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Perfect Hair Forever

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Season 1
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0. Perfect Hair Forever/Anime Talk Show [0]

First aired: 11/7/2004

The viewer is treated to an anime parody involving a balding young man's quest to
stop his balding process and to find perfect hair with the helpful advice from his
sex-crazed "Uncle Grandfather" and a variety of colorful characters along the way.
Cartoon Network's very own Space Ghost then hosts a "Special Presentation" panel
talking with Meatwad, Sharko, and Squidbilly Early Cuyler on what they (and the
viewers) just saw.

1. Pilot [1]

First aired: 11/7/2004

The first episode concerns a young boy named Gerald who is on a quest to find the
perfect hair due to his extremely premature baldness. He seeks help from his "Uncle
Grandfather", a pervert who loves to eat and watch his young schoolgirl companion,
Brenda, dance around in a short mini-skirt and thong. Also of no particular help is
Uncle Grandfather's gift to Gerald, the "Action Hot Dog". Action Hot Dog is a hot
dog which chants annoyingly "do the la la la la!" The Hot Dog's comments prompt
Gerald to proclaim, "That's an annoying hot dog."

The hero soon enters a forest, in which he encounters Cat Man (a belligerent man
apparently dressed in a cat costume), an odd cloud (possibly a spoof of the Flying
Nimbus from the Dragon Ball series; at one point, Uncle Grandfather refers to
Gerald as "Gerald Bald Z"), Space Ghost being mauled by a Bear, and other insanity
involving his grand nemesis, the evil Coiffio who is "the evil controller of cats",
his Gundam-like robot companion, 'Model Robot', and his arboreal agent, the
Inappropriate Comedy Tree (who proudly proclaims "I have sex with dogs... what's up
with that?!").
The end credits are written in the Wingdings font and use the song "Love Theme" by
Eddie Horst which was later made available on page 2 of the Adult Swim website's
downloads page [1]. The credits rolled over live action footage of a "dancing
clown" windsock.

Writer: Matt Maiellaro

2. TiVo Your eBay [2]

First aired: 11/27/2005

The second episode featured an opening theme song by Brendon Small which is a
stylistic parody of the opening for The Big O. This episode has Gerald walking
through the forest where he left off with the "Action Hot Dog" following him as a
companion. Meanwhile, Uncle Grandfather means a young man dressed in a shiny purple
coat who claims to be "King of all Animals". The young man gives a typical anime
technobabble explanation about some random tragedy which is a mishmash of
references to shows Yu-Gi-Oh, Blue Gender, and Wolf's Rain. Uncle Grandfather gives
him a hamburger necklace, which is a parody of Yu-Gi-Oh's Millennium Puzzle which
the main character wears on a chain around his neck. He is then sent off to assist
Gerald on his quest, accompanied by a group of loud, cacophonous animals crammed
into an economy hatchback. Meanwhile, Gerald is confronted by a flame-like entity
named Rod, who calls himself the "Anime God". Gerald continues towards his
destination, Tuna Mountain, now followed by the Inappropriate Comedy Tree.

3. Cat Snatch Fever [3]

First aired: 12/4/2005

The third episode featured an opening theme song by the band Melt-Banana called
"Hair-cat ('Cause the wolf is a cat!)". This episode also revealed the
Inappropriate Comedy Tree's real name, Norman Douglas. After telling a rather loud
[and wet], story about why he left Coiffio and how much he loves his new jeans, he
joins Gerald and Hot Dog on their quest. However, their [relative] happiness did
not last, as they were then accosted by a freak tornado. Uncle Grandfather watches
in amusement from his roof, remarking "Oh man, the Tornado is about to suck up my
bald nephew...heh heh heh, awesome. So much for that retarded journey". Upon going
back inside, Rod suddenly appears before him. After a brief and pointless exchange
of words, Rod proceeds to tell Uncle Grandfather that Gerald and Co. are still
alive. Uncle Grandfather tells Rod to shut up, and proceeds to summon a hot dog bun
to ensnare him. Rod disappears, and Uncle Grandfather sends the bun to find Gerald
and tell him an important message. He then calls Brenda, proclaiming that he has
news of the utmost importance, and drops some change on the ground. Brenda picks it
up, with Uncle Grandfather watching, while eating a banana "Mmmm, bananana-na".
Meanwhile, the tornado turns out to be a friendly, if somewhat unstable, creature
named Terry/Twisty (he seems to only answer to one of those names at a given time,
and becomes enraged if he's not referred to by the one he prefers, although
Norman's loud talking has a similar effect). Coiffio, in his oddly phallic-shaped
spaceship (complete with testicle-shaped engine nacelles), is bathing in his hot
tub. He goes on about how he needs his robe to cover his "hot bod", while badly
mispronouncing words in a Porky Pig-like manner. He goes off to talk to Catman, and
once again, achieves next to nothing. The Animal King, while arguing with his
animal subjects, succeeds in driving right into a ditch. Gerald, while walking
along, begins to hear voices in the stump of his severed ear (cut off by Brenda in
the pilot), and the scene shifts to Brenda in a dark room, whispering in Japanese,
into Gerald's ear. Uncle Grandfather bursts into the room, accompanied by
unidentified policemen saying that Brenda has caused the beginning of the Cat-Bun
Wars! The last scene shows the armies of each side converging on each other, ready
to fight for reasons unknown. After the credits, Coiffio plays a little tune, which
seems to be a parody of Bob Dylan.

