1

CHAPTER ONE

INTRODUCTION

1.1 Background of the Study

The pastor’s wife is an important personality in the pastoral ministry. This is in line with the

notion of a wife, especially if that person is or is to be a leader. The pastor’s wife makes the

pastor’s ministry complete. A woman’s place in the life of a man is very important as the

Bible states that; “the Lord God said, it is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a

helper suitable for him” (Genesis 2:18, NIV). Thus, the pastor’s wife is a suitable helper to

the pastor. She is a valuable assistance to the pastor. It means that the pastor’s wife knows the

pastor and his goal and is available to assist the pastor achieve his set goal.

It is of note that the pastor’s wife is in the first place a believer in Christ with the knowledge

of God and strong believes in the Holy Scriptures (The Bible) she is a person of noble

character and is teachable. She is also someone who takes personal responsibility in the

training of her children in the fear of the Lord. Susanna Wesley was a pastor’s wife. She

trained her ten (10) children in the way of the Lord. She stated that; “the children of this

family were taught, as soon as they can speak, the Lord’s prayer, which they were made to

say at rising and bedtime constantly… when the Wesley children were a little older, the day

began with reading or saying a psalm, reading an Old Testament chapter, and saying private

prayers – all before breakfast. At the end of school day, they paired up to read a psalm and a

New Testament chapter (lovino, https://www.umc.org). two of the children, John and Charles

were the founders of Worldwide Methodist Church.

In the Church of Christ in Nations (COCIN), there are many departinents; Youth, Finance,

Women Fellowship, Church Growth, and Evangelism and Missions. The women Fellowship
 2

is geared towards equipping women in faith. This ministry (women fellowship) becomes an

important area in which the pastor’s wife is to function. This is in line with the fact that the

pastor’s wife is to be an adviser to the women fellowship.

The Regional Church Council Gigiring is an obedient council to the General Church Council

(GCCN) and thus, live within the provision of the church. In line with the provision of the

church (COCIN), Regional Church Council Gigiring regards the pastor’s wife as an adviser

to the Women Fellowship. The COCIN Bye-Laws state thats: “pastor’s wives shall be

counselors and advisers to the women fellowship and other groups at she different of the

church in general”, (43).

In the discharge of their functions as advisers in the women fellowships, the pastor’s wives

have faced serious challenges. One of the major challenges is that the women fellowship is

not bond by the advice the pastor’s wife give. In fact, this made the pastor’s wife an object of

ridicule as she may be obeyed. It is pathetic that at times the women leader have collusion

with the pastor’s wife based on the advice the pastor’s wife put forth.

This study becomes very necessary in the light of the challenges faced by the pastor’s wife.

The is aimed at unveiling the many challenges she faced and make necessary

recommendations among which is that the pastor’s wife should be educationally and

theologically sound and up-to-date to command respect and obedient. These

recommendations if considered by the church (COCIN) will make the pastor’s wife enjoy her

work as a pastor’s wife in the church especially in the Regional Church Council, Gigiring.

1.2 Statement of the Problem

The problem of this study is that though the constitution of the church made a provision that

the pastor’s wife is to be a counselor and adviser to the women fellowship, It did not go to
 3

state constitutionally the functions of the pastor’s wife as an adviser. A mention is different

from a constitutional back-up, perhaps, this is why the voice of the pastor’s wife may be

heard by the women fellowship and thus, at times bring collusion. Interaction among the

pastor’s wives within the Gigiring Regional Church Council has proved this serious problem.

1.3 Research Questions

The following questions are considered very relevant to carry out this study;

1. What is the place of the pastor’s wife in Church of Christ in Nations (COCIN)?

2. What is the understanding of the pastor’s wife as an adviser in the women fellowship?

3. What are the challenges faced by the pastor’s wife as an adviser to the women

fellowship?

4. How can the problems faced by the pastor’s wife as an adviser to the women

fellowship overcome?

1.4 Aims of the Study

The main aim of this study is to show the place of the pastor’s wife as an adviser in COCIN

women fellowship in Regional Church (RCC) Gigiring.

The specific objectives include;

1. To make known who a pastor’s wife is

2. To show the roles of the pastor’s wife

3. To identify the challenges faced by the pastor’s wife as an adviser to the women

fellowship in COCIN RCC Gigiring.

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4. To proffer appropriate responses to the challenges faced by the pastor’s wife as

adviser to the women fellowship.

1.5 Significance of the Study

This study is considered very important to the Church (COCIN) especially RCC Gigiring,

leaders and members of the women fellowship, pastors in COCIN especially RCC Gigiring,

Researcher and Scholars, pastor’s wives and the researcher.

1.6 Scope of the Study

The study concentrates and is centered on the role of the pastor’s wife as an adviser in

Women Fellowship in the Regional Church Council (RCC), Gigiring. COCIN, RCC Gigiring

has 13 LCCs. However, this study focused on five (5) LCCS, VIZ, Mado, Gold & Base,

Abbattoin Hwolshe Gigiring and Tudum Wada.

1.7 Methodology

This research employed both qualitative and quantitative methods to collect data in respect to

the subject matter,THE PLACE OF A PASTOR’S WIFE AS AN ADVISER TO COCIN

WOMEN FELLOWSHIP, RCC GIGIRING.

