Swinggcat: Really good… but I don’t think it’s suited for my place.

I think
you really need to come over and see it.

Milk Jugs: Let me get your number.

Swinggcat: Why don’t you come over now.

Milk Jugs: I don’t know if that’s appropriate, I have a boyfriend.

Swinggcat: Good… he can cook us breakfast in bed… but if the orange

juice isn’t fresh, I’m gonna club him.

Milk Jugs: (giggles) Um… I really shouldn’t… he’d get mad…. He’s kinda
weird about that stuff. I know you’re safe and aren’t gonna do anything
but…

Swinggcat: ( I interrupt her with) I was gonna show you my place, but
now that you’re being all weird about it, I’ll just get someone else to do
the painting… nice meeting you… bye. (Then I starting walking away.)

Milk Jugs: Wait… come back here.

Swinggcat: Are you coming?

Mild Jugs: Um… you live close by, right?

Swinggcat: Right around the block.

We walk off the campus. Then for a couple blocks.

Milk Jugs: Are we almost there?

Swinggcat: Almost.

Then we get to my car.

Milk Jugs: Wait… I thought you said you live around the block?

Swinggcat: I do. I’m just lazy. So I drove.

She gets in. We drive to my loft. She walks in. I show her where I want
her to paint the picture. We go over ideas. Then I get her a alcoholic
beverage. We go up to my patio to talk.

Milk Jugs: How old are you?

Swinggcat: (I was 30 at the time.) I’m 30. You?

Milk Jugs: I’m only 19. Wow, you’re so much older than me. You could
almost be my dad. You were probably cute when you were younger.

Swinggcat: Actually you’re older than me. Because in girl years, you’re
57.
Milk Jugs: Um… no… are you on crack?

Swinggcat: If you look at models, they peak at around 17. By 18 they’re

over the hill. By your age, you practically need a walker. But I’ll make an
exception and be with an older woman. C’mon. Give your grandson a
hug.

I put out my arms for her to hug me. She hugs me back. I start rubbing
my lips on her ear. She’s into it. So I start biting her neck. Then I start
making out with her. Then I Push her away.

Swinggcat: Ew… you tried to kiss your grandson.

Milk Jugs: You kissed me.

Swinggcat: Why would I want to kiss a grandma?

Milk Jugs: ‘cause you like kissing me.

She tries to kiss me. I kiss her back and then Push her away.

Swinggcat: Mm… maybe. You are kinda hot for an older woman. Let me
give you a tour of the rest of my place. (I take her hand and lead her to
my bedroom.)

Milk Jugs: I like your bed.

Swinggcat: Yeah… I have a special cuddle mattress. Try it out.

Milk Jugs: (she interrupts) but I have a…

Swinggcat: (I cut her off) But no funny business. As I told you, I love
cuddling but it’s a nonsexual thing. It’s all about the human connection. (I
pat the bed with my hand.) Here, try it out.

She lies down. At first we just lay there. Then I start spooning her. Then I
start kissing her ear. She’s receptive. So I start rubbing her ass.

Swinggcat: (I whisper into her ear) Feeling your ass is turning me on so

much. Your ass is making my cock hard.

She opens her legs and I start fingering her. She’s getting into it.

Milk Jugs: I just want to let you know we aren’t having sex.

Swinggcat: I don’t believe you.

Milk Jugs: No… really… we are not having sex.

Swinggcat: You don’t even believe you.

Milk Jugs: : Ummm… (proceeded by giggles.)

Then we made monkey love.

Important note: she tested me and put up token barriers numerous times
throughout the interaction. I diffused each one with a reframe.

Field Report # 3: 15 Minutes To Doing A Catholic Schoolgirl:

Sometimes it only takes a few short minutes to close the deal. Here’s an
example of that.

As I’m walking out of a Hollywood nightclub, my eyeballs glue onto a

short brunette sporting Frankie B jeans, a wife beater, and a body I could
only miss on days that end with Y. A red, plaid schoolgirl tie ropes
around her neck, tattoos ornament her arms, and a diamond stud pokes
through the same place Marilyn Monroe had her mole. She and her friend
are walking past me.

Swinggcat: (I get eye contact with both girls.) Hiii!

Girls: Hiii!!!

