How to Bag an Idol

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/43683555.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: M/M
Fandom: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
Relationship: Kaedehara Kazuha/Scaramouche, Raiden Ei | Baal/Yae Miko
Character: Scaramouche (Genshin Impact), Kaedehara Kazuha, Venti (Genshin
Impact), Raiden Ei | Baal, Yae Miko (Genshin Impact), Ying | Lumine
(Genshin Impact), Kong | Aether (Genshin Impact), Xiao | Alatus
(Genshin Impact), Sangonomiya Kokomi
Additional Tags: 4NEMO Fanon Band (Genshin Impact), Alternate Universe - Modern
Setting, Alternate Universe - Celebrity, Streamer Scaramouche
(Genshin Impact), Idol Kaedehara Kazuha, Established Relationship,
Scaramouche-centric (Genshin Impact), Alternate Universe - Idols,
Alternate Universe - Twitch Streamers, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Mommy
Issues, Suicidal Thoughts, Raiden Ei | Baal is Scaramouche's Parent,
Mutual Pining, Romance, True Love, Falling In Love, GUITAR RIZZ IS
REAL AGENDA, Social Media, Meet-Cute, Cute, Kaedehara Kazuha in
Love, Scaramouche is Called Kunikuzushi (Genshin Impact), Exes,
second chance lovers, Fame, Musicians, Music, Flustered
Scaramouche (Genshin Impact), Flustered Kaedehara Kazuha,
Alternate Universe - High School
Language: English
Series: Part 5 of Genshin Celebrities AU
Collections: genshin, I'll hold them dearly for as long as I can
Stats: Published: 2022-12-18 Completed: 2023-01-07 Chapters: 4/4 Words:
23280

How to Bag an Idol

by lynnthewaffle

Summary

tfw your highschool ex (who youre TOTALLY over) becomes the most famous idol of all
time and you're the #1 top-charted streamer

or

Love is forged in distance and yearning and music.

Notes

the title for this fic was gonna be Everything Has Changed and i was battling between my
inner swiftie and a good title
alternatively: lets play how many taylor swift references i can fit into a 2-chapter fic
 This Love is Ours
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Kunikuzushi didn't want to die. He wished he'd never been born at all.

It probably wasn't normal for a 15-year-old to have absolutely zero will left to live, but what the
hell was there to live for? The socioeconomic political state of the world is in shambles. His mom's
shit. And looking across the class he's been with for a whole year, he realizes, I don't think I'd care
if a single one of these fuckers dropped dead this instant.

He'd sat in the very back, left corner of the classroom. He kept his head down, only spoke when
spoken to, and if anyone tried to befriend him he'd promptly tell them to fuck off. That's how he fell
into his reputation: the quiet kid who you're better off leaving alone. And Kunikuzushi liked it that
way.

"Kunikuzushi?"

His head snapped forward. The boy in front of him, soft-faced with a pretty smile, picked a manilla
card from the top of the stack and slid it across his desk.

"Your end of year report," Kaedehara said, peeking at the list of grades. The lowest number on the
page was 97.8%. "Wow."

Kunikuzushi took his sheet with no response.

This was the part when people usually thought, Ew, this kid's so arrogant or Yikes, this is awkward
and promptly left Kunikuzushi in his preferred state: alone.

So imagine his surprise when Kazuha pulls up the seat in front of him, leans over his desk and
starts chatting.

"Do you study a lot?"

Kunikuzushi squinted. "Go away."

That made Kazuha freeze. He blinked once, twice, and then the saddest kicked-puppy expression
crept onto his face, and he whispered with the most pitiful, broken little voice, "Did.. did I do
something wrong?"

Shit. Ugh, now Kunikuzushi felt bad. "No, it's just- do you need something?"

Kazuha tilted his head. "No?"

"Then why are you still here?"

"Can I not talk to you unless I need things?"

Kunikuzushi shrugged. Usually people didn't.

"Well, then, I need someone to talk to."

"You're the most popular person in our class- scratch that, our year."

"I need someone smart to talk to."

"You're the second highest graded in our year as well."

Kazuha blinked. "You know a lot about me."

That tends to happen when you blend into the background. People treat you like wallpaper, gossip
in front of you like you're not even there.

"Kaedehara," Kunikuzushi starts, like he's about to go off on a long spiel. "Student council
president. Beloved by teachers and students alike. You like cats and poetry and dry-braised fish. A
pair of hands couldn't count how many girls are into you."

He looks dead straight into Kazuha's eyes and hopes it creeps him out enough to back away.

Instead, Kazuha leans in closer, starry-eyed and inquisitive. "Oh, you're interesting," he smiles like
a kid with a new toy, "How aren't we friends yet, Kuni?"

"Do not call me Kuni."

"Y'know you don't have to call me Kaedehara either right."

"Okay, Kaedehara."

They, to Kunikuzushi's great dismay, become friends.

What's worse is Kunikuzushi starts fucking enjoying it. Conversations with Kaedehara are
adequately stipulating. No matter what out of pocket joke gets thrown his way, he takes it in stride,
never seeming put off.

(When he offers to start walking Kunikuzushi home, for the first time in his life, he consents to
social interaction.)

"Fucking bullshit, how was I supposed to know lactobacillus makes yoghurt? Why is she putting
questions on the test if she's never taught us the damn answer!?"

Kazuha laughs into his palm. It's a melody. "Kuni, you got one question wrong. Stop complaining."

"I hate Ms Sara with a searing passion."

"You hate our classmates, then our teachers. Really, is there anything you don't hate?"

"No. I hate the entire damn world," he glares, and then turns around, looking their shabby
Inazuman highschool up to down. "And one day, I'm getting the fuck out of this place."

"You're studying overseas?" It's actually scary how good Kaedehara's getting at maneuvering these
conversations.

"Yea."

"Where?"

"Wherever the fuck I can get."

"What about your family?"

"No dad. Hope my mom burns."

Kaedehara stops in his steps. He looks at Kunikuzushi with a sort of horrified expression, and, not
for the first time, Kuni thinks he's finally done it. He's finally showed Kaedehara the part of
himself too ugly to be accepted. He waits for the but she's your mother or but she loves you.

But instead, what he gets is Kaedehara's merciful voice breathing, "I'm sorry," and then arms
around him wrapped tight.

He stiffens, unsure what to make of this.. gesture. How long has it been since he was last held?
Actually, how long since he last let anyone hold him without slicing off three fingers?

"I don't need your pity," he says.

" It's not pity, " Kaedehara pulls back, frustrated gesturing, "It's- that's- I don't have parents either."
Kunikuzushi gaped. You don't get it: Kaedehara was the pretty boy. He'd always just assumed he
had the perfect life to match his perfect everything else. "You don't?"

"No. So, I don't wanna say I understand but, just," He balled his hands into fists. "I feel like you
could maybe understand me ."

Kunikuzushi stared. No, really, he just stared.

What the hell else could he have done? He was sick of people telling him they understood, people
only befriending him out of pity. But this boy who lived in the spotlight, in a whole other world
from Kunikuzushi's dark shadowy corner of the classroom- to think that someone like Kuni could
ever mean something to someone like Kaedehara?

"..You put too much faith in me," he said. And then walked off, face hidden behind his long hair.

Kunikuzushi slams his hands against the keys of the piano.

He hates her, oh, he hates her so much. He wishes someone would come along and stab a knife
through Ei's stomach. Rip her teeth out with a pair of old pliers. Kill her, and make it painful.

Kunikuzushi would laugh at her funeral. He promises.

( I understand, she would say, We are creatures cut from the same cloth. I am your mother. Of
course I understand, with that pretty violet smile that was almost enough to make Kunikuzushi
believe her. And then she'd turn around, wreck his life, and leave him in the rubble to pick himself
up.

That was her favourite thing to do: Abandon him. )

He pressed harder on every note. The music ragged and earsplitting, beautiful in a brutal kind of
way. Feels like he could do this forever, pour his rage into music and wield it like a knife. What
stops him is the creak of the door behind him, and he tenses up.
This is a school piano. It's like, the only cool thing about his shabby high school. And at school,
he's supposed to be the quiet kid. That piano playing? Was not quiet.

He turns, fearing for his life and reputation, and then sees crimson eyes and a white ponytail and
relaxes. "Oh, it's just you."

"...You didn't tell me you played piano," Kazuha breathes, and he sounds a little more.. breathless?
Than usual?

"It's not that big of a deal," he says, but Kazuha's looking at him all wide-eyed so he adds, "I also
play guitar and drums."

"Kuni!" he rushes up to him, beaming hard and cupping both his hands around one of
Kunikuzushi's, "You're a sensation!"

And then, out of fucking nowhere, "Form a band with me!"

Kunikuzushi blanches. "What!?"

"Please? I need to hear that again!"

"Why the hell would I-"

"Come on, please? Please?"

Kunikuzushi gave him one mortified look and then sighed. "You act like a damn child. But sure."

"Really?" Even Kazuha seemed stunned. He took a seat on the huge piano seat, next to Kuni. "That
was.. unexpectedly easy."

In truth, Kunikuzushi loved music. There was a reason he learnt three instruments. And Kaedehara
was (though he'd never admit) probably his favourite person in the world. So really, why wouldn't
he form a band with him?

"I want to be a musician," he says. Then meets Kazuha's eye. "Surprised?"

"A little, yea. I thought you'd be like- one of those people who say there's no money in music, get a
real job."

Kunikuzushi laughed. He hadn't laughed in so long, it felt weird to, even for just a moment.
"Sounds like something I'd say. What about you?"

"I wanna be a dancer," he glanced at Kunikuzushi, and mimicked him with a giggle, "Surprised?"

"Very."

He was waiting for the elaborate explanation, the tragic backstory as to why someone with grades
and a future like Kaedehara wanted to dance. But he just put his fingers on the piano, and started
playing Twinkle Twinkle.

A melody, beautiful in a soft and serene way. Nothing like Scaramouche.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Kaedehara asked, still playing. About what you were doing earlier,
when I caught you practically abusing this piano?

Kunikuzushi flopped onto his side, resting his temple on Kazuha's shoulder. "Not really," he
decided. Because what could he even have said?

Ei slapped him on rare occasions. Other than that, she never laid a hand on him. So he couldn't
even claim abuse, especially since she was a woman. There was nothing he could claim at all.

"Okay," was all Kazuha said. As if it really was all okay. And he continued playing for
Scaramouche.

.
"The Calm and The Storm."

"What?"

"Do you want that to be our Band Name? The Calm and The Storm."

He regarded Kazuha for a long moment and then broke out into a smirk, "Shit, that's perfect."

( "Why do you want to be a musician, Kuni?"

"I don't just want to be a musician. I want to make it big. The biggest star this world will ever
fucking see. And then the first thing I do will be getting out of this place. All on my own. With the
money made with my own bleeding, callused hands- not my mother's. Not anyone else's."

Kaedehara smiles. "Good luck," he whispers. Now there is someone in the world who knows and
supports his dreams. That's a first. )

They spend hours everyday coming up with song concepts. They both agree to have one individual
song each, Kazuha's titled The Calm and Kunikuzushi's titled The Storm.

One is a harmonious melody and the other heavy metal, but the lyrics parallel each other. Two
songs, different in every possible way meet in the middle and they just.. work. Like a glitch in the
matrix, a flaw in the system. He and Kazuha shouldn't work, but they do. They do so well.

Kaedehara was his missing puzzle piece. The last line to every song he'd written. The hand that fit
into his. Kaedehara was his person.
.

Ms Sara catches them after school one day, loitering in class, music sheets splayed across a desk.
They were supposed to do this at the park, but per Inazuman weather, the rain was keeping them
in.

Kunikuzushi expects to be chased out, but Sara only leans her head against the doorframe, arms
crossed and uncharacteristically fond smile. "You two have really gotten close, hm?"

Kaedehara tenses. There's something between them and Kuni picks it up instantly. "Miss."

"You know, I was so worried about you Kuni. Your whole first year I didn't see you speak to
another person. But it's such a relief to see Kazuha managed to befriend you. " She smiles at
Kazuha then, the way you'd smile at a kid who fulfilled a task you'd assigned them.

"Yes Miss," Kazuha bows his head, shame curtling in his expression. Fuck , he was gonna be sick.

Sara smiles at him again, wholly satisfied and then closes the class door. The moment she's away
Kunikuzushi sits up, "So that was what this was."

"Kuni-" Kazuha reaches for his arm just as fast as Kuni slaps him off.

"Screw you," he says. And for the first time, he isn't angry. There's no fight left in him to scream.

( I want to die, he thinks, I wish I was dead. I wish I was dead. I wish I was- )

He's already packing his shit and leaving, ignoring Kazuha's pleas as he chases him down the
hallway. Kunikuzushi walks into the gruelling downpour and doesn't even hesitate. Right now,
he'd honestly take getting struck by lightning over looking Kazuha in the eye.

He should've known. That day when Kazuha came up to him and said he didn't need anything. And
he thought he was just nice. He should've known nobody ever comes up to him unless there's
another reason, like a teacher telling them to.
"God, please, just hear me out-"

His face is wet and he doesn't know whether it's from rain or tears. When Kazuha rushes in front of
him and their eyes meet, he wonders if he ever knew this person at all.

(There's a wall between them now, the wall Kunikuzushi used to tear down for him and only him.)

"I swear it wasn't like that," Kazuha says between panting gasps and the loud clatter of rain, "Well-
okay, it might've been at first-"

"Was it fun?" Scaramouche cuts him off, "You had me completely fooled. Are you happy with
yourself?"

"I wasn't-"

"Were you ever even gonna tell me?" Pain bleeds into the cracks of his voice now.

Kunikuzushi thought he knew pain. He'd already been abandoned by his mother, surely the
universe would give him a break. Turns out shit hurts a lot more when the one who betrays you is
the one you trust.

(Once upon a time, Kuni lay his head in Kaedehara's lap and wrote odes to the boy's name.)

Whoever those two best friends were are gone now. Maybe they were never even real. The rain
washes it all away, and Kuni thinks in that moment the sun might never rise again.

"I'm sorry," is what Kazuha ends up saying. As if that could possibly fix the fragments of whatever
they once shared. "It wasn't all fake. I mean it."

Kunikuzushi takes one look at the boy who was a few moments ago his everything, and now he
just wants to break it. He's pretty sure hurting Kazuha will vicariously hurt himself, but really,
when has Kunikuzushi ever cared about that?
"I don't believe a single thing you have to say," he says, then really drives it home. "I never want to
see your face again."

He walks past Kazuha and leaves.

Their band and the piano chair they shared and the smile Kunikuzushi never showed anyone else
and the crimson eyes against lavender ones and their elaborate nicknames and the chair Kazuha
pulled up to his desk and the report card and all of it. He rewinds to the moment they met and
deletes every memory that comes after.

He leaves Kazuha behind.

This is his thirteenth reason. He was already on the edge, and then the cosmos gave him Kazuha
and for a brief moment Kunikuzushi thought everything would be alright. Because Kaedehara was
his person. They were going to be okay.

But maybe the universe wanted him to die. Maybe he was never meant to live. Kazuha's gone and
the worst part is he was never real in the first place.

There is no beautiful memory to reminisce on. Every single one is stained in betrayal and hurt and
the lie Kazuha told the very first time they met, when he went up to Kunikuzushi because of a
teacher's request and pretended he genuinely wanted to know him.

He cries so hard that night his eyes puff up, his throat gives out, his breath races. He throws
pillows across the room and tears stuffed animals apart. Nothing helps. Everything still hurts. He
cries and cries and cries.

He skips school the next day. Ei's doing who knows what at work all day so she'll never find out.
He's splayed across the living room couch (a privilege reserved for when Ei's gone out) when his
doorbell rings. Bedhead and hoodie and all, he answers.

"Kaedehara?"

"Kuni," he says, like the name is the most precious thing in the world. The umbrella fights against
the rustle of wind in the heavy rain. The sky's still bright blue. Kazuha should be at school. He
considers slamming the door in this asshole's face until- "I'm in love with you."

A beat. "What."

"Miss Sara did ask if I could try and talk to you that day," he confesses. Desperation bleeds into his
tone, a sort of puppy-eyed expression on his face. "But she never told me to walk you home after
school, start a band with you, call you Kuni-- I didn't do what I did because anyone else asked me
to. I did it because I had a massive crush on you."