Qualitative research method is concerned with providing a depth of understanding of the

subject which the researcher investigate rather than measuring the level of occurrence (Smith

and Larkin, 2009:23). Thus, “the knowledge gained through qualitative investigations is more

informative, richer and offers enhanced understandings compared to that which can be

obtained (statistically) through quantitative research” (Tewksbury, 38). According to

Reynolds (2013:15), “Qualitative research also allows for new theological integrations that

can help the researcher to go beyond initial preconception and framework.”

 5

Quantitative methods on the other hand, emphasize objective measurements and the

statistical, mathematical, or numerical analysis of data collected through polls, questionnaire,

and surveys, or by manipulating pre-existing statistical data using computation techniques

(Babbie, 1992:1), Qualitative research focuses on gathering numerical data and generalizing

it across groups of people or to explain a particular phenomenon (Babbie, 1).

The main goal in conducting qualitative research study is to determine the relationship

between one thing (an independent variable) and another (a dependable or outcome variable)

within a population (Babbie, 2010:1; McNabb 2008:1, Brains, 22011:2)

While qualitative research uses unstructured and semi-structured questionnaire and

interviews, quantitative method uses structured questionnaire (Saunders et.al, 2009:245).

These two fit perfectly into this research and informed the researcher’s choice and

combination of these two methods.

1.7 Definition of Terms

The following terms are hereby clarified as used in this work;

Adviser:-This is someone that gives counsel

Pastor’s Wife:- This is a woman married to a pastor

Women Fellowship:- It is the coming together of women in a particular denomination like

Church of Christ in Nations (COCIN) to share things together in respect to spiritual, physical,

social and emotional development.

COCIN:- This is a church denomination which full meaning is Church of Christ in Nations
 6

RCC:- This stands for Regional Church Council

Gigiring:- This is the location of the Regional Church Council in this study.

CHAPTER TWO

LITERATURE REVIEW

A wiferefers to a woman who is married to a man. Thus, a woman becomes awife through a

process of marriage. Marriage is a heart bound issue. The husbandis to be intensely and

intimately related to his wife both physically,psychologically and spiritually. This is so

because they complement and completeeach other in life. From creation the woman was the

glory of man. She was createdfrom him and for him, (Kore; 2002:9). Thus, marriage is

between a woman andman (male and female) not homosexual man and man, and not

lesbianismwoman to woman.

A pastor wife is a woman who is married to a pastor. The term "Pastor's wife" or"minster's

wife" refers to a woman who is the wife of a pastor. She is first and foremost a woman
 7

married to a pastor, and raising a family with her husband who is a pastor. Some pastors"

wives may be young in age and in marriage, while someare older and have been married for a

short time or over thirty to fifty years andstill serving in the ministry (Paiya; 2019:1). A

Pastor's wife is a woman married toa man called by God into the ministry of the gospel and

also called to be her husband’s helper, (Ajayi and Dorcas; 2016:1).

It is very important to note that a pastor's wife is a person, very human likeeveryone else. She

is a Christian, one who has received Jesus as her Lord andSaviour and walk with Christ

alongside her husband. In the home front she is theassistant pastor, in the church she is the

mother of the church, especially thewomen, (Dashan; 2014:3). He further stated that; "Being

born again is seen in herbehavior, words and lifestyle. She is industrious and is not a church

parasite butone who works with her own hands. She is creative and possesses the qualities

ofthe proverbial woman: Her husband trusts her. He is respected because of her" (3).

Lami Gotom made it simpler to understand who a pastor wife is as she assertedthat;

A pastor's wife is a woman who has accepted Jesus Christ to be

her personalsavior and Lord and is married to a pastor who is

called by God into Hisministry. She is his wife and he is her

husband. She is his friend and she is the onethe Lord has culled

to work in his vineyard with the pastor. The wife of the pastoris a

co-worker with the pastor in the vineyard of the Lord, she is the

pastorshelper (Gen. 2:18). She is the pastor's first personal

consultant and adviser. She isa woman who loves the Lord and is

willing to serve Him along with her pastor-husband through her

service to humanity in order to bring many people to theLord

(Gotom, 2009:88).
 8

It is important to note that a pastor's wife is onewith the pastor. Even though shemight not

have heard the voice to be in the ministry. her acceptance to be with thepastor as her husband

means she is in the ministry with him. It implies that theyagreed to be together in all things;

"Do two walk together unless they have agreedto do so" (Amos 3:3, NIV). The woman who

marries a clergy man should have adefinitive call, or inner urge by which she knows that she

is a help mate in theservice with the minister (pastor). Her inner desire through the years to be

apastor's wife now becomes a strong call that nothing could shake, (Harrison:1964:214).

The position is clear, a pastor's wife may not be the arrowhead but she assists.Every pastor's

wife may not be called to stand on the pulpit or take leadershipposition, but every pastor's

wife is called to stand with her husband. They may notdo the same work but as a fitting

helper, a suitable companion, she shares thepastoral burden, problems, suffering, stress,

tension, shame, criticism, disgrace.persecution, frustration, and poverty involved in pastoral

ministry as well ashonour, respect and care befitting the reward of pastoral ministry together

with herhusband (Dali, 2006:33).

