointed towards our library block.
That’s Maxwell cuddling with another big fish he wants to
destroy. I feel sorry for all the girls in his net and I wish
God rescue them from his hands, I continued.
As we drew closer to where Maxwell was, my heart raced
faster than a hurricane but I insisted not to run away from
him again, he should rather be afraid of me.
Almost Immediately, Maxwell looked in our direction, he
whispered to the girl he was caressing, stood up, and
moved towards me. When he got to where I was, he held
my hand and dragged me to a corner.
Leave me alone Maxwell. What right do you have to drag
me like your slave, I screamed.
You are my slave, don’t you know? Oh, you think you can
eat your cake and have it back, Maxwell said laughing
wickedly.
See Joanna, he continued. I have a collection of your nude
pictures and videos of our sexual escapades. I will not
hesitate to post them online to let the whole world see you,
he threatened.
I looked him straight in the eyes and said fearlessly,
“Maxwell, you have already done enough, I am not the
Joanna you use to know. I am a new creature and going
back to my old ways is what I will never do.
I know I have an ugly past but I'm a brand new being now,
living a beautiful life that I'm enjoying so much. I have
loads of Joy and peace now. This was actually the life I
wanted but I was deceived. Let this be the last time you
will ever stop me on my way and tell me rubbish”. I yelled.
After yelling at him, I left him. He stood there for a while,
and later shouted, “Expect your video everywhere”. I
totally ignored him.
What video is he talking about Joanna, Christabella asked.
My dear, he said he has collections of my nude pictures and
sex videos but never mind. God already whispered to me.
He said that He will give me glory instead of shame.
Something big and undeserving is sprouting out of my life
my friend. I will battle this in the secret place, I said.

The road to being free from bondage orchestrated by the

devil is first being free from the spirit that wants to destroy
us. Secondly, renewing and having a sound mind which
births uncommon boldness and courage, and Lastly, our
decision and effort to make sure we are freed. I love your
courage Joanna, God has really shown you mercy,
Christabella said to me.
All this wouldn’t have been possible if not for the pure love
I received from you and everyone in the room. Despite
knowing so much about me, you all believed I could be my
best self. You all took me by hand till this point. I:m
eternally grateful, I said wearing a thankful expression.
We are not better than you Joanna, I have been in a worse
mess. Mine was a battle within me. I was addicted to
Pornography and Masturbation. No day went by that I
didn’t watch pornography and masturbate afterward,
Christabella encouraged.
I was so ashamed of myself. I prayed so much and believed
that God will deliver me from that act or take my life. I
became a shadow of myself and only managed to put up a
smile when I'm with people. No one knew my struggles
until I felt a strong urge to talk to someone, She continued.
“Tell it to someone, a person you trust”, that was the most
difficult instruction I ever received, she said. How could I?
A spirit-filled sister, well known in the fellowship.
I struggled so much but finally heeded to the instruction. I
asked God to direct me to whom I should tell it.
I was in a dream one of the days and found myself going
through a counseling and prayer section with sister Tobi. I
woke up and had a very strong feeling to meet with her to
narrate my ordeals. I did as God led me. It was a huge
relief. After narrating my ordeal to her, I felt like a very big
load was lifted from me, she continued.
Sister Tobi was really a great vessel God used. When I
narrated my struggles to her, she cried with me, took me by
hand, and with that tears, declared my freedom. She didn’t
stop counseling and feeding me with the word of God until
I was strong again.
Just like you said, Christabella continued, dealing with
every demon in one’s life begins by first disagreeing with
the spirit championing that bad lifestyle and intentional
efforts to be delivered from the spirit championing the acts.
Secondly, mind renewal happens. I was so much intentional
about what goes into my mind, that I stopped following so
many pages on Facebook, Instagram, and Tiktok. I also
disciplined myself. I made up my mind not to watch
pornography films again no matter the urge. I would rather
give my phone to sister Tobi, I always give it to sister Tobi
whenever the urge increases.
It was not an easy journey, but God made it possible. And
Here I am redeemed and whole, she said happily.