Kazuha flushes, ducking a little under his umbrella. "And I know it's hopeless, I knew way back
then that you had no interest in romance whatsoever, let alone in me. But you were so- you- how
was I supposed to not fall in love?"

"And I also know you're furious with me. And you needn't forgive me in the slightest. But if you're
going to leave, I'm going to do everything in my power to make you stay, because I don't want to
lose you Kuni. You're not the same to me as everyone else. You're my person. And if you want the
truth; it's that I've always been in love with you."

The sun rises past the rain. Kunikuzushi only notices now, cradled under the umbrella is a bouquet.
Holy shit, Kazuha ran to his house in this weather and still had the time to buy him flowers.

How childish. How stupid. Why was Kuni smiling so damn hard?

"You absolute idiot, get in!" he yelled, tugging Kazuha by the arm.

(Kazuha loved him. Kazuha loves him.)

He clicks the door shut behind them, setting Kazuha down on the couch and turning off all the
aircons. The boy's socks are soaked. Kunikuzushi rushes to find him new ones + a hoodie + warm
tea.
Kazuha just sits there, a confused puppy with an expression of absolute bewilderment on his face.

"Well?" Kunikuzushi glares, "Are you just going to sit there or are you gonna drink it?"

"Ah- um.. yea." He ducks downward, face the wildest shade of red. Shit, that was cute.

Kunikuzushi sighs fondly, takes a seat next to him, wonders what on Earth he did to deserve this
beautiful person's love.

"I'd be a horrible boyfriend," he says. "Just snap your fingers and ten girls could fall at your feet,
all much better than me."

Kaedehara frowns. And he says, like it's the simplest truth in the universe, "I don't want better, I
want you."

A love song gets added the to the track list of The Calm after The Storm's album.

Kunikuzushi, in typical Kunikuzushi fashion, hated love. It was soft and sweet whilst he was
sharp-edged and bitter. He lived sixteen years thinking he was unfit for it.

Then Kazuha walked into his life and Kunikuzushi had never wanted to be gentle until then.

Of course, he was still Kunikuzushi. Being boyfriends did not mean he suddenly knew how to
handle compliments or engage in skinship. Love didn't fix his raging mommy issues. But it was
nice. It was like despite how shitty the world continued to be, if Kaedehara would sit next to him in
a garage and spend a minute with him everyday, all the suffering would be worth it.
He had lived his whole life without sunlight. Now that he'd tasted it, he knows why every human
stayed alive- why they cried and screamed and agonized- for its few warm moments.

"I hate guitars," he said. The indented lines on his calluses started to bleed out.

Kazuha rolled his eyes with what could only be called hopelessly smitten fondness. "You hate
everything, Kuni."

"Because everything sucks," he said. And then his eyes trailed to the side, to that smile on
Kaedehara's face and... "Except you."

Kaedehara confessed with the L word that rainy day at his doorstep, but Kunikuzushi hadn't yet.
(Was love even tangible for a creature like him?) Maybe this was the closest he would ever get.

Kazuha flushed, wide-eyed, and then turned away. "Go back to playing your damn guitar," he
mumbled.

The following four years would go on to be the best years of his life.

As if, after sixteen years of falling short, the universe finally chilled the fuck out. It was years
starved of happiness all condensed into a few months, and for the first time, Kunikuzushi did not
want to throw himself off a cliff.

"Mother says I can't release an album under my name. Says it's bad for the family reputation."

"Oh."

"But so long as people don't connect my stage name with the Raiden Bloodline it's all fine."
Kaedehara sighed, shoulders relaxing, "Oh, okay. What name do you want?"

"....Scramsh," he mumbled.

"Hm?"

"Scaramouche."

He knew it was a stupid name when he chose it. A reference to a song and not at all Inazuman. If
he told anyone else in the world, awkward faces and judgement would be all he was given back.

But of course this was Kaedehara, so he tilted his head, asked what it meant, and ultimately smiled
that same smile Scaramouche fell in love with as he said, "How nice. It suits you."

Scaramouche wanted to kiss that smile off his face.

Both Scaramouche and Kaedehara lack a real parental figure to impose curfew on them, so after
school they pay for whichever bus fare they can afford and go where the road takes them.

One day it's a beach, Kazuha knee-deep in the sea, humid air sticking to their skin, hair blown back
in the wind and sunkissed features and for a moment he is not human to Scara's eyes.

The next it's raindrops dripping down the bus window, Kazuha's head on his shoulder whining
about the freezing weather and Scara's hoodie over his skin.

At the heart of all their adventures is a song. They've been working on their debut album for almost
a year now, slowly piecing itself together.
There's a sandcastle in their songs and a familiar bus driver. There's running in the rain and
laughing till your lungs hurt. Whatever The Calm After The Storm ends up being will be what
Scaramouche feels when he looks at Kazuha; it'll be love.

"I love you," Scaramouche says.

It comes out surprisingly easily. The three words that mortified him all his life, that he both craved
and wanted to run far, far away from; they weren't all that scary when it was for Kaedehara.

(How could it be scary when it was so soft and sweet and simply just the truth?)

They were in Kazuha's garage, empty monster cans and lyric sheets littered everywhere. He was
singing one of the very few lovey-dovey lines Scaramouche had allowed while trying to figure out
the guitar's strumming pattern. He struggled super hard for a minute, then he got it, and he started
playing flawlessly, eyes glazed over as if the lyrics really were something he'd say to his boyfriend
and Scaramouche just- said it.

And then the music stopped.

Kaedehara stiffened completely, blinked, snapped his head toward Scaramouche and looked all of a
sudden completely out of place. "What- did you just-"

"Sorry- nevermind, forget it-"

"I can't just f-"

"I take it back."

"No," Kaedehara smiled, something scarily excited working through him, "You said you loved
me."
Scaramouche gulped, flushing. "So what if I did?"

"You love me," he breathed.

"...Go back to your damn guitar."

Calm After the Storm releases just after their end of second year exams.

The Calm After the Storm

Album • 2022

The Calm After the Storm

♡ ▶️

1. Hey! - banger opening with a spoken word verse that perfectly encapsulates their dynamic.
2. The Calm - a silly little melody sung and written by Kazuha alone
3. The Storm - hilariously inappropriate death punk mental sung and written by Scaramouche
alone
4. Dreamer - an ode from Kazuha to a boy with big dreams
5. Mother
6. Resident Pretty Boy - 3 whole minutes of Scaramouche basically hitting on Kaz. one of the
lyrics is literally "so if you're tired of being so perfect all the time, why not sleep... with me?"
7. Ours - a song about all the meaningless things theyve turned into theirs. like beaches and
park swings and music.

The album breaks 200 streams and then dies down. Not that it matters. They wrote this album for
each other. The rest of the world didn't need to listen; music was theirs .

.
"I'm seventeen now," Kazuha says.

He's laid hands over his stomach across the couch, with Scaramouche leaning against its seat (as
opposed to sitting on it, y'know, the purpose of a couch) when he breaks the news. Scaramouche's
head snaps in his direction. "You didn't tell it was your birthday?"

"I didn't want anything," he laughs. The look of utter offense on Scara's face is a little (very) cute.
"But I have been thinking."

Scaramouche turns, resting his chin on the seat and allowing Kazuha's fingers to card through his
bangs. He wonders if he knows just how crazy every little movement he makes drives him. "About
what?"

"Most idols start training at thirteen. I dance, but, I'm gonna have to start getting professional soon
if I want to debut."

It's no secret that the future terrifies him. Kaedehara values freedom. And- well- idol companies
aren't exactly known for that. Dancing is a dream he's willing to make more than a few sacrifices to
pursue, but...

"You'll be fine," Scaramouche rolls his eyes and nuzzles into the touch. "Isn't the most important
thing to these agencies that you're good-looking enough for girls to throw themselves at?"

That is an insanely disrespectful depiction of Kaedehara's ambition, but "Are you calling me
attractive?"

Scaramouche freezes, "NO."

There are some days fear gets the better of him.

He is only sixteen after all, and sixteen-year-olds are supposed to have mothers. When he comes
home and she's already sitting there, beckoning him onto the couch, smiling as if she loves him and
wouldn't rip him apart if he wasn't moulded to the exact son she wanted him to be-- and imagining
Kaedehara's voice isn't enough to calm his nerves--

There are still those days. Where he has to sit in the shower and leave the clothes on the floor and
hide under the covers because existing is too hard. But those days, he holds Kaedehara a little
tighter and gets through them. He thinks if Kazuha stays he'll be able to keep getting through them
for two more years.

"Never leave," he says. It's a demand, one made with utter seriousness (even though Kazuha gives
him that fond look that definitely doesn't seem like he's taking it seriously.)

"You couldn't get rid of me even if you tried." Kaedehara holds him a little tighter and
Scaramouche thinks about how sad it'd be if he wasn't alive anymore. If they couldn't be there for
each other.

He's never wanted to live more than he's wanted to live for Kazuha.

Kazuha signs up for a dance program. Scaramouche buys him food after every rehearsal. If one or
two or eighty videos of his boyfriend's choreography end up in the Favourites folder of his gallery,
no one needs to know.

The dream of turning eighteen and running away turns out to really just be a dream. Maybe it was
possible a time ago, but in this generation? In this economy? There was no way.

Scaramouche was used to living with a fancy couch and a lavish room and cleaners to do his every
bidding. When your mother is the most influential figure in Inazuma, it's difficult to sneak any
nation else.

"One day," Kazuha tells him. He always knows just what to say.
.

He doesn't dare forget Kazuha's next birthday. Scaramouche is not a sap. But he's also not a
horrible boyfriend. So he plans the horrendously romantic dinner date at a fine dining suite
(mommy's money comes in handy occasionally, he supposes) and buys the bouquet of flowers and
writes the sonnet and does in fact take him to watch the sunset over crashing waves when it's all
said and done.

"You're too much," Kazuha mumbles, red-faced and unused to the affection.

Scaramouche kisses him for lack of better words. He tastes like tea.

Kazuha's always drinking tea lately. Which isn't new, but paired with the eye-bags, it's concerning.
He expresses concern three times and is given three different responses.

You're one to criticize my sleeping patterns, you insomniac you.

I just really like tea. You know that.

Training is always rough when rookies start out. I'm okay.

Scaramouche can't help but feel like he's being lied to every single time.

One of the days he decides to drop by Kazuha's studio, (with boba. He made sure to get something
with absolutely no caffeine) he opens the door to a man yelling down at his boyfriend.

.
Cue Scaramouche fast-walking after Kaedehara down a corridor, a loop of 'It's fine, it's alright, it's
okay's as if, if he says it enough times he can will it into reality.

Scaramouche has always been so open with his problems so it's incomprehensible why Kaedehara
can't just do the same.

They've never fought in all three years of dating. Turns out, they suck at apologies.

Ei brings a woman home. She's pink-haired and hard-eyed and behind his mother's back gives him
downcast frowns. She is perhaps the second worst woman Scaramouche has ever come to know.
He thinks she suits Ei perfectly.

Both he and Kazuha are at the end of their fuse.

Everything be damned, Scaramouche is not missing another one of Kazuha's birthdays. They have
one civil chat. Everything still sucks but they make each other tea. Kazuha offhandedly mentions
he's going to apply for a new idol company, GNSHNMPCT Entertains.

Scaramouche smiles. He says, with utmost pride, "Good."

The rough patch is sealing. Yae's existence has her perks (like forcing Ei to spend less time at the
house.) Kazuha seems happier than ever, knowing he could leave his current agency soon. They've
always loved each other and Scaramouche thinks that no matter how much grief they both have to
untangle on their own sides, in the end, they'll always meet in the middle.

Lumine GNSHNMPCT

Re: Application

Hello, Kaedehara Kazuha.

Your application to GNSHNMPCT Entertains was wonderful. We would be more than welcome to
offer you a place in our company.

However, there is a slight issue. You requested to be located in our Inazuman Headquarters. The
market in Inazuma for idols is oversaturated, and I'm afraid our HQ is full and understaffed. It's
also difficult to import equipment and promote events in such a closed-off nation.

Therefore, I'm offering you the option to come work in our Liyuean Headquarters- which has
higher quality facilities, and since Liyue is so close to both Mondstadt and Sumeru will make your
debut much smoother.

I understand moving so far away from your home nation is a huge step. All expenses will be paid
for, of course. Take your necessary time and get back to me with your decision.

Dancing was a dream Kazuha was willing to make more than a few sacrifices for. But was that
sacrifice Scaramouche?

It's stupid.

He knows it's stupid.

.

Your lifelong ambition or a boy you fell in love with when you were fifteen? This should've been
an easy choice. It should've. But things had just been going so well between them. Kazuha
would've married him if he asked.

Intellectually, he wanted to go. Emotionally, he wanted to stay.

He tells his trainee friends and they all congratulate him. They don't even consider he might want
to stay.

Gorou tells him if he stayed, he'd be insane.

He goes to his parents' grave and asks.

He asks the sakura leaves and stray cats.

He asks everyone except Scaramouche.

Would Scaramouche understand? Maybe he'd say it was alright, that they could still love each
other over the borders and ocean?
Who was he kidding. They couldn't. If there was one thing he and Scaramouche had it was quality
time. Their love was built on teenage freedom and it couldn't survive adulthood.

The news hits Scaramouche like a ton of bricks. Heavy, heavy bricks. There's something in his
throat; betrayal. An emotion he never thought he could associate with Kazuha.

I was supposed to be the one who got out of this hell hole, he thinks, how dare you leave me here
to rot?

Because-- Kazuha never even mentioned leaving-- he loved Inazuma-- and Scaramouche didn't, so
why the hell was Kazuha going to Liyue and not him!?

"We always knew this was gonna happen though," Kaedehara laughs. The nerve of this man to say
something like that, something like yea scaramouche didnt u see this coming? lol. and then to
laugh .

Scaramouche was the cynicist. The one who expected the worst because that was the only way not
to get crushed. He was supposed to be the pessimistic, nihilistic asshole. He was supposed to know
better.

But then Kaedehara barges in with those eyes and that blinding smile and the drop-dead gorgeous
voice and for the only time he lets himself hope. Something so sick like hope.

And now it's all crashing, burning, falling apart. He thought he knew better.

"I didn't," he spat. "I thought you cared as much as I did."

That makes Kazuha frown. "Cared?" he nods, like a challenge, "You're the one who doesn't care."

"I love you and you're leaving. Of course I fucking care!"

"Oh, right, love ," Kazuha drawls the word out with a bitterness he's never heard. It almost feels
wrong. "You claim you love me but turn around and actively don't support my dream. What even
is your definition of love?"

"Am I supposed to just be happy that you're leaving then? You promised not to! "

"I made that promise when we were teenagers! Oh my-" Kazuha huffs, exasperated, "Don't act like
if you had the chance, you wouldn't fly out of Inazuma and leave me too. Stop acting like a victim
when you're just jealous."

He balled up his fists. He wanted to punch something, but Kazuha kept speaking.

"I don't owe you to stay. Certainly not if you're going to react like this, actually, I don't owe you
anything."

Scaramouche was used to being abandoned. He thought he knew its teeth and claws like the back
of his hand.

He thought he had Kazuha figured out too.

Now all those promises are emptied and the memories are burning. Their beaches and playgrounds
and garages. Their report cards and bouquets under umbrellas. It was something, whatever the hell
it was- something that when Scaramouche thought back to he would smile so hard his cheeks hurt.
It was love. It was softness and it was passion and it was theirs . And now it's ruined, stained by
this one fight, and he isn't sure if he hates Kazuha for it- if he could ever hate Kazuha at all.

"Fuck off then," he says. And he's not sure if he's losing the only person who's ever known him,
who ever even tried despite Scaramouche's every attempt to stand in his way, or if he's the one
throwing it all away.

He's not sure how the disconnect between what he says and what he feels can be so far apart. How
he can say Fuck off while his heart bleeds, Please, stay. You're the best thing that's ever happened
to me. You're what wakes me up and soothes me to sleep.

"I don't need you."

I can't do this without you.

"I don't even care anymore."

 I can't go on without you.

"Go wherever the hell you want and don't come back."

Don't leave me like this.

Chapter End Notes

GIVE ME A WEEK TOPS ILL HAVE THE SECOND CHAPTER OUT I PROMISE

"this is abt them as celebrities" and then the whole first chapter is backstory im sorry

also i havent written angst in a long time you can tell my writing skills are slipping
 We're in a Getaway Car
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Scaramouche was doing pretty good for himself.

