Selena Gomez On Recapturing Her Public Image,

Mental Health And Her No. 1 Album

It must have been difficult: two public breakups, struggles with Lupus, a
kidney transplant. You've been public about a lot of this, too.
I felt I didn't get a respectful closure.

The reason why I've become so vocal about the trials and tribulations of my life
is because people were already going to narrate that for me. I wasn't going to
have a choice because of how fast everything moves now. And most of the time,
yes, it's not true, or it's an embellished version of what the truth is. I want to be
able to tell my story the way that I want to tell it. And all of these things
happened, and I wasn't going to deny that, I wasn't going to pretend to put a
smile on when it actually was awful — a few of the worst moments of my life.
And I don't know if I would have made it. And that's medical reasons, obviously,
and emotional reasons. I just had to find a way to claim my story.

"Lose You To Love Me" is your first No. 1 song off this album — tell me about
this song.
I'm very proud of it. It has a different meaning to me now from when I wrote it.
I felt I didn't get a respectful closure, and I had accepted that, but I know I
needed some way to just say a few things that I wish I had said. It's not a hateful
song; it's a song that is saying — I had something beautiful and I would never
deny that it wasn't that. It was very difficult and I'm happy it's over. And I felt
like this was a great way to just say, you know, it's done, and I understand that,
and I respect that, and now here I am stepping into a whole other chapter.

Saying goodbye to Justin Bieber, who I'm assuming you're speaking about.
You had to get the name in, I get it.

Do you look back on that time, and when you think about the parts of your
life that were painful, that you've kind of moved on from, is that one of the
harder parts?
No, because I've found the strength in it. It's dangerous to stay in a victim
mentality. And I'm not being disrespectful, I do feel I was a victim to certain
abuse —

You mean emotional abuse?

Yes, and I think that it's something that — I had to find a way to understand it as
an adult. And I had to understand the choices I was making. As much as I
definitely don't want to spend the rest of my life talking about this, I am really
proud that I can say I feel the strongest I've ever felt and I've found a way to just
walk through it with as much grace as possible.
I want to go out on the song "Vulnerable," because to me the idea of staying
vulnerable represents the ability to move forward. What does that song
mean to you?
That means to me that vulnerability — and I've said this before — is a strength.
And as I grew up in this chaotic space, I did have to learn how to be tough, and
to be strong, but I'm not this hard person. And I have every right to be: From 7-
years-old to 27, I've been working, and I've had the most horrible things said to
me, said about me, and being exposed to way too much. One of my issues is that
I always felt like I was this weak person because I would cry, or I would get
emotional, or I hated when people were rude. I just started getting to the place,
definitely a few years ago, where I understood that vulnerability is actually such
a strength. I shine the most within when I'm sharing my story with someone, or
when I'm there for a friend, or when I do meet someone, I'm not bitter and
sarcastic — I mean sometimes I am, but I'm proud that I'm okay with speaking
about my heart. And the whole song is saying "Hey if I give this to you, If I give
myself to you, are you strong enough to be there for me?" If not, I'll let go of the
situation but I'm still going to be vulnerable to what's next.