Professional Documents
Culture Documents
As the days wore on, the fear ebbed. Okay, we could keep the baby alive. But what were we supposed to do with
her? She stared into space, showing no particular interest in our efforts to sing or dangle toys in front of her face.
"Look, baby, look at the monkey!" Nope. Just vacant stares, and then some crying to liven things up.
How your baby gets ready to achieve his first big developmental milestone.
Now that we both know a lot more about babies — or at least our baby — we know not to expect a lot of interaction
from a newborn. But that doesn't mean playing with your brand-new baby isn't important.
From day one, your baby's interested in what's going on around him. Deep in his head, there's a lot going on.
Connections are being made and information is being sorted and categorized.
Playing games helps fit the puzzle pieces together — as your baby grows, play is crucial for his social, emotional,
physical, and cognitive development. Play also brings you and your baby closer and makes your time together that
much more enjoyable. Remember: The more your baby laughs, the less he cries!
A few notes for the novice baby-entertainer: Repetition is important. Many games won't work the first time you play
them, but if you keep up your efforts your kid will eventually start cracking up the minute you reach for a particular toy.
Your baby's attention span will vary a lot, depending on his age, his temperament, and his mood. Sometimes he'll
enjoy a game for as long as 20 minutes, but more often you'll need to modify the game every five minutes or so.
You'll know your baby's loving your antics when he's turning toward you, smiling, or laughing. But if he squirms away
from you, looks away, or cries, it's time to change the activity.
Some babies are easily overstimulated. If yours starts to cry during playtime, don't despair. Switch to calmer activities
Keep in mind that not every baby will catch on to every game that's supposedly perfect for his age range. Don't allow
this to freak you out, as in: Oh no, Noah's not reaching out for objects yet — there's something wrong with
him! There's probably nothing at all wrong. Your baby may be a little slower than the mythical "average" baby in this
way, but he's probably ahead in another way. Of course, if you suspect your child has a developmental delay, talk to
his doctor.
Birth to 3 months
To the outside observer, a newborn basically seems like a pooping ball of protoplasm. Your baby will mostly just lie
there, except when he's crying. So how can you connect with him and have fun?
Your best chance of doing this is to engage your baby's senses: touch, sight (remember, your baby is still very
nearsighted), smell, and hearing. (Let's leave taste out for now.) By the end of his first three months, your baby may
reach out and try to grab things and will be fascinated by sounds, smells, and patterns.
Note: It may take your newborn several seconds to respond to you or he may not respond much at all. Be patient —
you may need to keep trying or wait a while for him to enter an alert, responsive state.
In the afternoons when my baby got grumpy, nothing worked as well as dancing with her. I'd put on some music —
she preferred soulful tunes from Stevie Wonder and James Brown — and either put her in the sling or hold her in my
arms.
At first she preferred soft swaying. Later on she liked me to swing her in the air or bump her up and down rather
rudely. (Just be sure to offer neck support and don't shake your baby.) When your arms get tired, put your baby down
Silly exaggerated movements like jazz hands or shaking your butt are particularly funny to babies. Close the drapes
Find two perfect, development-boosting activities for every week of your baby's first year.
Most of your early playtime will be spent showing your baby stuff. Any object in the house that won't poison,
electrocute, or otherwise hurt him is fair game. Babies love egg beaters, spoons, wire whisks, spatulas, books and
magazines with pictures, bottles of shampoo or conditioner (don't leave your baby alone with these!), record albums,
Keep a little stash of objects beside you and sit with your baby. When the moment's right, whip something out like a
magician. "Look, Kyle, Daddy's bicycle bell." Hold the object still about a foot from his face and stare at it yourself.
Hey, now that you look at it, that bicycle bell is kind of interesting. Congratulations! You're thinking like a baby!
Oh, and don't expect babies to really "get" books at this age. You'll know they're enjoying them by their way of getting
Babies don't tend to sit through a whole story, though, and when they're a few months older they'll grab the books
from you and close them. This is all developmental stuff. Babies love looking at books and cuddling close to you, but
they usually don't care about the plot.
You haven't spent a lifetime accumulating a closetful of bright, slinky, tactile clothing for nothing. Dig into your closet
and show your baby your cashmere sweater, your cottony-soft favorite jeans, your brilliant plaid skirt. Run soft or silky
fabrics over his face, hands, and feet. Lay fuzzy stuff down on the floor and put your baby on top of it.
In a few months, your baby will want to run his hands over anything beaded, embroidered, or otherwise embellished.
You'll be amazed at how much fun you can have with the simplest stuff around your house. Here are three ideas to
Tie or tape some ribbons, fabric, or other interesting streamers onto a wooden spoon and dangle them gently over
Take a floaty scarf and fling it into the air, letting it settle on your baby's head.