That’s what he thinks, staring at his $30k gaming setup, all flashing lights and custom-made. The
stream starts in 5 minutes, 12pm Inazuman time. Some things don’t hurt anymore, but that sure as
hell still does.

In typical influencer fashion, here’s an update!

1. He’s still in Inazuma. Sorry fifteen-year-old him, the universe still detests you.
2. It’s hard to quantify fame but among Twitch streamers; Scaramouche is at the top. (Okay,
well, Childe’s fanbase outnumbers his by a landslide but Childe is also an idol and actor and
married to The Morax, so that's hardly a fair comparison)
3. Still filthy rich! Some things never change!
4. Over the course of his adulthood, he'd kissed girls. Realized he didn’t like that and kissed
boys. Realized he didn’t like kissing anyone that wasn’t his ex (on the contrary, he abhorred
it) so he’s single. Can't get into controversy if there's nothing for the internet detectives to
dig up.
5. And finally, you can rest-assured nineteen-year old, sobbing and utterly inconsolable
Scaramouche. I know your greatest fear is forgetting Kaedehara’s voice, but trust me, he’s
fucking everywhere. On your Spotify Wrapped! In your Shampoo ads! The billboard right
outside your window! (And even if he wasn’t, you still hear him in your most hauntingly
beautiful nightmares)

The stream loads to a start and, as per tradition Scaramouche goes, “You have one minute to
submit questions.”

He doesn’t like when his chat box in the beginning of a stream is overloaded with Hiiiiii s and
Hello Scara! s so this is how he gets the ball rolling. It also gets him crazy high view counts since
people join as soon as they see the notification, hoping their question gets noticed.

The first question pops up, and he swears he must’ve done something in a past life to warrant this
much of a grudge from the universe.

Scara. when was your last relationship?

Avid fans know Scaramouche absolutely despises romance. Which means this is a new fan. Which
means he has to play nice.

“Four years ago,” he says, and God, four years ago. He’d known, subconsciously, that time was
flying by, but saying it aloud was some serious perspective.

Four years , he thinks, it’d been four whole damn years. So why was Scaramouche still right
where Kaedehara left him?

It was pathetic. He had wanted three things: to pursue music, to leave Inazuma, and Kaedehara.
Not only did he fall short of all three, but his ex was the most beloved person in the entire world. ‘
Scaramouche was doing pretty good for himself ’? Bullshit.

Scara, r u going to the Teyvat Awards?

The Teyvat Awards are exactly what you’re picturing. A fancy event where famous people go to
collect prizes for being the most famous. He wants to snort, but he’s one of the nominees.

“Hmm..” His tone drips sarcasm. “Do I really wanna fly all the way out to Liyue to lose to
Childe?”

its not like u cant afford the trip

You won’t lose! Have faith!

at least hes self aware lol…

to bffr; i voted for childe:p

“Hah,” he sighs. In truth, he does love travelling. An escape from Inazuma, even temporarily, is
still an escape. He knows Childe’ll be there (Childe takes every excuse to see Zhongli he can) and
although he'll deny it till his dying day, Scaramouche does miss the rascal. “I’ll think about it.”

Scaramouche does not like to think about the state he plunged into after Kaedehara left. Mostly
because if he does, he tends to fall back into that state.

(Whoever said time heals all wounds is a liar. Four years and the mere notion of Kaedehara still
throws him into a spiral. Pathetic, pathetic, pathe- )

At first, it was everything at once. Hated himself and hated the world. Wanted to die and wanted to
kill. A lot of starting fights and breaking plates and yelling. Every little thing set him off.

But the worst part was what came after: nothing. Numbness. Laying in bed and replaying every
moment he ever spent loving Kazuha in his head, like some sort of movie, like he could change the
ending if he just kept watching. Sitting in showers and standing on high ledges and forgetting how
it felt to smile. Abandoning music, abandoning everything that once made him happy. And I’d like
to tell you afterward it gets better, he heals, he traverses new mountains and gets over Kazuha– but
he doesn’t.

Scaramouche wanders the next four years of his life like a lost spirit; a shell of the boy he once
was.

His life did not revolve around Kaedehara. It was Kaedehara. Unhealthy as it seems, he was
brought to life when that manilla card slid across his desk and he looked up and their eyes met,
crimson on violet. Every moment before then was just preparation for that day.

Kaedehara was the air he needed to breathe, and now there was no Kaedehara.

In his weakest moments, Scaramouche thinks it may be his fault. No matter how many times he
rethinks all their minute interactions and concludes his reaction was totally justified, he can't make
it go away by making Kazuha into a villain. So Scaramouche thinks maybe he's the problem,
maybe this is just destiny, maybe his fate was always to end up like this: abandoned and alone.

The nights he dreams of two people at a piano he convinces himself they're strangers, they're
Romeo and Juliet, they just so happen to be raven and dove haired.
.

The faceless watchers in his chat like to joke that they can fix him. Scaramouche doesn't know
quite how to say, Please, I will fall to my knees and beg. I was broken four years ago and I've been
a million, inconsolable pieces ever since. If you can somehow put me back together, do it, because
the only way I know how is a key that's shaped the same as the hole in my heart.

He gets through it by pretending.

He learns to live with the hole in his heart. If it's shaped like maple leaves and pianos and a fucking
report card ( Oh Archons ,to think all this heartache could've been avoided if someone else just
passed him that fucking report card) –he'll pretend it isn’t there.

He thinks that's a pretty good analogy for what he's been doing the past four years; pretending
Kaedehara is not there.

Childe says he’ll let Scaramouche crash at his house if he comes to The Teyvat Awards, which is a
suspiciously kind offer, but Childe is a stupidly kind person. Scaramouche knows what kind people
look like, because it’s whatever the opposite of him is. And there’s no one he opposes more than
Childe.

Scaramouche doesn’t get jet lag. He also doesn’t get motion sick. For those very reasons, and
because he hates his mother’s nation, the plane ride to Liyue is the closest thing to heaven possible.

He’ll have to go back. He always has to go back. But just for a while, even if he has to sleep on
Childe’s uncomfortable as hell couch and lose an award to him, just for the briefest moment he
doesn’t want to be under his mother's watch.
.

Scaramouche walks from the main building. It's glowing, string lights and big neon signs as
opposed to the rest of the world shrouded in the dark of night. The security process is a pain. They
ask for his ID, then his name, then the awards he's nominated for, then proof of invitation, then he
has to push his bag through the scanning machine while a stranger feels him up for weapons (and
Scaramouche hates being touched at any capacity) but he's finally let to pass through. He pushes
open the tall, gold-plated and expensive wood doors, and it's like a whole other world in there.

There is laughter and chatter everywhere, pretty people dressed in pretty clothing, luxurious food
and a wide open ballroom. It’s nice, Scaramouche realizes, and he rarely ever thinks anything is
nice. His eyes span the room, and even as an outsider, he sees a few faces from magazine covers
and feels like a star himself.

And then he sees him.

Oh, he thinks, oh.

Everything comes rushing back all at once. The teenage adrenaline-fueled romance and the album
they put their souls into . Everything he’d tried so hard to keep buried for four fucking years just
rises to the surface the moment he sees that crimson colour. He knows it shouldn’t be this
daunting, he shouldn’t be so affected by a boy he barely knows anymore, but he can’t help it.

Kaedehara, his whole chest aches. There you are.

How could he have oversought this? Of course 4nemo would be here! They're only the most
famous boyband of all fucking history. Scaramouche stares for longer than he knows he should, but
how is he supposed too stop? It's him, it's actually him. Not in a music video or on a TV screen, it's
the boy he once loved fully in the flesh. And he's all made up. His hair is in the same low, side
ponytail it's always been in since highschool and his outfit is the only time Scaramouche will ever
admit to Inazuman fashion looking good and-- oh fuck he's beautiful-- OH FUCK HE'S LOOKING
THIS WAY.

Kazuha turns to him. Their eyes meet for a second. Kazuha turns back to his conversation, and then
he blinks, realizing himself, and does a double-take back to Scaramouche.

And this time he actually notices him.

He forgets himself, whoever he was talking to now a blur. The boy across the room is the only
clear thing in the universe.

They gaze at each other like they’ve never seen a single other person before. Shit, what now? A
million questions flood his mind. What terms are we on? Do I go over? Does Kazuha still hate
me? Probably does, right? He’s stunning. Of course he’s stunning he’s an idol, Oh my God right,
he’s a freaking idol–

Scaramouche decides to do the absolute wildest thing in the universe. He smiles. With teeth. And
then awkwardly, nervously, hesitantly, he waves. He hopes that’s enough to convey, We’re cool. (I
miss you too much to be mad anymore.)

Kazuha’s eyebrows blow to the ceiling. He blinks rapidly, mouth falling slightly agape. And then
something miraculous happens. Amongst the sea of people separating them Kaedehara’s lips curl
slightly at the edges, and then he breaks out into a full-blown, unabashed and wide-eyed grin.

Geez, does it make you that happy to see me?

Then there’s someone tugging at Kaedehara’s arm, trying to pull him away but Kaedehara’s eyes
are fixated on him. Good to know he’s not the only one who can’t stop starring.

He watches the boy get dragged away by his group, and Scaramouche walks away too. He starts
looking around for a mob of messy, ginger hair and a stupid face–

“Hey! Hey you!”

Every head in the room snaps around, and to Scaramouche’s horror, the braided pig-tailed turqois
source of annoyance is waving at him.

He points to himself incredulously, stopping in his tracks to let Venti catch up. (Don’t get it
twisted. Scaramouche doesn’t follow most idol groups, but he knows its Venti because Venti’s in
4nemo, and we aren’t getting into why Scaramouche religiously follows 4nemo.)

“I think one of my bandmates is a fan,” he beams, pointing to behind him. It's only now he sees
Xiao walking up to them, and Aether, dragging a protesting Kazuha by the back of his shirt.

“ I’m not! ” Kazuha whines, red-faced and scrambling against Aether’s grip.

“You were staring at him for a whole ten minutes,” Xiao says, matter-of-factly.
“ I wasn’t–!” Three faces all deadpan in Kazuha’s direction, and he realizes this isn’t an argument
he can win so instead tries, “Okay, but not because I’m a fan!”

“Then why?” Venti smirks.

“Well- that’s- er- because-”

“Because we used to know each other,” Scaramouche steps forward, taking pity on the flustered
mess. He tucks a bang behind his ear and smirks, voice going all rough and dark and cocky and
whatever else usually works on his fangirls. “Long time no see, Kaedehara.”

Up close, Scaramouche can pick out all the little details. How his face is remarkably symmetrical,
how his shoulders are a little broader and his voice different from how it sounds in video.

He also, with a devilish satisfaction, realizes he’s just slightly taller than him now. Which is a
damn achievement considering they spent their entire highschool lives with Kazuha towering over
him. That’s it, Scaramouche thinks, I can pack my bags and fly home. There’s no need to win an
award. This is more than enough.

He angles his neck to gaze down at Kazuha, even though he doesn’t truly need to.

“It’s been a while,” Kazuha responds, hands on top of one another placed neatly at his front. “Are
you hoping to win any awards today?”

“Nominated for best streamer,” he says, “But everyone kinda already knows Childe’s got me beat.
So I’m just here to congratulate him.”

“You never know,” he says, eyes wide and hopeful and unfairly pretty.

“Well, easy for you to say,” Scaramouche shrugs toward Kazuha. “The idol thing clearly worked
out for you.”

“Aha… you’re very different as well.”

“Am I?”
“ You are, ” Kazuha says, with a grave emphasis, “You cut your hair. It looks good.”

Scaramouche customarily does not say thank yous, so instead turns to the side, realizing he was so
wrapped up in conversation he failed to notice the three gawking faces glancing between him and
Kazuha. “What.”

Aether looks off to the side, “Nothing, it’s just uh..”

Venti does the same, mumbling, “You could cut their tension with a knife…”

“I think we should leave you two alone,” Xiao says.

“What? Nonono,” Kazuha frantically latches onto him, “You can’t leave me– okay, they left me.”
He chews on his lip, turning to Scaramouche, red-faced. “Hi.”

He takes one look at Kazuha, all glitzy and glammed-up and undeniably beautiful, very obviously
uncomfortable in this situation and forced to speak to him. Even though Scaramouche forgives him
for everything, there's always the factor that maybe Kaedehara doesn’t forgive him. And if that’s
the case, he probably can’t say it for PR reasons, so Scaramouche takes the hint and walks out.

He still has half an hour or so until the Streamer Awards start, and he was planning to spend it with
Childe, but if it’d ease Kazuha, he’ll gladly take a walk outside. And he gets just about out the
fancy automated doors of the building before he feels warmth pooling, clasping around his wrist.

“ Wait!”

Scaramouche turns, wide-eyed with utter confusion splayed across his face. Kazuha looks just as
lost as he does, like he’s got something to say but no way to say it.

“Do you need something?” he asks.

Both of them freeze. It was a totally unintentional utterance. Something asked without really
thinking.

( ‘Do you need something?’ Fifteen-year-old Scaramouche’s harsh gaze and even harsher words
cast on the soft-eyed boy in front of him.
‘Can I not speak to you unless I need something?’

Every day since then Scaramouche lowers his guard for Kazuha and their souls reach each other
in an entirely unique way, a shared understanding that couldn’t possibly be formed with anyone
else in the world. That is until Kazuha left. )

Both of them are instantaneously transported back to that classroom and that moment and that (
stupid fucking) report card. He can see the memory flash in Kazuha’s eyes just as Kazuha can
probably see it in his. But he’ll pretend that it isn’t there, that no grueling heartbreak and prolonged
yearning separation lies beneath this interaction.

We’re just an idol and a streamer who happen to know each other, Scaramouche thinks.

How much will he lie to himself? How long can he pretend before the truth forces it way in,
kicking and screaming?

“No, it’s just.. uhm, where are you going?”

“Why?”

“...Uhm… no reason…”

The painful awkwardness seeped into Kazuha’s expression, and screw it all, he was cute.
Scaramouhe took his wrist, in the same emboldened fashion that Kazuha had clung onto his.

“If you wanted to spend more time with me, you can just say so, Kaedehara.”

Then he’s pulling Kazuha out the doors of the Teyvat Awards, into the parking lot, and giving the
boy his helmet. “Hop on.”

He looks at him bewildered. “I’m sorry?”

“We’re going on a ride.” He gestures to his motorcycle, rented for his stay in Liyue.

“Are you– not going to even explain or ask me or– you know this feels an awful lot like a
kidnapping- I shouldn’t even really be out of that building, my team–”
“And yet you’re putting the helmet on,” he grins, helping Kazuha adjust the straps. Usually
Scaramouche is the one tripping over himself, but when his hands fasten the buckle around
Kazuha's chin, he can feel viscerally the way he gulps. “I thought you were blushing because you
were uncomfortable, but you chased me to the entrance. You wanted to talk to me.”

“It’s been four years,” Kazuha pouts, pointedly looking anywhere but Scaramouche as they help
each other settle onto the cushion motorbike seats. “It’s natural to be a little curious what you’re up
t-”

“You might wanna hold on a little tighter.”

“What–”

Kazuha’s hands, previously rested on Scaramouche’s shoulders, fly around his waist, squeezing
tight for fear of his life when the bike starts speeding up as they reach the main roads. “ You ass!”
he screams. Are idols allowed to curse? If so, he's honoured Kaedehara would break the rules for
him.

The streetlights blare around them, turning to blurs as he and Kazuha zip past.

“Glad to see you’re loosening up,” Scaramouche chuckles, and Kazuha feels the vibrations of it
travel through his arms. “You seem like you got a lot shyer.”

“I didn’t,” he whines, pressing his face into Scaramouche’s back. “It’s only since it’s you.”

If there’s romantic undertones to that sentence, Scaramouche is choosing to ignore it.

“I was so scared you hated me,” Kazuha says it like it’s a confession. “And very guilty for what I
did. Then I saw you, and you didn’t seem mad, so that made me so happy and I guess I got a little
giddy.”

What you did, huh.

Scaramouche was resigned to not bringing it up. Because even after what they had crumbled
beneath their feet, Scaramouche liked Kazuha. Enough to take him on a motorcycle ride at least.
But that didn’t mean he forgave him. That didn’t mean all the shit he had to go through was just
suddenly poofed out of existence.

