10128122, 4:27 PA ‘Amy Cutty; How Leadere Can Be Mote Presont In The Workplace Cookie Preferences LEADERSHIP Amy Cuddy: How Leaders Can Be More Present In The Workplace Dan Schawbel Former Contributor © Feb 16, 2016, 08:00am EST Ispoke to Amy Cuddy, a Professor and Researcher at Harvard Business School, about the importance of presence when it comes to leadership, the first steps to developing an executive presence, the best way to handle negotiating a promotion, why you shouldn't fake it'til you make it, and her best pieces of career advice. At HBS, Cuddy studies how nonverbal behavior and snap judgments affect people. Her research has been published in top academic journals and covered by NPR, the New York Times, Wired, Fast Company and more. Cuddy has been named a Game Changer by ‘Time, one of 50 Women Who Are Changing the World by Business Insider, and a Young Global Leader by the World Economie Forum. Her 2012 TED Talk is the second most-viewed talk in TED's history with 31 million views. Prior to joining Harvard Business School, Cuddy was an assistant professor at the Kellogg School of Management at Northwestern University, where she taught leadership in organizations in the MBA program and research methods in the doctoral program, and an assistant professor of psychology at Rutgers University, where she taught undergraduate social psychology. Her new book is htps:wur forbes. comstestdanschawb2016/C2/16lamy-cuddy how: leadars-can-be-moee-present-in-the-workplace/?sh=Badb 1863731 wso2see.427 eM Any Cui How Leaders Can Bo More Prev! In Te Workglce called Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges. Presence Credit: WBUR Dan Schawbel: For someone who is aspiring to become a leader at their company, how important is presence to their goal? Amy Cuddy: As I try to make clear in the book, it’s not about being present all the time because no one can do that. There is no ‘one who is present all the time but you work on becoming present when you are interacting with people who are working for you, being able to hear them without a sense of threat, to go into those meetings with confidence and not arrogance. All of these are qualities of presence that allow you to not only have constructive conversation but to really build trust with people. Your presence is signaling to them, “I’m interested in what you had to say. I’m engaged and I'm going to make sure I understand what you are saying before I respond.” Cookie Preferences People want to feel understood by their leaders, Trust comes before strength and it becomes a conduit of influence. Your strength is a htps:wur forbes. comstestdanschawb2016/C2/16lamy-cuddy how: leadars-can-be-moee-present-in-the-workplace/?sh=Badb 186373102s 427 M4 Any Cut How Lear Can Bo Mew resent Tha Worcs little bit threatening before people trust you. But when they trust you and you are their leader, it’s a gift to them. Presence allows you to build that trust because you are saying, “I'm here, I care about you. I’m listening and what [ am telling you to do is not just based on my own personal opinion but what I’m observing and hearing from you.” Schawbel: What are the first steps in developing executive presence and how do you know you're making an impact on others? Cuddy: | don't really see it different from just presence. I'm not sure that I can say anything that is unique about executive presence, I really think they are sort of the same thing. This idea of authenticity is churned around a lot. I think it is really important but I don’t think people understand what it means. And such that you truly know who you are, what are your values, what are your skills, and what makes you who you are. They have been ensuring hundreds of studies to help people reduce stress and improve their performance and know themselves better. I'm good enough, I'm smart enough. Self-affirmation is where people list their core values. These are things that really make them who they are, It might be helping people or the outdoors or art, all kinds of things can be a core value. You then write about why it’s important to you, you can rank them and you can take the first one or two. Write about why they are so important to you, and why they make you who you are, Then you write about a time when you were able to really express that value and how it felt. What was the response from others? How do you feel afterwards? That is self affirmation and what happens is when people do that, they feel so much more grounded that they are able to go into a situation that Cookie Preferences might be uncomfortable for them. htpelwur forbes, comistesdanechawbel/2016/C2/6lamy-cudy how. leadore-can-be-more-presen-iv-the-workplace/?eh=Badb 183731012822, 427 PM ‘Any Cuddy How Loaders Can Be Mote Pesan! In The Workplace Somebody who thinks they are not great at public speaking can go into that situation knowing that they know who they are, that they're safe and even if this doesn’t go well it’s not the end of the world. People knowing who they are is the first step. Then you have to able to deliver. When you go into the speech, whatever message that you're sharing, those core values undertone that message. You have to be able to believe the story you are telling. Oflen we believe the story until we get to the doorstep and then suddenly we look at it with self-doubt because we're so scared. We're afraid of being socially judged. Even the most powerful people in the world have these