Tie a toy to an elastic string (like the kind used for cat toys) and bounce it up and down in front of your baby's face,
Remember, never leave your baby alone with strings or ribbons that could encircle his neck or that he could get into
his mouth.
You may have a terrible voice — but your kid doesn't know it! Now's the time to sing at volume 10, so set free that
Your baby may like absolutely anything you sing, but there are some classics you should know. "Itsy Bitsy
Spider" was the only song that made my baby stop crying when she was on a jag. And most kids like any song with
movements — "The Wheels on the Bus," "Row, Row, Row Your Boat," "Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes," and
"Patty-Cake," to name a few. (If you don't remember the words to a favorite song, try an Internet search. )
You may feel silly at first, but as your child gets into it, so will you. Try adding your baby's name to the song: "Old Mac
Ethan had a farm," "Kate is my sunshine, my only sunshine," and so on. Try songs with silly sounds or animal noises
in them, like "Witch Doctor" or "How Much Is That Doggie in the Window?"
Try singing a song in a low growly voice and then in a high squeaky voice, to see which gets the most reaction. Try
singing the song breathily into your baby's ear, or use a hand puppet (or a napkin or sock willing to play the part of a
hand puppet). And get used to singing, because this could begin to eat up a significant portion of your day.
4 to 6 months
At this age, your baby will become a lot more physical, learning how to roll over and evensit up. She can now hold,
handle, and mouth objects, and she'll spend a good part of her busy days doing so (meaning extra vigilance is
Games can get more physical now. Your baby might enjoy knee rides or tickle games. She's also more responsive to
You're in the kitchen, trying to throw some kind of dinner together when your baby starts wailing. Take her over to the
spice rack and introduce her to the intoxicating scent of cinnamon. Rub some on your hand and put it up to your
If she likes it, try others: Vanilla, peppermint, cumin, cloves, nutmeg, and many other herbs and spices have intriguing
fragrances that your baby might love. Other household goods are fragrant, too: Dad's shaving lotion, Mom's hand
cream. Sniff out everything yummy — just be careful not to let your baby eat it!
There's something magical about bubbles, and at this point your baby can see far enough away to focus on them.
Blow bubbles when she's getting fussy waiting for the bus and watch the tears dry up. Blow bubbles in the park to
attract older kids who'll caper nearby and entertain your baby in the process. Blow bubbles in the bathtub or out on
the porch when it's late afternoon and your baby is cranky. Bubbles are unbelievably cheap, easily transportable, and
Your baby is old enough to have a sense of anticipation now. And no baby can resist your coming at her mock-
menacingly with a threat of hugs, kisses, or tickles. Here's what you could say: "Hey, Andrea! I see you over there
sitting up! Well, that just makes you closer to my lips and I'm going to come over there and kiss you! I'm going to steal
a kiss, baby! I'm coming! I'm coming! I...gotcha!" Then cover your baby in smooches.
In our house we threaten to eat the baby and punctuate our advances with lip chomps on her fat little feet. A delicacy!
When your baby's older you can modify this game to include a chase around the house — this works wonderfully as
a way to get your child out the door when you're in a rush.
Touch your baby's toes in turn, starting with the big toe. Say, "This little piggy went to market, this little piggy stayed
home, this little piggy had roast beef, this little piggy had none. And this little piggy went wee-wee-wee all the way
home."
As you say that last part, run your fingers up your baby's belly. This game is useful for putting on socks and shoes or
distracting your baby during diaper changes. You can also play this game in the bathtub with a squirt bottle targeting
Tummy Time
By now, your doctor's probably nagging you to get your baby on her tummy, and your baby may be protesting
vociferously.
Get down on the floor with your baby. Look her in the eye as you lie on your own belly. Lay your baby down on a
towel and use it to gently roll her from side to side. Try saying, "Oops-a-daisy, Oops-a-daisy" as you roll her.
Now that your baby can hold her head up, it's time to hoist her into the air. You can play that she's a rocket ship,
flying her over you and making realistic rocket noises (dads are great at this). You can play that your baby is in an
elevator, which advances up floor by floor before sinking quickly to the bottom (my husband likes to bump noses with
our baby and say "Ding!" at this point). Or pretend that your baby's doing a helicopter traffic report.
7 to 9 months
Your baby's becoming an expert at sitting and may soon be crawling as well. Encourage these physical feats by
celebrating each new milestone: "Joshua, you sat up! Amazing baby!" Include a big hand for the little fella.
The ability to transfer objects from hand to hand and the fabled pincer grasp are part of your baby's increasing hand
control (which means you'll be forced to carry a container of O-shaped cereal with you at all times for the next year).
Your baby also begins to understand that when an object disappears, it hasn't fallen off the edge of the earth. This
discovery makes games like peek-a-boo a favorite.