But he had no right to be mad, did he? Ultimately, Kazuha made a reasonable decision. He was just
bitter because he got his feelings hurt, and that wasn’t a valid reason, but it still hurt.
“We can not talk about it,” Kazuha said. Scaramouche wondered what gave it away, but Kazuha
had always been observant and considerate.

“That’d be preferable.”

“I am sorry though.”

“Don’t say that.”

Kazuha nodded. Scaramouche kept driving, and he realized two things. One: he did not know
where they were going. And two: Kazuha did not ask. He got onto a motorbike with Scaramouche
and trusted that wherever he’d get taken would be somewhere safe.

He didn’t know whether to feel honored or concerned.

“Tell me more about yourself now,” Kazuha says.

“Nothing’s really changed.”

He laughs at that. “Oh, Kuni, ” he says the name so sweetly it aches. “ Everything has changed . ”
His voice cracks amidst the whisper, like this everything is an intangible thing too big to conquer
for both of them. “ I don’t know you anymore. ”

That was something Scaramouche had to come to terms with as well. Not just lamenting the loss of
Kazuha, but lamenting knowing Kazuha at all. His bedsheets probably weren’t the soft, sage green
ones anymore. Maybe his favorite tea had changed from oolong. Little things. Because they used to
know all the little things about each other. If Scaramouche was buying coffee, he’d have someone
to text on the way there, someone to tell all his insignificant infinitesimally tiny things.

Then he saw Kaedehara Kazuha on a TV-screen and it all sort of hit him that he didn’t know this
boy anymore.

It’s a bit relieving to know Kazuha lamented the same.

“I don’t know how to start.”

“Then I’ll ask,” he said, “Why did you give up music?”

A sore subject. It wasn’t as though he could say he relented his passions in need of money, because
let’s be honest: nepotism is crap. With his bloodline and family ties, he could’ve easily gone into
whatever profession he wanted. Streaming isn’t exactly a job you pursue to get rich or please your
mother.

But he wasn’t just going to admit the real reason.

“What about you?” Scaramouche couldn’t help the bitter scoff that escaped him. He really didn’t
want to pick fights, but confrontation was his most fluent language. “Music was supposed to be
ours , but you seemed pretty fine and dandy doing it with anyone else.”

( He remembers the first time Kazuha produced a song. It was in collaboration with a pianist,
Albedo. Scaramouche cleared his desk, quieted his whole house and sat down to listen the moment
it released.

And he was infuriated. Because the melody was sweet, every lyric kicked him straight in the gut, it
was possibly the most beautiful piece of music he’d ever heard and he couldn’t help but think, How
dare you make something so special and do it without me?

Music is ours, ours, ours – he knew everything that was theirs had already died a long time ago. He
knew. He knew, so why did he still feel like this? )

“You’re kidding, right?” Kazuha’s voice snaps him back into the present moment, along with the
street lights and car horns and motorcycle engine revving. “I pursued music precisely because it
was ours.”

Scaramouche blinked.

“It was all I had left of you. How could I abandon it?”

“Oh.” Oh, that’s actually– shit. Scaramouche almost wants to laugh at how stupid it all seems
now.

“We might have to head back soon, by the way. If you don’t want to be late for the Streamer
Award.”

He mulled over it for a second. The sky was so beautifully pitch black, and Kaedehara glowed
under moonlight, and his arms were wrapped around Scaramouche’s torso and it was all too nice to
end now. “..It’s not really necessary. I mean, Childe isn’t waiting on me or anything.”
“I see. I have to be there for the Idol Awards though, otherwise my team will really kill me.”

“Okay."

“Tonight is ours until then,” Kaedehara says. And that shouldn’t make Scaramouche feel so much
anymore, but it does. Aren’t you done calling everything ours? he thinks, Aren’t you done making
promises you can’t keep? But Kaedehara is warm and it’s been four years of whispering his name
into rainy days and hoping he'd just show up on his doorstep with a bouquet of flowers again and
every grudge Scara ever held melts away just for tonight.

“Okay,” Scaramouche says. As if it really all will be okay.

It starts to drizzle. Kaedehara tells him he has a place in mind to seek shelter. He refuses to reveal
where, but points Scaramouche down the roads leading to it.

When they finally approach, it’s a street fair. Lanterns are hung all over, bleeding orange and red
light across the open street. All the stalls have their own tents set up, and customers huddle under
the particularly big ones to evade the rain.

Everything is either on sale or concerningly cheap. It’s nothing like the building they just came
from, with everyone young and dolled-up and wearing million dollar watches. Here, a man stands
by as his grandmother bargains for a jade necklace. A gang of kids are splashing around in
puddles, with no care for the mud or how it’ll stain their clothes. A couple along the very left side
are stopped at a booth, the woman bending down to peer into the mirror, her girlfriend vehemently
praising how the hair pin looks on her.

It’s homely, Scaramouche thinks. Inazuma and Liyue have some bad blood between them, and that
makes him love Liyuean culture more because– Inazuma and Scaramouche also have bad blood
between them.

“Pretty, right?” Kazuha asks. And the glow of the hanging lanterns makes him look like the sun.

“Yea,” Scaramouche says, but he’s looking at Kazuha.

“Let’s go!” Kazuha smiles, and takes his hand, and they step forward into the crowd and then–
Scaramouche’s phone starts buzzing in his pocket.

dumbfuck ginger is calling you.

Scaramouche frowns, accepting the call. “Are you calling to brag–”

“Scara, where are you!?”

He pulls the phone far from his face. Ow. Loud. Childe’s yelling sounds frantic, and absolutely
astonished. “I thought you were coming!? Lumine’s gonna fuck me up, I promised her–”

“I did,” Scaramouche says, “I left early because I had shit to resolve. Also I hope she fucks you up,
it’d be entertaining as hell, but why would Lumine care whether I showed or not? Now can I please
get back to my–”

“ SCARAMOUCHE, ” Childe says. “ THEY ARE GOING TO ANNOUNCE YOUR NAME IN FIVE
MINUTES. DO YOU NEED ME TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU?”

Scaramouche stiffens, eyes going wide, brows hitting the ceiling, jaw falling open, nearly dropping
his damn phone on the wet ground.

Kazuha tilts his head, giving him a look like, What’s up?

Scaramouche just looks at him with an exasperated smile. “Oh geez,” he breathes, hanging up the
phone. “Change of plans, I do have to attend for the Streaming Awards.”

Kazuha blinks. The gears turn in his head, and then he’s smiling wide too. "Congrats."

What is one thing you shouldn’t do? Speed. When do you not do it? In the dark or in the rain. And
how should you especially, really not do it because you could potentially unalive yourself? On a
damn motorbike. Without a helmet. Because you gave your helmet to your ex.

In spite of it all, Kazuha still agrees. ( Are you sure? Scaramouche had asked, and he’d laughed in
his damn face. Am I sure? My team would never let me do this! Drive faster, faster! You’re gonna
be late!! )

Scaramouche is still as careful as possible not to accidentally murder the beloved Kaedehara
Kazuha. The Twitter outrage would be insane. He’d be canceled in his grave.

The whole time Childe is blowing up his phone with, Are you here yet? Are you close? Lumine can
only be stalled for so long , and the whole time Kaedehara replies for him. (Seriously, he has to
remind him to hold on tight like five times.)

They arrive at the building and security stop them, only for Lumine's megaphoned voice from the
upper-floors to announce, “Streamer of the year goes to… Scaramouche!!!”

The security let them pass without further question.

Scaramouche spam-smashes the elevator buttons, but the damn lift takes ages. He can hear
Lumine’s distant “Scaramouche? Is he not here?” and Kazuha pulls him by the arm into the
stairwell yelling, “It’s too slow, just run!”

“I could’ve sworn he was coming…”

He pants in gasping breaths.

“Maybe he went for a smoke break?”

He’s a streamer, not an athlete for Shogun’s sake!

“Ah, I guess we have to move on–”

“I’m here!”

They burst open the stairwell doors. His heart is going to beat out of his damn chest. They’re both
soaking wet from the rain, except Kazuha’s hair, flawless as ever since it was under a helmet. The
entire room of heads snap in their direction, utter confusion at why a streamer and an idol were
seemingly in the rain together.

But then the traveller chimes, “You’re here!” and happily beckons him onto the stage. And Childe,
from the crowd screams, “You aren’t beating me next time!” and Kaedehara starts clapping,
everyone starts clapping, and–

Scaramouche hates attention and fame and likes to act like he’s above all this nonsense, but… just
this once, he’ll admit it feels kind of good. As he takes steps onto the grand stage and it’s like the
whole world is proud of him, ( there are people who are proud of me, take that, Ei) he realizes why
most celebrities are so grateful for their fans.

He’s being handed a mic and for a moment, all he can do is just stare. At the audience. All these
nameless people who have their own pasts and futures and have made a name for themself, and all
of these individuals are celebrating for him.
“I left cause I– wait, can I curse?” he looks at Lumine and she giggles, giving him a thumbs-up, the
crowd laughing. “I left cause I thought Childe was gonna fucking win and I didn’t feel like getting
my ego bruised. Then turns out.” He gestures to himself, mouth agape, voice still breathless with
astonishment. “Here I am.”

The crowd woops and woos.

“I fucking– geez– I thought Childe was gonna win so I didn’t even prepare a speech and also I’m
freezing –” He talks without really thinking, and the rain water is finally starting to sink into his
skin.

“I’m not gonna say Thank You because everyone else has probably said that and I’d like to be
unique, thank you very much. Oh I just fucking said it– okay, you know what!? I am thankful. To
hell with being different; I’m so thankful I will wear cat ears in my next stream if it’s what you all
want. Thank you to my fans, thank you to Childe, no thanks to my mom, and thank you to Teyvat
Awards.”

He bows.

It’s not the best speech. It’s vulgar, and messy, and contradicts itself a million times. It’s also
humiliating (he can’t believe he publicly acknowledged he was grateful to Tartaglia) and he was
dripping on the entire stage– but it’s raw. It’s Scaramouche, pretending to be nobody else, in the
flesh. And that’s who the fans voted as their Streamer of The Year.

Me, he thinks. Solely me. Not because I have Raiden blood or because I put on a fake persona or
any other excuse. This award is mine.

4nemo has won 3 Idol Awards and they’re nominated for the last one. Xiao, Venti, Aether and
Kazuha have barely even left the stage, preparing to walk back up onto it. When Lumine unfolds
the paper, she laughs out a sigh and turns back to them, “Give it up for, once again, 4nemo!”

And then they’re up on stage, not much else to say considering this is the fourth time they’re being
handed the mic, but in the middle of it all, someone calls Kazuha.

The sound of his ringtone makes Scaramouche go white.

Resident Pretty Boy, don’t you ever get tired? Of being what everybody wants to see?

Kazuha gasps, scrambling for his phone. Scaramouche’s own voice, still untouched by puberty and
full of teenage fuckboi charm, keeps playing over the speakers.

Resident Pretty Boy, if you’re ever tired, why not come and sleep with m–

He declines the call and everyone’s cackling. Venti’s doubled over, giggling uncontrollably. Aether
nearly chokes on his laughter and his sister has to make sure he’s okay. Kazuha looks like he’s a
second away from spontaneously combusting. Xiao looks like he’s heard this song before, and yea,
that makes sense, because they’ve been bandmates for really long. Wait, but does that mean–

Scaramouche gapes, and whispers to nobody in particular, “ How long has that been his
ringtone!?”

dumbfuck ginger

about

staying at ur place

for my stay in liyue

i actually dont need to anymore

wtf ur leaving me??

WHERE ARE U GONNA GO THO

oh

OH

KAEDEHARA KAZUHA?

no

why would you even think that thats so stupid ur so stupid

.
 did we really look like a couple

bursting through the doors together both soaking wet?

no definitely not scara

i do that w my homies all the time

ok fuck off

aaaaa

I despise you.

you thanked me

im the only name-drop in your entire speech

no i didnt

i was talking abt someone else not everything is abt you

do u have proof

youtube.com/watchTheTeyvatAwardsStreamerOfTheYear

IT WAS A MOMENT OF WEAKNESS

GOODNIGHT

gn scara scara

enjoy hooking up with kaedehara<3~~~~~~~~~~~

The receptionist at Wangshuu Inn gives Kazuha an eyebrow raise as he takes Scaramouche up to
his room. It makes Scaramouche feel a little special, because that means Kazuha probably doesn’t
bring many girls home. (No, wait, why did he even care? Childe was wrong. This was not a hook-
 up and not romantically charged in anyway whatsoever)

“There’s only one bed,” Kazuha says, unlocking the door. “But it’s big. Is that okay?”

Scaramouche’s relationship with physical contact was weird. He was both excruciatingly touch-
starved and excruciatingly touch-repulsed at the same time. Depraved of it all his childhood, the
longing for it became an innate part of him. It would be there constantly, simmering beneath the
surface, and then some nights it would bubble up and suffocate him completely.

It was simple: Hold me. Get the fuck away from me. Do not come close. I will push you away. But
also what would it feel like to be held in Kaedehara’s embrace, to fall asleep in those arms? So
disgustingly gentle. So mercifully wrong.

It’s 4 fucking AM. Too late (or early) to be contemplating this.

“It’s fine.”

Vaguely, he thinks to himself, he probably shouldn’t share a bed with his ex who he hasn’t stopped
thinking about for four years when he knows he’s returning to Inazuma in a week.

But he’s also exhausted, and the room smells like mint and maple, and the bed is soft like all hotel
beds are and–

He concedes to thinking about it in the morning. Between them both, they’ve won five awards and
deserve a good fucking night’s rest.

(He passes out in Kazuha’s arms and has the best sleep he’s had for months.)

Chapter End Notes

i said this fic was gonna be 2 chapters. and then. i wrote the reunion scene. and i
realized "oh my god theres no way i can fit the ending into one chapter" SO YOU
GUYS HAVE ANOTHER WEEK OF WAITING TO DO, IM SORRY

how many taylor swift references have u counted so far? BE ON UR TOES

 please don't ever become a stranger
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

The next morning, Scaramouche is awoken by the assaulting sunlight blaring through sheer floral
windows with maple leaf imprints sewn in– and his phone non-stop buzzing in his pocket. He goes
to sit up, only to feel himself held down, unfamiliar warmth shrouding him, and the rising and
falling of Kaedehara’s chest against his back.

For a moment, he thinks he’s still dreaming. But then last night comes back to him in panging
flashes and fuck, oh fuck, what was he thinking?

He turns. Kaedehara’s morning sunkissed sleeping face is angelic and borderline surreal but
Scaramouche doesn’t get to admire it long before he’s also shuffling, eyes blinking awake. “Oh,”
he says, and then a loopy smile sprawls across his face, “Hi Kuni.”

Lost for words, Scaramouche goes to check the buzzing in his pocket.

Twitter

99,999 notifications

Twitch

99,999 notifications

Instagram

99,999 notifications

“Shit.”

Trends for you

Gaming | Sports | Entertainment • Trending

#KaedeharaKazuha

#Scaramouche

#TheTeyvatAwards

Ilovekeqing • @ilovekeqing

no bc WHAT happened at the teyvat awards

[ Attached: The viral image of Scaramouche bursting through the stairwell

doors, soaking wet, Kaedehara Kazuha appearing behind him. ]

Erusane • @yuiicall

this feels like when two completely separate brands collaborate. i didnt think these universe were
connected.

Venti! ✓ quote tweeted.

deadline • @fighter

HOW HAS AN OFFICIAL STATEMENT NOT BEEN RELEASED YET. WE NEED

ANSWERS PLEASE.

Venti! ✓ • @ventithebard

bestie i swear id tell u if i knew but all of us are just as clueless

Childe ✓ • @tartaglia

STOP ASKING ME U THINK SCARASCARA TELLS ME ANYTHING????

.

Idol News • @chaosgod113

4NEMO Kaedehara Kazuha bursts through stairwell doors in the middle of #TheTeyvatAwards
with Streamer Scaramouche. Official statement yet to be released.

Idol News • @chaosgod113

Guys, there’s been a breakthrough!!

reddit.com/kazuscara

r/kazuscara • 1hr

sok so i know we’re all kinda sorta freaking out at the revelation that untouchable flawless
Kaedehara Kazuha (possibly the most famous man of all time) somehow knows streamer
Scaramouche. (who just won a fucking award for being streamer of the year) im freaking out too.

