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bee BOHR eVeeBUbwwWbewWw eee iw Jerry Springer ~ The Opera by Richard Thomas with some bits by Stewart Lee Vocal Score May 2004 #10 a a2 #3, m4 HS, 416 Ga #17 #18 419) #20 a #22 Jerry Springer - The Opera Overtly-ture Audience vety plainsong Ladies and Gentlemen ave yourselves a Good Time Bigger Than Opera Winfrey Foursome Guest ‘talk to the Hand Adverts 1 Intro into Disper Man Diaper Man Monte! cums Dirty This is my Jerry Springer moment. Mama gimme smack on the asshole want to sing something beautiful Adverts 2. ‘The first time I sae Jerry Backstage Se Poledancer just wanna dance thas no name . Some are descended from angels Jerryeamn tan EntrancerEnd of Act One Musical Numbers Act One Audience & Guests ‘Audience & Guests WUM& Audience WUM & Audience WUM 8 Audience Divi, Peaches, Zandra, Valkyrie, Tremont & Audience WUM, Tremont, Peaches, Zandra, Dwight & Audience Audience Audience & W.U.M Montel, Andrea, Audience & Valkyrie Montel Baby Jane & Audience Baby Jane, Andrea, Montel, W.UM & Audience Andrea Audience wom WM, Valkyrie & Audience Shawntel, Chucky & Audience Shawntel & Audience Trene & Shawntel Irene, Shanwtel, Chucky & Audience Guests, W.UM & Bouncers WAM, Klan & Guests Dakota Muse Sree #23, W234 #34 34a 435 436 Jerry Springer - The Opera Musical Numbers Act Two Gloomy Nurses Nurses Pargutory Dawning Orchestral Ea Excrete Dead Guesis* & Nurses ‘The Haunting seccresssecsees Shawntel, Chucky, Andrea, Tremont, Dwight, Irene, Baby Jane & Nurses Him am the Devil... Satan, Dead Guests & Nurses Bvery last motherfucker should go down Satan, Dead Guests & Nurses Grilled and roasted Satan, Dead Guests & Nurses ‘Transition Music Baby Jane, Dead Guests & Nurses ‘Once in Happy Realms of Light Satan, Jesus & Hells Audience Fuck you talk Satan and Jesus spat Adam and Bve and Mary... Where were you? . Behold God ain't easy being me (Part 1) Satan & Jesus & Hells Audience Satan & Jesus & Hells Audience Adam, Eve, Jesus, Satan, Mary & Hells Audience Mary; Sauan, Eve, Adam, Jesus & Hells Audience Tremont, Andrea, God, Anges, Hells Audience & Hlells Guests God, Hells Audience, Guests & Angels, Satan Tain’t easy being mie (Part 2) Company Marriage of Heaven and Hell Company ‘The big cheesey Jerry Springer Moment Angels, Hells Audience & Guests #37 Jernyitis finished Baby Jane #372 Jerry Eleison Baby Jane #38 Please don't die... 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Dia = per Poo ping ‘Thats © south per Poop-ing Dis pe Poon, wo ob & Pe Poop ag Diaper Poop ng : i woeo w wow wo y wo odie ), 5 ery Sige Te pera 2005 wvowoUoUwH wv» vw wags Soy Sige Te Opera 04 mm Ff em om > Om mm & &P MP KP EB PR KT TP Fh fT CD Tm MM M 14- I want to sing something beautiful (C) Richard Thomas Adee d-114 T want «sag some = thing—————— _—_——— —— em == fa 1 want sg some = thing: - ,— pos =i = ve — (Casey time Ree wo 8 > ow Ww wow sey Sauges Th: Opera 203 Revised 514 es > 10g someting ei page 2 3 Reals ery Slap Ta Opa 20 \ evn cg ut page = n " 8 at aa a < i TOR OM MPO AAAAMMARA AANA Revised 5104 14- I want to sing something beautiful Richard Thomas (Bh Version) 