The effectiveness and efficiency of the pastoral ministry entails the couple (pastorand his

wife) walking and working together. The pastor and his wife need eachother in the ministry

as much as they need each other at home. They can do manythings together depending on

their gifting, such as preaching, administrationoverseeing the church and leading worship.

She in particular can minister toWomen and coordinate children's programme. Pastors and

their wives arelabourers together in God's vineyard (Gotom, 91).

Pastors wives are ordinary women like any other women we might know or come across but

who majorly and primarily find their identity in their local congregation. They are daughters

of god, loved by Christ and led by Holy Spirit (Thomas, 2018).

The following are some of the definition of a pastor’s wife as put forth by Helen Oyekanmi;
 9

i. Pastors’ wives are women filled with unspeakable pain, at times they are lovely

and full of unreasonable expectations from the congregation especially when it

comes to their needs.

ii. Pastor’s wives are women who usually isolated themselves from outside world

because of the fear of pollution and what people will say about them.

iii. Pastors’ wives are set of women who cannot take decision of their own God on

their families or themselves without consideration for their husband status, his

work, and they church. The struggle about what the members will say, so they are

tensed in decision making. Only their husbands can help them. Most pastors wives

did not ever prepared to be pastors wives. They just simply married a husband by

his first name Ishaya, Gideon, James, Luka, not with the title ‘pastor’. Yet in the

ministry contexts, there are implicit expectations placed on each pastor’s wife.She

fulfill this position assignment therefore, it calls for a re-orientation of identity.

iv. Pastors’ wives are the major carriers of trials and temptation facing their

husbands.

v. Hurts of various kinds from church members insult when things are not going on

well or the pastors seem not to meet their expectations. Maintenance of high moral

tone cultured principles, and stayed well respected.

vi. Pastors’ wives sustain themselves as channels of blessings to their families and

church members.

vii. They never complain or put on bad countenance for no reason.

viii. Experiencing emotional trauma when financial status is little or nothing to write

home about.

ix. They must take care of their husbands, children, extended family and church

members.
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x. Accept every assigned responsibility either easy or not

xi. Be exemplary in words and deeds

xii. Each one of the pastors wives must be 24/7 hours available for her husband and

the church using her potentials, gifting and interest to meet varied needs.

xiii. They depend on the benevolent of the members and must always be appreciative

of good or bad gestures.

xiv. Other include, no personal friends, enduring crisis situations without saying

anything, train their children to be model, endure emotional stress, sickness and

sometimes depression. They are vulnerable to all kinds of negativity and offences.

So they cannot make friends or be friends to anyone in and outside the church

(Mckeover, 2017:1).

The pastor's wife is someone in agreement with the pastor. You may have beenmarried before

your husband joined the ordained ministry. If that is the case, thenthere is no doubt that as

you as the wife consented to the call and if you did, then itwas a unanimous decision and as

such a co-operate responsibility. However, youmay have married your husband after he has

been ordained. In this case, acceptinghim as a husband means you also have given consent to

the duties assigned to himby God. Whichever is the case, it is most important to realize that

God has calledyou not only as a pastor's wife but also as his own child with specific

assignments.The pastor's wife is a representative of Christ and so joined her husband in

thenoble task of reconciling men and women to God. As the pastor shepherds God'speople,

similarly, the wife shepherds in the same vineyard, (Nwakit, 2010:5).

Qualities of a Pastor's Wife

The pastor's wife as the pastor is expected to have some characteristics featuresthat make her

unique amongst other women. Many scholars have given thecharacteristics of a pastor's wife
 11

which are not quite different from those of thepastor. Iwuagu (2001), Gotom (2009) and

many other scholars agreed that thefollowing are some of the characteristics of a pastor's

wife:

1. Love: The pastor's wife should love the Lord her God with all her heartembrace her

husband and love her neighbours especially members of thechurch.

2. Humility and loyalty: The pastor's wife should be humble and loyal toChrist, her husband

and the church. Such qualities are a pastor's wifecommands respect from the husband, church

members and the society.When a wife loves and humble, God can make available to her

anumber of spiritual gifts to assist her husband.

3. Faithful, Truthful and Honest: The wife of the pastor is expected to be areliable woman

who can be trusted by her husband, church members andthe society. It is indeed disastrous if

the wife of the pastor is unfaithful,dishonest and cannot speak the truth.

4. Peaceful and sober: Peace is another vital quality of the pastor's wife. Sheis expected not to

be quarrelsome or pugnacious the pastor's wife needs tobe sober in word and action.

5. Role Model: The pastor's wife is supposed to be an example: "A wife ofnoble character

who can find? She is worth for more than rubies. Herhusband lies full confidence in her and

lacks nothing of value. She bringshim good, not harm all the days of her life" (Proverbs

31:10-12, NIV).

6. Modest: A pastor's wife should also be modest in dressing and in her otherdemands. She is

supposed to show contentment in what her husband bringsand from the support by the

church.

7. The pastor's wife is expected to manifest the qualities of a pastor as earlierdiscussed in this

study.
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Roles of the Pastor's Wife

Many scholars have written about the roles of the pastor's wife from differentperspectives.