HOWEVER

YALL ARE OVERLOOKING SMTHN

IK WE’RE ALL GOING CRAZY OVER THEM BURSTING THROUGH THE DOORS
TOGETHER BUT UR FORGETTING ABT THIS:!!!!!

www.youtube.com/42069

above is a clip from when 4nemo accepted their Music Video of The Year award. halfway through
kazuhas phone goes off and reveals a funny and shockingly lewd ringtone. no one seemed to know
the song but i was curious what kinda music my bias listened to so i shazam’d it.

and guys.

shazam brought me to a song called Resident Pretty Boy by The Calm and The Storm. AND
GUESS WHO THE CALM AND THE STORM ARE?? KAZUHA AND SCARAMOUCHE.
I FUCKING KID YOU NOT I PLAYED THE SONG FOR MYSELF AND ITS THE ONE. I
WENT TO THE CALM AND THE STORM’S SPOTIFY AND THE PROFILE PICTURE IS OF
THEM IN HIGHSCHOOL UNIFORMS. AND THEY HAVE A WHOLE FUCKING ALBUM.

i thought i was seeing things but NO. the album was released 7 years ago. nobody recognized the
voice because scaramouche sounds surprisingly different as a teen but its them. they even say each
other’s names in the verse of their first song:

Hey! by The Calm and The Storm

"0:35 ━❍──────── -5:32, ↻ ⊲ Ⅱ ⊳ ↺

VOLUME: ▁▂▃▄▅▆▇

( Catchy instrumental followed by a high-pitched and squeakier version of Kaedehara’s familiar

voice going, Isn’t this too hardcore, Scara?

A voice that sounds like a 12-year-old trying to cosplay as an emo rockstar replies, Shut up,
Kaedehara. )

and if thats not enough for you the icing on the cake, the cherry on the top is that not only were
they childhood friends but childhood lovers.

i mean its not confirmed or anything but Track 8, Ours is a love song if ive ever heard one.
Resident Pretty Boy (the song kaedehara still has set to his ringtone) is just a whole three minutes
of scaramouche hitting on him. Track 4, Dreamer IS JUST KAZUHA SINGING IN THE MOST
GENTLE AND LOVING AND WHIPPED TONE ABT HOW MUCH HE LOVES ‘my dreamer’
I CAN FUCKING NOT BELIEVE THIS WAS HERE FOR SO LONG AND JUST… NO ONE
FOUND IT

kazuha

and scaramouche

idol of all time

and streamer of the year

were dating seven years ago

and whether theyve been dating all this time and hiding it from us or they got back tgt at the Teyvat
Awards or smthn and why the hell they both went out in the rain is still a mystery (we’ll have to
wait for an official statement from them) but as far as ive researched, neither kazuha nor
scaramouche have had any public relationships since 20XX.

⬆️ Upvote

Top Post

shuumongus • @keqingpfp

and they were childhood friends. OH MY GOD THEY WERE CHILDHOOD FRIENDS.

scarabaee • @scarafan

i refuse to believe that scara-ihateloveihateromanceihateeveryone-mouche wrote THIS

[ Attached: a screenshot from Spotify. It’s the lyrics from Ours by The Calm
and The Storm

So don’t you worry

your pretty little mind

You’ll be dancing in the spotlight

All in due time

And one day, everything will be ours. ]

iida • @mygenderismalt37

NO BC THAT SONG IS SO LOVING AND ENCOURAGING AND SOFT AND THEN

RESIDENT PRETTY BOY IS LIKE “anyway wuld u lemme hit ” and
THATS the one kazuha chooses as his ringtone

Aether ✓ • @thetraveller

didnt think id ever say i wanted to be loved like two traumatized teenagers but i want to be loved
like kazuscara

Xiao ✓ • @adeptusxiao

dont talk about romance or the traveller discourse will start

CEO • @ofshittingtears

THE WAY I WOULD FOLD???

[ Attached: from Resident Pretty Boy

This place is a hellhole

I’m burning it down

But you can stay alive

Resident Pretty Boy

Let’s get out of here

Just you and I ]

cynos boyfriend • @cynsbf

they are the definition of “i hate everyone except you” trope

 qkkocch • @qkkocch

sun and moon? i only know kazuscara

The Link Between Kaedehara Kazuha and Scaramou… Click for more.

The Calm and The Storm: an in-depth analysis… Click for more.

Is Kazuscara Real? What Happened at The Teyvat Awa. . . Click for more.

“ Hnnngh ,” Scaramouche verbally cringes, faceplanting into Kazuha’s dining table for the fifth
time. “Why the fuck did I write that.”

“Stop looking, you’ll only upset yourself more.” Kazuha comes in from the kitchen. He insisted on
preparing breakfast while Scaramouche investigates how bad the damage was.

And it was bad. They not only blew up the image of them bursting in, but also Scaramouche’s
embarrassing speech, Kazuha’s ringtone, and the songs they wrote when they were fifteen.
Resident Pretty Boy is actually making charts seven years after release.

“I’m sorry,” Kazuha says. And it truly does sound like he’s sorry, from some deep and soft

place in his heart. He sits in front of Scaramouche and places the tray down, tamagoyaki and miso
soup.

“You’ve got nothing to be sorry for, stupid. It’s just that now the whole world thinks we dated.”
“That’s because we did.”

He rolls his eyes. “Yea, but they think we’re still dating.”

“Well.. are we?”

Scaramouche goes stiff. His grip loosens on his phone and doesn’t seem to care when it clamors
against the ground. His head snaps to Kaedehara.

“ What? ”

“We shared a bed last night,” Kazuha says, picking up a rolled egg, trying to sound casual but the
waver in his voice is a dead giveaway. “We also went on a motorbike ride together in the rain and
exchanged prolonged romantic eye contact a-and you found out my ringtone’s been the love song
you wrote for me for four years all in the span of a night.”

Scaramouche for a long moment just gapes, and then he inhales, exhales, like he’s explaining
something to a child, “Kaedehara, that’s the thing. We’ve known each other one night .”

“Don’t pretend you don’t feel anything for me.”

“I don’t,” Scaramouche lies like muscle memory. He’s been pretending for so long it’s auto-pilot.

“You think I don’t notice everytime I turn to you, you’re already looking at me?”

“That doesn’t mean anything–” Liar, liar, liar “I– I don’t– I can’t –”

“You don’t let anyone close to you except me. I’m not so dense I can’t see the exceptions you make
only when it’s me. I’m special to you,” he stands from his seat, pleading, begging, “ Why can’t you
just admit that!? ”

“You think it’s so easy, don’t you!?” Scaramouche yells back, voice rough. He pulls his legs onto
the chair, hugging his knees. “You have no idea what I had to go through the last time I admitted I
loved you! You have no idea because you weren’t there! You left! ”

There it is. On Kazuha’s face, rising to the surface.

There it is. Guilt .

It shrouds Kazuha’s expression. Shrunken pupils, trembling lips– guilt suffocates him. Because no
matter how valid a reason he had to leave, he still left.

For someone so in love, Scaramouche sure is good at making the man he loves feel horrible.

“I am not going to hand you my heart just so you can throw it aside again,” Scaramouche speaks
through gritted teeth. He isn’t sure what he’s doing anymore. Why he’s hurting Kazuha when all
he wants is to cast his bangs back and watch the boy smile. But he’s enraged, this fury has made a
home inside him for four years and he’s been trying so hard to forgive, to let it pass, to not argue.
But now that Kazuha’s started, it isn’t passing up the opportunity to finally unleash itself.

“You had your chance. You chose to leave and now you’re famous and congratulations for that,
but you don’t get to come back for me.”

He stands from his chair. He looks at Kazuha’s wooden floorboards, breaths in, breaths out. “I’m
going back to Inazuma,” Scaramouche says, and turns for the door.

Kazuha audibly chokes on a sharp intake of breath, flinching harshly. “ No! ”

Then he’s hugging Scaramouche from the back.

Not hug, actually, it’s more of a preventative measure, stopping Scaramouche from making it to the
door. It’s tight, it’s desperate, it’s like if he let go he really truly may never see this person again,
and like that would be a fate worse than death.

“ Nonono please, ” his voice breaks over and over,

interrupted by sniffles and incoherent sobs, “ Please. I don’t know how to make you forgive me.
Please. I’ll do anything. Just don’t leave. ”

Kaedehara’s arms are warm around him, the very same ones that hours ago lulled him to sleep. It
feels nice to be hugged– Scaramouche realizes– by the person you love.

(That’s the thing, isn’t it? Even in the middle of a fight, screaming-crying at each other,
Scaramouche loves Kaedehara. He has for eight years.)

“The last time we left each other, it didn’t end well.” Kazuha squeaks, sobbing uncontrollably into
his back. “So don’t leave me.”

Scaramouche has been called many times by the internet: a heartless creature. Something with no
softness, no vulnerability, only anger and rage and hate.

Scaramouche didn’t think he could cry until now.

“Hypocrite,” he breaths, feeling his eyes well up, the fight leaving his voice, “You’re the one who
left me first.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You’re so selfish.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You broke your promises.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Stop letting me berate you, stupid,” he turns, fists Kazuha’s shirt, “Get mad at me too.”
“No, I’m tired of fighting with you,” Kazuha breathes, “I love you.”

Scaramouche tucks Kazuha’s bangs behind his ear, wipes his snot and tears, looks at the glassy-
eyed boy he’s loved for so much of his life.

And kisses him.

It’s soft at first. Kazuha makes a noise out of shock. Then they keep going, for longer, more
intense, till Kazuha’s hitting at his chest to pull away, I can’t breathe .

When Scaramouche pulls back, their eyes meet. “Me too,” he says. And then they’re kissing some
more.

They go back to that street fair and soak in the morning sun and Kazuha insists they stop by one of
the flower shops to buy Scaramouche a bouquet of the same flowers he’d showed up to
Scaramouche’s doorstep in the rain with when they were sixteen. A few passerbys give them
surprised stares but they’re so smitten they don’t even care.

When they return to Kazuha’s apartment they wash their breakfast dishes together and then lie on
his bed and replay the album they wrote when they were young, dumb and in love, teasing each
other for the cringey lyrics and Kazuha tightening his grip on Scaramouche’s hand when Mother
starts playing.

“Has it gotten better with time?” Kazuha asks.

“Nothing ever gets better with time.”

He leans his head into the crook of Scaramouche’s neck “ You’ll be dancing in the spotlight all in
due time. ”

“I predicted the future.”

“I wish you hadn’t. I regret it, you know.”

Scaramouche blinked. “What?”

“I should’ve stayed in Inazuma.”

“No, are you joking me? You’re one of the literal icons of this generation–”

“And what does it matter?” he asks, “I worked so hard, slaved away to be the best dancer and
singer and actor, fighting for the slightest chance. And for what? What was the point of it all if it
meant I couldn’t have you? ”

He says it so gravely like it’s a truth he’s wanted to admit for years. And– just– how? Scaramouche
was only himself. Overly negative and swears like a sailor and exceptionally good at insulting
those who cares about. How could someone like him be worth more than stardom? Do you know
how many people dream of being famous?

“I’m a fool, Kuni,” Kazuha laughs. “You say I’ve ‘done well for myself .’ Everyone says that. But I
haven’t, I’m not happy and not free and I’ve been lost all four of these past years until you found
me again.”

“I…” he gulps, “I really didn’t do anything that spectacular.”

“You took me on your motorcycle and the rest of the world blurred and I realized I wouldn’t mind
if it was just you and me against everybody else.”

Scaramouche flushed, turning down and hiding behind his bangs. All he did was be who he was.
That was it. No tricks or lies or fake niceness. And Kaedehara loved him anyway. Ei was wrong.
There were people who would love him, even if he showed them his ugliest most monstrous parts.

“I wouldn’t mind either,” Scaramouche says. “The world’s ours anyway.”

He thinks it’s always been theirs.

“Kazuuu!!” A boisterous voice interrupts them from outside the room doors. “Are you in there?!”

“Pretend you’re not home,” Scaramouche whispers.

“Venti has my spare keys,” Kaedehara says back. He goes up to the door and clicks it open.

“Hey!” Venti’s voice.

“You weren’t responding to the group all morning.” Xiao’s.

“We got so worried..” Aether’s. “What were you doing in here all d–” He peers in, just past
Kazuha enough to catch sight of the violet delight in his room. “Oh.”

“It’s you!!” Venti practically pushes his way in.

Scaramouche waves. “The one and only.”

“So that’s why you weren’t responding…” Venti gives Kazuha an implicating look, to which he
frantically flushes.

“Don’t be ridiculous, we did nothing of the sort.”

“I didn’t say anything though,” he fake gasps, “My my, what were you thinking Kazu?”

“I– y-you–”

“Wait, so are you two dating or not?”

“We’re..” Kazuha turns to Scaramouche, and they both give each other exasperated looks. “It’s
complicated.”

“He’s playing with you?”

“We’re playing each other,” Scaramouche corrects.

Kazuha frowns at that. “It’s not like I didn’t try to officially date you.”

“I’m going back to Inazuma in a week.”

“Oh yeah, because I’ll definitely fall out of love with you when you move to a different nation. As
if that ever worked for us.”

Xiao leans against a wall, arms crossed. “Is this really the conversation you want to be having in
front of us?”

“Nono, let them go on Xiao, it’s kinda entertaining.”

Kazuha sighs. “I’m assuming you’re here to ask about my official statement?”

“Oh shit,” Scaramouche breathes, “Is your agency– like– really strict about dating and will you be
ousted because of me?”

“No, Scara.” He doesn’t think Kazuha’s ever called him Scara before. If he ever wants a
nickname, Kuni was always his to claim. But they’re in front of people right now, and
Scaramouche didn’t even say anything, Kazuha just naturally did not use his birth name because he
wasn’t sure if it was okay.

You observant and considerate fucker, Scaramouche thinks, what am I gonna do if I fall even more
in love with you?

.
 ✓ • @kaedeharakazuha

For those of you awaiting an official statement, there is to be no official statement. Continue
theorizing what you think happened. I hope the mystery keeps you up at night.

kit • @burner

WHAT:&):$3$4$4!4!4

Scaramouche⚡️✓ • @scaramouche

“itd be funnier if we just like, fr, didnt tell them”

syl • @phobi

IM SO CONFUSED SO ARE YALL DATING OR NOT???

Scaramouche⚡️✓ • @scaramouche

stay confused :p

4NEMO NEWS • @unofficial4nemoupdates

KAZUHA AND SCARAMOUCHE SPOTTED AT LIYUE HARBOR FESTIVAL — POSSIBLY

ON A DATE?

[ Attached: a paparazzi photo of them. Scaramouche is holding a bouquet and

Kazuha is mid-giggle. ]

notblue • @dazaipfp

why does this feel kinda PR stunty to me

.

Scaramouche⚡️ ✓ quote tweeted.

notblue • @dazaipfp

why does this feel kinda PR stunty to me

Scaramouche⚡️✓ • @scaramouche

agreed

✓ quote tweeted.

notblue • @dazaipfp

why does this feel kinda PR stunty to me

✓ • @kaedeharakazuha

winning 4 awards just wasnt enough publicity yk

simp • @abonkedsimp

I NEED TO KNOW IF KZSCR ⚡️ IS REAL OR NOTTTT

✓ • @kaedeharakazuha

we’re fake my agency is making me do it send help

Scaramouche⚡️✓ • @scaramouche
 how could you say this, my love</3

simp • @abonkedsimp

FOR FUCKS SAKE

Kazuha books them a private room reservation for a really fancy restaurant with expensive cultural
cuisine and insists it's on him. It feels an awful lot like a date when they arrive, all glammed up,
and turning heads everywhere they go.

He barely waits for their order to arrive before Kazuha asks. “We really aren’t dating?”

“No.”

“But you’ll eat formal dinner with me and kiss me and sleep in my bed?”

Scaramouche flushes, looking to the side.

“I don’t get you,” Kazuha pouts. “I’m not forcing you but I just… it’s really confusing, Kuni, when
you treat me so preciously and then act like it’s nothing. Why? ”

Scaramouche stabs his lamb chops with his fork, bringing it to his mouth and chewing deliberately
slow. “I’m going to Inazuma in a week.”

“Plenty of people do long-distance.”

“We’re both insanely busy.”

“Who said we needed to see each other often? It’s not like you’re gonna date anyone else.”
He flushed harder because it was so deeply true. There was no one else. No one so perfect for him
as Kaedehara, and Kaedehara could be his if he simply said yes.