I high-five both girls, spin them around at the same time, and then Pull
them into me. One is flanked to my right, the other, my left.

Swinggcat: What makes you guys good cuddle buddies?

Her Friend: ‘Cause we’re the bestest cuddle buddies ever.

Swinggcat: Let’s find out (I hug both of them.)

Swinggcat: That was good. But you guys can do better (I hug them
again.)

Swinggcat: That was great. You guys are now in the cuddle buddy club.

Girls: Yay!!!

Her friend’s hug was firmer, letting me know that she’s more receptive.

Swinggcat: (I turn to her friend) If you were in kissing school, what grade
would your kissing teacher give you?

Her Friend: An A, for sure.

Swinggcat: Let’s find out. (I kiss her.)

Her Friend: How was that?

Swinggcat: I give it an A- just because there was too much talking.

Her Friend: C’mon. That was so an A.

Swinggcat: (I turn my attention to the schoolgirl.) And how ‘bout you?

School Girl: I’m not kissing you. You just kissed my friend.

Swinggcat: In the cuddle club we don’t have jealousy. If you don’t know
how to kiss, that’s okay. Speak up.

Schoolgirl: Oh… I know how kiss.

I turn my attention away from her.

Schoolgirl: (She grabs me and kisses me) See.

Swinggcat: I don’t know. You guys are pretty even. Let’s see what would
happen if you joined forces and worked together. (Then I kiss both girls
at the same time.)

Schoolgirl: Oh my God… that was crazy.

(My friend comes and whisks her friend off – thank God.)

Schoolgirl: Do you pull this scam on all the girls.

Swinggcat: Only Catholic schoolgirls who dish out attitude.

Schoolgirl: I’m not giving you attitude. You’re just very forward.

Swinggcat: Well then… maybe you can’t handle me.

Schoolgirl: Maybe you can’t handle me.

Swinggcat: You know what the problem is…

Schoolgirl: What?

Swinggcat: We’re too similar. I admit it. I’ve finally met my match. Let’s
call a truce. (I stick out my arms for a hug. And then whisper into her.)
And that’s exactly why you and could never be friends.

Schoolgirl: I like your cocky attitude. It’s cute.

Swinggcat: You are very sarcastic.

Schoolgirl: Me sarcastic?! How ‘bout you?

Swinggcat: No… you’re right. I’m the same way. (Then I spin her around.
Bring her in close and put my lips up to her ear and whisper) And if we
hung out, we’d have the best time making fun of everyone at their
expense, but then we’d be Karmically tainted… so we should never hang
out. (I Push her away.)

Schoolgirl: Why are you pushing me away, cuddle buddy.

Swinggcat: Oh… I almost forgot… you’re my cuddle buddy. Come here

cuddle buddy (I put out my arms to hug her again .)
She hugs me.

Swinggcat: (I rub my lips against her ear and whisper) You’re a very
pretty girl. But that isn’t good enough for me. There are lots of pretty girls
in this town. What do you have going for you besides your looks?

Schoolgirl: I dunno. I’m in a band. I’m a singer.

Swinggcat: Let’s hear something.

Schoolgirl: Right here?

Swinggcat: Yeah… right here. Let’s hear it.

She starts swinging the “Star-Spangled Banner.

Swinggcat: That was amazing! (I grab her and start kissing her.)

We start kissing hard. I move my hands through the back of her hair and
firmly grab a handful at the base. Then I grab her ass.

Swinggcat: Oh my God. You’re making cock so hard. (I put her hand on

it.)

Schoolgirl: (She giggles and then trips and falls.)

I fall with her. We start making out on the ground. I rub her legs and ass.
She get more turned on.

Swinggcat: Take off your pants.

Schoolgirl: Take off my pants?

Swinggcat: Yeah… take off your pants.

Schoolgirl: Okay. (She removes her pants.)

Then I slide my battle sword into her vajayjay.

I’m a little paranoid about police and there’s a lot of people walking by.
So I pick her up off the floor. But I cannot contain myself. So I prop her
up against a wall and we start going at it again. Male passersby are high-
fiving me as I’m taking care of business.

If you have a question or story for me, please pop me an email at:
swinggcatsuccessstory@yahoo.com.

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