Speech : It's time we call it for what it is…

For those who were fortunate enough to experience first-hand the baptismisal moments of
grass-stained knees during boyhood, epic tales of bonding and belonging, of ritualised violence,
loyalty and brotherhood bound not by blood spilt but heart - years of schooling and higher education
become a prized singular experience that can be more so likened to that of a precious pearl or secret
shared only with their peers which then goes on to define their understanding of the importance of
tradition. For those men who value cultural tradition, principle, excellence and strong academic
achievement - elite boys private schools are their means to an end, their way of marking the
beginning of the transition from boyhood to manhood. Within these schools, the time comes for their
students to become men, in their pride and age, the generational cycle continues when they choose
to share that tradition with their sons. These core foundations illustrate what these schools allegedly
stand for, but it's time to call it for what it really is. We must ask ourselves the question, of what really
lies beyond those gates of academic prestige?

Within contemporary Australia, elite private boy schools’ uphold and maintain many cultural practises
deeply rooted in their schools’ history - a lecturer from Monash University, George Variyan, identifying
some of these ‘rusted-on’ cultural practises to be gender segregation, the lyonization of sport,
encouragement of hyper-competition and masculinity. All of which are stubborn remnants of the past
and living evidence of the remaining influence of their forebears. As a result of this well embedded
cultural practises, cultural and social pressures build to amount to and manifest toxic and
hyper-masculinity. It is during highschool and these years of schooling that are critical in the formation
of identity, as adolescents work to develop and form an identity and sense of self. In an expansion on
ego psychologist, Erik Erikson’s work, James Marcia (a developmental psychologist) wrote an
academic journal describing how identity formation during adolescence sees decision points and
commitments be involved and made in respect to the dominant ideologies (such as religion, politics)
and occupations (such as, school) within a teenagers’ day-to-day life.

In school, adolescents face many pressures which affect socialisation and identity formation and
development - confusion and conflict can occur especially when young boys face foreclosure, an
academic term meaning premature identity formation which sees adolescents adopt an identity
without truly exploring options beyond superficiality. And in a schooling environment that is
gender-segregated and problematic in nature, young boys are being told what is expected of them if
they are to be men. Whatever that means. During an already tumultuous, stressful and confusing time
in their lives, young boys receive accolades and are seen as promising for performing masculinity well
–and it is this type of masculinity that is too often stereotypical and uncompromising in it’s quality. The
byproducts of this are negative attitudes, values, beliefs and norms held by our boys which enable,
excuse and make misogynistic, homophobic, transphobic and racist behaviours commonplace. And
what does deviance and non-conformance to these ideals lead to? It leads to shaming, scrutiny and
disapproval from their peers and these are their brothers that we’re talking about.

It is this particular personification of masculinity, stemming from old power dynamics and patriarchal
standards that serves to promote dominance, masculine power, authority as supported by academic
Terry A Kuppers.Another serious issue with the existing rhetoric and cultural practises being seen
employed by these hyper-masculine institutions is the way in which group cohesion is maintained
through either borderline contempt or open and aggressive hostility towards a designated ‘other’ -
usually being socially vulnerable peoples, minorities or outsiders.

The implications of all this considered, sees controversy and discussion of elite private school boys
routinely interrupt and emerge into the public consciousness - one incident and headline at a time.
‘Culture of Hyper-Masculinity’: Boys’ Schools Grapple with Gender. A Burning Blazer Is A
Reminder Of Toxic School Culture. Melbourne Private School Boys’ Ongoing Sexist Culture Is
Unacceptable, But Fixable.

Jack Murrary, a former graduate from the and all boys private school, Berwick Grammar College,
spoke to The Age of the rampaging culture that ran prevalent throughout his school during his time
there. He spoke heavily of the sexist and misogynistic attitudes and misbehaviours that he witnessed
many of his peers proudly own, stating that it was normalised - discussing how and I quote “[my
school] was a breeding ground for toxic masculinity because [my peers] were never met with any
disciplinary action or correction”. He said that in addition to this, he and many others felt a constant
‘suffocating weight’ of needing to fit the idea of a real man - one that is dominant, desirable and
successful. This social and cultural phenomenon is a common experience among many young boys
and is a consequential result of the structure of most all-boys schools where boys are victims to the
heterosexist ‘machinery’ that organises relational life within these schools (Variyan & Wilkinson). It
can be draining as well as mentally and psychologically isolating - where boys’ are largely pushed to
conform and fulfil the expectations held by the dominant culture as opposed to having the freedom
and confidence to prioritise finding themselves.

This is the type of mindset and pressure that is so normalised within elite all boys private schools
which consequently imparts upon young men an internal idea of who they should be which they
respectively carry with them throughout the rest of their lives - beyond that of their school gates. And
with this, comes an inevitable issue that sees young boys at such early and crucial formative ages
adopt attitudes, values, beliefs and norms which while once acceptable behind closed doors and in
sweaty locker rooms are met with a different reaction in wider society. And a lot of unlearning and
progress needs to be done.

Within Australia, same-sex schools outpreform their co-ed counterparts by 84% however while these
institutions are securing their students strong academic results and their best in their pursuit of
knowledge - my question is, at what cost?

The psychological and mental impacts that elite private school culture can bear on young male
adolescents needs immediate attention and consideration by contemporary society today - an
introduction of new leadership persons, a dedicated school assembly, or social engineering alone will
not do.