However, this considered the roles of the pastor's wife from theangle of Gotom (2009) and

Kechalla (2019). Thus, the roles of the pastor's wifeare looked into as; Her roles in her

husband, her roles to the church and her rolesto the society.

Roles of the Pastor's wife to her Husband

The responsibilities of the pastor's wife to her husband are very enormous. One isthat as the

pastor goes about ministering and attending to people, he too needssomeone to minister to

him. He may claim righteousness and spiritualitysignifying he is close to God, however, the

fact remains that he is flesh and blood.Thus, he needs someone he can be accountable to, and

the number one person is hiswife.

It is natural that there are times the pastor will become discourage (like Job whomthe wife

said that he should abuse God and die) and contemplate suicide at worseand at least

resignation. It is at this periods of intense pressure that his wife'sministry becomes effective it

is at this point that she demonstrates that she is apastor's pastor. "there is no one who can fit

the shoes of the pastor's wife whenthe pastor's moral has gone down. It is through her

ministry to the pastor that shecan restore him to himself" (Gotom: 94). A pastor's wife is

expected to take careof the pastor physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.

To her Children

The pastor's wife is to take proper care of her children physical (food, health,education,

security, clothing and fellowship).she is a disciple to her children:Condolleeza Rice's mother,

Angelena passed on a love of music, a legacy ofhigher education a sense of self-worth, and a
 13

bold religious faith to her daughter, who would one day serve as National Security Advisor to

President George W.Bush" (- 2005: 14), Sussanah Wesley taught her children. John and

Charles thepower of prayer, "the daughter and wife of strong Christian ministers, Albertce

encouraged Martin Luther King Jr’s strength of purpose in fighting racialinequality" (41);

Sonya Carson's belief that for son Ben need to aspire to higheracademic goals, she lifted him

out of the ghetto and into the medical field, Wherehe became a world-renowned pediatric

neurosurgeon" (49). All the women hereinmentioned were pastor's wives.

To the Church

The pastor's wife who is part and parcel of the pastor, function in many areas inthe church.

The pastor's wife can help make pastoral calls. The pastor's wife maynot accompany her

husband on all routine pastoral calls but there are certainoccasion that her presence is helpful

and necessary. These include visiting a newfamily in the church or when a pastor needs to

become acquainted with the womenand young people of the family or most importantly when

he calls on singlewomen or women who may have questionable motives in asking for him to

call.This serves to protect the pastor's reputation and keep the work of the ministryabove

reproach (Kachalla, 35).

It is most likely that the pastor's wife function among the women, girls andchildren in the

church. She is a teacher, leader, counselor, and adviser in thechurch especially within the

women.

To the Society.

Gotom (112) outlined the following as the pastor's wife responsibilities to thecommunity;

i. Spiritual Leader: The pastor's wife is looked upon as a spiritual leader.She is expected to

perform spiritual roles in the community. Forexample, if there is death in the community, it is

expected that she willgive words of comfort and encouragement from the word of God
 14

andalso pray with the bereaved - she is seen as a representative of God inthe community just

as the pastor represents God.

ii. In Visitation: It is expected that the pastor's wife move from house tohouse visiting the

community she visits members of her church.

CHAPTER THREE

COCIN WOMEN FELLOWSHIP AND THE PASTOR’S WIFE AS AN ADVISER.

3.1 Historical Background of COCIN Women Fellowship

The COCIN women fellowship has on originating point. In an interview with Rev. Seth

Ndem (The former General Secretary of COCIN), the COCIN women fellowing stated in

1932 at Kabwir. However, the general believed stands that the fellowship stated in 1942

under the leadership of Miss Bissie Barnie a foreign missionary under the Sundan United

Mission (S.U.M) (Francis 2018:11). Yossi Maton aptly captunely this as she stated that; “the

founder of COCIN Women Fellowship cannot be clearly established, but Miss Bissie Barnie

is often fondly associated strongly with it’s establishment and growth”…” (2005:12)

important point to note is that the Women Fellowship in COCIN came into existence through

the women missionaries who most of them were missionaries wives.

From the above, it is very clear that there is paucity of materials as to when the women

fellowship in the Church of Christ in Nations was actually started.

It is however, very important to point out that there are other sources that stated that the

COCIN women fellowship is a brain child of the “TarayerEkkilisiyar Kristi A Nijeriya”

(TEKAN). Maton (12) captured it thus, “ from wider perspective, the commencement of

CNOF is linked to the activities of women in “Tarayar Ekkilisiya Kristi A Nijeriya”

(TEKAN) and Sudan United Mission (SUM): This position collaborated by the higher bearer
 15

as cited by Maton (23) which stated that, “after 25 th February Conference, a special meeting

was organized for all native Christian women which gave birth to both TEKAN as well as

TEKAN Women Fellowship”

3.2 Place of Pastor’s Wife in COCIN

This research was able to look at the position of the pastor’s wife in COCIN before looking at

her role as an adviser to the women fellowship.

This is pertinent to state that COCIN as a denominational has no place for the pastor’s wife.

Infact, she is not recognized by the church because neither the constitution or Bye-laws of the

church has anything to do with. It is only the By-laws that states that, “Pastor’s wives shall be

counselors and advisers to the women fellowship and other groups at the different levels and

the church in general” (COCIN Bye-laws, 2013:43).