4. Happy Suck Day [4]

First aired: 12/9/2005

The episode begins with the Cat-Bun Wars in progress. The Young Man and his animals
(featuring MF DOOM as a giraffe) hear the battle from the ditch, which is in the
middle of the battlefield. The Young Man tries to use the hamburger necklace, which
is stolen by Astronomic Cat, along with his hand. The opening sequence plays, which
shows neon-colored versions of all the characters flying around in the dark, with
Gerald constantly walking. Space Cat takes the necklace and the Young Man's hand to
Coiffio, who then demands Model Robot turn in into an A-Bomb. Model Robot does so,
explodes, and sends Coiffio into space. He then sings a song about Model Robot.
Coiffio drifts back to the ship, where Rod tries to buy his house from him. Coiffio
commands Space Cat to run a background check on him. At the grocery store where
Catman works, Catman sells a 12-pack to a baby. Coiffio parachutes in to the front
of the store, just to be run over by the drunk-driving baby and shot by Catman, who
doesn't care about his problems. The baby drives into the ditch with the Young Man
and the animals. Uncle Grandfather tries to videotape a vacuum cleaner having sex
with a cake, but is asked to end the Cat-Bun Wars. He does so by asking the leaders
from the Cats (General Meow) and from the Buns (Commander Bun) to sign a peace
treaty, complaining that he has things to do. The episode ends with the Young Man
still stuck in the hole with the animals and the drunk baby. Coiffio is still after
Gerald. Uncle Grandfather is still taping his porno about the vacuum and cake, when
he is suddenly held at gunpoint by an MP. The credits roll, with neon Gerald
walking far into the distance. The end theme is by DangerDoom.

5. Woke Up Drunk [5]

First aired: 12/25/2005

The ending theme song for this episode is performed by Widespread Panic, although
the episode opens only with the mangled statement, "We now journey the join...
uhh... already in progress." Twisty and Norman Douglas get into a knife fight while
Gerald and Hotdog go off without them. After Gerald runs into Catman and his
trailer in the forest, and is offered LSD by Rod, Coiffio shows up on an oversized
motorcycle whose spokes are made of hot dogs, and challenges Gerald to a race to
the death ("choppa-duew"). In exchange for Coiffio agreeing to sell his house to
him, and Gerald agreeing to buy Rod's Journey tickets, Rod magically transports the
two (along with most of the other characters) to a racetrack, where buns (singing
Hotdog's trademark "Do Da La La La") and cats (meowing) fill the stands, and the
Young Man and the giraffe provide the commentary from the booth. Catman releases an
alligator onto the track to attack Gerald (and prevent him from "wictory"), but it
goes after Coiffio instead. Astronomic Cat lifts the alligator off of Coiffio's
bike and onto Gerald's, but Hotdog transforms into a "wienercycle" and saves Gerald
by dueling with the gator. Gerald appears to have the advantage when Coiffio's hair
falls off, but he abandons the race when he sees a chance to launch his bike to
Tuna Mountain.

6. Tusk [6]

First aired: 12/16/2005

During a parody of 50s variety shows and mainstream American sitcoms, Gerald and
his companions come ever closer to Tuna Mountain after several musical and
laughtrack segments (In one scene see Felix the Bear wrestling with a shark,
possibly a reference to a novel (Bear v Shark) by Chris Bachelder) along with a
conference by worried corporate television executives over the poor audience
reaction to "Japanese Bear Dad" (the bear chasing Space Ghost in Episode 1). The
executives are rudely interrupted by a drunken Space Ghost looking for work, likely
as a self-referential joke to the now cancelled/permanently hiatical Space Ghost
Coast to Coast). Eventually we see Gerald and his companions continue walking
toward Tuna Mountain. At the end, we see three military policemen in bed,
apparently having sex though none of them move (they just remain in their usual
"attention" position, and they blame standards for not allowing them to thrust).
The end theme is by Diplo.

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Season 2
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1. Return to Balding Victory [7]

First aired: April 1, 2007

Gerald wakes up after his crash and continues his journey to Tuna Mountain. Soon
the forest and all surrounding areas fall victim to a friendly flood named Wetsy.
The ending theme was performed by Widespread Panic.

Episode 7 aired midnight April 1, 2007 as part of Adult Swim's April Fool's Joke.
This joke spanned the entire block, beginning with this episode and then airing all
of season 1 in reverse order and in the style of old VHS fansubs, complete with
Engrish subtitles on most episodes. Occasionally, instead of the Engrish subtitles,
transcripts from other Adult Swim shows were presented instead. It replaced
scheduled premieres of Bleach, Blood Plus, and Eureka Seven. (The prank was hinted
to though, as the schedule listed the same episodes that were to be shown that
weekend for the next weekend ahead of time)

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