“Why, Kunikuzushi? Tell me.”

“Because you’re scary ,” he breathed, a shaky element to his voice, eyes going wide looking down
at something that wasn’t there. “What if my shit fucks things up like it always does? What if I’m
too much? What if I’m not enough?” The words rush out like a dam’s been broken. “What if I end
up alone like I’m destined to? If I love you and we date right now that means I’ll have to get on a
plane and leave you here and how am I supposed to handle that again– Kazuha- I can't handle that
a-"

“Shhhhh.” Kazuha’s voice is so heavenly merciful. Scara thinks he could be amidst a war and still
be calmed by it. When did Kazuha come to the other side of the table? Put his hands around
Scaramouche’s shoulders and bend down to look him in the eye? “Okay.”

“Okay?” Scaramouche asks. Like a little kid not sure if they’re in trouble. “Is it really okay?”

“Of course it is. Why would it not be?” Kazuha smiles fondly, “Now finish your food.”

It’s a little surreal how good Kazuha is to him. He never asks again. They go to mountaintops and
watch the sun rise and set and all the while Kazuha doesn’t push, never pushes, not even a little.

They go to a beach together and Kazuha buys him an ice-pop that they break in half and Kazuha
gives him the bigger side and he looks gorgeous under sunlight (but Scaramouche is starting to
think he simply looks gorgeous at all times.)

They venture into the sea, hiking their pants up. The wind flows through Kazuha’s ponytail and it
floats while Scaramouche’s bangs poke the frick out of his eyes. For a brief moment, he's
extraordinarily beautiful. Like he could have anyone he wanted in the whole wide world.
When Kazuha laughs it gets lost in the waves. The salty, humid air sticks to Scaramouche’s skin
and he doesn’t even care about the sand getting stuck in his clothing– he’s so happy. Do you know
how long it’s been since Scaramouche last let himself be carelessly happy?

They get into a water fight. It starts when Kazuha accidentally splashes him, and in retaliation,
Scaramouche cups a huge amount of water and launches it at his face. (This is what you sign up

for when you fall in love with an asshole.)

Eventually they’re both hurling water each other’s way until Kazuha gets distracted by a huge,
oncoming wave and Scaramouche darts in his direction, grabs him from the waist and princess-
carries him deeper into the water.

“ Hey! ” he whines, red-faced at the close contact but only half-heartedly pushing at Scaramouche.
“I’m gonna fahall!”

Scaramouche spins him around, wind through their hair, and both of them are full-blown,
boisterously laughing by the end of it.

They visit a playground like they used to as teens. They play on the swingset for a good minute
before concluding, yep, this blows. But they still stay.

Kazuha eventually takes to ordering a pack of lollipops from a nearby vending machine, stuffing
two into his mouth at once– only the strawberry-flavoured ones. He sits, not swinging on the
swing, just rocking back and forth on his knees, like there’s something at the tip of his tongue he
can’t find the words to express.

“Spit it out.”

“What?”

“I can tell when you’re keeping shit from me.”

Kazuha chews on his lip, a guilty face. He sighs, reaches for the pack of lollipops to hand
Scaramouche one while asking, “You said I produce music with anyone.”

“Yea?”

“So you’ve listened to my music.”

Scaramouche stiffens. How bad would it be to admit Kazuha was his top artist on Spotify Wrapped
this year? By a long-shot, too.

“Yea,” he says.

Kazuha looks at him expectantly. “So..? What did you… think?”

Scaramouche tilts his head, frowning, “It was good?”

He rolls his eyes. “Nevermind,” the next part comes out in a mumbled whisper and Scaramouche
can only just about make out the word ‘ dense idiot.’

It’s cloudy today. No sun, and Scaramouche’s former hypothesis was right, Kazuha still looks
gorgeous. It makes him slow his own swinging just enough that Kazuha takes notice and turns to
him.

This is usually when he turns away, but.. why should he? Kazuha already admitted to catching him
staring before, might as well indulge.

Their eyes meet and the speed at which Kazuha goes cherry pink is deliciously satisfying.

“Wh-what are you looking at–” he blinks away, blinks back, blinks away again.

Scaramouche laughs. “You’re cute when you fluster.”

That makes Kazuha flush even harder, turning away to hide his face. “You’re cute when you shut.
up.”

Kazuha was rarely ever so harsh with his words. And the fact he said it with no real bite behind his
tone just made Scaramouche’s heart squeeze tighter. “You think I’m cute?”

“That is not what I– well–” Caught between his own denial and Kazuha’s distaste for lying, he
flushes even harder. “ Scara, ” he whines, “Any more and I think I’ll explode.”

Scaramouche laughs. He’s so cute, cute, cute.

Love was such a difficult thing to define. Humanity built language to put words to
incomprehensible things, but no one had ever shown him which incomprehensible thing
corresponded to love.

He had lived twenty-three years unloved and unknowing, but he thinks he’s figured it out. Love is
whatever the hell comes to life inside him when he looks at Kaedehara.

That feeling that against all logic, or reason, or better judgment, he wants. He yearns for Kaedehara
like he’s never wanted anything else. He stares like it’s all he ever wants to do.

Love, Scaramouche thinks. And he pictures Kaedehara’s silly acts of kindness, the way he sees
beneath the surface, gives people the benefit of the doubt, and pulls the best parts of the worst
people out of themselves.

Then it suddenly makes sense why he’s always loved him.

“What’s wrong?” Scaramouche asks.

They’re staying up late tonight, watching some anime about two separated twins in an alternate
universe. He notices Kazuha squeezing him a little tighter, and with just the blue-light from the
iPad illuminating his face, notices Kazuha is frowning .
“Huh?” In an instant, the calm and friendly mask is back. “It’s nothing, Kuni.”

Scaramouche has had enough of being lied to. “No, it’s not. Tell. Me. ”

Kazuha looks up at him. Scara can feel beneath the blankets how hard the boy’s heart is thumping,
and then Kazuha gulps. “One more day.”

Oh.

“Yea, one more day.”

Until he leaves. And then what? They just.. pretend this all never happened? Let everything that’s
theirs again slowly fade out of existence. Kazuha goes back to the idol life he doesn’t even want
anymore. Scaramouche goes back to the nation he’ll never be happy in. And they both go on with
their lives, never finding other people, dying alone because the one person they’ve always wanted
is an ocean away. What a tragedy.

Kazuha hugs him tighter. He doesn’t ask again for Scaramouche to stay, but he holds him like a
desperate plea.

Scaramouche has already made up his mind.

The public somehow got a hold of the knowledge that Scaramouche’s flight would be at LY
Airport 12pm, so the romantic last send-off he envisioned ends up getting cut short.

“You can’t go in there,” Scaramouche says. They’re in Kazuha’s car parked outside the airport,
and even from here they can see the mass amount of fans and camera crew. “No way.”

Kazuha gives him a puppy-eyed, absolutely heartbroken face.

“Idiot,” Scara pouts, petting the boy’s head. “What difference does it make if you say goodbye at
the boarding area versus right here?”

“A few minutes more with you.”

Scaramouche wants to say it’s only a few minutes, but his heart aches for these few minutes too.

“Will you text?” he asks.

“Will you reply?”

“Yea,” Scaramouche says. “I think– yea. I want to continue being with you.” I want to be with you.

“You don’t have to if you’re scared.”

Scaramouche scoffs out a laugh at that. He’s leaving Kazuha. It’s the moment he’s been dreading
this whole week, but now that it’s here, it’s really not all that bad. Maybe that’s why people
continue to love even with the risk of heartbreak. It’s not all that bad.

“Go out with me, Kaedehara.”

Kazuha blinks, going stiff. “ Right here? ”

“Well, I was planning to ask you in the boarding room with planes around us as I walked across the
terminal but my plans kinda got wrecked.” He side-eyes the huge crowd. “And I think you’d rather
be asked in your car than over text when I get home.”

“I-” he flushes, “I thought you didn’t…”

“Changed my mind.”
He nods. Gulps. “...”

“Quit staring at my lips and give me an answer.”

He looks away, pouting and mumbling, “It’s not like you don’t know already…”

“Then quit starring and do something.”

The air between them is heavy, electrifying. He’s nervous enough Scara might just reach for the
car door and make a break for it. But then Kazuha’s hands are on him and it burns, burns, burns .
He hasn’t been touched in so long, his heartrate quickening, breath going awry–

Then they’re kissing. It isn’t soft. It isn’t aching like before either.

Kazuha kisses him with the fervency of a man whose had to keep his itching hands of Scaramouche
for four years.

Scaramouche will deny to his dying day the ungodly whine he lets out when he feels Kazuha’s
tongue inside him. Bad, he thinks, bad. Heartbreak. Abandonment. Dangerous. Bad. but if it’s bad
why does it feel so good?

“ Hn, ” he hates how desperate he sounds when Kazuha’s hand is in his hair, pushing his head
closer. It’s so uncharacteristically brutal of him. God, he feels dizzy.

He pulls back for breath, covering his mouth with the back of his fist (and also his face because he
can feel himself turning red.) He dares to peek at Kazuha in front of him and the sight is enough to
make him drop to his knees.

Kazuha looks at him with an animalistic sort of hunger and Scaramouche has never felt so wanted.

“I-I’m going to miss my flight,” Scaramouche says.

“If I kissed you well enough, could I convince you to stay in Liyue?”
He smiles. No, he’s not going to stay. But he likes that Kazuha is voicing his honest desires. Cause
even if he’s very appreciative that Kazuha doesn’t push him– ever– he doesn’t like knowing he
makes Kazuha hold his tongue.

“I have to go, you idiot.” He wants to cup Kazuha's face when he says that, cast his bangs behind
his ear and kiss him just to burn the sensation into his memory a final time. But if he does, he fears
he may not have the strength to walk into that airport and not cry.

So instead, he steps out of the car, they wave bye to each other, and with a heavy heart he slams the
door shut. He takes a deep breath in, and out, and tries not to feel like he's leaving everything he's
ever wanted behind.

The walk to the airport is a little dreadful and a little lonely. Before he comes into view of the
crowd, he turns and takes one long look back at the car. And it hurts. Nothing in his life has ever
hurt so much as this. He's been left more times than he can remember. He knows how being tossed
aside feels and now he's inflicting that upon someone else, someone he loves ferociously and
achingly and enough to die for but not enough to stay for.

How would it feel? Scaramouche dares to wonder, If I turned back now, threw myself back into that
car, into his arms, told him I changed my mind and I'll stay and we can live together in his
Wangshuu Inn room. And I can wake up everyday to the sunlight through his windows and his
arms curled around my torso. And he'd make me breakfast and if he had shows, I could support
them. And we could get a pet cat like our fifteen-year-old selves dreamed. I'd never have to go
back to my mother's land. We could kiss everyday with no fear that it's the last time. We could soak
in each other's company without having to ration time. I could know him again, know the way he
likes his coffee made and the keychains on his bag and all the small details I couldn't learn in just
a week.

He wonders and wonders and wonders, standing there, because the moment he walks into that
airport the fantasy officially dies with no chance of ever coming true.

Then someone in the crowd notices him from afar, and he turns. The corpses of his fantasies lay
beneath his feet, and he walks forward, leaving them behind.

It was a hopeless dream anyway. They were always destined to die.

He always destined to end up alone.

The crowd screams his name, parting for him like the red sea to Moses. Camera flashes go off
everywhere. He poses for a few paparazzi, which he’d usually never do but right now it's a good
distraction from how he truly feels.

“ Scaramouche, I love you!!” A loud, high-pitched shrill.

Scaramouche turns to the general area of the sound, brings one hand out of his pockets to cup his
face like a megaphone and yells back, “You have shit taste!”

Everyone laughs. But they do, they really do. Why would anyone love someone like him? Why
would anyone, especially someone like Kaedehara Kazuha?

He walks to the terminal, toward the line where visitors can’t cross. Behind it is an empty scape,
opposed to the absolute horde around him. All the while, he tries to keep on his signature frown.
Buries his sadness with the rest of his feelings.

And then that same high-pitched shrill voice squeals again. “OHMYGOD! IT’S KAZUHA!”

Scaramouche whirls around so fast he almost falls.

No. No way.

The crowd parts once more, and there he is. The stupid fucking idiot, smiling smugly, with a
bouquet of those same signature flowers in his hand.

The crowd goes wild. Scaramouche feels a million flashing cameras and ungodly yelps that sound
more like wild animals and still his eyes remain fixated on Kazuha.

At a loss for any real words, (because he knows if he said anything real it’d be I love you ) he says,
loud enough for the crowd to hear, “You’re such an idiot.”

In the midst of everyone laughing, Kazuha walks up to him and says lowly, “I’m your boyfriend”
while passing him the flowers.

Boyfriend. The word gives him butterflies. It’s getting harder and harder to keep a poker face on, so
Scaramouche ducks behind the bouquet and mutters, “ Idiot boyfriend. ”

And for a moment, the absolute shitstorm in his head quiets. It's okay, he thinks, because Kazuha is
 smiling and the flowers smell good, We'll be okay. There is a reason people love despite the risk of
heartbreak; it's not all that bad.

The heart and bubbles moment is interrupted by a taunt from somewhere in the crowd,
“Scaramouche is bluuuushiiimg??” to which he glares at and screams back,

“AM NOT! GET YOUR EYES CHECKED!” and with utter determination storms past the line,
into his terminal.

The video of this whole affair gets posted to YouTube with the title ‘do homies bring each other
flowers as goodbye gifts’. It breaks 1M streams in a day.

Chapter End Notes

ik i said 3 chapters but….. there may or may not be a continuation chapter in the works
(at this point trust nothing i say)

and here’s the list of references!

Chapter 1: This Love is Ours - Speak Now, Ours. (TS)

"why the hell is he still stuck right where Kazuha left him?" - Folklore, right where
you left me (TS)

"Kunikuzushi didn't want to die. He wished he'd never been born at all." - Bohemian
Rhapsody

"He and Kazuha shouldn't work, but they do." - "Because we work. We shouldn't, but
we do." Enid, Wednesday

That scene where Kazuha shows up at his door in the rain and Scaramouche says "Are
you insane? Get in, idiot!" - "She'll open up the door and say Are you insane!?" 1988,
How You Get The Girl (TS)

"The hand that fit into his" - "Your hands are tough but they are where mine belong"
Speak Now, Ours (TS)

"He thought he had Kazuha figured out too." and "Don't leave me like this." - "Come
on, come on, don't leave me like this! I thought I had you figured out!" Speak Now,
Haunted (TS)
Chapter 2: We're in a Getaway Car - Reputation, Getaway Car (TS)

"He can't make it go away by making Kazuha into a villain" - Folklore, happiness

“He’s the problem, it’s him" - Midnights, Anti-Hero (TS)

"Oh, Kuni. Everything has changed." - Red, Everything Has Changed (TS)

"I miss you too much to be mad anymore." -1989, I Wish You Would (TS)

Chapter 3: please don’t ever become a stranger - Reputation, New Year’s Day (TS)
"So don't you worry your pretty little mind" - Speak Now, Ours (TS)

"Screaming-crying" - 1989, Blank Space (TS)

 Bonus
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Scaramouche ✓ is going live!

“Um-” There was loud shuffling, followed by the sound of something toppling over. “Hello!”

That voice was one that definitely did not belong to Scaramouche. And the usual neon purple
streaming set-up was nowhere to be seen.

Instead, there was sunlight through lace curtains– and what looked like Liyuean trees outside a
window in the background.

did i click on the wrong stream

LMAO WHATS THIS

wait isnt that…

no way

And then Kaedehara Kazuha sat down in front of the camera, adjusting it a little. “I just dropped
my water bottle.”

HOLY SHIT

OMG

/&/)3&2$2&2&

KAZUHA?

wait what

“You’re so bad at this.” Now that was Scaramouche’s voice. A little choppy, like over a phone
call.

oh scaras here too

THIS CANT BE REAL

KAZUHA IM YOUR BIGGEST FAN

“I’m not a streamer,” Kazuha whined.

“Clearly.”

“You–.”

HES SO CUTE

whats going on

SO THEYRE FR DATING?

“Okay okay let me explain–”

Scaramouche cuts him off. “I made a dumb promise at The Teyvat Awards and I’m a man of my
word.”

“Yea, so you can’t see but Scara’s in cat ears right now.”

“But if you think for a second I’m gonna show myself wearing these–” A ringing sound, like the
bells on a cat ear. “On the world wide web, then think again.”