5 ua [amarest Peo cicero PEPE EEE EEE eco a o aotren 1 want to sing some = thiang———— SE = cor (REET RES SE EEE a ee Pay me ewe MAnenranmnmmrnnne fr Pf RP mr Pf -# PP Ser Sine Ta Oe Ee Revised WO (*) Revised Ot \ z s a a ee ———— a is z Ef 3 < i = i i i oom am th hh Mm Mh MM AAAMAOAH HAH HHH a Tt ig orang bevel page 3 PF MM KF MH MH KM KH HM & fermen mh P mom w | 15-Adverts 2 Richard Thomas Novocaine] ¢=49 12 “ 5 ow Ge wiw w Pano wewuew ey Dove boy sea i gan | ee fn oy Sig Te Opt 03 1S abens 2 yage2 0h look at ay — gun ook at my big gun coh look at my gon look at my big gun you could have a gun too ves | You could have 2 gun too But you gotta buy first Wh, Joes lA, Bounce back with sy pag Te Opera T2008 Revied sO PP Pm && PB Ph MP HM MP MM PT KT Mm MM PM TH Th Mm A A MH & ™ Aah wow = terenacinesly | die : pal ww w ww svuuvRoULeBwYD hor = ible |deun ous ey Seige Ts Opes NT 05 16-The first time I saw Jerry Richard Thomas & Stewart Lee Warm up man p= Boone neeeeeERECEpR Eas — ) TH & The frst time 1 sw Jerry on TV 1 knew that there was ope for wum When I saw how he worked the crowd T kee that he cold help me wum ‘But some-times Dh ReHRRRARHRARRROAADA ND mh Tt ery Sie te Opera 205 Revel S01 eve e-em my ge 2 set Springer Opes 2003 AMT RTARRRARARAR AR FT P 16a Backstage Scene Richard Thomas & Stewart Lee ® ; Waren vp man Hey Jerry Wha can Tsay man tgh crowd wun PP Pm Mm MP MM PM PM fm fh g to tou wun Cee You and me bot we —— Jer-ry don't bal sit —— Parr Mm mM ™ 7 Th! ™ Jeny Spas ope NT 095 Revised 5104 peo-ple so ia they get stuck in re-vOW ~ fg Pimps and per - vers teen - age whores » M ~ ©) stows Fak we eet ter ous Inose doors snd onto 8 ane to Chica uv L Valve (Irene) Sus and Fag go sips eattana DS aw ose 3°" 2 kee Revised S104 Bitty ene gage 3 wun You could rua Tate er en Pres - i - dent Piano wom ioe ke pe on one tae Ya bed cage a I gi oe ig gocm eke oe oe I © 4.4 ’ tas 2 wom aa TD aE a vowo ey Spr Be opera NED Revised S/O mn «im ~~ le a Tf Oe FS FP eK KP Om OR Ot > mm @ Hf & aaasnye Sem ges aw wun a Pave ue vu Jy sorry g-go1s IF Yim out of fine Sor-ey i'm. ak-ing up 10 much of your Kane buh ct hile ay wuUuBUY 4 z ister fick-ing big shot sun shines out his ass Take your job and shore i its been such a bast F 5 wuuU = Fuck you Fuck you, Fuck you Fuck i sary Srnge oer 2068 Revised S104 BBUBEUBY ea Badge ow ones e € Yau know, wen war a younger aan I was passionate abou cil igs. education, the anwar momcment. Tas elected ey coun Then ome day went toa prostee Okay ya bet wih aque. Next day waa ove but Cccp apd le became ayer of Cacia. And asthe thie largest City... Ohio. There only two things you need tokaow abou pels: One, pe seve eaves ote tic cara speak up or wat you nom oe hu, om thing shuld always be er > eh Ay - [where are my cars] Whee are ny ear ™ ® i fm fF fm fs $f % KF RK Revised 5/08 ary Speer te pera 208 oe mo Om Oo peewee euewvweewewnvwwwwiw ~ Jer oayJereny er-aydereny [Jersey Go > Jer-ay [foray Go Jerry | Jer a= 24 a sar Seager be opera 003 Revised 5/04 pore é [Gaes So isi ow Final guest 17-Poledancer E Please say hello to Shawntel Richard Thomas P ® ser60 6 £ in Ta Bich Ta oe “ id