From the foregoing, the position of the pastor’s wife in the church is a good as non-existent.

Rev. William Ishifanus John (The Chairman, Regional Church Council, Gigiring). In an oral

interview states that: “The position is a weak position with no profound portfolio. Her advice

may or may not be accepted”.

This work gathered that the pastor’s wife is as important as the husband in the ministry of the

church. According to Esther Gokum (Assistant Women Leader, RCC Giginring), Mafeng

Yahnan, Palang Chuwang, Paulina Nyako (pastor’s wives in Giginring RCC), “the pastor’s

wife is a supporter to her husband.” Nanchi Japhalt, Vwi (Assistant Secretary COCIN

Women Fellowship RCC Gigiring) stated that: the pastor’s wife is to assist her husband.”

Other voices on the place of the pastor’s wife include; Rev. Pau Ganamu Mangkan, “A

pastor’s wifr is a co-worker and equally a pastor”, Rev. Dr. Stephen Hosea Vongdip (COCIN

Director of Personal), “A pastor’s wife is a pastor of her husband and colleague in the
 16

ministgry,” Mrs Lami Dakop (CWF Leader Gold and Baze), a pastor’s wife is a mummy to

everyone in the church,” Mrs. Deborah Malizo (Wife to COCIN General Secretary), “A

pastor’s wife is called together with her husband to serve God. She is a mother to the

church,” Rev. Seth Usman ndem (Former COCIN General Secretary), “he is an assistant to

her husband. Shepherd the flock with her husband,” Rev. Bulus Dung Tsok (COCIN

Director, Church Growth), “She is called to serve, married to a man that together they can

work in God’s vineyard.”

The above collections show that there is a missing gap in the constitution and Bye-laws of

COCIN that need to be filled. This is because the pastor’s wife is an indispensable and

integral part of the pastoral ministry. Some pastors wives lectured some pastors and some are

still lecturing in various seminaries especially Gindiri Theological Seminary. To ignore the

place of the pastor’s wife in the church could be a suicide mission. If the pastor’s wife is not

recognized and honoured by the instruments of the church, then, the pastor’s wife could be

as rag before any other person.

3.3 The Pastor’s Wife as an Adviser to CWF

The pastor’s wife in Church of Christ in Nations is considered as an adviser to the women

fellowship. The position of the pastor’s wife as an adviser to the women fellowship in

COCIN is what Mrs. Esther Gokum in an oral interview referred to as “Giring suggestion and

advice without authority.” Mrs. Plang Chuwang made this clearer by staking that, “Her role

as adviser is passive as her advice may be taken.” She could be understood that she is

considered an advicer but her advice is not in any binding on the women fellowship.

In another dimension, Vwi stated that the pastor’s wife as an adviser means “she is to guide

the activities of the COCIN women fellowship and advice where necessary.” In her words,
 17

Mrs. Deborah Malizo stated that “she pastor’s wife is an adviser and not to complete with the

CWF leader. She is to help them know the Lord, encourage them and groom the young ones.”

Another respondent made the very explicit by stating that; “the pastor’s wife as an adviser is

second in command to the CWF leader. She has no authority but to advice and her advice

may be considered.” In a contrary opinion, Rev. Bulus Dung Tsok stated that, “pastor’s wife

as adviser to the CWF as leader to the CWF.” Leader. She has no authority but to advice and

her advice may be considered.” In a contrary opinion, Rev. Bulus Dung Tsok stated that,

“pastor’s wife as adviser to the CWF as leader to the CWF.”

Rev. Stephen Hosea Vonydip in view ses the pastor’s wife as an adviser to mean “she is a

tutor in the CWF and there should be any gap between her and the CWF leader as she is

pastor the group”. In the same way, Rev. Paul Ganamu Mangkam state explicitly that, “I do

not accept that she is an adviser to the CWF. Let her be the head of the CWF at all levels.”

Mrs. Lami Dakop in a controversial way stated that, “She is better on the women side like a

leader though not all advice given by her may be taken by the CWF.”

She is important to note that the place of the pastor’s wife as an adviser to the CWF as

captured the Bye-laws is vagueand hence, subject or various interpretations. Rev. William

Istifanus John stated that, “ She is an adviser and thus inferior to the CWF leader. The church

considered her a common denominator who is not working side by side with her husband as

her roles are not enshrined in the constitution of the church.” It is for this cause that Dashan

(2) laid emphasis by stating that:

What is advising and what is the boundary of advising on administration? Is she an

administer? The answer is simply “No”. What is the meaning of advising? It just means

consultant, counselor, and advice giver. This advice giving may or may not be taken or
 18

rejected or kept in view (KIV). That does not mean disrespect. It just do not feel they can use

that advice at the time it was given.