…The truth is, our mess is our message and our ministry
sprouts out from It.
Today, I specially dedicate my time to helping many to be
free from the powers of addiction. Many times, God sent
them to me for counseling. Indeed, God knows how to roll
our shame away and give us glory instead…
CHAPTER 12
Joanna, I'm sure you are yet to see this. Your name has
gone viral on social media. Come and see for yourself,
Christabella said as she walked towards me.
While she walked toward me, I muttered to myself with a
shaky voice, “Did Maxwell post my nude pictures online?”
Well, I know that God won’t Let Him, I said convincingly.
I fasted, cried, and prayed to God to confirm His word to
me. I muttered “I believe your word to me Lord. You said
that or Instead of my shame, you will give me Glory.
Maxwell will not Just lose those videos as you will wipe
them from His phone, you will take away the heart of stone
the enemy has given him. Your mercy will be extended to
him and you will deliver him from the work of darkness
and bring him to your light, I prayed with everything in me,
I continued.
When Christabella got to where I was, she showed me the
post Maxwell made about me. We both read out the post.
The caption was written boldly.
“GOD'S LOVE AND JEALOUSY OVER HIS
CHILDREN HAS CAPTURED MY HEART.
If there is a God that saves and cleans, it’s the almighty
God. He has proven to me that Joanna is His. What
happened to me last night was unbelievable and I'm going
to summarize it by saying that the almighty God gives his
own, glory instead of shame. He is a preserver and worthy
to be served forever and for this, I surrender my life to
Him. He is a worthy and Most Merciful God”.
We were both surprised and happy after reading his post.
Maxwell was an influencer on social media and used his
handle to attack many religious doctrines and also,
promoted Immorality. No one expected such a post from
him.
He came out openly to acknowledge God and that really
created an uproar online. The post went viral, bloggers
carried the news and that made my name go beyond the
shores of Nigeria.
Because of his post, my name became among the most
searched word and I gained a lot of followers.
A lot of people wanted to hear the full gist, others wanted
to gain value from the one that God used to make Maxwell
Repent but I wasn’t ready to share my story just yet. I made
a firm decision to make use of the platform God has given
to me to bring souls to His kingdom.
When I got back to my hostel, I knelt to praise God because
I was overwhelmed with all that happened.
God is merciful and wonderful, I said with tears rolling
down my cheek. He chose me, even when I considered
myself Inadequate. My mess is a message to the world. I
won’t let this opportunity slip off my fingers, I continued.
After praying, I stood up to get my phone to see what was
happening on my social media page. I tried severally to log
in but noticed my phone was hanging. I left the phone for
about 2 hours after which I picked it up again.
This time, I was able to log in but was shocked at what I
saw. Over 30,000 notifications and over 10, 000 messages.
I couldn’t believe it. I scrolled to my timeline and dropped
a message God gave me last night.
The message was, “In such a time as this, I am here to take
as many that have wandered in deep darkness by hand and
bring them to see and embrace the marvelous work of
God”.
Within a few minutes, many people indicated their
willingness to have an encounter with God.
At that point, I remembered that God told me that He is
sending me to many nations to rescue men from perishing.
To help them find a stand in Him and experience His
unfailing love, as well as align to his Plans and purposes
but I didn’t know it was going to be this quick, I told
Christabella.
He has equipped you fully for this sister. Go to the world
and unleash what has been given to you. The previous
months have been periods of training and preparation for
you. I am so happy that you took every step so seriously.
We are always here to lend our voice and our prayers are
with you. Don’t forget that Joanna, Christabella reassured.
Every day that passes by, I realize more that living a sincere
life is a powerful evangelical tool. Thank you for showing
me genuine love, I said to her.
While we were discussing, I got a call from Maxwell. I
picked up and waited to hear what he had to say.
Hello Joanna, he said.
Don’t ever stop believing in your God. He loves you so
much. He cares for you beyond your Imagination and wants
nothing to ever hurt you. I have never seen any God that is
so committed to his people as your God even after all your
messes.
