Week Discussion 1

The two sorts of looks that people employ to indicate what they desire from another person are
positive and autonomous faces. In contrast, autonomous face is displayed when a person desires
some "independence, privacy, appreciation for our achievements, or time alone." Positive face
"occurs when we strive to encourage other people to like and respect us." Cahn and Abigail
(2014), page 7.2
I literally cannot think of a specific instance, but I am aware that there have been
occasions in my prior work when I have spoken with customers while maintaining a pleasant
attitude. Being happy, pleasant, and kind have always been requirements for the customer service
positions I've held. I am aware that occasionally a woman might come out as flirting when she is
being overly pleasant or courteous, especially to a customer who is a man. To ensure that my
intentions weren't misunderstood when I was dealing with a male consumer, I always made sure
to talk to and establish eye contact with his female companion throughout the conversation.
An example of autonomous face is one that stands out to me from right after I gave birth
to my first child. My husband and I had a younger friend who recently found out she was
pregnant so she had a lot of questions for me and was interested in all that happened during my
pregnancy, birth and first days home from the hospital. I did not mind sharing my experience
with her, but she began to come over every single day after work and stayed until late in the
evening. I was tired and stressed as a new mom and wanted my privacy to learn all the new
duties of motherhood. I was not rude, but I did have to change my behavior to a more distant
interaction with her in order to get the privacy that I wanted and needed. My husband and I
eventually talked with her about how we were feeling so she did not feel like we were being
rude. That was a stressful situation and without knowing, I was using autonomous face to
express my need for privacy.

Reference
Cahn, D. D., & Abigail, R. A. (2014). Managing conflict through communication (5th ed.)