3.4 Challenges Faced by the Pastor’s Wife

Unanimous in stating the following as some of the challenges faced by the pastor’s wives as

advisers to CWF in COCIN RCC Gingiring;

1. Her role is not clearly defined in the COCIN constitution and CWF handbook

2. Some lack leadership capabilities because of poor educational background

3. Clash with CWF Leader

4. Ethnicity, educational level and social status

5. Some are very proud

6. The spiritual life of some of the pastor’s wives is very low

7. She is considered second class,

8. The CWF leadership felt they are elected and can do without the pastor’s wife

9. Lack of cooperation from CWF leadership

The pastor's wife is confronted with many problems in functioning as a pastor'swife. The

following are some of the major challenges faced by the Pastor's wife:

i. Gender Bias

It is a reality that women in general terms are considered as second classcitizen and thus,

inferior. Across the world, women are treated unequallyand less value is placed on their lives

because of their gender. Women'sdifferential access to power and control of resources is

centered to thisdiscrimination in all institutional spheres, that is, the household,

marketcommunity, church, and state, (Reeves and Baden, 2000:7). It is anundeniable fact that
 19

women play certain irreplaceable roles in society, butquite often there unique roles are not

given adequate recognition andsometimes not acknowledged at all, (Abogunrin, 2003:1).

The conception of women in the Christian religion seems oppression.Prior to the nineteenth

century, male chauvinistic tendency permeated themissionary enterprise because many

people thought that only men werephysically qualified to engage in such pioneering task.

Some conservativereligious men even believe that it was forbidden for women to engage

inmission; thus, the prejudice about women had been with the church sincetime immemorial,

such treatment of women raises such question as towhether Christianity is oppressive to

women or not, (Mepaiyeda:2015:294).

Women do, of course, have a part to play in many religious (not peculiarto Christianity), but

it is almost always subordinate to the role of man..the major world religious have been if

anything even more maledominated. The way in which women are treated within their

religioustraditions has to be seen in the wider context of the almost universal phenomenon of

men being regarded as superior to women, (Holm.1994:xii - xiv).

There are some erroneous teachings based on traditions that have beenimported into the

church. Christian writers from Paul onwards used thisstory in two ways. First, it showed that

women are subordinate to mebecause they, are created alter men and from men and for men.

There is anatural hierarchy, to be male is the norm, the female half of the humanrace is other

and subordinate. The second way is which Christian writerscame to use this version of the

creation myth was to emphasize thefundamental wickedness of women. They are responsible

for leading menastray; if the woman had not tempted the man, he would not have

sinned(Drury, 1994:34).

The discrimination against women in the church and society in Nigeria isvery clear. Gender

relation in Nigeria is characterized by a lot ofimbalance to the disadvantage of women. This

 20

is the twenty-first centuryyet tradition, culture, religion, and other factors have continued to

widenthe disparity between a man and woman by keeping women in asubordinate position to

men. The larger society and the male sub-culturesstill see women and their aspirations as

subordinate resulting in a situationin which marginalization, trivialization and stereotyping of

women areglaring aspects of Nigeria today, (Patrick, 2010:106).

It is important to note that the Church aligned with the patriarch naturewomen are inferior,

second class citizen, subordinated and oppressed. Thechurch is all a man's domain and the

woman really do not have much to31say. They do a lot of work, they cook for picnics and

socials, and theyraise the most money... but when you get to policy, the men have it alltied

up. They do not want a woman in any kind of power, (Martin,1977:1-31).

The funny part of this gender imbalance in the church especially inNigeria is that women are

alınost more in number in all churches,sacrificial and yet not good enough to be

acknowledged. It is perhaps onlyin Christianity that women largely do actively dominate in

number, influence and commitment but mainly as worshippers while leadershiphas largely

remained the affair of men, (Alan, 2016:37).

Women are considered good for nothing. In fact, they are looked upon aspeople of no

valuable. The historical impression made of women in manyAfrican Novels, and especially in

male-authored texts, is that they are apeople completely devoid of logical thinking - a people

considered tohave a heart and some degree of beauty but to be totally benefit of soundbrains,

(Azuike, 2015:7).

All religious consider women as unequal and secondary beings to men. Itcan also be said that

religious scriptures contain both oppressive andliberative elements regarding women.

Defenders of their respectivereligious most often quote the liberative elements in defence and

excusethe oppressive elements, stating that one must see it in the light of thattime, and
 21

attempt to hide behind a façade of being spiritual. Others, thereare many who quote the

discriminative elements in religious to furtheroppress and legitimize the subordination of

women in society, therebystamping it with a spiritual favour, obtaining the approval of the

religiouselements in society. (Boje; 2003:41).

From the foregoing, patriarchy as practice in the church is a big challengeto the pastor's wife.

i. Salary

In most of the churches, the pastor's wife is a full time wife. She is not onsalary or any form

of allowance. There is no remuneration, no recognitionof pastor's wives' contribution to the

church. Sometimes there areaccusations that the pastor's wife does not welcome and treat

guests whocome to the pastor's house well. Sometimes the elders of the churchrestricts the

pastor's wife from advising the church and say it is herhusband they employed and not her

and so pastor's wives are sometimesstopped from full participation in the church work.

(Gotom, I19-120).

ii. No job specification.

In most of the churches, the pastor's wife is not on salary, hence, she hasno job description,

and church leaders have no defined role for in thechurch officially for her (Gotom, 118).

According to Ajayi and Dorcas (20l6:11-12), the following are some of thechallenges of a

pastor's wife in ministry;

i. She is expected to be more mature spiritually than the average women in the

church, that is why no matter her age, she is still called “our mother” – Mamanmu.

ii. She may tend to feel inferior and inadequate to stand before the literate and highly

educated members of the congregation.