If your baby has one object, he'll bang it on the table. If he has two objects, he'll bang them together, hold them up to
the light, squint at them, bang them separately on the table, hit the table with both at the same time, see if the object
sounds different when hit using the left hand rather than the right hand, and on and on.
Help him out by handing over objects that make interesting sounds: hollow containers, metal spoons, bells.
Pay attention to tactile sensations as well: Your baby will be fascinated by a greeting card laced with glitter or the
slickness of Mom's enameled jewelry box. A baby with strands of cooked spaghetti to play with wouldn't notice if a
Babies love cause and effect at this age, as in: I do this, the light comes on. I do that, the light goes off. Showing your
baby how to work light switches, remote controls, cell phones, and more will thrill him — but can make life more
difficult for you when he insists on being held up to work the lights yet again.
Instead, you may want to offer a toy phone or remote to satisfy his craving for control, or a jack-in-the-box to provide
a thrillingly surprising result. Or, let him manage his environment by filling a low-lying cabinet or drawer with safe
objects and letting your baby rummage around. Make sure there are no sharp edges or other dangers (dressers with
drawers pulled out can turn over on a child) and then let your baby go to town.
Obstacle Course
If your baby's crawling, scooting, or walking, he may enjoy the challenge of having to move over things. (This is great
for developing his motor skills, too.) Pillows, phone books, tired parents, and laundry make good obstacles. Sleeping
The classic: Hold up a towel between your face and your baby's and ask, "Where's Sam?There's Sam!" over and
over again. You can vary this game in a million ways. Hide behind a door and make your baby push it open to see
you. Hide behind a chair and pop out first from above then from the sides. Go behind a corner with another person
Keep a selection of hats behind the couch and pop up wearing a different one each time. A surefire laugh-getter is to
put a hat on your head, hiding your eyes, and let your baby take it off, saying "Oh!" in surprise each time he does it.
(This will also guarantee that you'll never wear a hat in peace again.)
Roll Play
Babies are fascinated by balls and how they move. You'll get a big laugh by juggling or tossing balls up in the air and
letting them hit the floor while you make a silly sound effect: "Whoops!" Roll a soft ball toward your baby and watch
him grab and squeeze it. Eventually, with encouragement, he'll roll the ball back toward you. And someday he'll be
able to kick and toss the ball or drop it into a big bowl or bucket. For now, bounce and roll.
10 to 12 months
Developmentally, your infant has suddenly morphed into an almost-toddler. Games that allow her to practice gross
(not as in "eww, gross!") motor skills such as standing, pulling up, and climbing are important for her now. Your baby
will also like to work on her fine motor skills by fiddling with the tag on your shirt or the pages of a book — and your
Your baby is figuring out the connections between objects in the world. She'll love to stack and arrange objects, as
Give your baby a box that's easy to open (like a shoe box) and show her how to put things inside and take them out.
At our house, this game quickly evolves into "Take everything out of Mommy's purse and fling it wildly around the
Another way to play this game: Get a bunch of cups (maybe even stackable measuring cups — ooh, two toys in one!)
and show your baby how to pour water, sand, or cornmeal from one to the other, or into a larger container.
Once your baby is up on her feet, you can encourage cruising by placing a favorite toy at the far end of the couch or
over on the coffee table. Try imitating your baby by putting one ofyour toys, such as your cell phone, a distance away
and cruising on your knees toward it. Your baby may find this amusing and come over to join you.
Encourage your baby to push an object around the room. Push toys and large empty boxes work well. Avoid folding
Top That, Kid
Babies this age love to imitate. Encourage this behavior by making a ridiculous noise and then nodding at your baby
to go ahead and try a noise. She may imitate you or make her own noise, which you can imitate. Or you can make up
Eventually you'll have created something that sounds like a techno song. Get up and dance to it! You can also play
this game with faces or movements — our kid likes to make the Nixon "V" sign and wave her hands around angrily.
No longer is your baby content to sit in the tub and be washed. Older babies want to stand up, splash, grab your hair,
pat the shower curtain, and so on. (Note: Never leave a baby unattended in the bath, not even for a second.)
Encourage the craziness by bringing in lots of toys. Plenty of stuff around the house can be endlessly filled, drained,
poured from or into, and floated. Pile up some plastic cups, yogurt containers, funnels, and squeeze bottles, and
bring them into the bath along with any of your baby's plastic toys.
Poke holes in the top of a plastic bottle with a flat cap to make a homemade watering can. Let your baby feel the
sensation of the water dripping onto her and show her how to cut off the flow by pressing with her hands. Use your
At the end of the bath, drain the toys in a plastic colander or a net bag suction-cupped to the side of the tub. Now