Excited Little Girl

There was a pretty-cute-girl who lives in a family that can be considered quite
harmonious. When she was 4 years old or in grade 1 kindergarten, she studied a lot, read,
wrote, and anything that grade 2 kindergarten children did. When the semester was about to
end, she told her father that she wanted to enter elementary school next year, not wainting to
continue to grade 2. Her father agreed with that, because he felt she was capable.

The little girl really can't wait to enter elementary school even not old enough. She was
also so impatient to learn other things in the elementary school. In fact, when she was bought
the elementary school uniform by her mother, she wore it almost every day.

The time came, her first day of school in elementary school. She was escorted by her
father and introduced to her homeroom teacher. She had a great day, because she met a lot of
new friends.

Time went fast, the time to go home for first graders was 10 am. She waited on the
terrace of her class while watching her friends who were picked up one by one. She waited a
very long time, she noticed upperclassmen interacting with each other, wanted to ask but was
unsure, wanted to ask for help but was afraid.

A few hours later, the upperclassmen approached her and asked “Isn’t anyone going to
pick you up?”. The girl immediately cried because she realized that she had waited too long
and felt very afraid. She said “My father hasn’t picked me up.”. The girl’s cry caught the
attention of other upperclassmen, and they called her homeroom teacher.

The homeroom teacher immediately called the girl’s father. A few minutes later, her
father came. Her father felt sorry and apologized on the way home to her. “Sorry daughter, I
just had a break, at 10 am I’m still working. For the next, you can sit in the teacher’s room
and waiting for me. Don’t cry anymore little girl.”. The girl said “ah father, that's not some
kind of solution, it would be boring waiting for you for hours like before, I was cried.”

When she got home, the girl told her mother that her first day of school was very
exciting and also a little sad. The girl realized, she was very afraid to ask and ask for help to
the people around her. If she had asked for help earlier, father would have picked her up
earlier too.
NO Aspect being Assessed and Analysed Yes No Comment or Example

a When did the story take place?

b Where did the story take place?

c How is the main character like?

d What does the main character look

like?

e Does the text mostly use the past

tense?

f Are the paragraphs written in

cronological order?

g Does the text use appropriate

connectors to unite the paragraphs?

h Is the plot clear?

i Is the spelling and punctuation

appropriate?