 22

iii. Another challenge may also be how to manage the meager resources available to

the family.

iv. Loneliness because her husband is always preoccupied with members needs for

attention

v. Discouragement may sometimes come about if expected reward for labour in the

ministry is not coming

vi. The temptation to disrespect her seniors in the ministry either because of her age,

educational achievement or status is another challenge.

3.5 Response to Challenges Faced by the Pastor’s Wife

As earlier in this study, the pastor’s wife is a co-worker and partner with her husband in the

ministry to the church. For the pastor’s wife to perform in her duties effectively and

efficiently, the following are considered necessary steps to be taken by the church.

i. Constitutional recognition of the functions of the pastor’s wife.

This is an important step taken by the church in the constitution that the pastor’s wife

is to be a “counselor and adviser” to the women fellowship and other groups. She is

also very good that in the policy statement of the church a pastor without a wife

cannot be assigned a church or ordained. In fact, a pastor cannot be ordained without

the consent of the wife. However, the functions and roles of the pastor’s wife as an

adviser to the women fellowship are not stated. This study considers the constitutional

identification of the roles of the pastor’s wife as an adviser to the women fellowship

expedient.

ii. Break down of walls of Gender Bias.

 23

God created man and women to exist as male and female, and husband and wife(Genesis

1:26-27). This means, the man and woman are made equal though withdifferent roles and

functions. Matthew Henry states that;

The woman was made of rib out of the side of Adam, not made

out of his head torule over him, not made of his feet to be

trampled upon by him, but out of his sideto be equal with him,

under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be

loved(Henry; 2014:8).

The book of Genesis s put it very clear that man and woman are to complementeach other;

thus; "The Lord God said it is not good for the man to be alone. I willmake a helper suitable

for him" (Genesis 2:18, NIV).

John Stott commented thus;

Because men and women are equal (by creation and in Christ),

there can be noquestion of the inferiority of either to the other.

But because they arecomplementary, there can be no question

of the identity of one with the otherFurther, this double truth

allows light on male-female relationships and roles.Because

they have been created by God with equal dignity, men and

women mustrespect, love, serve and not despise one another.

Because they have been createdcomplementary to each other,

men and women must recognize their differencesand not try to

eliminate them or usurp one another's distinctive, (Stot,;

1984:243).
 24

To show that God created man and woman to be equal, Horton (2006: 162) statesthat;

Human beings were created by God as male and female (Genesis 1:27). Meaningthat what is

said generally of humanity must be said of both he male and thefemale, and that the truest

picture of what it means to be human is to be found inthe context of man and woman

together. The commands to multiply and exercisesovereignty over the earth were given to

both sexes as shared responsibility.

It is then necessary for the Church to break gender walls in the church to enablethe pastor's

wife to perform just as the popular saying has it that, "what a man cando, a woman can do

even better."

iii. The pastor's wife should study-improve herself educationally.

The pastor's wife should be a person who is always studying. The Bible statesthat, "study to

shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to beashamed, rightly dividing

the word of truth" (2 Timothy 2:15, KJV). A pastor'swife should not feel too old to learn.

iv. A pastor's wife should be a tent-maker

Aquila and Priscilla as earlier seen in this study were tent makers and so promotedthe

preaching of the gospel. A pastor's wife should not depend on the stipendsfrom the church

but should be industrious to support the husband and the ministry.

The Bible states that;

A wife of noble character who can find, she is worth more than rubies. Herhusband has full

confidence in her and lacks nothing of value she brings him good.not harm all the days of his

life she selects wool and flax and works with eagerhands. She is like the merchant ships,
 25

bringing her food from a far ... she watchesthe affair at her household and does not eat the

bread of idleness. Her childrenarise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises

her ... Give her thereward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

(Proverbs 31:10-31, NIV).

Helen Oyekanmi (108-109) stated the following as means through which the pastor’s wife

will overcome the challenge she faced;

1. She must be humble and teachable

2. She must faithfully exemplify biblical womanhood

3. She must draw strength and inspiration from God who richly provide them with

everything needed to enjoy life at the maximum (1Timothy 6:17).

4. She must get necessary encouragement and specific support to be excellent wife to

her husband and family by being in intimate relationship with her husband,

5. She must be very hard working and contribute to the on-going project of the

church. Hand work will also protect her integrity and help her to appear neat and

attractive,

6. She must be prayerful to the extent that she becomes regular attendant at the

throne of mercy and on daily basis commune with God.

7. She should make use of her time by learning something new; such as soap

making, gardening, tailoring, computer, continuing education among others.

8. She should understand her gifts and use them to move the church forward.

CHAPTER FOUR

DATA PRESENTATION, ANALYSIS AND DISCUSSION OF FINDINGS

4.1 Data Presentation and Analysis

26
27
28
29
 30

CHAPTER FIVE

SUMMARY, CONCLUSION AND RECOMMENDATIONS

5.1 Summary

This research is centered on the Role of the Pastor’s wife as an Adviser in the COCIN

women Fellowship in the Regional Church Council (RCC), Gigiring. The scope was restrict

to five (5) local government councils within the larger scope of RCC Gigiring. Chapter one

dealt with the various aspects to set the research on foot; the background of the study,

statement of the problem, research questions, aims and objectives of the study, significance of

the study, methodology, and definition of operational terms. Chapter two was committed to

literature review, chapter three centered on the place of the pastor’s wife in COCIN and her

role as adviser to the CWF, chapter four was on Data presentation and Analysis, while

chapter five closed with summary, conclusion and recommendations.

