Instructor Andreea Corona

Linguistics 3C - 15:00 PM
10/21/2022

Be calm, be brave, and don’t be afraid

As a girl, I often spotted that there are such comments about women: “Girl, just
get a job, don’t work as hard as those ‘corporate slaves’ that work 12 hours a day.”,
“Women, what's the use of making money? It's so sad without a family!”... Women
are often confused by these voices of doubt, and even become fearful: When the
opportunities knock, they often hesitate. Even before the chance comes, they give up
the courage to advance. Of course, not all women do. Compared with men,
nevertheless, women often have more internal obstacles when facing opportunities
and challenges than men.
In Caroline Paul’s article “Why Do We Teach Girls That It’s Cute to Be Scared?”
we could figure that women are often defined as being scared and unable to do many
things. “I spoke recently to a friend who admitted that she cautioned her daughter
much more than her son,” she indicates that maternal instinct was sparring with
feminism, and feminism was losing. Nevertheless, Caroline Paul provides her own
example that women can do many things after overcoming setbacks, “Misadventures
meant that I should try again. With each triumph over fear and physical adversity, I
gained confidence.” Moreover, Saujani in her TED talk “Teach Girls Bravery, Not
Perfection” expresses the same feeling: “Most girls are taught to avoid risk and
failure. We're taught to smile pretty, play it safe, get all A's. Boys, on the other hand, are
taught to play rough, swing high, crawl to the top of the monkey bars and then just jump off
headfirst.” Women are often divided into group who fear many things in the aspect of
careers, hobbies, and so on owing to the stereotype in society, they are indeed affected
to some extent. Whereas they actually are not as fragile as imagined, by attempting
new things, overcoming setbacks, and walking out of comfort zone, they would
discover their infinite potential inside, and challenging themselves to become a more
excellent person. Besides, the surrounding could also play a role in helping women to
change their figures.
Firstly, the fear of girls could be partially attributed to society. According to Paul,
a woman fire fighter, she mentioned that “What I didn’t expect was the question I
heard more than any other: ‘Aren’t you scared?’ It was strange — and insulting — to
have my courage doubted. I never heard my male colleagues asked this. Apparently,
fear is expected of women.” Paul provides her own experience of being doubt whether
she had the physical ability to work as a firefighter. She highlights that this question is
only prevalent in women but rare in men. Therefore, not only happening to her, but
also to society, people’s doubts exert an invisible pressure on women. They are
influenced by the subconscious that they might be unable to challenge new things or
complete some tasks, and they gradually accept this “truth”. Thus, when they are
asked to complete some challenging work, angst comes out naturally. Take my
cousin’s competition of controlling the model airplane as an example. She has been a
lover of all sorts of technological models since she was a child, when it came to her
first experience of applying for the campus competition of manipulating the model
airplane that she made, other students’ parents murmured a lot, questioning that
“whether a girl had the ability to represent the whole class to attend this
competition?”, “Don’t you think it is outlandish for girls to use technology so well as
boys?” After hearing these commons, my young cousin cried, and couldn’t be helped
questioning herself, she said she was fairly afraid and inconsolable. Therefore, it
forms a stereotype, which adversely prevents girls from reaching higher levels of
tasks, and creates fear for them, which proliferates among girls. However, they could
get rid of this impression.
Actually, girls don’t act as timid as they imagine in the reality, they should
believe that they are able to try many things they like. As long as they make a small
step out, they would encounter numerous fantastic things waiting for them. Despite
they may encounter numerous obstacles along the way, which motivate them to keep
progressing. Caroline Paul has encountered many accidents while trying challenging
programs. She biked down a steep country road, sledded down an icy hill... “I don’t
remember my parents freaking out; they seemed to understand that mishaps were part
of childhood. I got a few stitches, and kept biking and sledding.” She argues that
misadventures push people to retry, “With each triumph over fear and physical
adversity, I gained confidence.” The author’s own experience raises a significant point
that women could get resilience and confidence by trying many things. Through
attempts, women would discover their unlimited potential inside, though sometimes
the first try doesn’t go smoothly, they step out from their original circle. I used to be a
small girl who was sickly with low immunity, being afraid of all sorts of physical
exercises. Whereas, every student was required to pass the high school entry
examination that included a physical strength test. To get through this, I had to start
physical training every week, 6months before the test. Every weekend I went to a high
school nearby my home, practicing 800m running 3 times. Every time I ran 80% of
the way, I felt I was out of breath, my legs seemed “crippling”, as heavy as sandbags,
but my father took a stopwatch to time me at the edge of the playground. I gritted my
teeth and thought: I must run within 3 minutes and 20 seconds. I strode forward
rapidly. Each time finishing running, I was exhausted but got a sense of
accomplishment, which stimulated me to persist. After monthly training, I
successfully pass the test and got a full score. Furthermore, according to the TED talk
“Teach Girls Bravery, Not Perfection” by Reshma Saujani, “At the fifth grade
level, girls routinely outperform boys in every subject, including math and science, so it's
not a question of ability.” Thus, girls are precocious and completely have the ability to
do many things ideally. And as long as we continue trying and conquering, everything
can be done as expected. What women do tells society that preposterous bondage
should be broken.
In addition to girls themselves, parents, and society should play a role in
encouraging girls to make challenges. Caroline Paul, the author of the article “Why
Do We Teach Girls That It’s Cute to Be Scared?”, recently asked her mother why she
never tried to stop her challenges. “She said that her own mother had been very
fearful, gasping at anything remotely rough-and-tumble. ‘I had been so discouraged
from having adventures, and I wanted you to have a more exciting childhood,’ she
told me.” The author’s mother is a typical example that supports children to have
adventures, because of her mother's support, the author participated in challenging
activities from childhood, such as biking, and finally became a fireman, doing many
challenging and difficult moves. When I was 12 and travelled to New Zealand, there
was a program of sky diving, I was eager to give it a try but still hesitating, what I
didn't expect was that my parents would decisively support me to try. The first jump
from a height of more than 3,000 meters, I had a little fear, but very excited, and
successfully completed this interesting project. Since then, I started picking up some
physical skills like butterfly stroke and boxing. Each time learning boxing my father
accompanies me, and practice with me after class to help me consolidate the skills
I’ve learned. I find I completely enjoy learning these and harnessing them, and I am
no longer that frail and sickly little girl. This is why parents should educate their kids
zealously that girls are no worse than boys, comforting them while they confronted
with difficulties and encouraging them to continuously attempt. Just as what Saujani
said: “We have to teach them to be brave in schools and early in their careers, when it has
the most potential to impact their lives and the lives of others, and we have to show them
that they will be loved and accepted not for being perfect but for being courageous.”
People have no rights to deprive women of fear!
Proof by facts, although there might be some stereotypes toward girls and they
might be discouraged, women, as well as girls should believe that they can do
anything they want and they are fully competent. Parents could also build the correct
value for girls. Girls, just do it, as the lyrics say “I believe I can fly, I believe I can
touch the sky”! It is time for them to ooze the charm!
(Word Count: 1463)
 Works Cited
Caroline, Paul. February 20, 2016 “Why Do We Teach Girls That It’s Cute to Be
Scared?”https://docs.google.com/document/d/1wl1Ye6Ya21ZxNlmf2NDSvxWbGgw
oH--pYsNc0afbA8A/edit#heading=h.80vt9wo278l2
Reshma, Saujani. “Teach Girls Bravery, Not Perfection”
https://www.ted.com/talks/reshma_saujani_teach_girls_bravery_not_perfection