“So it’s a Kazuha stream today. Sorry, Scara fans!”

DONT BE SORRY WE LOVE YOU

kazuha r u gonna be a streamer too?

ID SUBSCRIBE TO UR TWITCH

NO FAIR LET US SEE SCARA

basketcaseflurry used Underline my Message for 15k points

basketcaseflurry: Can we hear you sing?

“Sure, what song?”

Scaramouche & Kaedehara Kazuha Resident Pretty Boy Cover

Streaming_ClipsYT

1.4k subs

9.7M views

r/KazuScara

r/Unpopular Opinions

user172

you guys seriously have to stop with this shipping nonsense. its getting so out of hand. spreading
false info is just damaging ur favourite celebrities image.

when are you chronically online folk gonna realize you dont actually know either of them. yet
youre assuming their sexualities. how stupid can one get to believe this shit??? to kazuscara
shippers, i suggest all of you get a life

ZeddyWeddy

yea bro no bro ofc bro bc homies

just casually get each other flowers
user172

flowers are given as a congratulatory gift amongst friends very often do your research

ZeddyWeddy

“congratulatory gift” THEY HUGGED AT AN AIRPORT WHILE SCARAMOUCHE WAS

ABOUT TO FLY TO INAZUMA. idk abt u dawg that didnt seem very congratulatory that seemed
more like “please dont leave me, i love you”

user172

absolutely delusional

ZeddyWeddy

im right admit it

user172

theyve never confirmed ur claims.

ZeddyWeddy

have u LISTENED to the calm after the storm. do u have EARS.

and do u truly really honestly think if either of them were uncomfortable with the rumours there
wouldnt have been a denial by this point? u think theyd still be streaming together?

user172

pr stunt. maybe company is forcing it

ZeddyWeddy

scaramouche doesnt work under anyone and kazuhas label is GNSHNMPCT Entertains.
GENSHIN. ENTERTAINS. YK.. THE COMPANY THAT IS NOTORIOUS FOR ITS GOOD
TREATMENT OF WORKERS??

.
Trending Topics

Sports | Entertainment | For You

#KazuScara

#ResidentPrettyBoy

#ARETHEYREAL

“Kaedehara? Something wrong?”

Kazuha was laid across his soft sheets, moonlight coming in through his window.

“I was just thinking..” he tossed over to his phone, splayed somewhere random on the bed, “The
reason you quit music was– only cause of me, right?”

“Well yea.”

What a tragedy. One of the greatest musicians his ears had ever been blessed enough to hear,
robbed from the world because of him.

And what a pity, too. Scaramouche loved him so much he gave up his dream because of Kazuha.
And Kazuha only loved him enough to almost do the same.

It’s in the past. If it were anyone else, Kazuha would’ve told them it was pointless to dwell on
something they can no longer change. He wants to tell himself that.

But he can’t. He dwells first thing in the morning as he wakes up. He dwells just before he drifts
into slumber. He dwells while cooking and dancing and in the shower. And he thinks he’s never
going to stop dwelling over that one stupid choice he made, thinks this is all he’ll be reduced to for
the rest of his life: a dwelling thing.
“If I didn’t go on that plane then…” he says, slow, hesitant, “Where would we be?”

“Er- I guess I’d be a musician first of all. We’d still be together, actually, we’d probably be
married,” Scaramouche pauses, “What are you thinking?”

It’s quiet. Kazuha wants to break something.

“I shouldn’t have got on that plane," he says.

It aches deep inside of him. It sits there. The thought that if just one thing had been different,
everything would be different.

Scaramouche would have fulfilled his childhood dream. Kazuha would not be working in an
industry he can’t escape. They’d have matching rings and a home and a cat.

I shouldn’t have got on that plane, he thinks, and he wants to cry. Because he was only nineteen.
And even at nineteen he already knew he wanted to stay, but was so terrified he was making the
wrong choice that he didn’t. And look at him now! He made the wrong choice anyway!

If he were more like Scaramouche, who carried himself with this self-assured pride everywhere he
walked and with everyone he spoke to– would it not hurt so much right now?

“Yea," Scaramouche says.

“I’m sorry. I’ll say it as many times as I have to.”

“Okay.”

“I’ll bring you as many bouquets as I have to.”

“Okay.”
“I’ll kiss you as many times as I have to.”

“O-okay geez I get it!” Scaramouche groans, and Kazuha can hallucinate the redness probably on
his face right now. He can hallucinate that he’s here, truly here with him right now, not a world
away like he always is.

“Hey, about me never making music again.”

“Hm?”

“Does Genshin restrict your production of stuff or can you like, rock up and request to record a
song?”

“I can, why?” Kazuha asked.

A beat.

He blinked once. Twice. His mouth fell open. He understood.

And it was late in the night. He had an early morning shoot. He’s been streaming and calling with
Scaramouche all day. He should be exhausted.

But in that moment, nothing else mattered. Because the thing they had called theirs with their souls
and time and everything put into it, the thing that had rotted and spoiled away and died four years
ago, was coming back to life.

Like a trampled seedling in the dirt and mud, and it had finally stopped raining, and there was
sunlight, and it was growing again.

The Calm After the Storm was alive again.

✓ • @kaedeharakazuha
clout chaser

[ : A cropped iMessage screenshot.

kaedehara you should appear in my streams more

aww you miss me that much??

it gets views

4NEMO

hey guys

Venti: kazuuuuuu!!

Xiao: Haven’t heard from you in a while.

Venti: hows life in paradise?

how would you feel if i wrote music with scaramouche?

The chat goes silent for a moment.

is that

not ok?

Venti: o

Venti: OH
Venti: OH CRAP THIS IS BIG @Aether

Aether: what

Aether: WAIT WHAT

Aether: THE CALM AFTER THE STORM ARE COMING BACK NO WAY THATS MY FAV
BAND

Aether: no offense 4nemo

so its ok?

Venti: OF FUCKING COURSE ITS OK??

Venti: i mean

Venti: as the group manager ill bring it up 2 lumi but im sure she’ll say its ok

Venti: OMG KAZUHAAAA IM SO HAPPY FOR YUUUUU

Xiao: *You

Venti: babe shush

Aether: hate being the only single mf in this house

Aether: archons whens it gonna be my turn

Xiao: ur minor coded

They come up with a theme, concept art, the type of genre and instrumental they want. They’re not
teenagers anymore. Kazuha represents an agency now, he’s held to a certain expectation of quality.

It should be tiring, but with Scaramouche it’s not. It’s thrilling. It’s fun. For the first time in a long
time, Kazuha is enjoying his job.

It’s like their little secret.

Kazuha has never felt more nineteen.

( “I love you,” he says. Scaramouche is asleep on the other line, and not for the first time Kazuha
wonders how he ever willingly left this person.

“You should say that shit when I’m awake.”

Kazuha gasps so hard, like a mouse caught in a trap. Scaramouche is laughing– that asshole–
saying something between cackles like ‘You’re so cute’ and Kazuha is so mortified he straight up
hangs up. )

Everything is going fine.

Everything is perfect actually.

An interviewer asks him if he has a type and the back of his mind draws up violet, sharp-edged
bangs. Violet, red-lined eyes. He has to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling stupidly,
he’s so in love.

A white cat growls at his doorstep. Kazuha takes him in and names him Shiro. The ferocity
reminds him of a certain someone.

Everything starts to remind him of Scaramouche actually.

A black, leather jacket sits on a store mannequin.

There’s a bitter tea option at the boba shop.

While crossing the street, he catches sight of a little girl begging her mom for a dango stick.

And it’s like every cringey love song, all the K-dramas, the fanfics and books– suddenly make
sense.

Everything was going fine.

Scaramouche doesn’t call the night they planned.

Kazuha jogs it up to a horrible sleep schedule brought on by insomnia and lets it go.

Kazuha texts.

He never gets a reply.

Scaramouche misses his scheduled streaming day.

Then he misses his next one.

.
Kazuha calls Childe. Childe promises to check up on him.

Later on in the night he gets two notifications.

Childe

he’s locked himself in

Kuni♡

my mom visited

He calls Scaramouche the moment he receives the message.

The phone riiiiiiiings.

Kazuha chews on a nail.

It rings twice.

He tries to regulate his breathing.

It rings thrice.

This is all so stupid. The person he loves is in pain and he’s not there to hold him. How many times
is this? That Kazuha has failed to be where Scaramouche needs him most?
The fourth ring gets cut off mid way.

: Kuni♡ declined your call.

Kuni♡

sorry

i sound like shit rn

You

dont be sorry

im booking a flight to inazuma asap

Kuni♡

please dont

kaedehara?

istg

ill refuse to see you if you come

so dont

You

okay

i had foolishly hoped things got better over time:/

Kuni♡

nothing gets better over time

Kuni had left abruptly. Twelve hours later, in the morning, he texts again.
Kuni♡

are you awake?

You

yea why?

Kuni♡

at home?

You

yea?

There’s a knock on his door.

It’s just a coincidence, he tells himself. Yet Scaramouche isn’t replying to his message. He doesn’t
have a delivery or mail to look forward to right now. He’s rushing to put on his slippers, button up
his shirt, the door open with a creak–

“Kuni,” he breathes.

“Kaede– oomph.” Kazuha pounces on him. He fists at Scara’s clothing, presses his head into his
chest, somehow nothing is close enough.

Slowly, Scaramouche wraps his arms around Kazuha’s head. “People can see us,” Scaramouche
reminds him, mouth too close to his ear.

When Kazuha looks up, the sight breaks his heart. He brings a hand up to caress at the bags under
Scaramouche’s eyes, and the puffy redness.

“I look like shit, I know,” Scaramouche laughs, but the sound is weak. His hand curls around
Kazuha’s wrist, and Kazuha takes the moment to bring his other hand up to Scaramouche’s face as
well, pulling him down to kiss him.

Scaramouche makes a cut off noise as he does it. It’s fast. It’s fervent. Kazuha takes one last glance
to make sure no one caught that and then pulls Scaramouche in.

“Woah woah,” Scaramouche grabs at both his wrists to get him to pause, laughing a little, “Can I at
least apologize for the sudden drop-in first?”

As if we don’t both know I’d let you come over at any moment in a heartbeat.

“I was so worried,” Kazuha says instead.

“Let me apologize for worrying you too, then.”

“I don’t forgive you. Make it up to me.”

“And how do I do that?”

Kazuha squints at him for a long while. “Kunikuzushi,” he inhales, like he’s about to go off on a
long spiel. Then his eyes trail down to Scara’s lips. “I pride myself in the virtue of patience. But
right now you’re testing it.”

Scaramouche laughs, teeth tucking his bottom lip, and finally stops 'testing'.

From the time they were nineteen and now, it seems Scaramouche’s process of dealing with
hardship hasn’t changed.

Step 1: Let it happen. (If it were anyone else– Scaramouche would lash back out at them. But when
it’s Ei, he always just.. takes it. Quietly and obediently, like the good son he was trained to be.)
Step 2: Go into a rage. Break all the shit in his room. Stand on a high ledge. Scream and break
plates.

Step 3: Self-isolate.

Step 4: Emerge as if everything is fine and not talk about it for years.

“What happened?”

They ate breakfast and Kazuha made him bitter tea and now they had to talk about it.

“Nothing,” he says. Kazuha gives him a face. “Really nothing. She didn’t do anything. She didn’t
say anything. I just– I shouldn’t be this scared of her anymore but–”

“But you are.”

There are things socially expected of you. After a certain amount of time, you 'should' get over
something. Get over the mother who never did her job. Get over the boy who you chose your
career over. But forgiveness has never been an essential part of grief.

Time heals nothing. You don’t have to pretend the wounds have closed just because the years have
passed.

“I hate Inazuma,” Scaramouche says, like a confession. “I know you love it, but I can’t stand it
there. It’s Raiden Ei’s nation, was once Raiden Makoto’s nation, and was once going to be Raiden
Kunikuzushi’s nation.” His breath hitches, eyes teary and voice cracking, “Everywhere I go it’s
Raiden this, Raiden that– she’s everywhere and I can’t breathe. I can’t escape my own last name.”

He falls apart in Kazuha’s arms. It hurts. It hurts like hell. Hasn’t he suffered enough? Wasn’t the
truckload of parental neglect and the four year one-sided pining enough torture from the universe?
Why did the stratosphere hate him? What did I ever do to you!?

“I don’t want my last name anymore.”

Kazuha looks at him. Kazuha holds him like he’s the only solid thing in the world.

“Then take mine,” he says.

It only takes a second. Through teary eyes, Scaramouche freezes, head snapping into his direction.
“Wha-” A gorgeous flush takes over his face, and it’s red, so red, redder than he’s ever gotten.
“Did you just propose to me!?”

“No– well– I guess kinda but–” Kazuha was waving his hands frantically, “I was trying to solve
your issue!”

But it was too late. He was already imagining their names slotted together. Kaedehara
Kunikuzushi.

( Raiden Kazuha, an afterthought. The sheer notion of it brought along huge rammifications,
endless social and political power, mountains of wealth– but Kazuha would never take it. No
matter how much he loved his nation, if Scara did not rule it neither would he. )

“W-well..” Scaramouche ducked, hiding behind his long bangs (a cute habit. Kazuha wanted to
tuck those bangs behind his ear and kiss him) mumbling, “..It’s not like I’d reject…”

Okay. Fuck it. Kazuha was kissing him again.

Scaramouche ⚡️ ✓ • @scaramouche

sry for the impromptu streaming break - im in liyue again

 rzclr • @aktgw

FFS WE WERE WORRIED FOR NOTHING

villain arc • @currentlyhavingmy

“is scaramouche okay?? ” HE WAS ON A

HONEYMOON

“We’re supposed to be working,” Kazuha reminds him for the fifth time.

“I know.”

“Then stop flirting with me.”

“Resident Pretty Boy is almost entirely me flirting with you.”

Kazuha flushes. His boyfriend is insufferable and he unfortunately loves him.

The concept of their album was easy to decide on: time. What four years of yearning does to a man.
How some wounds never heal over. Getting older and its affects on love. The longevity of fame.
Unsureness in the lasting of a relationship. Time zones.

There’s only one song on the whole album that doesn’t fit this theme and it’s Track 6: Resident
Pretty Boy (Re-record). Track 6 to match it’s track number on the original album and… well, it
doesn’t match because it’s Resident Pretty Boy. But tiktok will love it.

“I want to write another track about Ei.”

Kazuha turned to him. “Okay,” he said. And he didn’t ask any questions about the song until
Scaramouche brought it up first.

Kazuha did not usually spill his feelings. When he did, that meant he was just– gone.

4nemo

i like him so much

Aether: DIDNT ASK

Aether: L + RATIO

Xiao: Ew gross

i want to marry this man

i want his hand permanently chained to mine

I WANT HIM SO BAD ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY

Venti: gross but cute

this is so pathetic im GONE FOR HIM

he could look me in the eye and confess to murder and id be like “w-wow ”

Aether: WTF

there is nothing he could do to get rid of me

if he told me to get on all fours and bark i would do it

 if he wanted a housewife im sorry yall would need to find a new 4th member

Venti: Kazuha…

Xiao: What has he done to you

Xiao: You were the only sane one left

my sincerest condolences xiao but it had to be said..

GOOD LORD

DEAR ARCHONS

except the shogunate fuck her

BUT HES SO HOT IM GONNA KILL MYS-

4NEMO ✓ • @4nemoofficial

[ A teaser image.

Kazuha and Scaramouche are on a stage, rocking it out on guitars. Venti and Xiao can be seen
feeding each other in the background while Aether sits on his own, on the other side, cheering.

Huge text at the bottom reads: The Calm After The Storm Tour, and then in smaller text, featuring
4NEMO.

Another image.

This one is of Kazuha and Scaramouche sitting back-to-back against each other. Scaramouche
looks like he’s protesting at the closeness, while Kazuha leans further into him.

Text on the side reads: Set List,

Album 1.

1. Hey!
2. The Calm
3. The Storm
4. Dreamer
5. Mother
6. Resident Pretty Boy
7. Ours

Album 2.