He is a good God. Please pray for me. I want to serve your
God. Can He still Love me? Can He still accept me,
because I have been loyal to a wicked god for many years?
Many admire my affluence but they don’t know I was
being used. It looks like I live and have the best life but
daily I drown in fear and restlessness.
Is there hope for me, Joanna? Maxwell said crying bitterly.
I too was crying alongside. My tears couldn’t even let me
say a word.
Let’s meet at the school chapel by 3 pm, I finally said and
hung up.
Oh, God is too merciful. His ways are not the ways of men.
Only God has a man's life all figured out. Who would have
thought? Chai! Faithful God, I exclaimed.

CHAPTER 13
Maxwell narrated how he became a captive to the enemy.
It was just a night of pleasure with a lady he met during one
of the award nights in the school. After a series of sexual
intercourse with the young lady, he slept off and found
himself summoned to a strange place and surrounded by
young boys and girls.
According to him, he was startled when he finally woke up.
He asked those around him how he got there but received
no answer.
After a while, he was welcomed into the coven and was
given a mandate of sleeping with as many girls on campus
as possible. His mission was particularly to ruin the destiny
of young girls and leave them when it’s obvious they are
useless.
Every young girl Maxwell slept with gets addicted to
sleeping with him just like it happened to me.
My days with Maxwell weren’t good until God showed up
for me.
After narrating his story, I asked Maxwell why they wanted
the destiny of young people. He said, “When their destiny
is hijacked, the plans of God over their lives get terminated
and they can no longer be usable vessels for any Kingdom
Exploit. Rather, they will help to populate hell through
lifestyle and negative Influence, thereby depopulating the
kingdom of God”.
Oh! The devil is so strategic and committed to whatever he
is set to achieve but the love of God conquered and set
many free. Thank God I am Free! I’m going back to be
that vessel the enemy is afraid that I would become, I said
out loud.
I encouraged Maxwell that whatever fears the enemy has
instilled in him by telling him lies will die off the moment
he accepts and believe that God will reign supreme in his
life.
Let Him know that he is just a liar and His working in your
life has been disconnected by the power in the name of
Jesus, I continued.
I Prayed for Maxwell, invited him to church, and
introduced him to brothers that will take him by hand and
unveil Christ to Him.
I created a page on Facebook where I published words as
God laid them in my Heart. Many miracles and testimonies
sprang up from my online evangelism. I continued both
Online and Offline; fishing men for Christ.
Few of my old friends joined me and experienced the
power of God in their lives.
At first, they wondered what was wrong with me, but I kept
talking to them and posting on all my social media handles
how overwhelming God's love is.
Truly, the love of God is a must experience for every soul.
A relationship with God is worth building with all sincerity
of heart.
I have always prayed for Zikora to realize who she really is
in Christ, and how the life she lives now is nothing near
what God wants for Her.
The devil is a stealer of destiny, he roams about looking for
whom to devour, no wonder he pays more attention to the
younger ones just so that he can steal their lives and give
them a messy glittering life in exchange.
Zikora chatted me up and dropped a very long note for me.
It was all about her life in the past years. She was trapped,
she wrote that she was tired of the kind of life she wanted
as a young girl and wanted a way out.
According to her, she didn’t know what pushed her to do
the things she did even when she was determined to stop.
Whenever she plans to stop, she often heard voices that
persuade her to continue.
I’m being controlled by the evil spirit, she lamented.
I couldn’t explain it, but I was very excited at that point. I
was happy that finally Zikora was being saved from her
lifestyle. This is the beginning of a new dawn, I said loudly.
I explained to Zikora that she was still a captive of that
spirit because she haven’t accepted the love of Christ (the
finished work of Christ) and submitted only to the authority
of Jesus.
We replicate what we submit to, if you submit to Christ,
you are bound by all means to exude only the life of your
master. That way, the shackle and desires of the flesh will
die off.
I followed her up and encouraged her to read at least 5-10
verses of the scripture daily because the word is power. I
didn’t stop either, I continued praying to God for total
recovery.