id rane € 2 Shawntet a Shp Shutyp sition Shoup —shutup stow (Redpawanra a pale ae i b> | > fm Mm Mm Mm PH KR Mm Pf say le 1 boen runaing af-ter other peo ~ ple > & € € € é ay Singer The Opera NT 28 Revised 04 w vers a a _— looking ater them clean - ng ap thee shit Now I van-na Gad my dreams a ~ gain a w a er | stip dae 2 |i 3 a z 5 e 5 oe wee wee ee VREewuBHevuYeHeuewwYeYwu > a ey Singer Te OpersNT 20 Revised S04 Tempo 1 (Jump on ewe) 1 dun-p0 we dont ek Aw : = yttit - tatty fsquel tke a pig ce) fal bl =H ~~ 2 £ as 2g af Sit 2 ds J 3 Piao : @ cmay Put your fucking clothes on you su pid tek sey Spring Te Opes M2003 Rowse 04 € RB Oe fw Hh SP Sf SH OP SF PO HM KF MP MM SE KS eee pe ¢ ) in yor sep cook sober Put your fuck-ing-clothes on you stu-pid bitch ut your fock-ing clothes on you stspid bitch [Sores take w youre nappy wit Shavates pote dancing deans You look t-die-u-lous You Took n= dic-u-lous a i © {pI He dont know alit he never saw me dance a Ste looks tke a. down ‘She oaks tke slut Fr g Reva S108 ery Spompr Toe Ope 65 ) ) ) a a a a > 9 3 a 3 a a a a a a taeda ye 3 but he watch es of er wom ev dunce er - ay aight with is bud des a dance dance dance i ood ad stip slat shake that boo = y stp stu shake that boo = y | sp 3 4 3 od Segue as one sey Singer Th ea 205, Rewsed 304 fm Fy Pe Fe mw Py me CG & &® & = ® ff Ff Ff PO PO PH TF Th OPP OT 18-I just wanna dance _ nein 3 Jere 3 3 3 3 a 9 3 3 & a ple think a - _ = z : a s A == a - ee : : 3 3 : — = E m & oe fh So 1 st wan nadance just wan na dance rem fof laugh = ing and Tm ured of cy = ing? Tim trod ee ee tied of all this try-ing Tan mt do. some liv-ing cause BV done = nowgh— dying FPA rraAnnn nt nm mm ‘ery sae oe Opes NF 200) i m | SUM | Ff | z | Hiies ——— 1 jst wan ma dance Dance tT Dance Dani 1 tjstenaa ne pet ® Mae tome —e Dance: of ugh ing and she's | tied of cry ing” shes | ted of fil in and shes Urdpai (os 2729s Mg Piano ail rod of al tis try-int She [wants 10 do some liv-ing Cos she's | done enough ying af oR ret mR me ef mm tt mmm a PRR om we wD DY Ww we bw z z i wuuuuuy PUREE eEUS ¢ \y) She ust santo dance she just wan hide, ae: ‘ary Srnger Te Opera NT 203 She just wants to fucking eo Bw ww ui veUe Beudbud uv buus df we 4 | ] & & Ser Speer Te Oca 2002 = 18-1 just wanna dance Richard Thomas (GYersion) Shawnie sw w Auaience ww Piano aw Siw? w le think 1 rer w Piano ey wo w w Piano see we w tired of all this ery ing 1 wan aa do some W-ing cae Tye done €- RO now Te ee sey Sing ile Berea vena 008 (y ft Ff Pm €} PP Perr rrr rnmnnReeeene a 81 yot wan de ge 3 — Accel. just was ea dance ee sey Sprnger-Te Opens 203 revised 9 © Maestcaty Soven s 7 bance ae of hugh ing and shes | red of cy ing? she's | red gael 2 J3/1 And tired of all is wy-int she | wane tod) some Wwoing Cos she's | done enough oo PE Fiano -eny Spr The Opa 28 a ee ee e 2 2 5 a g jdm ee ge $ ° 3 2 ® A mmr mM M™ M™ T M ™M MH MH MH M ony Sige Te pes 200 g mR rena nans 8A jeunona die pac soe Stee Ta Ope 203 ovedoN0 rrRMRrarnaan amma fr fpr om Mm # Pe py soul om ere 19-It has no name _ Richard Thomas pe er eet aeade2 has no mae j is a moe Z aa You—just 2 sack of mis-er = y Be = rything a ee wwe ww aw i ‘with pain swimming sound your ug-Iy ass your _skan-hy Sorry ass i ,,. ee owewwew wv sry Senger Be Open NT 2003 evant 301 your aus ery Spier Ths Opes NT 208 rPPmrmrPORrPRPrRRrRrRAnRrrRaArRmnrnrnmea»em « 10 Some were Ramage ae ub [avcomoieawine | 20-Some are descended from angels een ae tny Yow ams : —w Richard ‘Thomas @ J=82 Irene lb 3. 