feelings. We get to the doorstep and we suddenly s art doubting ourselves and then we go in and we are not so sure that the story we are telling is quite right. We believed it five minutes earlier but now we are not sure. That's different from really not believing the story. You have a totally different situation. These postural things that I talk about are not just power posing like wonder woman but just holding yourself, holding your body in a way that’s open and proud and confident and poised, signals to your brain that you are not in a threatening situation. You are okay. You are safe. Your body is not going to go into the sort of go into the flight or fight mode which meauis you are free to be there, to be in the moment, to hear what’s actually happening instead of what you're afraid might be happening and to deliver that story with awesome confidence. I call it confidence without arrogance. What will happen when you come across it is your nonverbal and verbal behavior become synchronized. Schawhbel: If you're looking to get a promotion, or salary increase, what’s the best way to handle that using presence? Cookie Preferences htpelwur forbes, comistesdanechawbel/2016/C2/6lamy-cudy how. leadore-can-be-more-presen-iv-the-workplace/?eh=Badb 18373110128122, 4:27 PM ‘Any Cuddy: How Leadors Can Be More Prosant In The Workplace Cookie Preferences Cuddy: You need to do your homework and be prepared and understand what is it that you want and what are the steps to get there. When you are having the discussions about it with whoever is in control in making those decisions, you really need to focus on what's happening in that interaction. Again, you need to be present. When people get the job they stop focusing on the outcome. They go for the job interview and they decide if they are going to be there and they are going to see this as an opportunity to express who they are and to learn about that company and to hone their skills at job interviewing, But what happens is when they do that they walk away feeling more satisfied and are also more likely to get the job. Schawbel: A lot of people tell others to “fake it 'til you make it” to become successful. What do you believe? Cuddy: I don't believe that. Faking it 'til you make it is sort of faking it and then you make it and you continue to fake it. People instead have to fake it until they become what it is they want to be. So, they want to become themselves that they want to be. And they are not faking. I think fake it'til you make it, is about faking out to the other person. It’s about tricking the other person into thinking that you are something you are not. Fake it 'til you become it is actually about tricking yourself into being able to reveal your fullest best self. So, you say you are going to take a Math test and you have the knowledge but suddenly you choke. Faking it 'til you become it is being able to trick yourself that you are confident enough to reveal that knowledge. You unlock that knowledge. So, it’s really different. Faking it ‘til you make it is faking other people out. Fake it ‘til you become it is tricking yourself that you are confident enough to be who you really are. This happens slowly again over time. It’s not going to happen all at once. htpelwur forbes, comistesdanechawbel/2016/C2/6lamy-cudy how. leadore-can-be-more-presen-iv-the-workplace/?eh=Badb 18373110128122, 4:27 PA ‘Amy Cuddy: How Leadors Can Ba More Prosant In The Workplace Schawbel: What are your top three pieces of career advice? Cuddy: I think that this idea of knowing what your core values are and making sure that what you are doing for work aligns with those core values is critical. I think focusing on small improvements in the moment ahead of you instead of huge changes six months down the road is better, Don’t use big revelations because there a million little baby steps in between here and there and you are likely to say hello to a lot of them and end up quitting. If you focus instead on the moment and just getting something out of it, improving in some way, you can aggregate. I think you can move ahead much more quickly. If you remember that being strong is so much about being trustworthy. When you are confident enough to allow someone else to speak first, to take critical feedback in a way that is not insensitive. Trust before strength. That doesn’t mean strength isn’t important but just people are not going to care about your strength and they are not going to value it until they know you are trustworthy. Don’t think that you can keep your head down at your desk and do you work alone and never ask for help then you are going to get ahead that way, you're not. People want to work with people who they know they can trust and who ean work with others and who can respond and the only way you can respond is if you listen. Watch on Forbes: Follow me on Twitter or Linkedin. Check out my website. 9 Dan Schawbel 'm a partner and research director at Future Workplace, an executive Cookie Preferences development firm dedicated to rethinking and... Read More htps:wur forbes. comstestdanschawb2016/C2/16lamy-cuddy how: leadars-can-be-moee-present-in-the-workplace/?sh=Badb 186373110128122, 4:27 PA ‘Amy Cuddy: How Leadors Can Ba More Prosant In The Workplace Editorial Standarde Reprints & Permissione ADVERTISEMENT Cookie Preferences htps:wur forbes. comstestdanschawb2016/C2/16lamy-cuddy how: leadars-can-be-moee-present-in-the-workplace/?sh=Badb 1863731 7