God has a way of replenishing all that we lost. God’s mercy
is a must experience for every soul, I said.

CHAPTER 14
Zikora found it difficult to forgive herself for her past
lifestyle. Her mind was in a deep mess. It wasn’t just a
journey to repentance for her but a battle of freedom from
guilt and a renewed mindset. Zikora came from a home
where the father tortures the mother even though he is a
pastor. She grew up thinking that it was normal to do just
anything and still pretend to be a vibrant Christian.
I didn’t know she had an abusive father until she opened up
to me.
She said, “Joanna you know, one of the reasons I didn’t
care about Christianity was because I felt many Christians
out there were hypocrites. Instead of being a good
Christian, I showed the world the Zikora they wanted to
see.
My father who preached righteousness all the time to his
members wasn’t who people thought he was. I blame my
mum for always covering him up even with all the torture
she receives from him.
He beats and rebukes her at every slightest mistake. He is
so impatient and unloving, how then was I supposed to
believe that the God he is serving is better off? Zikora said,
with tears in her eyes.
I couldn’t place my hand on lots of things then and so, I
wasn’t able to tell anyone about it. All I wanted was the
freedom to live and enjoy my life. I knew it was wrong
but I thought it was the best decision for me, she said while
crying bitterly.
I haven’t seen Zikora in that state before. She was so
broken and bothered. I could sense the guilt she felt. She
needed to forgive herself and her parents. Her mind is also
in a bad condition and needed healing and transformation.
I gave Zikora a warm hug and assured her that she will be
fine even though she has made a series of mistakes like
myself. I told her not to remain in the mess.
You are not your mistake Zikora, I said. There is who God
said you are, and that is who you are, nothing else matters
right now except that you have realized yourself and you
are ready to walk into the you God foreordained.
You are not going to go through this phase alone, God is
very much on your side and he is ever willing to take you
by your hand. And I’m also here, to walk through this path
with you, I reassured her.
I got books on forgiveness, mind shift, healing from past
life mistakes, and also, books on the Holy Spirit for Zikora
to help her gain all the knowledge she needed for her
present phase. She needed to decongest and flush out all the
old mindsets and perceptions she had.
Gradually, Zikora began to understand what it means to
have an intimate relationship with Christ. Her quest
Increased, and her mind gradually transformed. She glowed
differently and would always share her new experiences
with her friends.

CHAPTER 15
Gradually, I became really popular on campus. I was
radical with evangelism; the thought of what Maxwell
revealed to me wouldn’t let me keep calm and let the devil
have more souls.
I got more serious with my academics and God was so
kind, I didn’t fail more courses. I only had an extra
semester to clear all outstanding papers.
The extra semester was the longest semester of my life, as
many of my course mates were no longer around the school
environment. I only managed to cope, though I didn’t let it
affect the work of God that I was doing, my zeal waxed
even stronger.
On a faithful day, the course representative of a particular
course I did in my 300l sent me a text stating that the
lecturer wanted to speak with me.
What could that be? I thought to myself. Lord, please go
ahead of me. My ears are only ready to receive great news,
I said.
I left for the lecturer's office when I got there, all of a
sudden I began to hear whispers from within me. I kept
hearing, “He is the one, He is the One”.
At first, I was really confused, the one that did what
exactly? I asked myself.
The husband of your youth, I heard again.
Not again, Joanna, I said. Listen, don’t deceive yourself,
you are not entering into any mess again, I continued.
I composed myself immediately and greeted the lecturer.
Good day, sir. You sent for me, I said.
Are you Joanna Samuel? He asked and I said yes. He asked
if I registered for his course and I said yes.
Well, I just discovered you have already written and passed
it. So why do you want to write it again? He asked.
I had a missing result, and the lecturer that was here refused
to give me any attention, he just said I should rewrite it, I
explained.
You are not rewriting anything, everything will be sorted
out, he told me and asked me to write my name in full
alongside other details, including my phone number.
I did and appreciated him. I left his office feeling so
relieved and happy.
God is perfect and He does not fail, I said while walking
back to the secretariat.