3 uw wa UW Some are the e-sult of om - ante lowe Others the re-sult of rapes Wall T dig fa areas you mew [chk wise youn a oh 0 Tempo (Slower) Shawatel a wish you'd diod at bin 100 wish shed dled at she don't stop TN fad me a= nother wo PUeBRBHEUY Uw BY wY q ie Shawntet What you gon-na do Fiano: at more plea iano. Tayher ord? Caeyy Gon na find mesomething Tin ted of your Ite dick Desh from fucking omy to re pce er tinted sagging old sin chor is a ny own You don't know shit You dort know shit He just. 2 Os od Whores oF lus ar pros-ti-tses z sey Span Te Ope N20} gk och oo oT FO FP ae fe Mm mM - > * ® # P ct 20 Some cde on ape pe 3 uw 5, ©) Faster In breed three alpople cousin fucker Jn breed three pepe | cousin fwck-er Three nip-ple cou-sin fuck 4 J if Tn breed three pple eou-sin fucker ‘Three aip-ple cousin fuck Wr WU GW vw Tou SL. SR. Tati In breed three nipple | cow sin fek er three nip-ple cou-sin fuck | three nip-ple cousin fuck three nip-ple coe-sn fuck } er 4 res ea Te In breod thee siprple co sin fick er three nip-ple causa fuck thew aip-ple cou-sin fuck tree nip-ple cousin fick - er © Beets ite ices one bate Ci] [Sa, no scerew then?) 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A Tempo Wou are there for us Jer D A [Steve, Let me get this straight] Dead Guests fe Jerry You | cat ex-crie And watch v os Jerry Dead Guests wweweww ewww ww fe [eect erreree ater eee | [win xacy a ey ying i » 5 wwe wow w “Jers Springer The Opera -N1 2003 eve 08 S 24a Bxerte page ON +06. §& N Jy Ks om am Tyree a Wy ng | et x ce and wah TY fet yor ae ter tee ¢. z ‘. sz Dead Guests Pee [ence 2 i 2 a _ S i & == ™m : To be frank ret y fucked [He,t can sympathise with that a : rly Eatin pe leietetnecererserien Wi of aiaus a = SS : come and see what you have | done to me f age PPRARRARPRRRARRRRRA ARH Jerry Springer The Opera -NF2003 st ge 25-The Haunting pge 1 25-The Haunting J-112 3 times Richard Thomas & Stewart Lee 1 So a eee One day you're sor-en-teen —sey-en-een se-ven-teen Thea st before youre eight = eeu Gg-= oon eoud&ow ds wy i Ft Sic Youve gt your whole ahead of you [And you'e «good looking woman Big Rall i eee a Sudden = Wy YOO re-a-lise you're Af y six ooo Buds mf i Shawntel BvYVUREUWYUBS Sen Springer The Opera NT 2005, Revise 08 oo we 25-The Hauming page 2 AMPRARRRARARAANnRReRrAnarea em hat made him eave —— ery Springes-The Opes -NT 2003 q i : 2-The! Hired and pad for by z 2 ew ww w z 5 6 Chucky 1 cue home froma Tg ty, bar Where Td spent all— e 5 oovvwswsuuwwe wy a sal " aa PEEL, She cov-ers me in Rer-o-some and sats me fuck-ing a » Eh > Ry 5 Jeary Spinges- The Opera NT 2003. ovact 6 oe ess 25-The Hating paged Yo a in ae your husband of tele yar? Was your anniversary” Gently You stole ay Reena a mm mw Pome Tm m pRrPPpPnnr fm Jey Springer: The Opers-NT2003 evset 06 25-The Haunting page 5 came back for more ) fies oe hing Barely sickens oes wslence [Vales soni TV sa acaclly [sata environ > as > ad g 3 ww ow ‘Tremont a When you fallin lore 1 coukl tat for-ev-et sual it fis aboot 2 moat www w : ‘erry Springer: The Opera NT 2003 evset0¢ swe ee & 25 The Haunting page te > 1 shot ay self in the ead but 1 mised and end ed wp tl dead > Mm eae! Now theres @ ole where my brain used to be fad Big Rall slur and 1 daboble and I lne on my dip feed But 1 sil can get a hard on if 1 jerk al 1 eed a : Jeg ad Jerk dT bleed ery Springer The Opera NT2003 25-The Hating page? PSSHGE a easedagiasanssezsatesasevansananentnennet eee ssencaessssaeraestatt 1 wade fone = ng man wwowoww E o ee wy Ww aw Ww) i Sieve: Twink we el eat ou ofbere 103 a ow Ww w g ¥ 5 ow Jem Spinge- The Opeea NT 2003 evied4 ad 25-The Haunting page 8 wT Funky NS re gui-ted love : and how ing at te moon You know what, gu, bwn grat caching] up with you and you've ken seme knocks, but you've got pick yourself up, [court off andhave a apeal dy aK Se epprnrnreeerererenreeertrnrRmreerRPmeRrnrraArA ex-erete and watch TV a Piano seory Springer The Opera NT 2008, eve 0 ; 25°The Hawtng page 9 ind you Behind a} sa Baby dane Sa fisby Tae, You Took Tesh a x [enthuse so oe a wo man vidk Jerry Spinger The Opera NT 2008 Rove 306 ie! gimme bee == as hole ‘Ma-ma gim-me smack on the bead ce a J e SSS = Ves 5 3 @ Ba 1 & Fiauo e c& Baby Js ce e rie e& e& & & & ees lee 25 The Haaing page 11 ‘ee ow Oe a aie z MEE Ere EEE ee ECE nee Eee cece Eee ce ae eer eet eer cise Eee eet etme ery Springer The Opera VF 2008, Revie 04 25-The Haueting age 12 © — — e © € 0 Rall. — a. stay dreams tgs tis nate] tat gi et a op Piano 7 yoy Baby Same —— my er = ry Springer : 1 did-nt want dat Fiano PRPRRR Am ff YY ex- cept de vel-opsing —coum-ttes andl Ger-man-y " PRR erry Springer Yue Opera NF 2005, even 0 25-The Maui page 1 Tinever know why hey (ake the show i Germany, ) Det get me started a feces | Pesce [ots Seca aces ere ae me ) d J atid [tua ) = Treno/Andrea/Baby Jane/Shawntel & Onhow ny heat tothe [ioe oe fee lia wid ata rr = art Ure Oe UL! z Pano z we we ewe eww w&. P » : Jeary Springer-The Opera NT 2003 ___25-1heHauming page 14 tocar up bac mkuniertandiog ae Yousit wanted tc come oa the sh otal ad your ten seconds tan walt gor stay ina tr tel You al gota expenses pai rp nism Br bills Chuck, > Caseago and irs Chicago remember tae windy ey city oF. win oualt nev the rks. You sign the dsclalmers, [chaser kta apoaloae? | [so stop brea [Can you bea huts spite = rt a Jer ty Jerry You tae been cho = sen m ? [cansen Tor win? Now stp fucking with me PP RRR bee Li pain pm f F pa “4 Jerry Springer. The Opera NT 2003, Pema | —_eawt-itnmenshn k= em OU ‘ey Springer: The Opens -NT 2003, 26 Him am the Devil page 1 26-Him am the Devil Richard Thomas & Stewart Lee des3 ” Nurse 7 aa cate (Gis taoser warm ap pup Jovan Wass] Piano The op lem bet Nase DG. Piano “erry Springer The Opera NT 2008 rested SOF PRRAMRAHKRAHRAAR ARH HARRAH A HSE Jerry Springer: The Opera NT 2003 evee S08 2b. 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