5.2 Conclusion
 31

The pastor’s wife is an integral part of the pastoral ministry. However, this stay unveiled that

COCIN has subjected the pastor’s wife to be an adviser to the CWF and other groups in the

church. This is quite laudable but the gap so discovered is that that constitution of the church

does not have a backing for her as her roles as adviser are not constitutional defined.

The Bye-laws just mentioned that the pastor’s wife to be an advisers to the CWF but it is as a

toothless bull-dog, that is, she has no authority to function as an adviser. She is most pitied as

the advice she gives is subject to the scrutiny of the leadership of the CWF. Thus, her advice

may be considered.

This research revealed that there have been serious collusions between the pastor’s wives and

the leaders of the CWF. The leaders of the CWF considered themselves as superior to the

pastor’s wives as they are elected by their members while the later one were advisers. Thus, it

is a necessity to ensure that all hands are put on deck to see that CWF function smoothly and

achieve her aims, goals and objectives by placing round pegs in round holes.

5.3 Recommendations

In view of the findings in chapter four of this work, the following recommendations have
become necessary;
1. The church, that is COCIN, should make a review of the constitution and clearly spelt
out what the roles the pastor’s wife is expected to achieve as an adviser to the CWF.
2. The pastor’s wife is part and parcel of the pastoral ministry and to look down on her is
not good enough. Her roles as a pastor’s wife need to be explicitly defined. If this is
done, the pastor’s wife be able to function well using her areas of gifting.
3. The church should come out with a chain of command for the subgroups and
especially the CWF in such a way that the pastor’s input should not be considered as
thrash.
 32

4. The church should also help the pastor’s wife to move with dynamic nature of the
society especially in terms of educational improvement. The pastor’s wife should
have a minimum educational standard set by the church. The church can offer
scholarship to the pastor’s wives to achieve this so that others should not see the
pastor’s wife as less educated.
5. Another very vital suggestion is that the church should considered pastor’s wives to
be gainful employment so that others should not see that as “parasites”. They should
be given jobs perhaps with the church to ensure they are on salaries, especially now
that money is a parameter for livelihood and the harsh economic reality of the society.

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APPENDIX
 37

Gindri Theological Seminary,

(In Affiliation with University of Jos)\
P.M.B 01001, Gindri,
Plateau State-Nigeria.

Rev. Dr. Mr. Mrs…………

……………………………
…………………………….

APPOINTMENT FOR INTERVIEW

Greetings in the most precious name of Jesus Christ.

I am a student of the above institution. I am writing my project on the topic: PASTOR’S

WIFE AS AN ADVISER OF WOMEN FELLOWSHIP IN COCIN REGIONAL

CHURCH COUNCIL GIGIRING.

I will be grateful if you can give me an appointment to interact with you at your convenient.

The questions for discussion are here attached.

Thanks for your kind cooperation and consideration

Yours faithfully,

Tenshak Janet Adamu

(Mrs. Gideon Kannap).
08162069698

QUESTIONS FOR DISCUSSION

1. What is the place of the Pastor’s Wife in the church of Christ in nation (COCIN)?
 38

2. What is the understanding of the Pastor’s Wife as an adviser in the women

Fellowship?

3. What are the challenges faced by the Pastor’s Wife as an adviser to the Women

Fellowship?

4. How can the Problem faced by the Pastor’s Wife as an adviser to the women

Fellowship be overcome.

PERSONAL ORAL INTERVIEWS

S/N TITLE/NAME POSITION SEX PLACE OF DATE

INTERVIE
 39

W
1. Mrs. Esther Gokum Assistant women F Jos 01/08/2020
leader, RCC
Gigiring
2. Mrs. Matheg Pastor’s wife F Jos 31/07/2020
Yahnan
3. Mrs. Plong Pastor’s wife F Jos 31/07/2020
Chuwang
4. Mrs. Vwi Assistant Secretary F Jos 31/07/2020
CWF RCC Gigiring
5. Rev. William RCC Chairman RCC F Jos 06/08/2020
Istifanus John Gigiring
6. Mrs. Paulina Nyako Pastor’s wife F Jos 06/08/2020
7. Mrs. Nandi Japhath Member CWF RCC F Jos 06/08/2020
Gigiring
8. Mrs. Mili Yakubu Member CWF RCC F Jos 06/08/2020
Gigiring
9. Rev. Seth Usman Former COCIN M Jos 14/08/2020
Nden General Secretary
10. Rev. Bulus Dung COCIN Director of M Jos 14/08/2020
Tsok Evangelism and
church Growth
11. Rev. Paul Ganamu Former COCIN M Jos 14/08/2020
Mankan Director of
Evangelism and
Church Growth
12. Mrs. Lami Dakap CWF Leader Godl & F Jos 14/08/2020
Baze
13. Mrs. Deborah COCIN General F Jos 20/08/2020
Molizo Secretary’s