The intervention of Mr. Reuben made other things easy. He
was so committed to helping me and sometimes he called
to check up on me.
All the while we talked, he never mentioned anything to
confirm what I heard at his office, though he always said he
wanted us to talk about something. But we always ended up
talking about things whenever he called.
I waited for him to say what he wanted to say but each
time, he end up telling me that he loved talking to me. He
said he felt peace and satisfaction whenever he does.
I actually felt more of that about him, but I was worried
that Reuben might not be interested in marrying me. I kept
praying for God to help, as I was in a state of confusion.
I had several suitors at that time but didn’t feel good about
a few of them. There were some that I wanted to give a
chance. Whenever I try to give them the chance, I feel
restricted by God. I continued praying and seeking God's
Intervention. All I could hear from God at that time was,
“Be patient daughter, for I am the author and finisher of
your faith, whatever I have begun in your life I will bring it
to pass”.
God wanted me to be patient, even though I felt delayed
and pressured. I decided to wait on God.
I kept praying for Reuben, and my marriage regardless.
One day, God opened my eyes and I saw Reuben stalk on
sinking ground. He stretched his hand and cried for help
but no one could hear him. I came closer and beckoned on
an angel close to him to help him out and Reuben was
rescued.
After the vision, I prayed that God should deliver Reuben
from every challenge that he might be having. That became
a prayer point that I dwelt on daily.

My heart was already getting weary of waiting for Reuben

as different calibers of men kept knocking on my side. I
was beginning to give it a second thought even though I
still prayed for him.
Maybe it was just me crushing on him, I said to myself.
After a while, I began to speak with one of my suitors
whom I felt captured my heart. He was only waiting for my
approval before proceeding to meet my parents, and the big
yes was indeed a very heavy one in my mouth.
The fear of being with the wrong man even after hearing
from God was intense.
But what if Reuben decides to marry another lady, I will be
at loss completely, I said to myself. Maybe I should just tell
Reuben that there is a guy I have been considering
accepting just to hear what he had to say, I thought.
The plan looked like a good one and I was determined to
follow through regardless.
I scheduled a date with Reuben. On that day, I left to meet
with him, and just when I alighted from the taxi that
brought me to the venue, my phone rang and it was a call
from Reuben.
Hello Joanna! I am at the venue but can’t see you anywhere
around, he said.
I just dropped off in front of the venue now, I will be inside
soon, I replied.
My heart beat even faster, as I sat face to face with Reuben,
ready to spill my story.
I knew that Reuben loved and valued me so much but I
haven’t been able to place my hand on why he is yet to
propose to me.
I didn’t let Reuben know how I felt, I engaged him in
random discussion and was waiting for the right time to
bring up the discussion. While we chilled with well-
prepared parfait milk.
Joanna, I love you. I love you so much, and I want you to
be the best part of my life, Reuben said in between our
discussions as he knelt to propose to me with a ring.
My eyes popped open. I was so shocked, I couldn’t believe
what just happened. I flanked my hand and screamed I love
you too Reuben and I accept to spend the rest of my life
with you.
Reuben slipped the ring on my third finger and gave me the
warmest and most peace-assuring hug ever.
The satisfaction, peace and joy I felt within me were
overwhelming.
Thank God I didn’t miss you as I always see myself cry out
loud in my dream for being late to propose to you, he said.
On two occasions, I came when another person is
proposing. I have been asking God to liberate me from the
wrong relationship I put myself in.
Severally my ex has threatened to kill herself if I dare to
leave her, it was the most draining phase of my life, she
really dealt with me in so many different ways.
At some point, I wanted to just accept that it was my fate
because we had a blood covenant but to God be the glory. 2
weeks ago, she came begging that we should break the
bond as she no longer wants me and sent me her wedding
card three days ago. Finally, I am free to be with my own
God’s choicest gift, he narrated.
Wow, Reuben! God is perfect. He does not fail and cannot
lie. His words are true and He is a great deliverer. Very
merciful and steadfast with his love. The best decision I
have made is to be intentional in walking with God, I
replied.