If elite private boys schools aren’t prepared to address that excuses such as ‘boys will be boys’ can
no longer suffice, then perhaps the situation cannot be helped. In order to achieve any progress
whatsoever, these high-risk and hyper-masculine educational institutions in question need to work
towards creating a more positive and healthy environment affording young boys with the opportunity
to grow and build a sense of self and character. And this begins with taking action, as inaction means
complicity.

Until then, the grass will only ever appear greener on their side of what it really is.

RESEARCH

https://www.aare.edu.au/blog/?p=8585
For those who value strong academic tradition, excellence, principle, the pursuit of knowledge and a better future for their younger sons,

To begin with, we need to understand that masculinity and identity in gender-segregated elite private schooling has always been problematic.

Going back to these schools’ historic roots, the English public schools, tales of belonging, of bonding, of ritualised violence, and fidelity to the
group have historically animated its sensibilities, infusing British elite with the logics of empire-building.

ST KEVINS INCIDENT : MELBOURNE

St Kevin’s has developed a strong academic tradition where each boy is encouraged to take responsibility for his own learning in an environment
that values knowledge and scholarship. We strive for the development of the whole person integrating spiritual development, academic success,
cultural awareness and sporting participation in the context of the Catholic tradition.

While the contemporary elite private schools and their parents might have more cosmopolitan goals for their boys, the worst effects of the modern
elite private boys’ schools’ rusted-on cultural practises, their gender segregation, their lyonization of sport, and the hyper-competition that are
hangovers from their forebears continue to manifest a toxic masculinity. For example, in the Australian media, in particular, there have been
reports of elite private schoolboys who “encouraged viewers [of a student’s Instagram account] to vote on the ‘slut of the year’,” and elite
schoolboys who “filmed and distributed humiliating material”.

We encourage our students to pursue the truth, to discern a meaning and purpose for their existence and to enrich their spiritual lives. Respect,
truth, freedom, justice, love and service are the guiding principles of all relationships and social activities. St Kevin’s students are actively
encouraged to develop an awareness of and empathy with people in the wider community, in particular through community service programs.

Central to the mission of St Kevin’s College is the promotion of excellence in learning as an essential means of facilitating human growth and
liberation, the recognition of family life as providing an affirming context for the nurturing of the whole person and a desire for all to achieve
fullness of life.

WEBSITE :
https://lens.monash.edu/@education/2020/02/21/1379724/st-kevins-college-the-crisis-confronting-modern-elite-privat
e-boys-schools

TOXIC MASCULINITY : GENDER CODES/STEREOTYPES STEMMED

At puberty, often the beginning of high school, that gendered codes of behaviour become suffocatingly strict. Michael Salter, a professor in
criminology at the University of New South Wales and expert in masculinity, explains that this is the age when gender segregation sets in and
boys are actively discouraged seeing their female friends as human beings. He explains that in this period of time, ‘Boys are subject to physical
violence from other boys, can be seen in some way as weak or overly sympathetic if they are interested in platonic relationships, which then
become actively sexualised by young boys. It’s a total failure of empathy, a failure to see a girl as human.’

High school is when young people are trying their hardest to fit in and establish their identity, including what’s expected of their gender. Boys will
receive accolades for performing masculinity well – a type of masculinity that’s all too often tied to misogyny and homophobia – and be bullied
when they don’t. Rigid gender performance is expected of girls too, and those who fall outside of the cisgender binary can be heavily persecuted
for it at this age. But it’s this particular flavour of masculinity, stemming from power and patriarchy, that defines itself by putting others down and
has earned the name ‘toxic’.

So, what can we do? Rallying governments and local schools to implement comprehensive sex and relationship education that covers more than
just the ‘nuts and bolts’ is a critical first step. But there’s also another way of tackling this problem that’s equally, if not more important, and that’s
just to talk. Talk about these issues, how and why they manifest, and how we can combat them. Talk about gender expectations, unhealthy
behaviours and healthy role models. Talk with our families, our schools, universities, workplaces, and friendship groups. And most importantly,
talk with our children and young people.

WEBSITE:https://sexeducationaustralia.com.au/2021/03/25/from-boys-to-men-gender-performance-toxic-m
asculinity-parliament-and-australias-metoo-moment/

THE DANGERS OF TOXIC MASCULINITY IN GENERAL TO MEN!

Our findings showed that many young men remain greatly influenced by these societal messages of what it means to be a man. For example,
young men were particularly likely to agree with statements that society expects men to act strong (69%), fight back when pushed (60%) and
never say no to sex (56%).

However, some traditional ideals seem to be dropping away. Few young men agreed that society tells them they should use violence to get
respect (35%), straight men should shun gay men as friends (36%), boys shouldn’t learn how to cook and clean (38%), and men shouldn’t do
household chores (39%).
There was also a consistent gap between social messages and personal ideals, with lower personal endorsement of every element of traditional
manhood.

Still, a sizable number of young men believed men should act strong (47%), be the primary breadwinners (35%) and fight back when pushed
around (34%).

Fewer respondents agreed that men should have as many sexual partners as they can (25%), avoid housework and child care (23%) and use
violence to get respect (20%).

In a particularly troubling finding, 27% of young men believed they should always have the final say about decisions in their relationships and 37%
believed they should know where their wives or girlfriends are at all times.

Conforming to ideals of traditional masculinity has a real cost, both for young men themselves and for the women and men around them.

Our findings show that being inside the “Man Box” – having higher-than-average agreement with traditional masculine ideals – is bad for young
men’s health.

WEBSITE:https://theconversation.com/australian-study-reveals-the-dangers-of-toxic-masculinity-to-men-an
d-those-around-them-104694