1. Searching For You

2. All Of It For Something
3. Tick-tock
4. Morning & Night
5. Progenitress
6. Resident Pretty Boy (Re-record)
7. Fallen Leaves
8. just homie tingz
9. Matter of Time
10. Nothing Gets Better with Time
11. If You’re Here It’s Okay

myileo • @farulay

album 2? ALBUM 2??? HOLY FUCK ALBUM 2/)/)!/?/!/?/

imjustyour • @everydaysimp

“just homie tingz” THE KAZUSCARA ANTIS ARE GOING TO FIGHT FOR THEIR LIVES
THANK U FOR GRANTING US THIS

Scaramouche ⚡️ ✓ • @scaramouche

what. you didn’t think i flew out to liyue for shits and giggles did you? #kzscrtour
 Childe ✓ • @tartaglia

be so fr you flew out to mostly to see kazuha

flour • @floursieve

HE USED THE SHIP NAME KAZUSCARA IS REAL

✓ • @kaedeharakazuha

Suprise :)

Tickets go on sale on Scaramouche Twitch Stream Monday

Venti! ✓• @ventithebard

i support kazuscara, just not in my band yk:/

Aether ✓ • @traveller2

i support kazuscara, just dont shove it down peoples throats:/

✓ • @kaedeharakazuha

…youre literally going on tour with us??

Lumine ✓ • @traveller1

i respect kazuscara, but i dont support:/

✓ • @kaedeharakazuha

….YOU LITERALLY MADE THIS TOUR HAPPEN????

.

Trending Topics

#kzscrtour

#KazuScara

#ARETHEYREAL

#4nemo

The Death and Rebirth of The Calm After The Storm … Click for more.

4NEMO Official Twitter Confirms ‘Album 2’... Click for more.

Is KazuScara Real?: The Proof So Far… Click for more.

All You Need To Know About KazuScara… Click for more.

Kazuha’s scrolling through a mass amount of emails on his laptop on their cafè date.

“A lot of big names are reaching out for our thoughts. Insider, Rolling Stone, The Mondstadt
Times..”

“Who do you wanna give the scoop to?”

Kazuha averts his eyes. He drums his fingers against the table. “She’s not exactly famous. It might
get us less views.”

“And when have I ever cared for that?” Scaramouche passes him his drink. Kazuha squints at it,
but his boyfriend insists.

It’s bitter. Kazuha makes a sour face. Scaramouche chokes on a laugh and says he’s cute.

“Stop flirting with me. Tomorrow’s the day.”

“Yea,” Scaramouche sighs, “Tomorrow’s the day.”

O’ Clock

The Calm After the Storm

▶️ • ♡

1. Searching For You

2. All Of It For Something
3. Tick-tock
4. Morning & Night
5. Progenitress
6. Resident Pretty Boy (Re-record)
7. Fallen Leaves
8. just homie tingz
9. Matter of Time
10. Nothing Gets Better with Time
11. If You’re Here It’s Okay

20.0M streams

9 hours ago

.
It’s on every Spotify playlist.

Every article on your home page.

Every video you scroll on Tiktok.

Every influencer’s posting about it.

Your mom knows, your grandma knows.

“Everyone’s waiting on our statement,” Scaramouche says.

Kazuha smiles. “Kokomi’s posting it.”

Kokomi-Writes

O’ Clock: An Answer To Everything

I feel like I have to ask this before anything else– are you two a couple?

S: …

K: Scara, don’t you dare–

S: Nah, just homie tingz.

K: Oh My God. Ignore him, yes, we are. We were also dating from ages fifteen to nineteen– then
we broke up for four years and got back together last year.

S: We made it pretty obvious.

I’m glad there’s finally confirmation. So you two knew each other at fifteen?

K: We met at fourteen. We were classmates.

S: I’d like to confirm Kaedehara has been popular since the womb.

K: He’s exaggerating.
S: (lip-mouthing) I’m not.

Ahaha. So was Scaramouche also popular? Is that how you two got together?

S: Total opposite actually. A teacher was so concerned about my anti-socialness she had to fuckin’
coax Kazuha into befriending me. That’s how we became friends!

( Kokomi’s jaw falls in offended shock. )

S: I know right! Then I found out and I was obviously pissed, right!?

( She nods vigorously. )

K: So to make up for it I went to his doorstep in the rain with flowers and basically begged him not
to hate me.

…What kind of shoujo manga do you two live in?

S: Exactly!!

Well then. What’s the story behind The Calm After the Storm?

K: It’s a band we formed when me and Scara were fifteen. It split after I moved to Liyue to pursue
idoling.

S: After meeting again at The Teyvat Awards, we decided to start writing together again.

About The Teyvat Awards…; what the heck happened there?

K: That…

S: I kidnapped my ex and we took an impromptu motorcycle ride.

What?

K: I don’t know why I agreed to it.

S: And then we got soaked in the rain and on our way back in, I heard my name being announced
and I was like shit wtf but the elevator wasn’t fast enough so we rushed up the stairs.

And that’s how we got the viral photo?

K: (embarrassed) Yea.

You two are really something. Next question: are you aware of the viral video ‘do homies
bring each other flowers as goodbye gifts’?

K: (physically cringes) Oh God.

S: No, they don’t. Boyfriends do. We had to write a whole song about this.

Speaking of that, is that your favourite song on the new album?

K: Mine’s Searching For You . The first verse is sung entirely by Scaramouche, and the second is
by me– and the whole song feels like a huge build-up of undefined aching. Yearning for something
for four years but not knowing what’s missing. And the bridge is just–

That perfectly encapsulated feelings of: Oh. All along I was searching for you .

K: Mhm mhm! And it’s pretty obvious it’s sung from personal experience.

S: Nothing Gets Better With Time for me. Because I’m done with people saying Oh it’s in the past,
who the hell cares? Doesn’t matter how long ago it was, it’s still allowed to hurt.

That’s a very nice message. Were there any songs particularly hard to write?
K & S: (in unison) Progenitress.

Ah. Yea. Care to explain?

S: Progenitress means, like, birthgiver. Something you descended from. It’s track 5, because track
5 on our first album was called Mother .

I feel like– ‘mother’ has some connotations of a woman who took care of me, raised me, but she
really didn’t. So she has no right to take that title. She’s just a progenitress.

Do you have anything to say to fans who may be going through similar experiences?

S: …

S: I think I wrote the first album while the pain was still ongoing. I was still living in her house. I
sang Mother with raw emotion.

S: And this album is like, writing from hindsight.

S: If The Calm After the Storm is a bleeding wound, O’ Clock is the healed-over scar it left behind.

S: But I don’t think there’s anything worth saying to my old self. It doesn’t get better with time. It
doesn’t make you stronger. It just hurts a shit ton and happens to you and you never get a reason
why.

I’m sorry.

S: Funny thing, she actually visited me recently after I called her out in my Teyvat Award speech.

On a lighter note, are you excited for tour?

K: I’ve never been happier to do my job.

S: I would’ve refused to tour with anyone else.

(Kokomi smiles) You two suit each other perfectly.

S: I mean we better. We’re getting married so.

Huh?

K: Aha, you’re such a jokester Scara.. hahah..

Are those matching rings?

K: Wh-whaaat? No way, what a coincidence! (Kazuha looks at his hand. There’s a ring with an
indent of a lightning bolt on it.)

S: This is– this is bro behaviour. Homie tingz. (He holds up his hand. The ring has an indent in the
shape of a maple leaf.)

Wait, seriously!?

That’s the story of how two mentally unstable gay dudes break the internet.

As soon as the article is published, Scaramouche and Kazuha have to mute both their phones to
stop the constant pinging.

DCKZ ✓ • dckzofficialband

Go listen to O’ Clock. www.spotify.com/oclock

.
Ayaka ✓ • @ladykamisato

#oclock I fell in love with this album on first listen

Ayato ✓ • @lordkamisato

#oclock easily album of the year

✓ • @kaedeharakazuha

that is.. such high praise coming from you im unbelievably honoured ////

TTA ✓ • @TheTeyvatAwards

It’s us!! #oclock #albumoftheyear?

[ : Spotify lyrics, Searching For You

The Teyvat Awards, fancy room,

Gold champagne, dancing tunes

Crimson eyes across the room

And suddenly I realized

All along

I was searching for

You ]

.
Worldwide Top 10 • live currently

1. Resident Pretty Boy (Re-record)

2. Searching For You
3. just homie tingz
4. If You’re Here It’s Okay
5. Progenitress
6. Morning & Night
7. Nothing Gets Better With Time
8. Matter of Time
9. Tick-tock
10. All Of It For Nothing

fedya • @deeznuts

kokomiwrites/oclock WAR IS OVER. #THEYAREREAL . NOT ONLY IS KAZUSCARA

CANON THEYRE ENGAGED

imjustyour • @everydaysimp

the subreddits gonna go crazy

Trending Worldwide

#oclock

#TheCalmAfterTheStorm

#THEYAREREAL

#KazuScara

issy • @alhaissy
THEY ARE TRUE LOVE.

[ Spotify Lyrics, Searching For You

An undefined longing

I didn’t know then

Looking forward to something

At some point, but when?

What was I missing?

Someone, but who?

All along, I realized;

I was searching for you. ]

r/oclock

axxis • 5 mins ago

holy fuckjng sjit sholy fucking AHITTR ok ill try to keep it short bc i need to get into the analysis
but THE WHOLE ALBUM HAD MY JAW ON THE GROUND. AND THEN KOKOMIS
ARTICLE AFTERWARDS THAT BASICALLY CONFIRMS EVERYTHING WEVE WANTED
UP TILL NOW I COULD NOT BREATHE.

anyway

O’ Clock is a time-themed written that tells you the life stories of Kaedehara Kazuha and
Scaramouche.

Track 1, Searching For You

kazuha and scara alternate singing. the whole song is abt something being missing but not knowing
what and then the bridge hits and they see each other across the room and then theres motorbikes,
rain, festivals, awards and ‘Oh. All this time, I was looking for you.’

Track 2, All Of It For Something

sung by kazuha. abt working tirelessly and sacrificing everything for a goal, only to achieve it and
realize… what was the point? Was all of it for nothing? No! There has to be something, right!?

Track 3, Tick-tock

sung by kazuha. very clearly abt how the idol industry relies on youth and hes scared of losing his
influence as he ages (quote lyric “Will you still want me when I’m not brand, shiny new?”)

the title is also purposefully made to sound like the social media app TikTok which i find so clever

Track 4, Morning & Night

lo-fi duet. SO CUTE. theres a bunch of gaming sfx and references and im pretty sure its titled
Morning & Night to reference Liyue and Inazuma timezones (bc when its night in liyue, its
morning in inazuma and vice versa)

also i think its a sun and moon reference?? bc kazuscara is THE sunmoon couple.

Track 5, Progenitress

hooooooly shit. when i tell you i was SPEECHLESS at first listen. Mother on their first album has
always been my fav but THIS TAKES THE CAKE

i fucking– no words. some of the lyrics you could just TELL scara was writing from personal
experience.

its the fact that we LISTENED to his teenage enraged self scream Mother, and now Progenitress is
like getting to see the aftermath. after hes accepted it all happened and its no longer raw pain, its
just pain thats been sitting there far too long.

Track 6, Resident Pretty Boy (Re-record)

good to see that after 8 years scaramouche is still a fuckboy flirt

Track 7, Fallen Leaves

another kazuha song woo!! its a good song but i kinda see why its the least popular on the album bc
the metaphors are SO high IQ i literally had such a hard time deciphering them

i think its abt looking back at the past and everything you left behind that you once loved, the same
way you look at a pile of rotting, fallen leaves that were once honey-coloured

Track 8, just homie tingz

that track title… IS DECEITFUL. SHOULD BE ILLEGAL. I LITERALLY OPENED IT

THINKING oh what a funny title this is another crack song AND THEN ITS ABT QUEER
ERASURE AND THE INABILITY TO DISTINGUISH PLATONIC AND ROMANTIC
ATTRACTION WTF??????

i was so very personally attacked by this and i was not prepared at all. KAZUSCARA IF UR
SEEING THIS FUCK U

Track 9, Matter of Time

sung by scaramouche. id like to describe this as ‘Anxiety: The Song’

its abt the belief that its only a matter of time before your secrets get exposed. your past catches up
to you. your pet dies. the person you love most leaves you. every good things comes to its end, so
why even try anymore?

the line “I know myself best, and I hate myself. So when you get to know me, you’ll hate me– it’s
only a matter of time.” ATE

Track 10, Nothing Gets Better With Time

scaramouche complains for 3 minutes about people telling him he should get over stuff because a
certain amount of time has passed

If You’re Here It’s Okay

BANGER END TRACK. its a duet and its just… so soft… so precious… *cups in hands*. i think
its partially a reply to ‘Matter of time’ for scaramouche. its the decision that the risk of heartbreak
is worth loving again, because if kazuhas there its okay.

for kazuha its the willingness to stop trying so hard (like how hard he tried in All Of It For
Something) and to stop being perfect (like in Resident Pretty Boy) because if scaras there its okay.

in conclusion

they are the definition of love

dumb fuck ginger

HOLY SHIT SCARA

YOU NEVER TOLD ME YOU COULD DO THIS

THIS MIGHT BE MY FAVOURITE ALBUM EVER

chalk nerd

Congratulations from Kaeya and I.

aunt that looks like 5yr-old

So proud of you!!!! Just listened and loved every song.

drunk bard

whats it like being the star of today? (take good care of kazu)

Her (pink)

Must you insist on defaming your mother every chance you get?
Her

Honestly, what is wrong with you?

Saying I didn’t raise you when I put a roof over your head and clothed you.

If it weren’t for me, you would be nothing.

That Kaedehara boy has always been a bad influence on you, Kunikuzushi.

Come back to Inazuma at once.

“Kuni? Is something wrong?”

Scaramouche stares blankly at his screen.

It’s two notifications. Two, amongst a sea of millions of praising fans. Two, so why does it eat him
up inside?

“I don’t want to go back,” he says, staring at that message. “I never want to go back there– she’s
gonna– I can never escape her–” He fists at his hair, chest falling and rising rapidly. “How will I
face her? What will she do? What if she tells the public– ”

“Shhhh.” Kazuha’s hands are on his shoulders. “I’m right here.”

He’s here. If you’re here, it’s okay.

“But you won’t be there . I’ll be on my own, I can’t do this on my own–”

“Then don’t.”

Their hands clasp together, fingers interlocking. A maple ring and a lightning one.
“You never have to do anything alone again. I protect you and you protect me till death do us
part.”

Scaramouche squints, not understanding.

“Stay in Liyue.”

He splutters, “I can’t just–”

“Why not? You hate it there. You love being with me. Both of us have money to spare.”

His mind races a million miles per minute, scrambling for a reason but.. huh? There isn’t one.

It was four years ago that moving overseas felt like such an impossible task. Scaramouche was not
that person anymore. He was no longer stuck where Kazuha left him.

Stay in Liyue, the idea echoes in his head, dangerously delicious.

“Can I really?” Is it really this easy? Do I really deserve this? Will the universe not get in the way
this time?

Can I finally have you?

Kazuha smiles. He looks at Scaramouche so fondly, like it’s all he ever wants to do.

“Kaedehara..”

“You can’t call me that anymore,” he laughs. “You’ll be a Kaedehara soon, too.”

“Oh, shut up.”

 “Hm. Make me.”

He kisses him and he’s here. Kazuha’s right in front of him, to hold and to have. The album he
made is top-charting in every nation. Liyue is his new home. Their pet cat sleeps in a corner. After
so much fighting and crying and hopeless nights and longing, longing, longing– every faraway
dream he’s ever had is welded into reality.

The calm has finally arrived after the storm.

Chapter End Notes

aaaaand its finally done. LADIES AND GENTLEMAN AND OTHER

DISTINGUISHED GUESTS WE ARE FINISHED. 23K WORDS HOLY WOW.

this was such a joy to write omg and also I FINISHED A SERIES FOR ONCE. CAN
YOU BELIEVE IT? TRULY A MIRACLE.

no but seriously How To Bag An Idol is my favourite thing ive ever written (and
maybe second place goes to pov: ur crush has a bf what could go wrong ) the fact it
was so well-received numbers wise makes me want to continue writing a ton of series

i got a comment that said i made them want to quit writing and that is the HUGEST
compliment i have ever received bc I KNOW THAT FEELING SO WELL. I HAVE
SAID THAT ABT MULTIPLE WRITERS. and ik its just the internet and everyones
nice on ao3 but the fact smn thought it abt ME?????

anyway. thank u for reading. thank u to those who shared with ur friends or on tiktok.
thank u thank u thank u.

Please drop by the archive and comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!